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1
00:00:08,307 --> 00:00:11,275
♪
2
00:00:11,310 --> 00:00:12,771
[ Laughs ]
3
00:00:12,806 --> 00:00:16,610
♪
4
00:00:16,645 --> 00:00:17,875
[ Clicks ]
5
00:00:17,910 --> 00:00:24,013
♪
6
00:00:24,048 --> 00:00:25,718
Man: It's alive!
7
00:00:25,753 --> 00:00:33,561
♪
8
00:00:33,596 --> 00:00:35,233
[ Laughter ]
9
00:00:35,268 --> 00:00:39,996
♪
10
00:00:40,031 --> 00:00:41,800
[ Laughter ]
11
00:00:43,309 --> 00:00:44,506
Yoshi: You know the thing
about living
12
00:00:44,541 --> 00:00:46,178
on a tropical island
paradise?
13
00:00:46,213 --> 00:00:48,576
You get so distracted
looking at all the beauty,
14
00:00:48,611 --> 00:00:50,644
you forget to look out
for yourself.
15
00:00:50,679 --> 00:00:52,679
Wait! Mario!
What about me?!
16
00:00:52,714 --> 00:00:55,011
But now I see clearly.
17
00:00:55,046 --> 00:00:57,321
I don't know what-a you did
to piss-a this guy off,
18
00:00:57,356 --> 00:00:59,653
but-a now he's-a comin' after
a-both of us!
19
00:00:59,688 --> 00:01:02,227
Hey, what's-a one-a little
dinosaur-a gonna do, eh?
20
00:01:02,262 --> 00:01:04,559
[ Yoshi laughing ]
21
00:01:04,594 --> 00:01:05,692
Hunh!
[ Laughs ]
22
00:01:05,727 --> 00:01:07,364
Aah!
- Yah!
23
00:01:07,399 --> 00:01:08,398
Aah!
24
00:01:08,433 --> 00:01:09,564
Ah!
25
00:01:09,599 --> 00:01:11,434
[ Squelch ]
26
00:01:11,469 --> 00:01:13,502
Now we're fuckin'
a-dead, bro!
27
00:01:13,537 --> 00:01:15,999
Let's-a go,
mother-a-fucker.
28
00:01:17,805 --> 00:01:19,277
Maybe we can make
a deal-a, huh?
29
00:01:19,312 --> 00:01:20,938
Yoshi: Die, bitch!
Aah!
30
00:01:20,973 --> 00:01:23,006
You are gonna pay-a
for that-a.
31
00:01:23,041 --> 00:01:25,074
Fireball! Fireball!
- [ Laughing ]
32
00:01:25,109 --> 00:01:27,010
Ha! Fireball toss!
33
00:01:27,045 --> 00:01:28,352
Yoshi, no!
34
00:01:28,387 --> 00:01:30,519
I've known you
since I was a baby.
35
00:01:30,554 --> 00:01:31,850
You were a piece of shit then...
36
00:01:31,885 --> 00:01:34,083
[Italian accent] ...and you are
a bigger piece of shit now.
37
00:01:34,118 --> 00:01:35,359
Fuck right off!
38
00:01:35,394 --> 00:01:37,196
Aah!
- [ Splat ]
39
00:01:37,231 --> 00:01:39,264
Time to welcome the world
to a new Yoshi.
40
00:01:39,299 --> 00:01:40,628
A new me.
41
00:01:40,663 --> 00:01:42,861
Yoshi's Island!
42
00:01:43,831 --> 00:01:46,172
After you got off the island,
Chuck Noland received
43
00:01:46,207 --> 00:01:47,833
millions from FedEx.
44
00:01:47,868 --> 00:01:49,901
You're asking for half,
correct?
45
00:01:49,936 --> 00:01:51,903
I just want
what I think is fair.
46
00:01:51,938 --> 00:01:54,246
Ugh! I can't believe
Trevor ghosted me.
47
00:01:54,281 --> 00:01:56,446
Even though he grew a rattail nonironically,
48
00:01:56,481 --> 00:01:58,107
I'll never love again!
49
00:01:58,142 --> 00:02:00,351
You've been possessed
50
00:02:00,386 --> 00:02:02,584
by a peen-tergeist!
51
00:02:02,619 --> 00:02:03,849
A what?!
52
00:02:03,884 --> 00:02:07,149
Hi, I'm Tangina Barrons,
poltergeist expert.
53
00:02:07,184 --> 00:02:09,921
Your lady bits
have been taken hostage
54
00:02:09,956 --> 00:02:12,297
by the spirit
of his whiz tube.
55
00:02:12,332 --> 00:02:15,498
Your need to perform
a vag-orcism!
56
00:02:15,533 --> 00:02:17,434
Yes! Yes!
57
00:02:17,469 --> 00:02:19,436
[ Screaming ]
58
00:02:19,471 --> 00:02:21,933
Keep on towards
the light!
59
00:02:21,968 --> 00:02:23,737
[ Screaming ]
60
00:02:25,477 --> 00:02:26,905
[ Gasps ] I don't need
to pretend to like
61
00:02:26,940 --> 00:02:28,907
Lars von Trier films anymore.
62
00:02:28,942 --> 00:02:30,909
[ Placid music plays ]
This cooch is clean.
63
00:02:30,944 --> 00:02:32,581
But where did he go?
64
00:02:32,616 --> 00:02:34,979
Into my cooch!
65
00:02:36,048 --> 00:02:37,355
[ Music stops ]
66
00:02:37,390 --> 00:02:39,489
What do you mean,
you don't tip?
67
00:02:39,524 --> 00:02:40,820
I mean, I don't tip.
68
00:02:40,855 --> 00:02:41,986
Boop.
- Whoa!
69
00:02:42,021 --> 00:02:43,493
Ah! [ Laughs ]
70
00:02:43,528 --> 00:02:46,023
Yeah, technically you tip --
you just don't fall over.
71
00:02:48,060 --> 00:02:51,534
Ladies, can't we all find
a way to get along?
72
00:02:51,569 --> 00:02:53,030
You gave me chlamydia!
73
00:02:53,065 --> 00:02:54,504
- Me too.
- And me!
- Twice.
74
00:02:54,539 --> 00:02:57,166
Also, bacteria from
the chlamydia then moved up
75
00:02:57,201 --> 00:02:59,839
to my cervix
and gave me PID!
76
00:02:59,874 --> 00:03:02,446
Pelvic inflammatory
disease!
77
00:03:02,481 --> 00:03:05,746
That's what happens
when the clam
is left untreated.
78
00:03:05,781 --> 00:03:08,914
Ladies, what do you say
we make this a team round?
79
00:03:08,949 --> 00:03:11,290
I'd never turn down
three women at once --
80
00:03:11,325 --> 00:03:13,952
[ Gunshots ]
- Oww!
- [Shouting indistinctly ]
81
00:03:13,987 --> 00:03:15,954
[ Gunshots continue ]
82
00:03:15,989 --> 00:03:23,126
♪
83
00:03:23,161 --> 00:03:25,832
Come on, girls.
He is not worth it.
84
00:03:25,867 --> 00:03:28,164
Let's go pick up
our prescription.
85
00:03:28,199 --> 00:03:30,507
Bond:
Oho, James, you dog!
86
00:03:30,542 --> 00:03:33,246
Wait.
That means I have chlamydia.
87
00:03:35,613 --> 00:03:37,646
[ Motor whirring ]
88
00:03:40,387 --> 00:03:41,518
[ Chittering ]
89
00:03:41,553 --> 00:03:43,388
[ Screeches ]
90
00:03:43,423 --> 00:03:46,655
My date said he'd be here
20 minutes ago.
91
00:03:46,690 --> 00:03:48,327
Ack!
- Ack, ack.
92
00:03:48,362 --> 00:03:50,560
Did you get
stood up, too?
93
00:03:50,595 --> 00:03:51,561
Ack!
94
00:03:51,596 --> 00:03:52,892
Ack, ack! Ack, ack.
95
00:03:52,927 --> 00:03:55,059
I'd love to eat with you.
96
00:03:55,094 --> 00:03:56,192
Ack!
97
00:03:56,227 --> 00:03:57,501
Ack! Ack!
- Ack ack ack!
98
00:03:57,536 --> 00:03:58,832
Yes! Ack!
99
00:03:58,867 --> 00:04:00,163
Yes! Ack!
- Ack ack aaack!
100
00:04:00,198 --> 00:04:02,869
Do you take this woman
to be your wife?
101
00:04:02,904 --> 00:04:04,035
Ack!
102
00:04:04,070 --> 00:04:05,806
I'll, uh, take that
as an "I do."
103
00:04:05,841 --> 00:04:08,138
[ Objects clattering ]
Oh, my God!
104
00:04:08,173 --> 00:04:10,448
Ack ack ack!
Ack ack ack ack!
105
00:04:10,483 --> 00:04:11,614
Ack ack ack!
106
00:04:11,649 --> 00:04:13,946
You have to return
to your home planet?
107
00:04:13,981 --> 00:04:16,014
But we're married!
Ack!
108
00:04:16,049 --> 00:04:18,115
Save me!
Aah!
109
00:04:18,150 --> 00:04:19,116
Ack ack ack!
110
00:04:19,151 --> 00:04:20,986
[ Gunshots, screams ]
111
00:04:21,021 --> 00:04:24,495
Aaa-aa-aa-ck!
112
00:04:24,530 --> 00:04:27,498
[ Sobbing ]
113
00:04:27,533 --> 00:04:32,437
Cake is the only man
that will never leave me.
114
00:04:32,472 --> 00:04:34,604
Ohh ahhh mmph!
[ Sobs ]
115
00:04:34,639 --> 00:04:36,067
Oh, no. Oh, God.
116
00:04:36,102 --> 00:04:38,135
[ Retching ]
117
00:04:39,842 --> 00:04:41,303
♪
118
00:04:41,338 --> 00:04:43,041
[ Engine revs, tires squeal ]
119
00:04:46,343 --> 00:04:48,310
[ Video game music plays ]
120
00:04:48,345 --> 00:04:51,489
♪
121
00:04:51,524 --> 00:04:54,360
Narrator: This week on
"My Strange Addiction,"
122
00:04:54,395 --> 00:04:56,527
meet Elefun the elephant.
123
00:04:56,562 --> 00:04:59,398
Yeah, baby!
That's the stuff!
124
00:04:59,433 --> 00:05:01,730
What started out
as a party trick
125
00:05:01,765 --> 00:05:03,633
turned into
a butterfly habit
126
00:05:03,668 --> 00:05:05,635
that Elefun couldn't kick.
127
00:05:05,670 --> 00:05:07,736
Let's fuckin' rave!
128
00:05:07,771 --> 00:05:09,606
Oh! Oh!
129
00:05:09,641 --> 00:05:11,443
[ Laughing ]
130
00:05:11,478 --> 00:05:12,939
[ Inhaling deeply ]
131
00:05:12,974 --> 00:05:14,611
[ Echoing voices, laughter ]
132
00:05:14,646 --> 00:05:15,612
Ohhh!
133
00:05:15,647 --> 00:05:18,010
- [Distant] Elefun. Elefun!
- Whoa!
134
00:05:18,045 --> 00:05:19,418
Elefun, it's late.
135
00:05:19,453 --> 00:05:21,948
We have to go home.
You're leaving me?!
136
00:05:21,983 --> 00:05:23,279
Try some of this shit!
137
00:05:23,314 --> 00:05:24,621
I don't want it!
Try it! Come on!
138
00:05:24,656 --> 00:05:25,787
I don't want!
- [ Laughing ]
139
00:05:25,822 --> 00:05:27,459
It's trippy, right?
I don't want it!
140
00:05:27,494 --> 00:05:28,559
[ Laughing ]
- [ Groans ]
141
00:05:28,594 --> 00:05:29,560
Kid?
142
00:05:29,595 --> 00:05:31,397
[ Screaming ] Kid!
143
00:05:31,432 --> 00:05:32,794
Next week...
144
00:05:32,829 --> 00:05:34,796
this family
of codependent hippos
145
00:05:34,831 --> 00:05:37,997
enable a bizarre compulsion.
146
00:05:38,032 --> 00:05:40,439
Woman: Oh, my life
is almost spent,
147
00:05:40,474 --> 00:05:42,771
and I had so much more to do.
148
00:05:42,806 --> 00:05:43,772
[ Cat meows ]
149
00:05:43,807 --> 00:05:44,773
[ Objects clatter, cat yowls ]
150
00:05:44,808 --> 00:05:47,303
And I'm back,
bitches!
151
00:05:47,338 --> 00:05:49,305
Boom!
Crushed that candy!
152
00:05:49,340 --> 00:05:52,308
Aw, but I need a lollipop hammer
to finish the level.
153
00:05:52,343 --> 00:05:54,453
[ Poof ]
- Why not make
an in-app purchase?
154
00:05:54,488 --> 00:05:56,488
It's only $1.99.
155
00:05:56,523 --> 00:05:59,854
I promised myself I wouldn't
spend any money on this game.
156
00:05:59,889 --> 00:06:02,593
It's a one-time thing, Beth.
157
00:06:02,628 --> 00:06:03,924
[ Ka-ching! ]
158
00:06:03,959 --> 00:06:05,662
[ Video game music plays ]
159
00:06:05,697 --> 00:06:07,323
Beth, I'm home --
Oh, my God!
160
00:06:07,358 --> 00:06:08,962
I need extra gold bars!
161
00:06:08,997 --> 00:06:10,469
And I need
an extra life!
162
00:06:10,504 --> 00:06:11,602
Beth, you spent --
163
00:06:11,637 --> 00:06:14,704
you spent $1,500
on Candy Crush?!
- Aah! Yah!
164
00:06:14,739 --> 00:06:16,475
We have a mortgage!
165
00:06:16,510 --> 00:06:17,872
She's mine now.
166
00:06:17,907 --> 00:06:20,545
[ Laughing evilly ]
167
00:06:20,580 --> 00:06:22,481
Spider-walk time!
168
00:06:22,516 --> 00:06:24,648
The power of Christ
compels you.
169
00:06:24,683 --> 00:06:26,144
[ Distorted ]
You're one to talk.
170
00:06:26,179 --> 00:06:28,311
You spent all of the church's
collection last month
171
00:06:28,346 --> 00:06:30,115
on Pokémon Go supplies.
172
00:06:30,150 --> 00:06:31,688
You have to
catch 'em all, right?
173
00:06:31,723 --> 00:06:33,019
You don't understand,
demon --
174
00:06:33,054 --> 00:06:34,757
was buy one,
get one free.
175
00:06:34,792 --> 00:06:36,594
It was BOGO
on the POGO.
176
00:06:36,629 --> 00:06:38,255
I had serious FOMO!
177
00:06:38,290 --> 00:06:40,290
[ Laughing ]
You're mind now, priesty!
178
00:06:40,325 --> 00:06:41,962
Open your mouth!
179
00:06:41,997 --> 00:06:44,800
Not today,
vile demon!
180
00:06:44,835 --> 00:06:46,637
Selfless sacrifice!
[ Glass shatters ]
181
00:06:46,672 --> 00:06:49,200
Splat!
182
00:06:49,235 --> 00:06:51,873
You did it!
Oh, God, it's over!
183
00:06:51,908 --> 00:06:54,744
[ Sobbing ]
- It's over!
My, God, it's over.
184
00:06:54,779 --> 00:06:57,373
Anyone wanna play
Clash of Clans?
185
00:06:57,408 --> 00:06:58,550
I do.
186
00:06:58,585 --> 00:07:00,948
Mr. Manson,
you would have me believe
187
00:07:00,983 --> 00:07:04,622
that you did not commit
the Tate-LaBianca murders.
188
00:07:04,657 --> 00:07:08,527
I'm telling you, man,
it was not me.
189
00:07:10,663 --> 00:07:15,292
I, Ponce de Léon, have finally
found the Fountain of Youth.
190
00:07:15,327 --> 00:07:17,866
[ Babies cooing, laughing ]
191
00:07:17,901 --> 00:07:20,198
Men, only a single
Allied pilot
192
00:07:20,233 --> 00:07:22,673
has survived an encounter
with the Red Baron.
193
00:07:22,708 --> 00:07:25,137
Meet America's
World War I Flying Ace --
194
00:07:25,172 --> 00:07:27,139
Did you say "one"?
...Captain Snoopy!
195
00:07:27,174 --> 00:07:28,305
Blah!
196
00:07:28,340 --> 00:07:30,780
[ Speaking gibberish ]
197
00:07:30,815 --> 00:07:32,111
Sir, that's, uh...
198
00:07:32,146 --> 00:07:33,409
Yeah, that's a dog.
199
00:07:33,444 --> 00:07:36,082
That is the World War I
Flying Ace, dumb shit!
200
00:07:36,117 --> 00:07:38,623
And you will heed every single
word out of his mouth!
201
00:07:38,658 --> 00:07:40,790
[ Gibberish ]
202
00:07:40,825 --> 00:07:42,451
These are your
new aircraft.
203
00:07:42,486 --> 00:07:44,893
No idea how they work,
but we've seen the Ace fly one,
204
00:07:44,928 --> 00:07:47,060
and they only cost
about $3 in scrap wood!
205
00:07:47,095 --> 00:07:48,061
Hoo-yah!
- Sir!
206
00:07:48,096 --> 00:07:49,667
These are
doghouses, sir!
207
00:07:49,702 --> 00:07:51,702
They're aircraft,
soldier!
208
00:07:51,737 --> 00:07:53,770
Now mount up!
209
00:07:53,805 --> 00:07:55,002
Oh-ah!
210
00:07:55,037 --> 00:07:56,399
This shit doesn't
make any sense.
- Ow.
211
00:07:56,434 --> 00:07:58,973
Uh, sir?
Where are the controls?
212
00:07:59,008 --> 00:08:01,404
Did you have to ask your mama
where your dick was
213
00:08:01,439 --> 00:08:03,307
when you wanted
to piss, sailor?!
214
00:08:03,342 --> 00:08:05,309
[ Gibberish ]
[ Engine rumbling ]
215
00:08:05,344 --> 00:08:06,816
- There's no way that's gonna...
- Um, uh...
216
00:08:06,851 --> 00:08:08,312
- Oh, shit.
- Ah, that worked.
217
00:08:08,347 --> 00:08:11,282
Oh-ho-ho-ho!
218
00:08:11,317 --> 00:08:13,757
Oh, my God,
they work!
219
00:08:13,792 --> 00:08:15,352
We're flying!
220
00:08:15,387 --> 00:08:17,959
But the peak is really
riding up into my crack.
221
00:08:17,994 --> 00:08:21,259
Aah! They also should have
included seat belts!
222
00:08:21,294 --> 00:08:23,426
Whoa! Hey!
223
00:08:23,461 --> 00:08:25,428
I'm cool with these things
not having wings,
224
00:08:25,463 --> 00:08:27,463
but I'd feel better
if we had windshields.
225
00:08:27,498 --> 00:08:29,971
Ah, what the f--
Ah, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
226
00:08:30,006 --> 00:08:31,401
Aaaaah!
227
00:08:33,438 --> 00:08:36,142
That son of a bitch
is actually doing it!
228
00:08:36,177 --> 00:08:37,682
We're gonna need
more Marines!
229
00:08:37,717 --> 00:08:39,178
And maybe some seat belts.
230
00:08:39,213 --> 00:08:41,114
The Red Baron
is leading a squadron
231
00:08:41,149 --> 00:08:42,621
toward Allied territory.
232
00:08:42,656 --> 00:08:45,085
Now get up there
- and show 'em what we got!
233
00:08:45,120 --> 00:08:46,823
- To the sky!
- Let's fly these doghouses!
234
00:08:50,587 --> 00:08:52,697
Bwah!
- Sir, yes, sir!
235
00:08:52,732 --> 00:08:55,293
Whatever the fuck
he just said.
236
00:08:55,328 --> 00:08:57,603
[ Cats yowling ]
237
00:08:57,638 --> 00:08:59,066
Are those cats?!
238
00:08:59,101 --> 00:09:01,266
How did they train cats
to fly airplanes?
239
00:09:01,301 --> 00:09:02,839
War is hell!
240
00:09:02,874 --> 00:09:04,874
[ Airplane approaches,
Red Baron laughs ]
241
00:09:04,909 --> 00:09:07,041
Guten morgen,
Herr Snoopy!
242
00:09:07,076 --> 00:09:08,911
Dogfights are overrated,
so I thought,
243
00:09:08,946 --> 00:09:10,913
why not switch
to a catfight?
244
00:09:10,948 --> 00:09:12,376
[ Laughs ]
- Aah!
245
00:09:12,411 --> 00:09:14,983
[ Cat yowling ]
246
00:09:15,018 --> 00:09:16,479
Aw, yeah.
247
00:09:16,514 --> 00:09:18,184
Keep that pussy
right there.
248
00:09:18,219 --> 00:09:19,482
[ Meows ]
249
00:09:19,517 --> 00:09:20,516
[ Screeches ]
250
00:09:20,551 --> 00:09:22,386
Aah, aah!
It's in my mouth!
251
00:09:22,421 --> 00:09:24,157
[ Sputtering ]
Aah!
252
00:09:25,259 --> 00:09:26,731
Whoo!
[ Clicking tongue ]
253
00:09:26,766 --> 00:09:29,162
Can I interest you
in a cucumber?
254
00:09:30,132 --> 00:09:31,835
[ Yowling ]
255
00:09:34,169 --> 00:09:36,301
Ha-ha!
I've got you now.
256
00:09:36,336 --> 00:09:38,710
Uh...
- No one told us how to shoot!
257
00:09:40,912 --> 00:09:42,208
[ Gunfire, cat screeching ]
258
00:09:42,243 --> 00:09:44,573
I'm hit!
259
00:09:44,608 --> 00:09:47,609
The laser pointer won't be
invented for another 60 years,
260
00:09:47,644 --> 00:09:49,281
so this will have to do.
261
00:09:50,548 --> 00:09:52,086
[ Yowling ]
262
00:09:53,353 --> 00:09:54,792
Stupid cats!
263
00:09:54,827 --> 00:09:58,125
♪
264
00:09:58,160 --> 00:09:59,698
[ Purring ]
265
00:10:01,460 --> 00:10:02,426
[ Explosion ]
266
00:10:02,461 --> 00:10:03,493
Ha-ha-ha-ha!
[ Gunfire ]
267
00:10:03,528 --> 00:10:05,704
Looks like it's time
for a catnap.
268
00:10:05,739 --> 00:10:07,838
[ Snoopy laughs ]
269
00:10:07,873 --> 00:10:09,334
[ Gibberish ]
270
00:10:09,369 --> 00:10:12,271
♪
271
00:10:12,306 --> 00:10:13,272
[ Gunfire ]
272
00:10:13,307 --> 00:10:15,813
♪
273
00:10:15,848 --> 00:10:17,815
[ Gunfire ]
274
00:10:17,850 --> 00:10:19,245
Bwah!
275
00:10:20,677 --> 00:10:22,644
Auf weidersehen,
dummer hund.
276
00:10:22,679 --> 00:10:25,251
[ Gunfire ]
277
00:10:25,286 --> 00:10:27,088
[ Slurps ]
- Ugh! Aah!
278
00:10:27,123 --> 00:10:29,222
Doctor!
Get the hot water!
279
00:10:29,257 --> 00:10:30,553
Get the disinfectant!
280
00:10:30,588 --> 00:10:32,390
[ Gunfire ]
Get the iodine!
281
00:10:32,425 --> 00:10:33,897
Aah!
282
00:10:33,932 --> 00:10:35,459
Aaaaaaah!
283
00:10:36,935 --> 00:10:38,968
[ Upbeat music plays ]
284
00:10:39,003 --> 00:10:41,707
♪
285
00:10:47,946 --> 00:11:04,158
♪
18707
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