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1
00:00:01,168 --> 00:00:02,668
RAE:
No, you can't make me go!
2
00:00:02,669 --> 00:00:04,089
CLARE: Get dressed.
RAE: No!
3
00:00:04,086 --> 00:00:05,086
CLARE: Now!
RAE: No!
4
00:00:05,088 --> 00:00:06,548
CLARE:
Just put it on!
5
00:00:06,548 --> 00:00:09,048
Oh, my God!
You're acting like such a fucking...
6
00:00:11,470 --> 00:00:12,680
Frankie, uh...
7
00:00:13,514 --> 00:00:15,354
Rae! God... God... God damn it!
8
00:00:16,058 --> 00:00:18,018
DANNY: It's a little early
for all the screaming, isn't it?
9
00:00:18,018 --> 00:00:20,478
RAE: We need a tranquilizer gun.
The kind for large animals.
10
00:00:24,233 --> 00:00:25,983
Rae, I swear to God, I'm...
11
00:00:27,069 --> 00:00:29,739
Could you tell our daughter
that she's going to school?
12
00:00:30,030 --> 00:00:31,370
Rae, you're going to school.
13
00:00:31,365 --> 00:00:33,365
I'm not going to school
because she ruined school!
14
00:00:33,367 --> 00:00:36,247
I hate it there. Everyone's horrible.
And it's all your fault.
15
00:00:36,245 --> 00:00:38,575
Why is everything
in this family my fault?
16
00:00:38,580 --> 00:00:40,460
Because you fuck everything up!
17
00:00:40,457 --> 00:00:41,957
Do not speak to me like that!
18
00:00:41,959 --> 00:00:43,169
Don't talk to me like that!
19
00:00:43,168 --> 00:00:44,798
DANNY:
Okay, okay, enough. Enough, all right?
20
00:00:44,795 --> 00:00:46,665
Rae, you're going to school.
Go get dressed.
21
00:00:46,672 --> 00:00:48,802
- Thank you!
- Fine. Fine! Okay.
22
00:00:48,799 --> 00:00:50,469
Then I'm gonna transfer to Douglass.
23
00:00:50,467 --> 00:00:51,967
No, you're not. Douglass sucks.
24
00:00:51,969 --> 00:00:53,389
Okay. I went to Douglass, all right?
25
00:00:53,387 --> 00:00:55,007
Yeah, you're the one
who told me that it sucks.
26
00:00:55,013 --> 00:00:57,643
Wow. Well, white feminism strikes again!
27
00:00:57,641 --> 00:00:59,271
Sorry, what exactly is so wrong
28
00:00:59,268 --> 00:01:02,768
about a predominantly Black
public high school, Mom?
29
00:01:02,771 --> 00:01:04,151
We chose St. Anne's
30
00:01:04,147 --> 00:01:06,817
because we wanted you
to go to a good college.
31
00:01:06,817 --> 00:01:08,437
I don't care about college!
32
00:01:08,443 --> 00:01:09,783
I'm not even going to college!
33
00:01:09,778 --> 00:01:10,698
- DANNY: Whoa, Rae!
- Wait, whoa!
34
00:01:10,696 --> 00:01:11,856
What are you saying right now?
35
00:01:11,864 --> 00:01:13,124
Nobody's listening to me!
36
00:01:13,115 --> 00:01:14,365
Yes, I am listening to you.
37
00:01:14,366 --> 00:01:16,116
That's why I just said,
"What are you saying?"
38
00:01:16,118 --> 00:01:19,118
If you don't let me transfer,
then I'm going to drop out!
39
00:01:19,121 --> 00:01:20,911
[yelling] That's enough!
You're not dropping out.
40
00:01:20,914 --> 00:01:23,174
You're late. Go get dressed.
41
00:01:23,166 --> 00:01:24,166
This is done.
42
00:01:26,545 --> 00:01:28,045
- Hey.
- Don't touch me!
43
00:01:28,046 --> 00:01:29,296
Hey!
44
00:01:29,298 --> 00:01:30,258
Listen to me.
45
00:01:31,008 --> 00:01:35,888
You are finishing high school,
and then you are going to go to college
46
00:01:35,888 --> 00:01:39,518
because that is what you are going to do.
47
00:01:40,517 --> 00:01:41,517
Okay?
48
00:01:41,518 --> 00:01:43,978
Mm-hmm?
Well, Dad, he didn't finish college.
49
00:01:43,979 --> 00:01:45,229
And he regrets it.
50
00:01:45,230 --> 00:01:46,480
What? Neither did you.
51
00:01:48,150 --> 00:01:49,150
[sighs]
52
00:01:50,319 --> 00:01:51,319
RAE:
What?
53
00:01:52,446 --> 00:01:53,946
- You dropped out of college.
- No.
54
00:01:58,035 --> 00:02:01,655
Just get your fucking backpack
and get dressed for school now.
55
00:02:04,583 --> 00:02:05,583
Go!
56
00:02:05,584 --> 00:02:06,964
RAE:
[scoffs] Oh, my God.
57
00:02:08,879 --> 00:02:09,879
DANNY:
[softly] I'm sorry.
58
00:02:10,714 --> 00:02:11,554
Hey.
59
00:02:11,548 --> 00:02:12,928
Thank you! Jesus!
60
00:02:15,302 --> 00:02:16,302
[Clare sighs]
61
00:02:16,678 --> 00:02:17,928
Okay.
62
00:02:18,514 --> 00:02:19,524
What is this?
63
00:02:22,559 --> 00:02:23,809
DANNY:
I know you don't think you'll walk away.
64
00:02:23,810 --> 00:02:25,600
Bring your ass back here, Rae!
65
00:02:28,065 --> 00:02:29,315
[Rae sighs]
66
00:02:34,947 --> 00:02:37,947
♪ Where Is My Mind by Pixies playing ♪
67
00:02:43,956 --> 00:02:44,956
What the hell is this?
68
00:02:46,416 --> 00:02:48,916
A nose mug. I made it in Ceramics.
69
00:02:50,671 --> 00:02:51,841
Why would you make this?
70
00:02:52,256 --> 00:02:54,256
Because... I was gonna
give it to you for Mother's Day.
71
00:02:54,842 --> 00:02:58,102
♪ Try this trick and spin it, yeah ♪
72
00:02:59,388 --> 00:03:01,008
♪ Your head will collapse ♪
73
00:03:01,014 --> 00:03:02,814
♪ But there's nothing in it ♪
74
00:03:02,808 --> 00:03:04,478
♪ And you'll ask yourself ♪
75
00:03:05,060 --> 00:03:06,940
♪ Where is my mind? ♪
76
00:03:07,896 --> 00:03:09,516
♪ Where is my mind? ♪
77
00:03:10,107 --> 00:03:13,567
♪ Where is my mind? ♪
78
00:03:14,695 --> 00:03:15,695
BOY:
'Sup.
79
00:03:17,447 --> 00:03:18,407
What?
80
00:03:19,241 --> 00:03:20,281
You look really familiar.
81
00:03:20,284 --> 00:03:22,414
[continues playing on headphones]
♪ Way out in the water ♪
82
00:03:23,078 --> 00:03:24,908
♪ See it swimming ♪
83
00:03:28,375 --> 00:03:30,955
Did we bang at a Dead show or something?
84
00:03:30,961 --> 00:03:33,011
♪ I was swimm... ♪
[turns off Walkman]
85
00:03:33,005 --> 00:03:34,755
I'd rather die than go to a Dead show.
86
00:03:35,799 --> 00:03:38,759
MAN: All right, everyone.
Welcome to Advanced World Fiction.
87
00:03:38,760 --> 00:03:41,390
I know that the final quarter
can be a little bit of a drag,
88
00:03:41,388 --> 00:03:42,718
but over the next nine weeks,
89
00:03:42,723 --> 00:03:45,063
we're gonna be having
some good ol' literary fun.
90
00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:47,438
We're gonna be reading
The Nose by Gogol,
91
00:03:47,436 --> 00:03:49,266
The Autumn of the Patriarch by Márquez,
92
00:03:49,271 --> 00:03:52,151
and a number of stories
by Guy de Maupassant.
93
00:03:52,149 --> 00:03:55,029
So, you do anything cool
over spring break?
94
00:03:58,780 --> 00:04:00,410
Climbed Machu Picchu.
95
00:04:03,118 --> 00:04:04,748
[door slams shut]
FRANKIE: Oh, boy.
96
00:04:06,830 --> 00:04:08,330
What happened?
97
00:04:08,332 --> 00:04:09,792
I'm not going back.
98
00:04:09,791 --> 00:04:11,291
I'm done with school.
99
00:04:11,293 --> 00:04:16,133
People are mean and horrible and... mean!
100
00:04:16,131 --> 00:04:18,301
People can be. It's true.
101
00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:20,180
But you love school.
102
00:04:20,177 --> 00:04:22,887
And how will you be
the next Eudora Welty without it?
103
00:04:22,888 --> 00:04:25,268
Well, maybe I'll just be
a waitress like you.
104
00:04:26,892 --> 00:04:29,522
I don't think you have the patience
to handle the lunch rush.
105
00:04:32,231 --> 00:04:33,231
Hey.
106
00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:37,404
You can't let
the worst things that happen to you
107
00:04:38,362 --> 00:04:40,612
stop you from getting what you want.
108
00:04:41,532 --> 00:04:42,872
And if you do,
109
00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:46,367
that is nobody's fault but yours.
110
00:04:52,417 --> 00:04:53,837
CLARE:
Sorry.
111
00:04:53,836 --> 00:04:54,836
S... Sorry.
112
00:04:56,588 --> 00:04:58,088
- BOY: Hey... Hey!
- What?
113
00:04:58,090 --> 00:04:58,970
- Hey.
- What?
114
00:04:58,966 --> 00:05:00,506
You, uh, you forgot this.
115
00:05:00,509 --> 00:05:01,549
Okay. Thank you.
116
00:05:01,969 --> 00:05:03,549
Do you wanna go
get a drink or something?
117
00:05:04,221 --> 00:05:05,851
We went to junior high together, Eric.
118
00:05:05,848 --> 00:05:08,178
And you terrorized me. So, yeah, no.
119
00:05:11,895 --> 00:05:14,265
JESS: You... You can't get high in here.
I mean, this is our home.
120
00:05:15,065 --> 00:05:16,065
[exhales]
121
00:05:20,404 --> 00:05:21,704
- It's, uh...
- What's wrong?
122
00:05:23,407 --> 00:05:24,407
[softly] Your brother.
123
00:05:25,409 --> 00:05:27,369
He says he's not going back to school.
124
00:05:27,369 --> 00:05:28,659
And...
125
00:05:29,454 --> 00:05:31,624
he... he says he's not going back home.
126
00:05:32,124 --> 00:05:34,334
[indistinct chatter on TV]
127
00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:36,174
CLARE:
Okay, you can't do that in here.
128
00:05:39,840 --> 00:05:41,510
What do you mean
you're not going back to school?
129
00:05:41,508 --> 00:05:43,178
Your narc husband say that?
130
00:05:43,177 --> 00:05:44,297
Oh, Jesus!
131
00:05:48,098 --> 00:05:49,218
[door slams shut]
132
00:05:51,310 --> 00:05:52,310
[sighs]
133
00:05:57,983 --> 00:06:00,193
You don't need
to go back to school tomorrow,
134
00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:03,862
but you do need to go back.
135
00:06:04,948 --> 00:06:08,158
Um, we just buried Mom
three days ago, so...
136
00:06:09,036 --> 00:06:12,206
excuse me for not giving a shit
about high school right now.
137
00:06:12,748 --> 00:06:14,328
I haven't been in a month anyway.
138
00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:21,170
Mom would want you to graduate.
139
00:06:23,175 --> 00:06:24,375
She'd want both of us to.
140
00:06:25,469 --> 00:06:27,219
Well, Mom's not fucking here.
141
00:06:30,516 --> 00:06:31,806
CLARE:
Mom!
142
00:06:33,268 --> 00:06:34,268
Mom! Mom!
143
00:06:34,269 --> 00:06:35,729
What is it?
What's wrong? What's wrong?
144
00:06:38,857 --> 00:06:40,477
- No.
- Yes.
145
00:06:41,235 --> 00:06:44,235
Yeah. Yes. Yes.
146
00:06:44,238 --> 00:06:47,068
[both exclaiming, laughing]
147
00:06:47,074 --> 00:06:48,834
Lucas, your sister got in!
148
00:06:49,326 --> 00:06:50,786
CLARE:
Mom, you don't have to do this.
149
00:06:50,786 --> 00:06:53,156
We're not little kids anymore.
150
00:06:53,163 --> 00:06:57,633
You are the first person
in this family to go to college.
151
00:06:57,626 --> 00:07:03,006
Of course,
that calls for a fancy-lady dinner.
152
00:07:03,006 --> 00:07:05,626
Your drinks, Mademoiselle, Monsieur.
153
00:07:05,634 --> 00:07:07,394
Mom, how are we gonna pay for all this
154
00:07:07,386 --> 00:07:09,296
when we can't even afford real Kool-Aid?
155
00:07:09,304 --> 00:07:11,224
That's what loans are for, dumbass.
156
00:07:11,223 --> 00:07:13,563
And grants and scholarships.
157
00:07:14,101 --> 00:07:15,811
And you got some of those too.
158
00:07:18,021 --> 00:07:19,441
I wanna hear the letter again.
159
00:07:20,107 --> 00:07:21,777
[Frankie laughs]
160
00:07:21,775 --> 00:07:24,185
LUCAS:
"Dear Claire, congratulations.
161
00:07:24,194 --> 00:07:26,204
I'm honored to share this news with you."
162
00:07:26,196 --> 00:07:28,116
Blah, blah, blah,
I guess we'll accept you.
163
00:07:28,115 --> 00:07:29,735
Oh, did you see this thing at the bottom?
164
00:07:30,909 --> 00:07:34,789
"Parents of students may enroll in classes
for no additional charge."
165
00:07:34,788 --> 00:07:35,748
Wait, what?
166
00:07:35,747 --> 00:07:36,997
For free?
167
00:07:41,211 --> 00:07:43,131
I've always wanted to go to college.
168
00:07:44,548 --> 00:07:46,628
Okay, but you're not gonna go with me.
169
00:07:52,347 --> 00:07:54,017
No. No.
170
00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:56,809
- No.
- No.
171
00:07:57,728 --> 00:07:58,728
No.
172
00:08:04,109 --> 00:08:05,109
CLARE:
Okay.
173
00:08:05,819 --> 00:08:06,859
Do you remember the rules?
174
00:08:06,862 --> 00:08:08,492
- We don't know each other.
- Yes.
175
00:08:08,488 --> 00:08:10,868
- And if you see me...
- I ignore you.
176
00:08:10,866 --> 00:08:11,906
Except if I talk to you fir...
177
00:08:11,909 --> 00:08:14,699
Like, if I talk to you first,
then you can talk to me.
178
00:08:14,703 --> 00:08:17,163
But if not, your gaze shall not...
179
00:08:17,164 --> 00:08:18,624
Just stop looking at me.
Stop staring at me.
180
00:08:18,624 --> 00:08:19,884
Okay. Okay. Yes. Yes.
181
00:08:19,875 --> 00:08:21,665
Your gaze shall not linger on me.
182
00:08:21,668 --> 00:08:22,668
Yes, Your Highness.
183
00:08:25,255 --> 00:08:26,875
You're a stranger to me.
184
00:08:26,882 --> 00:08:28,932
Okay. Strangers. It's a deal.
185
00:08:28,926 --> 00:08:30,176
- Seriously.
- Yeah.
186
00:08:33,222 --> 00:08:34,852
Right now... You can be my mom right now.
187
00:08:38,810 --> 00:08:40,560
- I love you, Mom.
- I love you.
188
00:08:50,989 --> 00:08:53,989
♪
189
00:08:56,995 --> 00:08:57,995
Excuse me?
190
00:09:04,503 --> 00:09:05,503
Mom?
191
00:09:10,801 --> 00:09:13,051
- Oh!
- Jesus! Fuck!
192
00:09:13,053 --> 00:09:14,853
ERIC:
[chuckling] Pierce.
193
00:09:14,847 --> 00:09:18,677
Have you se... Have you seen a woman?
Like... Like, mom-aged?
194
00:09:18,684 --> 00:09:22,104
Woman like mom-aged? Uh... no. No.
195
00:09:22,771 --> 00:09:25,191
Hey, so "terrorized."
196
00:09:25,190 --> 00:09:28,610
Yeah, that's... that's a...
It's a bit overdramatic, don't you think?
197
00:09:28,610 --> 00:09:30,030
What?
198
00:09:30,028 --> 00:09:32,448
You said
I terrorized you in junior high.
199
00:09:33,699 --> 00:09:36,789
Yeah. Yeah, Eric, you did.
You made my life a living hell.
200
00:09:38,954 --> 00:09:40,084
[softly] Yeah, it was...
201
00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:41,120
Not that I...
202
00:09:44,209 --> 00:09:46,039
knew what hell was. Um...
203
00:09:47,754 --> 00:09:48,764
I have a paper to write.
204
00:09:48,755 --> 00:09:50,045
Hey then, then fuck your paper!
205
00:09:50,048 --> 00:09:51,258
Fuck you!
206
00:09:53,093 --> 00:09:54,093
Is that what you want?
207
00:09:54,678 --> 00:09:56,598
♪ Connection by Elastica playing ♪
208
00:09:56,597 --> 00:09:58,427
♪ Riding on any wave ♪
209
00:09:58,432 --> 00:10:00,482
♪ That is the luck you crave ♪
210
00:10:00,475 --> 00:10:02,385
♪ They don't believe it now ♪
211
00:10:02,394 --> 00:10:04,444
♪ They just think it's stupid ♪
212
00:10:04,438 --> 00:10:07,818
♪
213
00:10:10,319 --> 00:10:11,319
[knock on door]
214
00:10:17,618 --> 00:10:18,868
I might need the bottle.
215
00:10:19,620 --> 00:10:22,790
Sure. You'll have to pry it
from your brother's underage hands first.
216
00:10:23,624 --> 00:10:26,254
Have you read this story
called The Nose?
217
00:10:26,251 --> 00:10:28,131
- JESS: No.
- Mm.
218
00:10:28,128 --> 00:10:32,468
It... It's about this guy
whose nose walks away from his face.
219
00:10:32,466 --> 00:10:36,046
It's like... I just... How am I supposed
to write five pages on this crap?
220
00:10:36,637 --> 00:10:39,967
Come on, didn't you just finish
a 20-page paper last week
221
00:10:39,973 --> 00:10:44,443
about the s... sublime...
subversiveness of something?
222
00:10:45,103 --> 00:10:47,563
This just is different, so.
JESS: No.
223
00:10:47,981 --> 00:10:49,271
One more month,
224
00:10:50,859 --> 00:10:52,569
then you are free. Hm?
225
00:10:53,070 --> 00:10:54,860
A college graduate. Hm.
226
00:10:55,614 --> 00:10:56,624
Yeah.
227
00:10:58,033 --> 00:10:59,703
Magna cum laude.
228
00:11:12,673 --> 00:11:13,673
[softly] How's that?
229
00:11:16,134 --> 00:11:17,344
Does that feel good?
230
00:11:17,344 --> 00:11:18,354
[whispering] Stop.
231
00:11:19,304 --> 00:11:21,474
- [louder] Stop. Stop!
- I'm s... sorry. Sorry.
232
00:11:22,224 --> 00:11:23,234
I just...
233
00:11:23,559 --> 00:11:25,479
- Sorry.
- No. Just...
234
00:11:32,734 --> 00:11:33,744
[door closes]
235
00:11:35,237 --> 00:11:38,237
♪ somber music playing ♪
236
00:11:47,541 --> 00:11:48,541
[phone chimes]
237
00:12:38,884 --> 00:12:40,894
[raccoon chittering on video]
238
00:12:44,806 --> 00:12:47,806
♪ somber music continues ♪
239
00:13:11,500 --> 00:13:14,840
Okay. So... what are we to make
240
00:13:14,837 --> 00:13:19,257
of what Gogol is trying to say
with this story?
241
00:13:19,258 --> 00:13:22,888
And literary critics have been
divided a century over this.
242
00:13:24,304 --> 00:13:26,014
[softly] Probably 'cause it's bullshit.
243
00:13:26,014 --> 00:13:27,104
What was that?
244
00:13:27,099 --> 00:13:29,809
Oh, man. [clears throat]
245
00:13:30,811 --> 00:13:32,101
Nothing. Nothing.
246
00:13:32,104 --> 00:13:33,314
No.
247
00:13:33,313 --> 00:13:34,693
No, you said it was bullshit.
248
00:13:36,024 --> 00:13:37,034
Why?
249
00:13:37,025 --> 00:13:39,735
Some guy's nose
walks off his face one day
250
00:13:39,736 --> 00:13:42,566
and goes out, has a rager,
251
00:13:42,573 --> 00:13:47,953
and we're expected to... to believe
that this thing that is impossible,
252
00:13:47,953 --> 00:13:50,913
that it's actually supposed
to mean something? Um...
253
00:13:50,914 --> 00:13:52,674
Well, some would say
that it's an allegory
254
00:13:52,666 --> 00:13:53,996
for male sexual impotence
255
00:13:54,001 --> 00:13:55,881
or divine immaculate conception.
256
00:13:55,878 --> 00:13:58,958
But perhaps it's just inviting us
257
00:13:58,964 --> 00:14:03,094
to consider what it would be like
if the impossible became possible.
258
00:14:03,093 --> 00:14:04,933
I'm just sad that
we haven't moved beyond literature
259
00:14:04,928 --> 00:14:07,598
by misogynistic male authors
260
00:14:07,598 --> 00:14:11,138
that can't write about anything
except allegories for their broken dicks.
261
00:14:11,643 --> 00:14:17,073
Like, this... this entire semester,
we've only read one... one female author!
262
00:14:17,065 --> 00:14:18,725
Well, you didn't have any problem
263
00:14:18,734 --> 00:14:21,824
writing a really
fairly wonderful piece about Márquez.
264
00:14:21,820 --> 00:14:23,570
Márquez is different than Gogol!
265
00:14:23,572 --> 00:14:26,782
Then, I look forward
to having you articulate the differences
266
00:14:26,783 --> 00:14:29,123
between Márquez and Gogol on your paper,
267
00:14:29,119 --> 00:14:31,039
which is required for you to graduate, so.
268
00:14:32,581 --> 00:14:35,131
That's class. Uh, thank you, everyone.
269
00:14:39,838 --> 00:14:42,338
Claire, if you want a little extra time...
270
00:14:42,341 --> 00:14:44,051
We all understand
that this is a difficult time.
271
00:14:44,051 --> 00:14:45,051
I don't.
272
00:14:49,681 --> 00:14:51,351
[indistinct chatter on TV]
273
00:14:55,145 --> 00:14:57,265
So this is how you spend your life?
LUCAS: Shhh.
274
00:14:58,690 --> 00:15:01,070
Oh, you just made me
miss what Monica said.
275
00:15:05,697 --> 00:15:07,817
Um, she was in a coma last week,
276
00:15:07,824 --> 00:15:10,544
but they think that
she's gonna beat her breast cancer.
277
00:15:14,790 --> 00:15:15,790
Good for her.
278
00:15:17,209 --> 00:15:21,259
...and vomiting and waking up
having your hair on the pillow
next to you...
279
00:15:21,255 --> 00:15:25,425
That's a stupid
fucking cancer-hero narrative.
280
00:15:25,425 --> 00:15:26,715
Like... [scoffs]
281
00:15:28,053 --> 00:15:30,763
Mom died
'cause she didn't wanna live badly enough?
282
00:15:35,894 --> 00:15:36,904
I like the show.
283
00:15:41,567 --> 00:15:44,237
...just keep going on
this whole process...
284
00:15:44,236 --> 00:15:46,446
Do you ever think about why,
out of all the people in the world,
285
00:15:46,446 --> 00:15:48,866
Mom had to die
while everyone else just gets to live?
286
00:15:50,701 --> 00:15:51,701
Yeah.
287
00:15:54,454 --> 00:15:55,874
It makes me hate everyone.
288
00:15:58,625 --> 00:15:59,625
And everything.
289
00:16:03,755 --> 00:16:04,755
You wanna get wasted?
290
00:16:06,592 --> 00:16:09,602
♪ Supernova by Liz Phair playing ♪
291
00:16:11,263 --> 00:16:12,263
Fuck!
292
00:16:12,264 --> 00:16:13,474
- Can we get another one?
- Oh.
293
00:16:14,224 --> 00:16:15,564
- You all right?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
294
00:16:16,727 --> 00:16:20,607
♪ I have looked all over the place ♪
295
00:16:20,606 --> 00:16:22,896
♪ But you have got... ♪
296
00:16:22,900 --> 00:16:24,940
He's my brother.
Who do you think is older?
297
00:16:24,943 --> 00:16:27,573
I think she looks older,
but I look more mature.
298
00:16:27,571 --> 00:16:28,611
What does that even mean?
299
00:16:29,239 --> 00:16:34,909
♪ Your eyelashes sparkle
like gilded grass ♪
300
00:16:34,912 --> 00:16:38,332
♪ And your lips are sweet and slippery ♪
301
00:16:38,332 --> 00:16:42,382
♪ Like a cherub's bare wet ass ♪
302
00:16:42,377 --> 00:16:46,587
♪ 'Cause you're a human supernova... ♪
303
00:16:47,174 --> 00:16:49,804
- Clare? Come on.
- What the fuck?
304
00:16:49,801 --> 00:16:50,801
Oh, my God. Sorry.
305
00:16:50,802 --> 00:16:51,972
What the fuck?
LUCAS: What?
306
00:16:54,640 --> 00:16:55,770
Come on.
307
00:16:58,977 --> 00:16:59,977
Ow!
308
00:16:59,978 --> 00:17:01,058
What the fuck?
309
00:17:01,813 --> 00:17:02,863
Claire, you're...
310
00:17:03,565 --> 00:17:06,775
you're married, and then,
now you're just a lesbian or something?
311
00:17:06,777 --> 00:17:10,157
I'm not anything, Lucas.
I'm whatever the fuck I want to be.
312
00:17:10,155 --> 00:17:11,365
Oh, does Jess know that?
313
00:17:11,365 --> 00:17:12,985
Okay, I'm a terrible person!
314
00:17:13,617 --> 00:17:14,617
Okay?
315
00:17:16,411 --> 00:17:17,701
I cheated on Jess.
316
00:17:18,205 --> 00:17:19,535
She was a chick.
317
00:17:21,208 --> 00:17:23,338
Jess doesn't even have to know about it.
318
00:17:23,335 --> 00:17:24,335
No.
319
00:17:25,629 --> 00:17:27,089
I'm not talking about her.
320
00:17:27,089 --> 00:17:28,219
What?
321
00:17:28,715 --> 00:17:30,125
Do you remember Joel?
322
00:17:30,133 --> 00:17:32,553
[urinating]
At the funeral home?
323
00:17:33,720 --> 00:17:34,720
Yeah, he and I...
324
00:17:36,265 --> 00:17:37,385
Before Mom's funeral.
325
00:17:37,891 --> 00:17:40,021
- He and you what?
- We boned.
326
00:17:40,477 --> 00:17:42,557
And then a few weeks ago,
I did the same thing with...
327
00:17:43,313 --> 00:17:46,613
this guy who used to bully me
in junior high.
328
00:17:48,694 --> 00:17:49,954
He's a Deadhead now.
329
00:17:49,945 --> 00:17:51,195
What the fuck?
330
00:17:51,196 --> 00:17:54,576
Uh, Eric... Eric Olsen.
Do you remember him?
331
00:17:55,450 --> 00:17:57,040
We did it in the back of his Bronco.
332
00:17:59,997 --> 00:18:01,707
Jesus Christ! Who are you?
333
00:18:02,958 --> 00:18:05,498
You're like Carly on General Hospital.
She fucks everybody.
334
00:18:11,133 --> 00:18:12,723
I can't be good without her.
335
00:18:24,855 --> 00:18:27,855
♪
336
00:18:32,946 --> 00:18:35,946
[indistinct chatter]
337
00:18:39,536 --> 00:18:41,996
Um... Um,
I'll catch up with you guys later.
338
00:18:41,997 --> 00:18:43,207
- Okay.
339
00:18:43,207 --> 00:18:44,207
- Bye.
- Bye.
340
00:18:53,091 --> 00:18:54,591
- Good morning!
- [gasps] Oh, dear God!
341
00:18:56,512 --> 00:18:58,182
- I brought you some coffee.
- Yeah.
342
00:18:58,764 --> 00:19:00,104
It doesn't make up for it.
343
00:19:00,098 --> 00:19:01,098
You feel good?
344
00:19:01,099 --> 00:19:02,519
- You're gonna kill finals.
- Okay.
345
00:19:02,935 --> 00:19:05,895
- Did you sleep here?
- Early test. Too far to drive.
346
00:19:05,896 --> 00:19:07,356
Okay. Go, go, go. Gotta study.
347
00:19:07,356 --> 00:19:08,766
- Okay. Good luck.
- Okay.
348
00:19:08,774 --> 00:19:10,114
- I love you.
- I love you too.
349
00:19:10,108 --> 00:19:11,358
- Bye.
- Bye.
350
00:19:11,360 --> 00:19:13,990
- Don't do that again.
- Bye. [chuckles]
351
00:19:18,700 --> 00:19:21,700
♪ somber music playing ♪
352
00:19:25,499 --> 00:19:29,959
[music playing on Walkman]
353
00:19:36,885 --> 00:19:39,885
♪
354
00:19:56,405 --> 00:19:57,695
Clare?
355
00:19:57,698 --> 00:20:01,578
Oh, I'm... I'm sorry. Just... Shhh.
356
00:20:02,369 --> 00:20:03,579
Well, where were you?
357
00:20:06,081 --> 00:20:08,211
- At the library.
- Oh, really?
358
00:20:08,208 --> 00:20:09,168
Ow!
359
00:20:09,877 --> 00:20:10,877
Fuck!
360
00:20:11,336 --> 00:20:14,256
I was trying to... finish that paper.
361
00:20:15,924 --> 00:20:17,844
- Yeah?
- You know, the one
that I have to g... graduate,
362
00:20:17,843 --> 00:20:20,803
and I just can't fucking start it.
363
00:20:20,804 --> 00:20:22,144
[sighs] Are you drunk?
364
00:20:23,515 --> 00:20:24,515
What?
365
00:20:25,058 --> 00:20:26,888
Were you trying to write it drunk?
366
00:20:27,895 --> 00:20:29,555
All writers drink.
367
00:20:29,563 --> 00:20:30,563
It's called...
368
00:20:31,398 --> 00:20:32,568
lubrication.
369
00:20:33,317 --> 00:20:35,857
I'm just following
in a grand literary tradition.
370
00:20:35,861 --> 00:20:36,861
Lucas was wasted too.
371
00:20:36,862 --> 00:20:40,822
He came home a couple of hours ago
and he puked all over the bathroom.
372
00:20:41,909 --> 00:20:43,409
Yuck. Sorry.
373
00:20:46,330 --> 00:20:48,580
[exhales deeply]
374
00:20:53,337 --> 00:20:55,337
No. He's in high school, Clare.
375
00:20:57,424 --> 00:20:58,434
He's a kid.
376
00:21:02,387 --> 00:21:04,007
Someone has to look after him.
377
00:21:04,014 --> 00:21:05,564
Yeah, he needs his mom.
378
00:21:16,401 --> 00:21:17,611
We need our mom.
379
00:21:22,699 --> 00:21:24,699
♪
380
00:21:25,452 --> 00:21:31,462
♪ Paper roses, paper roses ♪
381
00:21:33,293 --> 00:21:37,593
♪ Oh, how real they seem... ♪
382
00:21:37,589 --> 00:21:38,919
Mom?
383
00:21:40,092 --> 00:21:43,302
♪ But they're only... ♪
384
00:21:43,887 --> 00:21:44,887
Mom?
385
00:21:46,306 --> 00:21:47,306
Mom!
386
00:21:52,521 --> 00:21:53,731
Hi, honey.
387
00:21:56,525 --> 00:21:57,685
You know what to do.
388
00:21:58,485 --> 00:21:59,485
Mom, no.
389
00:22:00,070 --> 00:22:01,240
It'll be so quick.
390
00:22:01,238 --> 00:22:02,238
[gasps]
391
00:22:04,616 --> 00:22:07,616
[panting]
392
00:22:21,884 --> 00:22:23,094
CLARE:
What does it mean to heal?
393
00:22:26,763 --> 00:22:27,763
To move on?
394
00:22:31,101 --> 00:22:32,101
To let go?
395
00:22:36,773 --> 00:22:40,193
What does it mean
when the worst thing that could happen
396
00:22:40,194 --> 00:22:41,454
actually happens?
397
00:22:43,113 --> 00:22:45,163
And it stops you cold in your tracks?
398
00:22:47,451 --> 00:22:51,001
My mother died on a Monday
during spring break of our senior year.
399
00:22:53,290 --> 00:22:54,420
Mine and hers.
400
00:22:56,084 --> 00:22:59,134
After her funeral,
I immediately went back to school
401
00:22:59,129 --> 00:23:00,799
because she begged me to.
402
00:23:03,759 --> 00:23:05,049
To prove her life mattered,
403
00:23:05,052 --> 00:23:08,682
I became determined
to blow up the life I'd begun to build,
404
00:23:11,266 --> 00:23:13,136
the life my mother had wanted for me.
405
00:23:14,937 --> 00:23:16,227
I failed to get my diploma
406
00:23:16,230 --> 00:23:19,440
because I didn't complete
a five-page paper on a short story
407
00:23:19,441 --> 00:23:22,401
about a man who woke up one day
and couldn't find his nose.
408
00:23:24,071 --> 00:23:25,201
I couldn't bring myself to do it
409
00:23:25,197 --> 00:23:28,907
because I thought the story
was preposterous and incomprehensible.
410
00:23:29,576 --> 00:23:31,076
ERIC:
I saw what they're doing for your mom.
411
00:23:31,995 --> 00:23:33,495
I'm so sorry.
412
00:23:34,748 --> 00:23:35,998
I had no idea.
413
00:23:38,710 --> 00:23:39,710
Thanks.
414
00:23:40,212 --> 00:23:41,212
Yeah.
415
00:23:43,924 --> 00:23:45,304
CLARE:
There was no subtext.
416
00:23:46,301 --> 00:23:48,681
It was simply a story
about what it was about...
417
00:23:51,682 --> 00:23:54,022
- Uh, thanks... Yeah.
- Yeah.
418
00:23:54,017 --> 00:23:55,227
Okay.
419
00:23:59,231 --> 00:24:02,321
CLARE:
...the absurd and arbitrary nature
of disappearance...
420
00:24:10,576 --> 00:24:14,746
Finally, in memory of a gifted student
421
00:24:14,746 --> 00:24:17,206
who left this world far too soon.
422
00:24:17,207 --> 00:24:20,167
CLARE:
...our hungry ache
to resurrect what was lost,
423
00:24:20,169 --> 00:24:23,919
and the bald truth
that the impossible can become possible
424
00:24:23,922 --> 00:24:25,342
faster than anyone dreams.
425
00:24:25,340 --> 00:24:31,050
We posthumously honor
Francis "Frankie" Pierce
426
00:24:31,054 --> 00:24:33,644
with a Bachelor of Arts degree in History.
427
00:24:40,230 --> 00:24:41,940
CLARE:
My mother was alive and healthy.
428
00:24:43,317 --> 00:24:45,277
And yet, seven weeks later, she was dead.
429
00:24:46,528 --> 00:24:47,528
Impossible.
430
00:24:53,118 --> 00:24:54,288
I had gone to college,
431
00:24:55,204 --> 00:24:57,544
and my mother had gone to college with me.
432
00:24:58,540 --> 00:24:59,540
Impossible.
433
00:25:08,717 --> 00:25:10,257
I'd earned straight A's,
434
00:25:10,260 --> 00:25:11,760
and yet, I didn't graduate.
435
00:25:12,554 --> 00:25:14,354
But my dead mother did.
436
00:25:15,516 --> 00:25:16,886
Impossible too.
437
00:25:19,061 --> 00:25:23,571
Sometimes a story is not about anything
except precisely what it is about.
438
00:25:27,110 --> 00:25:30,320
Sometimes you wake up and find
that you actually have lost your nose.
439
00:25:31,490 --> 00:25:33,950
And you have to figure out
how you're gonna live without it.
440
00:25:51,927 --> 00:25:56,847
WOMAN:
Congratulations, Class of 1995!
441
00:25:56,849 --> 00:25:58,849
[students cheering]
442
00:26:16,910 --> 00:26:18,450
CLARE:
As my mother once said,
443
00:26:20,205 --> 00:26:23,205
"You can't let the worst thing
that happened to you stop you.
444
00:26:26,628 --> 00:26:27,628
"If you do,
445
00:26:29,798 --> 00:26:31,428
it's nobody's fault but your own."
446
00:26:44,938 --> 00:26:46,608
Okay, Rae. Rae?
447
00:26:47,107 --> 00:26:49,397
I am calling you Rae, okay?
448
00:26:54,573 --> 00:26:56,163
If you don't wanna do this,
449
00:26:57,910 --> 00:26:59,040
what do you want to do?
450
00:27:00,037 --> 00:27:01,617
I just... Can we just go home?
451
00:27:06,585 --> 00:27:07,585
Please?
452
00:27:09,588 --> 00:27:10,798
[Rae sniffling]
453
00:27:12,424 --> 00:27:13,434
Okay.
454
00:27:18,680 --> 00:27:19,680
Really?
455
00:27:21,850 --> 00:27:23,440
I want so much for you,
456
00:27:25,312 --> 00:27:28,232
but you're not gonna get any of it
if you don't want it for yourself.
457
00:27:30,150 --> 00:27:31,150
[exhales]
458
00:27:32,945 --> 00:27:35,355
Healing is a small and ordinary thing.
459
00:27:39,993 --> 00:27:40,993
[sighs]
460
00:27:43,372 --> 00:27:45,122
And it's one thing and one thing only.
461
00:27:59,555 --> 00:28:01,345
It's doing the impossible thing
462
00:28:02,099 --> 00:28:03,269
every single day.
463
00:28:06,687 --> 00:28:08,687
♪ I Know the End
by Phoebe Bridgers playing ♪
464
00:28:12,776 --> 00:28:17,196
♪ Somewhere in Germany
but I can't place it ♪
465
00:28:17,197 --> 00:28:20,487
♪ Man, I hate this part of Texas ♪
466
00:28:20,492 --> 00:28:23,662
♪ Close my eyes, fantasize ♪
467
00:28:23,662 --> 00:28:25,752
♪ Three clicks and I'm home ♪
468
00:28:26,748 --> 00:28:29,748
♪ When I get back, I'll lay around ♪
469
00:28:29,751 --> 00:28:33,131
♪ Then I'll get up and lay back down ♪
470
00:28:33,130 --> 00:28:36,510
♪ Romanticize a quiet life ♪
471
00:28:36,508 --> 00:28:39,088
♪ There's no place like my room ♪
472
00:28:42,139 --> 00:28:43,719
♪ But you had to go ♪
473
00:28:44,433 --> 00:28:47,023
♪ I know, I know, I know ♪
474
00:28:49,104 --> 00:28:53,484
♪ Like a wave that crashed
and melted on the shore ♪
475
00:28:55,110 --> 00:28:59,910
♪ Not even the burnouts
are out here anymore ♪
476
00:29:01,700 --> 00:29:03,240
♪ And you had to go ♪
477
00:29:03,827 --> 00:29:06,957
♪ I know, I know, I know ♪
34532
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