Original subtitles

(SEAGULLS CAWING)

NARRATOR: This is James Henry Trotter.

He lived with his mother and father in a cozy little house by the sea.

-Hey. I've got ya. -(GIGGLING)

Happy birthday, darling.

Now, quickly. Blow them out before the wind does.

Make a wish first.

NARRATOR: It was a wonderfuI Iife.

They had each other, and they had their dreams.

Look! That cloud looks like a camel.

And that one over there looks like a train engine.

Now, can you see the tallest building in the world?

I can't find it.

Try looking at it another way.

JAMES: I see it!

That's where we're going,

on a great ship that will take us across the ocean.

And we'll go right to the top of that building.

The three of us, on top of the world.

Are there any kids there like me?

Hundreds of them.

It's a wonderful place, James.

A city where dreams come true.

NARRATOR: Then, one day, a terrible thing happened.

(THUNDERING)

An angry rhinoceros appeared out of nowhere

and gobbled up his poor mother and father.

Their troubles, if they had any at all,

were over in 35 seconds flat.

(ROARING)

But James' troubles were just beginning.

(GASPING)

For now, he lives here with Aunt Sponge...

Get up, you lazy little bug.

...and Aunt Spiker.

You already wasted four minutes of daylight.

Look at him.

Lollygagging in dreamland when there's so much work to do.

SPONGE: Weeds to pull, wood to chop.

TOGETHER: Work, work, work, work, work!

Eww. Wouldn't want one of those nesting in your knickers.

I look and smell, (SNIFFS) I do declare,

as lovely as a rose.

Just feast your eyes upon my face.

Observe my shapely nose.

Behold my heavenly, silky locks.

And if I take off both my socks,

you'll see my dainty toes.

(GIGGLES)

But don't forget, my dearest Sponge,

how much your tummy shows.

(SNICKERING)

(FLUSTERED GASPING)

You lazy bug!

-Who told you to stop working? -I finished the wood.

A travel book? How dare you even dream of leaving!

This is the only home you'll ever have.

No one else would tolerate a worthless little nothing like you.

Where did you get this? Where?

Father gave it to me. He said we were to go there one day.

Stupid, foolish man.

SPONGE: Foolish man. Always dreaming.

-That's what got him killed. -And your mother.

Had his head in the clouds instead of looking where he was going!

SPIKER: He never even saw that rhino coming.

That rhino.

And the beast will get you, too, if you don't behave.

Now get these stupid dreams out of your head!

TOGETHER: And get back to work!

(WIND GUSTING)

(MAN SINGING ON RADIO)

Careful, Spongy. Wouldn't want to ruin that girlish figure.

Oh, shut up.

-Yes? -I've finished all of the chores.

What a coincidence. We've finished all the dinner.

Oh, Sponge. You're such a tease.

There's something special waiting for you in the oven.

(CHUCKLING)

(INSECT BUZZING)

(DISGUSTED GRUNT)

(GULPS) Oh, do let me guess.

They're not good enough for him.

What do you think this is? Buckingham Palace?

Yuck!

(BUZZING CONTINUES)

SPONGE: Get out of our sight!

Go on!

(BURPS)

Hello, there! Where did you come from?

You know, you probably shouldn't build your web up here in the window.

Spiker and Sponge might see you, and they hate spiders.

I'll be your friend, though.

(SINGING) My name is James

That's what Mother called me

My name is James

So it's always been

Sometimes l forget

When I'm lonely or afraid

Then I'll go inside my head

And look for James

Here's something I've never shown anyone.

(SINGING) There's a city that I dreamed of

Very far from here

Very, very far away from here

Very far away

There are people in the city

And they're kind to me

But it's very, very far away you know

Very far

They'll say, James, James

James, how are ya?

Isn't it a lovely day?

James, James, James

We're so glad you came here

Where we are

From so very, very, very far

My name is James

James, James

Good night. Pleasant dreams.

SPIKER: (SCREAMING) Spider! Vermin! Oh, beast!

(GASPING)

No! Wait!

-SPIKER: Sponge! -Wait! I'll get it! I'll get it!

Kill it! Kill it! Kill it!

Where is it? Whoo!

Ahhh!

(BOTH GRUNTING)

Get it! Get it! Ahhh!

-(BREATHLESSLY) Kill it. -Ahhh! Get it! Get it!

-Kill it! -Get it! Ahhh!

You hit me in the face. You hit me in the face!

SPIKER: Oh, do shut up!

(PANTING)

Go on. Get out of here. Get as far away from this place as you possibly can.

Oh, I wish I could.

-What's stopping you? -(GASPS)

Oh, don't be frightened, James. I mean you no harm.

How'd you know my name?

(SOFT CHUCKLE)

I know more than just your name.

What would you say if I were to tell you

that the answer to all your troubles is right here

inside this little bag?

-Hey! That's my... -Of course it is.

Go on, James. Have a look.

There's more magic in them things

than in all the rest of the world put together.

But what are they?

-Crocodile tongues. -Tongues?

One thousand long, slimy crocodile tongues.

Boiled in the skull of a dead witch for 20 days and 20 nights.

Add the fingers of a young monkey, the gizzard of a pig,

the beak of a parrot and three spoonfuls of sugar.

Stew for a week, and then let the moon...

-(GASPS) -...do the rest.

Have 'em, and marvelous things will happen.

Things even you never dreamt of.

-Like what? -Well, like

you'll never be miserable again.

And you are miserable, aren't you, James?

You weren't meant to be, you know.

And that place you're dreamin' of,

it's not as far away as you think.

JAMES: New York City!

And it'll be that much closer, once you take the first step.

But how? This doesn't make any sense.

Not up here, it doesn't.

The answers are in here,

and the magic is in here.

So, James, what'll it be?

Now listen to me, James. Don't let them get away, because if they do,

they'll work their magic on whoever or whatever they meet first.

Understand?

-(WIND BLASTING) -Good.

SPIKER: What's going on out here?

Uuh! No! No, wait!

(TONGUES SQUEALING)

Wait! No! No, wait!

Wait. Just a... Wait.

Here he is. Get up, you little worm!

-We sent you out here to kill a spider. -Not to laze about.

I wasn't lazing about. I tripped.

How dare you disagree with us?

Beat him, Sponge.

(SIGHS) It's too early.

Well, that makes you the luckiest boy alive.

Now come inside and get dressed.

(YAWNS)

Spiker, look! A peach.

-A what? -A peach! There! On that branch.

SPIKER: Why, that old tree's never had so much as a blossom on it,

let alone a...

Well, I'll be blowed.

There really is a peach there.

A nice, big one, too.

How can we get it?

-The boy. -The boy.

Now, you be a good little boy

and climb up there and get that peach for your dear aunties.

-Can we eat it? -Of course we can. We'll share it.

Me and your Aunt Spiker! Now start climbing.

-Wait! -SPONGE: What? What? What?

It's... It's growing!

-The boy? -No. The peach, you idiot!

SPIKER: Look!

-Oh. Come down. -But I won't get hurt.

Climb down!

What a peach. What a peach!

SPONGE: Look, Spiker! It's still growing!

I'm not blind, you dolt. I can see it myself.

-Ohh! -Ohh!

Look at it go! It's a miracle!

It's coming down. Stand back!

(SPONGE WHIMPERING)

SPIKER: Oh, my heavens! My...

(GASPS)

Marvelous things will happen, just like he said.

Shut up, you little grub.

This has nothing to do with you, so just keep away from it.

Oh! (SNIFFING) Can you smell that, Spikey?

It smells delicious.

No!

It smells like money.

(CHILDREN CHATTERING)

SPONGE: Roll up. Roll up. See the giant peach.

The Eighth Wonder of the World.

Have your money ready, ladies and gentlemen.

Chance of a lifetime. Ten bob only.

No peeking at the peach!

Have your money ready, ladies and gentlemen.

In you go.

-Can we touch it? -Touch it? You want to touch it?

-Huh! She'll be wanting to taste it next. -Admission refused.

This child has too many cheeky ideas. Go away!

-SPONGE: Quite right. -Oh, Sponge.

(SPIKER GIGGLING)

SPONGE: A photographer.

-(SHUTTER CLICKING) -And another.

-Best side. -(SHUTTER CLICKING)

-Move on in. -No cameras allowed.

Don't dawdle. Come along, ladies and gentlemen!

-Sorry, Father. It'll cost you double. -May God forgive you.

Thank you, Father.

SPONGE: (VOICE ECHOING) Come along, children.

Last chance of the day.

(SINGSONG VOICE) Yoo-hoo! Come down here.

Yes, Auntie Sponge?

Ooh, you're all spiffed up.

I was hoping to play with the children.

-Aw! -Aw!

The children have gone.

But you can play with their garbage.

Heh, heh, heh! Garbage. Heh, heh, heh!

(SPIKER CHUCKLING)

And don't even think of going near our peach.

'Cause if you do, remember, they never did catch that rhino.

(BOTH CHUCKLING)

(SIGHING)

(TONGUE SQUEALING) (GASPS)

No! Wait a moment! Wait!

(DISAPPOINTED SIGH)

(SNIFFING)

Ah.

FEMALE VOICE: 'Ere, now. Where do you think you're going, Yank?

MALE VOICE 1 : I'm goin' stir crazy. I gotta take a look around.

Plan our escape from Spiker and Sponge.

MALE VOICE 2: Escape? To where?

We'll all be squashed, swatted, smooshed!

No one's going to smoosh you, my dear boy.

-You're six feet long now. -Bigger target.

Let the biddies come. I'll take 'em both on.

I'm indefeatable. I'm indivisible. I'm...

-Whoa! -...in trouble!

(ALL GRUNTING, SCREAMING)

It's Spiker and Sponge! They've found us!

-Hello! -Oof! Uuh!

No, no, no. It's the lad from the house. What's his name?

-Miserable tick. -I thought it was "rotten little grub."

No. That's what those horrible aunts call him.

(JAMES SHRIEKS)

His real name is... Well, it's, eh, eh...

-It's James. -Aah!

Look what you've done now, miss. Scared him to death.

Please! Don't eat me!

-Eat you? -(LAUGHING)

Hey, Glowworm. Turn up your lights.

-(ELECTRICAL CRACKLING) -Ah!

-I'm a vegetarian. -I eat dirt.

No one will be eating you, James.

Nah. She'll just puncture your head and suck out the brains.

-That I am saving for you. -Whoa! Pretty fast, long legs.

-(HISSING) -Oh-oo-oo!

Oh, such rude behavior.

There's no need to be frightened, dearie.

But you're enormous bugs!

Fascinating, isn't it?

We've all changed, and so have you, James.

(GASPS)

The old man, the one who gave me the green things,

he said marvelous things would happen.

Did he say, "marvelous pigs in satin"?

No, dear lady.

"Marvelous things will happen."

Poor Glowworm. She's a little deaf.

I, however, have exquisite hearing.

Yeah? Well, listen to this.

(FLATULENT NOISES)

Let's get outta here!

You mean leave the hill? I can't! The rhino will get me.

Rhino?

(CHUCKLES) I say, dear boy.

I've lived on this miserable hill for decades.

There are no rhinoceri here.

Except for Sponge. She's twice as big as a rhino, eh, kid?

(CHUCKLES) (GIGGLES)

And twice as dangerous. My life hangs by a thread every day.

I've had to send all 300 of me children to safer pastures.

Hah! You think hiding in solid rock is fun?

I can't even remember what fun is.

Well, that's just 'cause you been stuck here too long.

Listen to me, kid. I know a place that will refresh your memory.

(SINGING) Bright lights Big city

That's where we gotta go

Where the food is great and the bugs are so pretty

I'd like to get my arms around a hundred or so

I'd hug 'em, squeeze 'em hold 'em tight

Sleep all day Dance all night

I want the bright lights and the big city

That's the life for me, yeah That's the life for...

You little maggot Have you never seen the moon

Gliding 'cross the western sky

A dead oak tree by the waterside

Putrid vapors rising

(COUGHING)

That sounds lovely, dear. I'm sure we all agree.

(SINGING) But l prefer the sunshine

A little park right in the center of the town

La-la

Flowers everywhere Children all around me, l'd love it

Landing on a baby's cheek so warm

-lt's wonderful, wonderful -Wonderful

(SNIFFING)

-That's the life for me -Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha

That's the life That's the life for me

-Elegant conversation -Bright lights, big city

-An elevated point of view -That's where I'd go

lntellectual stimulation

Yeah, maybe for you.

And someone you love to share it with you

ALL: lt would be wonderful

Wonderful

That's the life for me

You call that a life?

That's the life for me

It's no pile of dirt.

That's the life That's the life

That's the life That's the life for...

SPONGE: Where are you hiding, boy?

Hup! Time to go make a pest of myself. Heh-heh!

Look at this place. It's still filthy.

SPIKER: Where are you, you detestable little worm?

-Ahhh! -Not you. Me!

You better not be near our peach.

Oh, please! Don't let them spray us!

Spray us? They'll see the Yank up there and come after us with a shovel.

-It happened to my brother. -How awful.

Split him right down the middle. Now I have two half-brothers.

Shh. They'll hear us.

SPIKER: Yoo-hoo! Where are you, boy?

I think I hear a rhino out here.

Ah. This'll be a snap.

(SAWING SOUND)

Shh. I really do hear something.

-(WHISPERING) Timber. -(CRASHING)

(RUMBLING)

-What's that? -Fasten your seat belts, kids.

-Ahhh! The car! -Ahhh! The car!

-We're turning! -Wha-wha-wha... What have you done?

(SCREAMING)

Start, start, you piece ofjunk.

(ENGINE SPUTTERING)

-Oh! -Oh!

Ahhh!

It's the peach! Our peach! We'll be killed!

Whoa! I'm falling head over head over head!

Ahhh!

CENTIPEDE: Here, stomach! Here, stomach! Here, stomach!

(CLUCKING)

(CROWING)

(FRIGHTENED MOANING)

-I'm gonna be sick. -Yee!

-Our peach! -Our peach!

(CRASHING)

EARTHWORM: Ow! Somebody pinched me.

Sorry. I thought you were the Spider.

-(INDIGNANT GASP) -Ouch. What was that?

Excuse. I thought you were the Centipede.

Hey, Glowworm. How about some light?

I can't hear you, dear. I'll have to put my light on.

-(ELECTRICAL CRACKLING) -Oh. Oh.

This is so "unladybug-like."

Don't worry. I'll have you right-side up in no time.

Thank you, James.

-Where are you going? -To see where we've landed.

(SEAGULLS CAWING)

Whoa!

Oh, my!

Oh, my, my.

Oh, my achin' back.

Oh!

Fascinating, isn't it?

EARTHWORM: What? What's fascinating?

Tell me. Don't leave me dangling.

We're in the middle of the... How do you say, the big puddle?

-Biggest puddle of them all, angel fangs. -(SMACKS LIPS CONTEMPTUOUSLY)

The Atlantic Ocean.

Technically, the Pacific is larger.

Well, that goes without saying.

But there is land in sight?

Nothing but blue skies and clear waters.

-Uh! This is all your fault. -Hey!

If it wasn't for me, we'd all be Spiked and Sponged by now!

This old man with his green things,

did he happen to speak to where we are going?

No. All he said was the answers would be right here.

Huh? My travel book!

And look! It's the peach!

We're going to New York City!

(COUGHS) New York? They love me there!

Wonderful! They've got a whole park full of leaves for you, Miss Ladybug.

-Central Park. -And loads of dark hiding places.

-Nightclubs. -And museums and concerts.

-Not to mention Yankee Stadium. -What about me?

Why, they've got miles and miles of underground tunnels.

The subway!

My father says it's the place where dreams come true.

-(SINGING) That's the life forme -That's the life for me

-That's the life for me -That's the life for me

-That's the life -That's the life

That's the life

That's the life for me

New York it is, then.

Now, how do we get there?

-I'll get us there! -You?

Sure! I've sailed all the five seas.

From the sun-drenched reefs of Bora-Bora

-to the icy shores of Tripoli. -Oh!

"Commodore Centipede,"

-they used to call me. -(YAWNS)

-Seven. -Huh?

There are seven seas,

and Tripoli is in the subtropics, Commodore.

-Trim the sails! -There are no sails.

-Stoke the engine! -There are no engines.

I can't work with this miserable crew.

Great! We're stuck here until we shrivel up and die.

-Highly improbable. -That's a relief.

We're far more likely to drown.

LADYBUG: (GASPS) Oh, no!

(CAWING)

I know! We could...

No. It's a stupid idea.

-Compared to what? -Hey!

-Well, we could fly out. -Hmm.

He's right. It's stupid.

-(GRUNTING) -How would you do it, James?

With the seagulls, but we'll need string.

Oh, well, I'll just go to the stationer's

and pick up some paper clips while I'm at it.

I have string. Miles of string.

And we'll need bait, bird bait.

Bird bait? Where do you expect we're gonna find bird bait

-out here in the middle of the... The... -(CLANGING)

Oh, no! No, no!

Have you lost your minds? Ahhh!

They've lost their minds!

Anything but birds!

(WHISPERING) Don't worry. I'm right here.

-Now wiggle. -No!

But they won't come if you don't wiggle.

Exactly! And you can't make me.

-Oh, yeah? (BABBLING, CHUCKLING) -Stop! Ah-ha-ha!

(LAUGHING)

Oh. Hey, no fair! Mockingbirds munched me mother!

Here comes the first one. Get ready to pull down there.

My sisters were swallowed by swallows!

(LAUGHING CONTINUES)

-Pull! -EARTHWORM: Whoo!

(WHIMPERING SCREECH)

It worked! I got one!

Shh! I hear teeth.

Great, big, gnashing teeth.

-(LOW RUMBLING) -Sounds like a rhinoceros.

In the ocean? Scientifically impossible.

I hear something, too.

It's a school of tuna.

They're being sucked into some sort of machine.

-What do you mean? -Take a look.

(SHRIEKING)

JAMES: It's a giant shark!

(ALARM BLARING)

-It seems to have spotted us. -(GASPS)

-What do we do? What do we do? -The seagulls!

It's our only chance!

It would take the whole flock and then some. We'll never do it in time.

We'll use Miss Spider's web for a net. Hurry!

Throw it here, dearie.

Wiggle, Mr. Earthworm. Our lives depend on it.

-I can't! I'm all wiggled out. -Aw!

(BOTH GRUNTING)

-Here. Let me help you. -(FRIGHTENED GASPING)

(SCREAMING)

Come and get it! Get your fresh, hot wienie!

-Yaaah! Uugh! -Come on, baby.

(GRUNTS)

I got 'em! Hand me the loops!

-Hurry! -Shake a leg, there.

Keep your pants on. I've only got 1 2 hands.

(RUMBLING)

-It's getting closer. -(CENTIPEDE GRUNTS)

Seagulls, away!

(ALL SQUAWKING)

(BOTH GASPING)

-Oh, no! -Oh, dear!

(MACHINERY STRAINING)

Huh-huh-ho! Daah! Uuh!

(GROANING)

-Yow! -Oh!

Arf, arf, arf!

(STRAINING)

-Arf! -They're getting away!

Hop on, James!

Now, grab them!

(ALL SCREECHING)

(BELLOWING)

(BARKING)

-Help! -Help!

LADYBUG: Hooligans! Ruffians!

Degenerates!

Uuh! Uhh!

-Come on, seagulls! -Put your backs into it!

Shake your bloomin' tail feathers!

(NERVOUSLY) Good sharky. Nice sharky.

(MACHINERY BOOMS)

Oh! Sharky!

(GRUNTS)

(YELLING)

(MACHINE WINCH CRANKING) (EXHAUSTED SIGH)

-Oof! -Gaah!

(SCREAMING)

-Ah! -Oh! Uuh!

(MACHINERY STRAINING)

Hooray!

All right! Teach you to mess with me, you overgrown sardine!

I'm from Brooklyn.

Oh, ho-ho! Pure twaddle! Every bug on board displayed extraordinary courage.

Why, did you see Miss Ladybug risk life and wing

-to bash those brutes on the snoot? -Ooh!

Well, they were being very rude. I can't abide rudeness.

We are all forgetting something.

Everything we did was part of the brilliant plan of James.

It really did work, didn't it?

-I say three cheers for James. Hip-hip. -Hooray!

-Hip-hip. -Hooray!

New York,

here we come!

-Ooh-ooh! -Whoever you are,

keep away from me! Keep away!

-Mr. Earthworm, it's me! -Wha-wha-wha...

Oh, James! Oh, thank goodness.

You mustn't frighten yourself like this all the time.

-Why not? -You'll make yourself sick.

When I had a problem,

my mum and dad would tell me to look at it another way.

How? First I was bird bait. Then I was shark bait.

I suppose. Or you could say you gave us wings to fly

and defeated a giant shark single-handedly.

-No-handedly. -Exactly. You're a hero.

I am? I'm Wonder Worm!

You are.

Want food.

Food.

(GROANING)

Are you sure you know where we're going?

I don't see how you can navigate without a compass.

(SIGHING) (CORK POPPING)

Huh?

It's very hot up here. I'm roasted.

(SHUDDERING) Huh?

(SCREECHING TO CLUCKING)

(GIGGLING)

-Unhand that bird! -Ahhh! But I'm dyin' of hunger.

Oh, perhaps I have a bit of soda bread in here somewhere.

-Food? -It's not much,

-but it's... -Not so fast!

-Hey! -You?

I need this food. I have a much higher metabolism.

-Bite me! -What?

Have you two gone mad?

CENTIPEDE: Let go of it, gramps!

-Give it! Give it to me! -Let go of my coat!

-Give it to me! -Ow!

-My lower thorax. -I'll rip you apart!

-I tell you, it's mine! -Give it back!

TOGETHER: (GROWLING) Now look what you've done!

We're going to starve. Waste away. And not quickly.

Oh, no. That would be the easy way out. We'll linger.

-(GRUNTING, GROANING) -Slowly. Miserably. Painfully.

-Nobody's going to starve. -Eh?

Don't you see? We have enough food here for five voyages.

-Food? Where? -Is there really food?

What are you talkin' about?

Our whole ship is made of food.

Oh, such a clever little boy.

Takes after me.

After you, there is nothing left to take.

Delectable! Mmm-mmm!

-Better than aphids. -Mm, better than ladybugs.

-What? -Excuse.

It's not dirt, but it's not bad.

"Not bad"? It's the best thing I've ever tasted,

and I have tasted a lot.

(SINGING) l've eaten many strange and scrumptious dishes in my time

Like chili bugs and curried slugs

And earwigs cooked in slime

And mice with rice is very nice

When they're roasted in their prime

But don't forget to sprinkle them with just a pinch of grime

I'm crazy 'bout mosquitoes on a piece of buttered toast

And pickled spines of porcupines and then a great, big roast

And dragon's flesh Quite old, not fresh

lt costs a buck at most

Does it come with gravy?

It comes to you in barrels if you order it by post

TOGETHER: lt comes to you in barrels if you order it by post

For dinner on my birthday

Shall l tell you what l chose

Hot noodles made of poodles on a slice of garden hose

And a rather smellyjelly

Made of armadillos' toes

The jelly is delicious

But you have to hold your nose

Peach, peach, peach, peach Peach, peach, peach, peach

Peach, peach, peach, peach

I crave the tasty tentacles of octopi for tea

I like hot dogs but I love hot frogs and surely you'll agree

A plate of soil with engine oil's a super recipe

TOGETHER: Recipe

I hardly need to mention that it's practically free

Peach, peach, peach, peach Peach, peach, peach, peach

Ahh-ahh

Peach, peach, peach, peach Peach, peach, peach, peach

TOGETHER: We hardly need to mention that it's practically free

Now comes, my fellow travelers the burden of my speech

You show-off!

These foods are rare, beyond compare

And some right out of reach

Nice aim, Commodore.

But there's no doubt I'd go without

A million plates of each

Out of my face!

-For one small mite -One small mite

One tiny bite

Tiny bite of this fantastic

Peach

Peach, peach, peach, peach Peach, peach, peach, peach

Stop! Stop!

Peach, peach, peach, peach

-What's going on? -Oh!

-Bull's-eye! -Comin' at you!

Watch this!

This fantastic peach

(SNORING)

(MUMBLING)

(SNORING)

(HOOTING)

(LOUD SNORING)

(YAWNING)

You keep to yourself, don't you?

I prefer to be alone.

I was alone for a long time once.

I think it's much nicer to have friends. Don't you?

I would not know.

They would be your friends, too, the others, I mean, if you'd just let them.

No. It is in their nature to have fear of me.

-This I cannot change. -You're very kind to me.

Maybe this is because you are kind to me first.

-You were the spider in my window! -Mmm-hmm.

You were my first friend.

I mean, since I went to live with my aunts.

-They hated me! -Shh. Do not think of them now.

But what if they find us?

What if we don't make it to New York?

I'll die if I have to go back to the way I was! They can't make me!

Nobody can make you do anything, James, if you do not let them.

You are a brave boy.

Now, to sleep.

You have had a very tired-making day.

(BLOWS)

(YAWNS)

(RUMBLING)

(GASPS)

(CAR SQUEAKING)

(ENGINE RATTLING)

Look! The little maggot's stuffing his face with our peach!

Get him, Sponge.

(SCREAMS)

You can't crawl away from us!

(SMOKE HISSING)

(AUNTS CHANTING)

-The rhino will get you. -The rhino will get you.

The rhino will get you.

(GROANING)

(GASPING)

(SHIVERING)

-(WIND HOWLING) -Whoa.

(SHIVERING)

(BIRDS CRYING)

GRASSHOPPER: This is an outrage!

You are a disgrace to your phylum, class, order, genus and species!

-Say it in English! -You, sir, are an ass!

Where are we? What's going on?

I found this dime-store Timmy asleep at the helm.

-Now we're lost. -We are not lost!

-Then where are we? -Somewhere north!

Or possibly very, very far south.

What's your latitude? What's your longitude?

Hey, hey, hey! That's personal, bub.

-You said you could navigate! -You said you'd traveled the world.

You said you'd been to Bora-Bora.

-Well, not Bora-Bora, per se, uh... -What about the shores of Tripoli?

Did I say "Tripoli"? (CHUCKLES) I meant the halls of Montezuma.

-That's what you said. -Never have I heard such mendacity!

-You liar. -Charlatan!

Wait!

If he says he's seen the world, then he's seen the world.

Right, Mr. Centipede? Right?

Well, I did used to live between two pages of a National Geographic.

-Huh? -(GASPS)

Very informative magazine, the National Geographic.

Wonderful pictures.

You incompetent, blithering nitwit!

All right, hoppy! Them's fightin' words!

Put 'em up! Put 'em up! Come on! Give me your best shot!

(GROANS)

Whoa! Good shot. (SPITS) Did you see what he did to me?

Hmph! Serves ya right.

What do we do now? Which way do we go?

Oh, it's simple, really.

All we need to do is determine our coordinates,

then use triangulation to chart a direct route to New York.

-Then there's hope. -Don't be ridiculous.

There's no hope at all. We don't have a compass.

We'll never reach New York.

We're gonna be stuck here forever.

We're gonna be frozen like living statues.

-Dead living statues. -(GASPS)

SPIDER: No dark hiding places.

-LADYBUG: No cozy leaf in the park. -(CRYING)

JAMES: No city where dreams come true.

-Don't ships have compasses? -No doubt.

But to brave those icy waters would mean certain death.

-(GULPS) -Only a fool would do it.

Uh-huh.

Geronimo!

-What? What? What was that? -The Centipede jumped in!

-(GASPS) -Good heavens!

He's committed pesticide!

Oh, this is all my doing.

Don't take all the credit. I helped, too.

-I have to go after him! -Not on your life.

You'll catch your death of cold.

-But he's my friend! -James is right.

Centipede is one of us. Get on my back. I am going with you.

-You had better take good care of him. -This I promise.

Stay by the line, and when you feel two tugs, pull us up.

(CENTIPEDE WHISTLING)

A skellington?

Hmm?

Jackpot! A genuine compass!

(SQUEAKING)

Sounds like you need a little oil, Captain.

Thank you, sir! I'll be shovin' off now.

(GROWLING)

(SCREAMS) I shoulda worn a belt!

(GASPING)

(GRUNTS)

-(ROARING) -Holy shipwreck!

(GROANS) (CHUCKLES)

(CENTIPEDE GROANING)

(BOTH GASP)

Listen, fellas. I got a long history of back problems,

and I don't need it to get any longer.

(SCREAMING)

Ahhh! Ah!

-(BONES CRACKING) -Ah! Hey. That one felt pretty good.

(RUMBLING) (GROWLS)

It's Paul Bunyan comin' to cut me some slack.

Whoa! Hey, pal. You're aimin' a little low.

He's gonna cut me in half!

Hey, sailors! Looking for some kicks?

Ooh! Cut me loose!

(GROWLING)

Get the compass!

(GRUMBLING) Ah!

-I've got it! -Ubutu! (GRUNTS)

(WARLIKE GRUNTS)

Whoa!

(GROANS)

(GROWLS)

Gotcha!

(SQUAWKS)

-Polly want a smacker? -(GRUNTS)

-Look out! -(DUCK QUACKS)

(GROANS)

-Sounds like big trouble. -Get ready to pull.

(CAPTAIN GROWLING)

I got a good one for ya. Why don't skeletons play music in church?

Oh!

'Cause they got no organs!

-(BELL RINGING) -A-ha-ha!

(SCREAMING)

(GRUNTING)

BOTH: Noo-oo!

Oh, thank goodness! You're all right.

-What happened to Centipede? -He found a compass for us.

-And a shipload of pirates! -Hold this. I am going back.

Do be careful, Miss Spider.

(GASPS) Oh!

(SNIFFLES)

Poor Centipede.

He saved our lives down there.

-Look out! -Miss Spider!

(GASPS)

(LAUGHING)

-Centipede! -How am I lookin', kid?

Oh, Centipede. I do not know whether to kill you or kiss you.

(GRUNTING) (CENTIPEDE CHUCKLING)

-Well, I... Say, I'm sorry. -Well, I'll say I'm sorry.

-My sincere apologies. -I just, I just wanna apologize.

-I just wanted to say... -What I'm tryin' to say...

That's enough chit-chat! I'm freezing!

Hello? The compass is ready.

Mr. Centipede, would you please do us the honor

of navigating us out of this icebox?

It would be my pleasure.

I believe our position puts us very close to...

I admire your bravery, Miss Spider. I really do.

Why, thank you, Mrs. Ladybug.

All right, boys. Coffee break's over.

(SQUAWKING)

(GRUNTING SOFTLY)

I'm looking forward to a hopping good time

in the Big Apple, Mr. Centipede.

CENTIPEDE: You said it, Mr. Grasshopper.

(YAWNS)

Oh, boy. What I wouldn't do for a cup of coffee.

(GRUNTING)

(GROANING) Cup ofjoe.

I say, old sport. Came to relieve you of your duties.

I said I'd steer the peach. Have to steer the peach.

-(YAWNS) Can't quit now. -Good show, old boy.

(SNORES, GRUNTS)

Thanks, Mr. Grasshopper.

(SNORING)

(VIOLIN PLAYING)

(CENTIPEDE SNORING)

-That music. -Oh, Sir James! Did I disturb you?

So sorry. (STAMMERING) I... I'll put this away.

No, no! I like it.

I used to hear it at my aunts' house before I went to sleep.

That was you, wasn't it?

Or do all grasshoppers play music?

All grasshoppers try.

I'm sure you've heard this.

(LEGS CHIRPING)

Mmm-hmm.

Ghastly, isn't it? Cricket stuff.

-Music should be the voice of the soul. -What does that mean?

It means that when I'm happy, my music sounds like this.

(CLASSICAL UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)

(GROANS)

(MUSIC STOPS)

And when I'm sad, it's like this.

(CLASSICAL SLOW MUSIC PLAYING)

(MUSIC STOPS)

When I was sad, I used to climb in bed with my mum and dad.

But that was a long time ago.

I'm sure they'd be very proud of you, James.

I know we are.

(YAWNING)

(SINGING) Take a little time

Just look at where we are

We've come very, very far

Together

And if I might say so

And if I might say so, too

TOGETHER: We wouldn't have got anywhere

If it weren't for you, boy

Love is the sweetest thing

Love never comes just when you think it will

Love is the way we feel for you

We're family

TOGETHER: We're family

-We're family -All of us

And you

Think of where we'd be

lf we were on our own

We'd be dead.

You're what holds us all together

I am?

And if I might say so

And if we might say so, too

We never could love anyone

As much as we love you

-Love -Is the strangest thing

Love

Does exactly what it wants to do

-Love -Boy, ya know it's true

We're family

We're family Me, me, me, me, me and you

Ashes to ashes

And dust to dust

Without you there'd be no "us"

Love is the sweetest thing

Love does exactly what it wants to do

Love is the way we feel for you

We're family

Me

And you

We'll always be together, won't we?

Kid, you're stuck with us for life.

(FOGHORN SOUNDING)

Look, everybody. We made it!

-We did? -SPIDER: New York City.

-GRASSHOPPER: Breathtaking! -Stunning!

-Oh, how glorious! -Look at the park!

-CENTIPEDE: It's fabulous. -We have made it!

What a wonderful sight!

There's Lady Liberty.

(SNIFFS) I can almost smell the lovely dirt.

-Is it not beautiful? -JAMES: The Empire State Building!

See those lights!

-(CHUCKLING) -Wa-hoo!

Yippee! Attaboy, Jimmy!

Good show, James! The city awaits us.

Now, remember, James. First impression is very important.

(WIND BLOWING)

(SEAGULLS SQUAWKING)

(GRUNTING)

Oh, no!

GRASSHOPPER: We'll be blown off course!

We'll wind up in Jersey!

(THUNDERCLAP)

-Could it be... -No. It couldn't be.

(ROARING)

-It's the rhino! -Oh, James. Do something.

(ROARING)

(THUNDERCLAP)

Everyone, climb up into the rigging!

Hurry!

(SHUDDERING)

James, are you not coming with us?

No! It got my mum and dad.

It won't get my friends!

(THUNDERCLAP)

Come out and show your face, you stupid beast!

(FEROCIOUS ROARING)

(GASPS)

Good God Almighty!

(THUNDERCLAP)

Remember what your parents said, James.

(ROARING)

"Try looking at it another way."

-You're not even a real rhino! -(ROARING)

You're just a lot of smoke and noise!

I'm not afraid of you!

(SNARLING)

(ROARING)

I'm not afraid of you!

ALL: (SCREAMING) James!

No!

(CRASH)

(COUGHING)

(SQUEAKING)

(GROANS)

Miss Spider? Mr. Grasshopper?

Hello? Is anyone there?

(GASPS) (HORNS HONKING)

This isn't right.

Where's the Empire State Building?

(HORNS HONKING)

(GASPING)

What in the...

Officer! There's a boy up there!

What? A boy?

(PANTING) Mabel, we got us a huge, unidentified object here.

-What's it look like? -Round, fuzzy.

It looks sorta like a giant fruit or something.

Well, what is it?

I don't know what it is! Just send us the biggest crane in New York!

(PEOPLE CHATTERING)

Please, sir. How do I get to the Empire State Building?

You're on top of it, kid.

We made it!

(SOLEMNLY) Well, I made it.

(CROWD MURMURING)

Hang on.

(CRANE HOISTING)

Have you seen any big bugs tonight?

Big bugs? How big?

(SIREN WAILING)

I hope they're all right.

(CROWD CHATTERING)

(TRUCK HORN HONKS)

(HONKS)

Let's go. Let's go. Stay back. Stay back.

(CHATTERING CONTINUES)

Don't worry, kid. You'll be all right.

Come on, sonny. Don't be afraid, now. I got ya.

COP: Stay away from the fruit!

-Who's that? Hey! -REPORTER: What is this thing?

-Where you from? -Why you here?

-Who? -What?

-Where? -When?

Hold your fire, fellas!

He's just a kid, for Pete's sake. Here. I got you now.

It's okay, little guy. Nobody's going to hurt ya.

-(HORN HONKING) -Move back for them.

(CAR APPROACHING)

(ENGINE SPUTTERING)

(RATTLING) (AIR HISSING)

(CROWD GASPING)

(GROANS)

(GASPS) No.

(SIGHS)

(CRUNCHING) (GASPS)

Oh! Ah!

Hello, (CHUCKLES)

little angel.

So kind of you to look after our little lost lamb.

Oh.

-Who are you? -We are the boy's legal guardians.

And we've missed him so much.

So we'll just take him home now.

And the peach, of course. We're taking that as well.

Well, wait a minute. Wait, wait, wait. Back up.

You mean to tell me that this thing is a peach?

-It's not "a peach." It's our peach. -Our peach.

-Show him, Spongy. -Yes.

(PANTING)

(GASPS)

-Looks like it's their peach, all right. -Yes.

-Yes, and we're very proud of it. -We're going to be in the record books.

It's not their peach. The old man gave the green things to me.

-That's what made it grow. -How dare you disagree with us?

Patience, sister. Remember his condition.

-His condition? -He's a chronic liar.

Sad, really. He needs his treatment.

Well, that's why we're here, to bring him home.

So you come here with us, eh, lovey!

I'm not the one who's lying. They are!

As you can see, Officer, it is urgent that you release him to us immediately.

Let the boy speak!

-Yeah! -Yeah! Let the boy speak!

(CROWD MURMURING IN AGREEMENT)

All right! All right! All right! Let's get to the bottom of this.

This thing is a peach.

All right. I'll buy that.

Now, does somebody want to tell me how it got here?

We attached it to a hundred seagulls.

(LAUGHING) Seagulls?

That's what happened!

Me and Miss Spider and the Centipede and the old green Grasshopper.

-(CROWD LAUGHING) -I think he's gone mad. (LAUGHING)

This is all something he dreamed up.

Well, maybe it started that way, as a dream, but doesn't everything?

Those buildings, these lights, this whole city!

Somebody had to dream about it first, and maybe that's what I did.

I dreamed about coming here, but then I did it.

-The poor boy needs his medicine. -Yes.

-So we'll just take him... -And the peach.

...back to our cozy, little house on the hill.

Come along. You're going home with us.

No, I'm not.

(SKIN CRACKING)

What did you say?

I said, "No, I'm not!"

I hate that house and that cold room and how I was always hungry.

All right! That's enough!

-And how you beat me! -(GASPS) He's lying!

(CROWD GASPING)

And told me I was nothing!

-Shut up! -Shut up!

-Shut up! -No! Not this time.

(PANTING)

I flew the giant peach across the ocean.

I landed on top of the tallest building in the world.

I made it! I'm not the one who's nothing. You are!

And I'm never going back with you! Not me, and not the peach.

How dare you speak to us this way?

-AUNTS: Ahhh! -(CROWD GASPING)

(SCREAMING)

(WHISTLE BLOWING)

GRASSHOPPER: James! Up here!

GLOWWORM: Hello! We're here!

-CENTIPEDE: Hey, buddy! -What are they?

-GLOWWORM: Young James. -Hey, Jimmy!

Bugs!

CENTIPEDE: Need a little help down there?

-Giant bugs! -(GASPS)

Hey, you old biddies! (BLOWS RASPBERRY)

-Help us! -Whoo-ee! Here we are, dear.

Hello, James!

I told you they were real.

-Hello, old boy. -Requesting clearance to land.

(SEAGULLS SQUAWKING)

(GASPING)

Miss Spider, throw me a string.

(GASPING)

Okay. Pull them up.

SPONGE: Help!

(SCREAMS)

Where are we going?

(HYSTERICAL SCREAMING)

-Spin them around. -You little...

(GASPING)

(SCREAMING)

Wrap them tightly!

(SCREAMING CONTINUES)

Tighter! Tighter!

Well, I'll be a...

The kid was tellin' the truth.

(MUFFLED SHOUTS)

Get those two creeps outta here!

(MUFFLED SCREAMS)

(CROWD CHATTERING)

Stop the presses! I got a new front page!

"Big Bugs In The Big Apple."

In big, bold print, "A Little Lindy Flies Giant Peach."

"Half-Pint Hero And His Peach-Pit Pals."

Everyone, these are my friends,

the ones I've been telling you about.

-Mr. Centipede. -Hi.

-Old green Grasshopper. -My pleasure.

-Earthworm. Mrs. Ladybug. -Charmed.

Miss Spider. And the Glowworm.

God bless the colonies.

-Could we eat some of your peach? -It won't keep forever.

Go ahead.

(CROWD CHEERING)

Hey! What was your name?

It's James.

(CHEERING CONTINUES)

OLD MAN: They ate that peach all the way down to the pit

and set it up in Central Park as a permanent home.

And James Henry Trotter,

who once was the saddest and loneliest little boy you could find,

now had a loving new family,

and all the friends in the world.

James, dinner is ready.

All right. Nearly finished.

And then... And then the seagulls...

OLD MAN: And since James' visitors begged him again and again

to hear the story of his adventure with the giant peach,

he wished for a way to share it with everyone.

And that is exactly what you have just seen.

Once upon a time there was a vulture and a hog

Livin' in a house up on a hill

Had this little boy who lived with them They worked him like a dog

With any luck they'd have him up there still

'Long came a magic man with a magic bag

Full of nasty little green things in a funky old rag

He said, Boy, you may not know it but this here's salvation you see

Son, you're going down in history

Good news is blowin' in your window

Good news is knockin' on your door

Good news is comin' 'round the corner

Good news is rollin' 'round your floor

Where can all my troubles be

Must be good news chasin' me

Good enough to set everybody free

Good news, good news, good news

Good news

There were bugs in the garden Didn't have a clue

But every day their life was on the line

They wanted to get out of there but they didn't know what to do

Their little brains was workin' overtime

-Well -That all changed one sunny day

That little boy dropped by to say

If we all work together we'll make out okay

-We will -Good news, good news, good news

So they rolled down the mountain flew over the sea

Facin' death and danger on their way

But together they have made it

They're where they want to be

They love each other more and more each day

They care about each other

Good news is sweepin' 'cross the country

Good news is spreadin' all around

Good news is hittin' in the city

Good news has sprung up in the town

The things that used to hurt before

They don't hurt 'em anymore

'Cause they know there's somethin' good in store

-Good news -Good news

Good news

-Good news -Comin' down the chimney

-Good news -Knockin' on my door

-Good news -Beamin' through the window

-Good news -Can't take no more

-Good news -Spreadin' o'er the country

-Good news -For the young and old

-Good news -Goin' round the world now

-Good news -lt's too hot to hold back

-Comin' down the chimney -Good news

-lt's knockin' on the door -Good news

-Beamin' through the window -Good news

-Can't take no more -Good news

-Spreadin' o'er the country -Good news

-For the young and old -Good news

-Goin' 'round the world -Good news

-Too hot to hold -Good news

-Good news -Good news

Good news

-Good news -Good news

(BELL DINGS)

(BELL RINGING)

(BUZZER SOUNDING)