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[♪♪♪]

[MAN] Pasadena.

Home to little old ladies,

Nobel Laureates,

high-tech science,

beautiful museums,

and a Pulitzer Prize
winner or two.

Welcome to a city where
people still read.

Are you looking for
anything special?

No.

You like thrillers?

Not particularly.

It's a pretty good one.

I didn't think Hitler
had children.

Well, none that we know of,

but, what if Hitler
had a child with Eva Braun,

and he was raised in Argentina

by the Nazis in order to follow
in his father's footsteps?

That is so ridiculous.

Well, it's a premise,

and they're allowed to
be ridiculous.

Thanks, but I'm going
to keep looking.

[BYRON] $25 book for $3.99.

Not if I don't buy it.

[BYRON] Right.

Is this you?

Did you write this book?

It only took seven years
out of my life,

but don't let that
influence you.

Would you sign this for me?

Are you sure?

Sure.

What would you like me to say?

You're the author.

Thanks.

"Enjoy"...

I definitely will.

- Please do.
- Thanks.

Thank you.

[BOTH] Bye.

[MAN] This is the story
of Byron Tiller,

a modest man living in
a modest Pasadena neighborhood,

a neighborhood built
for middle-income families,

when the middle was still closer
to the top than the bottom.

- [BYRON] Say hi to Mom.
- [DENA] Hi, guys.

- [BYRON] Hi, how are you?
- [DENA] Hi.

- You need help?
- [DENA] No.

I sold a book today.

Hey, that's good.

I haven't done the math,

but I think it will bring us
another three cents.

Of course, the taxes
will kill us.

The important thing is, honey...

- Yeah.
- people are reading your work.

I went to Rizzoli's.

At first, I didn't find it,

but then I turned around,
and there it was.

Seven years of my life
in the remainder bin,

along with cookbooks, self-help,

and achieving orgasm.

Hey, if people aren't willing
to pay full price for orgasms,

then you have nothing to
be ashamed of.

- What is this?
- What?

Did Heinz die or something?

The man, you know, he
makes 57 varieties,

and we can't afford any of them?

Why pay extra for a label?

How many diapers is Nathaniel
still going through in one week?

Well, that depends on

if he decides to spit his food
up instead of swallow it.

And when does he decide to
take muscle control seriously?

Three, I think.

Then my new book better
get published...

quick.

I don't want you to ever worry
about anything, champ.

Daddy's going to take
care of you.

You go to sleep now,
Mr. Nathaniel Hawthorne Tiller.

I love you.

[NATHANIEL SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY]

What are you doing in there?

I'm just moving his head,

making sure that it
doesn't flatten out on one side.

It hardened two years ago.

Come to bed.

Come to bed?

[DENA CHUCKLING]

What were my two men
talking about?

Mostly, we were talking
about law schools.

I think he's leaning
toward Duke.

- That's a good school.
- He thinks so.

What if he doesn't want
to be a lawyer?

Nobody wants to be a lawyer.

That's why you have to
shove that seed in early.

What if he wants to be a writer,
like his father?

As long we don't let
that head flatten out,

that won't happen.

You don't have a flat head.

Maybe not on the outside.

- Honey...
- What?

God gave you a gift.

Remember what Newsweeksaid?

"Byron Tiller's sentences
have bounce and color."

Mm.

"Hitler's Childshows
sparks of originality

not often seen in thrillers."

Mm. "Not often seen in the
thriller mode,"

I believe it said.

And what about The Times?

Refresh me.

Hmm.

I believe he said something

about me and that Hemingway guy.

- Yeah?
- Yes.

I think it slipped my mind.

Oh, really, it
slipped your mind?

Maybe I should
refresh your memory.

Refreshing-- here...I go.

[TAKES A DEEP BREATH]

Oh, my God.

"Like Hemingway...

he carves his sentences..."

[MOANING]

"with a... with a
diamond cutter's eye,

leaving the best and
the brightest."

God, you're good.

[BYRON] I can't hear you.

I said you're good.

[MAN] Whether his wife
was talking to Byron or God

isn't certain,

but there seemed to be more
than enough credit to go around,

and that's what got
my attention.

Tucked neatly between
the Hollywood porno shops,

novelty shops, and
Scientology shops,

crammed in amongst the
recording studios

whose heyday had long passed,

the unproduced screenwriters
whose deals had long lapsed,

and the bad actors
teaching methods

on emoting to other bad actors,

who dream of one day
passing an audition,

sat Byron Tiller,

who, until recently,

believed writing novels
no one wanted to read

was a real job.

Sell, baby, sell.

[MAN] Goals have a way of
becoming less high-minded,

when you need the money.

Priority.

- Yes, sir.
- Okay?

Thank you.

[MAN] The type of man
perfect for Elysian Fields.

[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]

[BYRON] You know, I
sent it to you

because Little Brown
published the last one,

so I figured, you know,

why break up a
winning combination?

- Biscotti?
- No, I'm okay, thanks.

Well, I'm sure it could use
a trim here and there,

but that's why
you're the editor.

Well, all I can say is
that Excalibur

must be one great sword

for all those people
to want to kill each other

just to get their hands on it.

You know, it's the sword

that King Arthur himself
pulled out of the rock.

I know the backstory.

Of course.

It just seemed a
little out of place

in a novel about
migrant workers.

Well, Excalibur represents...

A symbol.

A symbol?

Yes, it represents to me

the downtrodden's
hopes and dreams for the future.

- Uh-huh.
- The migrant workers

- are simply a microcosm.
- Aren't they always?

See...

that's where we have a problem.

What is that?

I'll tell you a little secret
about microcosms.

People hate them.

- I wasn't aware.
- [MAN] Think about it.

Who wants to sit on
a fucking bus reading a book

that's telling you
you're part of a microcosm?

I mean, he already knows it,

he looks around, and he knows,
he knows.

Symbolism's even worse.

Some poor bastard
picks up a book,

he wants it spelled out for him.

No one wants to waste their time
looking for deeper meaning.

Well, my wife thinks it's
the best thing I ever wrote.

She must love you very much.

Look, you know,

I've always been completely open

to any kind of
creative suggestions, changes...

That wouldn't be fair to you.

Anything.

Maybe next time.

Could I get an advance?

On what?

The next one.

- You know I'd like to, but...
- [BYRON] Virgil.

I know that my problems
are not your problems...

but I've got nothing
left to live on.

Are you really that desperate?

Yes.

Then use that emotion.

All of the best novels
are written in desperation.

So are the best suicide notes.

Serves me right to think
a guy in a $1,400 suit

would give a shit about
migrant workers.

So what if your editor
hated your book?

You know what my
advice to you is?

Fuck him.

Thanks, Harry.

That's one swell pep talk.

[MAN] Hello.

How you doing?

[MAN] We haven't
been introduced.

No.

The name's Luther Fox.

Byron Tiller.

So you're a writer?

Right.

Anything I'd know?

I sincerely doubt it.

I did manage to publish
a little piece of shit

called Hitler's Child.

Mm, I liked it.

You read it?

You sound surprised.

Well, I've never actually
met my public.

Well, here I am.

So, what are you doing next?

Well, I'm toying with
a few ideas.

I think I'd make a very good
key punch operator.

Things a bit tough at the
moment, right?

Hemingway killed himself,

and people actually
bought his books.

Me, I'm in the fucking
remainder bin.

It's hard not to think
of the remainder bin

as representing doom

on some sort of cosmic level.

Don't you think you're making
a mountain out of mole hill?

The problem is that my mountain
has shrunk into a mole hill,

and unless you're a family...

of moles,

then how do you live?

A man can always
support his family

if he's willing to do
whatever's necessary.

I've got to go.

Oh, listen. I appreciate
the drinks and the ear.

Thank you.

You know, if key punch operator
doesn't happen for you,

why don't you drop by the office

and maybe we can work
something out.

There's nothing like
a little life experience.

Hey.

What did your editor say?

[BYRON] Why aren't you asleep?

I couldn't wait,
I had to hear what he said.

[BYRON] He saw room for changes.

But he loved it, right?

[BYRON] I don't know about love.
That's a relative term.

Relative to what?

To whether you're a John
Grisham or not.

Somebody like me,
they don't get too effusive.

Mm.

They are going to publish it,
right?

Yes.

Did he say when?

No, that's scheduling,
the other side of the building.

I'll find out.

I told you it would all
work out, didn't I?

[BYRON] Paul Pearson!

Paul Pearson.

- I thought it was you.
- Good to see you.

Good to see you.

Things going well
since you left us?

Yes, great.

I just had my first
novel published.

So I hear.

I've been meaning to read it,
but I haven't been able to find

a book store that carries it.

Right.

So how's the office?

Oh, you know advertising--

killing ourselves a
little every day.

Yeah, I miss it.

You know, the action,
the deadlines.

There's a hell of
an adrenaline rush there.

I'd even consider
getting back in

under the right circumstances.

You told me to go fuck myself.

Yeah, well, that was
the adrenaline talking.

You'd really be willing
to come back?

Yes.

- Salary would be smaller.
- Right.

- Accounts would be shit.
- Whatever you decide.

Well, that's a good attitude.

Why didn't you have it before?

Well, I've grown up a little.

I'm very glad to hear it.

Thank you.

I'll see you in the morning?

Actually, I think it
would be better

if you'd just... go
fuck yourself.

[MAN] Congratulations, Byron.

So you've come here
to celebrate.

Where else?

My two favorite people.

Tell you what, I'm going to
send over my very best bottle--

No, Dom, please, that's
not necessary.

It's my gift to the author.

That's very generous.

[DENA] Now, don't get mad,

but, um, I think maybe we should

borrow some money
from my parents.

Your father hates me.

Which is all the more reason
he'll loan us the money.

It'll make him feel superior.

I don't want to give him
the satisfaction.

Honey, he's never satisfied,

you know that,

and, you know, once
your novel gets published,

we'll pay him back
with interest.

Do you ever think that
your father was right?

About what?

That maybe I am a failure?

You just love me

and figure that everything
is going to work out?

Of course.

Unconditional love
can be a real pain the ass.

Bye.

Bye.

Love you.

See you after work.

What do you want to do now,
champ?

Want to go to the
park for a while?

Hmm?

[MAN] A tough fucking business.

You write the goddamnIliad ,

who knows if anyone's
going to buy it?

Take your last book,

a nice little review
in The Times.

You made nothing, right?

In that neighborhood.

Well, what kind of
business is that?

Got to ask yourself

what the hell Gutenberg
was thinking.

I don't give a good rat's ass

what Gutenberg was thinking,

so let's just cut the bullshit.

You need money, right?

Yes, a loan.

Well, I've given the matter
a lot of thought,

and I'm not going to lend
you the money.

Why?

What was it Shakespeare said?

"Neither a borrower nor
a lender be."

Look, I'm only here

because I promised your daughter
that I would meet you

and stick my tongue up your ass.

I guess my work here is done.

We both know you'll never
be able to support your family.

Think about it!

Hi, how you doing?

Yeah?

[BYRON] Hi.

Uh, is Mr. Luther Fox around?

This is around. You see
him anywhere?

No. Will you tell him that
Byron Tiller came by to see him?

Byron Tiller the writer?

You heard of me?

Sure.

The other day, from Luther.

Right.

My fame is spreading.

[LUTHER] I assumed
you'd be here.

Nohra, my receptionist,
told me you'd come by.

[BYRON] She doesn't like people
very much, does she?

Oh, well, I've known her
for six years,

and the only things I'm
sure she likes

are romance novels
and Raisinets.

Not much of an office, is it?

Well, it's not so much an office

as it is a place to pick
up your messages.

Right. It's just,
I was thinking, you know,

the other day you mentioned

you might have something for me,

so I figured I'd come by.

Why don't you come over
and we'll talk all about it?

Sure.

You know, the only other
job I've ever had

is with an ad agency,

and now they wouldn't
let me back in.

I've been to a number
of employment agencies,

and they just keep telling me

I'm not equipped to do
anything else.

So, what is it?

What kind of business is it
that you're in?

Elysian Fields is an
escort service.

An escort service?

Mm-hmm.

An escort service.

So, what you're saying is
you sort of...

you know, like, stand on
a street corner,

put on a cowboy hat--

No, we're not hustlers.

Oh.

We tend to the wounds
of lonely women

in need of emotional
as well as spiritual solace.

- Women.
- Often, it's only friendship.

Only women?

Call me old-fashioned.

And this is the job

that you thought I
would be right for?

Well, you're handsome,
well-educated, compassionate.

How do you know I'm
compassionate?

I'm the one
that read your novel, remember?

Compassion was its
greatest strength.

Thank you.

Even if the premise was shit.

Well, if you would have
read the fly leaf,

you would have also noticed

that I'm married and
I have a kid.

All the better.

How is that better?

Well, we're professionals,

and a family at home

prevents any
unnecessary entanglements

with the clientele.

You have a family at home?

Well, I'm not that fortunate,
but many of our employees do.

Now, look, it's not like
I'm trying to sit

on top of any moral high ground,

but this business you're in,

doesn't it make you a
little bit ashamed?

No. Poverty does that.

What I'm suggesting can be as
short-term as you want it to be,

just to get you over this little
dry patch in your life.

Temporary.

[NATHANIEL SPEAKING
INDISTINCTLY]

[LUTHER] Hello.

Oh. How are you?

I was passing by.

I wanted to thank you
for the, uh...

You thanked me last night.

Well, I don't remember.

I do.

Well, it's not easy to be polite
when you're suicidal.

- [TELEPHONE RINGING]
- I was very impressed.

I've just got to get that.

Well, again...

No, no, come on in. Come in.

- Are you sure?
- Yeah, absolutely.

[TELEPHONE RINGING]

I didn't know you were already

back in the country, Mrs.
Hardwick.

Well, my book says you were

going to be in India
for another month.

Well, I know curry can do that.

Right.

[LUTHER] But you always look
wonderful, my dear.

Naturally.

I'm not sure if I can
do something

on such short notice.

How much-- How much body
hair do you have?

What?

How much body hair do you have?

Body hair, why?

The amount they pay, they can
afford to be particular.

Uh, let me call you back,
about five o'clock, okay?

I'm sure I can find you
someone by then.

Bye-bye, Mrs. Hardwick.

She's not right for you anyway.

Right. Look, Luther,

I must confess that I have
been thinking about

what you proposed to
me last night.

Do you play tennis?

Badly.

Good. She hates to lose.

- Who's that?
- Mrs. Franklin Buckner.

Uh, look, I...

I was up all last night,

- and I thought that--
- Mrs. Loretta Forbes of Encino,

46, likes opera, the ballet...

That's kind of what I
was thinking.

You know, maybe like on
an interim basis.

Something like opera, tennis,
ballet,

but just no, you know...

I just don't want the, uh...

Well, you know...

You know, that thing over there.

Maybe this is a... a
very bad idea.

An idea is only bad if
it doesn't work.

Right, well, you know,
maybe somewhere down the line

you can find me like
a nice old gal

who's looking for,
like, a...bridge partner.

- Byron.
- What?

I was nervous my first time too,

and that's why it's so important

we find someone
you can respond to in kind.

I mean, if we can't
provide true love,

at least we can
provide symmetry.

And your wedding ring and
your specs, they'll have to go.

Oh, Luther, look...

I really appreciate
what you've done.

Well, I haven't done
anything yet.

Well, maybe that's for the best.

[LUTHER] Andrea Allcott,
35 years old,

charismatic, face of an angel,

and you should have a
lot in common.

Her husband's a novelist, too,
just like you.

Great.

You may have heard of him,
Tobias Allcott.

Tobias Allcott, the
Pulitzer Prize winner?

Yeah, well, actually,
I think he's won three,

but "Pulitzer Prizes winner"
sounds almost gluttonous.

You know, in college,
I took an entire course

just specifically on
his writing.

Oh, really, how did you do?

- B-plus.
- [LUTHER] Oh.

Maybe you should...bone up.

Baby, have you seen my earring?

[LUTHER] Hmm?

What did you do, swallow it?

[LUTHER] You know, I've
got a really good

feeling about this guy.

Yeah, well, you've always

had a good instinct for
this kind of thing.

Yeah, I do, don't I?

He must be quite a prospect.

Well, when Picasso's art teacher
saw his first doodles,

he must have sensed
something special.

That's just how I felt
when I first met you.

Oh, darling,

you're hopelessly romantic.

Hopeful...

which is a lot worse.

It's late.

Mm-hmm.

Let's go and do something then.

No, George expects me.

Mm, let's go and celebrate.
Come on.

Don't you think it's a
trifle premature?

That's the best time
to celebrate,

before everything turns sour.

Don't worry. It won't.

Here.

What's this?

It's last month's check.

I forgot.

So did I.

Bye.

[DENA] You going out?

- Didn't I tell you?
- [DENA] No.

I have a meeting with
the Little Brown publishers.

- This late?
- [BYRON] Drinks and dinner.

Why?

It's a little early to
talk about it.

- [DENA] Not to me.
- Well, you know me.

I'm a little superstitious.

No, you're not.

About the good things, I am.

You just haven't noticed

because a lot of good things
haven't been coming up lately.

They want me to meet some people
from the Book of the Month Club.

Oh, my God. Really?

Don't go crazy. There's
no guarantees.

No, honey, but that's great.

I think they were trying
to squeeze me in,

maybe to a short one, February.

Oh.

I wish you had something
nicer to wear.

It's just dinner.

The table's going to
hide most of me.

If they have lobster, order it,

because then, at least,
you know,

you're covered by the bib.

I've got to go.

[DENA] I'm going to want to hear
everything when you get home.

Okay.

[♪♪♪]

[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]

You must be the new man.

Uh, yeah.

Nigel Halsey.

Byron Ti--

Yes, the writer.

Well, the master must
be impressed.

I see he took you to Dunhill.

Let's see.

Oh, God, not her again.

Never tell a client she
has a nice ass

or you'll never see
the end of it.

Would you like the
Bulgari tonight?

Uh, no. No, no, you take it.

Thanks.

Have you ever done
this kind of work before?

No.

It's like rolling off a log,

just don't roll off
until they finish.

Well, Luther actually said

that they don't all
necessarily want to...

Right, right.

Well, you'll get used to it.

It's when they want you
to hold them afterwards,

as if it meant something,

that's when you realize
it's all full of bullshit.

Hey, but what business isn't?

Could be selling used cars.

At least we give them
their money's worth,

but don't worry, Byron,

you'll be fine.

All these rich bitches want
is some companionship and sex.

We're like cocker
spaniels with hard-ons.

I'll keep that image in mind.

Good.

[DENA] Hello?

Hi. It's me.

Is anything wrong?

Yeah. Uh, no, I just...

I just got one of those urges
to tell you that I love you.

And I love you.

Why?

You know why.

I need to hear it.

Because you're smart and funny

and thoughtful.

Dena...

I, you know, I don't...

I don't feel any of
those things.

Byron, you're just nervous,
but it's okay.

You know why?

Why?

Because I'll be right here,
believing in you, okay?

Okay.

[LUTHER] Everyone's nervous
the first time.

It was important for Byron
to meet someone beautiful,

someone like Andrea Allcott,

who, indeed, had the
face of an angel,

and it wasn't just her face.

Plastic surgeons
make enough money to buy yachts

for rearranging nature
in a more pleasing way.

No, this wasn't
just any run-of-the-mill angel.

This one, I'm sure, God
handled himself.

You must be the man from
Elysian Fields.

Yes.

[SINGING OPERA]

I hate going to these
things alone.

I'd have got out of it,
but it's for charity.

Let's hope they find a cure
for whatever it is, quick.

[BYRON] So, what would you
like to do now?

Are you hungry?

Not really.

Actually, a biscotti
would be nice.

A biscotti, of course.

- One biscotti, please.
- Sure.

How much?

Two dollars.

Listen, can I get a receipt?

No.

- Here you go.
- Thank you.

You don't have to thank me,

it's a business expense.

Which brings up a question

I'm not sure I should ask.

Asking is your prerogative,

not answering is mine.

Why didn't you consider
bringing a friend this evening?

Right.

And why would someone like you

need someone like me?

There are some
occasions to which

a woman should have an escort.

Yes, but I would figure

that it would be very
easy for you

to find a real one.

Aren't you a real one?

I mean, someone

that you wouldn't
have to arrange.

I'm married.

That's not always a
stumbling block.

I love my husband dearly.

That's very nice.

We think so.

Will you be all right in a taxi?

Yes.

Good night, Mr. Tiller.

Good night.

[LUTHER] If you could
mail the check

immediately, Mrs. Randolph,

I'd really appreciate it.

Yeah. Thank you. Goodbye.

I don't know why they call them
outstanding checks,

as if not being paid
is somehow a good thing.

I saw you last night.

- Yeah, where?
- At the concert.

Yeah.

She's very attractive.

Yeah, Jennifer Adler.
She's been a client for years.

In fact, she's the only client
I still handle personally.

If it hadn't been for her,
I would have retired years ago.

Well, I think I will be
retiring now.

Already?

Yeah, I'm not...

I'm not sure I'm really cut out
for this sort of thing.

Are you doubting my instincts?

No.

Well, then, I hope
you like experimental theater.

I hate coming to these
things alone.

I'd have gotten out of it--

Let me guess, it's for charity.

I used to have one of those
on my dashboard.

So, um...

How about a biscotti?

You want me to get in this time.

If you like.

If I don't, will the
check bounce?

It might.

- Where to then, ma'am?
- [ANDREA] Pasadena.

Like one?

No, thank you.

So, do you go out often?

Not often.

Most of our friends are
my husband's,

and most of his
friends are dead.

[BYRON] Would you like me
to see you to the door?

It would be polite.

- Thank you, Phillip.
- Good night, ma'am.

[BYRON] Thank you.

Do you like hot cocoa?

Do you make it with
milk or water?

Milk, of course.

What would you have done
if I had said water?

Pray for marshmallows.

Mm, it's delicious.

I wasn't sure how much milk.

I usually only make it for one.

Doesn't your husband
like hot cocoa?

He has diabetes.

You seem so very young

to be married to
someone like him.

It didn't matter at first,

but in the last couple of years,
you know.

I'm sure it's very tough on him,
being a writer.

What would you know about that?

I'm sort of a writer myself.

Really?

Yes, really.

Are you surprised?

[ANDREA] Actually, no.

You're not the sort of man
who'd be satisfied

dragging lonely women
around public events.

Oh, so you are lonely?

There's absolutely
nothing lonelier

than watching the man you
love slowly die.

"Death,

the only immortal who
treats us all alike,

whose pity and whose peace

and whose refuge are for all."

That's very beautiful.

Mark Twain.

The reality is less poetic.

I'm sorry.

[ANDREA MOANING]

[MOANING CONTINUES]

Hello, darling.

What are you doing up so late?

Oh, I forgot to take my
insulin shot.

I just went down and did it.

[ANDREA] But you feel okay?

Yeah, yeah, I'm all right.

Oh, darling, I'd like you
to meet Byron Tiller.

Byron.

Byron?

Oh, hello.

Hello, sir.

[ANDREA] Byron's a writer too.

Is that a fact?

Yes, I write a little bit.

Certainly not in your league.

Well, at least
that's comforting.

Would you like me to get
you some food?

No, no. No thanks, darling.

You just continue on
with what you're doing.

It's an honor to meet you, sir.

I was about to say,
"The pleasure is all mine,"

but that would be foolish,
wouldn't it?

[TOBIAS CHUCKLING]

Good night.

Oh, shit.

[LUTHER] Byron Tiller.

You're simply inspiring.

Morning.

[BYRON] Morning.

Did you sleep well?

Not a wink.

Neither did I.

It seems we're a couple
of insomniacs.

Well, Lottie got me going
with some strong coffee.

Lottie, you shouldn't
give him a mug.

He's not a tradesman.

Oh, thanks, no. I'm not hungry,
thank you.

It's not for you.

Mr. Allcott wants you to
bring him his breakfast.

Me? Why?

Well, um, it'll come up
in conversation.

[TOBIAS] Come in.

Come in!

[BYRON] I heard the typing,

but I didn't want to disturb you
while you were working.

Your breakfast is getting cold.

Yeah, well, it doesn't make
any difference anyway,

I'm not allowed to eat it.

A soft-boiled egg is all I get.

The rest of it is just for show,
so I don't feel deprived.

Yes, sir.

It'll end up in the
dog's tray later.

Yes, sir. Enjoy.

Did you have a good
time last night?

It's quite all right.

She has my blessing.

A man should make sure
his wife is taken care of,

any way he can. Don't you agree?

Uh, yes, very much, sir.

Perhaps it was a mistake

marrying a woman who was
much younger than me, but

I was very robust
until just a few years ago.

I've heard all the stories, sir.

Yeah, they'll only believe
the outrageous ones.

I was blessed to live
a life without boundaries,

but in the end...

only God gets to do that.

Genius should be
afforded privileges

not handed out to ordinary men.

You think I'm a genius?

[BYRON] Yes, sir, I do.

Well, you're probably right,

but even that becomes
more difficult with time.

You know, when I was your age,

ideas used to flow out of me.

Now, I have to squeeze them out
like little farts

before I can string
them together.

You're probably just in a slump.

Slump? It can only be classified
as a slump

if it happens in the
middle of your life,

not at the end of it.

But you are working now.

It took me 12 years
to write that.

I was just going through
and tidying it up a bit,

killing all the
unnecessary adjectives.

I certainly can't wait
for it to be published.

Yes, I don't think
I'll be able to wait either,

it's, uh, you see,

all my organs have
turned against me.

Those little bastards.

Would you like to read it?

Really?

Yes, you're a writer.

I'd like another
professional's opinion.

My wife thinks it's wonderful.

- Yes.
- But she's my wife,

and you can never trust
a value system

where true love is involved.

[DENA] What are you doing?

Reading.

My editor gave me the latest
manuscript from Tobias Allcott.

[DENA] Is it any good?

None of it is any good.

[DENA] Then put it down
and pay attention to me.

It's about time a man
spent an evening

with his wife instead
of his editor.

Are you ready?

Uh, yeah.

What do you think?

Very nice.

I spent more than I
probably should,

but I figured you needed a suit

now that you're an
important author.

Where did you get the money?

Daddy sent us a
thousand dollars.

He won't give us a cent more
until you apologize.

Well, I'm not going
to apologize.

I told him it would be a cold
day in hell until you did.

Just give him some time.

Now, it says right...

here...

that it's made out of 80%
of the good stuff.

Right.

And only 20% of the
cheaper fabric

woven in, so you
don't even notice,

and I had them
put extra room in the crotch.

Okay.

Do you like it?

Yes, I love it.

I told the salesman
that it was for

a very important novelist

that the Book of the Month
Club was after.

Dena, I told you that, you know,

it's still in the
talking stages.

I'm sending out
positive vibrations.

I can see that.

Make love to me.

[ANDREA] Tobias brought me here
on our first date.

How did you meet him?

I went to interview him at
the house, and I never left.

It must have been
one hell of an interview.

[ANDREA] Tobias likes to have
youth around him,

says it keep him young.

What were you going to say?

It doesn't seem to be
working anymore.

His eyes are still young,

when he looks at me.

I guess that's all that matters.

♪ Well, I'm here to do
what I'm told ♪

♪ I'm taking
just your hand to hold ♪

♪ I hope she's proud of me ♪

♪ Don't let me down ♪

My husband says he's given you
a copy of the novel to read.

Yes.

He doesn't usually do that.

He must think very
highly of you.

He doesn't even know me.

And what did you think?

It's wonderful, right?

I think it's the best thing
he's ever written.

It's a piece of shit, isn't it?

Yes.

[ANDREA] Will you do
something for me?

Tell him.

Tell him what?

Tell him that it's no good.

[BYRON] I can't do that.

Well, then the critics will,

and it will kill him.

The only thing he has left
is his reputation,

and when he dies,
I want him holding on to it.

I don't know.

Please, Byron.

[BYRON] Mind if I sit down?

Mind if I don't stand up?

Nice ducks.

Yeah, well.

You know, I think we just...

are contributing to

their lackadaisical attitude.

Most people would
like to come back

as a bird in their next life.

Yeah, they don't know
what the hell

they're talking about.

It's a miserable existence.

I mean, living on handouts
and leftovers, for God's sake.

[BYRON] I guess it's the freedom
that flying represents.

Birds don't know that.

Flying to them is work.

Unless, of course,
you're an eagle or a hawk.

Soaring, soaring.

Now, soaring could be
pleasurable.

Yeah.

What would you like to
come back as?

[TOBIAS] I wouldn't.

I'll never have it better
than I did in this lifetime.

Never.

Most people can't say that.

[TOBIAS] Yeah, well...

It doesn't make it any
easier leaving it.

We'll feed the ducks.

You know, when I was working,

I could still feel that...
calling, you know,

and now that the book
is finished,

I just can't find a reason
for me any longer.

Did you read it?

Yes, I did.

And?

It's wonderful...

[SIGHS]

For a first draft.

Oh, goddamn it!

Jesus Christ.

Can't you take a little
healthy criticism?

What do you mean, "a
first draft"?

I mean, what the hell was it
that you didn't like about it?

Can we just talk
about this later?

No!

[BYRON] It stinks, okay?

It stin-- it stin...

[COUGHING]

The whole thing?

I'd rather not
get too specific at the moment.

I've got other
things on my mind.

Jesus Christ,
you might have broken my nose.

Well, show me.

Show me.

Not your nose!

Come on.

All right, you just show me

what's wrong with what
I've written.

I don't want to bleed on it.

[TOBIAS] My blood is
on every page,

now, goddamn it, you tell me
what's wrong with it.

You want me to tell you

what makes you
such a great writer?

I thought we agreed
it was genius.

That helps, but it's
the characters

that you actually write about.

They are so real that the reader
actually feels their flesh.

- Thank you.
- Yes, but this is 800 pages

on the fall of the Roman Empire,
for God's sakes.

- Well, it was well-researched.
- Who cares?

Oh, goddamn it.

Who the fuck are you to
criticize my work?

- I am nobody.
- Yes, exactly.

But a nobody can still be right.

Wait a second,

are you supposed to be drinking?

No, I'm not.

My doctor says it will kill me.

Let's hope he's right.

Look, I'm not saying that
what you have here is not great.

Well, you're saying it badly.

Well, I'm saying that
you might have

taken the wrong approach.

- Oh.
- What is the main theme

that you actually wanted
to write about?

That every social structure

makes slaves out of one
group or another.

That's terrific.

[TOBIAS] Oh, thank
you very much

for your approval.

[BYRON] So, what do you need
Roman slaves for?

What's wrong with them?

Nobody can identify with them.

Oh, are you telling me

that I've just wasted 12
years of my life?

No, what I'm saying is
that you could make your point

with any oppressed group.

God knows, there's
enough to pick from.

This could be the greatest novel
that you ever wrote.

Well, I already thought it was.

All you got to do is
get rid of the Roman slaves

and find yourself
another microcosm.

Blacks?

No.

Jews?

No.

Homosexuals?

No.

Who then?

Migrant workers.

Migrant workers.

[ANDREA MOANING]

[TOBIAS] Hmm? [CHUCKLES, SIGHS]

[TOBIAS CHUCKLING]

Oh, yeah. Come on, come on.

- [ANDREA PANTNG]
- [TOBIAS] Ah.

- [TOBIAS] Ah.
- [ANDREA GASPS]

Migrant workers?

Hah! Son of a bitch.

- Hey.
- Hi.

When did you get contacts?

The editor said that, uh,
the glasses,

they are probably what hurt
the sales of Hitler's Child.

I thought you said that
about the goatee?

You know, he sprung
for the contacts because he said

it would make me look

too intellectual
and scare people off.

Nobody wants to read a book and,
you know,

look up a word every
two minutes.

Why didn't he just
take the picture

without the glasses on?

I guess maybe the public
appearances. I don't know.

I know you like the glasses,
if you want...

Not really,

I just liked you with
all your defects.

[BYRON] You wanted to see me.

Do you know when I
was here last?

No.

Neither do I.

Beautiful, isn't it?

Makes you feel as if
anything is possible.

You know, I was bit of a
child prodigy.

Played Mozart by the
time I was seven.

Really?

Not the same as
actually being Mozart.

Not bad for a start,
don't you think?

[BYRON] What happened?

[LUTHER] I grew up.

Wolfgang never stood a chance.

I'm finding that regrets
don't do a person much good.

[LUTHER] You know, Byron,
this is a tricky business.

You're very lucky
to have a wife and family.

Don't let their love
slip through your fingers.

[LUTHER] Do you know why
I brought you here?

No, my darling, why?

This is where
I took you on our first date.

No, it isn't.

Well, the location is the same.

They tore the restaurant down.

LA's a tough place to
be romantic in.

You do all right.

You remember that new guy
I was telling you about?

Mm-hmm.

Well, I've just--
I've just cut a deal for him

that's going to bring in more
money than I've seen in years.

That's wonderful, darling.

And I've been thinking...

Oh, I love it when you think.
That's so sexy.

Well, if you don't use success
to enrich your life,

then you're just putting failure
into Gucci shoes.

I don't know what you mean.
Thank you.

No, let me get this one.

Thank you.

Here.

What's this?

It's the check
I made out to you last month.

I don't want it.

You're the only
woman in 30 years

I felt like I could
be myself with.

I don't want your money anymore,

I just want you.

I don't understand.

I want you to leave
your husband.

I want to marry you.

You must be out of your mind.

Why the hell would I do that?

Here, take this back.

What the hell are you
thinking about?

Come on, let's go.

Silly...

That's a good one.

[BYRON] Very nice.

This is wonderful.

Do you eat like this
every night?

No, no.

Thank you.

[ANDREA] Not every night.

Tonight's a celebration.

Welcome to the family.

I must say,

it was a most generous offer,

and I thank you.

Well, I don't know
how much time I have left,

but I'm going to spend it

seeing my beautiful wife happy.

Well, I'll certainly do
whatever I can.

Oh, you'll do
whatever she wants.

Right.

- Darling, you should tell him.
- Yes, darling.

So, Byron,

I'm going to need your help,
too.

Okay.

With my book.

Any suggestions I could offer...

No, no. I don't want
any suggestions.

They'll only annoy me.

I want you to help me
to rewrite it.

Yeah, okay.

You mean, like, together?

You make it sound like you're
gonna be sitting on my lap.

No, I like your ideas.

Andrea seems to trust you,

and Luther says that
you're a Yale man.

Well, you can't be all bad then.

Uh, 30 percent of the royalties,
co-authorship.

Co-authorship?

My name next to...

next to your name?

Possibly in the same
letter case.

[DENA] Byron, what are
we doing here?

[BYRON] Acclimating.

Acclimating.

We're even gonna have
your father over for dinner.

- Follow me.
- Byron, this is crazy.

How can we afford this?

[BYRON] Tobias Allcott
wants to write with me.

With me.

Dance with me.

[PETE YORN'S "JUST ANOTHER"
PLAYING]

♪ You and I,
we're two of a kind ♪

♪ I hate to say it

♪ But you'll never relate
What makes you tick ♪

♪ It makes me smile

♪ You said that
I should get away from it all ♪

♪ And bury my head in the sand
If I want to ♪

♪ I think you...

Let's, uh, put him in
a zoot suit.

♪ You were lying
Wide awake in the garden ♪

♪ Trying to get over
Your stardom ♪

♪ And I could never
See you depart us ♪

♪ And you're my baby

♪ You're just another girl ♪

♪ Just another girl

♪ I never mind the way
I had to see ya ♪

♪ My working on a day should
never explains why I see you ♪

♪ And I feel your pain

♪ I love to wear my work
Inside of my head ♪

♪ I can't complain ♪

♪ But you should never react
the way you did ♪♪

[NIGEL] Hello, Byron.

Well, I was out last night

with a woman
who had me sucking on her toes.

Does this look normal to you?

Cold sore.

Well, you'd think that at least

there would be some
places on a person

where they wouldn't
want company.

♪ And I could never
See you depart us ♪

♪ And you're my baby

[DENA] Guess what new words
Nathaniel learned today?

What?

"What the hell ever
happened to my daddy?"

That's not funny.

It wasn't meant to be.

I just need to finish
this chapter.

You can do it tomorrow.

You've got to spend
some time with us.

Dena, I need a few minutes.

Byron, please...

[BYRON] Don't you understand
what I'm doing here?

- Believe me, I've been trying.
- I just need some time.

This is our big break.

We were fine
with the little breaks, Byron.

Do you think that I enjoy
having to do it this way?

How many chances do you think
come along in a lifetime?

When there's an opportunity,
you have to grab it,

even if you hate
everything that comes with it,

and I hate this! I hate it!

But I'm doing it for you,

I'm doing it for Nathaniel!

[TOBIAS] Who is it?

[ANDREA] It's only me.

[TOBIAS] Oh, thank you, darling,
they're beautiful.

Are you feeling okay?

[TOBIAS] Tired.

You need to get some sleep.

Oh, no. I'm only tired
when my eyes are open.

Then when they're closed,
I just feel scared.

Where are you going?

I'm going up to the office
and see if I can't...

No, you can work later.

That's the problem.
I can't work.

When I think...

it's like... walking into
an empty room,

If there's anything good
filling the pages,

it's because of him.

Don't talk like that.

They say the saddest thing
is to outlive your children.

My talent was my child.

You're weary.

You have no respect
for the truth,

none.

It's what I love most about you.

[♪♪♪]

[SNORES]

Well done, well done.

I haven't heard any laughing.

What's wrong with her?

There's some funny
stuff in there.

Yeah, well,

she seldom laughs out loud
when she's reading.

It's her only imperfection.

You know, Andrea is the
only one of them

who I believe ever loved
me completely.

She overlooked my faults,

and I am sorry she did.

I, uh...if she hadn't,

I probably would have
done something about them.

Be careful of women who love you
just the way you are,

it's a sure sign they
settle too easily.

Ah.

It's, um...wonderful.

Wow.

Oh, thank you, darling.

[SIGHING QUIETLY]

[BYRON] Did you really like it?

I love it.

But do you think
it's commercial?

People always buy Tobias'
novels,

whether or not they read them.

It's the nice thing about
being an icon.

- Excuse me.
- Are you all right?

I couldn't sleep.

Are you feeling unwell?

Oh, I feel wonderful.

That's why I couldn't sleep.

I didn't want to
sleep through it.

What are you drinking?

Water, with just
enough malt in it

to take the metallic
taste away from it.

Ahh.

I, uh...I just wanted to...

tell you how grateful I am
to both of you...

and...good night.

Sleep well, my darling.

Do you need something?

I don't want to be
alone tonight.

Not tonight.

[ANDREA SPEAKS INDISTICTLY]

[TOBIAS] Ah, thank you, darling.

[♪♪♪]

Hi.

Are you going out?

I wanted to pick up Nathaniel
and go get something to eat,

have a chance to talk?

What would we talk about, Byron?

Where are you going?

Why don't you tell me where
you've been going every night?

You look at me and you tell me.

You are such a fucking asshole,

and I'm an asshole.

I was so fucking blind to it!

It's none of your business
where I'm going.

How are you?

[LUTHER] You know, pretty good.

- Mind if I sit down?
- [LUTHER] Go ahead.

You haven't been around much.

[BYRON] I've left you messages.

I've taken a bit of time off,
myself.

So, what's on your mind?

You said to me once that
you were married.

Yes.

While you were in the business?

Well, there was some
overlapping.

- And?
- And what?

Is that what wrecked
your marriage?

Relationships are complicated.

There's never just one thing
that ends them.

But you had told me that most of
your employees were married.

I didn't say happily.

You ought to learn
to listen for adjectives.

You know, now that I've
finished the book,

I have a little bit more
time on my hands.

I'd like to come by,
maybe have some lunch.

I won't be there.

I think it's time
I was leaving the business.

Maybe you should think of
doing the same.

I'm a writer now.

Remember, they're still
paying you as a whore.

Don't forget that.
They never do.

Bye-bye.

What are you going to do?

The best I can, I'd imagine.

[ANDREA] "And has it
another important object

to accomplish 10,000
years to come."

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

[TOBIAS] Come in.

Thought you might like some tea.

[ANDREA] Thank you,
that's very kind.

[TOBIAS] Thank you, Byron.
That's very nice of you.

Thank you.

[CLEARS THROAT]

[BYRON] Listen, I was wondering.

Yes?

When are you gonna give
your book to the publisher?

We were just talking about that,
weren't we?

Yes, well, we thought

it might be a good idea
if we waited until I died.

Excuse me, but what for?

Well, if we publish
posthumously,

I'm a red-hot ticket.

The critics will be
afraid to shit on me,

and the sales will go
through the roof.

No, no. Now, don't be upset.

I mean, my doctor says

I have a few weeks left,
a month at the most.

Now, it'll mean that
you're well taken care of,

and that will make me happy.

Thank you for the tea.

Byron, Byron, Byron,
wait a minute.

Yes.

If it will make you
feel any better,

I've already begun to
have chest pains.

Mark Twain, I liked him.

He always has a way of
turning a phrase,

- makes me feel good.
- Listen to this one.

"Did this drop fall
patiently during 5,000 years?

It is falling now,

it will still be falling

when all these things
should have sunk down.

The afternoon of history
and the twilight of tradition

have been swallowed up
in the thick night of oblivion."

[DEEP RUMBLING]

[ANDREA] I feel so foolish.

I couldn't think of a
word to say.

It was a beautiful service.

I was fortunate.

I said everything,I wanted to
say to him before he died.

You know, I'd like to
write a foreword to the book,

as my way of thanking him.

Would you like that?

Very much.

But it won't be necessary.

No, it's no trouble.

I really want to do it.
I'm very proud of our work.

Your work.

Yes, the novel is very
special to me.

Byron, I know this is
going to disappoint you,

but I wasn't privy to any deal
you made with my husband,

and as far as I can tell, you...

you never had a contract.

What are you saying?

Or any proof of a
verbal agreement.

Well, excuse me a second.

I wrote that book.

You understand.

Understand what? I
wrote that book.

I can't have any
name beside his.

Then everyone will
know he needed

help, and I can't have that.

You were the one who wanted to
hold off the publishing

until after he died.

I have to protect
his reputation,

and you made that possible.

Oh, yes, I did.

I gave up my life for this!

I gave up my life for this book,

and that's all you
can say to me?

Thank you for a wonderful time.

There's no-- There's
no fucking way

you're going to get
away with this!

You don't have a choice.

No?

Unless you want to
humiliate yourself.

Remember, you've been handsomely
paid for your services.

Please, don't hate me.

No.

If you'd ever been in love,
you'd understand.

Fuck you.

[EVA CASSIDY'S "SAY GOODBYE"
PLAYING]

♪ It's funny how the distance
Can make you feel close ♪

[AUTOMATED VOICE] The number
you have reached

is not in service at this time
and there is no new number.

Please be sure you have checked
the telephone directory.

♪ The weather is fine here
Perfect shade of blue ♪

♪ I guess that's why
I've been thinking of you ♪

♪ So I call you up

♪ Just to tell you why

♪ Why I left you ♪

♪ And said goodbye

♪ Ooh

♪ Must be the mood I'm in

♪ I'm thinking of you again ♪

♪ I call you up
just to tell you why ♪

♪ Why I left you ♪

♪ And said goodbye

♪ I know you're different now

♪ And I guess I changed too

♪ And I thought
what once was right ♪

♪ Was so wrong for you

[WOMAN] You must be the man
from Elysian Fields.

Is it that obvious?

I've made a reservation at
the Huntington.

[WOMAN] My husband eats there.

[BYRON] Well, we can go
someplace else.

[WOMAN] No, it won't matter.

He looks right through me.

[BYRON] That's impossible.

Thank you.

[BYRON] He's probably
just very busy at work.

[WOMAN] Yeah, so he tells me.

[BYRON] You know, when a
man is concerned,

taking care of his family,

sometimes his priorities
can get all scrambled,

but it has nothing to
do with love.

For what I'm paying you,

I expect you to be
on my side in everything.

Excuse me.

Now, I'm just going to
powder my nose.

I thought I'd bump
into you here.

- Having drinks?
- No, we're just leaving.

Who are you with?

She's Norma Van Ruden
of San Marino.

[LAUGHS] Christ.

What?

She's the one who likes
having her toes sucked.

Let me give you some advice.

Make it easy on yourself.

Do not take her dancing first,
okay?

Thanks.

Well, we've got to
watch each other's backs.

Who are you driving
around tonight?

Her.

What, we're not getting a room?

What makes a man do what you do?

I think of our mission as a way

of giving joy to others,
my darling.

Actually, I really need to
know the truth.

Well, it's simple.

Fucking is the last resort
for a man who feels impotent.

Thank you.

Good night.

Good night.

[LUTHER] This
business has a way of

making you look a little older,

and perhaps even a
notch or two wiser.

[♪♪♪]

[BYRON] Any thoughts?

I'll have the
linguini with clams.

Good choice. And you, sir?

What would you suggest?

Try the pasta primavera.

Not very convincing.

What is primavera?

Spring vegetables with pasta.

What, like squash?

Like squash.

Are those fresh?

Like spring.

Fine.

Take 10. I'll cover for you.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Well...

Sorry.

They're my set to the house.

I heard Dom gave you a job.

Yeah.

I figure that the only thing
I have a chance of getting back

is my self-respect.

Did it work?

It'd be a lot easier
without my clip-on bow tie.

How's my boy?

Oh, he's fine. Good.

He's talking a lot?

He asks about you.

Are you writing?

I'm, uh...

I'm having a little trouble
coming up with inspiration.

Have you eaten?

I have a dinner break
in 20 minutes.

Oh, I don't think so.

I have to get back.

I understand.

I just came to tell you

that Nathaniel and I moved
back into the old neighborhood.

I heard. I've been
trying to reach you.

But your phone is unlisted.

Yeah, well...

I guess I've just been
in that kind of a mood.

I'm so sorry.

- Dena.
- Good night, Byron.

This is Nathaniel's direct line.

[DOM] Wow, such a beauty.

You know how you two
look together?

How?

Natural.

You know, I've got to go
and calm down my wife,

because you know how she gets,
you know,

when nobody orders her specials.

It's not her fault.

Well, that's what I
keep telling her,

I say, "It's not your fault,"

but she's so sensitive,
you know...

It's the menu.

What's wrong with the menu?

You want me to be honest?

Just a little.

You have everything
sounding exactly the same.

The manicotti sounds like
the osso bucco.

You use the word "succulent"

to describe three
different dishes.

Oh...

You want me to look at it?

- I'll rewrite it.
- You'd do that for me?

I'm feeling inspired.

[LUTHER] I did see him
one more time.

It was about a year later.

He had written a novel
titledEclipse,

about a marriage falling apart.

I took a certain
pride in knowing

I'd helped ruin his life enough

to give him something
substantial to write about.

[BYRON] "In a moment,

she would turn
and he'd never see her again.

There were things that he knew
he should have said,

that he wanted to say,

but when he looked into
his wife's face,

all he could remember
was what the old man had said:

'Be careful of women
who are content

to love you just as you are.

It's a sure sign they
settle too easily.'

His wife loved him too much
to be willing to settle,

but he no longer
had the conscience to change.

He had convinced himself
that everything he was doing,

he was doing for her.

He had mastered the
fatal technique

of believing his own lies.

Then one day,
his wife and child were gone.

He had everything in the world
a man could ever need

except a reason to wake
up every morning.

That single split second
after you open your eyes,

and there's that
someone to turn to

who loves you,

who loves you even more

and holds you even tighter
through your defeats

than through your victories.

He poured himself
another scotch,

knowing then that he would spend
the rest of his life...

trying to gain that
split second back."

Thanks for coming.

- [WOMAN] Thank you.
- [BYRON] What's your name?

[YASMIN] Yasmin, with a "Y."

I really loved your book.

Oh, thank you.

- There you go.
- Thank you.

[BYRON] Thank you.

- Hi.
- Hi.

- [BYRON] What's your name?
- Georgette.

- Georgette.
- It was very touching.

[BYRON] Thank you.

I just wish she'd taken him back
in the end.

So do I.

I've been married three times,
and all I know

is when it's over, it's over.

You've got to know
when it's time to move on.

It's time.

The name?

Make it out to Nathaniel.

Did you read it?

Why couldn't you
say those things to me before?

I'm a writer.

[LUTHER] I'd spent years
trying to pleasure women.

He'd come to the conclusion

that what's important

is knowing how to
please only one.

Now, there's something
to write about.