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1
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♪ The things that you tell me
The things that you don't ♪
2
00:00:12,554 --> 00:00:14,888
[Grey] When an infection destroys a cell,
3
00:00:14,889 --> 00:00:17,516
the surrounding cells signal each other
to wall it off.
4
00:00:17,517 --> 00:00:21,270
Help. I just had a Nissen fundoplication
and I can't swallow.
5
00:00:21,271 --> 00:00:22,521
What's happening to me?
6
00:00:22,522 --> 00:00:25,566
Are you you, or are you still
a 50-year-old man with achalasia?
7
00:00:25,567 --> 00:00:26,734
It doesn't say.
8
00:00:26,735 --> 00:00:27,776
[sighs] Oh.
9
00:00:27,777 --> 00:00:31,321
[Grey] They isolate the infected cell
to prevent it from spreading
10
00:00:31,322 --> 00:00:33,408
and harming other parts of your body.
11
00:00:34,868 --> 00:00:36,660
[Helm] You think they'll ever
talk to each other again?
12
00:00:36,661 --> 00:00:37,911
[Yasuda] Don't know, don't care.
13
00:00:37,912 --> 00:00:39,998
As long as they finish
their procedure logs.
14
00:00:40,874 --> 00:00:43,834
Besides, I'm too busy
rushing you back to the OR
15
00:00:43,835 --> 00:00:45,961
to loosen the wrap of your stomach.
16
00:00:45,962 --> 00:00:48,465
Correct. You get a fry.
17
00:00:49,382 --> 00:00:53,218
[Grey] The isolation is temporary,
but important.
18
00:00:53,219 --> 00:00:55,345
I prefer the study technique
you used the other night.
19
00:00:55,346 --> 00:00:57,347
I'm not taking my clothes off here.
20
00:00:57,348 --> 00:00:59,893
[Grey] It gives your body time to trigger
your immune system
21
00:01:01,227 --> 00:01:03,480
and stop the infection from spreading.
22
00:01:03,980 --> 00:01:06,398
Did you pick up those yogurt things
that Leo loves this morning?
23
00:01:06,399 --> 00:01:08,567
Sorry. An MVC came in.
24
00:01:08,568 --> 00:01:11,236
Hey, does Pru go through those phases
where she'll only eat two things?
25
00:01:11,237 --> 00:01:13,822
We're at yogurt and graham crackers.
26
00:01:13,823 --> 00:01:17,910
Oh, we are at "I'm going to shove food
under my plate and pretend that I ate it."
27
00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:18,828
[both chuckle]
28
00:01:18,829 --> 00:01:20,996
- Any plans tonight, Bailey?
- I have plans.
29
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I have plans to take a bath,
30
00:01:22,499 --> 00:01:25,042
and not think about interns
for seven hours.
31
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- And then I'm also going to...
- [phones chime]
32
00:01:27,253 --> 00:01:28,962
...the pit.
33
00:01:28,963 --> 00:01:31,340
I'm going to the pit. Multiple traumas?
34
00:01:31,341 --> 00:01:33,509
Yeah, me too. I'll page the interns.
35
00:01:33,510 --> 00:01:35,594
All right, I'll pick up the yogurt.
Good luck.
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[Grey] Until isolation
is no longer needed.
37
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Ready for tonight?
38
00:01:41,267 --> 00:01:43,519
"I'm gonna make you an offer
you can't refuse."
39
00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:45,187
- What is that?
- The Godfather.
40
00:01:45,188 --> 00:01:46,688
- Oh.
- It's movie night.
41
00:01:46,689 --> 00:01:50,109
[groans] We're on call.
We should sleep when we can.
42
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Every time I pick the movie,
you're too tired to watch.
43
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Not true!
44
00:01:53,154 --> 00:01:56,448
I sat through that whole baseball movie.
I should get extra points for that.
45
00:01:56,449 --> 00:01:57,699
That was five weeks ago.
46
00:01:57,700 --> 00:01:59,409
- [laughs] No, it was not.
- Yeah!
47
00:01:59,410 --> 00:02:03,288
It was three Screams, one Jason Bourne
and Pride of the Yankees ago.
48
00:02:03,289 --> 00:02:04,541
Five weeks.
49
00:02:06,501 --> 00:02:08,794
Then I'm late.
50
00:02:08,795 --> 00:02:10,295
For what?
51
00:02:10,296 --> 00:02:11,548
[whispers] My period.
52
00:02:13,341 --> 00:02:14,968
[phones buzz, chime]
53
00:02:16,469 --> 00:02:18,303
- It's the ER.
- Should we ignore it?
54
00:02:18,304 --> 00:02:19,514
It's 911.
55
00:02:20,265 --> 00:02:21,557
So is this.
56
00:02:21,558 --> 00:02:22,559
[sighs]
57
00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:24,227
[sighs]
58
00:02:25,687 --> 00:02:27,229
[Shepherd] I never thought
I'd mean this literally,
59
00:02:27,230 --> 00:02:29,606
but I'm reading about
a bunch of random people's crap.
60
00:02:29,607 --> 00:02:32,276
Are all of these adult children
of people with Alzheimer's?
61
00:02:32,277 --> 00:02:35,487
Well, we need to confirm
certain bacteria in the gut.
62
00:02:35,488 --> 00:02:37,573
Our hypothesis will be even more solid.
63
00:02:37,574 --> 00:02:41,034
I'm going to need hard data if I'm ever
going to approach Catherine again.
64
00:02:41,035 --> 00:02:43,453
How can you eat while we're
analyzing these results?
65
00:02:43,454 --> 00:02:45,664
Mmm, becoming my mother
terrifies me that much.
66
00:02:45,665 --> 00:02:47,292
- [chuckles]
- [phone chimes]
67
00:02:48,585 --> 00:02:50,335
[Grey] Zola. "Can Ellis have ice cream?"
68
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No, she can't have ice cream.
It's so late.
69
00:02:53,131 --> 00:02:54,673
Parenting by text. I'm impressed.
70
00:02:54,674 --> 00:02:56,967
Well, it only works
because Zola's honest and mature.
71
00:02:56,968 --> 00:02:59,304
- That's the part that's impressive.
- [phone chiming]
72
00:03:00,138 --> 00:03:03,765
Nick is supposed to read Ellis a story.
Well, ask Nick.
73
00:03:03,766 --> 00:03:05,976
[Shepherd] Do you think fried rice
is anti-inflammatory?
74
00:03:05,977 --> 00:03:07,227
[phone chimes]
75
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What if it's brown rice?
76
00:03:09,314 --> 00:03:10,857
Nick took Bailey to the hospital.
77
00:03:21,701 --> 00:03:25,537
I worked two nights ago and I'm the only
person with my procedure card filled out.
78
00:03:25,538 --> 00:03:27,331
I should be at home studying or sleeping...
79
00:03:27,332 --> 00:03:29,458
Ask your co-chief resident
for an exemption.
80
00:03:29,459 --> 00:03:31,044
- [paramedic] Coming through.
- Nice try.
81
00:03:32,295 --> 00:03:34,214
Oh, wow. Man.
82
00:03:35,173 --> 00:03:36,173
[Helm] What happened?
83
00:03:36,174 --> 00:03:39,551
Second floor deck collapsed, mostly minor
lacerations and musculoskeletal injuries,
84
00:03:39,552 --> 00:03:41,011
but we're still waiting on a few rigs.
85
00:03:41,012 --> 00:03:42,638
- They're all med...
- Medical students.
86
00:03:42,639 --> 00:03:44,848
They were having a white coat party.
They just got theirs.
87
00:03:44,849 --> 00:03:47,559
- I remember that party. I got super dr...
- [Bailey clears throat]
88
00:03:47,560 --> 00:03:50,062
Dramatic about reaching
another milestone in my career.
89
00:03:50,063 --> 00:03:52,440
Everybody grab a chart.
It's gonna be a long night.
90
00:03:53,524 --> 00:03:55,359
- [medical student] Come on.
- [groans]
91
00:03:55,360 --> 00:03:59,404
Hey, someone get him a CBC,
type and screen, and hemoglobin.
92
00:03:59,405 --> 00:04:00,823
- Stat.
- It's okay. I'm okay.
93
00:04:01,407 --> 00:04:03,575
- Mr. Oliver?
- That's me. Eddie.
94
00:04:03,576 --> 00:04:05,827
- Looks like he dislocated his shoulder...
- [Wilson clears throat]
95
00:04:05,828 --> 00:04:10,123
...so reduce it, get an MRI
and page me with the results.
96
00:04:10,124 --> 00:04:12,292
- So the X-ray showed it's not broken?
- Exactly.
97
00:04:12,293 --> 00:04:14,253
We'll do a local block
and then I'll adduct your arm.
98
00:04:14,254 --> 00:04:15,338
[Adams] Need any help?
99
00:04:16,506 --> 00:04:17,966
- Uh, Kwan said he'll help me.
- What?
100
00:04:19,217 --> 00:04:21,052
Oh. Yeah, I-I got it.
101
00:04:22,053 --> 00:04:24,597
- Adams, rigs coming in. Grab a gown.
- Uh...
102
00:04:27,141 --> 00:04:28,600
- What are we doing?
- Thank you.
103
00:04:28,601 --> 00:04:30,103
[line ringing]
104
00:04:31,521 --> 00:04:33,356
[phone ringing]
105
00:04:37,151 --> 00:04:38,694
Hey. I was just gonna call you.
106
00:04:38,695 --> 00:04:39,778
Where's Bailey?
107
00:04:39,779 --> 00:04:41,738
Okay, so we're at the hospital.
108
00:04:41,739 --> 00:04:43,408
He has early appendicitis.
109
00:04:43,992 --> 00:04:46,410
They gave him antibiotics
and morphine for the pain.
110
00:04:46,411 --> 00:04:47,744
He's a little out of it.
111
00:04:47,745 --> 00:04:50,122
- He needs an appy. Who's on call?
- Ankrom.
112
00:04:50,123 --> 00:04:51,915
She's gonna call you about consent.
113
00:04:51,916 --> 00:04:53,709
Well, at least someone
was thinking about that.
114
00:04:53,710 --> 00:04:55,127
Yeah, look, I was gonna call, but...
115
00:04:55,128 --> 00:04:57,337
I don't wanna talk about this now.
I have to change my flight.
116
00:04:57,338 --> 00:04:59,673
Tell Bailey I will be there
as soon as I can.
117
00:04:59,674 --> 00:05:00,758
- Okay...
- [line beeps]
118
00:05:01,509 --> 00:05:02,552
Meredith?
119
00:05:03,553 --> 00:05:04,554
Mer?
120
00:05:11,686 --> 00:05:13,437
[siren wailing]
121
00:05:13,438 --> 00:05:14,730
[Hunt] What do we got?
122
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[paramedic 2] Sophia Valdez, 26,
impaled by a wood beam.
123
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Oxygenating at 96% on room air,
hemodynamically stable.
124
00:05:20,028 --> 00:05:22,404
Bilateral neuro deficits
in both lower extremities.
125
00:05:22,405 --> 00:05:24,239
[sobbing] Please, you have to help me.
126
00:05:24,240 --> 00:05:26,241
Sophia, I'm Dr. Hunt.
I know you're in a lot of pain.
127
00:05:26,242 --> 00:05:27,326
This is killing me.
128
00:05:27,327 --> 00:05:29,703
We're gonna do everything in our power
to make sure that won't happen.
129
00:05:29,704 --> 00:05:31,872
[Sophia] No, no. My coat...
They took my white coat.
130
00:05:31,873 --> 00:05:34,082
The one that lets everyone know
I'm gonna be a doctor.
131
00:05:34,083 --> 00:05:35,625
I'll... I'll try to find it for you.
132
00:05:35,626 --> 00:05:37,962
I didn't even get to wear it
at an actual hospital.
133
00:05:38,880 --> 00:05:40,464
[crying] I can't feel my right leg,
134
00:05:40,465 --> 00:05:43,551
and I'm only a first-year,
but that's really bad, right?
135
00:05:44,135 --> 00:05:45,970
Trauma three, page neuro. Let's go.
136
00:05:55,521 --> 00:05:57,648
- Dr. Winston Ndugu?
- Yes?
137
00:06:07,283 --> 00:06:08,700
{\an8}All right, let's make this quick.
138
00:06:08,701 --> 00:06:10,953
{\an8}I've got CCU rounds
and a consult in a bit, all right?
139
00:06:11,662 --> 00:06:14,873
{\an8}Gilbert, sorry for the delay.
I've had a lot of emergent cases today.
140
00:06:14,874 --> 00:06:17,167
{\an8}It's okay. I don't go anywhere anymore.
141
00:06:17,168 --> 00:06:19,127
{\an8}Strange places, loud noises,
sudden movements,
142
00:06:19,128 --> 00:06:21,171
{\an8}they all make my heart go...
[clicks tongue]
143
00:06:21,172 --> 00:06:23,632
{\an8}All right. We'll take care
of that tonight, all right?
144
00:06:23,633 --> 00:06:24,841
{\an8}Dr. Millin?
145
00:06:24,842 --> 00:06:28,345
{\an8}Uh, Gilbert Quincy, 41, intermittent,
rapid and irregular heart rate
146
00:06:28,346 --> 00:06:29,679
{\an8}accompanied by shortness of breath.
147
00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:32,182
{\an8}- Initial diagnosis is SVT...
- Hi.
148
00:06:32,183 --> 00:06:36,395
{\an8}...with AVRT that is resistant
to, uh, medication.
149
00:06:36,396 --> 00:06:39,523
- The patient is scheduled for a, uh...
- [visitor] It's okay.
150
00:06:39,524 --> 00:06:40,774
{\an8}[Gilbert breathing shakily]
151
00:06:40,775 --> 00:06:44,986
{\an8}The patient is scheduled
for a... cardiac ablation.
152
00:06:44,987 --> 00:06:46,488
{\an8}[Gilbert sighs]
153
00:06:46,489 --> 00:06:48,157
{\an8}Well, you know we can see you, right?
154
00:06:48,866 --> 00:06:50,493
{\an8}Angela's a professional cuddler.
155
00:06:51,077 --> 00:06:55,038
{\an8}When the anti-anxiety meds
stopped working, I had to get creative.
156
00:06:55,039 --> 00:06:56,998
{\an8}Oh... [stammers]
157
00:06:56,999 --> 00:06:59,418
{\an8}You charge people to hug them?
158
00:06:59,419 --> 00:07:02,129
{\an8}Cuddling releases endorphins and oxytocin...
159
00:07:02,130 --> 00:07:05,550
- [Gilbert sighs]
- ...which lowers stress and anxiety.
160
00:07:06,384 --> 00:07:08,052
That's fascinating.
161
00:07:09,137 --> 00:07:10,637
Or a racket.
162
00:07:10,638 --> 00:07:13,141
Okay, Gilbert, we gotta check
on your labs, all right?
163
00:07:15,184 --> 00:07:16,394
{\an8}[sighs]
164
00:07:19,147 --> 00:07:21,857
{\an8}This is the worst possible time
to consider having a baby.
165
00:07:21,858 --> 00:07:25,944
{\an8}Work never stops, my written exams are
coming up and Luna's starting preschool...
166
00:07:25,945 --> 00:07:27,029
Oh, my God, the diapers.
167
00:07:27,613 --> 00:07:29,364
{\an8}Do you know how many diapers we would need
168
00:07:29,365 --> 00:07:31,324
{\an8}if we had three kids
who aren't potty trained?
169
00:07:31,325 --> 00:07:33,618
{\an8}Try not to panic. This could be nothing.
170
00:07:33,619 --> 00:07:37,205
{\an8}Six diapers a day per kid.
That's, like, a thousand diapers a week.
171
00:07:37,206 --> 00:07:39,749
{\an8}- Not even close.
- How could this happen? I'm ob-gyn.
172
00:07:39,750 --> 00:07:41,877
{\an8}Half my job is to help women
not get pregnant.
173
00:07:41,878 --> 00:07:43,795
{\an8}- Oh, my God, here it is.
- You're spiraling.
174
00:07:43,796 --> 00:07:45,213
How are you not?
175
00:07:45,214 --> 00:07:47,049
It won't be easy, but we'll figure it out.
176
00:07:47,633 --> 00:07:50,260
Also, we live in a state
where we have options.
177
00:07:50,261 --> 00:07:53,763
{\an8}If that's what you want, or not. I...
[sighs]
178
00:07:53,764 --> 00:07:55,266
{\an8}I just mean
179
00:07:56,017 --> 00:07:58,853
{\an8}we're in this together no matter what.
180
00:07:59,437 --> 00:08:00,605
{\an8}- [phone buzzes, chimes]
- Oh.
181
00:08:02,815 --> 00:08:05,193
{\an8}[groans] Patient with abdominal pain.
182
00:08:05,985 --> 00:08:09,363
{\an8}You do realize this doesn't work
if I take the test.
183
00:08:13,993 --> 00:08:16,953
{\an8}Sorry I'm late. Sophia, I'm Dr. Shepherd.
184
00:08:16,954 --> 00:08:18,288
{\an8}How are you feeling?
185
00:08:18,289 --> 00:08:20,999
{\an8}This isn't exactly
how I pictured my first trauma.
186
00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:22,501
{\an8}How are my X-rays?
187
00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:24,377
{\an8}Okay, no visible injury around the lungs,
188
00:08:24,378 --> 00:08:26,171
{\an8}no free fluid in the abdomen
or around the heart.
189
00:08:26,172 --> 00:08:29,007
{\an8}- She's a first-year med student.
- Got it. Um...
190
00:08:29,008 --> 00:08:30,510
{\an8}Wiggle your toes for me.
191
00:08:32,720 --> 00:08:34,222
[Sophia] Are they moving?
192
00:08:36,098 --> 00:08:38,643
Okay. Can you feel it when I touch here?
193
00:08:39,393 --> 00:08:41,562
Mm-mmm. [whimpers]
194
00:08:43,231 --> 00:08:45,858
- We need a CT right now.
- Okay.
195
00:08:46,651 --> 00:08:48,818
{\an8}[Sophia] I've wanted to be a surgeon
ever since I can remember.
196
00:08:48,819 --> 00:08:51,947
{\an8}I watched Whipples on YouTube as a kid.
197
00:08:51,948 --> 00:08:53,532
{\an8}Have you ever done one?
198
00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:55,700
Oh, my God. Is that...
199
00:08:55,701 --> 00:08:58,703
Yeah, the paramedics were gonna toss it,
but I got there just in time.
200
00:08:58,704 --> 00:09:01,248
{\an8}- [breathes shakily] It's so...
- Sophia. Hey, hey, hey.
201
00:09:01,249 --> 00:09:04,584
{\an8}Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Deep breaths, okay? Stay still.
202
00:09:04,585 --> 00:09:06,670
{\an8}Deep breaths.
I'm gonna take you up to CT now.
203
00:09:06,671 --> 00:09:09,882
{\an8}Okay? Right now.
We're going now. Let's go.
204
00:09:14,095 --> 00:09:15,595
{\an8}[Grey] I don't think you understand.
205
00:09:15,596 --> 00:09:18,724
{\an8}My son is in the hospital.
I need a flight tonight.
206
00:09:20,393 --> 00:09:21,811
{\an8}Yes, I can hold.
207
00:09:25,231 --> 00:09:26,232
{\an8}Meredith?
208
00:09:26,857 --> 00:09:27,857
{\an8}Wh... What's going on?
209
00:09:27,858 --> 00:09:29,609
{\an8}Bailey needs an appendectomy.
210
00:09:29,610 --> 00:09:31,570
{\an8}He's with Nick in Boston.
211
00:09:31,571 --> 00:09:33,488
{\an8}- Can I help?
- Can you fly a plane?
212
00:09:33,489 --> 00:09:37,409
{\an8}- No. But let me call Catherine.
- No, I don't want to bother Catherine.
213
00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:39,996
{\an8}He's your son. Now, come on.
214
00:09:43,374 --> 00:09:44,875
{\an8}All right. Excuse me.
215
00:09:46,586 --> 00:09:49,963
{\an8}Dr. Schmitt, I finished the arm lac
in bed three. What's next?
216
00:09:49,964 --> 00:09:53,466
{\an8}We set up a fast track near bed seven
for the simpler cases.
217
00:09:53,467 --> 00:09:55,719
You should be able
to move through that pretty quickly.
218
00:09:55,720 --> 00:09:58,096
I was the fastest pre-rounder
in medical school.
219
00:09:58,097 --> 00:09:59,140
[Schmitt] Hmm.
220
00:10:00,016 --> 00:10:01,225
All right.
221
00:10:04,979 --> 00:10:07,147
Hi. I'm Dr. Yasuda...
222
00:10:07,148 --> 00:10:08,899
{\an8}[both laughing]
223
00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:11,444
[sighs]
224
00:10:12,361 --> 00:10:14,613
{\an8}[Sophia] Do you have any idea
how much I wanna be you?
225
00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:16,990
{\an8}[Adams] I haven't slept in two days.
You might wanna rethink that.
226
00:10:16,991 --> 00:10:19,659
{\an8}Have you ever wanted a thing
so much, it hurts?
227
00:10:19,660 --> 00:10:25,416
{\an8}Like... Like you can feel it in your body
when you're so close to getting it?
228
00:10:26,959 --> 00:10:30,254
{\an8}Yeah, I... I think I understand.
229
00:10:30,838 --> 00:10:35,467
Then you know... [breathing shakily]
...you have to fix me.
230
00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:36,552
Please.
231
00:10:37,303 --> 00:10:38,679
[Hunt] Adams, let's go.
232
00:10:39,889 --> 00:10:43,391
{\an8}When you see a deck collapse on TV,
are you thinking, "Gee, that's sad,"
233
00:10:43,392 --> 00:10:46,854
{\an8}or are you happy because
of all the traumas? Be honest.
234
00:10:48,105 --> 00:10:49,731
{\an8}[clears throat, sighs]
235
00:10:49,732 --> 00:10:50,816
{\an8}Are you okay?
236
00:10:51,317 --> 00:10:52,525
{\an8}Yeah, I'm fine. [chuckles]
237
00:10:52,526 --> 00:10:54,527
{\an8}[monitors beeping]
238
00:10:54,528 --> 00:10:56,614
{\an8}Scans are up. Adams.
239
00:10:57,990 --> 00:11:03,453
It looks like the wood partially severed
her spinal cord at T4 and T5.
240
00:11:03,454 --> 00:11:04,537
{\an8}Brown-Séquard syndrome.
241
00:11:04,538 --> 00:11:06,456
{\an8}It's an expanding hematoma
in her spinal cord
242
00:11:06,457 --> 00:11:08,083
{\an8}which means the blood supply is tenuous.
243
00:11:08,084 --> 00:11:09,167
So what do you do?
244
00:11:09,168 --> 00:11:12,504
We remove the foreign object,
we irrigate the hematoma,
245
00:11:12,505 --> 00:11:14,297
we close her, and we hope for the best.
246
00:11:14,298 --> 00:11:16,007
{\an8}- Hope?
- [Hunt] Mmm.
247
00:11:16,008 --> 00:11:20,512
{\an8}What... You just... You just hope
that she's gonna be able to walk or stand?
248
00:11:20,513 --> 00:11:23,181
{\an8}Doing more could cause
her entire spinal cord to stroke out.
249
00:11:23,182 --> 00:11:24,809
{\an8}Or she could die from complications.
250
00:11:26,018 --> 00:11:29,312
[sighs] This is her best option.
Let's book an OR.
251
00:11:29,313 --> 00:11:30,648
Mm-hmm.
252
00:11:33,984 --> 00:11:34,985
[sighs]
253
00:11:40,157 --> 00:11:41,534
[yawns]
254
00:11:43,285 --> 00:11:44,285
Tired, Griffith?
255
00:11:44,286 --> 00:11:45,912
A little.
256
00:11:45,913 --> 00:11:50,250
You should be. I checked your hours.
You're almost at your max. Go home.
257
00:11:50,251 --> 00:11:52,460
I'm just waiting
for Eddie Oliver's MRI results.
258
00:11:52,461 --> 00:11:54,754
You know what exhausted interns do?
259
00:11:54,755 --> 00:11:56,464
Make mistakes.
260
00:11:56,465 --> 00:12:00,427
Which makes my life messy.
You want my life to be messy, Griffith?
261
00:12:00,428 --> 00:12:03,556
I will pass it off to Kwan
and then go home. [chuckles]
262
00:12:04,974 --> 00:12:07,142
[sighs] I have to give you my patient.
263
00:12:07,143 --> 00:12:11,062
Uh, if his MRI is clear,
he can be discharged. He's in bed four.
264
00:12:11,063 --> 00:12:12,898
That bed's been empty for a while.
265
00:12:13,399 --> 00:12:14,399
And you did nothing?
266
00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:15,984
[scoffs] He wasn't my patient then.
267
00:12:15,985 --> 00:12:20,447
Bailey will kill us if we let a drunk
medical student loose in the hospital.
268
00:12:20,448 --> 00:12:22,825
- Find him.
- Uh... You lost him.
269
00:12:24,952 --> 00:12:25,953
Shut up and help me.
270
00:12:34,086 --> 00:12:35,628
[line ringing]
271
00:12:35,629 --> 00:12:37,839
- [phone ringing]
- Hi.
272
00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:38,924
How is he?
273
00:12:39,508 --> 00:12:41,177
He's good. They took him to pre-op.
274
00:12:41,677 --> 00:12:44,471
And not before he lobbied the nurse
for Popsicles after he wakes up.
275
00:12:44,472 --> 00:12:46,973
- Well, I should be there by then.
- Good.
276
00:12:46,974 --> 00:12:48,266
He'll be happy.
277
00:12:48,267 --> 00:12:50,186
Well, I could have
been there sooner had I known.
278
00:12:51,103 --> 00:12:52,771
Mer, we're gonna have
this conversation now?
279
00:12:52,772 --> 00:12:54,981
Well, you took my kid to the hospital.
280
00:12:54,982 --> 00:12:57,776
Yeah. He said his stomach hurt
on the way home from hockey practice.
281
00:12:57,777 --> 00:12:59,737
I did a quick exam.
He had rebound tenderness.
282
00:13:00,321 --> 00:13:02,614
I called Ankrom.
She said to bring him in. I mean...
283
00:13:02,615 --> 00:13:04,200
You should have called me.
284
00:13:04,867 --> 00:13:05,909
Yes, I could have.
285
00:13:05,910 --> 00:13:08,495
I wanted to see what the doctor said
before I worried you.
286
00:13:08,496 --> 00:13:10,663
- I am a doctor.
- Yes.
287
00:13:10,664 --> 00:13:11,873
So am I.
288
00:13:11,874 --> 00:13:14,209
I'm his mother. You call me.
289
00:13:14,210 --> 00:13:15,293
Okay, copy that.
290
00:13:15,294 --> 00:13:17,212
- The next time this happens...
- No next time.
291
00:13:17,213 --> 00:13:21,174
If any decisions need to be made,
call me immediately.
292
00:13:21,175 --> 00:13:22,510
[line beeps]
293
00:13:24,845 --> 00:13:26,847
Sounded like that went well.
294
00:13:29,391 --> 00:13:30,643
[Yasuda] Track this for me.
295
00:13:31,227 --> 00:13:32,311
This side.
296
00:13:33,103 --> 00:13:34,814
- Okay, good.
- [patient] Dead. Alive.
297
00:13:36,273 --> 00:13:38,108
- Dead. Alive.
- [heart monitor flatlining]
298
00:13:39,276 --> 00:13:41,736
- Dead. Alive.
- Don't do that.
299
00:13:41,737 --> 00:13:42,947
- Dead.
- [heart monitor flatlining]
300
00:13:47,785 --> 00:13:49,536
I've been running
the fast track area solo.
301
00:13:49,537 --> 00:13:50,829
I heard. That's awesome.
302
00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:55,543
Oh, is it? 'Cause so far,
I've been peed on, spit on, and hit on.
303
00:13:56,210 --> 00:13:58,336
I mean, the first two
were accidents, but still.
304
00:13:58,337 --> 00:13:59,546
Someone hit on you?
305
00:13:59,547 --> 00:14:01,173
That's what you're concerned about?
306
00:14:02,132 --> 00:14:03,550
Can you please swap me out?
307
00:14:03,551 --> 00:14:05,845
- Let me see what I can do.
- Okay.
308
00:14:06,595 --> 00:14:07,638
- Can I have a sandwich?
- No.
309
00:14:08,556 --> 00:14:09,557
Back.
310
00:14:10,391 --> 00:14:11,892
Wheelchair not a toy.
311
00:14:16,689 --> 00:14:18,773
Hey. Gilbert Quincy still isn't prepped.
312
00:14:18,774 --> 00:14:21,943
His heart rate kept going up
while she was doing the echo.
313
00:14:21,944 --> 00:14:25,738
I suggest we wait another 30 minutes
before trying again.
314
00:14:25,739 --> 00:14:27,824
Look, I've been on my feet
since 5:00 this morning
315
00:14:27,825 --> 00:14:29,367
and I've got eight hours ahead of me.
316
00:14:29,368 --> 00:14:31,452
I'm not going to shift around my schedule
317
00:14:31,453 --> 00:14:33,788
because my patient needs
a human weighted blanket.
318
00:14:33,789 --> 00:14:37,792
Uh... Angela, would you please
go check on Gilbert?
319
00:14:37,793 --> 00:14:40,086
- We'll be in with you in a minute.
- [sighs]
320
00:14:40,087 --> 00:14:41,171
Thank you.
321
00:14:45,175 --> 00:14:48,011
You're an intern.
I give you a task, you do it. Understood?
322
00:14:48,012 --> 00:14:49,096
Get the echo.
323
00:14:50,347 --> 00:14:51,640
I will try again.
324
00:14:53,601 --> 00:14:54,851
You know, actually, no.
325
00:14:54,852 --> 00:14:56,728
You can do it intraoperatively
while he's asleep.
326
00:14:56,729 --> 00:14:57,813
Excuse me?
327
00:14:58,606 --> 00:15:00,607
I know what I'm about to say
is way out of line,
328
00:15:00,608 --> 00:15:02,735
but it's late
and I think you need to hear it.
329
00:15:03,444 --> 00:15:07,989
You used to be the coolest attending.
Everybody wanted to be on your service.
330
00:15:07,990 --> 00:15:12,201
- But lately, you've kinda been a jerk.
- Correct. This is way out of line. Yes.
331
00:15:12,202 --> 00:15:16,956
Okay, I am desperate to learn from you,
but not if it means being disrespected
332
00:15:16,957 --> 00:15:19,751
or standing by
while you disrespect our patients.
333
00:15:19,752 --> 00:15:21,920
Gilbert is in pain. He is scared.
334
00:15:21,921 --> 00:15:25,673
And if paying someone to hug him
helps him with that, who are we to judge?
335
00:15:25,674 --> 00:15:28,719
I want the patient prepped
within 20 minutes.
336
00:15:35,225 --> 00:15:36,602
[Shepherd] Are you okay?
337
00:15:37,478 --> 00:15:39,480
I've never been in an OR before.
338
00:15:40,064 --> 00:15:43,858
Um... My... My dad said the OR
had an invisible energy.
339
00:15:43,859 --> 00:15:46,904
- [Hunt chuckles]
- Like the Force in Star Wars.
340
00:15:48,364 --> 00:15:49,364
Now I get it.
341
00:15:49,365 --> 00:15:51,366
Well, what kind of surgeon is your dad?
342
00:15:51,367 --> 00:15:54,411
Trauma. But he died two years ago.
343
00:15:55,120 --> 00:15:56,163
Okay.
344
00:15:56,747 --> 00:15:58,331
[Shepherd]
We are gonna start the anesthesia.
345
00:15:58,332 --> 00:15:59,416
Are you ready?
346
00:16:00,292 --> 00:16:02,294
Can you make sure
my coat is with my stuff?
347
00:16:02,795 --> 00:16:05,546
I don't care if it's ruined.
I still wanna keep it.
348
00:16:05,547 --> 00:16:06,924
- [Hunt] Of course.
- [Shepherd] Mm-hmm.
349
00:16:08,050 --> 00:16:09,384
Okay.
350
00:16:09,385 --> 00:16:10,761
I-I'm ready.
351
00:16:25,317 --> 00:16:27,611
[scoffs] Eddie's MRI is clear.
352
00:16:28,487 --> 00:16:30,780
[stammers] Maybe he went home.
Did you try and give him a call?
353
00:16:30,781 --> 00:16:31,948
I have been with you.
354
00:16:31,949 --> 00:16:34,492
[sighs] Okay. Give me the number.
355
00:16:34,493 --> 00:16:35,619
Thank you.
356
00:16:36,787 --> 00:16:38,162
[line rings]
357
00:16:38,163 --> 00:16:40,164
- You have reached the voicemail of...
- Voicemail.
358
00:16:40,165 --> 00:16:43,084
I can't believe I lost a patient.
Bailey is going to fire me.
359
00:16:43,085 --> 00:16:45,170
Is he in a plaid shirt with a sling?
360
00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:48,715
Is your missing patient wearing
a plaid shirt and a sling on his arm?
361
00:16:48,716 --> 00:16:51,010
- Yes.
- Yeah, I saw him near the stairwell.
362
00:16:52,553 --> 00:16:55,681
Uh, the one by the west elevator.
Goes to the roof.
363
00:17:01,603 --> 00:17:03,688
- [sirens wailing]
- [door opens]
364
00:17:03,689 --> 00:17:06,650
- [Kwan grunts, shudders]
- [Griffith scoffs]
365
00:17:07,234 --> 00:17:11,238
[Kwan] Great. A windy outdoor version
of what we've been doing all night.
366
00:17:12,698 --> 00:17:14,282
[Griffith pants] Oh, please.
367
00:17:14,283 --> 00:17:15,743
[Kwan sighs]
368
00:17:17,327 --> 00:17:18,537
- [Griffith] Hey.
- What?
369
00:17:19,913 --> 00:17:20,956
Eddie.
370
00:17:24,168 --> 00:17:26,794
Can you... come down from there?
We've got your MRI results.
371
00:17:26,795 --> 00:17:28,004
Am I dying?
372
00:17:28,005 --> 00:17:29,798
No, you're fine.
373
00:17:30,382 --> 00:17:31,382
Let's go back in.
374
00:17:31,383 --> 00:17:33,719
Yeah, we'll discharge you
and you can go home.
375
00:17:38,557 --> 00:17:40,225
Eddie? [panting]
376
00:17:41,018 --> 00:17:42,352
What if I didn't go home?
377
00:17:45,272 --> 00:17:46,481
You thought losing him was bad?
378
00:17:46,482 --> 00:17:49,901
How about the headline:
"Drunk Med Student Falls off Hospital"?
379
00:17:49,902 --> 00:17:52,071
He's completely sober
according to his labs.
380
00:17:53,322 --> 00:17:54,323
Or if I just...
381
00:17:56,950 --> 00:17:58,160
let the wind decide?
382
00:18:10,255 --> 00:18:11,965
[phone buzzes, chimes]
383
00:18:14,134 --> 00:18:15,301
[Webber] Oh.
384
00:18:15,302 --> 00:18:16,929
[grunts] Anything new?
385
00:18:18,055 --> 00:18:19,264
Still in surgery.
386
00:18:20,432 --> 00:18:22,683
I wish I could see into that OR.
387
00:18:22,684 --> 00:18:25,770
The last thing a surgeon needs
is to have the patient's mom
388
00:18:25,771 --> 00:18:27,271
looking over their shoulder.
389
00:18:27,272 --> 00:18:29,107
Even more so if it's Meredith Grey.
390
00:18:29,108 --> 00:18:31,150
Even the best hands make mistakes.
391
00:18:31,151 --> 00:18:34,612
Bleeding. Perforations.
It's the middle of the night.
392
00:18:34,613 --> 00:18:36,489
They're tired. Mistakes happen.
393
00:18:36,490 --> 00:18:38,241
They could, but most
of the time they don't.
394
00:18:38,242 --> 00:18:41,578
And most of the time,
people who need craniotomies get head CTs.
395
00:18:44,164 --> 00:18:46,999
I'm sorry. I'm fine. I just...
396
00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:50,253
It's just when things like this happen,
I know it's not Derek. I...
397
00:18:50,254 --> 00:18:52,589
I understand. No apologies needed.
398
00:18:57,344 --> 00:19:00,889
[Griffith] It's cold. Let's go in,
get some coffee. Find your friends.
399
00:19:01,390 --> 00:19:02,391
I'm fine here.
400
00:19:03,267 --> 00:19:04,852
We can't leave you here.
401
00:19:07,396 --> 00:19:09,022
Hey, Eddie. Did you...
402
00:19:10,399 --> 00:19:12,234
Did you come up here to hurt yourself?
403
00:19:17,698 --> 00:19:18,699
I don't know.
404
00:19:21,285 --> 00:19:23,579
- Are you having thoughts of suicide?
- I...
405
00:19:26,039 --> 00:19:27,040
I guess.
406
00:19:27,875 --> 00:19:28,876
Sometimes.
407
00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:35,132
I'm here if you wanna talk. We both are.
408
00:19:37,384 --> 00:19:39,845
Maybe you could sit down.
You've had a long night.
409
00:20:01,533 --> 00:20:02,743
[Eddie] Seems darker up here.
410
00:20:05,621 --> 00:20:06,622
The city.
411
00:20:08,248 --> 00:20:09,666
[mouthing] Text Bailey.
412
00:20:12,628 --> 00:20:15,214
Did you move here for med school
or is Seattle home?
413
00:20:16,006 --> 00:20:17,465
[patient] You know, you're really pretty.
414
00:20:17,466 --> 00:20:19,133
Yeah, thank you. Okay.
415
00:20:19,134 --> 00:20:20,219
You like me?
416
00:20:20,802 --> 00:20:21,803
Sure.
417
00:20:22,554 --> 00:20:25,139
Don't touch that
'cause you're gonna open the sutures.
418
00:20:25,140 --> 00:20:26,225
Okay?
419
00:20:26,892 --> 00:20:30,896
- Stop. Stop. Okay. You know what?
- I'm not doing...
420
00:20:31,480 --> 00:20:34,023
Your hand is contaminated
and if you're not gonna listen,
421
00:20:34,024 --> 00:20:35,942
- I have to do this. I'm sorry, I have to.
- What...
422
00:20:35,943 --> 00:20:38,277
This is just what has
to happen right now, okay?
423
00:20:38,278 --> 00:20:42,198
This is malpractice.
Hey, she's malpracticing me.
424
00:20:42,199 --> 00:20:44,826
Um. Can I get another banana bag, please?
425
00:20:45,410 --> 00:20:46,702
[yelps]
426
00:20:46,703 --> 00:20:48,538
[patient 2 chuckling]
427
00:20:50,457 --> 00:20:51,458
No.
428
00:20:58,423 --> 00:20:59,424
[scoffs]
429
00:21:00,008 --> 00:21:01,009
Hey, baby.
430
00:21:02,010 --> 00:21:03,761
Uh... I thought
you weren't working tonight.
431
00:21:03,762 --> 00:21:05,680
[chuckles] Well, I could say
the same thing about you.
432
00:21:05,681 --> 00:21:07,391
- [stammers]
- Yeah, they needed a sub.
433
00:21:07,891 --> 00:21:10,601
Wow. That med student party
was a real rager, huh?
434
00:21:10,602 --> 00:21:13,771
Yeah, I caught one of 'em trying
to order pizza over at bed four.
435
00:21:13,772 --> 00:21:16,275
- [chuckles]
- Wait, Tuck's at home?
436
00:21:16,984 --> 00:21:20,528
Did you remind him to lock the door
and turn on the alarm?
437
00:21:20,529 --> 00:21:21,946
To...
438
00:21:21,947 --> 00:21:22,990
Ah.
439
00:21:24,157 --> 00:21:26,784
- You didn't think I remembered.
- [stammers, chuckles]
440
00:21:26,785 --> 00:21:28,035
- [phone chimes]
- Oh.
441
00:21:28,036 --> 00:21:29,870
- Uh-oh.
- What? What happened?
442
00:21:29,871 --> 00:21:33,708
Interns found a missing
patient on the roof.
443
00:21:33,709 --> 00:21:35,543
They're worried that he wants to jump off.
444
00:21:35,544 --> 00:21:38,088
- Okay, well, tell 'em we're on the way.
- Okay. Uh...
445
00:21:39,506 --> 00:21:40,715
[Hunt sighs]
446
00:21:40,716 --> 00:21:43,134
Do you remember how it felt
to be that excited about surgery?
447
00:21:43,135 --> 00:21:44,844
[Shepherd] Yeah, it was like a drug that,
448
00:21:44,845 --> 00:21:47,221
unlike the other drugs I was into,
couldn't kill me.
449
00:21:47,222 --> 00:21:48,889
- [Hunt chuckles]
- Prepare for the specimen.
450
00:21:48,890 --> 00:21:51,935
I don't remember the last time
operating gave me that kind of rush.
451
00:21:52,728 --> 00:21:55,104
Okay, removing the foreign object
in three.
452
00:21:55,105 --> 00:21:58,775
One. Two. Three. [grunts]
453
00:21:59,735 --> 00:22:01,277
- [Shepherd] Bovie.
- [Hunt] Irrigation.
454
00:22:01,278 --> 00:22:02,862
[Shepherd] Let's get this bleeding
under control.
455
00:22:02,863 --> 00:22:04,613
- Wash her out and get ready to close.
- [Hunt] Okay.
456
00:22:04,614 --> 00:22:06,408
- And let's hope for the best.
- Okay.
457
00:22:06,950 --> 00:22:08,826
[Hunt] These edges are cleaner
than I thought they'd be.
458
00:22:08,827 --> 00:22:12,039
No significant tissue loss.
Bleeding's subsided.
459
00:22:12,831 --> 00:22:14,957
You're gonna ask me
to do a primary repair, aren't you?
460
00:22:14,958 --> 00:22:16,584
That's not the standard of care.
461
00:22:16,585 --> 00:22:18,669
I saw a lot of penetrating injuries
like this in Iraq,
462
00:22:18,670 --> 00:22:21,630
and I've seen primary repairs
work on nerves and extremities.
463
00:22:21,631 --> 00:22:23,758
It doesn't come close to a spinal cord.
464
00:22:23,759 --> 00:22:25,552
[Hunt] But if you were going to do it?
465
00:22:27,471 --> 00:22:29,347
I would need an ORBEYE.
466
00:22:29,348 --> 00:22:33,476
I'd use 10-0 nylon. Layer by layer
I would need to expose the spinal cord...
467
00:22:33,477 --> 00:22:34,894
I can't guarantee the outcome.
468
00:22:34,895 --> 00:22:36,395
There's risky, and then there's this.
469
00:22:36,396 --> 00:22:37,731
[Adams] She'd want you to do it.
470
00:22:38,523 --> 00:22:41,151
Sorry. But sh-she'd want you to try.
471
00:22:42,319 --> 00:22:45,489
It would kill her to know
there was a chance and you didn't take it.
472
00:22:48,075 --> 00:22:49,867
All right. This is gonna be long
and tedious.
473
00:22:49,868 --> 00:22:51,202
I need an ORBEYE.
474
00:22:51,203 --> 00:22:53,829
I need everyone in lockstep. Are you in?
475
00:22:53,830 --> 00:22:56,541
- [Hunt] I suggested it.
- All right.
476
00:23:00,003 --> 00:23:01,004
Okay.
477
00:23:01,838 --> 00:23:02,839
[sighs] I can't look at it.
478
00:23:04,299 --> 00:23:06,551
- Did you pee on this?
- Just read it.
479
00:23:08,345 --> 00:23:09,721
It's negative.
480
00:23:10,555 --> 00:23:11,598
Whew.
481
00:23:13,350 --> 00:23:16,061
What happened to we're in this together?
482
00:23:16,561 --> 00:23:18,646
You... You were spiraling.
483
00:23:18,647 --> 00:23:21,565
Short of traveling back
and getting a vasectomy.
484
00:23:21,566 --> 00:23:24,026
It was the only thing I could think of
to make you feel better.
485
00:23:24,027 --> 00:23:26,362
The idea of having a baby
with me is so awful
486
00:23:26,363 --> 00:23:28,280
you would rather have a vasectomy?
487
00:23:28,281 --> 00:23:30,282
No. [stammers]
488
00:23:30,283 --> 00:23:33,537
- A thousand diapers a week!
- That was an exaggeration!
489
00:23:34,329 --> 00:23:35,330
Hi.
490
00:23:37,290 --> 00:23:39,126
I love being a dad.
491
00:23:39,626 --> 00:23:42,420
And as much as I would love
to do it all over again with you,
492
00:23:42,421 --> 00:23:43,839
and only with you, I...
493
00:23:44,589 --> 00:23:46,799
I'm tired. It's hard.
494
00:23:46,800 --> 00:23:48,427
Just give me this.
495
00:23:51,596 --> 00:23:54,266
[whispers] It's not negative.
496
00:23:55,600 --> 00:23:56,600
You... You're pregnant?
497
00:23:56,601 --> 00:23:59,395
- It's not positive either.
- Is there a third option?
498
00:23:59,396 --> 00:24:01,439
One line is negative, two is positive.
499
00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:03,859
- Th-There's no lines.
- It's a dud.
500
00:24:06,653 --> 00:24:07,654
Oh.
501
00:24:10,907 --> 00:24:12,284
[coughs]
502
00:24:14,494 --> 00:24:16,370
[groans] Can... Can we slow down?
503
00:24:16,371 --> 00:24:19,248
If we go any slower, we'll have to
push your surgery to tomorrow.
504
00:24:19,249 --> 00:24:22,168
[stammering] Stop! Stop! I can't do this.
I can't. I have to get off.
505
00:24:22,169 --> 00:24:23,502
- I have to...
- No, no, no.
506
00:24:23,503 --> 00:24:25,129
You can do this. You can do this.
507
00:24:25,130 --> 00:24:26,338
- Should we call Angela?
- No! No.
508
00:24:26,339 --> 00:24:28,632
She charges by the hour.
I'm sorry, I'm really trying.
509
00:24:28,633 --> 00:24:31,802
But my relaxation techniques aren't
even working and I'm... I can't breathe.
510
00:24:31,803 --> 00:24:35,097
And my fingers are tingling. I'm...
I'm alone and I'm hot. Why is it so hot?
511
00:24:35,098 --> 00:24:37,391
- Dr. Ndugu. What are you doing?
- [Ndugu] May I?
512
00:24:37,392 --> 00:24:39,685
If his heart rate doesn't slow down,
he can go into defib.
513
00:24:39,686 --> 00:24:41,729
- [hyperventilating]
- Come on. Breathe.
514
00:24:41,730 --> 00:24:45,191
You're okay. You're okay. You're okay.
Breathe with me. Breathe with me.
515
00:24:45,192 --> 00:24:47,276
- Breathe with me.
- [inhales deeply, exhales]
516
00:24:47,277 --> 00:24:48,361
Yep.
517
00:24:49,112 --> 00:24:50,489
Okay, nice and slow.
518
00:24:52,240 --> 00:24:54,159
Good. Let's go.
519
00:24:55,994 --> 00:24:57,662
- [Gilbert sighing]
- Here you go.
520
00:25:07,756 --> 00:25:10,217
I remember my white coat ceremony,
my dad flew in.
521
00:25:11,134 --> 00:25:13,010
But it was raining, so traffic was awful.
522
00:25:13,011 --> 00:25:15,305
He walked in
right as I was reciting the oath.
523
00:25:17,349 --> 00:25:19,226
Barely passed my biochem test.
524
00:25:20,352 --> 00:25:21,353
It's okay.
525
00:25:22,354 --> 00:25:23,355
I studied.
526
00:25:24,397 --> 00:25:25,815
I even went to see a tutor.
527
00:25:27,567 --> 00:25:30,237
I busted my ass
and I still couldn't even catch up.
528
00:25:30,946 --> 00:25:34,449
Biochem is like learning another language.
529
00:25:38,161 --> 00:25:39,162
So much reading.
530
00:25:41,414 --> 00:25:42,541
So many tests.
531
00:25:44,125 --> 00:25:46,378
You know, it's like I try to sleep,
but I can't.
532
00:25:49,756 --> 00:25:50,757
I think, uh...
533
00:25:54,052 --> 00:25:55,053
Say it.
534
00:25:55,971 --> 00:25:57,972
Sometimes just saying it helps.
535
00:25:57,973 --> 00:25:59,432
[scoffs]
536
00:26:00,892 --> 00:26:01,893
I think I'm broken.
537
00:26:08,817 --> 00:26:10,318
I don't deserve this anymore.
538
00:26:12,070 --> 00:26:13,613
[gasps] Eddie!
539
00:26:19,661 --> 00:26:20,662
[phone buzzes]
540
00:26:27,335 --> 00:26:31,005
Oh... Damn it, Griffith.
I told her to go home.
541
00:26:31,006 --> 00:26:33,008
Yeah, well,
it's a good thing she didn't listen.
542
00:26:35,719 --> 00:26:37,928
Has he said anything
about wanting to jump?
543
00:26:37,929 --> 00:26:39,556
[Kwan stammers]
544
00:26:40,181 --> 00:26:41,890
- No.
- Good.
545
00:26:41,891 --> 00:26:44,476
All right, well then,
keep doing what you're doing.
546
00:26:44,477 --> 00:26:46,312
[Kwan] He's standing on a ledge.
547
00:26:46,313 --> 00:26:49,148
There's a difference between
a suicide attempt and ideation.
548
00:26:49,149 --> 00:26:50,816
All right. Right now, he's talking to her.
549
00:26:50,817 --> 00:26:53,027
He's engaging with her
and answering her questions.
550
00:26:53,028 --> 00:26:55,487
But he's-he's inches away
from a seven-story drop.
551
00:26:55,488 --> 00:26:57,364
And if we abruptly change
the situation on him,
552
00:26:57,365 --> 00:26:58,949
we might make it worse.
553
00:26:58,950 --> 00:27:03,413
- So calm down. Keep him talking.
- [sighs]
554
00:27:05,874 --> 00:27:08,876
Hey, hey, hey. Hey, look at me.
Look at me. Look at me.
555
00:27:08,877 --> 00:27:13,506
- Hmm?
- Five. Four. Three.
556
00:27:14,090 --> 00:27:15,799
- Two.
- [Bailey sighs]
557
00:27:15,800 --> 00:27:18,177
One. Okay?
558
00:27:18,178 --> 00:27:20,179
Any sign this becomes unstable...
559
00:27:20,180 --> 00:27:21,306
We will intervene.
560
00:27:32,817 --> 00:27:33,818
Hey.
561
00:27:34,736 --> 00:27:37,237
Surgery went well.
The appendix didn't rupture.
562
00:27:37,238 --> 00:27:38,781
- He's still out?
- You know him.
563
00:27:38,782 --> 00:27:42,118
He could sleep through a monster truck
rally without anesthesia.
564
00:27:43,745 --> 00:27:44,913
You can go.
565
00:27:47,874 --> 00:27:49,625
I... I don't need to.
566
00:27:49,626 --> 00:27:50,710
You can go.
567
00:27:52,337 --> 00:27:53,630
Okay.
568
00:27:56,216 --> 00:27:58,217
His... His vitals look good.
569
00:27:58,218 --> 00:28:00,469
I'll... I'll let you two have some time,
570
00:28:00,470 --> 00:28:02,931
but I'll be close
in case you need anything.
571
00:28:03,723 --> 00:28:06,558
Thank you for getting me here.
572
00:28:06,559 --> 00:28:09,103
And for listening to me.
And being there for me.
573
00:28:09,104 --> 00:28:11,022
You know I would do more if I could.
574
00:28:11,690 --> 00:28:12,857
I really am fine.
575
00:28:16,236 --> 00:28:17,946
I mean, of course I miss him. I...
576
00:28:19,739 --> 00:28:23,742
It's... It's just really only when the kids
wake up in the middle of the night.
577
00:28:23,743 --> 00:28:27,288
And I don't have anyone to talk to. And...
578
00:28:27,997 --> 00:28:30,541
Anyway, you helped me more than you know.
579
00:28:30,542 --> 00:28:32,043
Aw, I was glad to do it.
580
00:28:33,378 --> 00:28:37,340
But, uh, you know I wasn't the only one
you had to talk with.
581
00:28:41,261 --> 00:28:43,012
- Mom?
- Hi.
582
00:28:43,638 --> 00:28:45,098
How do you feel?
583
00:28:45,765 --> 00:28:47,225
Where's Nick?
584
00:28:48,977 --> 00:28:51,019
[Shepherd]
Pia mater has been approximated.
585
00:28:51,020 --> 00:28:52,188
Cut please.
586
00:28:55,150 --> 00:28:56,775
Wait. There's bleeding.
587
00:28:56,776 --> 00:28:57,901
[Hunter] Suction.
588
00:28:57,902 --> 00:28:59,945
[Shepherd] Wait, no suction.
No, it's too friable.
589
00:28:59,946 --> 00:29:02,573
If we suction,
we could lose spinal nerve tissue.
590
00:29:02,574 --> 00:29:04,450
- We need to stop the bleeding.
- We can irrigate
591
00:29:04,451 --> 00:29:07,453
and then use Gelfoam
soaked in dexamethasone.
592
00:29:07,454 --> 00:29:08,620
[Hunt] Let's keep it quiet.
593
00:29:08,621 --> 00:29:11,666
We know it's been a long night,
but we're on the homestretch, okay?
594
00:29:18,131 --> 00:29:21,884
- Bleeding has stopped. Gelfoam, please.
- [Hunt] Do you need a dural patch?
595
00:29:21,885 --> 00:29:23,427
No, I'm good.
596
00:29:23,428 --> 00:29:26,847
I can't believe I'm saying this,
but we can prep to close.
597
00:29:26,848 --> 00:29:28,098
[Hunt sighs]
598
00:29:28,099 --> 00:29:29,601
- You did it.
- We did.
599
00:29:30,977 --> 00:29:34,021
All right, wait to see that work
before you start gloating up there.
600
00:29:34,022 --> 00:29:36,691
- [Hunt] Hmm.
- [Shepherd] Okay. Irrigation.
601
00:29:47,118 --> 00:29:48,119
How'd it go?
602
00:29:48,661 --> 00:29:51,080
Good. Yeah. He's gonna wake up
a new person.
603
00:29:51,873 --> 00:29:53,832
I don't think we would have
gotten him into the OR
604
00:29:53,833 --> 00:29:55,834
if you hadn't jumped on the gurney
when you did.
605
00:29:55,835 --> 00:30:00,131
Yeah, well, gotta be honest,
it's not my usual strategy.
606
00:30:01,716 --> 00:30:03,342
Uh... Dr. Ndugu.
607
00:30:03,343 --> 00:30:08,847
Um, I wanted to say that I am really sorry
for what I said earlier.
608
00:30:08,848 --> 00:30:11,350
Not only was it inappropriate
and disrespectful, but...
609
00:30:11,351 --> 00:30:12,601
It was right.
610
00:30:12,602 --> 00:30:15,230
I haven't been bringing
my best self to work lately.
611
00:30:16,314 --> 00:30:21,193
Things in my personal life
are complicated, but it's no excuse.
612
00:30:21,194 --> 00:30:23,195
You... You don't
have to explain yourself to me.
613
00:30:23,196 --> 00:30:26,490
No, I know. But I'm the coolest attending.
614
00:30:26,491 --> 00:30:27,741
[both chuckle]
615
00:30:27,742 --> 00:30:29,077
You did good work today.
616
00:30:33,122 --> 00:30:34,123
[sighs]
617
00:30:36,918 --> 00:30:37,919
[Griffith] You hungry?
618
00:30:39,170 --> 00:30:40,922
Cafeteria has pretty good fries.
619
00:30:41,840 --> 00:30:44,049
When did you feel like you were a doctor?
620
00:30:44,050 --> 00:30:48,012
I don't know.
Maybe a couple of weeks into residency.
621
00:30:51,432 --> 00:30:53,101
Someone called me doctor tonight.
622
00:30:55,103 --> 00:30:56,312
Patient in the elevator.
623
00:30:59,107 --> 00:31:01,526
Guess he just saw the coat and assumed.
624
00:31:03,152 --> 00:31:04,153
I didn't correct him.
625
00:31:04,654 --> 00:31:05,655
That's okay.
626
00:31:07,031 --> 00:31:08,324
[Eddie] It's a sham.
627
00:31:09,409 --> 00:31:10,994
Not even sure what I am anymore.
628
00:31:11,494 --> 00:31:12,786
[sighs]
629
00:31:12,787 --> 00:31:14,247
I'm a guy just...
630
00:31:16,291 --> 00:31:17,834
just going through the motions.
631
00:31:19,460 --> 00:31:20,879
I take light-rail to school.
632
00:31:21,629 --> 00:31:23,172
And every morning, I think...
633
00:31:25,842 --> 00:31:28,720
what if I just fell onto the tracks?
634
00:31:30,179 --> 00:31:31,931
Everyone else has it all figured out.
635
00:31:32,432 --> 00:31:33,600
But I don't.
636
00:31:35,768 --> 00:31:40,106
I-I don't know how to live
with all of the, um...
637
00:31:41,858 --> 00:31:43,192
Pressure and all the pain?
638
00:31:45,987 --> 00:31:47,030
I didn't either.
639
00:31:48,031 --> 00:31:49,323
A lot of people don't.
640
00:31:49,324 --> 00:31:51,534
Doesn't matter how they make it look.
641
00:31:54,245 --> 00:31:55,246
You're not alone.
642
00:31:55,914 --> 00:31:57,123
And on most days,
643
00:31:58,666 --> 00:32:00,376
I still don't feel like a doctor.
644
00:32:01,794 --> 00:32:03,296
But I'm still here.
645
00:32:04,297 --> 00:32:05,590
Let us get you some help.
646
00:32:09,260 --> 00:32:10,303
Hmm?
647
00:32:19,103 --> 00:32:20,104
[sighs]
648
00:32:23,107 --> 00:32:24,150
[Eddie grunts]
649
00:32:30,823 --> 00:32:31,991
[sobbing]
650
00:32:53,137 --> 00:32:54,138
Hi.
651
00:32:54,764 --> 00:32:56,182
Do you have a minute?
652
00:33:00,353 --> 00:33:01,479
Two days.
653
00:33:02,188 --> 00:33:04,649
- Excuse me?
- I've been with your kids for two days.
654
00:33:05,149 --> 00:33:07,985
I got them to school.
I got them to practice and rehearsal.
655
00:33:07,986 --> 00:33:09,695
I made sure they ate, they slept.
656
00:33:09,696 --> 00:33:10,779
And when one of them felt sick,
657
00:33:10,780 --> 00:33:12,614
out of an abundance of caution,
I brought him here.
658
00:33:12,615 --> 00:33:14,574
Now, yes, I guess
I could have called on the way,
659
00:33:14,575 --> 00:33:17,035
but I was busy making
arrangements with your nanny
660
00:33:17,036 --> 00:33:18,913
to take care of Zola and Ellis.
661
00:33:19,747 --> 00:33:23,126
- My kid was sick, and I wasn't here.
- [sighs] Mm-hmm.
662
00:33:23,751 --> 00:33:25,461
And I feel really guilty about that.
663
00:33:26,045 --> 00:33:27,212
I'm all they have.
664
00:33:27,213 --> 00:33:28,547
But you're not.
665
00:33:28,548 --> 00:33:31,050
I mean, yes, you're their mom. Of course.
666
00:33:31,634 --> 00:33:33,594
But they have so many
people that love them.
667
00:33:34,637 --> 00:33:36,389
Look, I know I'm not their father.
668
00:33:37,348 --> 00:33:39,892
I know that, but I care about them a lot.
669
00:33:40,393 --> 00:33:42,561
- And I want you to trust me with them.
- I do trust you.
670
00:33:42,562 --> 00:33:44,062
It doesn't feel like it.
671
00:33:44,063 --> 00:33:45,440
I'm sorry.
672
00:33:46,024 --> 00:33:47,108
I panicked.
673
00:33:47,817 --> 00:33:51,194
I actually came here to say I'm sorry.
674
00:33:51,195 --> 00:33:52,279
["In Between" playing]
675
00:33:52,280 --> 00:33:53,823
Because I know I panic.
676
00:33:54,615 --> 00:33:55,908
And I was tired.
677
00:33:59,120 --> 00:34:00,955
But I know that I said some things
678
00:34:02,081 --> 00:34:04,624
that were probably
pretty unnecessary to say.
679
00:34:04,625 --> 00:34:06,502
- So...
- A few things.
680
00:34:07,086 --> 00:34:09,838
Okay. I've been doing
this a long time alone,
681
00:34:09,839 --> 00:34:13,842
so it may just take me a minute to adjust.
682
00:34:13,843 --> 00:34:15,094
Hey, come here.
683
00:34:15,845 --> 00:34:17,722
Look, I got a minute.
684
00:34:18,973 --> 00:34:20,933
- [sighs]
- Okay?
685
00:34:21,434 --> 00:34:22,435
Okay.
686
00:34:23,978 --> 00:34:27,148
♪ And now ♪
687
00:34:29,567 --> 00:34:36,198
♪ Somewhere in between right here ♪
688
00:34:36,199 --> 00:34:38,408
♪ Right here and now ♪
689
00:34:38,409 --> 00:34:39,452
I'm not pregnant.
690
00:34:40,661 --> 00:34:41,662
[sighs]
691
00:34:42,830 --> 00:34:45,458
Are you disappointed?
692
00:34:48,377 --> 00:34:49,837
I think I want another kid.
693
00:34:51,214 --> 00:34:53,173
I thought you said
you didn't want biological kids.
694
00:34:53,174 --> 00:34:55,676
I didn't, but this would be with you.
695
00:34:57,470 --> 00:34:59,137
And you don't have to decide right now,
696
00:34:59,138 --> 00:35:02,182
and I wouldn't want to do it
until Luna is a little bit older.
697
00:35:02,183 --> 00:35:05,185
But I wanna do this right.
698
00:35:05,186 --> 00:35:06,270
Us.
699
00:35:07,063 --> 00:35:10,441
Which means I want you to know
everything that's in my head.
700
00:35:11,150 --> 00:35:13,401
No matter how terrifying it might be.
701
00:35:13,402 --> 00:35:20,117
♪ Here and now ♪
702
00:35:20,118 --> 00:35:22,328
If you want to have a baby together, then...
703
00:35:24,914 --> 00:35:26,039
I can get there.
704
00:35:26,040 --> 00:35:27,124
[chuckles]
705
00:35:27,125 --> 00:35:28,918
It's just gonna take me some time.
706
00:35:29,418 --> 00:35:30,711
Okay.
707
00:35:33,506 --> 00:35:37,135
[sighs] We still have to pick up
the babies we do have.
708
00:35:38,052 --> 00:35:39,052
Right.
709
00:35:39,053 --> 00:35:42,597
♪ Right here
Right here and now ♪
710
00:35:42,598 --> 00:35:47,727
♪ Does anybody know
Where the pretty horses go? ♪
711
00:35:47,728 --> 00:35:49,020
[Schmitt sighs]
712
00:35:49,021 --> 00:35:51,398
I smell like puke
and I haven't had time to change.
713
00:35:51,399 --> 00:35:53,150
Mmm. Too tired to notice.
714
00:35:53,151 --> 00:35:55,736
[grunts, sighs]
715
00:35:56,487 --> 00:35:58,446
Did you know fast track
was going to suck that much
716
00:35:58,447 --> 00:35:59,865
when you assigned me?
717
00:35:59,866 --> 00:36:01,450
My night wasn't much better.
718
00:36:02,368 --> 00:36:04,286
[sighs]
719
00:36:04,287 --> 00:36:09,000
Well, I should probably go back
to the hellish life I've chosen.
720
00:36:09,584 --> 00:36:12,043
At least you're done with medical school.
[chuckling]
721
00:36:12,044 --> 00:36:13,629
Amen to that.
722
00:36:16,507 --> 00:36:18,300
Hey, I'm sorry about last night.
723
00:36:18,301 --> 00:36:23,639
I tried to put you on that impalement
but my "co-chief" overruled me.
724
00:36:29,687 --> 00:36:31,271
You actually repaired it.
725
00:36:31,272 --> 00:36:33,064
Like, I'll be able to walk.
726
00:36:33,065 --> 00:36:35,442
Our hope is you will regain full function.
727
00:36:35,443 --> 00:36:37,110
[chuckles]
728
00:36:37,111 --> 00:36:38,946
Can you wiggle your toes for me?
729
00:36:43,075 --> 00:36:44,409
[Sophia] Am I doing it?
730
00:36:44,410 --> 00:36:47,037
- [chuckles] Looks like it.
- [Shepherd chuckles]
731
00:36:47,038 --> 00:36:50,790
I never thought performing a basic
motor function would make me so happy.
732
00:36:50,791 --> 00:36:53,377
- [Sophia chuckles]
- Well, we will let you get some rest.
733
00:36:53,878 --> 00:36:57,005
Let's do Q2 neuro checks
and an MRI in the morning.
734
00:36:57,006 --> 00:36:58,216
Mm-hmm?
735
00:37:02,470 --> 00:37:04,138
Maybe I should be a neurosurgeon.
736
00:37:05,014 --> 00:37:07,141
Yeah, um, about that.
737
00:37:07,808 --> 00:37:09,101
I got some bad news.
738
00:37:10,853 --> 00:37:12,437
Third year of med school
is gonna break you.
739
00:37:12,438 --> 00:37:14,899
[laughing] Bring it.
740
00:37:28,204 --> 00:37:29,497
How's he doing?
741
00:37:31,290 --> 00:37:32,582
He's okay.
742
00:37:32,583 --> 00:37:34,252
Psych's evaluating him now.
743
00:37:38,214 --> 00:37:39,924
What you said up there...
744
00:37:41,634 --> 00:37:43,469
- If you ever want to talk about...
- I don't.
745
00:37:55,606 --> 00:37:56,941
[sighs]
746
00:37:58,901 --> 00:37:59,986
[sighs]
747
00:38:04,031 --> 00:38:06,908
You being quiet is very unsettling.
748
00:38:06,909 --> 00:38:09,620
Typical night shift or something specific?
749
00:38:11,122 --> 00:38:13,165
Taryn, uh, betrayed me.
750
00:38:13,916 --> 00:38:14,916
Helm cheated on you?
751
00:38:14,917 --> 00:38:17,962
She blocked me
from getting a really good case.
752
00:38:19,088 --> 00:38:21,215
That is... That is so much worse.
753
00:38:21,841 --> 00:38:23,049
Yeah.
754
00:38:23,050 --> 00:38:24,759
I haven't talked to her yet.
755
00:38:24,760 --> 00:38:28,680
I am trying to stay calm.
756
00:38:28,681 --> 00:38:30,850
- But I just...
- Can you give me your hand.
757
00:38:32,768 --> 00:38:34,353
- [sighs] Why?
- Just give it to me.
758
00:38:35,521 --> 00:38:36,564
[Yasuda scoffs]
759
00:38:37,648 --> 00:38:38,648
[Millin] Okay.
760
00:38:38,649 --> 00:38:39,733
[inhales deeply]
761
00:38:39,734 --> 00:38:42,153
- [inhales sharply]
- [inhales deeply]
762
00:38:42,695 --> 00:38:44,864
- [exhales deeply]
- [exhales]
763
00:38:46,198 --> 00:38:47,366
It's acupressure.
764
00:38:47,950 --> 00:38:51,119
My mom used to do it for me
when I was stressed,
765
00:38:51,120 --> 00:38:55,498
and it's like one of only three things
she ever did that actually helped me.
766
00:38:55,499 --> 00:38:59,753
[Grey] Much like the cells in our body,
humans often isolate to avoid harm.
767
00:38:59,754 --> 00:39:01,212
What were the other two?
768
00:39:01,213 --> 00:39:05,134
I can't think of them right now,
but I'm sure they exist.
769
00:39:06,344 --> 00:39:07,345
Somewhere.
770
00:39:08,054 --> 00:39:12,141
[Grey] The truth is, no single
part of the body can thrive on its own.
771
00:39:12,725 --> 00:39:15,060
Your organs work together as a system.
772
00:39:15,061 --> 00:39:17,646
They'll compensate for each other
when one gets weak.
773
00:39:18,564 --> 00:39:21,024
- Hey. How're you doing?
- Hey.
774
00:39:21,025 --> 00:39:23,902
Maggie told me that the divorce papers
are coming in today.
775
00:39:23,903 --> 00:39:25,695
Hey, Sophia is doing well.
776
00:39:25,696 --> 00:39:28,365
I haven't had a rush
like that in a long time.
777
00:39:28,366 --> 00:39:31,159
- We should do that more often.
- You mean more tragedy?
778
00:39:31,160 --> 00:39:33,620
I don't get trauma surgeons.
779
00:39:33,621 --> 00:39:36,248
Hey. Morning. Are you exhausted?
780
00:39:36,916 --> 00:39:38,042
Strangely, no.
781
00:39:38,959 --> 00:39:40,877
Chief, you're on the schedule tomorrow.
782
00:39:40,878 --> 00:39:42,962
TAVR. I emailed you the case.
783
00:39:42,963 --> 00:39:44,756
- I'm cleared?
- You're cleared. [sighs]
784
00:39:44,757 --> 00:39:46,591
And I need some time off.
785
00:39:46,592 --> 00:39:48,176
- Right.
- Congratulations.
786
00:39:48,177 --> 00:39:49,344
Thank you.
787
00:39:49,345 --> 00:39:51,346
All right. I'm gonna go check my emails.
788
00:39:51,347 --> 00:39:54,140
Oh, I left the laundry in the washer
and Leo's at a playdate,
789
00:39:54,141 --> 00:39:56,226
but your mom's car is acting up,
so you need to pick him up.
790
00:39:56,227 --> 00:39:57,311
Copy that.
791
00:39:58,020 --> 00:39:59,646
[sighs] Back down to earth.
792
00:39:59,647 --> 00:40:01,523
[Grey] People can do the same
for each other.
793
00:40:01,524 --> 00:40:03,441
Stepping up when someone else is down.
794
00:40:03,442 --> 00:40:04,693
You waited for me.
795
00:40:06,028 --> 00:40:08,114
After that night?
[scoffs] Of course I did.
796
00:40:08,989 --> 00:40:10,199
Come on.
797
00:40:10,699 --> 00:40:14,286
There was a girl in my med school
that took her own life.
798
00:40:14,954 --> 00:40:18,540
I didn't know her well,
but she was top of our class.
799
00:40:18,541 --> 00:40:20,835
Like, a real overachiever.
800
00:40:21,502 --> 00:40:25,588
Isn't that what medical schools want?
Overachievers and perfectionists?
801
00:40:25,589 --> 00:40:30,510
Yeah, put them in a pressure cooker
and add unrealistic expectations.
802
00:40:30,511 --> 00:40:32,638
That's a recipe for mental illness.
803
00:40:33,180 --> 00:40:35,433
Especially if you're already struggling.
804
00:40:36,559 --> 00:40:38,978
It's a good thing your residents
have you looking out for them.
805
00:40:40,146 --> 00:40:42,940
It's a good thing
I have you looking out for me.
806
00:40:43,607 --> 00:40:44,859
[Warren chuckles]
807
00:40:46,026 --> 00:40:49,488
[Grey] Isolating ourselves
often makes us feel more alone.
808
00:40:59,039 --> 00:41:00,499
- Hey.
- Hey.
809
00:41:04,128 --> 00:41:05,671
Can we talk?
810
00:41:07,047 --> 00:41:10,341
- I just had... I had a really long night.
- Right.
811
00:41:10,342 --> 00:41:13,471
I'll... I'll go.
812
00:41:14,054 --> 00:41:15,598
Wait.
813
00:41:17,266 --> 00:41:22,562
♪ Enough ♪
814
00:41:22,563 --> 00:41:25,648
♪ Oh, yeah
Oh, yeah ♪
815
00:41:25,649 --> 00:41:28,860
- ♪ Enough, enough ♪
- ♪ Will we change? Will we change? ♪
816
00:41:28,861 --> 00:41:31,154
- ♪ Enough ♪
- ♪ Will we change? ♪
817
00:41:31,155 --> 00:41:33,281
♪ Enough ♪
818
00:41:33,282 --> 00:41:35,700
- ♪ Will we change? ♪
- ♪ Oh, yeah, yeah ♪
819
00:41:35,701 --> 00:41:37,745
♪ Enough ♪
820
00:41:39,121 --> 00:41:41,414
♪ When I got the call from you ♪
821
00:41:41,415 --> 00:41:43,708
♪ It was a shot to my heart ♪
822
00:41:43,709 --> 00:41:44,792
[Griffith sighs]
823
00:41:44,793 --> 00:41:46,587
[Grey] We're usually better together.
824
00:41:47,087 --> 00:41:48,463
Even when we're struggling.
825
00:41:48,464 --> 00:41:50,715
♪ Am I doin' my part? ♪
826
00:41:50,716 --> 00:41:51,800
[song ends]
827
00:41:56,263 --> 00:41:57,389
You are not alone.
828
00:41:58,307 --> 00:42:01,894
If you or someone you know
is in crisis or needs support,
829
00:42:02,686 --> 00:42:04,772
there are resources that can help you.
830
00:42:05,648 --> 00:42:08,608
{\an8}Call or text 988.
831
00:42:08,609 --> 00:42:14,489
{\an8}Or visit www.988lifeline.org
832
00:42:14,490 --> 00:42:16,534
{\an8}for the suicide and crisis lifeline.
833
00:42:17,368 --> 00:42:21,872
{\an8}For worldwide help visit
findahelpline.org.
60485
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