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1
00:00:11,800 --> 00:00:12,973
That cheeseburger?
2
00:00:13,663 --> 00:00:14,663
No.
3
00:00:20,079 --> 00:00:21,079
Ravioli?
4
00:00:21,493 --> 00:00:22,493
No.
5
00:00:22,907 --> 00:00:23,907
Uh-uh.
6
00:00:32,012 --> 00:00:34,599
I'm gonna go with
spinach quiche.
7
00:00:34,737 --> 00:00:35,737
Not even close.
8
00:00:36,910 --> 00:00:38,255
Baba ganoush. Ooh!
9
00:00:52,603 --> 00:00:55,190
♪ Tell me why
10
00:00:55,328 --> 00:00:57,018
♪ I love you like I do
11
00:00:57,157 --> 00:00:58,881
♪ Tell me who
12
00:00:59,018 --> 00:01:01,605
♪ Can stop my
heart as much as you
13
00:01:01,743 --> 00:01:03,882
♪ 'Cause I don't
have the answers
14
00:01:04,020 --> 00:01:05,951
♪ I don't have a plan
15
00:01:06,090 --> 00:01:08,125
♪ All I have is you, so, baby
16
00:01:08,262 --> 00:01:09,607
♪ Help me understand
17
00:01:09,745 --> 00:01:11,712
♪ What we do
18
00:01:11,850 --> 00:01:13,677
♪ You can whisper in my ear
19
00:01:13,815 --> 00:01:15,816
♪ Where we go
20
00:01:15,954 --> 00:01:18,403
♪ Who knows what
happens after here?
21
00:01:18,541 --> 00:01:20,403
♪ Let's take each other's hand
22
00:01:20,541 --> 00:01:23,749
♪ And jump into
the final frontier ♪
23
00:01:28,578 --> 00:01:31,579
I love this collar.
It's so soft and nice.
24
00:01:31,717 --> 00:01:32,717
I can't believe
25
00:01:32,820 --> 00:01:34,340
You spent that kind
of money on a coat.
26
00:01:34,407 --> 00:01:35,649
Here, put the baby right there.
27
00:01:35,787 --> 00:01:37,167
Sweetie, it's a coat.
28
00:01:37,304 --> 00:01:39,477
I'm out a-drinkin'
and a-gamblin'.
29
00:01:39,615 --> 00:01:41,477
You know, it's an outer garment
30
00:01:41,615 --> 00:01:43,582
I'm using to protect
myself from the elements.
31
00:01:43,720 --> 00:01:44,880
Well, I think it's indulgent.
32
00:01:44,961 --> 00:01:46,341
Do you know how much money
33
00:01:46,479 --> 00:01:47,628
it's gonna cost to get
a college education
34
00:01:47,652 --> 00:01:49,617
by the time Mabel's 18?
35
00:01:49,755 --> 00:01:51,515
Yeah, and by the way,
I bought some water
36
00:01:51,653 --> 00:01:53,067
to sustain my body weight.
37
00:01:53,204 --> 00:01:54,244
I hope that was all right.
38
00:01:54,343 --> 00:01:55,723
You know what I'm talking about.
39
00:01:55,860 --> 00:01:57,378
You're not exactly
careful with money.
40
00:01:57,516 --> 00:01:59,586
I got 50 bucks that
says that's crazy.
41
00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:03,690
Look what we found, $100.
42
00:02:03,827 --> 00:02:04,827
Oh, my god!
43
00:02:04,932 --> 00:02:06,105
Where'd you find $100?
44
00:02:06,243 --> 00:02:07,690
Right here in the restaurant,
45
00:02:07,828 --> 00:02:09,070
right on the way in.
46
00:02:09,208 --> 00:02:10,633
Did you ask if it
belonged to anybody?
47
00:02:10,657 --> 00:02:12,140
Sure, but, they all said no.
48
00:02:12,278 --> 00:02:15,072
A very high quality of
personage you get in here.
49
00:02:15,210 --> 00:02:16,590
Yeah. How'd you pick this place?
50
00:02:16,728 --> 00:02:17,762
We flipped a coin.
51
00:02:17,900 --> 00:02:18,935
You're kidding?
52
00:02:19,073 --> 00:02:20,601
No, just flipped a coin.
We narrowed it down.
53
00:02:20,625 --> 00:02:22,360
It was either this or a
Mexican place on third avenue
54
00:02:22,384 --> 00:02:25,247
That-that has burritos
the size of your head.
55
00:02:26,454 --> 00:02:28,937
Hi, I'm Steven. I'll
be your server today.
56
00:02:29,075 --> 00:02:30,179
What'll it be today?
57
00:02:30,800 --> 00:02:32,972
Muffins or, breadsticks?
58
00:02:33,766 --> 00:02:35,284
Ooh! A choice. Um,
59
00:02:35,422 --> 00:02:36,904
Do you want-
60
00:02:37,042 --> 00:02:38,640
Hey, you know what, here's
how we settle it. Very simple,
61
00:02:38,664 --> 00:02:40,864
watch what we do. Muffins
or, breadstick, you're saying.
62
00:02:40,974 --> 00:02:41,975
Watch this.
63
00:02:42,768 --> 00:02:43,768
Muffins.
64
00:02:43,872 --> 00:02:45,148
Muffins it is.
65
00:02:45,286 --> 00:02:47,149
This is-ha, ha-
this is so liberating.
66
00:02:47,287 --> 00:02:49,563
It is. You just flip a
coin, make a decision.
67
00:02:49,701 --> 00:02:50,908
You can't live that way.
68
00:02:51,046 --> 00:02:52,599
Let's go to Atlantic city. What?
69
00:02:52,736 --> 00:02:54,288
Yeah, to gamble the $100.
70
00:02:54,426 --> 00:02:55,668
Oh, no, no, no. I don't know.
71
00:02:55,806 --> 00:02:58,082
Oh, come on, Burt, we're
playing with house money.
72
00:02:58,220 --> 00:03:00,979
House money? Where-where did
you learn an expression like that?
73
00:03:01,118 --> 00:03:04,670
We have riverboat night
at the community center.
74
00:03:04,808 --> 00:03:06,688
Let's flip the coin to
decide if they should go.
75
00:03:06,809 --> 00:03:08,430
Heads we go, tails we stay.
76
00:03:08,567 --> 00:03:10,430
All right, here we go. And,
77
00:03:10,568 --> 00:03:11,688
Atlantic city, you're going.
78
00:03:12,190 --> 00:03:13,190
Whoo!
79
00:03:13,224 --> 00:03:14,673
Hey, everybody.
80
00:03:14,811 --> 00:03:18,018
I'd like you to meet my friend
Molly and her son Logan.
81
00:03:18,156 --> 00:03:20,432
What, you're dating
a woman with a child?
82
00:03:22,744 --> 00:03:25,089
You know, mom, they're
actually at the table.
83
00:03:26,296 --> 00:03:28,021
Ira and I are just old friends.
84
00:03:28,159 --> 00:03:30,228
That's right. Hey, make
yourself comfortable, kid.
85
00:03:30,366 --> 00:03:33,574
Paulie, do me a favor.
Ask Logan a math question.
86
00:03:33,711 --> 00:03:34,712
A math question?
87
00:03:34,850 --> 00:03:36,481
Yeah, yeah, I'm serious.
Go ahead. Anything.
88
00:03:36,505 --> 00:03:42,438
All right, uh, what-what
is, uh, 418 times 642?
89
00:03:42,576 --> 00:03:45,129
268,356.
90
00:03:47,784 --> 00:03:48,784
That's right.
91
00:03:50,544 --> 00:03:51,544
Muffins.
92
00:03:51,613 --> 00:03:52,854
Thank you very much.
93
00:03:52,992 --> 00:03:54,234
Okay, all right,
94
00:03:54,372 --> 00:03:55,590
What? just a second, everybody.
95
00:03:55,614 --> 00:03:56,614
Look at my muffin.
96
00:03:56,648 --> 00:03:57,648
What about it?
97
00:03:57,752 --> 00:04:00,063
My muffin looks like Madonna.
98
00:04:01,546 --> 00:04:02,581
It does not.
99
00:04:02,719 --> 00:04:03,719
From Evita?
100
00:04:04,236 --> 00:04:05,236
Oh, my god!
101
00:04:09,720 --> 00:04:10,789
I don't see it.
102
00:04:10,927 --> 00:04:11,928
From Evita.
103
00:04:12,307 --> 00:04:13,376
Oh, yeah.
104
00:04:14,101 --> 00:04:15,653
I mean, this is wild.
105
00:04:15,791 --> 00:04:18,653
We flip a coin and pick a
restaurant where you guys find $100,
106
00:04:18,791 --> 00:04:21,482
we flip it again to pick
muffins over breadsticks,
107
00:04:21,620 --> 00:04:24,276
and you end up with a muffin
that looks exactly like Madonna.
108
00:04:24,414 --> 00:04:26,035
Oh, scary.
109
00:04:26,173 --> 00:04:27,173
Paul?
110
00:04:28,242 --> 00:04:29,346
Paul Buchman.
111
00:04:29,484 --> 00:04:31,036
Yeah, yeah, Lou,
how are you doing?
112
00:04:31,174 --> 00:04:32,174
How are you?
113
00:04:32,312 --> 00:04:33,795
It's been a while.
How you been, sir?
114
00:04:33,933 --> 00:04:35,658
Great, great. I'm working over
115
00:04:35,796 --> 00:04:38,486
At the television news
magazine show Hard Editionnow.
116
00:04:38,624 --> 00:04:39,694
Oh, is that right?
117
00:04:39,831 --> 00:04:40,831
Yeah, Hard Edition.
118
00:04:40,866 --> 00:04:42,004
Good, good, good.
119
00:04:42,143 --> 00:04:43,832
Just started over
at Hard Edition.
120
00:04:43,970 --> 00:04:47,661
Trying to get my first segment
produced over there at Hard Edition.
121
00:04:48,351 --> 00:04:49,765
Good, good for you.
122
00:04:50,283 --> 00:04:51,283
Okay.
123
00:04:54,524 --> 00:04:56,387
So, uh, you know my wife Jamie.
124
00:04:56,525 --> 00:04:58,250
Oh, for heaven's
sake. I'm so sorry.
125
00:04:58,387 --> 00:04:59,507
Lou Bonaparte, Hard Edition.
126
00:04:59,561 --> 00:05:00,630
Yeah.
127
00:05:00,768 --> 00:05:01,768
My folks.
128
00:05:01,871 --> 00:05:02,991
Lou Bonaparte, Hard Edition.
129
00:05:03,044 --> 00:05:04,838
You know, Paul, uh,
130
00:05:04,975 --> 00:05:06,562
I couldn't help but,
overhear you saying
131
00:05:06,700 --> 00:05:08,563
you had miraculously
received a muffin
132
00:05:08,701 --> 00:05:10,701
That looks exactly
like the Madonna?
133
00:05:10,839 --> 00:05:12,977
No, not the Madonna,
Madonna the singer.
134
00:05:13,115 --> 00:05:14,116
Oh.
135
00:05:15,047 --> 00:05:16,047
I don't see it.
136
00:05:16,116 --> 00:05:17,116
From Evita.
137
00:05:17,254 --> 00:05:18,392
I see it!
138
00:05:19,772 --> 00:05:21,393
It's miraculous, Paul.
139
00:05:21,531 --> 00:05:24,083
This-this could be a
sign from the almighty.
140
00:05:25,291 --> 00:05:26,646
Do you understand
what we're saying?
141
00:05:26,670 --> 00:05:28,395
It's Madonna the singer.
142
00:05:28,533 --> 00:05:31,085
Exactly. Not Celine
Dion or, Lou Rawls
143
00:05:31,224 --> 00:05:33,914
Or, someone whose name has no
religious underpinning whatsoever.
144
00:05:34,051 --> 00:05:35,051
Madonna, Paul.
145
00:05:36,328 --> 00:05:38,673
And you say you haven't had
a segment produced yet, huh?
146
00:05:40,571 --> 00:05:41,674
Lou, there's-
147
00:05:41,812 --> 00:05:43,374
Paul, what are your
plans for the muffin?
148
00:05:43,398 --> 00:05:44,985
Um, um,
149
00:05:45,123 --> 00:05:46,986
plans? I don't know
that we have plans, Lou.
150
00:05:47,124 --> 00:05:49,721
A little butter, have some coffee
with the muffin. That's about it.
151
00:05:49,745 --> 00:05:52,814
Oh, that muffin has Hard
Edition written all over it,
152
00:05:52,952 --> 00:05:54,205
and I'm telling you,
we'll pay you for it.
153
00:05:54,229 --> 00:05:55,509
We'll pay you handsomely for it,
154
00:05:55,539 --> 00:05:57,413
for the exclusive rights
to a story on the muffin.
155
00:05:57,437 --> 00:05:58,506
Handsomely?
156
00:05:58,644 --> 00:06:00,092
Embarrassingly handsomely.
157
00:06:00,231 --> 00:06:04,955
Wow! Enough maybe to sock away
for, oh, our daughter's education?
158
00:06:05,093 --> 00:06:07,242
Look at that? What, I'm against
education for my daughter?
159
00:06:07,266 --> 00:06:09,440
No, I'm saying he's
gonna pay us handsomely.
160
00:06:09,578 --> 00:06:10,978
Yeah, 'cause they
have no integrity.
161
00:06:11,992 --> 00:06:14,130
So you're worried about
the integrity of the muffin?
162
00:06:14,268 --> 00:06:15,268
Do you want-
163
00:06:18,304 --> 00:06:19,925
Here's how we
settle it. Watch this.
164
00:06:20,063 --> 00:06:21,063
Ready?
165
00:06:23,270 --> 00:06:27,478
Can you tell us, was there any
special way the coin was chosen?
166
00:06:29,376 --> 00:06:31,238
No, Lou, there really was not.
167
00:06:31,376 --> 00:06:34,515
Um, I needed a quarter
168
00:06:34,653 --> 00:06:35,963
'cause I was doing laundry,
169
00:06:36,101 --> 00:06:37,594
and we were trying
to pick a restaurant,
170
00:06:37,618 --> 00:06:40,205
so I just reached
into the change bowl.
171
00:06:42,033 --> 00:06:43,724
Fantastic. So,
172
00:06:46,207 --> 00:06:49,243
so, in a way, this is
the coin of destiny.
173
00:06:51,243 --> 00:06:53,346
Lou, what would I
have to say to you
174
00:06:53,484 --> 00:06:54,764
to make this less of a big deal?
175
00:06:54,829 --> 00:06:57,176
No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no.
176
00:06:57,313 --> 00:07:00,037
I'm with you, I'm with you.
For want of a load of laundry
177
00:07:00,176 --> 00:07:02,522
the coin of destiny was born.
178
00:07:02,659 --> 00:07:06,557
And from that coin of
destiny, an epic muffin.
179
00:07:06,694 --> 00:07:08,074
And from the epic muffin-
180
00:07:08,212 --> 00:07:10,592
All right, both of
you, just stop it.
181
00:07:10,730 --> 00:07:12,040
Why can't you just believe?
182
00:07:13,420 --> 00:07:15,180
Excuse me. Lou, you
think you pretty much
183
00:07:15,318 --> 00:07:16,478
have everything you need now?
184
00:07:16,559 --> 00:07:18,388
Nope. Tip of the
iceberg, my friend.
185
00:07:18,525 --> 00:07:19,525
Okay.
186
00:07:19,595 --> 00:07:21,422
Hey. Hi
187
00:07:21,560 --> 00:07:23,296
Paulie, can I talk to
you for a minute? Sure.
188
00:07:23,320 --> 00:07:24,760
Yes, and when
you're talking to Paul,
189
00:07:24,837 --> 00:07:25,986
you can talk to Hard Edition.
190
00:07:26,010 --> 00:07:27,355
If you don't mind, just Paul.
191
00:07:27,493 --> 00:07:28,493
All right, sir.
192
00:07:29,735 --> 00:07:30,735
What's up?
193
00:07:30,838 --> 00:07:32,632
Let me ask you something.
194
00:07:32,770 --> 00:07:34,323
What did you think of Logan?
195
00:07:34,460 --> 00:07:35,667
Nice kid, like him, nice.
196
00:07:35,805 --> 00:07:37,012
Yeah, that's all?
197
00:07:37,150 --> 00:07:38,875
Like a human abacus, but-
198
00:07:40,462 --> 00:07:42,358
Just nice, nice kid. Why?
199
00:07:42,496 --> 00:07:44,221
I- I think he might be my son.
200
00:07:45,773 --> 00:07:47,291
I'm sorry. What, what, what?
201
00:07:47,429 --> 00:07:50,222
Yeah, yeah, I mean, Molly, she's
not sure who Logan's father is, see.
202
00:07:50,360 --> 00:07:51,947
And he's 12 years old,
203
00:07:52,085 --> 00:07:55,741
and it was about 12 years and 9
months ago that Molly and I were together.
204
00:07:55,879 --> 00:07:57,719
In my life, I've never
heard you mention Molly.
205
00:07:57,776 --> 00:07:59,121
It was just a one-time thing.
206
00:07:59,260 --> 00:08:00,845
It was during "hands
across America."
207
00:08:04,192 --> 00:08:06,468
You mean, during-during
the actual demonstration?
208
00:08:06,606 --> 00:08:07,951
Yeah.
209
00:08:08,089 --> 00:08:09,209
Okay, see, here's the thing.
210
00:08:09,331 --> 00:08:11,011
You were just supposed
to be holding hands.
211
00:08:12,779 --> 00:08:16,677
Come on, you're standing with a
cute girl in a ditch holding hands.
212
00:08:16,815 --> 00:08:18,678
Any moron could close that deal.
213
00:08:21,368 --> 00:08:23,334
Hey, how come you just
got one kind of mustard?
214
00:08:24,127 --> 00:08:25,611
Because we're cavemen.
215
00:08:25,749 --> 00:08:28,405
What-what-what-what are
you gonna do about this now?
216
00:08:28,543 --> 00:08:30,888
I'm gonna go down after
this and get a blood test.
217
00:08:31,577 --> 00:08:33,371
Wow! You know what?
218
00:08:33,509 --> 00:08:34,549
I'll bet you it's nothing.
219
00:08:34,682 --> 00:08:35,865
I'll bet you you'll
be free and clear.
220
00:08:35,889 --> 00:08:37,579
Yeah, but, Paulie,
here's the thing.
221
00:08:37,717 --> 00:08:40,373
I'm not sure I want it
to be free and clear.
222
00:08:40,510 --> 00:08:41,590
What are you talking about?
223
00:08:41,615 --> 00:08:43,339
I mean I like this
kid. I really do.
224
00:08:43,477 --> 00:08:46,823
And it's strange. I feel like a
connection with him. I cant explain it.
225
00:08:46,961 --> 00:08:49,306
Ha ha. Ira, Ira,
Ira, Ira, Ira, Ira.
226
00:08:49,444 --> 00:08:50,444
What?
227
00:08:51,306 --> 00:08:52,789
Let me explain something to you.
228
00:08:52,927 --> 00:08:55,514
Fatherhood is a very
complicated thing.
229
00:08:55,652 --> 00:08:57,928
You don't just walk
into a relationship.
230
00:08:58,066 --> 00:08:59,446
There's a lot of-
there's building-
231
00:08:59,584 --> 00:09:01,206
Cut it out, will ya?
232
00:09:02,102 --> 00:09:03,447
What do you think? I know that.
233
00:09:03,585 --> 00:09:06,103
You think this is some-
some goofball impulse?
234
00:09:06,241 --> 00:09:09,173
I am profoundly moved by the notion
that this could by my flesh and blood,
235
00:09:09,311 --> 00:09:12,208
and I'm deeply, deeply
drawn to him as a parent.
236
00:09:12,346 --> 00:09:14,623
Okay, okay, I'm, I'm sorry.
237
00:09:20,934 --> 00:09:21,934
Hey, Marvin.
238
00:09:22,003 --> 00:09:23,083
I want to talk to the coin.
239
00:09:23,211 --> 00:09:25,694
Oh, for god's sake, Marvin.
240
00:09:25,832 --> 00:09:29,282
Ask the coin if I should call
my ex-girlfriend one more time.
241
00:09:31,454 --> 00:09:33,834
Marvin, it's-it's a coin.
242
00:09:33,972 --> 00:09:36,041
No, it's not. It's
the coin of destiny.
243
00:09:37,559 --> 00:09:38,697
It's a quarter.
244
00:09:39,456 --> 00:09:40,836
You used to be a lot wackier.
245
00:09:44,388 --> 00:09:46,508
All right, Marv, okay,
yes, it is the coin of destiny,
246
00:09:46,630 --> 00:09:49,458
but, it's the coin of
very small destiny.
247
00:09:49,596 --> 00:09:51,839
You know, it's the coin of
muffins versus breadsticks.
248
00:09:51,976 --> 00:09:54,770
It is not the coin
of life decisions.
249
00:09:54,908 --> 00:09:55,908
Thanks, Paul.
250
00:09:55,977 --> 00:09:57,219
Oh, honey.
251
00:09:57,357 --> 00:09:58,885
All right, all right,
Marvin, Marvin, all right.
252
00:09:58,909 --> 00:10:01,013
How many times have
you called her already?
253
00:10:01,150 --> 00:10:02,461
Uh,
254
00:10:02,599 --> 00:10:03,738
That one doesn't count,
255
00:10:04,324 --> 00:10:05,462
18.
256
00:10:06,669 --> 00:10:08,152
Yikes!
257
00:10:08,291 --> 00:10:11,533
Okay, Marvin, the coin feels
you should seek counseling.
258
00:10:13,671 --> 00:10:14,913
Flip it, please?
259
00:10:15,051 --> 00:10:16,200
All right, all right, all right.
260
00:10:16,224 --> 00:10:17,603
Heads you don't call her,
261
00:10:17,741 --> 00:10:19,328
and tails, give her a call.
262
00:10:19,466 --> 00:10:21,086
Heads! So definitely
the answer is
263
00:10:21,225 --> 00:10:22,226
Don't call her.
264
00:10:22,363 --> 00:10:23,604
Flip it again.
265
00:10:24,847 --> 00:10:25,847
Heads.
266
00:10:25,916 --> 00:10:26,916
Flip it again.
267
00:10:28,606 --> 00:10:29,606
Heads.
268
00:10:29,744 --> 00:10:31,055
Flip it again.
269
00:10:31,193 --> 00:10:33,113
Marvin, don't do this to
yourself. Just go ahead.
270
00:10:33,573 --> 00:10:34,987
Heads.
271
00:10:35,125 --> 00:10:38,022
Okay, all right,
let's test the coin.
272
00:10:38,677 --> 00:10:40,782
Let's see, ask it
273
00:10:40,919 --> 00:10:44,885
If I'm a 5'1" Swedish woman.
274
00:10:48,542 --> 00:10:49,611
Tails. Wow!
275
00:10:49,749 --> 00:10:50,784
Stupid coin.
276
00:10:50,922 --> 00:10:53,129
Hey, hey, hey,
don't insult the coin.
277
00:10:53,267 --> 00:10:55,957
Note to self. Coin may
be bigger story than muffin.
278
00:10:57,406 --> 00:10:59,751
Lou, I'll give you $100
to just get out of here.
279
00:10:59,889 --> 00:11:01,442
Yeah. Just throw
our money around.
280
00:11:02,718 --> 00:11:03,718
Hello.
281
00:11:03,856 --> 00:11:04,856
Paulie?
282
00:11:04,959 --> 00:11:05,959
Hey, pop. Where are you?
283
00:11:05,994 --> 00:11:07,305
Atlantic city.
284
00:11:07,443 --> 00:11:08,660
Atlantic city?
Winning or, losing?
285
00:11:08,684 --> 00:11:09,858
Winning!
286
00:11:09,995 --> 00:11:10,995
Oh, really? How much?
287
00:11:11,271 --> 00:11:13,892
$9,500.
288
00:11:14,755 --> 00:11:17,273
You guys won $9,500?
289
00:11:17,411 --> 00:11:18,929
Yeah, yeah. Oh, we have to go.
290
00:11:19,067 --> 00:11:20,274
All right. You know what?
291
00:11:20,412 --> 00:11:21,412
Go and enjoy it.
292
00:11:21,481 --> 00:11:22,516
Okay. Bye.
293
00:11:22,654 --> 00:11:25,137
That is the coin of destiny.
294
00:11:25,275 --> 00:11:26,275
Stop it.
295
00:11:26,344 --> 00:11:27,389
You still don't believe it?
296
00:11:27,413 --> 00:11:28,413
No, I don't believe it.
297
00:11:28,482 --> 00:11:29,482
Fine. Do me a fav-
298
00:11:30,311 --> 00:11:31,311
How ya doin'?
299
00:11:31,380 --> 00:11:32,725
All right. Listen.
Do me a favor.
300
00:11:32,863 --> 00:11:34,503
Ask that coin a
question for me, will you?
301
00:11:35,139 --> 00:11:36,174
Okay. What?
302
00:11:36,313 --> 00:11:37,726
Ask that coin
303
00:11:37,864 --> 00:11:41,521
If my husband Paul ordered
$30 worth of dinner last night
304
00:11:41,658 --> 00:11:42,944
to be delivered here
while I was sleeping,
305
00:11:42,968 --> 00:11:44,928
even though there was
plenty of food in the house.
306
00:11:49,074 --> 00:11:50,074
Excuse us one second.
307
00:11:50,177 --> 00:11:51,247
No, no, no, no, no.
308
00:11:51,385 --> 00:11:52,385
I want you to hear this.
309
00:11:52,454 --> 00:11:53,592
Go ahead, ask it.
310
00:11:53,730 --> 00:11:54,730
I would never do that.
311
00:11:54,765 --> 00:11:56,455
Ask the coin.
312
00:11:56,593 --> 00:11:57,914
I don't have to ask the coin,
'Cause I know I would never do that.
313
00:11:57,938 --> 00:11:59,604
Go ahead, ask it. I
don't have to ask it...
314
00:11:59,628 --> 00:12:00,835
And at the same time,
315
00:12:00,973 --> 00:12:02,743
ask it if you left half an
egg roll on the nightstand.
316
00:12:02,767 --> 00:12:03,802
Huh.
317
00:12:06,836 --> 00:12:08,116
I left an egg roll on the night-
318
00:12:08,181 --> 00:12:09,221
You're just talking crazy.
319
00:12:09,252 --> 00:12:10,975
Ask it, ask it. Just ask it.
320
00:12:11,113 --> 00:12:12,390
Okay, fine.
321
00:12:12,528 --> 00:12:13,631
Alright?
322
00:12:13,769 --> 00:12:14,942
The coin is wrong.
323
00:12:15,080 --> 00:12:16,356
Uh-huh. Ask it if you bought
324
00:12:16,494 --> 00:12:17,908
the Fleetwood mac laser disc
325
00:12:18,046 --> 00:12:19,978
even though you already
own the CD boxed set.
326
00:12:23,945 --> 00:12:25,531
I didn't-A,
327
00:12:25,669 --> 00:12:27,290
and two-they're very
different because-
328
00:12:27,428 --> 00:12:28,601
Ask it, ask it, ask it.
329
00:12:28,739 --> 00:12:29,739
Okay.
330
00:12:30,670 --> 00:12:31,774
The coin's wrong again.
331
00:12:31,911 --> 00:12:34,016
Ask it if you've been
making calls to brokers
332
00:12:34,154 --> 00:12:35,634
to get floor seats
for the knick game.
333
00:12:35,741 --> 00:12:36,741
What, are you tailing me?
334
00:12:36,775 --> 00:12:38,051
Ask it.
335
00:12:41,569 --> 00:12:42,856
All right. It's the
coin of destiny.
336
00:12:42,880 --> 00:12:43,914
Thank you.
337
00:12:44,052 --> 00:12:45,412
Now do you believe?
Yes, I believe.
338
00:12:52,676 --> 00:12:53,917
Look at that.
339
00:12:54,055 --> 00:12:55,263
It's unbelievable.
340
00:12:55,401 --> 00:12:56,401
It looks like
341
00:12:56,504 --> 00:12:57,860
it's gonna jump
right up off the plate
342
00:12:57,884 --> 00:13:00,747
and sing Don't cry
for me, Argentina.
343
00:13:00,885 --> 00:13:02,230
Hey, everybody.
344
00:13:02,367 --> 00:13:04,023
Ah, the Oracle and Mrs. Oracle.
345
00:13:04,161 --> 00:13:05,161
Ooh.
346
00:13:05,230 --> 00:13:06,472
Lou, you're hovering again.
347
00:13:06,610 --> 00:13:08,300
Not hovering. Investigating.
348
00:13:08,438 --> 00:13:10,542
Okay, Paulie, the question is,
349
00:13:10,680 --> 00:13:13,301
Should I buy 500 shares
of Eastman Kodak?
350
00:13:13,439 --> 00:13:15,337
Let's take a look, shall we?
351
00:13:16,440 --> 00:13:17,440
Call your broker.
352
00:13:17,544 --> 00:13:18,682
I love that coin.
353
00:13:20,992 --> 00:13:23,166
Hello. House of Coin.
354
00:13:23,304 --> 00:13:25,477
Hey. Fran, hi. How you doin'?
355
00:13:26,408 --> 00:13:29,236
Oh, I understand.
Yeah, okay. Hold on.
356
00:13:29,374 --> 00:13:31,961
Okay. That's yes
on proposition 108,
357
00:13:33,479 --> 00:13:35,031
and apparently,
358
00:13:35,169 --> 00:13:36,445
no on the bond issue.
359
00:13:37,790 --> 00:13:38,859
Happy to help.
360
00:13:38,997 --> 00:13:40,557
That's what we do
here at house of coin.
361
00:13:42,584 --> 00:13:43,964
I've never been
an Oracle before,
362
00:13:44,102 --> 00:13:45,447
but, I gotta say, I like it.
363
00:13:46,689 --> 00:13:47,689
Okay.
364
00:13:48,689 --> 00:13:49,793
All right.
365
00:13:50,966 --> 00:13:52,759
How about this?
366
00:13:52,897 --> 00:13:55,863
Ask your coin if
calling my ex-girlfriend
367
00:13:56,001 --> 00:13:58,347
is not something I should do.
368
00:13:58,485 --> 00:14:00,209
Should I highlight my hair?
369
00:14:00,348 --> 00:14:01,727
Boxers or, briefs?
370
00:14:01,864 --> 00:14:03,140
No, no, no. You guys,
371
00:14:03,279 --> 00:14:05,245
the coin is not a toy.
In fact, give me that.
372
00:14:05,383 --> 00:14:07,314
No, we are not
gonna play with it
373
00:14:07,452 --> 00:14:09,004
like a bunch of silly children.
374
00:14:10,867 --> 00:14:11,947
I want you all to sit there
375
00:14:12,040 --> 00:14:13,440
and think about
how you're behaving.
376
00:14:22,284 --> 00:14:23,284
Oh, my god.
377
00:14:26,871 --> 00:14:28,354
Oh, my god. Oh, my god.
378
00:14:29,562 --> 00:14:30,596
Oh, my god.
379
00:14:35,217 --> 00:14:36,770
Oh, my god.
380
00:15:02,363 --> 00:15:04,224
I'm searching for
the coin of destiny.
381
00:15:06,433 --> 00:15:07,433
I see.
382
00:15:10,192 --> 00:15:11,572
So, to me,
383
00:15:11,710 --> 00:15:13,606
the coin means hope,
384
00:15:13,744 --> 00:15:16,711
hope that Louanne
really does love me
385
00:15:16,849 --> 00:15:19,263
and maybe one day
386
00:15:19,401 --> 00:15:22,229
there will be joy
in my heart again.
387
00:15:26,575 --> 00:15:27,575
Hey.
388
00:15:27,645 --> 00:15:28,955
Hey. Are we glad to see you.
389
00:15:29,092 --> 00:15:30,266
Ask the coin,
390
00:15:30,404 --> 00:15:32,197
tonight, should we
have Chinese or, Italian?
391
00:15:32,922 --> 00:15:34,336
What are we really saying,
392
00:15:34,473 --> 00:15:35,715
that we're actually incapable
393
00:15:35,853 --> 00:15:37,302
of making a decision on our own?
394
00:15:38,509 --> 00:15:39,789
Pretty much at this point, yeah.
395
00:15:40,786 --> 00:15:42,131
So, what, flip the coin.
396
00:15:42,269 --> 00:15:43,452
I don't know that
we should be rely-
397
00:15:43,476 --> 00:15:44,521
Flip the coin. Flip the coin.
398
00:15:44,545 --> 00:15:45,994
Heads, Chinese. Tails, Italian.
399
00:15:48,028 --> 00:15:49,028
Chinese.
400
00:15:50,167 --> 00:15:51,306
There you go.
401
00:15:51,444 --> 00:15:52,685
Another decision made nicely.
402
00:15:52,823 --> 00:15:53,823
Hello.
403
00:15:54,271 --> 00:15:55,823
Hey, pop.
404
00:15:55,961 --> 00:15:57,686
Well, let me ask.
Hang on a second.
405
00:15:57,824 --> 00:16:00,273
Sweetie. It's my
dad. Red or, black?
406
00:16:00,411 --> 00:16:01,756
What?
407
00:16:01,894 --> 00:16:04,181
They're at the roulette wheel.
Atlantic city. Red or, black?
408
00:16:04,205 --> 00:16:05,412
The roulette wheel?
409
00:16:05,550 --> 00:16:07,654
Red or, black?
Flip flip flip flip.
410
00:16:10,620 --> 00:16:11,655
Red.
411
00:16:11,793 --> 00:16:12,896
Red it is.
412
00:16:13,863 --> 00:16:14,863
You got it.
413
00:16:15,001 --> 00:16:16,281
I got another
call. I'll see you.
414
00:16:16,897 --> 00:16:17,897
Hello.
415
00:16:18,002 --> 00:16:19,864
Hey, Mark. How you doin'?
416
00:16:20,002 --> 00:16:21,416
Let me ask. Hold on a second.
417
00:16:21,554 --> 00:16:23,727
Sweetie, it's mark.
Corned beef or, brisket?
418
00:16:24,692 --> 00:16:25,692
Corned beef.
419
00:16:25,797 --> 00:16:28,556
CB. You need any
help with the side dish?
420
00:16:28,693 --> 00:16:30,522
No. He's okay
with the side dish.
421
00:16:31,660 --> 00:16:33,316
Yeah. Enjoy. Got another call.
422
00:16:34,350 --> 00:16:36,971
Hello. Hi. Who's this?
423
00:16:37,524 --> 00:16:39,731
Millie and Barney Kraft.
424
00:16:39,869 --> 00:16:41,801
Oh, you met my folks
in Atlantic city there.
425
00:16:42,973 --> 00:16:44,146
Oh, isn't that nice?
426
00:16:44,284 --> 00:16:45,457
What is it?
427
00:16:45,595 --> 00:16:47,156
I'll be happy to help.
Hold on one second.
428
00:16:47,180 --> 00:16:48,905
Sweetie, station
wagon or, a minivan?
429
00:16:51,975 --> 00:16:53,182
Minivan, but I don't think-
430
00:16:53,321 --> 00:16:54,700
It's the minivan.
431
00:16:54,838 --> 00:16:55,976
Happy to help.
432
00:16:57,632 --> 00:16:59,598
With that coin and one
of those multi-line phones,
433
00:16:59,736 --> 00:17:00,977
I could be the king of France.
434
00:17:03,461 --> 00:17:05,462
Hey, look who's here.
Come on in, come on in.
435
00:17:05,600 --> 00:17:06,669
Hey, got any food?
436
00:17:06,807 --> 00:17:09,186
It's okay. Kitchen's
right through there.
437
00:17:09,325 --> 00:17:10,773
I thought we'd come over,
438
00:17:10,911 --> 00:17:12,290
spend a little time with Logan,
439
00:17:12,428 --> 00:17:15,395
let him establish those
all-important family bonds.
440
00:17:15,533 --> 00:17:16,912
Ira, don't you think
441
00:17:17,050 --> 00:17:18,786
You're getting a little
ahead of yourself here?
442
00:17:18,810 --> 00:17:20,706
I'm telling you. I
am the kid's father.
443
00:17:20,844 --> 00:17:22,879
If you don't believe
me, forget this blood test.
444
00:17:23,017 --> 00:17:24,087
Just ask the coin.
445
00:17:24,224 --> 00:17:25,776
Oh, I don't think we wanna use-
446
00:17:25,914 --> 00:17:26,959
Why don't you just ask the coin?
447
00:17:26,983 --> 00:17:27,995
You want me to flip my own coin?
448
00:17:28,019 --> 00:17:29,295
Flip your own coin.
449
00:17:30,881 --> 00:17:31,985
That's not gonna work.
450
00:17:32,122 --> 00:17:33,951
This is the only
coin that does that.
451
00:17:34,089 --> 00:17:35,331
This is the coin that does it.
452
00:17:35,469 --> 00:17:38,124
I think DNA testing edges
out the coin in this case.
453
00:17:38,262 --> 00:17:39,401
Just flip it.
454
00:17:39,539 --> 00:17:40,780
This is exciting.
455
00:17:40,918 --> 00:17:42,397
Heads-I'm the
father. Tails-I'm not.
456
00:17:43,367 --> 00:17:44,574
And the answer is,
457
00:17:47,886 --> 00:17:48,886
Heads.
458
00:17:49,851 --> 00:17:50,989
Wow.
459
00:17:51,680 --> 00:17:52,783
Wow.
460
00:17:53,059 --> 00:17:54,059
Wow.
461
00:17:55,266 --> 00:17:56,301
Wow.
462
00:17:57,508 --> 00:17:58,715
I'm a dad.
463
00:17:58,853 --> 00:18:01,820
This coin has never been
tested at all to any degree.
464
00:18:01,958 --> 00:18:04,303
Hey, Paulie. How come you
got only one kind of mustard?
465
00:18:06,476 --> 00:18:07,718
That's my boy!
466
00:18:09,960 --> 00:18:12,236
I love that you and I
have the coin of destiny.
467
00:18:12,374 --> 00:18:15,582
Sweetie, this is not
the coin of destiny.
468
00:18:15,719 --> 00:18:18,065
Hey, are you losing
faith in the coin?
469
00:18:18,203 --> 00:18:20,376
I accidentally put
the coin of destiny
470
00:18:20,514 --> 00:18:21,963
Into the washing machine.
471
00:18:23,308 --> 00:18:25,273
Well, that's not a
good use of the coin,
472
00:18:25,412 --> 00:18:26,412
now, is it?
473
00:18:27,516 --> 00:18:28,758
Gee. Really?
474
00:18:28,896 --> 00:18:30,068
Well, go get it back.
475
00:18:30,206 --> 00:18:31,517
Yes, all right, I'll do that.
476
00:18:31,654 --> 00:18:33,137
Good luck.
477
00:18:33,275 --> 00:18:35,655
It's in here with
5,000 other quarters.
478
00:18:36,069 --> 00:18:37,104
Oh.
479
00:18:37,622 --> 00:18:39,139
When was this?
480
00:18:39,277 --> 00:18:41,105
Before, when I went
down to do the laundry.
481
00:18:42,002 --> 00:18:43,451
So we've been dispensing advice
482
00:18:43,588 --> 00:18:46,003
based on a false
coin of destiny.
483
00:18:46,140 --> 00:18:47,314
This is what I'm saying.
484
00:18:47,452 --> 00:18:49,383
Well, that's just irresponsible.
485
00:18:49,521 --> 00:18:51,177
You're the one
begging me to flip it.
486
00:18:51,315 --> 00:18:53,488
Well, I didn't think you'd
be so flippant with it.
487
00:18:54,971 --> 00:18:56,143
Idea for follow-up-
488
00:18:56,281 --> 00:18:57,523
Paul and Jamie a year later.
489
00:19:02,524 --> 00:19:03,593
Who is it?
490
00:19:03,731 --> 00:19:05,732
It's us, Burt and
Sylvia Buchman!
491
00:19:05,870 --> 00:19:07,698
Your Irate parents.
492
00:19:07,836 --> 00:19:08,974
What do you mean, Irate?
493
00:19:09,112 --> 00:19:10,595
Give me that coin.
494
00:19:10,733 --> 00:19:11,768
Why?
495
00:19:11,906 --> 00:19:14,734
We want to stamp
it and smoosh it
496
00:19:14,872 --> 00:19:16,390
And hurt it and bend it-
497
00:19:16,528 --> 00:19:18,494
I get the idea. What happened?
498
00:19:18,632 --> 00:19:20,080
Black. Black happened.
499
00:19:20,218 --> 00:19:23,322
21 roulette wheels
in a row, all black.
500
00:19:23,460 --> 00:19:25,012
Thank you, coin.
501
00:19:26,599 --> 00:19:29,359
Wow. Well, the
coin is speechless.
502
00:19:29,497 --> 00:19:32,738
The coin doesn't know
what to, what to say.
503
00:19:32,876 --> 00:19:34,498
Hello. Hey, Mark.
504
00:19:34,636 --> 00:19:35,916
What do you mean,
food poisoning?
505
00:19:38,257 --> 00:19:39,809
Oh, that sounds-you know what?
506
00:19:39,947 --> 00:19:41,147
Just call us when you're done.
507
00:19:44,396 --> 00:19:46,466
There's a man who
wishes he had brisket.
508
00:19:48,018 --> 00:19:49,329
Hey, Marvin. What... Hi.
509
00:19:49,467 --> 00:19:51,709
Hey, everybody.
510
00:19:51,847 --> 00:19:54,606
I'd like to introduce
my fiancée Louanne.
511
00:19:56,158 --> 00:19:57,469
Your fiancée?
512
00:19:57,606 --> 00:19:59,814
I finally thought, screw
the coin of destiny,
513
00:19:59,952 --> 00:20:01,367
and I called her.
514
00:20:02,297 --> 00:20:05,229
I just was so impressed
by his persistence.
515
00:20:05,368 --> 00:20:08,092
19 times is the
charm, huh, guys?
516
00:20:09,230 --> 00:20:10,920
I guess so, huh?
517
00:20:11,058 --> 00:20:12,161
And Marvin's such an angel.
518
00:20:12,299 --> 00:20:13,931
He's already paid
off all my credit cards.
519
00:20:13,955 --> 00:20:15,024
Is that right?
520
00:20:15,162 --> 00:20:16,542
And he's gonna re-sod my lawn.
521
00:20:17,232 --> 00:20:18,232
That's nice of you.
522
00:20:18,301 --> 00:20:19,681
And he agreed to no sex.
523
00:20:21,888 --> 00:20:24,751
Stand back, everybody.
She's all mine.
524
00:20:26,889 --> 00:20:28,442
Possible future segment-
525
00:20:28,580 --> 00:20:29,856
Husbands without hope.
526
00:20:32,201 --> 00:20:33,201
Hey.
527
00:20:33,270 --> 00:20:34,340
Oh, what's the matter?
528
00:20:34,478 --> 00:20:37,513
Blood work came back,
and I am not the father.
529
00:20:37,651 --> 00:20:38,823
Ooh.
530
00:20:39,410 --> 00:20:40,410
Are you okay?
531
00:20:40,479 --> 00:20:41,824
Yeah, sure. It's okay.
532
00:20:41,962 --> 00:20:43,283
There's a "free Tibet" rally
down at the UN. A little later.
533
00:20:43,307 --> 00:20:44,427
I'm thinking of stopping by.
534
00:20:46,308 --> 00:20:48,170
Listen, it's a little
disappointment.
535
00:20:48,308 --> 00:20:50,792
At least no real damage
was done, you know?
536
00:20:54,793 --> 00:20:55,793
Hi.
537
00:20:55,896 --> 00:20:57,069
Here's your minivan.
538
00:20:58,587 --> 00:21:00,070
Honey, you know the Krafts.
539
00:21:10,383 --> 00:21:12,591
No one knows for sure
540
00:21:12,729 --> 00:21:14,074
which quarter in the pillowcase
541
00:21:14,212 --> 00:21:15,970
Is the coin of destiny.
542
00:21:16,108 --> 00:21:18,833
Some day, oh, maybe
some lucky fella,
543
00:21:19,489 --> 00:21:20,489
or, gal.
544
00:21:20,558 --> 00:21:21,558
Thanks a lot.
545
00:21:23,110 --> 00:21:24,490
Will find the coin
546
00:21:24,628 --> 00:21:27,180
and rediscover its
amazing powers.
547
00:21:27,318 --> 00:21:29,146
Maybe it'll be you.
548
00:21:29,284 --> 00:21:30,871
Maybe it'll be your neighbor.
549
00:21:31,802 --> 00:21:32,905
Maybe it'll be your uncle.
550
00:21:34,319 --> 00:21:36,390
Maybe it'll be your
neighbor's uncle.
551
00:21:36,528 --> 00:21:38,217
Maybe it'll be your
uncle's neighbor.
552
00:21:39,149 --> 00:21:40,529
Maybe your uncle
is your neighbor.
553
00:21:41,805 --> 00:21:43,081
Lou, if we could just...
554
00:21:43,219 --> 00:21:46,322
Or, maybe, just
maybe, It'll be me...
555
00:21:46,461 --> 00:21:48,565
Lou Bonaparte for Hard Edition.
556
00:22:38,094 --> 00:22:39,991
No one knows for sure
557
00:22:40,129 --> 00:22:41,509
which quarter in the pillowcase
558
00:22:41,646 --> 00:22:43,544
is the coin of destiny.
559
00:22:43,682 --> 00:22:46,407
Some day, oh, maybe
some lucky fella,
560
00:22:47,165 --> 00:22:48,165
or, gal.
561
00:22:48,234 --> 00:22:49,235
Thanks a lot.
562
00:22:50,786 --> 00:22:52,166
Will find the coin
563
00:22:52,304 --> 00:22:54,581
and rediscover its
amazing powers.
564
00:22:55,132 --> 00:22:56,788
Maybe it'll be you.
565
00:22:56,926 --> 00:22:58,754
Maybe it'll be your neighbor.
566
00:22:59,548 --> 00:23:00,962
Maybe it'll be your uncle.
567
00:23:02,100 --> 00:23:04,100
Maybe it'll be your
neighbor's uncle.
568
00:23:04,238 --> 00:23:06,101
Maybe it'll be your
uncle's neighbor.
569
00:23:07,032 --> 00:23:08,377
Maybe your uncle
is your neighbor.
570
00:23:09,412 --> 00:23:11,171
Lou, if we could just-
571
00:23:11,309 --> 00:23:13,999
or, maybe, just
maybe, It'll be me.
572
00:23:14,137 --> 00:23:16,655
Lou Bonaparte for Hard Edition.
38959
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