Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,835 --> 00:00:05,670
♪ Boy, the way
Glenn Miller played ♪
2
00:00:05,672 --> 00:00:09,340
♪ Songs that made
The hit parade ♪
3
00:00:09,342 --> 00:00:13,011
♪ Guys like us
We had it made ♪
4
00:00:13,013 --> 00:00:16,280
♪ Those were the days ♪
5
00:00:16,282 --> 00:00:19,350
♪ And you knewWhere you were then ♪
6
00:00:19,352 --> 00:00:23,622
♪ Girls were girlsAnd men were men ♪
7
00:00:23,624 --> 00:00:30,394
♪ Mister, we could use a manLike Herbert Hoover again ♪
8
00:00:30,396 --> 00:00:33,031
♪ Didn't needNo welfare state ♪
9
00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:36,534
♪ Everybody pulledHis weight ♪
10
00:00:36,536 --> 00:00:40,872
♪ Gee, our old LaSalleRan great ♪
11
00:00:40,874 --> 00:00:46,678
♪ Those were the days ♪
12
00:00:54,086 --> 00:00:55,754
Hi, Mike.
Hi, honey.
13
00:00:55,756 --> 00:00:57,022
Hi. Where you been?
14
00:00:57,024 --> 00:00:59,057
Out shopping
for a trousseau.
15
00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:00,591
Oh, yeah?
Who's getting married?
16
00:01:00,593 --> 00:01:03,427
Nobody. But someone's
going on a honeymoon.
17
00:01:03,429 --> 00:01:04,896
That's the way to do it,
18
00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:08,166
skip the ceremony
and get right to the essentials.
19
00:01:08,168 --> 00:01:10,835
No, Mike,
that ain't it.
20
00:01:10,837 --> 00:01:14,739
Ma, he's gonna find out pretty
soon anyway. Can I tell him now?
21
00:01:14,741 --> 00:01:19,443
Well, all right. But you gotta
promise not to tell Archie.
22
00:01:19,445 --> 00:01:20,444
Okay.
23
00:01:20,446 --> 00:01:22,413
Ma's going on
a second honeymoon.
24
00:01:22,415 --> 00:01:24,883
With who?
25
00:01:24,885 --> 00:01:26,584
Michael!
26
00:01:26,586 --> 00:01:28,853
Well, you told me not to tell
Archie. I figured, hey, hey!
27
00:01:30,522 --> 00:01:32,123
No, Mike!
28
00:01:32,125 --> 00:01:35,326
See, I wanna keep it
a secret and surprise him
29
00:01:35,328 --> 00:01:38,529
so I ain't telling him
till the night before we leave.
30
00:01:38,531 --> 00:01:39,698
Where are
you going?
31
00:01:39,700 --> 00:01:45,704
The Hotel Atlantic City
in Atlantic City.
32
00:01:45,706 --> 00:01:52,310
It's the same place we spent our
first honeymoon 25 years ago.
33
00:01:52,312 --> 00:01:55,413
Isn't that a great way to
celebrate a 25th anniversary?
34
00:01:55,415 --> 00:01:57,348
Yeah, that's
very romantic, Ma.
35
00:01:57,350 --> 00:01:58,950
What made you think
of a second honeymoon?
36
00:01:58,952 --> 00:02:01,285
I was in
the dentist's office
37
00:02:01,287 --> 00:02:05,289
reading this article
in Cosmopolitan magazine,
38
00:02:05,291 --> 00:02:09,961
"Ten Modern Ways to Keep
Your Marriage Fresh."
39
00:02:09,963 --> 00:02:15,566
Well, the first nine ways were
a little too fresh for Archie.
40
00:02:16,869 --> 00:02:19,037
But the last one said,
41
00:02:19,039 --> 00:02:23,374
"Go on a second honeymoon
and feel like a newlywed again,"
42
00:02:23,376 --> 00:02:24,976
and that's what
we're gonna do.
43
00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:28,579
Honey, wouldn't you like to
go on a second honeymoon?
44
00:02:28,581 --> 00:02:29,580
No.
45
00:02:29,582 --> 00:02:30,749
Why not?
46
00:02:30,751 --> 00:02:32,350
I'm not through
with my first one yet.
47
00:02:32,352 --> 00:02:34,418
ALL: Ohhh!
48
00:02:35,821 --> 00:02:37,588
Mike, while we was gone,
49
00:02:37,590 --> 00:02:40,925
was there a phone call
or a telegram for me?
50
00:02:40,927 --> 00:02:41,993
No, Ma.
51
00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:43,561
Oh, my, the hotel said
52
00:02:43,563 --> 00:02:44,963
they'd let me know
53
00:02:44,965 --> 00:02:49,000
if they could give us the same
room we had 25 years ago.
54
00:02:49,002 --> 00:02:50,001
[DOORBELL RINGS]
55
00:02:50,003 --> 00:02:51,970
Maybe that's the telegram!
56
00:02:51,972 --> 00:02:54,239
I got the idea of the same room
57
00:02:54,241 --> 00:02:57,308
from watching the movie
Plaza Suite.
58
00:02:57,310 --> 00:02:59,110
Oh, hi, Louise.
59
00:02:59,112 --> 00:03:02,280
Hello, honeymoon girl.
Oh!
60
00:03:02,282 --> 00:03:04,282
Hi, there.
Hi, Louise.
61
00:03:04,284 --> 00:03:05,683
Will this be
all right for you?
62
00:03:05,685 --> 00:03:09,487
Oh, Louise, that's beautiful
and it's so light.
63
00:03:09,489 --> 00:03:10,755
It's airplane luggage.
64
00:03:10,757 --> 00:03:12,390
Oh, my.
65
00:03:12,392 --> 00:03:15,559
Oh, but don't worry, Edith,
you can take it on the bus.
66
00:03:16,695 --> 00:03:17,962
That's good.
67
00:03:17,964 --> 00:03:21,032
Mike, would you take this
upstairs to your room?
68
00:03:21,034 --> 00:03:23,501
If Archie sees it,
he may catch on.
69
00:03:23,503 --> 00:03:24,702
Oh, sure, Ma.
70
00:03:24,704 --> 00:03:27,705
Oh, and, Ma, I'd better hide
your new negligee
71
00:03:27,707 --> 00:03:31,910
because if Daddy sees it,
he'll go wild.
72
00:03:31,912 --> 00:03:33,845
You mean, you haven't
told Archie yet?
73
00:03:33,847 --> 00:03:36,247
Oh, no. I ain't gonna tell him
till the last minute.
74
00:03:36,249 --> 00:03:38,316
I wanna surprise him.
75
00:03:38,318 --> 00:03:40,351
Well, the last time
we went away on a weekend,
76
00:03:40,353 --> 00:03:42,287
my husband surprised me.
77
00:03:42,289 --> 00:03:44,789
George and his
practical jokes.
78
00:03:44,791 --> 00:03:46,224
What did he do?
79
00:03:46,226 --> 00:03:52,530
He signed the hotel register
"Mr. and Mrs. George Wallace."
80
00:03:54,666 --> 00:03:58,102
Well, Archie was very nice
on our honeymoon.
81
00:03:58,104 --> 00:04:00,038
He was
the perfect gentleman.
82
00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:03,674
Oh, I'm sorry
to hear that.
83
00:04:03,676 --> 00:04:05,243
Better luck this time.
Oh!
84
00:04:08,113 --> 00:04:10,114
[LAUGHING LOUDLY]
85
00:04:23,562 --> 00:04:26,264
What's with her,
she hit on a number?
86
00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:29,834
No, Archie,
she's just happy.
87
00:04:29,836 --> 00:04:31,302
Yeah?
88
00:04:31,304 --> 00:04:34,672
Well, how come she's so happy
in the middle of the week?
89
00:04:34,674 --> 00:04:36,040
I certainly
ain't happy
90
00:04:36,042 --> 00:04:39,043
and I got a bone to pick
with that son of hers, Lionel.
91
00:04:39,045 --> 00:04:40,211
What happened?
92
00:04:40,213 --> 00:04:41,913
I wanted to go
to the Knicks-Lakers game
93
00:04:41,915 --> 00:04:43,915
but I couldn't get off work
to buy a ticket.
94
00:04:43,917 --> 00:04:45,716
I says to Lionel,
"I'll give you 5 bucks
95
00:04:45,718 --> 00:04:47,518
"if you go into
Madison Square Garden,
96
00:04:47,520 --> 00:04:49,220
stand on line
for a ticket."
97
00:04:49,222 --> 00:04:52,523
That was two days ago. I ain't
seen hide nor hair of him since.
98
00:04:52,525 --> 00:04:53,892
[PHONE RINGING]
I'll get it.
99
00:04:53,894 --> 00:04:55,293
I'll get it!
I'll get it!
100
00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:57,561
Go get it!
101
00:04:57,563 --> 00:04:58,562
EDITH: Hello?
102
00:04:58,564 --> 00:05:00,765
Yes, this is her.
103
00:05:00,767 --> 00:05:03,067
Oh, would you hold on
a minute, please?
104
00:05:03,069 --> 00:05:05,603
Archie, this is a personal call.
105
00:05:07,039 --> 00:05:08,439
What, for me?
106
00:05:08,441 --> 00:05:10,174
No. For me.
107
00:05:10,176 --> 00:05:12,944
Oh, really?
108
00:05:12,946 --> 00:05:14,979
Do you mind?
109
00:05:14,981 --> 00:05:17,548
Why should I mind?
Answer the phone.
110
00:05:17,550 --> 00:05:21,085
I mean, do you mind
leaving the room, please?
111
00:05:26,425 --> 00:05:29,827
I know you ain't talking to me!
112
00:05:30,963 --> 00:05:33,697
Archie, this is private.
113
00:05:33,699 --> 00:05:34,832
Hold it there.
114
00:05:34,834 --> 00:05:37,668
This happens to be my house,
my living room.
115
00:05:37,670 --> 00:05:39,737
That's my
telephone there.
116
00:05:39,739 --> 00:05:42,941
I'm in on all the privates
in this house.
117
00:05:44,944 --> 00:05:46,311
Hello?
118
00:05:46,313 --> 00:05:49,747
Um, there's someone here
in this room
119
00:05:49,749 --> 00:05:52,716
who ain't supposed to hear
what I'm gonna say.
120
00:05:52,718 --> 00:05:58,056
So you talk and I'll go,
"Mm-hm," or "Mm-mm."
121
00:05:58,058 --> 00:05:59,890
Yeah. Yeah.
122
00:05:59,892 --> 00:06:02,693
Go ahead.
123
00:06:02,695 --> 00:06:04,929
Mm-hm.
124
00:06:04,931 --> 00:06:06,931
Mm-hm.
125
00:06:06,933 --> 00:06:12,236
Mm-hm! Oh, thank you!
Yeah. Goodbye.
126
00:06:14,873 --> 00:06:16,640
What was that
all about?
127
00:06:16,642 --> 00:06:18,443
[DOORBELL RINGING]
Oh, I'll get it, I'll get it.
128
00:06:18,445 --> 00:06:21,112
I'll get it!
Get it!
129
00:06:23,248 --> 00:06:25,683
Oh, hi, Lionel.
Hi, Mrs. Bunker.
130
00:06:25,685 --> 00:06:27,285
Where you been
for the last two days?
131
00:06:27,287 --> 00:06:28,987
I came to tell you
about the tickets.
132
00:06:28,989 --> 00:06:30,321
You didn't get it?
133
00:06:30,323 --> 00:06:31,822
No. I got it for you.
134
00:06:31,824 --> 00:06:33,858
You got the ticket!
Oh, whoop-de-do.
135
00:06:33,860 --> 00:06:35,994
Lionel, I could kiss you.
136
00:06:35,996 --> 00:06:37,561
This I gotta see.
137
00:06:38,998 --> 00:06:40,865
Shut up, huh?
138
00:06:40,867 --> 00:06:42,033
What's going on?
139
00:06:42,035 --> 00:06:44,502
There, a ticket to
the Lakers-Knicks game.
140
00:06:44,504 --> 00:06:46,304
There. Eat your
heart out, Meathead.
141
00:06:46,306 --> 00:06:48,906
Oh, and, Lionel,
142
00:06:48,908 --> 00:06:51,775
here's that $2
we was talking about.
143
00:06:51,777 --> 00:06:53,411
Buy yourself
something there.
144
00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:55,480
Hey, wait, wait.
Didn't you say $5?
145
00:06:55,482 --> 00:06:58,716
Well, let's wait and see
if the game is any good, huh?
146
00:07:00,152 --> 00:07:02,286
Hey, this game
is next Sunday.
147
00:07:02,288 --> 00:07:05,689
Next Sunday?
Oh, no, Archie, you can't go!
148
00:07:05,691 --> 00:07:07,492
Why not?
149
00:07:07,494 --> 00:07:12,730
Next Sunday is our
25th anniversary, remember?
150
00:07:12,732 --> 00:07:15,299
Oh, yeah,
yeah, yeah.
151
00:07:15,301 --> 00:07:17,801
Oh, jeez, I'm sorry, Edith,
I forgot all about it.
152
00:07:17,803 --> 00:07:19,603
Don't worry, don't worry.
I'll make good. Don't worry.
153
00:07:19,605 --> 00:07:20,771
Hey, Lionel, come here.
154
00:07:20,773 --> 00:07:22,973
You see the way this is,
I'm in a corner here.
155
00:07:22,975 --> 00:07:24,142
You know, 25th anniversary,
156
00:07:24,144 --> 00:07:27,345
that's one of the biggies.
157
00:07:27,347 --> 00:07:28,946
I don't feel I can
leave Edith alone.
158
00:07:28,948 --> 00:07:30,314
You understand
what I mean?
159
00:07:30,316 --> 00:07:32,716
I know what you mean.
You want me to sell the ticket.
160
00:07:32,718 --> 00:07:34,718
No! I want you to get
another ticket for Edith.
161
00:07:38,123 --> 00:07:39,890
Archie, I don't
wanna go.
162
00:07:39,892 --> 00:07:41,992
You're going!
163
00:07:41,994 --> 00:07:43,561
No. It's impossible,
Mr. Bunker.
164
00:07:43,563 --> 00:07:46,697
There's not another ticket
around. They're all sold out.
165
00:07:46,699 --> 00:07:50,034
Then I gotta
go by myself.
166
00:07:50,036 --> 00:07:52,503
Well, you heard me trying there,
didn't you, with Lionel?
167
00:07:52,505 --> 00:07:54,972
Here, Lionel,
thanks very much.
168
00:07:54,974 --> 00:07:57,108
Thanks for all you've
done for me, really.
169
00:07:57,110 --> 00:07:58,676
That's all right,
Mr. Bunker.
170
00:07:58,678 --> 00:08:00,511
Hey, listen, is it really
your 25th anniversary?
171
00:08:00,513 --> 00:08:01,845
Twenty-fifth, Lionel.
172
00:08:01,847 --> 00:08:03,681
You know this 2 bucks
you gave me?
173
00:08:03,683 --> 00:08:05,083
Yeah?
174
00:08:05,085 --> 00:08:07,552
Buy yourself
something.
175
00:08:15,894 --> 00:08:18,596
What does he expect me to buy
with 2 bucks?
176
00:08:20,065 --> 00:08:23,000
Archie, please
don't go to the game.
177
00:08:23,002 --> 00:08:26,137
I was planning for us
to be together.
178
00:08:26,139 --> 00:08:29,307
We're gonna be together,
Edith, after the game.
179
00:08:29,309 --> 00:08:30,908
I'll come home,
I'll pick you up,
180
00:08:30,910 --> 00:08:32,510
I'll maybe take you out
for a pizza,
181
00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:33,877
a glass of wine
or something.
182
00:08:33,879 --> 00:08:36,747
But it's
our anniversary!
183
00:08:36,749 --> 00:08:38,716
I know it's
our anniversary.
184
00:08:38,718 --> 00:08:41,419
Our anniversary. That's
a fifty-fifty proposition.
185
00:08:41,421 --> 00:08:44,388
What do you wanna do,
spoil my half?
186
00:08:44,390 --> 00:08:46,690
I think you'd better
tell him the surprise now.
187
00:08:46,692 --> 00:08:48,058
Oh, yeah.
188
00:08:48,060 --> 00:08:52,763
I wanted to keep it a secret
till next week, Archie.
189
00:08:52,765 --> 00:08:57,768
Does room 822
mean anything to you?
190
00:08:59,538 --> 00:09:01,772
It's a TV show,
ain't it?
191
00:09:03,008 --> 00:09:04,742
No!
192
00:09:04,744 --> 00:09:08,613
Don't you remember
the Hotel Atlantic City?
193
00:09:08,615 --> 00:09:14,318
Oh, yeah.
What a fleabag.
194
00:09:14,320 --> 00:09:17,588
No, Archie.
It was lovely.
195
00:09:17,590 --> 00:09:20,024
That's where we spent
our honeymoon.
196
00:09:20,026 --> 00:09:21,292
Ah.
Remember?
197
00:09:21,294 --> 00:09:25,530
And I've reserved the same room
for next weekend.
198
00:09:25,532 --> 00:09:27,898
We're going on
our second honeymoon.
199
00:09:27,900 --> 00:09:30,334
Oh, no,
we ain't, Edie.
200
00:09:30,336 --> 00:09:33,003
You reserved that room,
you just unreserve it.
201
00:09:33,005 --> 00:09:35,573
I got money invested
in this ticket.
202
00:09:35,575 --> 00:09:37,275
What, Arch, $7.50?
203
00:09:37,277 --> 00:09:39,777
Ma, how much is that hotel
reservation gonna cost?
204
00:09:39,779 --> 00:09:42,813
Sixty-two dollars.
205
00:09:42,815 --> 00:09:45,449
Sixty-two dollars?
206
00:09:45,451 --> 00:09:47,451
Where did you get
that kind of money?
207
00:09:47,453 --> 00:09:52,156
I saved a little bit every week
from the house money.
208
00:09:52,158 --> 00:09:53,491
Oh, well, Edith,
I'm sorry.
209
00:09:53,493 --> 00:09:55,193
You just better go
get that money back.
210
00:09:55,195 --> 00:09:56,794
Oh, but, Archie,
I can't.
211
00:09:56,796 --> 00:09:59,930
It's what they call
a guaranteed reservation.
212
00:09:59,932 --> 00:10:02,533
But you can get that money back
on that ticket easy.
213
00:10:02,535 --> 00:10:03,934
Sure I can,
because the whole world
214
00:10:03,936 --> 00:10:05,469
wants to go
to the basketball game.
215
00:10:05,471 --> 00:10:09,039
Who the hell wants to
go to that rotten hotel?
216
00:10:09,041 --> 00:10:10,708
Arch, that's the whole point.
217
00:10:10,710 --> 00:10:13,678
You got a ticket worth $7.50
that you can easily get back,
218
00:10:13,680 --> 00:10:16,146
but you've got $62 invested
in the hotel reservation
219
00:10:16,148 --> 00:10:17,848
that you can't get back.
220
00:10:17,850 --> 00:10:20,651
Well, I'll show you
the kind of man I am.
221
00:10:20,653 --> 00:10:24,188
I'll take the loss
and go to the game.
222
00:10:24,190 --> 00:10:26,490
Oh, no, Archie.
223
00:10:26,492 --> 00:10:29,960
You can take your loss,
but I ain't gonna take mine.
224
00:10:29,962 --> 00:10:33,464
You can go to
a basketball game any day,
225
00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:37,702
but your 25th anniversary
comes once in a lifetime.
226
00:10:37,704 --> 00:10:41,639
We're going to
Atlantic City.
227
00:11:01,426 --> 00:11:04,995
All right, Meathead.
228
00:11:04,997 --> 00:11:08,466
Looks like you're going
to a basketball game.
229
00:11:08,468 --> 00:11:12,536
And me-- Hm-hm.
230
00:11:12,538 --> 00:11:15,239
I guess I'm going on
a second honeymoon with Edie.
231
00:11:15,241 --> 00:11:17,841
Oh, Archie!
232
00:11:17,843 --> 00:11:19,810
Thank you.
233
00:11:31,857 --> 00:11:33,157
Here they come, Michael.
Get the rice.
234
00:11:33,159 --> 00:11:34,892
Yeah, yeah.
Here you are, here you are.
235
00:11:34,894 --> 00:11:36,327
[BOTH SINGING WEDDING MARCH]
236
00:11:36,329 --> 00:11:38,228
♪ Daaa, da-da-da ♪
237
00:11:38,230 --> 00:11:40,230
♪ Daaa da-da-da ♪
238
00:11:40,232 --> 00:11:41,265
[LAUGHING]
239
00:11:44,135 --> 00:11:46,737
All right!
Enough of that!
240
00:11:46,739 --> 00:11:49,774
Cut it out!
I said cut it out.
241
00:11:49,776 --> 00:11:51,442
Come on, Arch!
Cut it out!
242
00:11:51,444 --> 00:11:54,312
It's a fertility rite to make
sure you have lots of children.
243
00:11:54,314 --> 00:11:56,647
Oh, shut up, will you?
244
00:11:56,649 --> 00:11:58,683
You're supposed to do that
outside of a church,
245
00:11:58,685 --> 00:12:00,584
not in the middle of the house.
246
00:12:00,586 --> 00:12:02,052
MICHAEL: Why?
247
00:12:02,054 --> 00:12:03,954
It gets all over the floor,
that's why.
248
00:12:03,956 --> 00:12:07,325
Don't worry, Daddy,
we can clean it up in a hurry.
249
00:12:07,327 --> 00:12:09,159
It's Minute Rice.
250
00:12:10,562 --> 00:12:13,030
Come on, Edie, come on.
Pick up your suitcase.
251
00:12:13,032 --> 00:12:14,632
Oh.
252
00:12:14,634 --> 00:12:16,367
So long, Arch.
Goodbye.
253
00:12:16,369 --> 00:12:18,369
Have a nice honeymoon.
So long, Ma.
254
00:12:18,371 --> 00:12:20,438
Have a good time.
255
00:12:24,843 --> 00:12:26,977
You know, I don't know
why anybody would want
256
00:12:26,979 --> 00:12:29,279
to go to Atlantic City
this time of year.
257
00:12:29,281 --> 00:12:32,049
Honey, it's not where you go,
it's who you go with.
258
00:12:32,051 --> 00:12:34,852
Poor Ma. That's two
strikes against her.
259
00:12:36,221 --> 00:12:39,523
Here we are, folks.
Come right on in.
260
00:12:39,525 --> 00:12:41,058
Archie!
261
00:12:41,060 --> 00:12:43,093
The first time
we were here,
262
00:12:43,095 --> 00:12:47,365
you carried me
across the threshold.
263
00:12:52,103 --> 00:12:54,672
Get in here.
264
00:12:56,307 --> 00:13:01,545
Oh, my! It's even prettier
than last time.
265
00:13:01,547 --> 00:13:02,946
Last time?
266
00:13:02,948 --> 00:13:05,716
Yeah, we was here
25 years ago.
267
00:13:05,718 --> 00:13:08,018
Ah, it's nice to have
steady customers.
268
00:13:08,020 --> 00:13:10,821
Here's your key, sir.
269
00:13:10,823 --> 00:13:11,955
If you need anything,
270
00:13:11,957 --> 00:13:13,924
just pick up the phone
and ask for Albert.
271
00:13:13,926 --> 00:13:15,959
I hope you have
a very pleasant stay.
272
00:13:15,961 --> 00:13:17,160
Yeah, thank you.
Good night.
273
00:13:17,162 --> 00:13:18,763
Let me take care of--
Oh, no, sir.
274
00:13:18,765 --> 00:13:21,164
Our customers usually take care
of us at checkout time.
275
00:13:21,166 --> 00:13:22,466
Oh, yeah.
Good night.
276
00:13:22,468 --> 00:13:25,903
Yeah, checkout time.
277
00:13:25,905 --> 00:13:28,305
It'll probably cost me more.
278
00:13:29,508 --> 00:13:32,276
Well, I gotta hand it
to you, Edie.
279
00:13:32,278 --> 00:13:35,012
The hotel certainly has
come up in the world.
280
00:13:35,014 --> 00:13:36,514
Oh, yes!
281
00:13:36,516 --> 00:13:39,950
Been all redecorated
and everything.
282
00:13:39,952 --> 00:13:42,887
Well, I wasn't talking about
the redecoration.
283
00:13:42,889 --> 00:13:44,855
I was talking about the help,
you know?
284
00:13:44,857 --> 00:13:48,959
Notice all the high-tone
coloreds here?
285
00:13:48,961 --> 00:13:52,129
That's what it takes
for service.
286
00:13:52,131 --> 00:13:55,132
You know, that's what
killed the railroads.
287
00:13:57,602 --> 00:14:01,772
They run out of all them
high-tone coloreds.
288
00:14:01,774 --> 00:14:05,943
And after that, you couldn't
get a decent pancake no more.
289
00:14:05,945 --> 00:14:11,482
I hope they think
we're high-tone whites.
290
00:14:13,151 --> 00:14:17,755
Well, Archie!
291
00:14:20,158 --> 00:14:22,125
Well, what?
292
00:14:22,127 --> 00:14:26,296
I can't get over it!
We're really here.
293
00:14:26,298 --> 00:14:28,799
Being as here is where
we was headed, Edith.
294
00:14:28,801 --> 00:14:31,134
I don't see no miracle there.
295
00:14:31,136 --> 00:14:34,271
What do you wanna do first?
296
00:14:34,273 --> 00:14:35,405
Oh, look at this.
297
00:14:35,407 --> 00:14:37,908
The Three Stooges
are on The Late Show.
298
00:14:41,412 --> 00:14:43,280
Oh!
299
00:14:44,483 --> 00:14:46,216
Oh, no!
300
00:14:46,218 --> 00:14:47,551
Now, take it easy.
301
00:14:47,553 --> 00:14:50,220
You don't like that,
we watch Johnny Carson.
302
00:14:50,222 --> 00:14:53,958
Archie, we can watch TV
at home.
303
00:14:53,960 --> 00:14:55,893
We're on our honeymoon!
304
00:14:55,895 --> 00:14:58,061
Oh, now, listen.
Now, listen. Hey.
305
00:14:58,063 --> 00:15:01,565
Take it easy
with that stuff, huh?
306
00:15:01,567 --> 00:15:02,700
Come on, will you?
307
00:15:02,702 --> 00:15:04,802
A honeymoon is for kids, Edie.
308
00:15:04,804 --> 00:15:07,671
It's not for
older people like you.
309
00:15:12,110 --> 00:15:15,880
Archie, for your information,
310
00:15:15,882 --> 00:15:18,582
I'm at the prime of my life
311
00:15:18,584 --> 00:15:23,353
and at the height
of my sexual attractiveness.
312
00:15:32,797 --> 00:15:34,565
I can't believe this.
313
00:15:35,834 --> 00:15:37,568
Well, I didn't either
314
00:15:37,570 --> 00:15:42,606
until I read it
in Cosmopolitan magazine.
315
00:15:44,308 --> 00:15:46,376
Don't believe everything
you read, huh?
316
00:15:46,378 --> 00:15:48,345
No, Archie!
317
00:15:48,347 --> 00:15:52,049
Why don't we do what we did
on our first honeymoon?
318
00:15:53,985 --> 00:15:57,421
What do you expect me to be?
Like the light switch?
319
00:16:05,263 --> 00:16:07,264
Don't you remember?
320
00:16:07,266 --> 00:16:10,734
We sat by the window
and listened to the ocean
321
00:16:10,736 --> 00:16:15,639
and talked about our future and
all the things we was gonna do.
322
00:16:15,641 --> 00:16:18,308
I know, but we done
all them things, Edith.
323
00:16:18,310 --> 00:16:19,977
What's left to talk about?
324
00:16:19,979 --> 00:16:23,647
Well, if we done them,
then they're memories,
325
00:16:23,649 --> 00:16:26,516
and they're even nicer
to talk about.
326
00:16:26,518 --> 00:16:28,786
Come on and sit down
with me.
327
00:16:28,788 --> 00:16:30,721
Don't push me around
like a broom!
328
00:16:30,723 --> 00:16:32,422
Ooh!
329
00:16:32,424 --> 00:16:35,358
Wait a minute.
330
00:16:35,360 --> 00:16:38,729
Oh, look, Archie!
331
00:16:38,731 --> 00:16:42,766
It's still there!
The Atlantic Ocean!
332
00:16:52,911 --> 00:16:54,812
Oh, yes.
333
00:16:58,650 --> 00:17:00,350
Well, I hope you can
remember something.
334
00:17:00,352 --> 00:17:02,753
I can't think of nothing.
335
00:17:02,755 --> 00:17:06,090
I was just remembering
336
00:17:06,092 --> 00:17:11,695
how funny I felt the first time
we was alone together
337
00:17:11,697 --> 00:17:13,831
in this room.
338
00:17:13,833 --> 00:17:16,634
Well, it's only
natural, Edie.
339
00:17:16,636 --> 00:17:18,435
A young girl
on her wedding night
340
00:17:18,437 --> 00:17:20,704
is bound to be
a little scared, nervous.
341
00:17:20,706 --> 00:17:23,173
I wasn't scared.
342
00:17:23,175 --> 00:17:27,177
No, that was
because of me.
343
00:17:27,179 --> 00:17:29,446
Because I was kind and, uh--
344
00:17:29,448 --> 00:17:31,048
What do you call it?
Considerate.
345
00:17:32,617 --> 00:17:34,284
And sick.
346
00:17:39,390 --> 00:17:44,427
Don't you remember? You had
a terrible upset stomach.
347
00:17:44,429 --> 00:17:46,363
Well I always get
an upset stomach
348
00:17:46,365 --> 00:17:48,165
when I take a bus to Jersey.
349
00:17:56,607 --> 00:17:58,241
Archie,
350
00:17:58,243 --> 00:18:01,411
have you been happy
with me?
351
00:18:02,981 --> 00:18:07,017
Well, certainly I've been happy
with you, Edith. Jeez.
352
00:18:09,988 --> 00:18:14,391
Of course, it took
a little getting used to.
353
00:18:15,994 --> 00:18:18,595
I had to tell you a lot of
little things, you remember?
354
00:18:18,597 --> 00:18:20,998
Oh, yeah. I know.
355
00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:27,404
Like, for instance, not to shake
a beer can like tomato juice.
356
00:18:30,108 --> 00:18:31,942
In the first three days
of our marriage,
357
00:18:31,944 --> 00:18:34,578
I was drenched
to the waist.
358
00:18:40,752 --> 00:18:45,155
What about you, Edith?
Have you been happy with me?
359
00:18:45,157 --> 00:18:47,958
Oh, yeah, Archie.
360
00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:50,260
Yeah?
361
00:18:51,462 --> 00:18:53,630
You mean, no complaints
or nothing?
362
00:18:53,632 --> 00:18:56,800
Oh, no. Nothing.
363
00:18:56,802 --> 00:18:58,802
Come on, now, Edith.
364
00:18:58,804 --> 00:19:01,705
I know I'm pretty good
but nobody's perfect.
365
00:19:03,541 --> 00:19:07,310
Oh, that's right.
Everybody has some faults.
366
00:19:07,312 --> 00:19:08,846
Yes.
367
00:19:08,848 --> 00:19:11,681
What faults?
368
00:19:12,951 --> 00:19:16,887
Mmm, nothing. Nothing. Just...
369
00:19:16,889 --> 00:19:19,289
Come on! What? What?
370
00:19:19,291 --> 00:19:24,294
Well, like right now, you've got
kind of a quick temper.
371
00:19:24,296 --> 00:19:25,929
But that ain't my fault.
372
00:19:25,931 --> 00:19:27,998
World War II
done that to me!
373
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:31,568
But you're a good husband
and a good father.
374
00:19:31,570 --> 00:19:33,503
Remember when Gloria
had the measles
375
00:19:33,505 --> 00:19:35,839
and she had that high fever?
376
00:19:35,841 --> 00:19:39,576
You came home and sat up
with her all night long.
377
00:19:39,578 --> 00:19:42,179
You didn't get any sleep
for two days.
378
00:19:42,181 --> 00:19:43,180
ARCHIE:
Yeah.
379
00:19:43,182 --> 00:19:45,082
And then when the fever broke,
380
00:19:45,084 --> 00:19:49,086
I remember we went down in
the kitchen for a cup of coffee.
381
00:19:49,088 --> 00:19:51,621
The look on your face!
382
00:19:51,623 --> 00:19:56,026
I ain't never seen you happier
in my life.
383
00:19:56,028 --> 00:19:58,628
Well, that's probably
because it was the first time
384
00:19:58,630 --> 00:20:01,064
you gave me
a good cup of coffee.
385
00:20:02,366 --> 00:20:04,101
Archie.
386
00:20:04,103 --> 00:20:06,303
Ooh, my, look
at the time.
387
00:20:06,305 --> 00:20:10,274
It's 1:00.
Let's go to bed, Archie.
388
00:20:10,276 --> 00:20:13,877
I want everything
to be just the same
389
00:20:13,879 --> 00:20:17,047
as it was on our
first honeymoon.
390
00:20:17,049 --> 00:20:21,618
I'll be right back!
Alrighty.
391
00:20:21,620 --> 00:20:22,820
[KNOCK AT DOOR]
392
00:20:22,822 --> 00:20:24,621
Who's that?
ALBERT: Albert, sir.
393
00:20:24,623 --> 00:20:26,890
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Albert.
394
00:20:26,892 --> 00:20:30,560
I'm opening the door
for you, Albert.
395
00:20:31,830 --> 00:20:33,096
Hey, what's all this?
396
00:20:33,098 --> 00:20:34,832
The basket of fruit
397
00:20:34,834 --> 00:20:37,534
is compliments of
Mr. Stephens, the manager.
398
00:20:37,536 --> 00:20:38,936
And the bottle of
champagne was ordered
399
00:20:38,938 --> 00:20:40,170
to be delivered
to your room.
400
00:20:40,172 --> 00:20:42,239
Oh, yeah?
And what about you?
401
00:20:42,241 --> 00:20:44,141
Well, there's a card
on the bottle, sir.
402
00:20:44,143 --> 00:20:45,175
Oh.
403
00:20:45,177 --> 00:20:46,676
Good night.
Yeah, good night.
404
00:20:46,678 --> 00:20:48,678
Wait a minute.
Let me take care of you.
405
00:20:48,680 --> 00:20:50,747
Oh, no, no, no.
Checkout time.
406
00:20:54,886 --> 00:20:59,122
Got a feeling Albert's going
to cost me an arm and a leg.
407
00:21:01,059 --> 00:21:04,061
Let's see what the card
says here.
408
00:21:05,796 --> 00:21:07,697
"To the happy couple.
409
00:21:07,699 --> 00:21:10,868
"We hope this adds a little
sparkle to your honeymoon.
410
00:21:10,870 --> 00:21:14,704
Love, Mike and Gloria."
411
00:21:14,706 --> 00:21:18,208
I see the meathead
puts his name first.
412
00:21:20,478 --> 00:21:25,148
And I bet it was Gloria's idea.
413
00:21:25,150 --> 00:21:29,652
So what have we got here?
New York champagne.
414
00:21:29,654 --> 00:21:30,787
Hmm.
415
00:21:30,789 --> 00:21:33,857
Well, that's a phony label.
416
00:21:35,726 --> 00:21:38,528
They don't grow raisins
in New York.
417
00:21:43,434 --> 00:21:45,035
There.
418
00:21:45,037 --> 00:21:47,737
Here we are. Good old bubbles.
419
00:21:47,739 --> 00:21:49,339
[POPS]
420
00:21:49,341 --> 00:21:50,707
EDITH:
Oh!
421
00:21:50,709 --> 00:21:52,675
Archie!
422
00:21:52,677 --> 00:21:54,978
It's champagne!
423
00:22:10,494 --> 00:22:14,597
Come on out, Edie.
It's a surprise out here!
424
00:22:14,599 --> 00:22:16,033
EDITH:
What surprise?
425
00:22:16,035 --> 00:22:19,102
The kids! The kids. They sent
us a bottle of champagne.
426
00:22:19,104 --> 00:22:21,305
EDITH:
Oh, ain't that sweet?
427
00:22:21,307 --> 00:22:23,407
Well, come on out, now,
and get some.
428
00:22:23,409 --> 00:22:24,707
EDITH:
I'm coming!
429
00:22:27,878 --> 00:22:29,612
[ARCHIE CLEARS THROAT]
430
00:22:29,614 --> 00:22:32,416
Here I am.
431
00:22:39,123 --> 00:22:41,224
Gee, Edie.
432
00:22:41,226 --> 00:22:43,193
You know, you look
kind of pretty standing there.
433
00:22:44,762 --> 00:22:46,830
Is that the same dress
you was wearing
434
00:22:46,832 --> 00:22:49,699
when I first seen you
come through that bathroom door?
435
00:22:49,701 --> 00:22:54,338
Oh, no, Archie, I just got this
at Bloomingdale's.
436
00:22:54,340 --> 00:22:57,441
Gee, that's funny.
437
00:22:57,443 --> 00:23:01,111
You look just like you did
25 years ago.
438
00:23:01,113 --> 00:23:04,514
Thank you, Archie!
439
00:23:05,916 --> 00:23:07,784
Come on. Come on!
440
00:23:07,786 --> 00:23:09,987
Let's kill this bottle
of champagne, hey?
441
00:23:09,989 --> 00:23:11,388
Uh-huh.
Wait!
442
00:23:11,390 --> 00:23:13,957
I'm going to
make a toast.
443
00:23:13,959 --> 00:23:20,430
Thank you for a wonderful
25 years.
444
00:23:20,432 --> 00:23:23,633
Wow, Edith.
Thank you too.
445
00:23:23,635 --> 00:23:26,936
After all, I couldn't have
did it without you.
446
00:23:32,377 --> 00:23:33,977
[BURPS]
447
00:23:33,979 --> 00:23:37,747
Come on!
Give me that. Uh-uh.
448
00:23:37,749 --> 00:23:40,583
Ahh.
449
00:23:40,585 --> 00:23:43,020
Well, Edith.
450
00:23:43,022 --> 00:23:45,288
Well, what?
451
00:23:49,260 --> 00:23:51,528
Well, this.
452
00:24:04,008 --> 00:24:06,609
Edith, come on, I've pushed
the button for the elevator.
453
00:24:06,611 --> 00:24:08,111
Yeah, I'm ready.
454
00:24:08,113 --> 00:24:10,514
We've got 10 minutes for the
bus. We're going to be late.
455
00:24:10,516 --> 00:24:12,082
Can I help you
with anything, sir?
456
00:24:12,084 --> 00:24:14,784
Oh, that's all right, Albert.
I think I can handle it.
457
00:24:14,786 --> 00:24:18,121
Oh, I'll handle it.
It's checkout time.
458
00:24:22,626 --> 00:24:24,794
I knew this was going
to cost me, Edith.
459
00:24:24,796 --> 00:24:30,467
Look, all I got is paper.
Have you got three quarters?
460
00:24:30,469 --> 00:24:33,070
Hurry up.
461
00:24:50,654 --> 00:24:53,490
[♪]
462
00:24:53,492 --> 00:24:57,494
ANNOUNCER:
All in the Family was recordedon tape before a live audience.
463
00:24:57,544 --> 00:25:02,094
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
33420
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.