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1
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They're called The Spectrum.
2
00:00:03,760 --> 00:00:06,160
A savage stampede of cannibal women.
3
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One person's dead, another's
missing.
4
00:00:09,080 --> 00:00:10,120
Come back!
5
00:00:10,160 --> 00:00:12,040
I like your dressing gowns.
6
00:00:12,080 --> 00:00:14,760
I'm Ash.
You're pleased!
7
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You love that she likes you!
8
00:00:17,640 --> 00:00:19,280
You call us Spectrum.
9
00:00:19,320 --> 00:00:20,800
Agh!
Laura!
10
00:00:20,840 --> 00:00:22,840
Tom!
Surrender or die!
11
00:00:22,880 --> 00:00:24,720
You've got a week to decide.
12
00:00:35,480 --> 00:00:38,240
If we don't go after Spectrum,
Tom and Laura will die.
13
00:00:39,240 --> 00:00:42,440
If we split up, if we attack them,
all of us will die.
14
00:00:42,480 --> 00:00:44,760
But they took my feeble, helpless
baby!
15
00:00:44,800 --> 00:00:46,880
And Laura, but she can handle
herself.
16
00:00:46,920 --> 00:00:48,600
It's too risky. We're safe here.
17
00:00:48,640 --> 00:00:50,400
No, we're not. Spectrum are coming
back.
18
00:00:50,440 --> 00:00:52,080
Felix!
19
00:00:52,160 --> 00:00:54,080
That's kind of my stuff.
20
00:00:55,400 --> 00:00:57,480
Calmly, la! Here, here.
21
00:00:57,520 --> 00:01:00,720
Pet this sausage dog.
I'm going after my family.
22
00:01:00,760 --> 00:01:03,960
We are not throwing everything away
on a suicide mission.
23
00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:06,680
Here you go.
This is the safest place in...
24
00:01:06,720 --> 00:01:07,800
Agh!
25
00:01:13,160 --> 00:01:14,600
Jennifer! It's OK.
26
00:01:14,640 --> 00:01:16,520
Lightning never strikes twice...
27
00:01:57,440 --> 00:01:59,160
Agh!
28
00:02:00,440 --> 00:02:02,240
Get off!
Ow! Daddy!
29
00:02:02,280 --> 00:02:04,680
Laura! Laura!
30
00:02:04,720 --> 00:02:06,200
Let go!
31
00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:09,480
Daddy!
Laura!
32
00:02:09,520 --> 00:02:12,480
Food! Food!
33
00:02:26,040 --> 00:02:28,600
What about them, eh?
There's no normal people any more.
34
00:02:28,640 --> 00:02:32,120
Noticed that? No solid, three-star
guys.
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00:02:32,160 --> 00:02:36,000
Blokes who owned a biggish watch
and occasionally drank Guinness.
36
00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:38,960
Now everyone's making jewellery
out of someone else's teeth.
37
00:02:39,000 --> 00:02:42,320
I hate you! You fell in love with
Ash. What about Mummy?
38
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All right! What about your mum and
Oscar?
39
00:02:44,320 --> 00:02:47,440
I just had a few bad thoughts.
You can't punish me for that you're not God.
40
00:02:47,480 --> 00:02:48,880
Who even is God?
41
00:02:48,920 --> 00:02:51,440
Can I check with your mum
before I answer that question?
42
00:02:51,480 --> 00:02:54,320
Is this like Father Christmas-gate,
when you said he was dead?
43
00:02:54,360 --> 00:02:56,360
The North Pole melted. He's got
nowhere to go.
44
00:02:56,400 --> 00:02:58,000
He can fly away on his sleigh.
45
00:02:58,040 --> 00:03:02,880
How? To survive the radiation,
right, he's been in his toy factory for six years, minimum.
46
00:03:02,920 --> 00:03:07,000
He's eaten his flying reindeer...
and his elves and his pointless wife.
47
00:03:08,720 --> 00:03:11,880
But I was wrong cos Father Christmas
is magic.
48
00:03:11,920 --> 00:03:14,680
And magic makes anything possible.
That's right.
49
00:03:18,280 --> 00:03:19,680
Settling in?
50
00:03:19,720 --> 00:03:22,800
Why are you doing this?
Is this some kind of feminist thing?
51
00:03:22,840 --> 00:03:25,280
Does that intimidate you?
I don't know.
52
00:03:25,320 --> 00:03:27,320
Maybe you want to tame an alpha
male.
53
00:03:27,360 --> 00:03:29,480
And that alpha male is...you?
Yeah.
54
00:03:29,520 --> 00:03:31,320
I'm relatively tonk.
55
00:03:31,360 --> 00:03:34,040
I'm sexually magnetic, as we've
seen.
56
00:03:34,080 --> 00:03:36,360
I don't care who's downwind of a
fart.
57
00:03:36,400 --> 00:03:39,240
I'm 100 per cent prime rib.
58
00:03:39,280 --> 00:03:42,600
So if you're thinking of humiliating
me, think again.
59
00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:44,720
Bacon sandwich?
60
00:03:44,760 --> 00:03:46,680
Oh, God, yes! Please, pretty please!
61
00:03:46,720 --> 00:03:48,480
Ohh! Mmm!
62
00:03:48,520 --> 00:03:49,920
Go on, Dad. Hit her!
63
00:03:49,960 --> 00:03:52,480
Your dad wouldn't hit a woman.
Yes, he would.
64
00:03:52,520 --> 00:03:55,160
I wouldn't.
He hits me and Mummy all the time.
65
00:03:55,200 --> 00:03:57,240
Er...I really, really don't.
66
00:03:57,280 --> 00:03:59,160
You're such a coward.
67
00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:00,760
Urgh.
68
00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:03,680
Is that a nipple?
Eat it.
69
00:04:03,720 --> 00:04:06,720
I wanna fatten you up
just like these little piggies.
70
00:04:09,240 --> 00:04:12,440
Right, I feel like you want me
to acknowledge how creepy you sound.
71
00:04:12,480 --> 00:04:17,920
I'm a jowl girl, but I've heard
great things about this cut, the gunt.
72
00:04:17,960 --> 00:04:19,880
Or is it the gock?
73
00:04:19,920 --> 00:04:21,680
Urgh! Urgh.
74
00:04:21,720 --> 00:04:23,520
Did you just take my cannibal
cherry?
75
00:04:26,960 --> 00:04:28,960
Put something on the end of it,
yeah?
76
00:04:29,560 --> 00:04:30,720
Yeah, mate!
77
00:04:34,960 --> 00:04:36,160
Oscar!
78
00:04:36,200 --> 00:04:39,400
I am JK, King of the Gypsies!
79
00:04:39,440 --> 00:04:42,120
Is that meant to be Jeremy Kyle?
80
00:04:42,160 --> 00:04:43,600
Four kids of my own.
81
00:04:43,640 --> 00:04:47,440
Keep the livestock entertained
and the meat just falls of the bone.
82
00:04:47,480 --> 00:04:49,280
Happy pigs, Happy Meals.
83
00:04:49,320 --> 00:04:53,160
Welcome to the show.
Put something on the end of it, bruv!
84
00:04:53,200 --> 00:04:56,120
Put something on the end
of it! Put something on the end of it!
85
00:04:56,160 --> 00:04:58,720
Put something on the end of it!
Put something on the end of it!
86
00:04:58,760 --> 00:05:01,640
Put something on the end of it!
87
00:05:01,680 --> 00:05:03,680
Their tracks could go on for miles.
88
00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:05,720
Really we need transport.
89
00:05:05,760 --> 00:05:07,600
The car?
I crashed it.
90
00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:10,480
The quadbikes?
I threw them in the quarry, one by one.
91
00:05:10,520 --> 00:05:12,280
It's been a bad week.
92
00:05:12,320 --> 00:05:15,720
So where can we find a fast, agile
4x4 to slip under the radar?
93
00:05:15,760 --> 00:05:17,760
Well, there is one option.
94
00:05:21,880 --> 00:05:23,880
Oh, Susan, it's perfect.
95
00:05:27,600 --> 00:05:30,760
I found some petrol in the boot.
I'll fill the old queen up.
96
00:05:30,800 --> 00:05:32,520
Hen nights.
97
00:05:32,560 --> 00:05:35,280
You always get stuck with the drunk
girl who goes out of her way
98
00:05:35,320 --> 00:05:39,520
to tell you why she never gives blow
jobs, the one who's hit 30 like a brick wall.
99
00:05:39,560 --> 00:05:41,160
Hen nights can't be that bad?
100
00:05:41,200 --> 00:05:44,040
You've never had a naked butler
dip his balls in your pudding.
101
00:05:44,080 --> 00:05:45,640
Ooh, pinch me!
102
00:05:45,680 --> 00:05:49,040
I've found the mother load.
Upmarket perry and a boxful of knickers.
103
00:05:51,520 --> 00:05:54,040
Randal! Come on!
They're edible.
104
00:05:56,640 --> 00:06:00,440
I knew that. Yeah, I'm a gastronome,
that's why I was smelling them.
105
00:06:00,480 --> 00:06:03,320
"Ooh, what a bouquet!" is what I was
implying.
106
00:06:03,360 --> 00:06:06,080
Next stop: revenge, ladies.
107
00:06:06,480 --> 00:06:09,240
Put your foot down.
Laura's out there somewhere.
108
00:06:12,800 --> 00:06:15,360
Let's put some meat on the bone of
this story.
109
00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:16,400
Come on!
110
00:06:16,440 --> 00:06:20,000
You said that she said that you said
that she said that you said
111
00:06:20,040 --> 00:06:25,320
that she said that you said that she
had read a text message on your phone from Stephanie.
112
00:06:26,360 --> 00:06:28,040
Don't Look at me! Look at me!
113
00:06:28,080 --> 00:06:30,480
Why didn't you eat him?
Oscar's useful.
114
00:06:30,520 --> 00:06:32,160
He's charismatic.
115
00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:35,040
The lie-detector tests are in.
116
00:06:35,080 --> 00:06:38,200
Plus, we did a taste test, and he is
repulsive.
117
00:06:38,240 --> 00:06:40,400
He gave someone salmonella.
118
00:06:40,440 --> 00:06:42,520
Well, well, well, well.
119
00:06:42,560 --> 00:06:44,760
It turns out, you were lying!
120
00:06:44,800 --> 00:06:47,320
Ohh, never! Never!
121
00:06:47,360 --> 00:06:49,360
You're just a boy, Tony!
122
00:06:50,360 --> 00:06:51,800
Kill him!
Kill him!
123
00:06:54,120 --> 00:06:56,600
Put something on the end of it! This
is my show!
124
00:06:57,600 --> 00:07:00,440
My name in the title, bitches! My
show!
125
00:07:00,480 --> 00:07:02,480
The JK Kyle Show!
126
00:07:02,520 --> 00:07:06,040
Don't look at me, Tony! Look at me!
127
00:07:06,080 --> 00:07:08,560
Are you not entertained?
128
00:07:08,600 --> 00:07:09,800
Yeah!
129
00:07:18,040 --> 00:07:20,120
Where are you going?
130
00:07:20,160 --> 00:07:22,160
Just for a jog.
131
00:07:22,200 --> 00:07:24,200
Bit of cardio.
132
00:07:24,240 --> 00:07:27,320
Eating all that human man
has gone straight to my hips.
133
00:07:29,720 --> 00:07:31,720
Grab it hard
134
00:07:42,160 --> 00:07:44,160
God, I'm a terrible mother.
135
00:07:44,200 --> 00:07:46,200
No, I am.
136
00:07:46,240 --> 00:07:48,240
But it's just so hard, Stevie.
137
00:07:49,120 --> 00:07:51,120
I really admire you, babe.
138
00:07:51,160 --> 00:07:53,160
I found another bottle!
Whooo!
139
00:07:58,120 --> 00:08:00,120
Yes, we get it!
140
00:08:00,160 --> 00:08:01,960
Brap brap, Dorothy.
141
00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:04,000
Welcome to Oz.
142
00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:09,200
Stay back, Laura.
143
00:08:11,360 --> 00:08:13,680
Afraid of my trident?
It's a glorified hoe.
144
00:08:13,720 --> 00:08:15,720
Yeah, well. Speaking of hoes...
145
00:08:15,760 --> 00:08:17,920
where's yours at, fanny?
146
00:08:17,960 --> 00:08:20,080
You ain't nothing without Suze.
Oh, yeah?
147
00:08:20,120 --> 00:08:22,320
What's to stop me winning the trust
of your prisoners
148
00:08:22,360 --> 00:08:25,760
and leading a revolution to shake
this society to its very foundations?
149
00:08:27,280 --> 00:08:28,800
Magic mushrooms.
150
00:08:28,840 --> 00:08:30,840
They call me The Fun Guy.
151
00:08:31,480 --> 00:08:33,480
How are they magic?
Believe, ya.
152
00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:37,600
See this? This is called Insania.
153
00:08:38,400 --> 00:08:40,800
One of these, you'll be totally
hamstered.
154
00:08:41,440 --> 00:08:43,440
Turned mandem into Mickey Mouse.
155
00:08:44,120 --> 00:08:46,120
The rainbows, the shows...
156
00:08:46,160 --> 00:08:48,520
that's how you keep those men under
control.
157
00:08:48,560 --> 00:08:50,560
They're...
Baked. Mashed.
158
00:08:50,600 --> 00:08:52,000
Hashtag spangled.
159
00:08:52,040 --> 00:08:54,320
Shit, I envy them.
160
00:08:54,360 --> 00:08:56,960
But Spectrum live by the candy-man's
code.
161
00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:59,840
Page one of the rulebook. Know it?
162
00:08:59,880 --> 00:09:01,880
Yes, obviously. I'm a pimp.
163
00:09:02,480 --> 00:09:04,480
A watched pot never boils.
164
00:09:04,920 --> 00:09:06,920
Never get high on your own supply.
165
00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:09,880
Dad, you're falling apart.
166
00:09:09,920 --> 00:09:12,960
Hell, I'd keep you alive,
just to have someone to rinse.
167
00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:16,160
But that way, I'd be letting you off
the meat hook.
168
00:09:16,200 --> 00:09:20,120
I'd rather be in that rank cage with
those mouth-breathing mushroom-junkies
169
00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:22,560
than safe, warm, well-fed
and working for Spectrum.
170
00:09:22,600 --> 00:09:23,920
I wouldn't.
171
00:09:23,960 --> 00:09:26,360
I'm your dad.
You can't leave me alone with the fat men.
172
00:09:26,400 --> 00:09:29,760
You shouldn't negatively stereotype
body shapes, you lanky git.
173
00:09:29,800 --> 00:09:32,440
Sha-boi! You just got served a plate
of your own ass!
174
00:09:32,480 --> 00:09:34,120
How'd it taste?
175
00:09:34,160 --> 00:09:35,720
I want to join Spectrum.
176
00:09:35,760 --> 00:09:38,040
Then you better speak to the boss.
177
00:09:44,600 --> 00:09:45,680
Hello!
178
00:09:46,960 --> 00:09:48,280
Jackpot!
179
00:09:51,440 --> 00:09:52,680
I surrender.
180
00:09:56,480 --> 00:09:57,600
Ohh!
181
00:09:57,640 --> 00:09:59,640
Liberty caps.
182
00:09:59,680 --> 00:10:02,880
Took one of these in Truro,
ended up crawling seven miles
183
00:10:02,920 --> 00:10:05,280
just to giggle at a village called
Cocks.
184
00:10:18,590 --> 00:10:20,270
I found this bleach in the limo.
185
00:10:20,310 --> 00:10:22,910
Bleach? What were those women
planning in there?
186
00:10:22,950 --> 00:10:25,110
Believe me, you don't want to know.
187
00:10:25,150 --> 00:10:28,070
I'll combine it with acetone
in these cosmetics and make chloroform.
188
00:10:28,110 --> 00:10:29,830
To knock the guards unconscious.
189
00:10:29,870 --> 00:10:34,590
And I'll use the rest of the bleach
to fill these water pistols. Let's blind the bastards!
190
00:10:34,630 --> 00:10:39,830
Water-pistol willies. Those hens and
their risque sense of humour. It's so silly. I love it!
191
00:10:39,870 --> 00:10:41,670
Now remember, we're relying
on the element of surprise, OK?
192
00:10:41,710 --> 00:10:44,430
Yamato, get these chocolate
handcuffs melting.
193
00:10:44,470 --> 00:10:46,870
Let's hit them with a little bit of
theatre.
194
00:10:47,870 --> 00:10:49,030
Whoo!
195
00:10:51,790 --> 00:10:55,390
Aren't you still angry with me?
I thought you wanted to beat me up?
196
00:10:55,430 --> 00:10:57,430
Mum says getting angry is easy.
197
00:10:57,470 --> 00:10:59,230
It's a bad habit.
198
00:10:59,270 --> 00:11:01,990
How do I know you won't stab me in
the back to try and save your dad?
199
00:11:02,030 --> 00:11:04,190
I don't mix business with family.
200
00:11:04,230 --> 00:11:06,590
We'll see. Let the games begin.
201
00:11:15,670 --> 00:11:17,670
The throne-room. How d'you like it?
202
00:11:18,190 --> 00:11:20,310
Yeah. Very er... very snazzy.
203
00:11:20,350 --> 00:11:23,430
I'm trying to drag cannibalism
into the 21st century.
204
00:11:24,910 --> 00:11:26,750
Thank you very much.
Listen...
205
00:11:26,790 --> 00:11:28,910
I get it. You hate men.
206
00:11:28,950 --> 00:11:34,150
And a pack of shaggers like me and
the lads, we're heartbreakers. You ladies want revenge.
207
00:11:34,190 --> 00:11:38,150
This isn't about gender. I'd offer
you a job but you crammed your tongue down my throat,
208
00:11:38,190 --> 00:11:40,790
and I'm not having this office party
getting lungey.
209
00:11:46,430 --> 00:11:48,670
Five boxes. Five contestants.
210
00:11:49,790 --> 00:11:51,750
One game that could change a life!
211
00:11:52,550 --> 00:11:55,270
Welcome to the Dream Factory!
212
00:12:10,750 --> 00:12:12,270
Hello!
213
00:12:18,990 --> 00:12:22,230
Well, that was...elaborate.
214
00:12:24,030 --> 00:12:26,030
Gentlemen, show me your boxes.
215
00:12:30,110 --> 00:12:32,830
Now, Ash, tell me, are you nervous?
216
00:12:33,510 --> 00:12:36,030
Do you have a strategy, a tactical
game plan?
217
00:12:36,070 --> 00:12:38,070
Tactics? It's blind luck.
218
00:12:38,110 --> 00:12:40,830
I think me and Number 3 formed a
real bond
219
00:12:40,870 --> 00:12:43,950
when I force-fed him the guys
from his life-drawing class.
220
00:12:43,990 --> 00:12:46,870
You have selected Box Number 3.
221
00:12:48,550 --> 00:12:51,470
Oh, my days! What a roller coaster
ride!
222
00:12:52,150 --> 00:12:54,030
Number 3, you're back to the cage.
223
00:12:55,150 --> 00:12:57,430
Hush now, the phone is ringing.
224
00:12:58,670 --> 00:13:00,670
Ring-a-ding-ding.
225
00:13:00,870 --> 00:13:03,150
Ring-a-ding-ding.
226
00:13:03,190 --> 00:13:05,590
'Sup, bruv?
The phone isn't even plugged in.
227
00:13:05,630 --> 00:13:08,510
Yeah. He is a dick.
228
00:13:08,550 --> 00:13:10,510
Mm, yeah.
229
00:13:10,550 --> 00:13:12,310
Mm.
230
00:13:12,350 --> 00:13:14,230
All right. Bye.
231
00:13:15,070 --> 00:13:18,150
Can we get this bullshit over with,
so I can get back to my sty?
232
00:13:18,190 --> 00:13:20,910
You know the prize, what you win,
right?
233
00:13:20,950 --> 00:13:25,470
If you get the golden ticket,
we unlock your chains and set you free.
234
00:13:25,510 --> 00:13:27,510
Yeah.
Ooh!
235
00:13:35,950 --> 00:13:37,350
Hello, Tracy.
236
00:13:40,230 --> 00:13:41,510
Good night, sweetheart.
237
00:13:43,190 --> 00:13:44,750
Now for the main room.
238
00:13:44,790 --> 00:13:48,390
We gotta take them out
armed only with some bows and arrows,
239
00:13:48,430 --> 00:13:51,670
a French maid's cossie
and a pair of nipple tassels.
240
00:13:51,710 --> 00:13:53,910
How do we do that?
Never fear, Susan.
241
00:13:53,950 --> 00:13:55,910
One of us mentioning no names
242
00:13:55,950 --> 00:13:58,350
can grab their attention voila.
243
00:14:00,590 --> 00:14:02,350
Come on! Feel the force.
244
00:14:03,070 --> 00:14:04,870
Focus, Ash, focus.
245
00:14:04,910 --> 00:14:06,830
Positive energy! Come on.
246
00:14:09,590 --> 00:14:11,590
4!
Yes! Ohh!
247
00:14:13,030 --> 00:14:15,350
Oh, you've been a great player, by
the way.
248
00:14:15,390 --> 00:14:17,550
I hope you win. You deserve it.
249
00:14:17,590 --> 00:14:20,230
Best of luck, mate.
Cheers, thanks then.
250
00:14:21,870 --> 00:14:22,990
Ohh!
251
00:14:23,030 --> 00:14:24,830
Ohh! Ohh!
252
00:14:24,870 --> 00:14:27,270
I'm free! I'm free, yes!
253
00:14:27,310 --> 00:14:28,910
In your face! Yes!
254
00:14:28,950 --> 00:14:31,830
That's not a ticket, Tom.
What?
255
00:14:31,870 --> 00:14:34,230
Number 2, let's complete the game.
256
00:14:41,550 --> 00:14:43,550
Thanks very much. See you later,
guys.
257
00:14:43,590 --> 00:14:45,630
Take care. Look after yourself.
258
00:14:50,590 --> 00:14:52,350
That's piri-piri.
259
00:14:52,390 --> 00:14:54,790
Dad!
That's right, pussy whore.
260
00:14:54,830 --> 00:14:56,910
You better piri-piri up them digits.
261
00:14:56,950 --> 00:15:00,230
Cos I'm gonna play wing roulette
with your fingers, bruv!
262
00:15:00,270 --> 00:15:02,270
Ain't so jokes now, is it?
263
00:15:02,910 --> 00:15:04,910
Time to go put on my rape bib.
264
00:15:07,550 --> 00:15:12,470
I knew this game was rigged! You set
me up, sitting there like some sexy Jesus.
265
00:15:13,830 --> 00:15:15,630
Just get him in the oven.
266
00:15:15,670 --> 00:15:18,470
You're gonna cook me alive?
Why d'you have to be such a bitch?
267
00:15:18,510 --> 00:15:21,150
There it is. The textbook
misogynist.
268
00:15:22,190 --> 00:15:24,590
Guys think it's all about them.
269
00:15:25,670 --> 00:15:28,870
I wear nice clothes
and apparently I'm dressing for men.
270
00:15:29,510 --> 00:15:34,630
I get into shape, go out dancing
and suddenly I'm trying to find a boyfriend.
271
00:15:34,670 --> 00:15:40,550
I find a boyfriend, jail-break his
phone, misinterpret one text message
272
00:15:40,590 --> 00:15:45,110
and end up paying for a plane to fly
a massive banner over his sister's wedding
273
00:15:45,150 --> 00:15:48,710
saying, "Ben Hackett is a lying
three-inch prick!"
274
00:15:49,790 --> 00:15:52,110
Suddenly I'm the crazy bitch?
275
00:15:52,150 --> 00:15:54,630
Crazy? No!
276
00:15:54,670 --> 00:15:56,670
No! Yeah, you told him, sister.
277
00:15:57,510 --> 00:15:59,630
Just get him to the oven.
278
00:15:59,670 --> 00:16:02,430
Let him go!
It's OK, Laura. Don't be scared.
279
00:16:02,470 --> 00:16:04,310
I'm not scared, I'm angry!
280
00:16:04,350 --> 00:16:05,950
Angry?
281
00:16:05,990 --> 00:16:07,990
Wait...I can't feel my face.
282
00:16:10,790 --> 00:16:12,790
Did you spike my drink?
283
00:16:12,830 --> 00:16:14,910
I spiked everyone's drink.
284
00:16:20,470 --> 00:16:22,270
Do your magic.
285
00:16:26,670 --> 00:16:28,710
You've all been drinking Insania!
286
00:16:28,750 --> 00:16:30,990
You sick, twisted little monster!
287
00:16:31,030 --> 00:16:33,550
Seriously, just examine that
sentence.
288
00:16:33,590 --> 00:16:35,750
Oh, just get him cooking!
289
00:16:36,790 --> 00:16:39,750
Don't you wanna season me first?
What about a marinade?
290
00:16:40,390 --> 00:16:41,990
Ahem!
291
00:16:42,030 --> 00:16:43,910
What the hell?
292
00:16:43,950 --> 00:16:44,990
Felix!
293
00:16:57,390 --> 00:16:59,710
Oh, don't all start passing out!
294
00:16:59,750 --> 00:17:01,590
I had a whole dance routine planned.
295
00:17:04,070 --> 00:17:05,870
Oh, puddle duck!
296
00:17:07,190 --> 00:17:09,150
Felix! No-oo!
297
00:17:12,990 --> 00:17:16,030
Well, would you look at that?
Nipple tassel saved my life.
298
00:17:16,070 --> 00:17:18,190
That's quality craftsmanship.
Oi!
299
00:17:19,310 --> 00:17:21,070
D'you know your problem?
300
00:17:21,110 --> 00:17:25,470
You're the kind of girl that gets
her flatmates' attention by pretending to be anorexic,
301
00:17:25,510 --> 00:17:29,350
then sneaks into the communal fridge
at night and eats all their fucking cheese.
302
00:17:29,390 --> 00:17:32,270
That is scarily accurate.
303
00:17:34,350 --> 00:17:35,590
Yes!
304
00:17:35,630 --> 00:17:38,910
Any minute now,
they are all gonna turn into Mickey Mouse!
305
00:17:38,950 --> 00:17:42,310
Well, if I know anything about
Liberty Caps, which I do,
306
00:17:42,350 --> 00:17:45,630
these poor mares are heading into
a drug-induced coma.
307
00:17:45,670 --> 00:17:47,950
It's magic!
It's brain damage.
308
00:17:47,990 --> 00:17:49,950
You mean they're all...
309
00:17:50,310 --> 00:17:54,830
OK, let's leave the nice ladies
to have a long, long sleep, hm?
310
00:17:54,870 --> 00:17:56,870
No, he was saying that they're all
dead.
311
00:17:56,910 --> 00:17:59,630
Randal!
What about Daddy? He's in there!
312
00:18:07,550 --> 00:18:09,150
Oh, oh!
313
00:18:11,590 --> 00:18:13,710
Thank God.
Where are your clothes?
314
00:18:14,350 --> 00:18:16,310
You mean, you didn't go in there
naked?
315
00:18:16,350 --> 00:18:17,590
It was hot.
316
00:18:17,630 --> 00:18:19,950
It was getting seriously sweaty in
there.
317
00:18:21,950 --> 00:18:23,950
Shall I go and get them?
Yeah.
318
00:18:34,310 --> 00:18:36,310
Tom?
Go. I'll catch up.
319
00:18:36,350 --> 00:18:38,350
Dad, what are you doing?
320
00:18:39,750 --> 00:18:43,630
You called me a coward and you were
right. I don't want to be a coward all my life.
321
00:18:44,670 --> 00:18:45,990
Tom!
322
00:18:50,590 --> 00:18:52,590
Come on, you're free. Hurry!
323
00:18:54,310 --> 00:18:55,870
Noel's back.
324
00:18:56,710 --> 00:18:59,070
And this time, it's my house party.
325
00:19:01,030 --> 00:19:03,950
Come on, let's take a walk to
Crinkly Bottom, bruv.
326
00:19:12,630 --> 00:19:13,830
Agh! Agh!
327
00:19:17,150 --> 00:19:18,230
Gotcha!
328
00:19:19,750 --> 00:19:21,630
I've waited a long time to do this.
329
00:19:22,310 --> 00:19:24,150
It's time to meet the banker.
330
00:19:31,510 --> 00:19:33,110
There's an arrow in my neck.
331
00:19:34,030 --> 00:19:35,910
Man, that's cringe.
332
00:19:38,190 --> 00:19:39,590
Help me.
333
00:19:42,150 --> 00:19:44,150
You utter queef!
334
00:19:46,670 --> 00:19:49,470
Shit! I was aiming for his leg.
335
00:19:49,510 --> 00:19:51,430
Tom!
336
00:19:54,910 --> 00:19:56,750
That was just like in Under Siege.
337
00:19:56,790 --> 00:19:59,670
The Steven Seagal movie?
You're learning, love.
338
00:20:00,510 --> 00:20:02,310
Agh!
Oh, no, Tom!
339
00:20:02,350 --> 00:20:04,710
No, no, no, Tom, Tom! Tom!
340
00:20:04,750 --> 00:20:06,470
Oh, fuck!
341
00:20:06,510 --> 00:20:07,950
Tom!
342
00:20:07,990 --> 00:20:09,590
Tom, please.
343
00:20:10,910 --> 00:20:12,110
Tom!
344
00:20:12,150 --> 00:20:14,430
Tom, look at me!
I love you.
345
00:20:14,470 --> 00:20:17,470
Are you saying that cos you're
afraid? Afraid of losing you.
346
00:20:18,510 --> 00:20:20,230
Daddy!
347
00:20:20,270 --> 00:20:21,550
Tom?
348
00:20:22,390 --> 00:20:23,990
Tom!
349
00:20:24,030 --> 00:20:27,430
Happy birthday. I brought you some
lukewarm Polish lagers.
350
00:20:27,470 --> 00:20:29,470
Ooh, what a treat!
351
00:20:29,510 --> 00:20:31,670
How was your summer?
Average, you know.
352
00:20:31,710 --> 00:20:34,270
I got a job at Blockbuster's.
I thought they went bust?
353
00:20:34,310 --> 00:20:35,950
A job demolishing a Blockbuster's.
354
00:20:35,990 --> 00:20:38,790
Was it a bit like destroying your
childhood? Yeah, kind of.
355
00:20:38,830 --> 00:20:42,750
Like wanking in my Thunderbirds
pyjamas... which I do not still wear.
356
00:20:42,790 --> 00:20:44,790
How was France?
Yeah, it was OK.
357
00:20:45,910 --> 00:20:48,590
Amazing how far you can get on just,
like, "Bof".
358
00:20:48,630 --> 00:20:50,510
I told you. French is just...
359
00:20:50,550 --> 00:20:53,030
Pretentious shrugging, I know.
360
00:20:54,630 --> 00:20:57,630
Turns out Oscar was staying
in the same part of Paris.
361
00:20:57,670 --> 00:20:59,310
Oscar? Jesus.
362
00:20:59,350 --> 00:21:01,350
Yeah, it was OK, actually.
363
00:21:03,270 --> 00:21:07,350
So I was taking a sledgehammer
to the action films...
364
00:21:07,390 --> 00:21:08,430
Oh.
365
00:21:08,470 --> 00:21:15,190
..and I got to thinking, that if you
ever wanted to go bowling in a romantic capacity...
366
00:21:15,230 --> 00:21:16,750
What?
367
00:21:17,990 --> 00:21:19,950
Oh, Tom, I didn't know.
368
00:21:20,790 --> 00:21:22,790
Why didn't you tell me before?
369
00:21:22,830 --> 00:21:24,550
You know me, I like to play it cool.
370
00:21:24,590 --> 00:21:26,590
The thing is, I'm seeing Oscar.
371
00:21:27,750 --> 00:21:29,030
Oscar?
372
00:21:29,670 --> 00:21:31,670
Oscar Oscar? Why?
373
00:21:32,230 --> 00:21:34,310
He's very emotionally intelligent.
374
00:21:34,350 --> 00:21:36,950
What, as opposed to intelligent
intelligent?
375
00:21:36,990 --> 00:21:39,710
Yeah, to be honest, it is more of a
physical thing.
376
00:21:40,430 --> 00:21:42,430
He has got an amazing...
377
00:21:42,470 --> 00:21:44,590
OK, I'm just gonna crank this thing
up.
378
00:21:48,990 --> 00:21:53,190
Oh, if you're thinking of playing 21
Seconds, I played it earlier. Bombed.
379
00:21:54,590 --> 00:21:56,590
No Way.
380
00:21:56,630 --> 00:21:59,110
Oh, Young Fathers! I love this band.
381
00:21:59,150 --> 00:22:01,150
Yeah, they're really um...
382
00:22:01,190 --> 00:22:03,190
They er... they some...
383
00:22:03,910 --> 00:22:06,150
Sorry, as in Oscar-Oscar-Oscar?
384
00:22:06,190 --> 00:22:08,190
Blame Paris.
385
00:22:08,230 --> 00:22:10,230
The City of Love.
386
00:22:10,270 --> 00:22:12,270
The City of Bullshit.
Hey!
387
00:22:14,030 --> 00:22:16,430
We can still be friends, right?
388
00:22:17,630 --> 00:22:19,710
Yeah, yeah. Like, it was just an
idea.
389
00:22:19,750 --> 00:22:21,750
It's not like I love you...loads.
390
00:22:23,430 --> 00:22:24,790
Hey.
391
00:22:24,830 --> 00:22:26,430
Smile.
392
00:22:35,550 --> 00:22:37,550
Will Daddy be OK?
393
00:22:37,590 --> 00:22:39,590
Oh, I hope so, sweetheart.
394
00:22:41,630 --> 00:22:44,950
Randal, those aren't edible.
They're my actual knickers.
395
00:22:47,430 --> 00:22:49,430
But I'm halfway through the gusset.
396
00:22:49,470 --> 00:22:51,470
Randal, that's disgusting!
397
00:22:53,470 --> 00:22:55,470
Mummy, are we there yet?
398
00:22:55,510 --> 00:22:57,510
Laura, seriously?
399
00:22:58,830 --> 00:23:01,230
At the end of a highway
400
00:23:01,750 --> 00:23:04,630
There's no place you can go
401
00:23:06,070 --> 00:23:08,790
But just tell me you love me
402
00:23:09,270 --> 00:23:12,310
And you are only mine
403
00:23:12,910 --> 00:23:16,310
And our love will go on
404
00:23:16,990 --> 00:23:22,700
Till the end of time
405
00:23:22,750 --> 00:23:26,750
Subtitle by Deluxe
Synced and corrected by santibone www.addic7ed.com
406
00:23:27,710 --> 00:23:29,710
Jesus will rise again!
407
00:23:29,760 --> 00:23:34,310
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