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1
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[moaning]
2
00:00:04,421 --> 00:00:07,131
[grunting]
3
00:00:09,676 --> 00:00:10,836
MAN:
It's so good.
4
00:00:12,012 --> 00:00:13,312
I fucking love it.
5
00:00:14,056 --> 00:00:16,806
I felt like I was fucking.
6
00:00:17,935 --> 00:00:19,265
[Clare moaning]
7
00:00:20,229 --> 00:00:21,689
Thanks.
8
00:00:21,688 --> 00:00:23,188
Thank you. That's...
9
00:00:24,691 --> 00:00:25,691
Thanks.
10
00:00:25,692 --> 00:00:27,442
MAN:
It's just so raw.
11
00:00:27,444 --> 00:00:29,994
I mean, our readers
are gonna be blown away.
12
00:00:30,614 --> 00:00:33,664
[laughing] I mean,
obviously, with a few edits.
13
00:00:33,659 --> 00:00:35,619
I mean, I think
we can probably change the title:
14
00:00:35,619 --> 00:00:36,999
The Love of My Life.
15
00:00:36,995 --> 00:00:39,285
I mean, it's not
exactly a romance, right? So.
16
00:00:39,289 --> 00:00:41,329
[Clare crying]
17
00:00:42,918 --> 00:00:45,378
It sort of is, right?
18
00:00:45,379 --> 00:00:48,549
Because of the love
that I have for my mom,
19
00:00:48,549 --> 00:00:49,799
who died when I was...
20
00:00:49,800 --> 00:00:51,260
Right. Totally.
21
00:00:51,260 --> 00:00:55,310
But... I mean, it's also
about some pretty mind-blowing sex.
22
00:00:55,305 --> 00:00:56,885
[Clare crying]
23
00:00:56,890 --> 00:01:00,060
But then,
this volcanic sadness about your mom,
24
00:01:00,561 --> 00:01:03,561
and just so much crying.
25
00:01:03,564 --> 00:01:05,864
Okay. So I...
26
00:01:07,359 --> 00:01:08,989
It's all one thing, right?
27
00:01:08,986 --> 00:01:12,946
I'm... I'm making a connection
between two things that seem separate.
28
00:01:12,948 --> 00:01:16,658
There's sex... and grief.
MAN: Right.
29
00:01:16,660 --> 00:01:19,910
- And I'm...
- Totally. Totally. Yes. Okay?
30
00:01:19,913 --> 00:01:22,923
And... it is a...
31
00:01:23,917 --> 00:01:25,627
- It's a brilliant essay.
- Mm-hmm.
32
00:01:25,627 --> 00:01:28,587
MAN: But our readers,
they want the fucking, right?
33
00:01:28,589 --> 00:01:30,339
They want that raw Denis Johnson shit.
34
00:01:30,340 --> 00:01:32,430
And if you fix this,
35
00:01:32,426 --> 00:01:34,386
you could be, like,
a female Denis Johnson.
36
00:01:35,345 --> 00:01:36,755
You could be, like, Denise Johnson.
37
00:01:36,763 --> 00:01:38,393
Okay. Sorry. I don't wanna...
38
00:01:41,602 --> 00:01:43,232
I don't think it needs to be fixed.
39
00:01:44,104 --> 00:01:47,274
Sorry, I just... I believe in my work.
40
00:01:47,274 --> 00:01:48,114
Look.
41
00:01:48,692 --> 00:01:51,452
Unless you significantly revise it,
42
00:01:52,321 --> 00:01:54,361
I don't think that I can publish.
43
00:01:54,364 --> 00:01:56,334
Pablo, this is one
of the strongest pieces I've ever written.
44
00:01:56,325 --> 00:01:57,825
Agreed. Agreed.
45
00:01:57,826 --> 00:01:59,826
And I really want it published.
46
00:01:59,828 --> 00:02:01,078
I need it published.
47
00:02:01,079 --> 00:02:02,079
I know.
48
00:02:02,664 --> 00:02:03,834
Okay?
49
00:02:03,832 --> 00:02:05,252
So lose the sad.
50
00:02:11,048 --> 00:02:13,048
[crying]
51
00:02:25,812 --> 00:02:27,232
- [door slams]
- Ah, shit!
52
00:02:27,898 --> 00:02:29,358
Frank... Uh, Rae?
53
00:02:34,530 --> 00:02:35,530
Rae!
54
00:02:38,325 --> 00:02:40,035
Booker, you seen Rae?
55
00:02:41,703 --> 00:02:42,703
[sighs]
56
00:02:46,917 --> 00:02:48,287
Oh, thank God.
57
00:02:51,088 --> 00:02:52,088
Oh, Rae.
58
00:02:52,840 --> 00:02:54,550
Rae, hi. If you...
59
00:02:54,550 --> 00:02:58,010
Yeah, I've been calling for you
to help me with the groceries.
60
00:03:00,639 --> 00:03:02,349
[sighs] How was the game?
61
00:03:02,850 --> 00:03:03,850
Stupid.
62
00:03:04,852 --> 00:03:05,852
Okay.
63
00:03:07,604 --> 00:03:08,614
So I know you...
64
00:03:10,399 --> 00:03:12,529
I know you probably
don't wanna talk about...
- Correct.
65
00:03:14,653 --> 00:03:15,653
But...
66
00:03:16,989 --> 00:03:19,369
I know that you probably have had
twosomes before...
67
00:03:19,366 --> 00:03:20,616
- Mom.
- ...but this...
68
00:03:20,617 --> 00:03:22,737
I think
a... a threesome is a big leap.
69
00:03:23,161 --> 00:03:24,621
So I was wondering
70
00:03:24,621 --> 00:03:28,251
if maybe you were subconsciously worried
about our little threesome.
71
00:03:28,250 --> 00:03:29,250
- About...
- What?
72
00:03:29,251 --> 00:03:30,251
...me and you and Dad.
73
00:03:31,253 --> 00:03:33,763
- Eww! Ew! Ew! Ew!
- No, I don't mean it in that same way.
74
00:03:33,755 --> 00:03:36,465
I'm just... I'm not saying it in a... I'm...
75
00:03:36,466 --> 00:03:38,716
Not everything is about you.
76
00:03:41,555 --> 00:03:42,555
[Rae sighs]
77
00:03:42,556 --> 00:03:44,056
Is this... Is this about Carmen?
78
00:03:44,975 --> 00:03:47,185
Montana. Her name is Montana now.
79
00:03:47,186 --> 00:03:48,186
I told you that.
[Clare sighs]
80
00:03:49,271 --> 00:03:50,271
Of course, it is.
81
00:03:50,814 --> 00:03:53,154
Why not name yourself
after a beloved red state?
82
00:03:53,150 --> 00:03:54,860
You know,
she won't even return my texts anymore?
83
00:03:55,611 --> 00:03:57,281
So, yeah. Thank you!
84
00:03:57,279 --> 00:03:58,779
Sorry, I didn't mean to make fun of her.
85
00:03:58,780 --> 00:03:59,780
Mmm...
86
00:04:02,075 --> 00:04:03,865
[softly] Mel is gonna gloat.
87
00:04:03,869 --> 00:04:07,369
She... She just always gets gloaty
when we ask for an emergency session.
88
00:04:07,372 --> 00:04:09,542
Well, our 16-year-old
having a fucking threesome
89
00:04:09,541 --> 00:04:10,881
kinda warrants one.
90
00:04:13,712 --> 00:04:16,012
I think it was Montana's idea.
91
00:04:16,006 --> 00:04:17,506
Yeah. That girl is a bad seed.
92
00:04:17,508 --> 00:04:19,088
It's why I never drive her home.
93
00:04:19,092 --> 00:04:20,802
Shit! I can't find my wallet.
94
00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:26,306
Do you know...
Do you know that her mother sells salt?
95
00:04:26,308 --> 00:04:30,438
Yeah. She imports hand-gathered sea salt.
96
00:04:30,437 --> 00:04:32,897
That is her actual job.
97
00:04:32,898 --> 00:04:34,728
I think they live in Spain.
98
00:04:35,317 --> 00:04:37,567
Or maybe they have
a house there or something.
99
00:04:37,569 --> 00:04:38,399
Mm-hmm.
100
00:04:38,403 --> 00:04:39,243
I don't know.
101
00:04:39,238 --> 00:04:42,198
All I know
is that they're rich and cosmopolitan,
102
00:04:42,199 --> 00:04:43,369
and we're poor and boring.
103
00:04:43,367 --> 00:04:46,157
I bet that they're the kind of family
that does molly
104
00:04:46,161 --> 00:04:47,911
and then just, like, has dinner together.
105
00:04:49,414 --> 00:04:51,424
Okay, well,
Rae is never eating dinner there again.
106
00:04:52,042 --> 00:04:53,592
Or... Or any other meal.
107
00:04:53,585 --> 00:04:55,335
Lunch or snack or anything else.
108
00:04:55,337 --> 00:04:58,757
Well, you know, the good news
is nobody had sex at our house.
109
00:04:59,633 --> 00:05:01,343
Intent to commit is still a crime.
110
00:05:07,015 --> 00:05:08,015
I... I don't know.
111
00:05:08,016 --> 00:05:09,016
I... I think that...
112
00:05:09,977 --> 00:05:12,307
almost doing something is different...
113
00:05:13,105 --> 00:05:14,935
from actually doing it.
114
00:05:14,940 --> 00:05:16,530
[car engine starts]
[Danny sighs]
115
00:05:17,693 --> 00:05:18,693
I don't know, she's just...
116
00:05:19,528 --> 00:05:21,698
- She's gotta be smarter, you know?
- Yeah.
117
00:05:22,948 --> 00:05:26,288
Last thing we need
is a... a surprise pregnancy.
118
00:05:28,662 --> 00:05:29,662
[phone chimes]
119
00:05:35,210 --> 00:05:36,380
MAN:
Dear Sugar...
120
00:05:36,378 --> 00:05:39,548
For people out there
who aren't lucky enough to just know,
121
00:05:40,549 --> 00:05:42,799
how do you decide
whether or not to have kids?
122
00:05:43,802 --> 00:05:48,222
I'm 41, I love my life,
and I don't really want to give it up.
123
00:05:49,474 --> 00:05:51,194
I'm a guy who is happy without kids.
124
00:05:52,227 --> 00:05:54,687
But I also
could be really happy with kids.
125
00:05:55,898 --> 00:05:59,068
I've always pictured myself
as a father... someday.
126
00:06:00,485 --> 00:06:01,895
But now, someday's here.
127
00:06:01,904 --> 00:06:04,664
And, uh, I don't feel ready.
128
00:06:05,574 --> 00:06:06,584
Can you help me, Sugar?
129
00:06:07,117 --> 00:06:09,287
Signed, Undecided.
130
00:06:16,835 --> 00:06:17,835
Oh, my God.
131
00:06:20,005 --> 00:06:21,215
Danny.
132
00:06:25,010 --> 00:06:26,300
Hi.
133
00:06:27,638 --> 00:06:28,638
Hi.
134
00:06:29,598 --> 00:06:31,098
[both laughing]
135
00:06:32,059 --> 00:06:33,389
YOUNG CLARE:
So, how's the band?
136
00:06:33,393 --> 00:06:36,233
You guys... back out on the road again?
137
00:06:36,230 --> 00:06:37,610
As long as the van's still running.
138
00:06:38,732 --> 00:06:42,322
And I guess this label in Chicago
might sign us on, so.
139
00:06:42,319 --> 00:06:44,489
What?
DANNY: Yeah. Really.
140
00:06:44,488 --> 00:06:46,488
- Wow.
- Thank you.
141
00:06:46,490 --> 00:06:48,330
But how's the... the writing?
142
00:06:48,742 --> 00:06:49,832
Oh, um...
143
00:06:50,494 --> 00:06:52,004
- Yeah, it's... It's good.
- Yeah?
144
00:06:51,995 --> 00:06:53,285
It's fine. It's, um...
145
00:06:56,500 --> 00:06:58,960
I wrote something about my mom that...
146
00:06:58,961 --> 00:07:01,421
It might... It might be published.
147
00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:02,921
- What?
- Yeah.
148
00:07:02,923 --> 00:07:03,923
But, uh, I...
149
00:07:05,092 --> 00:07:07,052
It's just co... It's complicated. Um...
150
00:07:07,052 --> 00:07:09,472
- That's... amazing.
- Yeah.
151
00:07:09,471 --> 00:07:11,011
Can I... read it?
152
00:07:12,099 --> 00:07:13,099
I'll let you know.
153
00:07:13,642 --> 00:07:15,142
Of course. Of course.
154
00:07:17,187 --> 00:07:20,317
How's Lucas?
He's still living at your mom's place?
155
00:07:20,315 --> 00:07:21,435
Um, yeah.
156
00:07:21,441 --> 00:07:22,441
Well...
157
00:07:23,569 --> 00:07:25,899
He's supposed to be, but most of the time,
he just crashes at mine.
158
00:07:25,904 --> 00:07:27,364
- Mmm.
- Yeah.
159
00:07:27,823 --> 00:07:28,823
He's lonely.
160
00:07:30,784 --> 00:07:31,794
Yeah.
161
00:07:32,369 --> 00:07:33,369
Yeah.
162
00:07:39,626 --> 00:07:43,586
♪ Are you Gonna Be My Girl
by Jet playing ♪
163
00:07:48,552 --> 00:07:50,552
♪ So one, two, three
Take my hand and come with me ♪
164
00:07:50,554 --> 00:07:53,434
♪ Because you look so fine
that I really wanna make you mine ♪
165
00:07:55,058 --> 00:07:58,148
♪ I say you look so fine
that I really wanna make you mine ♪
166
00:07:59,897 --> 00:08:02,437
Thank you
for meeting with us last minute.
167
00:08:03,317 --> 00:08:05,567
I'm glad I was able to fit you in.
DANNY: Yeah.
168
00:08:08,280 --> 00:08:11,370
So, uh, um, I came, uh,
169
00:08:11,366 --> 00:08:13,326
I came home early from work
the other day...
170
00:08:13,327 --> 00:08:14,537
Before she was put on leave.
171
00:08:17,039 --> 00:08:18,249
Okay. Um...
172
00:08:19,082 --> 00:08:22,132
And, uh, I heard some noises
coming from down the hall.
173
00:08:22,628 --> 00:08:23,918
And what kind of noises?
174
00:08:23,921 --> 00:08:27,721
[both moaning]
175
00:08:27,716 --> 00:08:30,296
Uh, sex-ish noises.
176
00:08:32,429 --> 00:08:33,429
[moaning]
177
00:08:33,430 --> 00:08:37,180
At first... I thought it was Danny.
178
00:08:37,893 --> 00:08:38,983
What?
179
00:08:38,977 --> 00:08:41,437
They were coming
from our bedroom. [scoffs]
180
00:08:41,438 --> 00:08:44,108
Who'd... Who the fuck
would I be having sex with?
181
00:08:44,107 --> 00:08:47,487
I don't know.
You kicked me out of the house,
182
00:08:47,486 --> 00:08:50,026
- so I don't know what you're doing.
- Okay. God, Jesus.
183
00:08:51,365 --> 00:08:52,815
CLARE:
That's where we are! Sorry.
184
00:08:56,036 --> 00:08:57,746
Then I... I open the door...
185
00:08:59,915 --> 00:09:02,785
Then I open the door, and it was... Rae.
186
00:09:02,793 --> 00:09:04,593
And she was with two of her friends.
187
00:09:04,586 --> 00:09:05,586
They were half-naked,
188
00:09:05,587 --> 00:09:06,797
and they were just kind of,
189
00:09:07,381 --> 00:09:08,761
uh, tangled up on the bed.
190
00:09:09,633 --> 00:09:11,343
- So.
- Were they having sex?
191
00:09:11,343 --> 00:09:13,853
No. No, they weren't. Luckily.
192
00:09:13,846 --> 00:09:15,136
Well, you weren't there.
193
00:09:15,138 --> 00:09:17,428
Um, it's... it's debatable, I guess.
194
00:09:19,142 --> 00:09:21,272
I don't think I've ever seen you so...
195
00:09:22,104 --> 00:09:24,484
Are you uncomfortable talking about sex?
196
00:09:24,481 --> 00:09:27,651
Uh, yeah, when it...
when it refers to my 16-year-old daughter.
197
00:09:27,651 --> 00:09:31,031
Absolutely. Hell, yeah.
I'm... I'm... I'm... I'm uncomfortable.
198
00:09:31,780 --> 00:09:34,030
And with you and Clare?
199
00:09:34,867 --> 00:09:36,907
- What?
- Yeah. What about us?
200
00:09:36,910 --> 00:09:38,370
I mean,
201
00:09:38,370 --> 00:09:40,000
are you both
202
00:09:39,997 --> 00:09:41,457
having it?
203
00:09:41,456 --> 00:09:42,456
Together?
204
00:09:51,842 --> 00:09:52,932
I wrote a song about you.
205
00:09:55,429 --> 00:09:56,429
Really?
206
00:09:57,764 --> 00:10:01,024
It's not done yet, but... yeah.
207
00:10:03,562 --> 00:10:04,612
I wanna hear it.
208
00:10:04,605 --> 00:10:05,895
[chuckles] Of course, you do.
209
00:10:08,233 --> 00:10:09,653
- Maybe, I don't.
- Mmm.
210
00:10:11,195 --> 00:10:12,195
Nah, you do.
211
00:10:13,280 --> 00:10:14,320
And it's good.
212
00:10:15,407 --> 00:10:17,117
Will you send it to me
when it's finished?
213
00:10:17,117 --> 00:10:18,197
I'll think about it.
214
00:10:20,495 --> 00:10:22,365
Only if you send me
what you wrote about your mom.
215
00:10:23,040 --> 00:10:23,960
Then we have a deal.
216
00:10:23,957 --> 00:10:25,667
- No, that's different.
- How?
217
00:10:25,667 --> 00:10:27,207
- That's different than a song.
- No, it's not.
218
00:10:28,587 --> 00:10:30,007
It's your creation.
219
00:10:30,839 --> 00:10:31,879
We make things.
220
00:10:34,468 --> 00:10:35,468
And we share them.
221
00:10:37,262 --> 00:10:39,522
At least... we used to.
222
00:10:40,474 --> 00:10:42,944
I mean, it's been... I mean, it's...
223
00:10:45,479 --> 00:10:47,059
[exhales] It's... It's been...
224
00:10:47,064 --> 00:10:48,694
I think we're really here
to talk about Rae.
225
00:10:48,690 --> 00:10:49,690
[scoffs] Yeah.
226
00:10:49,691 --> 00:10:50,691
DANNY:
And what's going on.
227
00:10:50,692 --> 00:10:53,742
And... And... And how...
how she's being influenced.
228
00:10:53,737 --> 00:10:59,657
Well, I mean, the most embedded messages
usually come from in the home, so.
229
00:11:00,285 --> 00:11:01,535
So... what?
230
00:11:03,664 --> 00:11:04,674
I've read your work.
231
00:11:05,374 --> 00:11:07,384
I looked you up
right after we first started.
232
00:11:07,376 --> 00:11:09,956
You are a very powerful writer.
233
00:11:10,462 --> 00:11:13,882
- But...
- [exhales] Okay, there's a "but."
234
00:11:13,882 --> 00:11:16,592
Do you think there's a chance
she read your Whore essay?
235
00:11:17,886 --> 00:11:18,886
Slut.
236
00:11:19,638 --> 00:11:20,638
The...
237
00:11:22,933 --> 00:11:24,353
The essay was called Slut.
238
00:11:24,351 --> 00:11:25,771
And there's no threesomes in it.
239
00:11:29,773 --> 00:11:32,653
I mean, if you listen
to any of his lyrics...
240
00:11:32,651 --> 00:11:34,991
'Cause his lyrics
are pretty sexually explicit.
241
00:11:34,987 --> 00:11:35,987
What the hell?
242
00:11:35,988 --> 00:11:39,028
I'm just saying.
"Your thighs bring me closer to God"?
243
00:11:40,242 --> 00:11:41,242
Maybe she heard that.
244
00:11:43,245 --> 00:11:44,495
That's Nine Inch Nails.
245
00:11:45,831 --> 00:11:47,171
Except the thighs part.
246
00:11:48,083 --> 00:11:49,673
Do you not remember my songs anymore?
247
00:11:50,669 --> 00:11:51,669
Of course, I do!
248
00:11:54,047 --> 00:11:55,217
Most of them were about you.
249
00:11:59,011 --> 00:12:01,311
[Mel continues writing]
250
00:12:02,306 --> 00:12:03,306
Danny.
251
00:12:04,474 --> 00:12:06,694
Of course, I remember your songs.
252
00:12:06,685 --> 00:12:09,185
Can... Can we just go back
to hating Montana?
253
00:12:10,272 --> 00:12:12,862
See, Mel always
just makes things worse.
254
00:12:12,858 --> 00:12:14,278
[scoffs] Always.
255
00:12:15,319 --> 00:12:17,649
You know, I think
that we just have to do something.
256
00:12:18,071 --> 00:12:19,071
I do.
257
00:12:19,072 --> 00:12:21,872
I... I think that we need
to go talk to Montana's mother.
258
00:12:21,867 --> 00:12:23,077
Why?
259
00:12:23,076 --> 00:12:24,536
Try to buy some salt from her?
260
00:12:24,536 --> 00:12:29,916
No, because I think that her daughter
just forced our daughter to do something,
261
00:12:29,917 --> 00:12:32,127
- and that she needs to know that.
- Nah. Again, no.
262
00:12:32,127 --> 00:12:34,127
Because she obviously has no clue.
DANNY: No.
263
00:12:34,129 --> 00:12:35,009
And I think that...
264
00:12:35,005 --> 00:12:37,505
She, uh... She used
our house for that bullshit!
265
00:12:37,508 --> 00:12:39,258
Yeah. No. No.
266
00:12:39,259 --> 00:12:40,839
Danny! Danny?
267
00:12:40,844 --> 00:12:43,264
No, Clare. Drop it.
268
00:12:46,266 --> 00:12:49,096
YOUNG CLARE:
Fuck! Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
269
00:12:49,102 --> 00:12:51,862
Dude, are you okay?
Why... Why are you saying, "Fuck"?
270
00:12:53,315 --> 00:12:54,315
Fuck!
271
00:12:57,778 --> 00:13:00,158
♪
272
00:13:00,155 --> 00:13:02,275
YOUNG AMY:
Fuck-me boots? Really?
273
00:13:02,282 --> 00:13:03,702
You sure that's a good plan?
274
00:13:03,700 --> 00:13:05,450
Are you gonna fuck the baby out?
275
00:13:05,452 --> 00:13:08,332
[scoffs] Amy! You're terrible.
276
00:13:08,330 --> 00:13:10,500
You're the one who hasn't told Danny.
277
00:13:12,292 --> 00:13:13,792
I'm gonna have an abortion.
278
00:13:14,294 --> 00:13:16,134
They say good things happen in threes.
279
00:13:18,590 --> 00:13:20,130
I never should've gone on that hike.
280
00:13:20,801 --> 00:13:21,801
I should've just...
281
00:13:22,678 --> 00:13:25,258
I should've just gone to Don Guac's
282
00:13:25,264 --> 00:13:29,024
and gotten a burrito
like a normal hungover person.
283
00:13:29,017 --> 00:13:31,437
You probably would've run
into Danny there too.
284
00:13:31,436 --> 00:13:33,016
Isn't that, like, your place?
285
00:13:33,772 --> 00:13:36,862
- Oohh, can I borrow this?
- Take it.
286
00:13:36,859 --> 00:13:38,899
Goth maternity wear isn't really a...
287
00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:41,320
thing.
288
00:13:41,822 --> 00:13:43,912
So now you're not getting an abortion?
289
00:13:43,907 --> 00:13:46,537
I don't know.
I don't know what I'm doing!
290
00:13:47,286 --> 00:13:49,706
I... I don't know. What would you do?
291
00:13:50,205 --> 00:13:53,035
I'm never having kids,
so I wouldn't have it.
292
00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:54,041
Wait, what?
293
00:13:55,043 --> 00:13:56,213
How did I not know this?
294
00:13:56,211 --> 00:13:57,751
People freak out
if you don't wanna be a mom.
295
00:13:57,754 --> 00:13:59,214
It's like a mortal sin.
296
00:13:59,214 --> 00:14:01,054
Oh, well, people are stupid.
297
00:14:01,967 --> 00:14:03,427
I might feel different
about the whole deal
298
00:14:03,427 --> 00:14:04,797
if I had had a mom like yours.
299
00:14:10,350 --> 00:14:11,350
Mm.
300
00:14:14,229 --> 00:14:16,359
What if this is the last time
I wear these boots?
301
00:14:18,442 --> 00:14:21,032
- You're not dying.
- I feel like I am.
302
00:14:21,028 --> 00:14:22,648
You're not.
303
00:14:22,654 --> 00:14:24,954
You're just maybe gonna have a baby.
304
00:14:24,948 --> 00:14:26,028
[Clare chuckles derisively]
305
00:14:26,033 --> 00:14:27,033
Or maybe not.
306
00:14:27,951 --> 00:14:29,581
Either way, you need to tell Danny.
307
00:14:30,579 --> 00:14:31,909
YOUNG DANNY:
I thought you were on the pill!
308
00:14:31,914 --> 00:14:34,294
Well, I stopped taking it
after we fucking broke up
309
00:14:34,291 --> 00:14:37,671
to give my...
give my body a break from the hormones!
310
00:14:37,669 --> 00:14:39,879
Fuck! I don't think you understand.
311
00:14:39,880 --> 00:14:42,800
Like, I... I seriously can't deal
with this right now. I have...
312
00:14:42,799 --> 00:14:45,799
Okay. Okay, Danny,
I'm sorry it's so stressful for you!
DANNY: Stop! Stop!
313
00:14:45,802 --> 00:14:46,802
That's not what I meant!
314
00:14:46,803 --> 00:14:49,433
- Why are you yelling?
- Because I'm fucking frustrated!
315
00:14:49,848 --> 00:14:50,848
And we're both yelling.
316
00:14:51,433 --> 00:14:52,523
[softly] You yelled first.
317
00:14:54,353 --> 00:14:56,193
Clare, I can barely pay rent.
318
00:14:57,731 --> 00:14:58,691
And the band...
319
00:14:59,650 --> 00:15:03,320
I can't be in South America
when you're having a baby, Clare.
320
00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:04,320
I can't.
321
00:15:04,321 --> 00:15:06,111
- South America?
- Yeah.
322
00:15:07,324 --> 00:15:08,744
Brazil and Argentina.
323
00:15:08,742 --> 00:15:09,992
Shit.
324
00:15:11,328 --> 00:15:12,328
What?
325
00:15:13,372 --> 00:15:14,672
Shit!
326
00:15:14,665 --> 00:15:16,205
- We're just...
- Danny, shit!
327
00:15:16,208 --> 00:15:17,208
...the openers.
328
00:15:17,751 --> 00:15:20,551
It's not... Well, first of two openers.
It's nothing.
329
00:15:20,546 --> 00:15:22,086
What... What am I talking about?
330
00:15:22,089 --> 00:15:24,509
I feel like a fucking asshole
talking about my band right now!
331
00:15:24,508 --> 00:15:25,968
Who cares about my band?
332
00:15:25,968 --> 00:15:27,888
I care about your band.
You care about your band.
333
00:15:28,887 --> 00:15:29,887
And you should.
334
00:15:32,182 --> 00:15:34,562
I love... I love your band.
335
00:15:37,104 --> 00:15:38,114
I love you.
336
00:15:40,816 --> 00:15:44,946
And I don't wanna be some cliché
of an absentee father either.
337
00:15:44,945 --> 00:15:46,445
My family will fucking disown me.
338
00:15:46,446 --> 00:15:48,316
[Danny sighs]
339
00:15:49,241 --> 00:15:50,161
[softly] Fuck!
340
00:15:53,787 --> 00:15:54,787
Yeah, that's...
341
00:15:55,664 --> 00:15:56,964
That's not the same as loving me.
342
00:15:56,957 --> 00:15:57,957
I do love you.
343
00:15:58,625 --> 00:15:59,705
You fucking know that, Clare.
344
00:16:06,175 --> 00:16:07,675
Okay. Um...
345
00:16:12,890 --> 00:16:15,350
- The timing's terrible. Obviously.
- Yeah.
346
00:16:15,350 --> 00:16:16,690
Yeah, we're not even together.
347
00:16:19,271 --> 00:16:21,321
- This isn't that hard to figure out.
- You know, I mean...
348
00:16:21,982 --> 00:16:23,572
I mean,
if this is how we got back together,
349
00:16:23,567 --> 00:16:25,527
- we'd always know this was the reason.
- Exactly!
350
00:16:29,448 --> 00:16:31,118
I'd have to give up music.
351
00:16:31,867 --> 00:16:34,997
I'd have to... I'd...
I'd have to get a... a desk job
352
00:16:34,995 --> 00:16:36,705
or whatever gives benefits.
353
00:16:36,705 --> 00:16:37,745
Like, what are my skills?
354
00:16:37,748 --> 00:16:38,748
What... What can I even do?
355
00:16:38,749 --> 00:16:40,209
I'ma have to go back to school,
356
00:16:40,209 --> 00:16:41,709
get a fucking degree.
357
00:16:41,710 --> 00:16:44,460
Danny, stop! Just stop for a second.
358
00:16:57,184 --> 00:16:58,194
It's okay.
359
00:17:00,479 --> 00:17:02,189
- No, it's not...
- It's okay.
360
00:17:03,273 --> 00:17:04,363
We broke up for a reason.
361
00:17:06,151 --> 00:17:09,321
We need to go out,
and we need to live our lives.
362
00:17:09,321 --> 00:17:11,701
You go on tour. Fucking kill Argentina.
363
00:17:12,366 --> 00:17:13,986
Fucking kill Brazil!
364
00:17:13,992 --> 00:17:14,992
I'm gonna...
365
00:17:16,286 --> 00:17:20,416
I'm gonna go to Iceland
and climb a... glacier or something.
366
00:17:22,042 --> 00:17:23,542
I'm gonna live my life.
367
00:17:26,004 --> 00:17:27,634
And I think you should live yours.
368
00:17:28,632 --> 00:17:31,642
♪ somber music playing ♪
369
00:17:37,808 --> 00:17:39,598
Ugh, what the fuck?
370
00:17:40,269 --> 00:17:43,149
[panting]
[door opens]
371
00:17:43,146 --> 00:17:44,306
GIRL:
Mrs. Pierce?
372
00:17:45,482 --> 00:17:48,822
Oh, hi, uh, Montana.
373
00:17:49,403 --> 00:17:50,953
[panting]
374
00:17:50,946 --> 00:17:52,566
It's a lot of stairs.
375
00:17:53,365 --> 00:17:54,775
Grocery day must be a...
376
00:17:54,783 --> 00:17:56,793
[panting]
377
00:17:56,785 --> 00:17:57,905
...a workout!
378
00:17:57,911 --> 00:17:59,871
Oh, our groceries are delivered.
379
00:17:59,872 --> 00:18:03,132
But I get it.
It takes my grandma, like, a half hour.
380
00:18:03,876 --> 00:18:06,376
Can I get you a beverage?
Or perhaps a towel?
381
00:18:06,879 --> 00:18:09,089
Uh, that's okay. I just, um...
382
00:18:10,007 --> 00:18:11,007
Uh...
383
00:18:11,717 --> 00:18:14,467
[exhales] Actually, water would be great.
Thank you so much.
384
00:18:14,469 --> 00:18:16,889
Uh, still, sparkling, or pH-enhanced?
385
00:18:17,764 --> 00:18:18,644
Never mind, that's okay.
386
00:18:19,308 --> 00:18:21,688
Uh, is your, uh... [exhales]
387
00:18:23,228 --> 00:18:24,648
[exhales] Excuse me.
388
00:18:24,646 --> 00:18:27,976
Is your mom home?
I was, uh, hoping to speak with your mom.
389
00:18:27,983 --> 00:18:29,613
She's in Barcelona.
390
00:18:31,195 --> 00:18:32,315
Of course, she is.
391
00:18:32,905 --> 00:18:34,695
Is there anything else
I can help you with?
392
00:18:36,491 --> 00:18:37,491
Actually...
393
00:18:38,577 --> 00:18:39,747
I was wondering...
394
00:18:43,498 --> 00:18:45,788
what made you think it was a good idea
395
00:18:45,792 --> 00:18:50,552
to orchestrate an orgy
in me and my husband's bedroom?
396
00:18:51,798 --> 00:18:53,008
That was Rae's idea.
397
00:18:54,009 --> 00:18:55,009
That's bullshit.
398
00:18:55,010 --> 00:18:58,600
Maybe you weren't aware
that she's completely obsessed with me.
399
00:18:58,597 --> 00:18:59,807
I mean, why do you think
400
00:18:59,806 --> 00:19:02,226
she decided
to start going by her middle name?
401
00:19:02,226 --> 00:19:03,436
What?
402
00:19:03,435 --> 00:19:05,265
I said "Rae" was cooler.
403
00:19:06,230 --> 00:19:08,150
I can't help that she's in love with me.
404
00:19:08,941 --> 00:19:09,941
Look,
405
00:19:11,193 --> 00:19:12,493
you little entitled,
406
00:19:13,403 --> 00:19:14,783
fucking, pretentious,
407
00:19:15,447 --> 00:19:17,617
little, fucking dipshit.
408
00:19:18,116 --> 00:19:21,576
First of all, her name
is not for you to change.
409
00:19:22,079 --> 00:19:25,539
Second, if someone is in love with you,
410
00:19:25,541 --> 00:19:27,751
you treat them with respect.
411
00:19:27,751 --> 00:19:29,671
Are you sure you don't want a towel?
412
00:19:29,670 --> 00:19:33,880
[exhales] You treat their heart
413
00:19:33,882 --> 00:19:37,262
like you are holding
a fucking day-old duckling
414
00:19:37,261 --> 00:19:41,851
whose neck could break
at any fucking second, okay?
415
00:19:41,849 --> 00:19:44,639
Oh, my God, duckling? Are you, like, 50?
416
00:19:44,643 --> 00:19:46,903
No, I'm fucking 49 years old!
417
00:19:46,895 --> 00:19:49,145
And I know
how to have a fucking threesome.
418
00:19:49,147 --> 00:19:51,687
Not that pathetic little pussy-ass shit!
419
00:19:51,692 --> 00:19:54,282
That's offensive and self-hating.
420
00:19:54,278 --> 00:19:55,778
Do you have any idea
421
00:19:55,779 --> 00:19:59,199
how fucking lucky you are
to be loved by her?
422
00:19:59,199 --> 00:20:02,329
I would fucking kill
to have a fucking ounce of that love,
423
00:20:02,327 --> 00:20:04,157
and she wastes it on you?
424
00:20:04,162 --> 00:20:06,122
What kinda fucking name is "Montana"?
425
00:20:06,790 --> 00:20:10,170
Who are you? Fucking Brad Pitt
in fucking A River Runs Through It,
426
00:20:10,169 --> 00:20:13,459
thinking everyone wants to fuck you
because you have fucking great hair?
427
00:20:14,256 --> 00:20:15,256
[kid chuckles]
428
00:20:20,512 --> 00:20:23,142
Okay, your... That child was filming this,
429
00:20:23,140 --> 00:20:26,440
so you could ask him
to fucking kindly delete it from the apps.
430
00:20:26,435 --> 00:20:27,435
All the apps.
431
00:20:30,898 --> 00:20:32,818
[Rae sniffling]
432
00:20:36,820 --> 00:20:37,820
Hey, guys.
433
00:20:39,489 --> 00:20:40,699
What's wrong?
434
00:20:41,283 --> 00:20:42,283
You!
435
00:20:43,535 --> 00:20:44,745
- Well, I... I...
- Please don't.
436
00:20:48,290 --> 00:20:49,880
There's a TikTok.
437
00:20:49,875 --> 00:20:52,035
[Rae crying]
438
00:20:52,044 --> 00:20:53,094
Of course, there is.
439
00:20:55,881 --> 00:20:57,881
Honey. Can I...
440
00:20:58,675 --> 00:20:59,675
[door rattles]
441
00:21:02,095 --> 00:21:05,805
Okay. If you wanna talk about anything,
442
00:21:05,807 --> 00:21:07,097
I... I'm right... I'm right here...
443
00:21:07,100 --> 00:21:08,310
RAE:
I won't!
444
00:21:08,310 --> 00:21:09,520
Ever!
445
00:21:12,981 --> 00:21:13,981
[Danny sighs]
446
00:21:18,445 --> 00:21:19,485
What do you think of black?
447
00:21:21,657 --> 00:21:22,657
For a cradle?
448
00:21:25,244 --> 00:21:26,374
Yeah. Badass.
449
00:21:36,004 --> 00:21:37,014
What do you think?
450
00:21:37,798 --> 00:21:38,588
It's great.
451
00:21:38,590 --> 00:21:39,880
- CLARE: Yeah?
- Mm-hm.
452
00:21:39,883 --> 00:21:41,183
For a tablecloth.
453
00:21:41,927 --> 00:21:43,137
[Clare laughs]
454
00:21:43,136 --> 00:21:44,136
Mom would love it.
455
00:21:44,972 --> 00:21:45,972
Yeah.
456
00:21:52,521 --> 00:21:56,651
Listen, I'm... I'm gonna get a legit job
and... and help with the bills.
457
00:21:57,317 --> 00:22:00,317
Maybe we could move back
to Mom's together.
458
00:22:02,531 --> 00:22:03,531
Yeah, maybe.
459
00:22:05,826 --> 00:22:07,656
You know,
you're better off without that asshole.
460
00:22:10,122 --> 00:22:11,252
He's not an asshole.
461
00:22:18,964 --> 00:22:20,384
CLARE:
Dear Undecided.
462
00:22:21,175 --> 00:22:23,425
Every life has a sister-ship.
463
00:22:24,219 --> 00:22:28,179
A ship that follows the path
we could have taken but didn't.
464
00:22:29,892 --> 00:22:32,602
On that ship
is the person we would've been
465
00:22:32,603 --> 00:22:34,523
if we had taken that phantom path.
466
00:22:37,357 --> 00:22:40,607
And that person
lives a different phantom life
467
00:22:40,611 --> 00:22:41,991
than the one you're living now.
468
00:22:47,576 --> 00:22:51,786
So the question is:
who do you intend to be?
469
00:22:57,503 --> 00:23:00,883
You believe
you could be happy in any scenario,
470
00:23:03,300 --> 00:23:06,930
becoming a parent or remaining childless.
471
00:23:07,513 --> 00:23:10,523
And you wrote because you want clarity,
472
00:23:11,308 --> 00:23:12,478
but there won't be any.
473
00:23:14,186 --> 00:23:15,186
At least not yet.
474
00:23:16,647 --> 00:23:19,317
There will only be the choice you make
475
00:23:19,316 --> 00:23:22,986
and the sure knowledge
that that choice, any choice,
476
00:23:22,986 --> 00:23:24,656
will contain some loss.
477
00:23:37,876 --> 00:23:42,006
So get out a pen and paper,
and make a list.
478
00:23:42,881 --> 00:23:45,681
Write down everything you know
about your real life
479
00:23:45,676 --> 00:23:49,426
and everything that you imagine
about your future life.
480
00:23:49,429 --> 00:23:50,809
And then look at them both.
481
00:23:51,473 --> 00:23:52,683
YOUNG LUCAS:
Okay, let's take that.
482
00:23:52,683 --> 00:23:55,563
We gotta go. We gotta go now!
483
00:23:56,520 --> 00:23:59,610
[Clare groaning]
484
00:23:59,606 --> 00:24:01,436
- LUCAS: I gotta get to the door.
- Okay. Okay.
485
00:24:01,441 --> 00:24:02,901
- Oh!
- Sorry. Sorry.
486
00:24:02,901 --> 00:24:04,861
Oh, my fucking God!
487
00:24:05,571 --> 00:24:07,241
CLARE:
One is the life you'll have
488
00:24:07,948 --> 00:24:10,158
and the other
is the sister-life you won't.
489
00:24:10,951 --> 00:24:13,291
And you get to decide what to do.
490
00:24:16,623 --> 00:24:18,713
CLARE: [on TikTok]
What kinda fucking name is "Montana"?
491
00:24:19,418 --> 00:24:20,668
Who the fuck do you think you are?
492
00:24:20,669 --> 00:24:23,089
Fucking Brad Pitt
in fucking A River Runs Through It?
493
00:24:23,922 --> 00:24:26,092
Fucking...
"Oh, everybody wants to fuck me..."
494
00:24:26,091 --> 00:24:28,801
- I can't. I can't!
- Clare, yes, you can.
495
00:24:29,845 --> 00:24:31,135
Yes, you can.
496
00:24:31,889 --> 00:24:34,979
CLARE: There are certain things
I wouldn't know until I became a mom.
497
00:24:35,517 --> 00:24:39,437
And certain things I will never know
because I became one.
498
00:24:44,651 --> 00:24:48,071
Who would I have been
without my child the last 16 years?
499
00:24:50,574 --> 00:24:53,374
Who would I have met if I had traveled
to the corners of the Earth?
500
00:24:53,368 --> 00:24:55,328
And where would that have taken me?
501
00:24:55,829 --> 00:24:58,829
♪
502
00:25:06,215 --> 00:25:08,675
I just know the clarity that I longed for
503
00:25:08,675 --> 00:25:11,545
happened when I held
my daughter's body against mine.
504
00:25:11,553 --> 00:25:12,933
What should we name her?
505
00:25:12,930 --> 00:25:14,770
CLARE:
And in that moment, one life ended...
506
00:25:16,558 --> 00:25:17,678
and another began.
507
00:25:18,352 --> 00:25:19,352
Frankie.
508
00:25:22,397 --> 00:25:24,397
[baby fussing]
509
00:25:24,399 --> 00:25:25,899
Hi, little Frankie.
510
00:25:27,903 --> 00:25:28,903
Hi.
511
00:25:33,825 --> 00:25:34,825
[door opens]
512
00:25:40,040 --> 00:25:41,040
You told me to live my life.
513
00:25:44,586 --> 00:25:45,626
This is it.
514
00:25:46,505 --> 00:25:48,505
♪
515
00:25:52,803 --> 00:25:54,183
CLARE:
Do you wanna hold her?
516
00:25:54,179 --> 00:25:56,179
DANNY: Uh, yeah.
CLARE: Here.
517
00:26:00,727 --> 00:26:01,727
Hey. Hey.
518
00:26:02,855 --> 00:26:05,395
Hey, it's, uh... It's midnight.
519
00:26:10,737 --> 00:26:11,857
You think she's okay?
520
00:26:14,241 --> 00:26:15,951
I think she just needs space, you know?
521
00:26:16,702 --> 00:26:17,702
[Clare groans]
522
00:26:18,620 --> 00:26:19,790
You should get some sleep.
523
00:26:20,956 --> 00:26:23,326
Why? What do I need to do tomorrow?
524
00:26:23,333 --> 00:26:24,333
[chuckles]
525
00:26:25,377 --> 00:26:26,997
Maybe you wanna
go for a hike or something?
526
00:26:27,546 --> 00:26:30,546
♪
527
00:26:38,557 --> 00:26:39,557
Yeah.
528
00:26:40,434 --> 00:26:41,444
Maybe.
529
00:26:43,020 --> 00:26:46,020
♪
530
00:26:56,992 --> 00:26:58,952
I'll never know the life I didn't choose.
531
00:26:59,745 --> 00:27:00,745
And neither will you.
532
00:27:02,039 --> 00:27:04,669
We'll only know
that whatever that sister-life was,
533
00:27:05,375 --> 00:27:07,785
it was important and beautiful.
534
00:27:08,462 --> 00:27:09,802
And not ours.
535
00:27:13,133 --> 00:27:14,383
Hey, pretty girl.
536
00:27:15,552 --> 00:27:16,552
Hey.
537
00:27:17,346 --> 00:27:18,306
Hey, man.
538
00:27:20,265 --> 00:27:22,515
Thank you. For everything.
539
00:27:26,480 --> 00:27:28,570
CLARE:
It was the ghost ship
that didn't carry us.
540
00:27:34,905 --> 00:27:38,655
There is nothing to do
but salute her from the shore.
541
00:27:49,253 --> 00:27:50,253
Yours,
542
00:27:51,296 --> 00:27:52,296
Sugar.
543
00:27:54,132 --> 00:27:56,132
♪ Looking Out by Brandi Carlile playing ♪
544
00:27:58,053 --> 00:28:02,473
♪ I went out looking for the answers ♪
545
00:28:02,474 --> 00:28:05,644
♪ And never left my town ♪
546
00:28:05,644 --> 00:28:08,984
♪ I'm no good at understanding ♪
547
00:28:08,981 --> 00:28:12,071
♪ But I'm good at standing ground ♪
548
00:28:13,527 --> 00:28:17,357
♪ And when I asked a corner preacher ♪
549
00:28:17,364 --> 00:28:20,414
♪ I couldn't hear him for my youth ♪
550
00:28:21,118 --> 00:28:24,538
♪ Some people get religion ♪
551
00:28:24,538 --> 00:28:27,288
♪ Some people get the truth ♪
552
00:28:28,125 --> 00:28:30,915
♪ I never get the truth ♪
553
00:28:34,047 --> 00:28:38,297
♪ I know the darkness pulls on you ♪
554
00:28:38,302 --> 00:28:41,512
♪ But it's just a point of view ♪
555
00:28:41,513 --> 00:28:44,813
♪ When you're outside looking in ♪
556
00:28:44,808 --> 00:28:48,268
♪ You belong to someone ♪
557
00:28:48,270 --> 00:28:52,020
♪ And when you feel like giving in ♪
558
00:28:52,024 --> 00:28:55,324
♪ Or the coming of the end ♪
559
00:28:55,319 --> 00:28:59,239
♪ Like your heart could break in two ♪
39905
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