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Previously on "Reginald the Vampire"...
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She gives me blood.
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She gives me kisses.
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00:00:05,700 --> 00:00:08,051
Put them together,
the perfect woman.
5
00:00:08,138 --> 00:00:10,096
Abraham was
a vampire of legend.
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He could turn a vampire
back to human.
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00:00:12,664 --> 00:00:15,362
We found Abraham
in Spokane, Washington.
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It's not
what it looks like!
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00:00:17,190 --> 00:00:18,452
I can explain!
10
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You know what you are?
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You're a disease.
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00:00:20,541 --> 00:00:22,413
I killed Todd.
13
00:00:22,500 --> 00:00:25,938
I'm a liar, an asshole,
and a murderer.
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00:00:27,940 --> 00:00:31,509
♪ Sail on, brother ♪
15
00:00:31,596 --> 00:00:35,078
♪ Don't let go ♪
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Hey, friend.
17
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Buy a fellow traveler a drink?
18
00:00:40,779 --> 00:00:43,825
How do you know
I'm not from around here?
19
00:00:43,912 --> 00:00:47,177
You got the look of a man
who left home in the rearview.
20
00:00:47,264 --> 00:00:50,354
Billy.
21
00:00:50,441 --> 00:00:52,921
Reginald.
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That drink?
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♪ Hang on, brother ♪
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♪ Don't lose your way ♪
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I'm about two weeks left
from broke.
26
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Ah, plenty there
to wet our whistles.
27
00:01:08,372 --> 00:01:12,463
Two pints of your finest
bottom-shelf brew.
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00:01:12,550 --> 00:01:15,509
So...
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00:01:15,596 --> 00:01:19,252
What's your story, Reginald?
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00:01:19,339 --> 00:01:20,993
I don't really know anymore.
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00:01:25,040 --> 00:01:28,348
Well,
cheers to not knowing.
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In fact,
every man's life comes down
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to that one pivotal moment,
like that crossroads
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with your name on it.
35
00:01:41,709 --> 00:01:45,017
Well...
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I think this is one
of those crossroad moments.
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00:01:47,585 --> 00:01:48,847
Do you?
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00:01:48,934 --> 00:01:50,283
I'm offering you
the opportunity
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00:01:50,370 --> 00:01:52,285
to change the trajectory
of your life.
40
00:01:52,372 --> 00:01:54,461
How's that?
41
00:01:59,249 --> 00:02:00,685
You play poker?
42
00:02:06,604 --> 00:02:09,520
Go on, then.
43
00:02:09,607 --> 00:02:11,391
I'm easy.
44
00:02:11,478 --> 00:02:12,697
Raise another 20.
45
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Call.
46
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Full------- house.
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Good hand.
48
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Not good enough.
49
00:02:31,846 --> 00:02:33,413
Straight flush.
50
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Hell no!
51
00:02:35,241 --> 00:02:37,374
That ain't right!
- The river don't lie.
52
00:02:37,461 --> 00:02:38,984
Yeah, you're just
some kind of card shark.
53
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Been playing me from the jump.
54
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The hell you think
you're going?
55
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I'm just a little farther
from broke than I was before.
56
00:02:46,905 --> 00:02:49,299
And I got enough money
to buy everybody a beer.
57
00:02:49,386 --> 00:02:51,953
- Okay.
- All right.
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00:02:52,040 --> 00:02:54,913
Y'all just gonna let him
walk away, this clown?
59
00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:57,568
After he cheated us
out of our money?
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00:02:57,655 --> 00:03:00,005
Billy,
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00:03:00,092 --> 00:03:02,442
I don't like
being called a cheater.
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00:03:02,529 --> 00:03:03,878
I don't like
being called a clown.
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Give me back my money.
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00:03:05,445 --> 00:03:06,794
Crossroads.
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00:03:06,881 --> 00:03:08,100
That's what you said.
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You took a look into my wallet,
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00:03:09,841 --> 00:03:11,582
you saw an opportunity,
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00:03:11,669 --> 00:03:13,845
but it didn't turn out
the way you planned because--
69
00:03:13,932 --> 00:03:16,587
and this is really funny
when you think about it--
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00:03:16,674 --> 00:03:18,893
the crossroads weren't for me.
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00:03:18,980 --> 00:03:20,330
They were for you.
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00:03:20,417 --> 00:03:22,593
Give me back
my goddamn money,
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00:03:22,680 --> 00:03:24,247
or you'll pay me another way.
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00:03:24,334 --> 00:03:26,118
Ah, I can't do that.
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00:03:26,205 --> 00:03:27,511
I finally have enough cash
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00:03:27,598 --> 00:03:28,903
to keep myself going
a little longer.
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The only thing
you're gonna do
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is die where you're standing.
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00:03:34,605 --> 00:03:37,172
The thing is, I can't die.
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00:03:37,260 --> 00:03:38,217
It's impossible.
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00:03:38,304 --> 00:03:39,697
You wanna bet?
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00:03:39,784 --> 00:03:41,264
I think we've established
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00:03:41,351 --> 00:03:43,657
that gambling is not
your strongest suit.
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00:03:43,744 --> 00:03:45,877
Get it? Suit, like--
85
00:03:45,964 --> 00:03:46,965
I get what you're saying.
86
00:03:47,052 --> 00:03:48,488
No, you don't.
87
00:03:48,575 --> 00:03:50,882
When I tell you can't die,
88
00:03:50,969 --> 00:03:53,885
I'm not speaking a metaphor.
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00:03:53,972 --> 00:03:58,193
I'm genuinely trying to share
an important fact with you.
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00:03:58,281 --> 00:03:59,760
What the hell would that be?
91
00:03:59,847 --> 00:04:02,285
I'm a mother------- vampire.
92
00:04:04,112 --> 00:04:05,113
Oh, shit!
93
00:04:05,200 --> 00:04:06,767
Go, go, go!
94
00:04:14,035 --> 00:04:17,300
I'll take that beer, vampire,
95
00:04:17,387 --> 00:04:21,652
and a couple of minutes
of your time.
96
00:04:21,739 --> 00:04:23,306
Why?
97
00:04:23,393 --> 00:04:25,264
You're just the man
I've been looking for.
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00:04:27,571 --> 00:04:28,920
I think you have me mistaken
for somebody else.
99
00:04:29,007 --> 00:04:31,705
I'm no one.
100
00:04:31,792 --> 00:04:33,664
I've been watching you.
101
00:04:33,751 --> 00:04:36,188
It seems to me
you're here for some reason.
102
00:04:38,190 --> 00:04:39,496
What do you want from me?
103
00:04:39,583 --> 00:04:41,802
You're looking for something.
104
00:04:41,889 --> 00:04:43,848
I think I can help you
find it--
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00:04:43,935 --> 00:04:47,417
uh, find him.
106
00:04:47,504 --> 00:04:50,594
A friend of mine told me
about a very legendary vampire,
107
00:04:50,681 --> 00:04:53,510
whose powers--
well, let's just say
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00:04:53,597 --> 00:04:56,121
he can do things
other vampires can't.
109
00:04:56,208 --> 00:04:58,602
And I've been
searching for him.
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00:04:58,689 --> 00:05:00,168
His name is Abraham.
111
00:05:00,255 --> 00:05:03,433
And what do you want
from this Abraham?
112
00:05:03,520 --> 00:05:05,130
I want to ask him
an improbable question.
113
00:05:05,217 --> 00:05:06,349
Improbable?
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00:05:06,436 --> 00:05:07,393
Hmm.
115
00:05:07,480 --> 00:05:09,917
I'm intrigued.
116
00:05:10,004 --> 00:05:12,224
Ah, it's personal.
117
00:05:12,311 --> 00:05:14,269
Say no more.
118
00:05:14,357 --> 00:05:16,837
I've been looking for clues,
including any other vampires
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00:05:16,924 --> 00:05:17,969
who could help me.
120
00:05:18,056 --> 00:05:20,363
But you're not a vampire.
121
00:05:20,450 --> 00:05:23,670
I'm just Jenkins.
122
00:05:23,757 --> 00:05:26,978
But I know
the vampire that you seek.
123
00:05:27,065 --> 00:05:29,110
I've been seeking him too.
124
00:05:29,197 --> 00:05:30,634
Really?
125
00:05:30,721 --> 00:05:32,026
For what?
126
00:05:34,289 --> 00:05:35,203
It's personal.
127
00:05:35,290 --> 00:05:37,554
Say no more.
128
00:05:39,338 --> 00:05:41,862
Maybe between the two of us,
we could find him.
129
00:05:41,949 --> 00:05:44,865
Oh, I already know
where Abraham is.
130
00:05:44,952 --> 00:05:46,258
You just said
you were seeking him.
131
00:05:46,345 --> 00:05:47,781
I'm pretty sure
you said "seeking."
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00:05:47,868 --> 00:05:51,394
I know where he resides.
133
00:05:51,481 --> 00:05:54,484
The fact is,
I can't go in there alone.
134
00:05:54,571 --> 00:05:57,530
I'm not strong enough.
135
00:05:57,617 --> 00:06:00,925
Everyone who has gone
into that place
136
00:06:01,012 --> 00:06:02,753
has never come out.
137
00:06:02,840 --> 00:06:04,363
I get it.
138
00:06:04,450 --> 00:06:06,234
Only a vampire can get
to another vampire.
139
00:06:06,321 --> 00:06:09,803
You wouldn't be the first.
140
00:06:09,890 --> 00:06:13,328
Many vampires have
sought him out,
141
00:06:13,416 --> 00:06:16,201
and every one has failed.
142
00:06:16,288 --> 00:06:18,159
Then why me?
143
00:06:18,246 --> 00:06:20,335
I need a hero.
144
00:06:20,423 --> 00:06:23,469
Okay, I'm no hero.
145
00:06:23,556 --> 00:06:25,602
Oh, yes, you are.
I'm sure of it.
146
00:06:25,689 --> 00:06:30,302
Look, "just Jenkins,"
I let down,
147
00:06:30,389 --> 00:06:34,045
disappointed, betrayed,
deceived, and hurt
148
00:06:34,132 --> 00:06:36,613
anyone who's ever meant
anything to me.
149
00:06:36,700 --> 00:06:38,789
And as soon as I was finished
laying ruin to my life,
150
00:06:38,876 --> 00:06:40,443
I ran away.
151
00:06:40,530 --> 00:06:43,620
So trust me when I say this--
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00:06:43,707 --> 00:06:46,623
I'm no hero.
153
00:06:46,710 --> 00:06:48,102
Let's go, Reginald.
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00:06:48,189 --> 00:06:49,800
Time's a'wasting.
155
00:06:49,887 --> 00:06:53,673
Did you not hear
a single word I just said?
156
00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:55,501
Come with me,
157
00:06:55,588 --> 00:06:58,591
and I will help you get
what you want.
158
00:07:08,775 --> 00:07:11,561
If I were
a vampire of legend,
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00:07:11,648 --> 00:07:16,043
this is exactly the not place
I would not live.
160
00:07:16,130 --> 00:07:18,959
Tell me, what is it
you're looking for, Reginald?
161
00:07:19,046 --> 00:07:22,136
What is
the improbable question?
162
00:07:22,223 --> 00:07:23,137
Salvation.
163
00:07:23,224 --> 00:07:26,358
Oh, big ask.
164
00:07:26,445 --> 00:07:28,099
It feels like
it's my only chance.
165
00:07:28,186 --> 00:07:30,231
It's my only chance too.
166
00:07:30,318 --> 00:07:31,624
For what?
167
00:07:31,711 --> 00:07:34,105
A new heart.
168
00:07:34,192 --> 00:07:37,500
My current ticker
has a shelf life.
169
00:07:37,587 --> 00:07:40,546
Big ask.
170
00:07:40,633 --> 00:07:44,158
All right, Tin Woodsman,
let's do this thing.
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00:07:48,989 --> 00:07:50,904
Whoa. What the--
172
00:08:01,088 --> 00:08:02,307
Are you seeing
what I'm seeing?
173
00:08:02,394 --> 00:08:04,004
Yes,
174
00:08:04,091 --> 00:08:07,660
assuming seeing is believing.
175
00:08:07,747 --> 00:08:09,096
This is it.
176
00:08:09,183 --> 00:08:10,794
This is the place.
It has to be.
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00:08:10,881 --> 00:08:12,447
Agreed.
178
00:08:12,535 --> 00:08:13,927
Although I do think
179
00:08:14,014 --> 00:08:17,409
that you are
a tad underdressed.
180
00:08:24,503 --> 00:08:26,723
There's no doors.
181
00:08:26,810 --> 00:08:29,029
No elevator.
182
00:08:29,116 --> 00:08:31,249
No stairs.
183
00:08:31,336 --> 00:08:35,340
No way out,
except the way we came in.
184
00:08:35,427 --> 00:08:37,168
I'm not leaving
until we find Abraham.
185
00:08:37,255 --> 00:08:40,432
Of course,
the improbable question.
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00:08:41,912 --> 00:08:44,088
Hello.
187
00:08:44,175 --> 00:08:45,742
Welcome to the party.
188
00:08:45,829 --> 00:08:46,873
Who are you?
189
00:08:46,960 --> 00:08:48,875
I'm Reginald.
190
00:08:48,962 --> 00:08:52,444
Tell me, what is
this question of yours?
191
00:08:55,316 --> 00:08:57,797
My life is not the life
I'm supposed to be living.
192
00:08:59,625 --> 00:09:00,670
I need to go back.
193
00:09:00,757 --> 00:09:03,586
Back to where?
194
00:09:03,673 --> 00:09:05,413
According to legend,
195
00:09:05,500 --> 00:09:07,459
there's something
only Abraham can do.
196
00:09:07,546 --> 00:09:10,549
Oh? What's that?
197
00:09:10,636 --> 00:09:11,898
He can make me human again.
198
00:09:15,032 --> 00:09:17,991
That's a very big ask.
199
00:09:18,078 --> 00:09:19,558
You want a heart.
200
00:09:19,645 --> 00:09:21,952
Yes, one organ.
201
00:09:22,039 --> 00:09:23,518
Well, I have to try.
202
00:09:23,606 --> 00:09:26,260
What's so great
about being human?
203
00:09:26,347 --> 00:09:28,219
First, you're born.
204
00:09:28,306 --> 00:09:31,135
And then begins
the march towards death.
205
00:09:31,222 --> 00:09:32,527
I should know.
206
00:09:32,615 --> 00:09:34,747
But is that so bad, though?
207
00:09:34,834 --> 00:09:37,228
To have a finite amount of time
to live your best life?
208
00:09:37,315 --> 00:09:38,708
I was better
being human anyway.
209
00:09:38,795 --> 00:09:40,927
Are you sure about that?
210
00:09:41,014 --> 00:09:43,016
I don't know.
211
00:09:43,103 --> 00:09:45,236
At least I had practice.
212
00:09:45,323 --> 00:09:48,456
But with practice,
213
00:09:48,543 --> 00:09:51,721
won't you become
a better vampire?
214
00:09:51,808 --> 00:09:54,941
With everything I've done,
I'm thinking not.
215
00:10:11,566 --> 00:10:13,656
We didn't order these.
216
00:10:13,743 --> 00:10:15,266
First drinks are always
on the house, gentlemen.
217
00:10:15,353 --> 00:10:18,443
Well, isn't that cordial?
218
00:10:18,530 --> 00:10:19,749
What can I do you for?
219
00:10:19,836 --> 00:10:21,098
We're looking for someone.
220
00:10:21,185 --> 00:10:22,360
Perhaps in this crowd?
221
00:10:22,447 --> 00:10:23,535
Someone else.
222
00:10:23,622 --> 00:10:24,841
He goes by the name of Abraham.
223
00:10:24,928 --> 00:10:28,453
Of course, our famous tenant.
224
00:10:28,540 --> 00:10:30,585
He's--he's here?
225
00:10:30,673 --> 00:10:32,675
Abraham once lived
in the penthouse.
226
00:10:32,762 --> 00:10:35,242
Lived, or lives?
227
00:10:35,329 --> 00:10:37,070
He inspired many a legend.
228
00:10:37,157 --> 00:10:40,030
Really? Enlighten us.
229
00:10:40,117 --> 00:10:42,859
Oh, there are
so many to choose from.
230
00:10:42,946 --> 00:10:46,036
But I think it best
I stick with a classic.
231
00:10:46,123 --> 00:10:49,648
Once upon a time,
a powerful creature ruled
232
00:10:49,735 --> 00:10:51,998
over the kingdom of his kind.
233
00:10:52,085 --> 00:10:54,348
He was a fair
and gracious leader,
234
00:10:54,435 --> 00:10:56,611
loved by all.
235
00:10:56,699 --> 00:10:59,919
But there were some
who wanted to take his power
236
00:11:00,006 --> 00:11:03,531
and use it to satisfy
their own desires.
237
00:11:03,618 --> 00:11:05,185
There was a man--
238
00:11:05,272 --> 00:11:07,013
no longer a man--
239
00:11:07,100 --> 00:11:09,450
who challenged him.
240
00:11:09,537 --> 00:11:10,625
I know this part.
241
00:11:10,713 --> 00:11:12,018
Logan the Putrescent,
242
00:11:12,105 --> 00:11:14,194
the head
of the Vampire Council.
243
00:11:14,281 --> 00:11:17,197
He hired assassins
to murder Abraham.
244
00:11:17,284 --> 00:11:19,809
Killer after killer
came through these doors.
245
00:11:19,896 --> 00:11:23,073
The attacks on Abraham
were relentless.
246
00:11:23,160 --> 00:11:25,902
The best assassins
that money could buy.
247
00:11:25,989 --> 00:11:27,338
Nikki.
248
00:11:27,425 --> 00:11:29,427
Nikki was impressive.
249
00:11:29,514 --> 00:11:31,429
She never made it upstairs.
250
00:11:31,516 --> 00:11:33,866
I quite liked her. Pity.
251
00:11:33,953 --> 00:11:36,695
Nobody got out alive,
except Nikki.
252
00:11:36,782 --> 00:11:38,523
She had a partner,
didn't she?
253
00:11:38,610 --> 00:11:40,090
Hard to keep track.
254
00:11:40,177 --> 00:11:42,832
He had a patch of white hair.
255
00:11:42,919 --> 00:11:44,703
Now that you mention it,
that does ring a bell.
256
00:11:44,790 --> 00:11:46,096
So what about
the rest of the story?
257
00:11:46,183 --> 00:11:47,532
What about Abraham?
Is he alive?
258
00:11:47,619 --> 00:11:49,186
Perhaps.
259
00:11:49,273 --> 00:11:51,144
Not quite.
260
00:11:51,231 --> 00:11:52,450
Maybe.
261
00:11:52,537 --> 00:11:55,453
Quite possibly.
262
00:11:55,540 --> 00:11:58,369
I hope so.
263
00:11:58,456 --> 00:12:00,588
Well, now I'm
completely confused.
264
00:12:05,115 --> 00:12:06,725
It's you!
265
00:12:06,812 --> 00:12:08,945
It's him.
266
00:12:09,032 --> 00:12:10,163
You're Stanley.
267
00:12:10,250 --> 00:12:11,425
Who's Stanley?
268
00:12:11,512 --> 00:12:14,602
Nikki's partner.
269
00:12:14,689 --> 00:12:15,821
Man.
270
00:12:18,519 --> 00:12:20,565
Hey, dude.
271
00:12:23,046 --> 00:12:24,482
Was that elevator always there?
272
00:12:24,569 --> 00:12:26,136
Maybe it's magic.
273
00:12:26,223 --> 00:12:27,746
A magical conveyance?
274
00:12:27,833 --> 00:12:30,314
Ha!
275
00:12:30,401 --> 00:12:32,272
Did you see that?
276
00:12:32,359 --> 00:12:36,581
I may be wrong
about its supernatural aspects.
277
00:12:41,368 --> 00:12:44,807
We need to get
into that elevator.
278
00:12:44,894 --> 00:12:46,547
Hurry, Jenkins.
279
00:12:46,634 --> 00:12:47,940
That elevator's the only way
to get to the penthouse.
280
00:12:48,027 --> 00:12:49,594
Yeah, we'll get there,
all right.
281
00:12:49,681 --> 00:12:50,682
Okay, but if it can
appear out of nowhere,
282
00:12:50,769 --> 00:12:51,726
it can disappear just as quick.
283
00:12:51,814 --> 00:12:53,119
Let's go.
284
00:12:53,206 --> 00:12:54,817
It's this damn
weak ticker of mine.
285
00:12:54,904 --> 00:12:57,776
Okay, let me help you.
286
00:12:57,863 --> 00:12:59,604
Sorry?
- See you next time.
287
00:12:59,691 --> 00:13:00,692
Sure, I guess.
288
00:13:00,779 --> 00:13:02,433
Come again soon.
289
00:13:02,520 --> 00:13:04,217
Did you hear that?
Is that weird?
290
00:13:04,304 --> 00:13:05,784
I think this party has
taken a turn.
291
00:13:05,871 --> 00:13:07,525
Time for you to go.
292
00:13:07,612 --> 00:13:09,832
Okay, seriously can't get
out of here fast enough.
293
00:13:11,224 --> 00:13:12,486
No buttons?
294
00:13:12,573 --> 00:13:14,924
How inconvenient.
295
00:13:15,011 --> 00:13:17,013
- But there has to be a button!
- Nothing.
296
00:13:17,100 --> 00:13:18,710
Wait.
297
00:13:18,797 --> 00:13:20,190
I got this.
298
00:13:27,066 --> 00:13:28,111
Maybe not.
299
00:13:28,198 --> 00:13:29,852
In my experience,
300
00:13:29,939 --> 00:13:33,116
doors are best walked through
when open.
301
00:13:33,203 --> 00:13:34,813
It's a magic elevator.
302
00:13:34,900 --> 00:13:36,597
The usual law of physics
don't usually apply here.
303
00:13:39,035 --> 00:13:40,601
Hold on.
304
00:13:40,688 --> 00:13:42,516
What is it?
305
00:13:42,603 --> 00:13:44,214
The music.
306
00:13:44,301 --> 00:13:45,519
It's different.
307
00:13:48,696 --> 00:13:50,046
Uh, I think we made them angry.
308
00:13:50,133 --> 00:13:51,656
How so?
309
00:13:51,743 --> 00:13:54,311
No idea, but it looks
like the party's over.
310
00:13:54,398 --> 00:13:57,270
Thoughts? Plots? Plans?
311
00:13:57,357 --> 00:13:59,272
I'm open to suggestion.
312
00:13:59,359 --> 00:14:01,318
Unbelievable.
I get it now.
313
00:14:01,405 --> 00:14:03,668
This is--this actually makes
a lot of sense.
314
00:14:03,755 --> 00:14:05,670
- It does? How?
- Basic cytology.
315
00:14:05,757 --> 00:14:07,411
Come again?
316
00:14:07,498 --> 00:14:09,761
It's the analysis
of single cells in the body.
317
00:14:09,848 --> 00:14:11,937
Ever since we walked in here,
all these people,
318
00:14:12,024 --> 00:14:15,288
or whatever they are, have been
making comments about us.
319
00:14:15,375 --> 00:14:17,551
Who are we? What do we want?
320
00:14:17,638 --> 00:14:19,075
And now they want us out.
321
00:14:19,162 --> 00:14:21,033
Yeah, well,
that much is clear.
322
00:14:21,120 --> 00:14:22,513
They're like
white blood cells,
323
00:14:22,600 --> 00:14:24,036
and white blood cells
kill viruses.
324
00:14:24,123 --> 00:14:25,429
Well,
that's a good thing, huh?
325
00:14:25,516 --> 00:14:27,213
- Not exactly.
- Because?
326
00:14:27,300 --> 00:14:29,607
We're the virus.
327
00:14:29,694 --> 00:14:32,523
Leave this to me.
328
00:14:32,610 --> 00:14:34,829
This is supposed to be a party.
329
00:14:34,917 --> 00:14:37,006
Let's dance.
330
00:14:37,093 --> 00:14:39,617
Uh, maybe I could
tell you a joke.
331
00:14:39,704 --> 00:14:41,445
I have millions of them.
332
00:14:41,532 --> 00:14:44,143
I--tough crowd.
333
00:14:44,230 --> 00:14:46,145
How are you doing?
- Not good!
334
00:14:46,232 --> 00:14:47,668
Keep trying to distract them.
335
00:14:47,755 --> 00:14:49,844
Try to get them out of sync!
- Will do.
336
00:14:49,932 --> 00:14:51,672
Look, I must apologize
for this.
337
00:14:51,759 --> 00:14:55,241
I abhor violence of any kind.
338
00:14:55,328 --> 00:14:56,590
But--
339
00:14:56,677 --> 00:14:58,679
ah! No!
340
00:14:58,766 --> 00:15:00,072
Jenkins!
341
00:15:00,159 --> 00:15:01,856
I'm afraid
I can't break free.
342
00:15:01,944 --> 00:15:04,468
I say! No!
343
00:15:04,555 --> 00:15:06,992
Save yourself, Reginald.
I'm not worth it.
344
00:15:07,079 --> 00:15:09,212
You must go on without me.
345
00:15:09,299 --> 00:15:12,563
No! No! I won't. I can't!
346
00:15:12,650 --> 00:15:13,781
Listen to me!
347
00:15:13,868 --> 00:15:15,479
You have the wrong guy!
348
00:15:15,566 --> 00:15:16,610
I'm the virus!
349
00:15:16,697 --> 00:15:18,830
I am the disease!
350
00:15:18,917 --> 00:15:20,919
I don't deserve to ask
a legendary vampire
351
00:15:21,006 --> 00:15:22,355
for some favor.
352
00:15:22,442 --> 00:15:24,575
Let Jenkins go
and find his heart.
353
00:15:24,662 --> 00:15:25,968
Take me instead!
354
00:15:26,055 --> 00:15:28,318
Please, take me!
355
00:15:32,235 --> 00:15:33,976
Somebody say something!
356
00:15:34,063 --> 00:15:35,760
I'm kind of at the end
of my rope here.
357
00:15:39,807 --> 00:15:40,939
Whoa.
- Whoo-hoo!
358
00:15:41,026 --> 00:15:42,897
What? Wait, what?
359
00:15:47,206 --> 00:15:50,644
I knew it!
360
00:15:50,731 --> 00:15:54,953
Reginald, you have no idea
how long I have waited
361
00:15:55,040 --> 00:15:57,608
for a heart as pure as yours.
362
00:15:57,695 --> 00:16:01,003
No, I told you,
you got the wrong guy.
363
00:16:01,090 --> 00:16:02,395
I'm just some jerk-off
364
00:16:02,482 --> 00:16:03,962
who's afraid
of his own failures
365
00:16:04,049 --> 00:16:05,398
and blames everything
on everyone else.
366
00:16:05,485 --> 00:16:07,357
Time to go, Reginald.
367
00:16:07,444 --> 00:16:09,837
Your journey is just beginning.
368
00:16:09,924 --> 00:16:12,492
Find me. Save me.
369
00:16:12,579 --> 00:16:15,234
Be my hero.
370
00:16:35,950 --> 00:16:37,343
Oh, hey!
371
00:16:37,430 --> 00:16:39,824
You're still here.
372
00:16:39,911 --> 00:16:44,046
Not that I know
how "here" works.
373
00:16:45,960 --> 00:16:49,921
I'm friends with--
or was friends
374
00:16:50,008 --> 00:16:51,618
with your partner--Nikki?
375
00:16:54,534 --> 00:16:55,579
I'm Reginald.
376
00:17:09,767 --> 00:17:12,422
Okay!
377
00:17:12,509 --> 00:17:15,599
So you're a ghost--
378
00:17:15,686 --> 00:17:18,036
or premonition?
379
00:17:18,123 --> 00:17:19,559
Yeah.
380
00:17:19,646 --> 00:17:21,909
I used to be human,
381
00:17:21,996 --> 00:17:24,129
and I'm hoping
to become human again.
382
00:17:26,392 --> 00:17:30,701
So, Stanley,
about your mission,
383
00:17:30,788 --> 00:17:33,182
I think...
384
00:17:33,269 --> 00:17:35,880
it would be worth reconsidering.
385
00:17:35,967 --> 00:17:37,186
And yes, if you're wondering,
386
00:17:37,273 --> 00:17:38,404
I do have
a personal interest in--
387
00:17:44,845 --> 00:17:46,064
Hang tight.
388
00:17:46,151 --> 00:17:47,718
This is my floor.
389
00:18:03,647 --> 00:18:06,215
Welcome to Slushy Shack.
How may I help you?
390
00:18:09,392 --> 00:18:10,915
You're alive!
391
00:18:11,002 --> 00:18:12,308
Am I?
392
00:18:12,395 --> 00:18:13,613
Well, that's good.
393
00:18:13,700 --> 00:18:15,006
It's Frazzleberry Friday.
394
00:18:15,093 --> 00:18:18,575
Todd, it's me, Reginald.
395
00:18:18,662 --> 00:18:21,055
You know, I mop and I mop,
396
00:18:21,143 --> 00:18:23,928
but this puddle,
it just won't go away.
397
00:18:24,015 --> 00:18:26,278
I did that.
398
00:18:26,365 --> 00:18:27,627
Why?
399
00:18:27,714 --> 00:18:29,629
I was upset.
400
00:18:29,716 --> 00:18:31,588
And you were hungry.
401
00:18:31,675 --> 00:18:32,893
You took me for granted.
402
00:18:32,980 --> 00:18:34,547
I'm sorry.
403
00:18:34,634 --> 00:18:35,853
I was your friend.
404
00:18:35,940 --> 00:18:37,594
Team Reggie.
405
00:18:37,681 --> 00:18:39,073
And you made me your meal plan.
406
00:18:39,161 --> 00:18:40,640
We can start over.
407
00:18:40,727 --> 00:18:42,120
Can we?
408
00:18:42,207 --> 00:18:44,427
Regi-round?
409
00:18:45,906 --> 00:18:47,952
We weren't really friends,
were we?
410
00:18:48,039 --> 00:18:50,041
Not really, anyway.
411
00:18:50,128 --> 00:18:52,522
I glamoured you to like me.
412
00:18:52,609 --> 00:18:53,958
That makes this okay?
413
00:18:54,045 --> 00:18:56,830
No. No.
414
00:18:56,917 --> 00:18:59,964
You've always been
a hungry boy, haven't you?
415
00:19:00,051 --> 00:19:02,532
Good time for a fat joke.
416
00:19:02,619 --> 00:19:04,534
Let's get real.
417
00:19:04,621 --> 00:19:07,624
Yes, you're a glutton.
418
00:19:07,711 --> 00:19:10,627
You're a glutton
for punishment.
419
00:19:10,714 --> 00:19:12,890
You make a huge mess,
and then you wallow in it,
420
00:19:12,977 --> 00:19:15,675
begging for forgiveness,
because, "Oh, deep down,
421
00:19:15,762 --> 00:19:17,155
I really am a nice guy."
422
00:19:17,242 --> 00:19:19,505
Oh, boo------- hoo!
423
00:19:19,592 --> 00:19:23,030
I almost forgot
what a jerk you could be.
424
00:19:23,117 --> 00:19:24,989
How you made me feel
about myself.
425
00:19:25,076 --> 00:19:26,904
Well, at least I own it.
426
00:19:26,991 --> 00:19:28,906
I don't mope around pretending
to be one of the good guys.
427
00:19:28,993 --> 00:19:29,950
You're a bully!
428
00:19:30,037 --> 00:19:31,213
You're a murderer.
429
00:19:33,606 --> 00:19:36,305
You win.
430
00:19:36,392 --> 00:19:38,350
Fine!
431
00:19:38,437 --> 00:19:39,525
You're right.
432
00:19:39,612 --> 00:19:41,962
Is that what you want to hear?
433
00:19:42,049 --> 00:19:46,097
I thought I was one
of the good guys, but I'm not.
434
00:19:46,184 --> 00:19:48,055
I lose control and I---- up
435
00:19:48,142 --> 00:19:51,798
and I hate myself for it.
436
00:19:51,885 --> 00:19:53,670
So you're right.
437
00:19:53,757 --> 00:19:58,152
I, Reginald Andres,
am a bad guy.
438
00:19:58,240 --> 00:19:59,415
Bingo.
439
00:20:07,771 --> 00:20:09,468
Weirder and weirder.
440
00:20:09,555 --> 00:20:11,078
"What's the Story,
Morning Glory?"
441
00:20:11,165 --> 00:20:12,950
"Bored in the USA."
442
00:20:13,037 --> 00:20:15,561
Ooh, "Bad Together."
443
00:20:15,648 --> 00:20:17,389
I gotta find out
what happened to me.
444
00:20:22,264 --> 00:20:24,396
Sarah?
445
00:20:26,093 --> 00:20:28,095
Sarah?
446
00:20:28,182 --> 00:20:30,533
Is it okay if I sit down?
447
00:20:30,620 --> 00:20:33,231
Okay, I guess
I'll just sit then.
448
00:20:36,539 --> 00:20:37,801
You lied to me.
449
00:20:37,888 --> 00:20:39,629
I--I didn't.
450
00:20:39,716 --> 00:20:41,021
You said, "Listen to me."
451
00:20:41,108 --> 00:20:42,806
Okay, I might have said that.
452
00:20:42,893 --> 00:20:46,679
You told me to forget
what I saw, to forget Nikki,
453
00:20:46,766 --> 00:20:48,899
to forget everything
up until the next time we met,
454
00:20:48,986 --> 00:20:50,683
and then it would all be fine.
455
00:20:50,770 --> 00:20:51,945
I had to.
456
00:20:52,032 --> 00:20:53,295
You didn't.
457
00:20:53,382 --> 00:20:57,429
You were so angry, so hurt.
458
00:20:57,516 --> 00:21:00,040
I couldn't stand it.
I had no choice!
459
00:21:00,127 --> 00:21:02,260
You could have told me
the truth.
460
00:21:02,347 --> 00:21:04,262
You could have explained.
461
00:21:04,349 --> 00:21:08,353
You could have been brave
and accepted what you've done.
462
00:21:08,440 --> 00:21:11,704
Instead, you chose deception--
463
00:21:11,791 --> 00:21:14,881
the weakest choice of all.
464
00:21:14,968 --> 00:21:17,971
It was to protect you.
465
00:21:18,058 --> 00:21:20,800
You tried to rip the thoughts
out of my head.
466
00:21:20,887 --> 00:21:24,587
You tried to steal them
and keep them for yourself.
467
00:21:24,674 --> 00:21:28,808
And now you sit here
in this place, in our place,
468
00:21:28,895 --> 00:21:31,289
and you tell me
that you did it for me?
469
00:21:31,376 --> 00:21:33,509
Do you know what you are?
470
00:21:33,596 --> 00:21:36,990
You're a spider
spinning a sticky web of lies
471
00:21:37,077 --> 00:21:40,211
to protect yourself
from your own mistakes.
472
00:21:42,256 --> 00:21:45,390
I couldn't stand the thought
of hurting you like that.
473
00:21:45,477 --> 00:21:48,045
You think a kept secret
isn't going to cause pain?
474
00:21:48,132 --> 00:21:50,352
I see that now.
475
00:21:50,439 --> 00:21:52,484
If I could go back,
I would change everything.
476
00:21:52,571 --> 00:21:54,181
But you can't.
477
00:21:54,268 --> 00:21:56,662
Just admit it!
478
00:21:56,749 --> 00:21:58,011
You lied.
479
00:21:58,098 --> 00:21:59,839
It was all a lie.
480
00:21:59,926 --> 00:22:02,102
Yes! I lied.
481
00:22:02,189 --> 00:22:03,147
Okay?
482
00:22:03,234 --> 00:22:06,672
I'm so sorry.
483
00:22:06,759 --> 00:22:08,370
I will do anything
to make it up to you.
484
00:22:08,457 --> 00:22:10,197
Please, Sarah.
485
00:22:10,284 --> 00:22:12,025
Forgive me.
486
00:22:15,333 --> 00:22:17,596
I think I can do that.
487
00:22:17,683 --> 00:22:20,643
Really?
488
00:22:20,730 --> 00:22:23,646
You can?
489
00:22:23,733 --> 00:22:27,040
Yes, Reginald.
490
00:22:27,127 --> 00:22:28,868
I forgive you.
491
00:22:34,047 --> 00:22:37,094
See?
492
00:22:37,181 --> 00:22:39,575
I can lie too.
493
00:22:39,662 --> 00:22:41,664
What? What do you mean?
494
00:22:41,751 --> 00:22:43,448
Sarah!
495
00:23:12,956 --> 00:23:14,566
I remember this night.
496
00:23:14,653 --> 00:23:16,873
It's the night you prayed
for a better life.
497
00:23:18,744 --> 00:23:20,398
It's the night
I became a monster.
498
00:23:20,485 --> 00:23:23,314
Becoming a vampire didn't
rob you of your humanity
499
00:23:23,401 --> 00:23:26,186
as much as your own willingness
to betray it did.
500
00:23:26,273 --> 00:23:29,102
My whole life was in front
of me, and it got taken away!
501
00:23:29,189 --> 00:23:30,843
Okay.
502
00:23:30,930 --> 00:23:32,410
What were you gonna do
with your life anyway?
503
00:23:32,497 --> 00:23:34,630
Hey!
That's us you're talking about.
504
00:23:34,717 --> 00:23:36,762
You don't think I know that?
505
00:23:36,849 --> 00:23:39,069
Every time you ruin something
for yourself,
506
00:23:39,156 --> 00:23:40,200
you've ruined it for me too.
507
00:23:40,287 --> 00:23:42,768
I didn't mean to!
508
00:23:42,855 --> 00:23:45,641
It's just when the family left,
I stayed
509
00:23:45,728 --> 00:23:47,773
because I wanted to be
someone else.
510
00:23:47,860 --> 00:23:50,036
Yeah, the cool, slick,
511
00:23:50,123 --> 00:23:52,604
swashbuckling hero
of his own story.
512
00:23:52,691 --> 00:23:54,998
No, only Keanu Reeves
can do that.
513
00:23:55,085 --> 00:23:56,478
He's amazing.
514
00:23:56,565 --> 00:23:58,741
He's so cool.
515
00:23:58,828 --> 00:24:01,918
Ugh, why--
why do I feel guilty,
516
00:24:02,005 --> 00:24:05,269
knowing that I ruined your life
when your life is my life?
517
00:24:05,356 --> 00:24:06,444
I don't make the rules.
518
00:24:06,531 --> 00:24:08,794
Truth?
519
00:24:08,881 --> 00:24:11,057
You weren't ever gonna change
on your own.
520
00:24:11,144 --> 00:24:12,755
You were given a gift.
521
00:24:12,842 --> 00:24:14,757
But you were too weak
to honor it,
522
00:24:14,844 --> 00:24:16,541
too cowardly to own it,
523
00:24:16,628 --> 00:24:18,543
and too proud to learn from it.
524
00:24:18,630 --> 00:24:20,980
You could have explored
how being a vampire
525
00:24:21,067 --> 00:24:23,417
made you a better person.
526
00:24:23,505 --> 00:24:26,769
But instead,
you used it to lie,
527
00:24:26,856 --> 00:24:31,295
to murder, to feed
your own ego and addiction.
528
00:24:31,382 --> 00:24:33,384
You try being a vampire
and see how that goes!
529
00:24:33,471 --> 00:24:36,779
You didn't do that
because you were a vampire.
530
00:24:36,866 --> 00:24:39,172
You did those things
because you're an asshole.
531
00:24:43,002 --> 00:24:46,223
I heard that.
532
00:24:46,310 --> 00:24:49,139
So what do I do now?
533
00:24:49,226 --> 00:24:53,230
That first night,
you prayed for a refund,
534
00:24:53,317 --> 00:24:55,537
a lucky break.
535
00:24:55,624 --> 00:24:59,323
And believe it or not,
you got one.
536
00:24:59,410 --> 00:25:01,325
I'm gonna have to pray again?
537
00:25:01,412 --> 00:25:04,633
It can't hurt.
538
00:25:04,720 --> 00:25:06,243
Ugh.
539
00:25:09,028 --> 00:25:10,987
Dear God
540
00:25:11,074 --> 00:25:14,164
and/or grown-up baby Jesus,
541
00:25:14,251 --> 00:25:17,123
I have to go back
to the beginning.
542
00:25:17,210 --> 00:25:20,779
Please, God,
or grown-up baby Jesus...
543
00:25:22,781 --> 00:25:25,610
Let me be human again.
544
00:25:25,697 --> 00:25:29,353
I don't want to be
a monster anymore.
545
00:25:29,440 --> 00:25:31,964
Let me be the man
I was meant to be.
546
00:25:32,051 --> 00:25:36,186
Let me be the man
that Sarah deserves.
547
00:25:36,273 --> 00:25:37,622
Amen.
548
00:25:46,413 --> 00:25:48,372
Oh.
549
00:25:48,459 --> 00:25:50,679
I was hoping we'd run
into each other again.
550
00:25:50,766 --> 00:25:52,419
Trail of bread crumbs,
am I right?
551
00:25:52,506 --> 00:25:55,118
Look, you're gonna lead me to--
whoa, okay, okay.
552
00:25:55,205 --> 00:25:57,033
Look, I know you can't
hear me or whatever,
553
00:25:57,120 --> 00:25:59,470
but what you're about to do,
I beg you,
554
00:25:59,557 --> 00:26:01,951
please, don't do it.
555
00:26:02,038 --> 00:26:03,256
Leave Abraham alone.
556
00:26:06,782 --> 00:26:09,262
I am never gonna
get used to that.
557
00:26:14,006 --> 00:26:15,355
Maurice?
558
00:26:22,972 --> 00:26:24,626
Reggie.
559
00:26:24,713 --> 00:26:26,628
Reggie.
Reggie, where are you going?
560
00:26:26,715 --> 00:26:27,846
To stop Stanley from killing
561
00:26:27,933 --> 00:26:29,326
the only person
who can help me.
562
00:26:29,413 --> 00:26:30,719
No, no, no,
we need to talk, man.
563
00:26:30,806 --> 00:26:32,111
You missed the assessment, okay?
564
00:26:32,198 --> 00:26:33,722
No one misses
the damn assessment.
565
00:26:33,809 --> 00:26:35,549
Everyone you know had
a target on their back.
566
00:26:35,637 --> 00:26:38,378
Logan the Defecator
canceled his travel plans!
567
00:26:38,465 --> 00:26:39,945
You have any idea how many
hoops I had to jump through
568
00:26:40,032 --> 00:26:41,643
just to fix that?
569
00:26:41,730 --> 00:26:44,080
I begged for mercy, man,
and I do not like to beg.
570
00:26:44,167 --> 00:26:46,256
Nicely spun, okay?
571
00:26:46,343 --> 00:26:48,214
Chilled to the bone.
But you know what?
572
00:26:48,301 --> 00:26:50,173
I don't have enough time
to be having
573
00:26:50,260 --> 00:26:52,784
another visitation from
ghosts of Christmas present,
574
00:26:52,871 --> 00:26:55,178
past, or whoever you are.
575
00:26:58,137 --> 00:26:59,399
Stanley!
576
00:26:59,486 --> 00:27:02,011
Wait! Don't do it! Please!
577
00:27:02,098 --> 00:27:03,229
All right, who's Stanley?
578
00:27:07,669 --> 00:27:09,366
And I'm not a damn ghost.
579
00:27:12,064 --> 00:27:14,414
No ghost.
580
00:27:14,501 --> 00:27:16,242
Just me.
581
00:27:16,329 --> 00:27:19,071
So you're not a projection
of my subconscious mind
582
00:27:19,158 --> 00:27:21,291
who thinks I'm an asshole?
583
00:27:21,378 --> 00:27:22,901
I'm not a projection.
584
00:27:22,988 --> 00:27:24,424
I see what you did there.
585
00:27:24,511 --> 00:27:25,817
Well, the way
you've been acting lately,
586
00:27:25,904 --> 00:27:26,949
it's sort of hard
not to think--
587
00:27:27,036 --> 00:27:28,777
Are you really you?
588
00:27:28,864 --> 00:27:31,170
Yeah.
589
00:27:31,257 --> 00:27:32,476
In the flesh.
590
00:27:34,391 --> 00:27:36,741
You would not believe
the shit I've seen.
591
00:27:41,093 --> 00:27:43,966
Hey, that's not
how elevators operate.
592
00:27:44,053 --> 00:27:46,620
It brought me this far.
It can send me to him.
593
00:27:46,708 --> 00:27:51,234
But how exactly
does that work?
594
00:27:51,321 --> 00:27:55,194
I'm thinking blind faith,
but that's just a guess.
595
00:27:55,281 --> 00:27:56,892
How did you even get in here?
596
00:27:56,979 --> 00:27:58,502
I took the stairs.
597
00:27:58,589 --> 00:28:00,417
I passed the test,
so you didn't have to?
598
00:28:00,504 --> 00:28:02,245
What about the ballroom?
599
00:28:02,332 --> 00:28:04,203
The bartender? Jenkins?
600
00:28:04,290 --> 00:28:06,162
Look, I don't know
what you're talking about,
601
00:28:06,249 --> 00:28:07,467
but we need to get home now.
602
00:28:07,554 --> 00:28:09,513
I can't.
603
00:28:09,600 --> 00:28:11,645
Stanley may be
a figment of the past,
604
00:28:11,733 --> 00:28:14,431
but I have to try and stop him
before he kills Abraham.
605
00:28:14,518 --> 00:28:16,520
- The Abraham?
- It's a long story.
606
00:28:16,607 --> 00:28:18,174
But the assessment's
in five days, man,
607
00:28:18,261 --> 00:28:19,784
and they're not gonna
reschedule again.
608
00:28:19,871 --> 00:28:21,830
We need to get back home.
609
00:28:21,917 --> 00:28:24,093
Begging for mercy
was a one-time deal.
610
00:28:24,180 --> 00:28:25,790
I'm not gonna do
the assessment.
611
00:28:25,877 --> 00:28:27,749
- You don't have a choice.
- Sure I do.
612
00:28:27,836 --> 00:28:29,359
If I'm not a vampire anymore,
613
00:28:29,446 --> 00:28:31,274
there's no reason
for me to take it.
614
00:28:31,361 --> 00:28:32,231
What the hell will you be?
615
00:28:32,318 --> 00:28:33,929
Human!
616
00:28:34,016 --> 00:28:35,408
That's why I'm here--
617
00:28:35,495 --> 00:28:37,410
to ask Abraham
to make me human again.
618
00:28:37,497 --> 00:28:39,586
Reggie, look,
one thing I can guarantee you
619
00:28:39,673 --> 00:28:41,153
is that no one,
620
00:28:41,240 --> 00:28:43,677
not even Abraham,
can do that, okay?
621
00:28:43,765 --> 00:28:46,550
He's not the Wizard of Oz.
622
00:28:46,637 --> 00:28:48,117
He's not God.
623
00:28:48,204 --> 00:28:50,162
The Wizard of Oz
was a congenial fraud.
624
00:28:50,249 --> 00:28:51,685
But God's on the menu?
625
00:28:51,773 --> 00:28:53,470
I may have sent out a prayer.
626
00:28:53,557 --> 00:28:54,645
You said you were an atheist.
627
00:28:54,732 --> 00:28:56,778
I changed my mind!
628
00:28:56,865 --> 00:28:59,693
Maurice, I just--
629
00:28:59,781 --> 00:29:01,783
I want to believe in something
bigger than myself--
630
00:29:01,870 --> 00:29:03,306
greater!
631
00:29:03,393 --> 00:29:04,655
You'll never find yourself
that way.
632
00:29:04,742 --> 00:29:05,874
I don't know what else to do.
633
00:29:05,961 --> 00:29:07,745
Change your point of view.
634
00:29:07,832 --> 00:29:09,225
Okay, look inside.
635
00:29:09,312 --> 00:29:10,792
I already know
what's inside--
636
00:29:10,879 --> 00:29:13,446
a vicious, lying,
bloodsucking monster.
637
00:29:13,533 --> 00:29:15,797
Hey, nobody's perfect, okay?
638
00:29:15,884 --> 00:29:17,842
But that doesn't mean
you can't--
639
00:29:17,929 --> 00:29:19,191
Maurice?
640
00:29:19,278 --> 00:29:20,802
I-- I think we have company.
641
00:29:23,326 --> 00:29:24,980
That is some strange shit, man.
642
00:29:25,067 --> 00:29:28,070
A lot of strange shit
has been happening tonight.
643
00:29:28,157 --> 00:29:29,549
I don't know
whether to fight them
644
00:29:29,636 --> 00:29:31,638
or to give them
Halloween candy.
645
00:29:31,725 --> 00:29:33,336
They're not
what they look like.
646
00:29:33,423 --> 00:29:35,642
Cliches that make
the rest of us look ridiculous?
647
00:29:35,729 --> 00:29:37,296
Ever since I got here,
648
00:29:37,383 --> 00:29:38,645
this place has been trying
to get rid of me.
649
00:29:38,732 --> 00:29:40,299
Attacking me like a virus.
650
00:29:40,386 --> 00:29:42,214
At first,
it was white blood cells.
651
00:29:42,301 --> 00:29:44,782
But now it looks like they're
bringing out the big guns.
652
00:29:44,869 --> 00:29:46,392
They're not vampires.
653
00:29:46,479 --> 00:29:48,438
They're the badasses
of white blood cells.
654
00:29:48,525 --> 00:29:50,353
They're monocytes.
- Okay, then.
655
00:29:50,440 --> 00:29:52,790
What's the plan?
656
00:29:52,877 --> 00:29:54,531
Elevator.
657
00:29:54,618 --> 00:29:55,967
You've gotta be kidding me.
658
00:29:56,054 --> 00:29:58,578
40 whatchamacallit-cytes
on one hand
659
00:29:58,665 --> 00:30:00,929
and a burning hellfire on that?
660
00:30:01,016 --> 00:30:02,321
What is funny to you?
661
00:30:02,408 --> 00:30:04,193
- It's an obstacle.
- No shit!
662
00:30:04,280 --> 00:30:06,151
Why would it present itself
if it can't be overcome?
663
00:30:06,238 --> 00:30:07,718
No, no, I'm gonna hate
664
00:30:07,805 --> 00:30:09,154
what you're thinking right now,
aren't I?
665
00:30:09,241 --> 00:30:11,200
- Blind faith.
- That's crazy.
666
00:30:11,287 --> 00:30:12,854
Crazy,
but it's the only way out--
667
00:30:12,941 --> 00:30:14,203
or in, or up.
668
00:30:14,290 --> 00:30:15,769
I don't know, Reggie.
669
00:30:15,857 --> 00:30:16,858
Trust me.
670
00:30:25,954 --> 00:30:27,607
You just pulled me
into hellfire, man!
671
00:30:27,694 --> 00:30:29,914
Blind faith!
We took a leap and we survived!
672
00:30:30,001 --> 00:30:31,394
No, don't ever
do that to me again.
673
00:30:31,481 --> 00:30:32,569
Don't worry,
I'm pretty sure hellfire
674
00:30:32,656 --> 00:30:34,397
is a one-time thing.
675
00:30:34,484 --> 00:30:36,268
There he is!
676
00:30:36,355 --> 00:30:38,227
- There who is?
- Stanley!
677
00:30:38,314 --> 00:30:40,620
We have to stop him
before he kills Abraham.
678
00:30:40,707 --> 00:30:43,449
Wait, you mean
Abraham's really here?
679
00:30:51,109 --> 00:30:52,589
We're too late.
680
00:30:52,676 --> 00:30:54,417
It already happened.
681
00:30:57,202 --> 00:31:00,989
Stanley was just a ghost
on a memory loop?
682
00:31:01,076 --> 00:31:03,861
Abraham never had a chance.
683
00:31:03,948 --> 00:31:06,124
I don't know, man.
684
00:31:06,211 --> 00:31:07,952
I mean, he's still here.
685
00:31:08,039 --> 00:31:09,388
He's not dust.
686
00:31:09,475 --> 00:31:11,477
Shh.
687
00:31:11,564 --> 00:31:13,131
Listen.
688
00:31:16,308 --> 00:31:18,180
He's alive!
689
00:31:18,267 --> 00:31:22,227
Yo, he stopped the stake
before it hit his heart.
690
00:31:22,314 --> 00:31:23,794
Damn!
691
00:31:23,881 --> 00:31:25,883
That's--that's skill, man.
692
00:31:25,970 --> 00:31:27,885
He didn't just stop
his own murder.
693
00:31:27,972 --> 00:31:30,105
He stopped time.
694
00:31:30,192 --> 00:31:31,541
He made all these obstacles
to protect himself
695
00:31:31,628 --> 00:31:32,759
while he was waiting for...
696
00:31:32,846 --> 00:31:34,892
What? The chosen one?
697
00:31:34,979 --> 00:31:36,981
A hero.
698
00:31:37,068 --> 00:31:39,201
That's what Jenkins said.
699
00:31:40,854 --> 00:31:43,466
Maurice, it's you.
700
00:31:43,553 --> 00:31:45,337
You're the hero!
701
00:31:45,424 --> 00:31:47,078
Nah.
702
00:31:47,165 --> 00:31:48,514
Nah, I don't think so, Reggie.
703
00:31:48,601 --> 00:31:51,082
You are! You must be!
704
00:31:51,169 --> 00:31:52,301
Take the stake
out of his chest.
705
00:31:52,388 --> 00:31:54,172
It's the only way to save him.
706
00:31:54,259 --> 00:31:55,739
Look, there's no guarantee
that if I take the stake--
707
00:31:55,826 --> 00:31:57,219
Please!
708
00:32:14,410 --> 00:32:16,978
Shit.
709
00:32:17,065 --> 00:32:18,501
Nah, that's not--
that's not gonna budge.
710
00:32:18,588 --> 00:32:20,982
Try it again.
Put your heart in it.
711
00:32:33,777 --> 00:32:36,214
No, I'm sorry, man, that's--
712
00:32:36,301 --> 00:32:38,564
that thing is buried
in stone or something.
713
00:32:38,651 --> 00:32:41,480
Another dead end.
714
00:32:41,567 --> 00:32:42,916
Literally.
715
00:32:45,876 --> 00:32:47,573
Hey.
716
00:32:47,660 --> 00:32:49,358
You said
there's obstacles, right?
717
00:32:49,445 --> 00:32:51,447
But you overcame them all?
718
00:32:51,534 --> 00:32:53,710
Yeah, only to fail.
719
00:32:53,797 --> 00:32:56,930
It's like the story of my life.
720
00:32:57,018 --> 00:32:58,976
But you write your own story.
721
00:33:01,022 --> 00:33:03,241
Props
for the positive thinking.
722
00:33:03,328 --> 00:33:06,549
You need Abraham, right?
723
00:33:06,636 --> 00:33:08,899
And Abraham needs a hero.
724
00:33:08,986 --> 00:33:11,336
Okay, I'm with you so far.
725
00:33:11,423 --> 00:33:12,555
It's you!
726
00:33:12,642 --> 00:33:14,252
Me? What?
727
00:33:14,339 --> 00:33:15,558
Reggie, you're the hero.
728
00:33:15,645 --> 00:33:17,429
No, I keep telling everyone,
729
00:33:17,516 --> 00:33:19,257
I am not a hero!
730
00:33:19,344 --> 00:33:21,390
How do you think
you made it this far?
731
00:33:21,477 --> 00:33:23,740
You can do this, man.
732
00:33:23,827 --> 00:33:25,481
I know you can.
733
00:33:46,458 --> 00:33:48,808
Yeah, you did it!
734
00:33:48,895 --> 00:33:50,114
You did it, man!
You really did it!
735
00:33:50,201 --> 00:33:51,681
You are the hero!
736
00:33:51,768 --> 00:33:54,292
Or, in fairness,
just a gifted amateur
737
00:33:54,379 --> 00:33:56,251
who was at the right place
at the right--
738
00:34:02,779 --> 00:34:04,172
Whoo!
739
00:34:04,259 --> 00:34:06,696
Now that was a trip.
740
00:34:06,783 --> 00:34:08,785
Your voice.
741
00:34:08,872 --> 00:34:12,093
It was in Jenkins,
and the bartender too.
742
00:34:12,180 --> 00:34:15,270
Just a couple beacons
from my subconscious mind.
743
00:34:15,357 --> 00:34:19,100
So the ballroom,
the bartender, the corridor,
744
00:34:19,187 --> 00:34:20,666
that was all you?
745
00:34:20,753 --> 00:34:22,190
If you're gonna have
a security system,
746
00:34:22,277 --> 00:34:24,235
might as well
make it interesting.
747
00:34:24,322 --> 00:34:26,324
But stopping time?
748
00:34:26,411 --> 00:34:29,153
I mean, that's a whole
new ballpark for vampires.
749
00:34:29,240 --> 00:34:30,720
Guess that's
what makes me a legend.
750
00:34:32,809 --> 00:34:35,594
But vampire is
only half my story.
751
00:34:35,681 --> 00:34:37,030
You want a drink?
752
00:34:37,118 --> 00:34:38,423
I'm parched.
753
00:34:52,481 --> 00:34:54,961
No.
754
00:35:02,795 --> 00:35:04,145
Rum it is.
755
00:35:08,105 --> 00:35:10,934
Okay, so if "vampire"
is only half the story,
756
00:35:11,021 --> 00:35:11,935
what's the other half?
757
00:35:12,022 --> 00:35:13,545
Ah!
758
00:35:16,244 --> 00:35:18,637
Whoo!
759
00:35:18,724 --> 00:35:21,510
I'm what you call a Nephilim.
760
00:35:21,597 --> 00:35:23,816
Half vampire, half archangel.
761
00:35:23,903 --> 00:35:26,515
So I got an extra
"whoo-whoo" in the tank,
762
00:35:26,602 --> 00:35:27,951
if you know what I mean.
763
00:35:31,433 --> 00:35:35,480
How is that possible?
Like, angels and vampires...
764
00:35:35,567 --> 00:35:37,874
You boys are familiar
with the big book, yeah?
765
00:35:37,961 --> 00:35:39,136
The Bible?
766
00:35:39,223 --> 00:35:41,530
That's the one.
767
00:35:41,617 --> 00:35:44,359
But there's a few details
that got left out,
768
00:35:44,446 --> 00:35:47,100
redacted by the faithful.
769
00:35:47,188 --> 00:35:48,537
See, there are
two brothers, right?
770
00:35:48,624 --> 00:35:50,408
Cain and Abel.
771
00:35:50,495 --> 00:35:52,845
Always wanted
what the other got.
772
00:35:52,932 --> 00:35:55,196
So Cain slew Abel.
773
00:35:55,283 --> 00:35:57,720
But that's not
the end of the story.
774
00:35:57,807 --> 00:36:01,637
See, God had some feelings
about that.
775
00:36:01,724 --> 00:36:04,379
So he went ahead
and resurrected Abel.
776
00:36:04,466 --> 00:36:07,947
And what did Abel do
with his resurrected life?
777
00:36:08,034 --> 00:36:11,037
He just went ahead
and killed Cain.
778
00:36:11,124 --> 00:36:15,781
So God, pretty good guy
on all accounts,
779
00:36:15,868 --> 00:36:18,741
he decided to resurrect Cain,
780
00:36:18,828 --> 00:36:21,396
like he did his brother, Abel.
781
00:36:21,483 --> 00:36:25,356
And what did he get
for his good deed?
782
00:36:25,443 --> 00:36:28,533
An endless cycle of murder
and resurrection,
783
00:36:28,620 --> 00:36:30,666
which became a pain
in God's ass!
784
00:36:33,495 --> 00:36:35,671
So God,
785
00:36:35,758 --> 00:36:38,935
problem-solver
of the first order,
786
00:36:39,022 --> 00:36:41,416
divided the world.
787
00:36:41,503 --> 00:36:43,766
He gave Abel the light
788
00:36:43,853 --> 00:36:46,464
and Cain the dark.
789
00:36:46,551 --> 00:36:49,075
That's how vampires were born.
790
00:36:49,162 --> 00:36:51,904
Creatures of the night,
791
00:36:51,991 --> 00:36:55,081
descendants
of the first killer.
792
00:36:55,168 --> 00:36:56,909
And humans were
the descendants of Abel,
793
00:36:56,996 --> 00:36:59,651
the first victim.
794
00:36:59,738 --> 00:37:02,001
Story as old as time.
795
00:37:05,831 --> 00:37:09,618
So what are you gonna do now?
796
00:37:09,705 --> 00:37:11,228
I'm thinking Florida.
797
00:37:11,315 --> 00:37:12,708
Hey, trust me.
798
00:37:12,795 --> 00:37:14,100
You don't want to go there.
799
00:37:21,978 --> 00:37:24,154
Still works.
800
00:37:24,241 --> 00:37:26,548
Sweet.
801
00:37:30,073 --> 00:37:31,857
♪ Ooh-hoo ♪
802
00:37:31,944 --> 00:37:33,772
What about Logan
the Capricious?
803
00:37:36,471 --> 00:37:38,255
That asshole still around?
804
00:37:38,342 --> 00:37:39,343
He took your seat
on the council,
805
00:37:39,430 --> 00:37:41,084
and he tried to murder you.
806
00:37:41,171 --> 00:37:43,869
Yeah,
dude's pretty messed up.
807
00:37:43,956 --> 00:37:45,828
But politics ain't for me.
808
00:37:45,915 --> 00:37:47,830
Too dirty.
809
00:37:47,917 --> 00:37:50,398
It'll make a monster
out of you.
810
00:37:50,485 --> 00:37:52,443
I think I'm gonna travel.
811
00:37:52,530 --> 00:37:54,837
Venice still above sea level?
812
00:37:54,924 --> 00:37:57,448
Yeah, it's hanging on
by a thread.
813
00:37:57,535 --> 00:38:00,756
Sounds like I'm gon'
get me on a plane.
814
00:38:00,843 --> 00:38:03,019
Feed them pigeons
that perch on your arm.
815
00:38:05,717 --> 00:38:08,546
Whoo!
816
00:38:08,633 --> 00:38:10,853
I love that shit.
817
00:38:10,940 --> 00:38:13,421
But before I do,
818
00:38:13,508 --> 00:38:17,947
you saved me from an eternity
of my own self-imprisonment.
819
00:38:18,034 --> 00:38:20,166
Tell me, Reginald,
how may I be of service?
820
00:38:22,691 --> 00:38:25,737
I want you
to make me human again.
821
00:38:25,824 --> 00:38:28,305
Aww, shoot, dude.
822
00:38:28,392 --> 00:38:29,698
Dude!
823
00:38:29,785 --> 00:38:31,917
Dude!
824
00:38:32,004 --> 00:38:33,528
Dude.
825
00:38:33,615 --> 00:38:35,007
Dude.
826
00:38:38,489 --> 00:38:41,666
Now, I'm the closest thing
to a god as they come,
827
00:38:41,753 --> 00:38:45,453
except for
the actual G-O-D himself,
828
00:38:45,540 --> 00:38:49,587
but that request you're asking
is way above my pay grade.
829
00:38:49,674 --> 00:38:50,849
Wait, wait, wait.
830
00:38:50,936 --> 00:38:52,808
You can't help me?
831
00:38:52,895 --> 00:38:54,549
Not with that, no.
832
00:38:58,901 --> 00:39:01,338
I--I came here for nothing.
833
00:39:01,425 --> 00:39:04,123
Define "nothing."
834
00:39:04,210 --> 00:39:05,821
Well--
835
00:39:05,908 --> 00:39:07,866
Pulling a sword
from a stone isn't nothing,
836
00:39:07,953 --> 00:39:09,999
historically speaking.
837
00:39:10,086 --> 00:39:11,696
And all those obstacles
you beat,
838
00:39:11,783 --> 00:39:15,308
no one's ever beat them ever.
839
00:39:15,396 --> 00:39:19,791
And sure, life is gonna
test you, again and again,
840
00:39:19,878 --> 00:39:22,620
but I'm pretty sure
you're ready to pass every one.
841
00:39:22,707 --> 00:39:24,666
Look, I appreciate
the pep talk,
842
00:39:24,753 --> 00:39:26,711
but I don't usually test well.
843
00:39:26,798 --> 00:39:29,801
Now, I've met
a lot of vampires in my day,
844
00:39:29,888 --> 00:39:31,977
but I haven't met
anyone like you.
845
00:39:32,064 --> 00:39:34,502
Not once.
846
00:39:34,589 --> 00:39:38,680
And I know a thing or two
about that kind of difference.
847
00:39:38,767 --> 00:39:40,333
Hmm.
848
00:39:40,421 --> 00:39:43,859
Hey, bright side,
849
00:39:43,946 --> 00:39:45,991
you kind of sucked at the whole
"being human" thing anyways.
850
00:39:46,078 --> 00:39:47,689
Whoa.
851
00:39:47,776 --> 00:39:49,299
And it turns out
that you might actually be
852
00:39:49,386 --> 00:39:53,303
the special kind
of vampire after all.
853
00:39:53,390 --> 00:39:54,435
Like the mother------- kind?
854
00:39:54,522 --> 00:39:55,653
Hey.
855
00:39:55,740 --> 00:39:57,046
I told you from day one.
856
00:40:04,619 --> 00:40:06,708
Maurice.
857
00:40:06,795 --> 00:40:08,927
Yeah?
858
00:40:09,014 --> 00:40:12,409
You need to know,
your mom and your family,
859
00:40:12,496 --> 00:40:14,063
they're in a good place.
860
00:40:16,935 --> 00:40:17,936
Thank you.
861
00:40:32,385 --> 00:40:34,083
Thank you, Abraham.
862
00:40:36,215 --> 00:40:38,566
You're my hero.
863
00:40:38,653 --> 00:40:42,134
You ever need anything,
I got you.
864
00:40:50,055 --> 00:40:52,057
Rock on, Reggie!
865
00:40:52,144 --> 00:40:54,451
Go on with your bad self!
866
00:40:54,538 --> 00:40:56,758
Maurice, you take care
of him now!
867
00:40:58,411 --> 00:41:00,065
Whoo-whoo!
868
00:41:02,633 --> 00:41:04,026
Whoo, it's good to be back!
869
00:41:14,166 --> 00:41:16,604
I'm ready
to go home, Maurice.
870
00:41:16,691 --> 00:41:19,432
There's amends to be made
871
00:41:19,520 --> 00:41:22,044
and mistakes to be corrected,
872
00:41:22,131 --> 00:41:24,307
but I'm ready
to face any challenge
873
00:41:24,394 --> 00:41:26,875
with a strong heart
and a steady hand.
874
00:41:28,529 --> 00:41:30,574
That's impressive,
875
00:41:30,661 --> 00:41:32,010
even if a little over the top.
876
00:41:34,012 --> 00:41:37,276
And look, um, I'm happy
you got your groove back, man.
877
00:41:39,104 --> 00:41:42,325
But Reggie, we still got
the assessment to deal with
878
00:41:42,412 --> 00:41:44,501
when we get back home.
879
00:41:44,588 --> 00:41:46,329
It's all copacetic.
880
00:41:46,416 --> 00:41:48,636
You know, it's all heaven-sent.
881
00:41:48,723 --> 00:41:51,073
It's all deeply
as it should be.
882
00:41:51,160 --> 00:41:52,422
You sound just like Abraham.
883
00:41:52,509 --> 00:41:54,119
I love that big dude!
884
00:41:58,297 --> 00:42:02,214
Reggie, look, I believe
you can pull this off.
885
00:42:02,301 --> 00:42:04,086
Well, I believe
there's a chance anyway,
886
00:42:04,173 --> 00:42:06,044
but I gotta be honest,
887
00:42:06,131 --> 00:42:09,700
we are probably both
gonna end up dead.
888
00:42:09,787 --> 00:42:11,659
What is it with you?
889
00:42:11,746 --> 00:42:13,051
Always with the dark side.
890
00:42:13,138 --> 00:42:14,575
Nah.
891
00:42:14,662 --> 00:42:15,619
Nah, man,
I'm just trying to keep it
892
00:42:15,706 --> 00:42:17,186
as real as possible, okay?
893
00:42:17,273 --> 00:42:18,970
I'm your biggest fan,
and you know that.
894
00:42:19,057 --> 00:42:21,886
I just--
- You know what it is?
895
00:42:21,973 --> 00:42:23,366
You're a dad.
896
00:42:23,453 --> 00:42:25,020
Like, you're totally a dad.
897
00:42:28,371 --> 00:42:31,461
Well, don't worry, Pops.
898
00:42:31,548 --> 00:42:33,028
I got you.
899
00:42:33,115 --> 00:42:34,420
I'll think of something.
900
00:42:34,507 --> 00:42:35,900
It's what I do.
56558
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