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1
00:00:36,033 --> 00:00:38,318
Hey, stud, we gettin'
dinner anytime soon?
2
00:00:38,386 --> 00:00:39,319
Oh, yeah.
Lookin' good.
3
00:00:39,387 --> 00:00:42,238
We got burger,
burger, chicken...
4
00:00:42,306 --> 00:00:45,758
And their sickly
cousin tofu dog.
5
00:00:45,826 --> 00:00:47,811
Look at this.
6
00:00:47,879 --> 00:00:49,546
You guys
are back together.
7
00:00:49,614 --> 00:00:51,214
We're all
back together again.
8
00:00:51,282 --> 00:00:52,983
How great is this?
9
00:00:53,051 --> 00:00:54,233
Yeah. Next time
either one of you
10
00:00:54,301 --> 00:00:56,002
feels like your marriage
is broken and empty,
11
00:00:56,070 --> 00:00:57,971
walk it off.
12
00:00:58,038 --> 00:00:59,539
Uh, grill
went out again.
13
00:00:59,607 --> 00:01:02,008
Is it? That's it. Care,
let's just get a new grill.
14
00:01:02,076 --> 00:01:03,176
We don't need
a new grill.
15
00:01:03,244 --> 00:01:05,879
Just do that thing you
do to start it up again.
16
00:01:05,946 --> 00:01:07,280
You mean crank up the
gas, throw on a match,
17
00:01:07,348 --> 00:01:09,716
and dive behind
the trash cans?
18
00:01:09,783 --> 00:01:10,950
Yeah, that.
19
00:01:11,018 --> 00:01:12,185
Come on, let's
just get a new one.
20
00:01:12,253 --> 00:01:14,354
I just saw in
a catalog for 500 bucks
21
00:01:14,422 --> 00:01:16,990
you can get ones with
personalized grates,
22
00:01:17,058 --> 00:01:20,960
and you can burn your
own logo into the meat.
23
00:01:21,029 --> 00:01:23,263
Knicks, jets, islanders.
24
00:01:23,331 --> 00:01:24,698
Stupidest thing
I've ever heard.
25
00:01:24,765 --> 00:01:27,050
Ok, tell me you wouldn't
love the maybelline logo
26
00:01:27,118 --> 00:01:29,419
seared right
into your pork chop.
27
00:01:29,487 --> 00:01:31,071
Just light it!
28
00:01:31,138 --> 00:01:32,672
Fine. Deac, help me out, would you?
29
00:01:32,740 --> 00:01:34,574
Yeah.
30
00:01:34,642 --> 00:01:38,178
Hey, guess who I have an
appointment with tomorrow at 10:15?
31
00:01:38,245 --> 00:01:39,179
Who?
32
00:01:39,246 --> 00:01:41,381
Your fancy
gynecologist.
33
00:01:41,448 --> 00:01:43,616
Dr. Crawford.
You got in.
34
00:01:43,684 --> 00:01:44,617
Yup. Thanks
to your referral
35
00:01:44,685 --> 00:01:47,170
and a year
on the waiting list.
36
00:01:47,238 --> 00:01:48,772
So, I'm really
gonna love him?
37
00:01:48,840 --> 00:01:49,989
Carrie,
there are no words.
38
00:01:50,057 --> 00:01:51,358
I mean, it's like you're
not even at an appointment.
39
00:01:51,426 --> 00:01:53,560
It's like
you're having lunch.
40
00:01:53,628 --> 00:01:55,195
I can't wait.
41
00:01:55,262 --> 00:01:57,764
I can't tell you how
many jerks I've been to.
42
00:01:57,832 --> 00:01:58,899
I mean, they
keep you waiting,
43
00:01:58,966 --> 00:02:01,234
they keep their offices at 18 degrees.
44
00:02:01,302 --> 00:02:03,770
You know that one guy
was actually on the phone,
45
00:02:03,838 --> 00:02:06,339
pricing jaguars
while I was...
46
00:02:08,375 --> 00:02:10,644
Ok, you ready?
Here we go. All right.
47
00:02:10,712 --> 00:02:11,945
Get set.
48
00:02:19,186 --> 00:02:20,687
Did it light?
49
00:02:20,755 --> 00:02:23,257
I have no idea.
50
00:02:23,324 --> 00:02:25,191
I see a little,
but I'm not sure if it's-
51
00:02:29,897 --> 00:02:30,830
aah!
52
00:02:30,898 --> 00:02:32,866
Oh, God!
53
00:02:32,934 --> 00:02:36,086
That's it! We're
getting a new grill!
54
00:02:36,154 --> 00:02:38,238
We don't need a new grill.
You just did it wrong.
55
00:02:38,306 --> 00:02:40,723
I don't have
any eyebrows!
56
00:02:40,791 --> 00:02:44,328
All right. We'll get you
a new grill, you whiner.
57
00:02:44,395 --> 00:02:45,696
And it's
out again.
58
00:02:45,763 --> 00:02:47,297
Deac, just give me a hand.
We'll nuke this stuff.
59
00:02:47,365 --> 00:02:48,298
All right.
60
00:02:48,366 --> 00:02:49,299
Thanks.
61
00:02:49,367 --> 00:02:50,300
Hey, Danny.
62
00:02:50,368 --> 00:02:51,301
Hi.
63
00:02:51,369 --> 00:02:52,302
Oh, hey.
64
00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:53,537
Hey. So,
what's goin' on?
65
00:02:53,604 --> 00:02:57,173
You barbecuin'?
Havin' a little party?
66
00:02:57,241 --> 00:03:00,844
No, it's just us
and Deacon and Kelly.
67
00:03:00,912 --> 00:03:02,296
Oh, I get it.
It's a couples thing.
68
00:03:02,363 --> 00:03:06,166
So if I was dating someone,
I would've been invited.
69
00:03:06,233 --> 00:03:09,102
Uh... yeah. Sure.
70
00:03:09,170 --> 00:03:11,955
Cool. Another time, then.
71
00:03:12,023 --> 00:03:13,539
Anyway, I don't
wanna hold you up.
72
00:03:13,607 --> 00:03:15,075
Just wanted you guys
to be the first to know
73
00:03:15,142 --> 00:03:17,743
that I am jumping back into
the small business world.
74
00:03:17,811 --> 00:03:19,295
Great. You got the bankruptcy paperwork
75
00:03:19,364 --> 00:03:21,030
already
filled out or-
76
00:03:21,098 --> 00:03:21,815
would you
stop it?
77
00:03:21,882 --> 00:03:23,099
What are you
doing, hon?
78
00:03:23,167 --> 00:03:25,201
Gonna be doin' a little
landscaping on the side,
79
00:03:25,269 --> 00:03:26,637
like I did in college.
80
00:03:26,704 --> 00:03:28,906
Just, uh, dropping off some
fliers around the neighborhood.
81
00:03:28,973 --> 00:03:30,273
Thought maybe you guys would
hand out a few to your friends.
82
00:03:30,341 --> 00:03:31,374
Oh.
83
00:03:31,442 --> 00:03:34,177
"The garden of weedin'."
84
00:03:40,051 --> 00:03:43,669
What does that mean? You put
weeds into people's gardens?
85
00:03:43,737 --> 00:03:45,354
No, no. I take 'em out.
It's a good thing.
86
00:03:45,422 --> 00:03:47,774
Why would you even wanna
call attention to weeds?
87
00:03:47,842 --> 00:03:49,960
Ok, you're overthinking it. It's catchy.
88
00:03:50,027 --> 00:03:51,328
It is. And you've seen his patio.
89
00:03:51,396 --> 00:03:52,362
It's gorgeous.
90
00:03:52,430 --> 00:03:54,031
I'd be happy to pass
some of these out.
91
00:03:54,098 --> 00:03:55,165
Thank you.
You're welcome.
92
00:03:55,233 --> 00:03:56,599
Ok, we are
good to go.
93
00:03:56,667 --> 00:03:58,101
Cool. Okay.
Make some room.
94
00:03:58,169 --> 00:04:01,571
Whoa! Somethin' smelling
good around here, huh?
95
00:04:01,639 --> 00:04:03,656
What've you got, there?
Some burgers, some chicken?
96
00:04:06,311 --> 00:04:07,560
All right.
I'll let you get to it.
97
00:04:07,628 --> 00:04:08,561
Ok. Good to see you, Danny.
98
00:04:08,629 --> 00:04:09,695
Bye-bye.
99
00:04:11,566 --> 00:04:14,951
And that's it.
We're done here.
100
00:04:15,019 --> 00:04:16,520
Shut up.
101
00:04:16,587 --> 00:04:18,221
It's over?
102
00:04:18,289 --> 00:04:19,406
Yes, ma'am.
103
00:04:19,473 --> 00:04:22,158
My God.
The time just flew by.
104
00:04:22,226 --> 00:04:24,127
Well, I'm glad to hear
it wasn't too bad for you.
105
00:04:24,194 --> 00:04:27,147
Are you kidding me?
The classical music,
106
00:04:27,215 --> 00:04:31,084
the fur-lined stirrups,
and this...
107
00:04:31,152 --> 00:04:33,303
This gown! What is this,
Egyptian cotton?
108
00:04:33,371 --> 00:04:36,089
300-thread count.
109
00:04:36,156 --> 00:04:37,340
Well, can I,
like, buy one?
110
00:04:37,408 --> 00:04:39,375
Do you have a gift
shop here or something?
111
00:04:40,761 --> 00:04:42,162
Hey, you're funny.
112
00:04:42,230 --> 00:04:46,899
And, if I might add, you have
a fabulous uterus to boot.
113
00:04:48,769 --> 00:04:50,603
Thank you.
114
00:04:50,671 --> 00:04:52,205
Dr. Crawford.
115
00:04:52,273 --> 00:04:53,839
Uh, yes,
Marilyn?
116
00:04:53,907 --> 00:04:56,609
Your 11:00 just called.
She's gonna be late.
117
00:04:56,677 --> 00:04:58,144
Sheila carrasco
again?
118
00:04:58,212 --> 00:04:59,412
Yeah.
119
00:04:59,480 --> 00:05:01,948
Tell her she doesn't need
to bother coming in today,
120
00:05:02,015 --> 00:05:03,183
and she
can use the time
121
00:05:03,250 --> 00:05:05,368
to find another
gynecologist.
122
00:05:05,436 --> 00:05:07,554
So, Carrie,
123
00:05:07,622 --> 00:05:09,640
do you have any other questions for me,
124
00:05:09,707 --> 00:05:11,908
or anything else you'd like to discuss?
125
00:05:11,976 --> 00:05:15,779
Well, I'm guessing I shouldn't
be late for my next appointment.
126
00:05:15,846 --> 00:05:17,597
It's not ideal.
127
00:05:17,665 --> 00:05:21,434
Ok. Let me just make a few
notes in your chart here.
128
00:05:21,501 --> 00:05:22,452
All right.
129
00:05:22,603 --> 00:05:23,803
You mind if
I move your purse?
130
00:05:23,870 --> 00:05:24,971
Oh, yeah. Sorry.
131
00:05:25,038 --> 00:05:28,074
"The garden
of weedin'."
132
00:05:28,142 --> 00:05:30,776
What is this,
a landscaper?
133
00:05:30,844 --> 00:05:32,412
Yeah, it's
my husband's cousin.
134
00:05:32,480 --> 00:05:33,463
Oh. Is he good?
135
00:05:33,530 --> 00:05:34,231
Well, he's just, uh,
136
00:05:34,298 --> 00:05:35,415
getting back
into the business,
137
00:05:35,483 --> 00:05:37,083
but he has
a real knack for it.
138
00:05:37,151 --> 00:05:39,352
Huh. That could really
work out well for me.
139
00:05:39,420 --> 00:05:41,388
We need a little work
done on our front yard.
140
00:05:41,456 --> 00:05:44,824
But I only
wanna spend $500.
141
00:05:44,892 --> 00:05:46,626
Give him a call.
Take a flier.
142
00:05:46,693 --> 00:05:48,894
Great. Thanks.
143
00:05:48,962 --> 00:05:50,313
Feel free
to help yourself
144
00:05:50,381 --> 00:05:52,749
to an ice-blended
coffee on your way out.
145
00:06:08,547 --> 00:06:11,199
You know that's not a TV
you're watching, right?
146
00:06:11,267 --> 00:06:13,434
Ha ha ha! Good one.
147
00:06:14,436 --> 00:06:15,904
Actually, for
your information,
148
00:06:15,972 --> 00:06:18,040
I'm on-line doing
a little research.
149
00:06:18,107 --> 00:06:21,943
"Adventures
in meat.Com."
150
00:06:22,011 --> 00:06:23,411
It's the charmaster
web site.
151
00:06:23,479 --> 00:06:26,614
I'm taking a virtual tour of
the 6-burner platinum edition.
152
00:06:26,683 --> 00:06:28,316
Where's the grill?
153
00:06:28,384 --> 00:06:31,036
We're in it.
It's a steak-eye view.
154
00:06:32,638 --> 00:06:35,073
Look at this. We're
zooming into the drip tray
155
00:06:35,141 --> 00:06:37,208
and back up
to the lava rocks.
156
00:06:37,276 --> 00:06:40,145
Drip tray,
lava rocks.
157
00:06:40,212 --> 00:06:42,347
Feels sexy,
don't it?
158
00:06:42,414 --> 00:06:44,750
Would you just pick one
of these freaking things
159
00:06:44,817 --> 00:06:46,184
and just buy it?
160
00:06:47,520 --> 00:06:49,955
Hello?
161
00:06:50,023 --> 00:06:51,773
Oh, hi,
Dr. Crawford.
162
00:06:51,841 --> 00:06:53,525
Look. Look. Look.
Sauce warmer.
163
00:06:53,593 --> 00:06:54,842
Corn-cob caddy.
164
00:06:54,910 --> 00:06:58,163
Shh! It's
my new gynecologist.
165
00:06:59,415 --> 00:07:00,582
Hey, Doug.
Is Arthur home?
166
00:07:00,649 --> 00:07:02,117
No, he's out now.
167
00:07:02,184 --> 00:07:04,319
Oh, ok. Can you see that he gets this?
168
00:07:04,386 --> 00:07:05,787
A slim-Jim?
169
00:07:05,855 --> 00:07:08,123
Yeah. Yeah, he brought
one on our walk today,
170
00:07:08,191 --> 00:07:09,791
and a couple of the dogs tag-teamed him
171
00:07:09,859 --> 00:07:11,526
and took it away.
172
00:07:12,562 --> 00:07:14,729
You made a special trip
for this?
173
00:07:14,797 --> 00:07:17,015
He was
pretty insistent.
174
00:07:17,082 --> 00:07:18,916
Ok, I'll
pass it on.
175
00:07:18,984 --> 00:07:20,252
Great, thanks.
176
00:07:20,319 --> 00:07:21,720
Oh, hey, hol.
Hey.
177
00:07:21,788 --> 00:07:24,690
That was Dr. Crawford
calling to tell me
178
00:07:24,757 --> 00:07:27,258
what a great job Danny
did on his front yard.
179
00:07:27,326 --> 00:07:29,528
I guess somebody
was wrong about him.
180
00:07:29,595 --> 00:07:31,763
Ok, my idiot cousin
can dig a ditch.
181
00:07:31,830 --> 00:07:34,432
Oh, how
I've misjudged him.
182
00:07:35,401 --> 00:07:37,286
Did you just
say Dr. Crawford,
183
00:07:37,353 --> 00:07:39,354
as in
Dr. Roy Crawford?
184
00:07:39,422 --> 00:07:41,056
Is he
your gynecologist?
185
00:07:41,124 --> 00:07:42,624
Yeah.
186
00:07:42,692 --> 00:07:44,593
Gosh, I hear
he's the best.
187
00:07:44,660 --> 00:07:46,428
I mean, is there any
way you could get me in?
188
00:07:46,496 --> 00:07:49,431
Why? What's wrong
with your guy?
189
00:07:49,499 --> 00:07:52,033
Dr. ambrose? Well, I saw
him a couple of times,
190
00:07:52,102 --> 00:07:55,737
and then he kept
calling me late at night.
191
00:07:56,872 --> 00:07:57,905
I mean, is there
any way you could
192
00:07:57,973 --> 00:07:59,941
put in a good word
for me with Crawford?
193
00:08:00,009 --> 00:08:01,843
Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Um.
194
00:08:01,911 --> 00:08:03,412
No. No.
195
00:08:03,479 --> 00:08:04,563
Well-
I can't.
196
00:08:04,631 --> 00:08:05,647
If you just-
I don't want to.
197
00:08:05,715 --> 00:08:06,815
It won't
take 2 seconds.
198
00:08:06,882 --> 00:08:07,816
I just
don't want to.
199
00:08:07,883 --> 00:08:08,917
Ok, thank you.
Ok. All right.
200
00:08:08,985 --> 00:08:10,252
Thanks very much.
Thanks.
201
00:08:14,140 --> 00:08:15,390
Your boyfriend's here.
202
00:08:19,829 --> 00:08:21,163
Hey, what's up?
203
00:08:21,230 --> 00:08:22,146
Just came by
to thank you
204
00:08:22,298 --> 00:08:23,398
for hooking me up with the good doctor.
205
00:08:23,465 --> 00:08:24,399
Oh, yeah! I just got
off the phone with him.
206
00:08:24,466 --> 00:08:25,400
He's thrilled.
207
00:08:25,467 --> 00:08:26,401
I know.
208
00:08:26,468 --> 00:08:27,568
And as a token
of my appreciation,
209
00:08:27,636 --> 00:08:30,172
I bought you
a prunus persica.
210
00:08:30,239 --> 00:08:33,608
Or, as you kids call it, an apple tree.
211
00:08:33,676 --> 00:08:35,444
Sweet. You can never
have too many apples.
212
00:08:35,512 --> 00:08:38,947
And you're gonna be buried
in them in about 18 years.
213
00:08:39,015 --> 00:08:40,715
Well, I'm glad
this worked out.
214
00:08:40,783 --> 00:08:42,500
Yeah. Thanks to you, I'm
really getting legit here.
215
00:08:42,568 --> 00:08:44,235
Like an actual business!
216
00:08:44,303 --> 00:08:46,805
Dr. Crawford
will receive his bill
217
00:08:46,872 --> 00:08:50,108
on official garden
of weedin' stationery.
218
00:08:50,175 --> 00:08:52,043
Look, I even
got my own logo.
219
00:08:53,312 --> 00:08:55,012
Is that a drawing
of you naked?
220
00:08:56,449 --> 00:08:58,650
No, that's me with a
really big green thumb.
221
00:09:03,856 --> 00:09:06,958
Wait a minute.
This bill is for $958.
222
00:09:07,026 --> 00:09:08,326
Yeah? So?
So?
223
00:09:08,394 --> 00:09:10,445
He only wanted
to spend $500.
224
00:09:10,513 --> 00:09:12,497
The job ran over.
It happens.
225
00:09:12,565 --> 00:09:14,799
Ok. He's gonna freak
out when he sees this.
226
00:09:14,867 --> 00:09:16,517
He can freak out
all he wants.
227
00:09:16,585 --> 00:09:20,822
He got his hedges.
Now I gets my cabbage.
228
00:09:20,889 --> 00:09:23,124
Yeah, and he
drops me as a patient
229
00:09:23,192 --> 00:09:24,292
'cause he's gonna
blame me for this.
230
00:09:24,360 --> 00:09:26,394
Oh, come on.
No, I'm serious.
231
00:09:26,462 --> 00:09:28,313
You don't
cross this guy, ok?
232
00:09:28,380 --> 00:09:30,115
Sorry, pal. You're
only charging him $500.
233
00:09:30,183 --> 00:09:31,149
I can't do that.
234
00:09:31,217 --> 00:09:32,017
You're doing it.
235
00:09:32,084 --> 00:09:33,602
I can't! I
already owe it all!
236
00:09:33,669 --> 00:09:36,004
I got all these plants on
credit from the nursery.
237
00:09:36,072 --> 00:09:36,855
I gotta pay my workers.
238
00:09:36,922 --> 00:09:38,774
This thing alone
was $63.
239
00:09:38,841 --> 00:09:40,576
You charged him
for my apple tree?!
240
00:09:40,643 --> 00:09:43,862
It's how
the business works!
241
00:09:43,930 --> 00:09:45,563
You're a moron!
242
00:09:45,631 --> 00:09:47,299
Don't let me
bother you, kids.
243
00:09:47,367 --> 00:09:49,401
Just measuring out
a new spot for my grill.
244
00:09:49,469 --> 00:09:51,453
Sorry, Carrie. The bill
is what it is, all right?
245
00:09:51,521 --> 00:09:53,538
I'm not doing this for
charity. I'm a businessman.
246
00:09:53,606 --> 00:09:55,373
Well, fine. I'm just gonna call
him and tell him not to pay you.
247
00:09:55,441 --> 00:09:56,708
Well, then,
I'll sue him.
248
00:09:56,776 --> 00:09:58,009
Or, better yet,
I'll go to his house
249
00:09:58,076 --> 00:09:59,277
and rip out
all my plants.
250
00:09:59,345 --> 00:10:00,278
Pardon me.
251
00:10:00,346 --> 00:10:01,613
I can't believe you!
252
00:10:01,681 --> 00:10:02,881
Yeah, well,
believe it, baby.
253
00:10:04,450 --> 00:10:07,636
I'm gonna lose
my gynecologist.
254
00:10:07,703 --> 00:10:09,938
Holly's guy
sounded pretty good.
255
00:10:19,716 --> 00:10:21,316
Hey, hon.
256
00:10:21,383 --> 00:10:22,951
Watching a Western?
257
00:10:23,019 --> 00:10:24,786
Yeah.
258
00:10:24,854 --> 00:10:26,938
Who made
saloon furniture?
259
00:10:27,006 --> 00:10:30,775
Never really held up
during a fight.
260
00:10:30,843 --> 00:10:32,043
And those banisters,
261
00:10:32,111 --> 00:10:33,945
what's the point
of even having one?
262
00:10:35,398 --> 00:10:37,799
Ha ha!
263
00:10:37,866 --> 00:10:40,735
That's why I love you. I never
know what you're gonna say.
264
00:10:44,006 --> 00:10:46,441
Okay,
what do you want?
265
00:10:49,178 --> 00:10:49,878
Here's the thing.
266
00:10:49,946 --> 00:10:51,896
I don't know
if you heard
267
00:10:51,964 --> 00:10:53,432
what went down
with Danny and I,
268
00:10:53,499 --> 00:10:56,168
but it turns out he's gonna
overcharge my gynecologist
269
00:10:56,235 --> 00:10:57,869
by, like, $400.
270
00:10:57,937 --> 00:10:59,237
Yeah?
271
00:10:59,304 --> 00:11:01,055
Ok, now, I'm just throwing
this out there, ok?
272
00:11:01,123 --> 00:11:05,093
I'm just spitballing. I want you
to keep an open mind, all right?
273
00:11:05,161 --> 00:11:07,713
I want us to pay
the extra $400.
274
00:11:13,503 --> 00:11:15,086
Ok, cool.
All right.
275
00:11:15,153 --> 00:11:16,388
So I'm just gonna
go scoot on down
276
00:11:16,455 --> 00:11:17,605
to the atm,
all right?
277
00:11:17,673 --> 00:11:19,491
And I'll see you
in a minute.
278
00:11:19,558 --> 00:11:22,594
Saloon furniture.
You're crazy, man!
279
00:11:22,661 --> 00:11:23,361
Hey! Hey!
280
00:11:23,429 --> 00:11:24,613
You don't gotta
go to the atm,
281
00:11:24,680 --> 00:11:26,114
I got it right here.
I got it right here.
282
00:11:26,182 --> 00:11:27,382
Not a problem.
283
00:11:27,450 --> 00:11:30,786
Here it is,
100, 200, 300,
284
00:11:30,853 --> 00:11:32,788
no hundred ever.
285
00:11:33,973 --> 00:11:36,291
Come on, Doug!
286
00:11:36,359 --> 00:11:37,892
No, it's insane. I'm not
paying for Danny's screwup.
287
00:11:37,960 --> 00:11:39,177
Let Danny pay for it.
288
00:11:39,245 --> 00:11:40,578
He can't pay for it.
He doesn't have the money.
289
00:11:40,646 --> 00:11:41,980
Besides,
he's a loose Cannon.
290
00:11:42,047 --> 00:11:44,916
He could freak out and leave
a dead shrub in the guy's bed.
291
00:11:44,984 --> 00:11:47,435
Let me just get
the 500 from Crawford,
292
00:11:47,503 --> 00:11:49,003
put it
in with our money,
293
00:11:49,071 --> 00:11:50,472
and I'll give it
all to Danny.
294
00:11:50,539 --> 00:11:53,174
Nobody has to know anything,
and everybody's happy.
295
00:11:53,242 --> 00:11:55,343
Except for chubby.
296
00:11:56,529 --> 00:11:59,480
Doug... please.
297
00:11:59,549 --> 00:12:03,251
I cannot lose
this gynecologist.
298
00:12:03,318 --> 00:12:04,903
What is it
about this guy?
299
00:12:04,971 --> 00:12:08,339
What-what goes on
in that room?
300
00:12:09,208 --> 00:12:11,493
I don't know.
It's everything.
301
00:12:11,561 --> 00:12:14,229
I mean, even the
lighting in there, Doug.
302
00:12:14,296 --> 00:12:16,598
I stayed after
to redo my makeup,
303
00:12:16,666 --> 00:12:20,235
and it came out perfect.
304
00:12:20,302 --> 00:12:24,473
Well, maybe losing your gynecologist
is a good lesson for you.
305
00:12:24,540 --> 00:12:27,376
Maybe next time you wanna
do something nice for Danny,
306
00:12:27,443 --> 00:12:30,612
you'll think to yourself,
"ooh. Last time I did this,
307
00:12:30,680 --> 00:12:34,082
I lost my gynecologist."
308
00:12:34,149 --> 00:12:37,052
Look, I know in a logical
world, it makes no sense,
309
00:12:37,119 --> 00:12:39,387
but I think if you were a
woman, you would understand.
310
00:12:39,455 --> 00:12:41,122
Even if we do
pay the 400 bucks,
311
00:12:41,189 --> 00:12:43,425
that's all the extra money
we got lying around, you know?
312
00:12:43,492 --> 00:12:45,192
How am I gonna
pay for my grill?
313
00:12:45,260 --> 00:12:46,595
Yeah.
314
00:12:46,662 --> 00:12:49,030
Oh... my God.
315
00:12:49,098 --> 00:12:51,332
Come on. We'll just
cancel the new one,
316
00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:52,667
and I'll
light the old one.
317
00:12:52,735 --> 00:12:54,702
You never
have to touch it.
318
00:12:54,770 --> 00:12:56,254
Great, so I'll still
have my crappy old grill
319
00:12:56,321 --> 00:13:00,075
and a wife
with a smoking head.
320
00:13:01,277 --> 00:13:03,178
Sorry, toots.
Ain't gonna happen.
321
00:13:06,565 --> 00:13:10,968
Hey. Uh, I gotta talk to you about
this danny/ gynecologist thing.
322
00:13:11,036 --> 00:13:12,470
Hey, did you hear about
that? Carrie wants us
323
00:13:12,538 --> 00:13:15,173
to pay $400 to Danny,
man. Freakin' crazy.
324
00:13:15,241 --> 00:13:16,607
Yeah, crazy.
325
00:13:16,675 --> 00:13:18,926
I'm gonna need you
to pay that.
326
00:13:18,994 --> 00:13:21,362
What? Why
should I pay it?
327
00:13:21,430 --> 00:13:22,180
Because your cousin
was referred
328
00:13:22,248 --> 00:13:23,665
to Dr. Crawford
by your wife,
329
00:13:23,733 --> 00:13:25,099
who was referred
by my wife,
330
00:13:25,167 --> 00:13:26,401
and now
my wife's hysterical
331
00:13:26,469 --> 00:13:27,569
that if this thing
blows up,
332
00:13:27,637 --> 00:13:29,103
she's going down
with Carrie.
333
00:13:29,171 --> 00:13:32,307
What is wrong
with you people?
334
00:13:32,374 --> 00:13:34,259
Look, all I know is I just
got back together with Kelly.
335
00:13:34,327 --> 00:13:35,360
I don't need her
running around
336
00:13:35,428 --> 00:13:37,562
crying about losing
her gynecologist.
337
00:13:37,630 --> 00:13:39,030
Sorry, dude,
I can't do it.
338
00:13:39,098 --> 00:13:41,433
Oh, you're doing it.
339
00:13:41,500 --> 00:13:42,784
Oh, really?
You're gonna make me?
340
00:13:42,852 --> 00:13:44,719
Maybe I will.
341
00:13:44,787 --> 00:13:46,921
All right,
then let's go.
342
00:13:46,989 --> 00:13:48,072
Ow!
343
00:13:49,959 --> 00:13:51,542
You said let's go!
344
00:13:51,610 --> 00:13:53,795
Did not expect that!
345
00:13:53,863 --> 00:13:55,479
I'm sorry, man.
346
00:13:55,547 --> 00:13:58,283
Look, I'm just trying to put
my marriage back together here.
347
00:13:58,350 --> 00:13:59,483
Fine!
I'll do it.
348
00:13:59,551 --> 00:14:01,152
Thank you.
349
00:14:01,220 --> 00:14:02,820
What is it
with this doctor?
350
00:14:02,888 --> 00:14:04,488
What do they love
so much about him?
351
00:14:04,556 --> 00:14:06,624
I don't know.
He-he's soothing.
352
00:14:06,691 --> 00:14:08,759
He puts them at ease.
353
00:14:10,762 --> 00:14:13,031
He's like
the vagina whisperer.
354
00:14:27,628 --> 00:14:29,362
Hey.
355
00:14:30,965 --> 00:14:32,899
How's it going?
356
00:14:34,969 --> 00:14:38,304
Don't worry. Nobody's
trying to light you.
357
00:14:39,574 --> 00:14:41,842
Just gonna
check out your gas flow.
358
00:14:44,579 --> 00:14:47,714
So... how about
them Knicks, huh?
359
00:14:49,851 --> 00:14:51,051
I tell you,
I think this year
360
00:14:51,119 --> 00:14:53,120
they're looking
pretty good if they-
361
00:14:58,159 --> 00:15:00,093
I will see you
in hell.
362
00:15:02,063 --> 00:15:04,464
Hi, honey.
What are you doing?
363
00:15:04,532 --> 00:15:06,733
Oh, just trying to
cook dinner and not die.
364
00:15:06,801 --> 00:15:08,735
Look, I know
you hate this grill,
365
00:15:08,803 --> 00:15:10,971
but everything
worked out great.
366
00:15:11,039 --> 00:15:13,006
Danny thinks Dr. Crawford
paid for the whole thing.
367
00:15:13,074 --> 00:15:15,142
Dr. Crawford thinks
he only paid $500.
368
00:15:15,209 --> 00:15:17,811
It's over. And
I promise you next year,
369
00:15:17,879 --> 00:15:19,880
I will buy you
an even better grill.
370
00:15:19,947 --> 00:15:21,164
Stop saying grill.
371
00:15:21,232 --> 00:15:24,100
All right, I'm gonna go
cook this meat inside, ok?
372
00:15:26,137 --> 00:15:28,272
Aah!
373
00:15:33,244 --> 00:15:35,044
Honey, there's a message
on the machine.
374
00:15:35,112 --> 00:15:36,513
Did you check it?
No!
375
00:15:38,649 --> 00:15:39,849
Greetings, Americans,
376
00:15:39,917 --> 00:15:42,652
and welcome
to today's moron report.
377
00:15:42,720 --> 00:15:45,021
Seems Dr. Crawford
was so happy with the job
378
00:15:45,089 --> 00:15:47,524
this moron did
in his front yard
379
00:15:47,592 --> 00:15:50,994
that he just hired him
to do his whole backyard.
380
00:15:52,163 --> 00:15:53,997
Huh! Guess he didn't
have any problem
381
00:15:54,064 --> 00:15:55,865
with the $900 after all.
382
00:15:55,933 --> 00:15:58,868
Ooh! File this
under "burned."
383
00:16:00,838 --> 00:16:03,357
Ow! What was that for?
384
00:16:03,424 --> 00:16:04,791
You're gonna call
Dr. Crawford.
385
00:16:04,859 --> 00:16:07,194
You're gonna tell him you're
sick, tell him you died,
386
00:16:07,262 --> 00:16:09,963
tell him you sliced off your
foot with a garden weasel.
387
00:16:10,031 --> 00:16:11,531
Just get out of it.
388
00:16:11,599 --> 00:16:13,450
Why should I get out
of it? The guy loves me.
389
00:16:13,517 --> 00:16:15,685
He couldn't have been
happier with the job I did.
390
00:16:15,752 --> 00:16:18,988
Because he thought
it cost $500.
391
00:16:19,056 --> 00:16:21,307
What are you talking
about? He paid me 900.
392
00:16:21,375 --> 00:16:22,559
No, he paid you 500,
393
00:16:22,627 --> 00:16:25,061
and Doug and I paid the
rest out of our pockets.
394
00:16:25,129 --> 00:16:26,846
You did?
Yeah.
395
00:16:26,914 --> 00:16:30,149
So Crawford thought I did
all that work for just 500?
396
00:16:30,217 --> 00:16:32,485
Again, yeah.
397
00:16:32,553 --> 00:16:34,287
Uh-oh.
398
00:16:34,355 --> 00:16:37,023
Uh-oh? Uh-oh what?
399
00:16:37,091 --> 00:16:40,493
W
- well, I thought he was fine paying double the estimate,
400
00:16:40,561 --> 00:16:42,829
so I thought
I'd give triple a shot.
401
00:16:42,897 --> 00:16:46,499
Oh, my God! You are the
stupidest person alive!
402
00:16:46,567 --> 00:16:48,134
I don't suppose
you guys would be willing
403
00:16:48,202 --> 00:16:49,769
to pay the difference
one more time, would you?
404
00:16:49,837 --> 00:16:52,405
Ow! Same one!
405
00:16:52,473 --> 00:16:55,508
Would you please get your
goldfish out of my bathtub?
406
00:16:55,576 --> 00:16:56,977
All right, they're
not goldfish, ok?
407
00:16:57,044 --> 00:16:58,277
They're Japanese kol,
408
00:16:58,345 --> 00:17:00,346
and they're really
expensive, so hands off.
409
00:17:00,414 --> 00:17:03,182
Whoa, whoa. Are those
kol for Dr. Crawford?
410
00:17:03,250 --> 00:17:05,318
Yeah.
Did he ask for kol?
411
00:17:05,385 --> 00:17:07,353
Not in so many words.
412
00:17:07,421 --> 00:17:09,156
It's one word!
413
00:17:09,223 --> 00:17:10,623
About my bath?
414
00:17:10,691 --> 00:17:12,492
Is this the way
you take a bath?
415
00:17:12,559 --> 00:17:13,693
Yeah.
416
00:17:13,761 --> 00:17:16,529
You look like Ernie from sesame street.
417
00:17:16,597 --> 00:17:17,764
What did I
do to you?
418
00:17:17,832 --> 00:17:19,565
I don't.
- nothing. I'm sorry.
419
00:17:19,633 --> 00:17:21,401
What was I thinking?
420
00:17:21,468 --> 00:17:23,203
I- I can't run
a business.
421
00:17:23,271 --> 00:17:26,572
Oh, man! Why did I listen
to that fortune cookie?!
422
00:17:26,640 --> 00:17:27,840
I hate me!
423
00:17:27,908 --> 00:17:29,542
All right, all right!
Pull yourself together here.
424
00:17:29,610 --> 00:17:31,644
Call Dr. Crawford.
I will dial.
425
00:17:31,712 --> 00:17:32,679
All right, but I'll
tell you right now.
426
00:17:32,746 --> 00:17:34,214
He's gonna
be pretty pissed.
427
00:17:34,282 --> 00:17:35,282
I already
dug up his yard
428
00:17:35,349 --> 00:17:37,350
and I may have cut
his phone line.
429
00:17:38,752 --> 00:17:42,022
Ok, Danny. I guess you have
to go through with this.
430
00:17:42,089 --> 00:17:44,724
But here's how
it's gonna go down.
431
00:17:44,792 --> 00:17:46,359
Look at me.
I can't.
432
00:17:46,427 --> 00:17:48,862
Look at me!
433
00:17:48,930 --> 00:17:50,297
You're gonna give him
434
00:17:50,364 --> 00:17:52,332
exactly what he asked for
435
00:17:52,399 --> 00:17:55,802
for exactly the amount you
told him it was gonna cost,
436
00:17:55,870 --> 00:17:58,939
and it's gonna be
friggin' gorgeous,
437
00:17:59,006 --> 00:18:02,375
or I'm gonna give you
a gynecological exam.
438
00:18:10,818 --> 00:18:11,718
Yeah.
439
00:18:11,786 --> 00:18:13,286
It was funny.
440
00:18:13,354 --> 00:18:14,354
Hey, nice job
up there
441
00:18:14,421 --> 00:18:15,956
with the karaoke,
my friend.
442
00:18:16,023 --> 00:18:18,959
Oh, thanks, man. And I
wasn't just talking smack.
443
00:18:19,026 --> 00:18:20,961
You do have
Bette Davis eyes.
444
00:18:25,199 --> 00:18:27,700
Carrie, this is
Dr. Crawford.
445
00:18:27,768 --> 00:18:30,737
Sorry about the connection.
I'm on my cell.
446
00:18:30,804 --> 00:18:33,373
Something's wrong
with my home phone.
447
00:18:33,440 --> 00:18:34,741
Anyway,
I'm just calling
448
00:18:34,808 --> 00:18:36,609
because Danny
dug up my yard,
449
00:18:36,677 --> 00:18:39,045
but I haven't been able
to get a hold of him since.
450
00:18:39,113 --> 00:18:41,447
I'm going out of town
tonight until Monday,
451
00:18:41,515 --> 00:18:45,118
but if you speak to him,
please leave me a message.
452
00:18:45,186 --> 00:18:48,755
Thanks. Bye!
453
00:18:48,822 --> 00:18:51,057
You let your cousin
do another job for him?
454
00:18:51,125 --> 00:18:53,075
I didn't know until
after he started it.
455
00:18:53,143 --> 00:18:54,160
Well, where is he?
456
00:19:09,326 --> 00:19:13,162
Ok. It's 1 A.M. I'm standing
in your gynecologist's backyard
457
00:19:13,230 --> 00:19:16,199
planting a pear tree.
458
00:19:16,266 --> 00:19:18,067
That's right.
And after this,
459
00:19:18,135 --> 00:19:20,403
we have a whole row of
morning glories to plant,
460
00:19:20,471 --> 00:19:21,638
so keep it moving.
461
00:19:21,706 --> 00:19:23,573
Why the hell am I pushing
the damn wheelbarrow?
462
00:19:23,641 --> 00:19:24,641
He's your doctor!
463
00:19:24,709 --> 00:19:26,609
Just keep it down.
How's it going?
464
00:19:26,677 --> 00:19:28,411
Not good. I don't know
what I'm looking at here.
465
00:19:28,479 --> 00:19:29,512
I think
I'm gonna cry.
466
00:19:31,281 --> 00:19:32,449
Deacon,
what are you doing?
467
00:19:32,516 --> 00:19:33,516
Relax.
The guy's out of town.
468
00:19:33,584 --> 00:19:34,951
I just want
to check out his place.
469
00:19:35,018 --> 00:19:37,304
What's he got
going on in there?
470
00:19:37,371 --> 00:19:39,973
Oh, my God! He's
got vaginas in jars!
471
00:19:42,609 --> 00:19:45,045
I think
those are peaches.
472
00:19:49,850 --> 00:19:51,517
Oh.
473
00:19:51,585 --> 00:19:53,253
Oh, yeah, yeah.
474
00:19:53,321 --> 00:19:55,204
Can you guys get
back to work, please?
475
00:19:55,272 --> 00:19:56,722
Aw, man.
476
00:19:56,791 --> 00:19:59,259
I never felt like
less of a man in my life.
477
00:20:01,195 --> 00:20:03,596
Oh, this is
just a joke!
478
00:20:03,664 --> 00:20:05,932
Turn it off!
479
00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:08,435
I don't know where.
- It's probably on a timer!
480
00:20:08,503 --> 00:20:10,370
You guys, don't worry
about it. Just keep digging.
481
00:20:10,438 --> 00:20:12,005
What?! What? It's just water!
482
00:20:12,072 --> 00:20:13,523
What are you,
a big baby?
483
00:20:13,591 --> 00:20:16,125
Oh, my God,
look at this!
484
00:20:16,193 --> 00:20:19,462
He's got the charmaster
8000! He's got my grill!
485
00:20:22,132 --> 00:20:25,735
With a patriots logo!
That is so wrong!
486
00:20:32,059 --> 00:20:33,560
And that's it.
487
00:20:33,627 --> 00:20:35,562
We are done here.
488
00:20:35,629 --> 00:20:37,363
Really?
489
00:20:37,431 --> 00:20:41,401
Wow. That was delightful.
490
00:20:41,468 --> 00:20:43,053
Super.
491
00:20:43,120 --> 00:20:45,071
I can't tell you
how happy I am
492
00:20:45,139 --> 00:20:47,073
that I don't have to go
to Dr. ambrose anymore.
493
00:20:47,141 --> 00:20:48,808
Thank you so much
for fitting me in.
494
00:20:48,876 --> 00:20:51,294
Well, normally you'd have
to wait at least a year,
495
00:20:51,362 --> 00:20:54,164
but you called
on the right day.
496
00:20:54,231 --> 00:20:56,766
I came home early from
my vacation last night
497
00:20:56,834 --> 00:20:58,902
and found
2 of my patients
498
00:20:58,970 --> 00:21:01,404
soaking wet, standing
in a hole in my backyard
499
00:21:01,472 --> 00:21:05,141
slapping each other.
Can you imagine?
500
00:21:05,209 --> 00:21:08,161
There are a lot of
sick people in this world.
501
00:21:19,339 --> 00:21:20,540
Hello?
502
00:21:20,608 --> 00:21:22,008
Hello, Carrie?
503
00:21:22,075 --> 00:21:25,044
This is Dr. ambrose.
504
00:21:25,112 --> 00:21:27,313
Oh, hi.
505
00:21:27,381 --> 00:21:29,081
What's up?
35809
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