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( theme music playing )
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ANNOUNCER:
Last week on Taxi:
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00:01:13,133 --> 00:01:14,801
Yeah, you might
say that, Louie.
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00:01:14,834 --> 00:01:17,567
You know, the cabs, they been
falling apart lately,
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00:01:17,601 --> 00:01:20,067
and Tony's brakes--
they just went out on him.
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00:01:20,100 --> 00:01:22,400
I mean, every time
we go out of here, our lives are in danger,
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and we think
it's about time you do something about it.
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00:01:24,534 --> 00:01:26,467
Go blow-dry your face.
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What are you...?
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00:01:28,033 --> 00:01:28,968
Hey! Hey!
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Nardo's your new
shop steward, huh?
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00:01:35,367 --> 00:01:37,000
Wise choice.
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( snickering )
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00:01:38,501 --> 00:01:40,901
And I also said
that we're on strike.
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00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:44,501
( chanting ):
Shut it down! Shut it down!
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00:01:44,534 --> 00:01:45,968
Shut it down!
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00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:47,634
Shut it down!
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00:01:47,667 --> 00:01:50,334
One date to save
cabbies' lives.
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00:01:52,834 --> 00:01:55,634
You'd give in
to all of our demands...
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00:01:55,667 --> 00:01:58,100
if I go on one date with you?
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00:01:58,133 --> 00:02:01,534
You're taking advantage
of something that's really decent in me
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00:02:01,567 --> 00:02:03,834
to satisfy some
indecent needs of your own.
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00:02:03,868 --> 00:02:05,367
How does that
make you feel?
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00:02:05,400 --> 00:02:08,467
Horny as all get-out.
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00:02:12,501 --> 00:02:15,100
( whistling )
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00:02:21,100 --> 00:02:22,367
Well, welcome back, boys.
27
00:02:22,400 --> 00:02:23,934
Don't get your
hopes up, Louie.
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00:02:23,968 --> 00:02:25,501
These negotiations
fall through
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00:02:25,534 --> 00:02:26,701
between you and Elaine,
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00:02:26,734 --> 00:02:28,834
we're going right back
to the picket line.
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00:02:28,868 --> 00:02:31,667
Oh, they're not going to
fall through, Wheeler. Uh-uh.
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00:02:31,701 --> 00:02:33,767
By the way, what
concessions did you make?
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00:02:33,801 --> 00:02:37,767
I'm not allowed to discuss that
until after the negotiations.
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00:02:37,801 --> 00:02:40,834
Haven't you ever heard
of the Taft-Hartley Act?
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00:02:40,868 --> 00:02:45,167
Hey, I used to see them
on The Ed Sullivan Show.
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00:02:45,200 --> 00:02:47,767
Taft was the goofy one,
right?
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00:02:51,100 --> 00:02:54,133
( humming )
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00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:57,834
* That's why the lady
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00:02:57,868 --> 00:02:59,634
* That's why the lady
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00:02:59,667 --> 00:03:00,868
* That's why the lady
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00:03:00,901 --> 00:03:02,834
* Is a tramp,
tramp, tramp, tramp... *
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00:03:02,868 --> 00:03:05,234
You know,
there's something weird here?
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00:03:05,267 --> 00:03:06,767
Yesterday, we were
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00:03:06,801 --> 00:03:08,300
at a total impasse.
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00:03:08,334 --> 00:03:10,067
Today, everything's fine.
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00:03:10,100 --> 00:03:12,834
Hey, Alex, listen. Elaine
says everything's going fine,
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00:03:12,868 --> 00:03:14,367
and we just have
to trust her.
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00:03:14,400 --> 00:03:16,801
By the way,
where is Elaine tonight?
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00:03:16,834 --> 00:03:19,067
She sad she was going
to take the night off to rest.
50
00:03:19,100 --> 00:03:21,601
Yeah. You know,
I think the pressure of being shop steward
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00:03:21,634 --> 00:03:22,901
is finally
getting to Elaine.
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00:03:22,934 --> 00:03:25,133
Why do you say that?
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00:03:25,167 --> 00:03:27,267
You know how, like,
when she gets nervous,
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00:03:27,300 --> 00:03:28,801
she starts
biting fingernails?
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00:03:28,834 --> 00:03:30,601
Well, today,
she started in on mine.
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00:03:30,634 --> 00:03:32,000
Hey, uh... guys.
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00:03:32,033 --> 00:03:35,501
I need your opinion here
on which is the best aftershave.
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00:03:35,534 --> 00:03:37,234
Oh, Louie.
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00:03:37,267 --> 00:03:39,601
Okeydoke.
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00:03:41,634 --> 00:03:43,367
The best-smelling.
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00:03:43,400 --> 00:03:44,834
Jeesh!
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00:03:44,868 --> 00:03:47,033
Rieger, I think
your honker
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00:03:47,067 --> 00:03:49,467
is most suited
for this task.
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00:03:50,934 --> 00:03:52,400
I mean, uh...
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00:03:56,367 --> 00:03:57,667
I mean,
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00:03:57,701 --> 00:04:00,400
you could smell these things
from home.
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00:04:02,734 --> 00:04:04,200
Go on.
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00:04:04,234 --> 00:04:05,901
( sniffs )
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00:04:09,167 --> 00:04:10,934
That one seems ideal.
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00:04:10,968 --> 00:04:13,133
My choice, too.
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00:04:13,167 --> 00:04:15,334
"Cruel Cavalier."
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00:04:15,367 --> 00:04:19,267
Won't be a mosquito
near him all night.
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00:04:19,300 --> 00:04:22,767
Boy, Elaine sure turned out
to be a good shop steward.
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00:04:22,801 --> 00:04:26,400
I'm hoping she turns out
to be a great one.
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00:04:26,434 --> 00:04:28,601
There's something
strange going on.
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00:04:28,634 --> 00:04:31,968
What did you say
Elaine was doing tonight?
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00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:34,968
I told you.
She was going to take a night off--
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00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:37,567
get her mind off work.
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00:04:37,601 --> 00:04:39,200
Boy.
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00:04:39,234 --> 00:04:43,000
I don't know why they put so
many pins in these new shirts.
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00:04:43,033 --> 00:04:45,300
Takes you an hour
to get them off.
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00:04:45,334 --> 00:04:47,534
Hey, Lou, just what
is it exactly
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00:04:47,567 --> 00:04:50,000
you're getting
prepared for tonight?
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00:04:50,033 --> 00:04:52,567
Oh, I got a little
social engagement.
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00:04:52,601 --> 00:04:53,968
( chuckling )
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00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:56,968
I don't even know
why I'm putting this shirt on.
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00:04:57,000 --> 00:05:00,834
In a couple of hours, it's
going to be ripped from my body.
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00:05:00,868 --> 00:05:02,334
Hey, if you guys will excuse me,
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00:05:02,367 --> 00:05:04,300
I'm going to go over
to Elaine's apartment
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00:05:04,334 --> 00:05:05,467
and see how she's doing.
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00:05:05,501 --> 00:05:06,601
All right.
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00:05:06,634 --> 00:05:07,968
Okay. Say hi.
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00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:09,300
Hey, Rieger.
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00:05:09,334 --> 00:05:11,434
You got a clean handkerchief
on you?
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00:05:13,501 --> 00:05:15,501
Thanks.
96
00:05:21,701 --> 00:05:24,200
Welcome back, Rieger.
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00:05:24,234 --> 00:05:25,834
Hey, Lou, you missed
one of the pins.
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00:05:25,868 --> 00:05:27,334
Where?
Here.
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00:05:27,367 --> 00:05:28,467
Ow!
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00:05:28,501 --> 00:05:29,901
Nice to be back, Lou.
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00:05:43,701 --> 00:05:45,367
( doorbell rings )
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00:05:45,400 --> 00:05:48,734
You're early,
and she doesn't live here,
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00:05:48,767 --> 00:05:50,934
and I have
a headache!
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00:05:50,968 --> 00:05:52,634
Oh, God. It's true.
105
00:05:52,667 --> 00:05:54,567
Oh, Alex, what
are you doing here?
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00:05:54,601 --> 00:05:56,367
Who were you expecting, Elaine?
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00:05:56,400 --> 00:05:58,868
My date.
Uh... somebody you don't know.
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00:05:58,901 --> 00:06:01,033
Oh? Tell me about him.
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00:06:01,067 --> 00:06:05,067
Oh, well, uh, his name is Joe,
and he's a tall blond doctor,
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00:06:05,100 --> 00:06:08,167
and he likes
me very much, and won't hurt me.
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00:06:10,701 --> 00:06:12,434
Elaine, I know all about it.
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00:06:12,467 --> 00:06:14,434
I just left Louie at the garage
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in mid-drool.
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00:06:17,467 --> 00:06:19,734
I'm absolutely terrified
about this whole thing.
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00:06:19,767 --> 00:06:22,567
I mean, it's the worst thing
that's ever happened to me.
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00:06:22,601 --> 00:06:24,367
Elaine, you don't
have to do this.
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The duties
of a shop steward
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00:06:26,634 --> 00:06:30,100
do not entail mixing
business with terror.
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00:06:30,133 --> 00:06:32,200
It's not part
of a shop steward's duties
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00:06:32,234 --> 00:06:33,534
to date Louie, you know.
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00:06:33,567 --> 00:06:35,701
Stubby Detmuller
never did it.
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00:06:35,734 --> 00:06:37,334
There was that one time
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00:06:37,367 --> 00:06:40,767
when he went out dancing
with Louie on New Year's Eve.
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00:06:40,801 --> 00:06:42,200
I'm just trying
to cheer you up.
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00:06:42,234 --> 00:06:43,934
I don't need cheering up.
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00:06:43,968 --> 00:06:45,501
I need tanking up.
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00:06:45,534 --> 00:06:46,934
( knock at door )
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00:06:46,968 --> 00:06:49,033
Hide me!
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00:06:49,067 --> 00:06:50,567
Open the door
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00:06:50,601 --> 00:06:54,267
and feast your eyeson a 150 pounds of hickey bait!
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00:06:59,267 --> 00:07:01,734
Alex, if I ask
you real nice,
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00:07:01,767 --> 00:07:05,000
will you take
this bottle and beat me senseless?
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00:07:05,033 --> 00:07:07,234
Elaine, want me
to talk to him--
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00:07:07,267 --> 00:07:09,434
tell him
the whole thing's off?
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00:07:09,467 --> 00:07:11,434
No. No, no.
It can't be off.
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00:07:11,467 --> 00:07:12,767
Oh...
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00:07:12,801 --> 00:07:15,100
Oh, I got to go
through with this.
138
00:07:15,133 --> 00:07:16,767
I mean,
it's the only way
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00:07:16,801 --> 00:07:19,033
we're going to
settle the strike.
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00:07:19,067 --> 00:07:22,000
Would you watch him
while I get ready?
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00:07:22,033 --> 00:07:23,434
( knocking )
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00:07:23,467 --> 00:07:24,868
Please open the door!
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00:07:24,901 --> 00:07:27,067
You don't know how long
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00:07:27,100 --> 00:07:30,634
I've waited to feast my eyeson your loveliness.
145
00:07:45,601 --> 00:07:48,033
What are you
doing here, Rieger?
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00:07:48,067 --> 00:07:49,634
Elaine was called away.
147
00:07:49,667 --> 00:07:52,534
I'm the deputy shop steward,
and I'm taking over.
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00:07:52,567 --> 00:07:55,033
Drinky-poo?
149
00:07:55,067 --> 00:07:56,601
Cut the jokes, Rieger.
150
00:07:56,634 --> 00:07:57,834
Where's Nardo?
151
00:07:57,868 --> 00:07:59,834
Ah! My little girl
is getting ready.
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00:07:59,868 --> 00:08:01,834
Well, this gives
me an opportunity
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00:08:01,868 --> 00:08:04,400
to get to know
the man she's dating.
154
00:08:04,434 --> 00:08:06,100
Sit down, young man.
155
00:08:06,133 --> 00:08:07,501
And tell me...
156
00:08:07,534 --> 00:08:09,901
what is it you do
for a living?
157
00:08:09,934 --> 00:08:12,968
What are you talking about,
Rieger?
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00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:15,734
You know I'm a dispatcher.
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00:08:15,767 --> 00:08:17,367
Oh, a dispatcher.
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00:08:17,400 --> 00:08:20,133
I thought you were
much more than that.
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00:08:20,167 --> 00:08:21,834
You seem like vermin.
162
00:08:23,267 --> 00:08:27,300
You're getting in the way
of my good time, Rieger.
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00:08:27,334 --> 00:08:29,934
Now, why don't
you take a powder?
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00:08:29,968 --> 00:08:32,133
Ah, the impatience
of youth.
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00:08:32,167 --> 00:08:33,701
Tell me, young man,
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00:08:33,734 --> 00:08:35,834
are your intentions
honorable here?
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00:08:35,868 --> 00:08:38,434
My intentions, Rieger,
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00:08:38,467 --> 00:08:41,000
are to take a trip
around the moon.
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00:08:41,033 --> 00:08:42,667
Now, where is she?
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00:08:42,701 --> 00:08:44,234
Uh-uh-uh-uh.
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00:08:44,267 --> 00:08:45,701
Just take it easy.
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00:08:45,734 --> 00:08:47,100
Just take it easy.
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00:08:47,133 --> 00:08:48,934
I'll see if she's ready.
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00:08:48,968 --> 00:08:51,267
Elaine, your
young snake is here.
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00:08:51,300 --> 00:08:53,868
What are you talking about,
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00:08:53,901 --> 00:08:55,767
Rieger?
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00:08:55,801 --> 00:08:57,868
Nardo is going
to have the time
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00:08:57,901 --> 00:09:00,167
of her life tonight.
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00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:02,400
I got this
whole evening programmed.
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00:09:02,434 --> 00:09:04,601
There's not a man,
woman, or child
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00:09:04,634 --> 00:09:06,601
that we're going
to bump into tonight
182
00:09:06,634 --> 00:09:07,968
who isn't on my payroll.
183
00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:10,434
I been out all morning
greasing palms.
184
00:09:10,467 --> 00:09:11,701
I'll bet.
185
00:09:11,734 --> 00:09:14,067
( chuckling )
186
00:09:14,100 --> 00:09:16,701
Come on out,
my little vision!
187
00:09:26,501 --> 00:09:29,200
What the hell is this?
188
00:09:29,234 --> 00:09:30,901
Now, now.
The little lady's wise.
189
00:09:30,934 --> 00:09:33,267
There's a lot of flu
going around these days.
190
00:09:33,300 --> 00:09:35,801
You know how easy it is
to pick up a little bug.
191
00:09:35,834 --> 00:09:37,133
I found out.
192
00:09:39,167 --> 00:09:43,067
Nardo, you look like
Nanook of the North.
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00:09:43,100 --> 00:09:45,033
There was nothing
in our agreement
194
00:09:45,067 --> 00:09:46,501
about how I had to dress.
195
00:09:46,534 --> 00:09:48,801
Well, it's getting late.
I've got to go.
196
00:09:48,834 --> 00:09:50,868
I'll leave you two kids
to your fun.
197
00:09:50,901 --> 00:09:53,067
Uh, Louie, don't you think
it would be nice
198
00:09:53,100 --> 00:09:54,434
if Alex came with us?
199
00:09:54,467 --> 00:09:56,734
Now, now, now, Elaine,
come on, you gave your word.
200
00:09:56,767 --> 00:09:58,167
You got to go
through with this.
201
00:09:58,200 --> 00:09:59,534
You got to go through
with it.
202
00:09:59,567 --> 00:10:00,601
Elaine, please. Elaine.
203
00:10:00,634 --> 00:10:02,167
Now listen, Louie.
204
00:10:02,200 --> 00:10:04,300
Incidentally,
all kidding aside,
205
00:10:04,334 --> 00:10:06,400
if you try anything
with Elaine...
206
00:10:06,434 --> 00:10:07,834
and I'll kill you.
207
00:10:07,868 --> 00:10:10,434
It will take
the coroner a week
208
00:10:10,467 --> 00:10:12,734
to pry the grin
off my face.
209
00:10:16,100 --> 00:10:19,334
Besides, you'll
have to catch me.
210
00:10:19,367 --> 00:10:20,834
I'll catch you.
211
00:10:20,868 --> 00:10:23,000
I'll just send
the hounds out
212
00:10:23,033 --> 00:10:26,167
after the scent
of "Cruel Cavalier." Whoo!
213
00:10:38,801 --> 00:10:42,000
Now don't be afraid,
my little one.
214
00:10:42,033 --> 00:10:43,634
Are you ready to take
215
00:10:43,667 --> 00:10:45,701
your magic carpet
ride with me?
216
00:10:45,734 --> 00:10:47,133
( sighs )
217
00:10:47,167 --> 00:10:48,801
One last request?
218
00:10:48,834 --> 00:10:52,567
Could I call my children
at the baby-sitter's?
219
00:10:52,601 --> 00:10:54,400
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
220
00:10:54,434 --> 00:10:55,834
Call the tots.
221
00:10:59,667 --> 00:11:01,901
Tell them hi from Uncle Lou.
222
00:11:05,133 --> 00:11:06,534
Hi, Mrs. Williams.
223
00:11:06,567 --> 00:11:09,601
Yes, I'd like to speak
to my children, please,
224
00:11:09,634 --> 00:11:12,133
uh, both of them,
so could you put
225
00:11:12,167 --> 00:11:14,968
their little ears
to the receiver?
226
00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:16,334
Hi, babies.
227
00:11:16,367 --> 00:11:17,934
( sobbing )
228
00:11:17,968 --> 00:11:21,601
I want you to remember
that no matter what happens...
229
00:11:21,634 --> 00:11:24,300
no matter what you hear
about tonight
230
00:11:24,334 --> 00:11:27,100
I want you to always
remember your mother
231
00:11:27,133 --> 00:11:29,934
the way she was
the last time you saw her--
232
00:11:29,968 --> 00:11:33,334
young and fresh
233
00:11:33,367 --> 00:11:35,667
and happy.
234
00:11:35,701 --> 00:11:37,734
And I love you
very much.
235
00:11:37,767 --> 00:11:39,067
Okay.
236
00:11:39,100 --> 00:11:40,501
( sobbing ):
Okay, good-bye.
237
00:11:40,534 --> 00:11:41,501
( smacking lips )
Good-bye.
238
00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:42,567
( smacking lips )
Good-bye.
239
00:11:42,601 --> 00:11:43,567
Good-bye.
240
00:11:43,601 --> 00:11:45,000
Good-bye.
Good-bye.
241
00:11:47,667 --> 00:11:49,734
Nardo, I don't think
you're going into this
242
00:11:49,767 --> 00:11:51,000
with the right attitude.
243
00:11:54,167 --> 00:11:56,667
Let's just get
this over with.
244
00:11:59,267 --> 00:12:00,834
Allow me.
245
00:12:08,133 --> 00:12:09,667
The ice is broken.
246
00:12:19,934 --> 00:12:23,567
( Hawaiian music plays )
247
00:12:23,601 --> 00:12:24,901
Okay, come on.
248
00:12:24,934 --> 00:12:27,434
Sit right down there.
249
00:12:27,467 --> 00:12:30,434
May I get you one
of our exotic cocktails?
250
00:12:30,467 --> 00:12:31,801
Oh, yes, Fritz.
251
00:12:31,834 --> 00:12:34,067
I'd like two
monsoons, please.
252
00:12:34,100 --> 00:12:36,267
Yes. Very good,
Mr. De Palma.
253
00:12:36,300 --> 00:12:38,300
( chuckles )
254
00:12:45,400 --> 00:12:48,467
You're going to love this drink.
255
00:12:48,501 --> 00:12:50,801
I kind of thought,
Nardo, that we'd have
256
00:12:50,834 --> 00:12:53,734
a little trouble with the
conversation department,
257
00:12:53,767 --> 00:12:57,334
so I took the liberty to
write up some notes here.
258
00:12:57,367 --> 00:12:58,801
I mean, you know,
259
00:12:58,834 --> 00:13:01,534
it's things that
you would say to me
260
00:13:01,567 --> 00:13:03,534
and my answers
back to you.
261
00:13:03,567 --> 00:13:05,701
Here's your copy.
262
00:13:05,734 --> 00:13:09,067
You've written
our entire conversation?
263
00:13:09,100 --> 00:13:12,067
Well, not the whole thing,
but just to get us rolling here.
264
00:13:17,100 --> 00:13:19,234
You have the first line.
265
00:13:19,267 --> 00:13:22,701
"I guess you know
I have two children."
266
00:13:22,734 --> 00:13:24,167
"Ah, children.
267
00:13:24,200 --> 00:13:27,000
"Reminds me of the old phrase:
268
00:13:28,634 --> 00:13:31,834
"'Better is a poor
and wise child
269
00:13:31,868 --> 00:13:35,434
than an old and foolish king.'"
270
00:13:35,467 --> 00:13:36,801
That's interesting.
271
00:13:36,834 --> 00:13:38,801
Read.
272
00:13:38,834 --> 00:13:41,133
"That's interesting."
273
00:13:42,934 --> 00:13:45,701
"It must be hard,
raising two kids
274
00:13:45,734 --> 00:13:48,167
and holding down two jobs."
275
00:13:48,200 --> 00:13:50,734
"Well, I don't complain."
276
00:13:54,234 --> 00:13:56,834
"Should we order dinner now?"
277
00:13:56,868 --> 00:13:59,701
"No, I think we should order
another drink.
278
00:13:59,734 --> 00:14:02,434
I'm really enjoying
our conversation."
279
00:14:04,334 --> 00:14:06,267
Ah.
280
00:14:06,300 --> 00:14:07,734
Here you go.
281
00:14:07,767 --> 00:14:09,701
There you go, sir.
282
00:14:09,734 --> 00:14:11,367
Thank you, Edmundo.
283
00:14:13,901 --> 00:14:15,000
Oh!
284
00:14:15,033 --> 00:14:16,667
Ooh!
285
00:14:16,701 --> 00:14:19,767
( guttural chuckling )
286
00:14:19,801 --> 00:14:22,501
Oh, well, maybe we
better skip down there
287
00:14:22,534 --> 00:14:24,901
because my timing's
a little off here.
288
00:14:24,934 --> 00:14:27,434
That's not my line.
289
00:14:27,467 --> 00:14:30,200
Yeah. Yeah, that's
your line right there.
290
00:14:30,234 --> 00:14:33,400
"You have beautiful eyes."
291
00:14:34,701 --> 00:14:36,367
"Thank you."
292
00:14:36,400 --> 00:14:39,200
"Now, let's tear up
this piece of paper
293
00:14:39,234 --> 00:14:40,701
and dance, stallion."
294
00:14:42,367 --> 00:14:44,934
I'm not going
to dance, Louie.
295
00:14:44,968 --> 00:14:47,267
Nardo, it's not a date
unless you dance with me.
296
00:14:47,300 --> 00:14:49,267
You want to call
the whole thing off?
297
00:14:49,300 --> 00:14:50,601
Do you even know how to dance?
298
00:14:50,634 --> 00:14:51,701
I mean, I like dancing.
299
00:14:51,734 --> 00:14:53,901
I don't want to get out there
and embarrass myself.
300
00:14:53,934 --> 00:14:55,234
Are you kidding?
301
00:14:55,267 --> 00:14:57,701
I do a great tango.
302
00:14:57,734 --> 00:14:59,734
Tango at the Tide Pool?
303
00:14:59,767 --> 00:15:02,501
Yeah. I spent all morning
taking lessons
304
00:15:02,534 --> 00:15:04,334
from a gay Spanish guy.
305
00:15:04,367 --> 00:15:05,767
Louie, look at that band.
306
00:15:05,801 --> 00:15:08,467
They don't even look like
they'd know a tango.
307
00:15:10,467 --> 00:15:11,601
Play, savages!
308
00:15:11,634 --> 00:15:13,267
( drum roll )
309
00:15:23,701 --> 00:15:25,701
( tango playing )
310
00:15:41,534 --> 00:15:43,234
Kick!
311
00:15:43,267 --> 00:15:44,467
Kick!
312
00:15:44,501 --> 00:15:46,033
Kick!
313
00:15:47,634 --> 00:15:50,601
And in and out
314
00:15:50,634 --> 00:15:51,968
and out
315
00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:54,234
and up, and slide, and...
316
00:16:03,801 --> 00:16:05,300
Come on, Fritz!
317
00:16:05,334 --> 00:16:06,834
Get 'em up!
318
00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:29,834
LOUIE:
So the guy says
319
00:16:29,868 --> 00:16:32,033
the guy says to the farmer
320
00:16:32,067 --> 00:16:34,801
"Just give me
what the rooster gets."
321
00:16:34,834 --> 00:16:36,834
( laughing )
322
00:16:46,033 --> 00:16:47,267
Oh, well.
323
00:16:47,300 --> 00:16:51,934
Oh, well, home again,
home again jiggedy-jog.
324
00:16:51,968 --> 00:16:54,234
Home? Is it over?
325
00:16:57,534 --> 00:17:00,067
Well, Elaine,
wasn't that Tide Pool
326
00:17:00,100 --> 00:17:03,200
everything I told you
it was going to be?
327
00:17:03,234 --> 00:17:06,467
I mean, I'll bet
you never been to a place
328
00:17:06,501 --> 00:17:09,968
where the waiter prepares
your food at the table.
329
00:17:10,000 --> 00:17:12,901
Pork chops?
330
00:17:12,934 --> 00:17:15,033
Aw, boy.
You know something?
331
00:17:15,067 --> 00:17:17,968
I never knew that you
were such a drinker.
332
00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:20,567
I mean, you put away
six monsoons,
333
00:17:20,601 --> 00:17:23,434
and that's gotta be
a Tide Pool record.
334
00:17:23,467 --> 00:17:26,400
You don't even look
the least bit sloshed.
335
00:17:26,434 --> 00:17:28,501
And that's not even counting
336
00:17:28,534 --> 00:17:31,801
the three drinks I had
before you arrived.
337
00:17:31,834 --> 00:17:34,834
You had three drinks
before I got here?
338
00:17:34,868 --> 00:17:37,234
To wash down the Valium.
339
00:17:37,267 --> 00:17:39,868
Geez. I thought
something like that
340
00:17:39,901 --> 00:17:41,567
would kill a person.
341
00:17:41,601 --> 00:17:43,701
So did I.
342
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:48,367
Good night, Louie.
343
00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:49,634
What are you...?!
344
00:17:49,667 --> 00:17:52,467
Whoa! What do you mean--
good night?
345
00:17:52,501 --> 00:17:53,801
Evening's young!
346
00:17:53,834 --> 00:17:55,000
Come on, Nardo.
347
00:17:55,033 --> 00:17:57,133
We got leftover
garlic bread
348
00:17:57,167 --> 00:17:58,334
and shrimp puffs.
349
00:17:58,367 --> 00:17:59,434
Come on!
350
00:17:59,467 --> 00:18:02,267
I thought maybe
you'd invite me in
351
00:18:02,300 --> 00:18:04,767
for a little
midnight snack.
352
00:18:04,801 --> 00:18:06,200
Good night, Louie.
353
00:18:06,234 --> 00:18:08,267
The deal's over.
354
00:18:08,300 --> 00:18:10,901
Deal? You're still
talking deal?
355
00:18:10,934 --> 00:18:12,167
Come on, Nardo.
356
00:18:12,200 --> 00:18:15,067
That deal was made when
we were rational people,
357
00:18:15,100 --> 00:18:17,334
not pagans.
358
00:18:18,734 --> 00:18:20,934
Aw, don't blow
that thing again.
359
00:18:20,968 --> 00:18:23,300
Just don't
come near me.
360
00:18:23,334 --> 00:18:25,400
Come on, Louie, it's late.
361
00:18:25,434 --> 00:18:29,300
I just want to go in
and shower and burn my clothes.
362
00:18:29,334 --> 00:18:30,400
Wait, wait.
363
00:18:30,434 --> 00:18:32,400
Hold on, here, Nardo.
364
00:18:32,434 --> 00:18:34,734
I had just about enough of this.
365
00:18:34,767 --> 00:18:37,767
You know, I shelled out
some good money on you tonight.
366
00:18:37,801 --> 00:18:39,901
The least you
could have done
367
00:18:39,934 --> 00:18:42,033
was strip down
to your dress.
368
00:18:42,067 --> 00:18:44,501
I know you're in there
somewhere.
369
00:18:44,534 --> 00:18:47,133
Louie, please, it's been
a long day for both of us.
370
00:18:47,167 --> 00:18:49,200
Now, come on, let's
just say good night.
371
00:18:49,234 --> 00:18:52,834
Okay. Oh, okay, you're right.
372
00:18:52,868 --> 00:18:55,501
Okay, I'm going to go.
373
00:18:55,534 --> 00:18:58,334
But you know something, Elaine?
374
00:18:58,367 --> 00:19:00,167
I mean, if you'd have just...
375
00:19:00,200 --> 00:19:02,267
just relaxed
a little bit tonight,
376
00:19:02,300 --> 00:19:04,601
you might have had a good time.
377
00:19:04,634 --> 00:19:08,701
But, no, no, you won't allow
yourself to have fun with me.
378
00:19:08,734 --> 00:19:10,334
( sighs )
379
00:19:10,367 --> 00:19:13,968
I was looking forward
to it all day.
380
00:19:14,000 --> 00:19:19,701
I mean, I get dressed up
real swell.
381
00:19:19,734 --> 00:19:24,501
Take a beautiful woman
out on the town...
382
00:19:24,534 --> 00:19:28,634
I guess I'm just not
as sophisticated as you.
383
00:19:31,767 --> 00:19:33,601
No "Wait, Louie"?
384
00:19:36,434 --> 00:19:38,701
Okay, so maybe I'm...
385
00:19:38,734 --> 00:19:42,934
I'm a little rough
around the edges, all right?
386
00:19:42,968 --> 00:19:46,601
All I wanted was to have
one classy evening in my life
387
00:19:46,634 --> 00:19:49,934
but most of all, I wanted you
to have a good time,
388
00:19:49,968 --> 00:19:54,300
maybe change
your opinion of me.
389
00:19:58,367 --> 00:19:59,868
Nothing.
390
00:20:08,868 --> 00:20:12,200
If it will make you feel
any better, Elaine,
391
00:20:12,234 --> 00:20:14,434
I didn't have any fun either.
392
00:20:16,734 --> 00:20:21,100
And if you think
that it's impossible
393
00:20:21,133 --> 00:20:24,901
to hurt my feelings,
well, you're wrong.
394
00:20:30,334 --> 00:20:32,367
Just a second, Louie.
395
00:20:37,501 --> 00:20:42,067
If it will make you feel
any better...
396
00:20:42,100 --> 00:20:44,767
the evening wasn't
totally rotten.
397
00:20:48,734 --> 00:20:52,968
Actually, uh...
I almost enjoyed the dancing.
398
00:20:53,000 --> 00:20:54,501
You know?
399
00:20:54,534 --> 00:20:57,901
Especially when everybody
got around in a big circle
400
00:20:57,934 --> 00:20:59,934
you know, and started clapping.
401
00:20:59,968 --> 00:21:01,901
( laughing )
402
00:21:05,567 --> 00:21:07,234
( chuckling )
403
00:21:07,267 --> 00:21:11,133
Enthusiasm like that
doesn't come cheap.
404
00:21:11,167 --> 00:21:13,701
( humming )
405
00:21:16,467 --> 00:21:17,834
Ha-ha!
406
00:21:17,868 --> 00:21:19,167
Ah!
407
00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:20,901
Oh!
408
00:21:20,934 --> 00:21:22,667
Oh, Nardo.
409
00:21:22,701 --> 00:21:24,033
Ah, Louie.
410
00:21:26,901 --> 00:21:28,367
Thank you, Louie.
411
00:21:28,400 --> 00:21:29,567
Yeah?
412
00:21:29,601 --> 00:21:31,000
Yeah. It was okay.
413
00:21:31,033 --> 00:21:32,667
You really mean that?
414
00:21:32,701 --> 00:21:34,934
Yeah, I do.
415
00:21:34,968 --> 00:21:36,067
I knew it.
416
00:21:36,100 --> 00:21:38,367
I knew you
were starting to have fun.
417
00:21:38,400 --> 00:21:39,467
Oh, a little bit.
418
00:21:39,501 --> 00:21:40,868
Just a little?
A little bit.
419
00:21:40,901 --> 00:21:43,100
Aw, Nardo. You know what, Nardo?
420
00:21:43,133 --> 00:21:45,968
You know what would round
this evening out?
421
00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:47,467
A good night kiss.
422
00:21:47,501 --> 00:21:49,100
Oh, come on.
All right, that's it.
423
00:21:49,133 --> 00:21:50,501
Now, come on, come on!
424
00:21:50,534 --> 00:21:52,734
Oh, come on, come on!
425
00:21:52,767 --> 00:21:55,100
Just a little kiss,
come on.
426
00:21:57,968 --> 00:22:01,234
It would mean a lot to me.
427
00:22:01,267 --> 00:22:02,667
Come on.
428
00:22:02,701 --> 00:22:04,834
All right, come on, just
a little peck on my...!
429
00:22:04,868 --> 00:22:05,868
Peck.
430
00:22:06,934 --> 00:22:09,133
Come on!
431
00:22:09,167 --> 00:22:10,734
Come on, just show me
432
00:22:10,767 --> 00:22:13,234
that, like, you know,
this evening wasn't a total disaster,
433
00:22:13,267 --> 00:22:15,634
you don't think
any less of me.
434
00:22:17,534 --> 00:22:19,167
All right, all right.
435
00:22:19,200 --> 00:22:20,434
Here. There.
436
00:22:20,467 --> 00:22:22,834
I'll put the shrimp puffs down.
437
00:22:22,868 --> 00:22:26,133
Okay, I put the garlic bread
there, all right?
438
00:22:26,167 --> 00:22:27,601
Okay? All right.
439
00:22:27,634 --> 00:22:29,267
I'll stand over here.
440
00:22:29,300 --> 00:22:31,667
I'll put my hands
at my sides.
441
00:22:31,701 --> 00:22:32,767
I won't move.
442
00:22:32,801 --> 00:22:34,534
And you can kiss me.
443
00:22:34,567 --> 00:22:36,801
Go ahead. I'll
close my eyes.
444
00:22:36,834 --> 00:22:37,934
Come on.
445
00:22:37,968 --> 00:22:39,300
Come on.
446
00:23:06,934 --> 00:23:08,934
( muffled shouting )
447
00:23:33,334 --> 00:23:36,434
Well...
448
00:23:36,467 --> 00:23:40,067
Thanks. I really
had a good time.
449
00:24:00,634 --> 00:24:03,467
( theme music playing )
450
00:24:27,634 --> 00:24:29,200
WOMAN:
Night, Mr. Walters.
451
00:24:29,234 --> 00:24:30,567
( grunts )
452
00:24:30,617 --> 00:24:35,167
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