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1
00:00:08,108 --> 00:00:10,042
[ Theme music playing ]
2
00:00:10,710 --> 00:00:17,082
♪♪
3
00:00:17,117 --> 00:00:23,488
♪♪
4
00:00:23,523 --> 00:00:25,357
It's alive!
5
00:00:25,392 --> 00:00:34,499
♪♪
6
00:00:34,534 --> 00:00:43,642
♪♪
7
00:00:43,677 --> 00:00:47,546
Who watches the Watchmen?
8
00:00:47,581 --> 00:00:49,648
Heh...
Ah, shit, they're onto us!
9
00:00:49,683 --> 00:00:50,749
[ Rustles ]
10
00:00:50,784 --> 00:00:54,419
[ Pop music playing ]
11
00:00:54,454 --> 00:00:56,555
♪ If you're goin' to be
our lice host ♪
12
00:00:56,590 --> 00:00:58,390
♪ We're going to latch
onto your head ♪
13
00:00:58,425 --> 00:01:00,659
♪ This one belongs to Jessica ♪
14
00:01:00,694 --> 00:01:03,028
♪ And she just turned ten ♪
15
00:01:03,063 --> 00:01:05,497
♪ Lice breed
in close proximity ♪
16
00:01:05,532 --> 00:01:07,466
♪ We multiply with ease ♪
17
00:01:07,501 --> 00:01:09,668
♪ She picked us up
in the ball pit ♪
18
00:01:09,703 --> 00:01:11,937
♪ At a local Chuck E. Cheese ♪
19
00:01:11,972 --> 00:01:14,673
♪ So, here's the deal
on parasites, baby ♪
20
00:01:14,708 --> 00:01:16,652
♪ It's really hard to get rid of
her and her and me ♪
21
00:01:16,676 --> 00:01:18,543
♪ Got nits on the root,
laying eggs to boot ♪
22
00:01:18,578 --> 00:01:20,846
♪ Got bugs in your rug from
a dirty fella's nugs ♪
23
00:01:20,881 --> 00:01:22,614
♪ Use shampoo,
you better rinse, repeat ♪
24
00:01:22,649 --> 00:01:24,649
♪ Look at me, ha-ha,
I'm in the laundry ♪
25
00:01:24,684 --> 00:01:25,995
- Lice Girls!
- You are never going to
26
00:01:26,019 --> 00:01:27,986
Chuck E. Cheese ever again.
27
00:01:28,021 --> 00:01:31,056
What do you think we abducted
this time, Zandar?
28
00:01:31,091 --> 00:01:33,859
I dunno, Zortex, probably
another cow or farmer.
29
00:01:33,894 --> 00:01:37,029
Whatever it is,
get ready for probes city!
30
00:01:38,298 --> 00:01:39,965
[ Roaring ]
31
00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:41,733
Oh, fuck!
Oh, fuck!
32
00:01:41,768 --> 00:01:43,802
Aah!
33
00:01:43,837 --> 00:01:45,604
[ Screaming ]
34
00:01:45,639 --> 00:01:47,639
[ Splat ]
35
00:01:47,674 --> 00:01:49,774
I regret everything!
36
00:01:49,809 --> 00:01:54,813
[ Roaring ]
37
00:01:54,848 --> 00:01:55,881
[ Beeping ]
38
00:01:55,916 --> 00:01:58,483
[ Warbling ]
39
00:01:58,518 --> 00:02:01,186
Courage sure looks relaxed.
40
00:02:01,221 --> 00:02:02,420
Ahh.
41
00:02:02,455 --> 00:02:04,456
Oh, how many Prozac
did you give him?
42
00:02:04,491 --> 00:02:06,158
Enough.
43
00:02:06,193 --> 00:02:08,160
Oh!
[ Roaring ]
44
00:02:08,195 --> 00:02:10,395
Stupid dog!
Help us!
45
00:02:10,430 --> 00:02:12,564
He can't! The Prozac!
46
00:02:12,599 --> 00:02:14,166
That's gonna leave a mark!
47
00:02:14,201 --> 00:02:15,300
Oh, my!
48
00:02:15,335 --> 00:02:17,702
Ah!
Stupid Prozac!
49
00:02:17,737 --> 00:02:20,272
[ Courage sighs contentedly ]
50
00:02:20,307 --> 00:02:22,841
♪ I've been a bad, bad dog ♪
51
00:02:22,876 --> 00:02:24,809
♪ Bad dog ♪
52
00:02:24,844 --> 00:02:28,313
♪ I've been a careless
man's best friend ♪
53
00:02:28,348 --> 00:02:30,715
- ♪ Woof ♪
- ♪ Oh ♪
54
00:02:30,750 --> 00:02:32,984
So I said we should all pitch in
on a coffee maker,
55
00:02:33,019 --> 00:02:35,220
since we all enjoy coffee.
Coffee maker?
56
00:02:35,255 --> 00:02:36,755
That's what I said.
[ Squeaking ]
57
00:02:36,790 --> 00:02:37,722
It's General Leia!
58
00:02:37,757 --> 00:02:39,090
She's right outside
the window!
59
00:02:39,125 --> 00:02:41,393
Move the ship!
We need to help her inside!
60
00:02:41,428 --> 00:02:43,028
I hear we might
get a coffee maker.
61
00:02:43,063 --> 00:02:45,530
Well, it makes sense.
We all enjoy coffee.
62
00:02:45,565 --> 00:02:46,965
[ Thud ]
Oh, my God!
63
00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:48,733
Man: Damn it,
we got to catch up to her!
64
00:02:48,768 --> 00:02:49,901
Man: Pull up alongside her,
65
00:02:49,936 --> 00:02:51,314
we can pull her through
the side door.
66
00:02:51,338 --> 00:02:53,004
Man: Yeah, let's open
the door to space!
67
00:02:53,039 --> 00:02:55,307
That should have
no consequences.
68
00:02:55,342 --> 00:02:58,009
I can't reach her.
Turn the ship.
69
00:02:58,044 --> 00:02:59,911
Aah, no,
that was too fast!
70
00:02:59,946 --> 00:03:01,646
[ Thudding ]
71
00:03:01,681 --> 00:03:03,515
She's coming back!
Turn the ship again!
72
00:03:03,550 --> 00:03:06,051
♪♪
73
00:03:06,086 --> 00:03:10,288
Come on, come on,
almost there, come on.
74
00:03:10,323 --> 00:03:12,457
Yay!
Excited cheering!
75
00:03:12,492 --> 00:03:14,159
What did I miss?
76
00:03:14,194 --> 00:03:16,061
We're getting a coffee maker!
77
00:03:16,096 --> 00:03:17,429
[ Shopkeeper's bell rings ]
78
00:03:17,464 --> 00:03:20,398
Ah, Squall Leonhart,
I heard you were coming to town,
79
00:03:20,433 --> 00:03:23,602
but I didn't dare dream
you'd walk into my humble store!
80
00:03:23,637 --> 00:03:26,171
I am always looking for new
and unusual weapons.
81
00:03:26,206 --> 00:03:29,574
For you see, I'm the master
of... zapow!
82
00:03:29,609 --> 00:03:31,643
The gun blade!
83
00:03:31,678 --> 00:03:33,878
Cuts like a sword,
and when I pull the trigger,
84
00:03:33,913 --> 00:03:36,481
it vibrates extra hard...
bzzt!
85
00:03:36,516 --> 00:03:40,151
Inflicting super mega damage
on my foes!
86
00:03:40,186 --> 00:03:43,121
I doubt you have anything
for sale as cool as this.
87
00:03:43,156 --> 00:03:44,389
Ah, don't be so sure...
88
00:03:44,424 --> 00:03:45,890
[ Crash, roaring ]
89
00:03:45,925 --> 00:03:48,159
Aah! Aah!
Fuckin' bear!
90
00:03:48,194 --> 00:03:50,695
Oh, Goddamnit, ahh!
[ Vibrating ]
91
00:03:50,730 --> 00:03:52,931
[ Munch, squelches ]
92
00:03:52,966 --> 00:03:55,166
[ Roars, hatch squeaks
and thuds ]
93
00:03:55,201 --> 00:03:56,968
[ Whooshing ]
94
00:03:57,003 --> 00:04:00,205
Ugh, all right, Neo, you can
make your one phone call.
95
00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:01,740
Thank you.
96
00:04:01,775 --> 00:04:05,477
Connection, disappearing.
Hey!
97
00:04:05,512 --> 00:04:09,147
♪ I'm only a bill,
yes, simply a bill ♪
98
00:04:09,182 --> 00:04:10,682
Whoa!
Wow.
99
00:04:10,717 --> 00:04:12,128
Stealing the Declaration
of Independence
100
00:04:12,152 --> 00:04:13,752
was easier than I thought.
101
00:04:13,787 --> 00:04:16,588
It's inside, you idiot!
102
00:04:16,623 --> 00:04:19,024
Now, where did that
little anthropomorphic
103
00:04:19,059 --> 00:04:20,759
rolled up piece of paper go?
104
00:04:20,794 --> 00:04:24,296
Wait, was it never here?
Am I having an acid flashback?
105
00:04:24,331 --> 00:04:27,532
Oh, my God, I'm freaking out!
This stupid Prozac!
106
00:04:27,567 --> 00:04:31,236
[ Screaming ]
107
00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:32,370
[ Blade rings, bear roars ]
108
00:04:32,405 --> 00:04:33,905
[ Sword vibrating,
man screaming ]
109
00:04:33,940 --> 00:04:35,340
[ Roar, munch ]
110
00:04:35,375 --> 00:04:38,243
[ Grunting, sword vibrating ]
111
00:04:38,278 --> 00:04:43,281
[ Cartoony sound effects ]
112
00:04:43,316 --> 00:04:45,550
I am the terror that
quack in the night!
113
00:04:45,585 --> 00:04:48,019
I am the poison ivy rash
on the nuts
114
00:04:48,054 --> 00:04:49,888
that ruined your hunting trip!
115
00:04:49,923 --> 00:04:51,690
Now that Darkwing Duck
is here...
116
00:04:51,725 --> 00:04:53,625
[ Gunshot ]
Jesus! Gah, what the...
117
00:04:53,660 --> 00:04:56,995
[ Groaning ]
118
00:04:57,030 --> 00:04:58,563
[ Gunshot ]
119
00:04:58,598 --> 00:05:00,565
Flapping ineffectively...
I'm a duck!
120
00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:02,300
Why the hell can't I
get out of here?!
121
00:05:02,335 --> 00:05:05,003
Gah, shoulder hit!
Highly survivable.
122
00:05:05,038 --> 00:05:07,138
Okay, D.W.,
ready to hit the road?
123
00:05:07,173 --> 00:05:08,373
[ Gunshot ]
Aah!
124
00:05:08,408 --> 00:05:10,375
Launchpad, is that you?
125
00:05:10,410 --> 00:05:11,876
[ Gunshot ]
Oh, God, why?!
126
00:05:11,911 --> 00:05:13,545
Uncle Scrooge?
Aah!
127
00:05:13,580 --> 00:05:15,046
Dewey!
[ Gunshot ]
128
00:05:15,081 --> 00:05:19,217
♪♪
129
00:05:19,252 --> 00:05:21,319
Greetings, viewers!
130
00:05:21,354 --> 00:05:23,288
You may call me the Lookie-Loo,
131
00:05:23,323 --> 00:05:25,256
for that is my name.
132
00:05:25,291 --> 00:05:28,693
I have transported you
to my battle dome
133
00:05:28,728 --> 00:05:31,996
on the planet Iowyo.
134
00:05:32,031 --> 00:05:35,166
[ Roaring, flames roar ]
135
00:05:35,201 --> 00:05:37,836
This is Fang Banger!
136
00:05:37,871 --> 00:05:39,938
He will soon destroy
your planet.
137
00:05:39,973 --> 00:05:44,008
Only Earth's strongest
can hope to stop him.
138
00:05:44,043 --> 00:05:47,679
But who is your
mightiest super team?
139
00:05:47,714 --> 00:05:52,917
Let the Secret Infinity Contest
of Crisis Champions begin!
140
00:05:52,952 --> 00:05:57,689
♪ Secret Infinity Contest of
Motherfuckin' Crisis Champions ♪
141
00:05:57,724 --> 00:06:00,759
♪ Cha-cha-cha Cheese League,
Cheese League, baby! ♪
142
00:06:00,794 --> 00:06:03,661
Colby!
The leader and the brain!
143
00:06:03,696 --> 00:06:06,331
Cheddar!
He's straight up making it rain!
144
00:06:06,366 --> 00:06:09,100
Brie! Sexy mama
with a Southern sass!
145
00:06:09,135 --> 00:06:12,070
Muenster! Buff and handsome,
bustin' ass!
146
00:06:12,105 --> 00:06:14,706
And don't forget about
Baby Swiss!
147
00:06:14,741 --> 00:06:18,376
♪ Baby! Cha-cha-cha-cha-cha
Cheese League! ♪
148
00:06:18,411 --> 00:06:20,912
♪ Squatch Squad, Squatch Squad ♪
149
00:06:20,947 --> 00:06:23,782
♪ come get your crotch gnawed
by the Squatch Squad ♪
150
00:06:23,817 --> 00:06:24,916
Bigfoot!
151
00:06:24,951 --> 00:06:26,551
Peace on Earth is his goal!
152
00:06:26,586 --> 00:06:27,719
Spacesquatch!
153
00:06:27,754 --> 00:06:29,120
He's comin' for
your black hole!
154
00:06:29,155 --> 00:06:30,355
Batsquatch!
155
00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:31,956
Echolocates with sonar!
156
00:06:31,991 --> 00:06:34,559
- Skunk Ape!
- He's got a stinky faux-nar!
157
00:06:34,594 --> 00:06:35,727
Sheep Squatch!
158
00:06:35,762 --> 00:06:37,262
Don't you call him a lamb!
159
00:06:37,297 --> 00:06:39,697
- Blurryfoot!
- Never caught on cam!
160
00:06:39,732 --> 00:06:43,034
♪ Squatch Squad, baby,
Squatch Squad! ♪
161
00:06:43,069 --> 00:06:46,571
♪ Road Hawgs, grab a cheese log
and roll these dawgs ♪
162
00:06:46,606 --> 00:06:48,239
♪ They're the Road Hawgs ♪
163
00:06:48,274 --> 00:06:50,442
- Man Pig!
- More man than pig!
164
00:06:50,477 --> 00:06:52,977
- Pig Man!
- Favorite Newton fig!
165
00:06:53,012 --> 00:06:55,146
- Flank!
- Favorite Campbell knee!
166
00:06:55,181 --> 00:06:57,148
And don't forget about Steve!
167
00:06:57,183 --> 00:07:00,885
♪ Road Hawgs, up your fucking
ass with Road Hawgs! ♪
168
00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:04,622
♪ Hang on to your ass, here
comes Bigfoot in Bigfoot! ♪
169
00:07:04,657 --> 00:07:06,825
♪ One's a beast
and one's a truck ♪
170
00:07:06,860 --> 00:07:10,862
♪ Yes, we know you already saw
Bigfoot on that other team ♪
171
00:07:10,897 --> 00:07:12,464
♪ But this one's different! ♪
172
00:07:12,499 --> 00:07:14,532
♪ Bigfoot in Bigfoot! ♪
173
00:07:14,567 --> 00:07:17,168
♪ You won't get chiseled by
the Marble Mob ♪
174
00:07:17,203 --> 00:07:19,871
♪ Gettin' their rocks off
on the job ♪
175
00:07:19,906 --> 00:07:22,640
♪ Marble Mob, Marble Mob ♪
176
00:07:22,675 --> 00:07:24,709
- David!
- A straight-up masterpiece!
177
00:07:24,744 --> 00:07:26,244
- Venus de Milo!
- Don't need arms
178
00:07:26,279 --> 00:07:27,745
to bitch-slap your niece!
179
00:07:27,780 --> 00:07:30,081
- The Thinker.
- He's gonna blow your mind!
180
00:07:30,116 --> 00:07:32,851
- Manneken Pis!
- His pee will make you blind!
181
00:07:32,886 --> 00:07:35,820
- Abe Lincoln!
- He invented basketball?
182
00:07:35,855 --> 00:07:37,622
♪ Marble Mob,
don't be a slob ♪
183
00:07:37,657 --> 00:07:42,560
♪ You idiotic knob-job, get down
with the Marble Mob! ♪
184
00:07:42,595 --> 00:07:44,963
Now then,
185
00:07:44,998 --> 00:07:47,365
the tournament grid
will be divided thusly.
186
00:07:47,400 --> 00:07:51,002
Warning, warning, oxygen levels
approaching fatal minimums.
187
00:07:51,037 --> 00:07:52,637
[ Grunts ]
188
00:07:52,672 --> 00:07:55,907
[ Alarm blaring ]
189
00:07:55,942 --> 00:07:57,275
Baa!
[ Gunshot ]
190
00:07:57,310 --> 00:07:59,811
[ Alarm blaring ]
191
00:07:59,846 --> 00:08:02,180
Sorry, the Fang Banger will
definitely eat
192
00:08:02,215 --> 00:08:03,348
the entire earth now.
193
00:08:03,383 --> 00:08:05,049
We gave it
the old college try, though.
194
00:08:05,084 --> 00:08:06,551
That's what's important.
195
00:08:06,586 --> 00:08:07,852
Peace out, yo!
196
00:08:07,887 --> 00:08:09,587
[ Beeping ]
197
00:08:09,622 --> 00:08:10,922
Fuckin' bear!
198
00:08:10,957 --> 00:08:14,259
[ Roaring ]
199
00:08:14,294 --> 00:08:17,462
Bored with the same old Easter?
Yeah!
200
00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:20,298
Resurrection of Christ
not holding their attention?
201
00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:21,900
It sure isn't!
202
00:08:21,935 --> 00:08:24,836
Now Easter can really
get hoppin'!
203
00:08:24,871 --> 00:08:26,971
God sacrificed his only son,
204
00:08:27,006 --> 00:08:29,807
so you won't have
to sacrifice the fun.
205
00:08:29,842 --> 00:08:31,543
Mom and Dad love to hop,
206
00:08:31,578 --> 00:08:33,811
even Grandma just can't stop!
207
00:08:33,846 --> 00:08:37,982
The Jesus Pogo Sticks
commercial aired to
208
00:08:38,017 --> 00:08:40,151
a world wide
Super Bowl audience.
209
00:08:40,186 --> 00:08:43,354
And at that precise moment,
the rapture began.
210
00:08:43,389 --> 00:08:46,391
God could take no more.
211
00:08:46,859 --> 00:08:49,894
[ Adventure music ]
212
00:08:49,929 --> 00:08:51,396
Mind control tigers?
213
00:08:51,431 --> 00:08:53,998
You're usually more of
a snake guy.
214
00:08:54,033 --> 00:08:58,870
I know, but my exotic animal guy
had a deal on tigers
215
00:08:58,905 --> 00:09:01,072
I couldn't pass-ss up.
216
00:09:03,076 --> 00:09:05,643
We can't go hand-to-hand
with tigers, Duke!
217
00:09:05,678 --> 00:09:07,056
We're not trained
to deal with them!
218
00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:08,780
Luckily, we have someone
who is...
219
00:09:08,815 --> 00:09:11,449
I'd like to introduce our newest
recruit... everyone, meet
220
00:09:11,484 --> 00:09:14,652
Joe-e-e Exotic!
221
00:09:14,687 --> 00:09:16,654
Howdy, Joes, y'all,
we're looking for someone
222
00:09:16,689 --> 00:09:19,691
who knows how to handle tigers
and gaslight two meth addicted
223
00:09:19,726 --> 00:09:21,559
husbands,
you've got a bull's eye.
224
00:09:21,594 --> 00:09:23,361
Okay, let's get to
that machine
225
00:09:23,396 --> 00:09:25,763
and destroy it
before it's too late.
226
00:09:25,798 --> 00:09:28,499
Yo, Joe!
227
00:09:28,534 --> 00:09:30,001
Here we go, attack, hut, hut!
228
00:09:30,036 --> 00:09:31,069
We're under attack!
229
00:09:31,104 --> 00:09:33,271
Mind control button push!
230
00:09:33,306 --> 00:09:35,206
[ Sinister laugh ]
231
00:09:35,241 --> 00:09:38,509
Tigers, kill all the Joes!
232
00:09:38,544 --> 00:09:40,411
[ Roaring ]
233
00:09:40,446 --> 00:09:41,980
The tigers are coming!
234
00:09:42,015 --> 00:09:44,182
Aah!
My arm!
235
00:09:44,217 --> 00:09:46,050
Go, go, go.
Flank 'em to the right!
236
00:09:46,085 --> 00:09:48,152
Flank 'em to the left!
Oh!
237
00:09:48,187 --> 00:09:50,622
You gotta...
you gotta do something!
238
00:09:50,657 --> 00:09:52,023
[ Playing Country tune ]
239
00:09:52,058 --> 00:09:54,092
♪ Hey, Cobra kitties ♪
240
00:09:54,127 --> 00:09:58,062
♪ Fuckin' papa's
gonna sing you a song ♪
241
00:09:58,097 --> 00:09:59,797
♪ Hey, Cobra kitties ♪
242
00:09:59,832 --> 00:10:04,102
♪ Can't we all just get along? ♪
243
00:10:04,137 --> 00:10:06,771
♪ Hey, Cobra kitties ♪
- Aah! Cobra kitties!
244
00:10:06,806 --> 00:10:09,207
♪ It's time to let Cobra go ♪
245
00:10:09,242 --> 00:10:12,677
♪ Hey, Cobra kitties ♪
246
00:10:12,712 --> 00:10:16,381
♪ It's time to be a G.I. Joe ♪
247
00:10:16,416 --> 00:10:19,550
Way to go, Exotic... now it's
you who controls the tigers!
248
00:10:19,585 --> 00:10:21,419
Girl, I've always controlled
these tigers.
249
00:10:21,454 --> 00:10:23,921
Kill that fucking Cobra asshole!
250
00:10:23,956 --> 00:10:25,690
Oh! Run away!
251
00:10:25,725 --> 00:10:29,627
Somebody stop
these stupid cats!
252
00:10:29,662 --> 00:10:31,829
Oh! Oh! Run away!
253
00:10:31,864 --> 00:10:33,431
Way to go, Joe!
254
00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:36,934
How do you get that tight
outfit on and can I watch?
255
00:10:36,969 --> 00:10:40,772
Look here, Carol, this machine
you sold me doesn't work.
256
00:10:40,807 --> 00:10:43,274
What happened
to the Baskin guarantee?
257
00:10:43,309 --> 00:10:46,944
Well, cats and kittens,
it worked on my husband.
258
00:10:46,979 --> 00:10:49,480
It should work just fine.
259
00:10:49,515 --> 00:10:51,315
Oh, my God.
She admitted it.
260
00:10:51,350 --> 00:10:52,350
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
261
00:10:52,385 --> 00:10:53,651
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
262
00:10:53,686 --> 00:10:55,553
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk
wawk bawk bawk ♪
263
00:10:55,588 --> 00:10:56,721
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
264
00:10:56,756 --> 00:10:58,056
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
265
00:10:58,091 --> 00:10:59,891
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk
wawk bawk bawk ♪
266
00:10:59,926 --> 00:11:00,892
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
267
00:11:00,927 --> 00:11:02,293
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
268
00:11:02,328 --> 00:11:04,295
♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk
wawk bawk bawk ♪
269
00:11:04,330 --> 00:11:06,498
Ba-gawk! Bawk.
270
00:11:09,168 --> 00:11:10,502
Stoopid Monkey.
19223
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