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Meanwhile, on "Con Man"...
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There is a doll convention?
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I'm in the wrong hotel!
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- No, I'm in the right hotel. - You're here for the sci-fi convention?
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The gay thing, it's an act to bring in the ladies!
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From "Serenity". It was a great tv show.
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Well... "Serenity" was the movie.
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- The television show was "Firefly". - That's good stuff.
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Kekokekokekokei!
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- Hello... beautiful. - Hello... beautiful.
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Con Man - Episode 6 - "Fluid Thing"
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sync and corrections by sadako415 www.addic7ed.com
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No, no, no, no...
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Look, she's the only woman under 60 in the hotel
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carrying around a baby doll.
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No, she's not a child. She's a woman.
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Did you see Battlestar Galactica?
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Yeah, the new one...
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She looks just like that hot, hot cylon.
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No, the other one.
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The other one...
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The other one.
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The other one.
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The other one.
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No, that... no...
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She was a cylon?
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Oh, right...
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It got really confusing in the later seasons...
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Listen, it doesn't matter. I just need to send her a bottle of wine
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to apologize for insulting the memory of her dead baby.
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Hello? Did you... Hello?
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- No service. No serv... - What...
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Why aren't you ready?
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We've got that meeting with that action figure guy.
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- You have a key to my room? - I overpacked.
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You stored things in my closet?
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I didn't know what costume I was gonna wear for the contest,
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so I brought backup.
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Oh, good... Here it is.
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- Hold this. - Oh, Jesus...
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Hold it, please.
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- What the hell is this? - Oh, I don't know...
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You have an alien in my closet?
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Yeah, well... I'm sure there's other things in there too we don't know about.
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What are you getting into costume now for?
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What? Just Bobbie looking like Bobbie.
47
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I'd say you're Bobbie looking like Luis Guzman.
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Oh, I see... You're upset!
49
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Because I have two suitors and you have none.
50
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Alright, Sean Maher's gay.
51
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Leslie Jordan is...
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He's gay. I mean, he might be bicurious,
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- bi-unlikely. - Wray...
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Sexuality is a fluid thing.
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A viscous translucent fluid...
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Whose smell is largely dictated
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- by its diet. - So glad I haven't eaten.
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Wray? It's Leslie.
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Leslie, hey...
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- Hey. - I need to talk to you about your manager.
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Me?
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Well look at you...
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Look at us...
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Hey, what is your...
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Political persuasion?
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I'm just wondering...
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Well I am...
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Totally liberal.
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My mind is so open that I'm afraid shit's gonna fall out of it when I bend over.
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And I love...
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The gays.
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Oh, I don't love the gays...
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Oh, you don't?
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I...
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- They make me very angry! - Yeah...
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Where do you guys get off besides on each other's backs?
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Well, I...
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A gay...
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Stand in front of you mocking
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your impotent authority!
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Yet I am strangely attracted...
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What am I saying? I...
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Just meet me!
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In the hotel bar...
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Six o'clock...
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So I can just understand how...
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Oh boy, yes...
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My levee is just about to burst...
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Your levee gonna burst!
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- Like Katrina... Oh, that's awful! - That's alright.
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- I like bad! - You're awful!
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You're awful!
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Goddamn!
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Goodbye?
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I could hear everything you were saying.
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Everything.
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Levees about to break?
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Leslie...
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Hey... Wray...
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- Hey, Sean. - Hi.
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I need to talk to you about your manager.
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Who, me?
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Hello...
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How are you?
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Hmm, just hangin'...
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Congratulations again
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on your win last night.
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Did I mention how...
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Courageous...
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I think you are?
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You can say it again.
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It is scary...
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To be extraordinary.
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Most people try and hide that part of themselves...
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But you... you embrace your true self.
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In the face...
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Of enormous...
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Opposition.
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- You are... - Horny.
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Courageous.
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These are amazing.
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Are they... Are they new?
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Used.
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You bought...
125
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Pre-owned...
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- Bra... Tits. - Tits.
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Doesn't matter.
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Doesn't matter...
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I see the real you.
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The one inside.
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I mean, the one outside is great...
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Too. I see a...
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A beautiful woman, with a...
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Cute little moustache...
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And ample used...
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Boobs. But...
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It is the person
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Inside...
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That I have to see tonight.
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How about 7?
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Meet me at the hotel bar.
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Alright.
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Goodbye?
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Wray, you're gonna have to meet with that action figure...
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Guy on your own. I've gotta shave.
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Do not use my razor!
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- Does this razor work on armpits? - No!
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Do you have another razor?
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- Ron Slackskin? - There he is!
150
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In person!
151
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It's really weird. Because this...
152
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Looks exactly like you.
153
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- Well that's great. Can I see it? - Yeah.
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Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But first...
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This...
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Is a true action figure.
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- Okay... - It has an action arm.
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So you push a button on its back,
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and it slams its hand down!
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I'll see you in hell!
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- It says that? - No, I just...
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Say that when it does it.
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- I'll see you in hell! - Okay...
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I'll see you in hell!
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- You... you keep saying it. Stop saying it. - I'll see you in hell! Oh, sorry.
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Can I see it?
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Yeah...
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People kept asking me why
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I made this figure.
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They bring up your coloring,
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the worst selling G.I. Joe figure in history.
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Ginger Joe.
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- Code name, Sunstroke. - Yeah, he came with a like...
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A floppy hat and a...
175
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- A mole checking kit. - Yes. No, I...
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Owned one. It also came with a gun.
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And some sunscreen.
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Well, the doll that I made you...
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Is awesome.
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Manly.
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Thank you. I can't wait to see it.
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Well, I'm nervous for you to see it.
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You don't like it.
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This is amazing.
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Are you kidding me?
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- Ron! - Really?
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You are an artist!
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Oh, come on...
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Oh, my god...
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Oh, my god!
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It looks just like...
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He comes with a gun, and a knife!
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And his arm...
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I will see you in hell!
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Yeah! There you go!
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Now look, that one is yours.
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Unbelievable!
198
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You get 100 bucks for every one you sign,
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I made 1000...
200
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And we've had insane presales.
201
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Holy shit...
202
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That's amazing!
203
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So, I'll see you at my booth. We start signing in 20 minutes.
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Okay, I will see you there,
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or in hell!
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That's good.
207
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Wow...
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Well, hello there, mister!
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- Handsome! - Thank you very much.
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Nice to meet you. My name is Wray.
211
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My name is Wray,
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Wray Wray.
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Your name is Wray Wray?
214
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Yes, that is a my name.
215
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I'm a now kiss you on the face.
216
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Wow. Where are you from? You have an accent.
217
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Yes, I was born in Japan.
218
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That's not a Japanese accent.
219
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Uh, you want a cookie?
220
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You want something to eat? Are you hungry? You've been in your box...
221
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Ah poo I don't want this!
222
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It's nasty to me!
223
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It's a store bought bullshit cookie!
224
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I want something from the set of a big budget movie!
225
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We'll get there.
226
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You're number one actor.
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You will have everything in life.
228
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You'll have money.
229
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- Yeah? - Yes!
230
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Better cookies...
231
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Yes!
232
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And women. Women, women!
233
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Women all the time!
234
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I like... I like women.
235
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Yes...
236
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- Oh, hi... - Is that an action figure of you?
237
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Yeah...
238
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That's hot.
239
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Wray Wray...
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Ladies and gentlemen, step right up
241
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to see the oddity,
242
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to see the freak of nature,
243
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Mr. Wray Nerely!
244
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Come get your signed autograph action figure
245
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of Cash!
246
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Can't hear now...
247
00:09:52,507 --> 00:09:54,666
Okay... Hi everybody!
248
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I will see you in hell!
249
00:10:03,352 --> 00:10:06,299
- I think Ron here has really outdone himself. - Yes.
250
00:10:06,309 --> 00:10:08,777
- Thank you. - Thank you, Ron. Look at that face.
251
00:10:08,787 --> 00:10:10,904
I named mine Wray Wray...
252
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Wray Wray, you want to say anything to everybody?
253
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I'm shy...
254
00:10:18,809 --> 00:10:21,597
Yes, protect me from too many people...
255
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It's strange in groups...
256
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Okay...
257
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Okay, who here...
258
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Wants to adopt one of their own?
259
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We have 3 left.
260
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- What? - Well, all of these presold online.
261
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No, look... Just sell them to the people
262
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Who are here!
263
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Yeah, but...
264
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The people online already bought them for a premium.
265
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We have... Oh, wait another sale...
266
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We have one left...
267
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Nope, sold out.
268
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How about the one you're holding?
269
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I'll pay a premium for it.
270
00:10:53,049 --> 00:10:54,076
No, no...
271
00:10:54,086 --> 00:10:55,546
No, this one is mine.
272
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700 bucks?
273
00:10:56,894 --> 00:10:58,673
700 bucks. 700, 700...
274
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725, 725... who's gonna go 7...
275
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750, 750...
276
00:11:02,455 --> 00:11:04,642
You, down there, over there, that wizard man...
277
00:11:04,652 --> 00:11:06,867
Alright, 800! 825, I'm jumping to 900...
278
00:11:06,877 --> 00:11:09,403
- Stop! Stop this, Bobbie, stop. - 900! I'm jumping to 925...
279
00:11:09,413 --> 00:11:11,079
This is not gonna happen, no. I'm...
280
00:11:11,443 --> 00:11:12,739
I'm not selling.
281
00:11:13,330 --> 00:11:15,119
1000 dollars for it!
282
00:11:16,071 --> 00:11:17,513
He is not an it!
283
00:11:18,893 --> 00:11:19,992
And he's mine.
284
00:11:22,008 --> 00:11:23,651
Get out of my way. Louise...
285
00:11:23,661 --> 00:11:25,228
Louise! Excuse me...
286
00:11:25,238 --> 00:11:26,933
Louise! Lou...
287
00:11:26,943 --> 00:11:28,243
- Louise! - Alright...
288
00:11:28,595 --> 00:11:31,031
1000 dollars to the man in green!
289
00:11:31,041 --> 00:11:34,945
- Thank you very much! Enjoy! - Somebody bought that action figure already.
290
00:11:37,812 --> 00:11:40,230
That one got lost in the mail.
291
00:11:40,280 --> 00:11:44,830
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