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What the heaven?
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Previously on Black Jesus...
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Oh, my sweet lord.
4
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- Hey, mama.
- I made these for you.
5
00:00:06,879 --> 00:00:10,228
Chocolate mint pistachio
with a dash of sea salt.
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All right.
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Those are for Jesus, fat-ass.
You're a fat, bad-luck-having,
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lazy nigga like your father.
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My pit bull getting ready to have puppies.
And I wasn't there when my kids
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00:00:20,630 --> 00:00:22,476
was born, but I'm gonna
be there for my bitch.
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00:00:22,477 --> 00:00:24,144
So what was the big
emergency last night?
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00:00:24,145 --> 00:00:26,004
These idiots broke into the Compton
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boarding stables last night.
And then they left the gates
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open, and three or four horses got out.
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00:00:30,684 --> 00:00:32,666
Oh, we've been getting calls
from all over Compton.
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Go over to Fish's house, look
around and find my shoes.
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Sounds dangerous. [Burps]
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- What do I get?
- Macaroni and cheese, nigga.
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I go get them shoes,
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I want three nights in the bed.
You sleep on the couch.
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I think I'm gonna start
my three days right now.
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What is the thread count in these sheets?
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[Glass shatters]
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[Grunts] Oh, peace.
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[Bleep] Nigga can't have no luxury
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around this mother [Bleep]
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Sync and corrections by awaqeded
- www.addic7ed.com -
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Attention all complex residents!
All residents to the courtyard!
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The hell is your problem, man?
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Yeah, you too, convict. Over here.
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Got some tragic news.
Had a little act of vandalism
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00:02:05,901 --> 00:02:08,352
last night. Somebody broke into my
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00:02:08,353 --> 00:02:12,356
priceless, mint-condition
Oldsmobile cutlass supreme.
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00:02:12,357 --> 00:02:14,503
- My cutlass!
- Oh, I can't believe this.
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00:02:14,504 --> 00:02:15,359
That's terrible.
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Hey, maybe somebody was
trying to air that bitch out
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from all that fruity-ass, warm vanilla
bean body splash you be wearing.
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And maybe some bitch-ass
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parolee did it because he was bored
'cause he ain't have shit of his own.
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00:02:25,893 --> 00:02:27,038
Huh, yeah.
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00:02:27,039 --> 00:02:29,644
And I want to find out
who [Bleep] with my car.
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And if anybody got any
information, you bring it
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directly to me, okay?
Don't go to the police.
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Bring it to me. I'm gonna
handle it personally.
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I got some information.
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You know who broke in my car?
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Yeah, man. I was in the van all night.
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00:02:43,677 --> 00:02:46,521
- I seen that shit, dawg.
- So you know who broke my window?
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00:02:46,522 --> 00:02:47,342
Yeah.
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00:02:47,343 --> 00:02:50,257
But you know I can't tell you,
Vic, 'cause I'm like you, brah.
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I ain't no snitch.
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Well, I ain't the police, so
technically, you ain't snitching.
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Look, Vic, you and I
both know that if I gave
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00:02:56,985 --> 00:02:59,737
up the ghost on who broke in
your car, you gonna be out here
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trying to whoop somebody's ass,
man, and don't nobody need to
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00:03:02,290 --> 00:03:03,893
- get hurt, brah.
- Hey, you mess with my
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car, somebody got to get hurt.
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00:03:05,524 --> 00:03:07,697
Pop's worried about you, man.
You need to learn how to let
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00:03:07,698 --> 00:03:09,800
some of that stuff go, man. You
gonna mess around and bust a
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blood vessel or something, man.
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Me and you got a problem.
You know what that is?
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The word respect.
Yeah, you don't respect me.
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00:03:17,089 --> 00:03:19,340
Oh, come on, Vic. He
just messing with you.
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He don't know who did it.
You know he's on that stuff...
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that lean, that codeine,
them mollies, PCP, LBJ, JFK.
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I respect you, Vic.
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No, you don't. But you will.
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Hey, bother, what's up?
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- What's up man?
- Mm-hmm, that's right. Take it all.
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00:03:39,778 --> 00:03:42,163
I want all of this shit right
here, I want it out of my house.
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00:03:42,164 --> 00:03:43,270
Yes, Ms. Tudi.
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And you... I can't even look at you.
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Mom, I'm telling you, I paid!
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Tell the folks that's about to carry
your deadbeat ass off to jail.
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That's who you tell, 'cause
I don't want to hear it.
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00:03:53,971 --> 00:03:55,724
Hey, baby. How you doing?
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You know that this bitch is out here
trying to catch him having shit?
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00:03:59,047 --> 00:04:02,014
Hiding in the bushes, taking pictures.
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00:04:02,015 --> 00:04:03,181
Oh, hell no.
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00:04:03,182 --> 00:04:04,387
Unh-unh.
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00:04:04,569 --> 00:04:07,856
Hey, jee, I know I messed
up on a lot of stuff, man.
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00:04:07,857 --> 00:04:10,745
But, you know, I'm telling you,
I look out for my kids, man.
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Man, I feel you, my brother.
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Know what I'm saying?
I knew the day would come when
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she would try to destroy my dream.
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00:04:15,530 --> 00:04:18,948
Yet somehow that didn't stop you
from knocking her up twice.
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00:04:18,949 --> 00:04:19,681
Shut up.
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You the only light-skinned girl
got to wait in line at the club.
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00:04:23,038 --> 00:04:24,324
Hey, Boon, don't even trip, man.
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00:04:24,325 --> 00:04:25,905
These is only worldly possessions.
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That ain't your future, man.
That's your past.
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Your babies is your future, dawg.
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Just like his father.
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Just a fat, stupid, lazy
deadbeat like his father, down
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to that ugly-ass track suit.
And, by the way, ain't never
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- seen a track a day in his life.
- [Laughing]
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- Hey, Ms. Tudi right.
- [Laughter]
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Do you have any idea how much
product I move out of this house?
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Last thing I need is for that
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00:04:51,680 --> 00:04:54,882
bitch and her attorney to be
snooping around here.
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00:04:54,883 --> 00:04:56,761
Mom, that little bit of
weed you selling, ain't
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nobody tripping on that.
And I'm telling you, Shalinka is
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- not taking me to jail.
- That bitch is mean.
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Why he like mean bitches, huh?
Can somebody tell me what he saw
105
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in her in the first place?
All she did was put you down and
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curse you out.
Stupid-ass mother [Bleep]
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- Hey, Boon...
- That's my mama
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talking to me like that.
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And she right. You better quit playing
with that girl, Shalinka, man.
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She gonna have you up under
that county jail, man.
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Look man, I paid. I swear I paid.
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I can look in your heart
and know you telling
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the truth about paying the
bread, man, but why is she on
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your bumper so tough?
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Well, see here's the thing, man.
We're not together anymore.
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I gave the money to the kids.
I'm not giving Shalinka any money.
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She's bad with money.
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If I'm not sleeping with her no more,
I'm not getting her weave done anymore.
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Best to leave the car unlocked.
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I see a car unlocked, I take
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their change and don't bust up anything.
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00:05:50,575 --> 00:05:52,868
Got to be able to spot the warning signs.
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00:05:53,127 --> 00:05:56,192
David Koresh, Jim Jones...
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That boy is a cult leader.
My window got busted last night.
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00:06:02,420 --> 00:06:06,358
Probably some kind of strange initiation
for one of his brainwashed followers.
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Probably.
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Let them come back tonight.
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'Cause tonight, you gonna
be watching my car.
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- I am?
- Yeah, I got $5, and I
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00:06:12,997 --> 00:06:15,560
got a sleeping bag you can set
up right here on the sidewalk.
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I don't know about that.
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00:06:16,631 --> 00:06:17,903
What you mean you don't
know about that?
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You're a bum. You sleep on
the sidewalk all the time.
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But tonight I'm not a bum.
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00:06:21,082 --> 00:06:22,719
I'm a security professional.
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00:06:22,720 --> 00:06:25,159
In order for me to do my job,
I got to sleep in the car.
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00:06:25,160 --> 00:06:26,652
No way you're sleeping
in my car, Lloyd.
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00:06:26,653 --> 00:06:29,280
But if someone sees me on the sidewalk,
they know I'm watching the car.
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If I'm sleeping in the car, I
can catch anybody red-handed.
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00:06:32,396 --> 00:06:34,175
I let you sleep in my house once.
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Smelled like ass for days.
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Let me give you a deal.
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Let me sleep in your car, you
don't have to pay me.
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00:06:40,365 --> 00:06:43,127
Okay, fine. You sleep in the car.
145
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We're gonna start with 10
days up front, all right?
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00:06:45,201 --> 00:06:46,526
- 10 days, perfect.
- Yeah.
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00:06:46,527 --> 00:06:48,685
Your ass gonna sleep on some plastic, too.
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All right, plastic. I don't care.
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Right on the plastic.
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00:06:53,167 --> 00:06:56,473
Tell you something else, too.
If you got to pass gas, you get
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out the car. You pass
gas outside the car.
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Outside on the sidewalk.
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- No farting in my car.
- No farting. Deal?
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00:07:02,604 --> 00:07:04,744
Deal. And pull your hand back.
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00:07:04,745 --> 00:07:08,030
- It smells like bum ball juice.
- Bum ball juice?
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00:07:08,031 --> 00:07:09,439
Horse shit.
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00:07:12,540 --> 00:07:14,758
[Rap music plays]
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Hey! What up?! [Laughing]
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Boon-Boon and boolinka!
Ooh! What's up?
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00:07:26,338 --> 00:07:28,762
[Laughs] Hey, well, you happy?
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I'm selling everything that I got.
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00:07:30,335 --> 00:07:33,260
I see you ain't selling
your fancy track suits.
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What? You want the
track suit off my back?
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00:07:35,680 --> 00:07:38,065
Hell, no. You look like a mountain dew in
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that track suit.
Man, you need to be happy.
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All this to pay you child
support that I already paid.
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00:07:45,553 --> 00:07:47,149
Don't give me that bull, Boonie.
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00:07:47,150 --> 00:07:50,350
And by the way, your check bounced again.
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00:07:50,351 --> 00:07:52,605
I knew the check was gonna bounce.
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00:07:52,606 --> 00:07:56,258
I gave both of the kids
$200 apiece last month.
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00:07:56,259 --> 00:07:59,024
Hey, tell your mama how
much money I gave you.
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Both: $10.
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What? Tell the truth! Don't lie.
174
00:08:01,352 --> 00:08:04,145
- Now, I gave you more than $10.
- You're pathetic.
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00:08:04,146 --> 00:08:06,898
- It's the truth!
- Even if it was the truth,
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which it ain't, what kind of idiot
would give little kids $400 in cash?
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A highly intelligent idiot like me.
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00:08:15,229 --> 00:08:17,011
Move. You get on my nerves. Move.
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00:08:17,012 --> 00:08:18,055
Ain't nobody invite you in here.
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00:08:18,056 --> 00:08:18,680
All y'all move.
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I'm taking pictures. I'm
just taking pictures to see
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where my money at.
And I know what I'm doing.
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00:08:24,562 --> 00:08:26,613
Oh, no, no, no.
Actually, I don't want any
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00:08:26,614 --> 00:08:28,461
pictures taken of me, so if
you could just delete that?
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00:08:28,462 --> 00:08:31,802
Why don't you delete the part
of your brain that told you you
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00:08:31,803 --> 00:08:35,072
could boss me around, bitch?!
Think you better than me 'cause
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00:08:35,073 --> 00:08:37,241
- [bleep] My leftovers?!
- Oh, oh, oh, oh!
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00:08:37,242 --> 00:08:38,761
Come on, we got kids right here, y'all.
189
00:08:38,762 --> 00:08:40,602
- Come on, come on, come on, kids.
- Uh, no.
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00:08:40,603 --> 00:08:42,398
There's been a huge misunderstanding.
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00:08:42,399 --> 00:08:46,750
There is no, no way that I am
doing anything with him, so if
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00:08:46,751 --> 00:08:48,230
you could just delete that...?
193
00:08:48,231 --> 00:08:51,128
Under no circumstances would I even
consider it.
194
00:08:51,129 --> 00:08:54,424
Instagram and Facebook, bitch. Oh, wait.
195
00:08:54,425 --> 00:08:58,645
I forgot a caption. "This
bitch like fat broke
196
00:08:58,646 --> 00:09:03,100
niggas that don't pay child
support," send, tag.
197
00:09:03,101 --> 00:09:06,329
- [Laughter]
- If the shoe fits, skank...
198
00:09:06,330 --> 00:09:07,738
Oh, come on, ladies, please.
199
00:09:07,739 --> 00:09:09,127
- Okay, that's enough.
- You know what?
200
00:09:09,128 --> 00:09:11,399
I got a shoe for your ass, bitch!
201
00:09:11,400 --> 00:09:12,112
Maggie!
202
00:09:12,113 --> 00:09:13,494
That's right.
203
00:09:13,495 --> 00:09:14,875
- It's like that?
- Run, Maggie.
204
00:09:14,876 --> 00:09:18,254
[Drum roll]
205
00:09:18,255 --> 00:09:20,667
- Maggie, no.
- So what? Take it off.
206
00:09:20,668 --> 00:09:22,503
She took the wig off, man! Run!
207
00:09:22,504 --> 00:09:25,059
- You be good. You hold that.
- I'm not scared.
208
00:09:25,060 --> 00:09:27,020
You ain't gonna throw nothing.
209
00:09:27,021 --> 00:09:30,294
- Ohh! Ooh!
- Fish, we got to do something,
210
00:09:30,295 --> 00:09:31,795
Hey, I'm on probation, man.
211
00:09:31,796 --> 00:09:33,881
Come on, ladies. Y'all cut that out.
212
00:09:33,882 --> 00:09:37,801
- Come on. What you gon...
- Ooh!
213
00:09:37,802 --> 00:09:40,216
- Stop, stop! That's enough!
- Don't think 'cause you Jesus
214
00:09:40,217 --> 00:09:43,307
- I won't whup your ass!
- Ohh!
215
00:09:43,308 --> 00:09:45,142
- Whoa!
- Oh, my God.
216
00:09:45,143 --> 00:09:49,480
- I was...
- I'm sick of you!
217
00:09:49,481 --> 00:09:51,315
What you want, Fish? What y'all want?
218
00:09:51,316 --> 00:09:52,783
You ain't talking to me.
219
00:09:52,784 --> 00:09:55,157
I'm talking to you. I don't
care if you've been locked up.
220
00:09:55,158 --> 00:09:57,154
Y'all ain't gonna do nothing!
221
00:09:57,155 --> 00:09:59,239
- Ooh!
- That's all you gonna do?
222
00:09:59,240 --> 00:10:01,240
"Ooh!" I'm holding you
under citizen's arrest.
223
00:10:01,241 --> 00:10:03,153
You ain't holding me under shit, Trayvon!
224
00:10:03,154 --> 00:10:04,411
Run!
225
00:10:04,412 --> 00:10:07,164
You ain't gonna do nothing!
You ain't got nothing!
226
00:10:07,165 --> 00:10:08,799
Shalinka! Shalinka!
227
00:10:08,800 --> 00:10:11,502
- I'm tired of your ass!
- Shalinka!
228
00:10:11,503 --> 00:10:14,471
Shalinka! Shalinka, that's a kid!
229
00:10:14,472 --> 00:10:16,390
The kid shouldn't have got into shit!
230
00:10:16,391 --> 00:10:18,592
- Jesus scared, too.
- Nobody's scared of your fat ass.
231
00:10:18,593 --> 00:10:20,477
I called the police on your ass and lied.
232
00:10:20,478 --> 00:10:22,846
And we won't see your ass no
233
00:10:22,847 --> 00:10:26,567
more, so you better get scared.
Y'all ain't about that life.
234
00:10:26,568 --> 00:10:29,353
I'm tired of it, Boonie.
It's the third month.
235
00:10:29,354 --> 00:10:32,322
You know what that means.
You better have my money in
236
00:10:32,323 --> 00:10:35,826
hours or your ass going to jail.
237
00:10:40,698 --> 00:10:45,051
Boonie, I'm sorry...
238
00:10:45,052 --> 00:10:46,474
- But you got to go.
- What?
239
00:10:46,475 --> 00:10:48,225
I don't need the police at my door.
240
00:10:48,226 --> 00:10:50,523
I'm sorry. Just go, go, go, scoot.
241
00:10:50,524 --> 00:10:52,890
Hey, come on, man. She pray to you.
242
00:10:52,891 --> 00:10:54,705
Come on, Tudi. Don't be like that.
243
00:10:54,706 --> 00:10:56,696
- Come on, now.
- Jesus, I don't want to hear it.
244
00:10:56,697 --> 00:10:58,257
You want to help?
245
00:10:58,258 --> 00:11:00,567
Then wave your Jesus wand and fix him.
246
00:11:00,568 --> 00:11:02,402
He got a good heart.
247
00:11:02,403 --> 00:11:06,387
- We got to stick with him.
- I need you out of here! Go! Go!
248
00:11:06,388 --> 00:11:07,894
Mama, don't kick me out!
249
00:11:07,895 --> 00:11:08,555
[Crashing]
250
00:11:08,556 --> 00:11:09,682
I love you!
251
00:11:09,683 --> 00:11:10,517
yeah
252
00:11:10,518 --> 00:11:13,076
yo, I love my city
especially nighttime
253
00:11:13,077 --> 00:11:18,858
[Farting]
my fifty cock cocked to the side
254
00:11:18,870 --> 00:11:20,110
I mean business
255
00:11:20,111 --> 00:11:24,281
everybody come and get it
there's enough to go around
256
00:11:24,282 --> 00:11:27,033
get, get
go and get your mind right
257
00:11:27,034 --> 00:11:30,453
-
yeah, you can go right
- [Grunts]
258
00:11:30,454 --> 00:11:34,541
[Sniffs] Hoo!
259
00:11:34,542 --> 00:11:37,077
[Exhales sharply]
[Groans]
260
00:11:37,078 --> 00:11:40,163
- What the hell?!
- Vic, this is the best
261
00:11:40,164 --> 00:11:43,131
sleep I had in weeks. I love this car.
262
00:11:43,132 --> 00:11:45,168
- Hell no, hell no!
- What's wrong?
263
00:11:45,169 --> 00:11:47,709
- What's up, huh?
- What's up is you got to get out, bro.
264
00:11:48,400 --> 00:11:49,727
Come on, man. You got to get out, man.
265
00:11:49,728 --> 00:11:50,452
Where we going?
266
00:11:50,453 --> 00:11:52,075
We ain't going nowhere, man.
267
00:11:52,076 --> 00:11:53,169
I need you out of here, man.
268
00:11:53,170 --> 00:11:56,563
- I'm still watching the car.
- I got a hot date tonight.
269
00:11:57,098 --> 00:11:59,974
Look, I got a hot date. I don't need
you to watch the car tonight, okay?
270
00:11:59,975 --> 00:12:00,659
That's nice.
271
00:12:00,660 --> 00:12:02,000
- Where you going?
- The Yard House.
272
00:12:02,001 --> 00:12:04,053
What difference does it
make to you anyway, man?
273
00:12:04,054 --> 00:12:06,439
I ride along, watch the
car while you're eating.
274
00:12:06,440 --> 00:12:07,429
I don't need you to do that.
275
00:12:07,430 --> 00:12:10,452
But we had a deal, Vic... 10 days
I sleep in the car, 10 days!
276
00:12:10,453 --> 00:12:13,159
Yes, when I'm not using the car.
277
00:12:13,160 --> 00:12:15,002
I'm using the car tonight.
278
00:12:15,003 --> 00:12:16,955
And you got it smelling like ass!
279
00:12:16,956 --> 00:12:18,858
That's breach of contract.
280
00:12:19,438 --> 00:12:22,543
You need to find somewhere where
you can wash your ass real soon.
281
00:12:22,544 --> 00:12:24,047
Vic!
282
00:12:24,048 --> 00:12:26,600
Wash your ass, Lloyd.
[Engine turns over]
283
00:12:26,601 --> 00:12:30,692
- Goodbye, mother [Bleep]
- Damn, Vic!
284
00:12:31,564 --> 00:12:32,899
[Doorbell rings]
All right.
285
00:12:32,900 --> 00:12:35,507
I'll just stand back
here when she comes out.
286
00:12:37,738 --> 00:12:39,322
Come here with your strong ass!
287
00:12:39,323 --> 00:12:41,825
Stop, Jesus. Stop! Stop playing.
288
00:12:41,826 --> 00:12:44,361
You play too much.
Don't feel like playing.
289
00:12:44,362 --> 00:12:45,709
I'm being attacked!
290
00:12:45,710 --> 00:12:47,964
I'm being attacked!
Y'all go in the house, go.
291
00:12:47,965 --> 00:12:49,416
Come on. Y'all get in the house.
292
00:12:49,417 --> 00:12:51,134
I need to talk to Jesus. Come on.
293
00:12:51,135 --> 00:12:53,336
Don't kick my son no more.
294
00:12:53,337 --> 00:12:54,971
- I was just playing.
- I know you are.
295
00:12:54,972 --> 00:12:58,709
But I don't know why you brought
Tray up here, always lurking around.
296
00:12:58,710 --> 00:13:00,942
Double agent self, always
297
00:13:00,943 --> 00:13:03,263
standing around listening to people.
298
00:13:03,264 --> 00:13:07,684
Ain't no business around here.
Jesus, I'm sorry about what
299
00:13:07,685 --> 00:13:11,721
happened, but y'all shouldn't have
intervened in our personal business.
300
00:13:11,722 --> 00:13:14,198
Link, this me and you, girl, right?
301
00:13:14,199 --> 00:13:14,996
Right.
302
00:13:14,997 --> 00:13:17,249
Now, you know we go way back.
303
00:13:17,250 --> 00:13:20,153
Now come on, girl. I know how
important this bread is to you.
304
00:13:20,154 --> 00:13:21,052
I do.
305
00:13:21,053 --> 00:13:24,679
But seeing they daddy go to jail
ain't gonna do them kids no good, girl.
306
00:13:24,680 --> 00:13:26,994
Now I know Boonie be cutting up,
307
00:13:26,995 --> 00:13:30,178
like, all the time, and pops know, too.
308
00:13:30,179 --> 00:13:32,873
But right now what we want to
know is, what can the boy do to
309
00:13:32,874 --> 00:13:35,650
- get it right with you?
- He can give me my money tomorrow.
310
00:13:35,651 --> 00:13:38,103
That's what the boy can do.
311
00:13:38,104 --> 00:13:40,188
He might not have the money tomorrow.
312
00:13:40,189 --> 00:13:42,589
But you know we got this
community garden cracking, right?
313
00:13:42,590 --> 00:13:43,441
I heard.
314
00:13:43,442 --> 00:13:45,237
No, I'm serious. It's
cracking right now.
315
00:13:45,238 --> 00:13:47,008
- It's really popping.
- I heard about it.
316
00:13:47,009 --> 00:13:49,450
- It's so dope...
- Trayvon, ain't nobody talking to you.
317
00:13:49,451 --> 00:13:51,797
Man, that's so rude, man.
318
00:13:51,909 --> 00:13:53,501
God.
319
00:13:53,502 --> 00:13:56,621
Anyway, I swear to pops,
the boy coming down
320
00:13:56,622 --> 00:14:00,625
there every day, putting in his
work just like he's supposed to.
321
00:14:00,626 --> 00:14:03,295
But, you know, teamwork make dream work.
322
00:14:03,296 --> 00:14:06,047
Give us a little time and the
boy gonna have the bread for you.
323
00:14:06,048 --> 00:14:07,682
And in the meantime, what do
324
00:14:07,683 --> 00:14:09,187
- I get?
- Shit.
325
00:14:09,188 --> 00:14:11,398
What you want?
326
00:14:11,399 --> 00:14:13,589
This don't have nothing
to do with you, Trayvon!
327
00:14:13,590 --> 00:14:15,565
I don't even know why you up here!
328
00:14:15,566 --> 00:14:17,142
We looking at you, Tray.
329
00:14:17,143 --> 00:14:19,694
- Car's this way.
- Go somewhere.
330
00:14:19,695 --> 00:14:21,735
Jesus don't need no assistant.
331
00:14:21,736 --> 00:14:23,966
Well, anyway, what do you...
what do you want?
332
00:14:23,967 --> 00:14:29,571
I want another chance with Boonie.
I'm never gonna find a man that
333
00:14:29,572 --> 00:14:33,742
really wants to raise these
kids like a real father.
334
00:14:33,743 --> 00:14:36,168
- I'm throwing in the towel.
- Shalinka...
335
00:14:36,169 --> 00:14:38,663
- I just want Boonie back.
- Slow down,
336
00:14:38,664 --> 00:14:40,131
Shalinka. Knock that off.
337
00:14:40,132 --> 00:14:42,000
Jesus, he's the best I'm gonna do.
338
00:14:42,001 --> 00:14:43,501
You don't know that.
339
00:14:43,502 --> 00:14:45,916
Who told you that? Girl,
you are a beautiful,
340
00:14:45,917 --> 00:14:51,343
intelligent, attractive, strong
as an Olympic wrestler girl.
341
00:14:51,344 --> 00:14:52,048
Agree.
342
00:14:52,049 --> 00:14:54,646
But you got a lot going for
yourself so much, girl.
343
00:14:54,647 --> 00:14:58,233
Look at you. Love is out
there for you, girl.
344
00:14:58,234 --> 00:15:01,679
You better not front on love, girl.
345
00:15:03,489 --> 00:15:05,156
Right there, that's it.
346
00:15:05,157 --> 00:15:08,576
Yeah, that's it. Okay.
347
00:15:08,577 --> 00:15:10,695
All right. Yeah, that's it.
348
00:15:10,696 --> 00:15:12,697
- Here you go.
- Hobo power. Oh, yeah.
349
00:15:12,698 --> 00:15:16,358
Hobo power.
[Lock clicks]
350
00:15:19,372 --> 00:15:21,308
[Farts]
351
00:15:21,309 --> 00:15:22,424
Just talk to her.
352
00:15:22,425 --> 00:15:24,209
Take her to lunch or something, fool.
353
00:15:24,210 --> 00:15:27,095
Apologize a little bit, man.
354
00:15:27,096 --> 00:15:29,714
Hell, no. Absolutely not.
355
00:15:29,715 --> 00:15:30,480
No.
356
00:15:30,481 --> 00:15:32,348
Brah, think about what
you're doing, Boon.
357
00:15:32,349 --> 00:15:33,551
I mean, what are you saying?
358
00:15:33,552 --> 00:15:35,520
God wants us to be together?
359
00:15:35,521 --> 00:15:36,270
What?
360
00:15:36,271 --> 00:15:38,807
- No, that ain't what I'm saying.
- Look, what are you saying?
361
00:15:38,808 --> 00:15:44,062
What I'm saying is, pops don't
want your black ass in jail, fool.
362
00:15:44,063 --> 00:15:47,413
No. No. No.
363
00:15:47,413 --> 00:15:49,234
[Sniffs]
364
00:15:49,235 --> 00:15:52,320
- Do you smell that?
- Smell what, baby?
365
00:15:52,321 --> 00:15:54,706
- Smells like ass.
- Ass?
366
00:15:54,707 --> 00:15:57,032
[Chuckles] It's probably
coming from outside.
367
00:15:57,033 --> 00:15:58,376
Ain't me.
368
00:15:58,377 --> 00:16:01,546
- I'm wearing Hai Karate.
- I noticed.
369
00:16:01,547 --> 00:16:06,251
[Chuckles]
[Brakes squealing]
370
00:16:06,252 --> 00:16:10,505
[Engine shuts off]
Sorry, baby, I'm not gonna be
371
00:16:10,506 --> 00:16:12,307
able to hang out. I got
to get up early in the
372
00:16:12,308 --> 00:16:13,842
- morning, you know?
- Oh, okay.
373
00:16:13,843 --> 00:16:17,228
So I can make you one of
my world-famous omelettes.
374
00:16:17,229 --> 00:16:19,597
That is, if you decide to
hang out for a little while.
375
00:16:19,598 --> 00:16:24,602
- [Both chuckle]
- I'm sorry.
376
00:16:24,603 --> 00:16:27,655
It's just, the smell. I
don't know if it's you, but
377
00:16:27,656 --> 00:16:30,803
- something really stinks.
- Maybe it's your upper lip, bitch.
378
00:16:30,804 --> 00:16:32,610
Aah!
379
00:16:32,611 --> 00:16:34,779
- Aah! Aah! Damn!
- Oh, shit!
380
00:16:34,780 --> 00:16:37,449
What the [Bleep] is that you
sprayed in my face, bitch?!
381
00:16:37,450 --> 00:16:40,085
Aah! Damn!
382
00:16:40,086 --> 00:16:41,511
What kind of women you hang out with?
383
00:16:41,512 --> 00:16:44,372
- Why you do that to me?!
- Oh, look. [Chuckles]
384
00:16:44,373 --> 00:16:46,458
She left her purse. Look at that.
385
00:16:46,459 --> 00:16:48,676
- Ah, shit!
- Here, that's your woman.
386
00:16:48,677 --> 00:16:50,428
Take the purse.
387
00:16:50,429 --> 00:16:52,986
- Little young punk.
- I got your wallet, bitch!
388
00:16:52,987 --> 00:16:54,375
And you ain't getting no
389
00:16:54,376 --> 00:16:57,170
[bleep] Omelette! Shit!
390
00:16:58,604 --> 00:17:00,438
Come on, y'all. Let's pray.
391
00:17:00,439 --> 00:17:02,307
That's the only way we
gonna get through this.
392
00:17:02,308 --> 00:17:06,926
Let's bow our heads.
Dear heavenly father, we ask
393
00:17:06,927 --> 00:17:09,447
that you deliver our friend,
Boonie, from this confusing
394
00:17:09,448 --> 00:17:11,649
conundrum that he got his self into.
395
00:17:11,650 --> 00:17:14,135
We know without you nothing is
possible and through you all
396
00:17:14,136 --> 00:17:17,596
things are possible. In my magnificent
and holy name, we pray, Lord.
397
00:17:17,597 --> 00:17:18,823
Amen.
398
00:17:18,824 --> 00:17:21,459
- Mom?
- Well?
399
00:17:21,460 --> 00:17:23,735
- Hey.
- Hey, ain't nothing funny.
400
00:17:23,736 --> 00:17:25,840
They arresting my son
for being a deadbeat.
401
00:17:25,841 --> 00:17:27,821
Don't expect me to come see your
402
00:17:27,822 --> 00:17:30,436
ass in jail, either. You hear me?
403
00:17:30,490 --> 00:17:31,697
Shit.
404
00:17:31,698 --> 00:17:34,568
[Organ music plays]
405
00:17:41,384 --> 00:17:44,470
I guess this is it.
You're happy, ain't you?
406
00:17:44,471 --> 00:17:46,388
It ain't too late, Boon man.
407
00:17:46,389 --> 00:17:50,426
You still got action, brah.
Just apologize to the girl, man.
408
00:17:50,427 --> 00:17:53,345
Be nice to her. Chunky meat
got a new location, man.
409
00:17:53,346 --> 00:17:54,730
She want to go.
410
00:17:54,731 --> 00:17:56,849
- Take her to lunch.
- Man, I ain't going near her.
411
00:17:56,850 --> 00:17:59,485
Is that Daboonde Johnson?
412
00:17:59,486 --> 00:18:01,198
Yes.
413
00:18:01,620 --> 00:18:04,189
Daboonde, get up.
414
00:18:04,190 --> 00:18:06,608
- Get up.
- Hey, man.
415
00:18:06,609 --> 00:18:09,828
Look, I know why you're here.
I don't have any money.
416
00:18:09,829 --> 00:18:11,663
So you guys do what you got to do.
417
00:18:11,664 --> 00:18:13,615
Daboonde, I'm placing you under arrest.
418
00:18:13,616 --> 00:18:16,785
Cuff him. Come on.
419
00:18:16,786 --> 00:18:18,754
Them cuffs is kind of tight, man.
420
00:18:18,755 --> 00:18:21,123
- You know my boy bruise easy.
- Well, Jesus?
421
00:18:21,124 --> 00:18:23,125
I'm sorry, Shalinka.
422
00:18:23,126 --> 00:18:26,345
Hey, Shalinka, I want you
to know we haven't got a
423
00:18:26,346 --> 00:18:29,348
shot at being together.
I mean, I know I'm not perfect,
424
00:18:29,349 --> 00:18:31,717
but I respect bitches.
You see what I'm saying?
425
00:18:31,718 --> 00:18:33,719
So I need a bitch that respect me.
426
00:18:33,720 --> 00:18:39,358
So if it comes down to me being
with you versus going to jail,
427
00:18:39,359 --> 00:18:42,394
- shit, I choose jail.
- Well, y'all need to take him to jail.
428
00:18:42,395 --> 00:18:44,066
Hey, Shalinka, think about it.
429
00:18:44,067 --> 00:18:45,397
Come on, girl.
430
00:18:45,398 --> 00:18:48,650
- Why they arresting daddy?
- Because daddy owes us a lot of money.
431
00:18:48,651 --> 00:18:51,320
So? He already paid.
432
00:18:51,321 --> 00:18:53,322
- Daddy gave you this?
- I knew it.
433
00:18:53,323 --> 00:18:54,656
- Yeah.
- I knew it!
434
00:18:54,657 --> 00:18:57,811
I told you. I told you all I'd
take care of my kids, man.
435
00:18:57,812 --> 00:18:59,014
How many times did I ask
436
00:18:59,015 --> 00:19:02,360
y'all if daddy gave you money?
Why didn't you tell mommy earlier?
437
00:19:02,361 --> 00:19:04,536
Because you was gonna
spend it on hair weaves!
438
00:19:04,537 --> 00:19:05,501
That's right.
439
00:19:05,502 --> 00:19:07,503
You spend it on... well, y'all
can un-handcuff me, man.
440
00:19:07,504 --> 00:19:09,338
I'm not no criminal, man.
441
00:19:09,339 --> 00:19:11,423
Yeah, that's right. Look at this cop.
442
00:19:11,424 --> 00:19:14,176
Look like Fish's daddy at a
jazz concert or something.
443
00:19:14,177 --> 00:19:16,178
- What's happening?
- Shalinka, we good?
444
00:19:16,179 --> 00:19:19,422
We good, Detective Diggs.
I got your number if I need you next time.
445
00:19:20,707 --> 00:19:22,568
Tight-ass suit.
446
00:19:22,569 --> 00:19:26,482
Look, Boonie, you know I don't
really want to get back with you.
447
00:19:26,483 --> 00:19:28,357
I just... I need help.
448
00:19:28,358 --> 00:19:30,776
I need a partner raising these kids.
449
00:19:30,777 --> 00:19:33,412
- All I'm asking for is your help.
- Then let's try to
450
00:19:33,413 --> 00:19:35,540
come to some type of
understanding, 'cause, see, this
451
00:19:35,541 --> 00:19:38,617
what go wrong... you always let
me call you when I'm drunk, and
452
00:19:38,618 --> 00:19:41,503
you always let me do it to
you without protection.
453
00:19:41,504 --> 00:19:42,921
See how that happens?
454
00:19:42,922 --> 00:19:44,756
Look at that. What I always say?
455
00:19:44,757 --> 00:19:46,959
Believe, huh? You see
how that worked out?
456
00:19:46,960 --> 00:19:48,677
Give me some! Yeah!
457
00:19:48,678 --> 00:19:51,872
Believe in what? You
didn't do anything?
458
00:19:51,873 --> 00:19:52,848
I mean, but...
459
00:19:52,849 --> 00:19:54,766
the kids had the bread the whole time.
460
00:19:54,767 --> 00:19:56,185
I mean, that was a miracle right there.
461
00:19:56,186 --> 00:19:58,437
- How you think that happened?
- That wasn't no miracle.
462
00:19:58,438 --> 00:20:00,355
That was my money.
463
00:20:00,356 --> 00:20:01,728
What's this fool talking about?
464
00:20:01,729 --> 00:20:04,409
'Cause Jesus don't know
what he talking about.
465
00:20:04,558 --> 00:20:10,337
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466
00:20:10,387 --> 00:20:14,937
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