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Original subtitles

[Jenny] Previously on Dead Boy Detectives...

I have feelings for you too.

I wasn't talking about you.

[woman] One Edwin Payne.

Afterlife assignment: Hell.

Escaped.

Escaped?

Hell?

Sorry. Technically, you're a sacrifice.

[Edwin screaming]

I've come for the two dead boys. Come now.

I'm not going back to hell.

[both grunting]

[screaming]

[Angie growling]

- [gasps] - And I always get what I want!

[roars]

I don't know how to stop him.

I'll take this.

What do you plan on doing with that?

[Esther] Uh, let's call it a revenge starter kit.

My little baby is coming of age.

I may have set up a date for you two. Here. Tonight.

[Jenny] You found my secret admirer?

Oh, my God.

โ™ช Who's your girl? โ™ช

โ™ช Midnight making โ™ช

โ™ช Moonlight breaking... โ™ช

[knock at door]

Oh. I was hoping you were Jenny.

Sure. Because Jenny usually hangs in your room for girl talk.

Well, we haven't talked or even made eye contact

since the whole psycho date-murder happened.

Oh.

Is that why you silenced your toxic friends and redecorated?

Love is way less romantic and way more stabby than I thought.

I couldn't agree more.

Is this about you kissing Charles?

Wait, he told you that?

It... It doesn't matter.

This is about David.

I need to be done with him and get him out of my head.

But you can't be done with him. Doesn't he still have your memories?

Why miss a life I don't remember?

The life I have now is finally going well.

I have friends. I'm helping people. What more do I need?

Maybe, um, you need to figure out who you are.

This sounds like you're trying to convince yourself.

Just...

I'm gonna try a new approach, okay?

And I need your help or support.

So will you help me or not?

All right, I'm in. What's the plan?

Been looking for the Washer Woman every single night, and nothing.

I guess the green sea glass doesn't mean emotional stability.

Ayup.

Sorry, we're here to block a demon from coming into my head.

What do you have for that?

Ah, demons are tricky.

Uh...

Unless you were romantically involved with this demon.

Uh, what does that have to do with anything?

I'll take that as a yes.

That's good news. Got the perfect item.

It's called the Light of Heart.

[Niko] Sounds nice,

if love wasn't a lie that brutally ends in violence.

What does it do?

It protects you from the repercussions of toxic entanglements.

One-time use, $100.

What the hell?

I have to pay my rent.

I can't be a homeless person with a heart-shaped gem.

My mom gave this to me for emergencies, and this is definitely an emergency.

You should be careful what you wish for.

I was once a mighty walrus,

free in the ocean. I too had a wish.

Can you just ring us up? Please.

Yes, Mick. We'd like to hear your story.

Unless it's a love story.

No.

It's just tragic.

One day, long, long ago,

a terrible storm raged over land and sea.

A girl and her father were in peril.

The man thought if he sacrificed his daughter,

- he may be saved by the great gods. - [girl whimpers]

[gasps]

[thunderclap]

[girl shrieks]

[screams]

[Tragic Mick] But seeing such cruelty, the great gods forsook the father

and took pity on the girl,

turning her into Sedna, the goddess of the sea.

And on that day,

my brothers and sisters were born.

Sedna took care of us.

We had plenty to eat, and we were happy.

But I yearned for more.

One day, a boat docked to the land.

I was drawn to the ways of people.

But Sedna was all too familiar with the darkness of humans,

and she was clear.

If I left the sea, I'd never return.

But I wanted to know what it was like to live a different life.

And Sedna

granted that wish.

[thunderclap]

I never saw my family or Sedna again.

- Heavy. - Wow.

Ayup.

Anyway, good luck with the demon.

Here are the instructions.

[Niko] Okay.

Close your eyes, state what you want two times.

[sighs] I got him out of my body but he keeps sneaking back in, so...

I wanna keep this demon the fuck out.

Mmm. More specifics, less profanity.

[Crystal sighs]

I wanna keep David out of my head.

I wanna keep David out of my head.

[breathing heavily]

[distorted voices]

[voices stop]

Did it... Did it work?

I don't know.

God, I just wanna be normal.

Is that a good thing or a bad thing?

Okay, now, something is... It is different.

I can't hear the voices.

Niko?

I think my powers are gone.

What is that smell?

Revenge. [chuckles]

Breathe it in, Monty. Let it fill your lungs.

Still seems a little small.

Why don't you just worry about luring

those little detective boys into the forest, huh?

And then one wrong step

into the right spot, and...

[tongue flutters]

[chuckles]

...they'll be gone forever.

And, uh, what about the girl?

Oh, God.

Without her precious little dead boys, she'll be snake food in no time.

And then no more wrinkles for moi.

What if they're too smart to take the case?

God! You're not going gaga for the uptight boy?

No. [scoffs]

No.

But they are real detectives, Esther, and they have this, like, criteria...

[buzzes] I made you handsome for a reason, Monty.

- So tempt him. Entice him. - [sighs]

I've already done most of the work, so all you have to do

is leave a trail of breadcrumbs and bring it home.

- Do I need to go to the woods myself? - No.

I'll get it done.

[birds chirping]

- Still nothing? - No.

- Well, at least David's gone, right? - Yeah.

God, I feel totally useless.

Okay. What am I supposed to do now?

Maybe the boys could help.

Help with what?

Uh...

To help me find my keys.

But I just remembered I left them downstairs,

so it's, um...

It's... It's all good.

Well, we actually need your help.

We are in need of your psychic assistance.

Oh, no.

I mean, oh, wow. [chuckles]

Our case board's full up.

Drowning victim needs his boat,

our banker needs his lucky coin.

Simple stuff, leg-work-heavy, but not for you.

[chuckles nervously] Yeah.

Hey.

We all just gonna end up on the roof?

Oh!

Hello, Monty.

If you would like a private discussion about astrology or anything else,

I would be very happy to meet with you in private at a more amenable time.

Privately.

Okay, everybody's a bit off today.

This isn't about astrology, Edwin.

My good friend is in danger. I need your help.

So you're not gonna tell them?

You heard them. They need my powers.

But you don't have powers.

Exactly. And can you imagine Edwin's face if he found out?

So, we're just gonna lie?

We're just not telling

until we get a chance to go back to Tragic Mick's

or somehow figure out how to reverse this, okay?

It's my, uh, ghost friend, Gladys.

We were supposed to meet, but she didn't show.

Which is... It's very unlike her. She's a very considerate person.

Kind. Caring.

You know, like you. Charles.

[chuckles]

Cheers, mate.

See, Edwin? Everyone likes me eventually.

You know, before Gladys disappeared,

she told me that she was going to the Tall Forest to, uh, stargaze.

But she never came back.

And, unlike Edwin, Gladys doesn't have anyone else.

Just me.

She was the first ghost I saw after I woke up from my coma.

Let me know I wasn't insane.

That's gonna require some old-fashioned shoe leather.

That's what you guys call it, right?

Whatever. We would love to help find your friend.

[Monty sighs] Okay.

Oh, I don't usually get a vote, but yes.

Hold up a tick.

Monty's our mate and all, but Gladys could've buggered off.

Looking for a ghost who might not even be missing is low priority right now.

Sorry. Our case board is full.

Edwin, you know what I'm saying?

Gladys was there for Monty at his most vulnerable,

which is a lot like us, Charles.

In this instance we can make an exception.

[sighs] Great. And because it's more up your traditional detective alley,

Niko and I will hit up Tragic Mick's to look around.

We are? I mean, yeah, we are.

Actually, we may need your special skills.

You should come, Crystal.

[Charles] Right.

Tall Forest it is.

I should probably stay for this one.

Jenny shouldn't be alone after what happened to her.

You look really nice.

[gasping]

[sighs]

[man] Ah!

I was sure you were dead.

Dying isn't available to me. [grunts]

What an unusual thing to say.

[Night Nurse grunts]

I am Kashina.

- [Night Nurse grunts] - My friends call me Kashi.

Sorry, huh, about the mess.

Don't get many houseguests and, again, almost certain you were dead.

I must go.

I have important work to finish here on the mortal plane.

Now, time is wasting.

Is there a way out of this beast's stomach?

Huh...

You know, I've never tried to leave.

Tell me how to get out of this place.

It would be a shame for you to die.

Again. Wait, are you dead?

No, sorry.

I'm just a really, really, really old man

who lives in a fish.

[laughing]

Fine. If you won't tell me, I'll just have to look for myself.

This won't be pleasant.

Why can't I see your trauma?

Oh, is that what you're doing?

Ah, okay.

Really, I'm not sure I have any trauma.

Life has been fair.

You were swallowed by a gigantic fish.

Ah, one of many adventures.

You know, you are fascinating.

You're also trapped.

Might as well come have an oyster, huh?

- No! - Oh, no. Okay. Okay.

There must be something I can give you.

How about...

good counsel?

You do seem stressed, huh...

Look, Kashi, let me be clear.

I don't need anything from you.

My only priority is escaping this beast

so that I may collect two wicked dead boys.

Tall Forest has a clearing where Gladys liked to stargaze.

We should start looking there.

I understand you are worried for Gladys,

but ghosts are not at risk of exposure, injury...

Are you saying my ghost friend isn't gonna die?

Super. Thanks.

Perhaps...

Perhaps it is time for us to clear the air?

I didn't mean to hurt your feelings.

It's my fault, Edwin.

Never get involved with Capricorns.

They are cold,

impulsive...

And they hurt people.

Oi.

Take a look.

What's that about, mate?

For protection.

Protection from what, precisely?

Suddenly any ghosts who go into the forest don't come back.

We've all lost someone in there.

There's pure evil in those woods.

This appears to be a far larger case than just Gladys.

So, no one comes out but I assume we're going in?

It's the last place a ghost wants to be right now.

You're just gonna let whatever's in there have Gladys?

You guys have more skills than these regular ghosts that went in there.

That wasn't what I was saying.

[Edwin] You were right.

We are the Dead Boy Detectives, and we will find your friend.

[exhales]

Oh, we're... We're here.

Right. We must carefully survey for any evidence Gladys was here.

Charles, do you have the stones?

Just whisper the name of the spirit you're hunting into the stone.

It's Gladys, yeah?

It should glow if you get close to anywhere she's been.

[whispering] Gladys.

Slash marks.

This could be something.

The stone isn't glowing.

Crystal, can you read the tree?

You want me to read the tree?

[chuckles]

If the stones aren't glowing, then Gladys hasn't been here. Right?

Can you try?

[Crystal clearing throat]

[breathes deeply]

No, it's just a bear.

Your eyes didn't go white.

- Don't they always go white? - Maybe you missed it.

All right, you've been brassed off all day and now you're lying. Come on.

I'm not brassed off. Maybe you are.

There's something weird going on with Monty and Edwin. Why focus on me?

- What is even happening? - [Edwin] Don't change the subject.

Fine. I lost my abilities.

They're gone, okay? Just like that.

No, I didn't read the stupid tree.

- Shit. - What?

Um...

Are you okay?

Yeah. I was trying to get the demon out of my head

and then I went to Mick's, and it... It just happened, okay?

Crystal, why would you withhold this from us?

Sorry, what happened to, uh,

"We do not need a psychic."

"We can do it the good old fashioned detective way"?

Firstly, I do not sound like that.

And secondly,

I am dealing with my own difficulties at the moment.

Please! I'm not gonna tell you that I lost my powers

so you can leave me to sulk at the Tongue & Tail.

Unfair, I've grown to value you.

- How do you know... - You would've.

What about me?

Sorry to interrupt, uh, whatever this is,

but I found something.

[Edwin] Hmm.

This luminescence is spectral.

Could be signs of a type of Omphalotus nidiformis.

That's fancy talk for ghost fungus.

Highly toxic, but only to ghosts.

We should keep our distance, Charles.

It's like the Case of the Ghastly Greenhouse, innit?

You don't wanna get this one in the eyes. Real rough go.

Blindness, pain, drives you mental.

That must be what happened to Gladys and the others.

But how do we find them?

These patches should lead us to a larger fungal body.

The main hub of the fungus.

Excellent eye, Monty.

I'll go and find out what's going on with Crystal and her powers.

The Monty thing's all yours.

[rock music playing]

Jenny, we need to talk.

You really need a hobby, Niko.

So, my dad always said, "Never go to bed angry,"

which I don't understand,

but what I think he meant was, it feels better if you talk it through.

I don't wanna talk.

But we have to talk, so you can yell at me and then forgive me.

Let's do this.

A woman attacked me

in a "rom-com meets slasher flick" kind of way.

She died.

We don't have to yell, we just have to move on.

So you're saying I've been imagining that you're avoiding me?

Oh, no, I've definitely been avoiding you.

Because of all of this.

I knew it.

You're mad at me for pushing you into believing in love

and it blew up in your face.

Ugh! Okay. Time for boundaries.

I am your landlord,

you are my teenage tenant.

So, I don't ask you why you don't go to school,

or why you talk to yourself in your room all day,

or why you don't have any friends, because it's none of my business,

just like whatever the fuck I am doing is none of yours.

[Charles] You sure you don't wanna talk about it?

I bet it feels pretty strange.

Yeah, it feels terrifying.

You know you could have told me.

Edwin too, even though you feel like you couldn't.

- [sighs] - Yeah. I know. I know.

When there was something wrong with me, you beat it out of me.

There's something wrong with you.

You don't know what it's like

having a demon pop in your mind whenever he wants.

It's like his fucking haunting me.

Crystal, not for nothing, but I do know a fair bit about haunting.

Okay, I love that you wanna help, but it's...

[animal bellowing]

[bellowing continues]

What is that?

Sometimes, when animals die, they don't know they are dead.

[bellowing]

They simply roam the woods forever.

It's really beautiful.

And...

And sad.

What the hell just happened?

If my theory is correct,

the ghost was consumed by the spore colony.

It's safe to assume any other ghost met the same fate.

No, so... Sorry. That... That did not happen to Gladys.

Edwin, you're saying this fungus eats ghosts?

That's not a fungus.

Edwin, I can't find the Compendium.

Fungus or whatever, how can ghosts be eaten if they're already dead?

Ghosts possess energy, some things feed on that.

They use it to grow more powerful.

We can't die again, but we can be consumed or absorbed.

There. Middle shelf, grey spine.

[Charles] There it is. The little biter.

Forest Elemental.

Doesn't look so bad.

Nasty bugger.

Any ghost he eats is completely obliterated.

No afterlife, no reincarnation.

Just empty, dark nothing.

That... That's what it does?

Not to worry.

This Forest Elemental is small and easily killed

with the proper weapon.

[bell dings]

This will make quick work of it.

[Charles grunts]

Well, that's that.

Job officially jobbed.

[Elemental whooshes]

Perhaps this Elemental is larger than we first thought.

[Elemental groaning]

What happened to "small and easily killed"?

I'm puzzled. An Elemental feeds and grows, but never at this scale or speed.

Wait, look at this.

"Interdimensional Creatures and Oddities."

[Charles] It's the same thing, it's just bigger.

Consumes any spiritual energy.

Supposed to live underground in another dimension.

Why is it here?

How did it get here?

- Maybe someone brought it here. - Why would anyone even do that?

Whatever the case, its growth seems exponential.

By morning it'll reach Port Townsend, then...

All-you-can-eat ghost buffet.

[Elemental growling]

We've not got enough purple stuff to get rid of it.

If we can find its point of origin, we can fell it.

We simply need to track it.

And avoid being consumed.

Maybe we should split up?

Right? I mean, that's, like, the only way we'll be able to cover ground fast enough.

Said every dead teen in a horror movie ever.

The Elemental poses little threat to humans. As such,

we should pair ourselves up accordingly.

One living and one dead per duo.

Monty, with me.

Do be careful, Charles.

You be careful.

[Night Nurse whimpers]

This is nonsensical! [grunts]

A starved brain is often cloudy.

You should enjoy some food.

Ugh! I'll enjoy getting out of here

- and getting back to my work! - [Angie growling]

Oh, yes.

You mentioned earlier your job involves collecting dead boys?

Dead children. I make sure they're in their proper place.

[sighs]

But these two boys, well...

They can't run forever.

Have you considered maybe they're happy where they are?

The afterlife is far superior to anything we have available here.

Huh... So you've seen it?

No, it's unique to each soul.

So you can't know it's better.

That's irrelevant!

- The point is, everything has a place! - [Angie growling]

Ah, hubris.

To assume everything goes in a specific place.

I do not make the laws of the universe.

I simply ensure they are followed.

And if you start talking to me about free will,

I will drown you or myself.

Honestly, I don't enjoy violence,

but I'm not above it!

Clearly.

Stabbing the only thing keeping us safe and sound at the bottom of the ocean.

In theory I will live for eons.

I can't spend eons inside a fish

when there's work to be done!

[breathing heavily]

[breathing deeply]

Where did you get these different colored rings from?

I told you, I've had adventures,

lived many lives.

Some good, some bad.

But I know, you're certain you don't need anything from me.

Right, well,

I suppose it couldn't hurt to listen.

Nothing else seems to be working.

Imagine...

thinking there was only one way to do any one thing.

How difficult would life be?

Instead of stabbing, let us try talking to her.

Why are you being so kind to me, and also,

are you insane?

Hi, hello!

Sorry to bother you, but could you possibly let my friend out?

Once you do, go back to sleep, huh?

[Angie growling]

[laughing]

I suspect we are going to the surface.

Here.

Take this.

To remember our adventure.

Small as it was.

Hold up. See that?

Time for the old poke and prod.

Uh, maybe I should do that.

Seeing as you could be super-extra-killed by this thing.

Oh.

[David] Tricky move, locking me out of your head!

Did you really think that that would keep you safe from me?

David.

This must be David the Demon.

Seems like a bit of a coward.

Right, show your face.

I already beat you once, didn't I?

[David] Oh, no, I'm so fucking scared.

[screams]

[laughs maniacally]

Let's go.

[David] You look beautiful, Crystal, I gotta tell ya.

It's a good look for you.

Look at your little boyfriend, trying to be a hero.

Do you really think that you deserve a hero, Crystal?

Don't listen to him. It's just some sort of mindfuck.

[David] Why the fuck do you smell so weak?

What the fuck did you do?

I gave up my powers.

Okay? I got you out of my fucking head.

[David] There is no way...

You can't get in anymore, asshole.

Crystal, we need to go, now.

- He's everywhere. - [David] I'd love to see you try.

- I can't. - Yeah, Charles, she can't.

'Cause she just gave up the most special thing about her.

Now she's just another fucking terrified lump of human flesh.

- You're right, okay? - [David laughing]

I am no one now. I am nothing special.

So why don't you just leave me the fuck alone?!

[David] Maybe I will.

You're useless now.

But this, this is also a lot of fun.

Did you really think that you could beat me with a fucking cricket bat?

- A magic cricket bat? - [David laughs]

Yeah.

- [Charles grunts] - [David screaming]

[screaming stops]

[Crystal exhales]

Thank you. [sniffles]

[crying]

I will always hit a demon with a cricket bat for you.

I wish you didn't have to see that.

He's wrong, you know.

You're still pretty damn special.

Okay, enough, uh, emotional bullshit.

[sniffling] We're, uh, on a case, right?

We still have some ghost-eating moss to find from another dimension, so...

Signs of the Elemental appear to converge one kilometer due east.

The likely origin. Do you concur?

If we are to solve this case, we need to communicate.

- You are harboring upset feelings, but... - Yes, I am, Edwin.

Because I like you a lot and you don't.

I kissed you, and you don't even care.

I do care.

I apologize.

You were my first kiss.

That matters greatly.

I was?

You were mine too.

Look, things are a touch complicated for me at the moment,

but I promise you that I care.

Monty, you're my friend.

[splutters] You know what?

I just remembered that, um, Gladys also like sailing.

So she might not even be in the forest.

Maybe we should leave and start looking there.

[Edwin] Odd to recall that now.

- We can't leave till the case is closed. - I really think we should leave. Now.

Hello.

Someone's been a very naughty, naughty ghost.

- I'm in the middle of a case. - Ugh, tell me about it.

I've been on the hunt for you all night in this ridiculous forest.

I hate trees.

Just, generally, I hate them.

Who is... Who is this?

I'll tell you who this is. This...

is a very close friend of Edwin's.

[chuckles]

Secret friend.

You didn't think you were the only one keeping secrets, did you, Monty?

What are you running on about?

[Cat King] Oh, God.

The handsome face, the little...

kiss,

bullshit astrology.

He's luring you into a trap!

[inhales sharply]

Sorry. I always say the quiet parts out loud.

[whispering] He's luring you into a trap.

[Monty scoffs]

Like Edwin would believe that.

So you're not the witch's pet bird?

No?

She didn't turn you into a boy?

Sorry to break it to you, Edwin, but your first kiss was with a crow.

I saw that.

Very awkward.

[Edwin] Monty?

Edwin, I can explain.

Also, there's no Gladys.

[whispering] Sorry.

What do you mean there's no Gladys?

Were you just pretending to be my friend?

- To get me to feel some sort of... - At first, yes.

Then no.

What does it matter? You admitted that you don't love me.

Those jumbled feelings that you have... [sighs]

...are for Charles.

He's the one you love, and it's so obvious.

What?

What are you...

Even if that were true, you're a bloody crow!

[Monty breathing heavily]

Nicely done.

You know, you do need to be more careful about who you trust.

[sighs] I'm such an idiot.

Yeah.

I need to warn Crystal and Charles.

Hold on. Hold on.

[chuckles] I came all the way out into this ridiculous forest to save you.

I believe I'm at least owed a thank-you.

By the way, the second kiss is always much better.

Please hear me.

I am not your toy to yank around.

I owe you nothing.

Edwin, I am not someone to be dismissed.

This is all you are. Do you understand?

If you walk away from me,

it'll never come off and you'll be trapped here forever

and I will stop playing nice.

Do you hear me? I will stop fucking playing nice!

[Monty panting]

[Esther] Oh.

Is someone having a bad day? [chuckles]

You didn't tell me that mushroom thing was gonna completely eradicate them.

Or how gruesome it would be. Or how to...

Wait, wait, wait. Where are the ghost boys and the little psychic shrew?

They know, Esther.

That stupid Cat King came and he told Edwin everything.

So he knows I'm your crow,

and he knows this is a trap.

So, you let them escape?

I knew you were getting too attached.

I never asked to be human,

with all these... [sighs]

feelings.

I'm sorry, did you wanna stay a dirty, disgusting little crow?

I have to finish everything myself.

I mean, this is why we had a plan, Monty,

so I wouldn't be the one traipsing through the goddamn woods!

[gasps]

- [thuds] - [knife clatters]

[Monty shrieking]

[shrieking stops]

I think I see something.

Charles! Crystal!

Monty is a crow! He's Esther's crow! This is a trap!

[all grunt]

- [Elemental growling] - [all grunting]

[Elemental roaring]

[all panting]

Oh!

Honestly, you wouldn't believe all the things have gone wrong today.

I could use a drink.

But now that we're here,

if you could just go ahead and get consumed forever...

I know it's a shame the surprise was ruined.

Because Monty was supposed to be helpful, but he got too emotional.

Where are my manners?

Boys, this is Teeth Face.

- [Teeth Face growling] - [Esther laughs]

Teeth Face, this is ugh and ugh. [chuckles]

Isn't he cute?

Uh-uh.

- [Teeth Face growling] - [both grunting]

No digging around in my mind, child.

I'll deal with you after dinner. [chuckles]

Do you like my toothy devil?

[Teeth Face growling]

[muffled screaming]

[Teeth Face growling]

God, I love final moments.

[Washer Woman] When the ground moves...

[bird squawks]

- ...and the bird cries... - [bird squawks]

...stop looking without,

and look within. [echoing]

[Crystal gasps]

[woman] Are you hungry?

Quite a production.

I'm Iris, one of your ancestors.

We're all ancestors, all family here.

Uh...

What is this place?

It's a special kind of place.

Most of the women in our family make their way here.

Technically, we're in your head.

Very technically, this, sweet child, is you.

You're beautiful.

So I'm a tree?

And there's a table and sandwich.

Clearly means something, I...

I lost my powers using a glass heart to stop a demon from possessing me,

but it broke, now I'm powerless,

and a giant mushroom is gonna eat my ghost friends...

Well, that is a specific kind of problem.

To be honest, that is a new one.

Are you all

like me?

Psychic?

Sure. But you're more than psychic.

The women in our family are rare.

Unique, because we can tap into a shared strength.

Can I get my powers back?

I need to help my friends.

The past is fixed and sturdy.

Like... Like a tree.

If you practice, you could find your true power there.

Between you and me, it's a lot of power.

[women laughing]

[Crystal] I don't know my past.

The demon took my memories.

No, honey.

Your collective past.

All the women in our family share it.

All the healers and... And priestess and shaman and artists.

So, you're...

This

is all in my mind?

Again, very technically.

Try not to think about it too hard.

And you know I was willing to give everything up to get rid of David. Now...

- Now I'm nothing. - None of that.

That is what things like demons have tried to do to us for all time.

They want you to feel weak, defeated.

But you are not weak.

And you are not alone.

This is a safe place.

A strong place for you to bring your troubles.

Nothing can take us away.

No curse, no spell, no desperate mistake.

Because it's all still in me.

[gasping]

[both grunting]

[Esther grunting]

[Esther groaning]

[Teeth Face growling]

[muffled screaming]

[Esther roars]

Get up.

[spits]

[Crystal gasps]

[Crystal groans]

[Teeth Face roaring]

[Iris] The women in our family are rare.

Unique, because we can tap into a shared strength.

[Crystal yells]

[Crystal] Please hear me, Forest Elemental.

The witch does not control you.

You are free to leave this realm.

[both gasping]

Teeth Face, what the fuck?

Oh, wow.

Sorry. Okay, bye.

- [Esther grunting] - [Teeth Face roaring]

[Esther screaming]

Oh, my God, are you guys okay?

Yeah. Yeah, we're aces.

[panting] And the witch is dead?

Given her immortality, it is unlikely.

At least she is trapped in another elemental realm.

Crystal, how did you do that?

I didn't know that I could.

I mean, I... I had a lot of help.

Like, every woman in my family ever helped.

That's where my powers come from.

They're all in here.

Right, that's...

That's great.

Can you explain that again to us later?

Just maybe, like, a lot slower next time.

[Crystal chuckling]

[knock on door]

Can I come in?

[door closes]

Niko, I wanted to apologize.

I guess, for snapping at you and causing the emotions...

in your eyes.

I deserved it.

The truth is, I...

I'm sad.

I'm sad that I put myself out there,

and this really messed-up thing happened.

So, you hate me.

No, I don't hate you.

But even though there's no way you could've known about Maxine,

I also don't forgive you.

Just not yet, anyway.

I knew it.

I tried to help.

But I should just stay in my room forever so I can't mess anything else up.

What?

No. No. Stop that bullshit right now.

Do not change yourself into some pity-party shut-in

because of a dead psychopath.

That sounds like a good reason.

It's not.

There's already one emotionally shut-down nihilist in this building.

The last thing we need is two.

So if you love love,

wanna help people, then do it.

Just don't try to help me.

[door opens and closes]

"The Esther Bester" gets my vote.

Oh.

What about "Crystal Shroom Persuasion"?

I like that one.

[Edwin] Hmm. Something more direct.

How about "the Crystal Method"?

I'm honored to finally have a move named after me. Thank you.

Well, I'm chuffed you got your powers back, even if...

I don't understand it.

Fair. It, uh...

It's gonna take me some time to understand it myself.

Well, I must apologize for not quite being myself today.

I'm sorry.

Wow, Edwin.

An apology.

Do not get used to it.

[Charles chuckles]

[Crystal] Mmm.

I should go and tell Niko that I'm back to normal,

kind of,

so she's not stressing.

I'll be back.

[door closes]

Charles?

Yeah, mate.

I, um...

find myself...

It's very unusual for me to...

Apologize? I know.

I'm still gobsmacked at that one.

No, not that.

Listen...

Monty unearthed some...

feelings within me.

Oi.

You could've told me you liked him.

So this is why you dressed up nice today.

Don't matter one bit to me.

This is why you've been acting so cagey about the Cat King.

He trying to get frisky with you?

I'll knock his whiskers off his little face.

[Edwin chuckles]

Thank you.

It's...

not as simple as that.

I've been realizing that I...

You've been realizing I was right.

And let's all go to the afterlife so thoughtfully appointed to us.

You're supposed to be at the bottom of the ocean.

For all intents and purposes, I'm an eternal, trans-dimensional being.

You can't kill me by kicking me into a sea monster.

We can talk this out.

You cannot split us up.

That's quite enough chatter.

It was me who kicked you, yeah?

Send me wherever, but Edwin doesn't belong in Hell.

He was only there on a technicality because of a muck-up.

The afterlife is incapable of a muck-up.

It's in that little book of yours.

That's odd.

It's not supposed to...

A technicality, you say?

With Hell?

Is this why Hell is looking for you?

I was sacrificed by classmates who didn't know what they were doing.

The demon who took me away even apologized for the technicality.

Over two million hours in this post,

miles of paperwork,

never once have I seen an error like this.

Shouldn't be possible.

Well...

In the grand scheme of things, I'm more of a minor functionary.

However, these do seem like especially odd circumstances.

So whilst I suss out the cause of this aberration,

you two may stay together.

[both sigh]

In the Lost & Found Department.

Temporarily.

- [high-pitched laughter] - [thudding]

- No, please. No. - [monster growling]

No, it's coming from Hell! It's coming from...

- [monster roars] - [Charles screams]

Charles!

- [gasping] - Edwin!

[grunting]

["Shakedown" playing]

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