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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,123 --> 00:00:05,896 - Synced and corrected by MasterCookie - - www.addic7ed.com - 2 00:00:06,664 --> 00:00:09,698 Brett: Yeah, I had a really good time too, Natalie. 3 00:00:09,733 --> 00:00:12,168 Yeah, um... 4 00:00:12,203 --> 00:00:14,370 You... 5 00:00:14,405 --> 00:00:16,539 You do want to see me again? 6 00:00:16,574 --> 00:00:17,406 I... 7 00:00:17,441 --> 00:00:20,409 Well, how bad do you want it, Natalie? 8 00:00:20,444 --> 00:00:23,645 'Cause... if you want it, you're just gonna 9 00:00:23,680 --> 00:00:25,213 - have to come and get it, baby. - (door opens) 10 00:00:25,248 --> 00:00:26,681 - (Alex scatting) - Oh! 11 00:00:26,716 --> 00:00:27,782 Oh! 12 00:00:27,817 --> 00:00:30,117 Lookin' good, dawg! 13 00:00:30,153 --> 00:00:32,387 (laughs) 14 00:00:33,935 --> 00:00:34,934 You okay? 15 00:00:34,969 --> 00:00:38,471 Something happened. 16 00:00:38,507 --> 00:00:41,206 Look, and to be clear, it was a total accident. 17 00:00:41,242 --> 00:00:43,375 She was like, "Come into my bedroom." 18 00:00:43,410 --> 00:00:45,910 And I was like, "Well, of course I'm not gonna go into your bedroom." 19 00:00:45,946 --> 00:00:47,779 And so, as I was walking down the hall, 20 00:00:47,814 --> 00:00:48,880 I kept saying that. 21 00:00:48,915 --> 00:00:50,015 But I went in, 22 00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:51,850 and I woke up 23 00:00:51,885 --> 00:00:54,786 feeling incredibly guilty, and... and that was there. 24 00:00:54,821 --> 00:00:58,256 And then, I was like... 25 00:00:58,291 --> 00:01:00,625 Hold on a second. 26 00:01:00,660 --> 00:01:05,563 You... had an incredible evening with this girl... 27 00:01:05,598 --> 00:01:07,365 Who is amazing, by the way... 28 00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:09,133 and you guys were 29 00:01:09,169 --> 00:01:12,436 just light and fun, and it was natural, 30 00:01:12,472 --> 00:01:14,837 and you were joking, and kissing, and making out. 31 00:01:14,873 --> 00:01:18,007 And... and the... And the new body parts 32 00:01:18,043 --> 00:01:20,177 were all over the place, and we were exploring, 33 00:01:20,212 --> 00:01:23,713 and I was, like, 14, and it was just... 34 00:01:23,748 --> 00:01:26,049 so incredible, 35 00:01:26,084 --> 00:01:27,016 and I had so much fun, 36 00:01:27,052 --> 00:01:28,918 and I would never tell this to anybody else 37 00:01:28,953 --> 00:01:31,453 'cause... but, like... 38 00:01:31,489 --> 00:01:33,489 it's kind of fucking me up. 39 00:01:33,524 --> 00:01:35,757 At some point, do you think you guys are gonna talk 40 00:01:35,793 --> 00:01:38,227 so I can stop being the translator? 41 00:01:38,262 --> 00:01:42,130 I've been trying so hard to talk to him, 42 00:01:42,166 --> 00:01:44,032 but you know. 43 00:01:44,068 --> 00:01:47,802 He's... he's just still so angry. 44 00:01:47,837 --> 00:01:50,137 Yeah. 45 00:01:50,173 --> 00:01:51,206 Of course he is. 46 00:01:51,241 --> 00:01:53,508 'Cause look... look at his life right now. 47 00:01:53,543 --> 00:01:56,010 He only has the kids half the time, he's, like, 48 00:01:56,045 --> 00:02:01,282 dorming with his best friend, doing his "Dune" puppet show, 49 00:02:01,318 --> 00:02:02,750 whatever that fucking thing is. 50 00:02:02,785 --> 00:02:04,151 He's, like, in heaven. 51 00:02:04,187 --> 00:02:06,420 It's the hall pass to end all hall passes. 52 00:02:09,358 --> 00:02:11,358 I'd stay angry too if I were him. 53 00:02:15,797 --> 00:02:17,831 This is fucking bullshit! 54 00:02:17,866 --> 00:02:19,966 - Okay? - What? What is? 55 00:02:20,001 --> 00:02:20,967 Do you know what it's called 56 00:02:21,002 --> 00:02:22,568 when you get pregnant after 35? 57 00:02:22,604 --> 00:02:24,737 A geriatric pregnancy. 58 00:02:24,772 --> 00:02:26,372 And I'm not kidding. 59 00:02:27,675 --> 00:02:31,110 So, I have a geriatric vagina? 60 00:02:31,145 --> 00:02:32,678 Geri-ina? 61 00:02:32,714 --> 00:02:34,179 (laughs) 62 00:02:34,215 --> 00:02:36,616 Apparently, I don't have any eggs left! 63 00:02:36,651 --> 00:02:38,416 - You don't know... - The ones I have left 64 00:02:38,452 --> 00:02:40,952 - are all like... (groans) - Well, you- 65 00:02:40,987 --> 00:02:42,487 (in decrepit voice) Sonny boy, 66 00:02:42,522 --> 00:02:44,756 - come over here! - Okay. 67 00:02:44,791 --> 00:02:47,392 Don't do that outside of this sofa. 68 00:02:48,562 --> 00:02:52,029 I know that I don't have the best history in terms of, 69 00:02:52,065 --> 00:02:53,831 you know, my taste in men, 70 00:02:53,867 --> 00:02:56,066 but I am finally ready. 71 00:02:56,101 --> 00:02:59,803 I'm ready to find someone who's kind 72 00:02:59,838 --> 00:03:01,405 and who just wants to have kids 73 00:03:01,440 --> 00:03:04,308 - and have a nice life. - I know, I know. 74 00:03:05,444 --> 00:03:06,677 - Like him. - Oh! 75 00:03:06,712 --> 00:03:08,945 (both laugh) 76 00:03:08,981 --> 00:03:11,014 Ha! 77 00:03:11,049 --> 00:03:12,782 It's enough to make me jump off a bridge. 78 00:03:12,817 --> 00:03:13,883 But you do know that 79 00:03:13,918 --> 00:03:15,951 this is not the place you should be looking. 80 00:03:15,987 --> 00:03:17,287 What's the alternative? 81 00:03:17,322 --> 00:03:18,788 - I... - (phone rings) 82 00:03:18,823 --> 00:03:20,723 What do you suggest? 83 00:03:21,893 --> 00:03:23,526 Hey, Tracy. 84 00:03:23,561 --> 00:03:25,762 I mean, really? This is the picture he chose? 85 00:03:25,797 --> 00:03:27,180 - This is the picture - Today? Right now? 86 00:03:27,378 --> 00:03:31,433 - you chose to send in? Nope. - I'll be there in a minute, yeah. 87 00:03:31,468 --> 00:03:33,234 - (sighs) - What happened? 88 00:03:33,270 --> 00:03:36,070 - Ugh. It's so weird. - What? 89 00:03:36,106 --> 00:03:37,339 No, there's just 90 00:03:37,374 --> 00:03:39,708 a charter school meeting at Bon Vivant. 91 00:03:39,743 --> 00:03:40,975 Did you forget? 92 00:03:41,011 --> 00:03:43,945 No, I... I didn't set it up. 93 00:03:50,520 --> 00:03:52,186 Anna: Guys, this was so great. 94 00:03:52,221 --> 00:03:53,821 Thank you all so much. 95 00:03:53,856 --> 00:03:55,289 We are really getting shit done. 96 00:03:55,325 --> 00:03:56,624 I am so excited. 97 00:03:56,659 --> 00:03:58,559 Michelle! Hi! 98 00:04:00,797 --> 00:04:02,029 How are you, sweetheart? 99 00:04:02,064 --> 00:04:03,763 Hey, Anna. Um... 100 00:04:03,799 --> 00:04:05,432 Where have you been? 101 00:04:05,467 --> 00:04:06,966 - What? - Oh, I mean, 102 00:04:07,001 --> 00:04:08,601 the meeting started at 8:00. 103 00:04:08,637 --> 00:04:10,503 What meeting is this? 104 00:04:10,539 --> 00:04:13,373 The meeting about the big fundraiser and... 105 00:04:13,408 --> 00:04:15,174 I e-mailed you about it on Tuesday. 106 00:04:15,210 --> 00:04:17,009 No, I didn't get an e-mail. 107 00:04:17,045 --> 00:04:18,110 What? 108 00:04:26,587 --> 00:04:27,720 Excuse me. 109 00:04:29,323 --> 00:04:31,690 Oh. 110 00:04:31,726 --> 00:04:32,991 You're, like, 12. 111 00:04:33,026 --> 00:04:35,461 Anna: I'm sure it went to your Spam with all the recipients. 112 00:04:35,496 --> 00:04:38,195 But you really didn't miss anything. You know, we just... 113 00:04:38,231 --> 00:04:39,530 We talked about the fundraiser, 114 00:04:39,566 --> 00:04:41,232 which I'm gonna host at my house. 115 00:04:41,267 --> 00:04:43,100 I'm sure I'm leaving stuff out, but you know what? 116 00:04:43,135 --> 00:04:44,235 I can fill you in later. 117 00:04:44,270 --> 00:04:47,538 - I am off to Pilates, okay? - Oh. 118 00:04:47,574 --> 00:04:49,407 - Uh... Mm! - Oh, my gosh! 119 00:04:49,442 --> 00:04:50,975 Do you just bathe in coconut oil? 120 00:04:51,010 --> 00:04:52,109 You're like velvet. 121 00:04:52,144 --> 00:04:53,678 Call you. 122 00:04:59,251 --> 00:05:01,451 That's your new friend? 123 00:05:01,487 --> 00:05:03,052 Yeah. 124 00:05:03,088 --> 00:05:05,088 I sure don't like her. 125 00:05:08,126 --> 00:05:10,193 - Why are you being so cagey? - I'm not being cagey. 126 00:05:10,228 --> 00:05:12,127 Well, you're, like, not telling me where we're going. 127 00:05:12,162 --> 00:05:13,529 You're not answering any of my questions. 128 00:05:13,564 --> 00:05:14,497 I just feel... And you're grabbing onto 129 00:05:14,532 --> 00:05:16,198 - my arm. I don't know what you're... - Okay. 130 00:05:16,233 --> 00:05:18,267 You know how I said we needed some help with "Dune"? 131 00:05:18,302 --> 00:05:19,769 Yes, I know we discussed this. 132 00:05:19,804 --> 00:05:21,303 Well, I... I think we found our guy. 133 00:05:21,338 --> 00:05:23,672 Well, I think I still wanna try to do this 134 00:05:23,708 --> 00:05:25,274 on our own, so it's a discussion. 135 00:05:25,309 --> 00:05:28,943 I... I know, but we're overwhelmed and we need help 136 00:05:28,978 --> 00:05:30,412 if we're ever gonna get this show on its feet. 137 00:05:30,447 --> 00:05:31,545 - Why are you talking to me like a - Look... 138 00:05:31,670 --> 00:05:33,392 - four-year-old right now ? - It's just... 139 00:05:33,417 --> 00:05:35,417 Will you promise me you'll have an open mind? 140 00:05:35,452 --> 00:05:38,520 - Yes, Daddy. I'll have an open mind. - Because people can change. 141 00:05:38,555 --> 00:05:40,354 You know that, right? 142 00:05:40,390 --> 00:05:42,490 Alex, yes. I know... 143 00:05:42,526 --> 00:05:43,858 What? 144 00:05:45,061 --> 00:05:46,794 Oh, fuck. Are you... 145 00:05:46,829 --> 00:05:47,728 No. 146 00:05:47,763 --> 00:05:49,062 People do not change that much. 147 00:05:49,097 --> 00:05:50,531 That is not possible. 148 00:05:50,566 --> 00:05:51,732 Brett, he's in AA now. 149 00:05:51,767 --> 00:05:53,801 He was an alcoholic then. 150 00:05:53,836 --> 00:05:54,635 So what? 151 00:05:54,670 --> 00:05:56,236 We're, like, his amends or something? 152 00:05:56,271 --> 00:05:57,504 I don't want to be a project for... 153 00:05:57,540 --> 00:05:58,839 Well, he knows he treated you like shit, 154 00:05:58,874 --> 00:06:00,407 so technically, you are a part of his amends, 155 00:06:00,443 --> 00:06:02,475 but he just happens to be a huge "Dune" fan, 156 00:06:02,510 --> 00:06:03,810 and he's great with visuals, man. 157 00:06:03,845 --> 00:06:05,311 So, this is win-win. 158 00:06:11,018 --> 00:06:13,653 159 00:06:23,330 --> 00:06:26,898 She said I left her, baby 160 00:06:26,934 --> 00:06:29,267 Tell her that I love her 161 00:06:30,604 --> 00:06:33,538 It's a million in one 162 00:06:33,574 --> 00:06:38,442 On this squeeze of so much 163 00:06:40,947 --> 00:06:43,948 Said I am crying 164 00:06:45,184 --> 00:06:48,118 I am weeping 165 00:06:48,153 --> 00:06:51,555 'Cause my baby has gone 166 00:06:52,792 --> 00:06:55,124 My baby is gone 167 00:06:57,796 --> 00:07:00,429 Okay, I... I look a little bit different 168 00:07:00,465 --> 00:07:01,430 than my profile pic. 169 00:07:01,466 --> 00:07:03,633 - Yeah. - Yeah. (chuckles) 170 00:07:03,668 --> 00:07:05,835 - Or a lot different. - Uh, yeah. 171 00:07:05,871 --> 00:07:08,638 Okay, I get it. Um, believe it or not, 172 00:07:08,673 --> 00:07:11,106 some people in our society are 173 00:07:11,141 --> 00:07:12,841 really focused on looks. 174 00:07:12,877 --> 00:07:15,210 So, you know, I chose 175 00:07:15,245 --> 00:07:17,779 an image that wasn't so, you know, specific. 176 00:07:17,815 --> 00:07:20,148 But it's... I'm... 177 00:07:20,183 --> 00:07:21,750 Is it actually you? 178 00:07:21,785 --> 00:07:23,218 Yes, it's me. 179 00:07:23,253 --> 00:07:24,853 It's just some people, if they knew 180 00:07:24,889 --> 00:07:26,955 exactly what I looked like, they wouldn't even show up, 181 00:07:26,991 --> 00:07:29,023 so adjustments... 182 00:07:29,058 --> 00:07:30,958 need to be made. 183 00:07:30,994 --> 00:07:32,527 You basically lie? 184 00:07:32,562 --> 00:07:36,731 It's not lie. It's... Photoshop. 185 00:07:38,768 --> 00:07:40,902 I mean, okay. 186 00:07:40,937 --> 00:07:42,737 So you like to travel? 187 00:07:42,772 --> 00:07:44,138 I... 188 00:07:44,173 --> 00:07:46,540 You're assuming that... 189 00:07:46,575 --> 00:07:49,543 I wanna date somebody who starts off 190 00:07:49,578 --> 00:07:51,177 the relationship with a lie. 191 00:07:51,212 --> 00:07:52,612 Where was your picture taken? 192 00:07:52,648 --> 00:07:54,080 What? 193 00:07:54,115 --> 00:07:56,482 Your profile pic. Where was that one taken? 194 00:07:56,518 --> 00:07:58,051 - I was at a Coldplay concert. - Yeah? 195 00:07:58,086 --> 00:07:59,553 - Yeah. - Yeah? Which tour? 196 00:07:59,588 --> 00:08:03,088 - Um, I think it was Parachutes. - Parachutes. 197 00:08:03,123 --> 00:08:04,056 2001. 198 00:08:04,091 --> 00:08:05,991 - Mm-hmm. - Mmhmm. 199 00:08:06,027 --> 00:08:07,259 What's it now? 200 00:08:08,529 --> 00:08:10,128 Okay. No, no. 201 00:08:10,164 --> 00:08:11,430 I look like my picture. 202 00:08:11,465 --> 00:08:13,265 - I chose a picture... - Yeah... 203 00:08:13,300 --> 00:08:14,077 - That actually resembles - But- 204 00:08:14,210 --> 00:08:15,277 what I look like. 205 00:08:15,570 --> 00:08:16,841 - Resembles is the... is the - Yeah, there's... 206 00:08:16,967 --> 00:08:18,434 perfect word for that. 207 00:08:21,641 --> 00:08:22,607 I'm sorry. 208 00:08:22,642 --> 00:08:25,309 - I just... Clearly this is... - Okay. All right. 209 00:08:25,344 --> 00:08:27,979 Look, I guess we're done here. 210 00:08:28,014 --> 00:08:29,547 Thanks for meeting me. 211 00:08:29,583 --> 00:08:30,682 Yeah. 212 00:08:30,717 --> 00:08:32,984 But look, just let me 213 00:08:33,019 --> 00:08:34,452 give you a piece of advice. 214 00:08:34,487 --> 00:08:35,719 You're obviously new to this. 215 00:08:35,754 --> 00:08:39,823 It is fucking brutal out here. 216 00:08:39,858 --> 00:08:42,258 I mean, everyone's miserable. 217 00:08:42,294 --> 00:08:44,360 Everyone is terrified 218 00:08:44,396 --> 00:08:46,496 and everyone's a little bit Photoshopped, 219 00:08:46,531 --> 00:08:48,966 and if you bring the kind of judgment into this 220 00:08:49,001 --> 00:08:50,834 that you've been throwing my way tonight, 221 00:08:50,869 --> 00:08:54,070 man, you're entering a world of pain. 222 00:08:54,105 --> 00:08:56,572 Who the fuck do you think you are 223 00:08:56,608 --> 00:08:58,407 - talking to me like that? - (sighs) 224 00:08:58,442 --> 00:09:00,509 Let me break it down for you. 225 00:09:00,544 --> 00:09:02,544 You're a nerd, okay? 226 00:09:02,580 --> 00:09:04,080 That's the bottom line. 227 00:09:04,115 --> 00:09:07,016 And frankly, you are not good-looking enough 228 00:09:07,051 --> 00:09:08,684 to be this much of a dick. 229 00:09:08,720 --> 00:09:10,418 And you are not hot enough 230 00:09:10,453 --> 00:09:12,087 anymore... 231 00:09:12,122 --> 00:09:15,323 to be this much of a bitch. 232 00:09:17,728 --> 00:09:20,595 Alex: Ah, I see. 233 00:09:20,631 --> 00:09:21,863 - (buzzing) - (whirring) 234 00:09:21,898 --> 00:09:24,966 I see this moon that holds the answers. 235 00:09:25,002 --> 00:09:26,834 But what? 236 00:09:26,869 --> 00:09:30,437 In my dreams, they call me 237 00:09:30,472 --> 00:09:34,108 by a new name, but I do not know why. 238 00:09:34,143 --> 00:09:38,112 Listen... inside. 239 00:09:39,548 --> 00:09:41,615 The spice is everywhere. 240 00:09:41,651 --> 00:09:42,983 - (buzzing) - (whirring) 241 00:09:43,019 --> 00:09:44,684 Oh, okay. Okay. 242 00:09:45,787 --> 00:09:47,386 Just out of curiosity, 243 00:09:47,421 --> 00:09:50,422 how much of this monologue are you guys planning 244 00:09:50,458 --> 00:09:52,558 to include in the... In the final piece? 245 00:09:52,593 --> 00:09:55,628 Um... uh, all of it. 246 00:09:55,664 --> 00:09:57,363 Yeah, I mean, there's an act break right after it, 247 00:09:57,398 --> 00:09:59,331 - so I feel like it's... - How many acts? 248 00:09:59,367 --> 00:10:00,599 Both: Five. 249 00:10:03,303 --> 00:10:04,402 Okay. 250 00:10:05,572 --> 00:10:08,173 I-yi-yi-yi-yi 251 00:10:08,208 --> 00:10:10,742 yi-yi-yi-yi-yi-yi... 252 00:10:14,982 --> 00:10:17,282 It's gonna be too long. 253 00:10:17,317 --> 00:10:19,583 Oh. Well, part of the point 254 00:10:19,618 --> 00:10:20,584 of this is to play it out real time. 255 00:10:20,619 --> 00:10:23,754 We're like a tone poem as opposed to sort of caving 256 00:10:23,790 --> 00:10:25,022 to the frenetic MTV pacing... 257 00:10:25,058 --> 00:10:27,792 - Brad. Brad... - And it needs focus! 258 00:10:29,361 --> 00:10:30,795 But I love it. 259 00:10:33,733 --> 00:10:35,131 You do? 260 00:10:36,321 --> 00:10:38,188 It's fucking great. 261 00:10:38,223 --> 00:10:40,023 - Yeah? - Yes! 262 00:10:40,059 --> 00:10:43,894 It is so DIY and unique. 263 00:10:43,929 --> 00:10:45,862 Cool. Yeah. Ha! 264 00:10:45,898 --> 00:10:47,931 Uh... sand. 265 00:10:47,967 --> 00:10:48,799 Sand? 266 00:10:48,834 --> 00:10:51,434 We're gonna need a whole bunch of sand. 267 00:10:51,470 --> 00:10:52,301 I don't love sand. 268 00:10:52,336 --> 00:10:54,336 Dudley: We're gonna get a huge space, 269 00:10:54,371 --> 00:10:56,105 and we're gonna fill the fucker with sand! 270 00:10:56,140 --> 00:10:57,940 And then, the sandworms 271 00:10:57,976 --> 00:10:59,709 will come out and they will sail 272 00:10:59,744 --> 00:11:01,077 through the space! 273 00:11:01,112 --> 00:11:04,780 Alex, what if we truncated the monologue? Okay? 274 00:11:04,816 --> 00:11:07,549 And just when you're about to start, 275 00:11:07,585 --> 00:11:08,650 it all of a sudden comes to a stop 276 00:11:08,685 --> 00:11:11,086 because there's a sandworm that comes in and attacks. 277 00:11:11,121 --> 00:11:12,087 All right? 278 00:11:12,122 --> 00:11:14,089 And then out of the blue, 279 00:11:14,124 --> 00:11:16,825 there's a huge fucking lighting shift! 280 00:11:16,860 --> 00:11:18,326 (lights click off) 281 00:11:18,361 --> 00:11:20,829 Uh... what... I mean, how are we gonna see? 282 00:11:20,864 --> 00:11:22,697 Dudley: Plug those in right there. Plug those in. 283 00:11:22,733 --> 00:11:23,865 - Dude... - Alex: These ones? 284 00:11:23,900 --> 00:11:25,533 Yeah. Yeah, yeah. 285 00:11:25,568 --> 00:11:27,467 Yeah! 286 00:11:27,503 --> 00:11:28,869 Brett: That's for... that's for later 287 00:11:28,904 --> 00:11:30,570 when... in, like, the third act though. It's... 288 00:11:30,606 --> 00:11:33,040 - It's okay, it's okay. - Okay, Brett. Give me a drumbeat. 289 00:11:33,075 --> 00:11:34,274 - O... okay. - (drumming) 290 00:11:34,309 --> 00:11:35,876 Dudley: That's right. 291 00:11:35,911 --> 00:11:37,911 Keep it coming. Keep it coming. 292 00:11:37,947 --> 00:11:39,546 - And, Paul... - Yeah? 293 00:11:39,581 --> 00:11:40,814 What are you gonna do 294 00:11:40,850 --> 00:11:43,016 when the sandworm attacks, man?! 295 00:11:43,051 --> 00:11:44,050 (drum beating) 296 00:11:44,085 --> 00:11:46,252 You gonna give me that mind control? 297 00:11:46,287 --> 00:11:47,391 - Yeah! - You're gonna give me 298 00:11:47,545 --> 00:11:48,648 - that mind control?! - Uh-huh. 299 00:11:49,277 --> 00:11:51,658 - Now get rid of the puppet. - I can't get rid of the puppet. 300 00:11:51,693 --> 00:11:53,860 Come on, Alex. You are the star, man, 301 00:11:53,895 --> 00:11:55,995 - not that fucking puppet! - No. The puppet's an extension of me. 302 00:11:56,031 --> 00:11:57,948 - Get rid of the puppet, man! - I think you should get rid of 303 00:11:58,097 --> 00:11:59,865 the puppet, Alex. Just do it. 304 00:11:59,900 --> 00:12:01,867 - (buzzing) - (whirring) 305 00:12:01,902 --> 00:12:03,234 - (inhales deeply) - Yeah. Do it. 306 00:12:03,270 --> 00:12:04,469 Give me those eyes. 307 00:12:05,939 --> 00:12:06,972 Yeah! 308 00:12:10,878 --> 00:12:13,244 Okay, Pappas! I warned you 309 00:12:13,280 --> 00:12:15,681 about charging your buddy's car 310 00:12:15,716 --> 00:12:18,549 and about this loud, weirdo shit going on in here! 311 00:12:18,584 --> 00:12:20,284 Now you're out! 312 00:12:26,959 --> 00:12:28,592 What did he just say? 313 00:12:29,696 --> 00:12:30,661 (party music plays) 314 00:12:30,697 --> 00:12:33,430 It's like a fuckin' airport. 315 00:12:33,465 --> 00:12:35,331 All right, let me look at you. 316 00:12:35,366 --> 00:12:36,700 Okay. 317 00:12:36,735 --> 00:12:39,135 - Let's break out the big guns. - Oh, Tina. No. 318 00:12:39,171 --> 00:12:41,370 - Yeah. - I don't wanna look, like... chesty. 319 00:12:41,406 --> 00:12:43,807 You need to prove to everybody that you are a leader 320 00:12:43,842 --> 00:12:46,009 and you can get this done. 321 00:12:46,044 --> 00:12:48,344 - Th... this way? - Yes. 322 00:12:48,379 --> 00:12:51,413 Well, you know, I'm not in competition with Anna. 323 00:12:51,448 --> 00:12:54,282 Yeah, but she's in competition with you. 324 00:13:05,096 --> 00:13:06,528 Michelle! 325 00:13:06,563 --> 00:13:08,596 Hi, beautiful. 326 00:13:08,631 --> 00:13:09,396 Wow. 327 00:13:09,432 --> 00:13:12,433 - You look so beautiful. - Oh, hi. 328 00:13:13,302 --> 00:13:14,869 Oh, this is my sister, Tina. 329 00:13:14,904 --> 00:13:15,703 Tina. Hi. 330 00:13:15,739 --> 00:13:18,372 - Oh, my goodness. Hello. Muah! - Oh! 331 00:13:18,407 --> 00:13:19,774 - So good to see you. - You too. 332 00:13:19,809 --> 00:13:22,176 Anna: So it's all happening. Look at all the people. 333 00:13:22,212 --> 00:13:23,277 - It's great. - Michelle: Yeah. 334 00:13:23,312 --> 00:13:25,245 There's so many. Um... 335 00:13:25,280 --> 00:13:27,480 who are all these people? 336 00:13:27,515 --> 00:13:30,416 Oh, it's a lot of Ben's friends from work, 337 00:13:30,452 --> 00:13:33,220 some of my friends, a lot of Westside money. It's really great. 338 00:13:33,255 --> 00:13:35,588 I think even if we get a handful of them, 339 00:13:35,624 --> 00:13:37,490 we're, like, halfway to our goal. 340 00:13:37,525 --> 00:13:38,458 It's gonna be amazing. 341 00:13:38,493 --> 00:13:40,927 So, you guys come on in. Make yourselves at home. 342 00:13:40,963 --> 00:13:42,661 I'm gonna go do my thing. 343 00:13:42,696 --> 00:13:44,630 - Tina, it's so nice to meet you. - You too! 344 00:13:44,665 --> 00:13:46,441 - Oh, God. - What the fuck is that, 345 00:13:46,561 --> 00:13:49,802 - a wedding dress? - Looks like it. 346 00:13:49,837 --> 00:13:53,572 - Okay, this is a charter school party. - I know. 347 00:13:53,607 --> 00:13:56,041 This is, like, so rich. 348 00:13:56,077 --> 00:13:57,309 You want a drink? 349 00:13:57,344 --> 00:13:58,710 - Yes. - Okay. 350 00:13:58,746 --> 00:14:00,444 - Yes. - Meet you back here. 351 00:14:00,480 --> 00:14:03,248 Anna: Oh, boy. Do you just bathe in coconut oil? 352 00:14:03,283 --> 00:14:05,083 Your skin is like velvet. 353 00:14:05,118 --> 00:14:06,985 Mm! Good to see you, honey. 354 00:14:07,020 --> 00:14:08,686 Guys, you made it. 355 00:14:08,721 --> 00:14:10,088 I can't believe it. 356 00:14:10,123 --> 00:14:12,824 (phone vibrates) 357 00:14:14,127 --> 00:14:15,260 Hello? 358 00:14:16,361 --> 00:14:19,096 What up, Big C? 359 00:14:20,565 --> 00:14:21,799 (chuckles) 360 00:14:21,834 --> 00:14:24,001 Yeah, man. 361 00:14:24,036 --> 00:14:25,803 So, uh, what's on your mind? 362 00:14:25,838 --> 00:14:29,173 Big C: How do you feel about a million dollars? 363 00:14:30,810 --> 00:14:32,009 Are you kidding me? 364 00:14:32,044 --> 00:14:34,443 I never kid about money, bitch! 365 00:14:34,478 --> 00:14:37,680 Jesus Christ! You're on the show, motherfucker! 366 00:14:37,715 --> 00:14:39,248 Offer just went to your agent. 367 00:14:39,284 --> 00:14:40,283 Go buy a car, 368 00:14:40,318 --> 00:14:41,818 go buy a fuckin' boat, 369 00:14:41,853 --> 00:14:43,419 sink the boat, buy a new boat! 370 00:14:43,454 --> 00:14:46,022 - Let's do it! Pappas! - (gasps) 371 00:14:47,091 --> 00:14:48,390 (door opens) 372 00:14:51,628 --> 00:14:53,661 What's going on? 373 00:14:53,697 --> 00:14:55,563 Oh, it's just work stuff. 374 00:15:02,206 --> 00:15:03,305 You know, you can tell me 375 00:15:03,340 --> 00:15:05,540 about work. You don't have to, like... 376 00:15:05,575 --> 00:15:08,442 hide and be ashamed. 377 00:15:08,477 --> 00:15:10,344 - I'm not ashamed. - Well, you, like, 378 00:15:10,379 --> 00:15:12,446 never take the calls in front of me. 379 00:15:12,481 --> 00:15:13,881 Like, somebody calls and you, like, 380 00:15:13,916 --> 00:15:15,549 run down the hall or something. 381 00:15:15,584 --> 00:15:16,817 - It just feels... - Okay. 382 00:15:16,853 --> 00:15:19,820 Um, that was, um, Big C. 383 00:15:19,856 --> 00:15:23,224 He offered me a full-time job on the show... 384 00:15:23,259 --> 00:15:24,924 for two years... 385 00:15:24,960 --> 00:15:28,094 for huge money. 386 00:15:28,129 --> 00:15:30,864 I... I don't know what I'm gonna do about it, so... 387 00:15:30,899 --> 00:15:32,165 Whoa. 388 00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:35,134 Right. And it's that look that you're giving me 389 00:15:35,170 --> 00:15:36,903 right now... 390 00:15:36,938 --> 00:15:37,937 which is the reason why 391 00:15:37,973 --> 00:15:40,706 I can't tell you this stuff 'cause if for one second 392 00:15:40,742 --> 00:15:43,408 I entertain doing anything other than being in our little 393 00:15:43,443 --> 00:15:45,143 playpen of "Dune," 394 00:15:45,179 --> 00:15:46,684 you look at me like I'm a sell-out, man! 395 00:15:46,813 --> 00:15:48,381 Dude, that... That's on you, okay? 396 00:15:48,415 --> 00:15:52,851 Honestly, if you want to fuckin' be a Russian vampire, 397 00:15:52,887 --> 00:15:54,552 - like, go be a Russian vampire. - It's a somnambulist. 398 00:15:54,588 --> 00:15:57,455 Well, if you want to waste your time and your life 399 00:15:57,491 --> 00:15:59,190 - playing that shit, then fine. - I'm not trying to 400 00:15:59,225 --> 00:16:00,424 waste my time, man. 401 00:16:00,459 --> 00:16:01,993 What are you talking about? 402 00:16:02,028 --> 00:16:04,195 Just because you for the moment 403 00:16:04,230 --> 00:16:05,796 have taken a vacation 404 00:16:05,831 --> 00:16:07,965 in fairy land from your life 405 00:16:08,001 --> 00:16:09,066 and, you know, you're living 406 00:16:09,102 --> 00:16:12,370 inside of Frank Herbert's imagination, and you hooked up 407 00:16:12,405 --> 00:16:14,738 with a random girl from Uber, 408 00:16:14,774 --> 00:16:16,940 like, I'm not doing it wrong 409 00:16:16,975 --> 00:16:19,376 just because I'm not right there with you, you know? 410 00:16:19,411 --> 00:16:20,576 So... 411 00:16:23,315 --> 00:16:24,381 Uh... 412 00:16:28,320 --> 00:16:30,153 Yeah... 413 00:16:30,188 --> 00:16:33,422 No. Okay, okay. Uh... 414 00:16:37,628 --> 00:16:39,828 Tina: They're all married. 415 00:16:39,863 --> 00:16:42,331 It's fuckin' hopeless. 416 00:16:42,366 --> 00:16:45,367 Might as well get a sperm donor right now. 417 00:16:45,403 --> 00:16:47,169 Might get some money for the school. 418 00:16:47,204 --> 00:16:48,337 - Oh, we're all set. - Of course. 419 00:16:48,372 --> 00:16:50,104 - We're good. We're gonna be fine. - Yeah. 420 00:16:50,140 --> 00:16:52,706 I need to find that e-mail. 421 00:16:52,742 --> 00:16:54,208 What e-mail? 422 00:16:54,244 --> 00:16:55,843 Yeah. 423 00:16:55,878 --> 00:16:59,414 Can you create a distraction? 424 00:16:59,449 --> 00:17:00,982 What? 425 00:17:01,017 --> 00:17:02,317 I just... 426 00:17:02,352 --> 00:17:05,353 I need to get up those stairs without anyone seeing me. 427 00:17:05,388 --> 00:17:07,854 Please? You're good at, like, getting people's attention. 428 00:17:07,889 --> 00:17:09,722 Can you just, like, do a thing? 429 00:17:10,826 --> 00:17:13,460 You want me to do a thing? 430 00:17:13,495 --> 00:17:15,062 Yeah. 431 00:17:31,446 --> 00:17:32,578 Excuse me! 432 00:17:32,613 --> 00:17:33,912 Excuse me! 433 00:17:33,948 --> 00:17:35,814 Over here, everyone! 434 00:17:35,850 --> 00:17:37,183 I'd just like to make a toast 435 00:17:37,218 --> 00:17:39,985 to our beautiful hostess, Anna. 436 00:17:40,020 --> 00:17:43,054 Anna, this party is off the hook. 437 00:17:43,090 --> 00:17:44,755 We are all so grateful. 438 00:17:44,791 --> 00:17:46,591 And everybody over here, 439 00:17:46,626 --> 00:17:47,993 let's just take one minute 440 00:17:48,028 --> 00:17:50,061 to look over here. 441 00:17:50,097 --> 00:17:52,230 Attention over here so we can celebrate 442 00:17:52,265 --> 00:17:54,132 this wonderful woman. 443 00:17:54,167 --> 00:17:55,200 This is the kind of woman 444 00:17:55,235 --> 00:17:57,234 who comes in and takes charge... 445 00:17:57,269 --> 00:17:58,668 whether you want her to or not, 446 00:17:58,704 --> 00:18:01,805 and that is what we need for our schools, right, everybody? 447 00:18:01,840 --> 00:18:05,775 And I don't know about you, but I am so inspired 448 00:18:05,811 --> 00:18:07,978 tonight, and in fact, 449 00:18:08,014 --> 00:18:10,847 I am gonna sing a song about it... 450 00:18:10,883 --> 00:18:12,449 because... 451 00:18:12,485 --> 00:18:14,950 that's how inspired I am. 452 00:18:14,986 --> 00:18:17,753 So... here it goes. 453 00:18:19,057 --> 00:18:21,924 I'm gonna make a change 454 00:18:21,959 --> 00:18:26,129 For once in my life 455 00:18:27,032 --> 00:18:29,332 It's gonna feel real good 456 00:18:29,367 --> 00:18:30,933 It's gonna make a difference 457 00:18:30,968 --> 00:18:35,537 It's gonna make it right 458 00:18:35,572 --> 00:18:37,072 (laughs) 459 00:18:37,107 --> 00:18:38,940 (mumbles) 460 00:18:38,975 --> 00:18:42,010 And the wind that blows 461 00:19:31,425 --> 00:19:32,491 Mich? 462 00:19:34,328 --> 00:19:35,927 What the fuck are you doing? 463 00:19:37,431 --> 00:19:39,197 - (whispers) - Oh, my God! 464 00:19:39,232 --> 00:19:42,166 - You almost gave me a heart attack. - Why are you on the floor? 465 00:19:42,202 --> 00:19:45,103 Come help me look up this e-mail. 466 00:19:48,108 --> 00:19:49,673 Okay... 467 00:19:50,710 --> 00:19:52,543 Oh, I got it. I got it. 468 00:19:54,247 --> 00:19:56,279 Michelle: Oh, my God. 469 00:19:58,750 --> 00:20:00,717 This bitch. Fucking cunt. 470 00:20:00,752 --> 00:20:03,920 - This bitch deliberately left me off. - She did. 471 00:20:09,261 --> 00:20:11,861 Feel so good 472 00:20:11,896 --> 00:20:13,029 Hi there. 473 00:20:13,064 --> 00:20:17,266 I hear that you called for an UberX-tremely sexy! 474 00:20:17,301 --> 00:20:19,502 Um, hey, Brett. 475 00:20:19,537 --> 00:20:21,003 You, um... 476 00:20:21,038 --> 00:20:25,874 You can't just, like, show up at my house like this. 477 00:20:25,909 --> 00:20:27,209 Oh, shit. 478 00:20:27,245 --> 00:20:29,478 Um... fuck. I'm sorry. I... 479 00:20:29,514 --> 00:20:31,212 I'm sorry. It's just that, um, 480 00:20:31,248 --> 00:20:33,448 you know, I'm, like, I'm an independent woman... 481 00:20:33,483 --> 00:20:35,816 - Right, I get it. I get it. - And I could have... 482 00:20:35,852 --> 00:20:39,621 any number of things going on in my apartment. 483 00:20:41,924 --> 00:20:43,191 - Are you fucking with me right now? - Yes! 484 00:20:43,226 --> 00:20:44,759 - What the... I thought you were boning - I'm fucking with you. 485 00:20:44,794 --> 00:20:48,128 - dudes in here! What's... Jesus! - Get in here please! 486 00:20:48,164 --> 00:20:49,329 - Ki-ya! - (laughs) 487 00:20:49,365 --> 00:20:51,298 Sorry. That just... I don't know why I did that. 488 00:20:51,333 --> 00:20:52,766 You know what? I brought you a gift. 489 00:20:52,801 --> 00:20:54,668 - Oh? - It's an "I'm sorry" gift 490 00:20:54,703 --> 00:20:57,003 - for karate chopping you. - Well, you're... thinking ahead. 491 00:20:57,039 --> 00:20:58,505 - This is what I... this is what... - I like that. 492 00:20:58,541 --> 00:21:00,374 I knew I was gonna do something stupid when I got here, so I was like, 493 00:21:00,409 --> 00:21:02,442 - "I'm gonna bring you a gift." - Foresight. 494 00:21:02,478 --> 00:21:03,644 Mm-hmm. 495 00:21:03,679 --> 00:21:05,878 - No, no, no. - Yes, yes, yes. 496 00:21:05,913 --> 00:21:09,948 Did you make me a... A Just the Rain shirt? 497 00:21:09,984 --> 00:21:11,484 I will say it's one of a kind. 498 00:21:11,519 --> 00:21:13,452 - This is beautiful. - This one's for me. 499 00:21:13,488 --> 00:21:15,288 Oh... 500 00:21:15,323 --> 00:21:16,622 Yeah. 501 00:21:16,658 --> 00:21:18,274 - Look at him! - Sometimes you gotta break up 502 00:21:18,421 --> 00:21:20,827 - with the band if you want to be free. - Yes. 503 00:21:20,861 --> 00:21:22,494 - If you want to fly. - Yes. 504 00:21:22,529 --> 00:21:24,896 But I feel like to make it complete, we have to 505 00:21:24,931 --> 00:21:26,264 try them on though. 506 00:21:26,300 --> 00:21:28,151 Um, I'm interested in seeing that shirt on you for sure. 507 00:21:30,579 --> 00:21:31,836 Well, um... I'm not wearing a bra currently. 508 00:21:31,871 --> 00:21:33,672 Hm. 509 00:21:33,707 --> 00:21:35,807 I'm in if you're in. 510 00:21:38,044 --> 00:21:40,311 Anna: It was a total nightmare. 511 00:21:40,346 --> 00:21:42,479 All day long he wouldn't eat his dinner. 512 00:21:42,515 --> 00:21:43,947 He's, like, throwing potatoes at me. 513 00:21:43,982 --> 00:21:45,316 And at, like, 9:30 at night, 514 00:21:45,351 --> 00:21:47,351 He's asleep with a crown on his head. 515 00:21:47,386 --> 00:21:48,952 - Oh, that is so precious. - Excuse me. 516 00:21:48,987 --> 00:21:51,188 - Hey! Hey! - Can I please talk to you for a minute? 517 00:21:51,224 --> 00:21:53,390 Of course, yeah. What's going on? 518 00:21:53,426 --> 00:21:57,260 Uh, can it be alone? 519 00:21:57,295 --> 00:21:59,161 Anna: You know what? I will find you ladies later. 520 00:21:59,197 --> 00:22:00,896 Have so much fun, okay? 521 00:22:00,932 --> 00:22:04,100 What's going on, Michelle? 522 00:22:04,135 --> 00:22:05,101 What are you doing? 523 00:22:05,136 --> 00:22:08,170 Throwing an awesome party. What are you doing? 524 00:22:08,206 --> 00:22:10,106 Why are you trying to push me out? 525 00:22:10,141 --> 00:22:12,274 What are you talking about, Michelle? 526 00:22:12,309 --> 00:22:15,143 Anna, you have been calling meetings without me. 527 00:22:15,178 --> 00:22:17,479 No, I haven't. 528 00:22:17,514 --> 00:22:19,147 Yes, you have. 529 00:22:19,182 --> 00:22:21,082 - No. - Stop lying! 530 00:22:21,118 --> 00:22:23,051 - What? - Stop lying. 531 00:22:23,086 --> 00:22:24,152 Stop lying. 532 00:22:24,187 --> 00:22:25,411 You've been calling meetings without me. 533 00:22:25,466 --> 00:22:26,722 - No, I haven't. - I know that you have. 534 00:22:26,753 --> 00:22:27,753 What? 535 00:22:27,758 --> 00:22:30,758 I... I looked at your e-mail account, okay? 536 00:22:30,793 --> 00:22:32,593 So, I know that you have. 537 00:22:32,629 --> 00:22:34,194 I'm sorry? 538 00:22:34,230 --> 00:22:35,229 You... 539 00:22:35,265 --> 00:22:37,665 I... Tracy told me. 540 00:22:37,700 --> 00:22:40,901 So, I looked at your computer. 541 00:22:42,405 --> 00:22:43,437 Anna, I am... 542 00:22:43,473 --> 00:22:45,906 really grateful for all the help that you've given me, 543 00:22:45,941 --> 00:22:49,809 but please know that I have built the school 544 00:22:49,844 --> 00:22:51,444 from the ground up. 545 00:22:51,480 --> 00:22:53,513 I have put my whole heart into this, 546 00:22:53,548 --> 00:22:56,516 and this crazy fundraiser 547 00:22:56,551 --> 00:22:58,985 with super-rich people is just not 548 00:22:59,020 --> 00:23:01,521 what I want to be doing! 549 00:23:04,892 --> 00:23:07,159 Are you done? 550 00:23:07,194 --> 00:23:09,295 Uh, yes. 551 00:23:09,330 --> 00:23:11,997 Because from where I stand, Michelle, 552 00:23:12,032 --> 00:23:15,901 you don't seem to be doing anything. 553 00:23:15,936 --> 00:23:18,236 Without me, none of this 554 00:23:18,272 --> 00:23:19,371 would be happening. 555 00:23:19,407 --> 00:23:20,571 So, yeah, Michelle, 556 00:23:20,607 --> 00:23:22,340 I'm taking a little bit of initiative, 557 00:23:22,375 --> 00:23:23,841 and I would like a fucking thank you 558 00:23:23,876 --> 00:23:26,377 - for saving your ass! - This is my school. 559 00:23:26,413 --> 00:23:28,828 It's my project, okay? You don't get to just come in 560 00:23:28,973 --> 00:23:30,848 - and take it. - Are you kidding me? 561 00:23:30,883 --> 00:23:33,017 Without me, you don't have a fucking school, 562 00:23:33,052 --> 00:23:35,820 and these rich people, these are the people 563 00:23:35,855 --> 00:23:38,455 who by the end of the night will have our entire school 564 00:23:38,490 --> 00:23:41,224 funded, and right now, you are getting in the way, 565 00:23:41,259 --> 00:23:44,127 and that is why I don't invite you to meetings. 566 00:23:44,162 --> 00:23:45,796 I think you are completely 567 00:23:45,831 --> 00:23:48,898 ineffective, I think you're crazy incomp... 568 00:23:48,934 --> 00:23:49,966 No! 569 00:23:52,003 --> 00:23:53,403 Yeah! 570 00:23:53,439 --> 00:23:55,070 Ha! 571 00:23:56,708 --> 00:23:57,840 Oh, my... 572 00:23:57,875 --> 00:24:00,075 (Tina cackles) 573 00:24:00,436 --> 00:24:04,569 - Synced and corrected by MasterCookie - - www.addic7ed.com - 574 00:24:04,615 --> 00:24:05,815 I thought I'd learn 575 00:24:05,850 --> 00:24:08,484 From my mistakes 576 00:24:08,519 --> 00:24:09,652 I thought he'd learn 577 00:24:09,687 --> 00:24:11,519 From my mistakes 578 00:24:11,555 --> 00:24:13,187 I thought you'd give me 579 00:24:13,223 --> 00:24:15,323 The right advice 580 00:24:15,359 --> 00:24:17,191 I thought he'd let me in 581 00:24:17,227 --> 00:24:20,027 For one last time 582 00:24:33,642 --> 00:24:35,376 The planks rattle around 583 00:24:35,411 --> 00:24:37,310 Like an old-timey movie 584 00:24:37,346 --> 00:24:38,945 In tube-top and shorts 585 00:24:38,981 --> 00:24:41,382 That Vice called "pull-me-down" 586 00:24:41,417 --> 00:24:42,549 And he's ignoring me 587 00:24:42,585 --> 00:24:44,451 Like it's 2001 588 00:24:48,155 --> 00:24:49,822 Why keep time traveling 589 00:24:49,858 --> 00:24:51,691 If it doesn't get better 590 00:24:51,726 --> 00:24:54,994 On the second time around? 591 00:24:55,029 --> 00:24:56,962 Why keep time traveling 592 00:24:56,998 --> 00:24:58,531 If it doesn't get better 593 00:24:58,566 --> 00:25:01,901 On the second time around? 594 00:25:01,936 --> 00:25:03,001 I thought I'd learn 595 00:25:03,036 --> 00:25:05,203 From my mistakes 596 00:25:05,238 --> 00:25:06,438 I thought he'd learn 597 00:25:06,473 --> 00:25:08,473 From my mistakes 598 00:25:08,509 --> 00:25:10,275 I thought you'd give me 599 00:25:10,310 --> 00:25:12,043 The right advice 600 00:25:12,078 --> 00:25:14,245 I thought he'd let me in 601 00:25:14,281 --> 00:25:17,248 For one last time 602 00:25:30,429 --> 00:25:33,531 (Soft piano notes) 603 00:25:33,633 --> 00:25:35,098 604 00:25:36,235 --> 00:25:38,435 (Light instrumental music) 605 00:25:38,470 --> 00:25:41,538 606 00:25:41,573 --> 00:25:42,472 (Music fades) 607 00:25:42,522 --> 00:25:47,072 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 41887

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