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1
00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:10,010
Court-mandated therapy.
2
00:00:10,010 --> 00:00:12,303
The family that sold their kids
at the flea market
3
00:00:12,303 --> 00:00:14,097
didn't get court-mandated therapy.
4
00:00:16,307 --> 00:00:19,102
Good afternoon. I'm Dr. Peters.
5
00:00:19,102 --> 00:00:20,895
Dr. Peters, we are not crazy.
6
00:00:21,479 --> 00:00:24,607
We don't actually use
the term "crazy" anymore.
7
00:00:24,607 --> 00:00:27,527
Though I don't know why.
It does say it all.
8
00:00:29,696 --> 00:00:32,824
Well, I just hate to waste your time.
We're really a nice, normal family.
9
00:00:33,616 --> 00:00:36,953
That's all they ever send me,
nice, normal families.
10
00:00:38,121 --> 00:00:40,040
My husband and I are separated right now,
11
00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:42,584
and there was a slight disagreement
at the custody hearing.
12
00:00:42,584 --> 00:00:45,545
Uh, the judge used the word "brawl".
13
00:00:48,548 --> 00:00:50,800
- Dr. Hart--
- Please, call me Brock.
14
00:00:50,800 --> 00:00:51,968
Brock.
15
00:00:54,220 --> 00:00:56,848
The record says you assaulted the bailiff.
16
00:00:56,848 --> 00:00:59,059
Uh, no, no. That was Cheyenne.
17
00:01:00,393 --> 00:01:04,022
She was really the one whalin' on him.
I tell ya, my girl can throw a punch.
18
00:01:05,148 --> 00:01:08,193
- Well, they were trying to throw Van out.
- And Van is--
19
00:01:08,193 --> 00:01:09,319
Cheyenne's boyfriend.
20
00:01:09,319 --> 00:01:11,780
He's the star quarterback on
the high school football team.
21
00:01:11,780 --> 00:01:12,697
Cornerback.
22
00:01:14,407 --> 00:01:15,784
Is that important right now?
23
00:01:17,494 --> 00:01:20,121
Well, one's offense, one's defense.
It's pretty important.
24
00:01:20,747 --> 00:01:24,083
He's taking us all the way to state.
Go, Wildcats. [growls]
25
00:01:26,711 --> 00:01:29,589
Brock's the assistant coach for the team.
Easy, Wildcat.
26
00:01:31,633 --> 00:01:34,427
- And you must be Jake?
- Here.
27
00:01:36,179 --> 00:01:38,056
You bit the court reporter?
28
00:01:38,264 --> 00:01:40,683
I didn't think anybody was looking.
29
00:01:43,812 --> 00:01:45,146
Well, they were.
30
00:01:47,524 --> 00:01:50,485
Okay, why don't we begin
with the custody arrangements?
31
00:01:50,485 --> 00:01:52,946
- Oh, I want to live with Dad.
- I want to stay with Mom.
32
00:01:52,946 --> 00:01:54,572
Is boot camp an option?
33
00:01:55,782 --> 00:01:57,951
Cheyenne, m-my condo's too small.
34
00:01:57,951 --> 00:02:01,079
Well, not for two people.
Look. I can cook a-and take care of you.
35
00:02:01,996 --> 00:02:03,414
- Please, Dad?
- [groans]
36
00:02:06,167 --> 00:02:07,252
All right. That's enough.
37
00:02:07,252 --> 00:02:09,504
We're gonna end this
right here and right now,
38
00:02:09,504 --> 00:02:12,090
without lawyers and without
court-appointed therapists.
39
00:02:12,924 --> 00:02:13,883
No offense.
40
00:02:14,509 --> 00:02:16,052
Hey, I get paid either way.
41
00:02:17,137 --> 00:02:18,805
It's time you move back home
42
00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:21,474
and handle this midlife crisis
the way other men do.
43
00:02:21,474 --> 00:02:24,894
So buy a red Corvette.
Take up bungee jumping.
44
00:02:24,894 --> 00:02:27,438
Pierce something.
Whatever it takes. I don't care.
45
00:02:29,023 --> 00:02:30,108
Reba...
46
00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:33,736
Barbra Jean and I are getting married.
47
00:02:34,237 --> 00:02:36,865
What? Oh, no.
48
00:02:36,865 --> 00:02:39,409
You're not stupid enough
to throw away a 20-year marriage
49
00:02:39,409 --> 00:02:42,537
over a dental hygienist
with two first names.
50
00:02:42,537 --> 00:02:46,332
- We should discuss this later.
- No, we're gonna discuss it right now.
51
00:02:46,332 --> 00:02:48,960
Reba, I have to marry her.
52
00:02:48,960 --> 00:02:51,462
Oh, please. "Have to"?
53
00:02:51,462 --> 00:02:54,591
The only reason you'd have to marry her
is if you'd gone off and...
54
00:02:59,137 --> 00:03:01,055
- Oh, my God.
- What?
55
00:03:01,055 --> 00:03:02,682
Here we go.
56
00:03:03,683 --> 00:03:04,767
Oh, my God.
57
00:03:04,767 --> 00:03:06,728
- Daddy, how could you?
- What?
58
00:03:06,728 --> 00:03:07,979
Barbra Jean's pregnant!
59
00:03:07,979 --> 00:03:10,231
I thought Cheyenne was pregnant.
60
00:03:11,900 --> 00:03:13,192
- Wha--
- Shut up, Jake!
61
00:03:13,192 --> 00:03:16,154
- Back off. He's just a stupid kid.
- I'm not stupid.
62
00:03:16,154 --> 00:03:19,032
She left the pregnancy test
in the trash can.
63
00:03:19,032 --> 00:03:21,326
- Oh, my God!
- I'm gonna kill you!
64
00:03:21,326 --> 00:03:23,912
- No, no, no!
- [shouting]
65
00:03:24,537 --> 00:03:28,207
♪ Who I am is who I want to be ♪
66
00:03:28,207 --> 00:03:32,712
{\an8}♪ I'm a survivor ♪
67
00:03:41,346 --> 00:03:42,722
{\an8}How could this happen?
68
00:03:42,722 --> 00:03:45,266
{\an8}I don't know.
How do these things ever happen?
69
00:03:45,266 --> 00:03:47,810
{\an8}Two people work together,
the X-ray room was dark--
70
00:03:47,810 --> 00:03:49,479
{\an8}I was talking to them!
71
00:03:52,357 --> 00:03:55,151
{\an8}We had the sex talk. I drew pictures
72
00:03:55,151 --> 00:03:56,945
{\an8}with blue and pink arrows!
73
00:03:58,363 --> 00:04:00,657
{\an8}We thought you could only
get pregnant one day a month.
74
00:04:00,657 --> 00:04:01,574
{\an8}[both] What?
75
00:04:01,574 --> 00:04:04,202
{\an8}Yeah, so you could have sex,
like, 30 times in a month...
76
00:04:04,202 --> 00:04:05,870
{\an8}and only get pregnant once, right?
77
00:04:08,331 --> 00:04:11,334
{\an8}The only reason you're alive
is 'cause you can play football.
78
00:04:12,585 --> 00:04:15,129
{\an8}You can get pregnant
the first time you have sex,
79
00:04:15,129 --> 00:04:16,214
{\an8}most days of the month,
80
00:04:16,214 --> 00:04:19,425
{\an8}standing up, sitting down,
and in a hotel hot tub.
81
00:04:26,349 --> 00:04:28,685
And what about safe sex? Condoms? Disease?
82
00:04:28,685 --> 00:04:31,187
- We don't have to worry about that.
- [both] Why not?
83
00:04:31,813 --> 00:04:35,191
{\an8}Because it was the first time,
for both of us.
84
00:04:35,191 --> 00:04:39,195
{\an8}[chuckles] Cheyenne!
85
00:04:39,195 --> 00:04:42,115
That's what embarrasses you
in this situation?
86
00:04:43,574 --> 00:04:46,452
- You know, at least we're in love.
- Oh, please.
87
00:04:46,452 --> 00:04:47,495
How can you say that?
88
00:04:47,495 --> 00:04:50,206
You were the one who told me not to
have sex unless I was in love.
89
00:04:50,206 --> 00:04:53,459
- Well, what'd you tell her that for?
- Oh, gee, I don't know.
90
00:04:53,459 --> 00:04:56,379
I guess I had this crazy idea
that if two people loved each other
91
00:04:56,379 --> 00:04:58,381
and one put the other
through dental school,
92
00:04:58,381 --> 00:04:59,674
they'd stay together forever!
93
00:04:59,674 --> 00:05:02,719
Again with the dental school.
That was 25 years ago.
94
00:05:02,719 --> 00:05:05,221
You know, Barbra Jean
never mentions dental school.
95
00:05:05,221 --> 00:05:06,764
She wasn't alive then!
96
00:05:08,808 --> 00:05:11,811
Can you both just-- just stop it? Ugh!
97
00:05:14,480 --> 00:05:16,524
Van, have you told your parents?
98
00:05:16,524 --> 00:05:17,483
About what?
99
00:05:19,986 --> 00:05:22,322
Oh! Oh, about that. No.
100
00:05:22,822 --> 00:05:25,700
Well, go home and tell 'em.
I'm sure they'd like to know.
101
00:05:26,284 --> 00:05:28,995
We'll get together in the morning
and figure this whole thing out.
102
00:05:38,171 --> 00:05:40,840
- Sorry, Coach.
- Shake it off. Big game Saturday.
103
00:05:43,676 --> 00:05:45,136
[mouthing inaudibly]
104
00:05:50,683 --> 00:05:54,062
So, when Daddy marries Barbra Jean,
what am I supposed to call her, anyway?
105
00:05:54,062 --> 00:05:55,897
You're not supposed to call her anything.
106
00:05:55,897 --> 00:05:58,316
When you see her at the Walmart,
just point to her and say,
107
00:05:58,316 --> 00:06:00,109
"There's the woman that stole my daddy."
108
00:06:03,696 --> 00:06:05,281
Can I ask you something?
109
00:06:05,281 --> 00:06:08,701
I knew this was gonna happen. Okay.
110
00:06:09,118 --> 00:06:11,329
Honey, I know this has been
very confusing for you,
111
00:06:11,329 --> 00:06:12,914
so ask me anything you want.
112
00:06:13,498 --> 00:06:15,875
Can Bret come over and play on Saturday?
113
00:06:19,295 --> 00:06:21,130
Have I mentioned you're my favorite?
114
00:06:23,299 --> 00:06:24,258
Of course he can.
115
00:06:24,258 --> 00:06:26,803
Now, go get ready for bed,
and I'll come tuck you in later.
116
00:06:32,016 --> 00:06:32,892
Kyra...
117
00:06:34,519 --> 00:06:37,105
The pictures, the arrows,
118
00:06:37,105 --> 00:06:38,731
they were clear, weren't they?
119
00:06:39,649 --> 00:06:42,652
You don't have to worry about me, Mom.
I know all about birth control.
120
00:06:42,652 --> 00:06:44,112
Oh, you do, do you?
121
00:06:44,737 --> 00:06:46,989
Well, at what age is it
appropriate for a young lady
122
00:06:46,989 --> 00:06:48,407
to become sexually active?
123
00:06:48,407 --> 00:06:49,325
Forty.
124
00:06:53,329 --> 00:06:54,997
Have I mentioned you're my favorite?
125
00:07:04,465 --> 00:07:07,677
- Honey, you have to eat.
- Mom, this is my fourth sandwich.
126
00:07:09,428 --> 00:07:11,055
Cheyenne, we have to talk about this.
127
00:07:11,055 --> 00:07:13,141
Look, I know. I just--
I'm really tired right now.
128
00:07:13,141 --> 00:07:15,518
I just need to be alone.
Could we talk tomorrow?
129
00:07:16,102 --> 00:07:17,895
Sure. Sure.
130
00:07:18,312 --> 00:07:19,147
Thanks.
131
00:07:26,404 --> 00:07:27,238
Van?
132
00:07:29,782 --> 00:07:31,284
- Yeah?
- Ohh!
133
00:07:32,702 --> 00:07:33,619
Get outta there!
134
00:07:34,912 --> 00:07:37,832
Why is it we're the only house in Texas
without a gun?
135
00:07:39,500 --> 00:07:42,628
My parents kicked me out.
I told them everything and they said
136
00:07:42,628 --> 00:07:45,423
they didn't want anything to do with me
or Cheyenne or the baby.
137
00:07:46,090 --> 00:07:49,135
But I don't feel that way.
I want to do the right thing.
138
00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:51,846
At what point was hiding under the bed
the right thing?
139
00:07:52,305 --> 00:07:54,223
When I realized the ladder fell down.
140
00:07:55,683 --> 00:07:56,809
Look, we were just talking.
141
00:07:56,809 --> 00:07:59,520
We don't jump into bed and do it
every time we see each other.
142
00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:01,063
I can vouch for that.
143
00:08:01,063 --> 00:08:03,691
Look, look. I love your daughter.
144
00:08:03,691 --> 00:08:06,903
And I'm not staying away,
no matter what you or my parents say.
145
00:08:07,570 --> 00:08:10,740
I was gonna do this in private,
but I don't care anymore.
146
00:08:10,740 --> 00:08:12,617
Oh, no, not the knee thing.
147
00:08:14,035 --> 00:08:16,370
Cheyenne, will you marry me?
148
00:08:16,370 --> 00:08:18,498
- Oh, my God.
- Now,
149
00:08:19,040 --> 00:08:23,419
I know this is just an earring,
but I'm gonna get you a real ring someday.
150
00:08:23,419 --> 00:08:25,588
My grandmother can't live forever.
151
00:08:28,799 --> 00:08:30,259
I'm not far behind her.
152
00:08:46,859 --> 00:08:49,695
- [knocking]
- Brock?
153
00:08:50,112 --> 00:08:52,615
No, Barbra Jean.
154
00:08:54,575 --> 00:08:57,954
- You're gonna be a grandma!
- You're gonna marry a grandpa.
155
00:09:01,332 --> 00:09:03,251
I know. I can't wait.
156
00:09:04,001 --> 00:09:06,921
Oh, I am so glad
that we can still be friends.
157
00:09:06,921 --> 00:09:10,383
You know, I was afraid that the baby
might change the way you feel about me.
158
00:09:10,383 --> 00:09:13,511
No, I feel the same way
about you as I always have.
159
00:09:15,179 --> 00:09:17,848
Oh, I just feel like giving you
a great big hug.
160
00:09:17,848 --> 00:09:18,975
Fight it.
161
00:09:20,184 --> 00:09:24,021
Reba, what is this?
Cheyenne is not gettin' married!
162
00:09:24,021 --> 00:09:27,733
I'm not gonna stand by and let my daughter
throw her life away for that punk.
163
00:09:27,733 --> 00:09:30,444
- You love that punk.
- I... do not.
164
00:09:30,987 --> 00:09:34,448
You watch him play football every weekend
just like he's your own son.
165
00:09:34,448 --> 00:09:36,867
Sometimes I think
you like him more than your own son.
166
00:09:36,867 --> 00:09:40,037
- She is not gettin' married.
- I have to agree with Brock here.
167
00:09:40,037 --> 00:09:43,165
Two wrongs don't make a right
in the eyes of our Lord.
168
00:09:43,165 --> 00:09:44,208
Barbra Jean.
169
00:09:45,793 --> 00:09:49,088
At your church, do you sit with the rest
of the congregation,
170
00:09:49,088 --> 00:09:51,716
or is there a special pew for adulterers?
171
00:09:53,259 --> 00:09:54,885
Well, actually, I sit with the choir.
172
00:09:57,096 --> 00:09:58,973
- B.J., would you mind--
- B.J.?
173
00:09:58,973 --> 00:10:01,642
- Yes, it's short for--
- I know what it's short for.
174
00:10:03,227 --> 00:10:06,105
Barbra Jean, don't you have some
instruments to sterilize?
175
00:10:06,105 --> 00:10:07,023
- No.
- Yes.
176
00:10:07,023 --> 00:10:08,149
Yes.
177
00:10:10,693 --> 00:10:11,819
Good luck with that.
178
00:10:14,280 --> 00:10:15,197
Thanks.
179
00:10:15,740 --> 00:10:18,701
Look, they're too young to get married.
I mean, they have no money,
180
00:10:18,701 --> 00:10:20,620
and where in the world
are they gonna live?
181
00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:22,413
With me. Where else?
182
00:10:22,413 --> 00:10:24,999
That way they'll have a chance
of finishing high school.
183
00:10:26,208 --> 00:10:29,086
Look. I've been up all night long
discussing their options with them.
184
00:10:29,086 --> 00:10:30,254
They've made up their mind.
185
00:10:30,254 --> 00:10:32,048
If we try to stop them,
they'll just elope.
186
00:10:32,048 --> 00:10:33,257
Unbelievable.
187
00:10:33,257 --> 00:10:36,510
And we've set the wedding date
for Saturday at the house.
188
00:10:36,510 --> 00:10:40,056
- Just family and a few friends.
- Wha--You want witnesses?
189
00:10:40,056 --> 00:10:42,433
I mean, isn't this where we send her off
190
00:10:42,433 --> 00:10:45,019
to visit a "friend" for nine months?
191
00:10:48,564 --> 00:10:51,233
Hey, just because she's pregnant and 17
192
00:10:51,233 --> 00:10:55,154
doesn't mean we can't give our little girl
a nice, tasteful wedding.
193
00:10:55,988 --> 00:10:57,281
Do you hear yourself?
194
00:10:59,158 --> 00:11:02,703
I can't believe that you want to celebrate
this embarrassment!
195
00:11:03,287 --> 00:11:06,082
Well, what are you and B.J. planning?
196
00:11:06,082 --> 00:11:08,542
I don't know. Something with doves.
197
00:11:09,251 --> 00:11:10,920
Oh, but that's different!
198
00:11:11,587 --> 00:11:14,215
- Ceremony's at 3:00. Bring ice.
- I'm not coming.
199
00:11:14,215 --> 00:11:15,883
See you Saturday. Wear your blue suit.
200
00:11:15,883 --> 00:11:18,094
- It's not gonna happen.
- Lots of ice.
201
00:11:34,568 --> 00:11:35,403
Hi.
202
00:11:36,112 --> 00:11:37,071
Hi, sweetie.
203
00:11:37,822 --> 00:11:39,657
You know, you can wear this too someday.
204
00:11:39,657 --> 00:11:43,077
Divorce and a teen pregnancy.
Some track record.
205
00:11:45,663 --> 00:11:47,873
I'm trying to decide
on the hors d'oeuvres.
206
00:11:47,873 --> 00:11:50,668
Oysters on the half shell
or king crab claws?
207
00:11:50,668 --> 00:11:53,671
I don't think anyone's gonna
leave this wedding talking about the food.
208
00:11:55,339 --> 00:11:58,342
We got the tuxes.
Orange with white cummerbunds.
209
00:11:58,342 --> 00:12:00,177
- Go, Wildcats!
- What?
210
00:12:00,177 --> 00:12:03,514
Gotcha! Got her!
I usually don't get people.
211
00:12:04,473 --> 00:12:06,517
Oh, Mom, have you talked to Dad?
Is he coming?
212
00:12:06,517 --> 00:12:08,561
- He's coming.
- Is he okay with all this?
213
00:12:08,561 --> 00:12:11,147
He's delighted. He's bringing the ice.
214
00:12:12,731 --> 00:12:14,567
You ready to try on my wedding dress?
215
00:12:16,068 --> 00:12:18,279
Actually, I was gonna
talk to you about that.
216
00:12:18,279 --> 00:12:21,824
I was out shopping,
and I found this incredible dress.
217
00:12:22,575 --> 00:12:23,826
Isn't it perfect?
218
00:12:25,411 --> 00:12:28,456
But you always said
you wanted to wear my wedding dress.
219
00:12:28,456 --> 00:12:31,417
I know, but that's when
I thought I'd be old when I got married.
220
00:12:32,418 --> 00:12:35,379
- This one's just more me.
- And so practical.
221
00:12:35,379 --> 00:12:38,757
Just add some elastic, and in nine months
you can wear it to the prom.
222
00:12:39,967 --> 00:12:42,928
So what are you saying?
You don't want to wear my wedding dress?
223
00:12:43,512 --> 00:12:46,932
Well, yours is-- It's just so traditional.
And I really like this one.
224
00:12:46,932 --> 00:12:49,894
Well, you can wear yours underneath mine.
Tell you what.
225
00:12:49,894 --> 00:12:52,646
I'm gonna go hang it in your room
and you can think about it, okay?
226
00:12:52,646 --> 00:12:54,940
- Okay.
- So I talked to my parents.
227
00:12:54,940 --> 00:12:57,276
They're not coming.
But I did get us a honeymoon.
228
00:12:57,276 --> 00:13:00,112
Three nights
at my uncle's beach house in Galveston.
229
00:13:00,112 --> 00:13:01,906
He just said not to open up the cellar.
230
00:13:04,033 --> 00:13:05,451
Oh! We're gonna miss school.
231
00:13:05,451 --> 00:13:07,786
Can you write us a permission
slip for our honeymoon?
232
00:13:07,786 --> 00:13:09,872
Oh, good Lord.
233
00:13:09,872 --> 00:13:12,958
"Honeymoon" and "permission slip"
all in the same sentence.
234
00:13:15,127 --> 00:13:17,922
Getting married is so much fun.
We should have done this junior year.
235
00:13:17,922 --> 00:13:19,173
[giggles]
236
00:13:19,757 --> 00:13:21,467
No, you were smart to wait.
237
00:13:26,096 --> 00:13:27,014
Mom?
238
00:13:27,431 --> 00:13:29,808
Oh, my little girl's getting married.
239
00:13:29,808 --> 00:13:32,228
You sure you don't want
to wear my wedding dress?
240
00:13:32,228 --> 00:13:34,396
Look, where's Dad? Why isn't he here yet?
241
00:13:34,396 --> 00:13:35,814
- He'll be here.
- Are you sure?
242
00:13:35,814 --> 00:13:38,567
- I'm sure.
- Here are your flowers, Mrs. H.
243
00:13:38,567 --> 00:13:42,071
- Right here.
- Oh, Cheyenne, you look hot!
244
00:13:42,863 --> 00:13:45,783
Whoo! I told you
it was better without a bra.
245
00:13:46,784 --> 00:13:48,744
Are you aware I'm her mother?
246
00:13:50,746 --> 00:13:52,665
Uh, our first guests have arrived.
247
00:13:54,208 --> 00:13:56,835
Oh, Bret! I'm sorry.
Jake can't come out and play today.
248
00:13:56,835 --> 00:13:59,004
But you said he could come over.
249
00:14:00,673 --> 00:14:03,676
My mom said to tell you
I throw up if I eat olives.
250
00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:05,928
- Then don't eat any.
- He already did.
251
00:14:07,972 --> 00:14:10,182
Go get a bucket and follow him around.
252
00:14:10,182 --> 00:14:13,394
Better yet, go call his mother.
See if she can bring some ice.
253
00:14:13,978 --> 00:14:16,522
- Ice? I thought Dad was bringing the ice.
- Backup ice.
254
00:14:16,522 --> 00:14:19,066
Oh, I just knew it.
My own father isn't coming to my wedding.
255
00:14:19,066 --> 00:14:21,485
- Fine. I'm not going to his.
- Cheyenne!
256
00:14:21,485 --> 00:14:23,112
- [bell dings]
- Oh.
257
00:14:23,112 --> 00:14:24,238
[phone ringing]
258
00:14:24,238 --> 00:14:26,782
Oh. Hello?
259
00:14:27,908 --> 00:14:30,578
- Go tend to her!
- No prob, Mom.
260
00:14:32,246 --> 00:14:35,207
Yes, the wedding's still on. Uh-huh.
Kyra, please help.
261
00:14:36,125 --> 00:14:38,627
Yeah, sure.
Yeah, we're looking forward to it.
262
00:14:38,627 --> 00:14:40,462
Use the potholders. Yes.
263
00:14:40,838 --> 00:14:42,965
Uh-huh. Ooh!
264
00:14:43,257 --> 00:14:44,216
Sure!
265
00:14:45,301 --> 00:14:47,595
Oh, damn, damn, damn!
266
00:14:47,595 --> 00:14:49,555
Oh, no, no. Not you, Reverend.
267
00:14:51,223 --> 00:14:53,559
Sure. Yeah, there's an open bar.
268
00:14:53,559 --> 00:14:54,935
Uh-huh. Bye, bye.
269
00:14:55,561 --> 00:14:58,981
- Damn! They're ruined!
- Much like our lives?
270
00:15:02,568 --> 00:15:04,695
Kyra Eleanor Hart, out!
271
00:15:04,695 --> 00:15:07,156
- Bye.
- Ohh!
272
00:15:11,201 --> 00:15:13,203
[grunts in frustration]
273
00:15:13,829 --> 00:15:14,747
[sighs]
274
00:15:23,589 --> 00:15:24,632
Ice is here.
275
00:15:30,763 --> 00:15:31,639
Hey.
276
00:15:33,390 --> 00:15:34,308
Come on.
277
00:15:35,351 --> 00:15:36,310
Ohh.
278
00:15:44,526 --> 00:15:48,155
There she is! The mother of the bride!
279
00:15:50,449 --> 00:15:53,619
You were only supposed to bring the ice!
280
00:15:54,578 --> 00:15:56,747
[Cheyenne] Get out! Get out!
281
00:15:56,747 --> 00:15:58,832
- [Van] Hold on. Would you please--
- Get out!
282
00:15:58,832 --> 00:16:00,376
- Ow! You hurt my hair!
- Get out!
283
00:16:00,376 --> 00:16:02,002
- [Cheyenne grunts]
- What's going on?
284
00:16:02,002 --> 00:16:04,338
Oh! The wedding's off!
I never want to see him again!
285
00:16:04,338 --> 00:16:05,297
Bye-bye. Bye-bye.
286
00:16:05,297 --> 00:16:07,466
I can't believe you're jealous of a game.
287
00:16:07,466 --> 00:16:10,344
I cannot believe
that you care more about football than me.
288
00:16:10,344 --> 00:16:11,261
I never said that.
289
00:16:11,261 --> 00:16:13,222
- I love you both the same.
- Oh!
290
00:16:13,931 --> 00:16:16,058
But you more. Way more.
291
00:16:16,058 --> 00:16:19,019
Will somebody please tell me
what the hell is going on?
292
00:16:19,019 --> 00:16:21,480
Oh, Brock, "heck," please.
293
00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:23,232
- He's gonna play tonight.
- What?
294
00:16:23,232 --> 00:16:26,193
Mm-hmm. He's gonna spend
our wedding night at a football game.
295
00:16:26,193 --> 00:16:28,821
Coach said he's gonna
throw me off the team if I miss the game.
296
00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:31,323
I can't believe he can't
excuse you just this once.
297
00:16:31,323 --> 00:16:32,992
Well, I'm really good.
298
00:16:35,494 --> 00:16:38,831
Brock, you're an assistant coach.
Can't you get him excused just one game?
299
00:16:39,832 --> 00:16:41,166
He's really good.
300
00:16:42,418 --> 00:16:45,254
It's their honeymoon!
What the hell's wrong with you?
301
00:16:45,254 --> 00:16:47,506
-"Heck."
- [both] Shut up!
302
00:16:48,215 --> 00:16:51,135
Look, why can't y'all go on your honeymoon
after the game?
303
00:16:51,135 --> 00:16:53,137
- That's what I told her!
- Oh!
304
00:16:54,346 --> 00:16:56,724
- Oh!
- The cake!
305
00:16:56,724 --> 00:16:58,684
[all shouting]
306
00:17:00,686 --> 00:17:02,021
Die, jockstrap!
307
00:17:03,814 --> 00:17:06,191
Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!
308
00:17:07,109 --> 00:17:09,361
This is a wedding! You're ruining it!
309
00:17:09,987 --> 00:17:11,321
You've ruined everything.
310
00:17:12,197 --> 00:17:14,783
We were supposed to grow old together!
311
00:17:35,471 --> 00:17:36,388
[knocking]
312
00:17:40,559 --> 00:17:42,102
How did this happen?
313
00:17:43,020 --> 00:17:46,899
I'm a senior. I'm...
I'm co-captain of the drill team.
314
00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:48,942
[sniffles]
315
00:17:48,942 --> 00:17:51,445
I should be practicing
the new kick-line routine
316
00:17:51,445 --> 00:17:52,780
for tonight's halftime show,
317
00:17:52,780 --> 00:17:56,158
not getting married and having a baby.
318
00:17:58,744 --> 00:18:00,704
I am so off the drill team.
319
00:18:03,749 --> 00:18:05,417
I'm so out of the Junior League.
320
00:18:07,252 --> 00:18:10,005
- Sorry.
- Oh, that's all right.
321
00:18:10,923 --> 00:18:13,300
I'd have been out as soon
as they got wind of
322
00:18:13,300 --> 00:18:14,760
the court-mandated therapy.
323
00:18:16,637 --> 00:18:19,556
A pregnant teenage daughter
was just the icing on the cake.
324
00:18:21,266 --> 00:18:23,143
I guess your life is ruined too.
325
00:18:31,819 --> 00:18:32,653
Get up.
326
00:18:33,779 --> 00:18:35,614
What? Mom...
327
00:18:40,953 --> 00:18:42,079
Tell me what you see.
328
00:18:43,956 --> 00:18:45,290
I'll tell you what I see.
329
00:18:46,125 --> 00:18:48,210
- A couple of losers.
- Mom--
330
00:18:48,210 --> 00:18:49,753
Well, what do you call two people
331
00:18:49,753 --> 00:18:51,713
who are going to mourn
the rest of their lives
332
00:18:51,713 --> 00:18:53,882
'cause things didn't
turn out the way they planned?
333
00:18:55,342 --> 00:18:56,301
Losers.
334
00:18:58,095 --> 00:19:00,097
Time for you and me to face reality.
335
00:19:01,140 --> 00:19:03,892
You're gonna have to schedule
your life around football,
336
00:19:03,892 --> 00:19:06,478
and I'm gonna have to learn
how to get my own ice.
337
00:19:11,191 --> 00:19:13,861
Honey, what your father
and I once had is over.
338
00:19:13,861 --> 00:19:15,404
He's not coming back.
339
00:19:15,946 --> 00:19:19,867
And Barbra Jean is not gonna drown
in a giant vat of Crisco oil.
340
00:19:24,079 --> 00:19:26,456
- Mama's got a dark side.
- Yeah.
341
00:19:30,460 --> 00:19:32,337
So what are we gonna do now?
342
00:19:33,130 --> 00:19:34,506
Plot a new course.
343
00:19:34,506 --> 00:19:38,510
Just because things are different
don't mean they have to be bad.
344
00:19:40,888 --> 00:19:42,264
I'm scared.
345
00:19:46,935 --> 00:19:50,314
Good, because nothing is as frightening
346
00:19:50,314 --> 00:19:52,774
or as wonderful as becoming a mother.
347
00:19:55,861 --> 00:19:58,280
Do you think Van and I
have a shot at making it?
348
00:20:00,741 --> 00:20:01,700
It's gonna be hard.
349
00:20:04,703 --> 00:20:07,247
I will never understand
why he likes football so much anyway.
350
00:20:07,831 --> 00:20:09,208
Aw, see?
351
00:20:09,208 --> 00:20:11,251
You're sounding like
a married woman already.
352
00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:13,754
Now...
353
00:20:15,130 --> 00:20:16,548
Shall we have a wedding?
354
00:20:18,634 --> 00:20:19,635
Yeah.
355
00:20:20,844 --> 00:20:22,471
[Reba] I can fix that real easy.
356
00:20:24,306 --> 00:20:25,807
Actually, I thought it might be nice
357
00:20:25,807 --> 00:20:28,060
to have some tradition
at this wedding after all.
358
00:20:29,353 --> 00:20:31,939
Think it might be all right
if I wore your wedding dress?
359
00:20:32,731 --> 00:20:33,941
- I'd love that.
- [laughs]
360
00:20:36,944 --> 00:20:38,111
But you gotta wear a bra.
361
00:20:41,114 --> 00:20:42,241
Okay.
362
00:20:42,699 --> 00:20:44,034
- Hey, Mom?
- What?
363
00:20:44,034 --> 00:20:45,577
I hate Barbra Jean's dress.
364
00:20:46,870 --> 00:20:48,789
Have I told you you're my favorite?
365
00:20:48,789 --> 00:20:53,293
♪ When your troubles knock you down ♪
366
00:20:53,293 --> 00:20:56,338
♪ Pick yourself up off the ground ♪
367
00:20:56,338 --> 00:20:57,839
♪ And walk on ♪
368
00:20:58,632 --> 00:21:00,384
♪ Walk on ♪
369
00:21:00,801 --> 00:21:03,136
Okay, let's get a photo
of the whole family.
370
00:21:04,346 --> 00:21:05,639
♪ Walk on ♪
371
00:21:05,639 --> 00:21:07,557
♪ Oh, walk on ♪
372
00:21:08,267 --> 00:21:11,395
Don't worry about the honeymoon, Mrs. H.
I packed lots of condoms.
373
00:21:12,187 --> 00:21:15,774
♪ Walk on ♪
374
00:21:16,441 --> 00:21:19,695
♪ Nothing ever stays wrong that long ♪
375
00:21:19,695 --> 00:21:20,737
♪ Walk on ♪
376
00:21:22,739 --> 00:21:24,741
[closing theme music playing]
29281
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