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♪ Thank you for being a friend
2
00:00:05,806 --> 00:00:09,786
♪ Traveled down the
road and back again
3
00:00:09,810 --> 00:00:11,254
♪ Your heart is true
4
00:00:11,278 --> 00:00:16,793
♪ You're a pal and a confidante
5
00:00:16,817 --> 00:00:20,263
♪ And if you threw a party
6
00:00:20,287 --> 00:00:24,668
♪ Invited everyone you knew
7
00:00:24,692 --> 00:00:29,039
♪ You would see the
biggest gift would be from me
8
00:00:29,063 --> 00:00:31,675
♪ And the card
attached would say,
9
00:00:31,699 --> 00:00:36,535
♪ "Thank you for
being a friend" ♪
10
00:00:50,350 --> 00:00:54,631
♪ Kentucky babe, sandman am
a-comin' to this little babe of mine
11
00:00:54,655 --> 00:00:57,467
♪ Sleep, Kentucky babe
12
00:00:57,491 --> 00:01:00,470
♪ Silvery moon am shining
in the heaven up above
13
00:01:00,494 --> 00:01:03,839
♪ Bobolink am pining
for his little lady love
14
00:01:03,863 --> 00:01:06,909
♪ You is mighty lucky,
babe of old Kentucky
15
00:01:06,933 --> 00:01:10,480
♪ Close your eyes and sleep
16
00:01:10,504 --> 00:01:14,651
♪ Fly away, fly away...
17
00:01:14,675 --> 00:01:18,221
We're out of pepperoni! I'm
starving, and we're out of pepperoni!
18
00:01:18,245 --> 00:01:19,556
I'm sorry, Sophia honey.
19
00:01:19,580 --> 00:01:21,924
Would you like some celery
stuffed with cottage cheese?
20
00:01:21,948 --> 00:01:24,916
I can't eat cottage
cheese. It repeats on me.
21
00:01:26,320 --> 00:01:30,233
Hello, hello. Hi, Blanche.
How are you, sweet Mother?
22
00:01:30,257 --> 00:01:34,970
We're out of pepperoni.
Did you call Dan Rather?
23
00:01:34,994 --> 00:01:37,373
I'm starving. I
defrosted some chicken.
24
00:01:37,397 --> 00:01:38,575
We'll eat in half an hour.
25
00:01:38,599 --> 00:01:41,277
I can't eat chicken.
It repeats on me.
26
00:01:41,301 --> 00:01:43,513
Look, Ma, you don't
have to make excuses.
27
00:01:43,537 --> 00:01:44,614
If you don't want chicken,
28
00:01:44,638 --> 00:01:45,815
just say, "I don't want chicken.
29
00:01:45,839 --> 00:01:47,049
I don't want chicken.
30
00:01:47,073 --> 00:01:48,050
Good.
31
00:01:48,074 --> 00:01:49,641
It repeats on me.
32
00:01:50,877 --> 00:01:52,888
I want pepperoni.
33
00:01:52,912 --> 00:01:55,391
Blanche, Blanche, would
you like some broiled chicken?
34
00:01:55,415 --> 00:01:57,993
Oh, no, thank you. I'm
having a raw vegetable plate.
35
00:01:58,017 --> 00:02:00,697
You probably haven't noticed
it, but I've put on three pounds.
36
00:02:00,721 --> 00:02:03,666
On each side.
37
00:02:03,690 --> 00:02:06,969
I used to have a waist
just like Scarlett O'Hara.
38
00:02:06,993 --> 00:02:09,539
Well, you know that girl
had an 18-inch waistline.
39
00:02:09,563 --> 00:02:13,076
Blanche, that girl and
her waistline were fiction.
40
00:02:13,100 --> 00:02:18,081
It's terrible, just
terrible. I am so upset!
41
00:02:18,105 --> 00:02:21,217
Rose, Rose. Honey, sit down.
42
00:02:21,241 --> 00:02:23,019
Sweetheart, tell
us all about it.
43
00:02:23,043 --> 00:02:25,488
Ma, would you get
Rose some water?
44
00:02:25,512 --> 00:02:28,658
What is she gonna do with water?
45
00:02:28,682 --> 00:02:31,961
Has water ever made you feel
better when you were upset?
46
00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:36,821
Have you ever heard anyone
say, "Thank God, the water's here!"
47
00:02:38,092 --> 00:02:41,826
Call me when dinner is ready.
48
00:02:43,730 --> 00:02:47,343
I'm fine, don't worry about
me. It's all those other people.
49
00:02:47,367 --> 00:02:49,946
Was there some kind of
accident? No, don't tell me.
50
00:02:49,970 --> 00:02:51,114
If I get upset, I'll eat!
51
00:02:51,138 --> 00:02:52,248
What happened, Rose?
52
00:02:52,272 --> 00:02:54,350
They closed the center.
53
00:02:54,374 --> 00:02:56,286
Not your Grief
Counseling Center?
54
00:02:56,310 --> 00:02:59,622
No, the Kennedy Space Center.
55
00:02:59,646 --> 00:03:02,658
She wanted to be the
first Lutheran on the moon.
56
00:03:02,682 --> 00:03:04,660
Rose, you're out of a job!
57
00:03:04,684 --> 00:03:06,529
Well, I can't worry
about that now.
58
00:03:06,553 --> 00:03:08,198
Well, sure you can, honey.
59
00:03:08,222 --> 00:03:11,367
I'll help you - food,
clothing, shelter.
60
00:03:11,391 --> 00:03:13,836
Oh come on, it's
not that serious.
61
00:03:13,860 --> 00:03:16,473
Yes, it could be. Rose, you
and I are in the same boat.
62
00:03:16,497 --> 00:03:17,873
If we miss a couple
of paychecks,
63
00:03:17,897 --> 00:03:19,576
we are in big trouble.
64
00:03:19,600 --> 00:03:21,911
Thank God I had the
foresight to marry money.
65
00:03:21,935 --> 00:03:25,181
Tramp.
66
00:03:25,205 --> 00:03:28,050
Dorothy, my main
concern is making sure
67
00:03:28,074 --> 00:03:32,054
those miserable people
can find other sources of help.
68
00:03:32,078 --> 00:03:33,756
Then I'll get a job.
69
00:03:33,780 --> 00:03:37,994
I'm dependable,
friendly, loyal, eager.
70
00:03:38,018 --> 00:03:41,731
That's great. If she learns to
catch a Frisbee in her teeth,
71
00:03:41,755 --> 00:03:43,766
she can get work
as a golden retriever.
72
00:03:43,790 --> 00:03:46,158
Oh!
73
00:04:10,617 --> 00:04:13,496
Hello.
74
00:04:13,520 --> 00:04:15,853
Hello.
75
00:04:19,893 --> 00:04:22,672
I'm Dorothy. Milton.
76
00:04:22,696 --> 00:04:25,175
Oh, pleased to meet
you, Milton. Likewise.
77
00:04:25,199 --> 00:04:26,909
I live here.
78
00:04:26,933 --> 00:04:28,544
Oh.
79
00:04:28,568 --> 00:04:31,014
You don't.
80
00:04:31,038 --> 00:04:33,582
I live over on Dorado. Ah.
81
00:04:33,606 --> 00:04:38,087
It's about a 20-minute walk...
but I usually take the bus.
82
00:04:38,111 --> 00:04:41,891
Are you waiting for one now?
83
00:04:41,915 --> 00:04:46,696
No, I'm learning to get in
touch with my emotions.
84
00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:48,698
Tell me, will it take long?
85
00:04:48,722 --> 00:04:52,035
You know, you're reading
my Newsweek. Oh, I'm sorry.
86
00:04:52,059 --> 00:04:54,570
Oh, Dorothy, I
see you met Milton.
87
00:04:54,594 --> 00:04:57,040
Oh, yes. We were
just getting acquainted.
88
00:04:57,064 --> 00:04:59,064
Dump him, Rose. He's driftwood.
89
00:05:00,934 --> 00:05:05,915
Oh, no, Dorothy.
Milton's from the center.
90
00:05:05,939 --> 00:05:07,751
His partner ran
off with his wife
91
00:05:07,775 --> 00:05:09,085
and all the money
from the business.
92
00:05:09,109 --> 00:05:14,090
Oh, Milton, I'm sorry.
Keep the Newsweek.
93
00:05:14,114 --> 00:05:16,660
Now, here's the address of
a private counseling service,
94
00:05:16,684 --> 00:05:18,995
and in the meantime, my
number's down there at the bottom.
95
00:05:19,019 --> 00:05:22,766
Now, don't hesitate to
call anytime, day or night.
96
00:05:22,790 --> 00:05:25,568
Day or night?
97
00:05:25,592 --> 00:05:28,070
Thanks again, Rose. Oh,
you're welcome, Milton.
98
00:05:28,094 --> 00:05:30,706
You let me know how it
works out. I certainly will.
99
00:05:30,730 --> 00:05:35,811
And no more
tears. All right. Bye.
100
00:05:35,835 --> 00:05:40,617
He's such a royal
pain in the butt...
101
00:05:40,641 --> 00:05:42,685
but it's all part of my job.
102
00:05:42,709 --> 00:05:45,054
You don't have a job, remember?
103
00:05:45,078 --> 00:05:46,389
I haven't forgotten, Dorothy.
104
00:05:46,413 --> 00:05:48,258
I've just been too
busy to start looking.
105
00:05:48,282 --> 00:05:51,060
You haven't even
started looking?
106
00:05:51,084 --> 00:05:53,863
Don't worry, will
you? I will get a job.
107
00:05:53,887 --> 00:05:57,267
There's always a job for people
who aren't afraid of hard work.
108
00:05:57,291 --> 00:05:58,501
That's what my
father used to say.
109
00:05:58,525 --> 00:06:02,004
He was talking about
milking cows in Minnesota!
110
00:06:02,028 --> 00:06:04,240
Here, phone messages.
111
00:06:04,264 --> 00:06:05,441
Oh, thank you, Sophia.
112
00:06:05,465 --> 00:06:08,378
If you have to go out
tomorrow, ask those crybabies
113
00:06:08,402 --> 00:06:10,935
not to call during The
Young and the Restless.
114
00:06:14,274 --> 00:06:16,852
Mr. Viner's depressed.
115
00:06:16,876 --> 00:06:19,855
Mrs. Gibson's despondent.
116
00:06:19,879 --> 00:06:22,780
Mr. Duvalier's been deported.
117
00:06:25,085 --> 00:06:27,730
Why, oh, why can't
grief take a holiday?
118
00:06:27,754 --> 00:06:29,932
Oh, it does, Rose, it does.
119
00:06:29,956 --> 00:06:33,058
Eventually, it comes to
Miami, like everyone else.
120
00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:38,107
Oh, my God. I don't believe it!
121
00:06:38,131 --> 00:06:41,343
Barry Glick is in town.
122
00:06:41,367 --> 00:06:44,113
Oh, I haven't seen
him since high school.
123
00:06:44,137 --> 00:06:48,751
Barry Glick! Ma, Ma,
look, look, Barry Glick!
124
00:06:48,775 --> 00:06:53,455
Oh boy, did I have
the hots for him!
125
00:06:53,479 --> 00:06:55,391
He says he wants to
get together next week.
126
00:06:55,415 --> 00:06:56,759
You're gonna see him?
127
00:06:56,783 --> 00:06:59,562
See him? If he's within 50
pounds of where he used to be,
128
00:06:59,586 --> 00:07:01,664
I'm gonna marry him!
129
00:07:01,688 --> 00:07:04,200
Oh, Barry Glick.
130
00:07:04,224 --> 00:07:08,637
Oh, and Mrs. Montez found
her cat. I'll bet she's happy, too.
131
00:07:08,661 --> 00:07:13,131
Not exactly. She found it
under a Jeep Wagoneer.
132
00:07:23,343 --> 00:07:27,045
Rose! Rose!
133
00:07:30,417 --> 00:07:32,784
Rose, will you wake
up? You have a call.
134
00:07:34,288 --> 00:07:37,233
Is it time to milk
the cows, Daddy?
135
00:07:37,257 --> 00:07:39,969
No, kitten. You
have a phone call.
136
00:07:39,993 --> 00:07:42,204
What did you say, Dorothy?
137
00:07:42,228 --> 00:07:44,874
You have a phone call.
138
00:07:44,898 --> 00:07:47,042
It's your friend Milton.
139
00:07:47,066 --> 00:07:49,312
No, I can't believe
he's calling at this hour!
140
00:07:49,336 --> 00:07:51,180
Well, you told him
to call day or night.
141
00:07:51,204 --> 00:07:53,516
I didn't mean it.
It's an expression,
142
00:07:53,540 --> 00:07:55,485
like, "laugh and the
world laughs with you."
143
00:07:55,509 --> 00:07:58,755
Well, the whole world
doesn't really laugh.
144
00:07:58,779 --> 00:08:01,991
That's because they're too busy
calling here in the middle of the night.
145
00:08:02,015 --> 00:08:03,726
Good night, Rose!
146
00:08:06,453 --> 00:08:09,465
I hate phone calls in
the middle of the night.
147
00:08:09,489 --> 00:08:11,601
Now I'll never
get back to sleep.
148
00:08:11,625 --> 00:08:14,492
I'm as jumpy as a
virgin at a prison rodeo.
149
00:08:19,599 --> 00:08:22,734
Boy, that's... pretty jumpy.
150
00:08:23,904 --> 00:08:26,315
Well, didn't the
phone scare you?
151
00:08:26,339 --> 00:08:27,750
Well, of course it did.
152
00:08:27,774 --> 00:08:31,287
One of those times I really
miss having a man around.
153
00:08:31,311 --> 00:08:32,922
They're so good at
answering the phone
154
00:08:32,946 --> 00:08:34,991
in the middle of the night.
155
00:08:35,015 --> 00:08:38,061
That's not all they're good at.
156
00:08:38,085 --> 00:08:41,786
And when they're really good,
you don't even hear the phone.
157
00:08:43,056 --> 00:08:46,936
Ma, why are you
sitting here in the dark?
158
00:08:46,960 --> 00:08:49,627
Why not? I've seen
the living room before.
159
00:08:50,964 --> 00:08:52,909
Look, look. I've
got to get some rest.
160
00:08:52,933 --> 00:08:56,879
Tomorrow I am seeing Barry
Glick for the first time in 35 years.
161
00:08:56,903 --> 00:09:02,085
If I don't get at least six hours'
sleep, I look like Buddy Ebsen!
162
00:09:02,109 --> 00:09:04,687
Now that you mention
it... Shut up, Blanche.
163
00:09:04,711 --> 00:09:06,922
Oh, I know it. You're
right. It's just terrible.
164
00:09:06,946 --> 00:09:09,125
If I get up in the
middle of the night, I eat.
165
00:09:09,149 --> 00:09:11,127
Wait a minute, you
know something?
166
00:09:11,151 --> 00:09:12,861
We're being selfish.
167
00:09:12,885 --> 00:09:16,765
I mean, Rose's problem is
more important than my date.
168
00:09:16,789 --> 00:09:18,535
Or my losing two pounds.
169
00:09:18,559 --> 00:09:19,657
Three pounds.
170
00:09:21,528 --> 00:09:23,339
She has to face reality.
171
00:09:23,363 --> 00:09:26,409
I am. I already lost one pound!
172
00:09:26,433 --> 00:09:29,612
In your dreams.
173
00:09:29,636 --> 00:09:33,149
I'm talking about Rose.
She has to find a job.
174
00:09:33,173 --> 00:09:35,385
She's been out of
work for over a week.
175
00:09:35,409 --> 00:09:38,922
I am really sorry about this,
girls. It won't happen again.
176
00:09:38,946 --> 00:09:40,023
Now come on. We
can all go back...
177
00:09:40,047 --> 00:09:41,357
No, no, no, wait.
Rose, sit down.
178
00:09:41,381 --> 00:09:44,127
Move over, move
over. Now, listen.
179
00:09:44,151 --> 00:09:47,696
We have something to talk to you
about. We are worried about you.
180
00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:49,832
Now, maybe it's
none of our business,
181
00:09:49,856 --> 00:09:51,367
but all that time that you spend
182
00:09:51,391 --> 00:09:53,803
with those pathetic
wimps from the center,
183
00:09:53,827 --> 00:09:56,139
you should spend
looking for a job.
184
00:09:56,163 --> 00:09:57,706
But those wimps need me.
185
00:09:57,730 --> 00:10:00,543
But Rose, honey, you
have your own problems.
186
00:10:00,567 --> 00:10:02,845
Look. You are 55, unemployed,
187
00:10:02,869 --> 00:10:05,148
your husband is dead,
and you have no training.
188
00:10:05,172 --> 00:10:07,905
Let's face it, Rose. You're
not exactly Mary Lou Retton.
189
00:10:09,543 --> 00:10:13,189
Honey, we know it's not easy,
but you got to get out there and try.
190
00:10:13,213 --> 00:10:14,223
I have tried.
191
00:10:14,247 --> 00:10:16,025
I just haven't told you.
192
00:10:16,049 --> 00:10:18,027
I've had dozens
of job interviews
193
00:10:18,051 --> 00:10:19,462
since the center closed.
194
00:10:19,486 --> 00:10:23,299
No one wants me. I
can't afford not to work.
195
00:10:23,323 --> 00:10:25,934
I need something
to do with my life.
196
00:10:25,958 --> 00:10:29,639
I never think of myself as
old, but everyone else does.
197
00:10:29,663 --> 00:10:34,632
Maybe I am old... old
and useless... and terrified.
198
00:10:52,785 --> 00:10:54,452
Come in.
199
00:10:59,559 --> 00:11:02,404
Oh, Rose.
200
00:11:02,428 --> 00:11:08,844
Rose, honey, now why didn't
you tell us what was going on?
201
00:11:08,868 --> 00:11:11,814
Because you can't
help me find a job.
202
00:11:11,838 --> 00:11:14,717
Because nobody or nothing
can make me young again.
203
00:11:14,741 --> 00:11:18,888
Oh, all right, Rose, so your life
isn't the same as it used to be.
204
00:11:18,912 --> 00:11:22,024
The rules have changed, but
it's happened before, hasn't it?
205
00:11:22,048 --> 00:11:24,348
I mean, what did you
do after Charley died?
206
00:11:25,585 --> 00:11:28,330
Buried him.
207
00:11:28,354 --> 00:11:31,100
I mean, what did
you do the next day
208
00:11:31,124 --> 00:11:33,969
when you had to start
putting your life together?
209
00:11:33,993 --> 00:11:37,807
I couldn't do it. I'd been
a housewife for 32 years.
210
00:11:37,831 --> 00:11:40,042
I totally depended on Charley.
211
00:11:40,066 --> 00:11:42,845
But the point is, eventually
you did what you had to do.
212
00:11:42,869 --> 00:11:44,513
You took care of yourself.
213
00:11:44,537 --> 00:11:46,816
Sweetheart, you're now in
exactly the same position.
214
00:11:46,840 --> 00:11:48,350
Not exactly.
215
00:11:48,374 --> 00:11:52,688
I'm five years older... and
nobody wants me around.
216
00:11:52,712 --> 00:11:55,224
Oh honey, we want you around.
217
00:11:55,248 --> 00:11:57,608
We just can't afford to pay you.
218
00:11:58,351 --> 00:12:00,796
Rose, Rose, look at me.
219
00:12:00,820 --> 00:12:03,833
Rose, listen. You are
feeling sorry for yourself.
220
00:12:03,857 --> 00:12:08,003
Sure, you're five years
older. So am I, so is Blanche.
221
00:12:08,027 --> 00:12:10,106
All right.
222
00:12:10,130 --> 00:12:12,074
You have a few more wrinkles -
223
00:12:12,098 --> 00:12:14,598
so do I, so has Blanche.
224
00:12:17,536 --> 00:12:19,915
All right, you're a little
thicker around the middle.
225
00:12:19,939 --> 00:12:21,806
So is Blanche!
226
00:12:26,212 --> 00:12:28,424
Listen, we are not
going to stand by
227
00:12:28,448 --> 00:12:30,426
and just let you give up.
228
00:12:30,450 --> 00:12:31,694
We're gonna
figure out what it is
229
00:12:31,718 --> 00:12:33,429
you're doing wrong
on these interviews.
230
00:12:33,453 --> 00:12:34,897
We're gonna fix it,
231
00:12:34,921 --> 00:12:36,966
and we're gonna try and get
you some more appointments.
232
00:12:36,990 --> 00:12:39,602
Appointments are the easy part.
233
00:12:39,626 --> 00:12:42,004
I've got one tomorrow.
234
00:12:42,028 --> 00:12:44,240
I'd kill for this job -
235
00:12:44,264 --> 00:12:46,542
hospital administrator -
236
00:12:46,566 --> 00:12:47,910
but I'll never get it.
237
00:12:47,934 --> 00:12:50,045
I'm not qualified. I'm too old.
238
00:12:50,069 --> 00:12:51,547
What time is your appointment?
- 30.
239
00:12:51,571 --> 00:12:53,249
All right, let me
see your resume.
240
00:12:53,273 --> 00:12:55,485
Come on, come on, come on.
241
00:12:55,509 --> 00:12:58,654
OK, now, let's see. Let's see.
242
00:12:58,678 --> 00:13:01,890
"Home ec major at
Rockport Community College,
243
00:13:01,914 --> 00:13:03,926
"six months at St.
Paul's Business School,
244
00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:06,162
"32 years of marriage,
245
00:13:06,186 --> 00:13:08,831
"laid off from your job
at Grief Counseling.
246
00:13:08,855 --> 00:13:11,623
"Hobbies: cheese-making...
247
00:13:18,364 --> 00:13:24,769
"stamp collecting,
and... Viking history"?
248
00:13:26,873 --> 00:13:30,652
Rose, this stinks.
Well, it's the truth.
249
00:13:30,676 --> 00:13:32,854
Honey, sometimes you
have to stretch the truth.
250
00:13:32,878 --> 00:13:34,256
Of course you
do. Now, let's see.
251
00:13:34,280 --> 00:13:36,892
Graduated top of your class.
252
00:13:36,916 --> 00:13:40,462
Intensive postgraduate study.
253
00:13:40,486 --> 00:13:44,466
32 years with the same employer
254
00:13:44,490 --> 00:13:47,702
until you moved to Miami.
255
00:13:47,726 --> 00:13:50,239
Currently seeking work
256
00:13:50,263 --> 00:13:55,177
in the private sector.
257
00:13:55,201 --> 00:13:59,937
Voilà. This is the resume of a
potential hospital administrator.
258
00:14:01,807 --> 00:14:04,786
Well, I don't know if I can
pull it off, but I'm willing to try.
259
00:14:04,810 --> 00:14:07,356
Oh, good. Now we
can get some sleep.
260
00:14:07,380 --> 00:14:09,558
Oh, I can't fall asleep now.
261
00:14:09,582 --> 00:14:12,116
Still at the rodeo, Blanche?
262
00:14:15,254 --> 00:14:18,400
I can't sleep, either. Why don't
I make us all some warm milk?
263
00:14:18,424 --> 00:14:22,438
After I drink milk,
I go right to sleep.
264
00:14:22,462 --> 00:14:26,875
I can think of something else after
which I go right to sleep. Huh, Dorothy?
265
00:14:26,899 --> 00:14:27,899
During.
266
00:14:32,105 --> 00:14:35,084
Girls, we can't drink
plain milk. Why not?
267
00:14:35,108 --> 00:14:37,719
It's disgusting. If we're gonna
have milk, we need cookies.
268
00:14:37,743 --> 00:14:40,489
Hell, if I'm gonna have cookies,
I'm gonna have cheesecake.
269
00:14:40,513 --> 00:14:42,758
Is there cheesecake?
Chocolate cheesecake.
270
00:14:42,782 --> 00:14:45,627
You bought chocolate
cheesecake? Just for an emergency.
271
00:14:45,651 --> 00:14:49,432
What kind of emergency,
nuclear war? Depression.
272
00:14:49,456 --> 00:14:52,601
Oh, you'll never
guess what I found!
273
00:14:52,625 --> 00:14:54,470
Judge Crater.
274
00:14:54,494 --> 00:14:57,973
Cookies and cream
ice cream - my favorite.
275
00:14:57,997 --> 00:14:59,942
Wait a minute.
We're eating dessert.
276
00:14:59,966 --> 00:15:02,278
We can't start with dessert.
If we're gonna have dessert,
277
00:15:02,302 --> 00:15:04,079
we better have
something to begin with.
278
00:15:04,103 --> 00:15:07,616
Sure. You can have some lemon
chicken and smoked ham. It's all prepared.
279
00:15:07,640 --> 00:15:10,452
Oh, let's just start with
appetizers. That's fine.
280
00:15:10,476 --> 00:15:12,821
How about smoked
oysters? Oh, good.
281
00:15:12,845 --> 00:15:17,492
Oh, you'll never
guess what I found!
282
00:15:17,516 --> 00:15:18,727
Jimmy Hoffa.
283
00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:21,496
Pepperoni!
284
00:15:21,520 --> 00:15:24,099
Uh-oh. Don't tell Mom.
285
00:15:24,123 --> 00:15:27,069
That could be an
appetizer. Well, this is good.
286
00:15:27,093 --> 00:15:31,974
This is all food that would
have spoiled. Oh, boy.
287
00:15:31,998 --> 00:15:35,577
I am so glad that my date
with Barry is tomorrow.
288
00:15:35,601 --> 00:15:38,914
The fat won't have
time to show. It won't?
289
00:15:38,938 --> 00:15:41,917
No. It always takes a
few days before it shows.
290
00:15:41,941 --> 00:15:43,986
Where does it go
in the meantime?
291
00:15:44,010 --> 00:15:47,389
To Connecticut! How
do I know where it goes?
292
00:15:47,413 --> 00:15:50,792
With me, the minute it goes
in my mouth, I balloon up.
293
00:15:50,816 --> 00:15:53,262
I can go out to dinner, and
in the middle of the meal,
294
00:15:53,286 --> 00:15:55,497
my pants are cutting
off my circulation so bad,
295
00:15:55,521 --> 00:15:57,632
my feet are turning blue.
296
00:15:57,656 --> 00:16:01,803
Well, I just want to
be svelte for Barry.
297
00:16:01,827 --> 00:16:04,639
Barry Glick is very
important to you.
298
00:16:06,499 --> 00:16:10,912
Barry was the man that
I wanted to be the first.
299
00:16:10,936 --> 00:16:12,348
First where?
300
00:16:12,372 --> 00:16:17,152
On Mars, Rose! My first lover.
301
00:16:17,176 --> 00:16:18,454
Well, so what happened?
302
00:16:18,478 --> 00:16:20,990
Stanley - that's what happened.
303
00:16:21,014 --> 00:16:24,860
Stanley. I went to a
drive-in with Stanley.
304
00:16:24,884 --> 00:16:28,263
He said he was being shipped
off to Korea and would probably die
305
00:16:28,287 --> 00:16:31,400
and it would mean so much.
306
00:16:31,424 --> 00:16:33,957
That was my part
of the war effort.
307
00:16:35,928 --> 00:16:39,308
It took three seconds.
308
00:16:39,332 --> 00:16:42,844
I wasn't sure that we had
done anything, actually...
309
00:16:42,868 --> 00:16:45,780
until nine months later,
when the baby came.
310
00:16:45,804 --> 00:16:48,617
Then I figured out that we had.
311
00:16:48,641 --> 00:16:51,053
You know, that
was my only proof.
312
00:16:51,077 --> 00:16:53,444
I waited till my wedding night.
313
00:16:56,649 --> 00:16:58,693
No!
314
00:16:58,717 --> 00:17:01,596
Yes! And?
315
00:17:01,620 --> 00:17:05,234
And... it was a surprise.
316
00:17:05,258 --> 00:17:08,392
How is that possible?
Another man showed up?
317
00:17:10,096 --> 00:17:16,233
What I mean is... I had
never seen a man before.
318
00:17:22,508 --> 00:17:23,640
A man?
319
00:17:24,810 --> 00:17:28,657
You know... a man.
320
00:17:28,681 --> 00:17:30,259
No!
321
00:17:30,283 --> 00:17:32,127
Yes!
322
00:17:32,151 --> 00:17:37,099
What about your father? You
mean, you never saw your father?
323
00:17:37,123 --> 00:17:41,537
My father? Oh, no! My father?
324
00:17:41,561 --> 00:17:44,540
Oh, my goodness, no! I
would have simply died!
325
00:17:44,564 --> 00:17:47,876
Oh, you don't... Oh, my
God! Easy, easy, easy, Rose.
326
00:17:47,900 --> 00:17:50,679
Calm down, calm
down. Easy! All right!
327
00:17:50,703 --> 00:17:54,649
The only things I ever saw
were the animals on the farm,
328
00:17:54,673 --> 00:17:57,018
you know, the
bulls and the horses.
329
00:17:57,042 --> 00:17:59,776
Tough act to follow.
330
00:18:07,454 --> 00:18:10,299
Actually, that first night
331
00:18:10,323 --> 00:18:16,105
I was kind of, well...
appalled, I guess.
332
00:18:16,129 --> 00:18:18,707
But Charley was very patient.
333
00:18:18,731 --> 00:18:21,610
It was really very nice,
334
00:18:21,634 --> 00:18:26,048
once I understood that that's
what you were supposed to do...
335
00:18:26,072 --> 00:18:28,505
that it wasn't some
colossal joke, you know?
336
00:18:32,312 --> 00:18:36,180
I mean, didn't you think it was a
ridiculous thing to do the first time?
337
00:18:37,283 --> 00:18:40,495
No!
338
00:18:40,519 --> 00:18:43,465
Well, I certainly didn't wait
for my wedding night, honey.
339
00:18:43,489 --> 00:18:47,436
I couldn't. I had these urges.
340
00:18:47,460 --> 00:18:50,505
You know, in the
South, we mature faster.
341
00:18:50,529 --> 00:18:53,764
I think it's the heat.
342
00:18:55,234 --> 00:18:57,134
I think it's the gin.
343
00:18:58,471 --> 00:19:01,550
Anyhow, my first was Billy.
344
00:19:01,574 --> 00:19:05,421
Oh, I remember it so well,
just like it was yesterday.
345
00:19:05,445 --> 00:19:07,889
That night under
the dogwood trees,
346
00:19:07,913 --> 00:19:10,592
the air thick with perfume,
347
00:19:10,616 --> 00:19:16,065
and me with Billy... or Bobby.
348
00:19:16,089 --> 00:19:19,368
Yeah, Bobby.
Yeah, it was Bobby...
349
00:19:19,392 --> 00:19:21,971
or was it Ben?
350
00:19:21,995 --> 00:19:25,896
Oh, who knows? Anyway,
it started with a "B."
351
00:19:28,634 --> 00:19:35,206
That first time...
did you have...?
352
00:19:40,179 --> 00:19:42,224
Are you serious?
353
00:19:42,248 --> 00:19:46,050
Why, many times that first
time. Many, many times!
354
00:19:47,353 --> 00:19:49,898
You did? You didn't?
355
00:19:49,922 --> 00:19:52,067
No!
356
00:19:52,091 --> 00:19:56,038
Oh, it was nice - being
near Charley was nice,
357
00:19:56,062 --> 00:20:00,597
but it was five years before I knew what
made your eyes go back in your head.
358
00:20:05,704 --> 00:20:10,619
Dorothy, did you have...?
359
00:20:10,643 --> 00:20:15,513
How could I? I mean, it always seemed
to happen before I was in the room.
360
00:20:18,584 --> 00:20:22,531
Look what we've eaten! Oh,
and I can't sleep on a full stomach.
361
00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:24,766
Look at what time it is.
Would you like some coffee?
362
00:20:24,790 --> 00:20:27,503
Sure. How 'bout some
Danish? It's almost breakfast.
363
00:20:27,527 --> 00:20:29,438
Hey, want some eggs? Sure!
364
00:20:29,462 --> 00:20:31,340
Do we have any bacon? Yeah.
365
00:20:31,364 --> 00:20:33,909
Scramble me a couple,
but... Scramble soft!
366
00:20:40,473 --> 00:20:43,485
You're a wonderful
woman, Blanche.
367
00:20:43,509 --> 00:20:44,820
No offense to Rose,
368
00:20:44,844 --> 00:20:46,922
but I'm glad she wasn't
here when I dropped by today.
369
00:20:46,946 --> 00:20:49,658
Why, Milton, what
a sweet thing to say.
370
00:20:49,682 --> 00:20:52,794
That must be why I
date more than she does.
371
00:20:52,818 --> 00:20:55,363
And I meant what I said
about that diet of yours.
372
00:20:55,387 --> 00:20:58,099
Men of our generation like
a little meat on their women.
373
00:20:58,123 --> 00:21:01,503
Maybe you don't want
to pinch an inch, but I do.
374
00:21:01,527 --> 00:21:03,572
Ooh, ooh, Milton!
375
00:21:03,596 --> 00:21:06,542
See you tonight at 7:00.
Tonight at 7:00, then.
376
00:21:06,566 --> 00:21:08,610
Good afternoon.
377
00:21:08,634 --> 00:21:10,679
I thought he belonged
to the other one.
378
00:21:10,703 --> 00:21:12,981
Well, I'm sure Rose
won't mind one bit.
379
00:21:13,005 --> 00:21:16,084
He's a man. It's not
like sharing a yogurt.
380
00:21:16,108 --> 00:21:18,720
- Hello, hello, hello!
- Hi, Dorothy.
381
00:21:18,744 --> 00:21:20,789
Honey, did Barry
call? Not that I know of.
382
00:21:20,813 --> 00:21:23,725
We're supposed to go out
again. Sounds like lunch went well.
383
00:21:23,749 --> 00:21:24,893
Oh, we had such fun.
384
00:21:24,917 --> 00:21:28,396
You know, Barry is
exactly as I remembered.
385
00:21:28,420 --> 00:21:29,731
Come on, now. After 35 years,
386
00:21:29,755 --> 00:21:31,833
there must have
been some surprises.
387
00:21:31,857 --> 00:21:36,004
Well, a few. You know, his hair's a little
thinner, he's put on a little weight.
388
00:21:36,028 --> 00:21:39,741
But is he still your fantasy lover,
or has the fantasy become a reality?
389
00:21:39,765 --> 00:21:42,711
Well, not exactly.
390
00:21:42,735 --> 00:21:45,547
You see, Barry Glick is gay.
391
00:21:45,571 --> 00:21:47,215
I knew he was gay.
392
00:21:47,239 --> 00:21:50,574
I could tell by the way he
used to worship Buster Crabbe.
393
00:21:52,411 --> 00:21:56,391
Oh, honey, are you just
devastated? Oh, hey, what the hell?
394
00:21:56,415 --> 00:22:00,062
I mean, if I can't have him, at least I
know no other woman can have him, either.
395
00:22:00,086 --> 00:22:01,797
Hi, girls! Oh, hi there!
396
00:22:01,821 --> 00:22:04,900
Hey, are we to assume
from your cheerful demeanor
397
00:22:04,924 --> 00:22:08,036
that we are talking to a
new hospital administrator?
398
00:22:08,060 --> 00:22:09,571
Not even close.
399
00:22:09,595 --> 00:22:11,773
Oh, what did you do,
take an antidepressant?
400
00:22:11,797 --> 00:22:13,675
Oh, don't be silly.
401
00:22:13,699 --> 00:22:16,678
But I was depressed -
incredibly depressed.
402
00:22:16,702 --> 00:22:19,280
I didn't know which way
to turn or where to go,
403
00:22:19,304 --> 00:22:22,484
so I stopped in at the coffee
shop at the Fountain Rock
404
00:22:22,508 --> 00:22:25,087
for a root beer float
to make me feel better.
405
00:22:25,111 --> 00:22:27,355
They make the most
terrific root beer float.
406
00:22:27,379 --> 00:22:29,190
They have that
old-fashioned root beer...
407
00:22:29,214 --> 00:22:32,494
Now look, Rose, get off
the float. Just get to the point.
408
00:22:32,518 --> 00:22:36,131
Well, after I drank it, I
started to get sad again,
409
00:22:36,155 --> 00:22:39,234
and then I saw the
answer right in front of me.
410
00:22:39,258 --> 00:22:41,536
What, what? A
"Help Wanted" sign.
411
00:22:41,560 --> 00:22:43,238
Oh? And, and?
412
00:22:43,262 --> 00:22:47,131
I am a waitress at the
Fountain Rock Coffee Shop!
413
00:22:51,270 --> 00:22:55,217
12 hours a day, four days a
week, minimum wage and tips,
414
00:22:55,241 --> 00:22:58,642
and a 60% employee
discount on day-old Danish!
415
00:23:02,281 --> 00:23:05,127
A coffee shop?
416
00:23:05,151 --> 00:23:07,462
Day-old Danish.
417
00:23:07,486 --> 00:23:08,530
Yeah!
418
00:23:08,554 --> 00:23:10,866
12-hour days in a
steamy hash joint
419
00:23:10,890 --> 00:23:13,234
serving chili to a bunch
of grubby truckers?
420
00:23:13,258 --> 00:23:14,569
Oh, come on, Blanche.
421
00:23:14,593 --> 00:23:16,905
I mean, she's working
at the Fountain Rock.
422
00:23:16,929 --> 00:23:19,607
It's not Mel's Diner.
423
00:23:19,631 --> 00:23:20,976
I mean, the worst
that can happen
424
00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:23,912
is she'll get scratched
by a pinkie ring.
425
00:23:23,936 --> 00:23:27,149
But 12 hours on your
feet, waiting tables?
426
00:23:27,173 --> 00:23:30,686
Honey, that is gritty,
grimy, grueling work!
427
00:23:30,710 --> 00:23:35,057
But it's work! It beats the hell
out of feeling sorry for myself,
428
00:23:35,081 --> 00:23:39,294
and it'll be a lot nicer to fall
asleep from being tired than crying.
429
00:23:39,318 --> 00:23:42,530
Of course it will.
Oh, Rose, honey.
430
00:23:42,554 --> 00:23:45,033
Rose, I am so happy for you.
431
00:23:45,057 --> 00:23:47,635
Well, heck, if you're
happy, then I'm happy, too.
432
00:23:47,659 --> 00:23:50,172
Oh, thank you for
seeing me through this.
433
00:23:50,196 --> 00:23:52,440
Honey, I wanted to ask you
about Milton, from the center?
434
00:23:52,464 --> 00:23:55,310
Yes. That is strictly a
professional relationship?
435
00:23:55,334 --> 00:23:59,681
Oh, absolutely! Oh, there couldn't
be anything between Milton and me.
436
00:23:59,705 --> 00:24:02,740
He has this thing about
only dating fat women.
33964
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