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RainBow: S?.
2
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S?, s?, s?.
3
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Gracias.
4
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Dre: To put it mildly,credit hasn't always been
5
00:00:09,986 --> 00:00:12,054
the easiest thing for a black man to get,
6
00:00:12,122 --> 00:00:14,022
whether it's a credit-card application,
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00:00:14,090 --> 00:00:15,758
the birth of rock 'n' roll,
8
00:00:15,825 --> 00:00:19,061
or civilization itself.
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00:00:19,129 --> 00:00:22,030
But as hard as it's been to
get credit for those things,
10
00:00:22,098 --> 00:00:23,966
it's even harder to get
credit from your wife.
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Babe?
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Yeah.
13
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Look... I loaded the dishwasher.
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Uh-huh.
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00:00:28,705 --> 00:00:30,739
Babe, are you not seeing what I'm seeing?
16
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Everything is exactly
where it's supposed to be.
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00:00:33,042 --> 00:00:34,243
You killed it, Dre.
18
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They didn't believe in you, but you did it.
19
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Silence the haters.
20
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- Cheese!
- [Shutter clicks]
21
00:00:39,449 --> 00:00:41,183
Look at my babies.
22
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Yeah, Dre, you killed it.
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Look, I'm just trying to do my part.
24
00:00:44,220 --> 00:00:46,088
You know, being a modern husband,
25
00:00:46,156 --> 00:00:48,257
I can bring home the bacon
and wash out the pan.
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00:00:48,324 --> 00:00:49,992
Are you trying to get credit
27
00:00:50,059 --> 00:00:51,994
for simply loading the dishwasher?
28
00:00:52,061 --> 00:00:54,261
Mm-hmm. Sure sounds like it.
29
00:00:54,361 --> 00:00:55,895
I should've stopped right there.
30
00:00:55,963 --> 00:00:57,297
It was like watching myself
31
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in a horror movie at the
Magic Johnson theater.
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Don't go in there, fool!
There's an argument in there!
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I've seen this one before, man.
He goes in there.
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This guy is stupid. Watch.
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I'm not trying to get credit.
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I'm just not not trying to get credit.
37
00:01:11,545 --> 00:01:13,012
[Audience screams]
38
00:01:14,448 --> 00:01:16,483
Told you he was stupid.
39
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No argument here.
40
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Licorice?
41
00:01:19,019 --> 00:01:20,086
Oh, thanks.
42
00:01:20,154 --> 00:01:21,688
[Screaming continues]
43
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Damn.
44
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- Sync and corrected by TheDelta -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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So, let me get this straight.
46
00:01:29,730 --> 00:01:31,498
I've cooked dinner, corrected homework.
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I'm making the lunches for tomorrow,
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00:01:33,567 --> 00:01:35,068
I talked a first-year resident
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through a really tough intubation,
in espa?ol,
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and you are trying to get credit for...
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Oh, look at this.
52
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Unh, unh, unh, unh, unh, unh, unh!
53
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Handles out.
54
00:01:44,712 --> 00:01:46,813
- Oh, boy. Okay.
- All right?
55
00:01:46,881 --> 00:01:48,948
I'm just trying to do my part around here,
baby.
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W-with all this new responsibility at work,
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I'm not gonna always be
able to step up like this.
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"Step up"?
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- Mm! Mm!
- [Newspaper rustles]
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00:01:55,055 --> 00:01:56,155
Pops! Yo!
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00:01:56,223 --> 00:01:58,725
Your paper is killing me, man.
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00:01:58,792 --> 00:02:00,793
Well, how else will you know
that I was here to witness you
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00:02:00,861 --> 00:02:02,829
unravel the fabric of your marriage, son?
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00:02:02,897 --> 00:02:06,199
Okay, look, I'm just saying,
now that I'm SVP,
65
00:02:06,267 --> 00:02:08,368
I'm gonna probably have
to dial it back some...
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You know, do a little less.
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00:02:10,271 --> 00:02:11,704
Oh, okay.
68
00:02:11,772 --> 00:02:13,106
[Laughing] I'm sorry.
69
00:02:13,173 --> 00:02:14,641
Did I say something funny?
70
00:02:14,708 --> 00:02:16,175
Um, well, you said "less."
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00:02:16,243 --> 00:02:18,878
But, baby, that's physically impossible.
72
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What? I help out!
73
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[Snoring]
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00:02:27,354 --> 00:02:29,289
Listen, we both have huge jobs,
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00:02:29,356 --> 00:02:31,224
but when I come home from mine
76
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from, you know, saving lives and whatnot,
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I start a whole other second huge job.
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00:02:36,130 --> 00:02:38,398
When you come home, you play video games.
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Babe, that is ridiculous!
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00:02:40,301 --> 00:02:41,935
[Music plays, dinging]
81
00:02:44,772 --> 00:02:47,574
That's the sound it makes
when I get a work e-mail.
82
00:02:47,641 --> 00:02:49,275
Male voice: You have lost this round.
83
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Playing time... 4 hours, 13 minutes.
84
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New record!
85
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Okay. Maybe I have a little problem.
86
00:02:55,449 --> 00:02:56,549
Just a little bit.
87
00:02:56,617 --> 00:02:57,517
- Hey, Dad.
- Hey, babe.
88
00:02:57,585 --> 00:02:58,484
- Mom.
- Yeah.
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00:02:58,552 --> 00:02:59,986
I forgot to tell you last week,
90
00:03:00,054 --> 00:03:02,021
but Jack and I need two dozen
cupcakes for school tomorrow.
91
00:03:02,089 --> 00:03:04,023
Yeah, that's 23 cupcakes.
92
00:03:04,091 --> 00:03:05,725
RainBow: Tomorrow?
93
00:03:05,793 --> 00:03:08,161
Oh, great. That sounds fun for me.
94
00:03:08,228 --> 00:03:09,996
And... be careful with the frosting.
95
00:03:10,064 --> 00:03:11,397
Last time you made some,
96
00:03:11,465 --> 00:03:13,533
it looked like you did them last-minute.
97
00:03:13,601 --> 00:03:15,401
Yeah, you kind of phoned it in, mom.
98
00:03:17,338 --> 00:03:19,238
[Sighs] Did you even hear what she said?
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Yes. She said, "hey, Dad."
100
00:03:20,507 --> 00:03:22,075
Um, and then she said something to you.
101
00:03:22,142 --> 00:03:23,710
Mm. That's what I'm talking about.
102
00:03:23,777 --> 00:03:25,745
I mean,
there's like a thousand invisible things
103
00:03:25,813 --> 00:03:28,147
that I do around here that
aren't even on your radar.
104
00:03:28,215 --> 00:03:30,984
Okay, babe, I hear you.
Let me tell you what.
105
00:03:31,051 --> 00:03:33,620
Let me handle all the kids' stuff this week,
106
00:03:33,687 --> 00:03:36,456
I-including whatever it
is that Diane just said.
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- Really?
- Yes, really.
108
00:03:37,791 --> 00:03:39,826
That would be great.
I could really use a break.
109
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I know. You know, you look tired.
110
00:03:42,229 --> 00:03:43,696
I look tired, Dre?
111
00:03:43,764 --> 00:03:44,797
Mm-hmm.
112
00:03:44,865 --> 00:03:47,233
Oh, look what's here in the paper.
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00:03:47,301 --> 00:03:49,135
Your obituary.
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[School bell rings]
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Ms. Davis: Mr. Johnson!
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To what do we owe the surprise?
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Oh, well,
I-I wouldn't say it was a surprise.
118
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You know, I've been here... many times.
119
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Nuh-unh.
Daddy, you've never been here, ever.
120
00:04:01,448 --> 00:04:02,582
Uhp... shut up, boy.
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Put your bag away.
122
00:04:03,951 --> 00:04:05,985
You know,
he has a problem with his short-term memory.
123
00:04:06,053 --> 00:04:08,021
How's he doing? Is everything okay?
124
00:04:08,088 --> 00:04:09,922
You're Jack and Diane's Dad?
125
00:04:09,990 --> 00:04:11,457
Yes. I'm just dropping off cupcakes.
126
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- You're amazing!
- [Chuckles]
127
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My husband never drops off cupcakes.
128
00:04:15,462 --> 00:04:17,697
Mine either. Except in his mouth.
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00:04:17,765 --> 00:04:19,098
Fatty.
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00:04:19,166 --> 00:04:21,000
Oh. [Chuckles] All right,
nice seeing you, ladies.
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00:04:21,068 --> 00:04:22,301
Uh, I must be going.
132
00:04:22,369 --> 00:04:24,103
Oh, no, no, no! Stay, stay!
133
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Dads never make cupcakes.
134
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Well, I didn't make these.
135
00:04:27,608 --> 00:04:29,142
You know, these are store-bought.
136
00:04:29,209 --> 00:04:30,143
[Gasps] Oh!
137
00:04:30,210 --> 00:04:31,511
Boy: I love store-bought!
138
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Which is... much more expensive
than homemade cupcakes.
139
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[Chuckles] Great!
140
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Maybe I can stay for a minute.
141
00:04:38,986 --> 00:04:40,720
- Who wants some cupcakes?
- [Kids cheering]
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Dre: Oh!
143
00:04:42,189 --> 00:04:44,023
If I had known that
bringing in some cupcakes
144
00:04:44,091 --> 00:04:45,858
would get me treated like a rock star,
145
00:04:45,926 --> 00:04:47,660
I would've tried this
hands-on-parenting thing
146
00:04:47,728 --> 00:04:48,928
a long time ago.
147
00:04:48,996 --> 00:04:51,230
When you wish upon a star
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your dreams will take you very far,
yeah
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you're a shining star
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no matter who you are
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shining star for you to see
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what your life can truly be
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shining star for you to see
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what your life can truly be
155
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While I was killing it at school,
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00:05:13,454 --> 00:05:16,222
- I also knew I was nailing it at home.
- Aww!
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[Chuckles]
158
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[Gasps]
159
00:05:20,861 --> 00:05:23,262
Oh, my God. My fridge is chaos.
160
00:05:23,330 --> 00:05:26,399
Apples with applesauce? Chips in the fridge?
161
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Oh, my God!
162
00:05:28,869 --> 00:05:30,203
Hi. Cindee.
163
00:05:30,270 --> 00:05:32,705
I-I need you to move my heart/lung consult.
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I have a real emergency.
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[Gasps]
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Lettuce on the top shelf.
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My poor fridge.
168
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Who did this to you?
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00:05:39,813 --> 00:05:40,847
Oh!
170
00:05:40,914 --> 00:05:42,982
So, when people see mustaches now,
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they think hipster, not Hitler.
172
00:05:45,085 --> 00:05:48,254
And that, people,
is the power of creative rebranding.
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00:05:48,322 --> 00:05:51,624
Hey, guys. Sorry I'm late for
a meeting that I'm running.
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Had a thing with my kids. Nice move, bro.
175
00:05:53,694 --> 00:05:55,528
Hands-on Dad... way to go, Dre.
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00:05:55,596 --> 00:05:58,064
Family first here at Stevens & Lido.
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00:05:58,132 --> 00:06:00,399
Always. Starts and ends with the old fam-o!
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00:06:00,467 --> 00:06:01,667
Give me a minute to get things together.
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00:06:01,735 --> 00:06:02,869
Sorry I'm late. My kid was sick.
180
00:06:02,936 --> 00:06:04,804
It took me forever to get out of the house.
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00:06:07,941 --> 00:06:09,609
Ah. No problem.
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A little heads-up next time would be great,
Candace.
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00:06:13,514 --> 00:06:15,548
Wow. [Sighs]
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00:06:15,616 --> 00:06:18,538
Candace, you're better than this.
185
00:06:18,638 --> 00:06:21,673
It turned out to be a good
day to be a Dad who cared.
186
00:06:21,741 --> 00:06:24,143
Everywhere I went,people were bringing the love.
187
00:06:24,210 --> 00:06:26,712
I've been receiving e-mails
about my cupcakes all day.
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00:06:26,780 --> 00:06:28,413
"Thanks for stepping up today."
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You're welcome.
190
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"You made everybody's day."
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I try.
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Hey, "best cupcakes ever."
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They were tasty.
194
00:06:35,722 --> 00:06:37,589
That's a lot of e-mails
for a tray of cupcakes.
195
00:06:37,657 --> 00:06:39,124
- Mommy, mommy, look!
- Hey, sweetie.
196
00:06:39,192 --> 00:06:40,993
The whole class made Dad "thank you" cards!
197
00:06:41,060 --> 00:06:42,594
They're calling him "Cupcake Man."
198
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What?!
199
00:06:43,663 --> 00:06:44,730
No!
200
00:06:44,798 --> 00:06:47,733
"Number-one Dad. We love you, Mr. J."
201
00:06:47,801 --> 00:06:49,568
And you're wearing a cape in this one.
202
00:06:49,636 --> 00:06:50,836
- I am Cupcake Man.
- Right.
203
00:06:50,904 --> 00:06:52,671
Yeah, saving the world through cupcakes
204
00:06:52,739 --> 00:06:54,206
that I bought at a liquor store.
205
00:06:54,274 --> 00:06:55,507
Ha ha! [Claps hands]
206
00:06:55,575 --> 00:06:56,675
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
207
00:06:56,743 --> 00:06:58,710
Liquor-store cupcakes, and you're a hero?
208
00:06:58,778 --> 00:06:59,711
Yes.
209
00:06:59,779 --> 00:07:01,280
I made those ungrateful runts quiche
210
00:07:01,347 --> 00:07:03,115
with green eggs and ham for Dr. Seuss day,
211
00:07:03,183 --> 00:07:05,150
and I got nothing... nothing!
212
00:07:05,218 --> 00:07:06,552
I could see she was upset,
213
00:07:06,619 --> 00:07:08,821
and all I had to do
to make her feel better
214
00:07:08,888 --> 00:07:11,290
was to tell her how much I appreciate her.
215
00:07:11,357 --> 00:07:12,958
Well, babe...
216
00:07:13,026 --> 00:07:15,360
Everyone can't be Cupcake Man.
217
00:07:15,428 --> 00:07:17,796
When I say "cup," you say "cake"
218
00:07:17,864 --> 00:07:20,306
- Cup! Cup!
- Both: Cake! Cake!
219
00:07:20,406 --> 00:07:22,073
When I say "cup," you say "cake"
220
00:07:22,141 --> 00:07:23,742
- Cup! Cup!
- Cake! Cake!
221
00:07:23,809 --> 00:07:24,876
Do the birdie! Come on!
222
00:07:24,944 --> 00:07:25,910
Un-freakin'-believable.
223
00:07:25,978 --> 00:07:27,078
Do the birdie down the hall!
224
00:07:27,146 --> 00:07:28,113
Do the birdie!
225
00:07:28,180 --> 00:07:29,347
Do the sheneneh!
226
00:07:29,415 --> 00:07:31,616
Mm! Walk with it! Roll with it!
227
00:07:31,684 --> 00:07:33,184
Dummy did it again, man!
228
00:07:33,252 --> 00:07:34,753
Mm. This time, he's gonna die.
229
00:07:39,341 --> 00:07:41,873
I thought for day 2 of stepping up,
230
00:07:41,973 --> 00:07:43,807
I'd build on my success as Cupcake Man
231
00:07:43,875 --> 00:07:47,077
and introduce my new alter ego,Pancake Guy.
232
00:07:47,145 --> 00:07:50,147
Who wants some
extra-chocolate-chip pancakes?
233
00:07:50,215 --> 00:07:51,815
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
234
00:07:51,883 --> 00:07:53,250
Oh, syrup for breakfast.
235
00:07:53,318 --> 00:07:55,552
What's next... uh, diabetes for dinner?
236
00:07:55,620 --> 00:07:56,520
Unh-unh!
237
00:07:56,588 --> 00:07:59,233
Those... are mine.
238
00:07:59,333 --> 00:08:01,468
Dre: Hey, guys,
I'm glad you like my pancakes,
239
00:08:01,536 --> 00:08:03,670
but I hear your mother
coming down the stairs,
240
00:08:03,738 --> 00:08:06,306
so please,
let's try not to make too big a deal
241
00:08:06,374 --> 00:08:08,275
out of what's clearly a big deal.
242
00:08:08,342 --> 00:08:09,910
- Good morning!
- Pops: Good morning.
243
00:08:09,977 --> 00:08:11,378
- Dre: Hey, babe.
- Hi. Wow.
244
00:08:11,445 --> 00:08:13,580
- Dad made chocolate-chip pancakes.
- Out of diabetes.
245
00:08:13,648 --> 00:08:14,781
Wow! That's a treat.
246
00:08:14,849 --> 00:08:16,082
They look delicious.
247
00:08:16,150 --> 00:08:17,484
Mm... they're okay.
248
00:08:17,552 --> 00:08:19,152
Hm. You guys, go get your book bags.
249
00:08:19,220 --> 00:08:20,520
Yeah, go get your book bags.
250
00:08:20,588 --> 00:08:21,888
- Hey, babe?
- Yes?
251
00:08:21,956 --> 00:08:24,224
I just want to say I'm
sorry about last night.
252
00:08:24,292 --> 00:08:25,425
Oh.
253
00:08:25,493 --> 00:08:27,661
I did get caught up in all of the attention.
254
00:08:27,728 --> 00:08:29,563
I was just mainly frustrated
'cause I feel like
255
00:08:29,630 --> 00:08:31,929
moms do everything and no one ever notices
256
00:08:32,029 --> 00:08:33,396
and then Dads do one little thing
257
00:08:33,464 --> 00:08:34,498
- and people go crazy.
- Mm.
258
00:08:34,565 --> 00:08:36,199
But you know what I realized last night?
259
00:08:36,267 --> 00:08:38,168
That you can't drink a half
a bottle of wine in the tub
260
00:08:38,236 --> 00:08:39,236
and get out without help?
261
00:08:39,303 --> 00:08:40,437
[Both laugh]
262
00:08:40,505 --> 00:08:43,807
And that I have a very helpful husband.
263
00:08:43,875 --> 00:08:46,109
And now I have a lot more
time to enjoy myself.
264
00:08:46,177 --> 00:08:46,910
Mm. Mm.
265
00:08:46,978 --> 00:08:48,278
Mwah.
266
00:08:48,346 --> 00:08:49,212
Maybe a little bit of you later.
267
00:08:49,280 --> 00:08:50,780
Mmm. Oh!
268
00:08:50,848 --> 00:08:52,082
I was enjoying my breakfast over here.
269
00:08:52,149 --> 00:08:54,824
By the way,
these health forms need to go in today,
270
00:08:54,924 --> 00:08:56,077
and if you want, I can fill it out
271
00:08:56,177 --> 00:08:57,091
'cause I've got it down to a science.
272
00:08:57,191 --> 00:08:57,857
Babe.
273
00:08:57,925 --> 00:08:58,591
What? I got it.
274
00:08:58,659 --> 00:08:59,959
Well, I could... hey!
275
00:09:00,027 --> 00:09:01,027
I got it.
276
00:09:01,095 --> 00:09:02,429
[Singsong voice] Okay, great.
277
00:09:02,496 --> 00:09:03,763
- Now go enjoy yourself.
- Okay.
278
00:09:03,831 --> 00:09:05,064
Mm.
279
00:09:05,132 --> 00:09:06,933
You are not a very smart man, son.
280
00:09:07,001 --> 00:09:07,801
What?
281
00:09:07,868 --> 00:09:09,202
This whole "freaky Friday"
282
00:09:09,270 --> 00:09:10,937
role-reversal thing you got going on.
283
00:09:11,005 --> 00:09:13,973
Dads and moms have different
roles for a very good reason.
284
00:09:14,041 --> 00:09:16,109
When I was married to your mother,
for example,
285
00:09:16,177 --> 00:09:17,410
- I was the provider.
- Mm-hmm.
286
00:09:17,478 --> 00:09:19,045
She, the unquenchable bonfire
287
00:09:19,113 --> 00:09:21,080
that consumed my time, money, and youth.
288
00:09:21,148 --> 00:09:23,550
Pops, Bow and I are different.
We help each other.
289
00:09:23,617 --> 00:09:25,351
Oh. You heard what she said, now?
290
00:09:25,419 --> 00:09:28,048
[Singsong voice] Okay, great!
291
00:09:28,148 --> 00:09:29,515
In that cartoon-princess voice.
292
00:09:29,582 --> 00:09:31,216
When a woman says that, she's not happy.
293
00:09:31,284 --> 00:09:33,285
She doesn't like this new
setup you got arranged,
294
00:09:33,353 --> 00:09:34,920
and you're not gonna like it, either.
295
00:09:34,988 --> 00:09:36,516
How are you gonna tell me how I feel, man?
296
00:09:36,616 --> 00:09:38,899
Pops, I'm fine.
297
00:09:38,999 --> 00:09:40,666
Okay, Captain Cupcake or Mr. Pancake...
298
00:09:40,734 --> 00:09:42,101
Whatever you call yourself.
299
00:09:42,169 --> 00:09:43,836
It's "Pancake Guy."
300
00:09:43,904 --> 00:09:45,304
Or... "Pancake Dude."
301
00:09:45,372 --> 00:09:46,739
I ain't figured out which one it is yet,
but it's gonna be...
302
00:09:46,807 --> 00:09:47,740
Well, make up your mind!
303
00:09:47,808 --> 00:09:49,175
Who cares what pops said?
304
00:09:49,243 --> 00:09:51,778
I was looking forward
to what kind of props
305
00:09:51,845 --> 00:09:53,046
I was gonna get today.
306
00:09:53,113 --> 00:09:55,014
Boom! Filled out those health forms for you.
307
00:09:55,082 --> 00:09:56,215
Oh, great. Thank you.
308
00:09:56,283 --> 00:09:57,216
And?
309
00:09:57,284 --> 00:09:58,718
And what?
310
00:09:58,786 --> 00:10:00,408
Uh, well, you know,
there were a lot of little boxes there
311
00:10:00,508 --> 00:10:02,275
that required some very fine printing.
312
00:10:02,343 --> 00:10:03,543
- Okay.
- You're welcome.
313
00:10:03,611 --> 00:10:06,140
You know, just trying to go that extra mile.
314
00:10:06,240 --> 00:10:08,041
By doing what's mandatory?
315
00:10:08,109 --> 00:10:09,909
Uh... w... hey, that's me!
316
00:10:09,977 --> 00:10:11,011
Hey, come here.
317
00:10:11,078 --> 00:10:12,245
- Hey, Ms. Davis!
- Hey, kids!
318
00:10:12,313 --> 00:10:13,179
Hey, uh...
319
00:10:13,247 --> 00:10:14,748
Oh, hey, everybody!
320
00:10:14,815 --> 00:10:16,116
It's Cupcake Man.
321
00:10:16,183 --> 00:10:17,517
[All gasp] Hey, Jack's Dad!
322
00:10:17,585 --> 00:10:18,818
What did you bring today?
323
00:10:18,886 --> 00:10:20,186
Health forms!
324
00:10:20,254 --> 00:10:21,254
[Kids groan]
325
00:10:21,322 --> 00:10:24,491
Ms. Davis: Okay, everybody circle up!
326
00:10:24,558 --> 00:10:27,193
Today,
we're starting our unit on Harriet Tubman.
327
00:10:27,261 --> 00:10:28,495
Oh, oh, oh, hey, hey, hey.
328
00:10:28,562 --> 00:10:30,130
Speaking of going the extra mile,
329
00:10:30,197 --> 00:10:32,565
if you need a little extra
help with H-Tubs here,
330
00:10:32,633 --> 00:10:33,700
I'm your guy.
331
00:10:33,768 --> 00:10:35,969
W-why do you think I need extra help?
332
00:10:36,037 --> 00:10:38,171
Well, because I'm...
333
00:10:38,239 --> 00:10:40,915
And you're...
334
00:10:41,015 --> 00:10:44,084
A doctoral candidate in American history
335
00:10:44,152 --> 00:10:46,386
with a concentration in the civil war?
336
00:10:46,454 --> 00:10:49,523
Who happens to be...
337
00:10:49,591 --> 00:10:51,458
First in her class?
338
00:10:51,526 --> 00:10:52,893
Uh, who is also...
339
00:10:52,961 --> 00:10:54,728
Published?
340
00:10:54,796 --> 00:10:56,763
Very white. I'm sorry.
341
00:10:56,831 --> 00:10:58,398
Oh. I'm not. Being white is awesome.
342
00:10:58,466 --> 00:11:01,368
I study American history, so I should know.
343
00:11:01,436 --> 00:11:02,369
[Chuckles]
344
00:11:02,437 --> 00:11:03,637
I'm kidding. We're the worst.
345
00:11:03,705 --> 00:11:05,105
- Oh.
- Okay!
346
00:11:05,173 --> 00:11:06,006
Slavery!
347
00:11:09,978 --> 00:11:11,912
That cupcake glory didn't last long, did it?
348
00:11:11,980 --> 00:11:13,580
I remember my first high.
349
00:11:13,648 --> 00:11:16,116
I made homemade cotton
candy for spring carnival.
350
00:11:16,184 --> 00:11:17,551
I thought the praise would never end.
351
00:11:17,619 --> 00:11:18,719
I quit my day job.
352
00:11:18,786 --> 00:11:20,320
I'm sorry. You are...?
353
00:11:20,388 --> 00:11:22,930
- Stacy Kang-Nussbaum.
- Yeah, okay.
354
00:11:23,030 --> 00:11:24,497
Let me tell you what's gonna happen here.
355
00:11:24,564 --> 00:11:26,732
The more you do,
the more you get taken for granted,
356
00:11:26,800 --> 00:11:28,300
so don't bother to buckle up.
357
00:11:28,368 --> 00:11:30,436
It's a slow ride to nowhere.
358
00:11:30,504 --> 00:11:32,371
Thank you, but I'm good.
359
00:11:33,674 --> 00:11:35,174
Oh, you think so?!
360
00:11:35,242 --> 00:11:36,976
So, it's a fairly routine procedure,
361
00:11:37,044 --> 00:11:38,711
uh, but with your medical history,
362
00:11:38,779 --> 00:11:40,413
there is a significant risk for...
363
00:11:40,480 --> 00:11:41,981
- [Cellphone ringing]
- I'm sorry.
364
00:11:42,049 --> 00:11:43,582
Just give me one second, if you would.
365
00:11:43,650 --> 00:11:45,017
Oh, it's my daughter. [Laughs]
366
00:11:45,085 --> 00:11:45,851
Hey, baby.
367
00:11:45,919 --> 00:11:46,952
Zoey: Hey, mom.
368
00:11:47,020 --> 00:11:47,720
Hey!
369
00:11:47,788 --> 00:11:49,021
I forgot my gym bag.
370
00:11:49,089 --> 00:11:51,657
Oh! Never mind... force of habit.
371
00:11:51,725 --> 00:11:53,125
- I'll call Dad.
- [Cellphone beeps]
372
00:11:53,193 --> 00:11:54,360
I'd be happy to... [sighs]
373
00:11:54,428 --> 00:11:57,391
- [Cellphone beeps]
- Okay, where were we?
374
00:11:57,491 --> 00:11:58,824
Uh, let's see here...
375
00:11:58,892 --> 00:12:00,660
Blah, blah, "significant risk."
376
00:12:00,727 --> 00:12:02,061
You'll be fine.
377
00:12:02,129 --> 00:12:03,296
Just, I'm gonna... thanks.
378
00:12:03,363 --> 00:12:04,931
You can go.
379
00:12:04,998 --> 00:12:08,801
So, while I was plotting my
next move as an involved Dad,
380
00:12:08,869 --> 00:12:10,803
Bow had free time to enjoy herself,
381
00:12:10,871 --> 00:12:12,738
which is not always easy for Bow.
382
00:12:12,806 --> 00:12:13,773
[Both laugh]
383
00:12:16,476 --> 00:12:17,944
Hey, babies.
384
00:12:18,011 --> 00:12:19,745
Need any help with your spelling words?
385
00:12:19,813 --> 00:12:21,547
Nope. Dad already quizzed us.
386
00:12:21,615 --> 00:12:22,648
We don't need you.
387
00:12:22,716 --> 00:12:23,449
Oh.
388
00:12:23,517 --> 00:12:24,717
[Knock on door]
389
00:12:24,785 --> 00:12:26,352
Knock-knock.
390
00:12:26,420 --> 00:12:27,853
Hey!
391
00:12:27,921 --> 00:12:31,057
Want to go hit a bunch of balls?
392
00:12:31,124 --> 00:12:32,425
What does that mean?
393
00:12:32,492 --> 00:12:33,759
I don't know.
394
00:12:33,827 --> 00:12:37,096
It just seems like something
I've heard people say, so...
395
00:12:37,164 --> 00:12:38,431
Is that...
396
00:12:38,498 --> 00:12:39,231
No.
397
00:12:39,299 --> 00:12:40,266
Okay.
398
00:12:44,771 --> 00:12:46,038
Hey.
399
00:12:46,106 --> 00:12:47,239
Hey.
400
00:12:47,307 --> 00:12:50,409
I was just wondering if,
you know, you want to...
401
00:12:50,477 --> 00:12:54,180
Just talk about anything... special...
402
00:12:54,247 --> 00:12:56,482
You know, just girl-to-girl.
403
00:12:57,851 --> 00:12:59,118
Gross.
404
00:13:00,721 --> 00:13:01,821
Okay.
405
00:13:08,140 --> 00:13:11,717
For me,
day 2 of stepping up had not gone as planned.
406
00:13:11,817 --> 00:13:13,473
I needed to really bring it tomorrow
407
00:13:13,573 --> 00:13:14,867
if I was gonna stay in the game.
408
00:13:14,967 --> 00:13:17,969
Need a win here, Dre.
Back's against the wall, bruh.
409
00:13:18,037 --> 00:13:19,203
Hey!
410
00:13:19,271 --> 00:13:22,006
So, the kids are busy,
and I'm not doing anything,
411
00:13:22,074 --> 00:13:23,574
so I was wondering...
412
00:13:23,642 --> 00:13:25,877
Are you hand-grinding cornmeal?
413
00:13:25,944 --> 00:13:28,613
Yeah, babe.
This corn bread's got to be spectacular.
414
00:13:28,681 --> 00:13:30,548
It's for the Harriet Tubman
presentation tomorrow,
415
00:13:30,616 --> 00:13:32,317
and I will not be ignored.
416
00:13:32,384 --> 00:13:34,585
Well, it looks great.
417
00:13:34,653 --> 00:13:36,621
You know what else looks great?
418
00:13:38,657 --> 00:13:40,224
Like that? Yeah.
419
00:13:40,292 --> 00:13:41,893
I like that. I like it. Babe...
420
00:13:41,960 --> 00:13:44,894
Hey, babe, you know,
that teacher was mean to me.
421
00:13:44,994 --> 00:13:46,628
I filled the hell out of those forms,
422
00:13:46,695 --> 00:13:48,763
and she's like, "good. Get out."
423
00:13:48,831 --> 00:13:50,098
Like I didn't even exist.
424
00:13:50,165 --> 00:13:51,165
Mm.
425
00:13:51,233 --> 00:13:52,467
Well, if you're not in the mood,
426
00:13:52,534 --> 00:13:54,002
you can just... [clicks tongue]
427
00:13:55,604 --> 00:13:57,038
[Clicks tongue]
428
00:13:57,106 --> 00:13:58,439
Babe... huh?
429
00:13:58,507 --> 00:13:59,540
I'm baking.
430
00:13:59,608 --> 00:14:01,843
[Indistinct conversations]
431
00:14:01,910 --> 00:14:03,077
Hey!
432
00:14:03,145 --> 00:14:06,514
Guess who made authentic,
hand-ground corn bread.
433
00:14:06,582 --> 00:14:08,349
O...Kay. Just put it over there, Dre.
434
00:14:08,417 --> 00:14:11,252
Mr. Kinnebrew made kettle corn for everyone.
435
00:14:11,320 --> 00:14:13,054
You rock, Glen!
436
00:14:13,122 --> 00:14:15,776
I'm just doing my part for
the Harriet Tubman experience.
437
00:14:15,876 --> 00:14:17,177
[Chuckles]
438
00:14:17,244 --> 00:14:18,711
- Here you go. Go get 'em!
- [Chuckles]
439
00:14:18,779 --> 00:14:19,846
Who's the showboat?
440
00:14:19,914 --> 00:14:21,014
Some jackass Dad.
441
00:14:21,082 --> 00:14:23,183
No one's even noticed my cardboard replica
442
00:14:23,250 --> 00:14:24,918
of Harriet Tubman's one-room cabin.
443
00:14:24,985 --> 00:14:26,419
If you look in the window,
444
00:14:26,487 --> 00:14:29,022
there's a tiny marzipan
map of Canada on the wall.
445
00:14:29,090 --> 00:14:30,824
Woman, what the hell are you talking about?
446
00:14:30,891 --> 00:14:32,325
It's aspirational.
447
00:14:33,260 --> 00:14:35,361
I wanted to be gracious and rise above it,
448
00:14:35,429 --> 00:14:37,831
but as the next minute
and 37 seconds will show,
449
00:14:37,898 --> 00:14:39,799
that's not exactly how it went down.
450
00:14:39,867 --> 00:14:45,271
Okay, class,
it is time to start our special show.
451
00:14:45,339 --> 00:14:46,673
[Applause]
452
00:14:46,740 --> 00:14:51,611
Good afternoon, chil'ren.
My name is Harriet Tubman.
453
00:14:51,679 --> 00:14:54,981
I was born in 1820 in a one-room cabin...
454
00:14:55,049 --> 00:14:56,282
Look at that.
455
00:14:56,350 --> 00:14:59,729
Look at him sitting over
there like he's a prince.
456
00:14:59,829 --> 00:15:02,798
Popcorn on the underground rail road?
457
00:15:02,865 --> 00:15:04,233
Please.
458
00:15:04,300 --> 00:15:05,934
Harriet was a smart woman.
459
00:15:06,002 --> 00:15:08,303
She wouldn't blow the whole
deal with some loud-ass snacks.
460
00:15:08,371 --> 00:15:09,504
Okay, Mr. Johnson. What?!
461
00:15:09,572 --> 00:15:10,620
You need to be quiet.
462
00:15:10,720 --> 00:15:12,921
You're ruining the
Harriet Tubman experience.
463
00:15:12,989 --> 00:15:14,189
- Oh, I'm ruining it?
- Yeah.
464
00:15:14,257 --> 00:15:15,657
[Scoffs] I'm here to save it.
465
00:15:15,725 --> 00:15:17,226
You're the one that's ruining it
466
00:15:17,293 --> 00:15:20,262
by allowing off-topic snacks
and spreading misinformation.
467
00:15:20,330 --> 00:15:21,630
For five whole days.
468
00:15:21,698 --> 00:15:23,532
Harriet Tubman was not a spy.
469
00:15:23,600 --> 00:15:25,167
Yes, she was!
470
00:15:25,235 --> 00:15:26,969
No, she wasn't!
471
00:15:27,036 --> 00:15:28,170
Excuse me!
472
00:15:28,238 --> 00:15:29,938
Who's talkin'?
473
00:15:30,006 --> 00:15:31,240
I am!
474
00:15:31,307 --> 00:15:33,375
Harriet,
could you help a brother out over here
475
00:15:33,443 --> 00:15:34,476
and solve something for us?
476
00:15:34,544 --> 00:15:38,265
You were never a spy, right?
477
00:15:38,365 --> 00:15:40,499
Why, yes. I was.
478
00:15:40,567 --> 00:15:41,600
What does she know?
479
00:15:41,668 --> 00:15:43,569
She ain't even the real Harriet Tubman.
480
00:15:43,637 --> 00:15:44,737
[All gasp] Oh!
481
00:15:44,805 --> 00:15:46,372
- The accusations!
- Accu... what?!
482
00:15:46,440 --> 00:15:48,974
All this rigamarole is aggravatin'
the headaches
483
00:15:49,042 --> 00:15:51,077
- what the hell is "rigamarole"?
- And dizzy spells I've had
484
00:15:51,144 --> 00:15:54,413
ever since a slave owner hit me in the head
485
00:15:54,481 --> 00:15:58,551
with an iron weight in 1835.
486
00:15:58,618 --> 00:16:00,686
Oh! [Groans]
487
00:16:00,754 --> 00:16:01,821
You're hurting Harriet Tubman!
488
00:16:01,888 --> 00:16:03,589
Boy, that is not the real Harriet Tubman!
489
00:16:03,657 --> 00:16:05,324
She said she was born in 1820!
490
00:16:05,392 --> 00:16:07,359
What's today date?! Do the math!
491
00:16:07,427 --> 00:16:09,161
[All gasp] What are y'all looking at?
492
00:16:09,229 --> 00:16:10,996
Oh. He's crazy.
493
00:16:11,064 --> 00:16:11,897
Shut up, Glen!
494
00:16:11,965 --> 00:16:13,666
You should leave!
495
00:16:13,733 --> 00:16:14,834
What?! I should leave?
496
00:16:14,901 --> 00:16:16,302
Who gave you cupcakes, huh?
497
00:16:16,369 --> 00:16:17,436
Who gave you cupcakes?!
498
00:16:19,910 --> 00:16:23,098
With a carefully worded, furious e-mail,
499
00:16:23,198 --> 00:16:25,165
I calmly let the
authorities at school know
500
00:16:25,233 --> 00:16:26,700
the injustice I had suffered.
501
00:16:26,768 --> 00:16:29,236
In many ways,
I was just like Harriet Tubman...
502
00:16:29,304 --> 00:16:31,438
The real one, not the fake-ass spy one.
503
00:16:31,506 --> 00:16:32,373
Dre!
504
00:16:32,440 --> 00:16:34,074
Kitchen, babe.
505
00:16:34,142 --> 00:16:36,644
What in the world did
you do at school today?
506
00:16:36,711 --> 00:16:38,746
I stood up for parents everywhere.
507
00:16:38,813 --> 00:16:40,948
We need to be respected and valued.
508
00:16:41,016 --> 00:16:43,717
That teacher didn't even
thank me for what I did.
509
00:16:43,785 --> 00:16:45,586
For attacking Harriet Tubman?
510
00:16:45,654 --> 00:16:47,388
What was I supposed to do?
511
00:16:47,455 --> 00:16:49,423
- Oh, my...
- Teaching our kids nonsense
512
00:16:49,491 --> 00:16:51,959
like Harriet Tubman was
a spy in the civil war.
513
00:16:52,027 --> 00:16:53,961
She was a spy.
514
00:16:54,029 --> 00:16:56,580
Her code name was "Moses."
515
00:16:56,680 --> 00:16:57,980
And how do you know this?
516
00:16:58,048 --> 00:17:00,116
Because it was in the packet
that Ms. Davis sent home.
517
00:17:00,183 --> 00:17:03,252
Yeah, a packet that she probably wrote!
518
00:17:03,320 --> 00:17:04,253
Oh, my God.
519
00:17:04,321 --> 00:17:06,088
You have become the crazy mom.
520
00:17:06,156 --> 00:17:07,723
You realize that, right?
521
00:17:07,791 --> 00:17:09,492
It's no longer Stacy Kang-Nussbaum.
522
00:17:09,559 --> 00:17:12,616
It's you. You're crazy mom.
523
00:17:12,716 --> 00:17:14,299
You know, if anyone's crazy, it's you.
524
00:17:14,399 --> 00:17:16,133
- What?
- Zoey told me what you did.
525
00:17:16,201 --> 00:17:19,656
You sat on her bed. Who does that?
526
00:17:19,756 --> 00:17:21,690
Okay, let's not change the subject, okay?
527
00:17:21,758 --> 00:17:24,259
No, we are talking about you.
You are a praise junkie.
528
00:17:24,327 --> 00:17:25,894
Uh...
529
00:17:25,962 --> 00:17:27,930
And you are a control freak.
530
00:17:27,997 --> 00:17:28,997
What?!
531
00:17:29,065 --> 00:17:30,399
Yes! Excuse me.
532
00:17:30,467 --> 00:17:31,967
Don't think I didn't notice
533
00:17:32,035 --> 00:17:34,069
you re-put away all the silverware.
534
00:17:34,137 --> 00:17:36,305
You told me that you wanted me to do it,
535
00:17:36,372 --> 00:17:37,506
but you don't want me to do it.
536
00:17:37,574 --> 00:17:38,907
No, no, I want you to do it.
537
00:17:38,975 --> 00:17:40,709
I just want you to do it how I do it.
538
00:17:40,777 --> 00:17:41,677
That's crazy!
539
00:17:41,745 --> 00:17:42,878
[Drawer slams] Okay, look...
540
00:17:42,946 --> 00:17:44,313
No, it's not crazy. Look, okay.
541
00:17:44,380 --> 00:17:45,914
'Cause this is the way it's supposed to be,
okay?
542
00:17:45,982 --> 00:17:48,016
It's supposed to be big fork,
little fork, big spoon, little spoon.
543
00:17:48,084 --> 00:17:49,985
You put it in here big fork, big spoon,
544
00:17:50,053 --> 00:17:52,221
little fork, little spoon... like a maniac.
545
00:17:52,288 --> 00:17:55,390
And now it's chaos all up in the drawer.
546
00:17:55,458 --> 00:17:58,360
I'm being abused for working hard,
547
00:17:58,428 --> 00:18:00,362
just like Harriet Tubman.
548
00:18:00,430 --> 00:18:01,630
Oh, no, no, no, no, no!
549
00:18:01,698 --> 00:18:04,500
Who...
Who would put a spatula with a can opener?
550
00:18:04,567 --> 00:18:05,734
Huh? Huh?
551
00:18:05,802 --> 00:18:07,936
That's a lunatic! You're a lunatic because...
552
00:18:08,004 --> 00:18:09,104
[Drawer opens]
553
00:18:09,172 --> 00:18:11,640
Mommies need to be with their babies, Dre!
554
00:18:11,708 --> 00:18:13,675
What is going on out here, son?
555
00:18:13,743 --> 00:18:15,944
I can hear you all the way
out to the guest house,
556
00:18:16,012 --> 00:18:18,046
where I am trying to
entertain a lady friend.
557
00:18:18,114 --> 00:18:21,317
Bow is being unreasonable, man.
558
00:18:21,417 --> 00:18:23,652
Bow is being a mom.
559
00:18:23,719 --> 00:18:25,787
The problem is,
you're trying to be a mom, too,
560
00:18:25,855 --> 00:18:27,422
and you're being all crazy with it,
561
00:18:27,490 --> 00:18:29,057
yelling at teachers for teaching,
562
00:18:29,125 --> 00:18:30,559
forks and spoons all Willy-Nilly.
563
00:18:30,626 --> 00:18:31,960
I-I know. Can't hand it!
564
00:18:32,028 --> 00:18:33,795
[Chuckl see, there? "Freaky Friday."
565
00:18:33,863 --> 00:18:35,897
And you didn't even get
that far into the week.
566
00:18:35,965 --> 00:18:38,366
Nothing sadder than a freaky Thursday,
son... nothing.
567
00:18:38,434 --> 00:18:41,069
Okay, pops, I get it.
I messed up, all right?
568
00:18:41,137 --> 00:18:43,004
[Sighs]
569
00:18:43,072 --> 00:18:44,606
You know what?
I-I'm just gonna go talk to Bow.
570
00:18:44,674 --> 00:18:47,542
Do that.
Lose what little dignity you have left.
571
00:18:47,610 --> 00:18:49,311
So you don't think I should say anything?
572
00:18:49,378 --> 00:18:51,913
I think sometimes talking is overrated.
573
00:18:51,981 --> 00:18:54,316
The way I see it, crazy got you in.
574
00:18:54,383 --> 00:18:55,784
Crazy can get you out.
575
00:18:58,941 --> 00:19:00,208
Later.
576
00:19:00,275 --> 00:19:02,777
Pops doesn't always make a lot of sense,
577
00:19:02,845 --> 00:19:04,645
but in this case, he was right.
578
00:19:04,713 --> 00:19:05,980
I needed to make a big move.
579
00:19:06,048 --> 00:19:08,216
Mom, will you make us breakfast?
580
00:19:08,283 --> 00:19:10,685
I can't take any more of Dad's pancakes.
581
00:19:10,752 --> 00:19:11,752
Too much sugar.
582
00:19:11,820 --> 00:19:14,222
Miss your steel-cut oatmeal.
583
00:19:14,289 --> 00:19:15,256
Well, Dad was actually...
584
00:19:15,324 --> 00:19:17,024
It's... so good.
585
00:19:17,092 --> 00:19:18,826
We hate flavor.
586
00:19:19,828 --> 00:19:21,996
Okay, babies. I'll make you breakfast.
587
00:19:22,064 --> 00:19:23,998
[Refrigerator door opens]
588
00:19:25,667 --> 00:19:27,301
Hey... mom? Mm-hmm?
589
00:19:27,369 --> 00:19:29,303
I'm... really looking forward
590
00:19:29,371 --> 00:19:32,440
to spending some more
time with you... together.
591
00:19:32,508 --> 00:19:33,674
Oh. Wha...
592
00:19:33,742 --> 00:19:34,742
That's so nice...
593
00:19:34,810 --> 00:19:36,110
And a little strange.
594
00:19:39,882 --> 00:19:41,149
Go!
595
00:19:41,216 --> 00:19:42,850
Hey, mom.
596
00:19:43,986 --> 00:19:46,587
You want to... sit on my bed later?
597
00:19:46,655 --> 00:19:47,688
Wha... sure.
598
00:19:47,756 --> 00:19:48,890
Awesome.
599
00:19:48,957 --> 00:19:51,025
Okay.
600
00:19:51,093 --> 00:19:52,393
[Yawns]
601
00:19:52,461 --> 00:19:53,995
Good morning, everybody!
602
00:19:54,062 --> 00:19:56,964
Dad, do you mind if mom takes
us to school this morning?
603
00:19:57,032 --> 00:19:59,100
Son,
that's what this whole week was about...
604
00:19:59,168 --> 00:20:00,501
Giving your mother a break.
605
00:20:00,569 --> 00:20:02,537
Please? It's so slow and safe.
606
00:20:02,604 --> 00:20:06,572
We love listening to your books on tape.
607
00:20:06,672 --> 00:20:07,772
What? It's...
608
00:20:07,839 --> 00:20:09,940
RainBow: Really, babe? What?
609
00:20:10,008 --> 00:20:11,876
You could've at least had
them rehearse a little more.
610
00:20:11,943 --> 00:20:13,177
That was like some really bad theater.
611
00:20:13,245 --> 00:20:14,712
[Chuckles] I know.
612
00:20:14,780 --> 00:20:17,214
So,
you want things to go back the way they were?
613
00:20:17,282 --> 00:20:18,582
- Maybe a little.
- [Laughs]
614
00:20:18,650 --> 00:20:20,418
It's not as easy as you thought, is it?
615
00:20:20,485 --> 00:20:22,386
- No, it's not, babe. You know what?
- No.
616
00:20:22,454 --> 00:20:24,855
To hell with being the unsung hero.
I want to be sung.
617
00:20:24,923 --> 00:20:25,990
[Laughs]
618
00:20:26,058 --> 00:20:27,458
Well, as much as I hate to admit it,
619
00:20:27,526 --> 00:20:30,394
I actually miss doing the little things.
620
00:20:30,462 --> 00:20:33,764
And it kind of burns off
my working-mom guilt.
621
00:20:33,832 --> 00:20:35,366
Just sayin'.
622
00:20:35,434 --> 00:20:36,367
Babe, babe.
623
00:20:36,435 --> 00:20:37,435
Hmm?
624
00:20:37,502 --> 00:20:39,870
I appreciate everything that you do.
625
00:20:39,938 --> 00:20:42,273
I appreciate everything you don't do.
626
00:20:42,340 --> 00:20:44,542
- [Laughs]
- Oh, hey, when you get home from work later,
627
00:20:44,609 --> 00:20:46,377
I know you might be tired,
but I was thinking
628
00:20:46,445 --> 00:20:48,212
maybe you could... [clicks tongue]
629
00:20:48,280 --> 00:20:50,915
- Oh. You gonna sneak me in the
underground rail road? - Mm-hmm.
630
00:20:50,982 --> 00:20:53,117
You be Harriet Tubman.
I'll be Frederick douglass.
631
00:20:53,185 --> 00:20:54,251
- Done!
- All right. Ha ha!
632
00:20:54,319 --> 00:20:55,419
Done! Done!
633
00:20:55,487 --> 00:20:57,254
- Let me get the wig.
- Oh! [Laughs]
634
00:21:00,896 --> 00:21:03,598
This is nice.
635
00:21:03,665 --> 00:21:05,833
I'll wash the glasses.
636
00:21:05,901 --> 00:21:07,935
Offering to do the dishes?
637
00:21:08,003 --> 00:21:10,138
You're trying to seduce me, Mr. Johnson.
638
00:21:10,205 --> 00:21:11,172
I am.
639
00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:12,840
[Laughing] Oh. Mmm.
640
00:21:14,376 --> 00:21:16,711
Dre: You know, this has a very happy ending
641
00:21:16,779 --> 00:21:18,646
if he doesn't blow it.
642
00:21:18,714 --> 00:21:21,215
Oh, no, he's gonna blow it.
643
00:21:21,283 --> 00:21:23,217
Yeah. Probably.
644
00:21:23,267 --> 00:21:27,817
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