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1
00:00:04,559 --> 00:00:07,009
HA HA HA HA HA.
2
00:00:17,565 --> 00:00:18,565
JUST KEEP THE OLD ONE?
3
00:00:18,670 --> 00:00:19,981
I THINK THAT'S BEST.
4
00:00:28,639 --> 00:00:32,814
♪ OOH-OOH-OOH ♪
5
00:00:32,952 --> 00:00:35,539
♪ TELL ME WHY ♪
6
00:00:35,677 --> 00:00:37,298
♪ I LOVE YOU LIKE I DO ♪
7
00:00:37,436 --> 00:00:39,092
♪ TELL ME WHO ♪
8
00:00:39,230 --> 00:00:41,956
♪ CAN STOP MY HEART
AS MUCH AS YOU ♪
9
00:00:42,094 --> 00:00:43,992
♪ TELL ME ALL YOUR SECRETS ♪
10
00:00:44,129 --> 00:00:46,061
♪ I'LL TELL YOU MOST OF MINE ♪
11
00:00:46,199 --> 00:00:47,751
♪ THEY SAY NOBODY'S PERFECT ♪
12
00:00:47,889 --> 00:00:50,270
♪ WELL, THAT'S REALLY
TRUE THIS TIME ♪
13
00:00:50,408 --> 00:00:54,651
♪ I DON'T HAVE THE ANSWERS,
I DON'T HAVE A PLAN ♪
14
00:00:54,789 --> 00:00:56,169
♪ ALL I HAVE IS YOU ♪
15
00:00:56,307 --> 00:00:58,583
♪ SO, BABY, HELP ME UNDERSTAND ♪
16
00:00:58,721 --> 00:01:00,584
♪ WHAT WE DO ♪
17
00:01:00,722 --> 00:01:02,689
♪ YOU CAN WHISPER IN MY EAR ♪
18
00:01:02,827 --> 00:01:04,759
♪ WHERE WE GO ♪
19
00:01:04,897 --> 00:01:07,209
♪ WHO KNOWS WHAT
HAPPENS AFTER HERE? ♪
20
00:01:07,347 --> 00:01:09,485
♪ LET'S TAKE EACH OTHER'S HAND ♪
21
00:01:09,623 --> 00:01:12,969
♪ AND JUMP INTO
THE FINAL FRONTIER ♪
22
00:01:13,107 --> 00:01:14,901
♪ AHH-AHH-AH ♪
23
00:01:15,039 --> 00:01:16,764
♪ FINAL FRONTIER ♪
24
00:01:21,422 --> 00:01:23,112
NAH, I GOT THESE CHINESE HERBS,
25
00:01:23,250 --> 00:01:25,217
AND THEY MAKE
IT INTO A TINCTURE.
26
00:01:25,355 --> 00:01:27,769
IT'S UNBELIEVABLE. JUST LIKE
TREES AND BARKS AND LEAVES,
27
00:01:27,907 --> 00:01:29,090
AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY HAVE,
28
00:01:29,114 --> 00:01:30,804
BUT THEY MUSH IT
UP THERE FOR 8.95,
29
00:01:30,942 --> 00:01:33,289
AND I'M TELLING YOU I'VE
NEVER FELT BETTER IN MY LIFE.
30
00:01:33,427 --> 00:01:34,806
I'M SO ENERGETIC.
31
00:01:34,944 --> 00:01:36,842
I'M FULL OF PEP AND
VIM, I'M FOCUSED,
32
00:01:36,980 --> 00:01:40,706
I'M ALIVE, I'M ALERT, I
AM LORD OF THE GALAXY.
33
00:01:40,844 --> 00:01:42,086
HEY.
34
00:01:42,224 --> 00:01:44,156
OOH, MY WIFE IS
HERE. I GOT TO GO.
35
00:01:44,294 --> 00:01:45,501
WHAT ARE YOU, HOME FOR LUNCH?
36
00:01:45,639 --> 00:01:48,296
SADLY, NO. HOME FOR THE
TRUMP FILE, WHICH I FORGOT.
37
00:01:48,434 --> 00:01:50,582
I WAS SO EXHAUSTED THIS
MORNING THAT I LEFT WITHOUT IT,
38
00:01:50,606 --> 00:01:52,780
AND THE PRESENTATION'S
THIS AFTERNOON.
39
00:01:52,918 --> 00:01:54,470
WE STILL OWN THE CHILD, RIGHT?
40
00:01:54,608 --> 00:01:56,885
YES, WE DO. SHE'S
OUT WITH IRA AND LISA.
41
00:01:57,024 --> 00:01:58,472
OH, GOOD. YEAH,
THEY DO THIS THING
42
00:01:58,610 --> 00:02:00,473
WHERE LISA PRETENDS
SHE'S THE MOM.
43
00:02:00,611 --> 00:02:03,027
YOU KNOW, IT'S CUTE, BUT
IT'S REALLY INCREDIBLY SAD.
44
00:02:03,164 --> 00:02:05,717
THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH
MY SISTER HAVING A LITTLE FUN,
45
00:02:05,855 --> 00:02:07,200
SPENDING SOME... HELLO.
46
00:02:07,338 --> 00:02:09,408
SORRY. YOU LOOK NICE.
47
00:02:09,546 --> 00:02:12,031
THANK YOU.
48
00:02:12,168 --> 00:02:14,041
HERE'S A THOUGHT FOR YOU
JUST OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD.
49
00:02:14,065 --> 00:02:15,422
HOW WOULD YOU LIKE
TO STAY HOME FOR LUNCH?
50
00:02:15,446 --> 00:02:16,687
I'M NOT HUNGRY.
51
00:02:16,825 --> 00:02:19,310
WHEN I SAY LUNCH, I
DON'T REALLY MEAN LUNCH.
52
00:02:19,447 --> 00:02:22,449
I MEAN... LUNCH.
53
00:02:22,587 --> 00:02:24,139
OH.
54
00:02:24,277 --> 00:02:25,840
A LITTLE QUICKIE, HUH? A
LITTLE AFTERNOON DELIGHT.
55
00:02:25,864 --> 00:02:26,933
A NOONER.
56
00:02:27,071 --> 00:02:29,003
A NOONER?
57
00:02:29,141 --> 00:02:29,935
WHAT?
58
00:02:30,073 --> 00:02:31,522
THAT'S AN EXPRESSION YOU USE?
59
00:02:31,660 --> 00:02:32,739
YEAH, A LITTLE
FAST ONE. A LEANER.
60
00:02:32,763 --> 00:02:33,832
OH.
61
00:02:33,970 --> 00:02:35,144
A MULLIGAN. WHAT?
62
00:02:35,282 --> 00:02:36,455
A ZIPPITY-DOO-DAH.
63
00:02:36,593 --> 00:02:38,111
WHAT DO YOU DO ALL DAY?
64
00:02:38,249 --> 00:02:39,801
IF YOU'RE NOT INTERESTED, FINE.
65
00:02:39,939 --> 00:02:41,146
A LITTLE ONE-HOUR MARTINIZING.
66
00:02:41,284 --> 00:02:42,940
ALL RIGHT, OK. GOOD GOD.
67
00:02:43,078 --> 00:02:45,631
WHAT DO YOU HAVE
HERE? WHAT IS THIS?
68
00:02:45,769 --> 00:02:48,125
HEY, SWEETIE, EITHER YOU HAVE A
VERY LONG WAIT AT THE BAKERY...
69
00:02:48,149 --> 00:02:50,047
I SIGNED UP FOR
A 10K CHARITY RUN.
70
00:02:50,185 --> 00:02:53,187
REALLY? WELL, GOOD FOR YOU.
WHAT CHARITY DID YOU PICK?
71
00:02:53,325 --> 00:02:54,980
MOTHER TERESA'S MAGIC CHILDREN.
72
00:02:55,119 --> 00:02:56,119
GOOD FOR YOU.
73
00:02:56,153 --> 00:02:58,947
YOU KNOW WHAT? I'M
GONNA SIGN UP, TOO.
74
00:02:59,085 --> 00:03:01,155
REALLY? YEAH.
WE'LL RUN TOGETHER.
75
00:03:01,293 --> 00:03:03,087
YOU AND ME, WE'LL
RUN. IT'LL BE FUN.
76
00:03:03,225 --> 00:03:05,571
SWEETIE, NOT EVERYBODY
HAS TO RUN... PHYSICALLY.
77
00:03:05,709 --> 00:03:06,709
YOU CAN RUN IN SPIRIT.
78
00:03:09,263 --> 00:03:12,091
SWEETIE, IT'S A 10K. 10 WHOLE K.
79
00:03:12,229 --> 00:03:14,137
RIGHT. YOU'RE SAYING YOU
DON'T THINK I CAN RUN 10K?
80
00:03:14,161 --> 00:03:15,368
IN A ROW?
81
00:03:15,506 --> 00:03:18,163
THAT'S NICE. THAT'S
VERY NICE. MY WIFE...
82
00:03:18,301 --> 00:03:20,508
WHO'S SUPPOSED TO BE,
LIKE, MY BIGGEST SUPPORTER,
83
00:03:20,646 --> 00:03:21,926
YOU DON'T THINK I
HAVE THE ENERGY
84
00:03:21,992 --> 00:03:24,441
TO RUN A MEASLY 10 LITTLE K.
85
00:03:24,579 --> 00:03:26,442
DO YOU EVEN KNOW
HOW MUCH A "K" IS?
86
00:03:26,580 --> 00:03:28,823
YES. A "K" IS...
IS 1/10 OF A 10K.
87
00:03:28,961 --> 00:03:30,134
UH-HUH.
88
00:03:30,272 --> 00:03:31,800
WHICH IS, IF YOU CAN DO
IT, PRETTY SURE I CAN DO IT.
89
00:03:31,824 --> 00:03:33,652
OK.
90
00:03:33,790 --> 00:03:34,859
YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK?
91
00:03:34,997 --> 00:03:37,516
I THINK YOU ARE
AFRAID, MY LITTLE FRIEND.
92
00:03:37,654 --> 00:03:39,138
AFRAID OF? EATING MY DUST.
93
00:03:39,276 --> 00:03:41,656
I SEE. UH-HUH.
94
00:03:41,794 --> 00:03:44,209
BUT UNDER THE CIRCUMSTANCES,
I'M GONNA LET IT GO.
95
00:03:44,347 --> 00:03:45,462
THAT'S THE KIND OF PERSON I AM.
96
00:03:45,486 --> 00:03:46,772
I'M GONNA OFFER
YOU A LUNCH WIGGLE.
97
00:03:46,796 --> 00:03:47,658
OH, GOD.
98
00:03:47,796 --> 00:03:49,280
A LITTLE VENEZUELA MAMBO.
99
00:03:49,418 --> 00:03:52,075
SWEETIE, I'M TIRED, I'M
LATE, I CAN'T FIND MY FILE.
100
00:03:52,213 --> 00:03:53,765
YEAH, OK. BIG 10K PERSON
101
00:03:53,903 --> 00:03:55,776
DOESN'T HAVE THE STRENGTH
FOR A LITTLE FIDDLE-FADDLE.
102
00:03:55,800 --> 00:03:57,007
HONEY...
103
00:03:57,146 --> 00:03:58,329
I UNDERSTAND. YOU'RE
A MOM, YOU'RE WORKING.
104
00:03:58,353 --> 00:04:00,054
WHO HAS THE ENERGY FOR A
CHATTANOOGA CHOO-CHOO?
105
00:04:00,078 --> 00:04:02,493
ALL RIGHT. I'LL STAY.
106
00:04:04,425 --> 00:04:05,745
REALLY? NO KIDDING
AROUND? UH-HUH.
107
00:04:05,770 --> 00:04:06,954
SO WE HAVE TIME
FOR A FLOPSY? YEP.
108
00:04:06,978 --> 00:04:08,023
A LITTLE GUGGENHEIM? UH-HUH.
109
00:04:08,047 --> 00:04:09,047
A HUMPHREY.
110
00:04:09,116 --> 00:04:10,473
ONE MORE, I'M GOING
BACK TO THE OFFICE.
111
00:04:10,497 --> 00:04:12,498
LAST ONE, I SWEAR.
112
00:04:17,465 --> 00:04:18,776
YOU KNOW WHAT WAS REALLY HARD
113
00:04:18,914 --> 00:04:20,477
IS LOSING ALL THAT WEIGHT
AFTER MABEL WAS BORN.
114
00:04:20,501 --> 00:04:21,364
PLEASE DON'T DO THIS.
115
00:04:21,502 --> 00:04:23,192
LAST 10 POUNDS WERE REALLY BAD.
116
00:04:23,330 --> 00:04:24,686
YOU UNDERSTAND YOU
ARE NOT HER MOTHER?
117
00:04:24,710 --> 00:04:26,020
AND THE LACTATING AND THE UGH.
118
00:04:26,159 --> 00:04:27,883
THANK GOD YOU'RE JUST HER AUNT.
119
00:04:28,021 --> 00:04:29,470
HEY, I'D BE AN AMAZING MOTHER.
120
00:04:29,608 --> 00:04:31,057
OH, YEAH? YEAH.
121
00:04:31,195 --> 00:04:34,196
IN FACT, I THINK I WANT A
BABY OF MY OWN RIGHT NOW.
122
00:04:34,334 --> 00:04:37,164
OK, JUST A COUPLE OF THINGS
TO CONSIDER, ALL RIGHT?
123
00:04:37,302 --> 00:04:38,302
LIKE WHAT?
124
00:04:38,371 --> 00:04:39,372
LIKE YOU'RE NUTS.
125
00:04:39,510 --> 00:04:40,510
YEAH. YEAH.
126
00:04:40,648 --> 00:04:42,288
AND WHAT ARE YOU GONNA
DO ABOUT A HUSBAND?
127
00:04:42,338 --> 00:04:43,718
I'LL ADOPT.
128
00:04:43,856 --> 00:04:46,029
HEY, DON'T EVEN JOKE
ABOUT SOMETHING LIKE THAT.
129
00:04:46,168 --> 00:04:48,065
I HAVE A NEED TO MOTHER.
130
00:04:48,203 --> 00:04:50,376
WELL, MAYBE YOU SHOULD
NOT START AT THE TOP,
131
00:04:50,514 --> 00:04:51,834
YOU KNOW, LIKE,
WITH A BABY HUMAN.
132
00:04:51,860 --> 00:04:54,205
MAYBE YOU SHOULD START
WITH, LIKE, A CACTUS, YOU KNOW,
133
00:04:54,343 --> 00:04:55,724
OR A BANANA OR SOMETHING.
134
00:04:55,861 --> 00:04:57,689
I CAN MOTHER MORE THAN A BANANA.
135
00:04:57,827 --> 00:04:59,552
HOW ABOUT A MONKEY?
136
00:04:59,690 --> 00:05:01,450
NAH, NAH. A MONKEY'S
TOO EVOLVED.
137
00:05:01,588 --> 00:05:03,451
A TURTLE. GET YOURSELF A TURTLE.
138
00:05:03,589 --> 00:05:05,037
NO, NO, NO. IT HAS TO HAVE FUR.
139
00:05:05,176 --> 00:05:06,453
YOU CAN'T BE A MOTHER
140
00:05:06,590 --> 00:05:08,154
UNLESS THE THING YOU'RE
MOTHERING HAS FUR.
141
00:05:08,178 --> 00:05:09,868
A GERBIL. A COW.
142
00:05:10,006 --> 00:05:11,696
IGUANA. HORSIE.
143
00:05:11,834 --> 00:05:12,938
PARROT. CAT.
144
00:05:13,076 --> 00:05:15,870
HEY, THAT SOUNDS PRETTY
GOOD. GOOD. ADOPT A CAT.
145
00:05:16,008 --> 00:05:16,871
YEAH, I WILL.
146
00:05:17,009 --> 00:05:18,699
WHAT A CUTE BABY.
147
00:05:18,837 --> 00:05:19,906
OH, THANK YOU.
148
00:05:20,044 --> 00:05:22,873
YOU KNOW, I WAS IN
LABOR FOR OVER 70 HOURS.
149
00:05:23,011 --> 00:05:24,011
HERE WE GO.
150
00:05:27,807 --> 00:05:31,049
GOT TO LOVE THOSE NOONERS.
151
00:05:31,188 --> 00:05:33,396
LET'S HEAR IT FOR A NOONER.
152
00:05:33,533 --> 00:05:35,568
IS IT NOON? LET'S HAVE A NOONER.
153
00:05:35,706 --> 00:05:37,949
I'M HUNGRY. ARE YOU HUNGRY?
LET'S EAT. MAKE ME LUNCH.
154
00:05:38,087 --> 00:05:39,087
SLEEPING.
155
00:05:39,191 --> 00:05:40,513
YOU PROMISED YOU WERE
GONNA MAKE ME LUNCH.
156
00:05:40,537 --> 00:05:43,745
AREN'T YA HUNGRY?
AREN'T YA? AREN'T YA?
157
00:05:43,883 --> 00:05:45,573
OW. I-I'M TRYING TO SLEEP.
158
00:05:45,711 --> 00:05:46,953
OK, CORRECT ME IF I'M WRONG,
159
00:05:47,091 --> 00:05:49,092
'CAUSE THAT WAS RIGHT UP
THERE WITH THE BEST EVER.
160
00:05:49,230 --> 00:05:51,575
HONEY, JUST... NO
TALKING, JUST SLEEPING.
161
00:05:51,713 --> 00:05:53,059
THE QUICKEST AND
YET, IRONICALLY,
162
00:05:53,198 --> 00:05:56,922
INCREDIBLY, HAPPILY, WONDERFULLY
AMONG THE VERY BESTEST BEST.
163
00:05:57,060 --> 00:05:58,785
I'LL GIVE YOU $20 TO BE QUIET.
164
00:05:58,923 --> 00:06:00,132
I FEEL SO ENERGIZED...
165
00:06:00,270 --> 00:06:01,270
$30.
166
00:06:01,339 --> 00:06:02,546
SO FILLED WITH VOLTAGE.
167
00:06:02,684 --> 00:06:06,030
I LOVE THIS ENERGY, THESE VOLTS.
168
00:06:06,168 --> 00:06:08,859
"I SING THE BODY ELECTRIC."
169
00:06:08,997 --> 00:06:10,274
IT'S CHI.
170
00:06:10,412 --> 00:06:11,895
HUH?
171
00:06:12,033 --> 00:06:13,413
IT'S CHI.
172
00:06:13,551 --> 00:06:15,759
CHINESE FOR LIFE ENERGY.
173
00:06:15,897 --> 00:06:17,932
YOU HAVE TAKEN ALL MY CHI.
174
00:06:18,070 --> 00:06:20,933
I AM... I'M TOTALLY EMPTY,
EVEN THE EXTRA TANK,
175
00:06:21,071 --> 00:06:23,763
WHICH IS WHY, NOW,
ACCORDING TO CHINESE LEGEND,
176
00:06:23,900 --> 00:06:26,591
I MUST SLEEP FOR
A THOUSAND YEARS.
177
00:06:26,729 --> 00:06:28,050
WELL, LET ME TELL
YOU SOMETHING, BUDDY.
178
00:06:28,074 --> 00:06:29,868
THAT IS SOME PRIMO
CHI YOU GOT THERE,
179
00:06:30,006 --> 00:06:32,042
BECAUSE I AM...
OY, OFFICIALLY LATE.
180
00:06:32,180 --> 00:06:34,364
YOU KNOW WHAT? I DON'T NEED
THAT FILE FOR MY PRESENTATION.
181
00:06:34,388 --> 00:06:35,828
I'LL DO IT OFF THE
CUFF, ON THE SPOT,
182
00:06:35,940 --> 00:06:38,183
RIGHT OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD.
183
00:06:38,320 --> 00:06:39,720
YOU'RE NOT MAKING
ME LUNCH, ARE YOU?
184
00:06:39,839 --> 00:06:41,391
CAN'T EVEN TALK. GOTTA GO.
185
00:06:41,529 --> 00:06:44,289
OK. I'LL JUST GRAB A COBB SALAD.
186
00:06:46,393 --> 00:06:48,498
I JUST FELL ASLEEP AGAIN.
187
00:06:52,706 --> 00:06:54,086
HEY, HEY, HEY, HOW
ABOUT THIS ONE?
188
00:06:54,225 --> 00:06:55,777
LOOKS JUST LIKE ANNETTE BENING.
189
00:06:55,915 --> 00:06:57,195
YEAH, THAT'S JUST WHAT I NEED...
190
00:06:57,260 --> 00:06:59,916
THE CAT THAT'S BETTER
LOOKING THAN ME.
191
00:07:00,054 --> 00:07:01,642
HEY, LOOK AT THAT ONE.
192
00:07:02,952 --> 00:07:04,332
NOW THAT'S A CAT.
193
00:07:04,470 --> 00:07:05,815
NAH. THAT'S A KANGAROO.
194
00:07:08,472 --> 00:07:10,163
HE'S TRYING TO KILL THE RABBIT.
195
00:07:10,301 --> 00:07:11,301
WOW, LOOK AT HIS COAT.
196
00:07:11,439 --> 00:07:12,956
I WONDER WHAT KIND OF CAT IT IS.
197
00:07:13,094 --> 00:07:16,165
THAT WOULD BE THE VERY
RARE HOMICIDAL JUMPING CAT.
198
00:07:16,303 --> 00:07:19,097
HE'S FEISTY. EXCUSE ME.
199
00:07:19,236 --> 00:07:20,650
I'D LIKE TO ADOPT
THIS CAT, PLEASE.
200
00:07:20,788 --> 00:07:22,651
THAT ONE?
201
00:07:22,789 --> 00:07:25,617
YEAH. YOU HAVE A
PROBLEM WITH THAT?
202
00:07:29,895 --> 00:07:31,033
YOU'RE SURE ABOUT THIS?
203
00:07:31,172 --> 00:07:33,690
THE CAT LOOKS LIKE IT
JUST GOT OUT OF BELLEVUE.
204
00:07:33,828 --> 00:07:35,174
I'M TELLING YOU,
GO WITH ANNETTE.
205
00:07:41,555 --> 00:07:42,798
SEE, HE NEEDS ME.
206
00:07:44,798 --> 00:07:46,040
OHH...
207
00:07:46,179 --> 00:07:48,180
OH, YEAH. SCRATCH MY
BACK. THAT FEELS GOOD.
208
00:07:48,318 --> 00:07:49,525
LISA... WHAT? IT'S FINE.
209
00:07:49,663 --> 00:07:52,250
WE'RE GONNA BE GREAT FRIENDS.
210
00:07:57,838 --> 00:08:02,082
BUCHMAN AT THE 5, AND
MURRAY IN HOT PURSUIT.
211
00:08:02,220 --> 00:08:05,463
I SAY, MURRAY... IN HOT PURSUIT.
212
00:08:07,153 --> 00:08:09,189
HIYA. HI.
213
00:08:09,327 --> 00:08:10,807
WHAT, DID YOU FORGET
SOMETHING AT HOME
214
00:08:10,844 --> 00:08:12,051
2 DAYS IN A ROW?
215
00:08:12,190 --> 00:08:14,674
OH, BOY, THE MIND IS
THE FIRST THING TO GO.
216
00:08:14,812 --> 00:08:16,053
THAT IS JUST SO SAD,
217
00:08:16,192 --> 00:08:17,651
BUT I WANT YOU TO KNOW,
HONEY, DON'T WORRY.
218
00:08:17,675 --> 00:08:19,307
WE'RE GONNA PUT YOU IN
A NICE HOME SOMEWHERE,
219
00:08:19,331 --> 00:08:20,653
NOT ONE OF THOSE
STATE-RUN FACILITIES.
220
00:08:20,677 --> 00:08:22,412
I'M TALKING, LIKE, A LOVELY
PLACE IN THE COUNTRY
221
00:08:22,436 --> 00:08:25,023
WITH FINGER PAINTS AND ROSES
AND A NICE LITTLE DUCK POND.
222
00:08:25,161 --> 00:08:27,335
CAN WE HAVE A NOONER? HMM?
223
00:08:27,473 --> 00:08:29,025
PLEASE? I WANT TO HAVE A NOONER.
224
00:08:29,163 --> 00:08:30,888
CAN WE HAVE A NOONER? IT'S NOON.
225
00:08:31,026 --> 00:08:32,371
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
226
00:08:32,509 --> 00:08:35,338
YOU THINK YOU CAN MARCH IN HERE
UNANNOUNCED WHENEVER YOU WANT
227
00:08:35,476 --> 00:08:38,167
AND I'M SUPPOSED TO HOP TO IT
AND SERVICE YOUR EVERY NEED?
228
00:08:38,305 --> 00:08:40,306
YES. EXACTLY.
229
00:08:41,858 --> 00:08:43,031
MM-MM-MM.
230
00:08:43,169 --> 00:08:44,652
YOU KNOW, AFTER
YESTERDAY'S NOONER,
231
00:08:44,790 --> 00:08:47,964
I GOT DONALD TRUMP TO
FUND A DAYCARE CENTER.
232
00:08:48,102 --> 00:08:51,138
THE THING IS, I HAVE TO SOMEHOW
TODAY GET HIM TO PAY FOR
233
00:08:51,277 --> 00:08:53,208
AN ENVIRONMENTALLY
FRIENDLY PLAYGROUND.
234
00:08:53,346 --> 00:08:54,692
I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO DO THIS.
235
00:08:54,830 --> 00:08:57,555
SO IT OCCURRED TO ME, "HEY,
LET'S HAVE ANOTHER NOONER,"
236
00:08:57,693 --> 00:08:59,556
WHICH WILL BE BARRELS
OF FUN IN AND OF ITSELF,
237
00:08:59,694 --> 00:09:02,522
NOT TO MENTION IT'LL MAYBE
JOG MY THINKING A LITTLE BIT.
238
00:09:02,660 --> 00:09:04,396
MM-HMM. I'M ONLY DOING
THIS FOR THE ENVIRONMENT.
239
00:09:04,420 --> 00:09:05,283
YOU'RE A GIVER.
240
00:09:05,421 --> 00:09:06,500
YES, I AM. YOU KNOW WHAT I DID?
241
00:09:06,524 --> 00:09:08,629
I SIGNED UP FOR THE
CHARITY 10K. HEY, HEY.
242
00:09:08,767 --> 00:09:09,629
DON'T TALK.
243
00:09:09,767 --> 00:09:11,664
OK.
244
00:09:14,803 --> 00:09:16,735
I'VE NEVER BEEN USED
LIKE THIS BEFORE IN MY LIFE,
245
00:09:16,873 --> 00:09:18,426
AND I MUST SAY, ME LIKEE.
246
00:09:26,706 --> 00:09:28,983
11, IF YOU PLEASE.
247
00:09:29,120 --> 00:09:31,052
OH, HEY, 11. ME TOO.
248
00:09:31,190 --> 00:09:33,571
OH, YES. THE SISTER.
249
00:09:33,709 --> 00:09:34,571
YOU KNOW WHAT?
250
00:09:34,709 --> 00:09:37,055
I KNOW THAT 11 WOULD BE LOVELY.
251
00:09:37,193 --> 00:09:38,400
I'M A NEW MOTHER.
252
00:09:38,538 --> 00:09:39,574
REALLY?
253
00:09:39,712 --> 00:09:41,988
IT'S A KITTY.
254
00:09:42,126 --> 00:09:44,058
IT'S A BOY. SEE?
255
00:09:44,196 --> 00:09:46,439
VERY NICE TO MEET YOU.
256
00:09:53,131 --> 00:09:56,753
I'M JUST SAYING THAT,
TRANSLATED INTO RUNNING,
257
00:09:56,891 --> 00:10:00,341
WHAT WE JUST DID IS MAYBE
1/8th OF A "K," AND LOOK AT YOU.
258
00:10:00,479 --> 00:10:03,205
DON'T LOOK AT ME. I'M GROTESQUE.
259
00:10:05,516 --> 00:10:07,517
HEY, LISE. HEY.
260
00:10:07,655 --> 00:10:09,345
HEY, HEY, COULD YOU
LEARN TO KNOCK, PLEASE?
261
00:10:09,483 --> 00:10:11,312
I'M BOTTOMLESS
UNDER AN AFGHAN HERE.
262
00:10:11,450 --> 00:10:13,382
CAN I LEAVE THIS HERE
FOR A COUPLE DAYS?
263
00:10:13,520 --> 00:10:14,554
THIS?
264
00:10:14,692 --> 00:10:16,372
DID I SAY THIS WAS
GONNA HAPPEN? I KNEW IT.
265
00:10:21,661 --> 00:10:22,869
MURRAY, IT'S OK, IT'S OK.
266
00:10:23,007 --> 00:10:24,179
IT'S JUST A LITTLE PUDDYCAT.
267
00:10:24,318 --> 00:10:25,179
I GOT TO GO.
268
00:10:25,318 --> 00:10:26,560
I'LL WALK YOU OUT. OK.
269
00:10:26,697 --> 00:10:27,847
WA... WAIT A MINUTE.
WHAT... WHAT...
270
00:10:27,871 --> 00:10:29,251
LOVE YOU. AH-AH.
271
00:10:29,389 --> 00:10:31,942
OK, AT NO POINT DID I SAY THAT
I'M GONNA BE IN CHARGE OF...
272
00:10:33,770 --> 00:10:34,815
WAIT, MURRAY, COME BACK HERE.
273
00:10:34,839 --> 00:10:36,126
COME BACK HERE. COME HERE.
274
00:10:36,150 --> 00:10:37,909
MURRAY. JAMES?
275
00:10:38,047 --> 00:10:40,048
COME BACK HERE.
WHERE'S EVERYBODY GOING?
276
00:10:47,017 --> 00:10:49,950
GOT TO LOVE THOSE NOONERS.
277
00:10:50,087 --> 00:10:53,469
HONEY, DO WE HAVE ANY PIG'S
ADRENALINE IN THE HOUSE?
278
00:10:53,606 --> 00:10:54,917
COME ON. WE'RE GOING RUNNING.
279
00:10:55,055 --> 00:10:56,055
WE'RE WHAT?
280
00:10:56,193 --> 00:10:58,333
COME ON. QUICK 5K
JUST TO WARM UP.
281
00:10:58,471 --> 00:11:01,437
OH, HONEY, DO YOU KNOW
HOW FEW THINGS THERE ARE
282
00:11:01,575 --> 00:11:03,818
THAT ARE LESS LIKELY RIGHT NOW?
283
00:11:03,956 --> 00:11:04,990
AW, COME ON, UNCLE JOE.
284
00:11:05,128 --> 00:11:07,716
WHAT IS THAT, "UNCLE JOE"?
285
00:11:07,854 --> 00:11:09,372
'CAUSE YOU'RE MOVIN' KINDA SLOW.
286
00:11:09,510 --> 00:11:13,305
YOU'RE SO FUNNY AND SO CLEVER.
287
00:11:13,442 --> 00:11:15,443
HONEY, WHAT DO YOU
THINK THE ODDS ARE
288
00:11:15,581 --> 00:11:17,444
OF YOU RUNNING A 10K TOMORROW
289
00:11:17,582 --> 00:11:19,100
IF YOU CAN'T LEAVE
THE HOUSE TODAY?
290
00:11:19,238 --> 00:11:21,619
ALL RIGHT, YOU
WANNA SEE RUNNING?
291
00:11:21,757 --> 00:11:23,251
YOU WANNA SEE RUNNING?
WE'LL SEE SOME RUNNING.
292
00:11:23,275 --> 00:11:26,310
YOU WILL SEE ME
RUN LIKE LIGHTNING.
293
00:11:26,448 --> 00:11:29,450
OH, EVERY DAY, MY FEET
ARE A LITTLE FURTHER AWAY.
294
00:11:29,587 --> 00:11:31,864
I THINK THAT NOONER
WAS THE BEST SO FAR.
295
00:11:32,002 --> 00:11:35,625
I COULD TELL. YOU LET
OUT A SOUND, MY FRIEND,
296
00:11:35,763 --> 00:11:38,489
A WILD SOUND I'D
NEVER HEARD BEFORE.
297
00:11:38,626 --> 00:11:41,869
MY SOUNDS WERE WITHIN
PERFECTLY REASONABLE LIMITS.
298
00:11:42,007 --> 00:11:44,111
WELL, MAYBE YOU DIDN'T
HEAR YOURSELF, BUT IT WAS...
299
00:11:44,249 --> 00:11:46,768
IT WAS LIKE... RRR.
300
00:11:49,769 --> 00:11:50,770
THAT WAS THE NOISE.
301
00:11:53,943 --> 00:11:57,566
ACTUALLY, THAT WAS THE NOISE.
302
00:11:57,704 --> 00:11:59,808
MURRAY.
303
00:12:01,637 --> 00:12:02,637
AAH. AAH.
304
00:12:06,190 --> 00:12:07,570
RRR.
305
00:12:08,743 --> 00:12:10,744
RRR.
306
00:12:13,262 --> 00:12:14,263
RRR.
307
00:12:15,539 --> 00:12:16,539
RRR.
308
00:12:17,575 --> 00:12:18,575
YOU'RE SCARING HIM.
309
00:12:18,609 --> 00:12:20,230
I'M GONNA GET HIM
SOME WARM MILK.
310
00:12:20,369 --> 00:12:21,646
AAH.
311
00:12:21,783 --> 00:12:23,784
WHAT CRAZY MUTANT CAT IS THAT?
312
00:12:24,957 --> 00:12:26,924
MAYBE WE SHOULD CALL SOMEONE.
313
00:12:27,062 --> 00:12:27,924
LIKE WHO?
314
00:12:28,062 --> 00:12:29,304
A S.W.A.T. TEAM...
315
00:12:29,442 --> 00:12:30,890
OR THE EXORCIST...
316
00:12:31,028 --> 00:12:33,409
OR SAY THE POUND.
317
00:12:33,547 --> 00:12:35,237
WHY WOULD YOU CALL THE POUND?
318
00:12:35,376 --> 00:12:37,549
TO TAKE AWAY THE CAT.
319
00:12:37,687 --> 00:12:39,550
YOU CAN'T JUST RETURN THE CAT.
320
00:12:39,688 --> 00:12:41,344
THAT CAT IS LISA'S BABY.
321
00:12:41,482 --> 00:12:43,242
HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF
SOMEONE RETURNED MABEL?
322
00:12:43,276 --> 00:12:45,311
IF MABEL WERE
LEAPING 9 FEET IN THE AIR
323
00:12:45,449 --> 00:12:47,001
AND BITIN' THE TAILS
OFF OF SHEEPDOGS,
324
00:12:47,139 --> 00:12:48,289
I THINK I'D BE OPEN
FOR DISCUSSION.
325
00:12:48,313 --> 00:12:50,899
THE BOOK OF A THOUSAND CATS?
326
00:12:51,037 --> 00:12:52,900
A DOLLAR 98. WHAT DO YOU CARE?
327
00:12:55,281 --> 00:12:56,395
KNOW WHAT? YOU CALL THE POUND.
328
00:12:56,419 --> 00:12:57,534
I'M GONNA GET
MURRAY OUTTA THERE.
329
00:12:57,558 --> 00:12:58,558
BE CAREFUL.
330
00:12:59,903 --> 00:13:01,628
I BELIEVE I WILL BE CAREFUL.
331
00:13:08,769 --> 00:13:09,977
SHH.
332
00:13:54,997 --> 00:13:57,170
THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD...
333
00:13:57,308 --> 00:13:59,585
I SHALL NOT... WAAH.
334
00:13:59,723 --> 00:14:01,379
BAD CAT.
335
00:14:01,517 --> 00:14:03,207
BAD, BAD CAT.
336
00:14:03,346 --> 00:14:05,864
IT HAS PRONOUNCED
EARS, AND HERE'S THE THING,
337
00:14:06,002 --> 00:14:08,348
IT HAS, LIKE, A
BONE-CHILLING CRY.
338
00:14:08,486 --> 00:14:11,350
IT'S A SORT OF A... RRR.
339
00:14:11,487 --> 00:14:14,212
NO, IT'S HIGHER THAN
THAT. LIKE A RRR!
340
00:14:15,351 --> 00:14:16,628
THERE, YOU HEAR THAT?
341
00:14:16,766 --> 00:14:19,525
REALLY INCREDIBLY BAD CAT.
342
00:14:21,837 --> 00:14:23,872
WHAT DO YOU MEAN
IT'S NOT A REGULAR CAT?
343
00:14:24,009 --> 00:14:26,252
WHAT IS IT, THEN? WAIT,
WAIT, WAIT, WAIT. HERE IT IS.
344
00:14:26,390 --> 00:14:28,529
PUMA.
345
00:14:28,667 --> 00:14:32,324
IT'S A BABY PUMA. THERE'S
A PUMA IN THE KITCHEN?
346
00:14:32,462 --> 00:14:36,119
I SAY IT IS YOUR DEPARTMENT.
YOU GAVE IT TO US.
347
00:14:36,257 --> 00:14:37,464
IT'S NOT LIKE WE SAID,
348
00:14:37,602 --> 00:14:40,052
"OH, PLEASE, SEND US
SOME HALF-CRAZED MEAT..."
349
00:14:40,189 --> 00:14:41,829
YEAH, YEAH, YOU'RE
DARN TOOTIN' I'LL HOLD.
350
00:14:41,880 --> 00:14:43,053
HONEY, IT'S A P...
351
00:14:46,365 --> 00:14:47,365
MY GOODNESS.
352
00:14:49,814 --> 00:14:51,159
PAUL, WALK OUT OF HERE.
353
00:14:51,297 --> 00:14:53,920
HONEY, HE'S GOT A REAL
KNACK FOR THIS, OK?
354
00:14:54,058 --> 00:14:56,817
JUST BACK OUT SLOWLY.
355
00:14:56,955 --> 00:14:58,266
PAUL, I JUST...
356
00:14:58,404 --> 00:14:59,578
DO IT.
357
00:14:59,716 --> 00:15:00,819
ALL RIGHT, SWEETIE.
358
00:15:00,957 --> 00:15:03,407
YES. HELLO. A PARK RANGER?
359
00:15:03,545 --> 00:15:05,476
WHERE AM I SUPPOSED
TO FIND A PARK RANGER
360
00:15:05,614 --> 00:15:09,375
IN MANHATTAN, CENTRAL
PARK? OH, CENTRAL PARK.
361
00:15:09,513 --> 00:15:12,342
HONEY, THEY SAY WE HAVE TO...
362
00:15:14,963 --> 00:15:15,826
ARE YOU GOOD?
363
00:15:15,964 --> 00:15:17,827
OH, YEAH.
364
00:15:17,964 --> 00:15:19,172
FINE.
365
00:15:23,174 --> 00:15:24,416
GIVE ME BACK MY CAT.
366
00:15:24,554 --> 00:15:25,899
IT'S TOO DANGEROUS.
367
00:15:26,037 --> 00:15:27,037
FINE. THANK YOU.
368
00:15:28,556 --> 00:15:31,902
WOULD YOU JUST CUT IT OUT?
AND DON'T CALL HIM DANGEROUS.
369
00:15:32,040 --> 00:15:33,903
MY BABY IS NOT DANGEROUS, OK?
370
00:15:34,041 --> 00:15:35,041
OH.
371
00:15:35,110 --> 00:15:36,766
HI.
372
00:15:36,904 --> 00:15:38,284
IT'S IN THERE.
373
00:15:38,422 --> 00:15:40,941
UM, MUST BE EXCITING
BEING A RANGER, HUH?
374
00:15:41,079 --> 00:15:42,217
WELL, IT HAS ITS MOMENTS.
375
00:15:42,355 --> 00:15:43,666
YEAH, BET YOU CAN SEE FAR.
376
00:15:43,804 --> 00:15:44,667
HELP ME.
377
00:15:44,805 --> 00:15:46,426
WHOA, ISN'T HE A BEAUTY.
378
00:15:48,393 --> 00:15:49,393
YEAH, HE'S ADORABLE.
379
00:15:50,531 --> 00:15:51,911
NO. HEY, HEY, WAIT.
380
00:15:52,049 --> 00:15:54,636
IT'S A TRANQUILIZER, JUST
SO I CAN GET HIM TO THE ZOO.
381
00:15:54,774 --> 00:15:57,258
THE ZOO? OH, COME ON, I KNOW
HE'S BEEN A LOT OF TROUBLE.
382
00:15:57,397 --> 00:15:59,338
WELL, YOU TRY AND TEACH
THEM RIGHT FROM WRONG, BUT...
383
00:15:59,362 --> 00:16:00,501
IT'S A CAT.
384
00:16:00,639 --> 00:16:02,088
IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT.
385
00:16:02,226 --> 00:16:04,341
OF COURSE IT'S MY FAULT. I'M
HIS MOTHER. I'M RESPONSIBLE.
386
00:16:04,365 --> 00:16:05,814
IT'S NOBODY'S FAULT.
387
00:16:05,952 --> 00:16:07,918
IT'S A CAT.
388
00:16:08,056 --> 00:16:10,091
THERE'S ONLY SO
MUCH A MOTHER CAN DO.
389
00:16:10,229 --> 00:16:11,919
EVERY CHILD HAS ITS OWN NATURE.
390
00:16:12,057 --> 00:16:13,576
OUR BABY'S A FUSSY EATER.
391
00:16:13,713 --> 00:16:15,921
YOUR BABY'S A...
YOU KNOW, A PUMA.
392
00:16:17,612 --> 00:16:18,682
HONEY, BEHIND YOU. QUICK.
393
00:16:18,820 --> 00:16:20,407
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
SHOOT ME. SHOOT ME.
394
00:16:20,545 --> 00:16:22,062
YOU WANT ME TO? NO.
395
00:16:22,200 --> 00:16:24,063
YOU KNOW WHAT, HONEY?
THE GUY'S ALREADY HERE.
396
00:16:24,201 --> 00:16:25,305
PAUL.
397
00:16:25,443 --> 00:16:26,695
YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU'RE
NOT A MOTHER, ARE YOU?
398
00:16:26,719 --> 00:16:27,720
NO.
399
00:16:27,858 --> 00:16:29,594
SO YOU DON'T KNOW THE
HEARTACHE, THE WORRY...
400
00:16:29,618 --> 00:16:30,697
SHOOT HIM. SHOOT HIM.
401
00:16:31,963 --> 00:16:33,447
HONEY, LOOK OUT.
402
00:16:33,584 --> 00:16:36,793
OW. OW. OW. PUMA. PUMA.
403
00:16:36,931 --> 00:16:37,931
SHOOT HIM.
404
00:16:50,005 --> 00:16:52,973
THE CAT, I'M SAYING.
405
00:16:53,111 --> 00:16:55,042
HONEY...
406
00:16:55,180 --> 00:16:57,580
SO I'LL SEE YA IN, LIKE,
WHAT, 12 TO 14 HOURS?
407
00:16:57,664 --> 00:16:58,664
YEAH. YEAH, OK.
408
00:17:08,635 --> 00:17:10,981
HONEY?
409
00:17:11,119 --> 00:17:13,153
SWEETIE?
410
00:17:13,291 --> 00:17:14,396
PAUL.
411
00:17:14,534 --> 00:17:17,224
♪ BORN FREE ♪
412
00:17:17,362 --> 00:17:19,985
♪ AS FREE AS THE WIND BLOWS ♪
413
00:17:20,123 --> 00:17:21,503
HONEY.
414
00:17:21,641 --> 00:17:22,675
HUH?
415
00:17:22,813 --> 00:17:24,676
IT'S TIME FOR THE 10K, SWEETIE.
416
00:17:24,814 --> 00:17:27,677
OHH, I CAN'T, UH...
417
00:17:27,815 --> 00:17:29,127
I KNOW, I KNOW.
418
00:17:29,264 --> 00:17:32,852
I CAN'T. I-I... YOU GO.
YOU GO HAVE A NICE TIME.
419
00:17:32,990 --> 00:17:36,681
I WILL. I WAS JUST WONDERING
IF MAYBE, BEFORE I DO,
420
00:17:36,819 --> 00:17:38,993
YOU WANNA HAVE A LITTLE FLOPSY?
421
00:17:39,131 --> 00:17:40,821
A WHAT?
422
00:17:40,959 --> 00:17:41,994
A McMULLEN?
423
00:17:42,132 --> 00:17:42,995
A MULLIGAN.
424
00:17:43,133 --> 00:17:43,995
WHATEVER IT IS.
425
00:17:44,133 --> 00:17:45,306
NO.
426
00:17:45,444 --> 00:17:46,973
IT'LL GIVE ME THAT EDGE,
THAT LITTLE EXTRA SOMETHING.
427
00:17:46,997 --> 00:17:48,456
NO, I DON'T HAVE
ANYTHING TO GIVE YOU.
428
00:17:48,480 --> 00:17:49,549
SURE, YOU DO.
429
00:17:49,687 --> 00:17:51,516
OH, SWEETIE, I HAVE
BEEN SHOT IN THE ASS
430
00:17:51,654 --> 00:17:54,000
WITH A TRANQUILIZER
GUN. THERE. OW.
431
00:17:54,138 --> 00:17:55,310
PLEASE? NO.
432
00:17:55,449 --> 00:17:58,864
I'VE BEEN BITTEN IN THE
COLON. NO, IT WOULD KILL ME.
433
00:17:59,002 --> 00:18:00,899
OH, FINE, IF YOU
DON'T CARE ABOUT
434
00:18:01,037 --> 00:18:02,317
MOTHER TERESA'S
MAGIC CHILDREN...
435
00:18:02,348 --> 00:18:03,693
DON'T DO THAT TO ME.
436
00:18:03,831 --> 00:18:05,429
NO, NO, NO, FINE. IF YOU'RE
WILLING TO SUCK THE MAGIC
437
00:18:05,453 --> 00:18:06,740
OUT OF THEIR
DESPERATE LITTLE LIVES...
438
00:18:06,764 --> 00:18:08,109
I'M BEGGIN' YOU.
439
00:18:08,247 --> 00:18:11,421
MOST OF THESE CHILDREN HAVE
NEVER EVEN HAD A DAY IN THE SUN.
440
00:18:11,559 --> 00:18:12,663
ALL RIGHT. LET'S GO.
441
00:18:12,801 --> 00:18:15,974
MAYBE HALF A GUGGENHEIM,
BUT THEN I GOTTA LIE DOWN.
442
00:18:24,807 --> 00:18:26,247
LOOK, I CAN'T WORK
WITH YOU THIS WAY.
443
00:18:26,290 --> 00:18:29,843
I ASK YOU TO MEOW, YOU LEAP.
I ASK YOU TO LEAP, YOU HISS.
444
00:18:29,981 --> 00:18:31,395
I ASK YOU TO HISS, YOU SWAT.
445
00:18:31,534 --> 00:18:34,535
ACTUALLY, WE
CALL THAT "SWIPING."
446
00:18:34,673 --> 00:18:36,777
SHUT UP. I'M AN ADULT.
447
00:18:36,915 --> 00:18:40,434
I JUST SPENT THE LAST 5 DAYS
DIRECTING A FREAKING CAT.
448
00:18:41,745 --> 00:18:43,470
SURE. NOW.
449
00:18:45,091 --> 00:18:47,299
YOU CALL YOURSELF A
CAT? YOU'RE NOT A CAT.
450
00:18:47,437 --> 00:18:50,473
MURRAY'S A DOG, AND HE'S
A BETTER CAT THAN YOU ARE.
451
00:18:50,611 --> 00:18:53,544
MURRAY WALKS IN, HITS HIS
MARK, LOOKS UP, AND BARKS.
452
00:18:53,682 --> 00:18:55,234
YOU'RE NOT EVEN LOOKING AT ME.
453
00:18:55,372 --> 00:18:59,546
SEE, YOU SHOULDN'T
EVEN BE IN S.A.G.
454
00:18:59,684 --> 00:19:02,961
YOU GOTTA MAKE
EYE CONTACT WITH ME.
455
00:19:03,099 --> 00:19:04,582
♪ OOH-OOH-OOH ♪
456
00:19:06,549 --> 00:19:08,584
♪ OOH-OOH-OOH ♪
457
00:19:10,999 --> 00:19:12,690
♪ OOH-OOH-OOH ♪
458
00:19:15,001 --> 00:19:16,657
♪ OOH-OOH-OOH ♪
459
00:19:18,899 --> 00:19:20,762
♪ OOH-OOH-OOH ♪
460
00:19:22,866 --> 00:19:24,247
♪ OOH-OOH ♪
461
00:21:12,328 --> 00:21:14,157
IN FRONT.
31929
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