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1
00:00:02,933 --> 00:00:04,795
Come on, Mabel,
just say anything.
2
00:00:06,863 --> 00:00:08,587
Oh, my god. Did you hear that?
3
00:00:08,725 --> 00:00:09,965
Mabel just spoke.
4
00:00:10,103 --> 00:00:11,138
Oh, she did not.
5
00:00:11,276 --> 00:00:12,827
Right there. It
was her first words.
6
00:00:12,965 --> 00:00:13,999
Uh-huh. What were they?
7
00:00:14,137 --> 00:00:15,895
She just said, "On Wisconsin."
8
00:00:16,033 --> 00:00:17,033
I see.
9
00:00:17,171 --> 00:00:18,619
Hey, I'm as
surprised as you are.
10
00:00:18,757 --> 00:00:21,067
But clear as a bell, she
said, "On Wisconsin."
11
00:00:21,205 --> 00:00:22,446
Why would she, really?
12
00:00:22,584 --> 00:00:24,584
Why? I don't know.
Maybe she hates Michigan.
13
00:00:24,721 --> 00:00:26,307
I promise you
she will talk soon.
14
00:00:26,445 --> 00:00:27,859
All right.
15
00:00:27,997 --> 00:00:29,858
Tell her you'd marry
her all over again.
16
00:00:29,996 --> 00:00:32,685
Tell her you love her
more than yesterday,
17
00:00:32,823 --> 00:00:35,098
but not as much as tomorrow.
18
00:00:35,236 --> 00:00:38,270
Mmm, tell her that next Thursday
19
00:00:38,408 --> 00:00:40,752
you will love her more
than next Wednesday,
20
00:00:40,890 --> 00:00:43,373
but not quite as much
as a week from Saturday.
21
00:00:43,511 --> 00:00:44,820
While in the month of July,
22
00:00:44,958 --> 00:00:46,372
oh, how you'll love...
23
00:00:46,510 --> 00:00:48,130
Oh, he loves her! What's that?
24
00:00:48,268 --> 00:00:50,509
More than yesterday, but
not as much as tomorrow.
25
00:00:50,647 --> 00:00:51,922
That's so sweet.
26
00:00:52,060 --> 00:00:54,267
Oh, sweetie, not
to burst your bubble,
27
00:00:54,404 --> 00:00:56,128
but he's an actor.
28
00:00:56,266 --> 00:00:57,852
Would you do it all again? What?
29
00:00:57,990 --> 00:00:59,093
Marry me.
30
00:00:59,231 --> 00:01:00,886
You mean, now that
I know you're sappy?
31
00:01:01,023 --> 00:01:03,265
I'm serious, are you sure
you'd marry me again,
32
00:01:03,403 --> 00:01:04,575
right now, if we met today?
33
00:01:04,713 --> 00:01:06,229
Instantly. Instantly, I would.
34
00:01:06,368 --> 00:01:08,022
Then let's do it.
35
00:01:08,160 --> 00:01:10,297
Do what? Let's renew our vows.
36
00:01:11,297 --> 00:01:12,297
I don't, uh...
37
00:01:12,436 --> 00:01:13,849
I don't even know
what that means.
38
00:01:13,987 --> 00:01:16,158
Let's renew our vows,
let's get married again,
39
00:01:16,296 --> 00:01:17,606
in front of God and everybody.
40
00:01:17,744 --> 00:01:19,813
Okay, God, maybe, but
another seating chart,
41
00:01:19,950 --> 00:01:21,399
frankly, my head would explode.
42
00:01:21,537 --> 00:01:23,192
It's been such a long time.
43
00:01:23,329 --> 00:01:25,502
Yes, but it's sort of like...
44
00:01:25,640 --> 00:01:27,708
The vow... It's a vow.
45
00:01:27,846 --> 00:01:29,811
Once a vow is a
vow, that's a vow.
46
00:01:29,948 --> 00:01:32,396
Yes, but we're not
who we were then.
47
00:01:32,534 --> 00:01:34,431
Look at us. We're
sleep deprived,
48
00:01:34,569 --> 00:01:37,016
We're knee-deep in work and poop
49
00:01:37,154 --> 00:01:38,912
and projectile squash.
50
00:01:39,050 --> 00:01:41,670
Honey, we're the same
people, essentially,
51
00:01:41,808 --> 00:01:44,221
we're just a little
more disgusting.
52
00:01:44,360 --> 00:01:46,738
Those are the people that
need to renew their vows.
53
00:01:46,876 --> 00:01:48,082
The disgusting people?
54
00:01:48,220 --> 00:01:49,531
There are new things to say,
55
00:01:49,668 --> 00:01:52,013
things we didn't know
when we got married at 14.
56
00:01:52,150 --> 00:01:53,565
We weren't 14. We were young.
57
00:01:53,703 --> 00:01:55,633
We weren't thatyoung.
Oh, we were soyoung...
58
00:01:55,771 --> 00:01:57,012
Okay, okay, we were very young.
59
00:01:57,149 --> 00:01:59,080
We knew nothing! Can
I tell you something?
60
00:01:59,218 --> 00:02:00,873
When we gave our
vows the first time
61
00:02:01,011 --> 00:02:03,907
and I promised to swear
to respect, and honor,
62
00:02:04,045 --> 00:02:05,665
and tell the truth,
the whole truth,
63
00:02:05,803 --> 00:02:08,078
and nothing but the
truth... That still stands now.
64
00:02:08,216 --> 00:02:09,595
Fine.
65
00:02:09,733 --> 00:02:12,457
Can we discuss this another
time, like, I don't know, never?
66
00:02:12,595 --> 00:02:15,180
My throat is doing
something horrendous inside.
67
00:02:15,318 --> 00:02:16,353
Oh, suck it up.
68
00:02:16,491 --> 00:02:17,973
I'm sorry?
69
00:02:18,111 --> 00:02:19,421
I'm gonna be folding laundry
70
00:02:19,559 --> 00:02:20,937
till about the year 2006.
71
00:02:21,075 --> 00:02:22,559
I have a few of my
own problems, okay?
72
00:02:23,972 --> 00:02:25,799
So I'’m guessing in
sickness and in health,
73
00:02:25,936 --> 00:02:27,212
not a big part of the new vows.
74
00:02:27,351 --> 00:02:29,591
Hello. I just came
by to drop off
75
00:02:29,729 --> 00:02:31,557
a present for my favorite baby.
76
00:02:31,694 --> 00:02:33,694
Is she gonna love this or what?
77
00:02:33,832 --> 00:02:35,072
A truck?
78
00:02:35,210 --> 00:02:36,383
Yeah. Why?
79
00:02:36,521 --> 00:02:38,210
A truck?
80
00:02:38,348 --> 00:02:40,589
What's wrong with you?
What is wrong with her?
81
00:02:40,726 --> 00:02:41,761
What is wrong with you?
82
00:02:41,899 --> 00:02:43,140
Hey, what's wrong with you?
83
00:02:43,277 --> 00:02:45,208
Huh? Oh, I got a
throat thing going on...
84
00:02:45,347 --> 00:02:47,105
Oh, god, all right, excuse me.
85
00:02:47,243 --> 00:02:49,276
Let me see if we have
any sniffling-sneezing
86
00:02:49,415 --> 00:02:51,346
my-husband's-
a-big-wussy medicine.
87
00:02:51,483 --> 00:02:53,172
You're so sparkly.
88
00:02:54,965 --> 00:02:56,551
Is everything okay?
89
00:02:56,689 --> 00:02:57,999
Huh? Yeah, it's fine.
90
00:02:58,136 --> 00:02:59,309
All right.
91
00:02:59,447 --> 00:03:01,309
Hey, Mabel, look what Uncle Ira
92
00:03:01,446 --> 00:03:02,515
brought you, a present.
93
00:03:02,653 --> 00:03:04,894
Can you say "truck," huh? Truck?
94
00:03:05,032 --> 00:03:06,204
Can you say "truck"?
95
00:03:07,549 --> 00:03:08,755
Wow. What?
96
00:03:08,893 --> 00:03:09,962
Did you hear that?
97
00:03:10,100 --> 00:03:11,479
She just spoke. She just spoke!
98
00:03:11,617 --> 00:03:12,892
She did? Yeah, she just said,
99
00:03:13,030 --> 00:03:14,616
"Sausages are free."
100
00:03:15,788 --> 00:03:16,994
I think it was gurgling.
101
00:03:17,132 --> 00:03:18,718
Clear as day, she just said...
102
00:03:18,856 --> 00:03:21,580
She just said,
"Sausages are free."
103
00:03:21,718 --> 00:03:22,924
Honey, did you hear that?
104
00:03:23,062 --> 00:03:24,166
It was gurgling.
105
00:03:24,304 --> 00:03:26,061
All right. What's
that from anyway,
106
00:03:26,199 --> 00:03:28,199
like, is that from the
Bible or something?
107
00:03:29,371 --> 00:03:30,923
"Sausages are free?"
108
00:03:31,060 --> 00:03:32,371
Yeah.
109
00:03:34,336 --> 00:03:36,025
Yes. Yes, it's from the Bible.
110
00:03:36,163 --> 00:03:37,266
Yes, it is.
111
00:03:37,405 --> 00:03:40,127
Book of Jimmy Dean,
chapter 3, verse 12.
112
00:03:40,265 --> 00:03:42,404
Oh, like you're
Cardinal Cushing.
113
00:03:42,541 --> 00:03:44,058
Oh, boy, it's like a knife
114
00:03:44,195 --> 00:03:45,850
being shoved down my esophagus.
115
00:03:45,988 --> 00:03:48,402
It's like broken
shards of glass,
116
00:03:48,540 --> 00:03:50,056
like swallowing the whole glass.
117
00:03:50,194 --> 00:03:52,573
Like a gunnysack of
ouch is surrounding...
118
00:03:52,711 --> 00:03:53,918
Oh, my god. Tea, okay?
119
00:03:54,056 --> 00:03:55,332
Sweetie, this is something.
120
00:03:55,470 --> 00:03:57,952
This is no kidding around.
I'm calling Dr. Hazelkorn.
121
00:03:58,090 --> 00:03:59,572
It's a sore throat.
Drink your tea
122
00:03:59,710 --> 00:04:01,296
and don't talk
for eight seconds.
123
00:04:01,434 --> 00:04:03,984
Mmm. Hi. This is Paul Buchman.
124
00:04:04,122 --> 00:04:05,157
Here's the situation.
125
00:04:05,295 --> 00:04:06,984
I can no longer swallow.
126
00:04:07,122 --> 00:04:09,121
Oh, it's like hot lava.
127
00:04:09,259 --> 00:04:10,983
It's like a sword swallower's
128
00:04:11,121 --> 00:04:12,362
first day on the job.
129
00:04:12,500 --> 00:04:15,913
You know, like, picture
a thousand nails...
130
00:04:16,051 --> 00:04:18,809
I'm just trying to
give you a sense.
131
00:04:18,947 --> 00:04:20,705
Wednesday? Next Wednesday.
132
00:04:20,843 --> 00:04:22,118
That's kind of a...
133
00:04:22,256 --> 00:04:25,601
Here's the... it's like
rusted barbed wire
134
00:04:25,739 --> 00:04:28,463
being just pushed
down my windpipe...
135
00:04:28,601 --> 00:04:31,289
Tomorrow? Well,
that's better but I...
136
00:04:31,427 --> 00:04:34,289
To be honest... Picture
hot bacon grease
137
00:04:34,427 --> 00:04:36,461
if they're pouring it
down in your raw gullet
138
00:04:36,599 --> 00:04:39,046
and you get burning... I'll
be right over, thank you.
139
00:04:48,113 --> 00:04:50,320
Did you just say,
"You've got mail?"
140
00:04:51,665 --> 00:04:52,665
Hey!
141
00:04:52,698 --> 00:04:54,043
Hey.
142
00:04:54,181 --> 00:04:56,008
Guess what I am? What are you?
143
00:04:56,146 --> 00:04:58,904
You are looking at
a little miss mentor.
144
00:04:59,042 --> 00:05:00,835
I don't know what
you're saying to me.
145
00:05:00,972 --> 00:05:02,972
It's like big sisters.
I've been selected
146
00:05:03,110 --> 00:05:05,317
to give valuable life
guidance to a little girl.
147
00:05:05,455 --> 00:05:07,109
How in the world
did they select you?
148
00:05:07,247 --> 00:05:09,040
I stole your résumé
and put my name on it.
149
00:05:09,177 --> 00:05:10,695
Lisa! That Yale thing you did,
150
00:05:10,832 --> 00:05:12,108
I really get that now.
151
00:05:13,315 --> 00:05:14,176
Oops.
152
00:05:14,315 --> 00:05:15,315
Oops?
153
00:05:15,349 --> 00:05:16,349
Emily.
154
00:05:16,384 --> 00:05:17,417
You left her in the hall?
155
00:05:17,555 --> 00:05:19,934
She has to learn
to love herself.
156
00:05:21,830 --> 00:05:23,140
Emily, this is Jamie.
157
00:05:23,278 --> 00:05:24,589
Hi, Jamie. Hi, Emily.
158
00:05:24,727 --> 00:05:26,622
It's nice to meet you.
159
00:05:26,760 --> 00:05:28,104
Excuse me, Emily, one second.
160
00:05:28,242 --> 00:05:29,602
Ok, Emily, we have
a big day, okay?
161
00:05:29,725 --> 00:05:30,897
We need energy food.
162
00:05:31,035 --> 00:05:32,035
Do you have doughnuts?
163
00:05:32,173 --> 00:05:33,276
Hello. Hi.
164
00:05:33,414 --> 00:05:35,207
Never mind. We'll figure it out.
165
00:05:35,345 --> 00:05:37,171
Whenever you go
to a person's house,
166
00:05:37,310 --> 00:05:39,379
you always take their doughnuts.
167
00:05:39,517 --> 00:05:42,170
So, what did they say,
you gonna pull through?
168
00:05:42,309 --> 00:05:45,101
Oh, my god? You're
kidding? Today?
169
00:05:45,239 --> 00:05:47,687
Oh, my god. Okay.
170
00:05:47,825 --> 00:05:50,100
I'll be right there.
171
00:05:50,238 --> 00:05:51,721
Come on, you cute thing,
172
00:05:51,859 --> 00:05:53,720
we're gonna go see
daddy in the hospital.
173
00:05:53,858 --> 00:05:55,203
He has to have his tonsils out.
174
00:06:03,787 --> 00:06:05,993
Oh, sweetie.
175
00:06:06,131 --> 00:06:07,304
Hello.
176
00:06:07,442 --> 00:06:09,544
Oh, look at you. Are you okay?
177
00:06:09,682 --> 00:06:11,199
Mm-hmm. Oh,
178
00:06:11,337 --> 00:06:12,992
I'm so sorry. It's okay.
179
00:06:13,130 --> 00:06:14,992
I didn't know you
were really sick.
180
00:06:15,129 --> 00:06:16,198
How could you know?
181
00:06:16,336 --> 00:06:18,060
I'm sorry I told
you to suck it up.
182
00:06:18,198 --> 00:06:19,301
Forget it.
183
00:06:19,439 --> 00:06:21,645
I'm sorry I brought
you tea only grudgingly.
184
00:06:21,783 --> 00:06:24,714
Didn't even pick that up.
185
00:06:24,852 --> 00:06:26,747
Tell me what you
need, is there anything
186
00:06:26,885 --> 00:06:28,161
I can do for you?
187
00:06:28,299 --> 00:06:31,539
You'll be happy to know
I'm in excellent hands here.
188
00:06:31,677 --> 00:06:33,263
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah.
189
00:06:33,401 --> 00:06:35,883
You really shouldn't
be making him talk.
190
00:06:36,021 --> 00:06:38,056
That really hurts, doesn't it?
191
00:06:51,466 --> 00:06:53,983
Oh, those great big
tonsils can be painful.
192
00:06:54,121 --> 00:06:55,672
And you've got
the biggest tonsils
193
00:06:55,810 --> 00:06:57,258
I've ever seen, heh, heh.
194
00:07:01,395 --> 00:07:04,015
Oh, this is Jamie
and Mabel over there.
195
00:07:04,153 --> 00:07:05,153
Hi, I'm his...
196
00:07:05,292 --> 00:07:06,946
Hello, Mabel.
197
00:07:09,635 --> 00:07:13,013
Oh, you were right.
She is adorable.
198
00:07:13,151 --> 00:07:15,254
I heard about you too.
199
00:07:15,392 --> 00:07:16,461
You did?
200
00:07:16,599 --> 00:07:18,702
You know, I really
can't blame you
201
00:07:18,840 --> 00:07:20,702
for not noticing
little medical things,
202
00:07:20,840 --> 00:07:22,495
being so busy and all.
203
00:07:22,633 --> 00:07:24,184
Honey I had to talk
about something
204
00:07:24,321 --> 00:07:25,390
during the sponge bath.
205
00:07:28,458 --> 00:07:31,113
I picked these out just for you.
206
00:07:31,251 --> 00:07:33,423
Anything strike your fancy?
207
00:07:45,903 --> 00:07:47,385
I'll be right back.
208
00:07:47,523 --> 00:07:48,523
All right, listen...
209
00:07:48,558 --> 00:07:50,143
You know, I really think
210
00:07:50,282 --> 00:07:51,420
he needs his rest now.
211
00:07:51,557 --> 00:07:53,315
I really think I knew that.
212
00:07:56,281 --> 00:07:58,934
That's the fastest I
ever hated anyone.
213
00:07:59,072 --> 00:08:00,141
She's a godsend.
214
00:08:00,280 --> 00:08:01,727
All right.
215
00:08:01,865 --> 00:08:03,933
I get it. All right?
216
00:08:04,071 --> 00:08:05,175
What? If I won't help you,
217
00:08:05,313 --> 00:08:06,657
the pretty girl will. I get it.
218
00:08:06,795 --> 00:08:08,347
Good. So skit over?
219
00:08:08,485 --> 00:08:09,691
No.
220
00:08:09,829 --> 00:08:12,070
Paul, you poor
guy, your tonsils.
221
00:08:12,207 --> 00:08:13,931
I feel so terrible. Are
you gonna be okay?
222
00:08:14,069 --> 00:08:15,380
I hope so. Bye.
223
00:08:15,517 --> 00:08:17,241
That's called,
"Showing your face."
224
00:08:17,379 --> 00:08:19,276
Who-who's The little girl?
225
00:08:19,414 --> 00:08:21,034
Lisa's protégé.
226
00:08:21,171 --> 00:08:22,309
Why?
227
00:08:22,447 --> 00:08:24,998
Paulie, Paulie,
Paulie, look at you.
228
00:08:25,136 --> 00:08:26,412
Splinky, is this something?
229
00:08:26,550 --> 00:08:29,066
What are you, like, 40 now
and getting your tonsils out?
230
00:08:29,204 --> 00:08:30,342
So?
231
00:08:30,480 --> 00:08:32,652
No, it's cool there's a
six-year-old next door
232
00:08:32,789 --> 00:08:34,100
with an enlarged prostate.
233
00:08:34,238 --> 00:08:36,513
Hi, Paulie. Mommy's here.
234
00:08:36,651 --> 00:08:37,961
Okay, I'm officially seven.
235
00:08:38,099 --> 00:08:39,099
How do you feel?
236
00:08:39,133 --> 00:08:41,132
Shh. Don't talk.
237
00:08:41,271 --> 00:08:42,547
What did they say?
238
00:08:42,684 --> 00:08:44,339
Shh. Don't talk.
239
00:08:44,477 --> 00:08:45,890
Who is this doctor, and why
240
00:08:46,028 --> 00:08:47,648
didn't you call Dr. Fishman?
241
00:08:47,786 --> 00:08:49,166
Shh. Don't talk.
242
00:08:50,821 --> 00:08:51,958
Oh!
243
00:08:52,096 --> 00:08:54,716
My angel, ha-ha-ha!
244
00:08:54,854 --> 00:08:57,646
Come here, come here,
Come here, come here.
245
00:08:57,784 --> 00:08:59,956
Ma, she's there.
246
00:09:00,094 --> 00:09:03,990
Mrs. Roycroft's granddaughter
said her first word.
247
00:09:04,127 --> 00:09:05,645
We're hoping soon, Sylvia.
248
00:09:05,782 --> 00:09:07,713
You know what
Paulie's first word was?
249
00:09:07,851 --> 00:09:08,851
Mama.
250
00:09:08,920 --> 00:09:10,541
Shocking.
251
00:09:10,678 --> 00:09:13,574
Can you say "grandma?"
252
00:09:13,712 --> 00:09:15,436
Mabel, can you say "truck?"
253
00:09:15,573 --> 00:09:17,194
Can you say "truck?"
254
00:09:17,332 --> 00:09:19,814
Truck? Who gives a girl a truck?
255
00:09:19,952 --> 00:09:22,469
It's a brave new
world, Aunt Syl.
256
00:09:22,607 --> 00:09:24,469
When I was a kid, I
had my tonsils out.
257
00:09:24,607 --> 00:09:25,675
Everybody ate ice cream.
258
00:09:25,813 --> 00:09:26,847
Me, too.
259
00:09:26,985 --> 00:09:28,537
Maybe we should
get ice cream after.
260
00:09:28,675 --> 00:09:30,475
Do you want Haäagen-Dazs
or Ben & Jerry's?
261
00:09:30,605 --> 00:09:32,225
Haäagen-Dazs is
around the corner.
262
00:09:32,363 --> 00:09:33,683
Oh, but Ben &
Jerry's, my god.
263
00:09:33,811 --> 00:09:35,052
Starbucks java chip.
264
00:09:36,638 --> 00:09:39,466
Hello, hello! Surgery.
265
00:09:40,568 --> 00:09:42,050
It's almost time.
266
00:09:42,188 --> 00:09:44,533
Now, I know you're
probably scared,
267
00:09:44,671 --> 00:09:46,843
but don't you worry
that handsome head.
268
00:09:46,980 --> 00:09:49,463
With the anesthesia,
you won't feel a thing.
269
00:09:49,601 --> 00:09:51,117
And when it's over
and you wake up,
270
00:09:51,256 --> 00:09:52,359
I'll be there.
271
00:09:52,497 --> 00:09:54,393
Oh, thank god.
272
00:09:54,531 --> 00:09:56,013
You're such a pretty girl.
273
00:09:56,151 --> 00:09:57,531
I wish I had another son.
274
00:09:59,530 --> 00:10:01,219
Sweetie? Yeah.
275
00:10:01,357 --> 00:10:04,943
Listen, I want your face
to be the last thing I see,
276
00:10:05,080 --> 00:10:06,769
Just in case, you know?
277
00:10:06,907 --> 00:10:08,218
What just in case?
278
00:10:08,355 --> 00:10:09,873
Listen, with general anesthesia
279
00:10:10,010 --> 00:10:11,630
you never know
anything could hap...
280
00:10:11,768 --> 00:10:14,181
Those words never
came outta your mouth.
281
00:10:14,320 --> 00:10:16,698
It's a long shot, you
have to acknowledge...
282
00:10:16,836 --> 00:10:18,250
It's time, Mr. Buchman.
283
00:10:18,388 --> 00:10:20,835
Okay, it's time.
Thank you, Gino.
284
00:10:20,973 --> 00:10:22,835
All right, here we go.
285
00:10:24,559 --> 00:10:25,559
You okay?
286
00:10:25,696 --> 00:10:27,558
I always make that noise. Oh.
287
00:10:27,696 --> 00:10:29,696
Okay, Paulie, here
we go right this way.
288
00:10:29,833 --> 00:10:32,075
You know something?
You're gonna be just fine.
289
00:10:32,213 --> 00:10:34,281
And then you're gonna
play with your daughter
290
00:10:34,419 --> 00:10:37,176
and her truck. Can
you say "truck"?
291
00:10:37,315 --> 00:10:41,314
"Truck"? Come on,
say it, Mabel, "truck."
292
00:10:41,452 --> 00:10:42,728
Schmuck!
293
00:10:44,279 --> 00:10:45,520
Oh, my god.
294
00:10:45,658 --> 00:10:46,934
Sweetie, she spoke.
295
00:10:47,071 --> 00:10:48,174
Schmuck.
296
00:10:48,313 --> 00:10:49,622
Yeah, that's the good news.
297
00:10:49,760 --> 00:10:51,588
The bad news is she's grounded.
298
00:10:52,932 --> 00:10:54,173
Schmuck. IRA: Oy.
299
00:10:54,312 --> 00:10:55,656
Schmuck.
300
00:10:55,794 --> 00:10:58,552
I can't tell this
to Mrs. Roycroft.
301
00:10:58,689 --> 00:10:59,827
Aunt Syl, it'’ll be fine.
302
00:10:59,965 --> 00:11:01,930
Undo this.
303
00:11:02,068 --> 00:11:03,826
Can you say "mama"?
304
00:11:03,964 --> 00:11:04,999
Schmuck.
305
00:11:05,137 --> 00:11:06,688
It's hard not to
take it personally
306
00:11:06,826 --> 00:11:08,274
when she's looking right at you.
307
00:11:08,412 --> 00:11:10,067
Mr. Buchman, the
doctor is waiting.
308
00:11:10,204 --> 00:11:12,308
Yeah, okay. Would
everybody just excuse me?
309
00:11:12,446 --> 00:11:14,479
I'd like a minute alone
with my wife, please.
310
00:11:14,617 --> 00:11:16,203
What is it? Schmuck.
311
00:11:16,341 --> 00:11:17,582
I just...
312
00:11:17,720 --> 00:11:19,789
I just want to say
something to you.
313
00:11:19,927 --> 00:11:22,857
Should anything happen...
I mean, I know it won't,
314
00:11:22,995 --> 00:11:25,236
but better safe than sorry.
315
00:11:25,374 --> 00:11:26,581
What is it?
316
00:11:26,718 --> 00:11:28,442
I...
317
00:11:28,580 --> 00:11:30,752
I want you to know...
318
00:11:30,889 --> 00:11:33,786
that you are the
single greatest blessing
319
00:11:33,924 --> 00:11:35,337
I have ever received.
320
00:11:35,475 --> 00:11:39,163
I mean, I don't know why
we're put here on this Earth.
321
00:11:39,302 --> 00:11:41,473
I don't know what
they want from us.
322
00:11:41,611 --> 00:11:44,611
Except, I have always known
323
00:11:44,749 --> 00:11:47,990
that I am supposed
to be by your side
324
00:11:48,127 --> 00:11:52,609
and taking care of you
and having a family with you
325
00:11:52,747 --> 00:11:55,057
and making you happy.
326
00:11:56,781 --> 00:12:01,366
I-In a universe that's, like,
99 percent disappointment,
327
00:12:01,504 --> 00:12:04,848
You... you are
the one sure thing.
328
00:12:04,986 --> 00:12:08,812
You are the proof
that life is good.
329
00:12:08,950 --> 00:12:11,019
You are my life.
330
00:12:12,743 --> 00:12:14,639
What the hell's the
matter with you?
331
00:12:14,777 --> 00:12:15,984
Hmm?
332
00:12:16,121 --> 00:12:17,845
How could you do this to me?
333
00:12:17,983 --> 00:12:19,190
What?
334
00:12:19,328 --> 00:12:21,085
They're gonna
operate in four seconds,
335
00:12:21,224 --> 00:12:22,775
you give me a speech like that?
336
00:12:22,913 --> 00:12:24,395
Just a sec... I was fine.
337
00:12:24,533 --> 00:12:25,637
I know that.
338
00:12:25,775 --> 00:12:27,774
It's a tonsillectomy,
for crying out loud.
339
00:12:27,912 --> 00:12:29,946
I was going to the
cafeteria to have a sandwich
340
00:12:30,084 --> 00:12:32,187
now I think I'll just
pace a hole in the floor.
341
00:12:32,325 --> 00:12:34,083
It was just in case,
like cautionary...
342
00:12:34,222 --> 00:12:35,600
Well, thank you very much.
343
00:12:35,738 --> 00:12:37,703
It's a hypothetical,
in case. In case-ily.
344
00:12:37,841 --> 00:12:39,530
Mr. Buchman, we
really have to go.
345
00:12:39,668 --> 00:12:41,254
You go enjoy yourself.
346
00:12:41,392 --> 00:12:42,529
I can'’t, honey...
347
00:12:42,667 --> 00:12:44,633
I'll just be here grinding
my teeth to dust.
348
00:12:44,771 --> 00:12:45,804
Schmuck! You said it.
349
00:12:45,942 --> 00:12:46,942
But, honey...
350
00:12:47,046 --> 00:12:48,632
This was a very
hostile thing to do.
351
00:12:48,770 --> 00:12:50,148
Hostile? How was that hostile?
352
00:12:50,287 --> 00:12:52,321
I'’m saying!
353
00:12:57,251 --> 00:12:59,077
Can you say "hand?:" Huh?
354
00:12:59,216 --> 00:13:00,767
Please? "Hand." Schmuck!
355
00:13:00,905 --> 00:13:02,801
Can you say "Jell-O?" Schmuck.
356
00:13:02,939 --> 00:13:04,698
Mabel! Okay, can you say
357
00:13:04,835 --> 00:13:06,869
Lillian B. Saltzman
Memorial Corridor?
358
00:13:07,007 --> 00:13:08,800
Schmuck. James?
359
00:13:08,937 --> 00:13:10,661
Keep working.
360
00:13:10,799 --> 00:13:12,351
Come on...
361
00:13:26,900 --> 00:13:27,933
Oh, hello.
362
00:13:28,071 --> 00:13:29,175
Oh, hi.
363
00:13:29,313 --> 00:13:31,071
What a beautiful baby.
364
00:13:31,209 --> 00:13:33,243
Yes. Schmuck!
365
00:13:33,381 --> 00:13:34,587
Oh, my.
366
00:13:34,725 --> 00:13:35,587
I'm sorry.
367
00:13:35,725 --> 00:13:36,760
Schmuck!
368
00:13:36,897 --> 00:13:38,518
Is there something
I can do for you?
369
00:13:38,655 --> 00:13:41,241
Uh, no, not really.
But thank you.
370
00:13:41,379 --> 00:13:42,999
Okay.
371
00:13:44,999 --> 00:13:46,689
You know... actually,
you know what?
372
00:13:46,826 --> 00:13:47,826
Yes?
373
00:13:47,964 --> 00:13:49,136
Sell me.
374
00:13:49,274 --> 00:13:50,584
I'’m sorry?
375
00:13:50,722 --> 00:13:53,480
I mean, I am not
a religious man.
376
00:13:53,618 --> 00:13:55,238
No disrespect, but you know,
377
00:13:55,376 --> 00:13:56,618
I got a business that I run,
378
00:13:56,755 --> 00:13:57,858
and I date a little bit.
379
00:13:57,996 --> 00:13:59,789
And, you know, I'm curious,
380
00:13:59,927 --> 00:14:01,582
and if you could maybe sell me,
381
00:14:01,719 --> 00:14:02,926
that would be great.
382
00:14:03,064 --> 00:14:04,892
Well, that's really
not something I do.
383
00:14:05,029 --> 00:14:06,236
Oh.
384
00:14:06,374 --> 00:14:08,477
What is your...
pardon my ignorance,
385
00:14:08,615 --> 00:14:11,062
but what is your conglomeration?
386
00:14:11,201 --> 00:14:12,993
I sort of represent everybody.
387
00:14:13,131 --> 00:14:14,614
Oh.
388
00:14:14,752 --> 00:14:16,682
That's wild, you
know, I actually...
389
00:14:16,820 --> 00:14:18,544
I've actually never prayed.
390
00:14:18,682 --> 00:14:19,888
Would you like to?
391
00:14:20,026 --> 00:14:21,543
It's all right?
392
00:14:21,681 --> 00:14:22,922
Absolutely.
393
00:14:23,059 --> 00:14:25,474
Yeah, yeah, sure. Okay, good.
394
00:14:32,093 --> 00:14:35,403
Hello, and thanks for coming.
395
00:14:37,298 --> 00:14:38,540
Uh...
396
00:14:38,678 --> 00:14:40,470
You know, I would like, please,
397
00:14:40,608 --> 00:14:42,021
if it's no trouble,
398
00:14:42,159 --> 00:14:45,159
health and happiness
for my entire family.
399
00:14:45,296 --> 00:14:50,571
World peace, please,
and an end to all suffering.
400
00:14:50,709 --> 00:14:53,846
That would be nice. Um...
401
00:14:55,191 --> 00:14:56,914
I would also like to
meet a nice woman,
402
00:14:57,052 --> 00:14:59,362
if you have an extra.
403
00:14:59,500 --> 00:15:01,776
Oh, oh, and could you please
404
00:15:01,913 --> 00:15:03,362
send some consistent pitching
405
00:15:03,499 --> 00:15:05,154
for the Yankees in the playoffs?
406
00:15:05,292 --> 00:15:09,119
And... and... and an
end to world hunger.
407
00:15:09,257 --> 00:15:10,946
Oh, and I'll tell you,
408
00:15:11,084 --> 00:15:14,221
I would love to see
South Pacificrevived again
409
00:15:14,359 --> 00:15:17,048
because, as you know,
that's one hell of a good show.
410
00:15:17,187 --> 00:15:19,083
Oh, damn. I just said hell.
411
00:15:19,220 --> 00:15:21,909
Oh, crap. I just said damn.
412
00:15:22,047 --> 00:15:23,771
This is not easy.
413
00:15:23,909 --> 00:15:25,426
Uh, what else? What else?
414
00:15:25,564 --> 00:15:27,701
Oh, an end to disease,
415
00:15:27,839 --> 00:15:30,873
uh, the return of
candy cigarettes?
416
00:15:33,183 --> 00:15:34,803
I guess...
417
00:15:34,941 --> 00:15:36,390
I guess that's about it.
418
00:15:36,527 --> 00:15:37,665
Schmuck!
419
00:15:37,803 --> 00:15:39,665
Oh, yeah. Mabel.
420
00:15:39,802 --> 00:15:42,147
You know, you'd get me
out of a major doghouse
421
00:15:42,284 --> 00:15:44,526
if you could clean
up Mabel's mouth.
422
00:15:44,663 --> 00:15:46,663
Yeah. That's it.
423
00:15:46,801 --> 00:15:48,387
Okay, thank you.
424
00:15:48,525 --> 00:15:51,180
So, uh, hallelujah.
425
00:15:51,317 --> 00:15:53,351
Signing off.
426
00:15:53,489 --> 00:15:55,419
I rejoice in your house.
427
00:15:55,557 --> 00:15:57,385
Thou have a nice day.
428
00:15:57,523 --> 00:16:00,005
Happy trails to you.
429
00:16:00,143 --> 00:16:01,625
Smoke 'em if you got 'em.
430
00:16:01,763 --> 00:16:02,763
Hang on.
431
00:16:02,797 --> 00:16:04,038
Excuse me, help me out here.
432
00:16:04,177 --> 00:16:05,590
How do I end one
of these things?
433
00:16:05,728 --> 00:16:07,037
That was fine.
434
00:16:07,176 --> 00:16:08,589
Yeah, really?
435
00:16:12,002 --> 00:16:13,622
How did it go? Is he okay?
436
00:16:13,760 --> 00:16:15,622
He should be
coming out of it soon.
437
00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:17,621
Was everything
routine? Any surprises,
438
00:16:17,759 --> 00:16:18,897
any complications?
439
00:16:19,035 --> 00:16:21,069
Step away from
the patient, please.
440
00:16:23,413 --> 00:16:25,862
I'm sorry, but you
can't come in yet.
441
00:16:25,999 --> 00:16:27,930
But when he wakes
up, I'll be sure to tell him
442
00:16:28,068 --> 00:16:29,205
how much you cared.
443
00:16:29,343 --> 00:16:30,894
Uh, Diane...
444
00:16:31,032 --> 00:16:32,756
Is it Diane?
445
00:16:32,894 --> 00:16:34,377
Yes. Come here.
446
00:16:34,515 --> 00:16:35,515
Ow!
447
00:16:35,653 --> 00:16:37,308
All right. There you go.
448
00:16:46,788 --> 00:16:48,201
Sweetie?
449
00:16:53,304 --> 00:16:54,476
Ew.
450
00:17:30,468 --> 00:17:31,779
Ow!
451
00:17:46,189 --> 00:17:48,189
Oh, my god. Don't ever die.
452
00:17:52,395 --> 00:17:54,739
Give me my Romeo.
453
00:17:56,118 --> 00:17:57,600
And when he shall die,
454
00:17:57,738 --> 00:18:00,668
take him and cut
him out in little stars
455
00:18:00,806 --> 00:18:03,082
and make the face
of heaven so fine
456
00:18:03,220 --> 00:18:05,012
that all the world
will be in love
457
00:18:05,151 --> 00:18:06,874
with night.
458
00:18:07,012 --> 00:18:09,184
Did I ever tell
you I played Juliet
459
00:18:09,322 --> 00:18:10,701
in the fifth grade?
460
00:18:10,839 --> 00:18:12,356
I did.
461
00:18:12,494 --> 00:18:15,287
Opposite Steven Palumbo's Romeo.
462
00:18:15,425 --> 00:18:17,631
Oy. What an actor he was.
463
00:18:17,769 --> 00:18:19,733
He started crying
during my monologue
464
00:18:19,871 --> 00:18:21,319
when he was supposed to be dead,
465
00:18:21,457 --> 00:18:23,354
because he said I
was leaning on his arm.
466
00:18:26,284 --> 00:18:28,284
Oh, my god. Don't ever die.
467
00:18:30,731 --> 00:18:32,110
I have so much more to tell you,
468
00:18:32,248 --> 00:18:33,868
and I'm not
interested in telling it
469
00:18:34,006 --> 00:18:35,316
to anyone else.
470
00:18:35,454 --> 00:18:37,627
And I'm not saying
I'd be helpless.
471
00:18:37,764 --> 00:18:41,488
I mean, I'm bright and
fairly good with money.
472
00:18:41,626 --> 00:18:44,659
I mean, I guess I'm cute, right?
473
00:18:46,383 --> 00:18:49,072
You would say, "What,
are you kidding me?
474
00:18:49,211 --> 00:18:51,693
You, my little friend,
are a perfect example
475
00:18:51,830 --> 00:18:53,657
of beautiful."
476
00:18:53,795 --> 00:18:55,932
And so, I am.
477
00:18:57,278 --> 00:18:59,898
'Cause I am nothing more
or less than what I see
478
00:19:00,035 --> 00:19:02,380
in your eyes when
you look at me.
479
00:19:04,552 --> 00:19:08,034
Do you know how
long I waited for you?
480
00:19:08,172 --> 00:19:10,998
My mother used to
say I was too picky,
481
00:19:11,137 --> 00:19:12,929
or afraid of commitment
and that's why
482
00:19:13,067 --> 00:19:15,136
I was still unmarried
by the age of almost 30.
483
00:19:15,274 --> 00:19:19,307
But the truth is, I was
just looking for you.
484
00:19:20,996 --> 00:19:22,686
Do you know how close I came
485
00:19:22,824 --> 00:19:27,650
to being a narrow,
cold, mistrustful woman?
486
00:19:27,788 --> 00:19:29,478
You have given me a life
487
00:19:29,616 --> 00:19:32,029
so big and full
488
00:19:32,166 --> 00:19:34,752
and good and fun.
489
00:19:34,890 --> 00:19:36,821
I don't even know
what we do, really,
490
00:19:36,959 --> 00:19:39,407
besides clean up and complain
491
00:19:39,545 --> 00:19:41,027
and wish we were sleeping.
492
00:19:41,165 --> 00:19:42,991
But with you, somehow...
493
00:19:43,130 --> 00:19:44,646
fun.
494
00:19:46,405 --> 00:19:48,129
And I'll tell you a secret.
495
00:19:49,542 --> 00:19:51,197
When we got married,
496
00:19:51,335 --> 00:19:53,644
I couldn't imagine still
wanting to be with anyone
497
00:19:53,782 --> 00:19:55,506
all this time later.
498
00:19:56,644 --> 00:19:57,919
But I do.
499
00:19:59,334 --> 00:20:01,678
It's a miracle to me. You...
500
00:20:01,816 --> 00:20:03,711
are a miracle.
501
00:20:05,332 --> 00:20:07,263
You've made me happy,
502
00:20:07,401 --> 00:20:09,572
which is something I never, ever
503
00:20:09,710 --> 00:20:11,296
thought I'd be.
504
00:20:25,328 --> 00:20:26,706
Honey?
505
00:20:26,844 --> 00:20:28,568
Are you up?
506
00:20:29,706 --> 00:20:31,154
Sweetie?
507
00:20:33,533 --> 00:20:34,980
Diane?
508
00:20:37,670 --> 00:20:39,290
What?
509
00:20:44,875 --> 00:20:48,116
Remember, I used to
have that eye problem.
510
00:20:48,254 --> 00:20:51,529
Honey, no, you know, I
was clearing my throat,
511
00:20:51,667 --> 00:20:52,943
and it came out...
512
00:20:53,080 --> 00:20:54,391
Ga-ga-Diane.
513
00:20:54,529 --> 00:20:55,631
Oh, my ga-ga.
514
00:20:55,769 --> 00:20:58,148
No, you know
what I was thinking?
515
00:20:58,286 --> 00:21:01,320
Diane Sawyer did a piece
on hospitals, remember?
516
00:21:01,458 --> 00:21:03,974
Where you going?
Don't go, don't go.
517
00:21:04,113 --> 00:21:06,767
James, James... Oh!
518
00:21:16,868 --> 00:21:18,902
So, what I'd really
like to ask, lord,
519
00:21:19,040 --> 00:21:22,660
is why do I always
have to play a chaplain?
520
00:21:22,798 --> 00:21:25,591
I mean, I can be tough.
521
00:21:25,729 --> 00:21:27,142
Watch this.
522
00:21:27,280 --> 00:21:30,279
Fredo, you broke my heart.
523
00:21:30,417 --> 00:21:32,692
You talkin' to me?
524
00:21:32,830 --> 00:21:36,036
You can't handle the truth.
525
00:21:36,175 --> 00:21:40,139
Leave the gun,
take the cannolis.
526
00:21:40,277 --> 00:21:44,035
Get your hands off
me, you damn dirty ape!
527
00:21:44,173 --> 00:21:48,724
Soylent green is people!
528
00:21:48,862 --> 00:21:52,137
So, what do you say, lord?
529
00:21:54,894 --> 00:21:56,618
Just asking.
530
00:22:02,962 --> 00:22:04,858
Closed Captioning: Leanne Royo
35665
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