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1
00:00:06,160 --> 00:00:09,880
Yes. I see it too, Alfred. Yes,
it's a fire at Factory Six. Well done.
2
00:00:10,679 --> 00:00:13,438
No! I'll handle it. Connect me
to the Factory's head Operator.
3
00:00:13,439 --> 00:00:16,079
Not in today? For why?
"Christmas"?
4
00:00:16,679 --> 00:00:19,599
You mean this new Holiday
the bureaucrats at city hall
5
00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:20,839
are forcing down our throats?
6
00:00:21,879 --> 00:00:24,518
Okay! Now, according to the official
handbook.
7
00:00:24,519 --> 00:00:28,319
Parents may consider allowing
children to open just one present
8
00:00:28,320 --> 00:00:32,119
on the evening before Christmas!
Go for it!
9
00:00:36,679 --> 00:00:38,159
Mommy!
10
00:00:39,280 --> 00:00:42,079
What's wrong, Theo Jr?
Did the guitar scare you?
11
00:00:43,159 --> 00:00:45,038
Cause it looks like a demonic weapon?
12
00:00:45,039 --> 00:00:47,280
It's okay.
I won't let it hurt you.
13
00:00:52,359 --> 00:00:55,600
My little Stebey! What happened?
The blue shirt scared you?
14
00:00:56,640 --> 00:00:58,759
Because it's a potential
strangulation hazard?
15
00:01:01,399 --> 00:01:04,519
Don't be scared!
Christmas is nothing to be afraid of!
16
00:01:05,040 --> 00:01:07,158
Keep it down down there,
you fucking neanderthals.
17
00:01:07,159 --> 00:01:08,839
No! No fire department!
18
00:01:08,840 --> 00:01:11,438
It's a treasure trove of health
and labor violations in that place!
19
00:01:11,439 --> 00:01:13,639
Besides, I think the flames
are already starting to dwindle!
20
00:01:13,640 --> 00:01:15,438
Theodore,
I need a hand down here!
21
00:01:15,439 --> 00:01:18,640
Not now, marjorie! There's a tiny,
inconsequential fire at factory six.
22
00:01:21,359 --> 00:01:22,718
Sweetheart, are you okay?
23
00:01:22,719 --> 00:01:24,878
Don't touch me! You've done
enough damage here!
24
00:01:24,879 --> 00:01:27,920
What are you doing in here? Do I ever set
foot in your rooms? Get back here!
25
00:01:29,239 --> 00:01:31,919
Theodore, stop it! They were just
concerned for their father!
26
00:01:31,920 --> 00:01:35,358
They can't see me in a state of weakness
or they'll lose respect for me, Marjorie!
27
00:01:35,359 --> 00:01:37,238
I'm kind of an authority
figure around here!
28
00:01:37,239 --> 00:01:40,039
You people think I can just stop working
at the drop of a nutsack?
29
00:01:40,040 --> 00:01:42,199
That I'm vulnerable due
to my factory exploding,
30
00:01:42,200 --> 00:01:44,279
subjecting me to countless
criminal investigations?
31
00:01:44,280 --> 00:01:46,798
Literally no one is thinking
any of that, Theodore!
32
00:01:46,799 --> 00:01:49,559
Well if I'm so weak and vulnerable how
would I be able to do this?
33
00:01:49,560 --> 00:01:52,559
- I'm stronger than a velociraptor!
- We're sorry, Sweety!
34
00:01:52,560 --> 00:01:54,839
You like that, Little Theo?
That's you!
35
00:01:54,840 --> 00:01:58,039
This plant is you. What's the other
one's name? Stebe?
36
00:01:58,040 --> 00:02:00,599
This plant represents your stupid
little face, Stebe!
37
00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:03,840
No! Our government issued tree!
38
00:02:31,960 --> 00:02:33,800
{\an8}Alright there, guy, here we are!
39
00:02:35,879 --> 00:02:36,918
{\an8}This isn't Cone Zone.
40
00:02:36,919 --> 00:02:40,800
{\an8}Yep, Cone Zone Ice Cream Parlor!
Says right on this map!
41
00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:44,680
{\an8}Okay. Thank you.
42
00:03:10,120 --> 00:03:12,598
Hey there!
You seem like a nice dog!
43
00:03:12,599 --> 00:03:15,919
Most animals just attack me on sight!
You're probably like, 'even birds?'
44
00:03:41,560 --> 00:03:44,879
Help me! There's a crazy dog chasing me
and one bird so far!
45
00:03:48,639 --> 00:03:50,280
You guys work for Cone Zone?
46
00:03:59,879 --> 00:04:01,080
Get to the bunker!
47
00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:31,600
Let's ride, dog!
48
00:04:39,759 --> 00:04:43,278
Matt! We sent you to the Cone Zone
an hour ago! Bring in those scoops!
49
00:04:43,279 --> 00:04:46,679
Yeah okay, you got it,
I just have to go to my room...
50
00:04:46,680 --> 00:04:48,639
God, spare us the details.
51
00:04:50,560 --> 00:04:52,799
Okay, dog.
Stay here and play with Pop-Pop.
52
00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:54,879
I'll go talk everyone into letting
you stay with us!
53
00:04:56,160 --> 00:04:59,040
Don't worry. I'm kind of an authority
figure around here.
54
00:05:27,879 --> 00:05:29,278
You wanted to see me,
Mr. Hornsby?
55
00:05:29,279 --> 00:05:32,439
Ah, Young Jonathan, yes?
Head Operator at Factory Six, yes?
56
00:05:32,839 --> 00:05:35,078
Hope our little Christmas Eve mishap
hasn't delayed
57
00:05:35,079 --> 00:05:37,398
the release of Blooming Onion
Royal Crackers now, has it?
58
00:05:37,399 --> 00:05:39,278
Wonderful! Hey, you hungry?
59
00:05:39,279 --> 00:05:42,239
What? Oh no thank you.
I ate four corn dogs on the way here.
60
00:05:42,240 --> 00:05:44,359
Oh, I insist!
We sent an intern to salvage
61
00:05:44,360 --> 00:05:48,000
a box off your factory floor just
this morning! Here you go! Dig in!
62
00:06:00,639 --> 00:06:04,838
I don't know what happened, Mr. Hornsby!
The factory workers, the Utzi Wutzi,
63
00:06:04,839 --> 00:06:08,198
I must have miscommunicated the formula
for our Onion Blasted seasoning!
64
00:06:08,199 --> 00:06:09,638
No shit, Angela Landsbury!
65
00:06:09,639 --> 00:06:12,438
Your miscommunication created
an explosive chemical reaction
66
00:06:12,439 --> 00:06:13,958
of which the world has
never seen!
67
00:06:13,959 --> 00:06:16,679
The bohemians at CVM News are reporting
that this could forever destroy
68
00:06:16,680 --> 00:06:18,199
the pristine landscape of Bakersfield!
69
00:06:18,560 --> 00:06:21,078
Mr. Hornsby, I signed
on to oversee factory Six
70
00:06:21,079 --> 00:06:25,838
because I believed in your vision for an
onion flavored cracker! You're my hero!
71
00:06:25,839 --> 00:06:28,439
- The devil you say?
- You're my hero.
72
00:06:34,720 --> 00:06:36,318
Maybe we can work something out.
73
00:06:36,319 --> 00:06:39,599
Falsify some documents and find
another man to take the fall.
74
00:06:39,600 --> 00:06:41,198
Oh, I don't know, Mr. Hornsby.
75
00:06:41,199 --> 00:06:44,398
I'm already racked with guilt over
exploiting illegal workers.
76
00:06:44,399 --> 00:06:48,758
I'm starting to not even recognize the
renegade I'm becoming. I feel terrible!
77
00:06:48,759 --> 00:06:51,240
Yes. But doesn't it feel so good?
78
00:06:52,560 --> 00:06:55,160
Yes, Mr. Hornsby.
It does.
79
00:06:56,040 --> 00:06:58,198
Thank you.
Thank you, Mr. Hornsby!
80
00:06:58,199 --> 00:07:02,000
Thank you, Mr. Hornsby! Thank you,
forever! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
81
00:07:02,399 --> 00:07:04,799
Thank you! Thank you so much!
Thank you!
82
00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:08,079
I am forever in your debt!
Forever and ever. And ever!
83
00:07:15,720 --> 00:07:16,879
Piece of shit...
84
00:07:17,639 --> 00:07:19,799
- Hello?
- Fuck! Fucking dog... Kill it.
85
00:07:19,800 --> 00:07:21,639
Kill this fucking dog now!
86
00:07:26,480 --> 00:07:27,519
Jonathan, honey?
87
00:07:31,040 --> 00:07:34,319
The caller ID said it was someone
named Theodore Hornsby?
88
00:07:35,759 --> 00:07:36,680
What did he say.
89
00:07:37,160 --> 00:07:41,600
He said, "Fucking dog. Kill it.
Kill this fucking dog now."
90
00:07:42,759 --> 00:07:45,680
- Where are you going?
- To return a favor.
91
00:07:47,959 --> 00:07:49,399
Don't forget to pick up some milk!
92
00:07:50,759 --> 00:07:53,159
Hey. I need to ask
you guys something...
93
00:07:53,160 --> 00:07:56,518
Where were you? We were supposed to start
decorating the tree an hour from now!
94
00:07:56,519 --> 00:08:00,119
- We decided to start early without you!
- Well then why are you mad at me?
95
00:08:00,120 --> 00:08:03,159
I guess I'm not! I guess this is
just how I prefer talking to you!
96
00:08:03,160 --> 00:08:05,518
We wanted to get a head start
cause the Family Christmas shoot
97
00:08:05,519 --> 00:08:08,838
is just a few days away!
And this tree ain't gonna decorate itself!
98
00:08:08,839 --> 00:08:10,719
Especially if we wanna go big
this year!
99
00:08:10,720 --> 00:08:13,119
I got the step ladder out so you
could put the star on top
100
00:08:13,120 --> 00:08:14,759
as per our yearly tradition!
101
00:08:16,920 --> 00:08:18,240
The heck?
102
00:08:19,480 --> 00:08:22,000
You guys just chill.
I'll go check it out.
103
00:08:28,120 --> 00:08:32,239
Holy shit!
Dog, drop it!
104
00:08:32,240 --> 00:08:35,919
- Matt, what is going on up here?
- Quick! Get under the bed!
105
00:08:42,080 --> 00:08:43,638
Beating up your Pop-Pop?
106
00:08:43,639 --> 00:08:46,199
Just cause we started decorating
the tree without you?
107
00:08:46,200 --> 00:08:47,918
No one gets wetter
than I do for Christmas
108
00:08:47,919 --> 00:08:50,599
but you do not take your holiday
woes out on Pop-Pop!
109
00:08:50,600 --> 00:08:52,079
That make you feel like a big tough guy?
110
00:08:52,080 --> 00:08:54,679
Picking on a defenseless old man?
Let's see how you like it?
111
00:08:56,440 --> 00:08:58,599
- How's that feel?
- Look what you're making him do!
112
00:08:58,600 --> 00:09:01,119
- Doesn't feel so good, does it?
- This is for your own good, Matt.
113
00:09:01,120 --> 00:09:03,839
This hurts me too.
He's gonna faint, Matt!
114
00:09:03,840 --> 00:09:06,278
- You learn your lesson?
- Say you've learned your lesson!
115
00:09:06,279 --> 00:09:10,600
Say you've learned your lesson and it can
stop right now. Just say it!
116
00:09:12,519 --> 00:09:15,080
Keep an eye on him.
I'll be comin' back for seconds.
117
00:09:15,600 --> 00:09:18,839
You have officially unleashed
the beast.
118
00:09:18,840 --> 00:09:19,919
What can I do ya for?
119
00:09:23,440 --> 00:09:25,240
- Where is the dog?
- What?
120
00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:27,839
Who is that?
121
00:09:27,840 --> 00:09:30,679
Why don't you try dancing with someone
with some stage presence?
122
00:09:34,279 --> 00:09:35,919
Don't make me use this, Buck-o!
123
00:09:38,960 --> 00:09:41,440
Last chance. Hand over the dog.
124
00:09:52,320 --> 00:09:54,320
You'll pay! You'll all pay!
125
00:10:02,639 --> 00:10:04,279
Now where were we?
126
00:10:08,879 --> 00:10:11,439
- Oh my god he's adorable!
- That's a good ass dog!
127
00:10:11,440 --> 00:10:13,518
Matt, where did you find
this little cutie?
128
00:10:13,519 --> 00:10:16,798
It was just wandering around the new
Cone Zone Creamery! Can we keep it?
129
00:10:16,799 --> 00:10:19,158
Of course! He just saved
your Daddy's life!
130
00:10:19,159 --> 00:10:21,320
Guess who's not bleeding anymore!
131
00:10:21,840 --> 00:10:23,599
Dear god!
132
00:10:23,600 --> 00:10:26,120
- What the fuck, dude?
- Dog, drop it!
133
00:10:26,799 --> 00:10:31,080
You see that, Dad? He learned it from you!
He learned it from watching you.
134
00:10:42,279 --> 00:10:45,599
Okay! I know, I know! Mommy looks
like a little scary.
135
00:10:45,600 --> 00:10:48,239
But it's just me inside this shirt
and behind this guitar.
136
00:10:48,240 --> 00:10:50,959
See? Christmas is
nothing to be afraid of!
137
00:10:50,960 --> 00:10:54,359
First of all, this shirt is very comfy.
And the collar's nice and loose!
138
00:10:54,360 --> 00:10:58,119
Look! I'm breathing just fine!
Not to mention how cool I look!
139
00:10:58,120 --> 00:11:03,278
And Theo, I know this thing may look like
a demonic beast from hell and it is!
140
00:11:03,279 --> 00:11:05,039
But not if you learn how to tame it!
141
00:11:06,440 --> 00:11:08,878
Okay... Looks like my hands
are in the right place...
142
00:11:08,879 --> 00:11:12,079
Let's see here. I guess
This is something called a Drop D?
143
00:11:12,080 --> 00:11:13,919
Let's give it a whirl!
144
00:11:36,399 --> 00:11:39,000
- That's pretty cool!
- Sufi baby!
145
00:11:41,679 --> 00:11:43,840
Mommy, you're our hero.
146
00:11:53,240 --> 00:11:57,799
You guys never let me have three scoops!
And Dog loves it too!
147
00:11:59,399 --> 00:12:01,278
Matt, we gotta take Dog to the pound
so he can be euthanized.
148
00:12:01,279 --> 00:12:05,798
Look, we don't wanna do it either.
We all love Dog but he's dangerous!
149
00:12:05,799 --> 00:12:08,918
- He keeps attacking Pop-Pop!
- Dog is a girl!
150
00:12:08,919 --> 00:12:11,839
No, Matt.
Dog is a boy. He's just neutered.
151
00:12:11,840 --> 00:12:14,398
- That's why his dick was cut off.
- And replaced with a vagina.
152
00:12:14,399 --> 00:12:15,960
Oh is that what that thing is?
153
00:12:16,879 --> 00:12:20,999
Anyway, Matt. We can't keep Dog around
and risk any more attacks on Pop-Pop!
154
00:12:21,000 --> 00:12:24,518
Why not? Dog saved our lives!
What has Pop-Pop ever done for us?
155
00:12:24,519 --> 00:12:25,599
- I beg your pudding?
- What?
156
00:12:25,600 --> 00:12:29,199
Okay. You want me to list all the things
he's done for this family?
157
00:12:29,200 --> 00:12:31,638
How long's this list gotta be?
How about four?
158
00:12:31,639 --> 00:12:34,398
Would that be a long enough list for you?
How bout five things?
159
00:12:34,399 --> 00:12:36,999
What happens when I get to five?
Let me guess: Six?
160
00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:39,719
You want six things
that Pop-Pop's done for us?
161
00:12:39,720 --> 00:12:43,839
I can't even... Do I look like Santa?
Is that what I look like to you?
162
00:12:43,840 --> 00:12:46,840
Cause I got better things to do
today than sit around here making lists.
163
00:12:50,080 --> 00:12:51,759
- What's happening?
- What the heck?
164
00:12:52,399 --> 00:12:55,439
Hornsbys! You are in possession
of a contaminated life form
165
00:12:55,440 --> 00:12:57,439
from the Factory Six Exclusion Zone!
166
00:12:57,440 --> 00:13:00,878
You are jeopardizing public health
and safety! Come with us immediately!
167
00:13:00,879 --> 00:13:03,000
Well, you heard'm let's go!
168
00:13:14,799 --> 00:13:18,758
Congratulations! Your exposure to intense
levels of radiation have made you
169
00:13:18,759 --> 00:13:22,319
{\an8}a prime candidate for residency
within Factory Six Exclusion Zone!
170
00:13:22,320 --> 00:13:25,678
{\an8}A bustling work/live encampment where
you'll be contributing to the restoration
171
00:13:25,679 --> 00:13:28,398
{\an8}of Bakersfield's illustrious
industrial belt.
172
00:13:28,399 --> 00:13:30,119
What are they gonna do with Dog?
173
00:13:30,120 --> 00:13:33,320
Don't worry, Matt! Dog's gonna be
fine! These are the good guys!
174
00:13:44,279 --> 00:13:46,079
I'd hate to be in your simple
flats right now.
175
00:13:46,080 --> 00:13:48,079
The destruction of an entire
town at your feet?
176
00:13:48,080 --> 00:13:49,639
Tell me what happened
at Factory Six!
177
00:13:50,320 --> 00:13:52,918
Corn Dog cart just pulled up outside.
You go on ahead.
178
00:13:52,919 --> 00:13:54,480
I'll finish up with this one.
179
00:13:55,039 --> 00:13:56,240
Now where were we...
180
00:13:58,240 --> 00:13:59,599
- My love.
- Theodore!
181
00:13:59,600 --> 00:14:02,720
These fellas think I'm responsible
for that terrible Christmas Eve explosion!
182
00:14:04,080 --> 00:14:06,359
This Christmas bullshit
your on, Marjorie.
183
00:14:06,360 --> 00:14:08,959
They've got it in their rubber skulls that
it distracted me
184
00:14:08,960 --> 00:14:11,719
from my safety duties within
the company. And they're right.
185
00:14:11,720 --> 00:14:16,839
I just wanted to spend too much time
with my family on Christmas... Eve.
186
00:14:16,840 --> 00:14:20,158
But they'll send me away from
my boys, Theodore. They need me!
187
00:14:20,159 --> 00:14:22,439
No, they don't, Marjorie.
Think about it.
188
00:14:22,440 --> 00:14:26,278
What becomes of you if I get sent away?
You become poor and destitute.
189
00:14:26,279 --> 00:14:30,079
Eventually all you have is that fully
paid-off mansion I've left behind.
190
00:14:30,080 --> 00:14:33,758
Imagine. Little Theo Jr growing up
wandering the halls aimlessly?
191
00:14:33,759 --> 00:14:36,439
Constantly reminiscing of days gone by.
192
00:14:36,440 --> 00:14:39,639
- Stebe would manage alright!
- He's long dead in this scenario!
193
00:14:40,679 --> 00:14:44,600
You have to take the fall for this,
my love. For our family.
194
00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:51,399
What was that?
195
00:14:55,480 --> 00:14:56,559
What the hell?
196
00:14:57,919 --> 00:14:59,679
What was that? C'mon, move it.
197
00:15:00,399 --> 00:15:02,879
Run! Go, go! Move it, run, run.
198
00:15:05,320 --> 00:15:06,360
What was that?
199
00:15:06,960 --> 00:15:09,599
What the hell? Run!
Go! Go! Move it! Run!
200
00:15:09,600 --> 00:15:11,919
What the hell? What was that?!
201
00:15:24,559 --> 00:15:25,840
What the hell?
202
00:15:33,399 --> 00:15:34,519
Run!
203
00:15:36,399 --> 00:15:37,480
What was that?!
204
00:15:57,000 --> 00:15:58,360
My god!
205
00:16:07,559 --> 00:16:09,799
It's time to put that
dog down, kid!
206
00:16:27,080 --> 00:16:28,679
Run for it!
207
00:16:32,639 --> 00:16:34,320
No! Dog!
208
00:16:40,480 --> 00:16:43,758
Okay, my beautiful boys.
Mama got in some trouble and...
209
00:16:43,759 --> 00:16:46,839
Now she's got to go
with the other factory workers
210
00:16:46,840 --> 00:16:48,839
and help clean up the mess
she made, okay?
211
00:16:48,840 --> 00:16:51,080
You be on your best behavior
while I'm away.
212
00:16:53,399 --> 00:16:55,039
Don't you worry,
I'll be home in no time.
213
00:16:56,840 --> 00:16:58,279
I love you.
214
00:17:11,039 --> 00:17:12,359
Dog!
215
00:17:13,119 --> 00:17:14,440
Matt!
216
00:17:21,279 --> 00:17:22,559
Matt!
217
00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:44,720
Dog!
218
00:18:24,799 --> 00:18:26,279
Let's ride, Dog!
219
00:18:29,839 --> 00:18:32,160
Merry Christmas!
220
00:18:44,480 --> 00:18:46,079
Hey sweety!
How'd everything go?
221
00:18:49,759 --> 00:18:51,039
Did you get the milk?
222
00:19:06,319 --> 00:19:09,279
Till we meet in Valhalla, my lord.
223
00:19:34,599 --> 00:19:37,279
Utzilias...
my time has come...
224
00:19:37,920 --> 00:19:42,160
I only wish I could see my boys
one last time.
19171
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