All language subtitles for 2.Broke.Girls.S05E21.And.the.Ten.Inches.1080p.AMZN.WEBRip.DD5.1.x264-CasStudio_track3_[eng]

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek Download
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,802 --> 00:00:03,404 Miss, I'm done here. 2 00:00:03,437 --> 00:00:04,638 Oh, I've been done here for years. 3 00:00:04,672 --> 00:00:06,774 You don't see me getting a parade. 4 00:00:06,807 --> 00:00:09,543 (generator hums) 5 00:00:09,577 --> 00:00:11,745 OLEG: Oh, looks like we lost electricity. 6 00:00:11,779 --> 00:00:16,584 Uh-oh, all the food in the refrigerator will go worse. 7 00:00:16,617 --> 00:00:18,519 EARL: Is it a bad sign that 8 00:00:18,552 --> 00:00:22,056 I can actually see everything better? 9 00:00:22,090 --> 00:00:25,659 Well, we finally found lighting that made the food look edible. 10 00:00:25,693 --> 00:00:27,528 Yeah, it's almost dark enough for Caroline 11 00:00:27,561 --> 00:00:30,064 to agree to have sex in here. 12 00:00:30,098 --> 00:00:34,034 Max, have you ever seen balls in light? 13 00:00:35,236 --> 00:00:37,605 They're not pretty. 14 00:00:37,638 --> 00:00:40,408 HAN: Nobody panic! 15 00:00:40,441 --> 00:00:42,276 The power is out in the whole building. 16 00:00:42,310 --> 00:00:47,148 We've got less energy than a Steely Dan concert. 17 00:00:47,181 --> 00:00:48,816 Han, you look exactly like 18 00:00:48,849 --> 00:00:52,220 a Doozer from "Fraggle Rock" right now. 19 00:00:52,253 --> 00:00:54,322 All right, we've got to keep the diner safe 20 00:00:54,355 --> 00:00:56,290 from hooligans and looters. 21 00:00:56,324 --> 00:00:58,226 You're still on the clock! 22 00:00:58,259 --> 00:01:01,462 And you're on my foot. 23 00:01:01,495 --> 00:01:04,732 Sorry, Earl, I can't see you in the dark.... 24 00:01:06,700 --> 00:01:09,637 But not in a racist way. 25 00:01:09,670 --> 00:01:12,373 And I can't see you in the light 26 00:01:12,406 --> 00:01:14,442 in a short way. 27 00:01:14,475 --> 00:01:16,844 Han, who would loot this diner? 28 00:01:16,877 --> 00:01:20,648 Unless they're looters looking specifically for disappointment. 29 00:01:25,353 --> 00:01:26,587 Max? 30 00:01:26,620 --> 00:01:28,722 Just taking this vodka 31 00:01:28,756 --> 00:01:31,091 and cash register to a safe place. 32 00:01:32,426 --> 00:01:34,628 (Peter Bjorn and John) * Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh 33 00:01:34,662 --> 00:01:36,430 (cash register bell dings) 34 00:01:36,464 --> 00:01:41,702 * Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh 35 00:01:46,340 --> 00:01:48,642 Our new dessert bar is under construction 36 00:01:48,676 --> 00:01:49,810 and it's not quite there yet. 37 00:01:49,843 --> 00:01:51,345 Kind of like the credit card bill 38 00:01:51,379 --> 00:01:53,247 I lied about mailing, 39 00:01:53,281 --> 00:01:56,917 but I've chosen you two to be the first to get a preview. 40 00:01:56,950 --> 00:01:59,553 She invited other people. They said, "No." 41 00:01:59,587 --> 00:02:02,756 She told me there would be some hard candy. 42 00:02:02,790 --> 00:02:05,926 Better be some hard candy. 43 00:02:05,959 --> 00:02:08,362 I have peppermints inside. 44 00:02:08,396 --> 00:02:10,764 Then we're fine. 45 00:02:14,268 --> 00:02:16,904 So it doesn't look like much now, 46 00:02:16,937 --> 00:02:19,773 but with a little moxie and a lot of work, 47 00:02:19,807 --> 00:02:21,442 it's gonna be gorgeous. 48 00:02:21,475 --> 00:02:23,711 Like KhloГ© Kardashian. 49 00:02:23,744 --> 00:02:27,147 Is that the one that's a dude now? 50 00:02:29,750 --> 00:02:33,321 Okay, where's my treat? 51 00:02:34,422 --> 00:02:35,556 Impressive, 52 00:02:35,589 --> 00:02:37,525 and you've stolen almost nothing 53 00:02:37,558 --> 00:02:39,627 from the diner to do this. 54 00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:44,665 Oh, wait, I see my sport coat is being used as a paint rag. 55 00:02:44,698 --> 00:02:47,201 That coat's yours? 56 00:02:47,235 --> 00:02:50,538 I thought it belonged to a service Chihuahua. 57 00:02:51,839 --> 00:02:54,842 Hey, everybody. 58 00:02:56,844 --> 00:02:59,813 Oh, yeah. 59 00:02:59,847 --> 00:03:02,383 Hubba, hubba, hot stuff. 60 00:03:02,416 --> 00:03:03,951 You know, if I were still single, 61 00:03:03,984 --> 00:03:07,288 I'd let you spackle my hole. 62 00:03:07,321 --> 00:03:10,491 You heard what she said, beefcake. 63 00:03:10,524 --> 00:03:11,792 I'm not gay. 64 00:03:11,825 --> 00:03:14,695 I'm just very pro-harassment. 65 00:03:14,728 --> 00:03:16,564 I'm proud of you, girls. 66 00:03:16,597 --> 00:03:18,566 You're making your dreams come true, 67 00:03:18,599 --> 00:03:21,569 and my dreams, too, assuming you'll allow me 68 00:03:21,602 --> 00:03:22,703 to start a tab here. 69 00:03:22,736 --> 00:03:25,439 I'll never pay. 70 00:03:25,473 --> 00:03:27,908 Does this mean you're not paying your tab at the diner? 71 00:03:27,941 --> 00:03:30,744 Uh-huh. 72 00:03:30,778 --> 00:03:31,912 Earl? 73 00:03:31,945 --> 00:03:34,282 He walks fast when he wants to. 74 00:03:35,716 --> 00:03:37,017 I gotta get going too. 75 00:03:37,050 --> 00:03:38,852 You know, we just came from the baby doctor, 76 00:03:38,886 --> 00:03:40,621 and he put me on bed rest. 77 00:03:40,654 --> 00:03:44,692 At first I thought the doctor said, "Bed arrest,' 78 00:03:44,725 --> 00:03:47,495 which is one of my favorite games. 79 00:03:47,528 --> 00:03:49,863 Sophie, what's wrong? Are you okay? 80 00:03:49,897 --> 00:03:52,266 Well, I'm five months along, 81 00:03:52,300 --> 00:03:54,335 and the baby already weighs 15 pounds, 82 00:03:54,368 --> 00:03:57,338 so the doctor's just a little worried. 83 00:03:57,371 --> 00:03:59,373 He's afraid it'll fall out 84 00:03:59,407 --> 00:04:02,610 like a watermelon through a plastic grocery bag. 85 00:04:03,811 --> 00:04:05,646 Come on, baby, let's get you in bed 86 00:04:05,679 --> 00:04:06,980 and get your legs up. 87 00:04:07,014 --> 00:04:08,849 I can't believe none of this has to do with sex. 88 00:04:08,882 --> 00:04:10,351 Yeah. 89 00:04:11,752 --> 00:04:12,886 Knock, knock. It's Randy. 90 00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:14,422 I got a six-pack... 91 00:04:15,789 --> 00:04:18,326 And I brought some beers. 92 00:04:18,359 --> 00:04:20,894 Who wants some warm, wet, deli beer? 93 00:04:20,928 --> 00:04:23,431 This is why you're the best boyfriend ever. 94 00:04:23,464 --> 00:04:25,566 Warm, wet deli beer is the official drink 95 00:04:25,599 --> 00:04:28,001 of my personality. 96 00:04:28,035 --> 00:04:29,803 So, Randy, look. 97 00:04:29,837 --> 00:04:32,072 What do you think of the new bar space? 98 00:04:32,105 --> 00:04:34,007 I've got a bar-related question. 99 00:04:34,041 --> 00:04:35,943 How you gonna fit in the bar? 100 00:04:35,976 --> 00:04:38,546 It's all right here on the blueprints, see? 101 00:04:38,579 --> 00:04:40,648 The bar goes here, so that leaves ten feet 102 00:04:40,681 --> 00:04:42,883 for the cafe tables and the front door entrance. 103 00:04:42,916 --> 00:04:45,486 Uh, you see this number ten right here? 104 00:04:45,519 --> 00:04:49,957 You see the two dashes after it? Those are inches, not feet. 105 00:04:51,592 --> 00:04:54,395 You got 10 inches. 106 00:04:54,428 --> 00:04:58,065 First time I've ever been disappointed with 10 inches. 107 00:05:00,067 --> 00:05:02,570 Well, that's the last time I get an architect 108 00:05:02,603 --> 00:05:06,106 from the "casual encounters" section of Craigslist. 109 00:05:06,139 --> 00:05:07,808 (knocking on wall) Ugh. 110 00:05:07,841 --> 00:05:10,811 The lady from the pizza place next door is banging back again. 111 00:05:10,844 --> 00:05:13,714 Yeah, they should pay less attention to our business 112 00:05:13,747 --> 00:05:15,416 and more attention to their own. 113 00:05:15,449 --> 00:05:17,084 There's so much oil on their pizza, 114 00:05:17,117 --> 00:05:18,986 the U.S. might invade it. 115 00:05:19,019 --> 00:05:20,354 RANDY: You know what? 116 00:05:20,388 --> 00:05:21,689 I think we've just 117 00:05:21,722 --> 00:05:22,923 blown past "warm beers." 118 00:05:22,956 --> 00:05:24,525 I'm gonna go get us some whiskey. 119 00:05:24,558 --> 00:05:27,327 10 inches always looks a whole lot bigger with bourbon. 120 00:05:29,497 --> 00:05:31,699 Oh, my God, Max, we need more space. 121 00:05:31,732 --> 00:05:34,868 I know; we spend way too much time together. 122 00:05:34,902 --> 00:05:36,370 Hey! 123 00:05:36,404 --> 00:05:40,474 Enough with the noise, cupcake bitches. 124 00:05:40,508 --> 00:05:44,512 You gotta stop with this freakin' racket already. 125 00:05:44,545 --> 00:05:47,415 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Calm down, Gina. 126 00:05:47,448 --> 00:05:49,683 What, 'cause I'm Italian, 127 00:05:49,717 --> 00:05:52,019 my name's gotta be Gina? 128 00:05:52,052 --> 00:05:55,856 It's Angie. Gina's my middle name. 129 00:05:55,889 --> 00:05:59,527 Oh, I thought your middle name was "bangs a lot." 130 00:06:00,761 --> 00:06:02,730 Angie, we're expanding our shop, 131 00:06:02,763 --> 00:06:04,698 and we have a permit for the construction, 132 00:06:04,732 --> 00:06:06,133 so it's above board. 133 00:06:06,166 --> 00:06:08,636 Which, yes, even I'm surprised about. 134 00:06:08,669 --> 00:06:11,171 You got a permit to destroy my business? 135 00:06:11,204 --> 00:06:14,508 Nobody wants to eat pizza 136 00:06:14,542 --> 00:06:17,911 next to this constant freaking racket. 137 00:06:17,945 --> 00:06:21,515 What's your freaking point? 138 00:06:21,549 --> 00:06:23,651 Max, I didn't know you spoke Italian. 139 00:06:25,052 --> 00:06:26,487 Follow me. 140 00:06:26,520 --> 00:06:28,856 I want yous to see the hell you're making. 141 00:06:28,889 --> 00:06:30,758 Um, that's a firm pass. 142 00:06:30,791 --> 00:06:32,660 -I'll throw in a free slice. -Okay. 143 00:06:38,866 --> 00:06:41,835 (video game beeping) 144 00:06:41,869 --> 00:06:43,103 See? 145 00:06:43,136 --> 00:06:44,538 See what you're doing to our office 146 00:06:44,572 --> 00:06:46,474 from all that banging next door? 147 00:06:46,507 --> 00:06:48,108 You're destroying it. 148 00:06:48,141 --> 00:06:50,110 Uh, look, you can't destroy a room 149 00:06:50,143 --> 00:06:53,681 that has this strong of a "hostage basement" vibe. 150 00:06:53,714 --> 00:06:56,817 You got cracks, and falling plaster, 151 00:06:56,850 --> 00:06:58,218 and my brother and I are fed up. 152 00:06:58,251 --> 00:07:00,020 Right, Angelo? 153 00:07:00,053 --> 00:07:01,922 He says, "Right." 154 00:07:01,955 --> 00:07:03,824 He's my twin. 155 00:07:03,857 --> 00:07:06,193 We agree with our minds. 156 00:07:06,226 --> 00:07:09,563 Um, Angie, when do we get that free slice? 157 00:07:09,597 --> 00:07:11,632 Not to be pushy, but a deal is a deal, 158 00:07:11,665 --> 00:07:13,834 and today's a carb day for me. 159 00:07:13,867 --> 00:07:16,737 (hammer banging on wall) 160 00:07:16,770 --> 00:07:18,238 What the frig? 161 00:07:18,271 --> 00:07:21,942 I just got my hair cut for our high school reunion. 162 00:07:21,975 --> 00:07:23,477 Now it's ruined. 163 00:07:23,511 --> 00:07:25,112 (hammer banging on wall) 164 00:07:25,145 --> 00:07:28,549 It's a frickin' war zone in here! 165 00:07:28,582 --> 00:07:30,951 My father would be turning in his grave 166 00:07:30,984 --> 00:07:34,488 if we'd been able to give him a proper burial. 167 00:07:34,522 --> 00:07:35,956 How you gonna make this right? 168 00:07:35,989 --> 00:07:38,225 Look, Angie and Angelo, 169 00:07:38,258 --> 00:07:40,260 we're sorry about the inconvenience, 170 00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:42,229 but it'll just be another week of construction. 171 00:07:42,262 --> 00:07:44,698 We promise to keep the noise down to a minimum. 172 00:07:44,732 --> 00:07:46,266 Right, Max? 173 00:07:46,299 --> 00:07:48,636 She's agreeing with her mind. 174 00:07:48,669 --> 00:07:51,839 Hey, just came by to see if everything's okay, 175 00:07:51,872 --> 00:07:54,508 and to say I've never seen the statue of David 176 00:07:54,542 --> 00:07:57,077 with a slice of pizza over his junk. 177 00:07:57,110 --> 00:08:00,247 Who's this hunk of gabbagoul? 178 00:08:00,280 --> 00:08:02,716 This hunk is Randy, and he's my-- 179 00:08:02,750 --> 00:08:06,286 Lawyer, and I'm sure he's here to make sure there's no problem. 180 00:08:06,319 --> 00:08:07,855 There's not problem, right, Angie? 181 00:08:07,888 --> 00:08:11,659 The only problem I see now is that shirt on him. 182 00:08:14,762 --> 00:08:16,797 Hi, I'm Angie, 183 00:08:16,830 --> 00:08:21,134 but I'm thinking about changing my name to yours. 184 00:08:21,168 --> 00:08:24,037 Props, that's a good line. 185 00:08:24,071 --> 00:08:27,140 So, Angie, what do you think? 186 00:08:27,174 --> 00:08:29,109 Can you stand another week of the construction? 187 00:08:29,142 --> 00:08:32,112 (clicks tongue) All right. 188 00:08:32,145 --> 00:08:33,914 I'll give yous two another week, 189 00:08:33,947 --> 00:08:35,749 'cause of Randy here, 190 00:08:35,783 --> 00:08:38,185 but that's the last thing I ever do for you two. 191 00:08:38,218 --> 00:08:42,022 You, I'd do whatever you want.. 192 00:08:42,055 --> 00:08:46,026 tonight and in perpetuity. 193 00:08:46,059 --> 00:08:47,628 "Perpetuity"? 194 00:08:47,661 --> 00:08:51,531 Better not be Italian for "the butt." 195 00:08:58,739 --> 00:09:00,040 Guys, 196 00:09:00,073 --> 00:09:03,577 I have a genius idea to fix the dessert bar problem. 197 00:09:04,778 --> 00:09:06,647 What if somehow we could convince Angie 198 00:09:06,680 --> 00:09:09,950 to let us break through the wall and rent out their back office? 199 00:09:12,185 --> 00:09:13,654 Come on! 200 00:09:13,687 --> 00:09:16,624 This is a genius idea. 201 00:09:16,657 --> 00:09:19,292 Their business is struggling, 202 00:09:19,326 --> 00:09:21,895 and we could pay them rent. 203 00:09:21,929 --> 00:09:23,631 It's either that or we have to use 204 00:09:23,664 --> 00:09:25,999 dollhouse furniture for the dessert bar. 205 00:09:26,033 --> 00:09:27,167 You know what? She's right. 206 00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:28,836 It is a good idea. 207 00:09:28,869 --> 00:09:31,371 You just gotta figure out a way to get on Angie's good side. 208 00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:34,708 Maybe you bring her a bouquet of cigarettes. 209 00:09:34,742 --> 00:09:37,945 Okay, Caroline, the only thing Angie likes about us is him, 210 00:09:37,978 --> 00:09:40,814 and honestly, the only thing I like about us is him. 211 00:09:40,848 --> 00:09:43,050 That's perfect; we should bring Randy over there 212 00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:44,351 when we go ask her. 213 00:09:44,384 --> 00:09:47,020 Randy, this has got to work, 214 00:09:47,054 --> 00:09:48,321 so wear a tight shirt, 215 00:09:48,355 --> 00:09:50,724 and maybe put a little Parmesan behind your ears. 216 00:09:53,861 --> 00:09:55,863 (video game beeping) (construction banging) 217 00:09:55,896 --> 00:09:57,965 Uh. 218 00:09:57,998 --> 00:10:01,368 So, Angelo, any idea when your sister is getting back? 219 00:10:01,401 --> 00:10:04,204 (video game music) 220 00:10:04,237 --> 00:10:07,875 Well, it is a long commute from hell. 221 00:10:07,908 --> 00:10:10,310 Oh... 222 00:10:10,343 --> 00:10:11,845 Hi, Randy. 223 00:10:11,879 --> 00:10:15,348 I would make out with you, but I just got a manicure, 224 00:10:15,382 --> 00:10:18,351 and I like to use my nails. 225 00:10:19,286 --> 00:10:21,889 Next time. 226 00:10:21,922 --> 00:10:24,391 So we came here with a business proposition, 227 00:10:24,424 --> 00:10:26,694 and some delicious cupcakes. 228 00:10:26,727 --> 00:10:28,061 I'll need the plate back. 229 00:10:28,095 --> 00:10:30,297 Get those away from me! 230 00:10:30,330 --> 00:10:32,966 I'm going to my reunion in a dress so tight 231 00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:35,068 you could see the kidney Angelo gave me 232 00:10:35,102 --> 00:10:39,272 from when I had renal failure from drinking too much Tab. 233 00:10:40,774 --> 00:10:43,877 First of all, Angie, Max and I are so glad 234 00:10:43,911 --> 00:10:46,914 to hear that you pulled through from the renal failure, 235 00:10:46,947 --> 00:10:49,883 but the real reason we're here is-- 236 00:10:49,917 --> 00:10:52,352 did you see Randy? 237 00:10:52,385 --> 00:10:53,721 Look, let's move this along. 238 00:10:53,754 --> 00:10:54,888 We want to bust through this wall 239 00:10:54,922 --> 00:10:56,423 and rent your little pizza hut here. 240 00:10:56,456 --> 00:10:57,758 Well, I'm in charge, 241 00:10:57,791 --> 00:10:59,226 and I'm not renting to yous two. 242 00:10:59,259 --> 00:11:00,861 I don't have time for this. 243 00:11:00,894 --> 00:11:03,196 I still don't have a date for my reunion tomorrow, 244 00:11:03,230 --> 00:11:04,965 and this stress is bad for my face. 245 00:11:04,998 --> 00:11:08,368 I already have more filler than a two-hour "Dateline." 246 00:11:11,171 --> 00:11:13,406 Angie, how does a woman like you 247 00:11:13,440 --> 00:11:15,776 not have a date for your reunion? 248 00:11:15,809 --> 00:11:17,778 I mean, not to be too forward, 249 00:11:17,811 --> 00:11:20,113 but hot magenta really brings out your eyes. 250 00:11:20,147 --> 00:11:23,183 Well, you're not wrong. 251 00:11:23,216 --> 00:11:25,953 You know what would be wrong? 252 00:11:25,986 --> 00:11:28,321 If Randy didn't take you 253 00:11:28,355 --> 00:11:31,124 to your reunion tomorrow night. 254 00:11:31,158 --> 00:11:34,327 Do you want to be punched in the face with my ring hand? 255 00:11:34,361 --> 00:11:36,029 RANDY: You know what? 256 00:11:36,063 --> 00:11:37,898 That... 257 00:11:37,931 --> 00:11:40,300 is a great idea. 258 00:11:40,333 --> 00:11:43,971 Angie, I would be honored to take your to your reunion. 259 00:11:44,004 --> 00:11:45,238 Oh, my God! 260 00:11:45,272 --> 00:11:47,941 Really? 261 00:11:47,975 --> 00:11:50,811 What about Angelo? What's he supposed to do? 262 00:11:50,844 --> 00:11:55,448 Angelo, do you want to bring one of these two to the reunion? 263 00:11:55,482 --> 00:11:58,351 They're not my type. 264 00:11:58,385 --> 00:12:00,854 Two fives make a ten, right? 265 00:12:06,126 --> 00:12:07,995 Oleg! (bell dings) 266 00:12:08,028 --> 00:12:10,130 I know we don't really have standards here, 267 00:12:10,163 --> 00:12:14,401 but the customer said that her steak shouldn't do this. 268 00:12:16,536 --> 00:12:21,174 Well, tell her not to turn the plate upside down then. 269 00:12:21,208 --> 00:12:22,976 I'm FaceTiming with Sophie. 270 00:12:23,010 --> 00:12:24,111 She's lonely. 271 00:12:24,144 --> 00:12:27,047 Say "hi" to Caroline. 272 00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:29,917 I'm not that lonely. 273 00:12:29,950 --> 00:12:33,220 Ugh, I just scrubbed a table. 274 00:12:33,253 --> 00:12:34,822 That is how upset I am. 275 00:12:34,855 --> 00:12:37,390 I should have never let Randy go to that reunion. 276 00:12:37,424 --> 00:12:39,292 And I should have never 277 00:12:39,326 --> 00:12:42,562 let Buddy Holly get on that plane, 278 00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:44,031 but what're you gonna do? 279 00:12:44,064 --> 00:12:47,367 Other than play it over and over again 280 00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:50,103 in your mind for 60 years. 281 00:12:50,137 --> 00:12:52,005 Max, it'll all be worth it 282 00:12:52,039 --> 00:12:54,041 when we get that extra space for our dessert bar. 283 00:12:54,074 --> 00:12:56,543 Why would God make Randy look like that 284 00:12:56,576 --> 00:12:59,146 if not to help us get stuff? 285 00:12:59,179 --> 00:13:00,814 I'm worried about Randy. 286 00:13:00,848 --> 00:13:02,482 He is strong, but she has the strength 287 00:13:02,515 --> 00:13:04,451 of ten horny women. 288 00:13:04,484 --> 00:13:07,020 Somebody talk to me. 289 00:13:07,054 --> 00:13:09,122 I'm dying here. 290 00:13:09,156 --> 00:13:12,425 I just watched all eight seasons of "Perfect Strangers." 291 00:13:12,459 --> 00:13:15,896 I'm--I'm just--I'm-- I'm Balki'd out. 292 00:13:16,997 --> 00:13:19,900 I just felt a shift in the force. 293 00:13:19,933 --> 00:13:22,469 Did somebody clean a table over there? 294 00:13:22,502 --> 00:13:23,904 Is everything okay? 295 00:13:23,937 --> 00:13:25,906 She's upset because Angie 296 00:13:25,939 --> 00:13:27,975 from the pizza parlor next door needed a date 297 00:13:28,008 --> 00:13:30,310 to her high school reunion, and Randy took her. 298 00:13:30,343 --> 00:13:32,379 Well, that's hurtful. 299 00:13:32,412 --> 00:13:34,447 I've asked Angie out twice. 300 00:13:34,481 --> 00:13:37,450 They're not on a real date, Han. 301 00:13:37,484 --> 00:13:39,319 He's just trying to convince her 302 00:13:39,352 --> 00:13:40,888 to let us rent their back office. 303 00:13:40,921 --> 00:13:42,923 Randy's wasting his time. 304 00:13:42,956 --> 00:13:45,458 It's actually Angie's delightful brother Angelo 305 00:13:45,492 --> 00:13:47,060 who controls the lease. 306 00:13:47,094 --> 00:13:49,362 Angelo's in charge? 307 00:13:49,396 --> 00:13:52,132 Angelo's "delightful"? 308 00:13:52,165 --> 00:13:55,268 Ugh, I am so bored 309 00:13:55,302 --> 00:13:59,472 that I just got a degree from DeVry University. 310 00:14:00,640 --> 00:14:04,011 So she tricked Randy 311 00:14:04,044 --> 00:14:05,545 into going to that reunion with her? 312 00:14:05,578 --> 00:14:07,614 (scoffs) I am going to the high school 313 00:14:07,647 --> 00:14:09,382 to get my man back-- oh, my God, 314 00:14:09,416 --> 00:14:11,384 I sound just like my mother. 315 00:14:11,418 --> 00:14:13,653 We should go there and sweet-talk Angelo 316 00:14:13,686 --> 00:14:15,288 into giving us the space. 317 00:14:15,322 --> 00:14:17,624 Oh, but we're "not his type," 318 00:14:17,657 --> 00:14:19,626 which is a shame, because I really wanted some of 319 00:14:19,659 --> 00:14:22,896 that 50-year-old video-game-addict money. 320 00:14:22,930 --> 00:14:25,232 Well, where are we gonna get tacky dresses 321 00:14:25,265 --> 00:14:27,100 and hair from 1986? 322 00:14:27,134 --> 00:14:28,201 (gasps) 323 00:14:28,235 --> 00:14:30,637 I can make you look like it's 1986 324 00:14:30,670 --> 00:14:34,908 'cause I lived in Poland in 2003! 325 00:14:38,278 --> 00:14:41,248 (upbeat '80s music) 326 00:14:41,281 --> 00:14:47,387 * 327 00:14:47,420 --> 00:14:49,489 How you doin'? 328 00:14:49,522 --> 00:14:53,393 How you doin'? 329 00:14:53,426 --> 00:14:55,695 How you doin'? 330 00:14:55,728 --> 00:14:58,198 MAX: Oh, Jimmy Vecchio! 331 00:14:58,231 --> 00:15:01,401 It's Max...Blackilini. 332 00:15:01,434 --> 00:15:03,503 Doesn't ring a bell. 333 00:15:03,536 --> 00:15:04,671 What about me? 334 00:15:04,704 --> 00:15:06,173 It's Caroline... 335 00:15:06,206 --> 00:15:09,009 uh, Cacciatore! 336 00:15:09,042 --> 00:15:12,712 Didn't we take math together with Mr. Bag-a-two-shoes? 337 00:15:12,745 --> 00:15:14,514 Never heard of him. 338 00:15:14,547 --> 00:15:17,317 BOTH: Eh! -Forget about it. 339 00:15:19,219 --> 00:15:20,353 Oh, there's Angelo 340 00:15:20,387 --> 00:15:21,654 dancing by himself. 341 00:15:21,688 --> 00:15:23,957 No surprise there. 342 00:15:23,991 --> 00:15:27,127 Wow, I've never seen a sweat-suit tux. 343 00:15:28,328 --> 00:15:29,462 Angelo. 344 00:15:29,496 --> 00:15:31,364 It's Max and Caroline 345 00:15:31,398 --> 00:15:32,632 from next door. 346 00:15:32,665 --> 00:15:34,301 Um, you probably don't recognize us. 347 00:15:34,334 --> 00:15:36,403 I'm hoping no one does. 348 00:15:36,436 --> 00:15:38,305 What? I can't hear you 349 00:15:38,338 --> 00:15:40,307 with the babe alarm going off. 350 00:15:40,340 --> 00:15:43,443 Whee-ooh, whee-ooh. 351 00:15:43,476 --> 00:15:47,314 Oh, well, same to you. 352 00:15:47,347 --> 00:15:49,616 What is that, terry cloth? 353 00:15:49,649 --> 00:15:52,119 Actually, we came here to talk to you 354 00:15:52,152 --> 00:15:53,353 because we wanted to ask you 355 00:15:53,386 --> 00:15:55,088 about renting out your back office. 356 00:15:55,122 --> 00:15:56,723 We know you're the big cheese. 357 00:15:56,756 --> 00:15:58,758 You know, since you're here, 358 00:15:58,791 --> 00:16:00,460 maybe we, uh, cut a rug? 359 00:16:00,493 --> 00:16:04,964 She hasn't cut her rug in about four months, so... 360 00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:10,070 We could, uh, start off on the dance floor, 361 00:16:10,103 --> 00:16:12,105 and if we happen to end up 362 00:16:12,139 --> 00:16:15,275 in the back of an '86 Cutlass Supreme, 363 00:16:15,308 --> 00:16:17,644 so be it. 364 00:16:17,677 --> 00:16:20,647 So be it. Forget about it. 365 00:16:20,680 --> 00:16:22,082 Excuse us. 366 00:16:22,115 --> 00:16:24,517 Max, I am not a whore. 367 00:16:24,551 --> 00:16:28,188 That's not what your hair, dress, and makeup say. 368 00:16:28,221 --> 00:16:31,358 Look, you pimped Randy out for that extra space, 369 00:16:31,391 --> 00:16:32,592 and now it's your turn. 370 00:16:32,625 --> 00:16:34,694 You want that back room, make it happen. 371 00:16:34,727 --> 00:16:37,497 On the count of three, 372 00:16:37,530 --> 00:16:39,632 say "sex." 373 00:16:40,667 --> 00:16:42,569 You handle Angelo. 374 00:16:42,602 --> 00:16:44,204 I've been wanting to kill someone 375 00:16:44,237 --> 00:16:46,773 for using a selfie stick, and she is the lucky one. 376 00:16:46,806 --> 00:16:50,077 Angie, God rest your soul, 377 00:16:50,110 --> 00:16:52,645 get your hands off my boyfriend. 378 00:16:52,679 --> 00:16:54,747 (laughing) Max, what're you doing here? 379 00:16:54,781 --> 00:16:57,217 Please tell me that's a wig. 380 00:16:57,250 --> 00:16:59,252 She tricked you into coming here. 381 00:16:59,286 --> 00:17:01,588 She is not in charge of the pizza place. 382 00:17:01,621 --> 00:17:05,392 Her brother is. This is my hair. 383 00:17:05,425 --> 00:17:07,194 Angie, is that true? 384 00:17:07,227 --> 00:17:09,529 Did I do the Electric Slide for nothing? 385 00:17:09,562 --> 00:17:10,797 Well, not for nothing. 386 00:17:10,830 --> 00:17:14,367 We came in second in the dance competition. 387 00:17:14,401 --> 00:17:16,536 Okay, fine, it's true. 388 00:17:16,569 --> 00:17:18,671 Angelo's in charge. 389 00:17:18,705 --> 00:17:20,673 My father thought he was the smarter one 390 00:17:20,707 --> 00:17:23,343 because he wore glasses as a kid. 391 00:17:23,376 --> 00:17:26,146 Randy, are you okay? 392 00:17:26,179 --> 00:17:29,682 Did the bad lady touch you in any of the good places? 393 00:17:29,716 --> 00:17:32,185 Look, I'm sorry I lied, 394 00:17:32,219 --> 00:17:34,487 but for what it's worth, I'm having the night of my life. 395 00:17:34,521 --> 00:17:37,824 Believe it or not, I wasn't popular in high school. 396 00:17:37,857 --> 00:17:39,692 I didn't date a football player 397 00:17:39,726 --> 00:17:42,462 or get pregnant. 398 00:17:42,495 --> 00:17:45,098 For once, I just wanted to show up a winner. 399 00:17:45,132 --> 00:17:47,734 -Hey, Ange! -Oh, no. 400 00:17:47,767 --> 00:17:49,169 Here comes Michelle Pascucci. 401 00:17:49,202 --> 00:17:51,471 Please, don't ruin this for me. 402 00:17:52,739 --> 00:17:54,207 Who's this, Ange? 403 00:17:54,241 --> 00:17:56,409 What's she doing holding on to your fiancГ© 404 00:17:56,443 --> 00:17:59,746 like he's the last cannoli at a wake? 405 00:18:01,248 --> 00:18:04,417 Forgot to tell you, I got engaged. 406 00:18:04,451 --> 00:18:05,718 Wait. 407 00:18:05,752 --> 00:18:08,588 Unless that's not really your boyfriend. 408 00:18:08,621 --> 00:18:12,359 'Cause, uh, you're known to lie. 409 00:18:12,392 --> 00:18:14,527 Well... 410 00:18:14,561 --> 00:18:16,529 she's not lying. 411 00:18:16,563 --> 00:18:19,832 He's been cheating on me with her for years. 412 00:18:19,866 --> 00:18:23,436 I, uh, caught 'em at the Olive Garden. 413 00:18:25,405 --> 00:18:27,807 I smell a catfight, 414 00:18:27,840 --> 00:18:30,643 and Drakkar Noir. 415 00:18:30,677 --> 00:18:32,779 Catfight! 416 00:18:32,812 --> 00:18:35,915 -Oh, come here, bitch. CROWD: Oh! 417 00:18:35,948 --> 00:18:38,651 -Just follow my lead. -Okay, careful. 418 00:18:38,685 --> 00:18:40,520 I spent $65 on my hair. 419 00:18:40,553 --> 00:18:43,423 I was hoping not to touch it till next week. 420 00:18:43,456 --> 00:18:47,260 -Don't touch my arm, bitch! CROWD: Oh! 421 00:18:47,294 --> 00:18:49,896 Oh, I shouldn't touch your arm? 422 00:18:49,929 --> 00:18:53,433 Maybe you shouldn't touch my guy. 423 00:18:53,466 --> 00:18:55,235 CROWD: [gasps] 424 00:18:55,268 --> 00:18:58,238 Finally, this party's getting good. 425 00:18:58,271 --> 00:19:00,540 (quietly) Push me back. 426 00:19:00,573 --> 00:19:02,209 CROWD: Oh! 427 00:19:02,242 --> 00:19:04,177 Did you just push me? 428 00:19:04,211 --> 00:19:06,913 Yeah, I pushed you, 429 00:19:06,946 --> 00:19:10,317 but not as hard as your boyfriend 430 00:19:10,350 --> 00:19:13,486 was pushing me in the back of the car. 431 00:19:13,520 --> 00:19:16,556 Oh, hell no, bitch! 432 00:19:16,589 --> 00:19:18,691 -Now-- CROWD: OH! 433 00:19:18,725 --> 00:19:22,662 I told you not to touch my hair! 434 00:19:22,695 --> 00:19:24,864 CROWD: Oh! -Oh, my God! 435 00:19:24,897 --> 00:19:27,700 She's got a freakin' knife! 436 00:19:27,734 --> 00:19:29,769 All right, I'm out, 437 00:19:29,802 --> 00:19:31,904 but only because... 438 00:19:31,938 --> 00:19:33,806 I'm on parole 439 00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:37,710 for pulling out a woman's bangs on the F Train. 440 00:19:37,744 --> 00:19:39,812 Let's get out of here, Ange. 441 00:19:39,846 --> 00:19:41,548 Is my hair dented? 442 00:19:41,581 --> 00:19:45,252 I'll fix it, hun. I got a chopstick in my purse. 443 00:19:48,755 --> 00:19:50,690 Get over here, you sloppy second. 444 00:19:50,723 --> 00:19:51,924 Wow. 445 00:19:51,958 --> 00:19:54,727 I kind of like having a knight in shining-- 446 00:19:54,761 --> 00:19:57,364 what is this, aluminum foil? 447 00:19:57,397 --> 00:19:59,899 Well, it is warming up the ravioli I put in my bra. 448 00:19:59,932 --> 00:20:01,668 (George Michael's "Careless Whisper") 449 00:20:01,701 --> 00:20:03,736 Max, can I have this dance? 450 00:20:03,770 --> 00:20:08,808 * 451 00:20:08,841 --> 00:20:11,578 So you think you and I would have dated in high school? 452 00:20:11,611 --> 00:20:14,681 Well, when I was in high school, you were in your 30s, 453 00:20:14,714 --> 00:20:15,848 so... 454 00:20:15,882 --> 00:20:17,784 yeah, that sounds right. 455 00:20:17,817 --> 00:20:21,554 I just convinced Angelo to let us rent the back office. 456 00:20:21,588 --> 00:20:23,990 I mean, I may have to be his date to the Auto Show. 457 00:20:24,023 --> 00:20:25,958 Wear something nice. 458 00:20:25,992 --> 00:20:27,960 Like a silk blouse 459 00:20:27,994 --> 00:20:29,862 or a bikini. 460 00:20:29,896 --> 00:20:31,030 * 461 00:20:31,063 --> 00:20:33,733 He wants to show me off. 462 00:20:33,766 --> 00:20:37,504 I never went to anything like this. 463 00:20:37,537 --> 00:20:38,905 A reunion or a prom 464 00:20:38,938 --> 00:20:40,873 or a class. 465 00:20:40,907 --> 00:20:42,409 What do you do at these things? 466 00:20:42,442 --> 00:20:44,911 MICHAEL: * I'm never gonna dance again 467 00:20:44,944 --> 00:20:48,448 * Guilty feet have got no rhythm * 468 00:20:48,481 --> 00:20:50,783 * Though it's easy to pretend 469 00:20:50,817 --> 00:20:53,453 * I know you're not a fool (cash register dings) 33303

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.