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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,625 --> 00:00:03,503 [♪ intriguing instrumental music] 2 00:00:20,853 --> 00:00:22,563 [ringing] 3 00:00:22,563 --> 00:00:24,899 {\an8}- Yeah! - [whoops] 4 00:00:24,899 --> 00:00:28,194 {\an8}Five shots in a row! Take that, list item number 75. 5 00:00:28,194 --> 00:00:29,529 {\an8}You're a natural! 6 00:00:29,529 --> 00:00:33,074 {\an8}Natural? That took you 102 tries! 7 00:00:33,074 --> 00:00:35,785 {\an8}- [basketball bouncing] - Hey hey, Hailey Banks-shot! 8 00:00:35,785 --> 00:00:37,745 {\an8}- [winces] - [glass shattering] 9 00:00:37,745 --> 00:00:38,913 [groans] 10 00:00:38,913 --> 00:00:41,749 Thanks for letting us use the Master Arcade Card your mom gave you. 11 00:00:41,749 --> 00:00:44,711 It's so weird, I still can't figure out where my card went. 12 00:00:44,711 --> 00:00:45,795 Huh, yeah. 13 00:00:45,795 --> 00:00:47,714 So weird. 14 00:00:47,714 --> 00:00:49,882 But hey, it's time for me to collect my money. 15 00:00:49,882 --> 00:00:51,259 - Money? - Whose-a what now? 16 00:00:51,259 --> 00:00:54,053 I know. Ugh, I hate this part, too! 17 00:00:54,053 --> 00:00:55,555 It's all in the back of the card. 18 00:00:56,889 --> 00:00:58,349 [Hailey] Terms are legally binding? 19 00:00:58,349 --> 00:01:01,561 Let's see. 102 games at a $1.50 a game, 20 00:01:01,561 --> 00:01:04,897 plus sales tax, state tax, income tax, and shipping fees... 21 00:01:04,897 --> 00:01:07,650 That means you owe me an even three hundo! 22 00:01:07,775 --> 00:01:10,486 $300? Are you for serious? 23 00:01:10,486 --> 00:01:11,779 Serious as a bite wound! 24 00:01:11,779 --> 00:01:15,033 Which my snapping turtle, Mr. Chompers, has been known to inflict on people 25 00:01:15,033 --> 00:01:16,951 who don't pay me in a timely fashion. 26 00:01:16,951 --> 00:01:19,370 I'd hate if he chomped you. 27 00:01:19,370 --> 00:01:20,788 You guys are like family. 28 00:01:20,788 --> 00:01:22,206 I am family. 29 00:01:22,206 --> 00:01:25,209 And it's only fair that until I'm paid back, 30 00:01:25,209 --> 00:01:27,086 I hold onto something of yours. 31 00:01:27,086 --> 00:01:29,005 - Hey! Not Beta! - [Becker] Don't worry. 32 00:01:29,005 --> 00:01:32,008 Mr. Chompers will keep him company. [laughs] 33 00:01:32,008 --> 00:01:34,802 Hoo boy. We need money, and fast! 34 00:01:34,802 --> 00:01:36,095 Scott. I think we need... 35 00:01:36,095 --> 00:01:37,597 - [♪ dramatic music] - ...jobs. 36 00:01:37,597 --> 00:01:39,140 - Jobs? - [both groan] 37 00:01:42,352 --> 00:01:44,020 - When. - [grunts] 38 00:01:44,896 --> 00:01:46,856 {\an8}Hey mom, could you hire us? 39 00:01:46,856 --> 00:01:48,274 {\an8}To, like, work? 40 00:01:48,274 --> 00:01:50,818 {\an8}Honestly, kiddo? I'm looking to fire, not hire. 41 00:01:50,818 --> 00:01:51,986 {\an8}- [crashing] - Darryl! 42 00:01:51,986 --> 00:01:56,532 The ice cream goes in the cone, not the other way around! 43 00:01:57,867 --> 00:02:00,119 I'd never pay you to work for me anyway. 44 00:02:00,119 --> 00:02:01,746 I'd expect you to do that for free. 45 00:02:01,746 --> 00:02:03,039 You're like family! 46 00:02:03,039 --> 00:02:05,166 I am family. What is this? 47 00:02:05,166 --> 00:02:07,919 Sorry to eavesdrop. I mean, not in a weird way! 48 00:02:07,919 --> 00:02:10,505 Although, my son always tells me I'm a big weirdo. 49 00:02:10,505 --> 00:02:11,714 [chuckles] 50 00:02:11,839 --> 00:02:13,591 You're not a weirdo, Gretchen. 51 00:02:13,591 --> 00:02:15,885 [in strange accent] How about now? 52 00:02:15,885 --> 00:02:17,387 [laughing] 53 00:02:17,387 --> 00:02:19,972 {\an8}Anyway, I'm hiring at my store. 54 00:02:19,972 --> 00:02:22,350 {\an8}Mind you, they're just temporary positions. 55 00:02:22,350 --> 00:02:24,769 {\an8}- Fine by us. - We only wanna work temporarily. 56 00:02:24,769 --> 00:02:27,105 {\an8}Great! Hope I see you there. 57 00:02:28,022 --> 00:02:30,942 Fans Plus? Where have we heard that before? 58 00:02:32,402 --> 00:02:34,404 Hello, Hailey Banks. 59 00:02:34,904 --> 00:02:36,280 [sighs] Hi, A.C. 60 00:02:36,280 --> 00:02:39,200 Gretchen mentioned you'd be stopping by. 61 00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:40,576 Hi, gang! 62 00:02:40,576 --> 00:02:43,079 Isn't my sweetie weetie A.C. just the best? 63 00:02:43,079 --> 00:02:44,163 [both chuckling] 64 00:02:44,163 --> 00:02:45,832 Mom! [grunts] 65 00:02:45,832 --> 00:02:46,999 [yells] 66 00:02:46,999 --> 00:02:49,001 Gretchen! [grunts] Stop being a weirdo! 67 00:02:49,001 --> 00:02:50,962 Right. [chuckles nervously] That's me. 68 00:02:50,962 --> 00:02:53,297 And remember, you can call me Mom. 69 00:02:54,298 --> 00:02:56,676 [groans] Anyway. 70 00:02:56,676 --> 00:02:59,512 Behold my empire! 71 00:02:59,512 --> 00:03:03,182 One day, every fan in this place will be mine! 72 00:03:03,182 --> 00:03:04,767 All mine! 73 00:03:05,393 --> 00:03:06,394 [laughs maniacally] 74 00:03:06,394 --> 00:03:08,729 [groans] 75 00:03:10,606 --> 00:03:12,400 Oh, what the beans! 76 00:03:14,277 --> 00:03:16,028 So, you guys are hiring? 77 00:03:16,028 --> 00:03:19,574 We are. But don't get ahead of yourself, Failey Banks. 78 00:03:19,574 --> 00:03:22,660 You'd have some very large shoes to fill. 79 00:03:22,660 --> 00:03:23,744 [Hailey] Aww! 80 00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:26,706 I mean, wow! Huge. 81 00:03:26,706 --> 00:03:29,208 - [Gretchen] That's Mommy's big boy! - Gretchen. 82 00:03:29,208 --> 00:03:31,043 You're mom-barrassing me! 83 00:03:31,043 --> 00:03:32,712 [clears throat] As I was saying, 84 00:03:32,712 --> 00:03:37,300 today we are filming the first ever Fans Plus commercial. 85 00:03:37,300 --> 00:03:38,634 I don't think you were saying-- 86 00:03:38,634 --> 00:03:42,138 We have the hottest director in the local commercial business 87 00:03:42,138 --> 00:03:43,723 and, spoiler alert, 88 00:03:43,723 --> 00:03:45,183 I'm the star. 89 00:03:45,308 --> 00:03:47,894 So, should we deem you Fans Plus material, 90 00:03:47,894 --> 00:03:52,148 we'd need you to cover my vital position as Regional Surplus Vice-Manager. 91 00:03:52,148 --> 00:03:53,524 [Gretchen] He's the stock boy! 92 00:03:53,649 --> 00:03:56,694 Gretchen! If I need you, I will ring the Gretchen bell. 93 00:03:56,694 --> 00:03:58,571 - [bell rings] - You rang? 94 00:03:58,571 --> 00:04:00,740 No, that was for demonstration only! 95 00:04:01,866 --> 00:04:04,160 [scoffs] The job interview starts now. 96 00:04:04,494 --> 00:04:08,039 Hello. I'm Ronald, a clueless customer, and this is a role play. 97 00:04:08,039 --> 00:04:12,168 What's the blade size of a four-turbine oscillating floor fan, hmm? 98 00:04:12,168 --> 00:04:15,755 - Um, small? - Wrong! It's over 7.25 inches! 99 00:04:15,755 --> 00:04:17,006 Wait, how do you know that? 100 00:04:17,006 --> 00:04:19,008 I thought you said you're a clueless customer. 101 00:04:19,008 --> 00:04:22,011 Your story seems to change a lot, Ronald, 102 00:04:22,011 --> 00:04:23,804 if that's even your real name. 103 00:04:23,804 --> 00:04:25,139 Ronald's name tag says "A.C."! 104 00:04:25,139 --> 00:04:28,267 Yeah! Yes, but in this role play, my name is-- 105 00:04:28,267 --> 00:04:29,477 Let's cut to the chase. 106 00:04:29,477 --> 00:04:31,187 Are you a spy sent from Fan World? 107 00:04:31,187 --> 00:04:32,772 You guys have no shame. 108 00:04:32,772 --> 00:04:35,441 What? No. Stop this! Start it over. 109 00:04:35,441 --> 00:04:38,361 Hello. I'm an average customer who buys three to four fans a week-- 110 00:04:38,361 --> 00:04:40,112 That's 200 fans a year! 111 00:04:40,112 --> 00:04:41,447 Do you, like, make the wind? 112 00:04:41,447 --> 00:04:43,157 I'm just here to buy a fan! 113 00:04:43,157 --> 00:04:44,450 Well, why didn't you say so? 114 00:04:44,450 --> 00:04:46,118 - [clapping] - Right this way, Ronald. 115 00:04:46,118 --> 00:04:48,120 Wonderful job, gang. You're hired. 116 00:04:48,120 --> 00:04:50,456 What? No, no! We need to start over! 117 00:04:50,456 --> 00:04:51,832 [door slams open] 118 00:04:51,832 --> 00:04:53,543 [♪ funky instrumental music] 119 00:04:56,921 --> 00:04:59,632 Hello, Sam. I mean, uh, Mr. Rodriguez. 120 00:04:59,632 --> 00:05:03,594 May I just say, your latest masterpiece was a triumph. 121 00:05:03,594 --> 00:05:05,137 You should see my director's cut. 122 00:05:05,137 --> 00:05:09,600 It's three and a half hours long and will change your life. 123 00:05:09,600 --> 00:05:14,230 Oh, um, I was talking about the Smoothie Shack commercial with the burping cow? 124 00:05:14,230 --> 00:05:15,356 So was I. 125 00:05:15,982 --> 00:05:17,942 [A.C.] Oh, of course you were. [clears throat] 126 00:05:17,942 --> 00:05:21,404 Anyways, I was thinking we could start our Fans Plus commercial by-- 127 00:05:21,404 --> 00:05:23,322 As I said when you hired me, 128 00:05:23,322 --> 00:05:25,741 I must have complete creative control. 129 00:05:25,741 --> 00:05:27,952 I let the story find itself... [yells] 130 00:05:27,952 --> 00:05:30,329 Well, yes, but I'm your leading man. 131 00:05:30,329 --> 00:05:33,124 The face of Fans Plus! 132 00:05:33,583 --> 00:05:36,627 Fine. I trained a cow to burp, so I can work with anyone. 133 00:05:36,627 --> 00:05:37,920 Isn't that right, Maurice? 134 00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:39,922 [slurping] 135 00:05:39,922 --> 00:05:41,007 [burps] 136 00:05:41,007 --> 00:05:42,675 He's my cameraman now. 137 00:05:42,675 --> 00:05:45,052 - Well, now I've seen it all. - [phone vibrating] 138 00:05:45,052 --> 00:05:46,596 - Hey, Beta. - [Beta on call] Hailey! 139 00:05:46,596 --> 00:05:48,472 I am in grave danger. 140 00:05:48,472 --> 00:05:51,475 I'm locked up with an insane turtle! 141 00:05:51,475 --> 00:05:55,062 You gotta get me out. This guy is an absolute maniac! 142 00:05:55,062 --> 00:05:56,272 [grunts] 143 00:05:57,148 --> 00:05:58,983 [gasps] He's closing in! 144 00:05:58,983 --> 00:06:00,901 Please tell me you have Becker's money. 145 00:06:00,901 --> 00:06:03,904 [Hailey] We're working on it. You're just gonna have to hang in there. 146 00:06:03,904 --> 00:06:04,989 [♪ dramatic music] 147 00:06:04,989 --> 00:06:06,782 [Beta] Attack! 148 00:06:10,328 --> 00:06:14,123 May my demise be swift and painless. 149 00:06:15,666 --> 00:06:18,961 - I'll take a flan! - [Sam] Cut! 150 00:06:18,961 --> 00:06:20,546 A.C., you did it again. 151 00:06:20,546 --> 00:06:22,131 You said "flan" instead of "fan!" 152 00:06:22,131 --> 00:06:24,050 I did? [chuckles nervously] That's weird. 153 00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:27,136 I could have sworn I said flan... I mean, flan. 154 00:06:27,136 --> 00:06:28,554 I mean, flan! 155 00:06:28,554 --> 00:06:30,014 Flan! Flan! Flan! 156 00:06:30,014 --> 00:06:31,098 Oh, what the beans? 157 00:06:31,098 --> 00:06:33,643 Please stop flailing your arms. 158 00:06:33,643 --> 00:06:34,977 [inhales] 159 00:06:34,977 --> 00:06:37,897 Remember, acting is reacting. 160 00:06:37,897 --> 00:06:40,066 Close your eyes and do what I say. 161 00:06:40,066 --> 00:06:41,192 Be a seed. 162 00:06:41,192 --> 00:06:42,485 Grow into a flower. 163 00:06:42,485 --> 00:06:46,364 Float down a river. Feel the river. Become a crocodile. 164 00:06:46,364 --> 00:06:47,698 Eat the flower. 165 00:06:47,823 --> 00:06:49,158 Now crush its dreams. 166 00:06:49,158 --> 00:06:51,619 - And scream! - [screams] 167 00:06:51,619 --> 00:06:53,579 Yes! Yes! That's it! 168 00:06:53,579 --> 00:06:55,039 Maurice, roll camera! 169 00:06:55,039 --> 00:06:57,541 And, action! 170 00:06:58,167 --> 00:07:00,252 I'll take a... 171 00:07:00,252 --> 00:07:03,089 Wait, am I the flower or a crocodile? 172 00:07:03,089 --> 00:07:04,757 Cut, cut, cut! 173 00:07:04,757 --> 00:07:07,301 [grunts in frustration] 174 00:07:07,301 --> 00:07:08,469 [slurps] 175 00:07:10,096 --> 00:07:13,641 {\an8}[voice vibrating] DJ Double Deuce in the house! 176 00:07:13,641 --> 00:07:16,519 {\an8}Dropping another one! 177 00:07:16,519 --> 00:07:21,691 I'm Windy Feathers out here reporting live from a hurricane! 178 00:07:21,691 --> 00:07:23,109 [mimics robot] I am a robot. 179 00:07:23,109 --> 00:07:26,862 I wish to know human emotions. 180 00:07:26,862 --> 00:07:30,449 I'm melting! Melting... 181 00:07:30,449 --> 00:07:34,120 ♪ Fish skin Za za za za za za ♪ 182 00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:35,496 [both laugh] 183 00:07:36,455 --> 00:07:37,957 Amazing. 184 00:07:37,957 --> 00:07:40,876 The electricity between you two is simply edible. 185 00:07:40,876 --> 00:07:43,587 It's that classic old Hollywood chemistry. 186 00:07:43,587 --> 00:07:47,216 Like Bogart and Hepburn, or Maurice and his banana-oat smoothie. 187 00:07:49,009 --> 00:07:50,469 This project needs you. 188 00:07:50,469 --> 00:07:52,847 Please say you'll be in the commercial. 189 00:07:52,847 --> 00:07:53,931 - Sure. - Okay. 190 00:07:53,931 --> 00:07:55,725 Whoa, whoa, whoa whoa! We were doing fine! 191 00:07:55,725 --> 00:07:57,893 I just needed to warm up a little, is all. 192 00:07:57,893 --> 00:08:00,896 Don't worry. I have the perfect role for you. 193 00:08:00,896 --> 00:08:04,900 A.C., can you move three steps back and to the left? 194 00:08:05,484 --> 00:08:06,652 More. 195 00:08:07,486 --> 00:08:08,696 A little more. 196 00:08:09,530 --> 00:08:10,614 Little more. 197 00:08:11,323 --> 00:08:12,658 Little more. 198 00:08:13,075 --> 00:08:14,368 [objects clattering] 199 00:08:14,368 --> 00:08:16,078 [A.C.] I'm in the supply closet! 200 00:08:16,078 --> 00:08:17,288 [Sam] Perfect! 201 00:08:17,288 --> 00:08:18,372 From the top. 202 00:08:18,372 --> 00:08:21,792 But this time, I'll have my new attractive stars say the line. Action! 203 00:08:22,752 --> 00:08:25,045 - Come on down... - To Fans Plus! 204 00:08:25,045 --> 00:08:26,130 [Sam] Cut! 205 00:08:26,130 --> 00:08:27,339 Poetry. 206 00:08:27,339 --> 00:08:30,342 You two are the new faces of Fans Plus. 207 00:08:30,342 --> 00:08:32,511 [sobbing] 208 00:08:32,511 --> 00:08:34,180 I'll be in my trailer. 209 00:08:35,431 --> 00:08:37,266 [♪ somber instrumental music] 210 00:08:39,935 --> 00:08:41,979 Hey, Sam, can I talk to you? 211 00:08:45,107 --> 00:08:47,193 [Hailey] Uh, I think you're supposed to blow it. 212 00:08:47,193 --> 00:08:48,986 I blew it all right. 213 00:08:48,986 --> 00:08:52,740 And what do you want, to rub it in my handsome, handsome face? 214 00:08:52,740 --> 00:08:54,450 I just wanted to say sorry, A.C. 215 00:08:54,450 --> 00:08:56,869 I didn't mean to take the lead role in your commercial. 216 00:08:56,869 --> 00:08:58,037 Commercials are lame! 217 00:08:58,037 --> 00:09:00,623 I was honestly doing Sam a favor. 218 00:09:00,623 --> 00:09:03,292 Fans are pretty lame, too, right? 219 00:09:03,292 --> 00:09:05,169 How dare you? 220 00:09:05,169 --> 00:09:06,962 Fans are not lame! 221 00:09:06,962 --> 00:09:10,424 A room without a fan is like a song without music, 222 00:09:10,424 --> 00:09:12,551 a sky without sun! 223 00:09:12,551 --> 00:09:16,430 Sure, you all can have your so-called great loves, 224 00:09:16,430 --> 00:09:19,558 your girlfriends, your boyfriends, your plus-ones, 225 00:09:19,558 --> 00:09:21,977 but when push comes to shove, 226 00:09:21,977 --> 00:09:24,271 I'll take a fan! 227 00:09:25,231 --> 00:09:27,316 [Sam] Cut! [claps] 228 00:09:28,943 --> 00:09:29,944 What's going on? 229 00:09:29,944 --> 00:09:32,071 We got it. Incredible. 230 00:09:32,071 --> 00:09:35,825 A.C., you were so raw and real! 231 00:09:35,825 --> 00:09:37,785 Oh, that's why it was easy. 232 00:09:37,785 --> 00:09:40,329 You know, acting is really just reacting. 233 00:09:40,871 --> 00:09:43,624 It was really nice of you to set that up with Sam. 234 00:09:43,624 --> 00:09:47,503 - That's my big superstar boy! - Hey. Gretchen! [grunts] 235 00:09:47,753 --> 00:09:52,758 [Sam] Welcome, all, to the world premiere of my Fans Plus commercial. 236 00:09:52,758 --> 00:09:55,636 Once in a generation, art is created 237 00:09:55,636 --> 00:09:58,430 that changes the very nature of commercials. 238 00:09:58,430 --> 00:09:59,765 [shushes] Here it comes! 239 00:09:59,765 --> 00:10:01,475 If you or a loved one has been injured 240 00:10:01,475 --> 00:10:03,269 {\an8}in a Honey Doo-related bear attack, 241 00:10:03,269 --> 00:10:06,939 {\an8}contact the law offices of Graci, Gulino, and Cortez today! 242 00:10:06,939 --> 00:10:10,818 [Hailey and Scott repeating] Fans! 243 00:10:10,818 --> 00:10:12,278 [in slo-mo] Fans! 244 00:10:12,278 --> 00:10:13,988 [both repeating] Fans... 245 00:10:13,988 --> 00:10:15,698 - Plus. - [♪ upbeat music playing] 246 00:10:15,698 --> 00:10:18,784 [♪ dramatic music playing] 247 00:10:18,784 --> 00:10:20,327 [slurping] 248 00:10:21,704 --> 00:10:24,123 [grunts] A.C., I am so-- 249 00:10:24,123 --> 00:10:27,751 That was so brilliant! 250 00:10:27,751 --> 00:10:29,545 Did you hear the way I said "Plus?" 251 00:10:29,545 --> 00:10:30,754 On TV! 252 00:10:30,754 --> 00:10:34,300 Oh, my fan legacy is etched in stone forever! 253 00:10:34,300 --> 00:10:35,467 Did you see it, Mommy? 254 00:10:35,467 --> 00:10:37,845 You did great, schmookems! 255 00:10:37,845 --> 00:10:39,471 Thank you, both for your help 256 00:10:39,471 --> 00:10:42,224 and for being such great friends to my special boy. 257 00:10:42,224 --> 00:10:43,976 Here are your paychecks. 258 00:10:43,976 --> 00:10:45,519 Don't be a stranger. 259 00:10:46,770 --> 00:10:48,022 [♪ upbeat instrumental music] 260 00:10:48,022 --> 00:10:50,649 Yoink! Consider your debt paid. 261 00:10:50,649 --> 00:10:52,192 And here's your doll back. 262 00:10:52,192 --> 00:10:55,195 Mr. Chompers is really gonna miss him. 263 00:10:55,195 --> 00:10:57,114 Beta! You survived! 264 00:10:57,114 --> 00:10:59,408 I need a screen wipe and a nap. 265 00:10:59,408 --> 00:11:02,995 [shudders] I never wanna see another animal again! 266 00:11:02,995 --> 00:11:06,373 [screams] Too soon! [yells] 267 00:11:06,373 --> 00:11:07,666 Too soon! 268 00:11:08,584 --> 00:11:10,711 [Hailey singing] ♪ The future's in my hands ♪ 269 00:11:10,711 --> 00:11:12,046 {\an8}♪ World's what you make it ♪ 270 00:11:12,046 --> 00:11:13,631 {\an8}♪ Get up and chase it ♪ 271 00:11:13,631 --> 00:11:15,716 {\an8}♪ Leaving nothing to chance ♪ 272 00:11:15,716 --> 00:11:18,344 {\an8}♪ I'm taking action, making it happen ♪ 273 00:11:18,344 --> 00:11:20,930 {\an8}♪ No matter what tomorrow might bring ♪ 274 00:11:20,930 --> 00:11:23,724 {\an8}♪ I got the guts to do anything ♪ 275 00:11:23,724 --> 00:11:25,935 {\an8}♪ The future's in my hands ♪ 276 00:11:25,935 --> 00:11:27,478 ♪ Promise, I'm on it ♪ 277 00:11:27,478 --> 00:11:28,812 ♪ I'm on it ♪ 278 00:11:28,812 --> 00:11:30,981 {\an8}♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪ 279 00:11:31,106 --> 00:11:33,525 - [chorus] ♪ Hey, hey, hey! ♪ - [Hailey] ♪ Hailey's on it! ♪ 280 00:11:33,525 --> 00:11:36,528 {\an8}- [chorus] ♪ Hey, hey! ♪ - [Hailey] ♪ Hailey's on it! ♪ 20473

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