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1
00:00:02,268 --> 00:00:04,536
- When are we going
to get there?
2
00:00:04,538 --> 00:00:06,171
- I told you
to go before we leave.
3
00:00:06,173 --> 00:00:09,341
Stop kicking the back
of my seat!
4
00:00:09,343 --> 00:00:11,076
- Ignore him.
5
00:00:11,078 --> 00:00:13,445
He just doesn't
like weddings.
6
00:00:13,447 --> 00:00:18,017
- I had a bad experience once.
7
00:00:18,019 --> 00:00:20,652
- Well, I'm looking forward
to seeing our old neighbors:
8
00:00:20,654 --> 00:00:22,788
The steadmans
and the garinis
9
00:00:22,790 --> 00:00:25,090
And the di vincenzos.
10
00:00:25,092 --> 00:00:27,359
- Which ones
were they again?
11
00:00:27,361 --> 00:00:29,228
- You kicked
in their Halloween pumpkin
12
00:00:29,230 --> 00:00:32,498
'cause you thought it was
a caricature of you.
13
00:00:32,500 --> 00:00:34,466
- Oh, yeah.
14
00:00:34,468 --> 00:00:36,535
- Wait a minute, ma, the garinis
are going to be there?
15
00:00:36,537 --> 00:00:38,537
- Mm-hmm.
- Oh, god.
16
00:00:38,539 --> 00:00:41,407
- What's wrong there,
cubby?
17
00:00:41,409 --> 00:00:43,142
- Uh, forget it.
Nothing. It's stupid.
18
00:00:43,144 --> 00:00:45,744
- I'm sure it is.
Let's hear it.
19
00:00:45,746 --> 00:00:47,613
- I know what it's about.
20
00:00:47,615 --> 00:00:49,581
Raymond and elizabeth garini
had a thing
21
00:00:49,583 --> 00:00:51,350
Back in high school.
22
00:00:51,352 --> 00:00:53,752
- Oh, really?
23
00:00:53,754 --> 00:00:56,522
- It wasn't a thing.
It was one date.
24
00:00:56,524 --> 00:00:58,190
- Well, it could have been
a thing.
25
00:00:58,192 --> 00:01:00,726
Elizabeth had
a big crush on you,
26
00:01:00,728 --> 00:01:04,696
But you were so picky...
Back then.
27
00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:16,141
- So tell me
about this girl, ray.
28
00:01:16,143 --> 00:01:17,743
- She went
to a different high school,
29
00:01:17,745 --> 00:01:20,179
And they were having
their winter dance thing.
30
00:01:20,181 --> 00:01:22,414
- And I heard that elizabeth
thought he was cute
31
00:01:22,416 --> 00:01:24,783
And wanted
to invite him.
32
00:01:24,785 --> 00:01:27,519
- Was she
the blind girl?
33
00:01:27,521 --> 00:01:29,221
- Hey, how would you know,
huh?
34
00:01:29,223 --> 00:01:31,223
You were home
in your footsie pajamas
35
00:01:31,225 --> 00:01:34,660
Asking mom
for more pudding.
36
00:01:34,662 --> 00:01:36,595
I just remember mom saying,
37
00:01:36,597 --> 00:01:38,230
"if elizabeth garini
asks you,
38
00:01:38,232 --> 00:01:40,566
You should go;
it'll be fun."
39
00:01:40,568 --> 00:01:46,405
- Oh, so your mom
was pimping for you.
40
00:01:46,407 --> 00:01:49,641
- I don't like that,
debra.
41
00:01:49,643 --> 00:01:51,777
- So elizabeth calls me and--
and asks me,
42
00:01:51,779 --> 00:01:53,545
And, you know,
what am I going to do?
43
00:01:53,547 --> 00:01:58,383
I kind of feel sorry for her,
so I-I say yes.
44
00:01:58,385 --> 00:02:00,619
Then when we were
at the dance,
45
00:02:00,621 --> 00:02:03,122
It started to snow,
and I had dad's car.
46
00:02:03,124 --> 00:02:04,556
I didn't want anything
to happen to it.
47
00:02:04,558 --> 00:02:07,226
- Damn straight.
48
00:02:07,228 --> 00:02:10,395
- So we get to her house,
and I--
49
00:02:10,397 --> 00:02:12,431
- What? What did you do
to the car?
50
00:02:12,433 --> 00:02:13,565
- Nothing, dad.
51
00:02:13,567 --> 00:02:16,135
- Tell me now.
Stop the lies!
52
00:02:16,137 --> 00:02:19,304
- Nothing happened
to the car, okay?
53
00:02:19,306 --> 00:02:21,306
We were stopped in front
of her parents' house,
54
00:02:21,308 --> 00:02:23,809
And she was saying
she had a nice time
55
00:02:23,811 --> 00:02:26,545
And all that,
but all I can think about
56
00:02:26,547 --> 00:02:28,413
Is getting the car
back to the maniac here.
57
00:02:28,415 --> 00:02:31,150
- Damn straight.
58
00:02:31,152 --> 00:02:32,518
- So we're just
sitting there,
59
00:02:32,520 --> 00:02:35,654
And then finally
elizabeth says,
60
00:02:35,656 --> 00:02:38,257
"okay, bye."
61
00:02:38,259 --> 00:02:41,593
And she gets out
and walks to her door
62
00:02:41,595 --> 00:02:46,398
In the snow
by herself.
63
00:02:46,400 --> 00:02:50,769
I didn't walk her
to the door.
64
00:02:50,771 --> 00:02:53,872
There she was.
65
00:02:53,874 --> 00:02:55,741
All by herself,
66
00:02:55,743 --> 00:02:57,543
Fancy dress,
67
00:02:57,545 --> 00:02:59,845
High heels,
68
00:02:59,847 --> 00:03:03,382
Wobbling
up the driveway.
69
00:03:03,384 --> 00:03:06,351
- So did you call her
and apologize?
70
00:03:06,353 --> 00:03:09,922
- I wanted to,
but then I didn't,
71
00:03:09,924 --> 00:03:11,957
And I kept putting it off,
72
00:03:11,959 --> 00:03:13,258
And then a few days later,
73
00:03:13,260 --> 00:03:15,894
It was too late,
so I just--
74
00:03:15,896 --> 00:03:18,297
I never talked
to her again.
75
00:03:18,299 --> 00:03:21,300
- You would have been
so good together.
76
00:03:24,771 --> 00:03:27,606
Ooh, this place
is beautiful.
77
00:03:27,608 --> 00:03:29,208
- Yeah, yeah.
78
00:03:29,210 --> 00:03:30,509
Where the hell's
our table?
79
00:03:30,511 --> 00:03:32,377
- I don't know.
Let's see.
80
00:03:32,379 --> 00:03:34,780
I'll look for it.
19 anywhere?
81
00:03:34,782 --> 00:03:36,348
- I don't see her.
82
00:03:36,350 --> 00:03:37,783
I don't think she came.
83
00:03:37,785 --> 00:03:39,451
You know, I didn't
see her at the church.
84
00:03:39,453 --> 00:03:40,886
- That's 'cause you
were hiding.
85
00:03:40,888 --> 00:03:45,557
- I wasn't hiding.
I was deep in prayer.
86
00:03:45,559 --> 00:03:46,792
- Whoa, whoa,
is that her?
87
00:03:46,794 --> 00:03:48,660
- Who? Where?
- Uh, wait, no.
88
00:03:48,662 --> 00:03:50,362
It's an old man
with a walker.
89
00:03:50,364 --> 00:03:54,967
Sorry.
My mistake.
90
00:03:54,969 --> 00:03:57,269
- You love this,
don't you?
91
00:03:57,271 --> 00:03:59,638
- I'm afraid I do, yes.
92
00:03:59,640 --> 00:04:01,340
- Just so you know,
there's a part of me
93
00:04:01,342 --> 00:04:03,976
That thinks it would
be good if she was here.
94
00:04:03,978 --> 00:04:06,511
Yeah, just
face this thing head-on.
95
00:04:06,513 --> 00:04:08,280
Okay? How about that?
96
00:04:08,282 --> 00:04:10,449
- There she is!
97
00:04:10,451 --> 00:04:14,653
Uh, nope, sorry,
that's a poached salmon.
98
00:04:14,655 --> 00:04:16,255
Oh, hey, look,
there's our table.
99
00:04:16,257 --> 00:04:17,456
- Oh.
100
00:04:17,458 --> 00:04:19,291
Marie, frank,
we're over here.
101
00:04:19,293 --> 00:04:21,326
- Oh, okay.
102
00:04:21,328 --> 00:04:23,328
- Hey, there, tablemates.
How are you doing?
103
00:04:23,330 --> 00:04:26,031
I'm harry armon.
This is my wife marci.
104
00:04:26,033 --> 00:04:29,301
- What are you
so happy about?
105
00:04:29,303 --> 00:04:32,871
Don't you see this table
placement is an insult?
106
00:04:32,873 --> 00:04:34,773
They stuck us in the corner
by the kitchen.
107
00:04:34,775 --> 00:04:36,575
- Come on.
It's fine, frank.
108
00:04:36,577 --> 00:04:37,909
- No, it's not fine.
109
00:04:37,911 --> 00:04:40,979
We're at table 19
out of 20 tables,
110
00:04:40,981 --> 00:04:42,514
And table 20 is filled
111
00:04:42,516 --> 00:04:46,551
With embarrassing
family nut jobs.
112
00:04:46,553 --> 00:04:48,587
No offense.
113
00:04:50,456 --> 00:04:53,725
- So three couples
and me.
114
00:04:53,727 --> 00:04:56,428
On this joyous day
of love and togetherness,
115
00:04:56,430 --> 00:05:00,065
The cheese stands alone.
116
00:05:00,067 --> 00:05:03,335
- You're not alone.
You have us.
117
00:05:03,337 --> 00:05:05,604
- Super.
118
00:05:05,606 --> 00:05:07,039
- Hey, robert,
don't look now.
119
00:05:07,041 --> 00:05:08,807
I think that woman's
giving you the eye.
120
00:05:08,809 --> 00:05:11,810
Oh, no,
it's the finger, sorry.
121
00:05:24,991 --> 00:05:27,993
- You are
a teeny-weeny man.
122
00:05:29,662 --> 00:05:31,930
- Hey, ray, let's dance.
123
00:05:31,932 --> 00:05:33,398
- No, no, come on.
We just got here.
124
00:05:33,400 --> 00:05:34,933
- No, come on. One song.
125
00:05:34,935 --> 00:05:36,635
- I can't dance.
I didn't eat; I'll faint.
126
00:05:36,637 --> 00:05:37,903
- You danced
with that elizabeth.
127
00:05:37,905 --> 00:05:39,071
You can dance with me.
128
00:05:39,073 --> 00:05:40,872
- Oh, come on.
- Let's go.
129
00:05:40,874 --> 00:05:42,441
- My father's going
to eat your salad.
130
00:05:42,443 --> 00:05:44,076
- All right.
131
00:05:50,383 --> 00:05:52,751
- You got, like,
a fuzzy in your hair.
132
00:05:52,753 --> 00:05:55,587
- Mm.
133
00:05:55,589 --> 00:05:56,955
- You got
a whole bunch of them.
134
00:05:56,957 --> 00:06:00,425
- Would you please,
please stop grooming me?
135
00:06:00,427 --> 00:06:02,394
- Okay.
136
00:06:02,396 --> 00:06:03,929
Sorry I care about you.
137
00:06:03,931 --> 00:06:05,931
- Raymond?
138
00:06:05,933 --> 00:06:08,967
Hi, it's elizabeth...
Garini.
139
00:06:08,969 --> 00:06:13,071
- Elizabeth ga-who?
140
00:06:13,073 --> 00:06:16,408
- Garini,
from the neighborhood.
141
00:06:16,410 --> 00:06:19,711
- Oh, yes, yeah, hi.
Hi, nice to see you.
142
00:06:19,713 --> 00:06:22,447
Okay. Take care.
143
00:06:22,449 --> 00:06:24,683
- Hi, I'm debra,
ray's wife.
144
00:06:24,685 --> 00:06:27,452
- Nice to meet you.
This is my husband scott.
145
00:06:27,454 --> 00:06:30,722
- Hey, how ya doing?
- Okay. Yeah.
146
00:06:30,724 --> 00:06:33,692
All right, well, good-bye.
All right.
147
00:06:33,694 --> 00:06:36,628
- Good to see you. Have fun.
- Okay.
148
00:06:36,630 --> 00:06:38,964
- Oh, very smooth, ray.
149
00:06:38,966 --> 00:06:40,465
- It's just--
I don't--
150
00:06:40,467 --> 00:06:42,567
It was a shock
to see her.
151
00:06:42,569 --> 00:06:44,770
- Yeah, well,
she was really broken up
152
00:06:44,772 --> 00:06:48,473
About you not walking her
to the door.
153
00:06:48,475 --> 00:06:50,075
- Seriously?
Did you pick up on that?
154
00:06:50,077 --> 00:06:52,611
Come on,
don't joke around!
155
00:06:52,613 --> 00:06:54,679
- Honey, she was fine.
156
00:06:54,681 --> 00:06:57,749
She came up to you.
You can stop obsessing now.
157
00:06:57,751 --> 00:06:59,017
- You're right.
158
00:06:59,019 --> 00:07:00,452
You're right.
She came up to me.
159
00:07:00,454 --> 00:07:02,854
Okay. Good.
160
00:07:04,724 --> 00:07:06,191
- What?
161
00:07:06,193 --> 00:07:08,160
- I feel like I should have
brought up the incident
162
00:07:08,162 --> 00:07:10,128
And apologized.
- All right, so do it.
163
00:07:10,130 --> 00:07:12,597
- Really? No.
Yeah? No.
164
00:07:12,599 --> 00:07:14,599
- Ray, you are so annoying!
165
00:07:14,601 --> 00:07:16,668
- No, look, I haven't had time
to prepare my remarks.
166
00:07:16,670 --> 00:07:19,004
- You've had 25 years for that.
Hi again.
167
00:07:19,006 --> 00:07:20,939
- We've got to stop
meeting like this.
168
00:07:20,941 --> 00:07:22,974
okay.
169
00:07:31,551 --> 00:07:33,151
You know what?
170
00:07:33,153 --> 00:07:35,086
I'll bet you probably
don't even remember this.
171
00:07:35,088 --> 00:07:36,855
We went out one time
in high school.
172
00:07:36,857 --> 00:07:39,724
- Of course. I remember.
- Yeah?
173
00:07:39,726 --> 00:07:43,495
Hey, don't worry, man.
Nothing happened.
174
00:07:43,497 --> 00:07:46,064
- That must have been,
like, 25 years ago.
175
00:07:46,066 --> 00:07:47,766
- Yeah, I think it was.
176
00:07:47,768 --> 00:07:50,469
I think--I think
it was snowing back then.
177
00:07:50,471 --> 00:07:52,771
It was, it was snowing
'cause I remember
178
00:07:52,773 --> 00:07:55,540
I was nervous
about the car,
179
00:07:55,542 --> 00:07:58,577
And something--
there was--what happened?
180
00:07:58,579 --> 00:08:00,245
Somebody
didn't walk somebody--
181
00:08:05,184 --> 00:08:09,654
I think I didn't walk you
to your door, yeah.
182
00:08:09,656 --> 00:08:12,157
Because I was nervous
about the car and the snow.
183
00:08:12,159 --> 00:08:14,826
Right? I remember,
but that's no excuse.
184
00:08:14,828 --> 00:08:16,995
You know what?
I should apologize for that.
185
00:08:16,997 --> 00:08:19,898
I was a stupid kid
with the snow.
186
00:08:19,900 --> 00:08:22,601
So listen,
187
00:08:22,603 --> 00:08:26,271
I'm sorry for that.
188
00:08:26,273 --> 00:08:29,674
- Wow.
189
00:08:29,676 --> 00:08:33,678
I don't really
remember that, but...
190
00:08:37,116 --> 00:08:40,085
It's so sweet of you
to apologize.
191
00:08:40,087 --> 00:08:41,653
Gosh, I hope
you haven't been waiting
192
00:08:41,655 --> 00:08:42,921
Since high school
to tell me that.
193
00:08:45,092 --> 00:08:47,592
- No, no, no.
194
00:08:47,594 --> 00:08:49,060
No, I mean,
couldn't you tell?
195
00:08:49,062 --> 00:08:51,863
It was all coming back
to me as I was saying it.
196
00:08:51,865 --> 00:08:55,066
- Oh, gee, well, thanks
for being so thoughtful.
197
00:08:55,068 --> 00:08:59,004
- Yeah, well, hey,
that's me, mr. Thoughtful.
198
00:08:59,006 --> 00:09:02,307
Okay.
Bye.
199
00:09:02,309 --> 00:09:06,111
- And here I mistook you
for mr. Potato head.
200
00:09:06,113 --> 00:09:08,914
- I-I saw you talking
to elizabeth.
201
00:09:08,916 --> 00:09:10,582
- I did. I did. I did.
202
00:09:10,584 --> 00:09:12,284
I apologized for the incident,
and she was fine.
203
00:09:12,286 --> 00:09:13,852
- Oh, that's wonderful.
204
00:09:13,854 --> 00:09:18,657
- Yeah, maybe they can
finally work things out.
205
00:09:18,659 --> 00:09:19,858
- You know what?
206
00:09:19,860 --> 00:09:21,660
That wasn't that bad.
207
00:09:21,662 --> 00:09:24,095
I mean, she's happy, right?
She's got a husband.
208
00:09:24,097 --> 00:09:25,597
- Oh, yeah?
209
00:09:25,599 --> 00:09:28,333
All that happened in front
of her husband?
210
00:09:28,335 --> 00:09:30,802
- Yeah. What?
211
00:09:30,804 --> 00:09:32,904
- Nothing.
212
00:09:32,906 --> 00:09:35,307
- What?
What are you saying?
213
00:09:35,309 --> 00:09:37,642
That maybe she was--
she was putting on an act
214
00:09:37,644 --> 00:09:39,344
In front
of her husband there?
215
00:09:39,346 --> 00:09:42,581
- Well,
I wasn't saying that,
216
00:09:42,583 --> 00:09:44,950
But that's good.
217
00:09:44,952 --> 00:09:46,618
You should run with that.
218
00:09:46,620 --> 00:09:48,987
- No, no, no, no, you bring up
a good point here.
219
00:09:48,989 --> 00:09:51,756
- Oh, would you knock it off?
She's fine.
220
00:09:51,758 --> 00:09:53,124
- I think
she was overly fine.
221
00:09:53,126 --> 00:09:54,626
- Oh, please.
222
00:09:54,628 --> 00:09:56,628
- No, no, come on.
This was a big incident.
223
00:09:56,630 --> 00:09:58,630
- Would you stop calling it
"the incident"?
224
00:09:58,632 --> 00:10:00,899
It wasn't an incident.
225
00:10:00,901 --> 00:10:04,603
All right, cuban missile crisis
was an incident.
226
00:10:04,605 --> 00:10:06,071
My god,
if you are this insane
227
00:10:06,073 --> 00:10:07,973
About not walking a girl
to the door,
228
00:10:07,975 --> 00:10:09,941
How do you feel
about what you do to me?
229
00:10:09,943 --> 00:10:11,276
- What?
What do I do to you?
230
00:10:11,278 --> 00:10:12,911
- God, you do jerky things
all the time,
231
00:10:12,913 --> 00:10:14,212
Things you should
really regret.
232
00:10:14,214 --> 00:10:15,680
- Oh, yeah, well, like what?
233
00:10:15,682 --> 00:10:17,215
- Oh, where do you want me
to start?
234
00:10:17,217 --> 00:10:21,987
- At the beginning.
235
00:10:21,989 --> 00:10:24,289
Take your time.
236
00:10:24,291 --> 00:10:26,658
How about not walking me
to the car
237
00:10:26,660 --> 00:10:28,693
When I was in labor
with the twins, ray?
238
00:10:28,695 --> 00:10:30,261
How about that incident?
239
00:10:30,263 --> 00:10:31,696
- I had to make
a sandwich, okay?
240
00:10:31,698 --> 00:10:35,066
I hate hospital food.
- God.
241
00:10:35,068 --> 00:10:37,335
Honestly,
I-I can't believe you.
242
00:10:37,337 --> 00:10:39,371
- Why don't we
go mingle, honey?
243
00:10:39,373 --> 00:10:42,374
Purse--
get your purse.
244
00:10:55,354 --> 00:10:57,422
- All right, don't be mad.
I'm sorry, okay?
245
00:10:57,424 --> 00:10:58,823
- I want you
to tell me something
246
00:10:58,825 --> 00:11:01,259
That you regret
doing to me.
247
00:11:01,261 --> 00:11:02,727
- Come on.
We're at a wedding.
248
00:11:02,729 --> 00:11:04,696
- Something
you've done to me
249
00:11:04,698 --> 00:11:07,198
That makes you feel
as horrible as you do
250
00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:10,935
About your date
from 1977.
251
00:11:10,937 --> 00:11:12,971
- Uncle robert,
come dance with us.
252
00:11:12,973 --> 00:11:14,673
- I'll go.
- Ray.
253
00:11:14,675 --> 00:11:16,808
- Robert, dance with them.
- I want to see this.
254
00:11:16,810 --> 00:11:18,977
- Go dance with the children
right now.
255
00:11:18,979 --> 00:11:21,279
- All right!
256
00:11:21,281 --> 00:11:24,282
Come on, kids!
257
00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:43,735
- Regret, please?
258
00:11:43,737 --> 00:11:45,103
- Okay.
259
00:11:45,105 --> 00:11:48,807
All right, I regret
not loving you more.
260
00:11:48,809 --> 00:11:50,141
Yes.
261
00:11:50,143 --> 00:11:51,943
Yes, you deserve
all the love
262
00:11:51,945 --> 00:11:54,179
That can fit in the ocean.
263
00:11:57,250 --> 00:11:59,918
Oh, man.
264
00:11:59,920 --> 00:12:02,420
- I thought
that was beautiful, frank.
265
00:12:02,422 --> 00:12:06,157
Why can't you say
something like that?
266
00:12:06,159 --> 00:12:08,126
- All right.
267
00:12:10,397 --> 00:12:13,398
I would love it
if you were in the ocean.
268
00:12:23,008 --> 00:12:24,909
- I want
something specific,
269
00:12:24,911 --> 00:12:26,845
Something like when you didn't
walk me to the car
270
00:12:26,847 --> 00:12:28,079
When I was in labor.
271
00:12:28,081 --> 00:12:29,280
- Okay, okay,
can I use that one?
272
00:12:29,282 --> 00:12:31,483
- No.
273
00:12:31,485 --> 00:12:34,119
- I did it more than once.
- No. Come on.
274
00:12:34,121 --> 00:12:35,286
- Okay, all right, all right.
275
00:12:35,288 --> 00:12:38,790
Regret, regret.
Um, uh--
276
00:12:38,792 --> 00:12:41,092
Okay, all right,
when we were first married,
277
00:12:41,094 --> 00:12:43,428
We went to a party
at my editor's house,
278
00:12:43,430 --> 00:12:46,898
And you didn't know anybody,
and you were kind of nervous,
279
00:12:46,900 --> 00:12:50,001
And later at dinner,
you told a story
280
00:12:50,003 --> 00:12:52,337
That you thought
was going to be funny,
281
00:12:52,339 --> 00:12:55,774
But it--
nobody laughed.
282
00:12:55,776 --> 00:12:59,077
- So you regret
that I'm a stiff at parties?
283
00:12:59,079 --> 00:13:00,378
Thanks.
Feeling better.
284
00:13:00,380 --> 00:13:02,947
- No.
No, no, listen.
285
00:13:02,949 --> 00:13:06,017
They didn't laugh,
but neither did I.
286
00:13:06,019 --> 00:13:07,786
I saw that
you were embarrassed,
287
00:13:07,788 --> 00:13:12,423
And I should have been there
for you, and I wasn't.
288
00:13:12,425 --> 00:13:15,994
Yeah, I've--
I've always regretted that.
289
00:13:15,996 --> 00:13:17,862
- Wow.
290
00:13:17,864 --> 00:13:21,800
That--that must have been
a long time ago.
291
00:13:21,802 --> 00:13:24,135
Such a small thing.
292
00:13:24,137 --> 00:13:28,807
- Yeah, well,
tell that to my conscience.
293
00:13:28,809 --> 00:13:30,375
- I'd ask you
what you regret,
294
00:13:30,377 --> 00:13:31,976
But I'd be afraid
you'd say
295
00:13:31,978 --> 00:13:33,545
You regret marrying me.
296
00:13:33,547 --> 00:13:35,280
- Aw...
297
00:13:35,282 --> 00:13:38,249
Not all the time.
298
00:13:41,954 --> 00:13:45,824
- Okay, I'm back.
I'm back.
299
00:13:45,826 --> 00:13:49,027
What, it's over?
300
00:13:49,029 --> 00:13:53,298
Frickin' bunny hop.
301
00:13:53,300 --> 00:13:59,003
- It's funny,
talking about regrets.
302
00:13:59,005 --> 00:14:02,006
I've got regrets.
303
00:14:05,578 --> 00:14:09,547
Probably too many regrets
to mention.
304
00:14:09,549 --> 00:14:12,951
- Okay, then.
305
00:14:12,953 --> 00:14:14,519
- I-I've--
306
00:14:14,521 --> 00:14:16,487
I've done things that I just
feel terrible about
307
00:14:16,489 --> 00:14:17,989
To all of you.
308
00:14:17,991 --> 00:14:21,526
- All right, ma.
- Wait. Let her speak.
309
00:14:21,528 --> 00:14:23,928
- Like to you, debra.
310
00:14:23,930 --> 00:14:25,563
I've always regretted
311
00:14:25,565 --> 00:14:27,332
Not being
more nurturing to you
312
00:14:27,334 --> 00:14:30,501
When you first started out
as a wife and a mother.
313
00:14:30,503 --> 00:14:32,070
I am sorry.
314
00:14:32,072 --> 00:14:33,972
- Oh, marie.
315
00:14:33,974 --> 00:14:35,373
That's nice.
316
00:14:35,375 --> 00:14:40,245
- Because now at this point,
what can I do?
317
00:14:48,153 --> 00:14:51,189
- It must feel good
to get that off your chest.
318
00:14:51,191 --> 00:14:55,026
- Yeah, it does feel good.
319
00:14:55,028 --> 00:14:56,394
And--
and, raymond?
320
00:14:56,396 --> 00:14:58,029
I've always regretted
321
00:14:58,031 --> 00:15:01,966
Not toughening you up
when you were a boy.
322
00:15:01,968 --> 00:15:05,270
- I'm tough.
323
00:15:05,272 --> 00:15:08,339
- No, you're not.
324
00:15:10,442 --> 00:15:12,010
- And, robert?
325
00:15:12,012 --> 00:15:15,413
- Yes?
326
00:15:15,415 --> 00:15:17,382
- Actually,
I don't have any regrets
327
00:15:17,384 --> 00:15:20,985
About how I raised you,
dear.
328
00:15:20,987 --> 00:15:24,422
- You've got to be kidding.
329
00:15:24,424 --> 00:15:28,326
- And, frank...
330
00:15:28,328 --> 00:15:31,496
Some regrets speak
for themselves.
331
00:15:34,700 --> 00:15:37,235
- Enough with all this crap.
332
00:15:37,237 --> 00:15:40,004
Regret is
a waste of time.
333
00:15:40,006 --> 00:15:41,439
My father used to be
working on the road
334
00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:43,041
40 weeks a year.
335
00:15:43,043 --> 00:15:44,342
When he'd come back home,
you think
336
00:15:44,344 --> 00:15:46,511
He had time for regrets?
337
00:15:46,513 --> 00:15:48,479
He'd have a drink,
punish me for whatever I did,
338
00:15:48,481 --> 00:15:52,283
And then hit the road again.
339
00:15:52,285 --> 00:15:53,685
Okay,
so what am I going to do,
340
00:15:53,687 --> 00:15:55,153
Ask him to quit his job,
341
00:15:55,155 --> 00:15:58,723
So he can play with me
or something?
342
00:15:58,725 --> 00:16:01,626
- Oh, frank.
343
00:16:01,628 --> 00:16:03,728
- What?
344
00:16:03,730 --> 00:16:06,531
- You never told me
anything about this.
345
00:16:06,533 --> 00:16:09,167
See, it's good to talk.
346
00:16:09,169 --> 00:16:11,002
Come on, open up to me.
347
00:16:11,004 --> 00:16:12,570
I'm here for you.
348
00:16:12,572 --> 00:16:16,240
- Okay, look, I was lying
about my old man.
349
00:16:16,242 --> 00:16:17,575
He was a jolly guy
350
00:16:17,577 --> 00:16:19,344
Who gave me puppies
and chocolate coins,
351
00:16:19,346 --> 00:16:24,182
So, uh, just slide
back over, okay?
352
00:16:34,760 --> 00:16:39,097
- Ma, are you saying that you
have no regrets about me?
353
00:16:39,099 --> 00:16:42,000
- Please, robert,
not everything is about you.
354
00:16:42,002 --> 00:16:44,669
- Nothing is about me!
355
00:16:44,671 --> 00:16:47,438
Nothing!
356
00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:49,173
Let me tell you something.
I got regrets.
357
00:16:49,175 --> 00:16:51,576
Oh, boy,
do I got regrets.
358
00:16:51,578 --> 00:16:54,412
- Come on, robbie,
you're bringing everybody down.
359
00:16:54,414 --> 00:16:58,383
- Everybody else got to go.
I'm going.
360
00:16:58,385 --> 00:17:01,085
Let's see, regrets.
361
00:17:01,087 --> 00:17:03,788
Hmm, quite a menu.
362
00:17:06,558 --> 00:17:08,092
Where shall I start?
363
00:17:08,094 --> 00:17:11,095
- How about that haircut?
364
00:17:16,769 --> 00:17:19,070
- All right.
365
00:17:19,072 --> 00:17:23,441
There is something
I always felt bad about.
366
00:17:23,443 --> 00:17:25,276
When joanne and I
were first going out,
367
00:17:25,278 --> 00:17:29,313
I took her to this party
at my sergeant's house.
368
00:17:29,315 --> 00:17:32,450
And at dinner she started
to tell this joke,
369
00:17:32,452 --> 00:17:35,386
And I guess she thought
it was pretty funny,
370
00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:39,257
But nobody else did,
and no one laughed.
371
00:17:39,259 --> 00:17:41,759
Which would have been
one thing,
372
00:17:41,761 --> 00:17:46,130
But I didn't laugh either.
373
00:17:46,132 --> 00:17:48,533
She just sat there,
embarrassed.
374
00:17:48,535 --> 00:17:50,301
I mean,
what kind of a guy--
375
00:17:50,303 --> 00:17:52,770
- You used his regret?
376
00:17:55,441 --> 00:17:57,842
You couldn't think
of one thing on your own,
377
00:17:57,844 --> 00:18:00,511
So you had
to steal his regret?
378
00:18:00,513 --> 00:18:04,115
You stole his regret!
379
00:18:04,117 --> 00:18:07,485
- You stole my regret?
380
00:18:07,487 --> 00:18:09,320
- Well, I definitely have
something I regret
381
00:18:09,322 --> 00:18:13,324
Doing to you now,
soda pop.
382
00:18:13,326 --> 00:18:15,226
Oh, come on. All right.
Look, I'm sorry.
383
00:18:15,228 --> 00:18:16,527
I'm sorry. Come on.
384
00:18:16,529 --> 00:18:18,162
Stop it.
What do you want me to say?
385
00:18:18,164 --> 00:18:20,198
- She's on the move, chief.
386
00:18:23,102 --> 00:18:24,836
- Come on.
387
00:18:24,838 --> 00:18:27,305
Would you stop it?
Please stop.
388
00:18:27,307 --> 00:18:29,107
- I'll have another one.
- Listen.
389
00:18:29,109 --> 00:18:31,142
All right, all right,
I couldn't think of a regret,
390
00:18:31,144 --> 00:18:33,377
But it was like a pop quiz;
I panicked, okay?
391
00:18:33,379 --> 00:18:35,313
But you win.
I'm a bad person.
392
00:18:35,315 --> 00:18:37,248
- How do I win?
393
00:18:38,418 --> 00:18:40,551
Oh, they're kissing.
394
00:18:40,553 --> 00:18:42,186
You know what would
make me happy?
395
00:18:42,188 --> 00:18:45,256
If you recognized
a regret before you did it!
396
00:18:45,258 --> 00:18:46,557
- Oh, what,
time travel, huh?
397
00:18:46,559 --> 00:18:47,892
You're talking
about time travel.
398
00:18:47,894 --> 00:18:49,427
- All right, stop.
Stop everything.
399
00:18:49,429 --> 00:18:50,595
I have another regret.
400
00:18:50,597 --> 00:18:52,263
- Oh, ma,
enough with the regrets!
401
00:18:52,265 --> 00:18:53,831
- No, no, no,
you're yelling at one another.
402
00:18:53,833 --> 00:18:55,666
And it's all my fault.
- It's all right, marie.
403
00:18:55,668 --> 00:18:57,301
- No, there's something
you don't know
404
00:18:57,303 --> 00:18:58,736
About this whole
elizabeth business.
405
00:19:08,547 --> 00:19:11,549
You know how I do things
out of love?
406
00:19:13,852 --> 00:19:16,787
- Oh, this is never good.
407
00:19:19,591 --> 00:19:21,626
- When you were
in high school, raymond,
408
00:19:21,628 --> 00:19:22,727
You were so lonely.
409
00:19:22,729 --> 00:19:25,596
I just wanted
you to be happy.
410
00:19:25,598 --> 00:19:28,499
- What did you do?
411
00:19:28,501 --> 00:19:30,501
- Everything I told you
about elizabeth
412
00:19:30,503 --> 00:19:32,737
Back in high school,
413
00:19:32,739 --> 00:19:35,806
Thinking you were cute
and having a crush on you
414
00:19:35,808 --> 00:19:39,610
Was a fib.
415
00:19:39,612 --> 00:19:42,246
- What do you--
you lied to me?
416
00:19:42,248 --> 00:19:44,182
- Fibbed.
417
00:19:44,184 --> 00:19:45,783
- Wait a minute.
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
418
00:19:45,785 --> 00:19:47,351
She had to like me
a little bit
419
00:19:47,353 --> 00:19:49,620
Because she asked me out,
right, right?
420
00:19:49,622 --> 00:19:51,656
- See, I ran into elizabeth
in the market,
421
00:19:51,658 --> 00:19:54,759
And I asked her if she would
please ask you out to the dance.
422
00:19:57,764 --> 00:19:59,897
- At first she said no,
but then I told her
423
00:19:59,899 --> 00:20:02,934
That you were polite and kind
and a nice dresser.
424
00:20:02,936 --> 00:20:04,702
- A pity date?
425
00:20:04,704 --> 00:20:06,971
All this time, I was--
I was a pity date?
426
00:20:06,973 --> 00:20:08,639
- No, not at all.
427
00:20:08,641 --> 00:20:09,907
- Of course I was!
- No.
428
00:20:09,909 --> 00:20:11,342
- I guess I was right,
raymond.
429
00:20:11,344 --> 00:20:12,710
When she accepted
your apology,
430
00:20:12,712 --> 00:20:13,878
She was putting on an act.
431
00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:16,314
She had
to keep from laughing.
432
00:20:17,917 --> 00:20:19,550
- You couldn't
walk her to the door
433
00:20:19,552 --> 00:20:21,385
'cause she was running
for the door.
434
00:20:22,689 --> 00:20:23,988
- That's very funny.
Very funny.
435
00:20:23,990 --> 00:20:26,390
Very funny!
Very funny!
436
00:20:29,395 --> 00:20:30,494
No, no, I don't want--
437
00:20:30,496 --> 00:20:34,432
Get off me, you freaks!
438
00:20:34,434 --> 00:20:35,633
- Oh, hi, raymond.
- Yeah, yeah.
439
00:20:35,635 --> 00:20:37,568
I just found something out.
440
00:20:37,570 --> 00:20:39,737
You didn't want me to walk you
to the door, did you, right?
441
00:20:39,739 --> 00:20:41,639
You weren't acting weird
because you liked me.
442
00:20:41,641 --> 00:20:43,274
You were acting weird
because you
443
00:20:43,276 --> 00:20:44,842
Were going out
with mama's little mutant!
444
00:20:44,844 --> 00:20:46,410
I've felt bad
about what I did to you
445
00:20:46,412 --> 00:20:47,878
For 25 years for no reason.
446
00:20:47,880 --> 00:20:49,680
You weren't
the pathetic loser!
447
00:20:49,682 --> 00:20:52,950
I was the pathetic loser!
448
00:21:01,627 --> 00:21:04,962
- That's the schmuck who didn't
walk you to the door?
449
00:21:14,940 --> 00:21:18,809
- What's wrong
with my haircut?
450
00:21:18,811 --> 00:21:20,911
- All right,
I'm sorry.
451
00:21:20,913 --> 00:21:23,981
I had a rough night,
okay?
452
00:21:30,522 --> 00:21:33,691
- You want to drive to the woods
and dump dad out?
453
00:21:42,334 --> 00:21:45,403
- Rub some honey on his ass,
and blow a bear whistle.
32049
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