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1
00:00:01,802 --> 00:00:03,604
(both laughing)
JUDY: Oh!
2
00:00:03,637 --> 00:00:06,274
Boys, we have very
exciting news.
3
00:00:06,307 --> 00:00:08,276
We bought burial plots.
4
00:00:08,309 --> 00:00:10,778
For all of us.
5
00:00:10,811 --> 00:00:11,845
Burial plots?
6
00:00:11,879 --> 00:00:13,781
I don't want to think
about this. It's too sad.
7
00:00:13,814 --> 00:00:17,251
But what's even sadder
is not having planned ahead
8
00:00:17,285 --> 00:00:20,154
and having to go
to the bad part of the cemetery
9
00:00:20,188 --> 00:00:21,589
like poor Uncle Murray.
10
00:00:21,622 --> 00:00:22,723
JUDY:
Oh, his plot
11
00:00:22,756 --> 00:00:24,258
was so far away
from the parking lot,
12
00:00:24,292 --> 00:00:27,061
even if we had liked him,
we didn't want to visit.
13
00:00:27,095 --> 00:00:29,297
So, what, you met
with an estate planner?
14
00:00:29,330 --> 00:00:31,732
No, no. I got
a pop-up advertisement
15
00:00:31,765 --> 00:00:34,102
and got a great deal
on the plots.
Mm-hmm.
16
00:00:34,135 --> 00:00:35,269
It just popped up.
17
00:00:35,303 --> 00:00:36,604
Yeah, I saw it happen.
18
00:00:36,637 --> 00:00:38,606
It wasn't there, and
then, pop, it was.
19
00:00:38,639 --> 00:00:39,807
HARRY:
And we now have
20
00:00:39,840 --> 00:00:43,611
four gorgeous plots
under a big oak tree.
21
00:00:43,644 --> 00:00:45,113
Four plots?
What about Eve?
22
00:00:45,146 --> 00:00:46,814
Wha... Hmm?
23
00:00:46,847 --> 00:00:48,582
And what about
my future wife
24
00:00:48,616 --> 00:00:49,750
who I hope to
meet someday?
25
00:00:49,783 --> 00:00:52,286
Josh, you tried marriage.
It didn't work.
26
00:00:52,320 --> 00:00:54,088
Just be buried with your mother.
27
00:00:54,122 --> 00:00:55,756
No, thank you.
Not doing it.
28
00:00:55,789 --> 00:00:59,093
Come on, you guys could spoon
for all eternity.
29
00:00:59,127 --> 00:01:00,494
Okay, you know what?
30
00:01:00,528 --> 00:01:02,630
I was here, and then,
pop, I wasn't.
31
00:01:04,598 --> 00:01:06,367
I guess that means Eve is in.
(door closes)
32
00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:08,169
Well, Harry, try
to be positive.
33
00:01:08,202 --> 00:01:09,770
Josh may still
wind up alone
34
00:01:09,803 --> 00:01:11,705
and want to join us.
35
00:01:13,141 --> 00:01:15,343
Okay. Feel better, buddy.
36
00:01:15,376 --> 00:01:18,112
I'm so sorry, sis; I can't go
to the concert with you now.
37
00:01:18,146 --> 00:01:19,213
Why not?
38
00:01:19,247 --> 00:01:20,714
'Cause Ernesto has a mouth rash,
39
00:01:20,748 --> 00:01:23,784
which is extra nasty because
we share a whistle.
40
00:01:23,817 --> 00:01:26,220
So, how about you just give me
the tickets to the concert,
41
00:01:26,254 --> 00:01:27,555
and I'll go with someone else?
42
00:01:27,588 --> 00:01:29,157
Like who?
43
00:01:29,190 --> 00:01:30,624
Don't worry, not a guy.
44
00:01:30,658 --> 00:01:31,892
I'll call Debbie.
45
00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:33,394
Ooh, Fat Debbie
or Skinny Debbie?
46
00:01:33,427 --> 00:01:34,895
Fat Debbie.
47
00:01:34,928 --> 00:01:36,730
Ooh, tell her
I said "what up."
48
00:01:36,764 --> 00:01:38,466
(elevator bell dings)
49
00:01:38,499 --> 00:01:40,634
All right,
I'll see you in a minute.
Okay.
50
00:01:40,668 --> 00:01:42,870
Okay.
Well, well, well.
51
00:01:42,903 --> 00:01:46,307
Look at my man getting
some sweet action.
52
00:01:46,340 --> 00:01:48,209
Oh, no, no, no, no.
See, that's...
Don't "oh, no, no" me.
53
00:01:48,242 --> 00:01:50,711
You dish it out when
I'm with a girl.
54
00:01:50,744 --> 00:01:54,582
So, did you feel like a pirate
when you plundered that booty?
55
00:01:54,615 --> 00:01:57,485
That was my sister.
56
00:01:57,518 --> 00:01:58,919
I did not know that
was your sister.
57
00:01:58,952 --> 00:02:01,355
If I had, I wouldn't
have mentioned her booty,
58
00:02:01,389 --> 00:02:03,624
and certainly not
your plundering of it.
59
00:02:03,657 --> 00:02:05,159
NICK: Yeah. Yeah.
JOSH: So sorry.
60
00:02:05,193 --> 00:02:07,228
Well, Debbie can't go
to the concert.
61
00:02:07,261 --> 00:02:08,496
Just as well.
62
00:02:08,529 --> 00:02:11,165
The seats at the arena
are pretty narrow.
63
00:02:11,199 --> 00:02:13,867
Oh, Josh, uh,
this is my sister, Toni.
64
00:02:13,901 --> 00:02:15,703
Toni, this is Josh.
He lives in the building.
65
00:02:15,736 --> 00:02:17,438
With his parents.
66
00:02:18,772 --> 00:02:20,408
Next to my parents. Hi.
67
00:02:20,441 --> 00:02:21,842
Hi.
I was supposed to take Toni
68
00:02:21,875 --> 00:02:23,511
to see Chance The Rapper,
but, uh,
69
00:02:23,544 --> 00:02:25,246
I got to stay
and cover for Ernesto.
70
00:02:25,279 --> 00:02:27,181
Ah, so I guess you
missed your chance
71
00:02:27,215 --> 00:02:28,682
to see the rapper.
72
00:02:28,716 --> 00:02:30,884
Lame wordplay's
not gonna help, Josh.
73
00:02:30,918 --> 00:02:32,220
Well...
74
00:02:32,253 --> 00:02:34,188
But, um, would you step
75
00:02:34,222 --> 00:02:35,389
into the office really quick?
Sure.
76
00:02:35,423 --> 00:02:37,325
Okay.
Hey, so, you're...
77
00:02:37,358 --> 00:02:38,559
you're an upstanding guy.
78
00:02:38,592 --> 00:02:39,893
Right? Uh, do you think
79
00:02:39,927 --> 00:02:41,895
that maybe you could take
Toni to the concert?
80
00:02:41,929 --> 00:02:44,898
Oh. Uh, well, actually,
I don't have plans tonight.
81
00:02:44,932 --> 00:02:48,202
Shocking.
Look.
82
00:02:48,236 --> 00:02:49,970
You'd really be helping me out.
I'd feel a lot better if I knew
83
00:02:50,003 --> 00:02:51,439
someone I trusted
is with her.
84
00:02:51,472 --> 00:02:53,674
Uh, yeah, sure.
I'd be happy to take her.
85
00:02:53,707 --> 00:02:54,842
Ay, yo, Tone.
86
00:02:54,875 --> 00:02:55,943
Your big brother
just got you
87
00:02:55,976 --> 00:02:57,778
a plus-one for the show.
88
00:02:57,811 --> 00:02:59,647
And I will be that plus-one.
89
00:03:01,282 --> 00:03:03,784
* La, la, la, la,
la, la, la, la, la *
90
00:03:03,817 --> 00:03:06,320
* Come on,
won't you take me home? *
91
00:03:13,994 --> 00:03:16,864
Your parents
bought us burial plots?
92
00:03:16,897 --> 00:03:19,400
Yes. And I know what you're
gonna say, but don't worry.
93
00:03:19,433 --> 00:03:20,234
I'll take the one
next to my mother.
94
00:03:20,268 --> 00:03:22,570
Consider it
my parting gift to you.
95
00:03:22,603 --> 00:03:24,405
That's very nice
in a morbid kind of way,
96
00:03:24,438 --> 00:03:25,839
but I'm getting cremated.
97
00:03:25,873 --> 00:03:27,241
Cremated?
98
00:03:27,275 --> 00:03:29,343
Yeah. Told you that.
No, you haven't.
99
00:03:29,377 --> 00:03:30,944
Yes, I have. It's something
that I've always wanted.
100
00:03:30,978 --> 00:03:32,813
Other kids wanted
to play in the ocean,
101
00:03:32,846 --> 00:03:35,649
I wanted to have my ashes
spread in it.
102
00:03:35,683 --> 00:03:37,918
So you can be run over
by a cruise ship
103
00:03:37,951 --> 00:03:40,254
or sucked into a Jet Ski?
104
00:03:40,288 --> 00:03:44,258
The ocean is just so free
and peaceful. Ooh.
105
00:03:44,292 --> 00:03:45,693
Maybe if Wyatt
dumps me in Malibu,
106
00:03:45,726 --> 00:03:48,362
James Franco will
swim in me.
107
00:03:48,396 --> 00:03:50,831
We should be buried.
That way there's a place
108
00:03:50,864 --> 00:03:53,867
for our son and various
other admirers to mourn us.
109
00:03:53,901 --> 00:03:56,770
And they're going to
mourn hard.
110
00:03:56,804 --> 00:03:59,340
Andrew, you know
I'm claustrophobic.
111
00:03:59,373 --> 00:04:00,974
I can't stand the
thought of being close
112
00:04:01,008 --> 00:04:02,976
to all that dirt
and bugs and...
113
00:04:03,010 --> 00:04:05,346
your mother.
114
00:04:05,379 --> 00:04:07,448
Forget about her.
We can be buried anywhere.
115
00:04:07,481 --> 00:04:10,050
The point is
we're together forever.
116
00:04:10,083 --> 00:04:12,453
Oh, babe, that's so sweet.
117
00:04:12,486 --> 00:04:15,022
But maybe we go with what
the guy at our wedding said.
118
00:04:15,055 --> 00:04:17,458
Remember? "Till
death do you part."
119
00:04:17,491 --> 00:04:18,659
I took that as a question.
120
00:04:18,692 --> 00:04:20,694
"Do you part?"
No, you don't.
121
00:04:20,728 --> 00:04:23,297
So get cremated with me.
122
00:04:23,331 --> 00:04:25,999
I don't even like
to be under a heat lamp.
123
00:04:29,537 --> 00:04:32,373
Well, Nick must
really trust you.
124
00:04:32,406 --> 00:04:34,475
He didn't text me once
during the show.
125
00:04:34,508 --> 00:04:35,509
Oh, he usually does?
126
00:04:35,543 --> 00:04:37,978
Oh, yeah. Like, if I had gone
with Debbie tonight,
127
00:04:38,011 --> 00:04:40,614
he would have been all like,
"Don't drink too much.
128
00:04:40,648 --> 00:04:42,383
"Don't talk to any guys.
129
00:04:42,416 --> 00:04:45,819
Ay, hit me with a picture
of Debbie's butt."
(laughs)
130
00:04:45,853 --> 00:04:47,788
Believe me, I understand
131
00:04:47,821 --> 00:04:50,090
having a relative who
loves you way too much.
132
00:04:50,123 --> 00:04:51,625
Oh, that's right.
133
00:04:51,659 --> 00:04:53,361
You live with your parents.
134
00:04:53,394 --> 00:04:55,696
Next to. They're very happy
135
00:04:55,729 --> 00:04:57,665
that I just moved back
here from Los Angeles.
136
00:04:57,698 --> 00:05:00,100
Well, one of my girlfriends
just got a job in San Francisco.
137
00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:01,969
She wants me to go with her.
138
00:05:02,002 --> 00:05:03,737
Oh, my God.
San Francisco's great.
139
00:05:03,771 --> 00:05:05,606
Well, Nick doesn't think
I should do it.
140
00:05:05,639 --> 00:05:08,376
You know, I know
how you feel.
141
00:05:08,409 --> 00:05:10,944
My mother has always gotten
way too involved in my life,
142
00:05:10,978 --> 00:05:13,381
but I reached a point where
I just put my foot down.
143
00:05:13,414 --> 00:05:14,948
(phone vibrates)
144
00:05:14,982 --> 00:05:17,084
And of course, that's her.
145
00:05:17,117 --> 00:05:18,752
Uh, she gets nervous
if I don't answer.
146
00:05:18,786 --> 00:05:19,953
Mmm.
147
00:05:19,987 --> 00:05:21,455
What, Mom?
148
00:05:21,489 --> 00:05:23,824
Yes, I will bring home
vanilla ice cream.
149
00:05:23,857 --> 00:05:25,125
Good-bye.
150
00:05:25,158 --> 00:05:27,495
Foot's not totally down,
but it's getting there.
151
00:05:28,829 --> 00:05:30,731
*
152
00:05:30,764 --> 00:05:33,434
Eve doesn't
want the plot.
153
00:05:33,467 --> 00:05:34,802
Why?
Apparently,
154
00:05:34,835 --> 00:05:36,370
she's getting cremated.
155
00:05:36,404 --> 00:05:37,438
When?
156
00:05:39,407 --> 00:05:42,109
So, I guess it's just the
three of us down there.
157
00:05:42,142 --> 00:05:44,845
Well, what are we gonna do
with the extra plot?
158
00:05:44,878 --> 00:05:46,146
We could give it to my mother.
159
00:05:46,179 --> 00:05:48,649
Over my dead body.
160
00:05:48,682 --> 00:05:51,419
Well, yeah.
161
00:05:51,452 --> 00:05:53,120
Maybe you could sell it.
162
00:05:53,153 --> 00:05:56,156
I don't want to spend eternity
next to somebody I don't know.
163
00:05:56,189 --> 00:05:57,658
Well, how about
to one of your friends.
164
00:05:57,691 --> 00:05:59,527
Just not the one
who used to kiss me
165
00:05:59,560 --> 00:06:02,496
with that scraggly mustache--
I don't like her.
166
00:06:02,530 --> 00:06:04,432
A friend is a good idea,
167
00:06:04,465 --> 00:06:07,100
but it would be much easier
to move a pair.
168
00:06:07,134 --> 00:06:09,470
We don't have a pair;
we have Andrew.
169
00:06:09,503 --> 00:06:11,071
But if we didn't have Andrew...
170
00:06:14,742 --> 00:06:16,710
You have got to
be kidding me.
171
00:06:16,744 --> 00:06:18,712
Are you seriously
kicking me out?
172
00:06:18,746 --> 00:06:20,748
Only if we could sell the plots.
173
00:06:20,781 --> 00:06:23,717
Great. Now no one wants
to be buried with me.
174
00:06:23,751 --> 00:06:25,619
*
175
00:06:25,653 --> 00:06:27,054
So, even though
my parents
176
00:06:27,087 --> 00:06:28,922
really wanted me to
go to law school,
177
00:06:28,956 --> 00:06:30,791
I chose to become
an actor,
178
00:06:30,824 --> 00:06:32,460
and I've never
regretted it.
179
00:06:32,493 --> 00:06:34,528
Except for the part where
my show got canceled
180
00:06:34,562 --> 00:06:36,196
and I now live
next to my parents.
181
00:06:36,229 --> 00:06:39,166
It's really brave of you
to just go for it.
182
00:06:39,199 --> 00:06:42,503
I know I'm gonna regret
not going to San Francisco.
183
00:06:42,536 --> 00:06:43,904
Well, then you should go.
184
00:06:43,937 --> 00:06:45,739
I mean, if you
want something,
185
00:06:45,773 --> 00:06:47,741
you've got to go get it.
186
00:06:47,775 --> 00:06:50,143
You know, I wasn't sure
about going to a concert
187
00:06:50,177 --> 00:06:53,213
with someone I didn't know,
but... this has been great.
188
00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:55,115
Well, I'm just
glad I could...
189
00:06:58,251 --> 00:07:00,153
(laughs):
Whoa. Uh...
190
00:07:00,187 --> 00:07:01,822
I did not see
that coming.
191
00:07:01,855 --> 00:07:04,191
Well, you said if I
really want something,
192
00:07:04,224 --> 00:07:05,893
I should go get it.
193
00:07:05,926 --> 00:07:07,828
I did, but I
didn't mean...
194
00:07:07,861 --> 00:07:09,162
I...
195
00:07:09,196 --> 00:07:11,198
We can't do this.
196
00:07:11,231 --> 00:07:14,702
Oh, my God.
I'm so embarrassed.
No, no, no, don't be.
197
00:07:14,735 --> 00:07:17,237
No, I completely
misread that vibe.
No, you didn't, you didn't.
198
00:07:17,270 --> 00:07:20,040
It's just... you're
Nick's sister.
199
00:07:20,073 --> 00:07:22,710
And if I wasn't?
200
00:07:22,743 --> 00:07:24,745
Well... then yeah.
201
00:07:24,778 --> 00:07:26,547
Of course.
202
00:07:26,580 --> 00:07:28,181
So you're seeing
something you really want?
203
00:07:28,215 --> 00:07:30,017
Yeah.
204
00:07:30,050 --> 00:07:32,553
Then go get it.
205
00:07:33,887 --> 00:07:35,556
You know what?
206
00:07:35,589 --> 00:07:37,257
It's not just that you
want to be cremated.
207
00:07:37,290 --> 00:07:39,226
Oh, cool.
We're still on this.
208
00:07:39,259 --> 00:07:42,062
It is that we are supposed
to be a team.
209
00:07:42,095 --> 00:07:43,597
We are a team.
210
00:07:43,631 --> 00:07:46,099
We're married.
We have a child together.
211
00:07:46,133 --> 00:07:49,002
We split a tuna melt
like it's nobody's business.
212
00:07:49,036 --> 00:07:51,271
It isn't anybody's business--
I do not want it to get out
213
00:07:51,304 --> 00:07:52,773
that I can't finish
my own tuna melt.
214
00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:54,207
The cremation thing
215
00:07:54,241 --> 00:07:56,276
bothers me,
because it's an example
216
00:07:56,309 --> 00:07:59,913
of how you can be...
a bit of a lone wolf.
217
00:07:59,947 --> 00:08:03,617
I prefer to think of myself
as "delightfully independent."
218
00:08:03,651 --> 00:08:05,819
It's one of the things
you fell in love with.
219
00:08:05,853 --> 00:08:07,688
You were a refreshing
change of pace
220
00:08:07,721 --> 00:08:09,156
from my previous girlfriends.
221
00:08:09,189 --> 00:08:12,259
God, those girls
made me miserable.
(laughs)
222
00:08:12,292 --> 00:08:14,828
And I make you happy.
223
00:08:14,862 --> 00:08:17,030
So come on, can we just...
224
00:08:17,064 --> 00:08:19,032
cuddle on the couch
and watch TV
225
00:08:19,066 --> 00:08:21,034
and forget
all this death talk?
226
00:08:21,068 --> 00:08:24,004
Yes. Yes, we can.
Okay.
227
00:08:24,037 --> 00:08:26,273
And don't forget-- we
have the season finale
228
00:08:26,306 --> 00:08:28,275
of Handmaid's Tale
to watch.
229
00:08:30,077 --> 00:08:32,045
Why does it say...
230
00:08:32,079 --> 00:08:34,014
"resume watching"?
231
00:08:34,047 --> 00:08:35,616
You were working late
last night,
232
00:08:35,649 --> 00:08:37,317
and there was
nothing else on.
233
00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:40,588
There was nothing else
on 7,000 channels?
234
00:08:40,621 --> 00:08:42,723
Relax, it's just a TV show.
235
00:08:42,756 --> 00:08:45,325
This, this is a
perfect example
236
00:08:45,358 --> 00:08:47,995
of how you do things
without considering me.
237
00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:49,797
Oh, come on--
name one other time
238
00:08:49,830 --> 00:08:51,632
I didn't consider you.
239
00:08:51,665 --> 00:08:54,301
Uh, how about the time we
went scuba diving in Aruba
240
00:08:54,334 --> 00:08:57,838
and you drove the boat back
to shore before I'd come up?
241
00:08:57,871 --> 00:09:00,641
Well, that was before we
were married and had a child.
242
00:09:00,674 --> 00:09:02,643
I am a different person now.
243
00:09:02,676 --> 00:09:04,144
All right. Fine.
244
00:09:04,177 --> 00:09:06,113
Let's just eat dinner.
245
00:09:06,146 --> 00:09:08,315
I already ate.
246
00:09:10,250 --> 00:09:12,219
*
(knocking)
247
00:09:12,252 --> 00:09:15,155
Uh, Mom, I'm a little
busy right now.
248
00:09:15,188 --> 00:09:17,090
Hey, there he is!
(forced chuckle)
249
00:09:17,124 --> 00:09:19,760
I bought you some
thank-you muffins.
For what?
250
00:09:19,793 --> 00:09:21,328
For taking care
of my sister last night.
251
00:09:21,361 --> 00:09:23,631
Yeah, you got it. Look,
right now is not a good time.
252
00:09:23,664 --> 00:09:25,633
Oh, no, while I'm here,
let me take a look
253
00:09:25,666 --> 00:09:26,967
at that leaky faucet
in the bathroom, man.
254
00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:28,669
No, bathroom's broken.
Toilet's clogged.
255
00:09:28,702 --> 00:09:30,738
I'm embarrassed.
Oh, man, I'm not scared.
256
00:09:30,771 --> 00:09:32,673
You seen the type of things
I pulled out of toilets--
257
00:09:32,706 --> 00:09:34,107
diapers, ferrets--
ooh, this one time, I had...
258
00:09:34,141 --> 00:09:35,609
No, and I would
take you up...
TONI: Josh?
259
00:09:35,643 --> 00:09:37,645
The shower's hot and so am I.
260
00:09:37,678 --> 00:09:39,713
Oh, my damn!
261
00:09:40,814 --> 00:09:42,015
No, you...
262
00:09:42,049 --> 00:09:43,350
Oh, my damn!
263
00:09:43,383 --> 00:09:45,185
Wait, what are you
doing here, Toni?
264
00:09:45,218 --> 00:09:47,020
What's she doing here, Josh?!
Okay, after the show,
265
00:09:47,054 --> 00:09:48,388
we were having pizza
and we were talking
266
00:09:48,421 --> 00:09:50,123
about stuff,
and it just kind of happened.
267
00:09:50,157 --> 00:09:51,391
Oh, "just kind of happened,"
just like that.
268
00:09:51,424 --> 00:09:52,826
"It just kind of happened!"
269
00:09:52,860 --> 00:09:54,027
Yes, it just kind of...
Nick, I'm a grown-up.
270
00:09:54,061 --> 00:09:55,262
I can take care
of myself.
271
00:09:55,295 --> 00:09:56,664
I wanted to do this.
272
00:09:56,697 --> 00:09:59,032
(retches)
273
00:09:59,066 --> 00:10:01,168
I'm-a be sick.
Hold on.
274
00:10:01,201 --> 00:10:03,671
(retches) I'm gonna throw up,
I'm gonna throw up.
275
00:10:03,704 --> 00:10:05,138
What's all this commotion?
276
00:10:05,172 --> 00:10:06,840
Josh slept with my sister!
277
00:10:06,874 --> 00:10:08,642
(gasps)
Man, I can't believe
you would have
278
00:10:08,676 --> 00:10:10,143
a one-night stand
with my sister.
279
00:10:10,177 --> 00:10:11,278
Nick, it's wasn't
a one-night stand.
280
00:10:11,311 --> 00:10:12,279
We're having dinner tonight.
281
00:10:12,312 --> 00:10:14,381
Oh, yeah, yeah, well,
we gonna see about that.
282
00:10:14,414 --> 00:10:16,349
He did nothing wrong,
and neither did I.
283
00:10:16,383 --> 00:10:18,151
You know what?
This isn't over.
284
00:10:18,185 --> 00:10:21,154
Not to overstate the obvious,
but I know where you live.
285
00:10:27,427 --> 00:10:31,198
Would we want to be buried
with Dave and Susie Wiseman?
286
00:10:31,231 --> 00:10:33,300
Oh, please. I can barely
get through a meal with them,
287
00:10:33,333 --> 00:10:35,769
let alone the afterlife.
288
00:10:35,803 --> 00:10:38,038
Oh, I know.
The Borensteins.
289
00:10:38,071 --> 00:10:39,907
Well, the Borensteins
would be a fine idea
290
00:10:39,940 --> 00:10:41,942
if they weren't both
already dead.
291
00:10:41,975 --> 00:10:45,412
I'm notifying
my Rolodex.
292
00:10:45,445 --> 00:10:48,682
Oh, this is good.
Ira and Enid Reiger.
293
00:10:48,716 --> 00:10:50,317
I like it!
Yeah.
294
00:10:50,350 --> 00:10:53,821
Their son's a florist, and we'll
be swimming in fresh flowers.
295
00:10:53,854 --> 00:10:55,088
Plus they give
a lot to charity,
296
00:10:55,122 --> 00:10:58,091
and we could use
a little of that karma.
297
00:10:58,125 --> 00:10:59,860
(elevator bell dings)
298
00:11:03,296 --> 00:11:05,733
Nick, look, I'm really sorry
about what happened, but I...
299
00:11:05,766 --> 00:11:07,334
Hey, no apology necessary.
300
00:11:07,367 --> 00:11:09,336
Let's just go back
to our original relationship
301
00:11:09,369 --> 00:11:13,173
as employee and
building resident who sucks.
302
00:11:13,206 --> 00:11:15,843
Fine. Did I get
a package today?
303
00:11:15,876 --> 00:11:17,077
You did.
304
00:11:17,110 --> 00:11:20,714
(glass clinking)
305
00:11:20,748 --> 00:11:23,350
Okay. Thank you.
306
00:11:23,383 --> 00:11:24,918
Mm-hmm.
307
00:11:27,755 --> 00:11:29,356
Hey.
308
00:11:29,389 --> 00:11:30,490
Hey. Where you been?
309
00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:32,726
Oh, just sitting by an ice patch
310
00:11:32,760 --> 00:11:35,729
watching douchey investment
bankers slip and fall.
311
00:11:35,763 --> 00:11:39,499
You did our favorite date
night activity without me?
312
00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:42,269
Should I not have done that?
313
00:11:42,302 --> 00:11:44,504
Because I also went
and picked up a cupcake
314
00:11:44,537 --> 00:11:46,439
from our favorite place
on the way home.
315
00:11:46,473 --> 00:11:48,909
Let me guess.
You did not get me one.
316
00:11:48,942 --> 00:11:50,744
I did not.
317
00:11:50,778 --> 00:11:52,512
I guess I failed
to consider you.
318
00:11:52,545 --> 00:11:54,848
That must feel terrible.
319
00:11:54,882 --> 00:11:57,517
I know what you're doing,
and it's not gonna work.
320
00:11:57,550 --> 00:11:59,086
I'm not mad.
321
00:11:59,119 --> 00:12:01,521
Damn it, Eve,
if cupcakes
322
00:12:01,554 --> 00:12:04,457
and people falling doesn't
get a rise out of you,
323
00:12:04,491 --> 00:12:06,526
we might as well
just cremate you now
324
00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:08,028
'cause you're already dead.
325
00:12:08,061 --> 00:12:09,462
We have been over this.
326
00:12:09,496 --> 00:12:11,331
I'm just independent.
327
00:12:11,364 --> 00:12:12,365
You're too independent.
328
00:12:12,399 --> 00:12:14,301
You live your life
like you're on your own island.
329
00:12:14,334 --> 00:12:15,769
Married people
do things together.
330
00:12:15,803 --> 00:12:17,470
They decide things together.
331
00:12:17,504 --> 00:12:21,041
They eat and watch TV
and are buried together.
332
00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:24,211
It sounds like you want us to
be suffocatingly codependent.
333
00:12:24,244 --> 00:12:27,380
At this point,
I would love that!
334
00:12:28,882 --> 00:12:30,884
*
335
00:12:30,918 --> 00:12:33,153
(whoosh, soft thud)
336
00:12:43,997 --> 00:12:46,834
NICK: Please forgive us
for this temporary delay.
337
00:12:46,867 --> 00:12:48,902
What?
What is happening here?
338
00:12:48,936 --> 00:12:51,504
We are experiencing
technical difficulties.
339
00:12:51,538 --> 00:12:54,374
(sighs)
Come on, Nick.
340
00:12:54,407 --> 00:12:57,210
While you wait,
please enjoy this hold music.
341
00:12:57,244 --> 00:12:58,979
* Doo, doo, doo, doo
342
00:12:59,012 --> 00:13:00,547
Nick?
(Nick continues vocalizing)
343
00:13:00,580 --> 00:13:02,349
* Doo-doo-doo-doo, doo-doo
Nick?!
344
00:13:02,382 --> 00:13:04,918
(continues vocalizing)
345
00:13:04,952 --> 00:13:06,486
Nick, what's your plan here?
346
00:13:06,519 --> 00:13:08,822
Y-You gonna keep me trapped
in this elevator forever?
347
00:13:08,856 --> 00:13:10,323
I don't know.
I'm a millennial.
348
00:13:10,357 --> 00:13:12,392
I don't plan ahead.
349
00:13:12,425 --> 00:13:14,427
Do you really want your sister
sitting there
350
00:13:14,461 --> 00:13:16,463
in the restaurant alone
waiting for me?
351
00:13:16,496 --> 00:13:19,166
She won't be. I already texted
her that you're not coming,
352
00:13:19,199 --> 00:13:20,834
and she was pissed.
353
00:13:22,903 --> 00:13:25,238
Oh, Joshy, Joshy, Josh, Josh.
354
00:13:25,272 --> 00:13:27,841
You know you get no cell service
in the elevator.
355
00:13:27,875 --> 00:13:29,176
It's like a dropped pass.
356
00:13:29,209 --> 00:13:31,611
No reception. Bye.
Nick? Nick?
357
00:13:31,644 --> 00:13:34,081
(stammers): Nick? Nick?
(phone clicks)
358
00:13:34,114 --> 00:13:35,916
*
359
00:13:35,949 --> 00:13:38,318
Oh, it's so nice to see you.
360
00:13:38,351 --> 00:13:40,020
You both look wonderful.
361
00:13:40,053 --> 00:13:44,191
Enid, you should get
your hips replaced more often.
362
00:13:44,224 --> 00:13:47,260
(chuckles) I've gotten back
into rhythmic gymnastics.
363
00:13:47,294 --> 00:13:49,296
Oh.
Which works for me.
364
00:13:49,329 --> 00:13:50,898
(both laugh)
365
00:13:50,931 --> 00:13:53,500
Seriously, we're
so glad you called.
366
00:13:53,533 --> 00:13:55,335
It's-it's been forever.
367
00:13:55,368 --> 00:13:57,437
Oh, speaking
of forever...
368
00:13:57,470 --> 00:13:58,972
Well,
369
00:13:59,006 --> 00:14:00,607
we actually invited you over
370
00:14:00,640 --> 00:14:03,977
to make you
a rather delicate proposal.
371
00:14:04,011 --> 00:14:06,947
We're choosing you
out of all the couples we know
372
00:14:06,980 --> 00:14:10,550
because we feel
we have a certain compatibility.
373
00:14:10,583 --> 00:14:12,419
What we're trying
to ask is...
Yes,
374
00:14:12,452 --> 00:14:14,988
we'll have a foursome
with you.
375
00:14:16,957 --> 00:14:18,091
(laughs)
376
00:14:18,125 --> 00:14:20,427
What?
377
00:14:20,460 --> 00:14:22,062
You mean for bridge?
378
00:14:22,095 --> 00:14:25,098
No, Harry,
the sex kind.
379
00:14:25,132 --> 00:14:27,100
Oh.
380
00:14:27,134 --> 00:14:29,436
They're perverts.
381
00:14:31,004 --> 00:14:33,240
We were going to ask you
382
00:14:33,273 --> 00:14:35,675
if you wanted
to buy two burial plots.
383
00:14:35,708 --> 00:14:39,579
Oh. Well, we already
bought our plots,
384
00:14:39,612 --> 00:14:42,382
but thank you.
385
00:14:42,415 --> 00:14:44,451
Well, okay.
386
00:14:44,484 --> 00:14:47,620
We'll see you
around the neighborhood.
387
00:14:47,654 --> 00:14:50,157
Uh, good luck with
the burial plots.
388
00:14:50,190 --> 00:14:53,426
Oh. Good luck with...
your thing.
389
00:14:58,031 --> 00:14:59,699
Oh. Hey, Ernesto.
390
00:14:59,732 --> 00:15:01,401
Señor.
391
00:15:01,434 --> 00:15:03,136
Ian, where's Nick?
392
00:15:03,170 --> 00:15:05,005
I thought
he was working tonight.
393
00:15:05,038 --> 00:15:07,307
He was, but he was so upset,
he went home.
394
00:15:07,340 --> 00:15:09,542
Toni called and said she's gonna
move to San Francisco.
395
00:15:09,576 --> 00:15:11,511
Huh.
396
00:15:11,544 --> 00:15:12,980
All thanks to you.
397
00:15:13,013 --> 00:15:15,048
Hey, I just gave her
a little advice.
398
00:15:15,082 --> 00:15:16,649
That's not how Nick sees it.
399
00:15:16,683 --> 00:15:19,319
As far as he's concerned, you
bought her a first-class ticket
400
00:15:19,352 --> 00:15:21,054
and gave her a ride
to the airport.
401
00:15:21,088 --> 00:15:23,123
I got to go talk to him.
402
00:15:26,626 --> 00:15:29,062
Hey.
403
00:15:29,096 --> 00:15:33,166
I thought about it, and if
it's that important to you,
404
00:15:33,200 --> 00:15:35,168
we can be buried together.
405
00:15:35,202 --> 00:15:37,170
What made you
change your mind?
406
00:15:37,204 --> 00:15:39,439
Well, I felt bad
that I made you feel bad,
407
00:15:39,472 --> 00:15:42,009
so I went to J. Crew
to buy you a present.
408
00:15:42,042 --> 00:15:43,743
What did you get me?
409
00:15:43,776 --> 00:15:45,545
A sweater dress, strappy heels
410
00:15:45,578 --> 00:15:48,148
and a bunch of other stuff
that looks great on me.
411
00:15:50,117 --> 00:15:51,284
Andrew, you're right.
412
00:15:51,318 --> 00:15:52,752
Sometimes I don't consider you.
413
00:15:52,785 --> 00:15:54,554
Uh, yeah.
414
00:15:54,587 --> 00:15:56,123
And I want us
to be a team,
415
00:15:56,156 --> 00:15:58,091
so let's be buried together.
416
00:15:58,125 --> 00:16:00,527
And what about the dirt
and the bugs and my mother?
417
00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:02,595
To be honest,
only one of those things
418
00:16:02,629 --> 00:16:04,597
really gives me the creeps.
419
00:16:04,631 --> 00:16:09,336
Well, I appreciate the
offer, but let's compromise.
420
00:16:09,369 --> 00:16:11,038
You still get cremated,
421
00:16:11,071 --> 00:16:13,373
but we sprinkle half
of you in the ocean...
Mm.
422
00:16:13,406 --> 00:16:15,542
...and the other half
on my grave.
423
00:16:15,575 --> 00:16:17,777
Deal. I love you.
424
00:16:17,810 --> 00:16:20,413
I love you, too.
425
00:16:22,549 --> 00:16:25,085
All right, let's watch the
next episode of Ray Donovan.
426
00:16:25,118 --> 00:16:26,319
Oh.
427
00:16:26,353 --> 00:16:29,222
(clears throat)
428
00:16:29,256 --> 00:16:31,624
You already watched
it, didn't you?
429
00:16:31,658 --> 00:16:34,094
Yup.
430
00:16:34,127 --> 00:16:36,029
*
431
00:16:36,063 --> 00:16:38,098
(knocking)
432
00:16:38,131 --> 00:16:40,200
(train cars rattling
in distance)
433
00:16:43,070 --> 00:16:45,538
What you here for,
to make a move on my pet turtle?
434
00:16:49,342 --> 00:16:51,344
I just wanted to talk.
435
00:16:51,378 --> 00:16:53,046
Mm. Talking is how
it started with Toni.
436
00:16:53,080 --> 00:16:55,048
Should I be worried?
437
00:16:55,082 --> 00:16:58,385
Nick, I don't think this is
really about me and your sister.
438
00:16:58,418 --> 00:17:01,054
Yeah, it is.
What I mean is, I think
there's a bigger issue here.
439
00:17:01,088 --> 00:17:03,323
She decided to move, Josh,
thanks to you.
440
00:17:03,356 --> 00:17:05,658
She's an adult who
made her own decision.
441
00:17:05,692 --> 00:17:07,660
(sniffles)
442
00:17:07,694 --> 00:17:09,429
And, look,
she'll be fine.
443
00:17:09,462 --> 00:17:12,165
She's smart and strong
and totally capable.
444
00:17:12,199 --> 00:17:14,134
Yeah, and I worked hard
to make sure of that.
445
00:17:14,167 --> 00:17:16,669
What do you mean?
446
00:17:16,703 --> 00:17:20,173
After we lost my dad,
my mom had to work two,
447
00:17:20,207 --> 00:17:22,142
sometimes three jobs
to support us.
448
00:17:22,175 --> 00:17:24,344
And I had to step up
and look out for Toni.
449
00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:26,346
(scoffs)
450
00:17:26,379 --> 00:17:30,150
Man, the proudest day of my life
was her college graduation.
451
00:17:30,183 --> 00:17:32,452
And that's why you shouldn't
be upset she's moving.
452
00:17:32,485 --> 00:17:34,121
You should still be proud
453
00:17:34,154 --> 00:17:36,256
that she's brave enough to
do this, and-and psyched
454
00:17:36,289 --> 00:17:39,092
that you get to watch all
the great things she'll do.
455
00:17:40,160 --> 00:17:42,162
Yeah, maybe.
456
00:17:42,195 --> 00:17:44,197
You, like, won, dude.
457
00:17:44,231 --> 00:17:47,066
You don't want her to resent you
for standing in her way, do you?
458
00:17:48,835 --> 00:17:49,669
Nah, maybe I should, uh...
459
00:17:49,702 --> 00:17:51,804
Maybe I should stop
being so protective.
460
00:17:51,838 --> 00:17:55,175
And like a parent,
you have to let go.
461
00:17:55,208 --> 00:17:57,544
Like your parents?
462
00:17:58,778 --> 00:18:03,216
No, like normal parents.
463
00:18:03,250 --> 00:18:05,352
You know, maybe a...
464
00:18:05,385 --> 00:18:07,587
maybe a change of scenery,
you know,
465
00:18:07,620 --> 00:18:09,622
wouldn't be the worst thing
for Toni.
466
00:18:09,656 --> 00:18:13,493
And then, uh, I'd have a reason
to go visit her in Cali,
467
00:18:13,526 --> 00:18:16,363
and I, for one, think
I would do very nicely
468
00:18:16,396 --> 00:18:17,897
with the California girls.
(laughs)
469
00:18:17,930 --> 00:18:20,633
No doubt. No doubt.
470
00:18:20,667 --> 00:18:22,502
(laughs)
Yeah.
471
00:18:22,535 --> 00:18:24,604
So we good?
472
00:18:24,637 --> 00:18:28,275
Yeah, we're good, man.
473
00:18:28,308 --> 00:18:30,277
Cool.
474
00:18:30,310 --> 00:18:32,445
Hey, is this your mom?
Wow.
475
00:18:32,479 --> 00:18:34,781
Where does it stop
for you?
No, no, no. I was...
476
00:18:34,814 --> 00:18:36,649
I want this picture down.
Put it down.
Okay. Okay.
477
00:18:41,921 --> 00:18:43,390
Oh, that's wonderful, Elaine.
478
00:18:43,423 --> 00:18:44,791
See you soon. Bye.
479
00:18:44,824 --> 00:18:47,527
Elaine Karchmer is in
for one plot.
480
00:18:47,560 --> 00:18:49,896
She never married.
481
00:18:49,929 --> 00:18:52,899
That's right. No man
could stand her.
Ah.
482
00:18:52,932 --> 00:18:55,768
Looks like Andrew's back in.
483
00:18:55,802 --> 00:18:58,438
Just e-mailed him.
484
00:18:58,471 --> 00:19:01,608
That's good. A boy should
stay close to his mother.
485
00:19:01,641 --> 00:19:04,911
So, I watched some
videos of foursomes,
486
00:19:04,944 --> 00:19:08,281
and I don't think
we're flexible enough.
487
00:19:08,315 --> 00:19:10,817
A threesome I understand,
but four?
488
00:19:10,850 --> 00:19:14,454
I wouldn't even know
who would put what where.
489
00:19:14,487 --> 00:19:18,625
There are just some things we
will never do in this lifetime.
490
00:19:18,658 --> 00:19:20,827
But we've done a lot,
haven't we, Harry?
491
00:19:20,860 --> 00:19:22,329
We sure have.
492
00:19:22,362 --> 00:19:24,497
You have any regrets?
493
00:19:24,531 --> 00:19:26,366
(sighs)
494
00:19:26,399 --> 00:19:29,869
Only that I can't go back and
do it all over again with you.
495
00:19:31,871 --> 00:19:34,274
Me, too.
496
00:19:35,542 --> 00:19:36,876
Hi, guys. So,
497
00:19:36,909 --> 00:19:38,978
I've been thinking a lot
about family,
498
00:19:39,011 --> 00:19:40,947
and if the plot's
still available...
499
00:19:40,980 --> 00:19:43,816
(gasps)
...I'll take it.
500
00:19:43,850 --> 00:19:45,818
Oh, Joshy,
that's wonderful.
501
00:19:45,852 --> 00:19:48,755
Hey, I just got the e-mail.
I'm back in?
502
00:19:50,990 --> 00:19:53,860
You have got to be kidding me!
503
00:20:00,900 --> 00:20:06,839
Captioning sponsored by
CBS
504
00:20:06,873 --> 00:20:08,841
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org
505
00:20:08,875 --> 00:20:11,244
* La, la, la, la,
la, la, la, la, la *
506
00:20:11,278 --> 00:20:13,713
* La, la, la, la, la,
la, la, la, la *
507
00:20:13,746 --> 00:20:16,283
* La, la, la, la,
la, la, la, la, la *
508
00:20:16,316 --> 00:20:18,217
* Come on,
won't you take me home? *
36903
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