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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,502 --> 00:00:03,537 - wa-cha! Hiya! 2 00:00:03,571 --> 00:00:05,639 - and now... 3 00:00:05,673 --> 00:00:10,678 Dreamworks' kung fu panda: Legends of awesomeness. 4 00:00:10,711 --> 00:00:12,180 [gong rings] 5 00:00:12,213 --> 00:00:14,482 - * hear the legends Of the kung fu panda * 6 00:00:14,515 --> 00:00:18,119 [scatting] 7 00:00:18,152 --> 00:00:19,420 * raised in A noodle shop * 8 00:00:19,453 --> 00:00:21,489 * never seeking Glory or fame * 9 00:00:21,522 --> 00:00:22,823 * he climbed The mountaintop * 10 00:00:22,856 --> 00:00:25,226 * and earned The dragon warrior name * 11 00:00:25,259 --> 00:00:26,427 Ooh! Ahh! Yah! 12 00:00:26,460 --> 00:00:28,229 * kung fu panda 13 00:00:28,262 --> 00:00:31,199 [scatting] 14 00:00:31,232 --> 00:00:34,268 * master shifu saw The warrior blossom * 15 00:00:34,302 --> 00:00:36,404 * and master the skills 16 00:00:36,437 --> 00:00:38,172 * of bodacious and awesome 17 00:00:38,206 --> 00:00:40,108 * kung fu panda 18 00:00:40,141 --> 00:00:42,143 [scatting] 19 00:00:42,176 --> 00:00:45,346 * he lives and he trains And he fights * 20 00:00:45,379 --> 00:00:46,847 * with the furious five 21 00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:48,182 * protect the valley Something something * 22 00:00:48,216 --> 00:00:50,084 * something Something alive * 23 00:00:50,118 --> 00:00:51,085 Ooh! Ah! Ungh! 24 00:00:51,119 --> 00:00:54,722 * kung fu panda 25 00:00:54,755 --> 00:00:56,590 * legends of awesomeness 26 00:00:56,624 --> 00:00:58,126 Sweet! 27 00:01:11,239 --> 00:01:13,607 - yoga begins By centering your energy. 28 00:01:13,641 --> 00:01:14,775 - gah! 29 00:01:14,808 --> 00:01:17,145 - only then can you allow The chi to flow 30 00:01:17,145 --> 00:01:21,415 In, down, And back out. 31 00:01:21,449 --> 00:01:25,286 - [grunting] 32 00:01:25,319 --> 00:01:26,654 - breathing is key. 33 00:01:26,687 --> 00:01:28,789 - breathe. How's this? 34 00:01:28,822 --> 00:01:30,158 [takes a deep breath] 35 00:01:30,191 --> 00:01:31,492 - breathe out. - [exhales heavily] 36 00:01:31,525 --> 00:01:33,727 - breathe in. 37 00:01:33,761 --> 00:01:35,229 Breathe out. 38 00:01:35,263 --> 00:01:36,764 Breathe in. 39 00:01:36,797 --> 00:01:38,166 Breathe out. 40 00:01:38,199 --> 00:01:44,272 - [groaning] 41 00:01:49,477 --> 00:01:51,312 I feel like I'm breathing too much. 42 00:01:51,345 --> 00:01:53,781 Passing out. 43 00:01:56,650 --> 00:01:58,852 That was Awesome! 44 00:01:58,886 --> 00:02:00,588 I do feel At peace. 45 00:02:00,621 --> 00:02:01,755 - master shifu! 46 00:02:01,789 --> 00:02:06,427 There's an urgent message For mantis. 47 00:02:06,460 --> 00:02:10,364 [rattling] 48 00:02:12,200 --> 00:02:13,601 - what does it say? 49 00:02:13,634 --> 00:02:15,336 - it says "Need your help. 50 00:02:15,369 --> 00:02:16,504 "Urgent. 51 00:02:16,537 --> 00:02:17,671 Hao ming." 52 00:02:17,705 --> 00:02:19,307 [gasps] Hao ming! 53 00:02:19,340 --> 00:02:20,341 - what's a hao ming? 54 00:02:20,374 --> 00:02:24,345 - she's the most beautiful Mantis in the world. 55 00:02:24,378 --> 00:02:25,313 And my ex-fiancée. 56 00:02:25,346 --> 00:02:26,714 - wait, what? 57 00:02:26,747 --> 00:02:28,216 You were Gonna get married? 58 00:02:28,249 --> 00:02:30,218 - yeah. But it didn't work out. 59 00:02:30,218 --> 00:02:31,485 She must be In trouble. 60 00:02:31,519 --> 00:02:33,321 I need to go back To my village. 61 00:02:33,354 --> 00:02:35,223 - we'll go with you. 62 00:02:35,223 --> 00:02:36,324 - uh, hmm... 63 00:02:36,357 --> 00:02:38,259 You know what? That's okay. 64 00:02:38,292 --> 00:02:40,528 My village doesn't really Like snakes. 65 00:02:40,561 --> 00:02:42,230 Sorry, or tigers. 66 00:02:42,230 --> 00:02:44,498 Or monkeys Or...Cranes. 67 00:02:44,532 --> 00:02:46,267 It's a really small town. 68 00:02:46,300 --> 00:02:47,268 - what about me? 69 00:02:47,301 --> 00:02:48,269 Can... - no. 70 00:02:48,302 --> 00:02:49,270 - I... - no. 71 00:02:49,303 --> 00:02:50,271 - please? - no! 72 00:02:50,304 --> 00:02:51,705 - you don't even know What I'm going to say. 73 00:02:51,739 --> 00:02:53,241 - you want to come. 74 00:02:53,241 --> 00:02:54,141 - love to. 75 00:02:54,242 --> 00:02:59,880 - [sighs] Really it's best if I go alone. 76 00:02:59,913 --> 00:03:01,749 - huh. That's weird. 77 00:03:01,782 --> 00:03:04,252 I mean, who wouldn't wanna bring The dragon warrior 78 00:03:04,252 --> 00:03:05,886 Back to their hometown With them? 79 00:03:05,919 --> 00:03:07,921 - po, follow mantis 80 00:03:07,955 --> 00:03:09,390 In case he needs Back up. 81 00:03:09,423 --> 00:03:12,260 - ooh, dragon warrior Stealth mode. 82 00:03:12,293 --> 00:03:14,828 Quiet like a cat. 83 00:03:14,862 --> 00:03:16,264 - [growls] 84 00:03:16,297 --> 00:03:19,400 - heh, see? Quiet? 85 00:03:19,433 --> 00:03:23,304 Bye. 86 00:03:25,406 --> 00:03:27,875 - hmm? 87 00:03:27,908 --> 00:03:31,579 Wait. Huh? 88 00:03:33,581 --> 00:03:36,517 [suspenseful music] 89 00:03:36,550 --> 00:03:40,421 * 90 00:03:40,454 --> 00:03:44,358 - whoosh! [scatting] 91 00:03:44,392 --> 00:03:45,893 [yelps] 92 00:03:45,926 --> 00:03:48,329 Hmm. 93 00:03:54,802 --> 00:03:57,405 [groans] 94 00:03:57,438 --> 00:04:01,375 Stealth mode dragon warrior Mental stealth log, entry one. 95 00:04:01,409 --> 00:04:04,312 I've been following mantis For a day and a half now. 96 00:04:04,345 --> 00:04:05,379 And he has no idea. 97 00:04:05,413 --> 00:04:07,815 - po. 98 00:04:07,848 --> 00:04:08,882 - oh! [chuckles nervously] 99 00:04:08,916 --> 00:04:10,584 Hey, mantis. 100 00:04:10,618 --> 00:04:11,819 What is-- I was-- 101 00:04:11,852 --> 00:04:13,721 Hey, what are you doing All the way out here? 102 00:04:13,754 --> 00:04:14,822 - [growls] 103 00:04:14,855 --> 00:04:15,923 Talk! 104 00:04:15,956 --> 00:04:17,358 - shifu wanted me To follow you. 105 00:04:17,391 --> 00:04:18,626 Guess he thought Something was up. 106 00:04:18,659 --> 00:04:21,329 - what? "Up"? 107 00:04:21,329 --> 00:04:22,730 Hey, that-- That's crazy. 108 00:04:22,763 --> 00:04:24,498 Let's just go back To the jade palace 109 00:04:24,532 --> 00:04:25,999 And forget about The whole thing. 110 00:04:26,033 --> 00:04:27,468 - but we're Almost there. 111 00:04:27,501 --> 00:04:28,736 I wanna see Where you grew up. 112 00:04:28,769 --> 00:04:31,472 - yeah, um, How 'bout you wait here... 113 00:04:31,505 --> 00:04:33,474 And, uh, Keep an eye out? 114 00:04:33,507 --> 00:04:35,075 And I'll go see What's happening. 115 00:04:35,108 --> 00:04:36,577 Come on, then I'll come back And get you. 116 00:04:36,610 --> 00:04:38,078 What do you say, buddy? 117 00:04:38,111 --> 00:04:41,682 - but we're already here. 118 00:04:41,715 --> 00:04:43,784 - uh... 119 00:04:43,817 --> 00:04:45,018 Po, listen. 120 00:04:45,052 --> 00:04:46,587 There's something I need to tell you. 121 00:04:46,620 --> 00:04:48,021 See, a couple years ago, 122 00:04:48,055 --> 00:04:50,824 Hao ming left me Crouching at the altar. 123 00:04:50,858 --> 00:04:52,360 - did she Forget something? 124 00:04:52,393 --> 00:04:55,363 - my heart. 125 00:04:55,363 --> 00:04:56,464 - no! 126 00:04:56,497 --> 00:04:58,399 Your teeny, Tiny little heart? 127 00:04:58,432 --> 00:04:59,467 - I was out of my mind. 128 00:04:59,500 --> 00:05:01,802 - teeny, tiny little mind? 129 00:05:01,835 --> 00:05:03,804 - I was mad And I wanted her to regret it, 130 00:05:03,837 --> 00:05:05,506 So I told a lie. 131 00:05:05,539 --> 00:05:06,640 - a teeny, tiny little-- 132 00:05:06,674 --> 00:05:07,841 - I get it! 133 00:05:07,875 --> 00:05:11,512 I'm small! 134 00:05:11,545 --> 00:05:13,547 - I don't like that some lady Broke your heart, 135 00:05:13,581 --> 00:05:15,449 Even if it is tiny. 136 00:05:15,483 --> 00:05:16,650 - thanks, po. 137 00:05:16,684 --> 00:05:18,386 You're a real friend. 138 00:05:18,419 --> 00:05:20,788 That's...Why I gotta Tell you something. 139 00:05:20,821 --> 00:05:22,523 - oh! It's The dragon warrior! 140 00:05:22,556 --> 00:05:23,391 - the dragon warrior Is here! 141 00:05:23,391 --> 00:05:25,393 [cheering] 142 00:05:25,393 --> 00:05:28,462 - aww, you told people I was coming? 143 00:05:30,698 --> 00:05:32,833 All: long live The dragon warrior! 144 00:05:32,866 --> 00:05:34,568 Long live The dragon warrior! 145 00:05:34,602 --> 00:05:36,770 - mantis? 146 00:05:40,574 --> 00:05:41,542 All: long live The dragon warrior! 147 00:05:41,575 --> 00:05:43,511 Long live The dragon warrior! 148 00:05:43,544 --> 00:05:44,678 - thank you, fans. 149 00:05:44,712 --> 00:05:45,679 It's great To be back home. 150 00:05:45,713 --> 00:05:48,716 - let us now celebrate His triumphant return 151 00:05:48,749 --> 00:05:50,551 With the jig Of happy! 152 00:05:50,584 --> 00:05:53,521 All: the jig Of happy! 153 00:05:53,554 --> 00:05:56,424 [cheerful music] 154 00:05:56,424 --> 00:06:02,430 * 155 00:06:02,463 --> 00:06:03,864 - so, buddy, anything You wanna fill me in on? 156 00:06:03,897 --> 00:06:06,066 Anything at all That maybe I should know about? 157 00:06:06,099 --> 00:06:08,001 This ringin' any bells? 158 00:06:08,035 --> 00:06:10,037 - okay, okay. 159 00:06:10,070 --> 00:06:11,739 I-I wanted to seem like A big shot 160 00:06:11,772 --> 00:06:14,442 So I could burn My ex-girlfriend for dumping me, 161 00:06:14,442 --> 00:06:15,943 So I told everyone... 162 00:06:15,976 --> 00:06:17,511 I was The dragon warrior. 163 00:06:17,545 --> 00:06:19,447 - what? 164 00:06:19,447 --> 00:06:20,514 - [gasps] 165 00:06:20,548 --> 00:06:23,116 There she is. 166 00:06:23,150 --> 00:06:26,053 - she definitely knows how To move her...Pointy dealies. 167 00:06:26,086 --> 00:06:28,489 - look, don't worry, All right? 168 00:06:28,522 --> 00:06:30,724 I'll tell everyone As soon as they're done. 169 00:06:30,758 --> 00:06:34,928 Even if she sees I'm a total fraud, a loser. 170 00:06:36,964 --> 00:06:41,469 - or...You could just keep on Being the dragon warrior. 171 00:06:41,502 --> 00:06:43,471 - what--but-- - it's okay. 172 00:06:43,504 --> 00:06:45,973 As your friend, I give you Permission to be me. 173 00:06:46,006 --> 00:06:48,509 And to rub Her tiny little nose in it. 174 00:06:48,542 --> 00:06:51,579 - oh, that would be really, Really great! 175 00:06:51,612 --> 00:06:55,883 Uh, but wait, if I'm the dragon Warrior, who are you? 176 00:06:55,916 --> 00:06:58,586 - I could be Your sidekick! 177 00:06:58,619 --> 00:06:59,620 - great! 178 00:06:59,653 --> 00:07:01,221 - there's just One problem. 179 00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:04,224 My awesomeness. 180 00:07:04,257 --> 00:07:07,561 Hmm, I have to find a way To hide my natural bodacity. 181 00:07:07,595 --> 00:07:09,096 I need a costume and props. 182 00:07:09,129 --> 00:07:11,965 Yeah, yeah, A whole sidekick persona. 183 00:07:11,999 --> 00:07:15,636 - mantis! Join us, dragon warrior. 184 00:07:17,771 --> 00:07:21,642 - please welcome The dragon warrior... 185 00:07:21,675 --> 00:07:23,644 And his sidekick. 186 00:07:23,677 --> 00:07:27,648 - oh, this eye patch is gonna Take some getting used to. 187 00:07:27,681 --> 00:07:29,817 Greetings, all. 188 00:07:29,850 --> 00:07:33,954 [garbled noises] 189 00:07:33,987 --> 00:07:36,524 Thought I'd add Some weird noises 190 00:07:36,524 --> 00:07:40,193 To the sidekick thing For a little flavor. 191 00:07:40,227 --> 00:07:43,130 - so nice to see you again, Dragon warrior. 192 00:07:43,163 --> 00:07:46,534 - oh, hello, Miss...? 193 00:07:46,567 --> 00:07:49,102 - hao. 194 00:07:49,136 --> 00:07:51,539 - hao. Yes. 195 00:07:51,539 --> 00:07:53,674 I think I got One of your urgent messages. 196 00:07:53,707 --> 00:07:55,576 I was in a pile Of urgent messages. 197 00:07:55,609 --> 00:07:57,678 - mm, it was An urgent message, 198 00:07:57,711 --> 00:08:01,815 But it was more about me Urgently missing you. 199 00:08:01,849 --> 00:08:03,551 - ooh. 200 00:08:03,584 --> 00:08:07,220 - there's an empty seat Next to mine, dragon warrior. 201 00:08:07,254 --> 00:08:10,223 - I suppose, as long As there's nothing blocking me 202 00:08:10,257 --> 00:08:13,927 If I have to be awesome. 203 00:08:16,163 --> 00:08:19,567 - so, po, being The dragon warrior's sidekick, 204 00:08:19,567 --> 00:08:23,904 You must be a bit of A kung fu master yourself, eh? 205 00:08:23,937 --> 00:08:26,607 - uh, me? No way. 206 00:08:26,640 --> 00:08:28,008 I'm hopeless With that stuff. 207 00:08:28,041 --> 00:08:31,579 I leave it up to the awesome Dragon warrior, yeah. 208 00:08:31,579 --> 00:08:33,681 I wouldn't know a "Nun" From a "Chuk." 209 00:08:33,714 --> 00:08:35,583 [chuckles nervously] 210 00:08:35,583 --> 00:08:40,320 Koo-koo-kree! 211 00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:45,593 - so, how did you come to be The dragon warrior's sidekick? 212 00:08:45,593 --> 00:08:49,930 - uh, uh, yeah. Uh, how did that happen? 213 00:08:49,963 --> 00:08:53,200 - uh, well, uh, The dragon warrior, 214 00:08:53,233 --> 00:08:56,737 Who is totally amazing, Saved my life. 215 00:08:56,770 --> 00:09:00,941 See, I used to be A dirt-poor farmer of... 216 00:09:00,974 --> 00:09:02,175 Dirt. 217 00:09:02,209 --> 00:09:04,612 And one day I was digging in, You know, dirt. 218 00:09:04,645 --> 00:09:07,748 And I woke a sleeping dirt-- No, I mean... 219 00:09:07,781 --> 00:09:10,684 Rock monster! 220 00:09:10,718 --> 00:09:12,185 Not knowing Any kung fu myself, 221 00:09:12,219 --> 00:09:15,956 I figured I was done for, When suddenly, out of nowhere, 222 00:09:15,989 --> 00:09:19,793 The awesomely bodacious Dragon warrior appeared! 223 00:09:19,827 --> 00:09:21,294 Awesomely. 224 00:09:21,328 --> 00:09:23,063 From the ground Where I lay helpless, 225 00:09:23,096 --> 00:09:25,065 I was able to view The most phenomenal display 226 00:09:25,098 --> 00:09:28,802 Of dragon warrior skills Ever seen by panda eyes. 227 00:09:28,836 --> 00:09:30,037 [explosion] 228 00:09:30,070 --> 00:09:31,138 It was so awesome, 229 00:09:31,171 --> 00:09:35,643 One of my eyes Actually closed forever. 230 00:09:35,643 --> 00:09:36,977 Legend has it 231 00:09:37,010 --> 00:09:38,979 That it never again wanted To look upon something 232 00:09:39,012 --> 00:09:44,051 That wasn't as awesome As the dragon warrior himself. 233 00:09:44,084 --> 00:09:45,719 I begged him to let me Be his sidekick, 234 00:09:45,753 --> 00:09:47,655 And even though I wasn't qualified, 235 00:09:47,688 --> 00:09:50,658 He let me Hang around. 236 00:09:50,691 --> 00:09:52,793 His life really turned around After you. 237 00:09:52,826 --> 00:09:55,929 He's got lady friends Out the wazoo now. 238 00:09:55,963 --> 00:09:57,831 Guess you missed The boat, lady. 239 00:09:57,865 --> 00:09:58,932 - it's true. 240 00:09:58,966 --> 00:10:01,101 I have always regretted Leaving you. 241 00:10:01,134 --> 00:10:02,402 You were the most-- 242 00:10:02,435 --> 00:10:03,236 - I love you, too! 243 00:10:03,270 --> 00:10:06,106 - ooh, burn, take that-- Wait, what? 244 00:10:06,139 --> 00:10:08,175 - I've never Forgotten you either. 245 00:10:08,208 --> 00:10:09,309 - yes, you did, You completely forgot her. 246 00:10:09,342 --> 00:10:10,778 Hao who? 247 00:10:10,811 --> 00:10:12,279 - no, I didn't-- 248 00:10:12,312 --> 00:10:13,747 - shh, you're blowing it. 249 00:10:13,781 --> 00:10:14,982 Stop saying Frou frou stuff, 250 00:10:15,015 --> 00:10:16,717 'cause she's totally Not regretting it. 251 00:10:16,750 --> 00:10:18,986 - yeah, frou frou. 252 00:10:19,019 --> 00:10:20,420 Hao... 253 00:10:20,453 --> 00:10:23,423 [ethereal music] 254 00:10:23,456 --> 00:10:24,491 * 255 00:10:24,524 --> 00:10:28,028 Will you have this humble hero As your boyfriend? 256 00:10:28,061 --> 00:10:30,363 - yes. 257 00:10:30,397 --> 00:10:31,732 - [groans] 258 00:10:31,765 --> 00:10:34,134 - liar! Fraud! 259 00:10:34,167 --> 00:10:36,704 You're no hero! 260 00:10:36,737 --> 00:10:38,005 - I can explain. 261 00:10:38,038 --> 00:10:40,207 - you say you're The dragon warrior, 262 00:10:40,240 --> 00:10:42,209 But really you're... 263 00:10:42,242 --> 00:10:44,211 - [garbled noises] 264 00:10:44,244 --> 00:10:45,846 - a girlfriend thief! 265 00:10:45,879 --> 00:10:46,780 - ooh? 266 00:10:46,814 --> 00:10:48,115 - you took my lady. 267 00:10:48,148 --> 00:10:49,883 And you will pay For it. 268 00:10:49,917 --> 00:10:52,119 - hao, who's this old guy? 269 00:10:52,152 --> 00:10:54,888 - uh, that's my ex-fiancé. 270 00:10:54,922 --> 00:10:56,056 - when did You break up? 271 00:10:56,089 --> 00:10:58,692 - 2 hours And 17 minutes ago. 272 00:10:58,726 --> 00:11:00,828 Because of you, Dragon warrior! 273 00:11:00,861 --> 00:11:04,732 - because I realized the truth Of me loving you. 274 00:11:04,765 --> 00:11:06,834 - because you're The dragon warrior! 275 00:11:06,867 --> 00:11:07,835 - not true. 276 00:11:07,868 --> 00:11:09,803 I love mantis For who he is! 277 00:11:09,837 --> 00:11:12,172 - oh! 278 00:11:12,205 --> 00:11:15,776 - you're going to be So sorry. 279 00:11:15,809 --> 00:11:16,910 [whistles] 280 00:11:16,944 --> 00:11:18,345 - who are you, Little guy? 281 00:11:18,378 --> 00:11:21,882 - I'm sai so, Dosu's sidekick. 282 00:11:21,915 --> 00:11:24,151 [whistles] 283 00:11:24,184 --> 00:11:27,220 - oh, wow, The whistling. 284 00:11:27,254 --> 00:11:28,889 Nice touch. 285 00:11:28,922 --> 00:11:31,058 I'm stuck With this big loud thing. 286 00:11:31,091 --> 00:11:32,793 Glarf! 287 00:11:32,826 --> 00:11:34,995 - we challenge you And your sidekick to a fight 288 00:11:35,028 --> 00:11:36,830 So we know Who the real hero is! 289 00:11:36,864 --> 00:11:40,433 Tomorrow, noon, The town square. 290 00:11:40,467 --> 00:11:42,002 Don't be late. 291 00:11:42,035 --> 00:11:43,336 - [gasps] 292 00:11:43,370 --> 00:11:46,840 - oh, we'll be there. 293 00:11:50,911 --> 00:11:52,913 - see ya, Suckers. 294 00:11:52,946 --> 00:11:55,115 [whistles] 295 00:11:55,148 --> 00:11:56,784 - they seem nice. 296 00:11:56,817 --> 00:12:00,487 [garbled noises] 297 00:12:04,091 --> 00:12:06,359 - [humming] 298 00:12:06,393 --> 00:12:07,895 [scatting] 299 00:12:07,928 --> 00:12:09,229 - mantis? 300 00:12:09,262 --> 00:12:11,932 - what an amazing nose You have, po. 301 00:12:11,965 --> 00:12:13,533 Beautiful. 302 00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:15,803 - uh... You okay? 303 00:12:17,137 --> 00:12:17,437 -[laughing]? 304 00:12:23,911 --> 00:12:25,145 Yes! 305 00:12:25,178 --> 00:12:27,414 I'm fantastic! 306 00:12:27,447 --> 00:12:29,817 The dragon warrior thing Worked. 307 00:12:29,850 --> 00:12:30,951 She likes me, po. 308 00:12:30,984 --> 00:12:33,486 She's crazy About me. 309 00:12:33,520 --> 00:12:37,324 And I'm-- I'm in love. 310 00:12:37,357 --> 00:12:39,159 - that wasn't supposed To happen. 311 00:12:39,192 --> 00:12:40,293 - I know! 312 00:12:40,327 --> 00:12:41,862 - [groans] 313 00:12:41,895 --> 00:12:43,563 Better save that kicking For the fight. 314 00:12:43,596 --> 00:12:46,299 - oh, right. 315 00:12:46,333 --> 00:12:48,335 The fight, I forgot all about that. 316 00:12:48,368 --> 00:12:50,470 Hao and I made plans To lie on the grass 317 00:12:50,503 --> 00:12:51,604 And look up at the clouds 318 00:12:51,638 --> 00:12:54,842 And say they look like bunnies And elephants and stuff. 319 00:12:54,842 --> 00:12:56,944 - I can't fight Those guys, mantis. 320 00:12:56,977 --> 00:13:00,113 If I start fighting them, They'll see I'm actually good. 321 00:13:00,147 --> 00:13:03,851 So good that they'll figure out That I'm the dragon warrior. 322 00:13:03,884 --> 00:13:05,585 And hao will know You are not. 323 00:13:05,618 --> 00:13:06,920 - [gasps] 324 00:13:06,954 --> 00:13:09,022 No! No! Oh! 325 00:13:09,056 --> 00:13:10,423 That can't happen, po! 326 00:13:10,457 --> 00:13:11,859 That can't happen! 327 00:13:11,892 --> 00:13:13,126 I'm in love! 328 00:13:13,160 --> 00:13:16,864 I'm in love! [crying] 329 00:13:16,864 --> 00:13:18,999 Po, you cannot Fight those guys. 330 00:13:19,032 --> 00:13:20,267 I'll be there. 331 00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:23,971 Uh, noon. 332 00:13:29,509 --> 00:13:32,612 - heh, I'm sure He'll be here. 333 00:13:32,645 --> 00:13:37,484 Probably got caught up Doing something...Awesome. 334 00:13:37,517 --> 00:13:40,120 [garbled noises] 335 00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:42,555 Yeah. I wish I could help, 336 00:13:42,589 --> 00:13:45,025 But it's not like beating up A helpless half-blind guy 337 00:13:45,058 --> 00:13:46,894 With a bum leg is really gonna Quench your-- 338 00:13:46,927 --> 00:13:48,028 - [screaming] 339 00:13:48,061 --> 00:13:48,896 - okay. 340 00:13:48,929 --> 00:13:51,464 [groaning] 341 00:13:51,498 --> 00:13:53,000 Ow, ow, ow, Watch the face. 342 00:13:53,033 --> 00:13:54,134 The butt is better. I don't eat with it. 343 00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:57,905 Ow! 344 00:14:02,242 --> 00:14:05,145 - tell the dragon warrior We'll be back here at 2:00. 345 00:14:05,178 --> 00:14:08,481 He better show up If he knows what's good for him. 346 00:14:08,515 --> 00:14:12,953 And you too. 347 00:14:12,986 --> 00:14:16,423 - [humming] 348 00:14:16,456 --> 00:14:17,590 Ooh, po! 349 00:14:17,624 --> 00:14:19,259 Oh, man, What happened? 350 00:14:19,292 --> 00:14:22,229 - there was a fight... At noon. 351 00:14:22,262 --> 00:14:24,164 - oh! Gah! 352 00:14:24,197 --> 00:14:25,198 I'm so sorry, po. 353 00:14:25,232 --> 00:14:27,334 I'm a little goofy On love! 354 00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:29,002 There was this one cloud And it-- 355 00:14:29,036 --> 00:14:30,670 It just had this sort of-- - mantis! 356 00:14:30,703 --> 00:14:33,040 - sorry. Well, are you okay? 357 00:14:33,073 --> 00:14:35,375 - [sighs] Nothing hurt but my pride. 358 00:14:35,408 --> 00:14:36,944 And a couple of ribs, 359 00:14:36,944 --> 00:14:38,545 And I've lost the feeling In two fingers, but... 360 00:14:38,578 --> 00:14:41,949 You can do me a solid by kicking Those guys' butts at 2:00. 361 00:14:41,982 --> 00:14:44,384 - and that's just What I'm gonna do. 362 00:14:44,417 --> 00:14:46,353 Right after hao takes me To meet her parents. 363 00:14:46,386 --> 00:14:47,387 - what? 364 00:14:47,420 --> 00:14:48,956 - I know! Isn't it great? 365 00:14:48,989 --> 00:14:51,024 Do you know how many girls Have taken me 366 00:14:51,058 --> 00:14:52,592 To meet their parents? 367 00:14:52,625 --> 00:14:53,693 - none? 368 00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:54,962 - less! 369 00:14:54,962 --> 00:14:57,030 I am really Making progress. 370 00:14:57,064 --> 00:14:59,199 And I owe it all To you. 371 00:14:59,232 --> 00:15:00,400 - [groans] 372 00:15:00,433 --> 00:15:02,269 I'm happy for you, mantis. 373 00:15:02,302 --> 00:15:05,072 But I'm serious, man, You need to be there at 2:00. 374 00:15:05,105 --> 00:15:07,107 - you can count On me, pal. 375 00:15:07,140 --> 00:15:10,110 But don't fight them. 376 00:15:10,143 --> 00:15:13,613 - [whistles] 377 00:15:15,182 --> 00:15:18,651 - uh... Pretty sure he's just A couple of blocks away. 378 00:15:18,685 --> 00:15:20,988 'cause the dragon warrior's Work is never-- 379 00:15:20,988 --> 00:15:22,289 [gong rings] 380 00:15:22,322 --> 00:15:24,992 - [screams] 381 00:15:24,992 --> 00:15:28,728 - [groans] 382 00:15:28,761 --> 00:15:30,063 - I can do 6:00. 383 00:15:30,097 --> 00:15:33,000 - [grunting] 384 00:15:35,602 --> 00:15:39,139 [gong rings] Uh-oh. 385 00:15:44,077 --> 00:15:45,312 [spits] 386 00:15:45,345 --> 00:15:46,413 - po! 387 00:15:46,446 --> 00:15:48,681 Oh, is it 6:00 already? 388 00:15:48,715 --> 00:15:51,484 - it's 9:00. 389 00:15:51,518 --> 00:15:53,753 - oh, hey, you actually look Like you need that crutch now. 390 00:15:53,786 --> 00:15:56,589 - I do need this crutch now. 391 00:15:56,623 --> 00:15:59,492 And listen to this. 392 00:15:59,526 --> 00:16:01,628 [bones cracking] 393 00:16:01,661 --> 00:16:04,364 Bones aren't supposed To sound like that, mantis. 394 00:16:04,397 --> 00:16:05,465 - uh, I'm sorry. 395 00:16:05,498 --> 00:16:06,533 Look, next time-- 396 00:16:06,566 --> 00:16:08,101 - there's not gonna be A next time. 397 00:16:08,135 --> 00:16:11,171 You're a disgrace To the dragon warrior name. 398 00:16:11,204 --> 00:16:13,140 - po! - don't "Po" me, mantis. 399 00:16:13,173 --> 00:16:14,641 The dragon warrior's supposed To be there 400 00:16:14,674 --> 00:16:19,512 For those who need him, Not just think about himself. 401 00:16:19,546 --> 00:16:22,215 As soon as my sight comes back, I'm leaving. 402 00:16:22,249 --> 00:16:23,783 - what? What? No! 403 00:16:23,816 --> 00:16:25,552 No, p-please, Not now. 404 00:16:25,585 --> 00:16:26,486 - because? 405 00:16:26,519 --> 00:16:28,788 - because hao and I Are getting married. 406 00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:31,658 - [chokes] Wha--? 407 00:16:35,228 --> 00:16:36,063 - isn't it great? 408 00:16:36,096 --> 00:16:38,565 I'm gonna marry The girl of my dreams! 409 00:16:38,598 --> 00:16:40,467 - marriage? That means-- 410 00:16:40,500 --> 00:16:43,203 - together forever! 411 00:16:43,236 --> 00:16:44,471 - mantis, are you Out of your mind? 412 00:16:44,504 --> 00:16:46,173 You were just gonna make her A little jealous 413 00:16:46,206 --> 00:16:47,540 And then skedaddle. 414 00:16:47,574 --> 00:16:49,342 They need us in the valley Of peace. 415 00:16:49,376 --> 00:16:51,111 I'm the-- - shh! 416 00:16:51,144 --> 00:16:52,812 - [whispers] Dragon warrior. 417 00:16:52,845 --> 00:16:54,547 This is all a lie. 418 00:16:54,581 --> 00:16:56,683 - and a great idea. Thanks. 419 00:16:56,716 --> 00:16:59,552 I'll tell her The truth eventually. 420 00:16:59,586 --> 00:17:01,388 Shouldn't be more than A few years. 421 00:17:01,421 --> 00:17:05,092 - mantis, you are not The dragon warrior. 422 00:17:05,125 --> 00:17:07,260 - [laughs nervously] 423 00:17:07,294 --> 00:17:09,096 Oh, you and your labels. 424 00:17:09,096 --> 00:17:11,331 This is bigger than that. 425 00:17:11,364 --> 00:17:14,401 Love, po! Love! 426 00:17:14,434 --> 00:17:16,769 It's all around us, baby. 427 00:17:16,803 --> 00:17:20,107 All the kings and queens With all the riches in the world 428 00:17:20,107 --> 00:17:21,708 Are nothing without love. 429 00:17:21,741 --> 00:17:23,176 And I've got it! 430 00:17:23,210 --> 00:17:27,180 Po, I've got it right here In my little claw. 431 00:17:27,214 --> 00:17:29,749 How can you not Be there for me 432 00:17:29,782 --> 00:17:32,119 When I need you The most? 433 00:17:32,152 --> 00:17:33,453 - all I've been Is there for you. 434 00:17:33,486 --> 00:17:35,388 But when I needed you To be there for me, 435 00:17:35,422 --> 00:17:37,524 You were just There for you! 436 00:17:37,557 --> 00:17:38,791 And hao. 437 00:17:38,825 --> 00:17:41,394 And I don't mean "And how," I mean "And hao," 438 00:17:41,428 --> 00:17:43,363 Like your girlfriend hao. 439 00:17:43,396 --> 00:17:45,265 - I got it. But po-- 440 00:17:45,298 --> 00:17:46,699 - no more, mantis. 441 00:17:46,733 --> 00:17:48,535 I'm going home. 442 00:17:48,568 --> 00:17:52,739 - no, po, Don't go. 443 00:17:52,772 --> 00:17:54,474 [sighs] 444 00:17:54,507 --> 00:17:56,443 - try to help a guy out, 445 00:17:56,476 --> 00:17:58,145 And what does it Get ya? 446 00:17:58,178 --> 00:18:01,281 Butt-kickings and a big mouthful Of disappointment... 447 00:18:01,314 --> 00:18:02,649 And less teeth. 448 00:18:02,682 --> 00:18:05,318 And--and Nothingness. 449 00:18:05,352 --> 00:18:07,820 Let's see that red mantis dude And his whistling buddy 450 00:18:07,854 --> 00:18:10,223 Take me on When I'm really trying. 451 00:18:10,257 --> 00:18:12,625 Wah! Hah! 452 00:18:12,659 --> 00:18:16,329 Wa-cha! Hiya! 453 00:18:22,769 --> 00:18:26,173 Say hello To the dragon warrior. 454 00:18:26,206 --> 00:18:29,209 - wait-- How? 455 00:18:29,242 --> 00:18:31,811 Uh...You're The dragon warrior. 456 00:18:31,844 --> 00:18:33,280 Not mantis. 457 00:18:33,313 --> 00:18:34,681 - huh? Me? 458 00:18:34,714 --> 00:18:36,916 Ah, no. [raspberries] 459 00:18:36,949 --> 00:18:41,521 Ha, I'm too lame And husky to be him. 460 00:18:41,554 --> 00:18:45,225 - then how could you possibly Do such amazing kung fu? 461 00:18:45,258 --> 00:18:46,793 - night classes? 462 00:18:46,826 --> 00:18:48,328 - we have To tell hao. 463 00:18:48,361 --> 00:18:50,197 She's marrying a fraud! 464 00:18:50,230 --> 00:18:51,097 [whistles] 465 00:18:51,198 --> 00:18:54,267 - sai so, let's tear That mantis apart. 466 00:18:54,301 --> 00:18:56,436 - no, no, no! You're making a mistake. 467 00:18:56,469 --> 00:19:00,240 Horg! 468 00:19:07,214 --> 00:19:09,616 - it is a most thrilling And solemn occasion 469 00:19:09,649 --> 00:19:12,485 When a man and a woman Decide to unite forever. 470 00:19:12,519 --> 00:19:13,686 - hao ming! 471 00:19:13,720 --> 00:19:16,389 I have some interesting news for You about your dragon wa-- 472 00:19:16,423 --> 00:19:19,559 - oh, my gosh, so sorry, How embarrassing. 473 00:19:19,592 --> 00:19:22,362 Sorry to be late, Oh, mighty dragon warrior. 474 00:19:22,395 --> 00:19:25,265 Keep going! 475 00:19:25,298 --> 00:19:26,566 [fighting in background] 476 00:19:26,599 --> 00:19:27,800 - right. 477 00:19:27,834 --> 00:19:31,704 Before we begin, does anyone Have a jig of objection they-- 478 00:19:31,738 --> 00:19:34,841 - skip that part! 479 00:19:34,874 --> 00:19:37,244 - um, the reading Of poetry-- 480 00:19:37,244 --> 00:19:38,378 - skip it! 481 00:19:38,411 --> 00:19:41,748 - that guy is Not the dragon war-- 482 00:19:41,781 --> 00:19:46,253 - dragon warrior, You may now say your vows. 483 00:19:46,286 --> 00:19:48,688 - uh, I wrote these myself. 484 00:19:48,721 --> 00:19:50,257 [clears throat] 485 00:19:50,290 --> 00:19:53,260 Remember when I was four And you were three? 486 00:19:53,293 --> 00:19:55,662 - fraud! 487 00:19:55,695 --> 00:19:57,430 - speed it up, mantis. 488 00:19:57,464 --> 00:19:58,431 - remember when I was 16 And you were 15? 489 00:19:58,465 --> 00:20:00,267 - faster! 490 00:20:00,300 --> 00:20:01,601 - promise to love, honor, And respect-- 491 00:20:01,634 --> 00:20:03,670 - hao, that guy Is lying-- 492 00:20:03,703 --> 00:20:05,372 - weddings always Make me cry. 493 00:20:05,405 --> 00:20:06,939 Let's just hold each other For a minute. 494 00:20:06,973 --> 00:20:08,441 - [gasping] Lying. 495 00:20:08,475 --> 00:20:11,511 - a-ha! 496 00:20:11,544 --> 00:20:14,314 - hao, would you like To say your vows? 497 00:20:14,347 --> 00:20:16,416 - my dearest dragon warrior, 498 00:20:16,449 --> 00:20:18,918 Since the day I first heard There was a dragon warrior, 499 00:20:18,951 --> 00:20:21,288 I knew I wanted to be 500 00:20:21,321 --> 00:20:22,755 Mrs. Dragon warrior. 501 00:20:22,789 --> 00:20:24,891 [echoing] Dragon warrior, dragon warrior. 502 00:20:24,924 --> 00:20:28,261 [in slow-motion] Dragon warrior. 503 00:20:30,630 --> 00:20:33,433 - no. 504 00:20:33,466 --> 00:20:36,736 And... Hiya! 505 00:20:36,769 --> 00:20:40,440 - [whistles] 506 00:20:40,473 --> 00:20:43,443 - get off my friend! 507 00:20:43,476 --> 00:20:46,446 [dramatic music] 508 00:20:46,479 --> 00:20:53,453 * 509 00:20:53,486 --> 00:20:57,357 [grunting] 510 00:21:23,850 --> 00:21:26,519 - mantis is not The dragon warrior. 511 00:21:26,553 --> 00:21:30,423 - if he's not The dragon warrior, then who is? 512 00:21:30,457 --> 00:21:32,825 - this guy. 513 00:21:32,859 --> 00:21:34,861 [crowd gasping] 514 00:21:34,894 --> 00:21:36,095 - um. 515 00:21:36,128 --> 00:21:37,830 - what, me? [raspberries] 516 00:21:37,864 --> 00:21:40,367 The dragon warrior? Ridiculous! 517 00:21:40,400 --> 00:21:43,403 I can't even walk. 518 00:21:43,436 --> 00:21:44,604 See? 519 00:21:44,637 --> 00:21:45,605 - stop! 520 00:21:45,638 --> 00:21:46,973 I can't watch you Do this, po. 521 00:21:47,006 --> 00:21:48,875 It's painful. 522 00:21:48,908 --> 00:21:52,412 Everyone, I am not The dragon warrior! 523 00:21:52,445 --> 00:21:53,380 - what? 524 00:21:53,413 --> 00:21:55,782 The wedding is off. 525 00:21:55,815 --> 00:21:58,485 - not only am I not The dragon warrior, 526 00:21:58,518 --> 00:22:00,520 I'm not worthy To be him. 527 00:22:00,553 --> 00:22:03,556 That guy is worthy. 528 00:22:03,590 --> 00:22:04,957 He's my best friend. 529 00:22:04,991 --> 00:22:06,826 And he doesn't care If I'm the dragon warrior. 530 00:22:06,859 --> 00:22:09,496 He took several beatings And humiliated himself 531 00:22:09,529 --> 00:22:10,997 Even more than usual... 532 00:22:11,030 --> 00:22:12,532 Just so I could marry A woman 533 00:22:12,565 --> 00:22:14,033 Who doesn't even Deserve me. 534 00:22:14,066 --> 00:22:16,002 - [stammering] 535 00:22:16,035 --> 00:22:17,036 I don't deserve you? 536 00:22:17,069 --> 00:22:19,472 [scoffs] You don't deserve me. 537 00:22:19,506 --> 00:22:21,641 - goodbye, hao. 538 00:22:21,674 --> 00:22:25,478 - well, dosu, looks like Your lady's back on the market. 539 00:22:25,512 --> 00:22:27,447 Good luck. 540 00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:30,950 - thank you, Dragon warrior. 541 00:22:32,952 --> 00:22:34,854 - [groaning] 542 00:22:34,887 --> 00:22:37,590 - po, po, you can't Walk like that. 543 00:22:37,624 --> 00:22:39,592 [sighs] Get on my shoulders. 544 00:22:39,626 --> 00:22:42,028 - it's okay. 545 00:22:42,061 --> 00:22:44,564 - I'll carry you. 546 00:22:44,597 --> 00:22:48,134 I'll be fine. 547 00:22:50,136 --> 00:22:54,974 [grunting] 36033

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