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{418}{480}Hello, emergency.|What service did you require, please?
{485}{544}Hello, quick, anybody,|just get help!
{549}{645}-Where are you calling from, sir?|-Kaihoro, phone box.
{650}{716}There was this roaring noise|and a big white light in the sky...
{721}{836}and then... these...|invaders started killing us!
{841}{918}Hold on sir, I'll connect you|with the Internal Affairs Dpt.
{923}{991}-No time, they're after me...|-Hello?
{996}{1032}Aaaargh!
{1037}{1109}Is there anybody there?
{1419}{1460}What do you think, Minister?
{1465}{1525}Call a full-scale invasion alert, sir.
{1530}{1676}I'll phone the forces,|fighters frigates, footsloggers...
{1845}{1909}Perhaps that could all be|a bit showy.
{1914}{2047}I think this is a job for real men.
{2741}{2792}Just stop right there!
{2797}{2856}Stop!
{2916}{2976}I think you'd better kill him, Barry.
{2981}{3032}Jeez, he could be|Ministry or Works...
{3037}{3119}No, he's moving too fast.
{3503}{3604}Stop!|This is definitely your last chance!
{4146}{4239}That's the story!
{4273}{4358}I always thought you were|left-handed.
{4408}{4515}No, the head shot's|the only true stopper.
{5463}{5508}Ugh...
{5513}{5608}Aw Jeez!
{5620}{5695}I hope I'm not the poor bastard|that's got to clean that up.
{5700}{5762}Jesus!
{6321}{6384}Stick all the bits of brain|in a plastic bag, Barry.
{6389}{6429}We'll need them for analysis.
{6434}{6546}No bloody way mate.|Come down here and do that yourself.
{6620}{6699}You're the yung-ho scientist.
{6704}{6764}All right.|I'll be down straight after lunch.
{6769}{6823}But at least take a blood sample.
{6828}{6893}No need.|I'll just wring my strides out.
{6898}{7008}Well, at least we got|one live specimen.
{7013}{7083}Yeah.
{7323}{7370}Seen anyone else about,|Barry?
{7375}{7424}No, the place is completely|deserted.
{7429}{7554}They're probably all dead,|that's at least 75 people.
{7556}{7643}Jeez, I just hope we're in time|to save the world.
{7648}{7716}Well, I just hope you got it right|this time.
{7721}{7815}No doubt about it Barry.|I've been watching the skies.
{7820}{7868}And do you know|what the skies did?
{7873}{7999}-They pointed...|-They pointed at this place.
{8191}{8246}Why can't aliens be friendly?
{8251}{8311}There's no glowing fingers|on these bastards.
{8316}{8403}We've got a bunch of extra-terrestrial|psychopaths on our hands.
{8408}{8518}Like a... visit from a planet|full of Charlie Mansons.
{8523}{8567}They've wiped out|a small town for starters.
{8572}{8684}It's my guess they'll go on|to something bigger next time.
{8689}{8758}-Christchurch, Wellington...|-Auckland?
{8763}{8845}Yeah, well that wouldn't be so bad.
{9168}{9227}Well you'd better contact|the others, Derek.
{9232}{9286}They should be in range now.
{9291}{9323}Tell them to keep an eye out...
{9328}{9396}for someone who could be|heading this way.
{9401}{9440}-Who?|-A collector.
{9445}{9473}There's some appeal on.
{9478}{9529}There's envelopes stuck|on all the doors...
{9534}{9609}and today's collection day.
{9888}{9964}Hey! There's something|that's just occurred to me too, mate.
{9969}{9991}What's that?
{9996}{10055}That joker you topped a while back.
{10060}{10093}He might have friends.
{10098}{10155}I'd keep my eyes skinned|if I were you.
{10160}{10249}You needn't worry.|I'm not stupid, thanks...
{12215}{12339}Come in Frank.|Ozzy, are you there?
{12721}{12801}Boys, are you there?
{12895}{12982}Turn it down, Ozzy!
{13020}{13107}That's elevator music|for headbangers.
{13116}{13176}Frank! Ozzy!|Are you there?
{13181}{13260}Yeah, we're here mate, but could|you use the proper call-sign?
{13265}{13346}-There could be people listening.|-There's nobody for miles, Frank.
{13351}{13421}Besides, I don't think|whispering's going to help.
{13426}{13472}He's got a point there, Frank.
{13477}{13578}What do you mean, nobody for miles?|I thought you were in Kaihoro
{13583}{13660}I am in Kaihoro|and I was right all long.
{13665}{13744}-They've done the entire town.|-Who's done the town?
{13749}{13805}The extra-terrestrial low-lifers.
{13810}{13898}And guess what!|We've caught one of the bastards!
{13903}{13952}Me and Barry got him|loping over the hills...
{13957}{14003}just like he owned the bloody place.
{14008}{14064}-Huh?|-Now do you believe me?
{14069}{14123}Jeez, look Derek,|just keep him there.
{14128}{14179}-You got him secured?|-Bloody oath!
{14184}{14254}Right, now don't touch him.|We'll be there in 45 minutes.
{14259}{14363}Whatever you do, don't harm him.|No physical violence!
{14368}{14432}Another thing, Derek,|keep a careful look-out.
{14437}{14505}-There could be more about.|-There was! Down on the beach!
{14510}{14572}Hell, well look.|Don't go near him.
{14577}{14642}-It's a little late for that, Frank.|-What?
{14647}{14678}It wasn't me.
{14683}{14768}Barry shot his head off.|He had the magnum.
{14773}{14825}I knew it was a mistake|to issue weapons.
{14830}{14902}We're a government department,|not a para-military unit.
{14907}{14972}The Astro-Investigation|and Defence Service.
{14977}{15015}Wish they change that name!
{15020}{15103}Due to the potentially|dangerous hazards involved...
{15108}{15215}All right, at least you managed|to convince the minister.
{15267}{15329}Aren't you interested|in this joker we caught then?
{15334}{15395}-Course we are, Derek.|-Right.
{15400}{15477}Stay where you are and I'll give you|an eye-witness description...
{15482}{15586}of this inter-galactic wanker.
{15717}{15846}Well, I'd describe him as|sort of human-shaped.
{15851}{15928}He's got jeans|and a blue shirt on.
{15933}{15992}Christ, he's nabbed|a bloody farmer!
{15997}{16065}Yeah, but there's|something strange about him.
{16070}{16135}Like he's got a screw loose|or something.
{16140}{16199}It's a bloody farmer!
{16204}{16275}Yeah, Derek strikes again!
{16280}{16369}Is this another false alarm like the|Manners Street Invasion Alert?
{16374}{16465}How do you explain the disappearance|of an entire township then, Frank?
{16470}{16549}The Kiwi Jonestown, of course,|that's it.
{16554}{16654}Drinking beer laced with cyanide|from little polystyrene cups.
{16659}{16728}Yeah, yeah,|OK. Derek, just do me one favour.
{16733}{16755}What?
{16760}{16815}Try not to make him extinct|before we get there.
{16820}{16857}Out!
{16862}{16970}Christ, what a dork!|How the hell did he get in this team?
{17601}{17743}Well, this has buggered your plans|for conquering the universe, eh?
{17769}{17876}My friend the astro-bastard.|Time for talkies.
{17881}{17932}By the time my colleagues|get here...
{17937}{18049}I want to have you babbling|in some extra-terrestrial language.
{18054}{18113}Now in case you don't want|to do what you're told...
{18118}{18218}I could always encourage you|by hammering this cold steel...
{18223}{18265}into your fibula.
{18270}{18331}It'll sure poke a nasty hole|in your marrow, mate.
{18336}{18424}We'll get the old ball rolling, eh?
{18528}{18656}Now, what are you dirty hooers|doing on my planet?
{19397}{19477}Oh, bugger it!
{19734}{19872}Well, looks as if it's time|for the old count of ten.
{19878}{19941}One...
{19945}{20010}Two...
{20010}{20074}Three...
{20074}{20108}Six...
{20113}{20173}Seven, eight...
{20178}{20245}Nine...
{20255}{20319}Ten.
{20861}{20932}Derek!
{21572}{21651}Derek!
{22747}{22798}Derek!
{22803}{22837}Come in, Derek!
{22842}{22886}What?
{22891}{22964}Aw jeez!
{23129}{23211}Oh, I should have expected that.
{23216}{23299}-Derek!|-All right!
{23316}{23421}Quickly Derek!
{23510}{23551}Come on!
{23556}{23622}Jeez Barry, you've got awful timing.|What?
{23627}{23695}Just listen to me.|You've got to get out of there fast!
{23700}{23760}Five of those blue-shirted freaks|are coming up.
{23765}{23843}They heard their mate screaming.
{24159}{24211}Get out of there fast Derek.
{24216}{24322}I can't do that.|I'm a Derek.
{24327}{24367}Dereks don't run.
{24372}{24455}Well, get up a tree or something.
{24496}{24603}Yeah, look don't worry.|I've taken precautions.
{24632}{24700}Oh, shit!
{25386}{25451}Shit!
{28056}{28126}Bastards!
{32614}{32692}Eat lead sucker!
{35133}{35242}Mammy!
{37331}{37388}I think this is going a little bit|over the top, Ozzy.
{37393}{37506}Nah, this'll do the trick.|Nobody'll be coming up this road.
{37595}{37650}But the nearest nuclear|reactor's in America.
{37655}{37742}But it could have been an explosion on|one of those Springbok warships.
{37747}{37801}Frank!|Ozzy!
{37806}{37890}Frank! Ozzy!|Come in!
{37895}{37926}Yeah, what is it Barry?
{37931}{37998}Jeez you guys|we're in trouble this time.
{38003}{38052}It's really hit the fan.
{38057}{38132}Derek's wiped out|five of these alien jokers.
{38137}{38197}The place is like a bloody abattoir.
{38202}{38244}Where's Derek now?
{38249}{38335}Well, he's...|he's turned his toes up, guys.
{38340}{38416}Took a dive off the bloody cliff.
{38421}{38499}He's popped his rivets.
{38507}{38568}Poor Derek!
{38573}{38630}Who's going to look after|his aviary now?
{38635}{38753}Yeah, birds were the only thing|he could relate to.
{38808}{38877}Right, we'll be there|in about fifteen minutes.
{38882}{38967}No, I think it'll be best|if you stay where you are.
{38972}{39046}Just get the car off the road|until I call you back.
{39051}{39127}I'm going to head off in the direction|that alien joker was going...
{39132}{39165}when me and Derek caught him.
{39170}{39210}He must have been going|somewhere.
{39215}{39267}They've probably got a base|up there or something.
{39272}{39350}They don't need a base.|They beam down from their spaceship.
{39355}{39442}Well maybe they haven't seen|Star Trek, Ozzy.
{43062}{43126}Come on!
{43152}{43212}Shit!
{44351}{44422}Bye, bye!
{46019}{46121}That's my overtime up to date.|Here, do you want to do yours?
{46126}{46185}Hey, Frank!
{46190}{46240}Yeah, what is it Barry?
{46245}{46313}Where exactly are you two?
{46318}{46368}About five miles from Kaihoro.
{46373}{46414}Yeah well just stay put.
{46419}{46511}I think I might have spotted something|and I'm moving in closer.
{46618}{46681}Finished, Oz?
{47709}{47772}Oh, shit!
{48162}{48261}Uh, your phone...|Could I use your phone?
{48740}{48828}I was just... I was...
{49260}{49309}We've got trouble.
{49314}{49352}Good one!
{49357}{49422}Right, we're on our way.
{51201}{51276}I suppose you're wondering|why you're soaking...
{51281}{51386}in Reg's eleven|secret herbs and spices.
{51434}{51535}Tomorrow we're having you|for lunch.
{51670}{51742}You are the exotic|new taste sensation.
{51747}{51807}Human flesh is it!
{51812}{51884}You're going to be the first bit of meat|that we've had a chance...
{51889}{51944}to get our teeth into|since we arrived.
{51949}{52000}So we're going to treat ourselves|to a feast...
{52005}{52071}with you as the main course.
{52076}{52177}It's quite an honour really.
{52227}{52325}We'd better leave|so he can get some sleep.
{52330}{52455}I'll have the head, Reg.|I want to suck his brains out.
{56333}{56393}We ought to go back to|get reinforcements.
{56398}{56459}-That'll take a day.|-And the rest!
{56464}{56512}Take two days to do|the bloody paperwork.
{56517}{56600}Yeah, and by then that collector|bloke could be dead.
{56605}{56678}If he's not really.
{56749}{56814}Look, we'll go in....
{56819}{56898}after midnight.
{58039}{58112}Well, guess I'll have|to issue a gun to Ozzy.
{58117}{58217}Yeah, but don't forget about|his personality disorder.
{58521}{58613}Open season on E.T.s, Frank?
{58635}{58660}Remember Ozzy...
{58665}{58733}Get in quietly, get out quietly.
{58738}{58819}I certainly hope that is the case.
{59444}{59514}Sorry, Oz.|We won't be needing that.
{59519}{59627}Bloody Barry!|Bastard!
{59632}{59730}What are we going to do|if we're spotted, Frank?
{59851}{59955}Well, I guess we shoot the bastards.
{59960}{60034}My turn to the magnum.
{60136}{60207}I just wish we didn't have|to wear all this crap.
{60212}{60262}Yeah but you know what|the rules are.
{60267}{60346}When we work undercover|we have to remain faceless.
{60351}{60449}Oh I get it, just in case we kill|a lot of innocent people.
{60454}{60524}Don't you forget, we're only|authorised to use violence...
{60529}{60572}when there's a threat|to the planet Earth.
{60577}{60676}-And the moon!|-And the moon!
{60745}{60846}There you go, Oz.|Stick this stuff on.
{61014}{61051}We ought to have a look around.
{61056}{61122}If these are aliens, they might have|parked their spaceship.
{61127}{61212}They might have come|in a telephone box.
{61227}{61303}Well let's just get that guy out|and will contact base...
{61308}{61365}and give them|the code-words for invasion.
{61370}{61410}"The bastards have landed."
{61415}{61493}"The bastards have landed."
{61814}{61952}I'll be there in a moment, Robert.
{62171}{62259}Welcome my friends.|The job is almost done.
{62264}{62309}We take off for home tomorrow.
{62314}{62398}I'm sure you'll be pleased|to be leaving this shitty planet.
{62403}{62496}In the meantime I must impress|upon you the importance...
{62501}{62546}of remaining in human form...
{62551}{62646}no matter how awkward, uncomfortable|and ugly it makes you feel.
{62651}{62796}We are so close to success|that we must take no chances.
{62924}{62977}Right.|Looks pretty quiet.
{62982}{63054}-Probably all gone to bed.|-Jeez, I hope not.
{63059}{63105}Right, synchronise watches.
{63110}{63180}Twelve oh one.
{63181}{63248}Check.
{63287}{63312}Check.
{63317}{63417}Let's go.|We're on triple time.
{63775}{63862}The sad news is that|we will be heading for Nalic Nod...
{63867}{63972}with six of our co-workers|in a state of permanent death.
{63977}{64084}They died today,|murdered by some real arse-holes.
{64089}{64213}Robert escaped their clutches|and reported back to me.
{64376}{64430}My God!
{64435}{64527}What the...?|My God... the blood!
{64739}{64771}Shit!
{64776}{64860}Somebody could get killed in here.
{65002}{65062}Vacuum the floors,|clean the windows and...
{65067}{65154}all the boxes must be loaded into|the freezer early in the morning.
{65159}{65226}We've been wasting our time|unless we can present samples...
{65231}{65289}to the Nalic Nod Fast Food Authority.
{65294}{65373}Isn't it amazing how you can fit|a whole town of humans...
{65378}{65443}into a few card of board boxes,|if you slice off the fat?
{65448}{65541}It's the value of keeping your knife|sharp and your mind clean.
{65546}{65631}Jesus guys, Derek was right!
{65636}{65732}This is what's left|of the people from Kaihoro.
{65792}{65866}They're in those boxes!
{65873}{65939}Get him, Barry!
{66120}{66185}For God's sake guys,|keep it quiet!
{66190}{66261}Shut him up, Oz.
{66358}{66423}I've just cleaned that bit.
{66428}{66483}Uh, that's gross!
{66488}{66542}Gee!|They come to bits easy!
{66547}{66610}Get rid of it!
{66659}{66751}The old magic's still there.
{66919}{66958}What are you doing Frank?
{66963}{67067}I'm going to go in and find out|what's going on.
{67117}{67190}Here, he was carrying this.
{67195}{67265}You, stay here.
{67306}{67372}...the importance of keeping the|bloody books up to date.
{67377}{67420}The past week has been difficult...
{67425}{67482}and I would like to say|how proud I am of you all.
{67487}{67586}The manner in which you conducted|a very tricky slaughter operation...
{67591}{67646}has been a real credit to you|and indeed...
{67651}{67732}to the whole Crumb's Crunchy|Delights organisation.
{67737}{67865}Your paychecks will reflect|the gratitude of the company.
{67870}{67924}I don't think we'll have|any more trouble.
{67929}{67966}However...
{67971}{68093}we will be handing|these around later.
{68269}{68300}I am certain that...
{68305}{68409}when the homo sapiens taste takes|the galaxy by storm as it will..
{68414}{68478}Crumb's Crunchy Delights|will be back at the top.
{68483}{68570}McYaballow's Fried Moonrat|won't know what hit them.
{68575}{68628}All the livestock we need|are right here.
{68633}{68713}Four billion of them!
{68777}{68833}Right, Robert.
{68838}{68923}Once the Fast Food Authority|have checked the samples...
{68928}{68985}and issued|the Mass Slaughter Permits...
{68990}{69051}this grotty little planet|will tremble...
{69056}{69134}under the full might of|the Lord Crumb restaurant chain!
{69139}{69236}Within a year the giant mincer|will descend from the sky...
{69241}{69294}the sun reflecting|from its silver bits...
{69299}{69356}and no army on earth|will be able to stop...
{69361}{69436}the noddy-burger machine!
{70279}{70385}I see the gruel is ready!
{70515}{70611}An exquisite bouquet, Robert.
{70761}{70860}Aren't I lucky, I got a chunky bit!
{70878}{70960}Here you are, boys.
{71470}{71521}We'll bring out a whole line...
{71526}{71609}of homo-sapiens low-calorie|delicacies...
{71614}{71716}juicy raw rump...
{71722}{71811}brains soaked in lemon juice...
{71816}{71917}spinal fluid sauce...
{71932}{71974}assorted organ stew...
{71979}{72036}sapien-burguers...
{72041}{72204}and chewy homo nuggets.
{72709}{72768}Just before we leave tomorrow...
{72773}{72856}we'll have a little party dinner|with fresh local meat.
{72861}{72995}It's my show of appreciation|to you all.
{73103}{73196}Christ, you'll never believe|what I just had to do!
{73201}{73287}Did you have to drink|some chuck?
{73317}{73410}Come on, let's find that guy|and get out of here.
{73427}{73508}Goodnight, boys.
{73526}{73600}Goodnight, Reg.
{73611}{73754}Oh, Robert,|what a lovely little hottie!
{74272}{74334}You OK?
{74485}{74555}Careful!
{74759}{74826}-Thanks.|-Get dressed.
{74831}{74889}Door!
{75612}{75694}Well, at least we got in quietly.
{75723}{75784}Stay here!
{77135}{77200}Up here!
{78976}{78999}Got him!
{79004}{79093}Good one!|Get the bastards!
{79241}{79328}There's more outside!
{79719}{79806}Split up!|Send the boy up here!
{80362}{80422}Come on!
{80578}{80612}How many did you see?
{80617}{80652}About eight or nine.
{80657}{80735}Nah, there's heaps more.
{80900}{80974}That's one less.
{81113}{81176}-Ever been in a gun battle before?|-No.
{81181}{81281}Me neither, but this one's|going to be beaut eh?
{83014}{83077}Go Frank!
{83340}{83415}Cover the back!
{84089}{84159}Gotcha!
{86144}{86203}Come on!
{86554}{86613}Look out!
{91259}{91344}I bet that cleared his sinuses.
{91730}{91810}That's another beer you owe me,|Oz.
{92901}{92966}Let's go that way.
{92971}{93005}You reckon?
{93010}{93075}Too right!
{93750}{93809}Bastard!
{95389}{95470}Bastard!
{95724}{95801}Go, I'll cover you!
{96338}{96424}Where the hell's Barry?
{96890}{96952}Aw, sod it!
{97442}{97481}Oh, shit!
{97486}{97553}Jeez!
{98978}{99045}The gun, Robert!
{99472}{99562}Come on Barry,|stop farting around!
{99846}{99893}Right, let's go out of here.
{99898}{99975}What the hell is that?
{100039}{100142}-Well it sounds to me like...|-Oh shut up, codpiece face!
{100638}{100726}You three, kill them!
{100731}{100839}The rest of you get these bodies|on board the ship.
{102220}{102332}-Jeez, they're real dickheads!|-Derek was right all along.
{102750}{102820}Get him, Oz!
{102829}{102892}Get down!
{103094}{103173}Oh, bloody hell!
{103442}{103521}Come on, baby!
{103672}{103706}Keen jogger, mate?
{103711}{103809}Should have bought a Holden,|Frank!
{104672}{104698}What's up, Oz?
{104703}{104777}You go on, I'm going to go back|and stop those bastards.
{104782}{104853}-We're supposed to be going for help.|-You go.
{104858}{104962}Besides, you're not going|to be back in time to stop them.
{104989}{105051}Come on!
{107162}{107236}Good one!
{107287}{107366}That was my car!
{107622}{107742}Just go to the nearest phone|and call head office.
{107792}{107908}-Hi, my name's Giles Copeland.|-Yeah, I'm Barry, let's go.
{108229}{108317}That's the end of those|weekend cowboys!
{108322}{108419}Let's go home.
{108709}{108812}Dum dum dum...
{109463}{109586}Jesus Oz, what are you doing?|That's an historical homestead!
{109609}{109633}Yeah, I know it.
{109638}{109715}I've got another one here, too.
{110176}{110225}Wankers!
{110230}{110287}For God's sake, Oz,|put that thing down.
{110292}{110365}Let's get in there|and hit the leader.
{110370}{110448}Hey, wait for me!
{114167}{114269}Holy shit!
{114647}{114717}OK then!
{114727}{114797}Quit playing with them.
{115301}{115329}Good one!
{115334}{115382}-Yaaah!|-Derek!
{115387}{115422}-Bastards!|-Jesus!
{115427}{115496}-He's gone apeshit!|-Bastard!
{115501}{115576}Let's get the hell out of here!
{116155}{116253}-Are you all right?|-Get the launcher!
{116294}{116381}Blast the bastard!
{118445}{118516}No!
{118516}{118564}Ozzy!
{118569}{118645}Frank!
{118884}{118982}Where the hell are you going?|Come here!
{121294}{121359}Holy shit!
{121364}{121437}Derek!
{122011}{122048}Jeez Oz...
{122053}{122110}Here you go mate.
{122115}{122216}-I don't smoke.|-Uh!
{122370}{122442}Bastards!
{123020}{123112}Hello, are you there?
{123190}{123260}Mummy!
{123381}{123407}...very well really.
{123412}{123485}But then these pricks|tried to take us on...
{123490}{123547}but we soon fixed them...
{123552}{123640}Lost all the scummy|third-class labourers...
{123645}{123695}but I've got some great samples...
{123700}{123774}I'll be home|in about twenty minutes.
{123779}{123827}Hold the line!
{123832}{123897}Shit!
{124970}{125072}Suck my spinning steel, shithead!
{126293}{126379}I'm born again!
{126653}{126755}I'm coming to get you bastards!21609
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