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1
00:00:05,755 --> 00:00:13,513
♪♪
2
00:00:13,804 --> 00:00:15,473
Hey, what's wrong with you?
3
00:00:15,765 --> 00:00:16,765
What?
4
00:00:17,016 --> 00:00:18,184
Your face...
5
00:00:18,476 --> 00:00:19,876
It's like you're happy
or something.
6
00:00:20,102 --> 00:00:21,229
I am happy, Frank.
7
00:00:21,521 --> 00:00:23,064
'Cause of that dude
you're donking.
8
00:00:23,356 --> 00:00:24,565
Floyd?
9
00:00:24,857 --> 00:00:26,025
Yes.
10
00:00:26,317 --> 00:00:28,444
He just gets me.
11
00:00:30,154 --> 00:00:31,423
I think you've got
a little something...
12
00:00:31,447 --> 00:00:32,532
Right here?
Other side.
13
00:00:32,823 --> 00:00:33,991
Here?
Up a little.
14
00:00:34,283 --> 00:00:35,283
In that area?
15
00:00:35,535 --> 00:00:36,661
You got it.
16
00:00:36,953 --> 00:00:39,664
Ugh, that movie was
a complete waste of time.
17
00:00:39,956 --> 00:00:41,040
I thought it was moving...
18
00:00:41,332 --> 00:00:42,750
my bowels.
19
00:00:43,042 --> 00:00:43,709
Heh heh.
20
00:00:44,001 --> 00:00:46,379
Mmm...
Oh...
21
00:00:46,671 --> 00:00:49,840
Reverse, reverse,
skip, skip, draw four!
22
00:00:50,132 --> 00:00:51,884
Ha ha! Oh, hell no!
23
00:00:52,176 --> 00:00:53,928
That's awesome, Liz.
24
00:00:54,220 --> 00:00:55,740
I'm really happy
that you found someone
25
00:00:56,013 --> 00:00:56,597
to care about.
26
00:00:56,889 --> 00:00:59,517
Because relationships are hard.
27
00:00:59,809 --> 00:01:00,889
So if you ever need someone
28
00:01:00,935 --> 00:01:02,538
to come over and videotape
you guys doing it,
29
00:01:02,562 --> 00:01:03,562
or whatever,
30
00:01:03,813 --> 00:01:05,189
I can make room in my schedule.
31
00:01:05,481 --> 00:01:08,276
Thanks, Frank.
You're welcome.
32
00:01:08,568 --> 00:01:10,027
No judgments.
33
00:01:10,319 --> 00:01:12,154
Don.
34
00:01:12,446 --> 00:01:14,323
Jack, you old dog, how are you?
35
00:01:14,615 --> 00:01:16,492
I'm good, sir.
Of course you are.
36
00:01:16,784 --> 00:01:18,911
Look at those eyes,
sharp, like a panther's.
37
00:01:19,203 --> 00:01:20,681
Thank you, sir...
Would you like to sit down?
38
00:01:20,705 --> 00:01:21,747
I can't.
39
00:01:22,039 --> 00:01:23,799
I took my grandkids snorkeling
at St. Bart's,
40
00:01:23,916 --> 00:01:25,209
and got stung by a jellyfish.
41
00:01:25,501 --> 00:01:26,711
I got a welt on my ass
42
00:01:27,003 --> 00:01:28,713
the size
of a Red Delicious apple.
43
00:01:29,005 --> 00:01:30,285
I'm very sorry
to hear that, sir.
44
00:01:30,423 --> 00:01:31,132
Yeah.
45
00:01:31,424 --> 00:01:32,883
Boy, Jack...
46
00:01:33,175 --> 00:01:34,510
you really terrified the people
47
00:01:34,802 --> 00:01:36,971
with that fireworks
special of yours.
48
00:01:40,850 --> 00:01:42,602
Well, we were trying
for something dramatic,
49
00:01:42,893 --> 00:01:44,937
and I don't regret trying.
50
00:01:45,229 --> 00:01:46,229
Well, you gotta try.
51
00:01:46,397 --> 00:01:47,437
As my old man always said,
52
00:01:47,523 --> 00:01:49,567
If you try, you win.
53
00:01:49,859 --> 00:01:53,529
And he was a hell
of a garbage man.
54
00:01:53,821 --> 00:01:56,324
I just want you to know
we all still have
55
00:01:56,616 --> 00:01:58,159
a lot of faith in you, Jack.
56
00:01:58,451 --> 00:01:59,118
Well, thank you, sir.
57
00:01:59,410 --> 00:02:00,512
That means the world
coming from you.
58
00:02:00,536 --> 00:02:02,455
But I'm taking
the microwave division
59
00:02:02,747 --> 00:02:03,748
away from you.
60
00:02:04,040 --> 00:02:07,168
I mean,
you're in the rough, Jack.
61
00:02:07,460 --> 00:02:09,462
You gotta get back
on the fairway.
62
00:02:09,754 --> 00:02:11,213
Yes, sir.
63
00:02:11,505 --> 00:02:13,549
You ever think about
getting remarried?
64
00:02:13,841 --> 00:02:16,093
Well, I just got divorced, sir.
65
00:02:16,385 --> 00:02:19,388
Everyone in this division
is married except you.
66
00:02:19,680 --> 00:02:21,015
Look at Bob.
67
00:02:21,307 --> 00:02:23,517
His wife looks
just like Walter Matthau,
68
00:02:23,809 --> 00:02:26,228
but she's always there for him.
69
00:02:26,520 --> 00:02:28,000
That's the kind of companion
you need.
70
00:02:28,230 --> 00:02:31,609
Think about that.
71
00:02:31,901 --> 00:02:33,110
I will, sir.
72
00:02:34,528 --> 00:02:35,821
I'm going to see Tracy Jordan.
73
00:02:36,113 --> 00:02:36,822
He is funny.
74
00:02:37,114 --> 00:02:39,033
What's that film where
he turned into a dog?
75
00:02:39,325 --> 00:02:41,327
Uh, Fat Bitch, sir.
76
00:02:41,619 --> 00:02:42,619
That's it... I love it.
77
00:02:42,703 --> 00:02:44,664
Boy, that's a great film.
78
00:02:54,256 --> 00:02:56,258
I'm sorry I let you down.
79
00:03:02,223 --> 00:03:10,106
♪♪
80
00:03:21,117 --> 00:03:23,077
Thank you for agreeing
to meet with me, Don Geiss.
81
00:03:23,202 --> 00:03:25,122
Would you like some Grenadine
or some fried rice?
82
00:03:25,287 --> 00:03:26,622
I'm good, thanks.
83
00:03:26,914 --> 00:03:29,959
Sir, I have a movie project
84
00:03:30,251 --> 00:03:32,753
that is going to blow your mind.
85
00:03:33,045 --> 00:03:34,880
I call it Jefferson.
86
00:03:35,172 --> 00:03:37,550
A movie version
of The Jeffersons?
87
00:03:37,842 --> 00:03:38,842
I love it.
88
00:03:39,009 --> 00:03:40,094
No, Thomas Jefferson.
89
00:03:40,386 --> 00:03:42,596
I just recently found out
that he went to town
90
00:03:42,888 --> 00:03:43,973
on one of my ancestors,
91
00:03:44,265 --> 00:03:45,307
so we're related.
92
00:03:45,599 --> 00:03:47,143
You want to play
Thomas Jefferson?
93
00:03:47,435 --> 00:03:49,562
And Sally Hemings,
and King George.
94
00:03:49,854 --> 00:03:51,230
I'm going to play all the parts.
95
00:03:51,522 --> 00:03:52,602
Did you know he had a lisp?
96
00:03:52,773 --> 00:03:55,192
Whath's up, sthupid jerks?
97
00:03:55,484 --> 00:03:56,986
I'm Thomas Jefferthon.
98
00:03:58,070 --> 00:04:00,281
So we're gonna need
about 35 million
99
00:04:00,573 --> 00:04:01,782
to do this thing right.
100
00:04:03,784 --> 00:04:05,095
I'm gonna get us
one of those big clocks.
101
00:04:05,119 --> 00:04:05,828
We could hang it in there.
102
00:04:06,120 --> 00:04:06,787
Sorry I'm late.
103
00:04:07,079 --> 00:04:08,372
Aw, Lutz, that's okay.
104
00:04:08,664 --> 00:04:10,541
I'm just glad you're here.
105
00:04:10,833 --> 00:04:13,252
Oh, you've got a face
like a baby's bottom!
106
00:04:13,544 --> 00:04:14,712
Boop.
107
00:04:16,881 --> 00:04:18,066
I hate when you're
in a good mood.
108
00:04:18,090 --> 00:04:18,758
It makes me feel unsafe.
109
00:04:19,049 --> 00:04:20,843
Like when my mom
used to make daiquiris
110
00:04:21,135 --> 00:04:22,344
and sing Tanya Tucker songs.
111
00:04:22,636 --> 00:04:23,804
That sounds awesome.
112
00:04:24,096 --> 00:04:25,866
Miss Lemon, Mr. Donaghy
would like to see you.
113
00:04:25,890 --> 00:04:28,017
He's across the street
at Christie's auction house.
114
00:04:28,309 --> 00:04:29,309
Oh, brother.
115
00:04:29,435 --> 00:04:30,561
What's this?
116
00:04:30,853 --> 00:04:32,253
Jack goes to Sbarro
when he's angry,
117
00:04:32,480 --> 00:04:34,166
the New York Stock Exchange
when he's horny,
118
00:04:34,190 --> 00:04:37,067
and Christie's auction house
when he's depressed.
119
00:04:37,359 --> 00:04:38,694
He said he needs you
immediately.
120
00:04:38,986 --> 00:04:40,863
Yeah...
121
00:04:41,155 --> 00:04:43,574
that's the Liz face
I'm comfortable with.
122
00:04:51,207 --> 00:04:52,833
You've been avoiding me, Lemon.
123
00:04:53,125 --> 00:04:54,794
How do you do that
without turning around?
124
00:04:55,085 --> 00:04:57,671
To be perfectly honest,
125
00:04:57,963 --> 00:04:59,191
the first couple of people
I did that to
126
00:04:59,215 --> 00:05:00,257
were not you.
127
00:05:00,549 --> 00:05:02,384
But... here we are.
128
00:05:02,676 --> 00:05:03,676
Mr. Donaghy.
129
00:05:03,719 --> 00:05:04,988
Hi, you probably
don't remember me.
130
00:05:05,012 --> 00:05:06,012
I'm Phoebe.
131
00:05:06,222 --> 00:05:07,973
I handled the sale
of your ex-wife's jewelry
132
00:05:08,265 --> 00:05:09,265
to an anonymous Arab.
133
00:05:09,350 --> 00:05:11,018
Oh, yes, of course.
134
00:05:11,310 --> 00:05:12,510
Those were such lovely pieces.
135
00:05:12,770 --> 00:05:14,063
The ruby
and diamond cluster ring
136
00:05:14,355 --> 00:05:15,773
was particularly exquisite.
137
00:05:16,065 --> 00:05:17,441
That was her engagement ring.
138
00:05:17,733 --> 00:05:20,152
You know, I took the money
from the sale of those pieces,
139
00:05:20,444 --> 00:05:21,444
and I bought a sailboat,
140
00:05:21,695 --> 00:05:23,405
and I named it after my ex-wife,
141
00:05:23,697 --> 00:05:24,697
and I sank it.
142
00:05:24,782 --> 00:05:26,242
It's true.
143
00:05:26,534 --> 00:05:27,694
The Bianca Blows is somewhere
144
00:05:27,743 --> 00:05:30,329
at the bottom
of the Peconic Bay.
145
00:05:30,621 --> 00:05:32,081
If there's anything
I can show you,
146
00:05:32,373 --> 00:05:33,666
please do let me know.
147
00:05:33,958 --> 00:05:34,500
Okay?
148
00:05:34,792 --> 00:05:36,502
Yeah.
149
00:05:38,254 --> 00:05:40,756
I really do like these
equestrian paintings.
150
00:05:42,967 --> 00:05:43,967
Isn't that magnificent?
151
00:05:44,009 --> 00:05:46,887
Sometimes I wish I were a horse.
152
00:05:47,179 --> 00:05:49,348
Strong, free.
153
00:05:49,640 --> 00:05:52,434
My chestnut haunches glistening
in the sun.
154
00:05:52,726 --> 00:05:53,726
Are you okay?
155
00:05:53,936 --> 00:05:55,437
Hmm?
Oh, yeah, sure.
156
00:05:55,729 --> 00:05:57,231
You know, I'm really sorry
157
00:05:57,523 --> 00:05:58,523
that I let you down.
158
00:05:58,566 --> 00:05:59,567
You should be.
159
00:05:59,859 --> 00:06:01,694
My special was a disaster.
160
00:06:01,986 --> 00:06:03,279
I wouldn't say that.
161
00:06:06,448 --> 00:06:07,950
You left me dangling, Lemon.
162
00:06:08,242 --> 00:06:09,785
I'm not a creative type
like you,
163
00:06:10,077 --> 00:06:13,122
with your work sneakers
and your left-handedness.
164
00:06:13,414 --> 00:06:14,748
I can't do what you do.
165
00:06:15,040 --> 00:06:16,292
I know, I dropped the ball.
166
00:06:16,584 --> 00:06:18,064
I was just trying to do
what you said,
167
00:06:18,252 --> 00:06:19,378
and have a personal life.
168
00:06:19,670 --> 00:06:21,470
And I guess I got caught up
with this new guy.
169
00:06:21,672 --> 00:06:22,672
Oh, right, flower guy.
170
00:06:22,923 --> 00:06:23,923
His name is Floyd.
171
00:06:24,133 --> 00:06:25,301
That's unfortunate.
172
00:06:25,593 --> 00:06:27,073
I'd really like you
to meet him, Jack.
173
00:06:27,344 --> 00:06:28,345
Fine.
174
00:06:28,637 --> 00:06:30,198
I'd like to meet the man
that made Liz Lemon
175
00:06:30,222 --> 00:06:32,182
shirk her responsibilities.
176
00:06:32,474 --> 00:06:33,976
Let's say Persil, 9:00.
177
00:06:34,268 --> 00:06:35,268
Be sure to wear a tie.
178
00:06:35,436 --> 00:06:37,146
Are you sure you're okay?
179
00:06:42,109 --> 00:06:44,737
I pitched my Jefferson movie
to Don Geiss.
180
00:06:45,029 --> 00:06:46,029
He said no.
181
00:06:46,113 --> 00:06:48,273
He said people only see movies
because of the previews,
182
00:06:48,532 --> 00:06:51,452
and he couldn't visualize
my Jefferson preview.
183
00:06:51,744 --> 00:06:53,579
He wants me to do
Fat Bitch 2 instead.
184
00:06:53,871 --> 00:06:55,873
Well, that doesn't even
make sense.
185
00:06:56,165 --> 00:06:58,208
Everyone knows Fat Bitch died
at the end.
186
00:06:58,500 --> 00:07:01,295
It's not the kind of stuff
I want to do anymore, Ken.
187
00:07:01,587 --> 00:07:02,963
I want to be taken seriously.
188
00:07:03,255 --> 00:07:03,756
What should I do?
189
00:07:04,048 --> 00:07:06,300
Well, remember
when Fat Bitch called
190
00:07:06,592 --> 00:07:08,260
all her dog friends together,
191
00:07:08,552 --> 00:07:09,905
and they used their
high-pitched howling
192
00:07:09,929 --> 00:07:10,947
to mess up the...
You're right, K.
193
00:07:10,971 --> 00:07:13,307
I should make my own
Jefferson preview,
194
00:07:13,599 --> 00:07:15,434
and show it to Don Geiss.
195
00:07:17,061 --> 00:07:18,812
I'm never gonna finish
this bikini
196
00:07:19,104 --> 00:07:22,274
before Nana's birthday.
197
00:07:22,566 --> 00:07:24,151
Hey, Liz Lemon, where you going?
198
00:07:24,443 --> 00:07:25,443
Uh, home.
199
00:07:25,611 --> 00:07:27,047
I gotta go get ready
for a dinner with Jack.
200
00:07:27,071 --> 00:07:28,864
Listen, I'm gonna need
to make a fake trailer
201
00:07:29,156 --> 00:07:30,156
for my Jefferson film.
202
00:07:30,199 --> 00:07:32,368
I'm gonna need the
entire resources of the show
203
00:07:32,660 --> 00:07:33,820
for no more than three weeks.
204
00:07:33,911 --> 00:07:34,453
You in?
205
00:07:34,745 --> 00:07:35,913
No-what?
206
00:07:36,205 --> 00:07:37,223
Tracy, you're not doing that.
207
00:07:37,247 --> 00:07:38,582
We have a show on Friday.
208
00:07:38,874 --> 00:07:40,474
Liz Lemon, you are
my Alexander Hamilton.
209
00:07:40,709 --> 00:07:43,003
I don't know what that means.
210
00:07:43,295 --> 00:07:44,880
Writers, listen.
211
00:07:45,172 --> 00:07:46,632
I need your help.
212
00:07:48,801 --> 00:07:50,481
Well, I hope this isn't
too boring for you.
213
00:07:50,594 --> 00:07:51,594
Are you kidding?
214
00:07:51,845 --> 00:07:52,845
Jack Donaghy's a legend.
215
00:07:53,055 --> 00:07:54,240
I've read his book,
like, 20 times.
216
00:07:54,264 --> 00:07:55,557
Jack wrote a book?
Yeah.
217
00:07:55,849 --> 00:07:57,077
Jack Altack:
The Art of Aggression
218
00:07:57,101 --> 00:07:58,143
in Business.
219
00:07:58,435 --> 00:07:59,061
Oh, no.
220
00:07:59,353 --> 00:08:01,230
He got here before us.
221
00:08:01,522 --> 00:08:03,273
You're not supposed
to let that happen.
222
00:08:03,565 --> 00:08:05,985
That's chapter two in the book.
223
00:08:06,276 --> 00:08:08,362
Hi, Jack.
224
00:08:08,654 --> 00:08:09,947
This is Floyd.
225
00:08:10,239 --> 00:08:11,991
It's a pleasure
to meet you, sir.
226
00:08:12,282 --> 00:08:13,659
Well, you're Floyd.
227
00:08:13,951 --> 00:08:15,577
The only other Floyd I ever knew
228
00:08:15,869 --> 00:08:17,997
was this Korean barber
who used to cut my hair
229
00:08:18,288 --> 00:08:19,808
down in the 50th Street
subway station.
230
00:08:19,915 --> 00:08:20,958
That's my dad.
231
00:08:21,250 --> 00:08:23,043
I'm Floyd, Jr.
232
00:08:23,335 --> 00:08:25,087
I-I'm just kidding.
233
00:08:25,379 --> 00:08:27,047
Well, please.
234
00:08:27,339 --> 00:08:28,841
Sorry.
235
00:08:29,133 --> 00:08:30,402
I'm just nervous
to meet the head
236
00:08:30,426 --> 00:08:31,552
of east coast television
237
00:08:31,844 --> 00:08:33,084
and microwave oven programming.
238
00:08:33,220 --> 00:08:34,722
I just got the word from Geiss
239
00:08:35,014 --> 00:08:36,515
they're taking me off microwave.
240
00:08:36,807 --> 00:08:38,392
Oh, no.
Really?
241
00:08:38,684 --> 00:08:40,728
Mr. Donaghy,
242
00:08:41,020 --> 00:08:42,896
with all due respect
to Mr. Geiss,
243
00:08:43,188 --> 00:08:44,833
I gotta say he's making
a terrible mistake.
244
00:08:44,857 --> 00:08:46,977
This company's stability
in the small-appliance market
245
00:08:47,151 --> 00:08:49,069
is in large part your doing.
246
00:08:49,361 --> 00:08:51,947
The dedicated popcorn setting
on your microwave
247
00:08:52,239 --> 00:08:54,491
was the imagination
breakthrough of 1995.
248
00:08:54,783 --> 00:08:58,370
In 2002, you increased
corporate earnings by 3%,
249
00:08:58,662 --> 00:09:00,789
while the country suffered
through a recession.
250
00:09:01,081 --> 00:09:02,249
And Attack of the Clones,
251
00:09:02,541 --> 00:09:03,701
which was seriously the worst
252
00:09:03,834 --> 00:09:04,834
of the Star Wars...
253
00:09:05,085 --> 00:09:06,086
One sec, Liz, one sec.
254
00:09:06,378 --> 00:09:07,838
And on a personal note, sir,
255
00:09:08,130 --> 00:09:09,130
in my mind,
256
00:09:09,298 --> 00:09:10,924
the Foo Fighters' song
Best of You
257
00:09:11,216 --> 00:09:12,496
is about your managerial skills.
258
00:09:15,763 --> 00:09:17,163
Lemon, I want
to kiss your boyfriend
259
00:09:17,347 --> 00:09:18,347
on the mouth.
260
00:09:18,474 --> 00:09:20,976
Chapter 12.
261
00:09:21,268 --> 00:09:22,895
I thought you were gonna do it.
262
00:09:23,187 --> 00:09:24,187
What are you drinking?
263
00:09:24,229 --> 00:09:25,397
Club soda.
Oh, that's a shame.
264
00:09:25,689 --> 00:09:26,689
Pete!
265
00:09:30,694 --> 00:09:31,694
Hey, Liz Lemon.
266
00:09:31,945 --> 00:09:32,964
Could you go away for a while?
267
00:09:32,988 --> 00:09:34,698
I gotta get rid
of Freddie's erection.
268
00:09:34,990 --> 00:09:37,117
Explain what is happening here.
269
00:09:37,409 --> 00:09:38,660
Freddie is playing the part
270
00:09:38,952 --> 00:09:40,954
of Thomas Jefferson's horse
Caractacus.
271
00:09:41,246 --> 00:09:42,406
We needed a place to keep him
272
00:09:42,581 --> 00:09:43,165
till we shoot his stunts.
273
00:09:43,457 --> 00:09:46,126
No, Tracy, I told you
not to do this.
274
00:09:46,418 --> 00:09:47,836
Jack said I could.
275
00:09:48,128 --> 00:09:49,379
This movie is my destiny.
276
00:09:49,671 --> 00:09:51,431
It's the reason why God
put me on this earth.
277
00:09:52,800 --> 00:09:54,593
I'll take you off this earth.
278
00:09:54,885 --> 00:09:56,804
The overwhelming
violence of the subject matter
279
00:09:57,096 --> 00:09:58,156
is in deliberate juxtaposition
280
00:09:58,180 --> 00:10:00,682
with the pastoral beauty
of the terrain.
281
00:10:00,974 --> 00:10:03,602
Jack, Tracy put a horse
in my office.
282
00:10:03,894 --> 00:10:06,438
Lemon, you've met... Hello.
283
00:10:06,730 --> 00:10:08,732
You probably don't
remember me... I'm Phoebe.
284
00:10:09,024 --> 00:10:09,566
We met the other day.
285
00:10:09,858 --> 00:10:10,938
Yeah, yeah, I remember you.
286
00:10:10,984 --> 00:10:11,984
I'm Liz.
Oh, sorry.
287
00:10:12,236 --> 00:10:13,236
I don't shake hands.
288
00:10:13,445 --> 00:10:15,030
I have Avian Bone Syndrome.
289
00:10:15,322 --> 00:10:16,322
Oh, boy, okay.
290
00:10:16,490 --> 00:10:17,783
Hollow bones.
291
00:10:18,075 --> 00:10:19,409
Lemon, I want your opinion.
292
00:10:19,701 --> 00:10:20,941
Which of these two do you like?
293
00:10:21,203 --> 00:10:23,997
They're both beautiful.
294
00:10:24,289 --> 00:10:26,667
They look just like the one
crapping in my office.
295
00:10:26,959 --> 00:10:28,436
Did you tell Tracy
he could use the crew
296
00:10:28,460 --> 00:10:30,212
to make a trailer
for his crazy movie?
297
00:10:30,504 --> 00:10:31,797
Yes.
How's Floyd?
298
00:10:32,089 --> 00:10:33,089
What? he's fine.
299
00:10:33,257 --> 00:10:34,497
You know, I called him earlier.
300
00:10:34,716 --> 00:10:36,194
We had a very nice chat...
Did he mention that?
301
00:10:36,218 --> 00:10:37,678
No, he didn't.
Oh, he will.
302
00:10:37,970 --> 00:10:39,346
He's a good man, the Floydster.
303
00:10:39,638 --> 00:10:40,848
Oh, "the Floydster."
304
00:10:41,140 --> 00:10:42,766
Don't give him a nickname
before I do.
305
00:10:43,058 --> 00:10:45,352
Um... the white horse.
306
00:10:45,644 --> 00:10:46,687
I was wondering if...
307
00:10:46,979 --> 00:10:47,979
Did I hurt you?
308
00:10:48,063 --> 00:10:49,648
Just a little bit,
but that's okay.
309
00:10:49,940 --> 00:10:52,067
Yes, the white horse, it's...
310
00:10:54,820 --> 00:10:55,445
Yo, Trey, we got a problem.
311
00:10:55,737 --> 00:10:57,573
Pray, who be this Tracy Jordan
312
00:10:57,865 --> 00:10:58,991
thou speakest of?
313
00:10:59,283 --> 00:11:02,202
Uh, President Jefferson,
we got a problem.
314
00:11:02,494 --> 00:11:03,537
Speakest.
315
00:11:03,829 --> 00:11:04,997
That horse ate your wig.
316
00:11:05,289 --> 00:11:06,790
Well, stand guard by his rump,
317
00:11:07,082 --> 00:11:08,667
and await it in his droppings.
318
00:11:08,959 --> 00:11:11,587
Or we could probably
just go get a new wig.
319
00:11:11,879 --> 00:11:13,755
I like you, young man.
320
00:11:14,047 --> 00:11:15,299
You shall run my university.
321
00:11:17,134 --> 00:11:17,843
Yeah, yeah.
322
00:11:18,135 --> 00:11:19,135
No, it's very nice.
323
00:11:19,386 --> 00:11:21,013
Hey, what are you
doing here, Jack?
324
00:11:21,305 --> 00:11:22,472
Jack bought me this painting.
325
00:11:22,764 --> 00:11:25,350
Wow. Um...
326
00:11:25,642 --> 00:11:28,312
Is that lion eating the horse?
327
00:11:28,604 --> 00:11:30,772
Or perhaps it's eating
universal health care.
328
00:11:32,232 --> 00:11:33,334
I bought this for the Floydster
329
00:11:33,358 --> 00:11:35,110
to congratulate him
on his promotion.
330
00:11:35,402 --> 00:11:37,196
Well, it's not a sure thing.
331
00:11:37,487 --> 00:11:39,127
I didn't know you were up
for a promotion.
332
00:11:39,198 --> 00:11:39,907
Well...
333
00:11:40,199 --> 00:11:41,199
We should go celebrate.
334
00:11:41,408 --> 00:11:42,409
I'm free for lunch.
335
00:11:42,701 --> 00:11:44,061
Do you want to grab
a burger, or...
336
00:11:44,203 --> 00:11:45,963
Shoot, I just said
I'd go to lunch with Jack.
337
00:11:45,996 --> 00:11:48,624
Why don't you join us?
Oh.
338
00:11:50,167 --> 00:11:51,168
Would that be okay?
339
00:11:51,460 --> 00:11:52,628
Yeah, I guess so.
340
00:11:52,920 --> 00:11:53,920
Sure.
341
00:11:55,214 --> 00:11:57,049
It's kind of like
you two are dating.
342
00:11:59,051 --> 00:12:01,011
Um, I think that Coulter
was right about Edwards.
343
00:12:05,641 --> 00:12:07,309
So where's Pete?
344
00:12:07,601 --> 00:12:09,937
He took his kids
to that Russian cat circus.
345
00:12:10,229 --> 00:12:11,229
Wow.
346
00:12:11,271 --> 00:12:12,439
You are bringin' it.
347
00:12:13,982 --> 00:12:15,400
Yeah, you like that?
348
00:12:15,692 --> 00:12:16,692
Mmm.
349
00:12:16,902 --> 00:12:18,695
It's got pockets...
Are you into that?
350
00:12:18,987 --> 00:12:19,987
Ooh, what's this?
351
00:12:20,030 --> 00:12:21,030
A used Kleenex.
352
00:12:21,281 --> 00:12:23,200
I feel like I'm in a rap video.
353
00:12:23,492 --> 00:12:24,952
Wait, let me turn on
my humidifier.
354
00:12:25,244 --> 00:12:26,453
Yeah.
355
00:12:26,745 --> 00:12:27,412
Uh-oh.
356
00:12:27,704 --> 00:12:30,040
It's so dry in here.
357
00:12:30,332 --> 00:12:32,412
I really don't know how much
more of this I can take.
358
00:12:33,126 --> 00:12:34,127
Unh, unh...
359
00:12:34,419 --> 00:12:35,879
Unh, unh.
Yeah.
360
00:12:36,171 --> 00:12:37,172
Old school, Kid 'n Play.
361
00:12:37,464 --> 00:12:38,131
Here we go.
362
00:12:38,423 --> 00:12:39,503
That's not that impressive.
363
00:12:39,633 --> 00:12:40,801
That's Davy Jones.
364
00:12:42,302 --> 00:12:42,761
Hey, it's Jack.
365
00:12:43,053 --> 00:12:44,471
Jack... what does he want?
366
00:12:44,763 --> 00:12:46,723
He's just saying hi.
367
00:12:47,015 --> 00:12:48,493
Oh, he wants to meet
at that diner on 71st.
368
00:12:48,517 --> 00:12:49,535
Get a veggie burger
and a milkshake.
369
00:12:49,559 --> 00:12:50,227
You wanna go?
370
00:12:50,519 --> 00:12:51,645
It's midnight.
371
00:12:51,937 --> 00:12:52,977
Yeah, we don't have to go.
372
00:12:53,230 --> 00:12:55,148
There, done.
373
00:12:55,440 --> 00:12:56,441
Good,
374
00:12:56,733 --> 00:12:58,093
'cause this VapoRub
isn't gonna get
375
00:12:58,151 --> 00:13:00,487
under my nose by itself.
376
00:13:02,698 --> 00:13:03,698
He says goodnight.
377
00:13:05,117 --> 00:13:06,535
And "sleep tight."
378
00:13:06,827 --> 00:13:08,412
"And don't let the bed..."
379
00:13:08,704 --> 00:13:09,864
All right, enough.
Gimme that.
380
00:13:10,038 --> 00:13:12,958
"Jack, I have taken
a sleeping pill
381
00:13:13,250 --> 00:13:16,586
"because I have a big
lawyer meeting..."
382
00:13:16,878 --> 00:13:17,546
That's what we call 'em.
383
00:13:17,838 --> 00:13:18,964
"In the morning.
384
00:13:19,256 --> 00:13:20,256
Floyd."
385
00:13:23,844 --> 00:13:25,595
"Lemon, is that you?"
386
00:13:25,887 --> 00:13:27,389
I always sign it Floydster.
387
00:13:31,727 --> 00:13:33,312
It's Jack!
388
00:13:33,603 --> 00:13:34,603
Don't answer it.
389
00:13:43,447 --> 00:13:44,865
Oh, my God!
390
00:13:50,287 --> 00:13:51,288
Can he see us?
391
00:13:51,580 --> 00:13:54,041
The call is coming
from inside the house!
392
00:13:54,333 --> 00:13:56,418
Turn of the lights and get down.
393
00:14:05,260 --> 00:14:07,304
Jonathan, I want
to talk to Jack right now.
394
00:14:07,596 --> 00:14:09,389
He's at Christie's.
395
00:14:09,681 --> 00:14:11,058
But he left these for you.
396
00:14:11,350 --> 00:14:12,350
What's this?
397
00:14:12,601 --> 00:14:13,602
Tickets for you and Floyd
398
00:14:13,894 --> 00:14:14,934
for tonight's Knicks game.
399
00:14:15,145 --> 00:14:15,854
For me and Floyd?
400
00:14:16,146 --> 00:14:18,148
He tried to drop them off
at your house last night,
401
00:14:18,440 --> 00:14:20,942
but someone pretended
not to be home.
402
00:14:21,234 --> 00:14:23,653
Oh.
403
00:14:23,945 --> 00:14:25,238
This is really nice.
404
00:14:25,530 --> 00:14:29,034
Yes, he seems very taken
with Floyd.
405
00:14:29,326 --> 00:14:31,411
And you, of course.
406
00:14:37,334 --> 00:14:39,211
Are these good seats?
Yeah.
407
00:14:39,503 --> 00:14:40,712
It's actually a private box.
408
00:14:45,801 --> 00:14:47,969
Hey, guys.
409
00:14:50,597 --> 00:14:52,797
Mr. Geiss, I know we disagreed
on my next movie project,
410
00:14:52,849 --> 00:14:54,810
but I hope this will
change your mind.
411
00:14:55,102 --> 00:14:57,229
I give you this.
412
00:14:59,356 --> 00:15:02,359
413
00:15:02,651 --> 00:15:04,403
Ah...
414
00:15:04,694 --> 00:15:05,694
hoe that dirt.
415
00:15:05,821 --> 00:15:07,781
Put your back into it.
416
00:15:08,073 --> 00:15:10,117
Mr. Jefferson,
the British have invaded.
417
00:15:10,409 --> 00:15:12,160
Ah, bring me my horse!
418
00:15:12,452 --> 00:15:15,497
Bring me Caractacus!
419
00:15:15,789 --> 00:15:16,415
You come along.
420
00:15:16,706 --> 00:15:18,667
In a world without hope...
421
00:15:18,959 --> 00:15:20,585
Who are these Americans
422
00:15:20,877 --> 00:15:22,421
with their ridiculous ideas
423
00:15:22,712 --> 00:15:24,256
of freedom and equalities?
424
00:15:24,548 --> 00:15:27,175
One man would
declare his independence
425
00:15:27,467 --> 00:15:30,512
for us all.
426
00:15:36,518 --> 00:15:37,602
Aah!
427
00:15:39,396 --> 00:15:41,982
Eat that, King George!
428
00:15:45,193 --> 00:15:47,237
I shall call it Susan!
429
00:15:49,448 --> 00:15:50,532
I'm with child.
430
00:15:50,824 --> 00:15:51,824
What?
431
00:15:51,908 --> 00:15:53,493
Free me and make me your wife.
432
00:15:53,785 --> 00:15:55,579
Um, I'll have to
get back to you on that.
433
00:15:55,871 --> 00:15:58,707
Source Award
nominee Tracy Jordan...
434
00:15:58,999 --> 00:16:00,167
Kill them!
435
00:16:00,459 --> 00:16:02,252
Kill them all!
436
00:16:02,544 --> 00:16:06,214
NAACP Image
Award presenter Tracy Jordan...
437
00:16:06,506 --> 00:16:10,177
and Academy Award watcher
Tracy Jordan is...
438
00:16:10,469 --> 00:16:12,471
This is for you, Don Geiss!
439
00:16:12,762 --> 00:16:13,762
Ha ha!
440
00:16:13,805 --> 00:16:15,307
Jefferson!
441
00:16:15,599 --> 00:16:17,392
Christmas, 2008.
442
00:16:17,684 --> 00:16:18,684
Get me off this horse.
443
00:16:20,604 --> 00:16:23,023
Well, Mr. Geiss,
what do you think?
444
00:16:23,315 --> 00:16:25,358
Well, Tracy...
445
00:16:25,650 --> 00:16:26,650
that was terrible.
446
00:16:26,860 --> 00:16:28,778
The answer is no.
447
00:16:29,070 --> 00:16:33,116
Let's talk about Fat Bitch 2.
448
00:16:35,660 --> 00:16:37,300
So I'm bored,
and I sit next to Don Geiss,
449
00:16:37,496 --> 00:16:38,598
and I want to make
a good impression,
450
00:16:38,622 --> 00:16:39,164
so I bought four bottles
451
00:16:39,456 --> 00:16:41,625
of absolutely
fantastic champagne.
452
00:16:41,917 --> 00:16:43,144
Lemon, you're gonna love
this story.
453
00:16:43,168 --> 00:16:44,328
You told me this story, Jack.
454
00:16:44,377 --> 00:16:45,417
We're on our way to Tokyo,
455
00:16:45,629 --> 00:16:46,629
we're out over the ocean,
456
00:16:46,671 --> 00:16:47,831
and the cabin pressure drops.
457
00:16:47,964 --> 00:16:49,233
The masks are coming out
of the ceiling,
458
00:16:49,257 --> 00:16:51,384
and the corks are popping out
of the champagne.
459
00:16:51,676 --> 00:16:53,154
And I don't give a damn
about the masks,
460
00:16:53,178 --> 00:16:54,818
I'm on all fours
trying to shove the corks
461
00:16:54,930 --> 00:16:55,930
back in the bottle.
462
00:16:56,139 --> 00:16:57,224
And Don Geiss says,
463
00:16:57,516 --> 00:16:58,683
"Now, there's an executive
464
00:16:58,975 --> 00:17:01,269
who knows how
to keep his costs down!"
465
00:17:03,230 --> 00:17:04,731
That's great.
466
00:17:07,275 --> 00:17:07,859
I'm gonna get
some more crab cakes.
467
00:17:08,151 --> 00:17:09,694
Liz, you want anything?
No, thanks.
468
00:17:14,282 --> 00:17:14,950
What are you doing?!
469
00:17:15,242 --> 00:17:18,328
I'm watching the ballgame
with you and the Floydster.
470
00:17:18,620 --> 00:17:21,248
But don't you kind of feel
like a third wheel, Jack?
471
00:17:21,540 --> 00:17:23,333
No, Lemon...
You're the third wheel.
472
00:17:23,625 --> 00:17:24,751
Excuse me?
473
00:17:25,043 --> 00:17:26,336
Well, it's really quite simple.
474
00:17:26,628 --> 00:17:29,172
Men seek out the company
of other men they admire
475
00:17:29,464 --> 00:17:30,464
and want to be like.
476
00:17:30,590 --> 00:17:31,675
Floyd is me 20 years ago.
477
00:17:31,967 --> 00:17:33,301
I'm Don Geiss 30 years ago.
478
00:17:33,593 --> 00:17:34,993
20 years from now,
Floyd will be me,
479
00:17:35,262 --> 00:17:35,929
I'm gonna be Don Geiss,
480
00:17:36,221 --> 00:17:36,930
and Don Geiss will be dead.
481
00:17:37,222 --> 00:17:38,765
Who thinks like that?
482
00:17:39,057 --> 00:17:40,057
Men do.
483
00:17:40,183 --> 00:17:41,503
That's why you're
the third wheel.
484
00:17:41,726 --> 00:17:43,645
Just back off, okay?
485
00:17:43,937 --> 00:17:45,647
Lemon, are you telling me
to stay away
486
00:17:45,939 --> 00:17:46,939
from your boyfriend?
487
00:17:47,190 --> 00:17:48,501
Not that I blame you,
because I could
488
00:17:48,525 --> 00:17:49,919
take him away from you
if I wanted to.
489
00:17:49,943 --> 00:17:51,027
This is my life, Jack.
490
00:17:51,319 --> 00:17:52,904
I know you're
in a bad spot right now.
491
00:17:53,196 --> 00:17:55,316
But you can't use Floyd
to feel better about yourself.
492
00:17:55,532 --> 00:17:56,532
It's not fair.
493
00:17:56,616 --> 00:17:57,951
All right, how about
494
00:17:58,243 --> 00:17:59,720
some kind of a time-share
arrangement?
495
00:17:59,744 --> 00:18:01,013
You can have him Monday,
Wednesday, and Friday...
496
00:18:01,037 --> 00:18:02,581
I don't want Friday...
We have a show.
497
00:18:02,872 --> 00:18:04,792
Why am I even having
this conversation with you?!
498
00:18:04,958 --> 00:18:06,293
Look at your life, Jack.
499
00:18:06,585 --> 00:18:08,378
It's like this skybox.
500
00:18:08,670 --> 00:18:10,088
It's fancy and it's empty,
501
00:18:10,380 --> 00:18:13,008
and it smells like crab cakes.
502
00:18:13,300 --> 00:18:14,301
Get your own Floyd,
503
00:18:14,593 --> 00:18:17,512
because this one is taken.
504
00:18:19,764 --> 00:18:22,183
Oh, outstanding.
505
00:18:22,475 --> 00:18:24,352
Thank you.
Sure.
506
00:18:27,564 --> 00:18:29,441
Sir?
507
00:18:29,733 --> 00:18:30,984
He said no.
508
00:18:32,485 --> 00:18:33,653
Then he offered me $7 million
509
00:18:33,945 --> 00:18:35,780
to reprise my role
as Cocoa the dog.
510
00:18:36,072 --> 00:18:37,240
♪ I'm gonna get an iPhone ♪
511
00:18:37,532 --> 00:18:39,200
♪ Everybody's gonna be jealous ♪
512
00:18:39,492 --> 00:18:41,411
No, I turned him down.
513
00:18:41,703 --> 00:18:44,414
It's like a roller-coaster ride
of emotion in here.
514
00:18:44,706 --> 00:18:46,426
Look, Thomas Jefferson made
his own country.
515
00:18:46,666 --> 00:18:48,043
I'm gonna make my own movie.
516
00:18:48,335 --> 00:18:50,253
Finance it myself,
all on my terms.
517
00:18:50,545 --> 00:18:51,212
Now, who's with me?
518
00:18:51,504 --> 00:18:52,213
We all are, sir.
519
00:18:52,505 --> 00:18:53,673
Good, good, good.
520
00:18:53,965 --> 00:18:55,383
Now, first order of business,
521
00:18:55,675 --> 00:18:57,135
get that dead horse
out of my car.
522
00:18:59,137 --> 00:19:03,808
Well, I'm sorry your friend
wasn't pleased with the Stubbs.
523
00:19:04,100 --> 00:19:06,978
Yes, so am I.
524
00:19:07,270 --> 00:19:08,730
You seem very preoccupied.
525
00:19:09,022 --> 00:19:12,275
Well, it's just...
526
00:19:12,567 --> 00:19:14,235
people don't like
fireworks anymore.
527
00:19:14,527 --> 00:19:15,527
Were you aware of that?
528
00:19:15,654 --> 00:19:16,881
They took away
the microwave division.
529
00:19:16,905 --> 00:19:18,265
I'm having terrible
Lemon problems.
530
00:19:18,323 --> 00:19:19,323
I'm eating all the time.
531
00:19:19,532 --> 00:19:21,451
I mean, who needs
16 flautas after midnight?
532
00:19:21,743 --> 00:19:22,869
Mr. Donaghy...
533
00:19:26,623 --> 00:19:27,623
Jack.
534
00:19:29,542 --> 00:19:30,210
Listen, if you're
still interested,
535
00:19:30,502 --> 00:19:32,837
there is another piece
I'd like to show you
536
00:19:33,129 --> 00:19:34,506
that you might enjoy.
537
00:19:34,798 --> 00:19:37,509
I'll need to take you back
to the private office.
538
00:19:37,801 --> 00:19:40,428
This piece is very delicate.
539
00:19:40,720 --> 00:19:42,806
Very few people have handled it.
540
00:19:44,557 --> 00:19:45,701
Oh, God, I hope we're talking
541
00:19:45,725 --> 00:19:49,229
about the same thing.
542
00:19:50,980 --> 00:19:52,273
May I speak with you?
543
00:19:52,565 --> 00:19:53,626
If this is about
the other night,
544
00:19:53,650 --> 00:19:54,776
I am not gonna apologize.
545
00:19:55,068 --> 00:19:56,253
This whole Floyd thing...
No, no, no.
546
00:19:56,277 --> 00:19:57,904
You're absolutely right.
547
00:19:58,196 --> 00:19:59,632
I have to make some changes
in my life,
548
00:19:59,656 --> 00:20:01,032
just like you have.
549
00:20:01,324 --> 00:20:03,952
Phoebe and I are
seeing each other.
550
00:20:04,244 --> 00:20:06,246
Really?
551
00:20:06,538 --> 00:20:07,080
Wow, that's great.
552
00:20:07,372 --> 00:20:11,042
Now you have a Floydster,
and I have a Floydster.
553
00:20:11,334 --> 00:20:13,461
Well, I don't think
Phoebe would appreciate
554
00:20:13,753 --> 00:20:15,380
being referred to
as a Floydster.
555
00:20:15,672 --> 00:20:17,298
But you like her?
You approve?
556
00:20:17,590 --> 00:20:18,800
Of what?
Of her for me.
557
00:20:19,092 --> 00:20:20,343
Yeah, sure.
558
00:20:20,635 --> 00:20:21,635
Good.
559
00:20:21,720 --> 00:20:22,720
Hello, I'm Phoebe.
560
00:20:22,929 --> 00:20:24,073
I don't know
if you remember me, but...
561
00:20:24,097 --> 00:20:25,849
Yes, Phoebe, I remember you.
562
00:20:26,141 --> 00:20:27,141
Hi.
563
00:20:27,183 --> 00:20:28,183
May I ask you something?
564
00:20:29,853 --> 00:20:31,187
Uh, Phoebe,
565
00:20:31,479 --> 00:20:32,731
I want you to be my wife.
566
00:20:33,022 --> 00:20:34,399
Wait, what?
567
00:20:36,276 --> 00:20:37,444
Will you marry me?
568
00:20:37,736 --> 00:20:38,153
No!
569
00:20:38,445 --> 00:20:40,029
The ruby diamond cluster!
570
00:20:40,321 --> 00:20:42,699
I bought it back
from the anonymous Arab.
571
00:20:42,991 --> 00:20:44,451
How romantic.
572
00:20:46,244 --> 00:20:47,579
Ow.
573
00:20:49,456 --> 00:20:51,332
I'm sorry.
Ow.
574
00:20:51,624 --> 00:20:52,083
Okay.
575
00:20:52,375 --> 00:20:55,420
Oh, boy.
Ow.
576
00:20:55,712 --> 00:20:57,547
Careful, my bones.
38439
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