All language subtitles for The Daytrippers (1996) 1080p

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:02:49,711 --> 00:02:52,380 -Did you try that pumpkin pie? -[woman] No. 2 00:02:52,464 --> 00:02:55,508 It looked good, but how many desserts does my mother need to make? 3 00:02:55,592 --> 00:02:58,928 I don't know. I think Carl had one of everything though. 4 00:03:00,305 --> 00:03:02,349 I think Jo and Carl want to get married. 5 00:03:02,432 --> 00:03:04,684 Yeah, it seems that they really love each other. 6 00:03:04,768 --> 00:03:07,896 -Oh, I think they're in love. Don't you? -Yeah. 7 00:03:07,979 --> 00:03:10,190 It's just hard to tell sometimes from the outside. 8 00:03:10,273 --> 00:03:12,609 I think my mother would love for them to get married. 9 00:03:12,692 --> 00:03:14,277 Are you kidding? She's probably got the number 10 00:03:14,361 --> 00:03:17,072 of the catering hall on speed dial. 11 00:03:17,155 --> 00:03:20,241 Thanks for staying out so late. 12 00:03:22,577 --> 00:03:24,079 Happy Thanksgiving. 13 00:03:31,920 --> 00:03:33,755 [dog barking] 14 00:04:28,309 --> 00:04:29,811 I love you. 15 00:04:40,447 --> 00:04:42,449 You're wearing my favorite suit. 16 00:04:44,659 --> 00:04:47,829 I just can't wake up today. I don't know what's wrong with me. 17 00:04:47,912 --> 00:04:49,914 You have a good sleep? 18 00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:56,296 -You okay? -Mm-hmm. 19 00:04:56,379 --> 00:04:58,882 I'm sorry about tonight. I've really got to go to this thing. 20 00:04:58,965 --> 00:05:00,175 It's okay. 21 00:05:01,759 --> 00:05:03,720 Do you want to have dinner in the city tomorrow? 22 00:05:03,803 --> 00:05:05,722 -Yeah. -Okay. 23 00:05:08,183 --> 00:05:09,225 What? 24 00:05:46,387 --> 00:05:48,848 [man] The damn car's acting up again. 25 00:05:50,141 --> 00:05:52,393 It starts knocking when I turn the heater on. 26 00:05:52,477 --> 00:05:54,020 Why don't you get it checked? 27 00:05:54,103 --> 00:05:57,023 Kenny said there was nothing wrong with it. 28 00:05:57,106 --> 00:05:59,484 [woman] You never should've bought a used car. 29 00:06:00,860 --> 00:06:03,112 It's always made that knocking sound. 30 00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:05,573 Is it supposed to make that sound? 31 00:06:05,657 --> 00:06:08,618 Of course not. Are they up yet? 32 00:06:08,701 --> 00:06:10,703 [woman] Jo said she wanted to get up early. 33 00:06:10,787 --> 00:06:13,164 Knowing her, she'll probably sleep all day. 34 00:06:13,248 --> 00:06:15,291 Ah, shit! 35 00:06:17,252 --> 00:06:19,629 -[man exclaiming] -[mutters] 36 00:06:19,712 --> 00:06:21,047 [moans] 37 00:06:22,298 --> 00:06:23,550 Why? 38 00:06:24,926 --> 00:06:26,886 Why are you up so early? 39 00:06:29,514 --> 00:06:32,350 Mom and Dad are making so much fucking noise in the kitchen. 40 00:06:32,433 --> 00:06:34,519 -[moans] -[objects clattering] 41 00:06:34,602 --> 00:06:36,020 What are they doing? 42 00:06:36,980 --> 00:06:38,356 [man] Should we wake those two up? 43 00:06:38,439 --> 00:06:40,858 -[machine grinding] -Should we wake those two up? 44 00:06:40,942 --> 00:06:44,028 -I can't hear you! -Should we wake those two up? 45 00:06:44,112 --> 00:06:47,740 Well, if they ever want to get into the city, they should get up. 46 00:06:50,243 --> 00:06:51,661 [vacuum humming] 47 00:06:54,372 --> 00:06:58,126 [moans] Hey, Jo? We'd better not. 48 00:06:59,252 --> 00:07:01,087 Yeah, we'd better not. 49 00:07:02,380 --> 00:07:05,008 Um, you know, house rules and all. 50 00:07:06,759 --> 00:07:08,761 [objects clattering] 51 00:07:08,845 --> 00:07:11,848 Ooh, um... Hmm. Did you sleep well? 52 00:07:11,931 --> 00:07:14,767 Hmm-mm. I don't like sleeping without you. 53 00:07:14,851 --> 00:07:16,769 Yeah, well, 54 00:07:16,853 --> 00:07:20,106 your mother made it very clear that we shouldn't, uh... 55 00:07:20,189 --> 00:07:22,609 What does she think we do back home? 56 00:07:22,692 --> 00:07:24,861 -You know? -[moans] 57 00:07:24,944 --> 00:07:27,030 Josephine! 58 00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:32,619 Morning, Mrs. Malone. 59 00:07:32,702 --> 00:07:34,662 Oh, Carl. Did you sleep well? 60 00:07:34,746 --> 00:07:36,831 Yes. I had a wonderful night's sleep, thank you. 61 00:07:36,914 --> 00:07:38,166 Oh, good, good. 62 00:07:39,167 --> 00:07:41,794 Uh, what is it that smells so incredible? 63 00:07:41,878 --> 00:07:44,088 Oh, I was just making a little breakfast — 64 00:07:44,172 --> 00:07:47,342 bacon and eggs, sausage, pancakes, whatever you'd like. 65 00:07:47,425 --> 00:07:49,594 -Yum. -[both chuckle] 66 00:07:49,677 --> 00:07:52,805 Come on, Jo. Wake up! Soup's on! 67 00:07:54,390 --> 00:07:56,476 Would you like some Entenmann's? 68 00:07:56,559 --> 00:07:59,187 We got a really good price on this cake. 69 00:07:59,270 --> 00:08:01,230 Everything was two-for-one. 70 00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:03,775 Yeah. I mean, it was some sale. 71 00:08:05,401 --> 00:08:07,570 Here we go. 72 00:08:07,654 --> 00:08:10,740 How about some cinnamon filbert ring, huh? 73 00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:13,910 Mm, I don't want that. 74 00:08:13,993 --> 00:08:16,579 I don't normally eat this much for breakfast. 75 00:08:17,622 --> 00:08:21,459 Why do you... Why do you put this junk in your hair, huh? Why? 76 00:08:21,542 --> 00:08:24,962 This is an excellent cinnamon filbert ring, Rita. 77 00:08:25,046 --> 00:08:29,550 Are you at least going to comb this mess before you go outside? 78 00:08:29,634 --> 00:08:32,136 -Hmm-mm. -I see Carl doesn't find it necessary 79 00:08:32,220 --> 00:08:33,721 to deface himself. 80 00:08:33,805 --> 00:08:35,890 -Carl, show Mom your nipples. -[coughs] 81 00:08:35,973 --> 00:08:38,184 -[laughing] -Finish your breakfast. 82 00:08:39,268 --> 00:08:40,728 I'm done. 83 00:08:41,938 --> 00:08:44,982 Are you wearing that little skirt? You'll freeze to death. 84 00:08:45,066 --> 00:08:47,443 Dad, drive us to the train station! 85 00:08:48,236 --> 00:08:50,029 [Rita] Try to help her, Carl. 86 00:08:53,282 --> 00:08:55,993 -Hiya, Dad. -Hey, kid. What brings you here? 87 00:08:56,077 --> 00:08:57,954 I got to talk to Mom about something. 88 00:08:58,037 --> 00:09:00,665 -Just in time for breakfast. -Oh, I'm not hungry. 89 00:09:00,748 --> 00:09:02,208 -Good morning, my darling. -Good morning. 90 00:09:02,291 --> 00:09:04,460 -How are you? -I'm good. How you doin', Miss Malone? 91 00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:05,920 Oh, fine. 92 00:09:06,754 --> 00:09:09,048 We should show this to someone who would understand it. 93 00:09:09,132 --> 00:09:11,843 Wait a minute. I don't want to make a big deal out of this. 94 00:09:11,926 --> 00:09:14,637 -Who knows what this is. -Ah, don't worry. 95 00:09:14,721 --> 00:09:16,472 We'll keep it in the family. 96 00:09:17,849 --> 00:09:21,936 "Dearest, please accept this token of my love and devotion. 97 00:09:22,019 --> 00:09:25,106 I'm grateful for what we have, but I want so much more. 98 00:09:26,023 --> 00:09:28,526 In short, I want you entirely. 99 00:09:28,609 --> 00:09:30,653 Alas, as Andrew Marvell wrote, 100 00:09:30,737 --> 00:09:32,488 'Therefore, the love which us doth bind 101 00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:35,241 but fate so enviously debars 102 00:09:35,324 --> 00:09:40,037 is the conjunction of the mind and opposition of the stars.' 103 00:09:40,121 --> 00:09:41,789 Love forever, Sandy." 104 00:09:41,873 --> 00:09:44,834 [Rita] Carl, you're a very smart young man. What is this? 105 00:09:44,917 --> 00:09:47,378 I don't understand poetry. 106 00:09:47,462 --> 00:09:50,631 Well, Andrew Marvell was a 17th-century poet, 107 00:09:50,715 --> 00:09:52,425 a predecessor of Shakespeare's, 108 00:09:52,508 --> 00:09:55,595 one of the Elizabethan metaphysical poets. 109 00:09:55,678 --> 00:09:57,430 This poem... 110 00:09:57,513 --> 00:10:00,099 Basically, the poem says that 111 00:10:00,183 --> 00:10:04,061 love binds us together and we're like, totally in sync, 112 00:10:04,145 --> 00:10:07,690 but it's a drag because circumstances keep us apart. 113 00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:11,778 -Do you think this was written to Louis? -No. I mean, I hope not. 114 00:10:11,861 --> 00:10:14,739 -Do you know who Sandy is? -No, I have no idea. 115 00:10:14,822 --> 00:10:17,992 Carl, couldn't this be a note from a barracuda 116 00:10:18,075 --> 00:10:20,536 who was having an affair with a married man? 117 00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:23,915 -I... -We don't know who this was written to. 118 00:10:23,998 --> 00:10:26,250 Eliza, you should call Louis. 119 00:10:26,334 --> 00:10:29,253 I should just call him and ask him what this is. 120 00:10:29,337 --> 00:10:30,630 [Rita] No, no. 121 00:10:30,713 --> 00:10:34,383 I don't think that's a smart idea. 122 00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:37,929 -Why not? -It's very easy to lie on the phone. 123 00:10:39,055 --> 00:10:41,516 See, you can't see the eyes. 124 00:10:41,599 --> 00:10:44,185 The eyes always give you away. 125 00:10:44,268 --> 00:10:46,562 -So what should I do? -I suggest 126 00:10:46,646 --> 00:10:50,608 that we drive you into the city and you talk to him face to face. 127 00:10:50,691 --> 00:10:53,027 [Jo] Um, are you sure this is such a good idea? 128 00:10:53,110 --> 00:10:55,279 [scoffs] It's not up to me. 129 00:10:56,447 --> 00:10:59,075 Eliza, what do you think? 130 00:11:10,419 --> 00:11:12,922 [Rita] Carl, why don't you sit in the front? 131 00:11:13,005 --> 00:11:15,383 You're so tall, you'll get all squished back there. 132 00:11:15,466 --> 00:11:18,135 -I'll be fine, but thank you, Rita. -Sure. 133 00:12:15,318 --> 00:12:17,445 [Jo] Look at these hideous buildings. 134 00:12:17,528 --> 00:12:19,655 Architecture is dead. 135 00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:22,533 The architects have run out of ideas. It's all references. 136 00:12:22,617 --> 00:12:26,746 The Europeans may have been Imperialists, but they knew how to make a building. 137 00:12:29,498 --> 00:12:31,667 You know what, you guys? 138 00:12:31,751 --> 00:12:35,212 Things are fine — I mean, they're great — between me and Louis, 139 00:12:35,296 --> 00:12:38,215 you know, in... in every department. 140 00:12:38,299 --> 00:12:41,761 -Everything is fine. -I know, I know, honey. Of course. 141 00:12:43,262 --> 00:12:46,807 Oh, Jo, you remember your little friend Vinnie Tucillo? 142 00:12:46,891 --> 00:12:48,059 Uh, yeah. 143 00:12:48,142 --> 00:12:51,020 Well, Mrs. O'Connor told me he was just sent to jail. 144 00:12:51,103 --> 00:12:52,355 What took so long? 145 00:12:52,438 --> 00:12:56,817 Did you hear about Mr. Andrews having an affair with a tenth-grader? 146 00:12:56,901 --> 00:12:59,779 They fired him. I mean, it was some scandal. 147 00:12:59,862 --> 00:13:02,156 Did you know my mom writes the society page 148 00:13:02,239 --> 00:13:04,116 for the Deer Park Pennysaver? 149 00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:06,118 -Really? -No. 150 00:13:06,202 --> 00:13:09,914 Also, I mean, he works for a publishing company. 151 00:13:09,997 --> 00:13:12,667 You know, he's got other people's manuscripts, 152 00:13:12,750 --> 00:13:14,794 all kinds of stuff in his briefcase. 153 00:13:14,877 --> 00:13:16,837 That note could've belonged to anyone. 154 00:13:16,921 --> 00:13:19,173 -[tires screech] -Jim, watch out! 155 00:13:19,256 --> 00:13:21,676 -That truck, idiot! -He's nowhere near me. 156 00:13:21,759 --> 00:13:25,054 -So what are you guys gonna do today? -Shopping. 157 00:13:25,137 --> 00:13:28,683 I was thinking we'd check out the Dutch modernism show at the Cooper-Hewitt. 158 00:13:31,185 --> 00:13:33,980 -Are you guys gonna stay in Michigan? -Yeah. 159 00:13:34,063 --> 00:13:36,899 Yeah, for now. Carl's got this great job. 160 00:13:36,983 --> 00:13:41,195 No, it's just construction work. The pay's really good, so... 161 00:13:41,278 --> 00:13:44,991 Carl, tell Mom and Dad about your novel. Carl wrote a novel, everyone. 162 00:13:45,074 --> 00:13:48,369 It's great. It's just far-out. It's brilliant. 163 00:13:48,452 --> 00:13:50,579 I don't think your parents want to hear about my novel. 164 00:13:50,663 --> 00:13:52,832 Mom and Dad, do you want to hear about Carl's novel? 165 00:13:52,915 --> 00:13:57,503 -Oh, yeah. Sure, Carl. -Well, uh, Rita, 166 00:13:57,586 --> 00:14:01,424 it's an allegory about spiritual survival in the contemporary world. 167 00:14:01,507 --> 00:14:03,592 The main character is this freak of nature. 168 00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:06,721 He's this man who doesn't have a normal head. 169 00:14:06,804 --> 00:14:10,808 -He was born with a dog's head. -A dog's head? 170 00:14:10,891 --> 00:14:13,728 Yeah. You know, sort of a fantastical story. 171 00:14:13,811 --> 00:14:16,731 -It's like a fable. -Yeah, like Master and Margarita or... 172 00:14:16,814 --> 00:14:19,567 -Animal Farm. -Yeah, exactly. Very Kafka-esque. 173 00:14:19,650 --> 00:14:22,653 Carl, I'm not an educated woman. 174 00:14:22,737 --> 00:14:26,782 -It's Dr. Seuss for adults, Mom. -Oh. Oh, yeah. 175 00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:30,578 So everybody else in the book is normal except the man with the dog's head, 176 00:14:30,661 --> 00:14:32,496 -who really only wants — -What kind of dog? 177 00:14:32,580 --> 00:14:35,041 -Dad, it's not important. -No, no. No, no, no. It is important. 178 00:14:35,124 --> 00:14:38,711 Actually, that's very important. It's a German Shorthaired Pointer. 179 00:14:38,794 --> 00:14:41,922 You see, it's actually especially important that it's a pointer 180 00:14:42,006 --> 00:14:44,800 because that's a crucial metaphor, because in the book, he's sort of a... 181 00:14:44,884 --> 00:14:48,888 He's sort of a visionary, you know? You know, pointing the way to salvation? 182 00:14:48,971 --> 00:14:50,681 Jo loves dogs. 183 00:14:50,765 --> 00:14:53,476 Remember Pepper? We had to put her to sleep. 184 00:14:53,559 --> 00:14:55,519 Mother... 185 00:14:55,603 --> 00:14:58,606 [clears throat] So, uh, the man with the dog's head, 186 00:14:58,689 --> 00:15:00,858 who has been treated like a freak all of his life, 187 00:15:00,941 --> 00:15:03,027 get discovered by these people who exploit him 188 00:15:03,110 --> 00:15:06,155 by putting him on every daytime talk show on TV. 189 00:15:06,238 --> 00:15:09,992 But the man with the dog's head realizes he's got the ear of the entire nation, 190 00:15:10,076 --> 00:15:12,286 so he starts to tell people what he really thinks. 191 00:15:12,369 --> 00:15:15,039 He starts to criticize society. He starts to talk about 192 00:15:15,122 --> 00:15:17,208 how crass it is, how unfeeling. 193 00:15:17,291 --> 00:15:20,002 And as people start to, you know, respond to his message, 194 00:15:20,086 --> 00:15:23,047 he develops this following, which just gets bigger and bigger 195 00:15:23,130 --> 00:15:25,758 until he's this huge visionary leader. 196 00:15:25,841 --> 00:15:27,927 [Rita] Oh, you mean like he can talk, 197 00:15:28,010 --> 00:15:30,346 -just like a person. -Well, yeah. 198 00:15:30,429 --> 00:15:34,350 He's normal in every way except for, you know, the dog's head. 199 00:15:34,433 --> 00:15:37,436 Ah. Now, how would you do that? 200 00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:40,231 -Mom, it's a book, it isn't a movie. -Carl, 201 00:15:40,314 --> 00:15:43,984 -how do you think up this stuff? -Mother... 202 00:15:44,068 --> 00:15:46,904 -[engine clattering] -Goddamn it! 203 00:15:46,987 --> 00:15:50,116 -[Eliza] What the hell is that? -[Jo] What's causing it, Dad? 204 00:15:50,199 --> 00:15:53,327 I don't know. I think it's got something to do with the heater. 205 00:15:53,410 --> 00:15:56,580 I told you to bring the car into Kenny. 206 00:15:56,664 --> 00:15:58,249 [Jim] I did. 207 00:15:58,332 --> 00:16:00,292 It didn't knock for him. 208 00:16:01,418 --> 00:16:03,712 Louis's father had a mistress. 209 00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:07,174 Louis is nothing like his father. 210 00:16:07,258 --> 00:16:10,052 Well, thank God. But then again, who knows? 211 00:16:10,136 --> 00:16:13,681 -They say it's often inherited. -[indistinct] 212 00:16:13,764 --> 00:16:16,976 I just can't see Louis doing anything like that, Mom. 213 00:16:17,059 --> 00:16:18,477 He's not like that. 214 00:16:18,561 --> 00:16:20,604 Well, he'd better not be. 215 00:16:22,148 --> 00:16:23,858 I'm gonna go to the bathroom. 216 00:16:27,611 --> 00:16:31,866 He can't fix it now, but we'll be all right if we don't turn the heater on. 217 00:16:32,908 --> 00:16:34,451 No heat? 218 00:16:35,661 --> 00:16:38,247 Now are you glad you wore that little skirt? 219 00:17:01,729 --> 00:17:03,355 [tires squeal] 220 00:17:03,439 --> 00:17:05,024 [horn honks] 221 00:17:06,609 --> 00:17:09,361 -[Eliza] Okay, Dad, make a right on Park. -[Rita] Did you hear her? 222 00:17:09,445 --> 00:17:12,323 I heard her, okay? 223 00:17:12,406 --> 00:17:13,782 Are you cold back there? 224 00:17:13,866 --> 00:17:16,076 -No. -Really? 225 00:17:16,160 --> 00:17:18,913 -I'm chilly. -We're almost there, Mom. 226 00:17:29,089 --> 00:17:31,508 -I want to see him alone. -Of course. 227 00:17:32,509 --> 00:17:35,012 -Hello. Can I help you? -[Eliza] Yeah, hi. 228 00:17:35,095 --> 00:17:38,599 I'd like to see Louis D'Amico in the marketing and publicity department. 229 00:17:38,682 --> 00:17:41,727 -And your name is? -Eliza D'Amico. I'm his wife. 230 00:17:41,810 --> 00:17:45,606 Oh, I knew you looked familiar. We met at the party at the Rainbow Room. 231 00:17:45,689 --> 00:17:47,942 -Oh, uh, Cassandra. -Yes! 232 00:17:48,025 --> 00:17:50,486 -Oh, hi. It's nice to see you. -You too. 233 00:17:50,569 --> 00:17:52,696 -This is my mother. -Oh. 234 00:17:52,780 --> 00:17:55,658 Hi. I'm Louis's mother-in-law. 235 00:17:55,741 --> 00:17:57,576 So nice to meet you. 236 00:17:57,660 --> 00:18:02,248 You are so lucky to have Louis. He's so sweet. 237 00:18:02,915 --> 00:18:05,042 We all love Louis. 238 00:18:07,544 --> 00:18:10,381 I love your — what do you call that, a brooch? 239 00:18:10,464 --> 00:18:12,549 Isn't it cute? Thanks. 240 00:18:14,134 --> 00:18:16,095 So let me get Louis for you. 241 00:18:17,429 --> 00:18:19,515 [clears throat] 242 00:18:19,598 --> 00:18:21,767 Hi. Is Louis in? 243 00:18:22,685 --> 00:18:24,228 Uh-huh. 244 00:18:24,311 --> 00:18:26,605 When will he be back? 245 00:18:26,689 --> 00:18:29,233 Oh, really? Okay. Thanks. Bye. 246 00:18:30,526 --> 00:18:34,196 He's out. Chap gave him the rest of the day off 'cause of the holidays. 247 00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:35,990 But you know what you should do? 248 00:18:36,073 --> 00:18:39,076 Why don't you go back and talk to Chap, 'cause he might know more. 249 00:18:39,159 --> 00:18:40,911 Do you know which way to go? 250 00:18:45,040 --> 00:18:48,585 [man] Uh, did you hear the reading on the 23rd moved to the 25th? 251 00:18:49,670 --> 00:18:51,630 Listen. I got a story for you. 252 00:18:53,173 --> 00:18:56,218 Friday night, I'm at the Three Deuces, right, and I'm wasted. 253 00:18:56,302 --> 00:19:00,514 And, uh, I start talking to this sweet, soft-spoken girl, right? 254 00:19:00,597 --> 00:19:03,517 And I'm really digging her, but I'm not getting any vibe back, 255 00:19:03,600 --> 00:19:05,519 and it's not going anywhere. 256 00:19:05,602 --> 00:19:07,813 Then this punk chick from the other end of the bar 257 00:19:07,896 --> 00:19:10,649 comes over and starts talking to us, and right off the bat, 258 00:19:10,733 --> 00:19:13,819 -she starts talking about sex. -What did she look like? 259 00:19:13,902 --> 00:19:17,031 She was sexy, in a Ruben-esque kind of way. 260 00:19:17,114 --> 00:19:20,075 -She was fat? -No, she was... voluptuous. 261 00:19:20,159 --> 00:19:23,954 She was full, okay? And she starts telling me about her sex life 262 00:19:24,038 --> 00:19:26,332 in unbelievably explicit detail. 263 00:19:26,415 --> 00:19:30,085 Isn't it weird when a total stranger tells you that much about their sex life? 264 00:19:30,169 --> 00:19:32,379 I mean, that's a little desperate, right? 265 00:19:32,463 --> 00:19:34,465 Desperate — that's your type. 266 00:19:34,548 --> 00:19:36,467 So eventually, 267 00:19:36,550 --> 00:19:40,095 the sweet girl goes to the restroom and I'm alone with this punk chick. 268 00:19:40,179 --> 00:19:43,682 And I figure, what the hell? Might as well add me to the list, right? 269 00:19:43,766 --> 00:19:46,060 So I go, "Let's go over to my place.” 270 00:19:46,143 --> 00:19:49,313 And she looks at me like, "You're disgusting!" and takes off. 271 00:19:49,396 --> 00:19:52,066 -I hope that's not the end of this yarn. -No. 272 00:19:52,149 --> 00:19:56,320 Then I notice that there was a $20 bill I'd left on the bar, and it's gone, 273 00:19:56,403 --> 00:19:57,988 and this punk chick ripped me off. 274 00:19:58,072 --> 00:20:01,575 By now I'm really bombed. It's late. What am I gonna do? 275 00:20:01,658 --> 00:20:03,869 Now the bar's closing, they're kicking everybody out, 276 00:20:03,952 --> 00:20:06,246 and I offer to walk the sweet girl home. 277 00:20:06,330 --> 00:20:10,209 And get this. She goes, "Let's go to your place." 278 00:20:10,292 --> 00:20:14,254 -Really? Do tell. -Well, it was a lot of fun. 279 00:20:14,338 --> 00:20:16,715 And as you may know, it's been a while for me, 280 00:20:16,799 --> 00:20:20,886 so she had to kind of walk me through it, but we took care of business. 281 00:20:20,969 --> 00:20:23,889 Next morning, I wake up with this woman, 282 00:20:23,972 --> 00:20:26,934 realize I have completely forgotten her name. 283 00:20:27,017 --> 00:20:28,811 Well, you're a classy guy. 284 00:20:28,894 --> 00:20:31,146 I'm telling you, man, I am racking my brain. 285 00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:33,982 Finally she goes to the bathroom. I start rooting through her purse. 286 00:20:34,066 --> 00:20:37,194 I'm whipping things out. I pull out a credit card that says Cindy Bartlett. 287 00:20:37,277 --> 00:20:39,905 Shove it back in just as she comes out. Everything's cool. 288 00:20:39,988 --> 00:20:43,617 I get her outside and in a cab. As she's getting in the cab, I say, 289 00:20:43,700 --> 00:20:46,829 "It was really nice seeing you, Cindy. Could I get your number?" 290 00:20:46,912 --> 00:20:51,250 And she looks at me like I'm insane. Hops in the cab, takes off. 291 00:20:51,333 --> 00:20:55,212 Last night, I'm back at the Three Deuces. I'm getting bombed. 292 00:20:55,295 --> 00:20:59,341 In walks the punk chick. I go, "I'm sorry. I can't remember your name." 293 00:20:59,425 --> 00:21:01,427 She goes, "Cindy Bartlett. 294 00:21:01,510 --> 00:21:05,097 And by the way, you didn't happen to find my wallet the other night, did you?" 295 00:21:05,180 --> 00:21:07,724 You banged a felon. Good for you. Are you waiting for Chap? 296 00:21:07,808 --> 00:21:10,310 -Yeah. -Are you an author? 297 00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:12,646 No. 298 00:21:12,729 --> 00:21:14,064 Too bad. 299 00:21:15,482 --> 00:21:19,027 You'd look good on a book jacket. My name's Eddie. 300 00:21:19,111 --> 00:21:22,698 How do you do? I'm Eliza D'Amico. My husband works here. 301 00:21:22,781 --> 00:21:24,283 Oh. 302 00:21:24,366 --> 00:21:27,661 I, um, have a book that they're publishing here. 303 00:21:27,744 --> 00:21:29,705 -Your husband is Louis? -Yes. 304 00:21:29,788 --> 00:21:32,875 -He's a great guy. -What's the name of your book? 305 00:21:32,958 --> 00:21:35,669 It's, uh, Earthly Delights. 306 00:21:35,752 --> 00:21:38,630 Earthly Delights? Oh, Edward Masler. 307 00:21:38,714 --> 00:21:42,718 Oh, yeah, I read your manuscript. It's very interesting. 308 00:21:42,801 --> 00:21:44,219 -Good "interesting?" -Yeah. 309 00:21:44,303 --> 00:21:46,805 Since you're a writer, can I ask you a literary question? 310 00:21:46,889 --> 00:21:48,974 You could ask me a literary question, yeah. 311 00:21:49,057 --> 00:21:51,643 Have you ever heard of the poet Andrew Marvell? 312 00:21:51,727 --> 00:21:54,563 Sure, he's great. He wrote one of my all-time favorite poems, 313 00:21:54,646 --> 00:21:56,607 "To His Coy Mistress." 314 00:21:56,690 --> 00:21:57,900 Well... 315 00:21:58,984 --> 00:22:00,986 do you recognize this? 316 00:22:03,489 --> 00:22:07,826 "Therefore the love which us doth bind but fate so enviously debars 317 00:22:07,910 --> 00:22:10,662 is the conjunction of the mind and opposition of the stars." 318 00:22:10,746 --> 00:22:13,749 That's the end of "The Definition of Love." It's a beautiful poem. 319 00:22:15,501 --> 00:22:19,296 -It's a love poem? -Yeah, it's full of great images. 320 00:22:19,379 --> 00:22:22,883 He uses the image of himself and his true love 321 00:22:22,966 --> 00:22:26,637 on opposite poles of the earth. 322 00:22:26,720 --> 00:22:30,682 The last line, "the opposition of the stars," has a double meaning. 323 00:22:30,766 --> 00:22:32,851 He's talking about the fact that 324 00:22:32,935 --> 00:22:36,313 they can't see the same stars, the same heaven, 325 00:22:36,396 --> 00:22:39,316 because they're on opposite sides of the planet, and also, uh, 326 00:22:39,399 --> 00:22:42,194 it means that their love IS in opposition to the stars, 327 00:22:42,277 --> 00:22:43,487 against fate. 328 00:22:45,906 --> 00:22:48,825 There's a great line somewhere like, um, 329 00:22:48,909 --> 00:22:52,371 "Our love is truly parallel... 330 00:22:53,455 --> 00:22:56,792 though infinite, can never meet." 331 00:22:58,544 --> 00:23:01,463 Their love is perfect but impossible. 332 00:23:04,383 --> 00:23:07,344 -Are you all right? -Oh, yes. 333 00:23:07,427 --> 00:23:10,389 Hello, Eliza. Can you give me one sec, please? 334 00:23:10,472 --> 00:23:13,141 Aaron, did you fax that press release? 335 00:23:13,225 --> 00:23:15,227 No, I'm, um, writing it right now. 336 00:23:15,310 --> 00:23:18,021 Oh, well, please, Aaron, take your time. 337 00:23:18,105 --> 00:23:20,816 I think since we've completely missed the deadline, 338 00:23:20,899 --> 00:23:24,152 you might as well take the whole weekend to write the tiny paragraph. 339 00:23:24,236 --> 00:23:26,947 -Oops. -Sorry. I was chewing his ear off. 340 00:23:27,030 --> 00:23:30,367 Well, that's all right. It's lucky these cubicles absorb all sound. 341 00:23:30,450 --> 00:23:33,120 Otherwise... [chuckles] God knows what kind of pathetic stories 342 00:23:33,203 --> 00:23:35,622 I'd have to hear about my employees' sex lives. 343 00:23:37,291 --> 00:23:40,168 -So, Eliza, how can I help you? -Oh, uh, 344 00:23:40,252 --> 00:23:44,172 I made a last-minute trip into the city. My sister's visiting, 345 00:23:44,256 --> 00:23:47,801 and we just thought we'd stop by and see if Louis was around. 346 00:23:47,884 --> 00:23:50,345 Oh, I'm sorry. I gave Louis the rest of the day off. 347 00:23:50,429 --> 00:23:52,973 I don't know where he went. He might check in. 348 00:23:53,056 --> 00:23:55,267 Oh, you know what? The book party tonight. 349 00:23:55,350 --> 00:23:57,728 I might have an invitation somewhere. 350 00:23:57,811 --> 00:23:59,563 I have one. 351 00:23:59,646 --> 00:24:00,981 Oh, very nice. 352 00:24:01,064 --> 00:24:03,108 -Thank you. -I'm sure Louis will be there. 353 00:24:03,191 --> 00:24:05,777 All right. Thank you. Nice to meet you. 354 00:24:05,861 --> 00:24:07,237 Nice to meet you. 355 00:24:09,281 --> 00:24:11,491 Your name is Sandra? 356 00:24:11,575 --> 00:24:13,452 No, Cassandra. 357 00:24:14,369 --> 00:24:17,247 [chuckles] That's beautiful. 358 00:24:18,165 --> 00:24:22,419 -Thanks. -I bet a lot of people call you Sandy. 359 00:24:22,502 --> 00:24:23,837 No. 360 00:24:23,920 --> 00:24:27,090 No one's ever called me Sandy. 361 00:24:27,174 --> 00:24:29,301 -No? -Yeah. 362 00:24:31,219 --> 00:24:32,804 -[phone rings] -Excuse me. 363 00:24:34,473 --> 00:24:35,974 Cordelia Press. 364 00:24:37,142 --> 00:24:38,769 Chap doesn't know where Louis is, 365 00:24:38,852 --> 00:24:41,229 but he said that he should be at this book party later. 366 00:24:41,313 --> 00:24:43,649 I don't know. What should we do? 367 00:24:43,732 --> 00:24:46,318 Where does Louis work? Where is his desk? 368 00:24:46,401 --> 00:24:48,945 We should take a look. 369 00:24:49,029 --> 00:24:50,113 No! 370 00:25:01,041 --> 00:25:03,543 [rap music playing] 371 00:25:05,420 --> 00:25:07,255 I'm gonna get a paper. 372 00:25:12,969 --> 00:25:14,471 Dad... 373 00:25:17,140 --> 00:25:19,059 My mom's driving me insane. 374 00:25:19,142 --> 00:25:21,728 Oh, sweetie, you shouldn't let them bother you. 375 00:25:21,812 --> 00:25:23,480 She's so out of touch. 376 00:25:23,563 --> 00:25:26,316 -Yeah, but it's not her fault. -Why do you say that? 377 00:25:26,400 --> 00:25:28,944 I mean, it's the fate of the middle class. 378 00:25:29,027 --> 00:25:32,072 Everything about middle-class life — you know, cars, 379 00:25:32,155 --> 00:25:34,533 suburbs, strip malls, tabloid television — 380 00:25:34,616 --> 00:25:37,661 It's all designed to keep people from having meaningful interactions. 381 00:25:37,744 --> 00:25:40,372 The average American knows more about the latest maniac 382 00:25:40,455 --> 00:25:44,292 who keeps human heads in their freezer than they do about their own spouse. 383 00:25:44,376 --> 00:25:46,086 And that's a — that's — You know, that — 384 00:25:46,169 --> 00:25:48,338 Yeah, that is the big failing of a democracy. 385 00:25:48,422 --> 00:25:51,425 It tends towards the middle, towards mediocrity. 386 00:25:52,801 --> 00:25:56,096 -What's the alternative? -We'd be better off under an aristocracy. 387 00:25:56,179 --> 00:26:00,058 I know it's not a fair system, but there's never gonna be a fair system. 388 00:26:00,142 --> 00:26:05,605 At least the aristocrats had taste. They did things with class. 389 00:26:05,689 --> 00:26:08,191 Christ, they even went to the guillotine with class. 390 00:26:10,235 --> 00:26:15,073 But-But what about the rest of us, the non-aristocrats? 391 00:26:15,157 --> 00:26:20,620 Well, those of us who had the ambition and intelligence and talent 392 00:26:20,704 --> 00:26:23,039 would find ways of joining the aristocracy, 393 00:26:23,123 --> 00:26:25,584 and the rest, you know, those who don't give a damn 394 00:26:25,667 --> 00:26:27,711 about art and culture anyways would work. 395 00:26:27,794 --> 00:26:29,045 There's nothing wrong with work. 396 00:26:29,129 --> 00:26:32,174 I respect the working class far more than I do the middle class. 397 00:26:32,257 --> 00:26:35,802 Those people, you know, they're connected to the earth. 398 00:26:35,886 --> 00:26:39,806 They have values. They have God. 399 00:26:39,890 --> 00:26:42,976 What does the middle class have? Infomercials. 400 00:26:44,644 --> 00:26:46,396 Mm. Ugh. 401 00:26:48,482 --> 00:26:50,108 I have to pee again. 402 00:26:55,614 --> 00:26:59,117 Try and forgive your mother. She truly is the victim of a deadly system. 403 00:27:01,244 --> 00:27:04,831 I saw this on Matlock the other night. You press the redial button, 404 00:27:04,915 --> 00:27:07,501 and then the phone rings the last number Louis called. 405 00:27:07,584 --> 00:27:09,795 -Oh, please. Mom, don't. -[line ringing] 406 00:27:09,878 --> 00:27:11,296 -It's ringing. -[phone rings] 407 00:27:11,379 --> 00:27:12,547 See? 408 00:27:15,550 --> 00:27:17,385 Hello, Mom. 409 00:27:18,136 --> 00:27:21,181 -What is the matter with you? -This is ridiculous. 410 00:27:21,264 --> 00:27:24,935 -Don't, no. You're gonna mess up his desk. -I'm looking, that's all. I'm looking. 411 00:27:25,018 --> 00:27:27,395 Don't touch all of his papers. 412 00:27:27,479 --> 00:27:30,565 Mom, just stop. This is an invasion of privacy, okay? 413 00:27:30,649 --> 00:27:32,859 It's one thing when you used to read my diary — 414 00:27:32,943 --> 00:27:35,695 -I never read your diary. -Mom, please? 415 00:27:35,779 --> 00:27:37,280 For God's sake. 416 00:27:39,658 --> 00:27:42,536 -[dial tone, numbers beeping] -Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. 417 00:27:43,787 --> 00:27:45,664 I can't believe I'm doing this. 418 00:27:45,747 --> 00:27:48,959 [Louis] Hi, you've reached the home of Eliza and Louis. Please leave — 419 00:27:49,042 --> 00:27:51,795 [numbers beeping, line ringing] 420 00:27:51,878 --> 00:27:53,880 [Cassandra] Cordelia Press. 421 00:27:53,964 --> 00:27:55,757 Eliza, look at this. 422 00:27:59,302 --> 00:28:01,346 That doesn't prove anything. 423 00:28:01,429 --> 00:28:03,515 -[line ringing] -[scoffs] 424 00:28:03,598 --> 00:28:06,142 -Look. -Hi, you've reached Sandy and Monica. 425 00:28:06,226 --> 00:28:09,646 We're not in. Leave a message, and we'll get back to you. Thanks. 426 00:28:09,729 --> 00:28:11,481 Well, the pictures on the street, 427 00:28:11,565 --> 00:28:14,276 they're wearing the same clothes they were wearing at the party. 428 00:28:14,359 --> 00:28:15,902 -Sandy could live here. -Look at this. 429 00:28:15,986 --> 00:28:17,863 There's a restaurant in the background. You see that? 430 00:28:17,946 --> 00:28:21,825 -Oh, my G — It says "Berry's"? "Berry's"? -Yep, that's what it says. 431 00:28:21,908 --> 00:28:24,828 -Wow. -I'm worried. I'm very worried. 432 00:28:24,911 --> 00:28:27,414 It still doesn't prove anything. 433 00:28:30,876 --> 00:28:32,419 375 Spring Street. 434 00:28:44,306 --> 00:28:47,726 There's that steakhouse we used to go to with Ken and Eileen. 435 00:28:47,809 --> 00:28:49,060 Oh, yeah. 436 00:28:51,771 --> 00:28:53,982 What if Louis is involved with this woman? 437 00:28:55,734 --> 00:28:59,404 If Louis is cheating, I can assure you it has nothing to do with love. 438 00:28:59,487 --> 00:29:00,614 I know men. 439 00:29:00,697 --> 00:29:03,575 Maybe Sandy's this really incredible person. 440 00:29:03,658 --> 00:29:05,619 [Rita] If she's so incredible, 441 00:29:05,702 --> 00:29:08,580 then why would she go after someone else's husband? 442 00:29:08,663 --> 00:29:10,498 Maybe she's desperately in love with him. 443 00:29:10,582 --> 00:29:14,085 Don't be ridiculous. Nobody's desperately in love. 444 00:29:14,169 --> 00:29:18,214 Eliza, don't worry about it. You don't know if Louis has done anything. 445 00:29:19,341 --> 00:29:22,135 It would never occur to me to write a note like this. 446 00:29:22,218 --> 00:29:26,473 Anyone can copy some 17th-century Elizabethan metaphysical poet. 447 00:29:28,516 --> 00:29:30,352 You know, from a book. 448 00:29:46,326 --> 00:29:48,703 That's Berry's there. Then it has to be — 449 00:29:48,787 --> 00:29:52,248 Louis is entering a blue door. We should look for a blue door. 450 00:29:53,291 --> 00:29:55,543 We're gonna look for clues across the street, Eliza. 451 00:29:55,627 --> 00:29:56,962 [Eliza] Okay. 452 00:30:19,818 --> 00:30:21,194 Mom, look. 453 00:30:21,277 --> 00:30:22,404 What? 454 00:30:24,406 --> 00:30:26,491 Come on over here. We found it. 455 00:30:28,952 --> 00:30:31,788 Monica Young, Sandy Pierce. 2A. 456 00:30:31,871 --> 00:30:33,832 What should we do? 457 00:30:34,541 --> 00:30:36,292 -Should we ring the buzzer? -No. 458 00:30:37,460 --> 00:30:39,796 Let's just wait and see if somebody shows up. 459 00:30:41,673 --> 00:30:43,800 You guys should go. I'm ruining your day. 460 00:30:43,883 --> 00:30:47,554 -We don't mind being here, do we, Carl? -God, no. Of course not. 461 00:30:47,637 --> 00:30:49,305 Thanks, guys. 462 00:30:53,768 --> 00:30:56,062 Mom almost caught us doing it this morning. 463 00:30:57,063 --> 00:30:58,940 Are you kidding me? 464 00:30:59,024 --> 00:31:00,942 I snuck into bed with Carl. 465 00:31:02,152 --> 00:31:04,404 Louis and I never did it in that house. 466 00:31:04,487 --> 00:31:06,156 Why not? You're allowed to. 467 00:31:06,239 --> 00:31:10,243 I know, but Mom's always snooping around. I don't want her hearing me orgasm. 468 00:31:11,786 --> 00:31:15,874 Do it in the morning, when she's so busy letting Dad have it in the kitchen. 469 00:31:19,210 --> 00:31:22,422 I hope you're taking precautions with Carl. 470 00:31:22,505 --> 00:31:26,217 Oh, yeah. We use a condom and spermicidal gooey stuff. 471 00:31:26,301 --> 00:31:27,469 Good. 472 00:31:29,637 --> 00:31:31,681 Are you still trying to get pregnant? 473 00:31:31,765 --> 00:31:35,268 Well, we were, but we kind of stopped. Louis feels he isn't ready yet. 474 00:31:36,269 --> 00:31:37,270 Mm. 475 00:31:39,898 --> 00:31:41,441 Can I have a cigarette? 476 00:31:48,031 --> 00:31:50,867 Why did I wear this skirt? I am so cold. 477 00:31:50,950 --> 00:31:52,952 -Don't let Mom hear you say that. -[chuckles] 478 00:31:55,830 --> 00:31:57,749 -There you go. -Thanks. 479 00:32:05,715 --> 00:32:08,218 Okay, Mom, you win. I am freezing my ass off. 480 00:32:08,301 --> 00:32:10,762 I think there's a coat in the back somewhere. 481 00:32:10,845 --> 00:32:13,098 [Rita] If you can find it in that mess. 482 00:32:18,144 --> 00:32:20,688 Oh, thank you, Carl. 483 00:32:21,648 --> 00:32:24,943 We have been freezing to death in here. 484 00:32:26,986 --> 00:32:29,405 [Rita] Ah! What is this? 485 00:32:29,489 --> 00:32:32,992 [Carl] It's herbal tea. I got it from the gourmet shop on the corner. 486 00:32:33,076 --> 00:32:35,745 -It's, uh, jasmine blend. -[Rita] Ooh! 487 00:32:35,829 --> 00:32:40,250 So, Carl, why don't you finish telling us the story of your novel? 488 00:32:40,333 --> 00:32:42,919 Oh, I don't think everyone wants to hear that. 489 00:32:43,002 --> 00:32:44,712 -Oh, come on. -I'd like to. 490 00:32:44,796 --> 00:32:47,465 [Rita] We all want to hear, Carl. 491 00:32:47,549 --> 00:32:50,260 Well, when we left off, the man with the dog's head 492 00:32:50,343 --> 00:32:52,470 had become this sort of charismatic figure, 493 00:32:52,554 --> 00:32:55,265 boldly challenging the complacency of society. 494 00:32:55,348 --> 00:32:58,017 He refers to our "pass the buck" political system as 495 00:32:58,101 --> 00:33:00,270 -a corrupt role model for the individual, -Yeah. 496 00:33:00,353 --> 00:33:04,566 ...So he starts telling people, "Stop blaming each other for your own problems 497 00:33:04,649 --> 00:33:07,652 and look within yourselves for a way to effect change. 498 00:33:07,735 --> 00:33:09,571 -Right. -Everyone is really impressed. 499 00:33:09,654 --> 00:33:11,906 People seem to have completely forgotten that he is essentially 500 00:33:11,990 --> 00:33:14,701 one-eighth German Shorthaired Pointer. 501 00:33:14,784 --> 00:33:16,536 Then... 502 00:33:16,619 --> 00:33:19,414 this group of far-right religious extremists 503 00:33:19,497 --> 00:33:22,208 -plant a mail bomb in his office. -Oh, my God! 504 00:33:22,292 --> 00:33:25,003 The bomb goes off in his hands. He's rushed to the hospital. 505 00:33:25,086 --> 00:33:27,630 -It's not clear whether he will make it. -[Jim] Hey, look. 506 00:33:35,221 --> 00:33:38,224 -What should we do? -Liza, go talk to him. 507 00:33:49,360 --> 00:33:51,821 Okay, Jim, follow him. 508 00:33:53,448 --> 00:33:55,408 [Jo] Do you think they saw us? 509 00:33:56,242 --> 00:33:57,744 [Rita] They're gonna turn. 510 00:33:57,827 --> 00:34:00,622 -You got it clear, Dad. Make a right. -[Rita] Right. Right. 511 00:34:00,705 --> 00:34:02,749 [all talking at once] 512 00:34:04,417 --> 00:34:06,294 Hello! Aah! 513 00:34:07,128 --> 00:34:08,254 Go ahead. 514 00:34:08,880 --> 00:34:10,715 Go on! 515 00:34:10,798 --> 00:34:14,135 It's not red, it's amber. Amber doesn't mean you have to stop. 516 00:34:14,219 --> 00:34:16,012 What do you want me to do, drive up on the curb? 517 00:34:16,095 --> 00:34:18,431 That was the world's shortest car chase. 518 00:34:19,098 --> 00:34:20,558 -Eliza! -Rita? 519 00:34:25,271 --> 00:34:26,606 Mom! 520 00:34:30,109 --> 00:34:32,779 -Liza, yell to him. -I can't. 521 00:34:33,613 --> 00:34:36,991 -Louis! -Louder. Louis! 522 00:34:37,075 --> 00:34:38,618 Louis! 523 00:34:38,701 --> 00:34:42,538 Louis! Louis! 524 00:34:42,622 --> 00:34:44,332 -Louis! -[Jo] Mother! 525 00:34:46,167 --> 00:34:48,753 -Where's your father? -Just cool it. He's right there. 526 00:34:48,836 --> 00:34:52,423 Get back in the car. Get back in the car. We have to follow him. 527 00:34:52,507 --> 00:34:54,592 Back in the car, you idiot! 528 00:34:55,927 --> 00:34:57,679 -[Jim] Rita! -Jesus! Look out. 529 00:34:57,762 --> 00:35:00,848 Give her some air. We need to elevate her feet. Liza, put them in your lap. 530 00:35:00,932 --> 00:35:02,934 -Mama? -Jo, keep talking to her. 531 00:35:03,017 --> 00:35:05,270 We got to get her inside. Some place warm. 532 00:35:05,353 --> 00:35:08,523 -Don't go into the light, Mom. -Jo... 533 00:35:11,109 --> 00:35:13,194 -Excuse me. Do you live here? -Yeah. Why? 534 00:35:13,278 --> 00:35:14,779 My girlfriend's mother has just fainted. 535 00:35:14,862 --> 00:35:16,739 We need to get her inside, out of the cold. 536 00:35:16,823 --> 00:35:19,867 They are good people. This is not a scam. Can you help us, please? 537 00:35:19,951 --> 00:35:22,578 -I guess I — -Thank you. 538 00:35:22,662 --> 00:35:24,789 [all talking at once] 539 00:35:28,042 --> 00:35:31,129 -Dad, we need the couch. -Sit down here, Rita. Are you all right? 540 00:35:31,212 --> 00:35:33,673 -Easy, easy. -[groaning] 541 00:35:33,756 --> 00:35:36,217 -Do you have any bottled water? -Uh, yeah. 542 00:35:36,301 --> 00:35:38,803 -What the hell is going on here? -Dad, it's cool. Relax. 543 00:35:38,886 --> 00:35:41,431 -What the hell is going on? -Shh! 544 00:35:41,514 --> 00:35:44,600 My girlfriend"s mother just passed out on the street. We wouldn't intrude — 545 00:35:44,684 --> 00:35:46,102 -Who the hell are you? -Excuse me. 546 00:35:46,185 --> 00:35:48,563 Ronnie, do you know any of these people? 547 00:35:48,646 --> 00:35:51,190 -Relax, Dad, all right? Here. -Sit up and drink some water. 548 00:35:51,274 --> 00:35:54,193 -Oh! Oh, my God! -How do you feel? Huh? 549 00:35:54,277 --> 00:35:56,738 I-I'm dizzy. I... 550 00:35:58,406 --> 00:36:01,409 Drink, drink. You need to rehydrate yourself, Rita. There you go. 551 00:36:01,492 --> 00:36:03,911 -She passed out? -[Jo] Yeah. 552 00:36:04,579 --> 00:36:08,166 Uh... Oh, I'm sorry, you know? You caught me by surprise. 553 00:36:08,249 --> 00:36:10,543 You can't be too careful in the city, you know? 554 00:36:10,626 --> 00:36:13,755 You never know what some nut's gonna try and pull off on you, right? 555 00:36:15,840 --> 00:36:18,384 So we decided to stick around and see if she shows up. 556 00:36:18,468 --> 00:36:21,387 I mean, there was nothing else for us to do. 557 00:36:21,471 --> 00:36:24,140 Yeah, well, sure. The book party is not till 6:30, right? 558 00:36:24,223 --> 00:36:26,517 -Right. -So you got hours to Kill. 559 00:36:26,601 --> 00:36:30,772 Exactly. So we decided to all sit in the car 560 00:36:30,855 --> 00:36:33,608 and wait and see who came out of the building. 561 00:36:33,691 --> 00:36:38,154 And we were all freezing to death until Carl here, this sweetheart, 562 00:36:38,237 --> 00:36:43,117 he runs out and he brings us back this really nice gourmet tea. 563 00:36:43,201 --> 00:36:45,411 -What kind of tea was that? -It was a jasmine blend. 564 00:36:45,495 --> 00:36:48,164 So we're waiting and waiting, and finally... 565 00:36:48,247 --> 00:36:49,832 This young woman, 566 00:36:49,916 --> 00:36:52,668 the one in the photograph, comes out of the building. 567 00:36:52,752 --> 00:36:54,170 -[man] Sandy. -[Carl] Mm-hmm. 568 00:36:54,253 --> 00:36:56,381 -With Louis. -No. 569 00:36:57,757 --> 00:36:59,717 Ohh... 570 00:36:59,801 --> 00:37:03,179 Well, that's not definitive proof that something's going on. 571 00:37:03,262 --> 00:37:07,642 Then they get into a cab, and we start following them. 572 00:37:09,394 --> 00:37:12,688 But we got stuck at a traffic light. 573 00:37:12,772 --> 00:37:14,774 -And then? -And then my mom suddenly turns 574 00:37:14,857 --> 00:37:18,611 into Wesley Snipes, jumps out of the car and chases after Louis's cab. 575 00:37:18,694 --> 00:37:20,613 It was great. It was great. 576 00:37:20,696 --> 00:37:23,741 [Rita] That's when I had my fainting spell! 577 00:37:23,825 --> 00:37:25,952 Was that something? 578 00:37:26,035 --> 00:37:28,538 Oh, my God! Oh! 579 00:37:28,621 --> 00:37:31,124 And luckily Carl stepped in, 580 00:37:31,207 --> 00:37:33,709 and he took care of everything. 581 00:37:33,793 --> 00:37:35,420 [man] That was very quick thinking, Carl. 582 00:37:35,503 --> 00:37:38,798 Well, it's what anyone else would've done in that situation. [clears throat] 583 00:37:38,881 --> 00:37:42,427 Oh, stop that. That's nonsense. 584 00:37:42,510 --> 00:37:45,012 This one is so hard on himself. 585 00:37:46,597 --> 00:37:49,183 I'm starving. Whatever happened to lunch, Ronnie? 586 00:37:49,267 --> 00:37:53,229 -I haven't had time to go to the store. -Why don't all of you guys stay for lunch? 587 00:37:53,312 --> 00:37:56,107 -Oh, no, no, Leon. -No. I'm gonna go shopping. 588 00:37:56,190 --> 00:37:59,610 You have already put yourself out for us enough as it is. 589 00:37:59,694 --> 00:38:01,946 And I'd like to make it up to you for being, 590 00:38:02,029 --> 00:38:04,198 you know, a little confused when you came in. 591 00:38:04,282 --> 00:38:07,285 -Come on. Stay for lunch. -That is so sweet of you. 592 00:38:07,368 --> 00:38:09,662 I guess we're hungry. Are you hungry, Carl? 593 00:38:09,745 --> 00:38:12,248 -I'm always hungry. -[Leon] Great. 594 00:38:12,331 --> 00:38:14,417 Ronnie, why don't you run down to the store, 595 00:38:14,500 --> 00:38:17,420 and you get some cold cuts for all of us for lunch? 596 00:38:17,503 --> 00:38:19,005 You know what? 597 00:38:19,088 --> 00:38:23,134 I think maybe I'll make us all some nice, hot soup. 598 00:38:23,217 --> 00:38:26,554 Huh? I'm gonna see what you have in the house. 599 00:38:26,637 --> 00:38:29,515 Are you sure, Rita? Don't you think you should rest or something? 600 00:38:29,599 --> 00:38:32,727 [Rita] No, I'm fine, now that I'm in from the cold. 601 00:38:32,810 --> 00:38:35,396 See, I'm no good in the cold. Thin blood. 602 00:38:35,480 --> 00:38:38,024 For the love of God, don't let her make soup. 603 00:38:39,525 --> 00:38:41,819 [phone rings] 604 00:38:41,903 --> 00:38:43,571 I'll get it. 605 00:38:43,654 --> 00:38:45,448 You kids! 606 00:38:45,531 --> 00:38:49,243 -All you have here is junk food! -Hello? 607 00:38:49,327 --> 00:38:52,038 Chips and soda. That's all they eat, these kids. 608 00:38:52,121 --> 00:38:54,499 Hello, Mom. How are you? Yeah. 609 00:38:54,582 --> 00:38:57,251 -You could use a little, uh — -Shh! Shh! 610 00:38:57,335 --> 00:38:59,879 No, no. That's just one of the guys here that — 611 00:38:59,962 --> 00:39:02,798 They're over here, we're gonna play some basketball. 612 00:39:02,882 --> 00:39:06,052 No. No, I haven't heard from him. Um... 613 00:39:06,135 --> 00:39:08,971 Yeah, of c — Sure, I will. Yeah, of course. You know. 614 00:39:09,055 --> 00:39:10,723 Right, look, let me, uh... 615 00:39:10,806 --> 00:39:13,935 I really got to go, 'cause we're just out the door, so let me... 616 00:39:14,018 --> 00:39:16,270 Yeah. Uh-huh. 617 00:39:16,354 --> 00:39:19,148 Yeah, okay. No, I will. I... 618 00:39:19,232 --> 00:39:21,359 -Bye, bye. -[phone hangs up] 619 00:39:21,442 --> 00:39:24,987 Say, Rita, why don't you make a list and see what we need, 620 00:39:25,071 --> 00:39:27,073 and we'll send a couple kids down to the store. 621 00:39:27,156 --> 00:39:29,575 Oh, that sounds swell, Leon. 622 00:39:31,577 --> 00:39:34,038 Uh, is this romaine lettuce? 623 00:39:34,121 --> 00:39:36,582 -Yeah. -Ah. Lucky guess. 624 00:39:36,666 --> 00:39:38,209 I can never tell. 625 00:39:39,961 --> 00:39:42,421 It's really nice of you and your dad to help us out. 626 00:39:42,505 --> 00:39:44,757 Oh, no problem. 627 00:39:44,840 --> 00:39:47,468 You guys spend a lot of time together? 628 00:39:47,552 --> 00:39:50,680 I don't really have much choice. He's kind of taken over the place. 629 00:39:50,763 --> 00:39:52,932 -Oh. Oh! -Oh, boy. 630 00:39:55,309 --> 00:39:58,729 Thanks. What do you mean, he's taken over? 631 00:40:00,189 --> 00:40:01,816 Well, 632 00:40:01,899 --> 00:40:06,737 my mom and dad, they split up when I was in high school, 633 00:40:06,821 --> 00:40:10,491 he hasn't been so great about paying his alimony and child support. 634 00:40:10,575 --> 00:40:13,703 I have two younger brothers who still live at home, and... 635 00:40:13,786 --> 00:40:17,957 Anyway, uh, he's been so bad about paying his alimony 636 00:40:18,040 --> 00:40:21,335 that there's basically a subpoena out for his arrest, so, uh, 637 00:40:21,419 --> 00:40:24,297 I'm harboring a fugitive at the moment. 638 00:40:24,380 --> 00:40:26,507 [Rita] God, Leon. Kids. 639 00:40:26,591 --> 00:40:30,177 I didn't give birth to my girls till later in life. 640 00:40:30,261 --> 00:40:31,929 I had trouble conceiving. 641 00:40:32,013 --> 00:40:33,973 Novenas, everything. 642 00:40:34,890 --> 00:40:38,102 Eliza, I remember she was a breech birth. 643 00:40:39,103 --> 00:40:41,981 Excruciating. You know what I mean? 644 00:40:42,064 --> 00:40:44,692 And you. You, miss. Ha! 645 00:40:44,775 --> 00:40:47,069 She was a change-of-life baby. 646 00:40:47,153 --> 00:40:49,989 Who knew? What a shock. 647 00:40:50,072 --> 00:40:52,074 Ronnie was sort of a difficult baby, 648 00:40:52,158 --> 00:40:55,995 but, uh, he grew up to be a real quiet kid. 649 00:40:56,078 --> 00:40:57,830 -Real shy. -That's not entirely true. 650 00:40:57,913 --> 00:40:59,832 You remember when you were in the Boy Scouts 651 00:40:59,915 --> 00:41:02,293 and you were elected to go door-to-door to sell raffles? 652 00:41:02,376 --> 00:41:04,503 Do you remember how upset you were? 653 00:41:04,587 --> 00:41:08,090 -Yes, I remember. -So upset I had to go with him. 654 00:41:08,174 --> 00:41:10,885 - I had to do all the talking. -Mom went with me too. 655 00:41:10,968 --> 00:41:12,887 You're not as shy now. 656 00:41:12,970 --> 00:41:16,474 Shy or not, Ronnie saved the day for us today. 657 00:41:16,557 --> 00:41:18,476 He sure did, yeah. 658 00:41:18,559 --> 00:41:20,770 He's a good kid. 659 00:41:20,853 --> 00:41:24,231 I read somewhere the experts were saying that, you know, 660 00:41:24,315 --> 00:41:27,276 shyness should be discouraged in childhood 661 00:41:27,360 --> 00:41:30,196 because it could lead to antisocial behavior. 662 00:41:30,279 --> 00:41:32,448 -I read it in a mag — -[laughing] Oh, please, Mom. 663 00:41:32,531 --> 00:41:34,909 I'm not making this up. Well, I don't know. 664 00:41:34,992 --> 00:41:37,578 I mean, you're not antisocial. 665 00:41:37,662 --> 00:41:39,622 Sometimes I am. 666 00:41:39,705 --> 00:41:41,332 We all are. 667 00:41:42,958 --> 00:41:44,251 Sometimes. 668 00:41:44,335 --> 00:41:47,129 You know, I've been pretty antisocial of late, 669 00:41:47,213 --> 00:41:50,716 but it's really great to have surprise guests here. 670 00:41:50,800 --> 00:41:54,095 Uh, say, would anyone want some more wine or anything? 671 00:41:54,178 --> 00:41:55,513 Thank you. 672 00:41:57,515 --> 00:41:59,016 Ronnie, what do you do? 673 00:41:59,100 --> 00:42:02,395 Um, I'm in my second year of business school, 674 00:42:02,478 --> 00:42:04,355 graduate business school at Columbia. 675 00:42:04,438 --> 00:42:06,982 Oh, that's good. Very good. 676 00:42:07,066 --> 00:42:10,152 You seem like a very nice young man, Ronnie. 677 00:42:10,236 --> 00:42:12,988 -[Jim] And smart too. -[Leon] He's a real nice kid. 678 00:42:13,072 --> 00:42:16,575 You know, I've been traveling a lot lately for the last couple of years, 679 00:42:16,659 --> 00:42:19,912 so I figured I'd come up here and spend some time and visit the kid, 680 00:42:19,995 --> 00:42:22,123 and, uh, we've been having fun. 681 00:42:22,206 --> 00:42:24,792 [Rita] Ah! 682 00:42:24,875 --> 00:42:28,337 -Um, what do you do, Eliza? -I teach fourth grade. 683 00:42:28,421 --> 00:42:31,465 It's hard, but, uh, I really love the kids, so... 684 00:42:31,549 --> 00:42:33,926 -Do you have any kids of your own? -Not yet. 685 00:42:34,009 --> 00:42:37,513 Oh, that's good, you know? I'm — Uh... 686 00:42:37,596 --> 00:42:40,307 Could be messy, uh... 687 00:42:41,308 --> 00:42:43,060 You know, uh... 688 00:42:43,144 --> 00:42:45,730 -Oh. Oh, my God. -What? What? 689 00:42:45,813 --> 00:42:48,399 -I've got this excruciating pain. -What? What? 690 00:42:48,482 --> 00:42:50,484 Arthritis. 691 00:42:50,568 --> 00:42:52,611 -[groans] -You want some aspirin or... 692 00:42:52,695 --> 00:42:55,322 I had bursitis. I used to be a tennis pro. 693 00:42:55,406 --> 00:42:59,076 I had bursitis so bad in my shoulder I had to quit playing tennis. 694 00:42:59,160 --> 00:43:02,955 This is worse. This is my cross to bear. Oh, God. 695 00:43:03,038 --> 00:43:04,832 It's brutal, right? 696 00:43:04,915 --> 00:43:07,501 You know, Rita, I know a shiatsu pressure-point thing 697 00:43:07,585 --> 00:43:09,253 for your fingers there, if you'd like. 698 00:43:09,336 --> 00:43:11,839 -Really? -Yeah. Here, let me show you. 699 00:43:11,922 --> 00:43:16,051 You find the pressure points and then come up along the knuckles like this, see? 700 00:43:16,135 --> 00:43:17,887 -[Rita] Ah! -[Jim] Does that feel good? 701 00:43:17,970 --> 00:43:21,015 It works. See that? 702 00:43:24,393 --> 00:43:27,563 -Carl's plucking my nerves. -How come? 703 00:43:27,646 --> 00:43:30,816 The way he dotes on Mom is making me a little sick. 704 00:43:30,900 --> 00:43:33,068 Yeah, well, Mom better chill. 705 00:43:33,152 --> 00:43:35,237 She's starting to give me a little headache. 706 00:43:36,280 --> 00:43:37,865 You want some more wine, Rita? 707 00:43:37,948 --> 00:43:40,493 Oh, my God. I shouldn't. 708 00:43:40,576 --> 00:43:43,204 -Come on. -All right. Thank you. 709 00:43:43,287 --> 00:43:46,707 Oh, my God. Carl. 710 00:43:46,791 --> 00:43:50,628 -So, um, what's next for you, Leon? -I have a few options right now. 711 00:43:50,711 --> 00:43:54,757 I have a friend of mine in Miami, Florida, you know, in South Beach. 712 00:43:54,840 --> 00:43:57,802 He wants me to come down and manage his nightclub. 713 00:43:57,885 --> 00:44:01,138 It's a real swanky place. Magicians, singers. 714 00:44:01,222 --> 00:44:04,016 So I'm just tossing around different options. 715 00:44:07,561 --> 00:44:09,814 -Jo, you're a lovely young lady. -Thank you so much. 716 00:44:09,897 --> 00:44:12,399 -All the best to you. -Oh, great. Nice meeting you, Robert. 717 00:44:12,483 --> 00:44:14,860 -Carl, good luck to you with your book. -Thank you. 718 00:44:14,944 --> 00:44:17,780 Rita, you stay out of the cold, you hear? 719 00:44:17,863 --> 00:44:20,616 Oh, Leon, what a generous man. 720 00:44:20,699 --> 00:44:23,494 -Jim, it's been a pleasure. -Leon, you're the best. 721 00:44:23,577 --> 00:44:25,538 Thank you. Eliza... 722 00:44:27,039 --> 00:44:30,000 You have your family. They can help you. 723 00:44:30,084 --> 00:44:31,710 -Your family. -Thanks, Leon. 724 00:44:45,307 --> 00:44:49,144 Wasn't Leon a nice guy? Salt of the earth, you know? 725 00:44:50,354 --> 00:44:54,191 Yeah, but that telephone incident. 726 00:44:54,275 --> 00:44:55,818 That was very odd. 727 00:44:55,901 --> 00:44:57,570 Gave me the willies. 728 00:44:57,653 --> 00:45:00,322 Oh, come on. I'm sure there was some reasonable explanation. 729 00:45:00,406 --> 00:45:03,951 -It wasn't any of our business. -Oh, you're probably right, Carl. 730 00:45:04,034 --> 00:45:06,078 So, should I continue with my novel? 731 00:45:06,161 --> 00:45:09,373 [Rita] Oh, yes. So dog man 732 00:45:09,456 --> 00:45:12,877 is in the hospital because of the mail bomb. 733 00:45:12,960 --> 00:45:16,338 Right, and there's this team of surgeons working around the clock, trying — 734 00:45:16,422 --> 00:45:18,716 I'm sorry to interrupt. Does this dog have a name? 735 00:45:18,799 --> 00:45:20,092 Fido. 736 00:45:21,176 --> 00:45:22,887 That was hostile. 737 00:45:22,970 --> 00:45:25,097 I was kidding. I was kidding. 738 00:45:26,473 --> 00:45:28,851 His name's Noah, like in the Bible. 739 00:45:29,852 --> 00:45:34,231 So Noah survives the operation 740 00:45:34,315 --> 00:45:35,649 but loses his hands. 741 00:45:35,733 --> 00:45:39,028 Ah. So he's a man 742 00:45:39,111 --> 00:45:42,448 with a dog's head and no hands. 743 00:45:42,531 --> 00:45:44,033 Exactly. 744 00:45:44,116 --> 00:45:46,952 A pointer who can't point. 745 00:45:47,953 --> 00:45:49,038 Huh? 746 00:46:05,888 --> 00:46:07,181 We're here. 747 00:46:08,599 --> 00:46:10,601 Who's going in? 748 00:46:11,644 --> 00:46:15,064 I don't want to go in. I don't want to do this in front of Louis's coworkers. 749 00:46:15,147 --> 00:46:16,982 Jo and I could see if he's there. 750 00:46:17,066 --> 00:46:20,569 -You mind, Miss Malone? -No, I'd love a mint julep right now. 751 00:46:20,653 --> 00:46:22,446 Let's go. 752 00:46:23,447 --> 00:46:25,115 [Jo] I'm so hungry. 753 00:46:26,241 --> 00:46:28,369 I couldn't take Mother's soup. 754 00:46:28,452 --> 00:46:32,414 It was disgusting. This coat smells. This coat smells. 755 00:46:32,498 --> 00:46:35,960 I feel like I'm turning into Grandpa, Carl. 756 00:46:36,043 --> 00:46:38,462 Ah, gross! 757 00:46:38,545 --> 00:46:40,756 I hope Norman Mailer isn't here. 758 00:46:40,839 --> 00:46:42,257 -Jo? -Huh? 759 00:46:42,341 --> 00:46:44,927 -What are you doing? - I just want to look nice. 760 00:46:52,601 --> 00:46:54,853 You really think Norman Mailer will be here? 761 00:46:55,896 --> 00:46:57,648 [music playing] 762 00:46:57,731 --> 00:47:00,025 [woman] Yes, the book is a fiction, 763 00:47:00,109 --> 00:47:04,655 but I propose it is informed by my relationship with my stepfather. 764 00:47:04,738 --> 00:47:08,242 He was sort of a cross between a Fred MacMurray and a Pol Pot. 765 00:47:08,325 --> 00:47:11,870 Now, that is quite a polarity, and it was quite a challenge... 766 00:47:11,954 --> 00:47:13,956 We need to open another bottle of vodka. 767 00:47:14,039 --> 00:47:17,626 It seems that you've put most of the last bottle in your mouth. 768 00:47:17,710 --> 00:47:19,086 -Thank you. -[door opens] 769 00:47:19,169 --> 00:47:21,171 Oh, oh. People coming in. People coming in. 770 00:47:24,466 --> 00:47:27,803 Hi. I'm Aaron from Cordelia Press. And you are? 771 00:47:27,886 --> 00:47:30,514 I'm Jo. I'm Jo. I'm Louis D'Amico sister-in-law. 772 00:47:30,597 --> 00:47:33,225 -We're looking for Louis. Is he here yet? -Oh, no, he's not, 773 00:47:33,308 --> 00:47:36,186 but put your coats in there and then help yourself to a drink. 774 00:47:36,270 --> 00:47:38,355 -I certainly am. -Thanks. 775 00:47:43,485 --> 00:47:45,487 [indistinct conversations] 776 00:47:56,915 --> 00:47:59,084 -Louis isn't here yet. -Louis isn't here yet. 777 00:47:59,168 --> 00:48:01,170 I heard him. 778 00:48:01,253 --> 00:48:04,256 -Do you want us to wait for him upstairs? -All right, dear. 779 00:48:07,051 --> 00:48:08,719 -She was a thief? -Yeah. 780 00:48:08,802 --> 00:48:11,513 But, you know, I'd like to see her again. 781 00:48:11,597 --> 00:48:13,182 -Really? -Yeah. I mean, you know, 782 00:48:13,265 --> 00:48:15,768 if she wouldn't have a second date with me, I'd like to, 783 00:48:15,851 --> 00:48:17,895 I don't know, have her arrested. 784 00:48:17,978 --> 00:48:21,899 Aaron, I'd like you to perform a task that's vaguely associated with your job. 785 00:48:21,982 --> 00:48:23,942 Excuse us. 786 00:48:24,026 --> 00:48:26,528 Hi. Did I... Are you Louis D'Amico's sister-in-law? 787 00:48:26,612 --> 00:48:28,238 -Yes, yes. -I thought, uh... 788 00:48:28,322 --> 00:48:30,491 -I'm Jo. -I'm Eddie. How are ya? I work with Louis. 789 00:48:30,574 --> 00:48:31,950 Really? What do you do? 790 00:48:32,034 --> 00:48:34,620 Actually, Cordelia Press is publishing my novel. 791 00:48:34,703 --> 00:48:38,415 Wow, that's great. Congratulations. Are they doing a good job? 792 00:48:38,499 --> 00:48:41,585 Well, they're desperately trying to come up with a publicity campaign 793 00:48:41,668 --> 00:48:43,712 to make it sexy to the public. 794 00:48:43,796 --> 00:48:46,799 It's kind of like trying to make salt sexy to a slug. 795 00:48:47,925 --> 00:48:51,512 So was Aaron telling you about his little liaison with the criminal element? 796 00:48:51,595 --> 00:48:53,180 God, yeah, he was. 797 00:48:53,263 --> 00:48:55,766 I thought it was kind of weird. Don't you think weird 798 00:48:55,849 --> 00:48:59,186 when people you don't know start talking about their sexual exploits? 799 00:48:59,269 --> 00:49:00,979 It's just... You know? 800 00:49:02,773 --> 00:49:05,109 -Can I ask you something? -Sure. 801 00:49:06,819 --> 00:49:08,987 What do you think of Louis D'Amico? 802 00:49:10,405 --> 00:49:12,699 I don't know. What do you think about Louis D'Amico? 803 00:49:12,783 --> 00:49:14,827 I don't know. 804 00:49:14,910 --> 00:49:16,662 Carl, Eddie. Eddie, Carl. 805 00:49:16,745 --> 00:49:20,040 Eddie's having his novel published by Louis's company. 806 00:49:20,124 --> 00:49:22,334 You are? Wow, that's impressive. 807 00:49:22,417 --> 00:49:25,212 I guess Jo told you I'm finishing up a novel myself. 808 00:49:25,295 --> 00:49:26,922 No. Really? 809 00:49:27,005 --> 00:49:29,842 Yeah, yeah. I hate to talk about it though. 810 00:49:29,925 --> 00:49:33,262 - Know what you mean. - I have to find a bathroom. 811 00:49:33,345 --> 00:49:36,181 God, you have the smallest bladder on this planet. 812 00:49:36,265 --> 00:49:37,850 -Jeez. -[chuckles] 813 00:49:49,444 --> 00:49:50,696 -Jo. Jo. -What? 814 00:49:50,779 --> 00:49:52,656 -You're not gonna believe who's here. -Who? 815 00:49:52,739 --> 00:49:54,616 -Nick. Nick Woodman. -Who? 816 00:49:54,700 --> 00:49:58,328 Nick. The most important man in my life. I told you all about him. 817 00:49:58,412 --> 00:50:00,998 You know, my writing teacher that semester I spent at Cambridge. 818 00:50:01,081 --> 00:50:04,918 I want you to meet him. Uh, brilliant, brilliant writer. 819 00:50:05,002 --> 00:50:07,379 No, wait. I'll get him back. 820 00:50:10,048 --> 00:50:12,092 Well, I'm just gonna do the book tour... 821 00:50:13,468 --> 00:50:14,553 Nick! 822 00:50:15,387 --> 00:50:16,680 Nick? 823 00:50:18,473 --> 00:50:19,600 Nick? 824 00:50:19,683 --> 00:50:22,102 Hi, it's Carl from, uh, the... 825 00:50:23,061 --> 00:50:24,188 Shit. 826 00:50:27,441 --> 00:50:29,109 Nick! Nick! 827 00:50:29,193 --> 00:50:30,360 Wait, Nick! 828 00:50:32,237 --> 00:50:33,947 Nick! Wait, Nick. 829 00:50:34,031 --> 00:50:37,117 Hey, it's Carl. Carl Petrovich. 830 00:51:05,646 --> 00:51:09,149 Carl thinks that democracy is the reason why the middle class is so mediocre, 831 00:51:09,233 --> 00:51:11,985 that it just naturally tends toward the middle, toward mediocrity. 832 00:51:12,069 --> 00:51:14,321 -What is he, a communist? -No, no. 833 00:51:14,404 --> 00:51:17,532 He thinks that communism is totally unrealistic 834 00:51:17,616 --> 00:51:20,160 in the cravenness of human nature. 835 00:51:20,244 --> 00:51:23,622 [Eddie] Then what does Carl propose instead of a democracy? 836 00:51:23,705 --> 00:51:26,333 [Jo] He thinks we should live in an aristocracy. 837 00:51:26,416 --> 00:51:28,043 -[Eddie] What? -Yeah. 838 00:51:28,126 --> 00:51:30,796 Carl, I was just telling Eddie what we were talking about today 839 00:51:30,879 --> 00:51:32,130 about aristocracies. 840 00:51:32,214 --> 00:51:34,341 -Oh, yeah? -Where's your teacher? 841 00:51:34,424 --> 00:51:36,301 -Hmm? -Where's your teacher? 842 00:51:36,385 --> 00:51:40,305 Oh, uh, he had to be somewhere. He, uh, told me to give him a ring 843 00:51:40,389 --> 00:51:42,349 before he left town. [clears throat] 844 00:51:42,432 --> 00:51:45,769 -So what were you guys talking about? -Jo was saying that you, uh, 845 00:51:45,852 --> 00:51:49,064 think an aristocracy is preferable to a democracy. 846 00:51:50,315 --> 00:51:52,985 Well, if it were led by a-a cultured 847 00:51:53,068 --> 00:51:55,654 and enlightened ruling class, yes, I do. 848 00:51:55,737 --> 00:51:58,907 I see. What about the poor people? 849 00:51:58,991 --> 00:52:01,743 -That's what I asked. -They could work. 850 00:52:01,827 --> 00:52:04,871 Work has dignity, and there's value in work. 851 00:52:04,955 --> 00:52:09,167 Would the common folk like to give up the vote? 852 00:52:09,251 --> 00:52:10,752 [chuckles] Oh, come on. 853 00:52:10,836 --> 00:52:14,339 You don't really think the vote has any bearing on social change, do you? 854 00:52:14,423 --> 00:52:16,883 Of course it doesn't. Republican, Democrat, it doesn't matter. 855 00:52:16,967 --> 00:52:19,094 They all think like managers. 856 00:52:19,177 --> 00:52:21,847 As far as I'm concerned, Bush and Clinton are interchangeable. 857 00:52:21,930 --> 00:52:25,726 They have no code of honor. At least the aristocracy had a... 858 00:52:25,809 --> 00:52:29,479 [clears throat] a sense of, uh... you know, a code of honor. 859 00:52:29,563 --> 00:52:32,691 I think you might be overestimating the ideals of aristocrats, Carl. 860 00:52:32,774 --> 00:52:35,736 -Oh, good point. -And your take on politicians seems 861 00:52:35,819 --> 00:52:38,697 simplistically cynical, even to me. 862 00:52:38,780 --> 00:52:41,992 I wouldn't say cynical. Pragmatic, maybe. Cynical seems... 863 00:52:42,075 --> 00:52:45,120 Longing for a return of the Borgias hardly sounds pragmatic. 864 00:52:45,203 --> 00:52:48,332 So what, we should just accept everything and not question the system 865 00:52:48,415 --> 00:52:50,167 like a — like a bunch of sheep? 866 00:52:50,250 --> 00:52:52,294 No, but it's ludicrous snobbery to think that 867 00:52:52,377 --> 00:52:54,629 the brilliant and cultured can be up here 868 00:52:54,713 --> 00:52:57,674 and the dumb workers down here but dignity all around. 869 00:52:57,758 --> 00:53:00,177 I'm sorry. Look, I'm-I'm, uh, 870 00:53:00,260 --> 00:53:03,305 not really in the mood for a political argument right now. 871 00:53:03,388 --> 00:53:05,682 But, Carl, do you really think it makes no difference 872 00:53:05,766 --> 00:53:08,769 whether there's a Republican or Democrat in office? 873 00:53:10,062 --> 00:53:12,939 I don't really think he needs any help arguing his side. 874 00:53:13,023 --> 00:53:15,025 I was asking that question myself. 875 00:53:15,108 --> 00:53:17,319 I was stating, like, my opinion and what I thought. 876 00:53:17,402 --> 00:53:19,696 I'm sorry. Forget it. Whoa, whoa. Forget it, forget it. Sorry. 877 00:53:19,780 --> 00:53:22,282 It's me. I'm a little drunk. Sorry. 878 00:53:23,575 --> 00:53:26,495 But there's one thing. There is a lot of mediocrity in the world, 879 00:53:26,578 --> 00:53:29,331 that's a given, but, uh, 880 00:53:29,414 --> 00:53:32,459 if you're a real writer, you have a choice. 881 00:53:32,542 --> 00:53:35,170 You can whine about it or you can struggle against it. 882 00:53:35,253 --> 00:53:38,632 That's where the best writing comes from — struggling against 883 00:53:38,715 --> 00:53:42,177 your society, your conscience, your appetites. 884 00:53:42,260 --> 00:53:46,014 Frankly, I don't know if what I feel will mean anything 885 00:53:46,098 --> 00:53:48,809 to an indifferent middle-class consumer society, 886 00:53:48,892 --> 00:53:51,853 because, you know, I... I don't feel like one of them. 887 00:53:51,937 --> 00:53:53,105 Excuse me. 888 00:54:06,034 --> 00:54:08,912 Everybody, I just wanted to make sure you got a chance to meet 889 00:54:08,995 --> 00:54:12,249 our guest of honor, Amy Corinne Fairbright-Lebow. 890 00:54:12,332 --> 00:54:14,543 -[applause] -Thank you, Chap. 891 00:54:16,169 --> 00:54:19,005 Hi. Um, I'm sort of nervous. 892 00:54:19,089 --> 00:54:22,717 Um, thank you everyone for coming. 893 00:54:22,801 --> 00:54:26,096 Uh, anyway, I must confess I find it odd 894 00:54:26,179 --> 00:54:30,475 to be experiencing such feelings of joy in association with a book 895 00:54:30,559 --> 00:54:35,814 that is principally a devastating account of spiritual asphyxiation. 896 00:54:35,897 --> 00:54:38,567 So with that in mind, um, 897 00:54:38,650 --> 00:54:41,987 I'd like to read a selection of journal entries, 898 00:54:42,070 --> 00:54:43,989 um, from the year 1976. 899 00:54:45,449 --> 00:54:47,993 Where the hell is that husband of yours? 900 00:54:48,076 --> 00:54:50,328 We can't sit here and freeze to death. 901 00:54:50,412 --> 00:54:52,539 Let's go find a restaurant, some place warm. 902 00:54:52,622 --> 00:54:55,167 We'll leave a note on the car for Jo. 903 00:54:55,250 --> 00:54:57,419 Don't be stupid. 904 00:54:57,502 --> 00:55:01,506 By the time we find a place and leave a note on the car, they'll be back down. 905 00:55:01,590 --> 00:55:03,842 Why didn't you think of this an hour ago? 906 00:55:05,385 --> 00:55:07,137 Where the hell is he going? 907 00:55:08,638 --> 00:55:10,474 [sighs] 908 00:55:11,391 --> 00:55:14,186 -What, are you gonna leave me here? -I'll be right back. 909 00:55:14,269 --> 00:55:16,146 Tell your father to get back here! 910 00:55:49,513 --> 00:55:52,849 [woman] Will you hand me that bag? That's the last thing. 911 00:55:52,933 --> 00:55:55,727 But be careful. It's Waterford crystal. 912 00:55:55,810 --> 00:55:57,812 -Here we go. -Thanks. 913 00:55:58,939 --> 00:56:02,400 -Hiya, Dad. -Oh, hi, kid. 914 00:56:02,484 --> 00:56:04,277 This is my daughter, Eliza. 915 00:56:04,361 --> 00:56:05,695 -Hi. -Hi. 916 00:56:05,779 --> 00:56:08,657 Listen, I hope you're not gonna leave any of this stuff unattended. 917 00:56:08,740 --> 00:56:12,702 -Somebody might steal it. -Oh, listen, I'm leaving as soon as I can. 918 00:56:12,786 --> 00:56:15,288 Actually, you could help me. 919 00:56:15,372 --> 00:56:17,874 There's something upstairs that's very heavy I have to move. 920 00:56:17,958 --> 00:56:19,793 I could use a couple of extra hands. 921 00:56:19,876 --> 00:56:22,045 Honest to God, it would only take a minute. 922 00:56:22,128 --> 00:56:24,839 -Sure! -No, let me help you. He has a bad back. 923 00:56:24,923 --> 00:56:27,968 -Ah, my back isn't so bad. -You stay and watch the car. I'll help. 924 00:56:28,051 --> 00:56:31,555 All right, but you better watch your back, especially with your occupation. 925 00:56:31,638 --> 00:56:34,849 She's a human fly. Climbs skyscrapers. 926 00:56:36,726 --> 00:56:38,353 He's kidding. 927 00:56:38,436 --> 00:56:39,813 Oh. 928 00:56:39,896 --> 00:56:41,731 Well, this'll only take a minute. 929 00:56:42,941 --> 00:56:43,984 Follow me. 930 00:56:49,155 --> 00:56:52,909 Dad, thanks for driving us around all day. 931 00:56:52,993 --> 00:56:54,452 Sure, Kid. 932 00:56:56,830 --> 00:56:58,248 You coming? 933 00:56:58,331 --> 00:57:00,000 You got another one. 934 00:57:01,876 --> 00:57:05,589 It's not just the elevator. The whole building smells like rat poison. 935 00:57:06,590 --> 00:57:10,218 My mother died. My sister and I are, uh, 936 00:57:10,302 --> 00:57:11,928 cleaning out the apartment. 937 00:57:12,012 --> 00:57:13,638 Oh, I'm sorry. 938 00:57:13,722 --> 00:57:18,184 Well, would've been so much easier if she'd bothered to write a will. 939 00:57:23,023 --> 00:57:24,065 Hello. 940 00:57:24,149 --> 00:57:26,443 This is Eliza. She's gonna help me move something. 941 00:57:26,526 --> 00:57:29,154 Hello. I'm so sorry to hear about your mother. 942 00:57:29,237 --> 00:57:31,573 Oh, thanks, sweetheart. 943 00:57:31,656 --> 00:57:34,576 She lasted much longer than any of the doctors thought she would. 944 00:57:34,659 --> 00:57:37,954 -What is this? -It's the Chevalier barometer. 945 00:57:38,038 --> 00:57:41,791 Our mom worked as a maid in the Astoria Hotel, 946 00:57:41,875 --> 00:57:44,628 and Maurice Chevalier gave her this. 947 00:57:44,711 --> 00:57:48,048 -I wonder how much we can get for it. -Doris, we can't sell this. 948 00:57:48,131 --> 00:57:49,424 What's all this? 949 00:57:49,507 --> 00:57:52,385 It's Mom's medication. I cleaned out the medicine cabinet. 950 00:57:52,469 --> 00:57:54,179 Well, let's split it up. 951 00:57:54,262 --> 00:57:55,805 [sister] Okay. 952 00:57:57,807 --> 00:57:59,601 This is ampicillin. 953 00:57:59,684 --> 00:58:02,312 I could use some of that. I'm always getting sick in the winter. 954 00:58:02,395 --> 00:58:06,399 Excuse me. Can I use your telephone? I need to call my answering machine. 955 00:58:06,483 --> 00:58:09,152 Well, the plug's over there. Just follow the cord. 956 00:58:09,235 --> 00:58:12,614 [Doris] I have a small TV. I would like one like Mom's. 957 00:58:12,697 --> 00:58:16,785 Now, you've already got the stereo, and you've got all the records. 958 00:58:16,868 --> 00:58:20,080 Well, that's because you weren't interested in any of those things. 959 00:58:20,163 --> 00:58:23,291 In other words, you should get whatever you want and I should get nothing. 960 00:58:23,375 --> 00:58:26,795 [sister] You took extra pills. I'm gonna take this Tylenol with codeine. 961 00:58:26,878 --> 00:58:29,964 [Doris] No, you are not. We are splitting the Tylenol with codeine. 962 00:58:30,048 --> 00:58:33,510 -I'm gonna take these sleeping pills. -No. We'll split those too. 963 00:58:33,593 --> 00:58:35,345 What do you need sleeping pills for? 964 00:58:35,428 --> 00:58:37,639 Well, it's very hard to sleep in the city. 965 00:58:37,722 --> 00:58:38,973 All that noise? 966 00:58:39,057 --> 00:58:42,227 You do not take sleeping pills because there's some noise in the city. 967 00:58:42,310 --> 00:58:45,605 You take sleeping pills if you have a serious sleep disorder. 968 00:58:45,689 --> 00:58:49,275 Okay. Oh, my God. I've completely lost count. 969 00:58:49,359 --> 00:58:52,070 I don't know if this is your pill or it's my pill. 970 00:58:52,153 --> 00:58:54,364 You give me those. 971 00:58:54,447 --> 00:58:56,074 Tylenol with codeine. 972 00:58:57,450 --> 00:58:59,160 Amoxicillin. 973 00:58:59,244 --> 00:59:02,247 -Oh, my God! -Valium. Oh! 974 00:59:03,248 --> 00:59:06,334 Doesn't she look just like Carol Anne? 975 00:59:08,253 --> 00:59:09,963 My God! 976 00:59:10,046 --> 00:59:12,382 She was our favorite cousin. 977 00:59:12,465 --> 00:59:15,093 She wore her hair like this. 978 00:59:21,224 --> 00:59:25,520 I really have to go. My dad is waiting for me downstairs. 979 00:59:25,603 --> 00:59:28,940 [Doris] Look, I need that young woman to help me move the television. 980 00:59:29,023 --> 00:59:33,278 That's the only thing I want, so I think I should really have it. 981 00:59:33,361 --> 00:59:36,072 -Then I want the silver. -Fine. 982 00:59:36,156 --> 00:59:39,242 My sister — she wonders why I never come to visit her. 983 00:59:39,325 --> 00:59:41,077 -Isn't it obvious? Look at her? -[buzzing] 984 00:59:41,161 --> 00:59:44,831 It's depressing to be around somebody like that. She's like a child. 985 00:59:44,914 --> 00:59:46,958 Well, she's your sister. 986 00:59:47,041 --> 00:59:50,462 So what? Just because she happens to be my sister? 987 00:59:50,545 --> 00:59:52,964 She might as well be somebody I met in an elevator. 988 00:59:53,047 --> 00:59:55,091 There's the elevator. 989 00:59:55,175 --> 00:59:56,885 Look out! [exclaims] 990 00:59:58,219 --> 01:00:00,430 -We need to back around. -Look out! 991 01:00:00,513 --> 01:00:02,599 I'm not carrying your weight here. 992 01:00:03,933 --> 01:00:07,020 Ouch! I hurt my hand. Can you get that button? 993 01:00:07,103 --> 01:00:09,189 [continues, indistinct] 994 01:00:10,356 --> 01:00:13,151 -Where the hell have you been? -We caught a double feature. 995 01:00:13,234 --> 01:00:16,321 -Ha, ha. Louis never showed. -What? 996 01:00:16,404 --> 01:00:19,032 The book party is breaking up, and Louis didn't show. 997 01:00:19,115 --> 01:00:21,242 Can you believe this? Where the hell is he? 998 01:00:21,326 --> 01:00:23,411 Maybe I should call the machine again. 999 01:00:23,495 --> 01:00:25,121 Oh, why the hell not? 1000 01:00:30,293 --> 01:00:33,838 Shit. I left my bag inside the party. 1001 01:00:33,922 --> 01:00:36,090 -I'll go get it. -No, I'll get it. 1002 01:00:36,174 --> 01:00:38,468 It's not a problem. I'll get the bag, Jo. 1003 01:00:38,551 --> 01:00:41,763 You don't have to do everything for everybody, Carl. 1004 01:00:41,846 --> 01:00:43,598 I don't do everything for everybody. 1005 01:00:43,681 --> 01:00:46,434 You just take a very long time doing certain things. 1006 01:00:46,518 --> 01:00:49,187 Well, I promise I won't take a very long time. 1007 01:00:54,484 --> 01:00:56,444 And she was sexy, you know, 1008 01:00:56,528 --> 01:00:58,738 in a Ruben-esque kind of way, right? 1009 01:00:58,822 --> 01:01:01,783 And right off the bat, she starts talking to me about sex. 1010 01:01:01,866 --> 01:01:06,120 About screwing her roommate's boyfriend in the entryway to her apartment building, 1011 01:01:06,204 --> 01:01:08,957 seducing the cable guy... [continues, indistinct] 1012 01:01:14,838 --> 01:01:16,339 [Eddie] Hey. 1013 01:01:17,632 --> 01:01:20,301 -Is this yours? -Yeah. Thanks. 1014 01:01:20,385 --> 01:01:23,555 Uh, I'm glad I got to say good-bye. 1015 01:01:23,638 --> 01:01:26,683 Have you seen the view from the bedroom? It's really worth seeing. 1016 01:01:26,766 --> 01:01:29,769 -No, I just have to — -Come on. It'll just take a second. 1017 01:01:31,646 --> 01:01:33,648 -There's no view. -Yeah, whatever. 1018 01:01:52,375 --> 01:01:54,711 [chuckles] I gotta go. 1019 01:01:54,794 --> 01:01:57,297 Yeah, I gotta go. I'm sorry. 1020 01:01:57,380 --> 01:01:58,506 M'kay. 1021 01:02:03,970 --> 01:02:05,430 -Found it. -Great. 1022 01:02:05,513 --> 01:02:07,390 So, you been around the block, right? 1023 01:02:09,350 --> 01:02:10,643 Okay, good night. 1024 01:02:10,727 --> 01:02:13,229 Well, um, do — 1025 01:02:13,313 --> 01:02:15,106 Look in your address book, under T. 1026 01:02:17,525 --> 01:02:19,110 -Good night. -Good night. 1027 01:02:29,996 --> 01:02:32,665 [Louis on recording] Hi, honey. It's me. Can you pick up? Hello? 1028 01:02:32,749 --> 01:02:34,834 Eliza? 1029 01:02:34,918 --> 01:02:37,295 Where are you? 1030 01:02:37,378 --> 01:02:41,466 Well, I'm calling to say this book party's going a little later than I thought, 1031 01:02:41,549 --> 01:02:45,553 and then Chap wants me to come out to dinner with the author. 1032 01:02:45,637 --> 01:02:47,555 I think I'm gonna be a little /ate. 1033 01:02:47,639 --> 01:02:51,601 In fact, what I might do is stay in Chap's guest room If this goes foo late. 1034 01:02:51,684 --> 01:02:54,354 But uh, I don't know. 1035 01:02:54,437 --> 01:02:57,106 Uh, I'll call you back in an hour or two. 1036 01:02:57,190 --> 01:02:58,942 Okay? Okay. Bye. 1037 01:04:10,221 --> 01:04:12,265 Do you want me to come with you? 1038 01:04:15,727 --> 01:04:17,145 No, I'll go alone. 1039 01:04:29,741 --> 01:04:31,284 [rings] 1040 01:04:36,497 --> 01:04:38,416 [buzzes] 1041 01:04:41,377 --> 01:04:43,129 [rings] 1042 01:04:44,213 --> 01:04:46,507 Hello? 1043 01:04:46,591 --> 01:04:48,843 [man] Yeah, come on up! 1044 01:04:48,926 --> 01:04:51,804 [buzzing] 1045 01:05:03,983 --> 01:05:05,985 [rock music playing] 1046 01:05:29,884 --> 01:05:32,470 ♪ The things that I used to do ♪ 1047 01:05:32,553 --> 01:05:35,431 ♪ Never do them no more, baby ♪ 1048 01:05:38,434 --> 01:05:41,687 ♪ Yeah, the things that I used to do ♪ 1049 01:05:42,563 --> 01:05:45,399 ♪ Yeah, I ain't never gonna do them ♪ 1050 01:05:45,483 --> 01:05:47,110 ♪ No more ♪ 1051 01:05:48,444 --> 01:05:52,156 Are you Sandy's friend? Have we met? Did you go to Vassar? 1052 01:05:52,240 --> 01:05:54,826 -No. -Oh. Do you take yoga on 10th? 1053 01:05:54,909 --> 01:05:58,329 -No. -Do you want a drink? I'm drinking gin. 1054 01:05:58,412 --> 01:06:01,833 In fact, I wanted to fill the whole bathtub with gin, 1055 01:06:01,916 --> 01:06:04,585 but the health-conscious contingent got here first 1056 01:06:04,669 --> 01:06:06,337 and filled it with hummus. 1057 01:06:06,420 --> 01:06:08,631 [chuckles] Just kidding. 1058 01:06:08,714 --> 01:06:11,384 Here. Drink up. 1059 01:06:11,467 --> 01:06:15,805 There. You seem a little bit nervous, jumpy. 1060 01:06:15,888 --> 01:06:18,391 What's the matter? Some guy here you like? 1061 01:06:19,559 --> 01:06:22,353 There's a guy here I like. I like him a lot. 1062 01:06:22,436 --> 01:06:25,690 See that guy? We went out for three and a half years. 1063 01:06:25,773 --> 01:06:28,067 If he tries to pick you up, I say go for it. 1064 01:06:28,151 --> 01:06:31,237 He's a real stand-up gent. 1065 01:06:31,320 --> 01:06:33,865 And awfully good in the sack too. [chuckles] 1066 01:06:33,948 --> 01:06:37,034 My only complaint with him is his tiny 1067 01:06:37,118 --> 01:06:39,036 "falling out of love" problem. 1068 01:06:41,164 --> 01:06:43,291 It's odd, but one might think that 1069 01:06:43,374 --> 01:06:45,710 my seeing him here for the first time 1070 01:06:45,793 --> 01:06:49,213 in, oh, roughly 1071 01:06:49,297 --> 01:06:51,549 11 months and 19 days, 1072 01:06:51,632 --> 01:06:55,052 that might have something do do with my drinking more gin and tonics 1073 01:06:55,136 --> 01:06:58,431 than a boat full of WASPs at a Hyannis Port regatta. 1074 01:06:58,514 --> 01:07:00,683 [chuckles] 1075 01:07:00,766 --> 01:07:03,895 That's a really cute dress you're wearing. It's really adorable. 1076 01:07:06,022 --> 01:07:08,482 Uh, so, do you know Sandy? 1077 01:07:08,566 --> 01:07:10,401 -What? -[shouts] Do you know Sand — 1078 01:07:11,777 --> 01:07:14,197 -Do you know Sandy? -Oh, no, no. 1079 01:07:14,280 --> 01:07:18,492 Um, I don't really know anybody here. I was meeting some friends — 1080 01:07:18,576 --> 01:07:20,745 Well, don't leave me. 1081 01:07:26,792 --> 01:07:28,586 I'm gonna call the machine. 1082 01:07:39,305 --> 01:07:42,183 I go to school in Michigan, but I definitely... 1083 01:07:42,266 --> 01:07:45,436 I think I'm gonna be back here for Christmas break, 1084 01:07:45,519 --> 01:07:47,104 'cause I really like New York. 1085 01:07:49,273 --> 01:07:51,692 I really enjoyed talking to you. 1086 01:07:51,776 --> 01:07:53,569 I like what you had to say. 1087 01:07:54,904 --> 01:07:57,698 I don't even know you. So I'm gonna go. 1088 01:08:04,956 --> 01:08:07,041 Roland called. He, uh... 1089 01:08:07,124 --> 01:08:09,502 He wants to borrow money again. Jesus. 1090 01:08:09,585 --> 01:08:11,712 -Who were you talking to? -Nobody. 1091 01:08:12,713 --> 01:08:16,467 I was standing right here. I saw you. You were talking to someone. 1092 01:08:16,550 --> 01:08:18,261 Who? 1093 01:08:18,344 --> 01:08:20,429 I was calling the machine. 1094 01:08:20,513 --> 01:08:23,182 No, you weren't. Words were coming out of your mouth. 1095 01:08:23,266 --> 01:08:25,893 You were having a conversation. Who were you talking to? 1096 01:08:25,977 --> 01:08:28,521 I was talking to the machine. 1097 01:08:28,604 --> 01:08:31,148 You were talking to our machine? 1098 01:08:32,692 --> 01:08:34,610 Why are you lying? 1099 01:08:34,694 --> 01:08:36,028 I'm not. 1100 01:08:37,571 --> 01:08:39,115 Jo, why are you lying to me? 1101 01:08:39,198 --> 01:08:42,285 Oh, Carl, God. It's such a long day. 1102 01:08:42,368 --> 01:08:46,080 You called that guy, didn't you? You purposefully left your purse 1103 01:08:46,163 --> 01:08:49,125 SO you could go back there and talk to him, didn't you? 1104 01:08:49,208 --> 01:08:52,586 -What the fuck are you doing? -Don't yell at me! 1105 01:08:52,670 --> 01:08:55,131 -You called that fucker, didn't you? -Don't yell at me! 1106 01:08:55,214 --> 01:08:57,717 Why, Jo? Why-Why are you doing this? 1107 01:08:57,800 --> 01:08:59,969 Do you realize what you're doing when you lie to me? 1108 01:09:00,052 --> 01:09:02,096 Do you have any clue what trust is? 1109 01:09:02,179 --> 01:09:04,724 -What's going on? -Go back to the car. 1110 01:09:04,807 --> 01:09:06,600 -What did you do? -Go back to the car. 1111 01:09:06,684 --> 01:09:08,894 -I didn't do anything. Jesus Christ! -Yes, you did. 1112 01:09:08,978 --> 01:09:11,355 It's like the fucking Inquisition here! God! 1113 01:09:11,439 --> 01:09:13,566 Don't you talk that way to me! 1114 01:09:13,649 --> 01:09:16,193 Leave me alone. Just leave me alone. 1115 01:09:18,070 --> 01:09:22,491 I don't know what's going on here, but you better wise up. 1116 01:09:22,575 --> 01:09:24,952 Carl is a good man, and he loves you. 1117 01:09:25,036 --> 01:09:27,371 -Oh, Mom — -This is no joke. 1118 01:09:27,455 --> 01:09:29,415 -Oh, please. -Carl will look after you. 1119 01:09:29,498 --> 01:09:32,043 -Save it, okay? Save it. -Carl is a good person. 1120 01:09:32,126 --> 01:09:34,211 He is dedicated to you. 1121 01:09:34,295 --> 01:09:36,839 And if you screw this up 1122 01:09:36,922 --> 01:09:40,301 by chasing after God knows what, you're a fool! 1123 01:09:40,384 --> 01:09:42,470 A fool! Just wise up! 1124 01:09:42,553 --> 01:09:46,640 You know, you don't know me, okay? So just leave me alone! 1125 01:09:46,724 --> 01:09:48,893 -You're an idiot! -Jo, can I talk to you, please? 1126 01:09:48,976 --> 01:09:51,604 Go to the car! No, I don't want to talk to you! 1127 01:09:51,687 --> 01:09:54,357 I'm sick of talking to you, I'm sick of listening to you, 1128 01:09:54,440 --> 01:09:56,192 I'm sick of you! 1129 01:09:56,275 --> 01:09:59,362 -I'm sick of you! -Good. Find someone else to be sick of. 1130 01:09:59,445 --> 01:10:02,531 -Carl, wait. Please, Carl, please. -No, it's no use. 1131 01:10:02,615 --> 01:10:05,659 Please. I'll talk to her, okay? 1132 01:10:07,203 --> 01:10:11,082 Carl, she's a foolish girl. She always has been. 1133 01:10:11,165 --> 01:10:13,959 No, actually she's not. 1134 01:10:14,043 --> 01:10:16,087 And she needs you. 1135 01:10:16,170 --> 01:10:19,090 She needs you, Carl. Please don't go. 1136 01:10:19,173 --> 01:10:21,092 I know you love her. 1137 01:10:22,927 --> 01:10:25,471 -I have to find a bathroom. -Okay. 1138 01:10:25,554 --> 01:10:29,392 Look, so, Carl, okay, I will talk to her, all right? 1139 01:10:29,475 --> 01:10:30,601 Yes. 1140 01:10:37,024 --> 01:10:41,070 You tell me what the hell is going on 1141 01:10:41,153 --> 01:10:43,572 before you throw away the best thing 1142 01:10:43,656 --> 01:10:46,117 -that ever happened to you in your life. -You have no right! 1143 01:10:46,200 --> 01:10:50,162 You have no right giving anybody advice, Mom. 1144 01:10:50,246 --> 01:10:52,832 Okay? You have no right. 1145 01:10:52,915 --> 01:10:56,252 You pushed... You pushed Eliza to marry Louis. 1146 01:10:56,335 --> 01:10:58,170 -Now look what's happening, Mom! -I what? 1147 01:10:58,254 --> 01:11:01,424 Look what's happening! You don't know anything, Mom! 1148 01:11:01,507 --> 01:11:04,927 You know nothing, Mom! You know nothing! 1149 01:11:05,010 --> 01:11:08,305 Come back here! Now! 1150 01:11:18,983 --> 01:11:21,777 What are you doing standing there like a bull? 1151 01:11:21,861 --> 01:11:24,447 Why don't you do something? 1152 01:11:24,530 --> 01:11:27,241 Hell, what can I do? 1153 01:11:30,202 --> 01:11:32,204 [sobbing] You are useless. 1154 01:11:34,039 --> 01:11:35,541 Useless! 1155 01:11:43,924 --> 01:11:45,926 [dance music playing] 1156 01:11:48,012 --> 01:11:51,098 I want you to just look over there and tell me, is he looking at me? 1157 01:11:51,182 --> 01:11:52,850 No, wait! 1158 01:11:52,933 --> 01:11:55,060 Is he looking at me? No, wait! 1159 01:11:55,144 --> 01:11:58,856 Or is he looking at the redhead with the big... 1160 01:11:58,939 --> 01:12:00,232 Okay, now look. 1161 01:12:01,066 --> 01:12:03,152 Is he looking at me? 1162 01:12:03,235 --> 01:12:04,570 No. 1163 01:12:04,653 --> 01:12:07,239 Look again. Do you think he knows I'm here? 1164 01:12:08,949 --> 01:12:11,744 No, wait. Don't let him see you looking like that. You're staring. 1165 01:12:11,827 --> 01:12:15,539 -I don't think he is. -Okay, we need some more drinks, darling. 1166 01:12:15,623 --> 01:12:17,416 [laughs] 1167 01:12:30,221 --> 01:12:34,642 -Monica! Hi! How are you? -Hi! 1168 01:12:41,232 --> 01:12:42,900 Where'd you go? 1169 01:12:42,983 --> 01:12:45,152 Do you know where Sandy is? 1170 01:12:45,236 --> 01:12:48,364 Oh, I think Sandy's on the roof. Do you want to go up? Perfect. 1171 01:12:48,447 --> 01:12:50,991 They got lights and everything up there. Do some dancing... 1172 01:12:51,075 --> 01:12:53,118 [continues, indistinct] 1173 01:12:56,997 --> 01:12:59,166 We can... dance! 1174 01:12:59,250 --> 01:13:00,709 [chuckles] 1175 01:13:06,674 --> 01:13:08,551 [bottle clinking] 1176 01:13:12,054 --> 01:13:14,306 [Latin music playing] 1177 01:13:14,390 --> 01:13:16,392 [chattering] 1178 01:14:50,319 --> 01:14:52,071 [no audible dialogue] 1179 01:14:58,535 --> 01:14:59,703 [Louis] Eliza! 1180 01:15:02,998 --> 01:15:04,667 [bottle clatters] 1181 01:15:09,129 --> 01:15:11,715 Eliza, where are you going? Where are you going? 1182 01:15:11,799 --> 01:15:14,551 What are you doing? What are you doing in the city? 1183 01:15:15,594 --> 01:15:16,929 What are you doing? 1184 01:15:17,012 --> 01:15:19,682 What are you doing in the city? What? 1185 01:15:19,765 --> 01:15:21,392 What's the matter with you? 1186 01:15:21,475 --> 01:15:24,269 I came to this party, I came with Chap, and-and, um, 1187 01:15:24,353 --> 01:15:27,773 he said, you know, he's having a party, do you want to go? 1188 01:15:27,856 --> 01:15:30,651 And I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I came. 1189 01:15:30,734 --> 01:15:34,196 Are you mad that I came to the party? You're mad 'cause I didn't tell you. 1190 01:15:34,279 --> 01:15:36,824 -I'm sorry. -Louis, stop lying. 1191 01:15:36,907 --> 01:15:38,742 -Stop lying about what? -I saw you. 1192 01:15:40,244 --> 01:15:44,164 -You saw me what? -I saw you and Sandy... kissing. 1193 01:15:51,755 --> 01:15:53,048 [sighs] 1194 01:15:57,052 --> 01:16:01,098 -All right. Oh, God, Eliza — -Don't tell me I didn't see what I saw. 1195 01:16:01,181 --> 01:16:03,851 -Let me just try to explain. -You have to explain, don't you? 1196 01:16:03,934 --> 01:16:06,645 Yes, I do, I do. You're right. Okay. Calm down. 1197 01:16:10,858 --> 01:16:13,944 Look, let me tell you some stuff that I've been... 1198 01:16:14,027 --> 01:16:16,697 that I've been trying to figure out, okay? 1199 01:16:17,740 --> 01:16:20,033 -[sighs] -Don't touch me, Louis. Jesus Christ. 1200 01:16:20,117 --> 01:16:22,619 Okay, all right, honey, let's go some place and talk. 1201 01:16:22,703 --> 01:16:25,080 -You'll be sorry. -No, no, no! No, no, no! 1202 01:16:25,164 --> 01:16:26,999 Wait! Wait a minute. 1203 01:16:27,082 --> 01:16:28,959 Now, wait. Eliz — Come here. Wait. 1204 01:16:29,042 --> 01:16:32,880 No, no, no. Eliza, come here! Let me just talk to you for a minute. 1205 01:16:32,963 --> 01:16:36,467 -Okay? Let's just go and talk. -What in God's name is going on? 1206 01:16:36,550 --> 01:16:39,011 Jesus Christ. Rita, what are you doing here? 1207 01:16:39,094 --> 01:16:41,346 -What is this? -Are you cheating on Eliza? Are you? 1208 01:16:41,430 --> 01:16:44,266 What is this, a family affair? Why is everybody here? 1209 01:16:44,349 --> 01:16:47,519 Did he tell you? Is he having an affair with that woman? 1210 01:16:47,603 --> 01:16:50,063 I'm asking you. You know, you exchanged vows. 1211 01:16:50,147 --> 01:16:51,774 -No, no. -Vows, Louis. 1212 01:16:51,857 --> 01:16:54,026 - Know that. I know, I know. -Vows. 1213 01:16:54,109 --> 01:16:56,570 -Can I please have a moment? -Then what is the explanation? 1214 01:16:56,653 --> 01:16:59,239 -Just tell me, what is the explanation? -Louis, are you okay? 1215 01:16:59,323 --> 01:17:02,159 Oh, yes, yes. Everything's okay. Everything's fine, Sandy. 1216 01:17:02,242 --> 01:17:05,871 Just go back upstairs. Everything's fine. I'll be in there... I'll be in there... 1217 01:17:05,954 --> 01:17:07,623 I'll be in there in a minute. 1218 01:17:15,214 --> 01:17:18,383 -Oh, God! -[Louis] All right. Okay. All right. 1219 01:17:18,467 --> 01:17:20,844 Oh, my God! 1220 01:17:22,012 --> 01:17:23,680 Oh, my God! 1221 01:17:23,764 --> 01:17:26,475 -Eliza, can you and I go talk right now? -No! 1222 01:17:26,558 --> 01:17:29,937 Rita, will you stop? Can I please have a conversation... 1223 01:17:30,020 --> 01:17:32,731 You're garbage, that's what you are. 1224 01:17:32,815 --> 01:17:35,943 Does your mother know about her son? 1225 01:17:36,026 --> 01:17:38,612 Mrs. Malone, could you please not bring my mother into this? 1226 01:17:38,695 --> 01:17:42,241 Yeah, well, your mother has a right to know about her son. 1227 01:17:42,324 --> 01:17:45,035 No, she doesn't have every right to know! I'm a grown man! 1228 01:17:45,118 --> 01:17:48,497 -Can I have a conversation with my wife? -How could you hurt her like that? 1229 01:17:48,580 --> 01:17:50,874 How could you do this to Eliza, huh? 1230 01:17:50,958 --> 01:17:54,002 How could you do that to me? I loved you, Louis. 1231 01:17:54,086 --> 01:17:57,673 - I loved you like you were my own boy. - I know, I know. I know that. 1232 01:17:57,756 --> 01:18:00,133 -Yes. -And I loved you like you were my mother. 1233 01:18:00,217 --> 01:18:02,928 -Can I please talk to my wife? -Don't touch her! 1234 01:18:03,011 --> 01:18:05,556 Come on. Eliza's going with us. Get in the car. 1235 01:18:05,639 --> 01:18:08,225 [Louis] Eliza, will you please come with me? 1236 01:18:08,308 --> 01:18:11,562 Eliza, can I please have a... Can you stop staring at me, please? 1237 01:18:11,645 --> 01:18:15,065 Get in the car. Shut up! Don't you touch her! 1238 01:18:15,148 --> 01:18:17,818 Get in the car. Come on. We're going. 1239 01:18:18,777 --> 01:18:19,862 Now! 1240 01:18:27,744 --> 01:18:29,788 -Can I talk to you... -[Rita] Don't touch her! 1241 01:18:29,872 --> 01:18:32,875 -Rita, will you please let me talk to her? -Don't touch her! I'll kill you! 1242 01:18:32,958 --> 01:18:36,670 You'll kill me? Rita... Eliza, can I please talk to you? 1243 01:18:41,592 --> 01:18:43,719 Jim, let's go. 1244 01:18:43,802 --> 01:18:47,139 Eliza, you want to go? 1245 01:18:47,222 --> 01:18:49,266 What are you doing? I said, let's go. 1246 01:18:50,517 --> 01:18:53,478 I'm asking Eliza what she wants to do. 1247 01:18:53,562 --> 01:18:58,108 Oh, now, at this late hour, you're asking Eliza what she wants to do? 1248 01:18:58,191 --> 01:19:01,570 Isn't that a little strange that now you are getting involved? 1249 01:19:01,653 --> 01:19:04,364 -Why do you sit there like that? What — -Shut up, Rita! 1250 01:19:04,448 --> 01:19:06,408 -You're a weak — -Shut up! 1251 01:19:09,995 --> 01:19:12,748 I'll tell you what I want to do, Dad. 1252 01:19:12,831 --> 01:19:15,042 And thanks for asking. 1253 01:19:15,125 --> 01:19:18,962 -I want to get the fuck out of this car. -Oh, no. Please, Eliza. Please don't go. 1254 01:19:19,046 --> 01:19:20,172 Eliza! 1255 01:19:24,593 --> 01:19:26,762 I have two idiots for daughters. 1256 01:19:29,598 --> 01:19:30,891 [Rita sniffles] 1257 01:19:32,351 --> 01:19:35,938 Honey, honey, honey, thank you. Thanks. 1258 01:19:36,021 --> 01:19:38,774 -Okay. -Let's go some place and talk, okay? 1259 01:19:38,857 --> 01:19:41,777 Let's just talk here, because I have a few questions I want to ask you. 1260 01:19:41,860 --> 01:19:43,236 -Can you just give me... -Yeah. 1261 01:19:43,320 --> 01:19:45,948 All right, now, do you think you're gay? 1262 01:19:47,157 --> 01:19:49,826 Why are you smiling at that? What is so funny about that question? 1263 01:19:49,910 --> 01:19:52,120 No, nothing's funny. No, it's just, that's a very... 1264 01:19:52,204 --> 01:19:55,290 That's a very difficult question for me to answer. 1265 01:19:55,374 --> 01:19:58,794 Okay, fine, fine, fine. Let me phrase it to you in a different way. 1266 01:19:58,877 --> 01:20:01,213 Are you having sex with this person? 1267 01:20:07,302 --> 01:20:10,681 Yes, but... Yes. Yes, but I don't know... 1268 01:20:10,764 --> 01:20:12,933 -How long has this been going on? -Not very long. 1269 01:20:13,016 --> 01:20:14,810 Like, six months. 1270 01:20:14,893 --> 01:20:17,980 -Six months? -Yes, but it's nothing. I mean... 1271 01:20:18,063 --> 01:20:20,440 Since December. Whenever. 1272 01:20:20,524 --> 01:20:22,526 That's a year, Louis. A year! 1273 01:20:25,529 --> 01:20:26,947 Okay. 1274 01:20:27,030 --> 01:20:29,074 Do you love this person? 1275 01:20:30,242 --> 01:20:33,328 -I don't know. I don't even know. -Louis, wait, wait. 1276 01:20:33,412 --> 01:20:35,664 -It just turned into — -What is it like? What is it like — 1277 01:20:35,747 --> 01:20:39,209 I don't know! I don't know what it is. I don't know! I don't know what it is! 1278 01:20:39,292 --> 01:20:43,005 I don't know! I don't know! I don't know what it is! 1279 01:20:43,088 --> 01:20:46,299 I don't know! And you have to help me find out. 1280 01:20:47,009 --> 01:20:49,720 I'm confused, and you have to help me! 1281 01:20:49,803 --> 01:20:51,263 Okay? 1282 01:20:57,436 --> 01:20:59,229 I have to help you? 1283 01:21:07,529 --> 01:21:08,822 Oh, God. 1284 01:21:10,449 --> 01:21:11,867 I'm sorry. 1285 01:21:13,160 --> 01:21:14,494 Let's just go home. 1286 01:21:17,205 --> 01:21:20,042 Let's go home. Let's just go home, okay? 1287 01:21:20,125 --> 01:21:21,585 Let's just go home. 1288 01:21:23,253 --> 01:21:24,296 No. 1289 01:21:29,760 --> 01:21:32,012 Where is she going? 1290 01:21:33,972 --> 01:21:35,140 Eliza! 1291 01:21:36,892 --> 01:21:37,976 Eliza? 1292 01:21:41,480 --> 01:21:42,981 I should go with her. 1293 01:21:48,945 --> 01:21:51,573 I'm sorry, Carl. 1294 01:21:52,908 --> 01:21:55,035 I'm so sorry. 1295 01:21:56,953 --> 01:21:57,996 I, uh... 1296 01:22:00,123 --> 01:22:02,167 Are you gonna be in the car? 1297 01:22:02,250 --> 01:22:05,504 Yeah, I'll stay here to make sure your parents don't kill each other. 1298 01:22:06,630 --> 01:22:08,548 How are you gonna do that? 1299 01:22:11,927 --> 01:22:15,222 Soothe them to sleep with the last chapter of my novel. 1300 01:22:17,390 --> 01:22:19,935 -Thanks. -Go ahead. 1301 01:22:25,023 --> 01:22:26,817 [horn honks] 1302 01:22:39,287 --> 01:22:42,082 [Southern accent] Where are you going to, Miss Malone? 1303 01:22:42,165 --> 01:22:45,460 [Southern accent] There's a riverboat that'll take me out of this here city. 104794

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