All language subtitles for Sister Boniface Mysteries Season 03 e03

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:14,400 --> 00:00:22,240 {\an8}## 2 00:00:22,320 --> 00:00:27,760 {\an8}## 3 00:00:27,840 --> 00:00:32,320 {\an8}## 4 00:00:32,400 --> 00:00:34,560 Professor, we've been detected. 5 00:00:34,640 --> 00:00:36,560 We must dissipate immediately! 6 00:00:36,640 --> 00:00:39,960 Impossible, my dear. The console is inoperative. 7 00:00:43,440 --> 00:00:45,440 Ha-ha. Thank you. 8 00:00:45,520 --> 00:00:48,760 Something had been meddling with the -- the, um... 9 00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:50,120 - Uh... - Circuitry? 10 00:00:50,200 --> 00:00:51,480 Yes, that. 11 00:00:51,560 --> 00:00:53,280 I'm beginning to think the problem 12 00:00:53,360 --> 00:00:56,000 is inside the spaceship itself. 13 00:00:57,400 --> 00:01:00,000 Charlie, it's a -- 14 00:01:00,080 --> 00:01:02,120 - A -- A -- - Zybok! 15 00:01:02,200 --> 00:01:05,400 The DARTIX has been penetrated! 16 00:01:05,480 --> 00:01:07,840 It is now under our control! 17 00:01:07,920 --> 00:01:11,440 You will take this ship over my dead body. 18 00:01:11,520 --> 00:01:13,120 As you command. 19 00:01:21,560 --> 00:01:25,720 {\an8}## 20 00:01:28,120 --> 00:01:31,880 {\an8}## 21 00:01:35,320 --> 00:01:37,680 - Professor? - Tis I. 22 00:01:37,760 --> 00:01:41,680 Come with me kid, we're going on an adventure. 23 00:01:42,920 --> 00:01:45,320 {\an8} 24 00:01:46,800 --> 00:01:49,520 {\an8} 25 00:01:49,600 --> 00:01:56,600 {\an8}## 26 00:01:56,680 --> 00:02:02,400 {\an8}## 27 00:02:02,480 --> 00:02:10,120 {\an8}## 28 00:02:10,200 --> 00:02:12,760 {\an8}I gather Mr Fabricant is here 29 00:02:12,840 --> 00:02:15,160 {\an8}for the, um, science-fiction 30 00:02:15,240 --> 00:02:18,040 {\an8}conference, um, thingy-me-whatsit. 31 00:02:18,120 --> 00:02:19,760 {\an8}I'm sure your fiancé would love it. 32 00:02:19,840 --> 00:02:22,160 Oh, no. Victoria, she's staying with her aunt in London. 33 00:02:22,240 --> 00:02:23,640 You know, she's seeing the sights 34 00:02:23,720 --> 00:02:25,320 and preparing for the wedding. 35 00:02:25,400 --> 00:02:28,160 Oh, I do love an excuse to buy a new hat! 36 00:02:28,240 --> 00:02:31,080 In any case, what is this conference for? 37 00:02:31,160 --> 00:02:33,320 And why it is in Great Slaughter? 38 00:02:33,400 --> 00:02:36,400 Professor Y, the fan club is here. 39 00:02:36,480 --> 00:02:38,680 Didn't Zybokmania make it over to Bermuda? 40 00:02:38,760 --> 00:02:41,320 Still got quite the following thanks to the repeats. 41 00:02:41,400 --> 00:02:43,640 Unfortunately, it finished a few years back. 42 00:02:43,720 --> 00:02:46,400 But mercifully, not the end of me. 43 00:02:46,480 --> 00:02:49,640 Or my acclaimed career. 44 00:02:49,720 --> 00:02:51,760 - Morning, Mr Fabricant. - Good morning. 45 00:02:51,840 --> 00:02:54,640 May I say how much I used to enjoy you 46 00:02:54,720 --> 00:02:56,160 in "Dixon of Dock Green"? 47 00:02:56,240 --> 00:02:58,240 You may indeed. 48 00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:02,120 Mr Fabricant, what have you been up to of late? 49 00:03:02,200 --> 00:03:04,040 Oh, I've gone back to my roots -- 50 00:03:04,120 --> 00:03:05,800 the stage. 51 00:03:05,880 --> 00:03:07,400 I have to say, it's quite surprising 52 00:03:07,480 --> 00:03:09,080 to have a famous actor, like yourself, 53 00:03:09,160 --> 00:03:10,680 staying with us at the Seaview. 54 00:03:10,760 --> 00:03:14,320 Oh, my dear boy, one prefers somewhere more... 55 00:03:14,400 --> 00:03:15,640 Rustic. 56 00:03:15,720 --> 00:03:17,880 Here we are, Mr Fabricant. 57 00:03:17,960 --> 00:03:19,960 Oh, what a treat. Thank you. 58 00:03:21,080 --> 00:03:22,840 I don't suppose I could trouble you 59 00:03:22,920 --> 00:03:25,280 for an autograph? 60 00:03:25,360 --> 00:03:27,160 How serendipitous. 61 00:03:27,240 --> 00:03:29,240 I shall be signing at the event. 62 00:03:30,760 --> 00:03:32,320 Two free tickets each. 63 00:03:32,400 --> 00:03:34,280 I insist. 64 00:03:36,080 --> 00:03:42,520 {\an8}## 65 00:03:42,600 --> 00:03:46,360 {\an8}## 66 00:03:46,440 --> 00:03:48,960 One, two. One, two. 67 00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:55,840 Regulation 13C -- 68 00:03:55,920 --> 00:03:59,600 the President will deal with all talent management. 69 00:03:59,680 --> 00:04:02,480 Lower-ranked individuals will distribute 70 00:04:02,560 --> 00:04:04,280 - the tea and the coffee. - It would be nice 71 00:04:04,360 --> 00:04:06,560 if Sister Peter and I could at least 72 00:04:06,640 --> 00:04:08,120 say hello to the actors. 73 00:04:08,200 --> 00:04:10,240 But they'll only want to speak to me, so -- 74 00:04:10,320 --> 00:04:13,360 Please, Roger, it's only fair considering 75 00:04:13,440 --> 00:04:15,560 everything I've contributed. 76 00:04:15,640 --> 00:04:16,880 Eugh, for -- 77 00:04:16,960 --> 00:04:19,320 Fine! 78 00:04:19,400 --> 00:04:22,000 I can't believe we're going to meet The Professor and Charlie 79 00:04:22,080 --> 00:04:24,520 - in the flesh! - Have some decorum? 80 00:04:25,960 --> 00:04:29,400 - Is now a good time? - Yes, yes. Um, it is. 81 00:04:29,480 --> 00:04:33,000 We, that is the "Professor Y" Appreciation Society, 82 00:04:33,080 --> 00:04:36,160 have made it our mission to revive the show. 83 00:04:36,240 --> 00:04:40,720 We've amassed a petition of 196 signatures 84 00:04:40,800 --> 00:04:43,720 to make the channel see the error of their ways. 85 00:04:43,800 --> 00:04:45,120 Have you signed it? 86 00:04:45,200 --> 00:04:46,680 Twice. 87 00:04:46,760 --> 00:04:49,440 I gather there's a special screening tomorrow? 88 00:04:49,520 --> 00:04:52,840 Of "Attack of the Zyboks"! 89 00:04:52,920 --> 00:04:55,200 The story unfinished due to the technicians strike in '61? 90 00:04:55,280 --> 00:04:57,320 - Mm-hm. - But how? 91 00:04:57,400 --> 00:04:59,080 Never you mind, Norman. 92 00:04:59,160 --> 00:05:01,360 It's time. 93 00:05:03,400 --> 00:05:05,520 Let the fans in! 94 00:05:12,640 --> 00:05:14,400 Welcome. Welcome. Come on. 95 00:05:14,480 --> 00:05:20,120 {\an8}## 96 00:05:20,200 --> 00:05:24,760 {\an8}## 97 00:05:27,640 --> 00:05:31,120 {\an8}## 98 00:05:31,200 --> 00:05:34,280 Yewillabevapurized! 99 00:05:36,640 --> 00:05:38,120 Tom, are you trying to give 100 00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:39,720 Mrs Clam a heart attack? 101 00:05:39,800 --> 00:05:41,880 It's nothing to be afraid of. 102 00:05:41,960 --> 00:05:44,160 This is my pride and joy -- 103 00:05:44,240 --> 00:05:45,800 the actual Zybok 104 00:05:45,880 --> 00:05:48,760 that zapped The Professor in the final episode. 105 00:05:48,840 --> 00:05:51,800 Nonsense. Utter gobbledegook! 106 00:05:52,880 --> 00:05:54,480 Thank you. 107 00:05:56,720 --> 00:06:00,160 {\an8}## 108 00:06:00,240 --> 00:06:03,760 I must say this is all jolly good fun. 109 00:06:05,800 --> 00:06:07,480 I knew you'd love it. 110 00:06:07,560 --> 00:06:09,040 I've always found the transcendentally 111 00:06:09,120 --> 00:06:10,440 dimensional nature of the spaceship 112 00:06:10,520 --> 00:06:12,240 especially fascinating. 113 00:06:12,320 --> 00:06:13,720 Sister Peter. 114 00:06:13,800 --> 00:06:15,200 Oh, look Sam. Aren't those endearing? 115 00:06:15,280 --> 00:06:16,840 - Mm. - Ah. 116 00:06:16,920 --> 00:06:20,440 Out of my price range alas. 117 00:06:20,520 --> 00:06:22,720 A gift from me to you. 118 00:06:22,800 --> 00:06:24,640 To say thank you for coming. 119 00:06:24,720 --> 00:06:26,360 Thank you so much. 120 00:06:26,440 --> 00:06:28,440 Enjoy. 121 00:06:30,680 --> 00:06:32,840 Why's Norman looking so glum? 122 00:06:32,920 --> 00:06:34,640 Oh, I thought he loved this show. 123 00:06:34,720 --> 00:06:37,000 Do you want to escape while you still can? 124 00:06:37,080 --> 00:06:43,640 {\an8}## 125 00:06:43,720 --> 00:06:45,720 Norman, what's wrong? 126 00:06:47,120 --> 00:06:48,920 Clem says I'm not pulling my weight. 127 00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:50,400 He's given me till first thing Monday morning 128 00:06:50,480 --> 00:06:52,480 to bring him a scoop. 129 00:06:52,560 --> 00:06:55,720 And a story about a dead TV show isn't going to cut it. 130 00:06:55,800 --> 00:06:57,920 Well -- Well, maybe one of the guests 131 00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:00,440 will give you an exclusive? 132 00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:04,680 Welcome to the world's first "Professor Y" Convention! 133 00:07:07,360 --> 00:07:09,960 I am your President, Roger Crabtree. 134 00:07:10,040 --> 00:07:13,640 But before we get going, a certain someone would like 135 00:07:13,720 --> 00:07:15,880 to say a few words... 136 00:07:23,480 --> 00:07:27,680 I've only got one thing to say. "Come with me, kids! 137 00:07:27,760 --> 00:07:31,600 We're all going on an adventure!" 138 00:07:33,160 --> 00:07:35,480 Coming later, Celeste Carmichael 139 00:07:35,560 --> 00:07:38,400 and the godlike genius behind the show, 140 00:07:38,480 --> 00:07:40,920 creator Douglas Wiseman! 141 00:07:49,520 --> 00:07:55,360 {\an8}## 142 00:07:58,440 --> 00:07:59,920 I am grateful, you know. 143 00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:01,520 That you listened. 144 00:08:01,600 --> 00:08:03,400 I'd just love to see what happens next. 145 00:08:03,480 --> 00:08:05,120 All in good time. 146 00:08:05,200 --> 00:08:07,840 First, there's an award to collect tomorrow evening. 147 00:08:07,920 --> 00:08:10,320 With you on my arm. 148 00:08:10,400 --> 00:08:12,040 Oh, God, it's him. 149 00:08:12,120 --> 00:08:14,520 - Think of the humungous fee. - True. 150 00:08:14,600 --> 00:08:18,040 But I'm not even touching one of those grubby little barkers. 151 00:08:18,120 --> 00:08:20,320 Hey! 152 00:08:20,400 --> 00:08:22,640 Welcome to our little celebration. 153 00:08:24,200 --> 00:08:26,720 This is the greatest honour of my life. 154 00:08:26,800 --> 00:08:28,240 The fee, up front. 155 00:08:28,320 --> 00:08:30,520 - Or no banana. - Of course, um... 156 00:08:30,600 --> 00:08:32,160 - Here you go. - Yep. 157 00:08:32,240 --> 00:08:34,880 And this telegram arrived for you earlier. 158 00:08:34,960 --> 00:08:36,960 Oh. 159 00:08:38,320 --> 00:08:40,480 Could I... 160 00:08:40,560 --> 00:08:44,000 perhaps tempt you to wear one of your old costumes? 161 00:08:44,080 --> 00:08:46,440 - I'm afraid, I don't have any. - You're in luck! 162 00:08:46,520 --> 00:08:49,560 I've collected quite a few of your old looks. 163 00:08:52,240 --> 00:08:54,120 Let's get this over with. 164 00:08:54,200 --> 00:09:01,120 {\an8}## 165 00:09:01,200 --> 00:09:03,040 {\an8}## 166 00:09:03,120 --> 00:09:06,120 You can depend on us, we will never give up the fight 167 00:09:06,200 --> 00:09:08,640 to bring your beloved show back. 168 00:09:08,720 --> 00:09:10,520 Don't bother on my account. 169 00:09:10,600 --> 00:09:12,200 I'm rather busy with my 170 00:09:12,280 --> 00:09:15,520 Society of Film and Television Arts nominated smash -- 171 00:09:15,600 --> 00:09:17,680 "The Ties that Bind." 172 00:09:17,760 --> 00:09:19,760 I see, um, well, 173 00:09:19,840 --> 00:09:21,920 I know a lot of people want some answers, 174 00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:23,680 so, I'll open it up to the floor. 175 00:09:23,760 --> 00:09:26,440 Howcurraleavusallanginlikat? Zip! 176 00:09:28,080 --> 00:09:29,560 Some sort of alien language? 177 00:09:29,640 --> 00:09:31,360 Uh, if I may? 178 00:09:31,440 --> 00:09:34,120 "How could you leave us all hanging on like that? Zap!" 179 00:09:36,160 --> 00:09:39,240 Ratings were in free fall, so, the channel pulled the plug. 180 00:09:39,320 --> 00:09:41,960 Which worked out rather well for me. 181 00:09:42,040 --> 00:09:43,440 - Miss Carmichael. - Yes. 182 00:09:43,520 --> 00:09:45,160 I do not approve of the way 183 00:09:45,240 --> 00:09:47,280 that young man is mistreating you 184 00:09:47,360 --> 00:09:49,000 in "The Ties that Bind." 185 00:09:49,080 --> 00:09:52,280 - Well... - It is a drama. 186 00:09:52,360 --> 00:09:53,840 Well, just make it stop. 187 00:09:53,920 --> 00:09:56,120 I am delighted to say that it will be. 188 00:09:56,200 --> 00:09:58,360 Can I just remind everyone that this isn't 189 00:09:58,440 --> 00:10:01,280 a "Ties that Bind" convention! 190 00:10:01,360 --> 00:10:03,760 - Perhaps, it should be. - Yes, you. 191 00:10:03,840 --> 00:10:05,520 Congratulations on the huge success 192 00:10:05,600 --> 00:10:07,200 that is "The Ties that Bind." 193 00:10:07,280 --> 00:10:08,760 I'd be honoured if you'd grant me an interview 194 00:10:08,840 --> 00:10:10,240 for the Albion Bugle? 195 00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:11,680 Someone with taste. 196 00:10:11,760 --> 00:10:13,800 Come by Slaughter Hotel in the morning. 197 00:10:17,600 --> 00:10:20,480 Is everything alright? 198 00:10:22,360 --> 00:10:25,000 To be utterly frank, no. 199 00:10:25,080 --> 00:10:28,320 You know, I've moved onto serious drama now, and frankly, 200 00:10:28,400 --> 00:10:31,000 I'd rather no one was reminded of this... 201 00:10:31,080 --> 00:10:32,440 puerile juvenilia. 202 00:10:32,520 --> 00:10:33,840 Come! 203 00:10:37,560 --> 00:10:41,280 What a thoroughly loathsome man! 204 00:10:43,640 --> 00:10:46,480 {\an8}## 205 00:10:46,560 --> 00:10:50,360 Just put it down. There. 206 00:10:50,440 --> 00:10:52,760 Douglas, what's wrong? 207 00:10:52,840 --> 00:10:56,320 Nothing that need concern your pretty little head. 208 00:10:56,400 --> 00:10:58,480 I must make a call. 209 00:10:58,560 --> 00:11:01,920 But after dinner, perhaps, you might join me for a swim... 210 00:11:02,000 --> 00:11:04,240 or a sauna? 211 00:11:04,320 --> 00:11:06,760 Alas, I need my beauty sleep. 212 00:11:06,840 --> 00:11:08,280 For the awards. 213 00:11:08,360 --> 00:11:10,440 I'll leave you to it, yes? 214 00:11:10,520 --> 00:11:16,200 {\an8}## 215 00:11:16,280 --> 00:11:19,840 {\an8}## 216 00:11:24,840 --> 00:11:30,840 {\an8}## 217 00:11:30,920 --> 00:11:33,200 {\an8}## 218 00:11:33,280 --> 00:11:35,000 There we are. 219 00:11:35,080 --> 00:11:37,960 Right, I think that's enough for 1 day. 220 00:11:38,040 --> 00:11:40,240 E-Excuse me, Mr Fabricant, 221 00:11:40,320 --> 00:11:43,440 I have been waiting patiently all day. 222 00:11:43,520 --> 00:11:44,800 I am flattered. 223 00:11:44,880 --> 00:11:46,240 Um, I'll make sure you're first 224 00:11:46,320 --> 00:11:47,360 in the queue tomorrow. 225 00:11:47,440 --> 00:11:49,280 Tomorrow?! 226 00:11:49,360 --> 00:11:51,360 Oh. Oh. 227 00:11:54,160 --> 00:11:56,600 Peggy! I can't believe my luck. 228 00:11:56,680 --> 00:11:58,640 Clem's favourite show is "The Ties that Bind." 229 00:11:58,720 --> 00:12:01,160 See! Problem solved. 230 00:12:01,240 --> 00:12:04,520 You really are an inspiration, Peggy Button. 231 00:12:04,600 --> 00:12:06,920 I am tickled to see how taken you are 232 00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:08,920 by our time-travelling friend. 233 00:12:09,000 --> 00:12:11,040 Roger and Barbara have gone AWOL. 234 00:12:11,120 --> 00:12:13,680 Which means I'm the most senior society member here. 235 00:12:13,760 --> 00:12:14,960 Me! 236 00:12:15,040 --> 00:12:16,520 Nothing you can't handle, Sister. 237 00:12:16,600 --> 00:12:18,040 This has been a joyous event. 238 00:12:18,120 --> 00:12:19,640 And I'm sure tomorrow will be even better. 239 00:12:28,200 --> 00:12:30,960 {\an8}## 240 00:12:31,040 --> 00:12:33,040 Mr Wiseman? 241 00:12:35,080 --> 00:12:36,400 Mr Wiseman? 242 00:12:36,480 --> 00:12:41,840 {\an8}## 243 00:12:41,920 --> 00:12:44,080 What on earth do you think you're doing?! 244 00:12:48,920 --> 00:12:50,440 what have we got here, then? 245 00:12:50,520 --> 00:12:52,960 Judging by the spatter and pooling, I surmise 246 00:12:53,040 --> 00:12:56,400 a serious attack took place in this very spot. 247 00:12:56,480 --> 00:12:59,800 Perhaps, Mr Wiseman left to seek medical attention? 248 00:12:59,880 --> 00:13:01,880 Quite possibly. 249 00:13:03,560 --> 00:13:05,560 What have we here? 250 00:13:09,520 --> 00:13:12,720 Inexplicably, a spot of green. 251 00:13:12,800 --> 00:13:14,880 Alien blood, perhaps? 252 00:13:14,960 --> 00:13:18,280 I'm sure there's a more rational explanation. 253 00:13:18,360 --> 00:13:19,800 Could this be our weapon? 254 00:13:19,880 --> 00:13:24,760 {\an8}## 255 00:13:24,840 --> 00:13:26,920 - Huh? - Hm? 256 00:13:28,960 --> 00:13:31,240 Well, that looks like blood. 257 00:13:33,680 --> 00:13:35,040 Bravo, Peggy! 258 00:13:35,120 --> 00:13:36,560 So, he was attacked with the implement 259 00:13:36,640 --> 00:13:38,400 of his very own words. 260 00:13:38,480 --> 00:13:40,680 Intriguing. A "Ties that Bind" script. 261 00:13:40,760 --> 00:13:42,000 Dated 2 days ago. 262 00:13:42,080 --> 00:13:43,440 Well, perhaps, Mr Wiseman 263 00:13:43,520 --> 00:13:44,920 wasn't happy with what he wrote? 264 00:13:45,000 --> 00:13:47,440 Or our attacker hated the show? 265 00:13:47,520 --> 00:13:49,200 Well, that narrows it down to almost everyone 266 00:13:49,280 --> 00:13:50,720 at the convention. 267 00:13:50,800 --> 00:13:52,560 I can't help but feel that the telegram 268 00:13:52,640 --> 00:13:54,960 he received there yesterday was most significant. 269 00:13:55,040 --> 00:13:57,000 Sister. Sir. 270 00:13:57,080 --> 00:13:58,560 Over here. 271 00:13:58,640 --> 00:14:02,920 {\an8}## 272 00:14:05,480 --> 00:14:07,240 More blood. 273 00:14:07,320 --> 00:14:10,920 So, perhaps, the body was removed to conceal evidence. 274 00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:13,400 We need to find him. 275 00:14:13,480 --> 00:14:15,480 Norman. 276 00:14:17,800 --> 00:14:19,080 Film, now. 277 00:14:19,160 --> 00:14:21,160 Of course, Inspector. 278 00:14:21,240 --> 00:14:24,000 It's just -- I need this scoop to save my job. 279 00:14:24,080 --> 00:14:25,400 I know whodunit, you see. 280 00:14:25,480 --> 00:14:26,960 Cough it up, then. 281 00:14:27,040 --> 00:14:29,440 What's it Ruth Penny says, quid pro quo? 282 00:14:29,520 --> 00:14:31,920 That all depends on how valuable the information is... 283 00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:36,760 {\an8}## 284 00:14:42,440 --> 00:14:44,920 Regulation 18B -- 285 00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:47,600 Lower-ranked members must ensure 286 00:14:47,680 --> 00:14:51,360 that all society spaces are cleaned 287 00:14:51,440 --> 00:14:54,320 before the President's arrival. 288 00:14:54,400 --> 00:14:57,120 - Sorry, Mr Crabtree. - We'll be as quick as we can. 289 00:15:00,080 --> 00:15:02,080 Ah, Mr Fabricant. 290 00:15:02,160 --> 00:15:06,080 Ah, not feeling too tickety-boo. 291 00:15:06,160 --> 00:15:09,040 It's food poisoning, I expect. 292 00:15:09,120 --> 00:15:11,120 - I'll get you some coffee. - Coffee. 293 00:15:15,360 --> 00:15:17,320 He smells like he's swallowed a brewery. 294 00:15:17,400 --> 00:15:18,800 Mm-hm. 295 00:15:18,880 --> 00:15:20,960 Uh, no, no, no, no. Too soon. Chop chop. 296 00:15:21,040 --> 00:15:22,720 We are here on police business. 297 00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:25,120 We believe that Douglas Wiseman was attacked last night. 298 00:15:25,200 --> 00:15:27,200 - Is he alright? - He's currently missing. 299 00:15:27,280 --> 00:15:28,920 Oh, my goodness. 300 00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:31,560 And my Zybok's nowhere to be seen. 301 00:15:31,640 --> 00:15:33,960 Well, I'd rather prioritise humans for now. 302 00:15:34,040 --> 00:15:36,040 - Hm. - Roger, can we have a word? 303 00:15:37,040 --> 00:15:39,040 If you insist. 304 00:15:40,520 --> 00:15:42,280 We heard from Norman Whalley 305 00:15:42,360 --> 00:15:45,520 that you'd threatened Mr Wiseman yesterday after the panel. 306 00:15:45,600 --> 00:15:47,760 Uh, I wouldn't say that. 307 00:15:47,840 --> 00:15:49,720 But you've only just started! 308 00:15:49,800 --> 00:15:52,280 I can not stomach so many tragic individuals. 309 00:15:52,360 --> 00:15:54,080 Tragic?! 310 00:15:54,160 --> 00:15:56,720 Tragic is turning your back on the programme that made you. 311 00:15:56,800 --> 00:15:59,520 And then, writing something so bland. 312 00:15:59,600 --> 00:16:00,960 How dare you! 313 00:16:01,040 --> 00:16:03,320 You! Of all people! 314 00:16:03,400 --> 00:16:04,840 "President Crabtree"?! 315 00:16:04,920 --> 00:16:06,840 I'll see to it that no one associated 316 00:16:06,920 --> 00:16:09,040 with the show speaks to you ever again. 317 00:16:09,120 --> 00:16:12,960 - No. No, I'm sorry. I-I -- - Your sad little reign is over! 318 00:16:14,800 --> 00:16:17,040 I won't let you do this! 319 00:16:17,120 --> 00:16:19,120 I'm warning you! 320 00:16:21,080 --> 00:16:24,080 It was just a storm in a teacup. 321 00:16:24,160 --> 00:16:26,240 Really, because, uh, 322 00:16:26,320 --> 00:16:28,440 I remember you went AWOL yesterday. 323 00:16:28,520 --> 00:16:30,560 A migraine, Inspector. 324 00:16:30,640 --> 00:16:33,160 All the excitement, you see? 325 00:16:33,240 --> 00:16:35,120 We'd like to search your house. 326 00:16:35,200 --> 00:16:37,040 What on earth for? 327 00:16:37,120 --> 00:16:39,760 To eliminate you from our enquiries. 328 00:16:39,840 --> 00:16:41,240 Unless you have something to hide? 329 00:16:41,320 --> 00:16:43,080 Fine! 330 00:16:43,160 --> 00:16:47,840 But I refuse to leave this convention, so... 331 00:16:47,920 --> 00:16:49,200 help yourself. 332 00:16:49,280 --> 00:16:54,120 {\an8}## 333 00:16:54,200 --> 00:16:56,280 Sam: As much as I hate to agree with Norman, 334 00:16:56,360 --> 00:16:58,720 I'd say he was our prime suspect. 335 00:16:58,800 --> 00:17:01,120 Could he be responsible for our crumpled-up script? 336 00:17:01,200 --> 00:17:03,840 We found nothing of concern at Roger Crabtree's house. 337 00:17:03,920 --> 00:17:07,080 Apart from a wardrobe full of Celeste Carmichael's costumes. 338 00:17:07,160 --> 00:17:08,880 Any luck with the typewriter, Sister? 339 00:17:08,960 --> 00:17:11,120 Uh, henceforth known as Tippy Tappy. 340 00:17:11,200 --> 00:17:14,720 Well, I've discovered some kind of adhesive on his keys. 341 00:17:14,800 --> 00:17:16,000 But for what? 342 00:17:16,080 --> 00:17:17,720 What about the "alien blood"? 343 00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:19,640 Well, presently unidentified. 344 00:17:19,720 --> 00:17:21,560 Though, it does contain a high salt content. 345 00:17:21,640 --> 00:17:23,240 There could be something in this. 346 00:17:23,320 --> 00:17:24,960 A word with Celeste, I think. 347 00:17:25,040 --> 00:17:26,840 Any excuse to go back there. 348 00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:28,480 Could she be our killer, sir? 349 00:17:28,560 --> 00:17:30,000 Oh, well, mercifully, there's no evidence 350 00:17:30,080 --> 00:17:32,000 that Mr Wiseman is deceased. 351 00:17:32,080 --> 00:17:34,000 I think the writing's on the wall, Sister. 352 00:17:34,080 --> 00:17:35,560 Sergeant? 353 00:17:35,640 --> 00:17:43,960 {\an8}## 354 00:17:46,520 --> 00:17:51,960 {\an8}## 355 00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:54,200 {\an8}## 356 00:17:54,280 --> 00:17:56,280 Hello? 357 00:17:58,520 --> 00:18:01,080 Who's there? 358 00:18:01,160 --> 00:18:03,480 Show yourself! 359 00:18:05,880 --> 00:18:08,840 {\an8}## 360 00:18:08,920 --> 00:18:10,960 Who -- Who are you? 361 00:18:11,040 --> 00:18:13,800 A Zybok from the planet Zandrel. 362 00:18:13,880 --> 00:18:17,320 Very amusing. Let me go, this instant. 363 00:18:17,400 --> 00:18:21,160 Negative. You have a task to complete. 364 00:18:21,240 --> 00:18:23,040 What task?! 365 00:18:30,040 --> 00:18:31,080 Mr Fabricant. 366 00:18:31,160 --> 00:18:33,640 Zyboks! Venarians. 367 00:18:33,720 --> 00:18:35,720 Mechanomen. 368 00:18:36,760 --> 00:18:38,920 I'm so sorry, Sir, um... 369 00:18:39,000 --> 00:18:42,160 I just wanted to know, where is Celeste? 370 00:18:42,240 --> 00:18:46,520 Can't a man just have a damn nap?! 371 00:18:55,240 --> 00:18:57,000 I heard you were looking for me? 372 00:18:57,080 --> 00:18:59,440 Did you do this, Miss Carmichael? 373 00:19:01,360 --> 00:19:03,120 So what if I did? 374 00:19:03,200 --> 00:19:06,400 Why was Douglas Wiseman torturing your character? 375 00:19:06,480 --> 00:19:09,560 I suspect it's because I said, "No." 376 00:19:11,640 --> 00:19:14,440 To his advances. 377 00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:18,600 You said yesterday that the mistreatment had stopped. 378 00:19:18,680 --> 00:19:22,680 So, when you read this script, you must have felt angry? 379 00:19:22,760 --> 00:19:24,440 Angry?! 380 00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:26,640 - I was livid. - I'm an artist. 381 00:19:26,720 --> 00:19:28,240 I must follow where the muse takes me. 382 00:19:28,320 --> 00:19:30,040 You lied to me! 383 00:19:30,120 --> 00:19:32,080 You lied to me, so, that I would go to the awards with you! 384 00:19:32,160 --> 00:19:34,240 Well, I am not going. 385 00:19:34,320 --> 00:19:37,920 And I am not doing this! 386 00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:40,080 You really haven't grasped the dynamic here, 387 00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:41,480 have you, sweetheart? 388 00:19:41,560 --> 00:19:43,000 I'm the puppeteer. 389 00:19:43,080 --> 00:19:44,680 You are my puppet. 390 00:19:44,760 --> 00:19:46,200 Not if I quit. 391 00:19:46,280 --> 00:19:48,280 Oh, really? Oh. Go on then. 392 00:19:49,600 --> 00:19:51,600 No. Go on. Quit. 393 00:19:53,880 --> 00:19:55,880 Thought not. 394 00:19:58,320 --> 00:20:01,160 Why didn't you quit? 395 00:20:01,240 --> 00:20:04,240 Douglas says he's the only one who'll hire me. 396 00:20:04,320 --> 00:20:06,000 And you believed him? 397 00:20:06,080 --> 00:20:09,400 I think, you're a -- a sensational actress. 398 00:20:09,480 --> 00:20:12,480 That's very kind of you to say so. 399 00:20:12,560 --> 00:20:15,720 But without Douglas, my career is over. 400 00:20:15,800 --> 00:20:20,160 So, you see, I could never hurt him. 401 00:20:20,240 --> 00:20:24,360 {\an8}## 402 00:20:27,360 --> 00:20:29,160 Sir, look what's just 403 00:20:29,240 --> 00:20:31,240 been delivered to the station. 404 00:20:35,120 --> 00:20:37,720 "Great Slaughter Police, Hear on the grapevine 405 00:20:37,800 --> 00:20:39,840 that you have been looking for me. 406 00:20:39,920 --> 00:20:41,760 Early this morning I received details 407 00:20:41,840 --> 00:20:43,840 of an urgent family matter. 408 00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:45,840 Leave me alone and afford me the privacy 409 00:20:45,920 --> 00:20:47,880 I need at this difficult time. 410 00:20:47,960 --> 00:20:50,400 {\an8}Yours, Douglas Wiseman." 411 00:20:50,480 --> 00:20:51,920 {\an8}Sounds a bit fishy to me. 412 00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:54,000 And it doesn't explain the blood. 413 00:20:55,800 --> 00:20:57,720 Though, I believe it is his handwriting. 414 00:20:57,800 --> 00:20:59,600 He's alive? 415 00:20:59,680 --> 00:21:02,280 I believe so, for now. 416 00:21:02,360 --> 00:21:05,040 Consider the letters on the left hand side. 417 00:21:06,800 --> 00:21:10,480 This is quite literally... 418 00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:11,920 a cry for help. 419 00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:13,840 We'd better find him as soon as we can. 420 00:21:13,920 --> 00:21:15,800 What about your Tippy Tappy, Sister? 421 00:21:15,880 --> 00:21:19,200 Well, I'm still somewhat stuck on our sticky substance. 422 00:21:19,280 --> 00:21:20,880 However, I have found more 423 00:21:20,960 --> 00:21:22,800 "alien blood" in between his keys, 424 00:21:22,880 --> 00:21:25,440 the origin of which continues to elude me. 425 00:21:25,520 --> 00:21:28,400 - Any fingerprints? - Good question, Peggy. 426 00:21:28,480 --> 00:21:30,960 Well, the hotel door handle was most illuminating. 427 00:21:31,040 --> 00:21:34,160 So, I recalled that someone else went missing yesterday. 428 00:21:34,240 --> 00:21:35,280 I took a punt 429 00:21:35,360 --> 00:21:37,160 and found the very same prints 430 00:21:37,240 --> 00:21:38,680 on this. 431 00:21:38,760 --> 00:21:40,960 Whose? 432 00:21:41,040 --> 00:21:43,320 I'm so sorry. I have no idea. 433 00:21:43,400 --> 00:21:44,880 He is our star guest! 434 00:21:44,960 --> 00:21:46,920 We have to sober him up before his panel. 435 00:21:47,000 --> 00:21:48,560 Don't worry, I'll go find him. 436 00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:51,840 Apologies, Miss Pierce, but that won't be possible. 437 00:21:51,920 --> 00:21:53,240 You've found my Zybok? 438 00:21:53,320 --> 00:21:54,440 Sam: I'm afraid not. 439 00:21:54,520 --> 00:21:56,320 But we would like a word. 440 00:21:56,400 --> 00:21:58,040 Preferably, at your home. 441 00:21:58,120 --> 00:22:05,480 {\an8}## 442 00:22:05,560 --> 00:22:07,240 Oh, no. Not you. 443 00:22:07,320 --> 00:22:09,760 I gave you a lead in good faith. 444 00:22:09,840 --> 00:22:11,200 - Can't I at least come in? - No. 445 00:22:11,280 --> 00:22:13,040 And if you print one word. 446 00:22:13,120 --> 00:22:15,920 Actually, there's something I think Norman might want to see. 447 00:22:25,280 --> 00:22:28,160 Zoiks! 448 00:22:28,240 --> 00:22:32,200 - I don't believe it. - Neither do I. 449 00:22:32,280 --> 00:22:35,360 It looks like we're all going on an adventure. 450 00:22:37,040 --> 00:22:39,720 - But how did you? - We rescued parts of scenery 451 00:22:39,800 --> 00:22:43,120 from a skip after the show ended. 452 00:22:43,200 --> 00:22:46,000 It's been a labour of love for Roger and I. 453 00:22:46,080 --> 00:22:47,920 Does it work? May I? 454 00:22:48,000 --> 00:22:50,680 Of course. Everything's wired in. 455 00:22:50,760 --> 00:22:53,000 Next stop, the planet Zandrel. 456 00:22:53,080 --> 00:22:56,280 Five million years ago! 457 00:22:56,360 --> 00:22:59,360 What are you waiting for? 458 00:23:03,400 --> 00:23:07,320 Wait, if I'm The Professor, does that make you Charlie? 459 00:23:07,400 --> 00:23:08,880 That's enough of that. 460 00:23:08,960 --> 00:23:10,600 Felix, we shall start the search? 461 00:23:10,680 --> 00:23:12,320 Button, if you'll show Norman out, please? 462 00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:15,600 {\an8}## 463 00:23:18,520 --> 00:23:22,120 So, Barbara may we ask why your fingerprints were 464 00:23:22,200 --> 00:23:25,560 on Douglas Wiseman's hotel door handle? 465 00:23:25,640 --> 00:23:28,000 Because I went to see him. 466 00:23:28,080 --> 00:23:31,160 To ask for what was mine. 467 00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:33,240 Mr Wiseman. 468 00:23:35,400 --> 00:23:37,240 I'm funding the whole thing myself. 469 00:23:37,320 --> 00:23:39,760 But it cost a lot more than I thought. 470 00:23:41,240 --> 00:23:43,600 So, um... 471 00:23:43,680 --> 00:23:45,320 You didn't even finish one panel. 472 00:23:45,400 --> 00:23:47,240 I was paid a fee to appear. 473 00:23:47,320 --> 00:23:49,880 And appear I did. 474 00:23:49,960 --> 00:23:51,960 But that's not fair. 475 00:23:53,200 --> 00:23:56,400 That money is all I have left of my parents. 476 00:23:56,480 --> 00:23:59,440 Spare me the sob story. 477 00:23:59,520 --> 00:24:01,120 You don't understand. 478 00:24:01,200 --> 00:24:03,240 - They -- - Oh, boohoo! 479 00:24:03,320 --> 00:24:04,600 Boohoo to you! 480 00:24:04,680 --> 00:24:06,240 Please, I just want my money back. 481 00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:07,960 - No, enough, great. - No, no, I won't leave. 482 00:24:08,040 --> 00:24:09,400 - I promise. - Talk to my agent. 483 00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:11,600 - No, please. Please! - E-Enough. 484 00:24:13,000 --> 00:24:15,480 What happened to your parents? 485 00:24:18,600 --> 00:24:24,560 Um, last year in the Highlands, they, um... 486 00:24:28,240 --> 00:24:32,040 They hit a deer and came off the road. 487 00:24:36,880 --> 00:24:39,120 They weren't found for days. 488 00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:41,200 I'm so sorry. 489 00:24:42,560 --> 00:24:45,000 We used to watch "Professor Y" together. 490 00:24:47,000 --> 00:24:49,200 And now, every night, I dream of The Professor 491 00:24:49,280 --> 00:24:51,480 taking me away on adventures and -- 492 00:24:51,560 --> 00:24:53,640 and then, back in time to save them. 493 00:24:56,200 --> 00:24:58,280 So, you see... 494 00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:03,880 I know it's silly. 495 00:25:05,120 --> 00:25:07,120 "Professor Y" saved me. 496 00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:12,240 Did you spend your inheritance on this event? 497 00:25:12,320 --> 00:25:14,800 Roger said we had to make the TV company see 498 00:25:14,880 --> 00:25:16,720 that there's still a demand. 499 00:25:16,800 --> 00:25:19,360 Perhaps, he shouldn't be so cavalier with your money. 500 00:25:19,440 --> 00:25:20,920 If you're quite finished prying, 501 00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:24,200 perhaps, I can have my lieutenant back? 502 00:25:24,280 --> 00:25:27,920 We found Kirk in the Spitfire, but there's still much to do. 503 00:25:29,680 --> 00:25:31,960 If you don't mind us remaining to search? 504 00:25:32,040 --> 00:25:35,880 - If you find my Zybok... - You'll be the first to know. 505 00:25:35,960 --> 00:25:37,280 Okay. 506 00:25:43,720 --> 00:25:45,200 I'm so thirsty. 507 00:25:51,200 --> 00:25:53,480 Just let me out of here, please. 508 00:25:54,960 --> 00:25:56,360 I'll do anything. 509 00:25:56,440 --> 00:25:58,360 You have been brought here for a purpose. 510 00:25:58,440 --> 00:26:00,760 What purpose?! 511 00:26:03,680 --> 00:26:07,240 OK, so, we searched the house from top to bottom. 512 00:26:07,320 --> 00:26:09,600 And it's another dead end. 513 00:26:09,680 --> 00:26:12,240 Oh, fishbums. Well, where on earth could he be? 514 00:26:12,320 --> 00:26:15,120 Anywhere in time or space it seems. 515 00:26:15,200 --> 00:26:17,680 Well, I have found a hair inside Tippy Tappy 516 00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:19,960 without scales or medulla, which means -- 517 00:26:20,040 --> 00:26:22,600 - The hair is synthetic. - Ooh, very good. 518 00:26:22,680 --> 00:26:25,240 Which along with the adhesive... 519 00:26:25,320 --> 00:26:28,040 Oh, no. Not again. 520 00:26:28,120 --> 00:26:30,320 We have to go where the evidence takes us. 521 00:26:30,400 --> 00:26:32,400 Come on, Sergeant. 522 00:26:36,040 --> 00:26:38,320 The moment we've all been waiting for. 523 00:26:38,400 --> 00:26:42,040 Our hero and a role model to us all. 524 00:26:42,120 --> 00:26:45,280 Professor Y himself -- 525 00:26:45,360 --> 00:26:47,240 Kirk Fabricant! 526 00:26:50,440 --> 00:26:52,560 Hey. 527 00:27:04,280 --> 00:27:06,280 Oh! 528 00:27:08,040 --> 00:27:09,320 Come on, then! 529 00:27:09,400 --> 00:27:11,800 What inane facts 530 00:27:11,880 --> 00:27:13,440 do you all want to know? 531 00:27:13,520 --> 00:27:16,640 Well, may we first start by asking what you've been up to 532 00:27:16,720 --> 00:27:19,120 - since the show ended? - Far too many things to mention. 533 00:27:19,200 --> 00:27:20,440 Yes, you. 534 00:27:20,520 --> 00:27:23,080 Can I finally have my autograph? 535 00:27:23,160 --> 00:27:25,640 Oh, it's you. 536 00:27:25,720 --> 00:27:28,920 Your breakfast has played havoc with my guts! 537 00:27:29,000 --> 00:27:31,160 How dare you! 538 00:27:31,240 --> 00:27:34,000 My food is highly acclaimed! 539 00:27:36,560 --> 00:27:37,960 You see. 540 00:27:38,040 --> 00:27:40,040 Ugh! 541 00:27:41,480 --> 00:27:43,720 Can we have a sensible question, please? 542 00:27:43,800 --> 00:27:46,440 Is it true atyowerrablottoarretme? 543 00:27:48,320 --> 00:27:50,080 Translation? 544 00:27:50,160 --> 00:27:51,560 Oh, is it true that you were 545 00:27:51,640 --> 00:27:53,680 inebriated during some of the recordings? 546 00:27:53,760 --> 00:27:57,040 Absolutely not! I am teetotal. Next. 547 00:27:57,120 --> 00:28:01,320 Do you wear a toupee, Mr Fabricant? 548 00:28:01,400 --> 00:28:03,160 - A what? - A hairpiece. 549 00:28:03,240 --> 00:28:05,320 A -- A wig if you will. 550 00:28:09,880 --> 00:28:12,280 A wig? Huh? 551 00:28:13,360 --> 00:28:15,760 A wig. 552 00:28:15,840 --> 00:28:17,840 Wig! 553 00:28:20,160 --> 00:28:23,360 Blasphemy! 554 00:28:23,440 --> 00:28:25,720 I came here for you. 555 00:28:25,800 --> 00:28:27,560 For the fans. 556 00:28:27,640 --> 00:28:33,440 When, really, your stupid little show has been the end of me. 557 00:28:36,680 --> 00:28:42,600 You all stole my wonderful, wonderful... 558 00:28:47,800 --> 00:28:49,600 Career. 559 00:28:56,120 --> 00:28:59,840 Sergeant Livingstone has done some background checks. 560 00:28:59,920 --> 00:29:03,160 Yes, um, it appears that you are indeed working, 561 00:29:03,240 --> 00:29:04,840 but as -- 562 00:29:04,920 --> 00:29:08,120 as a lollipop man in Skegness. 563 00:29:08,200 --> 00:29:12,120 Yes, I am a humongous failure. 564 00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:14,360 If that's what you want to hear? 565 00:29:14,440 --> 00:29:16,000 We just want to know what you were doing 566 00:29:16,080 --> 00:29:18,960 in Mr Wiseman's hotel room. 567 00:29:19,040 --> 00:29:21,240 If you must know... 568 00:29:21,320 --> 00:29:22,920 I went there to ask -- 569 00:29:23,000 --> 00:29:24,320 nay -- 570 00:29:24,400 --> 00:29:26,080 beg... 571 00:29:26,160 --> 00:29:28,400 for a part in "The Ties that Bind." 572 00:29:28,480 --> 00:29:30,840 So. What happened? 573 00:29:30,920 --> 00:29:35,960 That little toad laughed at me 574 00:29:36,040 --> 00:29:40,360 as he sat there composing his letter. 575 00:29:40,440 --> 00:29:41,880 - A letter? - And everything 576 00:29:41,960 --> 00:29:44,440 about my downfall 577 00:29:44,520 --> 00:29:46,480 became crystal clear. 578 00:29:46,560 --> 00:29:48,600 I-I know I'd be perfect for it. 579 00:29:48,680 --> 00:29:51,800 The -- The audience never stopped loving me. 580 00:29:51,880 --> 00:29:56,000 Why on earth would I let you ruin another show of mine? 581 00:29:56,080 --> 00:29:58,680 Ruin? 582 00:29:58,760 --> 00:30:02,160 Your lack of self awareness really is astounding. 583 00:30:02,240 --> 00:30:04,760 I -- You -- You've lost me. 584 00:30:04,840 --> 00:30:07,920 You're a dipso, a boozer, 585 00:30:08,000 --> 00:30:11,000 a wino, a drunk, an old soak. 586 00:30:11,080 --> 00:30:13,160 Capiche? 587 00:30:13,240 --> 00:30:16,840 I can assure you those days are behind me. 588 00:30:16,920 --> 00:30:20,360 You want to know the real reason you never worked again? 589 00:30:22,000 --> 00:30:25,560 I made it common knowledge in the industry. 590 00:30:25,640 --> 00:30:28,840 Hmm? You're a laughing stock. 591 00:30:31,800 --> 00:30:33,800 What? 592 00:30:34,520 --> 00:30:36,520 Ow! 593 00:30:38,200 --> 00:30:39,840 Now, get out of my suite! 594 00:30:39,920 --> 00:30:41,880 You bald waste of space. 595 00:30:41,960 --> 00:30:47,880 {\an8}## 596 00:30:47,960 --> 00:30:49,440 Is that when you bashed him over the head 597 00:30:49,520 --> 00:30:51,560 - with his typewriter? - I should have! 598 00:30:51,640 --> 00:30:53,280 Thanks to him, 599 00:30:53,360 --> 00:30:57,800 I can't even get a job as one of the uglies in panto. 600 00:30:57,880 --> 00:30:59,680 I doubt that. 601 00:30:59,760 --> 00:31:02,280 You were an icon. 602 00:31:02,360 --> 00:31:03,880 That is true. 603 00:31:03,960 --> 00:31:07,160 But what with the stress of it all... 604 00:31:07,240 --> 00:31:11,240 I sniffed the barmaid's apron. 605 00:31:11,320 --> 00:31:14,840 And now, I am... 606 00:31:14,920 --> 00:31:17,240 a pathetic old has been. 607 00:31:19,960 --> 00:31:21,640 Perhaps, if you stop drinking, 608 00:31:21,720 --> 00:31:24,000 you could revive your career. 609 00:31:24,080 --> 00:31:26,080 It's hopeless. Look at me. 610 00:31:26,160 --> 00:31:27,720 Do you really want to let your fans 611 00:31:27,800 --> 00:31:29,920 see their hero like this? 612 00:31:30,000 --> 00:31:31,640 They look up to you. 613 00:31:31,720 --> 00:31:33,720 I looked up to you. 614 00:31:35,640 --> 00:31:37,640 You did? 615 00:31:41,600 --> 00:31:43,600 What would The Professor do? 616 00:31:46,760 --> 00:31:49,200 Are you having fun, Mrs Clam? 617 00:31:49,280 --> 00:31:52,240 The answer is a decided no. 618 00:31:52,320 --> 00:31:53,600 But I was promised an autograph, 619 00:31:53,680 --> 00:31:55,680 and I refuse to leave without it! 620 00:31:57,000 --> 00:31:58,760 Lights. 621 00:31:58,840 --> 00:32:00,840 Sorry. 622 00:32:02,880 --> 00:32:05,680 It's all over Peggy, in T-minus 17 hours, 623 00:32:05,760 --> 00:32:07,200 I'm going to be toast. 624 00:32:07,280 --> 00:32:10,160 I'm sure you'll come up with something. 625 00:32:10,240 --> 00:32:14,920 Now, it's time to enjoy my greatest achievement yet. 626 00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:19,280 Never before seen footage of "Attack of the Zyboks"! 627 00:32:19,360 --> 00:32:22,760 - Oh for heaven's sake. - Sister Peter. 628 00:32:22,840 --> 00:32:24,520 Tom, if you will? 629 00:32:32,680 --> 00:32:37,880 {\an8}## 630 00:32:37,960 --> 00:32:39,760 {\an8}## 631 00:32:39,840 --> 00:32:41,960 We'll never outrun the Zyboks! 632 00:32:44,280 --> 00:32:46,440 Unless -- Unless , I can 633 00:32:46,520 --> 00:32:49,880 recharge the transducer, deep in the heart of the DARTIX. 634 00:32:49,960 --> 00:32:52,120 But how will we even get there, Professor? 635 00:32:52,200 --> 00:32:53,760 Let me think, let me think. 636 00:33:04,280 --> 00:33:05,400 I'm not going down there. 637 00:33:05,480 --> 00:33:07,160 Poppycock. 638 00:33:07,240 --> 00:33:10,440 Come with me, kid, we're going on an adventure. 639 00:33:11,720 --> 00:33:13,920 Do you even know where we're going, Professor?! 640 00:33:14,000 --> 00:33:17,720 Well, truthfully, my dear, I haven't a fig ! 641 00:33:17,800 --> 00:33:19,480 But isn't this fun? 642 00:33:19,560 --> 00:33:22,320 Zybok: We have The Professor in our sights! 643 00:33:22,400 --> 00:33:24,240 He can not escape. 644 00:33:24,320 --> 00:33:27,440 The mighty Zyboks will be victorious! 645 00:33:27,520 --> 00:33:29,040 So, Douglas was typing a letter? 646 00:33:29,120 --> 00:33:31,320 That's what Kirk said, before his sticky wig 647 00:33:31,400 --> 00:33:32,680 fell on Tippy Tappy. 648 00:33:32,760 --> 00:33:35,040 Then, Tippy's carbon ribbon 649 00:33:35,120 --> 00:33:38,120 could be exceedingly illuminating. 650 00:33:38,200 --> 00:33:40,160 Oh, as you might say, Sister, "Fishbums!" 651 00:33:40,240 --> 00:33:42,200 I'm missing the screening. 652 00:33:42,280 --> 00:33:43,840 - I'm sure you'll survive. - Sam: 653 00:33:46,280 --> 00:33:49,960 - "Kill Professor Y"? - Huh? 654 00:33:50,040 --> 00:33:51,800 Did Douglas want to kill Kirk? 655 00:33:51,880 --> 00:33:53,160 Thankfully not. 656 00:33:53,240 --> 00:33:54,560 It's to his literary agent. 657 00:33:54,640 --> 00:33:56,040 The show is being revived. 658 00:33:56,120 --> 00:33:57,280 The show's coming back?! 659 00:33:57,360 --> 00:33:58,880 Apparently so. 660 00:33:58,960 --> 00:34:01,440 But Douglas intended to block it. 661 00:34:01,520 --> 00:34:02,920 Well, something our attacker clearly 662 00:34:03,000 --> 00:34:04,480 wouldn't allow to happen. 663 00:34:04,560 --> 00:34:06,200 Sister. 664 00:34:06,280 --> 00:34:09,040 Have you made any progress with this green substance? 665 00:34:09,120 --> 00:34:11,400 Well, thin layer chromatography has revealed 666 00:34:11,480 --> 00:34:14,200 the presence of amino acids, but that's about it, I'm afraid. 667 00:34:14,280 --> 00:34:17,880 If only we had the help of a time-travelling professor. 668 00:34:17,960 --> 00:34:19,520 If only we had the help 669 00:34:19,600 --> 00:34:22,520 of a time-travelling professor. 670 00:34:24,080 --> 00:34:26,960 - Oh, my giddy aunt. - Welcome aboard, Sister. 671 00:34:27,040 --> 00:34:29,240 An unexpected pleasure. 672 00:34:29,320 --> 00:34:30,400 How may we? 673 00:34:30,480 --> 00:34:31,720 Uh, I need your help. 674 00:34:31,800 --> 00:34:33,080 Um, perhaps, your equipment? 675 00:34:33,160 --> 00:34:34,600 No need for that. 676 00:34:34,680 --> 00:34:37,000 Logic is all that is required, hmm? 677 00:34:37,080 --> 00:34:39,040 What would one of my fans do 678 00:34:39,120 --> 00:34:42,760 if they thought my show had been cancelled... 679 00:34:42,840 --> 00:34:44,320 again? 680 00:34:44,400 --> 00:34:45,920 Oh. Of course. 681 00:34:46,000 --> 00:34:48,640 An emotive reaction. 682 00:34:48,720 --> 00:34:52,040 - Oh, no, not again. - Eliminate the forensic nun! 683 00:34:52,120 --> 00:34:54,200 You know, I've always wondered what's inside one of those. 684 00:34:54,280 --> 00:34:55,880 Eliminate! 685 00:34:55,960 --> 00:34:57,520 - Bingo. - Sister? 686 00:34:57,600 --> 00:34:59,960 Eliminate the forensic nun! 687 00:35:02,960 --> 00:35:05,280 - Hey! Sister? - I know what it is. 688 00:35:05,360 --> 00:35:07,280 The missing Zybok is most significant. 689 00:35:07,360 --> 00:35:08,640 We must hurry! 690 00:35:08,720 --> 00:35:10,720 Where? 691 00:35:12,800 --> 00:35:14,280 It's just a hunch. 692 00:35:14,360 --> 00:35:16,480 It might be a really silly one. 693 00:35:16,560 --> 00:35:18,880 But please indulge me. 694 00:35:18,960 --> 00:35:25,640 {\an8}## 695 00:35:25,720 --> 00:35:28,160 - Norman, I really don't think -- - This is it. 696 00:35:29,560 --> 00:35:31,280 This is my scoop. 697 00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:44,080 I'm a nincompoop. 698 00:35:44,160 --> 00:35:46,600 Who can't even get a nincomscoop. 699 00:35:46,680 --> 00:35:48,520 I deserve to lose this job. 700 00:35:48,600 --> 00:35:51,560 No. No, that's not true. 701 00:35:51,640 --> 00:35:54,720 Even if you do, what's to stop you moving on to better things? 702 00:35:54,800 --> 00:35:57,360 In London, like Ruth? 703 00:35:57,440 --> 00:35:59,920 But how can I ever leave when... 704 00:36:02,040 --> 00:36:05,160 Do you want to go dinner with me? 705 00:36:05,240 --> 00:36:07,880 Oh, uh... 706 00:36:07,960 --> 00:36:09,560 If you get your scoop. 707 00:36:09,640 --> 00:36:11,400 To celebrate. 708 00:36:11,480 --> 00:36:14,480 Uh, we should go. You're missing the screening. 709 00:36:16,560 --> 00:36:18,680 Wherever you go... 710 00:36:18,760 --> 00:36:20,560 I shall follow. 711 00:36:24,840 --> 00:36:26,440 Just one more thing. 712 00:36:26,520 --> 00:36:32,280 {\an8}## 713 00:36:32,360 --> 00:36:36,080 {\an8}## 714 00:36:39,160 --> 00:36:41,280 Is this really happening? 715 00:36:43,280 --> 00:36:45,680 Zybok: Then, you need to go faster. 716 00:36:45,760 --> 00:36:48,720 Think of my award. Please. 717 00:36:48,800 --> 00:36:51,520 When your mission is complete you will be released! 718 00:36:51,600 --> 00:36:52,720 - Norman: It's over! - Zybok: Freeze! 719 00:36:52,800 --> 00:36:54,320 You helped build the console, 720 00:36:54,400 --> 00:36:56,040 and you know about the key, don't you, Roger? 721 00:36:56,120 --> 00:36:57,800 Thank God! Where have you been?! 722 00:36:57,880 --> 00:36:59,840 El-im-in-ate! 723 00:36:59,920 --> 00:37:01,440 Get away from her! You! 724 00:37:01,520 --> 00:37:03,720 - You metal monstrosity! - Eliminate! 725 00:37:03,800 --> 00:37:06,080 - Button, are you alright? - I'll be fine, Sir. 726 00:37:06,160 --> 00:37:08,400 It's Roger, he's deranged! 727 00:37:08,480 --> 00:37:09,920 That may be so, Norman. 728 00:37:10,000 --> 00:37:12,760 But this is Barbara's house and her Zybok. 729 00:37:12,840 --> 00:37:15,160 Presumably, you don't want the creator of your beloved show 730 00:37:15,240 --> 00:37:16,920 to know what you've done? 731 00:37:17,000 --> 00:37:18,720 Eliminate! 732 00:37:18,800 --> 00:37:22,800 {\an8}## 733 00:37:22,880 --> 00:37:24,680 I didn't mean to hurt anyone. 734 00:37:24,760 --> 00:37:26,160 You?! 735 00:37:26,240 --> 00:37:27,960 I presume the telegram that you received 736 00:37:28,040 --> 00:37:30,040 informed you that the show was coming back? 737 00:37:31,520 --> 00:37:33,320 I couldn't believe it. 738 00:37:33,400 --> 00:37:35,520 - I had to pull the plug. - Why? 739 00:37:35,600 --> 00:37:37,760 "Professor Y" is an embarrassment! 740 00:37:37,840 --> 00:37:39,160 It needs to be forgotten. 741 00:37:39,240 --> 00:37:40,840 So... 742 00:37:40,920 --> 00:37:42,560 So, I -- I wrote a letter. 743 00:37:42,640 --> 00:37:45,560 Which we assume you read, Barbara. 744 00:37:45,640 --> 00:37:48,720 I only glimpsed it at first. 745 00:37:48,800 --> 00:37:50,840 So, I managed to get back in. 746 00:37:50,920 --> 00:37:53,440 I had to see what it said. 747 00:37:53,520 --> 00:37:56,440 Sister Boniface: And it elicited numerous tears... 748 00:37:56,520 --> 00:37:58,800 containing traces of your green mascara. 749 00:38:02,280 --> 00:38:04,280 Why kidnap Douglas? 750 00:38:05,960 --> 00:38:07,560 Sister Boniface: I imagine not only did Barbara 751 00:38:07,640 --> 00:38:11,120 want to save the show she loved... 752 00:38:11,200 --> 00:38:13,160 but she wanted its original creator to breathe 753 00:38:13,240 --> 00:38:14,840 life back into it. 754 00:38:18,520 --> 00:38:20,120 He's the only one who can. 755 00:38:20,200 --> 00:38:24,520 I will never write this pathetic little show ever again! 756 00:38:24,600 --> 00:38:27,920 No! You're ruining the only thing that keeps me going! 757 00:38:28,000 --> 00:38:30,800 - Then, you need to grow up! - Barbara's parents. 758 00:38:30,880 --> 00:38:33,480 They both passed away. 759 00:38:33,560 --> 00:38:34,920 Tragically. 760 00:38:35,000 --> 00:38:37,200 Your pathetic little show saved her. 761 00:38:39,000 --> 00:38:41,360 I just miss them so much. 762 00:38:46,960 --> 00:38:51,640 Right. Well. I'm -- I am terribly sorry to hear that. 763 00:38:52,640 --> 00:38:54,680 But could someone please help get me free? 764 00:38:54,760 --> 00:38:58,680 If I leave now, I may just make it in time for my award. 765 00:39:01,880 --> 00:39:03,320 No? 766 00:39:03,400 --> 00:39:05,440 You are one of the finest actresses 767 00:39:05,520 --> 00:39:07,280 I have ever worked with. 768 00:39:07,360 --> 00:39:09,320 Douglas is lucky to have you. 769 00:39:09,400 --> 00:39:10,360 Always has been. 770 00:39:10,440 --> 00:39:13,200 Thank you, Professor. 771 00:39:13,280 --> 00:39:15,960 And now, I need you to be brave for me. 772 00:39:16,040 --> 00:39:19,000 - And admit something. - I'm -- I'm not... 773 00:39:22,920 --> 00:39:25,920 I... 774 00:39:26,000 --> 00:39:29,000 Am... 775 00:39:29,080 --> 00:39:32,600 Something, beginning with "A." 776 00:39:32,680 --> 00:39:34,080 I've never said that before. 777 00:39:34,160 --> 00:39:36,440 The important first step. 778 00:39:36,520 --> 00:39:38,680 Now, you get better, for me. 779 00:39:38,760 --> 00:39:40,720 Yes? 780 00:39:40,800 --> 00:39:43,440 Douglas is alive! 781 00:39:43,520 --> 00:39:45,800 Celeste. No. 782 00:39:45,880 --> 00:39:47,480 Celeste. 783 00:39:47,560 --> 00:39:50,040 I can only apologise. 784 00:39:50,120 --> 00:39:52,240 I'll write you a new script. 785 00:39:52,320 --> 00:39:54,440 Hmm? 786 00:39:54,520 --> 00:39:56,280 The car's waiting outside. 787 00:39:56,360 --> 00:39:57,840 I'm not coming. 788 00:39:57,920 --> 00:40:00,520 And when our contract expires, 789 00:40:00,600 --> 00:40:01,880 we're done. 790 00:40:01,960 --> 00:40:03,400 But... 791 00:40:03,480 --> 00:40:06,120 - I'm the only one who -- - There you go, again. 792 00:40:06,200 --> 00:40:08,520 Trying to manipulate me, so that I won't leave you. 793 00:40:08,600 --> 00:40:12,720 Dear boy, why don't you forget the awards and stay? 794 00:40:14,200 --> 00:40:16,680 "Professor Y" is not something to be ashamed of. 795 00:40:16,760 --> 00:40:19,800 I mean, look at the creativity and community here. 796 00:40:19,880 --> 00:40:23,080 You created something magical. 797 00:40:23,160 --> 00:40:26,240 And in my experience, that does not happen very often. 798 00:40:26,320 --> 00:40:30,520 {\an8}## 799 00:40:30,600 --> 00:40:33,840 I get it now, alright? 800 00:40:33,920 --> 00:40:36,560 A loopy fan locked me up for it. 801 00:40:36,640 --> 00:40:39,200 I can see how much it means to all of you 802 00:40:39,280 --> 00:40:41,280 little people. 803 00:40:41,360 --> 00:40:43,360 If you don't want a have real life, 804 00:40:43,440 --> 00:40:44,760 then, who am I to stop you? 805 00:40:44,840 --> 00:40:46,120 So... 806 00:40:46,200 --> 00:40:47,880 you get your wish, 807 00:40:47,960 --> 00:40:51,840 albeit without my considerable talent. 808 00:40:51,920 --> 00:40:54,760 "Professor Y" will live on to have more adventures. 809 00:40:59,040 --> 00:41:01,040 I can still make this. 810 00:41:04,760 --> 00:41:06,840 Enjoy, enjoy. 811 00:41:11,560 --> 00:41:14,160 Start her up! My award awaits! 812 00:41:14,240 --> 00:41:17,280 Change of plan, old chap. You're now my plus one. 813 00:41:18,800 --> 00:41:21,000 - Thank you, Mr Fabricant. - You're welcome. 814 00:41:21,080 --> 00:41:24,240 I do wonder if Mr Wiseman will ever get his life's ambition. 815 00:41:24,320 --> 00:41:26,680 Oh, no, he won't. 816 00:41:26,760 --> 00:41:29,800 My old pal Bertie is on the panel. 817 00:41:29,880 --> 00:41:32,240 What's that German word again? 818 00:41:32,320 --> 00:41:34,440 - Schadenfreude? - Well, he's not all bad. 819 00:41:34,520 --> 00:41:36,520 He did drop the charges against Barbara. 820 00:41:36,600 --> 00:41:38,080 Oh, well, that is a relief. 821 00:41:38,160 --> 00:41:39,960 And, uh, will you both be returning 822 00:41:40,040 --> 00:41:42,240 to space and time imminently? 823 00:41:42,320 --> 00:41:44,560 Fancy some more adventures? 824 00:41:44,640 --> 00:41:46,280 There's nothing I'd like more. 825 00:41:46,360 --> 00:41:47,960 Mr Fabricant! 826 00:41:48,040 --> 00:41:51,360 I cannot thank you enough for your patience. 827 00:41:51,440 --> 00:41:54,000 But most of all, your hospitality. 828 00:41:54,080 --> 00:41:55,400 Vera. 829 00:41:57,640 --> 00:42:00,400 Ooh, I... 830 00:42:00,480 --> 00:42:03,800 I suppose this will suffice. 831 00:42:03,880 --> 00:42:06,360 But really what you said about my food. 832 00:42:06,440 --> 00:42:07,840 I was delirious. 833 00:42:07,920 --> 00:42:10,280 Nothing could be further from the truth. 834 00:42:10,360 --> 00:42:11,840 Well, in that case, 835 00:42:11,920 --> 00:42:13,560 I'll expect you all at the Seaview 836 00:42:13,640 --> 00:42:16,280 in an hour for tripe and onions. 837 00:42:19,040 --> 00:42:22,600 Well, I did it. saved the show! 838 00:42:22,680 --> 00:42:25,880 You all owe me a great debt of gratitude. 839 00:42:25,960 --> 00:42:29,760 Yes. This will be the first of many conventions. 840 00:42:29,840 --> 00:42:31,640 For us, perhaps. 841 00:42:31,720 --> 00:42:33,360 But we'd rather deal with someone more 842 00:42:33,440 --> 00:42:36,080 in keeping with the values of our show. 843 00:42:36,160 --> 00:42:38,120 Who better than a nun? 844 00:42:38,200 --> 00:42:43,000 Sister Peter, I hereby promote you to President 845 00:42:43,080 --> 00:42:47,360 of the "Professor Y" Appreciation Society. 846 00:42:47,440 --> 00:42:49,280 I'm so honoured! 847 00:42:49,360 --> 00:42:51,720 What?! No one can dethrone me! 848 00:42:51,800 --> 00:42:53,880 I will always be the President. 849 00:42:56,800 --> 00:42:58,640 Turns out I got my scoop after all. 850 00:42:58,720 --> 00:43:01,000 Kirk's agreed to do an interview about the show coming back. 851 00:43:01,080 --> 00:43:02,480 Oh, well done. 852 00:43:02,560 --> 00:43:04,480 See, I knew you could do it. 853 00:43:04,560 --> 00:43:08,120 So, uh, about that dinner you promised me. 854 00:43:08,200 --> 00:43:10,000 No time like the present? 855 00:43:10,080 --> 00:43:12,760 Oh, yeah. 856 00:43:12,840 --> 00:43:14,480 I-I suppose we should... 857 00:43:14,560 --> 00:43:16,400 get it out of the way. 858 00:43:16,480 --> 00:43:18,640 But the more the merrier, eh? 859 00:43:18,720 --> 00:43:20,880 Mrs Clam will have our guts for garters. 860 00:43:20,960 --> 00:43:23,360 And, um, I-I mustn't be late for Vespers. 861 00:43:26,280 --> 00:43:28,280 I suppose, it's just us then. 862 00:43:29,600 --> 00:43:31,000 Do you think now that I'm staying, 863 00:43:31,080 --> 00:43:32,640 we could make this a regular occurrence? 864 00:43:32,720 --> 00:43:34,120 I don't think so, Norman. No. 865 00:43:34,200 --> 00:43:36,720 Ah. I can take it slow. 866 00:43:36,800 --> 00:43:40,040 Just -- Just like the slime that lives inside the Zybok. 867 00:43:40,120 --> 00:43:42,000 I'll grow on you, Peggy. 868 00:43:42,080 --> 00:43:43,480 You'll see... 869 00:43:43,560 --> 00:43:50,760 {\an8}## 870 00:43:50,840 --> 00:43:57,360 {\an8}## 871 00:43:57,440 --> 00:44:03,880 {\an8}## 872 00:44:03,960 --> 00:44:11,920 {\an8}## 873 00:44:12,000 --> 00:44:19,400 {\an8}## 874 00:44:19,480 --> 00:44:25,200 {\an8}## 56393

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