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- ♪ MTV ♪
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[both chuckling]
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[bluesy rock music]
4
00:00:13,883 --> 00:00:21,064
♪ ♪
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- Butt-Head, it's my turn
to ride the scooter.
6
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- We don't take turns, Beavis.
We're not girls.
7
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- Oh, yeah, I forgot.
Taking turns sucks.
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- Check it out, Beavis.
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Those dudes have beers.
10
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Let's go party with them.
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- I don't know, Butt-Head.
12
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I think you have to be, like,
an American or something
13
00:00:49,136 --> 00:00:50,659
to go in there.
14
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- Uh, don't worry, dumbass.
We can blend in.
15
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- Hold on there, boys.
16
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This here's the Legion Hall,
17
00:00:59,842 --> 00:01:03,193
and we're having a special
get-together for Flag Day.
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00:01:03,280 --> 00:01:05,500
Service members only.
19
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- Uh, we're members.
20
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- Yeah, yeah,
we're from America.
21
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- Well, I'm glad to hear it,
but I'm talking about people
22
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who laid it all on the line
for this great country.
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Were you in the service?
- Uh, yeah.
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We did, like, service.
25
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- Thank you, drive through.
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Would you like the combo
for a dollar more?
27
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- You boys wore the uniform?
28
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- Yeah, we had
to wear a uniform.
29
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There was a hat and everything.
30
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- It was, like,
a long time ago,
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but I remember
that the training sucked,
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and it was always hot,
33
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and you never knew
when a bunch of guys
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would be all on your ass.
35
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- Yeah, there was one time
when the shake machine--
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- Enough said, boys.
37
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Save the war stories
for your fellow servicemen.
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Come on in,
and enjoy the company.
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- Kickass.
- Oh, yeah.
40
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[both chuckling]
41
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- Well, I tell you,
there's no better way
42
00:02:02,861 --> 00:02:06,038
to celebrate Flag Day than
with a couple of cold ones.
43
00:02:06,126 --> 00:02:07,388
- Give me another beer.
44
00:02:07,475 --> 00:02:10,304
- Yeah, more of these nuts too.
45
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- Say, have y'all met
Belvis and Bunhowzen here?
46
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They served in--I guess
it'd be the Desert Storm?
47
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- Yeah, like I was saying,
there's that one time
48
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the shake machine--
49
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- Did Gilmore tell you
the story
50
00:02:23,882 --> 00:02:26,668
about how he captured
that there flag in Vietnam?
51
00:02:26,755 --> 00:02:30,019
- Uh, no.
52
00:02:30,106 --> 00:02:33,762
- Well, we were hoofing it
through that godforsaken jungle
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when, all of a sudden,
the commies opened fire.
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- Fire, fire, fire!
55
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- You're still feeling it,
ain't ya?
56
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- Yeah, he feels it
all the time.
57
00:02:45,774 --> 00:02:49,734
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, boing!
58
00:02:49,821 --> 00:02:53,085
- I got a buddy who was
in Desert Storm.
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What battalion were you in?
60
00:02:55,262 --> 00:02:57,786
- Uh...
- What?
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- I said,
what battalion were you in?
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00:03:01,050 --> 00:03:03,313
- What's your battalion
number, boys?
63
00:03:03,400 --> 00:03:04,923
- Uh...
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69.
65
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[both chuckle]
66
00:03:09,058 --> 00:03:10,407
- Yeah, that's it.
67
00:03:10,494 --> 00:03:12,714
- The Fighting 69th.
68
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Oh, you guys are the real deal.
69
00:03:15,543 --> 00:03:17,153
- Must have seen
a lot of action.
70
00:03:17,240 --> 00:03:21,418
- Yeah, we like action.
71
00:03:21,505 --> 00:03:23,551
- Well, when you're in the 69,
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you're gonna get plenty
of action when it's going down.
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[both laughing]
74
00:03:28,338 --> 00:03:30,427
- Oh, boy, yeah.
75
00:03:30,514 --> 00:03:32,908
- They could lick anybody.
76
00:03:35,867 --> 00:03:38,435
- I heard in Iraq,
the 69 saw action
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00:03:38,522 --> 00:03:40,611
from both sides at once.
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00:03:40,698 --> 00:03:42,352
- Yeah, that's why
they call it that.
79
00:03:42,439 --> 00:03:44,702
Here, I'll draw you a picture.
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00:03:44,789 --> 00:03:46,574
Butt-Head explained it
to me once.
81
00:03:46,661 --> 00:03:48,837
See, the bottom
of the six is the butt.
82
00:03:48,924 --> 00:03:52,362
And then the nine is, like,
the nads or something.
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00:03:52,449 --> 00:03:53,363
I don't know.
84
00:03:57,585 --> 00:04:00,501
[both chuckling]
85
00:04:02,111 --> 00:04:04,113
- You can fool
those old men in there,
86
00:04:04,200 --> 00:04:05,593
but you can't fool me.
87
00:04:05,680 --> 00:04:08,073
You were never in the 69th.
88
00:04:08,160 --> 00:04:09,771
You guys are lying.
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00:04:09,858 --> 00:04:12,339
- Uh, okay.
90
00:04:12,426 --> 00:04:14,297
- And I know why.
91
00:04:14,384 --> 00:04:15,951
You're CIA.
92
00:04:16,038 --> 00:04:17,866
- Uh, what's that?
93
00:04:17,952 --> 00:04:20,476
- The C who?
94
00:04:20,564 --> 00:04:22,479
- I get it.
95
00:04:22,566 --> 00:04:24,742
You're still keeping
your cover, even now.
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00:04:24,829 --> 00:04:26,744
Cool, come on, drinks on me.
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00:04:26,831 --> 00:04:29,269
If anybody's earned it,
it's you two.
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00:04:29,356 --> 00:04:31,880
- Whoa, serving rocks.
99
00:04:31,967 --> 00:04:35,449
[both chuckling]
100
00:04:35,536 --> 00:04:37,973
- So what'd you guys do,
covert ops,
101
00:04:38,060 --> 00:04:39,670
military intelligence?
102
00:04:39,757 --> 00:04:42,194
- Uh, probably intelligence.
103
00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:44,849
It's, like,
one of our specialties.
104
00:04:44,936 --> 00:04:46,982
- Yeah, there was this one time
when the shake machine--
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- Belvis, Bunhowzen,
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00:04:48,723 --> 00:04:51,291
I think I speak for everyone
when I say,
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00:04:51,378 --> 00:04:53,597
it'd be a real honor
to have you be part
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00:04:53,683 --> 00:04:55,817
of our Flag Day ceremony
109
00:04:55,904 --> 00:04:59,821
and raise Old Glory
up on the pole out there.
110
00:04:59,908 --> 00:05:02,563
- Raise.
[both chuckle]
111
00:05:02,650 --> 00:05:04,652
- Pole.
112
00:05:04,739 --> 00:05:06,480
- Well, thank you.
113
00:05:06,567 --> 00:05:10,310
This beauty dates back
to the Spanish-American War.
114
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She's a bona fide piece
of American history.
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We'll wait outside,
give y'all some time
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to get ready and whatnot.
117
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- Let's do it, boys.
- Yes, sir.
118
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- History sucks.
119
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[both chuckle]
- Yeah, really.
120
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- Oh, I'm looking forward
to watching this video.
121
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Fiat presents Ava Max, "Torn."
122
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[both chuckling]
- Okay.
123
00:05:39,251 --> 00:05:41,558
- ♪ Li-li-light away ♪
124
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♪ But, but then you give me
fireworks ♪
125
00:05:43,734 --> 00:05:46,607
- How come they keep showing
this car?
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00:05:46,694 --> 00:05:49,871
- Well, Beavis, that's because
it's the Fiat 500X,
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00:05:49,957 --> 00:05:52,439
the best mid-sized Sedan
on the market today.
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00:05:52,526 --> 00:05:53,657
♪ ♪
129
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- Really?
130
00:05:55,224 --> 00:05:57,879
- That's right, Beavis.
131
00:05:57,966 --> 00:05:59,837
- I guess it looks
pretty cool, you know,
132
00:05:59,924 --> 00:06:01,535
but it seems like
a car like that,
133
00:06:01,622 --> 00:06:02,753
like, a four-door,
wouldn't have a whole lot
134
00:06:02,840 --> 00:06:04,538
of pickup, you know,
at the lights.
135
00:06:04,625 --> 00:06:08,106
- That's where you're wrong,
Beavis, stupid and wrong.
136
00:06:08,193 --> 00:06:11,240
The Fiat's 1.3 liter
multi-air turbo engine
137
00:06:11,327 --> 00:06:12,720
comes standard and is equipped
138
00:06:12,807 --> 00:06:15,636
with fuel saving engine
stop-start technology,
139
00:06:15,723 --> 00:06:20,510
offering 177 horsepower
to dominate the road ahead.
140
00:06:20,597 --> 00:06:22,947
- Wow, really?
That sounds amazing!
141
00:06:23,034 --> 00:06:27,169
But it is a little hard
to believe, you know?
142
00:06:27,256 --> 00:06:32,435
- Well, the Fiat 500X will make
a believer out of you, dumbass.
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00:06:32,522 --> 00:06:34,872
And you know what's
even more shocking, Beavis?
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00:06:34,959 --> 00:06:37,484
You won't have sticker shock.
145
00:06:37,571 --> 00:06:39,137
- I don't know what that is,
146
00:06:39,224 --> 00:06:42,576
so I probably won't have it
anyway.
147
00:06:42,663 --> 00:06:44,273
- Damn it, Beavis.
148
00:06:44,360 --> 00:06:46,144
Sticker shock means,
like, it's super expensive.
149
00:06:46,231 --> 00:06:49,017
And the Fiat 500X
is very affordable.
150
00:06:49,104 --> 00:06:51,367
♪ ♪
151
00:06:51,454 --> 00:06:54,326
- But it's probably, like,
made in some foreign country,
152
00:06:54,414 --> 00:06:56,590
like over in Europe
or something.
153
00:06:56,677 --> 00:06:58,069
- Most of the parts
are made right here
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00:06:58,156 --> 00:06:59,767
in the good old USA,
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00:06:59,854 --> 00:07:02,683
providing jobs to people
like you and me.
156
00:07:02,770 --> 00:07:07,644
- What, like you and me?
We don't even have jobs.
157
00:07:07,731 --> 00:07:10,647
- No, we don't,
and we never will.
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00:07:10,734 --> 00:07:13,955
But if we did, we'd be
working on the Fiat 500X,
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00:07:14,042 --> 00:07:16,479
which "Car and Driver"
recently called
160
00:07:16,566 --> 00:07:19,743
"the ultimate thrill ride."
161
00:07:19,830 --> 00:07:23,486
Could you see yourself driving
this car, Beavis?
162
00:07:23,573 --> 00:07:26,228
- What does this car have
to offer someone like me,
163
00:07:26,315 --> 00:07:29,187
who had his license suspended?
164
00:07:29,274 --> 00:07:32,364
- Uh, it offers you nothing.
165
00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:34,497
Fiat doesn't want you.
166
00:07:34,584 --> 00:07:36,717
The Fiat is for winners only.
167
00:07:36,804 --> 00:07:39,720
Do you see yourself
with a bus pass,
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while I bang your mom
in the back seat
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00:07:41,983 --> 00:07:46,466
of the Fiat 500X,
with its roomy interior.
170
00:07:46,553 --> 00:07:49,251
Again, just like your mom.
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00:07:49,338 --> 00:07:52,863
[both chuckling]
172
00:07:52,950 --> 00:07:54,212
- Shut up, Butt-Head.
173
00:07:54,299 --> 00:07:57,215
- Uh, hey, Beavis.
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00:07:57,302 --> 00:07:58,826
Look outside and check and see
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00:07:58,913 --> 00:08:00,828
if there's a free Fiat
out there.
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00:08:00,915 --> 00:08:02,960
♪ ♪
177
00:08:03,047 --> 00:08:05,789
- Why would Fiat give you
a free car?
178
00:08:05,876 --> 00:08:08,488
- Just go look.
179
00:08:08,575 --> 00:08:12,666
See if you see a Fiat 500X.
180
00:08:12,753 --> 00:08:14,363
- I don't see anything,
Butt-Head.
181
00:08:14,450 --> 00:08:16,800
- Uh, are you sure?
182
00:08:16,887 --> 00:08:20,108
- Yep, no cars
out here at all.
183
00:08:20,195 --> 00:08:23,154
- Damn it, never mind.
184
00:08:23,241 --> 00:08:25,287
Fiats suck.
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00:08:25,374 --> 00:08:27,376
♪ ♪
186
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It's a tiny crap wagon.
187
00:08:29,857 --> 00:08:32,599
♪ ♪
188
00:08:32,686 --> 00:08:34,426
- You'd never fit
in one anyway, Butt-Head,
189
00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:36,515
'cause you're too fat.
190
00:08:36,602 --> 00:08:39,344
- [chuckles]
Yeah.
191
00:08:46,003 --> 00:08:49,267
- Dang it,
where are those two boys?
192
00:08:49,354 --> 00:08:51,705
- They probably wanted
their speech to be just so.
193
00:08:51,792 --> 00:08:55,796
Ah, they're fightin' men,
not talking men.
194
00:08:55,883 --> 00:08:58,712
- Huh, well,
that's mighty nice of 'em.
195
00:09:01,279 --> 00:09:04,239
[both chuckle]
196
00:09:04,326 --> 00:09:06,720
- Hey, Butt-Head,
wasn't there, like,
197
00:09:06,807 --> 00:09:09,810
something we were gonna do
or something?
198
00:09:09,897 --> 00:09:12,290
- Uh, oh, yeah.
199
00:09:12,377 --> 00:09:14,554
I think we were gonna,
like, hang a flag
200
00:09:14,641 --> 00:09:16,773
on a pole thing or something.
201
00:09:16,860 --> 00:09:19,689
- Oh, yeah, yeah,
where'd the flag go?
202
00:09:19,776 --> 00:09:21,691
- Uh...
203
00:09:21,778 --> 00:09:24,825
it's gotta be around here
somewhere.
204
00:09:24,912 --> 00:09:29,177
- Oh, there it is.
- Oh, yeah, that's it.
205
00:09:29,264 --> 00:09:31,701
- Old Glory.
206
00:09:31,788 --> 00:09:33,703
♪ Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun,
dun-dun-dun-dun ♪
207
00:09:36,227 --> 00:09:38,273
- Oh, here they come.
208
00:09:39,404 --> 00:09:42,494
[rousing bugle playing]
209
00:09:42,582 --> 00:09:43,887
- You know,
I like this bar, Butt-Head.
210
00:09:43,974 --> 00:09:45,976
People are really nice here,
you know?
211
00:09:46,063 --> 00:09:49,980
- Yeah, they're, like,
all American and stuff.
212
00:09:50,067 --> 00:09:52,026
- Yep.
213
00:09:52,113 --> 00:09:54,376
- God damn it.
- What the hell?
214
00:09:54,463 --> 00:09:57,553
- Dear God.
- You gotta be kidding me.
215
00:09:57,640 --> 00:10:00,469
- Did they just fly
the Vietcong flag
216
00:10:00,556 --> 00:10:02,776
over the American Legion Hall?
217
00:10:02,863 --> 00:10:05,126
- Can you, like,
get us some more beer now?
218
00:10:05,213 --> 00:10:07,476
- Yeah, yeah, yeah,
considering we just put
219
00:10:07,563 --> 00:10:08,738
your flag up for free.
220
00:10:08,825 --> 00:10:11,175
- Stolen valor!
- God dang it!
221
00:10:11,262 --> 00:10:13,003
- I'll kick your ass.
222
00:10:13,090 --> 00:10:15,049
- This one's for Ho Chi Minh,
223
00:10:15,136 --> 00:10:18,705
you son of a bitchin' bastard.
224
00:10:18,792 --> 00:10:21,011
- Hey, Butt-Head.
225
00:10:21,098 --> 00:10:23,927
Since we're
on this flagpole now,
226
00:10:24,014 --> 00:10:27,061
I guess that means,
like, we're Americans.
227
00:10:27,148 --> 00:10:29,063
- Uh...
228
00:10:29,150 --> 00:10:30,934
I guess we are.
229
00:10:31,021 --> 00:10:34,372
[both chuckling]
230
00:10:34,459 --> 00:10:37,201
- I guess you had to be
in the Army to join that place.
231
00:10:37,288 --> 00:10:39,769
- Probably.
232
00:10:44,731 --> 00:10:47,603
[bluesy rock music]
233
00:10:47,690 --> 00:10:51,346
♪ ♪
234
00:10:55,437 --> 00:10:59,049
- Um, I don't think
it's gonna happen, Butt-Head.
235
00:10:59,136 --> 00:11:01,443
- Just be patient, Beavis.
236
00:11:01,530 --> 00:11:03,401
It'll happen.
237
00:11:03,488 --> 00:11:05,360
- Come on, Butt-Head.
We've been waiting too long.
238
00:11:05,447 --> 00:11:07,405
Let's go--whoa!
Whoa, it's happening.
239
00:11:07,492 --> 00:11:09,538
It's really happening.
240
00:11:09,625 --> 00:11:12,410
- I told you so, Beavis.
241
00:11:12,497 --> 00:11:14,804
- That teddy bear's
taking a dump.
242
00:11:14,891 --> 00:11:17,415
- Worth the wait.
243
00:11:17,502 --> 00:11:18,852
- Plop.
244
00:11:18,939 --> 00:11:20,331
- Hey.
245
00:11:20,418 --> 00:11:21,593
Is that your dog?
246
00:11:21,681 --> 00:11:24,466
- Uh, no.
247
00:11:24,553 --> 00:11:26,598
- That was a dog?
248
00:11:26,686 --> 00:11:30,515
- Typical, these rich jerks pay
$5,000 for a designer dog.
249
00:11:30,602 --> 00:11:32,300
Then they don't
pick up after it.
250
00:11:32,387 --> 00:11:36,217
- Whoa, $5,000?
251
00:11:37,261 --> 00:11:39,394
- Yeah, they crossbreed
two types of dogs.
252
00:11:39,481 --> 00:11:41,309
Then they sell the puppies
for thousands
253
00:11:41,396 --> 00:11:43,790
while regular dogs rot
in the pound.
254
00:11:43,877 --> 00:11:45,966
- Beavis, did you hear that?
255
00:11:46,053 --> 00:11:48,925
- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah,
he said "pound."
256
00:11:49,012 --> 00:11:51,580
- No, dumbass, that guy said
if we can get a dog
257
00:11:51,667 --> 00:11:53,234
to score with another dog,
258
00:11:53,321 --> 00:11:55,889
people will give us money
for the dog babies.
259
00:11:55,976 --> 00:11:58,805
- Whoa, really?
That's cool.
260
00:11:58,892 --> 00:12:01,372
- Beavis,
we must begin breeding.
261
00:12:03,244 --> 00:12:06,813
Breeding means score.
[both chuckle]
262
00:12:08,597 --> 00:12:12,296
I saw a dog around here
yesterday.
263
00:12:12,383 --> 00:12:14,559
- Was it in a tree
or something?
264
00:12:14,646 --> 00:12:18,172
- Whoa, there it is.
265
00:12:21,088 --> 00:12:23,917
- I thought that was,
like, a bear or something.
266
00:12:24,004 --> 00:12:26,223
- Well, it's a dog now.
267
00:12:26,310 --> 00:12:28,922
As long as it's got four legs
and a schlong,
268
00:12:29,009 --> 00:12:32,360
it's gonna score
until we get $5,000.
269
00:12:32,447 --> 00:12:34,971
- Lucky bastard.
270
00:12:35,058 --> 00:12:36,930
- Get him, Beavis.
271
00:12:38,540 --> 00:12:41,282
- Hey there, doggie.
272
00:12:41,369 --> 00:12:42,718
Good boy or something.
273
00:12:42,805 --> 00:12:44,807
Who's a good--ow!
274
00:12:44,894 --> 00:12:47,244
Ahh, bad dog!
Damn it!
275
00:12:47,331 --> 00:12:49,507
Son of a bitch, ahh!
Butt-Head, help me!
276
00:12:49,594 --> 00:12:51,118
Ahh, Butt-Head, help!
277
00:12:51,205 --> 00:12:52,859
- Damn it, Beavis,
don't hurt its schlong.
278
00:12:52,946 --> 00:12:56,514
- I'll kick your ass!
- He needs it to score.
279
00:12:56,601 --> 00:12:59,213
- Damn it, ahh!
280
00:13:01,389 --> 00:13:03,434
- We got him where we want him,
Beavis.
281
00:13:03,521 --> 00:13:05,872
Now get in there.
282
00:13:05,959 --> 00:13:07,482
- I don't know, Butt-Head.
283
00:13:07,569 --> 00:13:09,614
He's kind of, like,
mad or something.
284
00:13:09,701 --> 00:13:11,225
- He's not mad.
285
00:13:11,312 --> 00:13:12,835
He just wants us
to take him to the park,
286
00:13:12,922 --> 00:13:16,143
so he can, like, get busy.
287
00:13:16,230 --> 00:13:19,581
- Really?
'Cause he seems kind of mad.
288
00:13:19,668 --> 00:13:22,279
Let me see.
289
00:13:22,366 --> 00:13:24,499
Ow, ahh!
290
00:13:24,586 --> 00:13:28,111
- Okay, Beavis, get in there
and gain his trust.
291
00:13:28,198 --> 00:13:30,505
- Butthole, ahh!
292
00:13:30,592 --> 00:13:32,550
- You better not be hurting
its schlong in there.
293
00:13:32,637 --> 00:13:35,379
- Ahh, ahh!
294
00:13:35,466 --> 00:13:38,165
- We're gonna be millionaires.
295
00:13:43,213 --> 00:13:45,259
- Damn it, Beavis,
keep him under control.
296
00:13:45,346 --> 00:13:48,784
He's gonna scare off
all the hot dog chicks.
297
00:13:48,871 --> 00:13:52,266
- Quiet down, boy.
You know what I'm saying?
298
00:13:52,353 --> 00:13:54,703
Good boy.
299
00:13:55,660 --> 00:13:59,926
- Uh, hello lady dogs.
300
00:14:00,013 --> 00:14:02,450
- How do we make our dog,
like, want to score?
301
00:14:02,537 --> 00:14:04,582
- Our dog is cool, Beavis.
302
00:14:04,669 --> 00:14:07,803
It wants to score all the time
like a normal person.
303
00:14:07,890 --> 00:14:10,023
- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, me too.
304
00:14:10,110 --> 00:14:11,981
We taught him well.
305
00:14:12,068 --> 00:14:15,289
- We need to find, like,
the perfect chick dog,
306
00:14:15,376 --> 00:14:18,640
and then, like,
let nature take its course.
307
00:14:22,122 --> 00:14:24,733
- So which dog should
our dog score with?
308
00:14:27,083 --> 00:14:30,826
- Uh, too dirty.
309
00:14:30,913 --> 00:14:34,308
- Looks like it's made
out of nut sack.
310
00:14:34,395 --> 00:14:39,443
- Uh, that one will, like,
scare his boner off.
311
00:14:39,530 --> 00:14:41,010
- Aw, that one seems nice.
312
00:14:41,097 --> 00:14:42,490
She's got a nice face,
you know.
313
00:14:42,577 --> 00:14:46,798
- We want him to score with it,
not marry it.
314
00:14:46,886 --> 00:14:48,888
- That one's got nice hair.
315
00:14:50,846 --> 00:14:54,545
- Uh, I think she's,
like, taken or something.
316
00:14:54,632 --> 00:14:57,984
[both chuckling]
317
00:14:58,071 --> 00:15:01,030
- Whoa.
- Ooh, yeah.
318
00:15:01,117 --> 00:15:03,076
That's what I'm talking about.
319
00:15:03,163 --> 00:15:04,860
- That dog is hot.
320
00:15:04,947 --> 00:15:08,820
- It's like boi-oi-oi-oing!
321
00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:12,085
- Come to Butt-Head's dog.
322
00:15:12,172 --> 00:15:14,870
Well, polish up
your dog schlong
323
00:15:14,957 --> 00:15:18,395
because you're about to score.
324
00:15:18,482 --> 00:15:19,875
- Hey, best pal-y.
I'm Ali.
325
00:15:19,962 --> 00:15:22,095
And you may remember me
from such things
326
00:15:22,182 --> 00:15:23,966
as covering my car
in blue AstroTurf.
327
00:15:24,053 --> 00:15:26,229
Well, as I've been driving
my fake grass around,
328
00:15:26,316 --> 00:15:28,014
I couldn't help but think,
fake is good,
329
00:15:28,101 --> 00:15:30,277
but living is more outrageous.
330
00:15:30,364 --> 00:15:33,410
Can I turn my car
into a giant Chia Pet.
331
00:15:33,497 --> 00:15:37,110
- Uh, oh, boy.
332
00:15:38,328 --> 00:15:40,287
- Wow.
333
00:15:40,374 --> 00:15:44,595
You think this girl ever, like,
gets tired of herself?
334
00:15:44,682 --> 00:15:48,338
- No, 'cause I think other
people being tired of her
335
00:15:48,425 --> 00:15:50,340
gives her energy.
336
00:15:50,427 --> 00:15:53,343
- She, like, feeds off of it.
337
00:15:53,430 --> 00:15:55,258
- This is a car-pet,
but I want to cultivate
338
00:15:55,345 --> 00:15:56,999
a lush, growing car-den.
339
00:15:57,086 --> 00:15:59,088
- She's trying to, like,
be entertaining
340
00:15:59,175 --> 00:16:02,135
with every single word
she says.
341
00:16:02,222 --> 00:16:06,182
- She just never talks in
a normal voice or a normal way.
342
00:16:06,269 --> 00:16:11,840
- It's like this entire video
is one long sentence.
343
00:16:11,927 --> 00:16:16,453
- Yeah, life sentence,
I tell ya.
344
00:16:16,540 --> 00:16:20,327
- I bet she's, like,
really difficult to watch.
345
00:16:20,414 --> 00:16:25,071
- Yeah, yeah, uh, we are
watching her, Butt-Head.
346
00:16:25,158 --> 00:16:28,030
- And it is difficult.
I was right.
347
00:16:29,814 --> 00:16:32,078
- And, of course,
into vans that you rent
348
00:16:32,165 --> 00:16:33,818
and drive Lyft around.
349
00:16:33,905 --> 00:16:36,386
- She's quirky.
350
00:16:36,473 --> 00:16:39,346
- I'm glad I'm not quirky.
351
00:16:39,433 --> 00:16:41,348
- Me too.
352
00:16:41,435 --> 00:16:44,829
- I have no quirks,
and I'm happy about it.
353
00:16:45,917 --> 00:16:48,790
I mean,
I still sniff glue sometimes,
354
00:16:48,877 --> 00:16:50,400
but that's not really a quirk,
you know.
355
00:16:50,487 --> 00:16:53,577
It's more like,
you know, an addiction.
356
00:16:54,491 --> 00:16:55,797
- Still been too busy coming up
with dumb ideas
357
00:16:55,884 --> 00:16:57,842
and then executing them.
358
00:16:57,929 --> 00:17:00,584
- I don't know how she lives
with herself, really.
359
00:17:00,671 --> 00:17:05,154
- Uh, yeah, I think,
in between every shot,
360
00:17:05,241 --> 00:17:07,722
she sleeps for like 22 hours.
361
00:17:07,809 --> 00:17:09,419
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
362
00:17:09,506 --> 00:17:12,204
- I got 30 pounds of chia,
and I thought,
363
00:17:12,291 --> 00:17:14,771
that might be too much,
so I made it 60 pounds
364
00:17:14,858 --> 00:17:16,122
just to be sure it's too much.
365
00:17:16,209 --> 00:17:17,819
- Like, your mouth works,
ma'am.
366
00:17:17,906 --> 00:17:21,214
You can stop testing it.
367
00:17:21,300 --> 00:17:23,041
- One thing I'll say
about this is,
368
00:17:23,128 --> 00:17:27,002
it makes me glad
that I never do projects.
369
00:17:27,089 --> 00:17:29,613
- Accomplishment sucks.
370
00:17:29,700 --> 00:17:31,746
[chuckles]
371
00:17:31,833 --> 00:17:33,791
- Focus on the car.
372
00:17:33,878 --> 00:17:37,230
- I'm covering this car
with my need for attention.
373
00:17:37,317 --> 00:17:39,623
[chuckling]
374
00:17:39,710 --> 00:17:42,757
- Is there a way to, like,
turn down her personality?
375
00:17:42,844 --> 00:17:45,455
Like on the TV, you know?
376
00:17:45,542 --> 00:17:49,546
- Uh, maybe in, like,
advanced settings
377
00:17:49,633 --> 00:17:53,637
under, like, motion blur.
378
00:17:54,769 --> 00:17:56,945
- It's gonna take three weeks
to get my ID,
379
00:17:57,032 --> 00:17:59,295
so subscribe and stay tuned
because I'm sure
380
00:17:59,382 --> 00:18:00,992
I'll show you how stupid I look
in the final picture
381
00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:02,211
in a future video.
382
00:18:02,298 --> 00:18:03,778
- What an asshole.
383
00:18:03,865 --> 00:18:06,302
[chuckling]
384
00:18:06,389 --> 00:18:08,478
- [laughing]
385
00:18:08,565 --> 00:18:12,787
Wow, I've never heard
you say that, Butt-Head.
386
00:18:12,874 --> 00:18:15,572
- I've never needed
to say it before.
387
00:18:15,659 --> 00:18:18,314
And this time,
it needed to be said.
388
00:18:18,401 --> 00:18:22,797
[upbeat music]
389
00:18:22,884 --> 00:18:26,017
You know, when they say,
like, the internet is bad,
390
00:18:26,105 --> 00:18:28,237
like, bad for mankind,
391
00:18:28,324 --> 00:18:31,501
they mean this.
392
00:18:31,588 --> 00:18:33,721
- You might get diar-chia.
393
00:18:34,896 --> 00:18:36,811
- Ooh, yeah, yeah.
394
00:18:36,898 --> 00:18:38,639
That dog's got it
in all the right places.
395
00:18:38,726 --> 00:18:40,815
Yeah.
396
00:18:40,902 --> 00:18:42,904
- Uh, dog?
397
00:18:42,991 --> 00:18:45,080
We have found your dog chick.
398
00:18:45,167 --> 00:18:47,604
And now you must score.
399
00:18:47,691 --> 00:18:49,998
[both chuckle]
400
00:18:50,085 --> 00:18:53,306
- You know, I wish a dog
would make me score.
401
00:18:53,393 --> 00:18:55,308
- That would be cool,
but then, like,
402
00:18:55,395 --> 00:18:57,136
the dog would get
all the money.
403
00:18:57,223 --> 00:18:59,660
- So what?
I still scored.
404
00:18:59,747 --> 00:19:01,705
Everything's not always
about money, Butt-Head.
405
00:19:01,792 --> 00:19:03,620
If your job is scoring,
406
00:19:03,707 --> 00:19:06,536
you'll never work a day
in your life.
407
00:19:06,623 --> 00:19:08,103
There she is, boy.
408
00:19:08,190 --> 00:19:09,278
Now remember everything
we told you.
409
00:19:09,365 --> 00:19:11,324
- This is where
it all pays off.
410
00:19:11,411 --> 00:19:13,369
- Go!
411
00:19:14,762 --> 00:19:16,807
- Uh...
412
00:19:16,894 --> 00:19:18,853
where'd he go?
413
00:19:18,940 --> 00:19:22,117
[raccoon chittering]
414
00:19:22,204 --> 00:19:24,075
- Whoa, he's scoring.
415
00:19:24,163 --> 00:19:26,861
- Yeah, yeah, look at him go.
416
00:19:26,948 --> 00:19:29,385
[dog yelping]
417
00:19:29,472 --> 00:19:31,866
Butt-Head,
are they supposed to be biting
418
00:19:31,953 --> 00:19:33,737
and scratching so much?
419
00:19:33,824 --> 00:19:35,826
It doesn't look that fun.
420
00:19:35,913 --> 00:19:38,264
- Well, some people don't
enjoy scoring, Beavis.
421
00:19:38,351 --> 00:19:40,657
Maybe it's just not your thing.
422
00:19:40,744 --> 00:19:42,746
- No, no, no,
I mean, it looks cool.
423
00:19:42,833 --> 00:19:44,183
I just--you know.
424
00:19:44,270 --> 00:19:46,272
- No, no, it's okay, Beavis.
425
00:19:46,359 --> 00:19:48,317
Maybe you're just
not old enough.
426
00:19:48,404 --> 00:19:49,927
Don't let anyone pressure you
into something
427
00:19:50,014 --> 00:19:51,190
you're not ready for.
428
00:19:51,277 --> 00:19:52,582
- Shut up, Butt-Head!
Shut up.
429
00:19:52,669 --> 00:19:56,412
I'm really into it.
Yeah, get it.
430
00:19:56,499 --> 00:19:57,761
- Get off of him!
431
00:19:57,848 --> 00:19:59,502
[dog yelping]
432
00:19:59,589 --> 00:20:02,157
- Come on, Rufus.
You poor boy.
433
00:20:02,244 --> 00:20:03,898
I'm taking you
right to the vet!
434
00:20:03,985 --> 00:20:07,075
- Hey, you've got, like,
half our dog babies in there.
435
00:20:07,162 --> 00:20:08,816
- Yeah, our dog scored.
436
00:20:08,903 --> 00:20:11,688
And that's where dog babies
come from or something.
437
00:20:11,775 --> 00:20:13,777
Hey.
438
00:20:13,864 --> 00:20:17,346
Did I hear him say that
his dog was, like, a boy?
439
00:20:17,433 --> 00:20:22,133
- Uh, oh, yeah.
I think he did.
440
00:20:22,221 --> 00:20:25,702
- Then who's gonna
have the puppies?
441
00:20:28,052 --> 00:20:30,838
- That dumbass
took the wrong dog.
442
00:20:30,925 --> 00:20:33,406
[chuckles]
443
00:20:35,495 --> 00:20:37,888
[raccoon shrieks]
444
00:20:37,975 --> 00:20:40,413
[glass shattering]
445
00:20:40,500 --> 00:20:42,066
- It's dark.
446
00:20:42,153 --> 00:20:46,114
[heavy rock music]
447
00:20:46,201 --> 00:20:49,073
[bluesy rock music]
448
00:20:49,160 --> 00:20:56,037
♪ ♪
449
00:21:09,224 --> 00:21:10,791
[chiming noises]
450
00:21:10,878 --> 00:21:12,271
- Chirp.
29694
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