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1
00:00:26,300 --> 00:00:28,267
Hope I'm not getting
mixed signals here.
2
00:00:32,434 --> 00:00:33,934
'Cause I'd hate
to think the fact
3
00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:35,901
that you're a few years
older than me is putting you off.
4
00:00:39,267 --> 00:00:40,601
I mean, what is age,
really?
5
00:00:40,667 --> 00:00:42,601
Just shut up.
You're winning.
6
00:00:42,667 --> 00:00:44,868
Well, in that case,
what's your tomorrow look like?
7
00:00:44,934 --> 00:00:47,334
Ooh. Three days in a row.
8
00:00:47,400 --> 00:00:49,501
Well, I don't know.
That's starting to sound kind of serious.
9
00:00:49,567 --> 00:00:53,234
I mean,
how well do we know each other, really?
10
00:00:53,300 --> 00:00:55,601
Okay. Well, let's start
with me.
11
00:00:58,267 --> 00:00:59,701
Well, that's
pretty much it.
12
00:00:59,767 --> 00:01:01,601
Now tell me about yourself.
I wanna know everything.
13
00:01:01,667 --> 00:01:02,734
Everything?
14
00:01:02,801 --> 00:01:04,534
Yeah, everything.
15
00:01:04,601 --> 00:01:06,634
Okay. Uh...
16
00:01:09,367 --> 00:01:11,334
Why don't we go back
to my place?
17
00:01:12,234 --> 00:01:13,300
Yay.
18
00:01:16,400 --> 00:01:18,634
Eric, if you're gonna have
a relationship with me,
19
00:01:18,701 --> 00:01:19,834
there's somebody else
that you're gonna have
20
00:01:19,901 --> 00:01:21,534
to have a relationship
with as well.
21
00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:26,801
KELLY: This is Diana.
22
00:01:28,567 --> 00:01:30,868
Oh, no. This is
too good to be true.
23
00:01:30,934 --> 00:01:32,634
You're vampires,
aren't you?
24
00:01:34,667 --> 00:01:36,200
Okay, go ahead.
25
00:01:37,801 --> 00:01:39,400
No, no. (CHUCKLES)
26
00:01:39,467 --> 00:01:41,934
Diana is the babysitter.
27
00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:43,534
Ooh, role-playing.
28
00:01:43,601 --> 00:01:45,634
Okay, I wanna be
the commander-in-chief of the allied armies.
29
00:01:47,033 --> 00:01:49,567
No, Diana is
my babysitter.
30
00:01:49,634 --> 00:01:52,734
Ah! Okay, I get it, yeah.
Diana's my babysitter.
31
00:01:53,567 --> 00:01:54,701
Hi, Mommy!
32
00:01:54,767 --> 00:01:56,467
Oh.
33
00:01:56,534 --> 00:01:58,067
Uh, Mommy,
that would be, like...
34
00:01:58,133 --> 00:02:01,434
Eric, I would like for you
to meet my son Ryan.
35
00:02:06,367 --> 00:02:09,200
You know, Cor,
I think I'm developing quite a knack
36
00:02:09,267 --> 00:02:11,200
for these scholastic
aptitude tests
37
00:02:11,267 --> 00:02:14,067
or as I prefer
to call them, SATs.
38
00:02:14,133 --> 00:02:16,567
Okay, okay, here's
another one. Verbal.
39
00:02:16,634 --> 00:02:18,934
It's how you talk and stuff.
Keep 'em coming.
40
00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:21,767
No, Shawn, listen
to the question, okay?
41
00:02:21,834 --> 00:02:24,734
Okay. "Perigee
is to apogee
42
00:02:24,801 --> 00:02:27,434
"as zenith
is to A, nadir,
43
00:02:27,501 --> 00:02:30,734
"B, cortex,
or C, sulfur?"
44
00:02:33,534 --> 00:02:34,868
Uh...
45
00:02:34,934 --> 00:02:36,968
(GROANING)
46
00:02:37,033 --> 00:02:38,334
(BABBLING)
47
00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:49,534
A, nadir.
I'm right, aren't I?
48
00:02:50,400 --> 00:02:51,934
Yeah.
49
00:02:52,000 --> 00:02:54,167
First two times
I took the SATs, put down sulfur and cortex,
50
00:02:54,234 --> 00:02:56,267
and we saw how well
that worked for me.
51
00:02:56,334 --> 00:02:59,267
So a third date
with Kelly tonight. How'd it go?
52
00:02:59,334 --> 00:03:01,968
Uh, she took me back
to her apartment.
53
00:03:02,033 --> 00:03:04,567
(LAUGHING) Wow! Details.
54
00:03:04,634 --> 00:03:08,434
Okay, nice apartment,
hardwood floors, little kid, overlooking the park.
55
00:03:08,501 --> 00:03:10,167
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Eric.
56
00:03:10,234 --> 00:03:12,767
How did she
get an apartment overlooking the park?
57
00:03:12,834 --> 00:03:14,434
Cor, I said she has a kid.
58
00:03:14,501 --> 00:03:16,400
Now, does she get
the afternoon sun and everything?
59
00:03:16,467 --> 00:03:19,267
Cory, Cory, Cory, Cory,
if I'm gonna involve you in these adult conversations,
60
00:03:19,334 --> 00:03:23,667
you're gonna have to pick up
on little key phrases like "she has a kid."
61
00:03:25,434 --> 00:03:26,434
A kid, huh?
62
00:03:26,501 --> 00:03:28,267
Yeah.
63
00:03:28,334 --> 00:03:30,868
Well, that kind of
complicates things, doesn't it?
64
00:03:30,934 --> 00:03:33,601
Yeah. I mean, I guess,
but we really like each other.
65
00:03:33,667 --> 00:03:34,934
That's all that
matters, right?
66
00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:38,100
I mean, she's out
in the real world. So am I.
67
00:03:38,167 --> 00:03:40,634
Got a good job,
got me a nice house.
68
00:03:40,701 --> 00:03:42,834
I frankly think
I'm ready for an adult relationship.
69
00:03:42,901 --> 00:03:45,601
Well, that's great.
So what do Mom and Dad think?
70
00:03:45,667 --> 00:03:47,734
I'm too scared
to tell 'em.
71
00:03:47,801 --> 00:03:49,334
(KNOCK AT DOOR)
72
00:03:55,033 --> 00:03:56,534
Eric.
73
00:03:56,601 --> 00:03:58,133
Hi, Kelly.
74
00:03:58,200 --> 00:03:59,434
Flowers.
75
00:04:00,133 --> 00:04:01,133
Oh, thank you.
76
00:04:01,200 --> 00:04:02,200
Here you go.
77
00:04:02,267 --> 00:04:03,467
Thanks.
Come in. Come in.
78
00:04:03,534 --> 00:04:05,434
Thanks. (CLEARS THROAT)
79
00:04:08,067 --> 00:04:10,601
Wow. I didn't expect
to see you again.
80
00:04:10,667 --> 00:04:12,334
Why not?
81
00:04:12,400 --> 00:04:15,200
Well, it's just that when
most guys find out about...
82
00:04:15,267 --> 00:04:16,567
I'm not most guys.
83
00:04:18,234 --> 00:04:21,767
See, I... I have
a little brother and a little sister, you know?
84
00:04:21,834 --> 00:04:26,400
I'm used to
being around kids. I love kids.
85
00:04:26,467 --> 00:04:29,434
Having a kid brother
and sister of your own is a little bit different
86
00:04:29,501 --> 00:04:33,067
than being around
someone else's kid.
87
00:04:33,133 --> 00:04:36,300
Ryan isn't
someone else's kid. Ryan's your kid.
88
00:04:36,367 --> 00:04:38,167
I can't wait to get
to know him, too.
89
00:04:39,734 --> 00:04:42,267
I'm so glad I met you,
Eric Matthews.
90
00:04:43,000 --> 00:04:45,300
Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!
91
00:04:45,367 --> 00:04:47,234
Hello, sir.
92
00:04:47,300 --> 00:04:49,334
Sir? No, buddy,
it's Eric.
93
00:04:49,400 --> 00:04:50,801
Remember, I met you
the other night?
94
00:04:50,868 --> 00:04:53,000
Well, he gets
a little shy around new people.
95
00:04:53,067 --> 00:04:55,100
Well, not around me.
Hey, tell you what.
96
00:04:55,167 --> 00:04:58,534
Why don't you and me go out,
we'll grab a burger? We'll even take your mom.
97
00:04:58,601 --> 00:05:00,400
Mommy, wanna come with us?
98
00:05:00,467 --> 00:05:03,634
Well, I suppose,
but you gotta put your sweater on first, mister.
99
00:05:03,701 --> 00:05:05,300
I don't wanna.
100
00:05:05,367 --> 00:05:07,501
Ryan, I'm not asking you.
Put your sweater on.
101
00:05:07,567 --> 00:05:09,167
No.
102
00:05:09,234 --> 00:05:10,934
You know
something, buddy,
103
00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:14,334
I happen to know something
about this sweater I bet you you don't.
104
00:05:14,400 --> 00:05:17,701
This sweater was made
by a magic genie.
105
00:05:19,100 --> 00:05:20,267
(SOFTLY)
Are genies still hot?
106
00:05:20,334 --> 00:05:22,400
Keep going.
107
00:05:22,467 --> 00:05:25,000
So this genie made
this sweater special,
108
00:05:25,067 --> 00:05:28,300
and anybody who wears it
can fly.
109
00:05:28,367 --> 00:05:30,634
Gimme a break.
110
00:05:30,701 --> 00:05:32,434
Fine. Don't fly.
Take the bus.
111
00:05:33,767 --> 00:05:35,033
Yeah, sure.
112
00:05:35,100 --> 00:05:36,968
Kids like buses.
113
00:05:37,033 --> 00:05:38,501
ERIC: There we are.
114
00:05:38,567 --> 00:05:41,434
See? This sweater
isn't magic. I can't...
115
00:05:41,501 --> 00:05:42,634
You're flying!
116
00:05:42,701 --> 00:05:45,968
Whoa! Whoo-hoo!
117
00:05:46,033 --> 00:05:47,868
Whee!
Uh-oh. We've got engine failure.
118
00:05:47,934 --> 00:05:49,234
We're going down.
119
00:05:49,300 --> 00:05:52,400
(IMITATES PLANE CRASHING)
120
00:05:52,467 --> 00:05:54,534
Do it again.
(LAUGHING)
121
00:05:54,601 --> 00:05:57,534
All right, children,
Mommy's hungry. Let's go.
122
00:05:57,601 --> 00:06:00,033
All righty.
Oh, I know this really nice restaurant.
123
00:06:00,100 --> 00:06:03,000
I don't know about kids
in nice restaurants.
124
00:06:03,067 --> 00:06:04,501
Oh, don't worry
about this place.
125
00:06:04,567 --> 00:06:06,767
While some may see it
as elegant and romantic...
126
00:06:06,834 --> 00:06:09,300
...others see it
as the perfect place for kids.
127
00:06:09,367 --> 00:06:11,033
Can I go play
that pinball machine?
128
00:06:11,100 --> 00:06:14,968
Well, sure. I just
happen to have a pocket full of quarters here.
129
00:06:15,033 --> 00:06:16,033
Thanks, Eric.
130
00:06:16,100 --> 00:06:18,501
You're welcome, buddy.
131
00:06:18,567 --> 00:06:20,400
Okay. What's wrong
with you?
132
00:06:20,467 --> 00:06:22,267
What, the quarters?
I do my own laundry.
133
00:06:22,334 --> 00:06:24,501
No. You say
all the right things,
134
00:06:24,567 --> 00:06:27,868
you're good with Ryan,
you are cute as heck,
135
00:06:27,934 --> 00:06:29,634
and you're not
running away.
136
00:06:29,701 --> 00:06:31,801
Where would I run to
that's better than this?
137
00:06:31,868 --> 00:06:34,033
See? Stop saying
those good things.
138
00:06:34,100 --> 00:06:35,701
Well, I'm sorry.
It's the truth.
139
00:06:35,767 --> 00:06:39,601
I mean, all the girls
I've dated, they seem so young, you know?
140
00:06:39,667 --> 00:06:42,467
They're still trying to
figure out what they want to do with their lives.
141
00:06:42,534 --> 00:06:45,734
You, you're well-grounded.
You have a kid.
142
00:06:45,801 --> 00:06:49,300
I mean, you're responsible
for a whole 'nother life.
143
00:06:49,367 --> 00:06:52,701
Well, having Ryan
has definitely been a blessing in my life,
144
00:06:52,767 --> 00:06:54,767
but at this point
in your life,
145
00:06:54,834 --> 00:06:56,801
is that something
that you want?
146
00:06:56,868 --> 00:06:58,934
(PINBALL MACHINE CLANKING)
147
00:07:03,767 --> 00:07:05,267
That's where my life
is going.
148
00:07:08,267 --> 00:07:09,901
So...
149
00:07:09,968 --> 00:07:12,234
Tell me about
your family.
150
00:07:12,300 --> 00:07:14,767
Ooh, my family.
Okay, um...
151
00:07:14,834 --> 00:07:17,467
Well, I have
a younger brother, Cory,
152
00:07:17,534 --> 00:07:19,601
and I really like
the kind of guy he's turning into.
153
00:07:19,667 --> 00:07:21,534
You know, I really like
hanging out with him now.
154
00:07:21,601 --> 00:07:22,767
Hey, Eric.
155
00:07:22,834 --> 00:07:24,033
Not now.
Get out of here.
156
00:07:24,100 --> 00:07:25,100
Where's the baby?
157
00:07:25,167 --> 00:07:26,200
Get out of here now.
158
00:07:26,267 --> 00:07:28,634
Hi, Kelly. I'm Cory,
and this is Shawn.
159
00:07:28,701 --> 00:07:30,934
No, really.
Where's the baby?
160
00:07:31,033 --> 00:07:33,067
What? I think
it's a valid question.
161
00:07:33,133 --> 00:07:35,334
He's back there
at the pinball machine.
162
00:07:35,400 --> 00:07:37,434
Oh, do you mind
if I go over there and play with the baby?
163
00:07:38,234 --> 00:07:39,567
He's okay.
164
00:07:41,567 --> 00:07:44,601
So, listen, Eric.
Me and Shawn are going to a movie.
165
00:07:44,667 --> 00:07:45,667
You guys wanna come?
166
00:07:45,734 --> 00:07:47,133
Oh, definitely.
How about it, Kell?
167
00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:49,767
I've gotta
get Ryan to bed, but you guys go ahead.
168
00:07:49,834 --> 00:07:52,767
Eric, listen.
You do not wanna miss this one, okay?
169
00:07:52,834 --> 00:07:55,067
It's Jim Carrey
and Steven Seagal
170
00:07:55,133 --> 00:07:57,968
starring in What AreYou Doing In My Movie?
171
00:07:58,033 --> 00:08:00,033
Yeah, but it's all
about priorities, Cor,
172
00:08:00,100 --> 00:08:04,400
and, frankly,
mine are changing, so...
173
00:08:04,467 --> 00:08:07,767
If you don't mind, I'd like
to come home with you and maybe read Ryan a story.
174
00:08:08,934 --> 00:08:10,467
He'd like that.
175
00:08:13,133 --> 00:08:15,767
If angle A has a sine
of 30 degrees,
176
00:08:15,834 --> 00:08:17,968
what is the cosine
of angle B?
177
00:08:19,367 --> 00:08:21,501
Oh... I...
178
00:08:21,567 --> 00:08:22,934
(MUTTERING)
179
00:08:25,367 --> 00:08:27,067
(GROANING)
180
00:08:29,100 --> 00:08:30,734
You did that just
so we could be alone?
181
00:08:30,801 --> 00:08:32,901
Mmm, why would
you say that?
182
00:08:34,601 --> 00:08:36,167
Oh, the ear thing.
183
00:08:38,267 --> 00:08:40,734
Hey, you take those SATs
six or seven times,
184
00:08:40,801 --> 00:08:43,501
you start losing
that lovin' feeling.
185
00:08:43,567 --> 00:08:46,634
You know what, Eric?
Maybe the eighth time's a charm for you.
186
00:08:46,701 --> 00:08:49,467
I mean, why don't you,
you know, improve your scores,
187
00:08:49,534 --> 00:08:51,834
take the SATs again?
You could go to college.
188
00:08:51,901 --> 00:08:54,767
I mean, you are still
thinking about college, right?
189
00:08:54,834 --> 00:08:56,300
Mmm, maybe I'll
get around to it,
190
00:08:56,367 --> 00:08:57,601
but right now,
I'm happy with my life.
191
00:08:57,667 --> 00:09:01,501
I mean, I got a good job,
good girl, good kid.
192
00:09:01,567 --> 00:09:03,400
Yeah, my life
is coming together.
193
00:09:05,868 --> 00:09:07,033
Hey, Mom. Hey, Dad.
194
00:09:07,100 --> 00:09:08,234
How was your night?
195
00:09:10,100 --> 00:09:11,834
Okay, I'm gonna go now.
Your dad is scaring me.
196
00:09:11,901 --> 00:09:14,200
No, no, no.
You don't have to go anywhere.
197
00:09:14,267 --> 00:09:16,234
Everything
is just fine.
198
00:09:16,300 --> 00:09:17,767
Good night, Topanga.
199
00:09:18,801 --> 00:09:20,834
Bye-bye.
I'm coming, too.
200
00:09:20,901 --> 00:09:22,667
You, stay.
201
00:09:24,100 --> 00:09:25,934
(STAMMERING)
I thought you guys were going out.
202
00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:27,067
(DOOR CLOSES)
203
00:09:27,133 --> 00:09:29,300
Oh, we did.
We got about three blocks,
204
00:09:29,367 --> 00:09:31,734
(LAUGHING) and then
the funniest thing happened,
205
00:09:31,801 --> 00:09:35,701
except it really
wasn't that funny. We ran out of gas.
206
00:09:35,767 --> 00:09:38,133
Now, who had
that car last?
207
00:09:38,200 --> 00:09:40,467
Good question, Amy.
I think I know the answer.
208
00:09:40,534 --> 00:09:43,300
Could it be Cory?
209
00:09:43,367 --> 00:09:47,033
We got a little rule
around this house, Cor. I'm sure you know.
210
00:09:47,100 --> 00:09:51,000
He who has the car last
fills the tank with gas.
211
00:09:51,067 --> 00:09:54,033
Yes, I know, sir,
but I'm sorry, because I forgot.
212
00:09:54,100 --> 00:09:57,200
Well, you're about
three blocks too late for sorry.
213
00:09:57,267 --> 00:09:58,934
No car for a week.
214
00:10:03,701 --> 00:10:06,234
Do you know, he could have
at least let me explain.
215
00:10:06,300 --> 00:10:07,334
Why? What'd you have?
216
00:10:07,400 --> 00:10:09,300
Nothing. I got nothing.
217
00:10:10,400 --> 00:10:12,834
You know, Cor,
I was once a son myself.
218
00:10:12,901 --> 00:10:15,167
I'll go in there
and try to straighten it out for you, okay?
219
00:10:15,234 --> 00:10:16,701
Thanks, Eric.
Great.
220
00:10:20,801 --> 00:10:24,501
Oh, Dad, I can't believe
the way Cory was laughing at you behind your back.
221
00:10:24,567 --> 00:10:25,634
(HORN HONKS)
222
00:10:25,701 --> 00:10:27,300
Whoop, there's Kelly.
Better get going.
223
00:10:27,367 --> 00:10:29,234
Whoa, wait a minute.
You guys have been going out for a while,
224
00:10:29,300 --> 00:10:30,400
and we still
haven't met her.
225
00:10:30,467 --> 00:10:31,634
You should invite her
to come in.
226
00:10:31,701 --> 00:10:33,367
Uh, you know, Mom,
we're really in a hurry.
227
00:10:33,434 --> 00:10:35,601
Kelly, hon, come on in!
228
00:10:35,667 --> 00:10:37,234
You know something?
We're really in a rush.
229
00:10:37,300 --> 00:10:40,067
What's the matter?
Afraid I'll say something to embarrass you?
230
00:10:40,133 --> 00:10:42,000
Hi. I'm Kelly.
231
00:10:42,067 --> 00:10:43,901
Attaboy!
232
00:10:46,934 --> 00:10:48,300
Hi. It's nice
to meet you.
233
00:10:48,367 --> 00:10:50,734
I'm Amy.
This is Alan.
234
00:10:50,801 --> 00:10:52,834
Hello, Kelly.
Hi.
235
00:10:52,901 --> 00:10:54,767
Oh, and this is Ryan.
He's my son.
236
00:10:58,133 --> 00:11:02,434
Uh, did you hear that, Amy?
They've got a son.
237
00:11:09,200 --> 00:11:11,434
It's very nice
to meet you, both of you.
238
00:11:11,501 --> 00:11:16,234
So, can I get
anyone a drink? A, uh... Juice box?
239
00:11:16,300 --> 00:11:17,701
Eric, why didn't
you tell them?
240
00:11:17,767 --> 00:11:19,234
Um, it's easy.
241
00:11:19,300 --> 00:11:21,367
Mom, Dad, Ryan.
Ryan, Mom, Dad.
242
00:11:21,434 --> 00:11:23,934
Now that we've all met,
laser tag.
243
00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:26,501
Mr. and Mrs. Matthews,
this is my son.
244
00:11:26,567 --> 00:11:28,400
His name is Ryan.
He's six years old.
245
00:11:28,467 --> 00:11:31,567
He's in the first grade,
and he is the love of my life.
246
00:11:31,634 --> 00:11:34,200
Did I hear laser tag?
Can I come, too?
247
00:11:34,267 --> 00:11:36,634
Well, actually, honey,
they're kind of on a date.
248
00:11:36,701 --> 00:11:38,300
So? She's bringing
her brother.
249
00:11:39,067 --> 00:11:40,567
She's my mom.
250
00:11:40,634 --> 00:11:42,501
Well, then
I'll bring my mom.
251
00:11:42,567 --> 00:11:43,968
Okay, whoever wants
to come can come,
252
00:11:44,033 --> 00:11:46,734
but for the love of God,
no more talking, okay?
253
00:11:46,801 --> 00:11:48,434
Well, it was very nice
meeting you all,
254
00:11:48,501 --> 00:11:49,601
but we should
get going.
255
00:11:49,667 --> 00:11:50,767
But I hope to see
you guys again.
256
00:11:50,834 --> 00:11:52,100
It was very nice
to meet you, Kelly,
257
00:11:52,167 --> 00:11:54,801
and you're welcome
here anytime.
258
00:11:54,868 --> 00:11:57,334
Sorry I thought
your mom was your sister.
259
00:11:57,400 --> 00:11:59,300
It's okay.
Happens all the time.
260
00:11:59,934 --> 00:12:02,968
Come on, kid.
261
00:12:03,033 --> 00:12:06,868
You know, Eric, why is Dad
going so nuts on me about this whole car thing?
262
00:12:06,934 --> 00:12:08,968
You? He's been all
over me about Kelly,
263
00:12:09,033 --> 00:12:10,934
and it's only
been five dates.
264
00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:12,434
It's not like
I'm planning my big June wedding or anything.
265
00:12:12,501 --> 00:12:13,601
Yeah.
266
00:12:15,601 --> 00:12:17,300
You're wearing
a tuxedo.
267
00:12:17,367 --> 00:12:19,000
What are you saying?
268
00:12:19,067 --> 00:12:21,534
Eric, listen,
why don't you take the SATs, okay?
269
00:12:21,601 --> 00:12:25,267
We could take them
together, you know, help each other out.
270
00:12:25,334 --> 00:12:28,701
Ah, my little Cory
with your get-smart-quick schemes.
271
00:12:28,767 --> 00:12:33,734
No, my friend, for me,
the good ship S.S. SAT has sailed.
272
00:12:35,701 --> 00:12:38,667
So that's it, huh?
No college.
273
00:12:38,734 --> 00:12:40,501
It's not like I'm ruining
my life or anything.
274
00:12:40,567 --> 00:12:42,634
I'll just move on
to what I would've done after college.
275
00:12:43,434 --> 00:12:45,167
Secret Service guy?
276
00:12:45,234 --> 00:12:47,267
You read
my secret dossier?
277
00:12:47,767 --> 00:12:48,834
What?
278
00:12:48,901 --> 00:12:51,767
Good night, guys.
Cory.
279
00:12:51,834 --> 00:12:54,501
Hope you understand
why I took away your driving privileges.
280
00:12:54,567 --> 00:12:56,834
Yes, Dad.
I completely understand.
281
00:12:56,901 --> 00:12:58,601
So can I have the car
tomorrow night?
282
00:12:58,667 --> 00:12:59,968
You're kidding, right?
283
00:13:00,033 --> 00:13:01,567
No. It's been
a couple days. Why not?
284
00:13:01,634 --> 00:13:03,601
I mean, why can't I have
the car tomorrow night?
285
00:13:03,667 --> 00:13:05,901
I said a week.
And I said I was sorry.
286
00:13:05,968 --> 00:13:08,100
Am I not being clear?
A week!
287
00:13:09,200 --> 00:13:10,367
Take off my tuxedo.
288
00:13:10,434 --> 00:13:13,234
Oh, but I'm so cute.
289
00:13:13,300 --> 00:13:16,300
You know, between
the two of you guys, I got...
290
00:13:17,067 --> 00:13:18,133
Nothing.
291
00:13:20,868 --> 00:13:24,868
You know, he is
taking this Dad stuff way too seriously.
292
00:13:24,934 --> 00:13:26,467
You know something, Cor,
293
00:13:26,534 --> 00:13:28,100
I've learned something
in all the time I've spent with Ryan.
294
00:13:28,167 --> 00:13:30,534
The key to a successful
father-son relationship
295
00:13:30,601 --> 00:13:34,534
is friendship,
communication, and trust.
296
00:13:34,601 --> 00:13:36,701
And occasionally,
you throw in a Tootsie Roll.
297
00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:39,701
So what do we do now?
298
00:13:39,767 --> 00:13:42,067
What do we do now?
We sit now, buddy, if that's okay.
299
00:13:42,133 --> 00:13:44,100
I think sitting's
the only thing we haven't done all day.
300
00:13:44,934 --> 00:13:46,033
Can we go to the zoo?
301
00:13:46,100 --> 00:13:47,801
Go to the zoo?
We already went to the zoo.
302
00:13:47,868 --> 00:13:49,567
Remember, I had to jump
into the ocelot cage
303
00:13:49,634 --> 00:13:51,400
to get your Sixers hat
from the game we went to?
304
00:13:51,467 --> 00:13:53,367
You were scared.
You ran fast.
305
00:13:53,434 --> 00:13:57,200
Yeah, well, I thought
the ocelot was part of the gerbil organization.
306
00:13:57,267 --> 00:13:58,868
They were leopards.
307
00:13:58,934 --> 00:14:01,200
Yeah, I know they're
leopards, but you told me they were gerbils.
308
00:14:01,267 --> 00:14:02,701
I did. (LAUGHS)
309
00:14:02,767 --> 00:14:04,434
Yeah. That's funny, huh?
(LAUGHING)
310
00:14:04,501 --> 00:14:06,601
And that is why
we're sitting now, buddy.
311
00:14:06,667 --> 00:14:10,033
I don't mind sitting.
You're gonna sit with me, right?
312
00:14:10,100 --> 00:14:12,534
Yeah, pal.
I'm gonna sit with you.
313
00:14:13,634 --> 00:14:14,834
Hey, Eric.
314
00:14:14,901 --> 00:14:17,033
Oh, hey, it's the baby!
315
00:14:17,100 --> 00:14:18,868
Aren't you adorable!
316
00:14:19,534 --> 00:14:20,901
You get a Tootsie Roll.
317
00:14:20,968 --> 00:14:22,000
Oh, thanks.
318
00:14:22,067 --> 00:14:23,934
Okay, Topanga.
Me and Cory against you,
319
00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:26,534
and you are going
dow-how-hown!
320
00:14:26,601 --> 00:14:28,133
Oh, well,
that's real fair.
321
00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:30,200
Eric, you wanna
be on my team?
322
00:14:30,267 --> 00:14:33,467
Topanga, I take my
babysitting responsibilities pretty seriously.
323
00:14:34,901 --> 00:14:36,033
One quick game.
Can I?
324
00:14:36,100 --> 00:14:37,868
You said you were
gonna be with me.
325
00:14:37,934 --> 00:14:39,267
Oh, I am gonna be
with you, buddy.
326
00:14:39,334 --> 00:14:41,133
I just wanna play
one quick game with them.
327
00:14:41,200 --> 00:14:42,968
Can I be on your team?
328
00:14:43,033 --> 00:14:45,634
Actually, you're still
a little too short to see over the table there, pal.
329
00:14:45,701 --> 00:14:48,000
You'd rather be
with them?
330
00:14:48,067 --> 00:14:51,767
No. It's just that
I've been with you all day, buddy.
331
00:14:51,834 --> 00:14:54,200
It's okay. You can
go play with them.
332
00:14:54,267 --> 00:14:57,267
Hey, you are the coolest,
buddy. Tootsie, huh?
333
00:15:00,434 --> 00:15:02,400
CORY: Okay. I'll break.
334
00:15:02,467 --> 00:15:04,567
So, Eric, what'd you
and your baby do today?
335
00:15:04,634 --> 00:15:08,133
Oh, we did just about
everything there is to do in the world.
336
00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:10,467
Cory, you have no idea
how adult you look to me right now.
337
00:15:16,501 --> 00:15:18,067
Can I have some
ice cream, please?
338
00:15:18,133 --> 00:15:21,400
Ice cream? Sure, buddy.
Not a problem. Here you go.
339
00:15:22,167 --> 00:15:23,467
Thanks.
For everything.
340
00:15:23,534 --> 00:15:25,868
(CHUCKLES)
You're welcome, pal.
341
00:15:25,934 --> 00:15:27,167
Eric, it's your shot.
342
00:15:27,234 --> 00:15:29,167
My shot. All right.
(GROANS)
343
00:15:29,234 --> 00:15:31,167
So, when are you guys
actually taking your SATs?
344
00:15:31,234 --> 00:15:32,367
A week from Saturday.
345
00:15:32,434 --> 00:15:34,300
(EXCLAIMS)
346
00:15:34,367 --> 00:15:35,767
I thought he knew.
347
00:15:35,834 --> 00:15:37,901
Actually, I told him
that there were no SATs,
348
00:15:37,968 --> 00:15:40,400
and that Saturday
was just cake day at school,
349
00:15:40,467 --> 00:15:42,167
and perhaps
some creme brulee.
350
00:15:43,400 --> 00:15:44,734
BOTH: Mmm!
351
00:15:46,567 --> 00:15:47,767
Okay, why don't
we do this?
352
00:15:47,834 --> 00:15:49,567
Why don't we
do the 10-ball
353
00:15:49,634 --> 00:15:52,467
in whatever pocket
it decides to go into, all right?
354
00:15:52,534 --> 00:15:55,367
Come on, Ryan!
Come check this shot out, my friend.
355
00:15:55,968 --> 00:15:57,000
Ry?
356
00:16:00,601 --> 00:16:01,701
Ryan?
357
00:16:03,267 --> 00:16:04,534
Where'd he go?
358
00:16:04,601 --> 00:16:06,367
The baby's gone?
359
00:16:09,501 --> 00:16:11,868
I yelled at him.
I can't believe I yelled at him.
360
00:16:11,934 --> 00:16:13,300
Eric, it's fine.
361
00:16:13,367 --> 00:16:15,634
He's in bed.
He's sleeping. It's over.
362
00:16:15,701 --> 00:16:17,634
I flipped out.
363
00:16:17,701 --> 00:16:20,701
I found him sitting
outside on the curb and...
364
00:16:22,267 --> 00:16:24,300
I started
screaming at him.
365
00:16:26,334 --> 00:16:30,033
I took my eye off him
for one minute, one minute,
366
00:16:30,100 --> 00:16:32,334
and anything
could've happened.
367
00:16:37,834 --> 00:16:39,667
How do you do this
every day?
368
00:16:41,734 --> 00:16:44,367
I do it because
I love him
369
00:16:44,434 --> 00:16:46,400
and because he's my son.
370
00:16:48,133 --> 00:16:50,934
Eric, you're the one
with the choice here.
371
00:16:52,601 --> 00:16:54,400
You know,
I was with him all day.
372
00:16:54,467 --> 00:16:58,133
I just wanted
a minute to myself and he got so upset.
373
00:16:58,200 --> 00:16:59,934
Yeah, but he's not
upset at you.
374
00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:03,234
He's upset at not having
a full-time father
375
00:17:03,300 --> 00:17:05,734
every minute of every day,
376
00:17:05,801 --> 00:17:08,100
you know, to make up
for what he lost.
377
00:17:10,801 --> 00:17:12,801
He needs so much.
378
00:17:12,868 --> 00:17:14,567
Yeah, he does.
379
00:17:17,901 --> 00:17:20,701
Eric, you are gonna be
such a great dad.
380
00:17:22,133 --> 00:17:23,200
But when you're ready.
381
00:17:24,934 --> 00:17:28,968
(SIGHS) Just because
I'm a mom doesn't mean that you have to be a dad.
382
00:17:30,801 --> 00:17:34,100
Kelly, I'm not looking
to get out of this.
383
00:17:34,167 --> 00:17:35,834
I know that, Eric.
384
00:17:36,701 --> 00:17:39,868
But listen to me.
385
00:17:39,934 --> 00:17:43,667
You still have so many
options available to you in your life.
386
00:17:45,133 --> 00:17:46,267
Take advantage of them.
387
00:17:49,467 --> 00:17:51,467
Eric, you know I'm right.
388
00:17:54,968 --> 00:17:56,133
You're dumping me.
389
00:17:58,200 --> 00:18:02,400
No. I just think that
the fair thing would be
390
00:18:02,467 --> 00:18:05,100
to get out of this
before anybody gets too attached.
391
00:18:07,033 --> 00:18:08,200
I see.
392
00:18:12,968 --> 00:18:14,667
I let you down.
393
00:18:14,734 --> 00:18:17,501
No. No, Eric. The only way
you could've let me down
394
00:18:17,567 --> 00:18:20,567
is if you had stuck around
just to be a nice guy.
395
00:18:20,634 --> 00:18:22,334
You wouldn't have been happy.
Neither would we.
396
00:18:22,834 --> 00:18:24,000
Kelly,
397
00:18:25,601 --> 00:18:28,000
I'm not looking
to get out of this.
398
00:18:31,501 --> 00:18:33,834
Well, you know
where we live.
399
00:18:38,133 --> 00:18:40,501
RYAN: Mommy, I need you!
400
00:18:40,567 --> 00:18:42,767
(SIGHS) I gotta go, Eric.
401
00:18:44,467 --> 00:18:45,534
Bye.
402
00:19:15,133 --> 00:19:17,634
MAN ON TV: The forecast,mostly sunny skies today,
403
00:19:17,701 --> 00:19:19,400
with brisk easterly winds,expect a high...
404
00:19:25,501 --> 00:19:27,133
(WHISPERING) Yes.
405
00:19:30,400 --> 00:19:32,534
Hey, Mommy, Daddy,
how you doing?
406
00:19:32,601 --> 00:19:35,567
Look at you two.
Watching TV.
407
00:19:35,634 --> 00:19:38,501
Ooh, these eyes.
Be nice to look at something
408
00:19:38,567 --> 00:19:40,701
other than a book,
don't you know?
409
00:19:40,767 --> 00:19:43,901
We know
you took the car.
410
00:19:43,968 --> 00:19:47,701
Uh, sorry, guys.
Listen, my friends needed a ride.
411
00:19:47,767 --> 00:19:49,033
You weren't around.
It was late...
412
00:19:49,100 --> 00:19:51,834
I don't care.
I told you a week. You took it anyway.
413
00:19:51,901 --> 00:19:54,400
You just bought
yourself two weeks.
414
00:19:54,467 --> 00:19:57,100
Dad! My friends
needed a ride, okay?
415
00:19:57,167 --> 00:19:59,901
It was late.
Why are you treating me like a kid?
416
00:19:59,968 --> 00:20:01,734
'Cause you are a kid.
417
00:20:01,801 --> 00:20:04,234
Eric, this is none of
your business, okay?
418
00:20:04,300 --> 00:20:08,000
You know something?
You're right. It's not, because I am not a dad.
419
00:20:08,067 --> 00:20:09,767
But I do know he's got
a tough time raising us,
420
00:20:09,834 --> 00:20:11,701
and I know that
we don't make it any easier.
421
00:20:11,767 --> 00:20:13,501
You think he likes
yelling at us?
422
00:20:13,567 --> 00:20:16,334
You think he likes when
you do something wrong? He doesn't. He hates it.
423
00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:19,000
And he can't keep
his eye on us every second. Now, go to your room!
424
00:20:20,934 --> 00:20:22,534
Dad, are you gonna
let him just...
425
00:20:22,601 --> 00:20:24,200
Go to your room.
426
00:20:31,167 --> 00:20:35,267
Well, maybe you are
ready to be a dad.
427
00:20:36,067 --> 00:20:38,200
Hmm. She dumped me.
428
00:20:40,033 --> 00:20:42,601
I'm gonna go upstairs
and study for my SATs.
429
00:20:51,467 --> 00:20:52,901
(DOOR OPENS)
430
00:20:54,100 --> 00:20:56,267
Hi. How are you two
this evening?
431
00:20:56,334 --> 00:20:58,200
Well, you're home
a little late this evening.
432
00:20:58,267 --> 00:21:00,567
Yes, we are.
Isn't that interesting?
433
00:21:00,634 --> 00:21:01,901
Cory, don't make
a big deal of it.
434
00:21:01,968 --> 00:21:05,300
No, no, no.
I just wanna know.
435
00:21:05,367 --> 00:21:07,167
Who had the car last?
436
00:21:07,634 --> 00:21:08,701
Him.
437
00:21:08,767 --> 00:21:09,868
Really?
Mmm-hmm.
438
00:21:09,934 --> 00:21:11,434
Dad did,
don't you know?
439
00:21:11,501 --> 00:21:12,667
Cory, let it go.
440
00:21:12,734 --> 00:21:15,067
No, no, no.
I just wanna know
441
00:21:15,133 --> 00:21:17,067
what happened
to that house rule.
442
00:21:17,133 --> 00:21:20,100
Um, you know,
the one that goes,
443
00:21:20,167 --> 00:21:23,601
"Whoever had
the car last puts gas in the tank."
444
00:21:23,667 --> 00:21:25,601
Sorry, Cor. I forgot.
445
00:21:27,434 --> 00:21:31,767
Well, Alan, you're about
seven blocks late for sorry.
446
00:21:31,834 --> 00:21:34,133
Wait a minute.
Let me get this straight.
447
00:21:34,200 --> 00:21:35,534
You're out
with your girlfriend.
448
00:21:35,601 --> 00:21:37,734
You legitimately
run out of gas.
449
00:21:37,801 --> 00:21:41,534
You push the car
back seven blocks just to yell at me?
450
00:21:41,601 --> 00:21:43,701
No. I just wanted to explain
why we were home so late
451
00:21:43,767 --> 00:21:45,734
and to say thank you.
452
00:21:45,801 --> 00:21:47,334
Cory!
And thank you, too.
453
00:21:47,384 --> 00:21:51,934
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