Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:19,061 --> 00:00:20,583
It's alive!
2
00:00:39,063 --> 00:00:41,154
Kids, I've enlisted the help of
some rappers
3
00:00:41,230 --> 00:00:43,423
I've found on
the Craig's List to explain
4
00:00:43,496 --> 00:00:45,520
Einstein's theory of relativity.
5
00:00:45,597 --> 00:00:48,324
So come on in guys.
This is the class.
6
00:00:52,998 --> 00:00:53,985
# I'm E, what up #
7
00:00:54,064 --> 00:00:55,360
# And I'm MC Square #
8
00:00:55,431 --> 00:00:57,261
# We came to rhyme and
we came prepared #
9
00:00:57,331 --> 00:00:59,524
# Yo, I like this beat that you're
giving me #
10
00:00:59,598 --> 00:01:01,996
# Now tell me
the theory of relativity #
11
00:01:02,066 --> 00:01:03,928
# E stands for energy,
sucker fool #
12
00:01:03,998 --> 00:01:06,487
# It's not measured in watts bitch,
it's measured in joules #
13
00:01:06,565 --> 00:01:08,292
# But listen up class,
the M is for mass #
14
00:01:08,365 --> 00:01:10,696
# And if you don't like it you
can kiss my ass #
15
00:01:10,766 --> 00:01:12,664
# The C stands for speed of
light in a vacuum #
16
00:01:12,733 --> 00:01:14,755
# So back up hoes and give us
some room #
17
00:01:14,833 --> 00:01:16,855
# And the theory of mass
requires rest energy #
18
00:01:16,932 --> 00:01:17,762
# Without a hitch #
19
00:01:17,833 --> 00:01:19,322
# Which made Newton's second law
that appears #
20
00:01:19,400 --> 00:01:22,162
# That nonrelative class
mechanics, bitch #
21
00:01:26,167 --> 00:01:28,962
Einstein mother fucker!
22
00:01:29,968 --> 00:01:32,594
Yo! We also got one about
algebra!
23
00:01:32,668 --> 00:01:37,862
Yeah, yeah, A squared times B
squared equals these nuts, bitch!
24
00:01:43,503 --> 00:01:44,968
Ow, oh
Ow, oh.
25
00:01:45,036 --> 00:01:47,003
Uh, those things are anus
shattering.
26
00:01:47,069 --> 00:01:48,263
Uh, uh, uh!
27
00:01:48,337 --> 00:01:50,632
Over heated again?
28
00:01:50,703 --> 00:01:53,134
You cheap little rice burner
piece of crap!
29
00:01:53,203 --> 00:01:55,169
Come on, come on,
come on, come on.
30
00:01:55,237 --> 00:01:58,204
Oh, yeah!
That's a weird traffic marking.
31
00:01:58,271 --> 00:02:01,135
Whoa!
Holy shit!
32
00:02:01,204 --> 00:02:03,102
Oh, oh, ugh!
33
00:02:03,171 --> 00:02:06,160
Ow!
I can't feel my legs.
34
00:02:06,238 --> 00:02:07,704
Oh, oh thank you.
35
00:02:07,772 --> 00:02:09,738
Oh, oh thank you.
Bless you.
36
00:02:09,805 --> 00:02:11,930
I need to go to a hospital.
37
00:02:12,005 --> 00:02:13,733
Oh thank you so much.
Thank you.
38
00:02:13,806 --> 00:02:17,897
Oh, ahh, oh!
Ahh!
39
00:02:17,972 --> 00:02:19,700
Mother fucking game!
40
00:02:20,240 --> 00:02:23,035
Uh-oh, my war injury's
acting up again.
41
00:02:24,206 --> 00:02:25,934
Do it again uncle Glen!
42
00:02:27,106 --> 00:02:28,129
Maybe later.
43
00:02:28,206 --> 00:02:30,570
Uncle Glen needs a beer.
44
00:02:32,241 --> 00:02:35,401
Ahh.
45
00:02:35,473 --> 00:02:36,837
What the...
Who are you?
46
00:02:36,907 --> 00:02:39,635
Removing your finger, that's a
good power uncle Glen.
47
00:02:39,708 --> 00:02:40,901
I must have it.
48
00:02:41,641 --> 00:02:44,506
Ahh!
49
00:02:48,442 --> 00:02:50,170
Kids, where's your uncle Glen?
50
00:02:50,242 --> 00:02:51,139
We don't know mama.
51
00:02:51,208 --> 00:02:52,232
He's gone.
52
00:02:52,309 --> 00:02:55,934
Uh, he must be having one of his
explosive diarrhea attacks again.
53
00:02:56,009 --> 00:02:57,033
Oh.
54
00:03:03,843 --> 00:03:05,571
Every once in a while this power
backfires.
55
00:03:07,310 --> 00:03:08,503
I can see!
56
00:03:08,577 --> 00:03:11,372
Oh Magoo,
you've done it again.
57
00:03:11,444 --> 00:03:13,876
What are all these dragons
made of metal...
58
00:03:30,212 --> 00:03:33,007
My goodness,
father what's that?
59
00:03:33,079 --> 00:03:35,637
It appears to be a jungle
dwelling ape man.
60
00:03:35,713 --> 00:03:36,542
Yeah, yeah, I know.
61
00:03:36,613 --> 00:03:37,806
I meant that!
62
00:03:37,880 --> 00:03:39,346
Oh, that's a penis.
63
00:03:39,414 --> 00:03:41,142
I think I like penis.
64
00:03:41,213 --> 00:03:43,180
Well...
you are your mother's daughter.
65
00:03:43,248 --> 00:03:44,975
Jane, me Jane.
66
00:03:45,048 --> 00:03:47,343
Jane!
67
00:03:47,415 --> 00:03:48,881
That's right, very good.
68
00:03:48,948 --> 00:03:53,903
Jane! Jane, Jane, ooh, ooh,
ooh Jane.
69
00:03:53,982 --> 00:03:55,709
Yes!
My name is Jane!
70
00:03:59,915 --> 00:04:01,711
Me save you!
71
00:04:07,016 --> 00:04:09,642
Tarzan, my hero.
72
00:04:09,717 --> 00:04:10,807
Growl
73
00:04:14,817 --> 00:04:17,283
Tarzan,
my hero.
74
00:04:18,450 --> 00:04:19,279
Ah!
75
00:04:38,719 --> 00:04:44,278
Oh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh.
Ahhh!
76
00:04:44,353 --> 00:04:47,376
Oh! Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh.
Uh, uh, uh, uh
77
00:04:52,754 --> 00:04:53,583
Ahh!
78
00:04:56,687 --> 00:04:59,153
Ahh!
79
00:04:59,221 --> 00:05:05,779
Uh, ah, oh!
Uh, ah, oh!
80
00:05:13,189 --> 00:05:14,212
Huh!
81
00:05:14,289 --> 00:05:17,813
Tarzan, don't move,
I'll go get you a doctor.
82
00:05:17,890 --> 00:05:22,948
No, Jane, humans bad.
Me no want doctor.
83
00:05:23,023 --> 00:05:25,683
Me no want Jane neither.
84
00:05:25,757 --> 00:05:27,746
You mean either, not...
85
00:05:27,824 --> 00:05:30,255
Me freaking ape man,
me no give crap!
86
00:05:31,425 --> 00:05:33,686
Tarzan never saw Jane again,
87
00:05:33,757 --> 00:05:36,781
his broken body was mended by
the best jungle medicine
88
00:05:36,858 --> 00:05:38,119
the apes could provide.
89
00:05:53,260 --> 00:05:54,283
Uh-oh!
90
00:05:58,660 --> 00:05:59,989
Hmm?
91
00:06:00,060 --> 00:06:02,185
I wonder where the ocean is
going.
92
00:06:02,660 --> 00:06:06,354
We the jury find the defendant,
delightful!
93
00:06:06,428 --> 00:06:08,156
Well thank you very much.
94
00:06:18,996 --> 00:06:21,121
I flossed and brushed
my teeth again.
95
00:06:21,195 --> 00:06:23,923
They say only floss the ones you
want to keep.
96
00:06:23,996 --> 00:06:25,621
I always liked that joke.
97
00:06:25,696 --> 00:06:27,821
Then I swished around some
mouth wash.
98
00:06:27,897 --> 00:06:29,920
Kills gingivitis.
99
00:06:29,997 --> 00:06:32,122
Damn gingivitis.
100
00:06:32,197 --> 00:06:33,924
Leading cause of gum disease.
101
00:06:33,997 --> 00:06:37,191
Saw an old lady trying to cross
the street.
102
00:06:37,264 --> 00:06:39,992
Grandma couldn't have been less
than 90 years old.
103
00:06:40,065 --> 00:06:42,031
Probably seen a lot over those
years.
104
00:06:42,098 --> 00:06:46,292
Lots of stories to tell and a
family that loves her.
105
00:06:46,365 --> 00:06:48,331
Let me help you out granny.
106
00:06:48,399 --> 00:06:51,558
Stopped the cars to make sure
granny could cross.
107
00:06:51,632 --> 00:06:52,825
I'm walking here!
108
00:06:52,899 --> 00:06:54,365
I love that line.
109
00:06:55,733 --> 00:06:58,756
Then I saw some pussy that made
my heart stop.
110
00:06:58,832 --> 00:07:00,957
Pussy was caught up in the tree.
111
00:07:01,032 --> 00:07:02,760
A kid crying for it.
112
00:07:02,833 --> 00:07:05,856
Poor kid, probably not old
enough to tie his shoe
113
00:07:05,933 --> 00:07:09,025
and his damn kitten's life is in
my hands.
114
00:07:09,101 --> 00:07:10,362
Here ya go buddy.
115
00:07:10,435 --> 00:07:13,367
Tipped the barista five bucks for
my soy latte.
116
00:07:13,435 --> 00:07:16,662
These lattes are good.
Good enough to kill for.
117
00:07:16,735 --> 00:07:18,201
But I'd never do that.
118
00:07:18,268 --> 00:07:20,826
Killing is bad, unless you're
killing gingivitis.
119
00:07:30,736 --> 00:07:33,362
18, 19, and 20.
120
00:07:33,436 --> 00:07:34,630
Or one score.
121
00:07:34,702 --> 00:07:37,896
Getting a good ass kicking
in here.
122
00:07:37,969 --> 00:07:40,993
Hey Robert E. Lee, where do you
think you're going?
123
00:07:41,071 --> 00:07:44,901
We still have 3 score and 7
kicks to the balls to go.
124
00:07:44,970 --> 00:07:45,799
Ugh!
125
00:07:48,704 --> 00:07:50,170
This is a robbery!
126
00:07:50,237 --> 00:07:52,965
Fill this bag with
inconsequential bills.
127
00:07:53,038 --> 00:07:55,163
Wow, I'm getting robbed by
Nicole Richie...
128
00:07:55,238 --> 00:07:56,430
Shh!
Shut up!
129
00:07:56,505 --> 00:07:59,369
I want to go to prison to save
my friend Paris.
130
00:07:59,439 --> 00:08:01,927
For a robbery, they might just
fine you for that.
131
00:08:02,005 --> 00:08:03,029
Good point.
132
00:08:04,839 --> 00:08:07,737
Stupid celebrity,
armed robbery and murder?
133
00:08:07,806 --> 00:08:09,670
You'll be locked up for 45 days!
134
00:08:10,706 --> 00:08:12,172
Am I locked up?
135
00:08:12,240 --> 00:08:14,365
Perhaps it is you
who are locked up
136
00:08:14,441 --> 00:08:16,100
and I am truly free.
137
00:08:16,174 --> 00:08:18,072
Shut up you bitch!
Get out of my head!
138
00:08:18,140 --> 00:08:19,867
Ahh!
She's in my brain!
139
00:08:19,941 --> 00:08:20,963
Nicole, is that you?
140
00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:21,869
Paris!
141
00:08:21,940 --> 00:08:25,270
I couldn't let my best bud/ meal
ticket rot in jail.
142
00:08:25,340 --> 00:08:26,806
Now could I?
Wink.
143
00:08:26,874 --> 00:08:28,840
But now we're both locked up.
144
00:08:28,908 --> 00:08:32,363
Don't worry, I have an escape
plan tattooed on me.
145
00:08:32,442 --> 00:08:33,907
I recognize those symbols.
146
00:08:33,974 --> 00:08:35,168
They're words Paris.
147
00:08:35,241 --> 00:08:36,265
What?
148
00:08:36,342 --> 00:08:37,534
Oh yes!
149
00:08:37,608 --> 00:08:39,574
Oh yeah, give it to me!
150
00:08:39,642 --> 00:08:45,598
Oh yeah, you're the right guard!
Yeah! Yeah!
151
00:08:45,676 --> 00:08:48,870
Yeah, unlock my cell!
My vagina cell!
152
00:08:48,943 --> 00:08:49,966
Yeah!
153
00:08:50,043 --> 00:08:53,134
Oh! That was great ladies, but
you got to go right back into...
154
00:08:53,210 --> 00:08:54,233
Oh!
155
00:08:55,411 --> 00:09:00,900
Agh!
156
00:09:03,044 --> 00:09:05,169
Hey, I forgot to use the poison.
157
00:09:06,746 --> 00:09:09,075
Why does that keep happening to all
my boyfriends?
158
00:09:09,145 --> 00:09:11,111
You should really see a
gynecologist.
159
00:09:11,179 --> 00:09:12,577
TV Announcer:
We now cancel Caveman
160
00:09:12,646 --> 00:09:14,669
to bring you breaking news from
Lynn Wood prison
161
00:09:14,746 --> 00:09:17,211
noted celebutards Paris Hilton
and Nicole Richie
162
00:09:17,279 --> 00:09:18,337
have escaped.
163
00:09:18,413 --> 00:09:21,140
Viewers will recall that
Nicole Richie is the daughter
164
00:09:21,213 --> 00:09:22,940
of famous musician
Lionel Richie.
165
00:09:29,680 --> 00:09:32,704
Nicole, it is over!
You've got nowhere left to run!
166
00:09:32,780 --> 00:09:34,246
The joke's on you!
167
00:09:34,314 --> 00:09:37,338
I weigh 62 pounds,
I can glide through the air!
168
00:09:37,415 --> 00:09:38,880
Like a spider monkey!
169
00:09:38,948 --> 00:09:40,607
Up! Up! And away Falkor!
170
00:09:40,681 --> 00:09:41,545
No!
171
00:09:41,615 --> 00:09:44,172
Yeah!
172
00:09:52,715 --> 00:09:55,739
Hmm, I could really go for
another one of those.
173
00:09:55,817 --> 00:09:57,544
Where is our cabana boy?
174
00:09:59,149 --> 00:10:01,548
Paris!
175
00:10:01,617 --> 00:10:04,810
Oops! I did it again.
With my vagina.
176
00:10:04,883 --> 00:10:06,350
Laughing makes me hungry.
177
00:10:06,950 --> 00:10:08,883
# Ba-bawk bawk bawk #
# Ba-bawk bawk bawk #
178
00:10:08,951 --> 00:10:10,917
# Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk
bawk bawk #
179
00:10:10,984 --> 00:10:13,143
# Ba-bawk bawk bawk #
# Ba-bawk bawk bawk #
180
00:10:13,218 --> 00:10:15,207
# Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk
bawk bawk #
181
00:10:15,285 --> 00:10:17,410
# Ba-bawk bawk bawk #
# Ba-bawk bawk bawk #
182
00:10:17,485 --> 00:10:19,542
# Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk
bawk bawk #
183
00:10:19,618 --> 00:10:21,346
Ba-gawk! Bawk.
12683
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
