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1
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[ thunder crashing ]
[ drilling, sawing ]
2
00:00:16,049 --> 00:00:26,025
[ electricity crackling ]
>> it's alive!
3
00:00:26,092 --> 00:00:38,304
[ electricity crackling ]
>> it's alive!
4
00:00:38,371 --> 00:00:39,038
>> ugh!
5
00:00:39,105 --> 00:00:41,207
This food nasa sent up is crap.
6
00:00:41,274 --> 00:00:42,909
>> yep, but I got an idea.
7
00:00:42,976 --> 00:00:44,577
Hey, kool-aid!
8
00:00:44,644 --> 00:00:46,045
>> oh, yeah!
9
00:00:46,112 --> 00:00:47,280
>> aaahhh!
10
00:00:47,347 --> 00:00:49,449
[ beeping ]
>> [ humming ]
11
00:00:55,822 --> 00:00:57,390
Yeah, there we go.
12
00:00:57,457 --> 00:00:59,426
I am a potato.
13
00:00:59,492 --> 00:01:02,262
>> encyclopedia brown is on the
Case!
14
00:01:02,328 --> 00:01:03,129
Aha!
15
00:01:03,196 --> 00:01:05,165
Miss september has implants.
16
00:01:05,230 --> 00:01:06,199
>> I swear, hazel.
17
00:01:06,266 --> 00:01:08,268
I don't know what to do with
That man.
18
00:01:08,334 --> 00:01:10,937
He just won't ask his boss for a
Raise.
19
00:01:11,004 --> 00:01:13,473
When I married roger, he had
Such balls.
20
00:01:13,539 --> 00:01:14,941
Where did his balls go?
21
00:01:15,008 --> 00:01:16,276
>> dad's balls are missing?
22
00:01:16,342 --> 00:01:18,144
[ gasps ]
A mystery!
23
00:01:18,211 --> 00:01:19,579
>> brown!
24
00:01:19,646 --> 00:01:22,549
You really screwed up these
Figures again!
25
00:01:22,615 --> 00:01:23,283
>> yes, sir.
26
00:01:23,349 --> 00:01:24,818
>> who has [bleep] For brains?
27
00:01:24,884 --> 00:01:25,285
>> me.
28
00:01:25,351 --> 00:01:26,152
>> what's that?
29
00:01:26,219 --> 00:01:26,753
>> I do.
30
00:01:26,820 --> 00:01:28,054
I have [bleep] For brains.
31
00:01:28,121 --> 00:01:28,988
>> that's better.
32
00:01:29,055 --> 00:01:31,257
>> hmm...
33
00:01:31,324 --> 00:01:33,993
>> [ sobbing ]
>> wow.
34
00:01:34,060 --> 00:01:37,964
I've been a bartender 18 years
And never seen anyone cry actual
35
00:01:38,031 --> 00:01:39,432
Tears into their beer.
36
00:01:39,499 --> 00:01:41,601
Kudos, chum.
37
00:01:41,668 --> 00:01:43,436
>> thanks.
38
00:01:43,503 --> 00:01:45,238
>> mm-hmm.
39
00:01:45,305 --> 00:01:47,307
[ dance music plays ]
>> [ laughs nervously ]
40
00:01:54,314 --> 00:01:57,250
Strippers always get so mad when
You assume they're hookers.
41
00:01:57,317 --> 00:01:59,652
>> well, I definitely am one.
42
00:02:02,388 --> 00:02:03,356
>> mm-hmm.
43
00:02:03,423 --> 00:02:04,891
Aha!
44
00:02:07,060 --> 00:02:10,396
>> you know, in the rest of the
World, soccer is called
45
00:02:10,463 --> 00:02:11,131
Football.
46
00:02:11,197 --> 00:02:12,499
Hey! Hey!
47
00:02:12,565 --> 00:02:13,266
Ow!
48
00:02:13,333 --> 00:02:14,534
Ohh!
49
00:02:14,601 --> 00:02:15,468
What's going on?
50
00:02:15,535 --> 00:02:17,603
Why are you touching --
>> hello, there.
51
00:02:17,670 --> 00:02:20,473
What you've just seen is a
Dramatization of the new asshole
52
00:02:20,540 --> 00:02:23,376
Laws enacted by congress, which
Go into effect january 1st.
53
00:02:23,443 --> 00:02:26,478
It's now a federal offense to
Point out that soccer is
54
00:02:26,546 --> 00:02:28,348
Actually called football.
55
00:02:28,414 --> 00:02:31,784
>> uh, in fact, no "Star trek"
Episode contains the words "Beam
56
00:02:31,851 --> 00:02:32,752
Me up, scotty."
57
00:02:32,819 --> 00:02:33,186
Aah!
58
00:02:33,253 --> 00:02:33,686
Ouch!
59
00:02:33,753 --> 00:02:34,487
Ow! My arm.
60
00:02:34,554 --> 00:02:35,188
Aah! Aah!
61
00:02:35,255 --> 00:02:37,624
Ow!
62
00:02:37,690 --> 00:02:42,428
>> you know, iceland is actually
Green, and greenland is actually
63
00:02:42,495 --> 00:02:43,029
Icy?
64
00:02:43,096 --> 00:02:43,763
Aah!
65
00:02:43,829 --> 00:02:44,864
Aah! Aah!
66
00:02:44,930 --> 00:02:48,268
Oh, help me, help me, help!
67
00:02:48,334 --> 00:02:50,970
>> "Heroes" is way better
Because it actually answers
68
00:02:51,037 --> 00:02:52,038
Stuff.
69
00:02:52,105 --> 00:02:54,406
On "Lost," they don't even know
What they're doing.
70
00:02:54,474 --> 00:02:55,408
What are you doing?
71
00:02:55,475 --> 00:02:57,543
No, wait!
72
00:02:58,845 --> 00:03:01,814
>> I can't believe we just
Survived a nuclear war.
73
00:03:01,881 --> 00:03:02,749
>> yeah.
74
00:03:02,815 --> 00:03:05,151
Everyone we know is either dead
Or a zombie.
75
00:03:05,218 --> 00:03:08,221
>> we've got plenty of food, but
Most of it's crap.
76
00:03:08,288 --> 00:03:11,224
>> oh, you know what would
Really hit the spot right now?
77
00:03:11,291 --> 00:03:13,359
Hey, kool-aid!
78
00:03:13,426 --> 00:03:14,961
>> oh, yeah!
79
00:03:15,028 --> 00:03:18,231
Aw, yeah!
80
00:03:18,298 --> 00:03:20,600
>> aaahhh!
81
00:03:20,667 --> 00:03:23,703
>> oh, yeah.
82
00:03:23,770 --> 00:03:27,440
>> we are here today to announce
Michael jackson's deal to
83
00:03:27,507 --> 00:03:30,710
Perform exclusively at las
Vegas' excelsior hotel.
84
00:03:30,777 --> 00:03:33,046
>> ♪ hoo-hoo ♪
>> to promote the deal, we
85
00:03:33,112 --> 00:03:36,115
Created this.
86
00:03:36,182 --> 00:03:39,252
[ crowd ohs ]
>> it's even more beautiful than
87
00:03:39,319 --> 00:03:40,019
I thought!
88
00:03:40,086 --> 00:03:47,360
[ beep ]
[ rock music plays ]
89
00:03:47,427 --> 00:03:50,196
[ crowd gasps ]
>> what the --
90
00:03:57,203 --> 00:03:59,204
What's it doing?
91
00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:04,644
[ indistinct shouting ]
No!
92
00:04:04,711 --> 00:04:05,778
No, stop!
93
00:04:05,845 --> 00:04:07,080
Why won't it stop?
94
00:04:07,146 --> 00:04:08,147
>> mmm!
95
00:04:08,214 --> 00:04:09,315
Big boy.
96
00:04:09,382 --> 00:04:11,884
>> yes, I suppose it is a good
Restaurant.
97
00:04:11,951 --> 00:04:16,055
>> what do you mean,
"Restaurant"?
98
00:04:16,122 --> 00:04:18,757
>> encyclopedia, where have you
Been?
99
00:04:18,825 --> 00:04:21,827
>> mom, I solved the mystery of
Dad's missing balls.
100
00:04:21,894 --> 00:04:24,664
See, there they are -- right
Between his legs...
101
00:04:24,731 --> 00:04:26,466
And in that strange lady's
Mouth.
102
00:04:26,532 --> 00:04:28,568
>> aaahhh!
103
00:04:28,635 --> 00:04:29,469
>> look, hansel.
104
00:04:29,535 --> 00:04:31,404
I'm dropping bread crumbs to
Mark our way.
105
00:04:31,471 --> 00:04:34,040
>> our way back to our father
Who left us for dead in the
106
00:04:34,107 --> 00:04:34,540
Forest?
107
00:04:34,607 --> 00:04:35,608
>> whee!
108
00:04:35,675 --> 00:04:38,378
>> gretel, you are the smartest
Girl I know.
109
00:04:38,444 --> 00:04:39,112
>> thanks.
110
00:04:39,178 --> 00:04:40,513
>> that was not a compliment.
111
00:04:40,580 --> 00:04:41,581
>> I'm hungry.
112
00:04:41,648 --> 00:04:45,183
[ gasps ]
Let's eat this house.
113
00:04:45,251 --> 00:04:46,386
Mmm!
114
00:04:46,452 --> 00:04:47,553
Frosting!
115
00:04:47,620 --> 00:04:49,989
>> I think that's bird [bleep]
>> mmm!
116
00:04:50,056 --> 00:04:52,759
Bird [bleep]
>> children!
117
00:04:52,825 --> 00:04:53,426
>> both: aah!
118
00:04:53,493 --> 00:04:55,194
>> you must come inside.
119
00:04:55,261 --> 00:04:56,663
You need a good meal.
120
00:04:56,729 --> 00:04:59,065
>> [ laughs ]
♪ la la-la la-la ♪
121
00:04:59,132 --> 00:05:01,167
[ laughs ]
>> it'll be so nice to have you
122
00:05:05,138 --> 00:05:06,205
For lunch.
123
00:05:06,272 --> 00:05:08,307
>> double entendre!
124
00:05:08,374 --> 00:05:11,244
[ grunts ]
>> no! No!
125
00:05:11,310 --> 00:05:12,211
Ow!
126
00:05:12,278 --> 00:05:13,746
I'm burning alive!
127
00:05:13,813 --> 00:05:14,947
Why?!
128
00:05:15,014 --> 00:05:17,550
[ cries ]
>> we'll sell more gingerbread
129
00:05:17,617 --> 00:05:20,153
Than ever when my wife is done
Building her candy house.
130
00:05:20,219 --> 00:05:22,155
The press we'll get is enormous.
131
00:05:22,221 --> 00:05:26,893
Oh, how she loves making
Children happy!
132
00:05:26,959 --> 00:05:30,396
>> both: revenge is a dish best
Served hot.
133
00:05:30,463 --> 00:05:32,165
>> the end.
134
00:05:32,231 --> 00:05:36,335
And what was the moral of the
Story, baby?
135
00:05:36,402 --> 00:05:37,336
Exactly!
136
00:05:37,403 --> 00:05:42,975
[ laughs ]
Good night.
137
00:05:43,042 --> 00:05:45,211
>> and now back to...
138
00:05:45,278 --> 00:05:48,281
>> kids!
139
00:05:48,347 --> 00:05:50,750
Kids?
140
00:05:51,183 --> 00:05:52,251
>> so long, flash.
141
00:05:52,318 --> 00:05:55,288
You'll have to pick up the pace
If you want to catch
142
00:05:55,354 --> 00:05:56,222
Reverse flash.
143
00:05:56,289 --> 00:05:59,392
[ laughs evilly ]
>> ugh!
144
00:05:59,459 --> 00:06:00,860
Again with reverse flash!
145
00:06:00,927 --> 00:06:04,497
He looks just like me but with
The exact opposite color scheme.
146
00:06:04,564 --> 00:06:05,198
Brilliant.
147
00:06:05,264 --> 00:06:06,866
>> at least he wears a mask.
148
00:06:06,933 --> 00:06:10,369
Bizarro superman looks just me
But with a face like somebody
149
00:06:10,436 --> 00:06:11,771
Threw up in a ice tray.
150
00:06:11,838 --> 00:06:14,107
Seriously, it looks like someone
[bleep] Out kryptonite and then
151
00:06:14,173 --> 00:06:15,274
Put it on someone's face again.
152
00:06:15,341 --> 00:06:17,376
>> have you ever seen
Negative wonder woman?
153
00:06:17,443 --> 00:06:19,612
>> hey, wonder woman!
154
00:06:19,679 --> 00:06:21,080
[bleep] You!
155
00:06:21,147 --> 00:06:24,183
Now, where did I leave my
Visible jet?
156
00:06:24,250 --> 00:06:25,151
Oh, look!
157
00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:26,319
There it is.
158
00:06:26,385 --> 00:06:28,788
Easy to find.
159
00:06:28,855 --> 00:06:31,157
>> don't grab or anything.
160
00:06:31,224 --> 00:06:32,325
>> I'd grab her.
161
00:06:32,391 --> 00:06:34,460
>> grab her till she couldn't
Walk.
162
00:06:34,527 --> 00:06:35,061
Booyah!
163
00:06:35,128 --> 00:06:36,696
>> ugh!
164
00:06:36,763 --> 00:06:38,531
>> aw, man, am I thirsty.
165
00:06:38,598 --> 00:06:39,465
>> me too.
166
00:06:39,532 --> 00:06:41,834
Want to know what would really
Hit the spot?
167
00:06:41,901 --> 00:06:44,137
Hey, kool-aid!
168
00:06:51,409 --> 00:06:53,780
>> oh, yeah!
169
00:06:53,846 --> 00:06:55,481
>> hey, get your hands off me.
170
00:06:55,548 --> 00:06:56,482
I won an oscar.
171
00:06:56,549 --> 00:06:57,116
Did you?
172
00:06:57,183 --> 00:06:58,885
Huh? Did jew?
173
00:06:58,951 --> 00:06:59,752
Get it?
174
00:06:59,819 --> 00:07:01,020
I said "Jew."
175
00:07:01,087 --> 00:07:03,923
What are you looking at, vag
Badge?
176
00:07:03,990 --> 00:07:09,328
[ laughs ]
Take me to rehab!
177
00:07:09,395 --> 00:07:12,198
>> yeah, I love sex and
Johnnie walker.
178
00:07:12,265 --> 00:07:14,867
>> paris, I'm actually
Jimmie walker.
179
00:07:14,934 --> 00:07:15,802
>> ew!
180
00:07:15,868 --> 00:07:17,170
I got to get to rehab.
181
00:07:17,236 --> 00:07:19,806
>> lindsay, are you okay?
182
00:07:19,872 --> 00:07:21,641
>> aaahhh!
183
00:07:21,707 --> 00:07:25,111
>> experts are baffled by this
Recent trend -- celebrity after
184
00:07:25,178 --> 00:07:26,846
Celebrity rushing off to rehab.
185
00:07:26,913 --> 00:07:29,549
Coincidence or something more?
186
00:07:29,615 --> 00:07:31,751
>> you're all acting crazy.
187
00:07:31,818 --> 00:07:35,421
You're going to expose our plan
To take over the world.
188
00:07:35,488 --> 00:07:37,056
Stop that.
189
00:07:37,123 --> 00:07:39,959
>> yeah, something is [burps]
Affecting us.
190
00:07:40,026 --> 00:07:40,426
Oh.
191
00:07:40,493 --> 00:07:41,060
Oh, god.
192
00:07:41,127 --> 00:07:42,495
I still taste jimmie walker.
193
00:07:42,562 --> 00:07:45,498
>> are you consuming enough
Alcohol rations to kill earth's
194
00:07:45,565 --> 00:07:46,966
Deadly atmospheric bacteria?
195
00:07:47,033 --> 00:07:48,734
>> [ slurred ] More than enough.
196
00:07:48,801 --> 00:07:49,769
>> shaznook!
197
00:07:49,836 --> 00:07:52,004
It must be having some sort of
Side effect.
198
00:07:52,071 --> 00:07:53,706
>> yeah, look at lindsay.
199
00:07:53,773 --> 00:07:57,243
You know, 'cause on our planet
She was a neurosurgeon.
200
00:07:57,310 --> 00:07:59,478
>> so hungry!
201
00:07:59,545 --> 00:08:02,048
Must feed freckles!
202
00:08:02,114 --> 00:08:04,650
[ tinkerbell squeals ]
>> tinkerbell!
203
00:08:04,717 --> 00:08:07,787
>> then we need to act now
Before the effects get any
204
00:08:07,854 --> 00:08:08,754
Worse.
205
00:08:08,821 --> 00:08:14,293
Shed your skin and initiate
Attack sequences.
206
00:08:14,360 --> 00:08:16,162
Paris, take out bush.
207
00:08:16,229 --> 00:08:17,496
>> m'kay.
208
00:08:17,563 --> 00:08:18,931
>> president bush.
209
00:08:18,998 --> 00:08:20,032
>> m'kay.
210
00:08:20,099 --> 00:08:22,301
>> britney, return our child
King to the home world for
211
00:08:22,368 --> 00:08:23,035
Safekeeping.
212
00:08:23,102 --> 00:08:23,903
>> 'kay, y'all.
213
00:08:23,970 --> 00:08:25,504
Come on, sean preston.
214
00:08:25,571 --> 00:08:27,607
Where did I leave that little
Baby?
215
00:08:27,673 --> 00:08:30,409
>> [ coos ]
>> lindsay, you...
216
00:08:30,476 --> 00:08:31,410
Uh...
217
00:08:31,477 --> 00:08:33,011
You, uh...
218
00:08:33,078 --> 00:08:35,313
Guard this coffee cup.
219
00:08:35,381 --> 00:08:37,616
Oh, just do whatever you want.
220
00:08:37,683 --> 00:08:38,217
>> hey.
221
00:08:38,284 --> 00:08:39,485
You're not one of us.
222
00:08:39,552 --> 00:08:40,919
>> no, I'm not.
223
00:08:40,986 --> 00:08:44,957
I just love this uniform and
Team hatred.
224
00:08:45,024 --> 00:08:46,225
Everyone together now!
225
00:08:46,292 --> 00:08:47,827
Schnell! Schnell! Schnell!
226
00:08:47,894 --> 00:08:51,264
>> let's go kill people!
227
00:08:51,330 --> 00:08:52,565
>> woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo!
228
00:08:52,632 --> 00:08:53,799
Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk!
229
00:08:53,866 --> 00:08:58,638
>> oh, hell, I left your car
Seat in the "Skymall" catalog
230
00:08:58,704 --> 00:09:00,139
That I meant to order it from.
231
00:09:00,206 --> 00:09:01,807
All right, sit on my lap, baby.
232
00:09:01,874 --> 00:09:03,876
This will be safe.
233
00:09:06,479 --> 00:09:09,482
Sean preston, use your baby
Wings!
234
00:09:09,548 --> 00:09:11,017
Oh, my...
235
00:09:11,083 --> 00:09:12,084
God.
236
00:09:12,151 --> 00:09:15,121
Ewww!
237
00:09:15,187 --> 00:09:17,123
Well, more where that came from.
238
00:09:17,189 --> 00:09:18,991
>> everyone, I'm a lizard!
239
00:09:19,058 --> 00:09:20,526
I'm a lizard!
240
00:09:20,593 --> 00:09:21,594
>> no, my son.
241
00:09:21,661 --> 00:09:23,329
You're just an anti-semite.
242
00:09:23,396 --> 00:09:26,265
>> [ whining ] I want to be a
Lizard!
243
00:09:26,332 --> 00:09:31,137
[ crying ]
Don't touch me, jew.
244
00:09:31,203 --> 00:09:33,306
>> give it up, lizard, or we'll
Blow your head off!
245
00:09:33,372 --> 00:09:34,573
Ha ha, you idiots.
246
00:09:34,640 --> 00:09:37,243
Don't you know anything about
Geometry?
247
00:09:37,310 --> 00:09:38,511
I'm a lizard.
248
00:09:38,577 --> 00:09:40,980
My head will always grow back.
249
00:09:41,047 --> 00:09:42,248
Check it out.
250
00:09:42,315 --> 00:09:44,383
[ grunts ]
>> take that, president bush!
251
00:09:48,421 --> 00:09:50,690
>> [ gasps ]
What are you doing to my
252
00:09:50,756 --> 00:09:51,357
Husband?
253
00:09:51,424 --> 00:09:53,225
>> you married your son?
254
00:09:53,292 --> 00:09:54,193
Eww!
255
00:09:54,260 --> 00:09:57,663
>> that's the other
President bush, you hussy!
256
00:09:57,730 --> 00:10:01,233
That's george bush sr.
>> read my lips -- call an
257
00:10:01,300 --> 00:10:02,034
Ambulance.
258
00:10:02,101 --> 00:10:05,638
Nobody messes with my snookums.
259
00:10:05,705 --> 00:10:07,707
[ grunts ]
>> wait.
260
00:10:10,276 --> 00:10:12,345
Wait, wait, wait.
261
00:10:15,748 --> 00:10:16,382
Ow.
262
00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:17,984
Stop.
263
00:10:18,050 --> 00:10:20,019
>> don't try to run now, 'cause
It's coming.
264
00:10:20,086 --> 00:10:20,553
>> ow!
265
00:10:20,619 --> 00:10:21,854
Oh, you tricked me.
266
00:10:21,921 --> 00:10:23,189
>> here it comes.
267
00:10:23,255 --> 00:10:23,956
Hold on.
268
00:10:24,023 --> 00:10:26,192
Get ready for the sweet release.
269
00:10:26,258 --> 00:10:35,167
[ grunts ]
[ roars ]
270
00:10:35,234 --> 00:10:40,973
>> from the moment the visitors
Drank our alcohol...
271
00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:42,274
They were doomed.
272
00:10:42,341 --> 00:10:47,279
For through a million years of
Keggers and beer blasts, man had
273
00:10:47,346 --> 00:10:50,750
Earned his tolerance.
274
00:10:50,816 --> 00:10:53,452
>> [ cheering ]
>> earthlings rule!
275
00:10:53,519 --> 00:10:54,487
>> yeah!
276
00:10:54,553 --> 00:10:56,055
>> I'm the mother[bleep]
President of this planet.
277
00:10:56,122 --> 00:10:57,223
>> together: [ chanting ] Earth!
278
00:10:57,289 --> 00:10:57,690
Earth!
279
00:10:57,757 --> 00:10:58,557
Earth! Earth!
280
00:10:58,624 --> 00:10:59,458
Earth! Earth!
281
00:10:59,525 --> 00:11:00,326
Earth! Earth!
282
00:11:00,393 --> 00:11:01,127
Earth! Earth!
283
00:11:01,193 --> 00:11:01,961
Earth! Earth!
284
00:11:02,028 --> 00:11:03,929
>> oh.
285
00:11:03,996 --> 00:11:05,498
>> did I miss something?
286
00:11:05,564 --> 00:11:07,900
>> ♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
287
00:11:07,967 --> 00:11:10,036
♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk
Bawk bawk ♪
288
00:11:10,102 --> 00:11:12,171
♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
289
00:11:12,238 --> 00:11:14,340
♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk
Bawk bawk ♪
290
00:11:14,407 --> 00:11:16,475
♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
291
00:11:16,542 --> 00:11:18,677
♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk
Bawk bawk ♪
292
00:11:18,744 --> 00:11:20,746
Ba-gawk! Bawk.
19079
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