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ROBOT CHICKEN 35 "THE MUNNERY"
[CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
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00:00:06,005 --> 00:00:17,751
TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP]
[TOOLS WHIRRING]
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>> IT'S ALIVE!
4
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>> HEH HEH HEH HEH!
5
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>> MOM! I FOUND DAD!
6
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>> THE UNITED STATES NAVY,
BATTLING A NEW FOE--
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LOW RECRUITMENT.
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SO REMEMBER "DON'T ASK,
DON'T TELL"?
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NOW WE'RE MORE "DON'T ASK"
THAN EVER BEFORE.
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00:00:57,257 --> 00:01:00,994
WHEN THEY WRITE YOUR LIFE STORY,
WILL ANYONE WANT TO READ IT?
11
00:01:01,060 --> 00:01:04,063
THEN PUT A CHAPTER IN THERE
ABOUT HAVING SEX WITH A MAN
12
00:01:04,129 --> 00:01:05,899
ON A SUBMARINE.
13
00:01:05,965 --> 00:01:07,500
THAT WOULD BE A NEAT BOOK.
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BOOYAH. THE NAVY.
15
00:01:10,470 --> 00:01:12,472
>> KNEEL BEFORE ZOD.
16
00:01:12,539 --> 00:01:15,775
LAY DOWN ON YOUR BACKS
BEFORE ZOD.
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NOW, USING YOUR LOWER
ABDOMINALS, RAISE YOUR LEGS AND
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00:01:19,045 --> 00:01:21,514
HOLD ON A 5-COUNT BEFORE ZOD.
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1 BEFORE ZOD, 2 BEFORE ZOD,
3 BEFORE ZOD...
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>> THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME.
21
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THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME.
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THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE--
[WIND BLOWING]
23
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>> OH, CRAP!
24
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THIS ISN'T WHAT I MEANT.
25
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>> WELL, TAN MY HIDE.
26
00:01:39,866 --> 00:01:41,935
LOOK WHO'S COME HOME.
27
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DWAYNE, GET ON OUT HERE
AND SEE WHAT THE CAT DRUG IN.
28
00:01:46,005 --> 00:01:51,277
>> WHY, RITA, I--
AW! MY LITTLE GIRL
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HAS FINALLY COME BACK TO ME.
30
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[SNIFFS]
YOU LOOK GOOD, CHILD.
31
00:01:58,451 --> 00:02:00,487
>> THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE
AUNTIE EM AND UNCLE HENRY'S.
32
00:02:00,553 --> 00:02:02,856
THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE
AUNTIE EM AND UNCLE HENRY'S.
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00:02:02,922 --> 00:02:05,191
>> COMING THIS FALL
FROM THE CREATORS OF "MONK,"
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00:02:05,258 --> 00:02:08,061
EVERYONE'S PARENTS' FAVORITE
OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE DETECTIVE,
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COMES "CORK," AMERICA'S FIRST
MENTALLY CHALLENGED
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00:02:10,763 --> 00:02:11,564
CRIME SLEUTH.
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00:02:11,631 --> 00:02:13,566
>> IT'S ANICA DORSEY,
THE BANK TELLER.
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00:02:13,633 --> 00:02:14,734
WE'RE ALL OUT OF LEADS, CORK.
39
00:02:14,801 --> 00:02:16,703
WHAT DO YOU MAKE
OF THE SITUATION?
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00:02:16,769 --> 00:02:18,103
>> HA HA! I'M A TORNADO!
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00:02:18,171 --> 00:02:21,407
I'M A TORNADO! HA HA HA!
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00:02:21,474 --> 00:02:24,577
[CRYING LOUDLY]
>> IT'S A WEDDING BAND.
43
00:02:24,644 --> 00:02:26,513
THIS YOUNG MAN JUST FOUND
OUR FIRST CLUE.
44
00:02:26,579 --> 00:02:27,714
>> GOOD JOB, CORK.
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00:02:27,780 --> 00:02:29,616
>> NO MORE GYM CLASS.
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[STAMMERING]
>> WHAT IS IT, CORK?
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00:02:31,751 --> 00:02:33,319
>> [STAMMERING]
>> IS IT A WIDOW AND HER
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00:02:33,386 --> 00:02:35,088
BOYFRIEND TRYING TO CASH IN
ON HER LATE HUSBAND'S
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INSURANCE POLICY?
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00:02:36,322 --> 00:02:37,257
>> NAH.
51
00:02:37,323 --> 00:02:38,892
>> IS IT A GANG OF OLD POKER
BUDDIES WHO DECIDED
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00:02:38,958 --> 00:02:40,860
TO KNOCK OVER A CASINO
FOR ONE LAST SHOT AT FORTUNE?
53
00:02:40,927 --> 00:02:41,861
>> NAH.
54
00:02:41,928 --> 00:02:44,364
>> DO YOU HAVE TO GO NUMBER-ONE?
55
00:02:44,430 --> 00:02:45,465
>> YEAH!
56
00:02:45,531 --> 00:02:47,367
>> OK. TAKE MY HAND.
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00:02:47,433 --> 00:02:51,371
NO MORE SODA FOR YOU TODAY, OK?
58
00:02:51,437 --> 00:02:53,039
HE'S GETTING AWAY!
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00:02:53,106 --> 00:02:55,975
>> [STAMMERING]
>> YOU WANT TO GO FASTER, CORK?
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00:02:56,042 --> 00:02:57,343
>> OK.
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00:02:57,410 --> 00:03:04,017
[ENGINE REVS]
[TIRES SCREECHING]
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00:03:04,083 --> 00:03:06,853
>> [CHEERING]
>> LOUD NOISES. NO NOISES.
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00:03:06,920 --> 00:03:08,721
>> YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME
ALIVE, CORK.
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00:03:08,788 --> 00:03:11,591
ONE MOVE, AND YOUR PRECIOUS
VOLUNTEER BIG SISTER IS GONNA
65
00:03:11,658 --> 00:03:13,326
HAVE A BULLET IN HER HEAD!
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00:03:13,393 --> 00:03:14,827
>> CORK, DO SOMETHING!
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00:03:14,894 --> 00:03:16,228
>> BOOBIES. HA HA HA.
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00:03:16,296 --> 00:03:20,400
>> CORK, QUICK! THE BAD MAN
TOOK YOUR STRETCH ARMSTRONG!
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00:03:20,466 --> 00:03:22,635
>> NO!
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00:03:22,702 --> 00:03:24,037
>> OW! OW! OW! OW!
71
00:03:24,103 --> 00:03:27,473
>> MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE!
72
00:03:27,540 --> 00:03:29,142
MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE!
73
00:03:29,208 --> 00:03:30,977
>> CORK, THAT'S ENOUGH.
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00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:32,145
CORK, THAT'S ENOUGH.
75
00:03:32,211 --> 00:03:32,912
CORK.
76
00:03:32,978 --> 00:03:34,747
>> MINE! MINE!
77
00:03:34,814 --> 00:03:37,517
>> CORK, THANKS TO YOUR
UNFLAPPABLE ENTHUSIASM
78
00:03:37,584 --> 00:03:40,587
AND SURPRISINGLY HANDY
CAPABLE STRENGTHS, THIS CITY
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00:03:40,653 --> 00:03:42,055
OWES YOU A GREAT DEBT.
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00:03:42,121 --> 00:03:44,958
AS A TOKEN OF OUR GRATITUDE,
YOU MAY NOW PICK OUT ONE TOY
81
00:03:45,024 --> 00:03:46,359
AT THE TOY STORE.
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00:03:46,426 --> 00:03:48,494
>> I WANT SPAGHETTI.
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00:03:48,561 --> 00:03:52,531
>> AAH!
84
00:03:52,599 --> 00:04:04,944
>> RELEASE THE DRAGON.
85
00:04:05,011 --> 00:04:07,847
>> AAH! AAH! AAH! AAH!
86
00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:11,084
>> I'M FREE. I'M FREE!
87
00:04:11,150 --> 00:04:12,819
OH, MY GOD!
88
00:04:12,885 --> 00:04:14,454
IT'S ALL SO BEAUTIFUL.
89
00:04:14,520 --> 00:04:19,993
I HONESTLY THOUGHT
I WOULD NEVER GET OUT.
90
00:04:20,059 --> 00:04:23,429
>> AAH!
91
00:04:23,496 --> 00:04:29,469
>> ♪ HEARTBREAK, IN THE MORNING
THERE'S HEARTBREAK
92
00:04:29,535 --> 00:04:37,909
MY KITTENS HAVE LEFT ME
AND THE FLOWERS ARE DEAD
93
00:04:37,977 --> 00:04:43,216
I HEAR LAUGHTER
BUT NEVER FOR ME
94
00:04:43,282 --> 00:04:50,156
NO, I'M ALONE
DUST AND REFUSE
95
00:04:50,223 --> 00:04:55,395
FILLS MY SOUL
SORROW
96
00:04:55,461 --> 00:05:03,236
EVERY MOMENT IS TORMENT
I CAN'T RECALL SUNSHINE
97
00:05:03,302 --> 00:05:11,077
AND ALL COLORS ARE GRAY
IN THE MIRROR
98
00:05:11,144 --> 00:05:15,815
I BEG FOR RELEASE
AND HEAR ITS SWEET CALL
99
00:05:15,882 --> 00:05:21,888
WHEN THE GATES OPEN
I WALK SLOWLY IN ♪
100
00:05:21,954 --> 00:05:24,190
>> IT'S JUST LIKE ANDY
ALWAYS TOLD ME--
101
00:05:24,257 --> 00:05:26,793
GET BUSY DYING, OR GET KRAKEN.
102
00:05:26,859 --> 00:05:34,467
>> I GOT NO BRAKES!
103
00:05:34,534 --> 00:05:36,736
>> ♪ FACES FILLED
WITH JOY AND CHEER
104
00:05:36,803 --> 00:05:39,806
WHAT A MAGICAL TIME OF YEAR
HOWDY HO
105
00:05:39,872 --> 00:05:45,211
IT'S WEASEL STOMPING DAY
NOW PUT YOUR VIKING HELMET ON
106
00:05:45,278 --> 00:05:47,447
SPREAD THAT MAYONNAISE
ON THE LAWN
107
00:05:47,513 --> 00:05:49,982
DON'T YOU KNOW
IT'S WEASEL STOMPING DAY?
108
00:05:50,049 --> 00:05:53,853
WEASEL STOMPING DAY
ALL THE LITTLE GIRLS AND BOYS
109
00:05:53,920 --> 00:05:56,055
LOVE THAT WONDERFUL
CRUNCHING NOISE
110
00:05:56,122 --> 00:05:58,124
YOU'LL KNOW WHAT
THIS DAY'S ABOUT
111
00:05:58,191 --> 00:06:00,393
WHEN YOU STOMP
A WEASEL'S GUTS RIGHT OUT
112
00:06:00,460 --> 00:06:03,696
SO COME ALONG AND HAVE A LAUGH
STOMP THEIR WEASELY
113
00:06:03,763 --> 00:06:05,698
SPINES IN HALF
GRAB YOUR BOOTS
114
00:06:05,765 --> 00:06:09,869
AND STOMP YOUR CARES AWAY
HIP HIP HOORAY
115
00:06:09,936 --> 00:06:19,912
IT'S WEASEL STOMPING DAY ♪
[WEASELS SQUEALING]
116
00:06:19,979 --> 00:06:30,623
IT'S WEASEL STOMPING DAY ♪
[WEASELS SQUEALING]
117
00:06:30,690 --> 00:06:33,726
♪ PEOPLE UP AND DOWN THE STREET
CRUSHING WEASELS
118
00:06:33,793 --> 00:06:36,963
BENEATH THEIR FEET
WHY WE DO IT, WHO CAN SAY?
119
00:06:37,029 --> 00:06:41,100
BUT IT'S SUCH A FESTIVE HOLIDAY
SO LET THE STOMPING FUN BEGIN
120
00:06:41,167 --> 00:06:43,436
BASH THEIR WEASELY
SKULLS RIGHT IN
121
00:06:43,503 --> 00:06:47,740
IT'S TRADITION
THAT MAKES IT OK
122
00:06:47,807 --> 00:06:49,909
HEY, EVERYONE,
IT'S WEASEL STOMPING
123
00:06:49,976 --> 00:06:52,011
WE'LL HAVE SOME FUN
ON WEASEL STOMPING
124
00:06:52,078 --> 00:06:56,315
PUT DOWN YOUR GUN
IT'S WEASEL STOMPING DAY
125
00:06:56,382 --> 00:07:01,254
HIP HIP HOORAY
IT'S WEASEL STOMPING DAY ♪
126
00:07:01,320 --> 00:07:02,755
>> WEASEL STOMPING DAY.
127
00:07:02,822 --> 00:07:03,856
>> HEY!
128
00:07:03,923 --> 00:07:07,827
>> WELL, HERE WE ARE,
FACE TO FACE.
129
00:07:07,894 --> 00:07:11,497
>> STARLIGHT, STAR BRIGHT,
FIRST STAR I SEE TONIGHT,
130
00:07:11,564 --> 00:07:16,803
I WISH I MAY, I WISH I MIGHT
HAVE THIS WISH I WISH TONIGHT.
131
00:07:16,869 --> 00:07:21,374
I WISH--
[RUMBLING]
132
00:07:21,440 --> 00:07:23,576
HOLY CRAP!
133
00:07:23,643 --> 00:07:26,646
I-I-I GOT TO TELL OSCAR.
134
00:07:26,712 --> 00:07:28,748
OSCAR!
135
00:07:28,815 --> 00:07:30,883
OSCAR! OSCAR!
136
00:07:30,950 --> 00:07:32,318
>> AAH!
137
00:07:32,385 --> 00:07:35,154
>> HEY, OSCAR, IT'S ME--KEVIN.
138
00:07:35,221 --> 00:07:36,722
>> OH, WHAT HAPPENED?
139
00:07:36,789 --> 00:07:39,692
>> I MADE A WISH ON THAT STAR.
140
00:07:39,759 --> 00:07:45,731
[RUMBLING]
>> DUDE, WE GOT TO TELL JIMMY.
141
00:07:45,798 --> 00:07:48,568
>> DUDES, WE'VE GOT
TO TELL LOUIS.
142
00:07:48,634 --> 00:07:50,603
>> LOUIS. HEY. HEY, LOUIS.
143
00:07:50,670 --> 00:07:54,507
>> [GASP]
>> MAKE A WISH. IT'LL COME TRUE.
144
00:07:54,574 --> 00:07:58,811
[RUMBLING]
>> A GIANT SQUID? YOU IDIOT.
145
00:07:58,878 --> 00:08:00,646
WE'RE NOT EVEN NEAR WATER.
146
00:08:00,713 --> 00:08:04,116
>> AW, CRAP! SORRY, GUYS.
147
00:08:04,183 --> 00:08:06,586
LET'S GO TELL TIMMY.
148
00:08:06,652 --> 00:08:08,421
>> EW!
149
00:08:08,487 --> 00:08:09,856
>> TIMMY! HEY, TIMMY!
150
00:08:09,922 --> 00:08:12,491
USE YOUR LASER CANNON
TO WAKE HIM UP.
151
00:08:12,558 --> 00:08:13,759
>> I HAVE A LASER CANNON?
152
00:08:13,826 --> 00:08:21,200
>> ALL GIANT ROBOTS
HAVE LASER CANNONS. DUH!
153
00:08:21,267 --> 00:08:22,468
>> HOLY CRAP!
154
00:08:22,535 --> 00:08:24,637
I HAVE A LASER CANNON!
155
00:08:24,704 --> 00:08:28,975
>> TIMMY! TIMMY! MAKE A WISH,
AND IT'LL COME TRUE.
156
00:08:29,041 --> 00:08:30,309
>> TIMMY?
157
00:08:30,376 --> 00:08:32,111
>> HEY, LET'S GO GET ZACH.
158
00:08:32,178 --> 00:08:34,447
>> ZACH, WAKE UP! WAKE UP, ZACH!
159
00:08:34,513 --> 00:08:41,254
>> MAKE A WISH,
AND IT'LL COME TRUE.
160
00:08:41,320 --> 00:08:42,355
>> JERKS.
161
00:08:42,421 --> 00:08:44,490
IT'S 3:00 IN THE MORNING.
162
00:08:44,557 --> 00:08:45,758
>> WANT TO PLAY DOCTOR?
163
00:08:45,825 --> 00:08:48,261
>> I DON'T HAVE INSURANCE.
164
00:08:48,327 --> 00:08:50,997
>> REPORT, MR. SCOTT.
165
00:08:51,063 --> 00:08:54,901
>> CAPTAIN, SOMEBODY TRADED
ALL OUR DILITHIUM CRYSTALS
166
00:08:54,967 --> 00:09:00,573
FOR PORNOGRAPHIC HOLOGRAMS.
167
00:09:00,640 --> 00:09:01,540
>> AND?
168
00:09:01,607 --> 00:09:03,876
>> WITH NO POWER,
ALL LIFE SUPPORT ON THE SHIP
169
00:09:03,943 --> 00:09:05,645
IS ABOUT TO FAIL.
170
00:09:05,711 --> 00:09:06,779
>> AND?
171
00:09:06,846 --> 00:09:09,015
>> OUR ONLY HOPE IS TO BEAM
DOWN TO THE NEAREST PLANET,
172
00:09:09,081 --> 00:09:12,318
BUT THERE IS ONLY ENOUGH POWER
TO SEND 5 PEOPLE.
173
00:09:12,385 --> 00:09:13,619
I CAN'T DO NO MORE.
174
00:09:13,686 --> 00:09:17,290
>> CAPTAIN, LOGIC DICTATES THAT
EACH OF THE 433 CREW MEMBERS--
175
00:09:17,356 --> 00:09:19,492
>> HEY! WHERE DID KIRK GO?
176
00:09:19,558 --> 00:09:22,094
OH, NO, HE DIDN'T.
177
00:09:22,161 --> 00:09:23,629
>> NO FAIR, JIM!
178
00:09:23,696 --> 00:09:27,266
>> NAH NAH NAH! YOINK!
179
00:09:27,333 --> 00:09:31,504
>> NOW THERE'S ONLY ENOUGH POWER
FOR 4 OF US TO BEAM OUT!
180
00:09:31,570 --> 00:09:32,571
>> I'M A DOCTOR.
181
00:09:32,638 --> 00:09:34,140
I HAVE TO GO.
182
00:09:34,206 --> 00:09:40,179
>> [OTHERS AGREEING]
>> UM...I HAVE A VAGINA.
183
00:09:40,246 --> 00:09:42,982
>> [OTHERS AGREEING]
>> A VAGINA COULD PROVE
184
00:09:43,049 --> 00:09:45,518
QUITE USEFUL.
185
00:09:45,584 --> 00:09:46,919
>> I'M TOBY, THE REDSHIRT.
186
00:09:46,986 --> 00:09:48,387
YOU NEED A REDSHIRT.
187
00:09:48,454 --> 00:09:49,889
YOU JUST DO.
188
00:09:49,956 --> 00:09:50,823
>> QUITE LOGICAL.
189
00:09:50,890 --> 00:09:53,326
>> SURE.
190
00:09:53,392 --> 00:09:56,429
ONLY ONE OF US
CAN GO, OLD FRIEND.
191
00:09:56,495 --> 00:09:58,731
>> WE SHALL HANDLE THIS
THE ONLY LOGICAL WAY.
192
00:09:58,798 --> 00:10:00,466
WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!
193
00:10:00,533 --> 00:10:05,071
>> DID YOU JUST TRY
THE VULCAN NERVE PINCH ON ME?
194
00:10:05,137 --> 00:10:06,672
>> NO.
195
00:10:06,739 --> 00:10:12,578
>> OOH! MY EYE!
196
00:10:12,645 --> 00:10:21,253
[ALARM BLARING]
>> OH, SNAP. IT LOOKS LIKE
197
00:10:21,320 --> 00:10:24,623
WE GOT SOME SORT OF DONNER PARTY
SITUATION UP IN HERE.
198
00:10:24,690 --> 00:10:25,658
>> DAMN IT, JIM.
199
00:10:25,725 --> 00:10:28,995
I'M A DOCTOR, NOT A--
>> A CANNIBAL. YES, WE KNOW.
200
00:10:29,061 --> 00:10:32,264
>> AM I REALLY THAT PREDICTABLE?
201
00:10:32,331 --> 00:10:33,733
>> CHAIN OF COMMAND, PEOPLE.
202
00:10:33,799 --> 00:10:35,534
SO I GUESS WE START BY EATING...
203
00:10:35,601 --> 00:10:38,170
LET'S SEE...
204
00:10:38,237 --> 00:10:40,039
>> AW, HELL, NO.
205
00:10:40,106 --> 00:10:41,207
YOU KNOW WHAT?
206
00:10:41,273 --> 00:10:42,708
[BEEP] ALL Y'ALL.
207
00:10:42,775 --> 00:10:44,076
>> IT IS YOUR DUTY.
208
00:10:44,143 --> 00:10:45,444
>> SCREW THAT!
209
00:10:45,511 --> 00:10:48,347
ON BEHALF OF ALL THE REDSHIRTS
THAT FELL BEFORE ME,
210
00:10:48,414 --> 00:10:52,451
IT MAKES ME VERY, VERY PROUD
TO SPEAK THE FOLLOWING SENTENCE.
211
00:10:52,518 --> 00:10:55,888
[INHALES DEEPLY]
I'M THE ONLY ONE
212
00:10:55,955 --> 00:10:57,523
THAT BROUGHT A GUN.
213
00:10:57,590 --> 00:10:59,025
>> UH-OH.
214
00:10:59,091 --> 00:11:06,298
[PHASER FIRING]
>> MMM! THAT'S GOOD HAM.
215
00:11:06,365 --> 00:11:10,169
[CHICKENS CLUCKING]
[CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
216
00:11:10,236 --> 00:11:12,938
TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP]
[CAPTIONED BY NATIONAL
217
00:11:13,005 --> 00:11:14,006
CAPTIONING INSTITUTE
--www.ncicap.org--]
14402
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