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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,108 --> 00:00:14,638 Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells Exclusive for http://UKsubtitles.ru 2 00:00:25,750 --> 00:00:27,718 - No carte. Monsieur Gruber? - No carte. 3 00:00:27,917 --> 00:00:29,208 No carte. 4 00:00:31,208 --> 00:00:32,678 Nine. 5 00:00:32,917 --> 00:00:34,801 Looks like the house is going to be 6 00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:38,343 6,000,000 Reichsmarks lighter in bullion this weekend. 7 00:00:55,375 --> 00:00:56,845 Fu Manchu! 8 00:00:57,042 --> 00:00:59,839 You can't just keep yelling out the name of the game, Pierre, 9 00:01:00,042 --> 00:01:01,251 that's not how it works. 10 00:01:01,458 --> 00:01:02,750 Fu Manchu. 11 00:01:02,958 --> 00:01:05,424 - Stop being a child! - This game sucks. I win. 12 00:01:05,625 --> 00:01:08,505 It doesn't suck. It's made by a very reputable plastics company. 13 00:01:11,125 --> 00:01:12,879 There isn't a bank. 14 00:01:13,708 --> 00:01:15,593 - I brought that. - Why? 15 00:01:15,792 --> 00:01:19,845 I thought we were playing Money. It's the only reason I agreed to this board-game bullshit. 16 00:01:22,708 --> 00:01:24,214 I thought you would. 17 00:01:27,458 --> 00:01:28,880 Mission o'clock, boys and girls. 18 00:01:29,083 --> 00:01:32,923 The Nazis have occupied a coastal Moroccan city called Waheed al Quarn... 19 00:01:33,125 --> 00:01:35,840 What do the Nazis want with a Maghreb state in North Africa? 20 00:01:36,042 --> 00:01:37,547 What's that on your shoulder, Claire? 21 00:01:37,750 --> 00:01:40,630 - Nothing. - Spot on. Nothing. Just that. 22 00:01:40,833 --> 00:01:42,469 - Now what's on mine? - Three stars. 23 00:01:42,667 --> 00:01:44,504 Yes, three st... 24 00:01:50,125 --> 00:01:51,714 Yes. Two stars. 25 00:01:51,958 --> 00:01:54,803 And those stars mean I talk, you shut your damn mouth. 26 00:01:55,000 --> 00:01:58,674 One month ago my Allied Command sent one of their top agents 27 00:01:58,875 --> 00:02:00,960 code-named Gruber to Waheed Al Quarn. 28 00:02:01,167 --> 00:02:02,755 He collected information that indicates 29 00:02:02,958 --> 00:02:05,720 Hitler has taken up residence there in the casino. 30 00:02:05,917 --> 00:02:08,382 However, Gruber himself has completely disappeared. 31 00:02:08,583 --> 00:02:11,759 Your mission is to get into that casino and find Gruber, 32 00:02:11,958 --> 00:02:13,961 but above all, kill Hitler. 33 00:02:14,167 --> 00:02:17,177 Well, there's the casino. 34 00:02:20,042 --> 00:02:22,258 And there's an Italian submarine in the bay, 35 00:02:22,458 --> 00:02:24,675 probably a Gino Terrini Class. 36 00:02:24,875 --> 00:02:28,218 That thing would do a good job of keeping any unwanted visitors out. 37 00:02:28,458 --> 00:02:31,173 All looks like a bit of a Chinese dinner to me. 38 00:02:31,375 --> 00:02:33,046 I say we call in an aerial strike, 39 00:02:33,250 --> 00:02:36,379 dig out Hitler's corpse by sun-up and have a light supper. 40 00:02:36,583 --> 00:02:38,421 - I'll get on the radio to base. - Hold on. 41 00:02:38,625 --> 00:02:40,379 First of all we should take out the submarine. 42 00:02:40,583 --> 00:02:43,961 We should walk in, find Hitler, and blow his face off his head bone. 43 00:02:44,167 --> 00:02:47,094 - That's a perfectly elegant solution. - It's called getting shit done, lady. 44 00:02:47,292 --> 00:02:49,460 No it's called getting people killed, you louse. 45 00:02:49,667 --> 00:02:51,089 - You wanna throw down? - Shut up, you two. 46 00:02:51,292 --> 00:02:52,501 We take a vote, then. 47 00:02:52,708 --> 00:02:55,968 There are two choices - Jackson's plan with the casino, 48 00:02:56,167 --> 00:02:57,838 and Claire's with the submarine. 49 00:02:58,042 --> 00:03:00,376 - What about my plan? - Who votes for Jackson? 50 00:03:03,417 --> 00:03:06,178 Okay, now Claire's plan. 51 00:03:09,125 --> 00:03:12,171 Fine, we split up and do both. 52 00:03:12,375 --> 00:03:14,213 As for me... 53 00:03:14,417 --> 00:03:19,382 - It's the casino. - All right! 54 00:03:31,875 --> 00:03:33,629 Any sign of Hitler? 55 00:03:35,667 --> 00:03:41,178 No, but there is an unusual degree of security for your average casino. 56 00:03:47,125 --> 00:03:48,595 llsa? 57 00:03:48,833 --> 00:03:51,678 It's Rommel, the Desert Fox! 58 00:04:23,125 --> 00:04:24,677 You look... 59 00:04:26,750 --> 00:04:29,049 The submarine is awfully close to shore. 60 00:04:29,250 --> 00:04:31,253 Surely we could swim out to it quite easily. 61 00:04:31,458 --> 00:04:35,085 Hello, I am Gina, but they call me Gypsy. 62 00:04:35,292 --> 00:04:37,840 - What are you drinking tonight? - Oh, juice for me. 63 00:04:38,042 --> 00:04:40,258 I'll have a gin, with a pinch of Tony Manero. 64 00:04:40,458 --> 00:04:42,959 - What's your accent, Italian? - Romanian. 65 00:04:43,167 --> 00:04:46,841 You don't have any Jenson and Jenson menthol coupes, do you? 66 00:04:47,042 --> 00:04:50,004 Of course we do. Who doesn't stock menthol coupes? 67 00:04:50,208 --> 00:04:52,046 A packet of those, then. 68 00:04:52,250 --> 00:04:54,170 I'll return with your drinks. 69 00:04:54,375 --> 00:04:57,835 You don't smoke menthol coupes, you're a Montalbano Classics man. 70 00:04:58,042 --> 00:05:00,969 And Gypsy isn't Romanian. I needed to get her to say "coupe". 71 00:05:01,167 --> 00:05:04,378 It's the only way to tell the difference between an Italian and a Romanian. 72 00:05:04,583 --> 00:05:07,345 Never mind that. The submarine just docked. 73 00:05:13,542 --> 00:05:15,379 Oh great, Italians. 74 00:05:24,208 --> 00:05:26,507 What are all these Italians doing here? 75 00:05:26,708 --> 00:05:28,794 Once a month, all the submarine boys come here 76 00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:30,043 and drink themselves senseless. 77 00:05:30,250 --> 00:05:32,965 Plus they can't seem to get enough of Rosetta Marconi. 78 00:05:41,917 --> 00:05:43,967 Rosetta! 79 00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:47,173 Rosetta! 80 00:05:50,417 --> 00:05:52,585 - We need to take the sub now. - Are you mad? 81 00:05:52,792 --> 00:05:55,044 We haven't got a crispy wonton chance on our own. 82 00:05:55,250 --> 00:05:57,300 - We should call in a strike. - You heard her. 83 00:05:57,500 --> 00:06:00,215 We won't have a chance as good as this for another month. 84 00:06:00,417 --> 00:06:02,585 - All the sailors are in here. - I don't know about this. 85 00:06:02,792 --> 00:06:05,293 - What's the matter, Tucker, scared? - No, it's just I think... 86 00:06:05,500 --> 00:06:07,834 Fine, then let's move. 87 00:06:16,750 --> 00:06:19,630 You've had amnesia for two years? 88 00:06:34,625 --> 00:06:37,340 All this time... l thought you were dead. 89 00:06:37,542 --> 00:06:42,507 But I have kept you close to my heart. 90 00:06:43,708 --> 00:06:45,509 Don't you recognise her? 91 00:06:48,292 --> 00:06:50,211 It's you. 92 00:06:54,208 --> 00:07:00,004 My love, my wife, we are together again at last. 93 00:07:03,875 --> 00:07:05,676 My God, llsa was married to Rommel! 94 00:07:05,875 --> 00:07:08,506 I've been married to things a lot scarier than Nazis, my friend. 95 00:07:11,750 --> 00:07:14,049 I'm the general manager, you know. 96 00:07:14,250 --> 00:07:17,675 No one above me other than you-know-who. 97 00:07:25,875 --> 00:07:30,130 Well, we had a bit of trouble recently with a man up in room 219, 98 00:07:30,333 --> 00:07:32,171 but we took care of that. 99 00:07:32,417 --> 00:07:34,005 I must go, my sweet. 100 00:07:37,583 --> 00:07:38,923 We'll see. 101 00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:41,920 Don't run away now, my love. 102 00:07:48,792 --> 00:07:50,261 That's it! 103 00:07:50,458 --> 00:07:51,928 Hey! 104 00:07:57,417 --> 00:07:58,459 So... 105 00:08:23,125 --> 00:08:25,673 I'll put him out for an hour. 106 00:08:32,208 --> 00:08:35,717 All right, I'll deploy the smoke grenades, and you're going to have to fight. 107 00:08:37,542 --> 00:08:39,959 Oh great, Italians. 108 00:08:40,167 --> 00:08:41,589 Jump, damn it! 109 00:08:41,958 --> 00:08:43,380 I can't swim. 110 00:08:43,583 --> 00:08:44,970 What? 111 00:09:04,167 --> 00:09:05,423 Room service. 112 00:09:06,750 --> 00:09:10,507 - I'm sorry, I didn't order any... - But I insist. I insist. 113 00:09:10,708 --> 00:09:14,927 - Really, now is not the best time. - Please, you will enjoy. 114 00:09:16,417 --> 00:09:17,922 Red wine? 115 00:09:18,125 --> 00:09:19,926 With chicken? 116 00:09:20,125 --> 00:09:21,630 Burn in hell, you dog! 117 00:09:27,417 --> 00:09:29,918 Your brother died like a dog, Jinko. 118 00:09:30,125 --> 00:09:33,254 But you at least have the strength to die with honour. 119 00:09:33,458 --> 00:09:37,677 And it is an honour to die by your hand, Sharif. 120 00:09:37,875 --> 00:09:39,167 Ughh... 121 00:09:39,375 --> 00:09:43,796 One part gin, one part pomegranate syrup, 122 00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:49,168 fill with pineapple juice, serve over crushed ice. 123 00:09:49,375 --> 00:09:52,966 The perfect Fruit'n'Khamun. 124 00:10:00,792 --> 00:10:03,470 No, thanks. I brought my own. 125 00:10:45,875 --> 00:10:49,549 Where is your friend? Ran off, did he? 126 00:10:49,750 --> 00:10:51,753 - How about a drink? - Gin. 127 00:10:51,958 --> 00:10:54,175 - With what? - Just gin. 128 00:10:55,208 --> 00:10:56,418 Okay... 129 00:10:59,583 --> 00:11:00,756 Ah... 130 00:11:01,042 --> 00:11:02,713 Gypsy, you whore! 131 00:11:02,958 --> 00:11:05,293 What? That was quick, she's over there. 132 00:11:05,500 --> 00:11:08,001 Tell me, Gypsy, do you call these drugs you sell "pure"? 133 00:11:08,208 --> 00:11:10,970 I get it from my man Colonel Chang and his stuff is always pure. 134 00:11:11,167 --> 00:11:14,011 And do you sell me a great big bullshit horse with this story? 135 00:11:14,250 --> 00:11:16,716 - Tough luck. Non-refundable. - Non-refundable? 136 00:11:16,917 --> 00:11:19,050 Good thing for you I don't want no refund. 137 00:11:19,250 --> 00:11:22,545 I'm gonna get my money's worth and I'm going to get it right now. 138 00:11:42,583 --> 00:11:44,835 Can I have my gin now, please? 139 00:11:52,833 --> 00:11:54,339 Pair of ladies. 140 00:12:02,625 --> 00:12:06,963 Zat was very amusing, but I hope these vimsical tricks 141 00:12:07,167 --> 00:12:11,125 play no part in your impressive vinnings, Mr... 142 00:12:11,333 --> 00:12:13,632 Baccarat, John Baccarat. 143 00:12:13,833 --> 00:12:16,417 I save the tricks for the ladies, Mr... 144 00:12:16,625 --> 00:12:19,671 Rommel, Erwin Rommel. 145 00:12:19,875 --> 00:12:21,795 Mr Rimmel. Yeah, right. 146 00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:23,126 No, it's... 147 00:12:25,917 --> 00:12:30,053 Sveetness, come and have a game. 148 00:12:33,167 --> 00:12:35,798 Ah, Mr Baccarat. 149 00:12:36,000 --> 00:12:39,544 May I introduce you to my wife, llsa? 150 00:12:40,625 --> 00:12:42,593 I'm sure you von't mind if she joins. 151 00:12:45,542 --> 00:12:49,714 - I vager a banco of 3000. - 3000 for banco. 152 00:12:49,917 --> 00:12:51,007 Banco. 153 00:12:56,792 --> 00:12:57,834 - No carte. - No carte. 154 00:12:58,042 --> 00:12:59,630 - Carte. - Carte. 155 00:13:01,708 --> 00:13:02,965 Eight. 156 00:13:03,167 --> 00:13:05,715 Nine, bad luck. 157 00:13:07,667 --> 00:13:11,092 You seem to have quite ze touch, Mr Baccarat. 158 00:13:11,292 --> 00:13:15,677 Vould you be interested in a private game... at ze owner's table? 159 00:13:15,875 --> 00:13:19,715 - You gonna bring the legs? - Well... of course. 160 00:13:19,917 --> 00:13:21,671 Then that sounds just dandy. Thanks, Ed. 161 00:13:21,875 --> 00:13:23,048 Schplendid. 162 00:13:23,250 --> 00:13:26,011 I shall send somevone for you in an hour. 163 00:13:26,208 --> 00:13:29,633 As for now, I have business to attend to. 164 00:13:31,083 --> 00:13:33,169 Keep having fun, my love. 165 00:13:46,708 --> 00:13:49,719 Your friend, he's in the submarine, I know. 166 00:13:49,917 --> 00:13:53,259 - It's my fault. - Not entirely. 167 00:13:53,458 --> 00:13:55,461 I want to help you get him back. 168 00:13:55,667 --> 00:13:57,919 Thanks, but I don't think you can. 169 00:13:59,042 --> 00:14:01,720 Hey, what are they delivering, ammunition? 170 00:14:01,917 --> 00:14:03,505 Coffee beans. 171 00:14:03,708 --> 00:14:07,133 They drink so much of the stuff they need a new crate every hour. 172 00:14:07,333 --> 00:14:09,502 My brother Gino, he flies the plane. 173 00:14:14,125 --> 00:14:15,677 Caffè, caffè, caffè! 174 00:14:24,667 --> 00:14:27,250 For the love of God, don't give me any more coffee! 175 00:15:12,708 --> 00:15:13,918 Crotch. 176 00:15:14,542 --> 00:15:15,466 Crotch. 177 00:15:15,667 --> 00:15:17,670 Crotch. Well done, my Fuehrer. 178 00:15:32,375 --> 00:15:34,508 In theory, my Fuehrer, yes, they are ready to go. 179 00:15:34,708 --> 00:15:37,802 However there is a small issue with the auto-fire mode. 180 00:15:38,000 --> 00:15:42,302 The guns tend to heat up when fired at full automatic. 181 00:15:42,500 --> 00:15:44,420 Three of my men have been badly burnt. 182 00:15:44,625 --> 00:15:48,844 I propose we trial some different kinds of ammunition, and perhaps... 183 00:16:01,792 --> 00:16:03,711 My Fuehrer, his name is John Baccarat. 184 00:16:03,917 --> 00:16:07,295 He's been having a tremendous amount of luck on ze gaming floor. 185 00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:10,178 I think it's time we gave him a private game. 186 00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:18,211 My Fuehrer, since we have such a large quantity of gold, 187 00:16:18,417 --> 00:16:20,751 I was thinking maybe we could... 188 00:16:40,500 --> 00:16:43,048 Maybe I thought you were so wound up playing lover girl 189 00:16:43,250 --> 00:16:45,134 that you'd forget we're trying to kill Hitler. 190 00:16:45,333 --> 00:16:48,711 Thanks for filling us in on the whole "married to a Nazi" thing by the way. 191 00:16:52,500 --> 00:16:53,626 Why not screw him and get it over with? 192 00:16:58,125 --> 00:16:59,844 Greetings. 193 00:17:00,875 --> 00:17:03,044 Can I have some of that Chocolate Monday, Jackson? 194 00:17:03,250 --> 00:17:05,467 - Knock yourself out. - Much obliged. 195 00:17:07,375 --> 00:17:09,129 What is the commotion about? 196 00:17:12,292 --> 00:17:15,717 You're John Baccarat? Oh my. 197 00:17:15,917 --> 00:17:20,586 - You are aware Hitler plans to kill you in a private card game, yes? - Not if I kill him first. 198 00:17:32,208 --> 00:17:35,171 Friends, please. Look at this on the sunny side. 199 00:17:35,375 --> 00:17:39,084 Both of you will be in the same room as Hitler in less than an hour. 200 00:17:39,292 --> 00:17:42,882 This is our chance. I'm going to call Claire. 201 00:17:52,000 --> 00:17:54,418 - Yes? - Claire, how's things, my friend? 202 00:17:54,667 --> 00:17:56,172 - Capital. - Superb. 203 00:17:56,375 --> 00:17:59,586 It seems Hitler is using the bullion winnings from his casino 204 00:17:59,792 --> 00:18:02,008 to rearm the entire German army 205 00:18:02,208 --> 00:18:05,338 with superior golden super weapons made of gold. 206 00:18:05,542 --> 00:18:08,635 - All right. - Hitler also seems to be killing off any successful gamblers 207 00:18:08,833 --> 00:18:11,132 with some sort of private death game. 208 00:18:11,333 --> 00:18:14,711 Oh yes, and Jackson seems to have been invited to one of these... 209 00:18:14,917 --> 00:18:16,469 private games. 210 00:18:16,667 --> 00:18:18,883 You got the submarine under control? 211 00:18:19,083 --> 00:18:21,501 Can you stop the shipment? Can I speak to Tucker? 212 00:18:21,708 --> 00:18:23,260 Ah... he's in the gents. 213 00:18:23,458 --> 00:18:26,006 The submarine should be neutralised any minute now. 214 00:18:26,208 --> 00:18:29,835 Excellent. We are going to try and turn Hitler's game around on him. 215 00:18:30,042 --> 00:18:32,294 The game starts in half an hour. 216 00:18:32,500 --> 00:18:36,506 Send us a signal when the bay is under control and the reinforcements are here. 217 00:18:36,708 --> 00:18:39,553 - Good luck, my friend. - Same to you. 218 00:18:52,958 --> 00:18:54,084 Much obliged. 219 00:18:57,417 --> 00:18:58,803 Two thousand. 220 00:19:02,250 --> 00:19:03,969 - Banco. - Banco. 221 00:19:35,583 --> 00:19:36,709 Ciao, boys! 222 00:19:54,833 --> 00:19:56,043 Damn it! 223 00:19:56,792 --> 00:19:59,174 Three. Game, Fuehrer. 224 00:20:03,917 --> 00:20:05,386 - Suivi. - Suivi? 225 00:20:05,625 --> 00:20:07,095 - Banco. - Banco. 226 00:20:07,292 --> 00:20:08,880 - Carte. - Carte. 227 00:20:28,042 --> 00:20:29,547 Nine. 228 00:20:33,917 --> 00:20:34,924 Yep. 229 00:20:53,000 --> 00:20:55,761 The Nazis are shipping speedboats full of weapons out of the bay. 230 00:20:55,958 --> 00:20:57,049 Right. 231 00:20:57,250 --> 00:21:00,296 You keep distracting the Italians. I'll see what I can do. 232 00:21:02,083 --> 00:21:04,501 Oh, yes. I am sorry about all this. 233 00:21:04,708 --> 00:21:06,214 Forget about it. 234 00:21:39,708 --> 00:21:42,091 Drop it, Rommel, or Pierre is gonna ice Adolf. 235 00:21:42,292 --> 00:21:45,385 - He's got a pretty clear shot. - So do I. 236 00:21:45,583 --> 00:21:49,293 llsa, have you been in cahoots with this Baccarat character all along? 237 00:21:50,792 --> 00:21:53,209 I'm bangin' her, Rommel. 238 00:21:53,417 --> 00:21:55,799 How could you do this to me? 239 00:21:56,000 --> 00:21:58,299 I'm bangin' her Rommel. 240 00:21:58,500 --> 00:21:59,709 I'm bangin' her, Rommel. 241 00:22:13,917 --> 00:22:15,718 Damn it, they're gone. 242 00:22:15,917 --> 00:22:18,500 Looks like Claire and Tucker sent in the cavalry. 243 00:22:28,042 --> 00:22:30,969 I don't think you can make banco this time, Adolf. 244 00:22:31,167 --> 00:22:33,252 Banco. 245 00:22:35,083 --> 00:22:38,129 Okay, boys, shoot these Nazis. 246 00:22:40,792 --> 00:22:44,170 Who needs a gun when you've got... imagination? 247 00:22:49,250 --> 00:22:50,542 Bang! 248 00:23:30,750 --> 00:23:32,919 I am the King of Waheed Al Quarn. 249 00:23:33,125 --> 00:23:35,258 Thank you, thank you for liberating our city! 250 00:23:35,458 --> 00:23:39,760 Don't mention it. What will you do with all that gold? 251 00:23:39,958 --> 00:23:43,549 We shall use it to restore Waheed Al Quarn to its former glory 252 00:23:43,750 --> 00:23:46,298 as the best brothel in North Africa! 253 00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:51,334 What is that immensely shiny object? 254 00:24:00,833 --> 00:24:04,258 Lieutenant, what do you think that ruddy great shiny thing is? 255 00:24:04,458 --> 00:24:07,090 I think it's an ordinance beacon, sir. 256 00:24:08,292 --> 00:24:10,295 Shell it, then, I suppose. 257 00:24:10,500 --> 00:24:11,460 Jones. 258 00:24:42,708 --> 00:24:44,758 The Mazzarucci Shaveissimo. 259 00:24:44,958 --> 00:24:49,011 Finally, you can be the one who always has time to look good. 260 00:24:49,208 --> 00:24:53,427 Mazzarucci Shaveissimo, re-define your face. 261 00:24:54,397 --> 00:25:05,926 Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells Exclusive for http://UKsubtitles.ru 262 00:25:33,875 --> 00:25:36,636 Everybody put your trousers on, orders are in. 263 00:25:36,833 --> 00:25:40,424 Over the last several days, Allied forces across Europe 264 00:25:40,625 --> 00:25:41,917 have been defecting to the Nazis. 265 00:25:42,125 --> 00:25:45,468 Field Marshall Jenkins' entire platoon has recently gone Nazi 266 00:25:45,667 --> 00:25:48,298 and Jenkins has a whole lot of classified information in his head 267 00:25:48,500 --> 00:25:50,468 we don't want the Nazis to get their hands on. 268 00:25:50,667 --> 00:25:53,843 Your mission is to get Jenkins back onto home soil, 269 00:25:54,042 --> 00:25:57,550 find out what's making our men defect to the Nazis, and kill Hitler! 21068

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