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1
00:00:04,964 --> 00:00:07,717
[upbeat saxophone music]
2
00:00:07,759 --> 00:00:08,885
* *
3
00:00:08,926 --> 00:00:11,679
[camera shutter clicks]
- Ooh. [chuckles]
4
00:00:11,721 --> 00:00:14,849
- Oh, no, did I miss
the old people prom?
5
00:00:17,518 --> 00:00:20,605
- We were taking engagement
and publicity photos.
6
00:00:20,646 --> 00:00:22,774
Rosie "La Reina's"Insurance
is merging
7
00:00:22,815 --> 00:00:25,234
with No Way Josué's
Legal Services
8
00:00:25,276 --> 00:00:29,864
to create a one-stop shop
for pain and suffering.
9
00:00:29,906 --> 00:00:31,074
- Once we're married,
10
00:00:31,115 --> 00:00:35,787
we'll be
Mr. and Mrs. Accidentes.
11
00:00:38,206 --> 00:00:42,460
- Just so you know, I used
to call myself Mr. Accidentes.
12
00:00:42,502 --> 00:00:45,254
When we were pregnant
with Mayan.
13
00:00:47,590 --> 00:00:49,258
So maybe you should
rename yourself
14
00:00:49,300 --> 00:00:51,260
Mr. Esloppy Seconds.
15
00:00:51,302 --> 00:00:52,720
Ha!
- Hey!
16
00:00:52,762 --> 00:00:53,638
- Hey!
- Ew.
17
00:00:55,640 --> 00:00:58,851
- Why are you being so rude
to Josué?
18
00:00:58,893 --> 00:01:00,728
- Merging businesses?
19
00:01:00,770 --> 00:01:03,272
Getting married
after a few months?
20
00:01:03,314 --> 00:01:05,817
Wait, did you
get Josué pregnant?
21
00:01:08,069 --> 00:01:10,154
- Dad, that is their business.
22
00:01:11,948 --> 00:01:14,575
- Josué is part of my life now,
23
00:01:14,617 --> 00:01:17,787
so I'd really like it
if you tried bonding with him.
24
00:01:18,704 --> 00:01:21,290
- Fine.
I'll give it a shot.
25
00:01:21,332 --> 00:01:23,793
Well, listen,
let's call a truce, all right?
26
00:01:23,835 --> 00:01:25,336
We never fight.
27
00:01:25,378 --> 00:01:27,296
Like Churro
and the neighbor's cat.
28
00:01:27,338 --> 00:01:29,173
If we get mad at each other
occasionally,
29
00:01:29,215 --> 00:01:31,467
we'll pee on
each other's stuff.
30
00:01:34,303 --> 00:01:37,223
[upbeat saxophone music]
31
00:01:37,265 --> 00:01:40,435
* *
32
00:01:40,810 --> 00:01:43,479
- There's just one little thing
I want us all to do
33
00:01:43,521 --> 00:01:45,398
before my
engagement party here.
34
00:01:45,440 --> 00:01:46,441
- Sure.
- Name it.
35
00:01:46,482 --> 00:01:48,651
- Anything you want, Nana.
36
00:01:48,693 --> 00:01:51,154
- I'd like for all of us to go
to church and confess our sins.
37
00:01:51,195 --> 00:01:52,572
- No.
- What?
38
00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:54,657
- Can't we just
make a donation?
39
00:01:56,909 --> 00:02:01,247
- The house must be freed
of sin before the party!
40
00:02:01,289 --> 00:02:03,249
Jesus will be here.
41
00:02:04,959 --> 00:02:08,880
Jesus Hernandez, the church's
social media manager.
42
00:02:11,424 --> 00:02:12,967
- Question.
43
00:02:13,009 --> 00:02:15,803
If Nana's getting married
for the second time,
44
00:02:15,845 --> 00:02:19,515
why haven't you two
been married once?
45
00:02:19,557 --> 00:02:21,851
- I did what happened
to my goldfish last week,
46
00:02:21,893 --> 00:02:22,977
so you're up.
47
00:02:24,645 --> 00:02:26,481
- [chuckles uncomfortably]
48
00:02:26,522 --> 00:02:29,567
Gordo, do you remember
when Grandpa sat on you
49
00:02:29,609 --> 00:02:31,235
and it was cute for a minute,
50
00:02:31,277 --> 00:02:34,489
but then
you started suffocating?
51
00:02:34,530 --> 00:02:38,493
That is what marriage is like.
52
00:02:38,534 --> 00:02:43,122
- Marriage farts on your face?
53
00:02:43,164 --> 00:02:46,417
- Yes.
54
00:02:46,459 --> 00:02:48,586
- Marriage is right
for some people.
55
00:02:48,628 --> 00:02:51,047
But for us,
it's just a piece of paper.
56
00:02:51,089 --> 00:02:52,382
- Yeah.
57
00:02:52,423 --> 00:02:53,549
- We're still going
to be together forever.
58
00:02:53,591 --> 00:02:55,718
- [sighs] You guys
should think about it.
59
00:02:55,760 --> 00:02:59,055
Getting farted on
is really funny!
60
00:02:59,097 --> 00:03:03,518
* *
61
00:03:03,559 --> 00:03:06,771
- When you said golf.
I thought you meant mini golf!
62
00:03:06,813 --> 00:03:08,523
Where's the Sphinx?
The Taj Mahal?
63
00:03:08,564 --> 00:03:11,859
The giant shoe?
64
00:03:11,901 --> 00:03:13,403
- I promise
you're going to love this.
65
00:03:13,444 --> 00:03:15,279
Let's start with your stance.
All right.
66
00:03:15,321 --> 00:03:16,489
- Uh.
- Yeah.
67
00:03:16,531 --> 00:03:18,116
[clears throat]
Now spread your legs.
68
00:03:18,157 --> 00:03:20,201
- Hey.
- All right.
69
00:03:20,243 --> 00:03:22,328
Now hit it.
70
00:03:24,330 --> 00:03:28,751
- Do you want me to hit it,
or are you trying to hit it?
71
00:03:28,793 --> 00:03:31,003
- OK, swing.
72
00:03:33,297 --> 00:03:34,924
[glass shattering]
73
00:03:34,966 --> 00:03:36,592
- Uh, oh.
74
00:03:36,634 --> 00:03:38,970
I broke the tail light
of that golf cart.
75
00:03:39,011 --> 00:03:41,639
- Never admit to guilt.
76
00:03:41,681 --> 00:03:43,808
Who's to say
that was your club, huh?
77
00:03:43,850 --> 00:03:48,604
As I say on my billboards,
no evidence, no crime.
78
00:03:48,646 --> 00:03:50,440
- That also works
in the moving business.
79
00:03:50,481 --> 00:03:52,024
"I'm sorry, ma'am,
but there's no evidence
80
00:03:52,066 --> 00:03:54,360
that that table
ever had four legs."
81
00:03:54,402 --> 00:03:56,404
[laughter]
82
00:03:56,446 --> 00:03:59,949
- What are you doing here,
mentiroso?
83
00:03:59,991 --> 00:04:01,367
- I'm sorry.
84
00:04:01,409 --> 00:04:02,952
I've been in AA, so I don't
remember a lot of things.
85
00:04:02,994 --> 00:04:05,329
- Ew. Not you.
86
00:04:05,371 --> 00:04:06,998
Him.
87
00:04:08,499 --> 00:04:11,335
- Uh, Valencia Santo Domingo,
good to see you.
88
00:04:11,377 --> 00:04:14,088
- After what you did to me
last week?
89
00:04:14,130 --> 00:04:18,009
Oy, eres un maldito
guapo cochino sinverguenza.
90
00:04:18,051 --> 00:04:19,427
Eres un desgraciado!
91
00:04:19,469 --> 00:04:21,637
[spits]
92
00:04:23,639 --> 00:04:27,143
- What is Valencia Santa
Domingo talking about?
93
00:04:27,185 --> 00:04:28,352
What happened last week?
94
00:04:28,394 --> 00:04:30,021
- Oh, just another attorney.
- Hmm.
95
00:04:30,063 --> 00:04:31,856
- I want a big judgment
against her client,
96
00:04:31,898 --> 00:04:33,983
and some people are
just sore losers.
97
00:04:34,025 --> 00:04:35,610
It's hard for them
to accept a lawyer
98
00:04:35,651 --> 00:04:39,322
who's beautiful and smart.
99
00:04:39,363 --> 00:04:42,283
I'm like "Legally Blonde."
100
00:04:42,325 --> 00:04:44,118
- You sound legally
full of caca.
101
00:04:44,160 --> 00:04:45,828
- Oh.
102
00:04:45,870 --> 00:04:47,747
- I've had a lot of women
yell at me like that,
103
00:04:47,789 --> 00:04:49,665
and it usually happens right
before their pitbull Ernie
104
00:04:49,707 --> 00:04:53,086
chases you across
all the lanes of the freeway.
105
00:04:53,127 --> 00:04:57,507
You two have history.
106
00:04:57,548 --> 00:04:59,008
- Oh, no.
- Mm.
107
00:04:59,050 --> 00:05:01,094
- We've never dated.
108
00:05:01,135 --> 00:05:04,722
No evidence, no crime.
109
00:05:04,764 --> 00:05:08,101
Come on.
Let's get a drink.
110
00:05:08,142 --> 00:05:13,189
* *
111
00:05:13,231 --> 00:05:15,024
- Oof.
Hey.
112
00:05:15,066 --> 00:05:16,984
- How did your golf date
with Josué go?
113
00:05:17,026 --> 00:05:20,196
- We had a lot in common.
[chuckles]
114
00:05:20,238 --> 00:05:22,782
- Hey, that's great.
115
00:05:22,824 --> 00:05:27,495
- No, Mayan. That's not great.
Have you met me?
116
00:05:27,537 --> 00:05:29,288
In one afternoon,
117
00:05:29,330 --> 00:05:33,209
Josué showed me he's capable
of lying, cheating,
118
00:05:33,251 --> 00:05:37,380
and holding a man too close.
119
00:05:37,422 --> 00:05:38,631
- Your feelings for Mom
120
00:05:38,673 --> 00:05:41,217
are making you see things
that aren't there.
121
00:05:41,259 --> 00:05:44,053
Last week, you tried to make
her jealous, and now this.
122
00:05:44,095 --> 00:05:45,722
- My gut is telling me
123
00:05:45,763 --> 00:05:48,850
that Josué is
rushing your mom into marriage
124
00:05:48,891 --> 00:05:51,227
because he's hiding something.
125
00:05:51,269 --> 00:05:53,104
- Your gut?
126
00:05:53,146 --> 00:05:54,272
Your gut is the reason
127
00:05:54,313 --> 00:05:57,316
I could hold my breath
for three minutes.
128
00:05:57,358 --> 00:05:59,026
Mm-hmm.
129
00:05:59,068 --> 00:06:00,737
I mean,
Mom is an amazing woman.
130
00:06:00,778 --> 00:06:02,697
Of course, Josué would
want to lock it down.
131
00:06:02,739 --> 00:06:04,282
- Trust me, Mayan.
132
00:06:04,323 --> 00:06:09,620
No man ever wants
to lock it down.
133
00:06:09,662 --> 00:06:13,624
Any man that wants
to get married is sus.
134
00:06:16,961 --> 00:06:19,839
- Leave it alone
before you screw everything up.
135
00:06:19,881 --> 00:06:22,592
You also have no proof
that any of this is true.
136
00:06:22,633 --> 00:06:25,178
- All right.
What if I had proof?
137
00:06:25,219 --> 00:06:26,471
- You don't.
138
00:06:26,512 --> 00:06:28,765
This is all in your head,
139
00:06:28,806 --> 00:06:31,976
which explains why
there's so much of it.
140
00:06:32,018 --> 00:06:33,561
* *
141
00:06:37,899 --> 00:06:41,027
[upbeat saxophone music]
142
00:06:41,069 --> 00:06:44,864
- God, I'm here!
143
00:06:44,906 --> 00:06:47,909
Oh, hello, Father Ramirez.
144
00:06:47,950 --> 00:06:53,289
Thank you for making time
for my family of heathens.
145
00:06:54,082 --> 00:06:57,085
- Who's first
to face God's judgment?
146
00:06:57,126 --> 00:06:59,420
Just kidding.
[laughter]
147
00:06:59,462 --> 00:07:02,799
But seriously, if you die
without confessing your sins,
148
00:07:02,840 --> 00:07:08,137
you'll burn for eternity
in the bowels of the beast.
149
00:07:08,179 --> 00:07:11,224
- Will you excuse me
for a moment?
150
00:07:11,265 --> 00:07:12,225
Hey.
151
00:07:12,266 --> 00:07:14,227
- Ah, ah.
- Hey.
152
00:07:14,268 --> 00:07:16,854
- I am not doing this.
153
00:07:16,896 --> 00:07:18,815
- What?
Why?
154
00:07:18,856 --> 00:07:20,775
- Just like you said
about marriage.
155
00:07:20,817 --> 00:07:23,277
Confession might be right
for some people,
156
00:07:23,319 --> 00:07:24,404
but not for me.
157
00:07:24,445 --> 00:07:25,822
- [sighs]
158
00:07:25,863 --> 00:07:27,865
Your nana wants you
to confess,
159
00:07:27,907 --> 00:07:29,075
so you're doing it.
160
00:07:29,117 --> 00:07:30,827
- But Nana also wants
you to be married.
161
00:07:30,868 --> 00:07:34,122
- Start doing it!
- Just go!
162
00:07:36,541 --> 00:07:38,042
- Why are we in church?
163
00:07:38,084 --> 00:07:39,335
When you said "confessions,"
164
00:07:39,377 --> 00:07:43,256
I thought we were gonna
go see Usher.
165
00:07:43,297 --> 00:07:44,799
- I've been planning
to get Josué to tell me
166
00:07:44,841 --> 00:07:46,384
his dirty secrets,
and you're gonna help me
167
00:07:46,426 --> 00:07:49,762
expose that pretty little liar.
168
00:07:49,804 --> 00:07:50,930
- I would love to help you,
169
00:07:50,972 --> 00:07:53,474
but I'm more of
a "Riverdale" guy, so...
170
00:07:53,516 --> 00:07:55,935
* *
171
00:07:55,977 --> 00:07:57,395
- I can't believe
Chance keeps asking us
172
00:07:57,437 --> 00:07:58,604
why we're not married.
173
00:07:58,646 --> 00:07:59,856
I'd be willing
to go second child
174
00:07:59,897 --> 00:08:01,607
to just nip this in the bud.
175
00:08:01,649 --> 00:08:03,067
[sighs]
176
00:08:03,109 --> 00:08:04,777
- We could just get married.
177
00:08:04,819 --> 00:08:08,448
- [laugh]
Yeah, OK.
178
00:08:08,489 --> 00:08:10,908
- [chuckling] Yeah.
Married people are just dumb.
179
00:08:10,950 --> 00:08:12,910
- Yeah.
[chuckles]
180
00:08:15,538 --> 00:08:17,707
- How was it?
Did you confess?
181
00:08:17,749 --> 00:08:19,917
- Yes, but I held one thing in.
182
00:08:19,959 --> 00:08:20,918
- Oh, what's that, Gordo?
183
00:08:20,960 --> 00:08:22,503
- Pee! I really got to go!
184
00:08:22,545 --> 00:08:24,005
- Oh, honey. OK.
185
00:08:32,847 --> 00:08:34,474
- Forgive me, Father,
for I have sinned.
186
00:08:34,515 --> 00:08:35,892
[knocks]
187
00:08:35,933 --> 00:08:36,976
- [imitating woman]
Father Ramirez,
188
00:08:37,018 --> 00:08:40,813
the Vatican is on the line.
189
00:08:40,855 --> 00:08:42,899
- This is probably a prank,
190
00:08:42,940 --> 00:08:46,819
but Lord knows the one time
I don't go, it won't be.
191
00:08:46,861 --> 00:08:48,821
I will return in one moment,
my son.
192
00:09:02,543 --> 00:09:05,421
- And I'm back.
193
00:09:05,463 --> 00:09:08,674
Forgive me, Father,
for I have sinned.
194
00:09:08,716 --> 00:09:11,135
- I already did that.
195
00:09:11,177 --> 00:09:13,638
- Great.
Then we're done here.
196
00:09:13,679 --> 00:09:15,223
Send in the next guy.
197
00:09:15,264 --> 00:09:18,351
The handsome one who seems
like he's hiding secrets,
198
00:09:18,393 --> 00:09:20,144
possibly takes Ozempic.
199
00:09:22,980 --> 00:09:24,315
- There is something
that's been weighing on me.
200
00:09:24,357 --> 00:09:27,151
- [groans]
201
00:09:27,193 --> 00:09:29,112
- Mayan doesn't
believe in marriage,
202
00:09:29,153 --> 00:09:31,364
and I want to support her.
203
00:09:33,908 --> 00:09:37,578
But I also really
want to marry her.
204
00:09:37,620 --> 00:09:40,540
I've wanted to for years.
205
00:09:40,581 --> 00:09:42,959
I know that means
that I will be legally bonded
206
00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:45,002
to her crazy parents.
207
00:09:45,044 --> 00:09:49,132
But I've grown
to love them too.
208
00:09:52,468 --> 00:09:54,762
- You have my blessing
to propose.
209
00:09:56,013 --> 00:09:58,224
Every Mexican family
needs a gringo
210
00:09:58,266 --> 00:10:00,768
to help them fill out
government forms.
211
00:10:02,478 --> 00:10:03,563
- [clears throat]
212
00:10:03,604 --> 00:10:06,232
[knocks on door]
Anybody there?
213
00:10:06,274 --> 00:10:08,901
- Yeah.
- I've heard enough!
214
00:10:08,943 --> 00:10:11,362
Say three "Hail to the Chiefs"
and beat it.
215
00:10:18,119 --> 00:10:19,412
- Forgive me, Father,
for I have sinned.
216
00:10:19,454 --> 00:10:21,247
- Just one second.
[phone beeps]
217
00:10:21,289 --> 00:10:24,709
Go on, you son of--
I mean my son.
218
00:10:24,751 --> 00:10:27,920
- Um, well, I have lied and
betrayed the trust of someone
219
00:10:27,962 --> 00:10:29,255
important in my life.
220
00:10:29,297 --> 00:10:31,591
- I knew it!
221
00:10:31,632 --> 00:10:34,260
I mean God knew it.
222
00:10:34,302 --> 00:10:38,056
Continue loudly
and in great detail.
223
00:10:38,097 --> 00:10:39,182
[upbeat saxophone music]
224
00:10:43,227 --> 00:10:45,188
- Did this betrayal
that you speak of
225
00:10:45,229 --> 00:10:49,525
involve a woman that you know
in the biblical sense?
226
00:10:50,610 --> 00:10:52,070
- It does.
227
00:10:52,111 --> 00:10:54,947
My fiancée Rosie,
she thinks I'm someone I'm not.
228
00:10:54,989 --> 00:10:57,825
- Yes!
Yes!
229
00:10:57,867 --> 00:11:01,245
- But the truth is...
230
00:11:01,287 --> 00:11:04,916
I hate
"The Great British Bake-Off."
231
00:11:04,957 --> 00:11:06,042
- What?
232
00:11:06,084 --> 00:11:08,211
- Oh, their accents
are so annoying!
233
00:11:08,252 --> 00:11:09,921
[British accent]
"Oh, heavens,
234
00:11:09,962 --> 00:11:11,839
"this crumpet has
a soggy bottom.
235
00:11:11,881 --> 00:11:14,050
Ugh!"
236
00:11:14,092 --> 00:11:15,218
[normally]
Thank you, Father.
237
00:11:15,259 --> 00:11:16,177
I feel so much better now.
Thank you.
238
00:11:16,219 --> 00:11:17,929
- Wait, wait, wait!
239
00:11:28,773 --> 00:11:31,359
- [sighs]
240
00:11:31,401 --> 00:11:33,861
Forgive me, Father,
for I have sinned.
241
00:11:33,903 --> 00:11:36,489
- Keep it short,
and keep it clean.
242
00:11:39,158 --> 00:11:41,494
- My son keeps asking me
why I'm not married,
243
00:11:41,536 --> 00:11:45,832
and I'm struggling
to answer him honestly.
244
00:11:45,873 --> 00:11:49,210
I don't want to tell him
that it's all my dad's fault.
245
00:11:49,252 --> 00:11:50,670
- What do you mean?
246
00:11:50,712 --> 00:11:53,256
- He lied.
He cheated.
247
00:11:53,297 --> 00:11:56,134
He abandoned his family.
248
00:11:56,175 --> 00:11:57,593
- The Lord wants me to ask you,
249
00:11:57,635 --> 00:11:59,595
why do you got to bring up
old stuff?
250
00:12:02,932 --> 00:12:08,187
Isn't it possible that your dad
has changed for the better?
251
00:12:08,229 --> 00:12:10,773
- Not really.
252
00:12:10,815 --> 00:12:12,358
He's sober now,
253
00:12:12,400 --> 00:12:16,070
but he's still a screw-up who
screws up everybody's lives.
254
00:12:18,030 --> 00:12:20,324
- You really feel that way?
255
00:12:20,366 --> 00:12:21,993
- Yes.
256
00:12:22,034 --> 00:12:24,203
My mom has finally moved on,
257
00:12:24,245 --> 00:12:26,289
and he's trying
to ruin her relationship
258
00:12:26,330 --> 00:12:28,624
because suddenly,
he wants her back.
259
00:12:28,666 --> 00:12:30,877
He's selfish.
260
00:12:30,918 --> 00:12:34,130
Marriage messes people up,
and it's messed me up,
261
00:12:34,172 --> 00:12:35,757
and I don't want anything
to do with it,
262
00:12:35,798 --> 00:12:38,009
and neither does my partner.
263
00:12:38,051 --> 00:12:40,011
- [imitates buzzer]
Wrong!
264
00:12:41,888 --> 00:12:43,306
Quentin just told me
265
00:12:43,347 --> 00:12:44,557
he's always wanted
to be married to you,
266
00:12:44,599 --> 00:12:49,437
but you're why
he won't propose, not me!
267
00:12:49,479 --> 00:12:50,730
- Dad?
268
00:12:50,772 --> 00:12:52,774
- I think you mean Father!
269
00:12:54,859 --> 00:12:56,903
- What is going on?
270
00:12:56,944 --> 00:12:58,571
And why were you in there?
271
00:13:00,156 --> 00:13:01,532
- I thought there was
a stairway to heaven.
272
00:13:03,534 --> 00:13:06,579
- He's been listening
to everyone's confessions.
273
00:13:06,621 --> 00:13:09,624
- This is sacrilege.
How could you, George?
274
00:13:09,665 --> 00:13:11,751
- I had a good reason.
[chuckles]
275
00:13:11,793 --> 00:13:14,379
Mayan made me do it.
276
00:13:14,420 --> 00:13:15,671
- What?
277
00:13:15,713 --> 00:13:17,840
- You said I needed proof
that Josué was sleazy.
278
00:13:17,882 --> 00:13:19,592
I was getting proof.
279
00:13:19,634 --> 00:13:21,761
- And what did you find?
280
00:13:21,803 --> 00:13:25,390
- I didn't find anything,
281
00:13:25,431 --> 00:13:28,601
except that my daughter
thinks that I'm a screw-up.
282
00:13:28,643 --> 00:13:30,520
But that doesn't mean
I'm wrong about Josué.
283
00:13:30,561 --> 00:13:32,063
I know cheaters.
284
00:13:32,105 --> 00:13:34,357
Ask him about
Valencia Santo Domingo.
285
00:13:34,399 --> 00:13:37,318
- Yeah,
I'll call Carmen Sandiego, too,
286
00:13:37,360 --> 00:13:40,279
and find out where in the world
your brain has gone!
287
00:13:44,075 --> 00:13:45,785
You're a miserable person,
288
00:13:45,827 --> 00:13:49,580
so you want everyone around you
to be miserable too.
289
00:13:51,666 --> 00:13:55,211
George,
I don't want you at my party,
290
00:13:55,253 --> 00:13:57,255
and I don't want you
in my life.
291
00:14:08,391 --> 00:14:11,519
[somber saxophone music]
292
00:14:15,189 --> 00:14:17,275
[George sighs softly]
293
00:14:22,655 --> 00:14:23,948
- George.
294
00:14:23,990 --> 00:14:26,701
Is that beer?
Are you drinking?
295
00:14:26,743 --> 00:14:29,704
- It's near beer.
296
00:14:29,746 --> 00:14:32,915
They were near my mouth.
297
00:14:32,957 --> 00:14:34,417
- You relapsed.
298
00:14:34,459 --> 00:14:37,336
I'm sorry, man.
- Well, that's--well.
299
00:14:38,504 --> 00:14:41,758
Mayan was right about me.
300
00:14:41,799 --> 00:14:43,134
I'm a screw-up.
301
00:14:43,176 --> 00:14:44,927
And I screw up the lives
of everybody who around me.
302
00:14:44,969 --> 00:14:46,429
Why bother being sober?
303
00:14:46,471 --> 00:14:47,805
- So you screwed up.
304
00:14:47,847 --> 00:14:49,348
Your heart was
in the right place,
305
00:14:49,390 --> 00:14:51,059
looking out for Rosie.
306
00:14:51,100 --> 00:14:54,604
- Oh, but I hurt her, too.
[sighs]
307
00:14:54,645 --> 00:14:56,647
I can't have my family
see me like this.
308
00:14:56,689 --> 00:14:57,815
I can't.
309
00:14:57,857 --> 00:15:00,985
- OK, you're gonna stay here,
right?
310
00:15:01,027 --> 00:15:04,739
I'm going to get you some food,
and then...
311
00:15:04,781 --> 00:15:08,701
I guess I'll find
another vehicle to sleep in.
312
00:15:17,001 --> 00:15:20,296
- Time for a toast
to the mergers of our lives,
313
00:15:20,338 --> 00:15:23,800
our businesses,
and our smoking hot bodies.
314
00:15:23,841 --> 00:15:25,259
- [chuckles]
315
00:15:28,513 --> 00:15:30,348
- Before we sign the contract,
316
00:15:30,390 --> 00:15:33,976
I have one more confession
to make.
317
00:15:34,018 --> 00:15:35,186
- Oh.
318
00:15:35,228 --> 00:15:37,021
- George said something.
319
00:15:37,063 --> 00:15:39,565
It got me thinking,
and so I did a little digging.
320
00:15:39,607 --> 00:15:41,692
- Oh, and where
did you bury him?
321
00:15:41,734 --> 00:15:44,487
- [laughs]
322
00:15:44,529 --> 00:15:45,655
See?
323
00:15:45,696 --> 00:15:50,576
You are so charming and funny
324
00:15:50,618 --> 00:15:53,955
that I forgot
to keep my guard up.
325
00:15:53,996 --> 00:15:56,916
- There's no reason to keep
your guard up with me, mi amor.
326
00:15:56,958 --> 00:15:59,377
I have nothing to hide.
327
00:15:59,419 --> 00:16:01,796
- I didn't find anything
on the internet,
328
00:16:01,838 --> 00:16:05,049
but if there's
one thing George knows,
329
00:16:05,091 --> 00:16:07,552
it's red flags.
330
00:16:07,593 --> 00:16:12,849
So I spoke to
Valencia Santo Domingo.
331
00:16:12,890 --> 00:16:15,351
- I'm sorry, Rosie.
I don't know who that is.
332
00:16:15,393 --> 00:16:18,980
- It's a woman
you slept with last week.
333
00:16:20,815 --> 00:16:24,527
She wants me
to give you a message.
334
00:16:25,695 --> 00:16:29,282
"Canalla baboso
ratero payaso!"
335
00:16:29,323 --> 00:16:31,242
[spits]
336
00:16:36,539 --> 00:16:38,124
You slept with her.
337
00:16:38,166 --> 00:16:39,542
You stole from her.
338
00:16:39,584 --> 00:16:42,879
And she didn't know
that you are engaged.
339
00:16:42,920 --> 00:16:45,882
Well, correction.
340
00:16:45,923 --> 00:16:47,300
Were.
341
00:16:52,597 --> 00:16:54,390
- OK, Rosie,
let's talk about this.
342
00:16:54,432 --> 00:16:56,059
You don't have
to listen to her.
343
00:16:56,100 --> 00:16:57,101
She's crazy.
344
00:16:57,143 --> 00:16:58,561
- [chuckles]
Oh.
345
00:16:58,603 --> 00:17:01,564
Is Margarita Candelas
also crazy?
346
00:17:01,606 --> 00:17:04,233
And Yesenia Dontaña?
347
00:17:04,275 --> 00:17:08,738
And Cheryl?
- [gasps]
348
00:17:08,780 --> 00:17:11,074
OK, did any of these women
show you proof?
349
00:17:11,115 --> 00:17:12,533
Because...
350
00:17:12,575 --> 00:17:15,787
no evidence, no crime.
351
00:17:16,954 --> 00:17:18,623
- If you don't leave my house
right now,
352
00:17:18,664 --> 00:17:20,625
I'm gonna show you a crime!
353
00:17:20,666 --> 00:17:22,919
And I'm gonna make sure
that there is no evidence!
354
00:17:22,960 --> 00:17:24,420
- What--
355
00:17:31,386 --> 00:17:33,554
- [sighs]
356
00:17:36,599 --> 00:17:39,310
[somber saxophone music]
357
00:17:42,647 --> 00:17:45,691
[upbeat saxophone music]
358
00:17:47,276 --> 00:17:49,737
- I was looking for you.
359
00:17:49,779 --> 00:17:52,031
What are you doing in here?
360
00:17:52,073 --> 00:17:53,366
- I don't know,
361
00:17:53,408 --> 00:17:56,536
but I woke up with this burger,
so I'm eating it.
362
00:17:59,872 --> 00:18:01,416
- Oh, my g--
363
00:18:01,457 --> 00:18:04,085
are you drunk right now?
364
00:18:04,127 --> 00:18:05,837
- No, I'm not.
365
00:18:05,878 --> 00:18:10,049
And I don't appreciate the two
of you ganging up on me!
366
00:18:10,091 --> 00:18:13,845
- Oh, George,
you've come so far.
367
00:18:13,886 --> 00:18:17,390
I can't believe that you--
[hiccups]
368
00:18:18,683 --> 00:18:21,310
- You only hiccup
when you're wasted.
369
00:18:21,352 --> 00:18:23,896
Are you drunk right now?
370
00:18:23,938 --> 00:18:25,523
- No.
371
00:18:25,565 --> 00:18:27,400
But the other me might be.
372
00:18:34,741 --> 00:18:37,201
- Remember when we used
to get drunk together?
373
00:18:37,243 --> 00:18:38,619
- [chuckles]
374
00:18:38,661 --> 00:18:40,037
- And I would make you laugh
so you would hiccup?
375
00:18:40,079 --> 00:18:41,664
- [hiccups]
376
00:18:41,706 --> 00:18:44,167
- You still do it.
- Oh! [laughs]
377
00:18:48,421 --> 00:18:52,425
You were right.
378
00:18:52,467 --> 00:18:54,218
Josué's a sleazeball.
379
00:18:54,260 --> 00:18:57,055
[sighs]
380
00:18:57,096 --> 00:18:59,390
You were never good
at reading books
381
00:18:59,432 --> 00:19:01,184
or traffic signs
382
00:19:01,225 --> 00:19:06,522
or warning labels on pills.
383
00:19:06,564 --> 00:19:09,984
But you have always been good
384
00:19:10,026 --> 00:19:13,321
at reading other people.
385
00:19:13,362 --> 00:19:14,739
[sighs]
386
00:19:14,781 --> 00:19:18,076
- I'm so sorry, Rosie.
387
00:19:18,117 --> 00:19:19,994
- I feel so stupid.
388
00:19:20,036 --> 00:19:22,371
Why didn't I see the truth
sooner?
389
00:19:22,413 --> 00:19:25,208
- No, he charmed us all,
even me.
390
00:19:25,249 --> 00:19:29,462
He slapped my ass,
and I didn't hate it.
391
00:19:32,173 --> 00:19:36,052
- I appreciate
you looking out for me.
392
00:19:36,094 --> 00:19:39,389
- I'm always gonna
look out for you.
393
00:19:39,430 --> 00:19:40,556
And I'm sorry about
the way that
394
00:19:40,598 --> 00:19:44,769
I've been behaving
these last few weeks.
395
00:19:44,811 --> 00:19:47,605
It's because
I still have feelings for you.
396
00:19:49,148 --> 00:19:51,067
- You really
have feelings for me?
397
00:19:53,027 --> 00:19:54,612
- Mm-hmm.
398
00:19:58,866 --> 00:20:00,368
- I just can't believe
my dad was listening
399
00:20:00,410 --> 00:20:02,036
to all of our confessions.
400
00:20:02,078 --> 00:20:05,623
I said things to him that
I would only say to a priest.
401
00:20:05,665 --> 00:20:08,459
I feel really bad.
He did not deserve that.
402
00:20:08,501 --> 00:20:10,086
- Yeah, we should just, like,
403
00:20:10,128 --> 00:20:12,672
totally forget that the day,
like, ever happened, so...
404
00:20:16,217 --> 00:20:21,222
- Quinten, Dad said that you've
always wanted us to be married.
405
00:20:21,264 --> 00:20:23,683
Is that true?
406
00:20:27,270 --> 00:20:28,521
- I might have bought a ring
407
00:20:28,563 --> 00:20:30,648
the day after you told me
we were pregnant.
408
00:20:30,690 --> 00:20:33,151
- Why didn't you ever tell me?
409
00:20:33,192 --> 00:20:34,861
- Because I know
marriage scares you.
410
00:20:34,902 --> 00:20:39,115
- Well, yeah, it does.
But you know why.
411
00:20:39,157 --> 00:20:42,410
You live with why!
412
00:20:42,452 --> 00:20:45,329
- And this is why I didn't
want to put you in a position
413
00:20:45,371 --> 00:20:49,333
where you felt forced to agree
to something you didn't want.
414
00:20:49,375 --> 00:20:50,877
So I kept the ring,
415
00:20:50,918 --> 00:20:54,714
and I hoped that one day
you might change your mind.
416
00:20:56,340 --> 00:20:58,092
- But what if
I never change my mind?
417
00:21:00,636 --> 00:21:02,221
- I'll still be here.
418
00:21:02,263 --> 00:21:03,806
And so will the ring.
419
00:21:03,848 --> 00:21:06,267
Diamonds are forever.
[chuckles]
420
00:21:06,309 --> 00:21:07,810
- [chuckles]
421
00:21:07,852 --> 00:21:09,520
- And so is the zirconia
422
00:21:09,562 --> 00:21:10,688
I bought at Sears
with my allowance.
423
00:21:10,730 --> 00:21:12,565
- [laughs]
424
00:21:13,483 --> 00:21:16,110
[upbeat saxophone music]
425
00:21:22,241 --> 00:21:25,203
[both scream]
29811
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