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1
00:00:00,001 --> 00:00:03,073
(restaurant patrons talking and laughing)
2
00:00:03,128 --> 00:00:04,604
- Oh, nude beach.
- Ball pit.
3
00:00:04,638 --> 00:00:05,990
- Strip club.
- Paddle boats.
4
00:00:06,025 --> 00:00:08,095
- LINDSAY: Dildo party.
- EDGAR: Turtle races.
5
00:00:08,130 --> 00:00:10,526
- LINDSAY: Sex trampoline.
- EDGAR: Ah, yes.
6
00:00:10,561 --> 00:00:12,143
Can we do that at the nude beach?
7
00:00:12,178 --> 00:00:14,047
- That could be like third.
- What are we doing?
8
00:00:14,080 --> 00:00:15,316
Making a list, ho.
9
00:00:15,351 --> 00:00:16,762
Look around, guys.
10
00:00:16,832 --> 00:00:18,761
Sunday Funday is so played out.
11
00:00:18,796 --> 00:00:22,817
Oh, no. They've corporatized
your cloying, fabricated,
12
00:00:22,852 --> 00:00:25,356
feckless drinking holiday.
13
00:00:25,412 --> 00:00:27,413
'Tis nothing pure anymore?
14
00:00:27,448 --> 00:00:29,259
But this is our special thing.
15
00:00:29,294 --> 00:00:30,907
It's the last thing that's distracting us
16
00:00:30,942 --> 00:00:33,001
- from the constant dangers...
- (glass breaking)
17
00:00:33,036 --> 00:00:34,767
EDGAR: Jesus!
18
00:00:34,800 --> 00:00:37,250
- (exhales)
- We have to do Sunday Funday.
19
00:00:37,308 --> 00:00:39,549
- It's my one day off from Paul.
- GRETCHEN: No!
20
00:00:39,604 --> 00:00:41,515
No. You have two choices.
21
00:00:41,562 --> 00:00:43,594
You can either be with Paul for realsies,
22
00:00:43,649 --> 00:00:44,942
or you can dump him.
23
00:00:44,977 --> 00:00:47,545
I am sick of listening to
you complain about stuff,
24
00:00:47,602 --> 00:00:49,314
- and not do shit about it.
- Fine.
25
00:00:49,349 --> 00:00:51,324
I won't bring it up anymore, bitch.
26
00:00:51,386 --> 00:00:52,379
Bad friend bitch.
27
00:00:52,414 --> 00:00:54,702
Hey, you can't take
Sunday Funday away from us.
28
00:00:54,737 --> 00:00:56,362
I love it, too, but, clearly,
29
00:00:56,410 --> 00:00:59,167
it cannot continue in its current form.
30
00:01:00,588 --> 00:01:06,149
But... maybe with a little creativity...
31
00:01:06,184 --> 00:01:07,753
(groans)
32
00:01:08,700 --> 00:01:10,337
Well...
33
00:01:10,640 --> 00:01:12,605
legend has it,
34
00:01:12,694 --> 00:01:15,689
there is a bar, a secret
bar, so exclusive...
35
00:01:15,724 --> 00:01:19,656
No. We're not doing your stupid
scavenger hunt for some dumb bar.
36
00:01:19,711 --> 00:01:21,307
You pitch it every Sunday.
37
00:01:21,341 --> 00:01:23,262
It is not just a bar.
38
00:01:23,311 --> 00:01:26,347
It is a secret bar with a hidden entrance.
39
00:01:26,393 --> 00:01:28,725
A magical land full of beautiful people,
40
00:01:28,783 --> 00:01:33,239
and strong beverages, and
retro decor, called a speakeasy.
41
00:01:33,302 --> 00:01:34,245
Bye-bye.
42
00:01:34,385 --> 00:01:36,803
Goddammit guys, I need this.
43
00:01:36,866 --> 00:01:38,331
I had depression.
44
00:01:38,364 --> 00:01:42,168
That is a legit-ass,
mental-ass illness.
45
00:01:42,202 --> 00:01:44,531
I can't be a pilot. It's a fact.
46
00:01:44,647 --> 00:01:46,050
Also, Jimmy's dad died.
47
00:01:46,108 --> 00:01:47,349
Yeah. About which, I didn't care.
48
00:01:47,404 --> 00:01:51,548
And I think we both deserve to
have a little fun after all that.
49
00:01:52,344 --> 00:01:54,539
Also, there's a bar in
L.A. I can't get into.
50
00:01:54,626 --> 00:01:55,766
That is unacceptable.
51
00:01:55,801 --> 00:01:57,551
Well, accept it,
52
00:01:57,630 --> 00:02:02,137
'cause I'm not going on a
scavenger hunt to find a speakeasy.
53
00:02:02,183 --> 00:02:04,410
Easily the worst development in bar culture
54
00:02:04,471 --> 00:02:08,709
since Internet jukeboxes and big ice cubes.
55
00:02:09,191 --> 00:02:10,899
- (whining)
- Oh.
56
00:02:11,683 --> 00:02:13,757
(whimpering)
57
00:02:19,324 --> 00:02:20,953
Goddammit. Fine.
58
00:02:20,988 --> 00:02:24,211
I will come along, but I'm
not solving any riddles.
59
00:02:24,243 --> 00:02:25,545
Fine.
60
00:02:25,662 --> 00:02:28,539
If it keeps me out of the house... I'm in.
61
00:02:28,574 --> 00:02:30,507
Oh, can we call it Sunday Funday, anyway?
62
00:02:30,583 --> 00:02:33,093
Absolutely. Yay!
63
00:02:33,163 --> 00:02:35,464
I have the first clue
bookmarked on my phone.
64
00:02:35,499 --> 00:02:38,058
The site is blank except
for this dumb symbol.
65
00:02:38,105 --> 00:02:40,075
You can't click on anything.
66
00:02:41,447 --> 00:02:42,355
_
67
00:02:44,215 --> 00:02:45,732
JIMMY: Hmm.
68
00:02:45,840 --> 00:02:47,868
Source code.
69
00:02:48,009 --> 00:02:50,575
There. See those numbers?
70
00:02:50,661 --> 00:02:52,884
They're outside any command fields.
71
00:02:52,977 --> 00:02:54,561
It's a message.
72
00:02:54,596 --> 00:02:55,839
It's an address.
73
00:02:55,901 --> 00:02:56,710
We won!
74
00:02:56,743 --> 00:02:58,119
Ugh, nevermind.
75
00:02:58,197 --> 00:03:00,905
- Too short for coordinates.
- Maybe it's date and time.
76
00:03:00,968 --> 00:03:02,049
Dewey.
77
00:03:02,082 --> 00:03:03,212
Do we what?
78
00:03:03,267 --> 00:03:04,057
Dewey Decimal.
79
00:03:04,092 --> 00:03:07,669
Do... we... decimal?
80
00:03:08,299 --> 00:03:10,169
Yeah. When I'm writing money.
81
00:03:10,204 --> 00:03:11,636
Or when I get to the end of the thing,
82
00:03:11,702 --> 00:03:13,634
and you go "boop" with your pen.
83
00:03:14,745 --> 00:03:16,652
- Boop.
- JIMMY: Jesus Christ.
84
00:03:16,687 --> 00:03:20,624
The numbers refer to
the Dewey Decimal system.
85
00:03:24,514 --> 00:03:27,574
So we should go to the library.
86
00:03:28,671 --> 00:03:31,744
ALL: Oh.
87
00:03:31,904 --> 00:03:34,560
GRETCHEN/LINDSAY:
Sunday Funday
88
00:03:34,622 --> 00:03:36,417
Better than a Monday
89
00:03:36,450 --> 00:03:38,212
Can only do it one way
90
00:03:38,255 --> 00:03:39,877
And that is the drunk way
91
00:03:39,939 --> 00:03:41,474
Sunday Funday
92
00:03:41,544 --> 00:03:43,589
-
Better than a Monday
- Puzzles! Mysteries!
93
00:03:43,623 --> 00:03:44,889
Can only do it one way.
94
00:03:44,944 --> 00:03:46,130
I got it.
95
00:03:47,543 --> 00:03:49,547
96
00:03:52,515 --> 00:03:55,544
I'm gonna leave you anyway
97
00:03:55,618 --> 00:03:57,921
I'm gonna leave you anyway
98
00:03:57,993 --> 00:04:00,239
Gonna leave you anyway.
99
00:04:00,274 --> 00:04:05,266
Sync and corrections by explosiveskull
www.addic7ed.com
100
00:04:09,086 --> 00:04:10,594
(sighs)
101
00:04:12,485 --> 00:04:15,122
Ew, books are gross.
102
00:04:19,671 --> 00:04:21,748
Here Lindser, I got you a book.
103
00:04:21,783 --> 00:04:23,251
Har-har. (gasps)
104
00:04:23,283 --> 00:04:24,669
Here's a book for you.
105
00:04:24,704 --> 00:04:28,683
It's called "How Not to be a Bitch
for No Reason on Sunday Funday".
106
00:04:28,718 --> 00:04:30,004
Oh, look. Here's one.
107
00:04:30,042 --> 00:04:32,080
It's called "I'm Living a Double Life,
108
00:04:32,146 --> 00:04:34,369
"and I Can't Be Myself Around My Husband:
109
00:04:34,415 --> 00:04:37,239
The Lindsay Jillian Story", volume two.
110
00:04:37,284 --> 00:04:38,576
Where's volume one?
111
00:04:38,629 --> 00:04:41,229
There is no volume one.
You're just that stupid.
112
00:04:44,463 --> 00:04:46,039
EDGAR: She he be doing that here?
113
00:04:46,141 --> 00:04:47,362
That's weird. Isn't that weird?
114
00:04:47,415 --> 00:04:48,899
I look at porn all the time.
115
00:04:48,934 --> 00:04:50,742
The bank, the nail salon.
116
00:04:50,792 --> 00:04:54,397
That dog store on Fairfax that
won't let me foster puppies anymore.
117
00:04:54,442 --> 00:04:55,500
Here we go.
118
00:04:55,539 --> 00:04:57,250
(moaning)
119
00:04:57,285 --> 00:04:58,621
(scoffs)
120
00:05:04,626 --> 00:05:05,828
(gasps)
121
00:05:07,607 --> 00:05:08,429
Look.
122
00:05:08,463 --> 00:05:10,708
"Speakeasies of Los Angeles."
123
00:05:10,776 --> 00:05:13,008
This must be it, right?
124
00:05:13,079 --> 00:05:14,770
It has most of the numbers.
125
00:05:14,802 --> 00:05:18,641
But then what are the extra
numbers in the secret code for?
126
00:05:20,891 --> 00:05:22,956
It's a page number.
127
00:05:23,042 --> 00:05:24,317
Obviously.
128
00:05:24,395 --> 00:05:25,461
Oh, my God.
129
00:05:25,527 --> 00:05:27,817
Duh. You're so smart.
130
00:05:28,696 --> 00:05:29,944
(gasps) There's a photo.
131
00:05:29,998 --> 00:05:32,871
This whole thing's just so mannered.
132
00:05:32,937 --> 00:05:35,288
A library, rare books.
133
00:05:35,323 --> 00:05:38,511
- So twee and completely...
- The piano.
134
00:05:38,581 --> 00:05:40,224
Could it be something
about the sheet music?
135
00:05:40,279 --> 00:05:42,571
- Ah! That's ingenious.
- It's a ragtime.
136
00:05:42,618 --> 00:05:44,808
You can tell from the
stride in the left hand.
137
00:05:45,999 --> 00:05:47,121
What?
138
00:05:47,201 --> 00:05:48,893
I took piano lessons.
139
00:05:48,956 --> 00:05:51,147
Mom used to challenge me
to see how loud I could play
140
00:05:51,246 --> 00:05:54,269
while her and her scene
partner ran lines in her room.
141
00:05:56,450 --> 00:05:58,480
Do we know anyone who knows ragtime?
142
00:05:58,513 --> 00:06:00,249
(sighs)
143
00:06:03,856 --> 00:06:07,275
God damn! These pixels look big as shit!
144
00:06:07,310 --> 00:06:09,262
So I just got a fun piece of news.
145
00:06:09,319 --> 00:06:10,954
Shitstain and Jaclyn eloped.
146
00:06:11,041 --> 00:06:13,165
- (gasps)
- Oh, my God! Sweetie!
147
00:06:13,200 --> 00:06:16,241
- That's amazing. Congratulations.
- Thank you.
148
00:06:16,276 --> 00:06:18,539
Yeah. We were in Vegas
checking out Gilles Goujon's
149
00:06:18,600 --> 00:06:20,706
new schnitzel restaurant
in the Wynn, and figured,
150
00:06:20,776 --> 00:06:22,837
why not start the rest of our life today?
151
00:06:22,871 --> 00:06:25,500
Yeah. Isn't that a fun surprise?
152
00:06:25,535 --> 00:06:27,744
It puts shit into perspective,
like how you can live
153
00:06:27,821 --> 00:06:31,310
your whole life alone
and... it's-it's fine.
154
00:06:31,345 --> 00:06:33,806
I mean, I'm... (chuckles) I'm-I'm fine.
155
00:06:33,841 --> 00:06:36,371
SAM: Now, let's see, it
looks like it could be
156
00:06:36,433 --> 00:06:38,552
the "Hot For Florida Rag."
157
00:06:39,294 --> 00:06:40,974
But...
158
00:06:41,503 --> 00:06:45,093
that repeating figure could be...
159
00:06:46,294 --> 00:06:47,594
Oh, tricky.
160
00:06:47,688 --> 00:06:49,332
Hold my bigifier.
161
00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:55,537
(playing ragtime melody)
162
00:06:55,740 --> 00:06:56,909
Mm-hmm.
163
00:06:57,939 --> 00:06:59,574
It's called "Happy Toes,"
164
00:06:59,657 --> 00:07:01,772
and it was written during World War I
165
00:07:01,807 --> 00:07:05,376
by Cornelius "Eight Fingers" Gimble.
166
00:07:05,451 --> 00:07:06,827
"Happy Toes"? That's the clue?
167
00:07:06,879 --> 00:07:08,132
EDGAR: Oh, I don't... I
don't know. I'm not sure
168
00:07:08,198 --> 00:07:10,048
how weed will affect me these days.
169
00:07:10,117 --> 00:07:12,861
Actually, studies have shown
that marijuana can curtail
170
00:07:12,902 --> 00:07:15,404
being completely lame.
171
00:07:16,870 --> 00:07:19,377
JIMMY: Ha! You gave in to
peer pressure. (chuckles)
172
00:07:19,412 --> 00:07:21,833
- This is really smooth.
- Keep it.
173
00:07:21,868 --> 00:07:23,232
Do you want to join the
scavenger hunt with us?
174
00:07:23,267 --> 00:07:25,334
- (music stops)
- Hell no! I am frightened
175
00:07:25,369 --> 00:07:27,782
by puzzles and general trickery.
176
00:07:27,817 --> 00:07:30,280
The dope thing about this
song is, midway through...
177
00:07:30,327 --> 00:07:32,472
blam... switches into a minor key.
178
00:07:32,550 --> 00:07:36,039
So it's like "Happy Toes,"
but then it's like "Sad Toes."
179
00:07:36,074 --> 00:07:38,613
- (playing in minor key)
- Happy toes,
180
00:07:38,710 --> 00:07:40,464
sad toes...
181
00:07:42,516 --> 00:07:43,819
182
00:07:43,914 --> 00:07:46,710
_
183
00:07:52,994 --> 00:07:54,261
(inhales)
184
00:07:54,373 --> 00:07:55,683
So, what's the clue here?
185
00:07:55,740 --> 00:07:57,715
Hand job massage parlors?
186
00:07:57,750 --> 00:07:59,213
Pupusa ladies?
187
00:07:59,248 --> 00:08:02,467
Girls wearing jeans
that give them long butt?
188
00:08:03,007 --> 00:08:04,360
Poors?
189
00:08:04,409 --> 00:08:05,673
Look!
190
00:08:07,374 --> 00:08:08,810
(gasps)
191
00:08:10,336 --> 00:08:12,614
- Ooh. Ooh.
- (soft grunting)
192
00:08:12,646 --> 00:08:14,849
(Lindsay groaning)
193
00:08:15,108 --> 00:08:17,346
Give us your secrets!
194
00:08:17,381 --> 00:08:19,818
I guess he's not for us. Oops.
195
00:08:19,892 --> 00:08:21,578
Paul would be so good at this.
196
00:08:21,660 --> 00:08:22,723
You've said his name twice.
197
00:08:22,777 --> 00:08:24,545
Once more, you summon him like Beetlejuice.
198
00:08:24,611 --> 00:08:27,004
If you want to say
something, say it to my face.
199
00:08:27,066 --> 00:08:29,219
Fine. A: You're boring.
200
00:08:29,274 --> 00:08:31,305
B: I know it's you who's
been wiping boogers into
201
00:08:31,379 --> 00:08:33,675
my glove box, and C: you're a liar.
202
00:08:33,710 --> 00:08:35,499
You told me to wear my
stains on the outside!
203
00:08:35,562 --> 00:08:37,185
You can't even let Paul
know you have stains.
204
00:08:37,220 --> 00:08:39,364
You and me... we're in a fight now!
205
00:08:39,411 --> 00:08:41,510
- Good!
- (phone ringing)
206
00:08:42,510 --> 00:08:45,066
(gasps) Ow!
207
00:08:45,226 --> 00:08:46,649
Ow!
208
00:08:49,445 --> 00:08:50,845
WOMAN (over phone): Sigh for me now.
209
00:08:50,880 --> 00:08:52,354
- Oh, my God!
- Holy shit!
210
00:08:52,425 --> 00:08:53,402
Sigh for me now.
211
00:08:53,460 --> 00:08:55,193
She wants us to sigh for her?
212
00:08:55,228 --> 00:08:56,893
- Sigh for me now.
- How do you sigh again?
213
00:08:57,058 --> 00:08:58,029
(both sighing)
214
00:08:58,064 --> 00:08:59,814
Sigh for me now.
215
00:09:00,060 --> 00:09:02,214
- (all three sighing)
- JIMMY: "Sigh for me."
216
00:09:02,268 --> 00:09:03,447
- Cypher. Cypher.
- (sighing)
217
00:09:03,487 --> 00:09:05,490
It's a cypher. It's a code!
218
00:09:05,609 --> 00:09:07,946
Cypher the words "me now" on the keypad.
219
00:09:08,005 --> 00:09:10,748
Six, three, six, six, nine.
220
00:09:10,783 --> 00:09:12,586
- Six, nine.
- (laughs) - Nice.
221
00:09:15,004 --> 00:09:16,177
Nothing's happening.
222
00:09:16,209 --> 00:09:18,179
(loud clink in phone)
223
00:09:18,289 --> 00:09:20,648
Oh, my God! I mean, yes.
224
00:09:20,683 --> 00:09:22,385
It's cool, that.
225
00:09:22,617 --> 00:09:25,006
- (gasps) It's a key!
- Baby key.
226
00:09:25,061 --> 00:09:27,136
How are we supposed to know what it's for?
227
00:09:27,171 --> 00:09:28,432
Where you going?
228
00:09:30,820 --> 00:09:34,198
LINDSAY: Oh, no. We scared that man
so much, he dropped his typewriter.
229
00:09:34,272 --> 00:09:36,187
He was for us. I knew it!
230
00:09:36,222 --> 00:09:38,312
And what was the plan
if we hadn't scared him?
231
00:09:38,399 --> 00:09:40,235
Hand it to us? Stupid.
232
00:09:40,267 --> 00:09:42,581
It's okay to admit that
you like this, Jimmy.
233
00:09:42,628 --> 00:09:44,723
I just want to find this
bar so that I can tell
234
00:09:44,765 --> 00:09:46,707
whoever made this amateur game
235
00:09:46,774 --> 00:09:49,210
what a minor league effort it is.
236
00:09:49,242 --> 00:09:50,603
- (both gasping)
- What the...?
237
00:09:50,651 --> 00:09:51,803
GRETCHEN: Oh, my God!
238
00:09:51,838 --> 00:09:53,878
- That's insane!
- Okay.
239
00:09:53,920 --> 00:09:55,136
That's quite clever.
240
00:09:55,171 --> 00:09:57,826
The masturbating homeless
man's computer took the photo.
241
00:09:57,887 --> 00:10:00,426
But why photos of us? What does it mean?
242
00:10:00,496 --> 00:10:02,160
That we're the bar.
243
00:10:02,256 --> 00:10:03,975
- The bar's inside us.
- (Gretchen gasps)
244
00:10:04,019 --> 00:10:05,665
There's something on the back.
245
00:10:05,700 --> 00:10:07,719
It's a map.
246
00:10:07,754 --> 00:10:08,896
But of what?
247
00:10:10,055 --> 00:10:11,646
Looks like titty veins.
248
00:10:11,693 --> 00:10:12,634
(giggles)
249
00:10:12,791 --> 00:10:15,293
Train lines, maybe?
250
00:10:15,328 --> 00:10:17,210
Do we know anyone who's
knowledgeable about trains?
251
00:10:17,245 --> 00:10:19,555
Paul is a long-time t... No!
252
00:10:19,614 --> 00:10:21,381
Beetlejuice, bitch!
253
00:10:24,772 --> 00:10:28,477
(crowd chatter)
254
00:10:28,633 --> 00:10:30,146
W?i, everybody.
255
00:10:30,179 --> 00:10:33,527
I bring Boba, or bubble tea.
256
00:10:33,562 --> 00:10:36,711
Oh, no! Aah! Oh, no!
257
00:10:37,340 --> 00:10:39,711
- I'll just have a sip of yours.
- No, you won't.
258
00:10:41,814 --> 00:10:44,208
You girls and your antics. (laughs)
259
00:10:44,263 --> 00:10:47,739
Okay, so, the blank map
260
00:10:47,796 --> 00:10:52,696
you sent me is indeed the old
Pacific Electric Railway system.
261
00:10:52,774 --> 00:10:57,252
And you see here is the one
spot they erased from your map.
262
00:10:57,291 --> 00:10:59,675
We are standing in the exact spot
263
00:10:59,708 --> 00:11:04,014
of the missing Red Car station for
what is now known as "Chinatown,"
264
00:11:04,047 --> 00:11:06,233
or... (speaking Chinese)
265
00:11:06,303 --> 00:11:08,719
It's got to be the fortune cookie factory.
266
00:11:08,751 --> 00:11:10,954
- (gasps)
- (exhales)
267
00:11:12,527 --> 00:11:13,729
Come on, Lindser.
268
00:11:13,764 --> 00:11:16,621
Don't you want to come with
your husband whom you love so?
269
00:11:16,656 --> 00:11:19,585
Yes, Lindsay, do come!
270
00:11:19,687 --> 00:11:21,086
I'm busy.
271
00:11:21,121 --> 00:11:22,231
Oh.
272
00:11:22,265 --> 00:11:24,934
- (sighs heavily)
- Okay, well...
273
00:11:24,967 --> 00:11:26,535
(Paul speaks Chinese)
274
00:11:27,028 --> 00:11:28,113
How's it going?
275
00:11:28,166 --> 00:11:31,000
I went off my meds because
my dick didn't work,
276
00:11:31,054 --> 00:11:32,761
and now I'm totally
freaked out by everything,
277
00:11:32,816 --> 00:11:37,003
but this pot is mellowing me out, so,
278
00:11:37,079 --> 00:11:39,215
that's an illegal temporary fix.
279
00:11:39,249 --> 00:11:41,732
- (rhythmic drumming)
- How about you?
280
00:11:41,795 --> 00:11:45,922
I have to Gone Girl myself
and start over where nobody knows me.
281
00:11:46,011 --> 00:11:48,762
I'm the hottest girl by, like, millions,
282
00:11:48,841 --> 00:11:51,531
because, you know, America.
283
00:11:51,566 --> 00:11:53,755
- (firecrackers popping)
- You know, the scariest thing for me
284
00:11:53,791 --> 00:11:57,287
was to decide that I needed to try
to figure out my stuff on my own,
285
00:11:57,322 --> 00:11:59,709
not just what they tell me to do.
286
00:11:59,744 --> 00:12:02,559
Maybe before you do something drastic,
287
00:12:02,661 --> 00:12:04,573
why not just try the thing
you're most afraid of?
288
00:12:04,606 --> 00:12:06,433
You mean ask Paul to accommodate my needs
289
00:12:06,514 --> 00:12:08,753
within the confines of the marriage?
290
00:12:08,831 --> 00:12:10,791
You had that right in
the chamber, didn't you?
291
00:12:11,525 --> 00:12:13,455
I mean, sure.
292
00:12:14,377 --> 00:12:15,992
Why not?
293
00:12:16,027 --> 00:12:17,677
So everything triggers you?
294
00:12:17,712 --> 00:12:19,907
- (fireworks popping)
- Oh, yeah.
295
00:12:19,942 --> 00:12:22,652
I'm worse than ever.
Even, like, small noises
296
00:12:22,714 --> 00:12:24,899
or someone yelling will
just send me, like, to...
297
00:12:24,934 --> 00:12:27,521
Edgar? Turn around.
298
00:12:27,556 --> 00:12:31,492
(drumming, firecrackers popping)
299
00:12:38,065 --> 00:12:40,121
Has that been going on for a while?
300
00:12:41,425 --> 00:12:43,080
Holy shit.
301
00:12:43,143 --> 00:12:45,381
I didn't even flinch.
302
00:12:49,593 --> 00:12:51,479
I'll be right... I'll be right back.
303
00:12:52,028 --> 00:12:55,087
"The sun always shines after a downpour."
304
00:12:55,173 --> 00:12:57,785
Well, first of all,
meteorologically inaccurate.
305
00:12:57,869 --> 00:12:59,810
Second of all, meaningless.
I don't think the clues
306
00:12:59,867 --> 00:13:02,376
- are in the fortunes.
- (Paul groans)
307
00:13:02,462 --> 00:13:04,559
I shouldn't have inhaled
all that slippery shrimp.
308
00:13:04,616 --> 00:13:06,920
I'd already chugged the egg drop soup.
309
00:13:06,982 --> 00:13:08,830
And that whole fried fish.
310
00:13:08,862 --> 00:13:11,101
I have such a weakness
for Cantonese, Sichuan,
311
00:13:11,163 --> 00:13:13,833
Shandong and Zhejiang cuisines.
312
00:13:13,895 --> 00:13:17,045
Jiangsu I'm a little iffy on.
313
00:13:17,872 --> 00:13:21,410
Ooh. Anything to eat in there?
314
00:13:21,443 --> 00:13:22,677
(Edgar panting)
315
00:13:23,623 --> 00:13:25,681
Immersion therapy.
316
00:13:26,915 --> 00:13:28,349
(siren wailing, train bell clanging)
317
00:13:28,382 --> 00:13:30,184
(shouting): Are you sure about this?
318
00:13:30,218 --> 00:13:32,887
(train whistle blowing, Edgar inhales)
319
00:13:34,884 --> 00:13:36,887
320
00:13:42,784 --> 00:13:44,366
Do it!
321
00:13:44,399 --> 00:13:45,734
Ah
322
00:13:48,102 --> 00:13:49,905
Ah
323
00:13:52,272 --> 00:13:54,308
Ah
324
00:13:56,578 --> 00:14:00,714
Ah
325
00:14:00,747 --> 00:14:04,386
As the day sets into the sky
326
00:14:04,419 --> 00:14:08,256
Bottle rockets
327
00:14:08,289 --> 00:14:11,893
Mothers are calling
328
00:14:11,925 --> 00:14:15,763
It's time to come home
329
00:14:18,433 --> 00:14:19,900
Oh
330
00:14:19,934 --> 00:14:22,136
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
331
00:14:22,170 --> 00:14:24,405
Oh
332
00:14:24,439 --> 00:14:26,942
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
333
00:14:26,974 --> 00:14:29,910
Oh
334
00:14:29,944 --> 00:14:32,280
It's time to come home
335
00:14:32,313 --> 00:14:35,283
Ooh-upa,
ooh-upa, ooh-upa
336
00:14:35,315 --> 00:14:37,785
337
00:14:37,819 --> 00:14:41,990
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
338
00:14:42,022 --> 00:14:44,593
Ooh, ooh, ooh,
ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
339
00:14:44,626 --> 00:14:48,497
Ooh, ooh-ooh,
ooh-ooh, ooh...
340
00:14:50,131 --> 00:14:51,800
(Edgar groans)
341
00:14:51,833 --> 00:14:53,651
Hey. Hey, wait.
342
00:14:53,705 --> 00:14:54,969
Oh, stop.
343
00:14:55,002 --> 00:14:56,604
(sighs)
344
00:14:57,062 --> 00:14:58,180
You okay?
345
00:14:58,338 --> 00:15:00,141
(sighs, panting)
346
00:15:01,309 --> 00:15:03,443
(panting loudly)
347
00:15:03,534 --> 00:15:05,005
I did it.
348
00:15:05,713 --> 00:15:07,066
- (laughs)
- GRETCHEN: Okay.
349
00:15:07,124 --> 00:15:08,487
Come on, guys. Let's get serious.
350
00:15:08,556 --> 00:15:10,445
- What's the next clue?
- (mocking): What's the next clue?
351
00:15:10,500 --> 00:15:11,584
- Stop it!
- Stop it!
352
00:15:11,639 --> 00:15:15,188
There is nothing here.
We have wasted a whole day!
353
00:15:15,798 --> 00:15:16,847
Look. Look.
354
00:15:16,896 --> 00:15:19,256
- Oh, look, look.
- Shut up, asshole,
355
00:15:19,320 --> 00:15:20,713
and look at the dragon!
356
00:15:20,766 --> 00:15:23,682
You are a genius.
357
00:15:23,830 --> 00:15:25,466
(inhaling)
358
00:15:26,357 --> 00:15:27,756
That's it.
359
00:15:30,704 --> 00:15:32,172
(beeping)
360
00:15:33,327 --> 00:15:34,708
If it gave me a virus, I'll...
361
00:15:34,742 --> 00:15:36,343
(chimes)
362
00:15:36,490 --> 00:15:38,887
- GRETCHEN: Holy shit.
- It's taken over my phone.
363
00:15:38,922 --> 00:15:40,558
Give me back my phone!
364
00:15:40,681 --> 00:15:44,685
(slow beeping)
365
00:15:54,308 --> 00:15:55,733
This way.
366
00:16:00,668 --> 00:16:03,875
(steady beeping)
367
00:16:04,976 --> 00:16:07,046
(beeping accelerating)
368
00:16:10,198 --> 00:16:11,667
(rapid beeping)
369
00:16:11,700 --> 00:16:13,201
- (phone dinging)
- This has to be it.
370
00:16:14,332 --> 00:16:15,671
I'm tired.
371
00:16:15,704 --> 00:16:17,120
Let's just go to a bar.
372
00:16:17,191 --> 00:16:19,196
PAUL: This does seem fruitless.
373
00:16:19,231 --> 00:16:21,676
Plus, my stomach isn't quieting down.
374
00:16:21,946 --> 00:16:24,243
Yes, Jimmy. You got this.
375
00:16:24,313 --> 00:16:26,403
Go, boy. Get us to that bar.
376
00:16:27,036 --> 00:16:28,611
It's the symbol.
377
00:16:28,666 --> 00:16:30,185
Right there.
378
00:16:30,608 --> 00:16:33,328
The wire is the arc.
379
00:16:33,420 --> 00:16:35,753
The street is the line.
380
00:16:36,856 --> 00:16:38,975
GRETCHEN: The house is the triangle!
381
00:16:39,300 --> 00:16:40,198
It's the house.
382
00:16:40,264 --> 00:16:41,880
The bar is the house!
383
00:16:41,930 --> 00:16:44,932
384
00:16:44,966 --> 00:16:46,800
Of course it's gonna look
like not the thing.
385
00:16:46,874 --> 00:16:49,896
That's the whole stupid
point of stupid speakeasies.
386
00:16:49,951 --> 00:16:50,985
(knocking)
387
00:16:51,020 --> 00:16:52,413
- (exhales)
- Yeah, but...
388
00:16:52,448 --> 00:16:54,265
this really doesn't look like the thing.
389
00:16:54,300 --> 00:16:55,505
Shut up. Have faith.
390
00:16:55,576 --> 00:16:57,078
(people speaking indistinctly inside)
391
00:16:59,274 --> 00:17:00,713
_
392
00:17:00,748 --> 00:17:02,918
(woman speaking Spanish)
393
00:17:03,063 --> 00:17:04,706
Oh, uh...
394
00:17:04,741 --> 00:17:07,412
I'm sorry, wrong address?
395
00:17:08,209 --> 00:17:09,802
_
396
00:17:12,579 --> 00:17:14,966
Well, great, Gretch. You wasted
397
00:17:15,028 --> 00:17:17,465
- this entire Sunday Funday.
- You have been
398
00:17:17,498 --> 00:17:20,001
a gigantic bitch all
day, and I'm sick of it.
399
00:17:21,993 --> 00:17:23,855
Oh, are we seriously gonna do this?
400
00:17:23,910 --> 00:17:26,600
Because I've been waiting my
whole goddamn life to do this.
401
00:17:26,670 --> 00:17:28,793
I was born to do this!
402
00:17:28,854 --> 00:17:31,024
They were too happy.
403
00:17:33,037 --> 00:17:36,285
They were too happy. No families are happy!
404
00:17:36,317 --> 00:17:37,585
(grunting)
405
00:17:37,977 --> 00:17:38,972
They were actors.
406
00:17:39,007 --> 00:17:41,099
Jimmy, I think this is over.
407
00:17:41,161 --> 00:17:45,982
No. In battle, we risk all
for a taste of the immortal.
408
00:17:46,052 --> 00:17:48,333
In retreat, sure, we lose nothing,
409
00:17:48,391 --> 00:17:52,783
but what we gain is far worse than nothing:
410
00:17:52,845 --> 00:17:53,851
Ignominy.
411
00:17:53,886 --> 00:17:56,103
And shame.
412
00:17:56,136 --> 00:17:58,157
We don't give up because they make us.
413
00:17:58,222 --> 00:18:00,550
We give up because we're lazy!
414
00:18:00,585 --> 00:18:03,612
Or would rather drink and
watch Treehouse Masters.
415
00:18:03,644 --> 00:18:06,682
Plus, no one tells my girl
she can't go to their bar!
416
00:18:06,752 --> 00:18:08,925
I can go anywhere!
417
00:18:08,977 --> 00:18:11,528
Except Nina's... she's mad for some reason.
418
00:18:11,582 --> 00:18:12,487
And Ye Rustic.
419
00:18:12,519 --> 00:18:15,061
The Ace Hotel. Saddleranch.
Sagebrush Cantina.
420
00:18:15,100 --> 00:18:18,045
The Alcove. 4100. The
Tap Room at the Langham.
421
00:18:18,080 --> 00:18:22,464
Oh, my God. How was I supposed
to know Wolf Blitzer was married?
422
00:18:22,536 --> 00:18:25,628
Once more unto the breach.
423
00:18:27,235 --> 00:18:28,971
(both yelling)
424
00:18:29,004 --> 00:18:30,717
GRETCHEN: It's gonna be somewhere weird!
425
00:18:30,791 --> 00:18:32,561
A closet, a wardrobe, the fridge!
426
00:18:32,625 --> 00:18:33,627
Go!
427
00:18:33,809 --> 00:18:34,940
_
428
00:18:35,367 --> 00:18:36,415
_
429
00:18:36,450 --> 00:18:37,257
_
430
00:18:37,869 --> 00:18:38,753
_
431
00:18:38,788 --> 00:18:40,119
_
432
00:18:40,257 --> 00:18:43,182
- I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
- (shouting)
433
00:18:43,217 --> 00:18:45,327
Ha. Nice touch.
434
00:18:47,344 --> 00:18:48,568
_
435
00:18:48,789 --> 00:18:50,187
Upstairs.
436
00:18:50,383 --> 00:18:51,220
_
437
00:18:51,255 --> 00:18:52,661
- Huh?
- _
438
00:18:52,696 --> 00:18:55,362
I don't understand what you're saying.
439
00:18:55,397 --> 00:18:56,496
_
440
00:18:56,537 --> 00:18:58,661
Ooh, flautas.
441
00:18:58,700 --> 00:18:59,414
_
442
00:18:59,462 --> 00:19:01,198
Mexico's spring roll.
443
00:19:01,232 --> 00:19:02,730
_
444
00:19:09,944 --> 00:19:11,165
(screaming)
445
00:19:11,239 --> 00:19:12,817
- Oh, nice acting, dummies.
- _
446
00:19:12,881 --> 00:19:14,147
- It's got to be in here.
- _
447
00:19:14,181 --> 00:19:15,035
_
448
00:19:15,108 --> 00:19:16,365
_
449
00:19:16,399 --> 00:19:17,525
_
450
00:19:17,575 --> 00:19:18,616
_
451
00:19:18,651 --> 00:19:19,847
_
452
00:19:19,890 --> 00:19:20,969
_
453
00:19:21,004 --> 00:19:23,441
(toy squeaking)
454
00:19:23,475 --> 00:19:25,858
_
455
00:19:26,429 --> 00:19:28,287
I really thought they were actors.
456
00:19:28,357 --> 00:19:30,168
It's okay, Jimmy. We tried.
457
00:19:30,214 --> 00:19:32,652
It's cool, man.
458
00:19:32,730 --> 00:19:34,870
Why are you so relaxed?
459
00:19:34,902 --> 00:19:36,742
Exactly.
460
00:19:36,777 --> 00:19:39,311
Wait, the police let you keep your drugs?
461
00:19:39,359 --> 00:19:40,560
So incompetent.
462
00:19:40,595 --> 00:19:43,889
- (stomach grumbling)
- Excuse me! It is with great distress
463
00:19:43,960 --> 00:19:46,170
that I must ask for a moment of privacy.
464
00:19:46,205 --> 00:19:49,342
No, Paul! You are not
using the toilet in here.
465
00:19:49,424 --> 00:19:50,948
PAUL: Were that I could make it so, wife,
466
00:19:50,983 --> 00:19:53,219
but the situation has become dire.
467
00:19:53,254 --> 00:19:54,923
GRETCHEN: Lindser, I'm sorry.
468
00:19:54,956 --> 00:19:57,225
Even though it's super boring for me,
469
00:19:57,322 --> 00:20:00,515
and believe me girl, it
is like TED Talk boring.
470
00:20:00,573 --> 00:20:03,062
But it's my job to listen no matter what.
471
00:20:03,097 --> 00:20:05,905
- (panting)
- LINDSAY: But you're right.
472
00:20:05,967 --> 00:20:08,709
Sometimes I do wish he
would just disappear.
473
00:20:08,744 --> 00:20:09,981
(wall closes)
474
00:20:11,376 --> 00:20:12,711
(gasps)
475
00:20:14,467 --> 00:20:16,386
I'm a witch.
476
00:20:17,409 --> 00:20:19,914
I wish for $100.
477
00:20:19,948 --> 00:20:21,450
Gather 'round quick.
478
00:20:26,621 --> 00:20:30,825
(latches opening, all laughing excitedly)
479
00:20:36,463 --> 00:20:39,467
(Edgar giggles)
480
00:20:56,351 --> 00:20:59,454
(jazz music playing,
people talking indistinctly)
481
00:20:59,487 --> 00:21:03,124
(applause)
482
00:21:03,656 --> 00:21:05,188
Welcome, players.
483
00:21:05,262 --> 00:21:08,630
You have traversed a great
and difficult distance.
484
00:21:08,685 --> 00:21:10,279
Congratulations.
485
00:21:10,314 --> 00:21:13,161
A night like no other awaits.
486
00:21:13,208 --> 00:21:14,036
JIMMY: Thank you.
487
00:21:14,068 --> 00:21:16,513
My, it was an ordeal indeed.
488
00:21:16,548 --> 00:21:18,368
I have so many questions!
489
00:21:24,171 --> 00:21:26,311
Two rye Manhattans please.
490
00:21:26,346 --> 00:21:27,758
That'll be $42.
491
00:21:27,793 --> 00:21:29,758
Oh, my God, you got to be shitting me.
492
00:21:33,020 --> 00:21:35,411
I'm sorry, Jimmy. This place sucks.
493
00:21:35,477 --> 00:21:36,665
Speakeasies are lame.
494
00:21:36,718 --> 00:21:38,187
Well, I told you.
495
00:21:38,392 --> 00:21:40,185
But I found it for you.
496
00:21:40,269 --> 00:21:42,773
- I beat them.
- We wanted each other to be happy.
497
00:21:42,825 --> 00:21:43,859
Pfft.
498
00:21:46,532 --> 00:21:48,611
(gasps) Ah, there you are.
499
00:21:48,646 --> 00:21:50,559
Excellent work with the QR code.
500
00:21:50,594 --> 00:21:52,234
Let-let me ask you about the, uh...
501
00:21:52,343 --> 00:21:54,335
masturbating homeless man. Was he...
502
00:21:54,398 --> 00:21:56,344
Why didn't you want to be with me today?
503
00:21:57,781 --> 00:22:01,916
Paul, I can't pretend to be
someone I think you'd like anymore.
504
00:22:01,950 --> 00:22:04,695
If we have any chance, I
have to tell you what I want,
505
00:22:04,752 --> 00:22:07,041
and you have to decide if
you can live with it or not.
506
00:22:07,088 --> 00:22:10,448
All I've ever wanted is the real Lindsay.
507
00:22:10,499 --> 00:22:11,467
Tell me.
508
00:22:11,537 --> 00:22:15,075
- Your wish is my...
- I want to bone other guys.
509
00:22:16,041 --> 00:22:18,094
- Physically.
- Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
510
00:22:18,149 --> 00:22:20,450
(sing-songy): No, no, no. Jimmy.
511
00:22:21,359 --> 00:22:22,496
What?
512
00:22:22,556 --> 00:22:23,487
You can't do that.
513
00:22:23,569 --> 00:22:26,113
- That would break my heart.
- No, Paul,
514
00:22:26,148 --> 00:22:28,559
it's for us.
515
00:22:28,594 --> 00:22:30,496
You can watch.
516
00:22:30,531 --> 00:22:32,723
I mean, I'd like you to watch.
517
00:22:32,758 --> 00:22:35,917
I want to be a family, but
I also want to be happy.
518
00:22:36,602 --> 00:22:39,188
You want me to be happy, right?
519
00:22:43,718 --> 00:22:46,769
- I consent.
- (gasps) Yay!
520
00:22:46,804 --> 00:22:47,580
Mm!
521
00:22:47,615 --> 00:22:49,750
I love you so much.
522
00:22:49,788 --> 00:22:52,185
This is going to be so good for us.
523
00:22:52,267 --> 00:22:56,071
(exhales, then soft chuckle)
524
00:22:56,165 --> 00:22:57,825
Family.
525
00:22:57,860 --> 00:22:59,908
Oh, it's right time...
526
00:22:59,940 --> 00:23:02,035
JIMMY: Hello, hipster dorks
527
00:23:02,075 --> 00:23:03,386
- (music stops)
- of the speakeasy.
528
00:23:03,421 --> 00:23:05,017
- (man whoops)
- My name...
529
00:23:05,086 --> 00:23:07,456
is Jimmy Shive-Overly.
530
00:23:07,574 --> 00:23:10,427
And I'm gonna sing you a song!
531
00:23:12,653 --> 00:23:14,155
(jazz music plays)
532
00:23:16,019 --> 00:23:17,926
Happy toes
533
00:23:17,959 --> 00:23:20,838
Time to say good-bye to woes
534
00:23:20,873 --> 00:23:23,731
Every Jack and Jill knows
535
00:23:23,801 --> 00:23:26,597
She's the gal for me
536
00:23:27,995 --> 00:23:29,771
Happy toes
537
00:23:29,804 --> 00:23:32,621
Happiness I will impose
538
00:23:32,696 --> 00:23:33,540
From New York
539
00:23:33,575 --> 00:23:35,897
To Idahos
540
00:23:35,932 --> 00:23:40,267
'Cause I'm in L.O.V.E. I'm in love
541
00:23:40,349 --> 00:23:42,447
This is the last Sunday Funday, isn't it?
542
00:23:42,482 --> 00:23:44,717
- Oh, yeah.
-
...decompose
543
00:23:44,759 --> 00:23:47,790
Smiles fell like dominoes
544
00:23:47,825 --> 00:23:51,734
I've lost my gal
545
00:23:51,814 --> 00:23:54,800
So if you see her, tell her please
546
00:23:54,851 --> 00:23:55,500
That...
547
00:23:55,550 --> 00:24:00,100
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