Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:03,737 --> 00:00:05,439
Hi, Nick.
2
00:00:05,473 --> 00:00:08,142
Dang, Mrs. Roberts, you got
that pre-vacation glow.
3
00:00:08,176 --> 00:00:10,578
(chuckles)
Thank you, Nicholas.
4
00:00:10,611 --> 00:00:12,480
Someone just upped
his holiday bonus.
5
00:00:12,513 --> 00:00:14,315
Oh, no, no, no, I don't
do it for the tips.
6
00:00:14,348 --> 00:00:16,584
Sexy just recognize sexy.
7
00:00:16,617 --> 00:00:18,619
Where are you and Mr. Roberts
off to this weekend?
8
00:00:18,652 --> 00:00:20,721
Oh, we're celebrating
our anniversary at a resort
9
00:00:20,754 --> 00:00:23,124
in Connecticut
I've been wanting to go to.
10
00:00:23,157 --> 00:00:25,493
I hear Barbra Streisand
goes there.
11
00:00:25,526 --> 00:00:27,828
I don't know who that is.
12
00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:30,498
I'll make you a cassette.
13
00:00:30,531 --> 00:00:32,833
I don't know what that is.
14
00:00:32,866 --> 00:00:36,237
I'm ready to go.
(coughing)
Wow, Mr. Roberts,
15
00:00:36,270 --> 00:00:39,540
you look like the first ten
seconds of a NyQuil commercial.
16
00:00:39,573 --> 00:00:40,741
I'm fine.
17
00:00:40,774 --> 00:00:42,243
He's fine.
18
00:00:42,276 --> 00:00:44,845
I could be sick here
or I could be sick there.
19
00:00:44,878 --> 00:00:47,315
Yeah, you can be sick there--
it's nonrefundable.
20
00:00:47,348 --> 00:00:49,383
Here's a little health tip:
mix decongestant
21
00:00:49,417 --> 00:00:52,253
and a little bit of whiskey,
knock that cold right on out.
22
00:00:52,286 --> 00:00:54,122
Oh, it'll also
give you the energy
23
00:00:54,155 --> 00:00:55,589
to record your first
album in one night.
24
00:00:55,623 --> 00:00:56,824
Available on my website.
25
00:00:59,327 --> 00:01:01,729
(coughing)
Hey, Nick. Who's ready for
their big anniversary?
26
00:01:01,762 --> 00:01:03,264
Whoa.
27
00:01:03,297 --> 00:01:04,665
Dad, are you okay?
28
00:01:04,698 --> 00:01:06,500
I'm fine.
He's fine.
29
00:01:06,534 --> 00:01:08,336
I've seen fine and this is not
what it looks like.
30
00:01:08,369 --> 00:01:10,838
Out of the way. Professional
doctor coming through.
31
00:01:10,871 --> 00:01:12,806
Okay, let me see
your tongue.
32
00:01:14,308 --> 00:01:15,476
Oh, boy.
What we have here
33
00:01:15,509 --> 00:01:18,279
is a little seasonal influenza.
34
00:01:18,312 --> 00:01:20,814
Wow, that very
obvious diagnosis
35
00:01:20,848 --> 00:01:24,418
only cost Dad 150 grand
in med school bills.
36
00:01:24,452 --> 00:01:27,655
You need to stay in bed
and drink plenty of fluids.
37
00:01:27,688 --> 00:01:30,624
What if he stays in the car
and I park by the sprinklers?
38
00:01:30,658 --> 00:01:32,326
I'm sorry, Dad,
39
00:01:32,360 --> 00:01:34,862
there is absolutely no way
you can travel.
40
00:01:34,895 --> 00:01:37,665
But Mommy's wanted to go to
this place for ten years.
41
00:01:37,698 --> 00:01:40,201
It's all right, I'll go
in another ten years.
42
00:01:40,234 --> 00:01:42,336
You can spread
my ashes there.
43
00:01:42,370 --> 00:01:47,308
I can't believe that I've ruined
this weekend for your mom.
44
00:01:47,341 --> 00:01:48,876
Dad, it's not your
fault you got sick.
45
00:01:48,909 --> 00:01:51,345
Mommy says it is.
46
00:01:51,379 --> 00:01:53,781
Ugh. If only there was someone
who could take your place.
47
00:01:53,814 --> 00:01:56,184
Someone who doesn't
have a job, love life,
48
00:01:56,217 --> 00:01:59,587
or any other commitments to
prevent him from joining her.
49
00:02:00,654 --> 00:02:02,556
No. No. No way.
50
00:02:02,590 --> 00:02:05,393
No, I am not going on vacation
alone with my mother.
51
00:02:05,426 --> 00:02:07,428
But, Josh,
it'll make her so happy,
52
00:02:07,461 --> 00:02:10,164
and it'll make me feel
less guilty.
53
00:02:10,198 --> 00:02:12,433
Come on, Josh, this
could be his last wish.
54
00:02:13,734 --> 00:02:15,603
I thought it was just the flu.
55
00:02:15,636 --> 00:02:18,406
Do you want him to go or not?
Josh, please.
56
00:02:18,439 --> 00:02:21,275
It's my last wish.
57
00:02:22,276 --> 00:02:23,277
Oh, okay.
58
00:02:23,311 --> 00:02:25,446
Okay, fine, I will do it. Mom?
59
00:02:25,479 --> 00:02:28,616
What now? Are they closing
my favorite Chico's?
No.
60
00:02:28,649 --> 00:02:31,252
I was just wondering
if I could take Dad's place
61
00:02:31,285 --> 00:02:33,287
and join you on your vacation.
62
00:02:33,321 --> 00:02:37,258
Oh, sweetie, that's okay,
I know you're busy.
63
00:02:37,291 --> 00:02:38,959
No, no, no,
we've already debunked that.
64
00:02:38,992 --> 00:02:41,429
Really, Mom.
I want to go.
65
00:02:41,462 --> 00:02:43,264
No. You don't have to.
66
00:02:43,297 --> 00:02:44,732
Okay, if you really
don't want me...
67
00:02:44,765 --> 00:02:46,367
I'll meet you downstairs.
Yeah.
68
00:02:46,400 --> 00:02:47,768
Uh, bro, you
know how when
69
00:02:47,801 --> 00:02:50,638
you go on a weekend with
a chick, I want all the details?
70
00:02:50,671 --> 00:02:52,340
Yeah, this is not
one of those times.
71
00:02:53,874 --> 00:02:56,644
* La, la, la, la,
la, la, la, la, la *
72
00:02:56,677 --> 00:02:59,247
* Come on,
won't you take me home? *
73
00:03:05,286 --> 00:03:08,222
Oh, look at this place--
it's gorgeous.
74
00:03:08,256 --> 00:03:10,324
Hi.
Hey.
75
00:03:10,358 --> 00:03:12,293
JUDY: Hello.
Welcome to Cabot Hill Inn.
76
00:03:12,326 --> 00:03:15,263
And whom do I have the pleasure
of checking in today?
77
00:03:15,296 --> 00:03:16,397
It should be under Roberts.
78
00:03:16,430 --> 00:03:18,332
Uh, yes.
Mr. and Mrs. Roberts.
79
00:03:18,366 --> 00:03:20,901
Uh, technically yes, but
obviously we're not...
80
00:03:20,934 --> 00:03:22,703
Oh, no judgments here--
actually,
81
00:03:22,736 --> 00:03:24,004
it's quite refreshing to see
82
00:03:24,037 --> 00:03:26,374
an older woman
with a younger man for once.
83
00:03:26,407 --> 00:03:27,708
Well, thank you.
84
00:03:27,741 --> 00:03:29,009
Why would you say
"thank you"?
85
00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:30,311
She's my mother.
86
00:03:30,344 --> 00:03:31,745
Yes, she is.
87
00:03:31,779 --> 00:03:32,880
Get it, girl.
88
00:03:32,913 --> 00:03:34,315
(chuckles)
89
00:03:34,348 --> 00:03:36,984
I have you for two nights
in a garden view room.
90
00:03:37,017 --> 00:03:38,786
May I escort
the lovely couple?
Mm-hmm.
91
00:03:38,819 --> 00:03:40,321
We're not a couple.
92
00:03:40,354 --> 00:03:43,291
(whispers): I don't
like labels, either.
93
00:03:43,324 --> 00:03:46,360
Um, what the hell is this?
94
00:03:47,828 --> 00:03:50,298
It's all part of
your Lovers Package.
95
00:03:50,331 --> 00:03:51,265
Our what?
96
00:03:51,299 --> 00:03:53,734
Harry must have booked this
to surprise me.
97
00:03:53,767 --> 00:03:56,304
Some guests have been known
to repurpose the rose petals
98
00:03:56,337 --> 00:03:57,971
by sprinkling them
in the bathtub.
99
00:03:58,005 --> 00:04:00,608
Okay, it was me.
100
00:04:00,641 --> 00:04:03,043
First off, thanks,
but we won't be partaking
101
00:04:03,076 --> 00:04:04,978
in the Lovers Package.
102
00:04:05,012 --> 00:04:06,046
You sure? It's
already paid for.
103
00:04:06,079 --> 00:04:08,416
And it comes with
a lot of perks.
104
00:04:08,449 --> 00:04:11,251
Sorry, but we're not...
Uh, quiet, lover.
105
00:04:12,353 --> 00:04:14,021
What kind of perks?
106
00:04:14,054 --> 00:04:15,889
For one, you get a
hundred-dollar-a-day credit
107
00:04:15,923 --> 00:04:17,691
to spend anywhere
at the resort,
108
00:04:17,725 --> 00:04:20,894
which I recommend using at
our four-star restaurant.
109
00:04:20,928 --> 00:04:22,363
Although...
110
00:04:22,396 --> 00:04:24,865
we do have an excellent
room service selection
111
00:04:24,898 --> 00:04:27,868
should you prefer to... stay in.
112
00:04:27,901 --> 00:04:30,404
First off, she is my mother,
I am her son.
113
00:04:30,438 --> 00:04:32,573
I am here instead of my father
because he's sick.
114
00:04:32,606 --> 00:04:35,876
That's a long way to go to get
her to call you Daddy, but okay.
115
00:04:38,078 --> 00:04:39,447
You doing okay there, Dad?
116
00:04:39,480 --> 00:04:41,949
Andrew, is that you?
117
00:04:43,717 --> 00:04:45,453
Here, I'm gonna take
your temperature.
118
00:04:45,486 --> 00:04:47,054
I'll take my pants off.
119
00:04:47,087 --> 00:04:49,089
No, no, no, no.
With this.
120
00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:50,991
It goes in your ear.
121
00:04:52,092 --> 00:04:53,961
What's the temperature?
122
00:04:53,994 --> 00:04:57,698
I don't know, I haven't gotten
through all the hair yet.
123
00:04:57,731 --> 00:04:59,066
(thermometer beeps)
124
00:04:59,099 --> 00:05:01,435
Well, your fever's
actually gone down.
125
00:05:01,469 --> 00:05:04,338
Here. Have some soup.
126
00:05:04,372 --> 00:05:06,774
It looks like it's from a can.
127
00:05:06,807 --> 00:05:09,977
I wanted the kind
my mom used to make.
128
00:05:10,010 --> 00:05:12,680
How am I supposed to know
how to make Nana's soup?
129
00:05:12,713 --> 00:05:14,382
I'll tell you the recipe.
130
00:05:14,415 --> 00:05:16,350
Come closer.
It hurts to talk.
131
00:05:16,384 --> 00:05:17,818
(groans)
132
00:05:17,851 --> 00:05:19,019
All right, fine, but...
133
00:05:19,052 --> 00:05:20,754
(sneezes loudly)
134
00:05:27,461 --> 00:05:29,697
(grunts)
135
00:05:29,730 --> 00:05:32,800
Ma. You never let us
touch the minibar.
136
00:05:32,833 --> 00:05:34,402
I once opened a bag
of caramel corn,
137
00:05:34,435 --> 00:05:36,136
and you said I ruined Europe.
138
00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:39,373
Yes, but here we get
a hundred-dollar daily credit,
139
00:05:39,407 --> 00:05:42,142
so I am currently enjoying
something called a Fresca.
140
00:05:42,175 --> 00:05:43,977
All right.
141
00:05:44,011 --> 00:05:46,847
Let's see if we can hit
a hundred exactly, huh?
142
00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:49,049
It'll be a fun game.
All right.
143
00:05:50,451 --> 00:05:52,085
These look good.
144
00:05:52,119 --> 00:05:54,455
No, not the fancy nuts!
145
00:05:54,488 --> 00:05:56,089
Too expensive.
Here, have some gum--
146
00:05:56,123 --> 00:05:58,091
only five dollars.
147
00:05:58,125 --> 00:06:00,027
Such a fun game.
148
00:06:00,060 --> 00:06:03,431
So, get a load of the activities
on the Lovers Package.
149
00:06:03,464 --> 00:06:05,766
Yeah, let's go ahead
and avoid the word "lovers"
150
00:06:05,799 --> 00:06:07,468
for the rest of the weekend.
151
00:06:07,501 --> 00:06:09,437
Champagne brunch,
tango dancing,
152
00:06:09,470 --> 00:06:12,940
karaoke-- oh, we can
do a couples duet!
153
00:06:12,973 --> 00:06:15,509
How about a couples do-not?
Oh...
154
00:06:15,543 --> 00:06:18,479
Lighten up. There's nothing
romantic about this.
155
00:06:18,512 --> 00:06:19,847
(knocking)
Yeah.
Oh.
156
00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:22,483
(chuckles): That must
be our first activity.
157
00:06:22,516 --> 00:06:24,685
An in-room couples massage.
158
00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:26,820
No. No, no,
no, no, no.
159
00:06:26,854 --> 00:06:31,124
Oh, just keep your eyes closed,
you won't even know I'm here.
160
00:06:31,158 --> 00:06:34,127
Oh, yeah,
right there, yes!
161
00:06:34,161 --> 00:06:36,163
Oh, that's it,
162
00:06:36,196 --> 00:06:38,098
that's it,
that's it!
163
00:06:38,131 --> 00:06:39,800
Oh...!
164
00:06:39,833 --> 00:06:41,635
Bro, I got to get out of here.
165
00:06:41,669 --> 00:06:43,471
You do not want
to come home, trust me.
166
00:06:43,504 --> 00:06:45,473
Taking care of dad
is a nightmare.
167
00:06:45,506 --> 00:06:47,975
I'm pretty sure
I heard Mom have an orgasm.
168
00:06:48,008 --> 00:06:51,812
Dad sneezed in my mouth,
and it had a flavor.
169
00:06:51,845 --> 00:06:53,481
Everyone here thinks
we're a couple.
170
00:06:53,514 --> 00:06:54,615
Everyone everywhere thinks that.
171
00:06:54,648 --> 00:06:56,183
They just don't say it
to your face.
172
00:06:56,216 --> 00:06:58,018
Andrew, I'm serious.
I'm leaving.
173
00:06:58,051 --> 00:06:59,687
So soon?
174
00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:01,522
Got to go.
175
00:07:01,555 --> 00:07:02,890
Hi, there.
176
00:07:02,923 --> 00:07:04,558
Sorry, I didn't mean
to eavesdrop.
177
00:07:04,592 --> 00:07:06,527
I just... was.
178
00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:07,761
Right.
179
00:07:07,795 --> 00:07:08,862
So you're leaving, huh?
180
00:07:08,896 --> 00:07:10,230
I thought you just got here.
181
00:07:10,263 --> 00:07:12,966
I did, and...
I'm not leaving.
182
00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:15,102
(chuckles)
I'm Josh.
183
00:07:15,135 --> 00:07:16,236
Natalie.
Hi.
184
00:07:16,269 --> 00:07:17,805
So, what brings you
185
00:07:17,838 --> 00:07:20,040
to the Cabot Hill
Inn, Natalie?
186
00:07:20,073 --> 00:07:21,074
Bachelorette party.
Ah.
187
00:07:21,108 --> 00:07:24,244
My brother's marrying
a 23-year-old froyo artist.
188
00:07:24,277 --> 00:07:26,747
And I am stuck here
sharing the honeymoon suite
189
00:07:26,780 --> 00:07:28,582
with ten of her
sorority sisters.
190
00:07:28,616 --> 00:07:31,118
Oh.
Can you think
of anything worse?
191
00:07:31,151 --> 00:07:34,488
I can. Sharing a
room with your mom.
(laughs)
192
00:07:34,522 --> 00:07:36,590
Oh, my God,
can you even imagine?
193
00:07:36,624 --> 00:07:39,827
(chuckles mockingly)
I don't have to imagine.
194
00:07:39,860 --> 00:07:41,128
Oh, wow.
195
00:07:41,161 --> 00:07:43,096
You're here with your mom.
196
00:07:43,130 --> 00:07:44,532
Uh-huh.
197
00:07:44,565 --> 00:07:47,535
(women whooping)
198
00:07:47,568 --> 00:07:49,269
Oh, they whoo'd.
That's, uh, bachelorette
199
00:07:49,302 --> 00:07:53,507
for "time to chug champagne
while wearing a penis crown."
200
00:07:53,541 --> 00:07:55,943
Wow, I didn't realize I was
in the presence of royalty.
201
00:07:55,976 --> 00:07:59,146
(laughs) So, maybe
I'll see you around.
202
00:07:59,179 --> 00:08:01,649
Definitely. I'll be
the guy with the mom.
203
00:08:01,682 --> 00:08:02,683
(laughs):
Okay.
204
00:08:02,716 --> 00:08:04,585
Bye.
205
00:08:07,220 --> 00:08:08,288
Mom?
206
00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:10,257
Be right out.
207
00:08:10,290 --> 00:08:12,560
So, guess what just happened...
208
00:08:12,593 --> 00:08:14,862
Wait. Where's the cot
I ordered?
209
00:08:14,895 --> 00:08:16,229
Oh, they ran out.
210
00:08:16,263 --> 00:08:18,732
Something about 12 girls
sleeping in one room.
211
00:08:22,770 --> 00:08:24,538
That's what you're
wearing to bed?
212
00:08:24,572 --> 00:08:26,039
Listen, this was
supposed to be
213
00:08:26,073 --> 00:08:27,641
my anniversary weekend
with your father.
214
00:08:27,675 --> 00:08:29,610
You're lucky I'm
wearing anything.
215
00:08:32,813 --> 00:08:36,183
So, put on your jammies--
what are you waiting for?
216
00:08:36,216 --> 00:08:38,586
My life to make sense.
217
00:08:38,619 --> 00:08:40,754
You know, I think I'm just
gonna sleep on the floor.
218
00:08:40,788 --> 00:08:43,090
Oh, don't be ridiculous--
when you were little,
219
00:08:43,123 --> 00:08:46,259
you used to love to sleep
in the bed with us.
220
00:08:46,293 --> 00:08:49,563
Then you started high school,
it wasn't cool anymore.
221
00:08:49,597 --> 00:08:52,866
So, anyway, I was just
in the lobby, and I met...
222
00:08:52,900 --> 00:08:54,735
Joshie, do you remember
the last time
223
00:08:54,768 --> 00:08:57,104
we went away together,
just you and me?
224
00:08:57,137 --> 00:08:58,606
It was Hershey Park.
225
00:08:58,639 --> 00:09:00,107
You were ten
years old.
226
00:09:00,140 --> 00:09:02,576
Now it's 30 years later, and...
227
00:09:02,610 --> 00:09:04,812
I just want to say
how much it means to me
228
00:09:04,845 --> 00:09:07,314
that you want to spend
this time with me.
229
00:09:07,347 --> 00:09:08,716
Mm-hmm.
230
00:09:08,749 --> 00:09:11,118
Cool, cool.
So, I was in the lobby...
231
00:09:11,151 --> 00:09:13,153
You know, the
reality is,
232
00:09:13,186 --> 00:09:15,956
this is probably the last trip
we'll ever take alone together.
233
00:09:15,989 --> 00:09:19,693
Yeah, you're gonna meet
someone and build a life,
234
00:09:19,727 --> 00:09:23,230
and... I just want you
to know, it's a real gift
235
00:09:23,263 --> 00:09:26,600
that you want to make me your
priority for these two days.
236
00:09:28,168 --> 00:09:30,370
(voice breaks): I'm gonna
cherish every moment.
237
00:09:30,403 --> 00:09:32,873
So, what were you saying
about the lobby?
238
00:09:34,341 --> 00:09:35,643
Oh, I, uh...
239
00:09:35,676 --> 00:09:37,310
Doesn't matter.
240
00:09:37,344 --> 00:09:40,180
Okay. So come--
get into bed with your mother.
241
00:09:48,155 --> 00:09:50,190
There's just something
so delicious
242
00:09:50,223 --> 00:09:53,193
about a waffle they're forced
to make in front of you.
243
00:09:53,226 --> 00:09:55,028
(laughs)
I don't know
244
00:09:55,062 --> 00:09:57,631
about you, but I'm having
a wonderful time.
245
00:09:57,665 --> 00:10:00,200
I am so glad. Cheers.
246
00:10:00,233 --> 00:10:01,869
(glasses clinking)
We're not kissing again!
247
00:10:01,902 --> 00:10:03,170
We're not a couple!
248
00:10:03,203 --> 00:10:05,639
It's complicated.
249
00:10:05,673 --> 00:10:07,040
(chuckles)
250
00:10:07,074 --> 00:10:08,308
You know what?
251
00:10:08,341 --> 00:10:10,043
I'm going to, uh,
get some more coffee.
252
00:10:10,077 --> 00:10:11,745
You don't have any coffee.
253
00:10:11,779 --> 00:10:13,781
Well, if I get some,
that'll be more.
254
00:10:16,116 --> 00:10:17,651
Hey, Natalie.
255
00:10:17,685 --> 00:10:20,087
How was your wild
bachelorette night?
256
00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:21,388
Oh, it was pretty wild.
257
00:10:21,421 --> 00:10:24,324
Yeah, in fact, Officer Nasty
came to break things up,
258
00:10:24,357 --> 00:10:28,061
but turns out he was not a
member of the police force.
259
00:10:28,095 --> 00:10:32,165
Really? Did the pink fuzzy
handcuffs give him away?
260
00:10:32,199 --> 00:10:34,001
(laughs):
They did.
261
00:10:34,034 --> 00:10:35,736
So, what's your plan
for today?
262
00:10:35,769 --> 00:10:37,905
I was about to
hit the hot tub.
263
00:10:37,938 --> 00:10:40,207
If you have time, join me.
264
00:10:40,240 --> 00:10:41,842
Let me think about that
for a second.
265
00:10:41,875 --> 00:10:43,210
I will be right there.
266
00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:47,080
I see you.
267
00:10:47,114 --> 00:10:49,249
I... see you.
268
00:10:53,253 --> 00:10:55,222
So, we have an
hour and a half
269
00:10:55,255 --> 00:10:57,958
until our couples meditation--
what should we do?
270
00:10:57,991 --> 00:11:01,228
Well, I was thinking that
maybe we could spend just...
271
00:11:01,261 --> 00:11:02,763
a little time apart?
272
00:11:02,796 --> 00:11:04,331
Why?
273
00:11:05,265 --> 00:11:07,100
Okay. Uh, the truth is...
274
00:11:07,134 --> 00:11:09,703
I mean, isn't the whole point
to spend time together?
275
00:11:09,737 --> 00:11:11,805
What could be more
important than that?
276
00:11:11,839 --> 00:11:14,775
Nothing in the world, ever,
277
00:11:14,808 --> 00:11:17,144
except maybe the women's
tennis clinic.
278
00:11:17,177 --> 00:11:20,147
You were just saying how you
wanted to work on your backhand.
279
00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:23,283
Yeah, I'd sure like to beat that
loudmouth, Carol Mendelson.
280
00:11:23,316 --> 00:11:26,453
She's become so cocky
since she got her new hip.
281
00:11:26,486 --> 00:11:28,421
Great. Well,
it starts in 15 minutes...
282
00:11:28,455 --> 00:11:30,891
Oh, my God.
...so you'd better
go get changed.
283
00:11:30,924 --> 00:11:33,126
I will take care
of the bill.
All right. Don't forget
284
00:11:33,160 --> 00:11:35,195
to put it on our
daily credit, and...
285
00:11:35,228 --> 00:11:36,864
BOTH:
Write it in the ledger.
286
00:11:36,897 --> 00:11:39,066
Got it. I'll, uh, I'll see you
in the meditation room
287
00:11:39,099 --> 00:11:41,068
in 90 minutes.
All right.
288
00:11:41,101 --> 00:11:42,903
*
289
00:11:42,936 --> 00:11:46,239
Hey. How's it going
in the sick ward?
290
00:11:46,273 --> 00:11:47,808
Not good.
291
00:11:47,841 --> 00:11:50,143
My father just made me put
VapoRub on his chest,
292
00:11:50,177 --> 00:11:53,480
and when my hand came up,
it looked like the Wolfman.
293
00:11:53,513 --> 00:11:55,082
(coughing)
294
00:11:55,115 --> 00:11:57,317
Are you sick?
295
00:11:57,350 --> 00:11:59,152
What? Of course not.
I don't get sick.
296
00:11:59,186 --> 00:12:01,254
I have a superior immune system.
297
00:12:01,288 --> 00:12:02,389
(coughing)
298
00:12:02,422 --> 00:12:04,457
Oh, honey.
299
00:12:04,491 --> 00:12:06,794
Do not come home.
300
00:12:06,827 --> 00:12:08,461
I don't want you
getting the baby sick.
301
00:12:08,495 --> 00:12:12,132
I'm not sick. I...
(coughs)
302
00:12:12,165 --> 00:12:13,433
Oh, my God.
303
00:12:13,466 --> 00:12:16,970
Is this what it feels like
to be mortal?
304
00:12:17,004 --> 00:12:18,839
Andrew, I just
coughed something up,
305
00:12:18,872 --> 00:12:21,141
and I think
it's something I need.
306
00:12:23,376 --> 00:12:25,145
*
307
00:12:27,447 --> 00:12:28,849
Aw.
Hi.
308
00:12:28,882 --> 00:12:30,117
Hi.
309
00:12:30,150 --> 00:12:32,185
So, how was tennis?
310
00:12:32,219 --> 00:12:34,121
Not great.
I missed you the whole time.
311
00:12:34,154 --> 00:12:35,823
Oh...
What were you doing?
312
00:12:35,856 --> 00:12:38,325
Soaking in the hot tub.
By myself.
313
00:12:38,358 --> 00:12:40,093
(meditation bowl dings)
314
00:12:40,127 --> 00:12:43,296
For the next hour, I will lead
you in a guided meditation.
315
00:12:43,330 --> 00:12:45,232
Please begin
by covering your eyes.
316
00:12:48,201 --> 00:12:49,837
Mmm...
317
00:12:49,870 --> 00:12:52,039
INSTRUCTOR:
Listen to your breath.
318
00:12:52,072 --> 00:12:54,341
Feel your body
in the room.
319
00:13:01,414 --> 00:13:02,883
(sighs):
Ah...
320
00:13:02,916 --> 00:13:05,418
I can't believe I have
to go meet my mom.
321
00:13:05,452 --> 00:13:08,021
You really know how
to end a make-out sesh.
322
00:13:08,055 --> 00:13:10,490
What are you doing later?
323
00:13:10,523 --> 00:13:13,493
Well, the other bachelorettes
are going to another strip club.
324
00:13:13,526 --> 00:13:16,363
See, last night they
got arrested by Officer Nasty,
325
00:13:16,396 --> 00:13:20,133
so tonight they have
a court date with Judge Johnson.
326
00:13:20,167 --> 00:13:21,434
Anyway,
327
00:13:21,468 --> 00:13:23,570
I have the room
all to myself, so...
328
00:13:23,603 --> 00:13:26,239
So, I should probably
come keep you company,
329
00:13:26,273 --> 00:13:29,910
which I can do-- and I can't
believe I'm about to say this--
330
00:13:29,943 --> 00:13:32,279
after I tuck my
mother into bed.
331
00:13:32,312 --> 00:13:34,081
(laughs)
332
00:13:34,114 --> 00:13:36,316
Shall we?
333
00:13:36,349 --> 00:13:39,152
Hey, where's your
rollaway bed?
334
00:13:39,186 --> 00:13:40,587
Oh. Uh...
335
00:13:40,620 --> 00:13:42,422
Do they come and take it
away every morning?
336
00:13:42,455 --> 00:13:44,591
Yes, that's
exactly what they do.
337
00:13:52,599 --> 00:13:53,633
(meditation bowl dings)
338
00:13:53,666 --> 00:13:55,402
Ah...
339
00:13:58,671 --> 00:14:02,142
While you're up, can
you get me some tea?
340
00:14:03,343 --> 00:14:05,879
I'm not up.
But while you're up,
341
00:14:05,913 --> 00:14:08,615
could you get me
some more Kleenex?
342
00:14:08,648 --> 00:14:12,552
If you're getting Kleenex,
I can really use some tea.
343
00:14:12,585 --> 00:14:14,387
(groans)
344
00:14:14,421 --> 00:14:17,057
Hey. Just checking in.
345
00:14:17,090 --> 00:14:18,258
Oh, Eve, thank God!
346
00:14:18,291 --> 00:14:20,260
We need Kleenex and tea.
347
00:14:20,293 --> 00:14:21,561
Actually,
348
00:14:21,594 --> 00:14:23,263
I could use some tea, too.
349
00:14:23,296 --> 00:14:25,398
So that's two teas, Kleenex...
350
00:14:25,432 --> 00:14:27,367
Is there anything else, Dad?
351
00:14:27,400 --> 00:14:29,102
You-you want her
to make Nana's soup?
352
00:14:29,136 --> 00:14:32,072
I could really go
for some Nana's soup.
353
00:14:32,105 --> 00:14:34,674
Guys, I-I'm sorry,
but I just got off a long shift,
354
00:14:34,707 --> 00:14:36,676
and I got to let
Wyatt's sitter go.
355
00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:39,312
(whining): Please, I need
that specific soup
356
00:14:39,346 --> 00:14:42,015
I just learned about.
357
00:14:42,049 --> 00:14:45,285
Wow. I'm a pediatrician,
358
00:14:45,318 --> 00:14:48,688
and you're literally a bigger
baby than any of my patients.
359
00:14:48,721 --> 00:14:52,359
I'm not a baby. You're a baby.
360
00:14:52,392 --> 00:14:54,061
Good one.
361
00:14:54,094 --> 00:14:55,295
Okay,
362
00:14:55,328 --> 00:14:57,965
I'll go ask the sitter
to stay longer.
363
00:14:57,998 --> 00:14:59,532
(groans)
364
00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:05,338
You're sure you don't feel
well enough for karaoke?
365
00:15:05,372 --> 00:15:07,340
(weakly):
Sadly, I don't.
366
00:15:07,374 --> 00:15:08,942
I don't feel right about going.
367
00:15:08,976 --> 00:15:10,577
I'll stay here
and take care of you.
368
00:15:10,610 --> 00:15:12,345
No. No.
369
00:15:12,379 --> 00:15:13,947
The best medicine
370
00:15:13,981 --> 00:15:16,416
for me is you
having fun at karaoke.
371
00:15:16,449 --> 00:15:18,451
(coughing)
Oh...
372
00:15:18,485 --> 00:15:19,686
You go. Go.
373
00:15:19,719 --> 00:15:21,621
I'll stay here and rest.
374
00:15:21,654 --> 00:15:24,357
All right.
375
00:15:24,391 --> 00:15:26,526
I'm gonna sing
"You're Always on My Mind,"
376
00:15:26,559 --> 00:15:28,028
because you are.
377
00:15:28,061 --> 00:15:29,162
And then I'll sing
378
00:15:29,196 --> 00:15:31,498
"Baby Got Back," because I do.
379
00:15:32,399 --> 00:15:34,501
(door closes)
380
00:15:35,568 --> 00:15:37,570
*
381
00:15:38,671 --> 00:15:41,708
Wow, Mrs. Roberts, you killed
that "Baby Got Back" solo.
382
00:15:43,210 --> 00:15:44,344
I'll charge this
to your room.
383
00:15:44,377 --> 00:15:46,213
Yes, just put it
on our daily credit.
384
00:15:46,246 --> 00:15:47,514
Oh. That's been exceeded.
385
00:15:47,547 --> 00:15:49,983
No, that's not possible--
I know for a fact
386
00:15:50,017 --> 00:15:52,219
that I have $13.47 left.
387
00:15:52,252 --> 00:15:56,256
I had $19.81 left, but
I bought a Toblerone,
388
00:15:56,289 --> 00:15:58,325
and a Zantac.
389
00:15:58,358 --> 00:16:01,995
Well, our system shows
that the last of the credit
390
00:16:02,029 --> 00:16:05,165
was just used for two beers
at the lobby bar.
391
00:16:06,733 --> 00:16:09,402
That's why I don't date
the young ones.
392
00:16:09,436 --> 00:16:12,105
They always hurt you.
393
00:16:14,341 --> 00:16:16,143
Can I just say thank you
for being so cool
394
00:16:16,176 --> 00:16:18,078
about me having to spend
time with my mom.
395
00:16:18,111 --> 00:16:20,280
Seriously, I bet she was
happy my dad got sick
396
00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:22,149
so she could guilt
me into coming.
397
00:16:22,182 --> 00:16:24,317
But now...
I'm glad I came.
398
00:16:24,351 --> 00:16:26,086
Is that so?
399
00:16:26,119 --> 00:16:27,420
Oh.
400
00:16:27,454 --> 00:16:28,555
Mom.
401
00:16:28,588 --> 00:16:31,024
You think I guilted you
into coming?
402
00:16:31,058 --> 00:16:32,792
You ask to come.
403
00:16:32,825 --> 00:16:34,294
Did you just hear
a whoo?
404
00:16:34,327 --> 00:16:36,996
I think I heard a whoo.
You know, I better go check.
405
00:16:38,465 --> 00:16:41,501
Well... yeah,
when I asked to come,
406
00:16:41,534 --> 00:16:43,336
I was just playing along
with your little game.
407
00:16:43,370 --> 00:16:46,106
What game?
The one where you act like
you don't want me to do
408
00:16:46,139 --> 00:16:48,275
the thing we both know you
desperately want me to do.
409
00:16:48,308 --> 00:16:49,809
I wasn't playing a game.
410
00:16:49,842 --> 00:16:51,411
You said you
wanted to join me.
411
00:16:51,444 --> 00:16:53,346
Apparently, that was a lie.
412
00:16:53,380 --> 00:16:55,482
Look, I didn't mean to...
Aw, save it.
413
00:16:55,515 --> 00:16:57,317
And don't follow me.
414
00:16:59,319 --> 00:17:01,721
I can't even look at you.
415
00:17:03,756 --> 00:17:05,458
My throat hurts.
416
00:17:05,492 --> 00:17:07,127
My chest hurts.
417
00:17:07,160 --> 00:17:08,428
Eve...!
Eve...!
418
00:17:08,461 --> 00:17:11,331
Yes, I get it--
you're sick,
419
00:17:11,364 --> 00:17:13,400
you're very, very sick.
420
00:17:13,433 --> 00:17:15,768
So here is
your blanket.
Ah.
421
00:17:15,802 --> 00:17:17,470
Here's your warm water
with lemon.
422
00:17:17,504 --> 00:17:19,139
And I'm done taking care of...
423
00:17:19,172 --> 00:17:21,108
(both sneeze loudly)
424
00:17:21,141 --> 00:17:22,609
(Andrew groaning)
425
00:17:22,642 --> 00:17:25,345
Welcome aboard.
426
00:17:33,586 --> 00:17:35,122
Mom?
427
00:17:35,155 --> 00:17:36,723
Wow, took you long enough.
428
00:17:36,756 --> 00:17:39,526
You told me not to follow you.
429
00:17:39,559 --> 00:17:42,262
Well, obviously,
I wanted you to follow me.
430
00:17:42,295 --> 00:17:44,197
You see? This is the game
I was talking about.
431
00:17:44,231 --> 00:17:46,299
Okay, so sometimes
I play the game,
432
00:17:46,333 --> 00:17:48,268
but I was
genuinely thrilled
433
00:17:48,301 --> 00:17:49,802
to spend time with
you this weekend,
434
00:17:49,836 --> 00:17:52,472
because I thought you wanted
to spend time with me.
435
00:17:52,505 --> 00:17:54,474
Ma, I did.
436
00:17:54,507 --> 00:17:56,509
But then I met Natalie.
437
00:17:56,543 --> 00:17:58,645
Well, you could've told me
instead of tricking me
438
00:17:58,678 --> 00:18:00,747
and sneaking around.
439
00:18:00,780 --> 00:18:02,815
You're right.
I should have.
440
00:18:02,849 --> 00:18:05,118
I'm sorry I hurt
your feelings.
441
00:18:05,152 --> 00:18:06,819
All right. Thank you.
442
00:18:06,853 --> 00:18:09,322
Anything else
you're sorry for?
443
00:18:11,191 --> 00:18:15,262
I'm sorry I took this special
time with you for granted.
444
00:18:15,295 --> 00:18:17,230
That's nice.
445
00:18:17,264 --> 00:18:19,266
But I was hoping you'd
say you were sorry
446
00:18:19,299 --> 00:18:22,202
for pushing us over the
hundred-dollar daily limit.
447
00:18:24,204 --> 00:18:26,706
I am sorry for that, too.
448
00:18:27,707 --> 00:18:29,176
Okay?
449
00:18:29,209 --> 00:18:30,743
Okay.
450
00:18:30,777 --> 00:18:32,779
(chuckles)
451
00:18:32,812 --> 00:18:35,182
Now go and see
your new friend.
452
00:18:35,215 --> 00:18:37,917
I will, after you
and I do karaoke.
453
00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:41,221
Oh, you don't want to
do karaoke with me.
454
00:18:41,254 --> 00:18:43,623
Yes, I do.
No, you don't have to.
455
00:18:43,656 --> 00:18:46,793
Mom, please do karaoke...
You got to admit
this is a fun game.
456
00:18:46,826 --> 00:18:48,628
You.
457
00:18:50,497 --> 00:18:54,201
After we get better,
we should burn this couch.
458
00:18:55,535 --> 00:18:58,571
It's not already burning?
I feel so hot.
459
00:18:59,972 --> 00:19:03,276
(shivering):
Really? I'm freezing.
460
00:19:03,310 --> 00:19:04,844
All right, all right,
all right.
461
00:19:04,877 --> 00:19:08,748
Dr. Nick is making a house call
with three doses
462
00:19:08,781 --> 00:19:11,218
of his patented
feel-better party juice.
463
00:19:12,419 --> 00:19:14,321
Now...
464
00:19:14,354 --> 00:19:15,722
the whiskey's
gonna burn at first,
465
00:19:15,755 --> 00:19:17,724
but that just means
it's working.
466
00:19:17,757 --> 00:19:20,393
And then we're gonna cool it off
with this cold medicine, okay?
467
00:19:20,427 --> 00:19:22,229
(chuckles)
468
00:19:22,262 --> 00:19:23,396
Side effects may include:
469
00:19:23,430 --> 00:19:24,931
(snaps fingers)
Mm-hmm...
470
00:19:26,333 --> 00:19:28,301
Mixed in with
a little bit of:
471
00:19:28,335 --> 00:19:30,337
Oh. Okay.
472
00:19:31,838 --> 00:19:34,241
Okay.
473
00:19:34,274 --> 00:19:35,675
Bottoms up.
474
00:19:38,245 --> 00:19:40,247
(whoops loudly)
(Andrew groans)
475
00:19:40,280 --> 00:19:41,648
Oh, oh, oh...
Ugh...
476
00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:44,617
Oh, here comes
the side effects. Ah, damn.
477
00:19:44,651 --> 00:19:46,686
Ah, damn.
478
00:19:48,588 --> 00:19:50,990
BOTH:
* Islands in the stream
479
00:19:51,023 --> 00:19:52,759
* That is what we are
480
00:19:52,792 --> 00:19:55,495
* No one in between
481
00:19:55,528 --> 00:19:57,564
* How can we be wrong
482
00:19:57,597 --> 00:19:59,632
* Sail away with me
483
00:19:59,666 --> 00:20:01,401
* To another world
484
00:20:01,434 --> 00:20:03,336
* Making...
* Making love
485
00:20:03,370 --> 00:20:05,772
* To each other, uh-huh
486
00:20:05,805 --> 00:20:08,908
* From one lover to another
487
00:20:08,941 --> 00:20:10,543
* Uh-huh...
488
00:20:16,383 --> 00:20:18,385
Captioning sponsored by
CBS
489
00:20:20,853 --> 00:20:22,855
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org
490
00:20:23,490 --> 00:20:26,459
* La, la, la, la,
la, la, la, la, la *
491
00:20:26,493 --> 00:20:29,462
* La, la, la, la, la,
la, la, la, la *
492
00:20:29,496 --> 00:20:30,997
* La, la, la, la,
la, la, la, la, la *
493
00:20:31,498 --> 00:20:34,000
* Come on,
won't you take me home? *
35309
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof