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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:02:58,900 --> 00:03:00,610 You derelicts know what time it is? 2 00:03:00,860 --> 00:03:01,804 What? 3 00:03:01,904 --> 00:03:04,531 It is bug-betting time! All right?! 4 00:03:04,906 --> 00:03:07,742 First bug to get fried wins $2. I got the green one. 5 00:03:07,909 --> 00:03:09,244 $2 on the June bug. 6 00:03:14,040 --> 00:03:18,253 You must actually let go of the money in order for it to be a bet. 7 00:03:18,420 --> 00:03:21,881 Round and round she goes, where she stops... Number 2! 8 00:03:32,058 --> 00:03:34,519 Any of you shitheads ever get bored? 9 00:03:35,604 --> 00:03:37,063 You ever get bored? 10 00:03:38,607 --> 00:03:40,400 'Cause I got a riddle. 11 00:03:42,110 --> 00:03:45,238 Takes about 2 ounces of brains to figure it out. 12 00:03:45,614 --> 00:03:48,575 Anybody think they got a brain with 2 ounces of brain? 13 00:03:48,742 --> 00:03:50,785 There's a rumor Earl does. 14 00:03:52,078 --> 00:03:56,082 For chrissakes, boys, come on, a little self-confidence from the gallery. 15 00:03:56,249 --> 00:03:57,918 This ain't long division. 16 00:03:58,084 --> 00:04:00,629 - How much we got to lose? - Want to liven things up? 17 00:04:00,795 --> 00:04:02,589 That's a hell of an idea! 18 00:04:03,465 --> 00:04:06,927 Everyone puts in 20 bucks. Pot goes to whoever solves the riddle. 19 00:04:07,093 --> 00:04:08,637 You'll get the riddle. 20 00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:12,935 I'm the one asking the riddle. 21 00:04:13,102 --> 00:04:15,897 I already know the answer. I don't get a guess. 22 00:04:17,065 --> 00:04:20,109 Although we could say if I get to 500 bounces on the wedge... 23 00:04:20,777 --> 00:04:23,446 ...and no one gets the riddle, I get the pot. 24 00:04:24,113 --> 00:04:26,908 Now, I know you're thinking it's an impossible riddle. 25 00:04:27,075 --> 00:04:28,618 It's not. It's easy. 26 00:04:28,785 --> 00:04:31,454 And if somehow, by the grace of fluke luck... 27 00:04:31,621 --> 00:04:35,750 ...I win and y'all don't agree that it was an easy riddle, then... 28 00:04:36,417 --> 00:04:37,960 ...I'll refund your money. 29 00:04:41,297 --> 00:04:42,282 I'm in! 30 00:04:42,382 --> 00:04:43,591 Money in the bank. 31 00:04:43,800 --> 00:04:44,765 I'll hold it. 32 00:04:44,865 --> 00:04:45,739 Give it. 33 00:04:45,839 --> 00:04:48,763 A man's driving down the road with his son. 34 00:04:48,930 --> 00:04:50,139 He gets in a crash. 35 00:04:50,431 --> 00:04:51,474 Two ambulances come... 36 00:04:51,641 --> 00:04:54,477 ...and they take the man and his son to different hospitals. 37 00:04:55,436 --> 00:04:56,813 Different hospitals. 38 00:04:57,271 --> 00:05:00,316 Son goes into the operating room, all right? 39 00:05:00,650 --> 00:05:02,819 Doctor looks at him, says: 40 00:05:03,486 --> 00:05:05,613 "I can't operate on this boy. 41 00:05:05,947 --> 00:05:07,156 He's my son." 42 00:05:07,323 --> 00:05:09,659 Now, how is that possible? 43 00:05:10,284 --> 00:05:12,286 How is that possible? 44 00:05:23,464 --> 00:05:24,841 Clock's ticking. 45 00:05:25,007 --> 00:05:26,509 Father's at the other hospital? 46 00:05:26,676 --> 00:05:28,010 He didn't sneak over? 47 00:05:28,177 --> 00:05:29,679 No one beamed him aboard. 48 00:05:29,971 --> 00:05:34,183 All right, what if the father married the son's daughter? 49 00:05:34,350 --> 00:05:35,685 This is a family riddle. 50 00:05:36,185 --> 00:05:37,353 Think clean thoughts. 51 00:05:37,520 --> 00:05:38,855 Give us a hint. 52 00:05:39,022 --> 00:05:40,481 You want a hint? 53 00:05:41,315 --> 00:05:43,026 The doctor's a woman. 54 00:05:45,486 --> 00:05:47,321 The doctor's a woman. 55 00:05:49,198 --> 00:05:51,492 The doctor's the son's mother. 56 00:05:51,826 --> 00:05:55,830 Feminists pose the riddle to reveal sexual stereotypes. 57 00:05:55,997 --> 00:05:58,332 I take it you're a feminist. 58 00:06:00,334 --> 00:06:04,005 I've been called many things, but never been saddled with that. 59 00:06:04,172 --> 00:06:05,840 You might try being saddled. 60 00:06:06,049 --> 00:06:08,009 Smell of leather, a whip's sting. 61 00:06:09,010 --> 00:06:11,721 I'm just a humble golf pro. Could I help you? 62 00:06:11,888 --> 00:06:13,389 You're Roy McAvoy? 63 00:06:15,350 --> 00:06:17,810 I pictured something different. 64 00:06:18,519 --> 00:06:19,896 I have a 7:00 lesson. 65 00:06:20,229 --> 00:06:21,689 I thought I had a Dr. Griswold. 66 00:06:25,193 --> 00:06:26,527 That's me. 67 00:06:36,746 --> 00:06:40,208 First thing you must learn is this game ain't about hitting... 68 00:06:40,375 --> 00:06:41,709 ...a ball in a hole. 69 00:06:41,876 --> 00:06:45,713 It's about inner demons, self-doubt, human frailty... 70 00:06:45,880 --> 00:06:47,423 ...and overcoming that crap. 71 00:06:47,590 --> 00:06:50,259 What kind of doctor did you say you were? 72 00:06:50,426 --> 00:06:51,427 Psychologist. 73 00:06:51,928 --> 00:06:56,224 I'm a neo-Jungian, post-modern Freudian, holistic secularist. 74 00:06:58,226 --> 00:06:59,226 Okay. 75 00:07:00,061 --> 00:07:02,438 Inner demons and human frailty is my life's work. 76 00:07:02,605 --> 00:07:05,441 I used to practice in El Paso, but I moved here now. 77 00:07:05,775 --> 00:07:07,735 What is all this stuff? 78 00:07:07,902 --> 00:07:09,612 I got it from the Golf Channel. 79 00:07:09,779 --> 00:07:12,407 Well, it's a waste of money. 80 00:07:12,782 --> 00:07:17,078 I'm sure there are some excesses and repetitions here, 81 00:07:17,245 --> 00:07:19,580 but I believe in gathering knowledge. 82 00:07:19,747 --> 00:07:22,750 There must be some truth to the golf swing illustrated here... 83 00:07:22,917 --> 00:07:26,087 I thought you would kind of help me sort through it. 84 00:07:26,254 --> 00:07:28,464 I have dozens of golf videotapes. 85 00:07:28,631 --> 00:07:29,966 I bet she has a golf watch. 86 00:07:30,299 --> 00:07:31,426 Got a golf watch? 87 00:07:31,968 --> 00:07:33,928 I think I got a good one. 88 00:07:34,262 --> 00:07:35,430 Right there. 89 00:07:35,805 --> 00:07:37,265 Take it off. 90 00:07:37,473 --> 00:07:38,357 Off? 91 00:07:38,457 --> 00:07:40,643 All of it, right now. All of it. 92 00:07:40,810 --> 00:07:43,146 You're a smart woman, for chrissakes. 93 00:07:44,814 --> 00:07:47,275 Don't you know the work of hustlers when you see it? 94 00:07:47,483 --> 00:07:48,776 Well, no. 95 00:07:50,111 --> 00:07:51,320 I mean... 96 00:07:52,155 --> 00:07:54,949 ...I can always tell when someone's lying to himself. 97 00:07:55,116 --> 00:07:58,286 But I'm susceptible and frequently wrong when a person lies to me. 98 00:07:58,453 --> 00:08:00,913 This stuff cost me over $200. 99 00:08:01,122 --> 00:08:03,291 It's $200 of shit. 100 00:08:04,500 --> 00:08:06,627 Well, that's just great. 101 00:08:06,794 --> 00:08:09,672 Let's do this the old-fashioned way. Just swing. 102 00:08:10,465 --> 00:08:11,632 All right. 103 00:08:20,183 --> 00:08:21,184 Come up. 104 00:08:24,145 --> 00:08:25,355 Excuse me. 105 00:08:30,193 --> 00:08:31,193 Fuck. 106 00:08:33,654 --> 00:08:35,490 You talk like a golfer. 107 00:08:35,656 --> 00:08:38,201 That's a pretty girl to have such an ugly swing. 108 00:08:39,827 --> 00:08:40,995 Oh, God! 109 00:08:41,162 --> 00:08:42,663 Oh, that hurt. 110 00:08:42,830 --> 00:08:43,830 Shit! 111 00:08:45,708 --> 00:08:47,168 "Fuck." "Shit." 112 00:08:47,335 --> 00:08:49,170 These are technical golf terms. 113 00:08:49,337 --> 00:08:51,339 You're using them on your first lesson. 114 00:08:51,881 --> 00:08:53,341 This is promising. 115 00:08:53,508 --> 00:08:54,508 Great. 116 00:08:54,717 --> 00:08:57,553 Wise-ass. Show me. Just go ahead. 117 00:09:11,734 --> 00:09:13,194 Something like that. 118 00:09:14,070 --> 00:09:15,571 That's impressive. 119 00:09:15,863 --> 00:09:18,199 I tend to process things verbally... 120 00:09:18,366 --> 00:09:21,202 ...so can you break down into words how you did that? 121 00:09:26,749 --> 00:09:29,711 "What Is The Golf Swing," by Roy McAvoy? 122 00:09:31,546 --> 00:09:33,923 I think of the golf swing as a poem. 123 00:09:34,090 --> 00:09:36,217 He's doing that poetry thing again. 124 00:09:36,384 --> 00:09:39,595 The opening phrase of this poem will always be the grip. 125 00:09:39,887 --> 00:09:43,766 The hands unite to form a single unit by the simple overlap of the... 126 00:09:44,934 --> 00:09:46,060 ...little finger. 127 00:09:46,227 --> 00:09:47,212 Right. 128 00:09:47,312 --> 00:09:49,397 Lowly and slowly... 129 00:09:49,564 --> 00:09:53,234 ...the club head is led back, pulled into position not by the hands, 130 00:09:53,401 --> 00:09:55,570 ...but the body, which turns away from the target, 131 00:09:55,737 --> 00:09:58,614 ...shifting weight to the right side without shifting balance. 132 00:09:58,781 --> 00:10:03,077 Tempo is all, perfection unattainable, as at the top of the swing... 133 00:10:03,244 --> 00:10:06,122 ...there's a hesitation, a little nod to the gods. 134 00:10:06,956 --> 00:10:09,083 A nod to the gods? 135 00:10:09,584 --> 00:10:12,295 To the gods that he is fallible. 136 00:10:12,920 --> 00:10:14,797 That perfection is unattainable. 137 00:10:14,964 --> 00:10:18,926 Weight shifts to the left pulled by the powers in the earth... 138 00:10:19,093 --> 00:10:21,262 ...it's alive, this swing, and a sculpture... 139 00:10:21,429 --> 00:10:23,765 ...and down through contact... 140 00:10:23,931 --> 00:10:26,100 ...striking the ball crisply... 141 00:10:26,309 --> 00:10:27,602 ...with character. 142 00:10:27,769 --> 00:10:31,606 A tuning fork goes off in your heart, your balls... 143 00:10:32,482 --> 00:10:35,610 ...such a pure feeling is the well-struck golf shot. 144 00:10:36,486 --> 00:10:38,488 Then the follow-through to finish... 145 00:10:38,654 --> 00:10:40,114 ...always on line. 146 00:10:40,281 --> 00:10:42,992 The reverse-C of the Golden Bear... 147 00:10:43,618 --> 00:10:46,496 ...the steelworkers' power and the brawn of Carl Sandburg's... 148 00:10:46,829 --> 00:10:48,623 ...Arnold Palmer! 149 00:10:49,624 --> 00:10:51,459 He's doing the "Arnold Palmer" thing. 150 00:10:52,293 --> 00:10:54,170 And the unfinished symphony of... 151 00:10:54,504 --> 00:10:56,297 ...Roy McAvoy. 152 00:10:58,132 --> 00:10:59,842 What's unfinished? 153 00:11:00,968 --> 00:11:04,806 I have a short follow-through. It has an unfinished look. 154 00:11:05,515 --> 00:11:06,515 Why? 155 00:11:07,975 --> 00:11:12,146 Some say it's the easiest way to play in the winds of west Texas... 156 00:11:12,313 --> 00:11:16,359 ...some say it's because I never finished anything in my life. 157 00:11:17,151 --> 00:11:19,612 You can decide. But the point is... 158 00:11:19,862 --> 00:11:22,156 ...every finishing position is unique. 159 00:11:24,659 --> 00:11:26,536 That's what the golf swing's about. 160 00:11:27,870 --> 00:11:30,832 It's about gaining control of your life and... 161 00:11:31,040 --> 00:11:33,167 ...letting go at the same time. 162 00:11:35,545 --> 00:11:36,838 Jeez Louise. 163 00:11:37,004 --> 00:11:40,007 There's only one other acceptable theory about how to hit the ball. 164 00:11:40,174 --> 00:11:42,719 Oh, boy, well, I'm afraid to ask. 165 00:11:42,885 --> 00:11:44,887 What's the other theory? 166 00:11:45,054 --> 00:11:47,056 Grip it and rip it. 167 00:11:49,726 --> 00:11:51,728 Well, you know... 168 00:11:52,395 --> 00:11:55,732 ...while I do appreciate your poetic sensibility, Mr. McAvoy... 169 00:11:55,898 --> 00:11:57,734 Call me Roy, Molly. 170 00:11:57,900 --> 00:12:02,572 Call me Dr. Griswold, Roy. I think I'm more of the grip it and rip it school. 171 00:12:03,156 --> 00:12:05,158 Then let's tee it up. 172 00:12:05,533 --> 00:12:06,909 All right, waggle. 173 00:12:08,244 --> 00:12:09,370 Waggle. 174 00:12:10,872 --> 00:12:11,872 No, look. 175 00:12:12,040 --> 00:12:13,583 He's got her waggling now. 176 00:12:14,042 --> 00:12:15,418 Waggle the... 177 00:12:15,585 --> 00:12:17,378 ...club head, okay? 178 00:12:18,379 --> 00:12:20,715 It's a relaxing ritual we do. 179 00:12:21,549 --> 00:12:22,925 Just waggle it. 180 00:12:25,386 --> 00:12:27,597 Waggle it and let the big dog eat. 181 00:12:29,891 --> 00:12:30,933 What big dog? 182 00:12:31,225 --> 00:12:32,935 The driver, the #1-wood. 183 00:12:33,102 --> 00:12:34,896 - This is metal. - All woods are. 184 00:12:35,063 --> 00:12:36,939 The driver's known as the big dog. 185 00:12:37,106 --> 00:12:40,109 I'm just saying let him loose, let it rip... 186 00:12:40,276 --> 00:12:42,070 ...let the big dog eat. 187 00:12:54,707 --> 00:12:57,451 You know, this is without a doubt the stupidest, silliest... 188 00:12:57,551 --> 00:13:00,922 ...most idiotic, grotesquely masquerading game ever invented. 189 00:13:01,089 --> 00:13:03,424 Yes, that's why I love it. 190 00:13:03,591 --> 00:13:05,927 If you hit one good shot... 191 00:13:06,094 --> 00:13:08,805 ...and that tuning fork rings in your loins... 192 00:13:10,306 --> 00:13:11,766 ...and you can't wait... 193 00:13:11,933 --> 00:13:12,933 ...to get back. 194 00:13:13,267 --> 00:13:14,644 Try it again. 195 00:13:26,823 --> 00:13:28,991 The big dog just ate something. 196 00:13:30,785 --> 00:13:33,663 Did that tuning fork ring in your loins? 197 00:13:33,996 --> 00:13:36,332 Well, I wouldn't go that far. 198 00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:40,336 I always say quit on a good shot. 199 00:13:40,503 --> 00:13:42,505 We'll call that lesson #1? 200 00:13:43,297 --> 00:13:44,297 Okay. 201 00:13:45,007 --> 00:13:46,175 And... 202 00:13:47,135 --> 00:13:48,803 ...if you wouldn't mind... 203 00:13:48,970 --> 00:13:50,680 ...paying me in cash? 204 00:13:51,014 --> 00:13:54,976 There's a little situation I'm dealing with the IRS. 205 00:13:55,143 --> 00:13:59,522 I got to bob and weave around the facts of life, if you know what I mean. 206 00:14:00,523 --> 00:14:02,316 Can I ask you a question? 207 00:14:02,984 --> 00:14:06,362 If you're such a legendary golfer, as everyone says... 208 00:14:06,529 --> 00:14:09,490 ...then why are you, at your age, out here in the sticks... 209 00:14:09,657 --> 00:14:12,660 ...operating a barely-solvent business, ducking the IRS... 210 00:14:12,827 --> 00:14:17,040 ...collecting a few dollars for beer when you're capable of much more? 211 00:14:21,502 --> 00:14:23,880 Perhaps I'm chock-full of inner demons. 212 00:14:25,381 --> 00:14:26,381 No. 213 00:14:26,841 --> 00:14:28,718 You're chock-full of bullshit. 214 00:14:29,677 --> 00:14:30,845 Anyway... 215 00:14:31,012 --> 00:14:32,555 ...same time next week? 216 00:14:38,061 --> 00:14:41,230 What'd you mean I should try being saddled sometime? 217 00:14:43,191 --> 00:14:46,361 Were you being literal or was that some Freudian deal? 218 00:14:47,070 --> 00:14:48,237 Molly? 219 00:14:48,404 --> 00:14:49,379 Doctor? 220 00:14:49,479 --> 00:14:51,240 What kind of saddle? 221 00:15:17,100 --> 00:15:20,561 David Simms. What the hell are you doing here? 222 00:15:20,770 --> 00:15:22,355 Hey, there, Romeo. 223 00:15:22,980 --> 00:15:24,148 Been a while. 224 00:15:25,608 --> 00:15:27,068 Tin Cup around? 225 00:15:27,443 --> 00:15:30,571 No, he's in Houston on business. 226 00:15:30,780 --> 00:15:31,780 You know. 227 00:15:32,281 --> 00:15:35,243 I thought you were supposed to be out on the pro golf tour. 228 00:15:37,954 --> 00:15:42,667 You tell Tin Cup that I'm in town for my big charity Best Ball Tournament. 229 00:15:43,626 --> 00:15:45,378 I got a spot for him. 230 00:15:45,503 --> 00:15:47,588 If he ever gets back from... 231 00:15:48,464 --> 00:15:50,064 Houston. 232 00:15:50,299 --> 00:15:51,926 Yeah, wherever. 233 00:15:52,385 --> 00:15:53,594 I thought you hated him. 234 00:15:53,803 --> 00:15:56,597 Hell, I haven't even thought about him in a dozen years. 235 00:15:59,308 --> 00:16:02,270 Not since the good old days at the University of Houston... 236 00:16:02,520 --> 00:16:05,023 ...where we won all them titles together. 237 00:16:05,982 --> 00:16:07,400 God almighty. 238 00:16:07,692 --> 00:16:10,945 He says he carried you on his back all them years. 239 00:16:11,154 --> 00:16:14,532 I didn't have much craft back then, just a little... 240 00:16:14,699 --> 00:16:16,409 ...native ability. 241 00:16:17,410 --> 00:16:18,953 Now, old Roy... 242 00:16:19,328 --> 00:16:21,456 ...he's a hell of a ball-striker. 243 00:16:21,706 --> 00:16:22,790 What do you want? 244 00:16:24,709 --> 00:16:27,545 - I want to win my own tournament. - I bet you do. 245 00:16:28,004 --> 00:16:32,133 He can help me if we can behave like grown-ups together. 246 00:16:33,343 --> 00:16:34,927 You never know. 247 00:16:37,805 --> 00:16:39,223 You tell him that. 248 00:16:39,432 --> 00:16:41,059 I'll be sure to tell him. 249 00:16:42,018 --> 00:16:43,811 What's the catch? 250 00:16:46,939 --> 00:16:48,358 Hello, Cup. 251 00:16:49,359 --> 00:16:51,152 There is no catch. 252 00:16:51,569 --> 00:16:53,237 I put together a tournament... 253 00:16:53,446 --> 00:16:55,948 ...with an elite field of players... 254 00:16:56,074 --> 00:16:58,159 ...and a half-million dollar purse. 255 00:16:58,576 --> 00:17:01,746 And, by God, I'm tired of seeing the money head out of town. 256 00:17:01,954 --> 00:17:03,373 Make more birdies. 257 00:17:08,961 --> 00:17:10,880 That's where you come in. 258 00:17:11,089 --> 00:17:12,757 I need you on my team. 259 00:17:13,091 --> 00:17:15,677 Well, I repeat: What's the catch? 260 00:17:15,885 --> 00:17:19,180 We're playing Cottonwood, where you once shot a 59. 261 00:17:19,389 --> 00:17:22,517 Where you can still shoot a 65 in your sleep. 262 00:17:22,725 --> 00:17:27,271 You know every bump on the fairway and every subtle break on every green. 263 00:17:27,772 --> 00:17:29,232 Hot tub, Roy? 264 00:17:31,401 --> 00:17:32,694 It's a spa. 265 00:17:35,071 --> 00:17:37,281 You and me at Cottonwood? 266 00:17:37,782 --> 00:17:39,492 Kind of like old times. 267 00:17:43,496 --> 00:17:44,471 Yeah. 268 00:17:44,571 --> 00:17:46,999 Well, put her there, partner! 269 00:17:47,500 --> 00:17:50,920 These two homeboys will show the world what golf in Texas is about! 270 00:17:51,796 --> 00:17:54,048 I'll be a birdie-making machine! 271 00:17:55,007 --> 00:17:57,719 Whoa, whoa, wait a minute there, Roy. 272 00:17:57,927 --> 00:18:01,723 I didn't mean I wanted you to play with me. I want you to caddy. 273 00:18:01,931 --> 00:18:05,226 You know, read the greens, club me, that kind of stuff. 274 00:18:13,026 --> 00:18:14,068 Caddy? 275 00:18:14,652 --> 00:18:16,237 Come on, Roy. 276 00:18:16,446 --> 00:18:19,532 I can't bring a guy in off the street to play in my tournament. 277 00:18:21,659 --> 00:18:25,747 For chrissakes, guys, this has become a big-time event. 278 00:18:26,122 --> 00:18:29,417 Hell, I got corporate sponsors and 30 bucks a ticket. 279 00:18:29,625 --> 00:18:33,421 This guy off the street can kick your ass at golf anytime. 280 00:18:33,629 --> 00:18:35,048 Like he did in Junior Golf. 281 00:18:35,173 --> 00:18:37,133 Like he did in... No, fuck it. 282 00:18:40,553 --> 00:18:42,055 I'll give you $100. 283 00:18:42,555 --> 00:18:44,766 And 5% of any earnings. 284 00:18:45,683 --> 00:18:47,435 Get out of here! 285 00:18:47,685 --> 00:18:51,356 Take your pinche color coordinated sponsored chingada and... 286 00:18:51,564 --> 00:18:54,609 ...and take a flying fuck on the... No, I got it. 287 00:18:58,154 --> 00:18:59,781 I was just offering work. 288 00:18:59,989 --> 00:19:01,115 Thank you very much. 289 00:19:06,371 --> 00:19:07,872 I'll take the job. 290 00:19:08,831 --> 00:19:11,084 Yeah, we'll take the job. 291 00:19:41,823 --> 00:19:44,492 It might be more than you got in your bag. 292 00:19:44,659 --> 00:19:46,119 I could make that. 293 00:19:49,497 --> 00:19:50,497 Shit. 294 00:19:53,668 --> 00:19:54,711 Is he on? 295 00:19:55,378 --> 00:19:56,546 He's on. 296 00:19:56,838 --> 00:19:58,840 Pretty good shape too. 297 00:19:59,590 --> 00:20:02,844 Tin Cup can do it. I seen him do it lots of times. 298 00:20:03,553 --> 00:20:06,055 You have extra-large huevos. 299 00:20:22,905 --> 00:20:24,073 Son-of-a-bitch. 300 00:20:24,240 --> 00:20:25,908 I told you. 301 00:20:26,075 --> 00:20:30,371 I had to. Your caddy said he'd get on the green from here. 302 00:20:32,415 --> 00:20:33,708 I could. 303 00:20:38,880 --> 00:20:41,090 I got to hand it to you, Roy. 304 00:20:41,424 --> 00:20:45,386 For 15 holes, you seemed to grasp the concept here. 305 00:20:45,553 --> 00:20:49,223 I'm trying to win this tournament and your job is to help me. 306 00:20:52,393 --> 00:20:53,393 7-iron. 307 00:20:53,561 --> 00:20:54,896 I'm going to lay up. 308 00:20:58,566 --> 00:21:00,943 You can make that shot. Hell, I can. 309 00:21:01,110 --> 00:21:02,110 Easy. 310 00:21:03,571 --> 00:21:08,076 I know I can make this damn shot, but the smart play is to lay up. 311 00:21:09,243 --> 00:21:13,581 These people didn't pay 30 bucks to see a tour star lay up on a short par 5. 312 00:21:13,790 --> 00:21:16,584 I'm sitting on a 2-shot lead with 3 to go. 313 00:21:16,793 --> 00:21:19,253 Thanks to you, my partner's in his pocket. 314 00:21:19,462 --> 00:21:20,838 Suddenly, par's a hell of a number to me. 315 00:21:21,381 --> 00:21:23,800 13 years on the tour, you're still a pussy. 316 00:21:23,966 --> 00:21:28,221 Goddamn it, David, just hit the fucking 3! Hit it! 317 00:21:28,805 --> 00:21:31,015 13 years in the driving range. 318 00:21:31,224 --> 00:21:34,519 You still think this game is about your testosterone count. 319 00:21:35,019 --> 00:21:36,229 Back up. 320 00:21:39,732 --> 00:21:42,026 230 to carry, and the tour stars... 321 00:21:42,235 --> 00:21:43,528 ...lay it up. 322 00:21:54,747 --> 00:21:56,457 Simms, from the rough. 323 00:21:56,666 --> 00:21:58,042 That's a smart play. 324 00:22:05,675 --> 00:22:07,468 You in a hurry, or what? 325 00:22:07,677 --> 00:22:08,571 Why? 326 00:22:08,671 --> 00:22:11,639 I bet Mickelson and McCord your caddy can knock it on from here. 327 00:22:13,391 --> 00:22:16,394 Come on, guys, we're trying to win a tournament here. 328 00:22:16,561 --> 00:22:19,522 We are. But I got 5-1. I think they're good odds. 329 00:22:19,689 --> 00:22:20,773 He can do it. 330 00:22:21,024 --> 00:22:23,317 Let him hit it, it's only an exhibition. 331 00:22:23,526 --> 00:22:24,526 Come on. 332 00:22:24,777 --> 00:22:26,404 You can do it. I got a ball. 333 00:22:26,696 --> 00:22:27,696 Right here. 334 00:22:28,031 --> 00:22:29,073 Come on. 335 00:22:29,282 --> 00:22:31,409 Balls versus brains. 336 00:22:32,201 --> 00:22:34,078 You hit that shot, keep walking. 337 00:22:34,287 --> 00:22:35,997 'Cause your ass is fired. 338 00:22:44,088 --> 00:22:46,549 How'll you do that in front of everyone? 339 00:22:47,091 --> 00:22:49,302 Especially when I knock it on the green. 340 00:22:49,427 --> 00:22:52,096 It looks like the caddy wants to hit the shot. 341 00:22:52,805 --> 00:22:54,349 What's going on down there? 342 00:22:54,724 --> 00:22:55,850 Boys... 343 00:22:56,059 --> 00:22:58,311 ...things have officially changed here. 344 00:22:58,436 --> 00:23:01,189 Forget the 2-shot lead. Forget the 3 holes to go. 345 00:23:01,397 --> 00:23:03,191 You need a glove. 346 00:23:03,900 --> 00:23:05,026 It'll help. 347 00:23:05,234 --> 00:23:06,861 Some side action. 348 00:23:07,070 --> 00:23:11,449 And the $250,000 purse has just gotten a little bigger. 349 00:23:12,408 --> 00:23:15,119 You don't think this guy can pull this shot off? 350 00:23:15,328 --> 00:23:18,122 I'll tell you, I don't think there's any chance. 351 00:23:18,331 --> 00:23:21,042 This impending disaster's a driving range pro. 352 00:23:21,250 --> 00:23:24,379 His name is Roy McAvoy and he's called Tin Cup. 353 00:23:24,587 --> 00:23:28,383 I'm told he was a pretty good college player, then went on mini-tours. 354 00:23:28,841 --> 00:23:31,552 He'll have to have been a great college player to pull this off. 355 00:23:31,761 --> 00:23:34,847 He's got 240 yards, he's a got a television audience. 356 00:23:34,972 --> 00:23:37,350 And he hasn't hit a golf ball yet. 357 00:23:37,475 --> 00:23:39,435 We don't see this everyday. 358 00:23:39,602 --> 00:23:42,230 National television, no warm-up. 359 00:23:42,438 --> 00:23:44,065 I don't know who this guy is. 360 00:23:44,273 --> 00:23:48,736 If he gets it out of there, I'd be surprised. A pro I'd give 10-1. 361 00:23:48,945 --> 00:23:50,405 Dollar bills. 362 00:23:54,158 --> 00:23:55,743 He's not that good! 363 00:23:57,161 --> 00:23:59,372 Do you believe this? 364 00:24:02,875 --> 00:24:04,502 What a caddy! 365 00:24:04,669 --> 00:24:07,004 - Great shot. - Thanks for the glove. 366 00:24:09,382 --> 00:24:10,245 You. 367 00:24:10,345 --> 00:24:12,427 Yeah, you, come here. Come here. 368 00:24:13,636 --> 00:24:14,636 Can you carry that? 369 00:24:15,304 --> 00:24:16,389 Pick it up. 370 00:24:20,393 --> 00:24:21,519 Nice shot. 371 00:24:21,686 --> 00:24:23,521 Come here a second. 372 00:24:24,397 --> 00:24:26,691 Take a hike. The loop's over. 373 00:24:26,899 --> 00:24:27,899 What? 374 00:24:28,317 --> 00:24:29,944 You can't fire me. 375 00:24:32,155 --> 00:24:33,406 How can you? 376 00:24:33,531 --> 00:24:36,284 Hey, I just knocked it stiff from 250. 377 00:24:36,826 --> 00:24:38,453 He's always been a jerk. 378 00:24:38,828 --> 00:24:40,121 What about my money? 379 00:24:40,329 --> 00:24:42,957 You hit the shot that took you out of the money. 380 00:24:43,166 --> 00:24:45,043 Welcome to life on the tour. 381 00:24:47,003 --> 00:24:49,797 The Sports Machine brings you a bizarre incident... 382 00:24:50,006 --> 00:24:53,134 ...at the charity golf event with tour star David Simms. 383 00:24:53,426 --> 00:24:54,969 Let's go to west Texas... 384 00:24:55,178 --> 00:24:57,722 ...where driving range pro "Tin Cup" McAvoy... 385 00:24:57,930 --> 00:25:01,059 ...serving as a caddy to David Simms at the celebrity event... 386 00:25:01,225 --> 00:25:03,978 ...grabbed the 3-wood out of his own bag... 387 00:25:04,187 --> 00:25:08,149 ...and drilled a 240-yard shot over water to the 16th green... 388 00:25:08,441 --> 00:25:10,234 If I had to do it over... 389 00:25:11,235 --> 00:25:13,071 ...I'd still hit that shot. 390 00:25:13,529 --> 00:25:14,822 I know. 391 00:25:15,740 --> 00:25:19,035 You'd bury yourself alive to prove you could handle a shovel. 392 00:25:19,243 --> 00:25:21,496 You know why? 393 00:25:23,081 --> 00:25:25,541 It's the only way you could beat Dave Simms. 394 00:25:25,708 --> 00:25:26,708 No. 395 00:25:27,085 --> 00:25:29,253 'Cause you get that look on your face. 396 00:25:29,462 --> 00:25:31,964 Because that shot was a defining moment. 397 00:25:32,090 --> 00:25:35,760 When a defining moment comes along, you define the moment... 398 00:25:35,968 --> 00:25:37,970 ...or the moment defines you. 399 00:25:38,471 --> 00:25:41,391 I did not shrink from the challenge, I rose to it. 400 00:25:41,557 --> 00:25:45,687 1981, Fort Washington Golf Club, Fresno, California, ring a bell? 401 00:25:46,270 --> 00:25:48,606 The final tour-qualifying round? 402 00:25:48,773 --> 00:25:50,775 I was playing to win. 403 00:25:51,609 --> 00:25:55,279 Tried to hit the same impossible cut 3-wood into the wind. 404 00:25:55,613 --> 00:25:58,700 - I was playing to win. - 5 in a row, out of bounds. 405 00:25:58,908 --> 00:26:00,535 You finally pulled it off... 406 00:26:00,743 --> 00:26:03,538 ...and tapped it in for a crowd-pleasing 13. 407 00:26:03,996 --> 00:26:06,207 A 12 would have got you on the tour. 408 00:26:06,416 --> 00:26:07,542 Now that... 409 00:26:07,750 --> 00:26:09,377 ...was a defining moment. 410 00:26:09,627 --> 00:26:12,088 And the definition was "shit". 411 00:26:12,755 --> 00:26:15,299 Greatness courts failure, Romeo. 412 00:26:15,800 --> 00:26:18,136 You may be right, but you know what? 413 00:26:18,928 --> 00:26:21,389 Sometimes power is good enough to win. 414 00:26:29,564 --> 00:26:31,065 We owe her $12,000. 415 00:26:31,274 --> 00:26:33,151 No, I owe her $12,000. 416 00:26:33,317 --> 00:26:36,154 Fine, you owe her $12,000. Like it makes a difference. 417 00:26:36,320 --> 00:26:37,530 It does. 418 00:26:37,655 --> 00:26:39,323 I only got one rule: 419 00:26:39,532 --> 00:26:42,452 Never bet money you don't have on a dog race... 420 00:26:42,618 --> 00:26:45,955 ...with an ex-girlfriend who is also a stripper. You broke that rule. 421 00:26:46,122 --> 00:26:49,625 You need tell her something nice to start off with. 422 00:26:49,834 --> 00:26:51,836 An ice-breaker. That's not hard. 423 00:26:52,045 --> 00:26:55,340 I'll say something. If it don't come out right, you say it better. 424 00:26:55,548 --> 00:26:57,258 Doreen's looking for you. 425 00:26:57,467 --> 00:26:58,593 I'll bet. 426 00:27:05,183 --> 00:27:06,267 Tin Cup. 427 00:27:06,476 --> 00:27:08,603 Haven't seen you in 3 days. 428 00:27:08,811 --> 00:27:09,811 Been busy. 429 00:27:11,189 --> 00:27:12,190 Hi, sweetie. 430 00:27:12,357 --> 00:27:13,358 Hi, honey. 431 00:27:20,198 --> 00:27:22,158 That better be you, Roy. 432 00:27:22,325 --> 00:27:24,118 Just be nice. 433 00:27:29,332 --> 00:27:30,458 Doreen... 434 00:27:31,584 --> 00:27:34,796 ...you're looking particularly lovely tonight. 435 00:27:35,088 --> 00:27:37,382 It's nicer than the leopard suit. 436 00:27:37,590 --> 00:27:38,800 Cut the shit. 437 00:27:39,217 --> 00:27:41,094 You owe me $12,000. 438 00:27:41,219 --> 00:27:43,596 We're going to pay it, don't worry. 439 00:27:43,721 --> 00:27:45,306 I know you'll pay me. 440 00:27:45,515 --> 00:27:48,142 12 smackeroos. Where is it? 441 00:27:50,395 --> 00:27:52,480 - There. - What is this? 442 00:27:53,231 --> 00:27:55,483 With equity and inventory it's worth... 443 00:27:56,109 --> 00:27:58,152 ...12 grand, more or less. 444 00:27:58,361 --> 00:28:01,239 This is how you think you'll settle up? 445 00:28:01,406 --> 00:28:03,616 By giving me the driving range? 446 00:28:03,741 --> 00:28:08,246 Only on condition you don't sell right away, and we keep our jobs. 447 00:28:08,413 --> 00:28:12,166 What in the world would I want with your stupid driving range? 448 00:28:12,417 --> 00:28:13,626 Equity. 449 00:28:13,751 --> 00:28:14,752 Inventory. 450 00:28:14,919 --> 00:28:15,920 Cash flow. 451 00:28:16,129 --> 00:28:18,840 Plus an enhanced stature in the community... 452 00:28:19,048 --> 00:28:23,136 ...and a pre-paid membership in Salome Chamber of Commerce. 453 00:28:23,928 --> 00:28:25,430 What are your labor costs? 454 00:28:26,222 --> 00:28:28,141 Everybody gets what they get. 455 00:28:31,269 --> 00:28:33,271 The tractor kid gets four. 456 00:28:34,063 --> 00:28:36,274 The tractor kid gets 5 bucks an hour. 457 00:28:37,442 --> 00:28:39,527 Give me, like, 6. 458 00:28:40,945 --> 00:28:43,156 And Romeo gets 10. Cash. 459 00:28:43,281 --> 00:28:44,741 What do you get? 460 00:28:46,284 --> 00:28:47,284 Me? 461 00:28:47,660 --> 00:28:50,288 To stand around and hit golf balls... 462 00:28:50,455 --> 00:28:53,541 ...when you're not breaking for beers or to gather the guys up... 463 00:28:53,750 --> 00:28:56,044 ...to bet on which crow'll fly off first. 464 00:28:57,170 --> 00:28:59,172 You mean my managerial salary? 465 00:28:59,297 --> 00:29:03,760 I'm referring to every nickel you take from the till, every bag of nuts. 466 00:29:03,926 --> 00:29:06,179 That is what I'm referring to. 467 00:29:06,304 --> 00:29:08,306 He'll take the deal. 468 00:29:09,766 --> 00:29:11,184 What is the deal? 469 00:29:11,684 --> 00:29:15,396 Let's just say the driving range is worth $10,000. 470 00:29:15,605 --> 00:29:17,565 You still owe me 2. 471 00:29:53,643 --> 00:29:55,269 She's been here a while. 472 00:29:56,979 --> 00:29:57,979 Am I early? 473 00:29:58,439 --> 00:30:03,152 Mr. McAvoy, I can appreciate that you have a fairly laid-back lifestyle... 474 00:30:03,319 --> 00:30:04,946 ...but I have hours to keep. 475 00:30:05,113 --> 00:30:08,825 All right. A former paramour once ascribed my... 476 00:30:08,991 --> 00:30:12,995 ...fluid sense of time to being born under the sign of Pisces. 477 00:30:13,162 --> 00:30:16,332 Something about floating through the universe. 478 00:30:16,499 --> 00:30:18,668 Oh, you amuse me, Roy. 479 00:30:19,001 --> 00:30:23,631 But I'm the only woman born after World War II who thinks astrology's bullshit. 480 00:30:23,798 --> 00:30:25,842 Let's see if the big dog'll eat. 481 00:30:26,175 --> 00:30:27,301 Waggle. 482 00:30:28,636 --> 00:30:29,590 I'm waggling. 483 00:30:29,690 --> 00:30:30,847 Set up to the ball. 484 00:30:31,639 --> 00:30:32,639 I am. 485 00:30:36,436 --> 00:30:38,938 You're trying to wring the club's neck. 486 00:30:39,480 --> 00:30:40,857 Show a little warmth. 487 00:30:41,149 --> 00:30:42,859 A little compassion. 488 00:30:43,526 --> 00:30:45,653 Remember this game's about trust... 489 00:30:45,820 --> 00:30:46,863 ...and touch... 490 00:30:47,655 --> 00:30:49,115 ...and letting go. 491 00:30:49,323 --> 00:30:52,535 So while I subtly enhance your technical prospects... 492 00:30:54,162 --> 00:30:57,206 ...why don't you tell me about your personal life. 493 00:30:57,373 --> 00:30:59,042 That's none of your business. 494 00:31:00,668 --> 00:31:02,378 Your boyfriend's a golfer. 495 00:31:02,545 --> 00:31:03,546 That's my bet. 496 00:31:03,713 --> 00:31:06,007 He's the reason you're learning. 497 00:31:06,507 --> 00:31:08,167 Hell, I probably even know him. 498 00:31:08,267 --> 00:31:09,802 Get your hands off her. 499 00:31:13,056 --> 00:31:14,223 Hi, honey. 500 00:31:15,016 --> 00:31:16,267 Hi, darling. 501 00:31:16,726 --> 00:31:19,937 He's taking her to Miami for the fucking Doral! 502 00:31:20,313 --> 00:31:22,231 I can't compete with that! 503 00:31:22,398 --> 00:31:24,359 You are having a bad week. 504 00:31:24,567 --> 00:31:26,611 She must think I'm a nothing. 505 00:31:26,819 --> 00:31:31,366 Such a loser, a lousy driving range pro, living in a Winnebago. 506 00:31:31,574 --> 00:31:33,326 She doesn't know you live here. 507 00:31:33,451 --> 00:31:36,079 She knows I'm not taking her to no Doral... 508 00:31:36,245 --> 00:31:39,207 ...for massages and mimosas all weekend. 509 00:31:40,958 --> 00:31:43,961 - I didn't leave it out. - Well, I didn't. 510 00:31:46,130 --> 00:31:48,132 I must do something with my life. 511 00:31:48,341 --> 00:31:50,259 You just threw that in the spa. 512 00:31:50,426 --> 00:31:53,471 Must rise to a level worthy of the women who think I'm a joke. 513 00:31:53,638 --> 00:31:56,599 You could go out and win the U.S. Open. That'd impress her. 514 00:31:56,974 --> 00:31:57,974 What? 515 00:31:58,267 --> 00:31:59,267 Win the Open. 516 00:31:59,769 --> 00:32:02,063 She'll think, "You're wonderful, Roy." 517 00:32:03,981 --> 00:32:06,150 Romeo, that idea has promise. 518 00:32:06,359 --> 00:32:10,488 The U.S. Open? The biggest golf tournament in the world? 519 00:32:10,655 --> 00:32:12,615 Not just the biggest... 520 00:32:12,949 --> 00:32:15,910 ...the most democratic golf tournament in the world. 521 00:32:16,119 --> 00:32:17,995 - What do you mean? - It's open. 522 00:32:18,371 --> 00:32:19,371 So? 523 00:32:19,664 --> 00:32:22,625 Anyone with a 2 handicap or better's got a shot at it. 524 00:32:22,792 --> 00:32:25,920 You just must get through a local and sectional qualifier, then like... 525 00:32:26,129 --> 00:32:29,424 ...Doral or Colonial or AT&T, they can't keep you out. 526 00:32:29,882 --> 00:32:33,594 They can't ask you if you're a garbage man or a... 527 00:32:33,803 --> 00:32:36,514 ...driving range pro whose checks are signed by a stripper. 528 00:32:37,015 --> 00:32:38,975 You qualify, you're in. 529 00:32:39,142 --> 00:32:40,435 You don't got the game. 530 00:32:40,643 --> 00:32:42,270 I got every shot in the book. 531 00:32:42,478 --> 00:32:44,272 I'm talking about the game. 532 00:32:44,480 --> 00:32:47,191 The mental game. La cabeza, you don't got it. 533 00:32:47,650 --> 00:32:51,529 Since you're the authority, teach me what I ain't... 534 00:32:51,904 --> 00:32:53,406 ...and never will be. 535 00:32:53,531 --> 00:32:56,034 What for? You never listen to me. 536 00:32:56,701 --> 00:32:58,536 This time'll be different. 537 00:32:58,703 --> 00:32:59,954 - Right. - I promise. 538 00:33:00,163 --> 00:33:04,292 You don't have the money to get your golf clubs out of hock. 539 00:33:04,667 --> 00:33:05,793 That don't fit. 540 00:33:06,419 --> 00:33:08,212 Don't force it if it don't... 541 00:33:09,839 --> 00:33:12,050 Is that what those things were? 542 00:33:12,216 --> 00:33:13,426 Flowers. 543 00:33:14,510 --> 00:33:18,639 You're going to play me for $400 with those? 544 00:33:19,015 --> 00:33:21,809 And I'll give you two strokes a side. 545 00:33:22,226 --> 00:33:24,312 You ain't got no 400 bucks. 546 00:33:24,520 --> 00:33:26,064 My car title's collateral. 547 00:33:27,065 --> 00:33:29,942 I ain't interested in that piece of shit. 548 00:33:31,027 --> 00:33:33,946 That's 'cause you think of it as transportation. 549 00:33:34,072 --> 00:33:35,948 Think of it as bragging rights. 550 00:33:36,199 --> 00:33:40,745 Think of sitting around the bar crowing about the Cadillac you won from me. 551 00:33:42,038 --> 00:33:45,083 They'll forget all about the Winnebago you lost to me. 552 00:33:49,003 --> 00:33:51,214 I'll call the INS on you, you midget. 553 00:33:51,381 --> 00:33:54,217 I'll be playing a pink lady today. 554 00:33:54,509 --> 00:33:57,345 That little pink fag ball supposed to intimidate me? 555 00:33:58,179 --> 00:34:00,640 Not unless I knock it by you. 556 00:34:01,015 --> 00:34:02,558 Louisville Slugger, please. 557 00:34:11,359 --> 00:34:12,359 I believe you're away. 558 00:34:12,527 --> 00:34:14,237 Don't worry about it. 559 00:34:14,487 --> 00:34:16,989 I thought I caught it on the toe. 560 00:34:21,077 --> 00:34:24,080 You drive for show and you putt for dough, big mouth. 561 00:34:24,247 --> 00:34:27,083 Did you hear that? Boone was being profound. 562 00:34:27,250 --> 00:34:29,752 Stay out of the rough. I recommend... 563 00:34:30,086 --> 00:34:31,379 ...the shovel. 564 00:34:31,546 --> 00:34:32,880 That's what I think. 565 00:34:39,429 --> 00:34:41,264 I want a legitimate swing. 566 00:34:41,431 --> 00:34:42,765 No scooping. 567 00:34:48,396 --> 00:34:49,772 I'll finish. 568 00:34:54,736 --> 00:34:56,612 Get the hell off my course. 569 00:34:56,946 --> 00:34:58,573 Need a receipt? 570 00:35:00,575 --> 00:35:03,411 You know what I think? She's got you by the huevos. 571 00:35:03,578 --> 00:35:08,291 Your job is to teach me patience and humility. Don't advise me on love-life. 572 00:35:08,458 --> 00:35:10,585 Not all my thinking occurs below the belt. 573 00:35:10,835 --> 00:35:14,297 I stand for a few things besides my next romantic interlude. 574 00:35:14,464 --> 00:35:18,968 You'll have no trouble telling her you can't teach her until after the Open. 575 00:35:19,135 --> 00:35:22,472 That'd make an issue out of something that's not an issue. 576 00:35:22,805 --> 00:35:24,098 Besides, I'm focused. 577 00:35:24,265 --> 00:35:25,265 I am! 578 00:35:25,433 --> 00:35:26,809 This is my quest! 579 00:35:26,976 --> 00:35:30,104 This is my stand for the guys who've had their... 580 00:35:30,271 --> 00:35:33,232 ...fill of soulless robots like David Simms. 581 00:35:33,816 --> 00:35:35,818 He may be a soulless robot... 582 00:35:35,985 --> 00:35:40,490 ...but he's a rich, happy soulless robot with a beautiful doctor-lady girlfriend. 583 00:35:40,656 --> 00:35:43,993 How'll getting into the Open change her opinion of you? 584 00:35:44,660 --> 00:35:47,497 It'll show her I'm not who she thinks I am. 585 00:35:47,663 --> 00:35:50,124 You are who she thinks you are, man! 586 00:35:50,291 --> 00:35:54,128 No, I will not give you time off to go win the Open. 587 00:35:54,295 --> 00:35:55,963 I don't care if it's your quest. 588 00:35:56,130 --> 00:35:57,674 How about my destiny? 589 00:35:57,840 --> 00:36:01,511 Or your destiny. Or any other term you remember from Cliff Notes. 590 00:36:01,678 --> 00:36:03,638 That looks stupid. 591 00:36:03,805 --> 00:36:05,348 You get mean, then petty. 592 00:36:05,515 --> 00:36:09,477 If you had been just a little nicer to me when we were an item... 593 00:36:09,644 --> 00:36:12,355 ...then maybe I wouldn't be such a nasty boss. 594 00:36:12,522 --> 00:36:15,149 I have a business to run. Bye-bye. 595 00:36:15,316 --> 00:36:18,194 Becky, come here, sweetheart. Right now, hurry up. 596 00:36:18,361 --> 00:36:22,490 Your natural thing is really sweet, but we don't do natural here. 597 00:36:22,657 --> 00:36:26,035 We do big and bold, colorful hair, lots of it. Look at me. 598 00:36:26,202 --> 00:36:27,829 That's what we do. 599 00:36:31,332 --> 00:36:34,669 If you're going to take that tone then we'll talk later. 600 00:36:34,836 --> 00:36:39,549 I'm sorry, I have things to do. I don't need to be treated like that. 601 00:36:39,716 --> 00:36:41,551 So, good-bye. 602 00:36:43,386 --> 00:36:47,015 It wouldn't kill you just once to tell her she's beautiful... 603 00:36:47,181 --> 00:36:49,058 ...or that she can dance... 604 00:36:49,225 --> 00:36:50,393 ...or she's sexy. 605 00:36:50,560 --> 00:36:54,063 Here I am, ready to charge forth in pursuit of my destiny... 606 00:36:54,230 --> 00:36:56,733 ...and I can't get time off work to do it. 607 00:36:57,859 --> 00:37:01,070 I'm no expert here, but it seems to me that... 608 00:37:01,237 --> 00:37:03,740 ...the pursuit of destiny isn't something... 609 00:37:03,906 --> 00:37:06,701 ...you need to get off a $7 per hour job to do. 610 00:37:06,868 --> 00:37:08,911 I'm stuck, man. I'm buried. 611 00:37:09,078 --> 00:37:10,371 I need help. 612 00:37:10,538 --> 00:37:13,207 I need advice. I need counseling. 613 00:37:14,584 --> 00:37:15,752 I need a shrink. 614 00:37:16,044 --> 00:37:17,754 You don't know no shrinks. 615 00:37:18,546 --> 00:37:19,881 I know one. 616 00:37:21,549 --> 00:37:23,926 No, no, no, not the doctor-lady. 617 00:37:24,218 --> 00:37:25,386 Why not? 618 00:37:25,511 --> 00:37:29,515 You can't ask her advice about the woman you're trying to hose. 619 00:37:30,058 --> 00:37:31,267 Why not? 620 00:38:49,804 --> 00:38:51,180 I didn't say shit! 621 00:38:54,517 --> 00:38:56,853 Get in the other room, please. 622 00:38:58,813 --> 00:39:01,524 Sue Ann, honey, it's okay. Okay. 623 00:39:01,691 --> 00:39:04,360 You're going to be fine. Take a deep breath. 624 00:39:06,654 --> 00:39:08,614 She was crying when she came out. 625 00:39:08,823 --> 00:39:10,491 So maybe it's something you said... 626 00:39:10,658 --> 00:39:12,618 That's the patient exit room. 627 00:39:12,827 --> 00:39:17,040 I knew it was some kind of room. There were no magazines. 628 00:39:17,206 --> 00:39:19,208 Why are you here? 629 00:39:20,710 --> 00:39:22,211 Therapy. 630 00:39:23,671 --> 00:39:26,049 You've come for therapy? Okay, look. 631 00:39:26,215 --> 00:39:30,511 You need to make an appointment because I have a client in half an hour. 632 00:39:30,678 --> 00:39:32,847 That's fine, I'm not that fucked up. 633 00:39:33,348 --> 00:39:36,559 Why don't you just have a seat right there. 634 00:39:36,726 --> 00:39:38,227 Right over there. 635 00:39:56,204 --> 00:39:58,081 So how do I do it? 636 00:39:59,082 --> 00:40:02,710 Therapy, I mean. How do I start doing it? 637 00:40:04,754 --> 00:40:08,591 In your parlance, "Kick back and let the big dog eat." 638 00:40:14,722 --> 00:40:18,768 Suppose there's a guy and he's standing on the shore of a river... 639 00:40:19,560 --> 00:40:24,440 ...and river's full of piranhas, alligators, eddies, shit like that. 640 00:40:24,607 --> 00:40:27,568 And nobody'll even go down there to dip a toe. 641 00:40:27,735 --> 00:40:32,615 And on the other side of the river's a million bucks, on this side a boat. 642 00:40:34,951 --> 00:40:36,786 I guess my question is... 643 00:40:36,953 --> 00:40:40,581 ...what would possess a guy to swim for it? 644 00:40:40,748 --> 00:40:42,083 He's an idiot. 645 00:40:42,250 --> 00:40:44,293 No, see, he's a hell of a swimmer. 646 00:40:44,460 --> 00:40:48,589 His problem is more like why does he always have to... 647 00:40:48,756 --> 00:40:50,299 ...rise to the challenge? 648 00:40:50,466 --> 00:40:52,126 He's a juvenile idiot. 649 00:40:52,226 --> 00:40:54,137 You don't understand. 650 00:40:54,846 --> 00:40:57,974 We're talking about you and your inner demons. 651 00:40:58,599 --> 00:41:00,885 That human frailty you blather about. 652 00:41:00,985 --> 00:41:03,938 Not some mytho-poetic metaphor you come up with... 653 00:41:04,313 --> 00:41:07,108 ...in a feeble and transparent effort to do yourself credit. 654 00:41:07,650 --> 00:41:09,777 You're going to make me feel lousy? 655 00:41:10,236 --> 00:41:12,780 I want to feel better. What kind of therapy is this? 656 00:41:13,156 --> 00:41:17,035 You don't have any inner demons. You have inner crapola. 657 00:41:17,702 --> 00:41:19,195 Inner debris, garbage... 658 00:41:19,295 --> 00:41:21,781 ...horseshit in staggering amounts. 659 00:41:21,881 --> 00:41:24,792 I'm not some just jerk driving range pro... 660 00:41:24,959 --> 00:41:28,796 ...who drinks too much booze, eats too few vegetables, okay? 661 00:41:29,213 --> 00:41:30,423 Sit down. 662 00:41:30,548 --> 00:41:35,219 You're getting defensive, and I want you to just tell me why you're here. 663 00:41:37,221 --> 00:41:38,431 A woman. 664 00:41:39,223 --> 00:41:40,433 A woman. 665 00:41:41,225 --> 00:41:42,977 Have you asked her out? 666 00:41:43,436 --> 00:41:45,646 Nah, she's seeing a guy. 667 00:41:45,855 --> 00:41:48,787 But he's a real horse's ass, if you ask me. 668 00:41:48,887 --> 00:41:51,944 Maybe if you shared your heart with this woman at dinner... 669 00:41:52,070 --> 00:41:54,447 ...these issues would be in the open. 670 00:41:55,740 --> 00:41:57,075 I'm afraid she'll say no. 671 00:41:57,241 --> 00:42:01,996 So, your speeches about swimming across shark-infested waters... 672 00:42:02,205 --> 00:42:05,083 ...are about your golf game and not about your personal life? 673 00:42:07,085 --> 00:42:08,060 Good, then... 674 00:42:08,160 --> 00:42:10,505 I didn't know we'd get into my personal life. 675 00:42:10,713 --> 00:42:12,256 This is therapy, Roy. 676 00:42:12,465 --> 00:42:13,508 I know, but... 677 00:42:13,716 --> 00:42:15,677 ...I didn't know it was that kind. 678 00:42:15,885 --> 00:42:19,347 Let's make this simple. Please, sit down right here. 679 00:42:19,972 --> 00:42:24,852 Those risks you love to take on the golf course you talk so poetically about. 680 00:42:25,395 --> 00:42:29,774 You need to apply those risks to your personal life as passionately. 681 00:42:30,066 --> 00:42:32,026 I should just ask her out? 682 00:42:32,276 --> 00:42:35,738 And risk coming right over the top, hooking it out of bounds? 683 00:42:35,905 --> 00:42:37,198 Absolutely, Roy. 684 00:42:37,407 --> 00:42:39,534 - That's good. - No, I'm sorry. 685 00:42:39,742 --> 00:42:40,785 Look... 686 00:42:40,993 --> 00:42:45,540 ...all you must do is walk up to this woman, look her in the eye... 687 00:42:45,748 --> 00:42:46,748 Look at me. 688 00:42:47,291 --> 00:42:50,294 Look her in the eyes, that's right. Let down your guard... 689 00:42:50,503 --> 00:42:54,716 ...and don't try to be cool, just be honest and take a risk. 690 00:42:54,924 --> 00:42:57,635 And then, whatever happens, if you act from the heart... 691 00:42:57,802 --> 00:42:59,554 ...you can't make a mistake. 692 00:43:16,821 --> 00:43:18,031 Dr. Griswold... 693 00:43:18,448 --> 00:43:19,448 Yes? 694 00:43:20,116 --> 00:43:22,035 I think I'm in love with you. 695 00:43:22,952 --> 00:43:24,487 From the moment I first saw you... 696 00:43:24,587 --> 00:43:28,416 ...I knew I was through with bar girls and strippers and... 697 00:43:28,624 --> 00:43:31,836 ...when you first started talking I was smitten with you... 698 00:43:32,045 --> 00:43:35,340 ...and I'm smitten with you more every day I think of you and... 699 00:43:35,548 --> 00:43:39,844 ...the fact you know I'm full of crapola makes you more attractive to me. 700 00:43:40,053 --> 00:43:42,597 Usually I can bullshit people, but not you. 701 00:43:42,805 --> 00:43:45,683 And in addition, you got great legs and... 702 00:43:46,142 --> 00:43:49,771 ...most women I'm thinking about how to get into their pants, with you... 703 00:43:51,689 --> 00:43:53,066 I'm just... 704 00:43:53,316 --> 00:43:55,568 ...thinking about getting into your heart. 705 00:43:57,570 --> 00:43:58,613 Stunned? 706 00:44:00,323 --> 00:44:01,267 So... 707 00:44:01,367 --> 00:44:04,735 ...so what about dinner and we can talk about us... 708 00:44:04,835 --> 00:44:05,816 ...and if we have a future... 709 00:44:05,916 --> 00:44:08,122 ...and how to drop that horse's ass boyfriend of yours. 710 00:44:09,332 --> 00:44:10,625 Slow down. 711 00:44:10,833 --> 00:44:12,627 I'm staring eagle in the face. 712 00:44:12,835 --> 00:44:16,214 Just cut the golf talk, please. Because this is a mistake. 713 00:44:16,381 --> 00:44:19,550 I'm acting from the heart, how can that be a mistake? 714 00:44:19,717 --> 00:44:20,717 Right? 715 00:44:20,843 --> 00:44:22,220 Wrong, Roy. 716 00:44:22,387 --> 00:44:24,222 I mean, shit! 717 00:44:24,389 --> 00:44:26,391 I didn't know you meant me. 718 00:44:26,599 --> 00:44:28,393 Would your advice have been different? 719 00:44:36,693 --> 00:44:40,822 This session is over. I have someone coming soon. Leave. 720 00:44:43,032 --> 00:44:44,992 I take it your answer is no. 721 00:44:45,368 --> 00:44:49,414 Our relationship is and will remain strictly professional. 722 00:44:51,124 --> 00:44:52,250 That's it? 723 00:44:58,715 --> 00:45:02,760 I'm going to qualify for the U.S. Open and kick your boyfriend's ass. 724 00:45:07,557 --> 00:45:11,019 Whatever you think of me, you should know he hates old people... 725 00:45:11,227 --> 00:45:12,687 ...children, dogs... 726 00:45:13,146 --> 00:45:16,524 ...and that broad's crying still in the exit room. 727 00:45:16,733 --> 00:45:18,526 You're still in the exit room. 728 00:45:29,162 --> 00:45:30,162 Hello?! 729 00:45:30,288 --> 00:45:32,040 Dr. Kasseldorf? 730 00:45:32,248 --> 00:45:33,374 You're there. 731 00:45:34,083 --> 00:45:38,254 You said to call if something came up that confused me... 732 00:45:38,546 --> 00:45:42,342 ...and shrinks need shrinks... But, it happened. You said it would. 733 00:45:42,925 --> 00:45:46,387 A patient thinks he's falling in love with me. 734 00:45:46,554 --> 00:45:49,515 He's not really a patient, he's my golf pro, but... 735 00:45:49,766 --> 00:45:53,895 I know that under the circumstance I should recommend another therapist. 736 00:45:54,103 --> 00:45:56,064 But there aren't any in Salome. 737 00:45:56,272 --> 00:46:00,234 He'd have to drive 100 miles to Midland or Odessa. 738 00:46:00,443 --> 00:46:03,071 I'm not sure you could count on help there. 739 00:46:03,279 --> 00:46:04,279 Me? 740 00:46:04,614 --> 00:46:07,200 No, my self-esteem is fine. 741 00:46:07,325 --> 00:46:08,826 My self-esteem is fine. 742 00:46:09,619 --> 00:46:11,746 He's a good-looking man. 743 00:46:12,121 --> 00:46:14,332 Green eyes. I don't know, I mean... 744 00:46:14,499 --> 00:46:16,209 That's not the point, is it? 745 00:46:16,334 --> 00:46:17,835 He's, you know... 746 00:46:18,002 --> 00:46:20,004 ...he's kind of cute. He's cute. 747 00:46:21,714 --> 00:46:22,714 But... 748 00:47:49,719 --> 00:47:51,512 You got a beautiful swing. 749 00:47:52,430 --> 00:47:54,182 I'm a beautiful guy. 750 00:47:54,891 --> 00:47:57,518 Look, Roy, I came to apologize, okay? 751 00:47:57,727 --> 00:47:58,727 For what? 752 00:47:58,895 --> 00:48:00,605 You did what I said... 753 00:48:00,813 --> 00:48:03,941 ...and I poured cold water over your efforts. I didn't get it. 754 00:48:04,567 --> 00:48:06,944 I'm a terrible shrink, probably. 755 00:48:07,111 --> 00:48:09,364 Should've stayed in real estate. 756 00:48:09,572 --> 00:48:13,826 Actually, I should have never left Ohio for that cowboy in Amarillo. 757 00:48:14,577 --> 00:48:16,371 Ever been to Amarillo? 758 00:48:16,621 --> 00:48:18,021 Cowboy? 759 00:48:18,331 --> 00:48:22,377 Yeah. It's not as romantic when you're actually with one, trust me. 760 00:48:22,585 --> 00:48:25,380 So, the oil man in Dallas or Houston, I don't know where he was from. 761 00:48:25,588 --> 00:48:27,340 Anyway, he looked great. 762 00:48:27,674 --> 00:48:31,928 After that, I went to the Gulf and ended up in trailer sales. 763 00:48:32,470 --> 00:48:34,555 Then condos in Corpus Christi. 764 00:48:34,931 --> 00:48:39,644 The bottom, just, boom, fell right out of the market so I needed a new gig. 765 00:48:39,977 --> 00:48:41,479 A new gig? 766 00:48:41,646 --> 00:48:43,231 Yeah, therapy. 767 00:48:43,439 --> 00:48:47,151 I took all the classes. I'm legitimate. Legal. 768 00:48:47,360 --> 00:48:50,863 Certified. Fuck! I'm certifiable. I'm really sorry. 769 00:48:50,988 --> 00:48:52,588 Oh, boy. 770 00:48:53,491 --> 00:48:55,243 Can I have a doughnut? 771 00:49:02,959 --> 00:49:03,959 Thanks. 772 00:49:06,629 --> 00:49:07,880 Okay, look... 773 00:49:08,006 --> 00:49:10,508 I am flattered you asked me out. 774 00:49:11,384 --> 00:49:13,761 I can't accept because I'm involved with David. 775 00:49:13,970 --> 00:49:17,098 I haven't seen him treat old people, children or dogs badly. 776 00:49:17,473 --> 00:49:18,891 I'm sorry. 777 00:49:19,017 --> 00:49:22,520 I got carried away with the David thing. I should have... 778 00:49:22,812 --> 00:49:26,190 I just want to make a proposal, all right? 779 00:49:27,316 --> 00:49:30,445 As long as you understand that it's strictly professional... 780 00:49:30,653 --> 00:49:32,405 ...we're not going out. 781 00:49:32,530 --> 00:49:33,531 Tee it up. 782 00:49:34,407 --> 00:49:37,618 I think I can help you with the mental aspects of the game. 783 00:49:37,827 --> 00:49:41,456 Romeo is your swing doctor, I'll be your head doctor. 784 00:49:41,706 --> 00:49:42,706 What? 785 00:49:43,166 --> 00:49:45,960 You just said yourself you're a crumby shrink. 786 00:49:46,169 --> 00:49:47,962 I can improve, Roy. 787 00:49:48,171 --> 00:49:51,132 I don't have the money to pay you! I'm broke! 788 00:49:51,341 --> 00:49:55,219 You don't need any money to pay me! We'll trade services. 789 00:49:56,012 --> 00:49:59,932 I'll give you my services for golf lessons and... 790 00:50:00,058 --> 00:50:02,643 ...I can help you through the qualifying. 791 00:50:03,853 --> 00:50:05,980 If you make it into the Open... 792 00:50:06,439 --> 00:50:09,150 I'm on my own, you'll be with David. 793 00:50:18,743 --> 00:50:20,078 I don't want this. 794 00:50:28,753 --> 00:50:32,840 Third in the group, playing out of Salome, Texas: Roy McAvoy. 795 00:51:06,249 --> 00:51:08,376 Ben Hogan, now, who's he? 796 00:51:08,584 --> 00:51:12,797 I find him mildly attractive when he's obnoxious and arrogant like this. 797 00:51:13,006 --> 00:51:14,132 Oh, good. 798 00:51:14,298 --> 00:51:15,883 That's his best side. 799 00:51:25,143 --> 00:51:26,519 They bugging you? 800 00:51:26,811 --> 00:51:30,898 Way I'm swinging today, nothing bugs me except insufficient applause. 801 00:51:32,025 --> 00:51:33,568 Give me the lumber. 802 00:51:33,776 --> 00:51:36,070 I think you want to hit the 2-iron. 803 00:51:37,113 --> 00:51:38,906 I said I want the big dog. 804 00:51:39,532 --> 00:51:41,159 You got a tight par 5 here... 805 00:51:41,325 --> 00:51:44,579 ...with out of bounds on the left. The 2-iron seems best. 806 00:51:44,829 --> 00:51:47,749 I'm not going left or right of those trees, okay? 807 00:51:47,957 --> 00:51:51,544 I'm going over those trees, with a little draw. 808 00:51:53,046 --> 00:51:55,757 That way I get home in 2. That way I'm putting for eagle. 809 00:51:56,799 --> 00:51:58,926 You don't need an eagle to qualify. 810 00:51:59,135 --> 00:52:00,845 Practice playing it safe. 811 00:52:01,054 --> 00:52:03,056 - No mistakes wins the Open. - I want the course record. 812 00:52:03,181 --> 00:52:04,349 The lumber. 813 00:52:07,977 --> 00:52:09,854 You won't listen to me, will you? 814 00:52:10,688 --> 00:52:13,274 Even when I'm trying to help you, man. 815 00:52:14,484 --> 00:52:15,693 After all these years you think I'm full of shit? 816 00:52:15,860 --> 00:52:17,945 I'll get penalized for slow play. 817 00:52:18,154 --> 00:52:19,572 Give me the driver. 818 00:52:19,697 --> 00:52:23,451 You're a head case. You always have been, always will be. 819 00:52:23,659 --> 00:52:24,786 Let's ask her. 820 00:52:24,994 --> 00:52:26,204 Dr. Griswold. 821 00:52:29,499 --> 00:52:31,584 Should I hit the big dog or the 2? 822 00:52:32,001 --> 00:52:34,962 Soliciting shot selection advice is a 2 stroke penalty. 823 00:52:36,089 --> 00:52:37,465 Trust your feelings. 824 00:52:37,674 --> 00:52:40,218 Now give me the driver and shut up. 825 00:52:43,680 --> 00:52:44,806 The driver? 826 00:52:45,014 --> 00:52:46,014 Fine. 827 00:52:46,599 --> 00:52:47,599 Here. 828 00:52:48,101 --> 00:52:50,103 Hit the driver, Tin Cup. 829 00:52:55,692 --> 00:52:58,236 I changed my mind. Give me the 3-wood. 830 00:52:59,112 --> 00:53:01,656 You can't throw that dog leg with a 3-wood. 831 00:53:01,864 --> 00:53:03,116 You want to bet? 832 00:53:05,118 --> 00:53:06,995 Fine, take the 3-wood. 833 00:53:07,203 --> 00:53:10,248 Take it and show me what a golf pro does. 834 00:53:16,212 --> 00:53:18,756 Guess I'm going with the safe shot, boys. 835 00:53:21,050 --> 00:53:23,928 But, you know, sometimes I fan that 2. 836 00:53:26,139 --> 00:53:28,182 You better give me the 3. 837 00:53:28,516 --> 00:53:30,351 Is this normal behavior? 838 00:53:30,518 --> 00:53:34,022 The word normal and him don't often collide in the same sentence. 839 00:53:36,441 --> 00:53:39,652 And sometimes I catch that 3 a little thin too. 840 00:53:40,153 --> 00:53:42,280 - Don't do this. - I've hit flies with the 4. 841 00:53:43,531 --> 00:53:45,158 Hit the damn ball. 842 00:53:45,283 --> 00:53:47,160 I've hooked my 5. 843 00:53:47,785 --> 00:53:49,287 I've shanked the 6. 844 00:53:49,454 --> 00:53:51,956 Sculled the 8. Fatted the 9. 845 00:53:52,165 --> 00:53:53,207 Chili-dipped the wedge. 846 00:53:54,083 --> 00:53:55,710 And I've bladed the sand. 847 00:53:56,753 --> 00:53:58,153 Putter? 848 00:53:58,921 --> 00:54:01,549 There is Mr. 3-Wiggle, isn't there? 849 00:54:06,471 --> 00:54:08,473 But then there's the 7-iron. 850 00:54:09,265 --> 00:54:11,684 I never miss with the 7-iron. 851 00:54:16,189 --> 00:54:18,816 It's the only truly safe club in my bag. 852 00:54:20,985 --> 00:54:23,571 The bag's lighter. You happy? 853 00:54:23,946 --> 00:54:25,698 No, I'm not happy, man. 854 00:54:26,282 --> 00:54:27,742 I'm tired! 855 00:54:29,118 --> 00:54:33,498 My life's too short to watch you blow up all... I've done it too many times. 856 00:54:34,791 --> 00:54:35,791 Quitting? 857 00:54:36,959 --> 00:54:38,559 Goddamn! 858 00:54:39,504 --> 00:54:42,006 First sign of adversity, you quit. 859 00:54:42,340 --> 00:54:46,010 God! First time you can qualify for the Open! 860 00:54:46,219 --> 00:54:47,845 What's wrong with you? 861 00:54:49,972 --> 00:54:52,600 Who wants to bet I can't par with a 7-iron? 862 00:54:56,020 --> 00:54:57,271 Anybody? 863 00:55:01,984 --> 00:55:03,444 Take the bet. 864 00:55:03,611 --> 00:55:05,738 Shut up and hit the ball! 865 00:55:28,052 --> 00:55:29,762 You the man, Cup. 866 00:56:14,098 --> 00:56:15,600 Thank you, boys. 867 00:56:21,856 --> 00:56:25,360 What do you think my best shot was? The 7-iron on 12? 868 00:56:25,568 --> 00:56:28,321 - That was a good one. - Or was it 7-iron on 14? 869 00:56:28,446 --> 00:56:29,822 That was better. 870 00:56:29,947 --> 00:56:34,452 What about that bunker shot on 18 which to my recollection was a 7-iron. 871 00:56:34,619 --> 00:56:35,953 Yes, it was! 872 00:56:36,120 --> 00:56:37,121 All good. 873 00:56:37,330 --> 00:56:38,330 You're the man. 874 00:56:38,873 --> 00:56:39,873 Hey, Doc! 875 00:56:41,959 --> 00:56:43,211 How'd I do? 876 00:56:43,711 --> 00:56:45,713 You failed miserably. 877 00:56:45,880 --> 00:56:47,548 What're you talking about? 878 00:56:47,715 --> 00:56:49,467 I qualified for the sectionals. 879 00:56:49,634 --> 00:56:50,630 You did. 880 00:56:50,730 --> 00:56:51,726 I did. 881 00:56:51,886 --> 00:56:53,054 With a 7-iron. 882 00:56:53,429 --> 00:56:54,472 Yes, siree. 883 00:56:54,639 --> 00:56:58,559 Look, your job isn't just to qualify for the Open. 884 00:56:58,726 --> 00:57:00,561 It's to prepare for the Open. 885 00:57:00,728 --> 00:57:03,147 My job is to help you prepare. 886 00:57:03,856 --> 00:57:06,567 Now, you said trust my feelings. I did. 887 00:57:07,151 --> 00:57:10,363 I didn't know you felt like breaking all your clubs... 888 00:57:10,488 --> 00:57:12,573 ...and getting in a contest with your caddy. 889 00:57:12,740 --> 00:57:13,866 Who quit. 890 00:57:13,991 --> 00:57:15,410 He always quits. 891 00:57:17,120 --> 00:57:18,120 He ought to be here. 892 00:57:18,371 --> 00:57:19,371 To the quitter. 893 00:57:20,999 --> 00:57:22,083 The little quitter. 894 00:57:22,750 --> 00:57:23,750 Nonetheless. 895 00:57:23,876 --> 00:57:25,169 Nonetheless... 896 00:57:25,878 --> 00:57:28,923 ...from the mental aspect, which is my domain... 897 00:57:29,173 --> 00:57:31,009 ...you've regressed. 898 00:57:31,509 --> 00:57:34,178 And are fumbling between delusion and denial. 899 00:57:34,387 --> 00:57:36,264 Regression, delusion, denial. 900 00:57:36,472 --> 00:57:39,267 Why must you use all the psychological language? 901 00:57:40,685 --> 00:57:42,103 Having a bad day? 902 00:57:44,022 --> 00:57:45,022 No. 903 00:57:45,148 --> 00:57:46,274 Hi, honey. 904 00:57:49,402 --> 00:57:50,403 Shot a 65. 905 00:57:52,196 --> 00:57:54,407 Parred the backside with a 7-iron. 906 00:57:55,158 --> 00:57:56,129 Why? 907 00:57:56,229 --> 00:57:59,120 Yeah, that's exactly right. That's the question, "Why?" 908 00:57:59,329 --> 00:58:01,414 Because he broke his other clubs. 909 00:58:02,206 --> 00:58:03,458 Snapped them in two. 910 00:58:04,334 --> 00:58:06,210 - Jesus. - Not all of them. 911 00:58:06,419 --> 00:58:07,962 Romeo broke two. 912 00:58:10,423 --> 00:58:12,133 I'm on your side here. 913 00:58:12,342 --> 00:58:13,968 We go way back. 914 00:58:14,177 --> 00:58:17,305 I hope you qualify for the Open. But if you do... 915 00:58:17,513 --> 00:58:19,724 ...you better play with control... 916 00:58:19,974 --> 00:58:21,976 ...or you'll get slaughtered. 917 00:58:22,143 --> 00:58:25,563 Good players shoot an 82 in the Open. 918 00:58:26,064 --> 00:58:27,565 You see... 919 00:58:27,732 --> 00:58:30,151 ...it means you just can't go for it. 920 00:58:30,568 --> 00:58:34,489 I swear to God, this guy is not who you think he is. 921 00:58:34,697 --> 00:58:36,240 It's a known fact... 922 00:58:36,449 --> 00:58:39,327 ...if a camera's not on him he treats old people and kids like dirt. 923 00:58:39,535 --> 00:58:40,535 And dogs. 924 00:58:40,828 --> 00:58:42,028 Jesus. 925 00:58:42,372 --> 00:58:44,332 Yeah, don't forget dogs. 926 00:58:44,957 --> 00:58:48,252 Okay, guys. You know what? We better go. Come on. 927 00:58:48,461 --> 00:58:49,754 I guess so. 928 00:58:51,547 --> 00:58:53,758 You ever shoot par with a 7-iron? 929 00:58:56,594 --> 00:58:58,346 Hell, Roy... 930 00:58:58,554 --> 00:59:00,765 ...it never occurred to me to try. 931 00:59:02,016 --> 00:59:05,520 I bet you $1,000 against my car that I can beat you any game. 932 00:59:07,855 --> 00:59:09,023 Any game... 933 00:59:09,190 --> 00:59:10,358 ...any golf club. 934 00:59:11,567 --> 00:59:13,986 Come on, Roy, this is ridiculous. 935 00:59:14,112 --> 00:59:15,363 Chicken? 936 00:59:21,577 --> 00:59:25,540 What, are you going to lay up the way you did in the Masters? 937 00:59:35,008 --> 00:59:36,718 Any game, I name it? 938 00:59:37,218 --> 00:59:41,139 No, it's okay. I'm just going to teach old Roy here a lesson. 939 00:59:41,514 --> 00:59:45,018 Why do men insist on measuring their dicks? 940 00:59:49,605 --> 00:59:51,399 All right, let's measure. 941 00:59:52,775 --> 00:59:56,070 Roy! For God's sakes I wasn't being literal! 942 00:59:56,529 --> 00:59:58,156 David, let's go. 943 00:59:58,322 --> 01:00:00,658 Wait. Molly, I got this one. 944 01:00:01,075 --> 01:00:05,163 We'll just call this Roy's mental preparation for the U.S. Opening. 945 01:00:05,330 --> 01:00:09,334 Where the rough is deep, the greens slick, and the nerves shattered. 946 01:00:09,834 --> 01:00:11,336 I'll take the bet. 947 01:00:16,674 --> 01:00:18,051 What's the game? 948 01:00:18,176 --> 01:00:20,178 Your 7-iron, Roy. 949 01:00:21,846 --> 01:00:23,431 One swing each. 950 01:00:23,806 --> 01:00:25,433 Whoever hits the longest. 951 01:00:26,809 --> 01:00:27,852 It's a lock. 952 01:00:28,061 --> 01:00:31,189 I hit the 7-iron like John Daly hits the 3. 953 01:00:31,356 --> 01:00:33,066 Winner, winner, chicken dinner! 954 01:00:38,488 --> 01:00:39,614 Here okay? 955 01:00:39,864 --> 01:00:40,864 Fine. 956 01:00:42,283 --> 01:00:44,786 You guys are really being childish. 957 01:00:44,952 --> 01:00:46,079 Leave it to me. 958 01:00:46,496 --> 01:00:48,122 I know what I'm doing. 959 01:00:48,665 --> 01:00:51,125 You know what? I'll see you both in the bar. 960 01:00:51,292 --> 01:00:52,292 Bye. 961 01:00:56,881 --> 01:00:58,216 Dollar bills. 962 01:01:04,222 --> 01:01:07,308 Them signs are at least 30 yards further. 963 01:01:07,475 --> 01:01:09,811 That ball must have gone 220. 964 01:01:09,977 --> 01:01:11,777 Nah, 227. 965 01:01:12,897 --> 01:01:14,607 I toed it, but it'll do! 966 01:01:14,732 --> 01:01:16,984 - That's 227. - Take your time. 967 01:01:17,151 --> 01:01:19,320 Limber up, fine with me. 968 01:01:20,905 --> 01:01:22,323 That's all right. 969 01:01:22,490 --> 01:01:23,741 I don't need to. 970 01:01:24,909 --> 01:01:26,494 Take your jacket off. 971 01:01:27,412 --> 01:01:28,621 I'm fine. 972 01:01:28,746 --> 01:01:32,417 You'll have to muscle up to get it out there, give it the old... 973 01:01:32,917 --> 01:01:34,502 ...steroid jerk! 974 01:01:42,135 --> 01:01:43,928 What the hell is he doing? 975 01:02:05,658 --> 01:02:08,369 He hit it down the fucking road, didn't he? 976 01:02:08,786 --> 01:02:10,455 It's still going. 977 01:02:20,923 --> 01:02:23,968 You the man, Roy. You the man. 978 01:02:25,053 --> 01:02:27,055 You are definitely the man. 979 01:02:28,806 --> 01:02:29,807 So long! 980 01:02:29,974 --> 01:02:32,477 And the man needs a ride home. 981 01:02:39,525 --> 01:02:41,361 I always liked that car. 982 01:02:59,379 --> 01:03:01,422 I wish Romeo were here. 983 01:03:01,589 --> 01:03:03,591 I'm not cut out for this shit. 984 01:03:03,800 --> 01:03:05,551 I'm an observer by nature. 985 01:03:05,885 --> 01:03:07,428 Earl, shut up. 986 01:03:07,595 --> 01:03:08,930 Give me the big dog. 987 01:03:09,430 --> 01:03:10,598 Big dog! 988 01:03:10,807 --> 01:03:13,059 I thought that was the big fucking dog. 989 01:03:44,841 --> 01:03:46,926 Here, let me carry that. 990 01:03:57,311 --> 01:03:59,272 - You all right? - Aw, shit. 991 01:04:00,773 --> 01:04:02,275 Give me the bag. 992 01:04:02,442 --> 01:04:03,442 No. 993 01:04:04,027 --> 01:04:05,278 All right. 994 01:04:09,324 --> 01:04:10,616 Get him. 995 01:04:18,291 --> 01:04:21,127 Like a million others you made in your life, Roy. 996 01:04:21,961 --> 01:04:23,838 Just see it going in. 997 01:04:25,048 --> 01:04:26,466 Just feel it. 998 01:04:27,467 --> 01:04:29,635 Right in the back of the jar. 999 01:04:55,328 --> 01:04:56,328 Lord 1000 01:04:58,456 --> 01:05:01,000 I can't afford to lose 1001 01:05:15,223 --> 01:05:17,183 Romes, you come back! 1002 01:05:18,685 --> 01:05:20,520 You should've been there. 1003 01:05:20,687 --> 01:05:23,356 I drained a 30-foot snake to qualify. 1004 01:05:23,523 --> 01:05:27,527 Earl gives me the straight read, thing breaks half a dozen times. 1005 01:05:28,861 --> 01:05:31,531 I missed you, pods. I missed you. 1006 01:05:33,533 --> 01:05:36,035 Okay, don't talk. You're still my guy. 1007 01:05:38,913 --> 01:05:42,375 It's a little late to be pissed off. We're in the Open. 1008 01:05:42,875 --> 01:05:44,252 You and me. 1009 01:05:46,754 --> 01:05:48,381 Fine, be like that. 1010 01:05:49,549 --> 01:05:50,883 Molly been around? 1011 01:05:51,592 --> 01:05:53,928 Neither her nor me or the god of golf... 1012 01:05:54,137 --> 01:05:56,931 ...will keep you from blowing up in the Open. 1013 01:05:57,140 --> 01:05:58,766 I made it this far. 1014 01:05:58,933 --> 01:06:03,396 Didn't I? Didn't I? All I must do is hold it together for 72 more holes. 1015 01:06:03,771 --> 01:06:07,233 There's a lot of triple-bogies waiting to grab your white ass. 1016 01:06:07,400 --> 01:06:10,111 You complaining again? Is that what I hear? 1017 01:06:10,278 --> 01:06:11,612 Shut up. 1018 01:06:12,113 --> 01:06:15,366 You're back whining, pissing, moaning. You're back. 1019 01:06:16,534 --> 01:06:17,577 You're my man. 1020 01:06:18,286 --> 01:06:21,039 What, you didn't fall in love with Earl to be your caddy. 1021 01:06:22,040 --> 01:06:24,292 He's a heart attack waiting to happen. 1022 01:06:24,459 --> 01:06:26,711 Cost me 3 strokes a side. 1023 01:06:27,128 --> 01:06:29,881 Hell, I had to carry the bag the last 4 holes. 1024 01:06:33,718 --> 01:06:34,719 Look... 1025 01:06:34,969 --> 01:06:37,055 ...I love old Earl, but... 1026 01:06:37,221 --> 01:06:38,556 ...I need you. 1027 01:06:39,974 --> 01:06:41,225 You don't love me? 1028 01:06:42,769 --> 01:06:46,481 Well, yeah, yeah, I love you too, goddamn it. 1029 01:06:46,981 --> 01:06:48,608 As much as Earl? 1030 01:06:49,275 --> 01:06:50,777 I don't know! 1031 01:06:51,110 --> 01:06:53,780 When I was with Earl, I was thinking of you. 1032 01:06:57,617 --> 01:06:59,619 Yes, as much as Earl. 1033 01:06:59,827 --> 01:07:01,287 More than Earl. 1034 01:07:02,789 --> 01:07:04,457 More than Earl. 1035 01:07:05,792 --> 01:07:07,001 Am I special? 1036 01:07:10,463 --> 01:07:12,632 If you remove the sexual overtones... 1037 01:07:12,799 --> 01:07:15,343 ...and add a golf theme, then, Romeo... 1038 01:07:15,510 --> 01:07:17,345 ...I am your Juliet. 1039 01:07:21,140 --> 01:07:22,475 In that case... 1040 01:07:22,850 --> 01:07:24,185 ...Julieta... 1041 01:07:24,936 --> 01:07:26,604 ...I am your caddy. 1042 01:07:35,822 --> 01:07:37,615 Nobody's heard from Molly? 1043 01:07:37,782 --> 01:07:39,283 You got it bad? 1044 01:07:39,701 --> 01:07:41,619 Something about that chick. 1045 01:07:47,208 --> 01:07:49,127 Little chili-dipper there. 1046 01:07:49,293 --> 01:07:52,130 Be sure to do that in the Open, it'll impress them. 1047 01:08:01,806 --> 01:08:02,974 I'm watching. 1048 01:08:03,141 --> 01:08:04,183 That ain't a chili-dipper. 1049 01:08:04,392 --> 01:08:07,979 Looks like you got el hosel. You know, the laterals. 1050 01:08:08,146 --> 01:08:09,397 The "S" word. 1051 01:08:09,564 --> 01:08:10,815 What's wrong? 1052 01:08:10,982 --> 01:08:13,735 I don't know. The shanks are like a virus. They just show up. 1053 01:08:13,901 --> 01:08:15,570 Nobody can figure them out. 1054 01:08:25,496 --> 01:08:27,248 Something's terribly wrong! 1055 01:08:27,582 --> 01:08:29,417 Something's wrong. 1056 01:08:29,584 --> 01:08:31,002 It's okay. 1057 01:08:31,336 --> 01:08:32,336 Well? 1058 01:08:32,837 --> 01:08:34,255 What's your guess? 1059 01:08:34,422 --> 01:08:36,257 It must be the woman. 1060 01:08:36,424 --> 01:08:37,675 You said a virus. 1061 01:08:37,842 --> 01:08:40,178 A woman can have the same effect. 1062 01:08:41,512 --> 01:08:43,348 What do I do? 1063 01:08:46,434 --> 01:08:48,269 Just keep swinging. 1064 01:08:48,436 --> 01:08:50,021 You'll be fine. 1065 01:08:58,863 --> 01:09:00,782 Don't say a fucking word. 1066 01:09:07,872 --> 01:09:09,707 I'll be inside if you need me. 1067 01:09:21,135 --> 01:09:22,804 Just work it out. 1068 01:09:57,005 --> 01:09:58,205 Hello? 1069 01:09:58,840 --> 01:10:00,425 Is anybody home? 1070 01:10:07,682 --> 01:10:08,682 My God! 1071 01:10:13,855 --> 01:10:16,024 Therapist laughs at the patient? 1072 01:10:16,858 --> 01:10:18,276 Is that how it works? 1073 01:10:18,776 --> 01:10:19,819 Is it? 1074 01:10:20,611 --> 01:10:24,032 A man's laid bare before God, he's the butt of the cosmic joke. 1075 01:10:24,198 --> 01:10:25,325 I'm sorry. 1076 01:10:25,533 --> 01:10:26,529 Really. 1077 01:10:26,629 --> 01:10:29,620 Some of this shit might actually work, you know. 1078 01:10:30,204 --> 01:10:32,165 There's something to this hat. 1079 01:10:32,540 --> 01:10:34,792 The golf ball pendulum thing. 1080 01:10:35,793 --> 01:10:37,045 May be onto something. 1081 01:10:37,211 --> 01:10:39,172 Oh, Jesus, Roy. 1082 01:10:39,547 --> 01:10:44,302 Quoting yourself, "It is a paraphernalia for lost and desperate souls." 1083 01:10:45,803 --> 01:10:49,307 A lost and desperate soul stands before you. 1084 01:10:50,141 --> 01:10:54,645 I assume I have the confidentiality of the doctor/client... 1085 01:10:55,063 --> 01:10:56,981 ...privilege in regard to this outfit? 1086 01:10:57,148 --> 01:10:58,191 Of course. 1087 01:10:58,483 --> 01:10:59,817 What happened? 1088 01:11:02,820 --> 01:11:04,364 I got the shanks. 1089 01:11:04,572 --> 01:11:05,990 Are you taking penicillin? 1090 01:11:06,157 --> 01:11:08,326 There's a glitch in my swing. 1091 01:11:08,493 --> 01:11:10,328 That's Romeo's department. 1092 01:11:10,495 --> 01:11:12,497 He thinks it's your department. 1093 01:11:12,997 --> 01:11:14,332 Says it's a head thing. 1094 01:11:16,084 --> 01:11:20,046 I just came over to congratulate you on the sectionals and... 1095 01:11:20,254 --> 01:11:22,215 ...to return your car. 1096 01:11:22,423 --> 01:11:24,175 David just wanted to make a point. 1097 01:11:25,176 --> 01:11:26,719 You know what? 1098 01:11:26,928 --> 01:11:31,849 I suppose we could have a therapy session right here and now. 1099 01:11:33,351 --> 01:11:35,103 I don't want therapy. 1100 01:11:36,938 --> 01:11:38,523 I want you. 1101 01:11:43,277 --> 01:11:44,737 I want you. 1102 01:11:45,947 --> 01:11:47,865 I must get some air. 1103 01:11:50,618 --> 01:11:51,744 Molly, wait. 1104 01:11:53,371 --> 01:11:54,622 Look at me. 1105 01:11:58,209 --> 01:12:01,212 Well, not at the moment, but just listen to me. 1106 01:12:05,550 --> 01:12:07,301 You're with the wrong guy. 1107 01:12:08,052 --> 01:12:09,595 I'm the right guy. 1108 01:12:12,306 --> 01:12:15,268 Everyone says my face is screwed up tight as a drum. 1109 01:12:15,476 --> 01:12:19,230 I know it's because I've been crazy about you... 1110 01:12:19,397 --> 01:12:22,233 ...from the moment you came here wearing this stupid shit. 1111 01:12:23,234 --> 01:12:27,739 The whole thing's inspired me to get here and caused me to get the shanks... 1112 01:12:27,905 --> 01:12:31,909 ...which would humiliate me in front of a billion people in a game... 1113 01:12:32,243 --> 01:12:34,245 ...I used to play pretty good. 1114 01:12:35,663 --> 01:12:37,415 Such is life. 1115 01:12:40,668 --> 01:12:44,922 So dump that phony bastard you're with and come to the Open in my corner. 1116 01:12:46,007 --> 01:12:47,007 Tell me... 1117 01:12:47,592 --> 01:12:49,844 ...you're not just at least... 1118 01:12:50,428 --> 01:12:52,263 ...moderately attracted to me. 1119 01:12:53,348 --> 01:12:55,475 You have moments, Roy. 1120 01:12:55,683 --> 01:12:59,771 You tell me which ones are my moments and I'll duplicate them. 1121 01:13:00,188 --> 01:13:01,606 This is a moment. 1122 01:13:01,773 --> 01:13:02,773 Now? 1123 01:13:03,358 --> 01:13:06,986 I mean, just utterly exposed, completely vulnerable... 1124 01:13:07,445 --> 01:13:09,197 ...inner child trying to get out. 1125 01:13:09,364 --> 01:13:11,824 Yeah? My inner child needs a spanking? 1126 01:13:21,042 --> 01:13:22,960 I don't have a car. 1127 01:13:23,378 --> 01:13:24,796 Need a ride. 1128 01:13:41,354 --> 01:13:45,358 I know a little spot along the river that's great to watch sunsets. 1129 01:13:45,566 --> 01:13:46,901 - I do. - Watch the road. 1130 01:13:47,068 --> 01:13:50,738 - I know a spot that's great for sunsets. - I bet you do. 1131 01:13:51,072 --> 01:13:52,657 Not tonight. 1132 01:13:54,158 --> 01:13:56,411 That means maybe some other night. 1133 01:13:56,577 --> 01:13:58,162 I didn't mean it like that. 1134 01:13:58,329 --> 01:14:01,666 Maybe consciously you didn't mean it that way, but unconsciously... 1135 01:14:02,500 --> 01:14:05,003 Did you mean it unconsciously? 1136 01:14:06,004 --> 01:14:09,757 Unconsciously, I don't have a clue what I'm talking about. 1137 01:14:10,591 --> 01:14:12,677 I feel we're making progress. 1138 01:14:12,844 --> 01:14:14,012 I do too. 1139 01:14:14,345 --> 01:14:18,016 I have no idea what it's progress towards, though. 1140 01:14:18,349 --> 01:14:20,852 Consciously or unconsciously? 1141 01:14:39,037 --> 01:14:42,373 It may not be much of a river to you, but to me... 1142 01:14:43,291 --> 01:14:45,752 ...the Mississippi, the Rio Grande... 1143 01:14:46,377 --> 01:14:48,129 ...the Danube... 1144 01:14:48,379 --> 01:14:49,714 ...the Amazon. 1145 01:14:49,881 --> 01:14:52,550 I don't know about the Amazon, Roy. 1146 01:14:55,720 --> 01:14:58,723 Isn't it obvious to you that you and me are... 1147 01:14:58,890 --> 01:15:00,808 ...as comfortable together as... 1148 01:15:00,975 --> 01:15:02,226 ...a couple of old shoes? 1149 01:15:03,561 --> 01:15:05,104 Old shoes? 1150 01:15:09,901 --> 01:15:12,737 Look, David's a really good person. 1151 01:15:15,823 --> 01:15:19,160 Whenever anybody says they're with a really good person... 1152 01:15:19,494 --> 01:15:22,080 ...it means they're about to leave them. 1153 01:15:22,413 --> 01:15:24,582 You're awfully judgmental. 1154 01:15:29,671 --> 01:15:32,131 It's one of my few redeeming virtues. 1155 01:15:34,175 --> 01:15:36,594 David's involved in a lot of charity work. 1156 01:15:36,761 --> 01:15:40,014 - Gets his name in the papers. - Let me just finish. 1157 01:15:40,181 --> 01:15:42,600 Many people don't see he's sensitive. 1158 01:15:42,767 --> 01:15:44,769 Well, so am I. I mean, hell... 1159 01:15:44,936 --> 01:15:48,773 Shit, I'm twice as sensitive as he is. I mean, I... 1160 01:15:49,440 --> 01:15:51,776 I brought you to the river. That's a... 1161 01:15:51,943 --> 01:15:53,444 ...nature kind of thing. 1162 01:15:54,946 --> 01:15:59,492 It is a nature kind of thing. It's a very nice river. Thank you. 1163 01:16:00,451 --> 01:16:03,955 But that's not the point. The point is David is there for me. 1164 01:16:04,122 --> 01:16:05,289 Oh, God. 1165 01:16:05,456 --> 01:16:06,874 Not the... 1166 01:16:07,041 --> 01:16:10,378 ..."He's a very good person and he's there for me" thing. 1167 01:16:10,628 --> 01:16:12,046 Let me be your shrink. 1168 01:16:12,213 --> 01:16:13,881 That's not a good idea. 1169 01:16:14,048 --> 01:16:16,634 You sound like a woman looking for a way out. 1170 01:16:20,221 --> 01:16:21,221 Warm? 1171 01:16:23,558 --> 01:16:25,143 That's enough, Roy. 1172 01:16:28,730 --> 01:16:29,856 I'm sorry. 1173 01:16:44,996 --> 01:16:46,539 We could kiss. 1174 01:16:47,165 --> 01:16:50,001 No, look, no harm, no foul just a... 1175 01:16:50,418 --> 01:16:52,879 ...little, small, innocent kind of... 1176 01:16:53,087 --> 01:16:54,213 ...kind of... 1177 01:16:55,089 --> 01:16:56,549 ...semi... 1178 01:16:57,258 --> 01:16:58,593 ...platonic... 1179 01:17:02,847 --> 01:17:05,391 Roy, there's no such thing as... 1180 01:17:05,600 --> 01:17:07,727 ...semi-platonic, Roy. 1181 01:17:09,604 --> 01:17:11,022 There ought to be. 1182 01:17:15,026 --> 01:17:17,028 You should take me home. 1183 01:17:44,806 --> 01:17:45,806 Well... 1184 01:17:46,724 --> 01:17:48,643 Good luck in the Open. 1185 01:19:46,177 --> 01:19:47,845 It's got your name on it. 1186 01:19:49,347 --> 01:19:51,766 It's Lee Janzen and Billy Mayfair. 1187 01:19:53,601 --> 01:19:55,520 They look just like they do on TV. 1188 01:19:55,687 --> 01:19:56,687 Look. 1189 01:19:59,691 --> 01:20:01,192 Look at these balls. 1190 01:20:01,609 --> 01:20:03,027 Brand-new Titleist. 1191 01:20:03,611 --> 01:20:04,696 Look at them. 1192 01:20:04,862 --> 01:20:07,115 Every one of them, brand-new Titleist. 1193 01:20:08,700 --> 01:20:10,743 Sneak a few in the bag. 1194 01:20:11,202 --> 01:20:15,123 We swipe enough free shit, we may pay for this fiasco. 1195 01:20:15,957 --> 01:20:19,293 Would it be inappropriate if I asked Lee Janzen for his autograph? 1196 01:20:19,460 --> 01:20:24,382 I think that's a dead giveaway, but if I got the shanks, we'll be found out soon. 1197 01:20:26,217 --> 01:20:28,636 Hit the 7. You always hit that good. 1198 01:20:29,053 --> 01:20:30,049 Good thinking. 1199 01:20:30,149 --> 01:20:31,472 Come on, man. 1200 01:20:33,891 --> 01:20:35,435 Keep your head down. 1201 01:20:35,727 --> 01:20:37,562 You're making me nervous. 1202 01:20:43,651 --> 01:20:45,320 - Who hit that shot?! - Yeah, who hit it? 1203 01:20:45,486 --> 01:20:46,571 Anyone see? 1204 01:20:46,738 --> 01:20:48,072 You're supposed to be pros! 1205 01:20:49,240 --> 01:20:51,492 - A little thin. - A little fucking thin. 1206 01:20:51,659 --> 01:20:53,119 I still got the shanks. 1207 01:20:53,328 --> 01:20:55,163 - Don't worry. - Everyone's watching. 1208 01:20:55,330 --> 01:20:56,581 Nobody's watching. 1209 01:20:56,748 --> 01:20:59,500 Just hit them up. Just stand up there. You can do it. 1210 01:21:14,015 --> 01:21:16,642 The guys down the line are a little concerned. 1211 01:21:17,101 --> 01:21:18,102 You're Tin Cup? 1212 01:21:18,269 --> 01:21:21,439 Right, McAvoy from West Texas. We're from West Texas. 1213 01:21:21,606 --> 01:21:22,649 Try aiming left. 1214 01:21:22,857 --> 01:21:25,610 Try backing up and giving me just a little room. 1215 01:21:29,614 --> 01:21:30,865 That's Johnny Miller. 1216 01:21:31,032 --> 01:21:32,533 I don't give a fuck. 1217 01:21:32,867 --> 01:21:34,369 Jesus, Cup. 1218 01:21:34,702 --> 01:21:37,163 - Can I have your autograph. - No problem. To who? 1219 01:21:38,206 --> 01:21:39,874 To Romeo, my best friend, 1220 01:21:41,000 --> 01:21:42,210 Good luck to you guys. 1221 01:21:42,543 --> 01:21:45,880 You might want to make plane reservations soon, the way you're hitting. 1222 01:21:46,047 --> 01:21:48,341 Great Open in '73. 1223 01:21:48,508 --> 01:21:50,418 - What a nice guy. - Did you get his autograph? 1224 01:21:50,518 --> 01:21:53,471 - Yeah, look... my best friend. - See who's over there? 1225 01:21:53,846 --> 01:21:54,847 Jesus Christ. 1226 01:21:55,014 --> 01:21:57,016 It's only an autograph, man. 1227 01:21:57,350 --> 01:21:59,060 Simms is here. 1228 01:22:02,105 --> 01:22:03,105 Shit. 1229 01:22:03,856 --> 01:22:05,892 Hit your putter, you can't shank. 1230 01:22:05,992 --> 01:22:09,362 You're the Mexican Mac O'Grady. Figure out why I'm shanking. 1231 01:22:09,737 --> 01:22:11,698 - Now what? - Shoot. 1232 01:22:11,864 --> 01:22:13,866 I'm catching it on the hosel? 1233 01:22:14,450 --> 01:22:15,952 Moving my head? 1234 01:22:16,244 --> 01:22:18,246 - I'm laying it off? - That, too. 1235 01:22:18,454 --> 01:22:19,539 I'm pronating. 1236 01:22:19,706 --> 01:22:23,376 - When you're not supinating. - I'm clearing too early, too late. 1237 01:22:23,543 --> 01:22:25,878 My swing feels like an unfolding chair! 1238 01:22:29,382 --> 01:22:31,384 Put your change in your left pocket. 1239 01:22:32,135 --> 01:22:33,636 Go on, do it. 1240 01:22:37,974 --> 01:22:41,060 Now, tie your left shoe in a double knot. 1241 01:22:41,227 --> 01:22:43,730 - Tie my left shoe? - Right now, do it! 1242 01:22:50,737 --> 01:22:52,155 Turn the hat backwards. 1243 01:22:52,447 --> 01:22:54,782 Turn your hat around. Do it, Roy! 1244 01:22:59,162 --> 01:23:00,413 Take this tee... 1245 01:23:00,580 --> 01:23:01,914 ...and stick it... 1246 01:23:02,498 --> 01:23:03,791 ...behind your left ear. 1247 01:23:06,294 --> 01:23:07,920 I look like a fool! 1248 01:23:08,087 --> 01:23:12,091 What do you think you look like shooting chili peppers up Janzen's ass? 1249 01:23:14,010 --> 01:23:16,304 Do it now or I'm going to quit. 1250 01:23:16,512 --> 01:23:18,514 I swear to God I'll quit. 1251 01:23:19,932 --> 01:23:20,932 Good. 1252 01:23:21,267 --> 01:23:22,268 Take this ball... 1253 01:23:22,435 --> 01:23:24,437 ...and hit it up the fairway. 1254 01:23:24,604 --> 01:23:25,772 You're ready. 1255 01:23:40,453 --> 01:23:41,704 How'd I do that? 1256 01:23:41,829 --> 01:23:45,792 Because you're not thinking about shanking or Molly. 1257 01:23:45,958 --> 01:23:47,210 You're not thinking. 1258 01:23:47,335 --> 01:23:50,338 You're looking like a fool, hitting the ball pure and simple... 1259 01:23:50,546 --> 01:23:51,500 Fuck you. 1260 01:23:51,600 --> 01:23:54,133 Fuck me, huh? Well, you're cured. 1261 01:23:56,344 --> 01:23:57,637 That's it? 1262 01:23:58,346 --> 01:23:59,639 That's it. 1263 01:23:59,806 --> 01:24:01,974 Your brain was getting in the way. 1264 01:24:03,559 --> 01:24:05,728 That's hardly ever been the case. 1265 01:24:05,853 --> 01:24:07,230 No shit, Sherlock. 1266 01:24:07,355 --> 01:24:08,648 What next? 1267 01:24:10,733 --> 01:24:13,236 You should work on your short game but... 1268 01:24:13,987 --> 01:24:15,238 ...get drunk. 1269 01:24:15,363 --> 01:24:16,823 Get drunk? 1270 01:24:17,490 --> 01:24:19,075 You play better. 1271 01:24:21,244 --> 01:24:22,829 Remember Brownsville? 1272 01:24:24,998 --> 01:24:25,942 Come on. 1273 01:24:26,042 --> 01:24:27,083 When do I tee off? 1274 01:24:27,250 --> 01:24:29,752 At 7:08. We're the first guys going. 1275 01:24:29,877 --> 01:24:32,171 Come on, one more, just do it. 1276 01:24:32,338 --> 01:24:33,313 Come on. 1277 01:24:33,413 --> 01:24:35,258 - Get it down. - That's in 4 hours. 1278 01:24:35,383 --> 01:24:36,383 Right. 1279 01:24:39,846 --> 01:24:43,766 Here's to the finely-tuned athlete on the verge of greatness. 1280 01:25:00,992 --> 01:25:02,493 Should have set an alarm. 1281 01:25:04,787 --> 01:25:06,414 The 7:08 pairing... 1282 01:25:06,622 --> 01:25:09,709 ...from Salami, Texas, Mr. Roy McAvoy. 1283 01:25:10,918 --> 01:25:12,795 Any time for a quick bucket? 1284 01:25:12,920 --> 01:25:13,921 Tee it up. 1285 01:25:16,132 --> 01:25:19,218 We almost missed the starting time getting you off the floor. 1286 01:25:19,385 --> 01:25:22,305 You don't handle hooch like you used to. 1287 01:25:23,431 --> 01:25:27,310 I've seen this hole on TV. Hit the big dog up the chute. 1288 01:25:27,435 --> 01:25:31,314 I've learned my lesson. I'll play it safe, smart... 1289 01:25:31,898 --> 01:25:33,316 ...conservative. 1290 01:25:34,150 --> 01:25:36,569 Fairways and greens. Hand me a 2-iron. 1291 01:25:36,944 --> 01:25:37,944 You sure? 1292 01:25:42,659 --> 01:25:44,077 Here we go. 1293 01:25:51,250 --> 01:25:52,919 Not a good day. 1294 01:25:53,753 --> 01:25:55,171 Be humble. 1295 01:26:02,178 --> 01:26:03,429 Be humble. 1296 01:26:03,596 --> 01:26:04,596 83. 1297 01:26:04,931 --> 01:26:06,599 You're humble now, homes. 1298 01:26:06,974 --> 01:26:08,685 I was hungover. 1299 01:26:09,894 --> 01:26:11,854 Maybe that was a coaching mistake. 1300 01:26:11,980 --> 01:26:14,857 Yeah, maybe it was. Thanks, amigo. 1301 01:26:15,441 --> 01:26:16,859 David Simms... 1302 01:26:16,985 --> 01:26:21,489 ...is the first-round leader at the U.S. Open after a brilliant 67. 1303 01:26:22,198 --> 01:26:24,367 Well, Jim, I must tell you... 1304 01:26:24,492 --> 01:26:28,871 ...I didn't expect to go out there right out and shoot a 67. 1305 01:26:31,624 --> 01:26:35,211 I've marveled at how you've been able to balance superb play... 1306 01:26:35,378 --> 01:26:37,296 ...with the energy you give... 1307 01:26:37,463 --> 01:26:40,133 ...to so many charities and all of your fans. 1308 01:26:40,299 --> 01:26:43,636 Well, you know I... This game is about... 1309 01:26:43,803 --> 01:26:46,305 ...tradition and integrity and honor. 1310 01:26:46,514 --> 01:26:49,475 You know, the U.S. Open is it for us. 1311 01:26:49,642 --> 01:26:53,396 So I'm going to go out tomorrow and try to make some good swings. 1312 01:26:53,521 --> 01:26:54,814 Lord willing... 1313 01:26:55,148 --> 01:26:56,524 ...I'll do well and... 1314 01:26:56,733 --> 01:26:59,152 The Anti-Christ shoots 67. 1315 01:26:59,736 --> 01:27:00,903 Believe that? 1316 01:27:01,029 --> 01:27:04,407 Yeah, the old Antichrist had a hot putter today. 1317 01:27:04,991 --> 01:27:06,326 Good seeing you. 1318 01:27:08,161 --> 01:27:10,913 Be well, buddy. I'll see you out in the trenches. 1319 01:27:11,914 --> 01:27:13,666 I must run right now... 1320 01:27:13,833 --> 01:27:15,501 ...but I'll see you later. 1321 01:27:16,044 --> 01:27:18,421 Christ Almighty Jesus. 1322 01:27:19,547 --> 01:27:21,341 The cover or nothing. 1323 01:27:21,507 --> 01:27:24,844 They want you for USA Weekend. We're saying it's the cover or no go. 1324 01:27:27,055 --> 01:27:28,765 Excuse me, Mr. Simms. 1325 01:27:28,931 --> 01:27:31,434 Would you give our grandson an autograph? 1326 01:27:31,559 --> 01:27:32,935 Please, Mr. Simms? 1327 01:27:33,061 --> 01:27:36,064 Can you people not see that I'm busy? I'm working. 1328 01:27:36,356 --> 01:27:37,774 This is my office. 1329 01:27:37,940 --> 01:27:40,568 Do I come to your office and ask for an autograph? 1330 01:27:40,777 --> 01:27:42,070 I don't think so. 1331 01:27:42,278 --> 01:27:43,478 Jesus. 1332 01:27:43,696 --> 01:27:45,073 What an ugly dog. 1333 01:27:46,074 --> 01:27:47,950 It's okay, Joe. 1334 01:28:01,589 --> 01:28:03,299 - Nice playing. - Hell of a round. 1335 01:28:03,549 --> 01:28:04,717 Great start. 1336 01:28:04,884 --> 01:28:06,719 I got lucky out there. 1337 01:28:09,555 --> 01:28:10,807 Hello, Cup. 1338 01:28:12,475 --> 01:28:16,062 I heard you put a monster number up there. 1339 01:28:16,229 --> 01:28:18,231 It could have been worse. 1340 01:28:19,065 --> 01:28:23,403 I played in the Pro-Am with some asshole movie star here once. 1341 01:28:24,737 --> 01:28:26,489 Shot an 82. 1342 01:28:27,240 --> 01:28:29,242 Now, how in the world... 1343 01:28:29,409 --> 01:28:32,328 ...can a great ball-striker like you... 1344 01:28:32,620 --> 01:28:33,830 ...a legend... 1345 01:28:35,498 --> 01:28:37,750 ...manage to put up an 83? 1346 01:28:38,334 --> 01:28:41,129 Well, I missed a 4-foot putt on 18... 1347 01:28:41,337 --> 01:28:42,755 ...for an 82. 1348 01:28:43,339 --> 01:28:44,632 That's how. 1349 01:28:45,091 --> 01:28:49,262 Ain't like playing some muni-track in Brownsville, is it? 1350 01:28:50,138 --> 01:28:53,016 Does "integrity, tradition and honor"... 1351 01:28:53,433 --> 01:28:55,643 ...include kicking a man when he's down? 1352 01:28:58,771 --> 01:29:00,773 This is just guy stuff. 1353 01:29:01,774 --> 01:29:03,151 It's just bar talk. 1354 01:29:03,359 --> 01:29:04,359 No offense? 1355 01:29:04,610 --> 01:29:07,447 This man still has a lot of great golf shots in his system. 1356 01:29:07,613 --> 01:29:09,115 It's okay. Go away. 1357 01:29:09,282 --> 01:29:12,285 Just... I don't need any attention right now. 1358 01:29:12,535 --> 01:29:16,039 I'll bet you $100 that Roy can hit a ball... 1359 01:29:16,164 --> 01:29:18,875 ...through the door, over the patio into the river. 1360 01:29:19,042 --> 01:29:21,961 And, Harold, give me a vodka tonic with a twist. 1361 01:29:23,629 --> 01:29:25,798 Really, this isn't dignified. 1362 01:29:26,883 --> 01:29:28,968 Oh, I am so sorry. 1363 01:29:30,303 --> 01:29:31,888 I just want to go home. 1364 01:29:32,805 --> 01:29:34,307 What about the river? 1365 01:29:34,891 --> 01:29:38,061 The piranha, the immortality, all that bullshit? 1366 01:29:38,644 --> 01:29:41,397 You going to drag your ass home with an 83? 1367 01:29:44,484 --> 01:29:45,484 $200. 1368 01:29:46,486 --> 01:29:47,570 For $200... 1369 01:29:48,321 --> 01:29:53,159 ...Roy can hit the ball through the bar, out the patio, into the river... 1370 01:29:53,326 --> 01:29:56,704 ...and make that pelican right there fly off its post. 1371 01:29:57,080 --> 01:29:58,581 From right here. 1372 01:30:02,418 --> 01:30:03,503 God Almighty. 1373 01:30:03,670 --> 01:30:05,338 This is ridiculous. 1374 01:30:09,217 --> 01:30:11,427 You got the shot, pods. 1375 01:30:11,928 --> 01:30:13,680 Romeo, shut up. 1376 01:30:14,097 --> 01:30:17,684 Just turn it over and start it off low and go it right to left... 1377 01:30:17,850 --> 01:30:18,935 He can do it. 1378 01:30:19,102 --> 01:30:23,731 You can do it. And I'm not leaving till one of you men act in a manly fashion. 1379 01:30:23,940 --> 01:30:25,858 Can we get this over with? 1380 01:30:33,449 --> 01:30:34,701 One ball... 1381 01:30:34,867 --> 01:30:36,452 ...one swing... 1382 01:30:38,246 --> 01:30:39,246 ...one... 1383 01:30:40,039 --> 01:30:41,249 ...pelican. 1384 01:30:42,125 --> 01:30:43,126 From there. 1385 01:30:44,127 --> 01:30:45,253 You can do it. 1386 01:30:45,461 --> 01:30:47,755 You're the man. Shut him up. 1387 01:30:57,974 --> 01:30:59,392 One swing? 1388 01:30:59,559 --> 01:31:00,893 One swing. 1389 01:31:01,060 --> 01:31:02,056 4 to 1. 1390 01:31:02,156 --> 01:31:03,646 Give him 10-1. 1391 01:31:06,399 --> 01:31:07,984 I'll need a fairway. 1392 01:31:08,151 --> 01:31:09,652 Here's what he's got. 1393 01:31:09,777 --> 01:31:14,490 30 yards of bar and grill, then must go through the doors, over umbrellas... 1394 01:31:14,657 --> 01:31:16,492 ...then carry 30 yards of river. 1395 01:31:16,659 --> 01:31:18,911 He must pop that pelican off its perch. 1396 01:31:19,078 --> 01:31:20,913 Kind of a thin line. 1397 01:31:21,080 --> 01:31:24,167 Beats that deep shit rough you were in all day. 1398 01:31:25,376 --> 01:31:26,711 Pelican's on the other side. 1399 01:31:27,170 --> 01:31:29,172 What a tough shot. 1400 01:31:29,422 --> 01:31:34,010 He's just got to be thinking of that brutal, ego-sapping, manhood-robbing... 1401 01:31:34,177 --> 01:31:36,679 ...83 he buried himself under today. 1402 01:31:36,804 --> 01:31:38,431 That's an avalanche of strokes. 1403 01:31:39,265 --> 01:31:40,808 Get control of that guy. 1404 01:31:41,017 --> 01:31:43,102 Will you shut up? Get down. 1405 01:31:56,616 --> 01:31:58,284 Did you see that shot?! 1406 01:31:58,534 --> 01:32:00,203 Oh, my God! 1407 01:32:05,458 --> 01:32:06,959 That should cover it. 1408 01:32:08,795 --> 01:32:09,795 You know... 1409 01:32:10,963 --> 01:32:12,965 ...you're all fucking nuts. 1410 01:32:22,850 --> 01:32:26,354 You really look good. 1411 01:32:28,815 --> 01:32:29,899 Oh, God. 1412 01:32:59,679 --> 01:33:01,097 Oh, my God. 1413 01:33:01,514 --> 01:33:03,516 I kind of shanked that. 1414 01:33:05,852 --> 01:33:06,852 Come on! 1415 01:33:07,020 --> 01:33:08,020 Shit. 1416 01:33:08,896 --> 01:33:09,896 God. 1417 01:33:10,898 --> 01:33:12,898 Shit, man. 1418 01:33:13,276 --> 01:33:15,028 Tempo's everything. 1419 01:33:18,114 --> 01:33:19,282 Perfection is... 1420 01:33:19,407 --> 01:33:20,908 ...unattainable. 1421 01:33:23,286 --> 01:33:25,288 You know, someone said... 1422 01:33:25,413 --> 01:33:29,709 ...golf and sex are the only things you don't have to be good at to enjoy. 1423 01:33:32,920 --> 01:33:34,297 Can I have a Mulligan? 1424 01:33:34,422 --> 01:33:36,299 - A what? - Mulligan. 1425 01:33:36,424 --> 01:33:37,884 What's a Mulligan? 1426 01:33:39,719 --> 01:33:41,387 Just hold still... 1427 01:33:41,554 --> 01:33:42,805 ...don't move... 1428 01:33:42,930 --> 01:33:44,432 ...and I'll show you. 1429 01:33:44,807 --> 01:33:47,935 In fact, wait a minute, get on top. I'll show you. 1430 01:33:48,144 --> 01:33:49,395 I'll tee it up. 1431 01:33:50,813 --> 01:33:52,815 Come on, Roy. 1432 01:34:13,169 --> 01:34:15,672 Welcome everyone, Jim Nantz with Ken Venturi. 1433 01:34:15,838 --> 01:34:17,674 The sun's struggling to appear. 1434 01:34:17,840 --> 01:34:20,510 The course is drying up. In case you're just joining us... 1435 01:34:20,677 --> 01:34:25,098 ...David Simms is tied for the lead at 5 under par with Peter Jacobsen. 1436 01:34:25,264 --> 01:34:29,352 But the real story today involves a driving range pro... 1437 01:34:29,602 --> 01:34:32,772 ...who shot an opening round 83 yesterday... 1438 01:34:33,106 --> 01:34:35,775 ...but is now making U.S. Open history. 1439 01:34:35,942 --> 01:34:39,750 The single round record in Open history is in jeopardy because of McAvoy. 1440 01:34:39,850 --> 01:34:43,741 Another driving range pro, it's all we needed. 1441 01:34:43,866 --> 01:34:47,704 It's heroes that I need. Not obscure driving range pros. 1442 01:34:47,870 --> 01:34:49,872 Okay, Ben, back at 16. 1443 01:34:51,207 --> 01:34:55,628 This putt he's studied from every angle and I'm sure he knows... 1444 01:34:55,795 --> 01:34:58,881 ...it's got to be firm on the left-hand edge with this putt. 1445 01:34:59,007 --> 01:35:02,635 Get thumbnails on these guys. I don't know where he's from... 1446 01:35:02,802 --> 01:35:06,222 ...but here he is, going ten under, if he makes it. 1447 01:35:09,308 --> 01:35:11,519 Look at that. Smooth as silk. 1448 01:35:11,728 --> 01:35:13,229 He's made it! 1449 01:35:13,646 --> 01:35:16,399 10 under par for McAvoy! 1450 01:35:16,733 --> 01:35:18,401 Man alive! 1451 01:35:18,526 --> 01:35:22,030 This is the stuff of legend, I would say. 1452 01:35:25,241 --> 01:35:26,659 Who is McAvoy? 1453 01:35:27,827 --> 01:35:30,038 You ever hear of this McAvoy guy? 1454 01:35:30,496 --> 01:35:34,667 Roy McAvoy, after a par at 17. An eagle to shoot 60... 1455 01:35:35,168 --> 01:35:38,504 ...although no one has knocked it onto the green in 2 here today. 1456 01:35:38,671 --> 01:35:40,665 It's not a shot you want to be aggressive with. 1457 01:35:40,765 --> 01:35:42,750 You gotta be conservative, you gotta think to shot out. 1458 01:35:42,850 --> 01:35:43,850 He's in great position. 1459 01:35:44,177 --> 01:35:46,179 It's a 3 shot par 5. 1460 01:35:46,346 --> 01:35:49,057 Especially today, a little wind in the face. 1461 01:35:49,265 --> 01:35:52,560 John Daly ended up in the water going for this green in two. 1462 01:35:52,769 --> 01:35:55,271 237, man, to carry that water. 1463 01:36:00,026 --> 01:36:01,527 237, man. 1464 01:36:09,369 --> 01:36:10,578 3-wood. 1465 01:36:18,211 --> 01:36:19,186 Hit hard. 1466 01:36:19,286 --> 01:36:23,383 Jimmy, if he lays up, he takes the bogey out of play. 1467 01:36:23,549 --> 01:36:26,719 He goes for the green, he brings 6 in, he brings 7 in. 1468 01:36:26,886 --> 01:36:28,971 He must remember he's in contention. 1469 01:36:29,263 --> 01:36:31,849 He has a chance to win. He must play smart. 1470 01:36:43,736 --> 01:36:45,571 He didn't have enough club. 1471 01:36:46,990 --> 01:36:48,491 Well, what the hell? 1472 01:36:48,616 --> 01:36:50,743 You ride her until she bucks you... 1473 01:36:51,077 --> 01:36:52,578 ...or don't ride at all. 1474 01:36:52,745 --> 01:36:55,623 If he can still knock a wedge close and make par... 1475 01:36:55,999 --> 01:37:00,253 ...it'd be one of the most remarkable turn-arounds in history. 1476 01:37:00,420 --> 01:37:04,424 He's got 85 yards from here and the drop zone is short of the water. 1477 01:37:04,590 --> 01:37:08,761 He'll need to get it on the upper level of the multi-terraced green. 1478 01:37:13,433 --> 01:37:18,354 That's a good solid shot leaving him about 12 feet away for par. 1479 01:37:18,521 --> 01:37:20,356 A par and 62... 1480 01:37:20,606 --> 01:37:23,526 ...the all-time Open round record. 1481 01:37:35,371 --> 01:37:36,367 Good stroke. 1482 01:37:36,467 --> 01:37:37,463 He's got it. 1483 01:37:37,874 --> 01:37:38,875 Unbelievable. 1484 01:37:39,042 --> 01:37:41,044 McAvoy has done it. 1485 01:37:41,294 --> 01:37:45,298 You just saw the greatest round in U.S. Open history. 1486 01:37:45,465 --> 01:37:46,465 62. 1487 01:37:47,884 --> 01:37:52,472 The all-time lowest round in a major doesn't belong to a Jack Nicklaus... 1488 01:37:52,680 --> 01:37:54,557 ...or an Arnold Palmer... 1489 01:37:54,682 --> 01:37:56,309 ...Hogan or Sneed. 1490 01:37:56,476 --> 01:37:59,145 It's been shot by the most improbable artist. 1491 01:37:59,312 --> 01:38:01,564 Roy McAvoy has his signature... 1492 01:38:01,689 --> 01:38:04,442 ...on golf's all-time masterpiece round. 1493 01:38:12,158 --> 01:38:16,913 I've got money from the bet. Let's go somewhere fancy and celebrate. 1494 01:38:17,205 --> 01:38:20,917 There's nothing to celebrate. Besides, these are my people. 1495 01:38:21,709 --> 01:38:25,338 I'm a Waffle House guy. Got to stay in touch with that. 1496 01:38:25,588 --> 01:38:27,507 Plus, he needs his carbohydrates. 1497 01:38:27,674 --> 01:38:31,427 Plus, if the boys in Salome were in town, they'd come here. 1498 01:38:33,179 --> 01:38:34,222 The legend! 1499 01:38:34,514 --> 01:38:36,849 We've been on a bus 2 days. 1500 01:38:40,353 --> 01:38:41,562 It's so good to see you. 1501 01:38:42,188 --> 01:38:43,940 Sweet 62! 1502 01:38:44,440 --> 01:38:46,359 Put the tables together. 1503 01:38:49,612 --> 01:38:51,239 Does this feel like home? 1504 01:38:51,531 --> 01:38:54,534 We just want you to know we are with you all the way. 1505 01:38:54,701 --> 01:38:56,953 Doreen, meet Dr. Griswold. 1506 01:38:57,745 --> 01:38:58,955 This is Molly. 1507 01:39:00,123 --> 01:39:01,123 She's my shrink. 1508 01:39:01,457 --> 01:39:03,209 Well, ex-shrink. 1509 01:39:03,376 --> 01:39:05,878 We're sleeping together, so I can't be. 1510 01:39:06,462 --> 01:39:07,880 Knew it. Thanks. 1511 01:39:08,047 --> 01:39:09,215 Knew what? 1512 01:39:09,382 --> 01:39:10,466 Nothing. 1513 01:39:10,633 --> 01:39:11,634 Good luck. 1514 01:39:12,385 --> 01:39:15,555 You know what? I've got a little extra cash... 1515 01:39:15,722 --> 01:39:19,142 ...why don't we go somewhere a little fancy and celebrate? 1516 01:39:19,267 --> 01:39:20,267 Why? 1517 01:39:20,768 --> 01:39:22,061 In honor of... 1518 01:39:22,228 --> 01:39:23,213 It's the Waffle House. 1519 01:39:23,313 --> 01:39:24,564 I know. 1520 01:39:24,731 --> 01:39:28,151 I've been dreaming about waffles for 1,800 miles. 1521 01:39:28,276 --> 01:39:29,652 Me too. 1522 01:39:29,777 --> 01:39:32,780 There's a Waffle House like this in Odessa, Texas. 1523 01:39:33,781 --> 01:39:34,756 No, Midlands. 1524 01:39:34,856 --> 01:39:36,075 It's in Odessa. 1525 01:39:36,242 --> 01:39:39,579 It's in Odessa. I'm from Odessa. I was born there. 1526 01:39:39,746 --> 01:39:41,164 That's where it is. 1527 01:39:41,289 --> 01:39:42,498 The man. 1528 01:39:42,665 --> 01:39:43,750 To the Cup! 1529 01:39:43,916 --> 01:39:44,891 Cup Man! 1530 01:39:44,991 --> 01:39:46,294 You didn't have to do that. 1531 01:39:47,587 --> 01:39:49,505 You look lovely tonight. 1532 01:39:50,089 --> 01:39:51,424 Thank you. 1533 01:39:53,092 --> 01:39:56,095 I don't know if anyone told you, but you're a great dancer. 1534 01:39:57,180 --> 01:39:58,306 Really? 1535 01:39:58,931 --> 01:40:02,268 But they had one there. That's all I'm saying. 1536 01:40:02,435 --> 01:40:04,020 It was Odessa. 1537 01:40:04,187 --> 01:40:07,023 That's not what I was talking about, you know where we stopped. 1538 01:40:07,190 --> 01:40:09,317 There's an easy way to figure this out. 1539 01:40:09,525 --> 01:40:11,027 You ever tango? 1540 01:40:12,695 --> 01:40:13,695 No. 1541 01:40:14,947 --> 01:40:16,115 Do you? 1542 01:40:19,535 --> 01:40:21,537 Romeo, you dance? 1543 01:40:22,330 --> 01:40:24,123 It doesn't matter! 1544 01:40:25,208 --> 01:40:27,335 It doesn't get much better than this. 1545 01:40:31,839 --> 01:40:36,719 This extraordinary Roy McAvoy, he just won't go away. 1546 01:40:36,886 --> 01:40:41,140 This humble pro from Salome, wherever that is. 1547 01:40:41,307 --> 01:40:43,851 - Little town, west Texas. - It hasn't been discovered yet. 1548 01:40:44,060 --> 01:40:46,062 Over to 18, guys, quickly. 1549 01:40:46,229 --> 01:40:48,147 John Cook at the par 518th. 1550 01:40:48,314 --> 01:40:52,485 No stranger to championship play. And he's going to lay up. 1551 01:40:53,820 --> 01:40:56,322 Meanwhile, here's Roy McAvoy. 1552 01:40:56,489 --> 01:40:59,242 He has the same shot he knocked in the water yesterday. 1553 01:40:59,367 --> 01:41:02,245 The thing to do is tune out the gallery saying "go for it". 1554 01:41:02,370 --> 01:41:05,832 He's back in contention, but he must continue to play smart. 1555 01:41:06,082 --> 01:41:07,500 Give me a 3-wood. 1556 01:41:12,505 --> 01:41:16,759 He's pulled the 3-wood and he continues to play without an ounce of fear. 1557 01:41:16,884 --> 01:41:18,970 That is just inexperience, just pure and simple. 1558 01:41:19,387 --> 01:41:22,765 This is for Venturi up in the booth thinking I should lay up. 1559 01:41:23,266 --> 01:41:27,270 What does he know? He only won this tournament before you were born. 1560 01:41:32,900 --> 01:41:37,864 Caught it a little bit high, a breeze in his face. That's got to go. 1561 01:41:38,489 --> 01:41:41,242 - He's done it again. - No, not again. 1562 01:41:41,534 --> 01:41:44,620 He has found the water for the third straight day. 1563 01:41:44,787 --> 01:41:46,539 What was he thinking about? 1564 01:41:46,706 --> 01:41:48,124 Give me another ball. 1565 01:41:50,418 --> 01:41:51,383 What? 1566 01:41:51,483 --> 01:41:52,712 It's a water hazard. 1567 01:41:53,046 --> 01:41:57,050 You go up there and take a drop. Try to save par, like yesterday. 1568 01:41:57,884 --> 01:41:59,052 You're right. 1569 01:41:59,802 --> 01:42:01,554 What the hell was I thinking? 1570 01:42:02,388 --> 01:42:03,723 He's tied for the lead... 1571 01:42:03,890 --> 01:42:06,643 ...this Roy McAvoy, this "Tin Cup" this empty cup... 1572 01:42:06,809 --> 01:42:08,811 ...this air-brain out of nowhere. 1573 01:42:08,936 --> 01:42:10,229 West Texas. 1574 01:42:10,396 --> 01:42:12,398 Thank you for West Texas. 1575 01:42:12,565 --> 01:42:17,070 You went for the green on 18 today. Do you think that cost you? 1576 01:42:17,236 --> 01:42:19,072 I saved par, didn't I? 1577 01:42:19,947 --> 01:42:20,982 Didn't I? 1578 01:42:21,082 --> 01:42:25,424 You had the same shot yesterday on 18 without a headwind. 1579 01:42:25,524 --> 01:42:27,113 You don't think I can? 1580 01:42:27,213 --> 01:42:28,213 It's unlikely. 1581 01:42:29,374 --> 01:42:31,867 So am I. Look at me, all right? 1582 01:42:31,967 --> 01:42:35,788 Look what I'm wearing. I'm playing for Rio Grande Short-Haul Trucking. 1583 01:42:35,888 --> 01:42:37,799 Brink's and Brown's Sanitation. 1584 01:42:39,258 --> 01:42:43,304 First State Bank of Salome. Woody's Smokehouse. 1585 01:42:44,430 --> 01:42:48,142 You think a guy like me bothers to worry about the percentages? 1586 01:43:09,914 --> 01:43:12,834 Are you nervous about tomorrow, Roy? 1587 01:43:19,924 --> 01:43:22,343 It won't always be like this, you know. 1588 01:43:22,635 --> 01:43:23,635 What? 1589 01:43:25,013 --> 01:43:27,849 With me, surrounded by all these guys snoring. 1590 01:43:28,016 --> 01:43:31,269 Stripper ex-girlfriend laying across from us. 1591 01:43:33,271 --> 01:43:35,773 My caddie sleeping next to her. 1592 01:43:37,191 --> 01:43:39,527 It won't always be like this. 1593 01:43:39,944 --> 01:43:41,946 Yes, it will, Roy. 1594 01:43:42,655 --> 01:43:44,032 It will. 1595 01:44:09,307 --> 01:44:10,725 Dollar bills. 1596 01:44:18,399 --> 01:44:19,776 Dollar bills. 1597 01:44:27,450 --> 01:44:28,993 Dollar bills. 1598 01:44:41,673 --> 01:44:45,426 First up in the final pairing, from Salome, Texas... 1599 01:44:45,593 --> 01:44:47,762 ...Roy McAvoy. 1600 01:44:48,346 --> 01:44:51,140 Fairways and greens, and don't forget to wave... 1601 01:44:51,349 --> 01:44:52,433 ...as I blow by. 1602 01:44:52,767 --> 01:44:55,853 You mean blow up, don't you, sport? You always do. 1603 01:45:27,927 --> 01:45:31,848 Playing out of Houston, Texas... ...David Simms. 1604 01:45:36,644 --> 01:45:40,481 It's okay, exactly where you are. You're in great shape. 1605 01:45:58,291 --> 01:45:59,625 How's the lie? 1606 01:45:59,792 --> 01:46:01,794 Shit, it's buried. 1607 01:46:03,796 --> 01:46:05,173 Don't touch it. 1608 01:46:05,381 --> 01:46:06,716 I know the rules. 1609 01:46:11,179 --> 01:46:12,513 What'll you do? 1610 01:46:12,680 --> 01:46:14,057 Go right through there. 1611 01:46:14,349 --> 01:46:15,349 Go for it. 1612 01:46:19,562 --> 01:46:21,522 - Oh, God! - Don't worry about it. 1613 01:46:21,648 --> 01:46:25,109 It was my fault. I gave you the wrong club. You'll be fine. 1614 01:46:25,318 --> 01:46:28,196 Don't worry. You did fine. Give me the club. 1615 01:46:28,613 --> 01:46:32,617 We've just heard Roy McAvoy has taken a disastrous double-bogey... 1616 01:46:32,784 --> 01:46:34,786 ...to open his final round here. 1617 01:46:34,952 --> 01:46:36,454 Trouble back there. 1618 01:46:37,538 --> 01:46:39,248 Just keep making pars. 1619 01:46:39,457 --> 01:46:41,876 I'll take 18 of them, all day. 1620 01:46:42,043 --> 01:46:43,961 Do it, and I'll own you. 1621 01:47:12,281 --> 01:47:13,281 Fore! 1622 01:47:18,287 --> 01:47:20,415 Roy McAvoy's second shot... 1623 01:47:20,581 --> 01:47:24,127 ...at the second hole has gone deep into the woods. 1624 01:47:24,293 --> 01:47:27,255 For a report on his plight, let's go to Gary McCord... 1625 01:47:27,839 --> 01:47:32,010 ...who has spent most of his life in the woods and in darkness. 1626 01:47:32,135 --> 01:47:34,012 He's in jail here. 1627 01:47:34,137 --> 01:47:35,430 No chance for parole. 1628 01:47:35,596 --> 01:47:40,226 He's got to hit the ball back in the fairway, pitch the ball on the green... 1629 01:47:40,435 --> 01:47:41,769 ...and get up and down for par. 1630 01:47:41,936 --> 01:47:43,771 No chance to hit it on the green. 1631 01:47:45,148 --> 01:47:47,150 $50 says I knock it on with a 7-iron. 1632 01:47:47,608 --> 01:47:48,776 On the green? 1633 01:47:48,943 --> 01:47:49,939 Right. 1634 01:47:50,039 --> 01:47:51,070 You got it. 1635 01:47:51,779 --> 01:47:54,699 Move these people back right here. I'm going right there. 1636 01:47:58,286 --> 01:47:59,620 What's he got? 1637 01:47:59,871 --> 01:48:00,872 What's he doing? 1638 01:48:02,332 --> 01:48:06,169 He's going to try to ricochet off the toilet with a hooded 7-iron. 1639 01:48:06,544 --> 01:48:08,254 He's hitting off the shitter. 1640 01:48:08,463 --> 01:48:10,715 I can't believe he's doing this. 1641 01:48:10,882 --> 01:48:12,467 DVT 1, record. 1642 01:48:12,633 --> 01:48:13,760 Record this. 1643 01:48:23,978 --> 01:48:28,650 Roy McAvoy has banked his third shot at the second hole... 1644 01:48:28,816 --> 01:48:33,738 ...between the trees, off a water closet, or loo, as you might call it... 1645 01:48:33,905 --> 01:48:36,658 ...and got it on the green, somehow, in three. 1646 01:48:36,908 --> 01:48:40,328 May be the shot that gets him back on track here. 1647 01:48:40,495 --> 01:48:42,497 It could erase that double-bogey. 1648 01:48:42,664 --> 01:48:44,582 Best thing that ever happened to him. 1649 01:49:14,487 --> 01:49:16,489 Oh, that was great. 1650 01:49:16,698 --> 01:49:20,493 I didn't know there was a mirror in here. Isn't that cute? 1651 01:49:32,171 --> 01:49:34,173 Let me just look at my... 1652 01:50:18,968 --> 01:50:22,055 Looks level. Roll it in like you know what you're doing. 1653 01:50:24,974 --> 01:50:26,643 Hit it close, sport. 1654 01:51:03,262 --> 01:51:05,473 How did he get the name Tin Cup? 1655 01:51:05,723 --> 01:51:08,810 He was the catcher on the high school baseball team. 1656 01:51:08,977 --> 01:51:10,979 Star pitcher had a curve. 1657 01:51:11,145 --> 01:51:13,356 Not all his pitches hit Roy in the mitt. 1658 01:51:14,482 --> 01:51:18,361 Team thought "Tin Cup" was a whole lot better than "Clank". 1659 01:51:26,327 --> 01:51:27,327 Fuck. 1660 01:51:29,747 --> 01:51:30,832 Too bad. 1661 01:51:47,849 --> 01:51:50,184 Can I ask you a question? 1662 01:51:51,269 --> 01:51:53,479 Have you ever had a Latin lover? 1663 01:51:53,855 --> 01:51:57,400 Where does he get his name from is what I want to know. 1664 01:51:59,777 --> 01:52:03,948 Why did you wait so long to leave that Simms character? 1665 01:52:04,115 --> 01:52:09,037 It takes time to realize Prince Charming might be wearing a beer-stained shirt... 1666 01:52:09,203 --> 01:52:10,788 ...eating sausage... 1667 01:52:10,955 --> 01:52:14,709 ...making $7 an hour in some driving range. 1668 01:52:14,876 --> 01:52:19,797 You don't try to fix men, I hope. Men cannot be fixed, especially him. 1669 01:52:20,048 --> 01:52:22,967 I've been pathetically slow learning that lesson. 1670 01:52:23,593 --> 01:52:25,136 - How are you? - How are you? 1671 01:52:25,303 --> 01:52:26,278 Good. 1672 01:52:26,378 --> 01:52:27,597 I could use help. 1673 01:52:27,805 --> 01:52:31,601 I've seen what you've done with McAvoy. It could come in handy. 1674 01:52:31,809 --> 01:52:33,895 Let me give you my card. 1675 01:52:34,062 --> 01:52:35,146 Great. 1676 01:52:35,355 --> 01:52:39,484 If you have more of these, a bunch of the other guys could use your help. 1677 01:52:39,692 --> 01:52:41,027 Take them all. 1678 01:52:41,194 --> 01:52:43,279 - This is Doreen. - Hi, how are you? 1679 01:52:43,404 --> 01:52:45,698 My number's there, call any time. 1680 01:52:45,907 --> 01:52:48,493 I counsel couples, so bring your caddie if you want. 1681 01:52:48,701 --> 01:52:50,495 I'll think about it, and I'll give you a call. 1682 01:52:50,703 --> 01:52:51,647 Thanks. 1683 01:52:51,747 --> 01:52:53,373 Bye, nice meeting you. 1684 01:52:53,956 --> 01:52:54,921 Cheers. 1685 01:52:55,021 --> 01:52:55,986 Cheers. 1686 01:53:20,984 --> 01:53:23,987 That puts Jacobsen into a tie at 7, guys. 1687 01:53:24,153 --> 01:53:28,074 That Tin Cup guy is one shot back. Let's keep abreast of that. 1688 01:53:28,616 --> 01:53:31,536 That birdie by Peter Jacobsen forged a tie... 1689 01:53:31,786 --> 01:53:33,955 ...at 7 under with David Simms. 1690 01:53:34,122 --> 01:53:36,958 And Roy McAvoy just won't go away. 1691 01:53:37,125 --> 01:53:39,877 He's only one shot back at 6 under par. 1692 01:53:56,394 --> 01:54:00,523 He's throwing darts. If we don't make birdies, we're playing for second. 1693 01:54:00,815 --> 01:54:03,067 Can you believe McAvoy's still here? 1694 01:54:03,234 --> 01:54:06,321 I can't believe "Tin Cup" might appear with my name on a trophy. 1695 01:54:06,487 --> 01:54:09,991 It's come down to the 72nd hole of this championship... 1696 01:54:10,158 --> 01:54:14,078 ...and 3 men all battling to be crowned the Open champion. 1697 01:54:14,245 --> 01:54:16,080 Jacobsen's on the fairway... 1698 01:54:16,247 --> 01:54:17,665 ...at 8 under par... 1699 01:54:17,832 --> 01:54:21,336 ...tied for the lead with Roy McAvoy, who's on the 18th tee. 1700 01:54:21,502 --> 01:54:24,630 And David Simms is back there trailing by one. 1701 01:54:41,272 --> 01:54:43,358 - Jacobsen's laying up. - Took out an iron. 1702 01:54:43,483 --> 01:54:47,862 Jacobsen's going to lay up. He's tied for the lead. 1703 01:54:48,029 --> 01:54:50,031 Assures himself of a par... 1704 01:54:50,198 --> 01:54:51,282 ...and with his short game... 1705 01:54:51,449 --> 01:54:52,742 ...he could make birdie. 1706 01:54:53,951 --> 01:54:55,953 You ain't going to have that luxury. 1707 01:54:58,122 --> 01:54:59,874 Not if you play to win. 1708 01:55:26,150 --> 01:55:28,236 We've seen this position before. 1709 01:55:28,403 --> 01:55:31,489 McAvoy with another perfect drive at the 18th. 1710 01:55:31,614 --> 01:55:35,702 The last thing he needs right now is an excuse to go for the green. 1711 01:55:35,994 --> 01:55:37,245 I didn't catch it all. 1712 01:55:37,412 --> 01:55:40,498 Well, that's okay. You'll have to lay up then. 1713 01:56:16,034 --> 01:56:17,577 This is for par. 1714 01:56:20,788 --> 01:56:22,540 So, birdie wins it. 1715 01:56:23,458 --> 01:56:24,834 That's par. 1716 01:56:26,210 --> 01:56:27,545 He's in the lead. 1717 01:56:29,047 --> 01:56:30,673 They all must catch him. 1718 01:56:30,840 --> 01:56:32,133 You or me, Dave? 1719 01:56:44,646 --> 01:56:46,064 He's laying up. 1720 01:56:47,065 --> 01:56:48,483 He's laying up. 1721 01:56:50,068 --> 01:56:54,572 Birdie to tie, eagle to win. Gutless wonder's laying up. 1722 01:56:54,697 --> 01:56:58,493 It's birdie to win and par to tie for you. Lay up. 1723 01:56:59,661 --> 01:57:02,372 You can still make a birdie laying up. 1724 01:57:03,081 --> 01:57:04,582 You know what? 1725 01:57:04,707 --> 01:57:07,418 If I make an eagle that puts me 10 under. 1726 01:57:07,585 --> 01:57:10,713 No one's ever finished an Open 10 under, not even Nicklaus. 1727 01:57:11,339 --> 01:57:15,593 You don't need an eagle to win. Birdie wins, par ties. 1728 01:57:15,718 --> 01:57:16,886 Lay it up. 1729 01:57:19,681 --> 01:57:23,810 Birdie wins, parties. Hole out a wedge for a goddamn eagle?! 1730 01:57:26,020 --> 01:57:27,522 This is everything. 1731 01:57:27,855 --> 01:57:31,609 This is the choice it comes down to, this is our immortality. 1732 01:57:31,734 --> 01:57:35,822 Don't think about immortality, think "hit the 7-iron". 1733 01:57:39,784 --> 01:57:44,622 No, no, no. This is what always happens. He's going for it. 1734 01:57:44,789 --> 01:57:45,790 Go for it! 1735 01:57:49,210 --> 01:57:50,795 Molly, get a grip. 1736 01:57:51,295 --> 01:57:54,799 He only needs par to tie. Tell him to lay up. 1737 01:57:54,966 --> 01:57:57,468 Go for it, Roy! Just knock it on! 1738 01:57:58,386 --> 01:58:02,140 This is why we broke up. He always went for it. 1739 01:58:02,307 --> 01:58:06,477 My problem is, I've never been with a man who went for it. 1740 01:58:06,644 --> 01:58:08,980 Honey, he's your guy. 1741 01:58:11,232 --> 01:58:12,900 One swing, Roy. 1742 01:58:13,484 --> 01:58:15,570 One good swing. 1743 01:58:18,239 --> 01:58:20,908 John Daly couldn't do it. What's he doing? 1744 01:58:21,075 --> 01:58:23,911 Unbelievable he's going for it 4 days in a row. 1745 01:58:24,078 --> 01:58:26,080 No, 3 days he's put it in the water. 1746 01:58:26,247 --> 01:58:28,750 It'll be 4 days if he hits his 3-wood. 1747 01:58:31,085 --> 01:58:32,670 Come on, baby. 1748 01:58:32,920 --> 01:58:34,255 We're home. 1749 01:58:35,423 --> 01:58:36,924 This has a chance. 1750 01:58:37,091 --> 01:58:38,259 It's got to go. 1751 01:58:38,426 --> 01:58:40,845 This has a chance. I think he's done it. 1752 01:58:43,765 --> 01:58:44,932 Little gust there. 1753 01:58:56,361 --> 01:58:57,445 Stay up! 1754 01:58:57,695 --> 01:58:58,863 Stay up! 1755 01:58:59,864 --> 01:59:01,032 Stay up! 1756 01:59:18,049 --> 01:59:20,218 You can still make par from there. 1757 01:59:20,385 --> 01:59:21,385 Right. 1758 01:59:21,636 --> 01:59:24,055 Take a drop, we'll make par, we'll tie. 1759 01:59:24,222 --> 01:59:27,475 I nutted that thing. I mean, I nutted it. 1760 01:59:27,809 --> 01:59:30,228 I know. You put a hell of a move on it. 1761 01:59:30,395 --> 01:59:32,647 Little gust from the gods cost me. 1762 01:59:32,814 --> 01:59:34,732 We'll take our drop, tie... 1763 01:59:34,899 --> 01:59:36,150 ...and win the playoff. 1764 01:59:36,317 --> 01:59:38,403 - I can make that shot! - I know! 1765 01:59:38,569 --> 01:59:40,071 - But not now! - Now! 1766 01:59:40,822 --> 01:59:43,408 I'm playing it from right here, now. 1767 01:59:44,909 --> 01:59:46,244 Make your par. 1768 01:59:47,078 --> 01:59:48,078 Now. 1769 01:59:48,246 --> 01:59:49,497 Take your drop. 1770 01:59:49,998 --> 01:59:51,082 Give me a ball. 1771 01:59:51,249 --> 01:59:52,917 Unbelievable. 1772 01:59:55,420 --> 01:59:57,422 I can't watch this. 1773 02:00:04,012 --> 02:00:05,096 Fourth shot. 1774 02:00:05,847 --> 02:00:10,268 I don't believe this. He could go up, use the drop zone, make par... 1775 02:00:10,435 --> 02:00:13,688 ...force a playoff with Jacobsen and get out of here. 1776 02:00:13,855 --> 02:00:17,191 Easy, guys. He can still make 5. He can still make 5. 1777 02:00:17,358 --> 02:00:19,444 We could still have a playoff. 1778 02:00:41,049 --> 02:00:42,133 Give me a ball. 1779 02:00:42,800 --> 02:00:43,801 Take a drop. 1780 02:00:44,802 --> 02:00:46,220 Give me a ball! 1781 02:00:47,055 --> 02:00:48,389 Just take your drop. 1782 02:00:55,480 --> 02:00:57,732 Dropping 5, hitting 6. 1783 02:00:57,899 --> 02:01:02,153 What's he doing? All he'd have to do is walk up there and take a drop. 1784 02:01:02,320 --> 02:01:04,739 Make a 5, for crying out loud. That's insane. 1785 02:01:05,239 --> 02:01:06,991 Somebody tackle him. 1786 02:01:09,410 --> 02:01:10,662 Give me a ball. 1787 02:01:23,007 --> 02:01:24,175 Dropping 7... 1788 02:01:24,342 --> 02:01:26,260 ...hitting his 8th shot. 1789 02:01:32,016 --> 02:01:34,686 It's a miracle he lasted this long. 1790 02:01:42,610 --> 02:01:44,779 We ought to have a camera on Simms. 1791 02:01:44,946 --> 02:01:46,531 He can't watch. 1792 02:01:46,698 --> 02:01:49,534 Someone tell him he doesn't have to hit it from there. 1793 02:01:51,452 --> 02:01:54,038 He's dropping 9. He's hitting 10. 1794 02:02:07,135 --> 02:02:09,304 God, I'm going to faint. 1795 02:02:10,888 --> 02:02:12,056 Oh, Jesus. 1796 02:02:19,230 --> 02:02:23,401 This is the last ball in the bag. This gets wet, we're disqualified. 1797 02:02:23,651 --> 02:02:25,403 I can make it across. 1798 02:02:25,570 --> 02:02:26,654 Then do it. 1799 02:02:26,821 --> 02:02:28,406 Quit fucking around. 1800 02:02:38,833 --> 02:02:40,084 He's crazy. 1801 02:02:41,502 --> 02:02:43,504 Oh, God. He's right. 1802 02:02:43,671 --> 02:02:46,841 You're right, Roy! Just knock it on! Let her rip! 1803 02:02:47,008 --> 02:02:49,510 - You're losing it. - I have lost it. 1804 02:02:50,178 --> 02:02:51,262 But so has he. 1805 02:02:54,432 --> 02:02:56,351 - He's crazy. - So are you. 1806 02:02:56,601 --> 02:02:58,019 This is a 12. 1807 02:02:58,186 --> 02:03:01,939 He must start worrying about qualifying for next year's Open. 1808 02:03:02,106 --> 02:03:03,358 He lost this one. 1809 02:03:03,524 --> 02:03:05,109 He'll end up selling... 1810 02:03:05,276 --> 02:03:08,780 ...ties and renting golf carts the rest of his life. 1811 02:03:08,946 --> 02:03:13,201 I don't know what I'm feeling. This is the most painful thing I've ever seen. 1812 02:03:13,534 --> 02:03:17,455 He doesn't finish the hole with this ball... 1813 02:03:17,622 --> 02:03:19,207 ...he's disqualified. 1814 02:03:19,374 --> 02:03:22,377 Oh, my God. Dear Lord, please. Dear Lord. 1815 02:03:46,317 --> 02:03:47,317 Get over. 1816 02:03:53,574 --> 02:03:54,574 He's over. 1817 02:04:22,437 --> 02:04:24,230 I can't believe it! 1818 02:04:26,816 --> 02:04:28,484 I love you! 1819 02:04:30,611 --> 02:04:32,011 My God! 1820 02:04:47,337 --> 02:04:49,505 - Unbelievable! - Jesus Christ! 1821 02:04:49,672 --> 02:04:51,424 Did you see this? 1822 02:04:52,800 --> 02:04:55,345 That was a 12. That was a 12. 1823 02:04:55,637 --> 02:04:57,972 He was on the green and in and out in 12. 1824 02:06:02,120 --> 02:06:04,205 Boss, you blew that one. 1825 02:06:04,372 --> 02:06:08,126 - I didn't come here to play for second. - Simms'll always be second. 1826 02:06:12,964 --> 02:06:16,884 I'll meet you at the Winnebago! I'll fire up the blender! 1827 02:06:20,471 --> 02:06:22,557 I just gave away the U.S. Open. 1828 02:06:28,313 --> 02:06:32,317 That was incredible! That was the shot of the tournament! 1829 02:06:32,900 --> 02:06:35,236 I just gave away the U.S. Open. 1830 02:06:35,403 --> 02:06:36,738 It doesn't matter. 1831 02:06:37,572 --> 02:06:41,492 One time in my life I know the safe play to hit and I still... 1832 02:06:41,659 --> 02:06:43,661 Shit, I still can't make myself do it. 1833 02:06:43,828 --> 02:06:44,824 It doesn't matter. 1834 02:06:44,924 --> 02:06:47,915 My whole career, my whole life on the line... 1835 02:06:48,082 --> 02:06:50,585 I just made a 12 on the last hole of the Open! 1836 02:06:50,752 --> 02:06:54,088 You sure did. It was the greatest 12 of all time. 1837 02:06:54,255 --> 02:06:57,675 No one's going to remember the Open 5 years from now, who won... 1838 02:06:57,842 --> 02:06:59,677 ...but they'll remember your 12! 1839 02:06:59,844 --> 02:07:03,264 My, God, Roy, it was... Well, it's immortal! 1840 02:07:03,431 --> 02:07:05,433 I am so proud of you! 1841 02:07:09,771 --> 02:07:11,773 I gotta hand it to you. 1842 02:07:11,939 --> 02:07:15,026 When you go down, you go down in flames. 1843 02:07:16,361 --> 02:07:17,695 Never mind. 1844 02:07:18,279 --> 02:07:19,364 Kiss me. 1845 02:07:20,698 --> 02:07:23,201 - David, you got a minute? - Not right now. 1846 02:07:24,702 --> 02:07:26,287 Can I have your autograph? 1847 02:07:26,454 --> 02:07:29,374 Sure, I always got time for my fans, darling. 1848 02:07:29,540 --> 02:07:32,043 Don't you look cute. Come on under. 1849 02:07:39,217 --> 02:07:41,052 Nice par, David. 1850 02:08:27,532 --> 02:08:32,370 By finishing in the top 15 at the Open you qualified to be in it next year. 1851 02:08:33,204 --> 02:08:34,288 Really? 1852 02:08:35,957 --> 02:08:37,875 I didn't know that. 1853 02:08:38,042 --> 02:08:42,630 With your game you could go back to the qualifying school and go out on tour. 1854 02:08:45,049 --> 02:08:46,467 Then I wouldn't see you. 1855 02:08:47,385 --> 02:08:51,722 Actually, I picked up a whole bunch of new clients at the Open. 1856 02:08:51,889 --> 02:08:55,810 Guys said if I could do that for you, imagine what I could do for them. 1857 02:08:57,729 --> 02:09:00,231 There's a lot of head cases out there. 1858 02:09:01,566 --> 02:09:03,818 A man goes through what I have... 1859 02:09:03,985 --> 02:09:05,486 ...he's supposed to learn something. 1860 02:09:05,653 --> 02:09:07,739 I'm trying to figure out what I learned. 1861 02:09:10,158 --> 02:09:12,076 You think I learned anything? 1862 02:09:12,994 --> 02:09:16,080 You learned a little discipline, some self-control. 1863 02:09:16,247 --> 02:09:17,832 I learned... 1864 02:09:17,999 --> 02:09:22,003 ...you can't just listen to your heart, but also to your brain. 1865 02:09:22,170 --> 02:09:24,922 I'm learning how to listen to that tuning fork... 1866 02:09:25,089 --> 02:09:27,258 ...throw caution to the wind and... 1867 02:09:27,425 --> 02:09:30,762 ...take crazy risks I never thought were possible. 1868 02:09:31,095 --> 02:09:34,265 Come on, Molly, when did you ever take a crazy risk? 1869 02:09:35,349 --> 02:09:37,268 I'm with you, Roy. 1870 02:09:40,438 --> 02:09:42,106 I'm with you. 1871 02:09:46,360 --> 02:09:47,695 You know... 1872 02:09:48,529 --> 02:09:50,531 ...we could kiss... 1873 02:09:51,866 --> 02:09:54,702 You mean like a no harm, no foul kiss? 1874 02:09:54,869 --> 02:09:57,705 Yeah, kind of a semi-platonic little... 1875 02:09:58,539 --> 02:09:59,540 ...sweet... 1876 02:09:59,707 --> 02:10:00,958 ...innocent... 1877 02:10:01,125 --> 02:10:02,627 Good idea! 136376

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