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1
00:00:02,234 --> 00:00:07,701
( theme music playing )
2
00:01:20,968 --> 00:01:27,334
( singing in native language )
3
00:01:33,734 --> 00:01:37,434
Louie, I finished, eh,
cleaning up the cab.
4
00:01:37,467 --> 00:01:39,334
Good boy, Latka.
5
00:01:39,367 --> 00:01:41,901
Time to split up the old booty.
6
00:01:41,934 --> 00:01:42,934
Yeah.
7
00:01:42,968 --> 00:01:45,234
How much money
did you get today?
8
00:01:45,267 --> 00:01:46,334
Eh, not too much.
9
00:01:46,367 --> 00:01:47,334
( jingles coins )
10
00:01:47,367 --> 00:01:51,300
Two pennies, a dime
and a Canadian quarter?
11
00:01:52,400 --> 00:01:54,133
Yup, that's right.
12
00:01:54,167 --> 00:01:55,868
You mean to tell me
that that's all the money
13
00:01:55,901 --> 00:01:56,901
you got out of
these cabs?
14
00:01:56,934 --> 00:01:58,033
That's all.
15
00:01:58,067 --> 00:02:01,701
You know, Latka,
if you were anybody else,
16
00:02:01,734 --> 00:02:04,400
I'd think you're trying
to pull a fast one on me.
17
00:02:04,434 --> 00:02:08,033
But since it's you,
empty your pockets.
18
00:02:08,067 --> 00:02:09,834
Everything out
on that table.
19
00:02:09,868 --> 00:02:11,033
Everything.
20
00:02:11,067 --> 00:02:12,634
Yeah, but all I have
is just a fe...
21
00:02:12,667 --> 00:02:13,834
a few personal
belongings.
22
00:02:13,868 --> 00:02:14,968
Get 'em out.
23
00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:16,334
All right.
24
00:02:16,367 --> 00:02:18,100
Police state.
25
00:02:19,834 --> 00:02:21,033
Handkerchief...
26
00:02:21,067 --> 00:02:21,968
Yeah, handkerchief.
27
00:02:22,000 --> 00:02:23,467
Eh...
28
00:02:23,501 --> 00:02:24,868
Come on there.
29
00:02:24,901 --> 00:02:26,300
Paintbrush...
30
00:02:26,334 --> 00:02:28,467
A paintbrush.
31
00:02:28,501 --> 00:02:30,901
All right, money,
money, money, money.
32
00:02:30,934 --> 00:02:33,100
And one argyle sock.
33
00:02:34,834 --> 00:02:36,000
Come on, come on.
34
00:02:36,033 --> 00:02:37,300
Eh...
telephone...
35
00:02:37,334 --> 00:02:39,534
Give me that telephone.
36
00:02:39,567 --> 00:02:42,567
Eh, sam-a, sam-a,
sam-a-vich, sam-a-vich.
37
00:02:42,601 --> 00:02:43,667
A sam-a-wich.
38
00:02:43,701 --> 00:02:44,868
No, don't eat
the sam-a-mich--
39
00:02:44,901 --> 00:02:46,033
Get it out.
40
00:02:46,067 --> 00:02:48,167
Okay.
41
00:02:48,200 --> 00:02:50,067
Eh, prayers a-book...
42
00:02:50,100 --> 00:02:52,968
Yeah, come on.
43
00:02:53,000 --> 00:02:54,534
Windshield wiper...
44
00:02:54,567 --> 00:02:55,934
Give me that.
45
00:02:55,968 --> 00:02:58,467
Company property.
46
00:03:00,100 --> 00:03:01,901
Another...
Oh, look. Oh.
47
00:03:01,934 --> 00:03:05,067
( speaking native language )
48
00:03:05,100 --> 00:03:06,534
Come on.
49
00:03:06,567 --> 00:03:07,667
All right.
50
00:03:07,701 --> 00:03:09,167
Cat food.
51
00:03:10,334 --> 00:03:12,834
Cat cookies?!
52
00:03:12,868 --> 00:03:15,434
What do you need
cat cookies for?
53
00:03:15,467 --> 00:03:16,868
Eh...
54
00:03:21,567 --> 00:03:24,267
Get that mangy
thing out of here.
55
00:03:24,300 --> 00:03:27,334
See, this is the Louie
I was telling you about.
56
00:03:27,367 --> 00:03:31,133
Oh... oh.
57
00:03:32,767 --> 00:03:35,234
So y-you recognize
his name.
58
00:03:38,801 --> 00:03:40,167
Hey, Elaine.
59
00:03:40,200 --> 00:03:41,234
Hi, guys.
60
00:03:41,267 --> 00:03:42,267
Well,
well, well.
61
00:03:42,300 --> 00:03:43,267
Where you been?
62
00:03:43,300 --> 00:03:44,501
We ain't seen much
of you lately.
63
00:03:44,534 --> 00:03:45,567
Oh, I know.
64
00:03:45,601 --> 00:03:47,200
I've been spending
every spare minute I have
65
00:03:47,234 --> 00:03:49,367
down at the gallery, you know,
working on the new exhibit.
66
00:03:49,400 --> 00:03:51,334
I feel bad.
67
00:03:51,367 --> 00:03:53,501
I-I feel like I've been
neglecting you guys.
68
00:03:53,534 --> 00:03:54,501
Well, you have.
69
00:03:54,534 --> 00:03:56,367
So, uh, so let's
catch up, you know.
70
00:03:56,400 --> 00:03:57,400
Okay, hey, sit down.
71
00:03:57,434 --> 00:03:58,434
Oh, okay.
72
00:03:58,467 --> 00:04:00,667
So, so what's been
happening?
73
00:04:00,701 --> 00:04:03,033
Uh, uh, Tony, how'd that fight
with Gomez go?
74
00:04:03,067 --> 00:04:04,501
Oh, he knocked me out
in the second round.
75
00:04:04,534 --> 00:04:06,467
Oh. And, uh, hey, Bobby,
76
00:04:06,501 --> 00:04:08,868
weren't you working on
some, uh, experimental play?
77
00:04:08,901 --> 00:04:10,133
Yeah, they closed it.
78
00:04:10,167 --> 00:04:11,300
Oh.
79
00:04:11,334 --> 00:04:12,767
What have
you been doing, Alex?
80
00:04:12,801 --> 00:04:15,767
Well, I went to a bad play
and a short fight.
81
00:04:16,868 --> 00:04:19,100
Well, uh, how about
if we, uh,
82
00:04:19,133 --> 00:04:20,934
we just play a round,
you know, and, uh...
83
00:04:20,968 --> 00:04:22,234
Yeah, let's
do that. Come on.
84
00:04:22,267 --> 00:04:23,167
All right,
all right.
85
00:04:23,200 --> 00:04:24,033
It'll give me time
86
00:04:24,067 --> 00:04:25,501
to relax and, uh, eat my lunch,
87
00:04:25,534 --> 00:04:28,033
and balance my checkbook
and, uh, go through my mail.
88
00:04:28,067 --> 00:04:31,367
Yeah, everyone needs
to loaf once in awhile.
89
00:04:31,400 --> 00:04:32,367
So, Elaine,
you've been spending
90
00:04:32,400 --> 00:04:33,634
a lot of time down
at the gallery, huh?
91
00:04:33,667 --> 00:04:34,767
Oh, yeah.
92
00:04:34,801 --> 00:04:36,634
Well, see, uh, I-I'm in charge
of this new exhibit,
93
00:04:36,667 --> 00:04:37,934
and it's my first time.
94
00:04:37,968 --> 00:04:39,567
It's taking an enormous
amount of work,
95
00:04:39,601 --> 00:04:42,000
but, but if it goes well
at the opening on Saturday,
96
00:04:42,033 --> 00:04:43,868
it could really give
my career a boost.
97
00:04:43,901 --> 00:04:46,467
From nowhere
to almost somewhere.
98
00:04:46,501 --> 00:04:49,434
LOUIE:
Ooh...
99
00:04:49,467 --> 00:04:51,834
Ms. Nardo's here.
100
00:04:51,868 --> 00:04:54,501
Would you care to take
a stroll over to my cage
101
00:04:54,534 --> 00:04:56,167
and, uh, pick up
your messages?
102
00:04:56,200 --> 00:04:57,634
Oh, yeah, okay.
103
00:04:57,667 --> 00:04:59,868
Well, uh, I'll-I'll be right
back, okay?
104
00:04:59,901 --> 00:05:00,868
Hey, I'm in.
105
00:05:00,901 --> 00:05:01,901
BOBBY:
Okay.
106
00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:07,634
Nardo, messages have been
coming in in droves for you.
107
00:05:07,667 --> 00:05:09,100
I got 11 of them.
108
00:05:09,133 --> 00:05:10,300
Count 'em, 11.
109
00:05:10,334 --> 00:05:11,601
I'm sorry, Louie.
110
00:05:11,634 --> 00:05:14,100
Well, here's $11.
111
00:05:14,133 --> 00:05:16,501
Money, Nardo?
112
00:05:16,534 --> 00:05:19,300
Let's not sully
our relationship.
113
00:05:19,334 --> 00:05:22,534
You make me feel so tawdry.
114
00:05:22,567 --> 00:05:24,701
Okay, uh, so what do you want?
115
00:05:24,734 --> 00:05:28,767
How about coming up to my place
tonight, we'll go crazy?
116
00:05:28,801 --> 00:05:31,367
Here's your money, creep.
117
00:05:31,400 --> 00:05:33,501
I'm wearing her down.
118
00:05:35,501 --> 00:05:36,801
BOBBY:
Well, finally.
119
00:05:36,834 --> 00:05:38,267
Well, here we go.
120
00:05:38,300 --> 00:05:39,434
Uh, listen, I just
got a couple
121
00:05:39,467 --> 00:05:41,501
of quick calls to make, and
I'll be right back, okay?
122
00:05:41,534 --> 00:05:42,501
( guys grumble )
123
00:05:42,534 --> 00:05:45,434
No, no, no.
I said I'd play, so I'm going to.
124
00:05:45,467 --> 00:05:46,434
( phone rings )
125
00:05:46,467 --> 00:05:47,968
Yeah, besides I got
to eat my lunch.
126
00:05:48,000 --> 00:05:51,200
Oh, Ms. Nardo, it's for you.
127
00:05:51,234 --> 00:05:53,400
( yells ):
She'll be right there.
128
00:05:53,434 --> 00:05:55,067
Probably the gallery.
129
00:05:55,100 --> 00:05:56,133
You in?
130
00:05:56,167 --> 00:05:57,133
Yeah, yeah, I'm in.
131
00:05:57,167 --> 00:05:58,434
Uh, would somebody get
me some coffee?
132
00:05:58,467 --> 00:05:59,767
It's going to be
a long day.
133
00:05:59,801 --> 00:06:00,767
All right.
134
00:06:00,801 --> 00:06:01,767
Hello.
135
00:06:01,801 --> 00:06:04,501
Gee, Elaine
sure is busy.
136
00:06:04,534 --> 00:06:06,334
Yeah, well, I can
relate to that.
137
00:06:06,367 --> 00:06:08,467
You know, I mean, I got
a hectic schedule, too.
138
00:06:08,501 --> 00:06:10,634
You know, driving a cab,
trying to make it as an actor...
139
00:06:10,667 --> 00:06:12,133
Oh, my God!
That reminds me.
140
00:06:12,167 --> 00:06:13,534
I have an audition today.
141
00:06:13,567 --> 00:06:15,367
To-Tony, Tony, you got the time?
142
00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:16,901
Oh, it's 8:30.
143
00:06:16,934 --> 00:06:19,033
That means I have to be ready
in less than five hours.
144
00:06:19,067 --> 00:06:21,334
It never ends.
145
00:06:21,367 --> 00:06:23,067
You know, my life
can be hectic, too.
146
00:06:23,100 --> 00:06:25,067
Do you realize that
if this was tomorrow,
147
00:06:25,100 --> 00:06:27,334
I'd have to be in the gym
in 15 minutes.
148
00:06:27,367 --> 00:06:32,334
Oh, Tony, Tony, we got to come
up for air sometime.
149
00:06:32,367 --> 00:06:34,400
I hear you.
150
00:06:34,434 --> 00:06:35,968
Is that my coffee?
151
00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:37,100
Yeah,
wait a minute.
152
00:06:37,133 --> 00:06:39,000
How many cups have
you already had today?
153
00:06:39,033 --> 00:06:40,033
Three.
154
00:06:40,067 --> 00:06:41,100
Okay.
155
00:06:41,133 --> 00:06:42,701
I lied, I had eight.
156
00:06:42,734 --> 00:06:44,667
I lied,
that's hot chocolate.
157
00:06:44,701 --> 00:06:46,634
Elaine, can I talk
to you for a minute?
158
00:06:46,667 --> 00:06:47,634
Uh, yeah, sure.
159
00:06:47,667 --> 00:06:48,634
Sit down, please.
160
00:06:48,667 --> 00:06:49,734
Uh, what's on your mind?
161
00:06:49,767 --> 00:06:50,868
I'm worried about you.
162
00:06:50,901 --> 00:06:51,901
Aw.
163
00:06:51,934 --> 00:06:53,734
No "aw," I'm really
worried about you.
164
00:06:53,767 --> 00:06:55,734
I know, I worry about
you too sometimes.
165
00:06:55,767 --> 00:06:57,267
We're not talking about me.
I'm wonderful.
166
00:06:57,300 --> 00:06:58,300
Yeah, you are.
167
00:06:58,334 --> 00:06:59,367
Please, Elaine,
are you okay?
168
00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:00,734
I mean, the way
you've been running...
169
00:07:00,767 --> 00:07:02,501
Oh, Alex, I know
what you're going to say.
170
00:07:02,534 --> 00:07:04,267
You're worried about me
because of the way
171
00:07:04,300 --> 00:07:06,033
I've been running around,
and I seem to be
172
00:07:06,067 --> 00:07:08,334
going in 20 different directions
all at once, and, uh,
173
00:07:08,367 --> 00:07:10,400
you think it's bad for me
and kind of dangerous.
174
00:07:10,434 --> 00:07:12,033
And, uh, I think you're
blowing things way,
175
00:07:12,067 --> 00:07:13,534
way out of proportion,
but okay, okay.
176
00:07:13,567 --> 00:07:15,534
I promise you
that as soon as everything
177
00:07:15,567 --> 00:07:17,834
slows down and I have
taken care of everything
178
00:07:17,868 --> 00:07:20,000
that's hanging over my head
at this moment,
179
00:07:20,033 --> 00:07:22,501
I am going to take a nice,
long, three-week bath.
180
00:07:22,534 --> 00:07:24,567
And I know I talk
too much and thanks.
181
00:07:24,601 --> 00:07:27,934
( phone rings )
I didn't mean to lecture.
182
00:07:27,968 --> 00:07:29,834
Surprise, surprise.
183
00:07:29,868 --> 00:07:32,167
It's for her nibs.
184
00:07:32,200 --> 00:07:35,067
I'm sorry, guys.
185
00:07:35,100 --> 00:07:36,701
Hello.
186
00:07:36,734 --> 00:07:39,667
We're never going to get
this game over with.
187
00:07:39,701 --> 00:07:40,767
Good hand, huh?
188
00:07:40,801 --> 00:07:43,300
What do you mean?
189
00:07:43,334 --> 00:07:45,400
Well, you're
a little impatient, huh?
190
00:07:45,434 --> 00:07:47,434
Oh, no, it's just that
I don't think
191
00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:50,234
that's the way you should
play poker, that's all.
192
00:07:50,267 --> 00:07:52,167
Oh, sure, Tony.
193
00:07:52,200 --> 00:07:54,601
Listen, uh, I-I'll be
just a second, okay?
194
00:07:54,634 --> 00:07:56,834
Take your time.
195
00:07:58,467 --> 00:08:01,167
Listen, that gallery is
a mad house. I got to go.
196
00:08:01,200 --> 00:08:02,200
ALL:
Oh, man.
197
00:08:02,234 --> 00:08:03,367
No, no, listen.
198
00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:05,033
I'm going
to finish this hand.
199
00:08:06,267 --> 00:08:07,300
Gin.
200
00:08:07,334 --> 00:08:09,400
Listen, the show opens
Saturday, 7:00,
201
00:08:09,434 --> 00:08:11,267
and you are all
invited-- bye.
202
00:08:11,300 --> 00:08:14,334
Gin?
203
00:08:14,367 --> 00:08:16,734
Boy, did she catch me
with points.
204
00:08:24,734 --> 00:08:26,133
Hi, Elaine.
205
00:08:26,167 --> 00:08:27,467
Oh, Fran--
206
00:08:27,501 --> 00:08:30,801
uh, these are very
important buyers.
207
00:08:33,367 --> 00:08:34,400
Hello there.
208
00:08:34,434 --> 00:08:35,601
Oh, I am so glad
to see you guys.
209
00:08:35,634 --> 00:08:37,467
Friendly faces,
you know?
210
00:08:37,501 --> 00:08:39,133
How come
you're so early?
211
00:08:39,167 --> 00:08:40,367
Well, we were going
to eat at Mario's first
212
00:08:40,400 --> 00:08:42,801
but Alex said you
had food, so you know.
213
00:08:45,000 --> 00:08:46,734
We got here fast,
before any
214
00:08:46,767 --> 00:08:48,400
freeloaders
scarfed it up.
215
00:08:48,434 --> 00:08:51,434
Yeah, well, uh, you can
have anything you see.
216
00:08:51,467 --> 00:08:53,534
But, uh, hey, guys,
remember last time.
217
00:08:53,567 --> 00:08:56,133
I mean, don't go stuffing
food in your pockets.
218
00:08:56,167 --> 00:08:57,834
She should have
told me that
219
00:08:57,868 --> 00:08:59,934
before I lined them
with tin foil.
220
00:08:59,968 --> 00:09:03,133
Elaine, uh, who's she?
221
00:09:03,167 --> 00:09:05,000
Oh, that's, uh
Fran Strickland.
222
00:09:05,033 --> 00:09:06,901
She's one of
our best artists.
223
00:09:06,934 --> 00:09:10,234
Hey, Elaine,
I'll show you an artist.
224
00:09:10,267 --> 00:09:12,868
So how's it going?
225
00:09:12,901 --> 00:09:15,000
Well, the paintings got
lost, the food came late
226
00:09:15,033 --> 00:09:16,067
Jason's ant
colony broke,
227
00:09:16,100 --> 00:09:17,534
there are ants
all over my house,
228
00:09:17,567 --> 00:09:19,634
and the exterminator
can't come until tomorrow.
229
00:09:19,667 --> 00:09:20,834
And you?
230
00:09:20,868 --> 00:09:22,400
Well, uh, I'm sort of...
231
00:09:22,434 --> 00:09:23,467
Ashtrays, yes.
232
00:09:23,501 --> 00:09:25,000
Just the word
I was looking for.
233
00:09:26,567 --> 00:09:28,467
I, uh...
I like these, uh...
234
00:09:28,501 --> 00:09:29,534
Are they yours?
235
00:09:29,567 --> 00:09:30,634
Yes.
236
00:09:30,667 --> 00:09:32,901
I love these.
237
00:09:34,801 --> 00:09:37,434
Elaine, this is
a great exhibit.
238
00:09:37,467 --> 00:09:38,434
Oh, thanks.
239
00:09:38,467 --> 00:09:40,501
Uh, what do you
like best?
240
00:09:40,534 --> 00:09:43,701
I don't know.
What do you call this?
241
00:09:43,734 --> 00:09:45,300
Elaine!
Yeah?
242
00:09:45,334 --> 00:09:47,234
We have to talk.
243
00:09:47,267 --> 00:09:48,667
Uh, I'll be over there in
a second, okay, Phillip?
244
00:09:48,701 --> 00:09:50,334
I-I'm taking
my paintings down.
245
00:09:50,367 --> 00:09:51,501
What?
246
00:09:51,534 --> 00:09:53,834
Well, I rushed them,
and it shows.
247
00:09:53,868 --> 00:09:55,667
Oh, no, no, um, Phillip.
248
00:09:55,701 --> 00:09:57,734
These, these paintings,
they're wonderful.
249
00:09:57,767 --> 00:09:59,000
No, no,
they're not ready.
250
00:09:59,033 --> 00:10:00,234
I'm sorry,
I can't let them be seen.
251
00:10:00,267 --> 00:10:01,467
No, Phillip!
252
00:10:01,501 --> 00:10:02,667
I mean, come on,
be reasonable.
253
00:10:02,701 --> 00:10:04,534
Uh, Alex, uh, Phillip
wants his paintings down.
254
00:10:04,567 --> 00:10:05,734
Do they look finished to you?
255
00:10:05,767 --> 00:10:06,501
They're great.
256
00:10:06,534 --> 00:10:07,534
Terrific.
257
00:10:07,567 --> 00:10:10,200
I think this one
could use more brown.
258
00:10:11,968 --> 00:10:13,367
That does it.
259
00:10:13,400 --> 00:10:14,701
No, Phillip.
260
00:10:14,734 --> 00:10:15,868
Tony, how could you
do this to me?!
261
00:10:15,901 --> 00:10:16,934
Elaine, Elaine, Elaine.
262
00:10:16,968 --> 00:10:18,067
Everything's okay.
It's okay.
263
00:10:18,100 --> 00:10:19,234
Phillip! Oh, no.
264
00:10:19,267 --> 00:10:20,567
Look, maybe it's
better this way.
265
00:10:20,601 --> 00:10:21,734
Who says an art gallery
266
00:10:21,767 --> 00:10:23,400
has to have paintings
all over the walls?
267
00:10:23,434 --> 00:10:26,133
Alex, I think you better take me
out of here pretty fast.
268
00:10:26,167 --> 00:10:27,434
Why?
MAN: Excuse me, Elaine.
269
00:10:27,467 --> 00:10:28,567
What do you want?
270
00:10:28,601 --> 00:10:30,534
No, no, no. Alex, uh,
this is one of the owners.
271
00:10:30,567 --> 00:10:31,667
Oh, sorry.
H-how do you do?
272
00:10:31,701 --> 00:10:33,300
Hi. Elaine,
it's the champagne.
273
00:10:33,334 --> 00:10:34,667
Uh, what about it?
274
00:10:34,701 --> 00:10:36,634
Well, it's flat,
and several people have noticed.
275
00:10:36,667 --> 00:10:39,534
Well, wha-what do you want me
to do about it?
276
00:10:39,567 --> 00:10:41,934
Well, I don't know, but,
I mean, people like bubbles
277
00:10:41,968 --> 00:10:43,400
in their champagne.
I know I do.
278
00:10:43,434 --> 00:10:44,901
Do you see any bubbles?
279
00:10:44,934 --> 00:10:46,067
You want bubbles?
280
00:10:46,100 --> 00:10:47,868
( blowing bubbles )
281
00:10:53,167 --> 00:10:55,300
I guess that's what I should
expect from a cabdriver.
282
00:10:55,334 --> 00:10:58,534
No, you know what you can
expect from a cabdriver?
283
00:10:58,567 --> 00:11:01,367
( Elaine shouting )
284
00:11:01,400 --> 00:11:02,834
BOBBY:
Low bridge!
285
00:11:11,734 --> 00:11:13,534
Hey! What's the matter
with that guy?
286
00:11:13,567 --> 00:11:14,834
Yeah, you idiot.
287
00:11:14,868 --> 00:11:17,601
Would you just relax?
288
00:11:17,634 --> 00:11:19,100
Me relax? You relax.
289
00:11:19,133 --> 00:11:21,734
We'll both relax, okay?
290
00:11:21,767 --> 00:11:24,767
Elaine, I think you need
to see someone.
291
00:11:24,801 --> 00:11:26,200
What do you mean?
292
00:11:26,234 --> 00:11:29,267
I am not going
to see a psychiatrist.
293
00:11:29,300 --> 00:11:30,534
Why not?
Hah, no.
294
00:11:30,567 --> 00:11:32,400
You think needing help
is a sign of weakness? Yeah.
295
00:11:32,434 --> 00:11:33,567
There's nothing wrong
296
00:11:33,601 --> 00:11:35,234
with needing a little
help once in a while.
297
00:11:35,267 --> 00:11:36,634
Stop trying to be so tough.
298
00:11:36,667 --> 00:11:38,033
Hey, I am a single parent
299
00:11:38,067 --> 00:11:39,968
responsible
for two small children.
300
00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:41,300
Man, I got to be tough.
301
00:11:41,334 --> 00:11:42,801
Okay.
302
00:11:42,834 --> 00:11:44,334
Okay.
303
00:11:45,334 --> 00:11:47,367
Now, what about
your responsibility
304
00:11:47,400 --> 00:11:49,033
to those two
small children?
305
00:11:49,067 --> 00:11:50,801
What's gonna happen
to them? Hmm?
306
00:11:50,834 --> 00:11:51,868
Now, I'm no psychiatrist,
307
00:11:51,901 --> 00:11:53,300
but I can tell
a manic-depressive,
308
00:11:53,334 --> 00:11:54,567
Down syndrome when I see one.
309
00:11:54,601 --> 00:11:55,901
( chuckles )
310
00:11:55,934 --> 00:11:57,601
Alex, I can't
see a psychiatrist.
311
00:11:57,634 --> 00:11:58,334
Why not?
312
00:11:58,367 --> 00:11:59,834
What about the money?
313
00:11:59,868 --> 00:12:01,100
So you'll go to a clinic
314
00:12:01,133 --> 00:12:02,834
where they charge you
according to what you earn.
315
00:12:02,868 --> 00:12:04,501
Now, don't make money the issue.
You're scared.
316
00:12:04,534 --> 00:12:05,701
Of what?
317
00:12:05,734 --> 00:12:07,167
You're scared that
you're gonna find out
318
00:12:07,200 --> 00:12:09,200
you're just as fragile and
needy as all the rest of us.
319
00:12:09,234 --> 00:12:11,701
Alex, I don't need
a psychiatrist.
320
00:12:11,734 --> 00:12:14,667
Yeah. Okay, okay, the pressure's
been getting to me.
321
00:12:14,701 --> 00:12:16,868
I-I'd be stupid
not to admit that now,
322
00:12:16,901 --> 00:12:19,100
but I don't need
to see a psychiatrist.
323
00:12:19,133 --> 00:12:20,400
I don't know.
324
00:12:20,434 --> 00:12:22,901
Maybe I need an arm
around me once in awhile.
325
00:12:22,934 --> 00:12:24,400
( chuckles )
326
00:12:24,434 --> 00:12:26,367
Oh... ( chuckles )
327
00:12:26,400 --> 00:12:28,901
Or a pat on the head.
328
00:12:35,767 --> 00:12:38,767
Or a kiss.
329
00:12:48,234 --> 00:12:49,501
Alex, don't pull away
from me.
330
00:12:49,534 --> 00:12:51,200
I'm not pulling away
from you, Elaine.
331
00:12:51,234 --> 00:12:52,767
Now, sometimes
people get upset,
332
00:12:52,801 --> 00:12:54,934
and instead of dealing
with their problems,
333
00:12:54,968 --> 00:12:57,767
they try to run from them,
like with drinking and eating
334
00:12:57,801 --> 00:13:00,234
and, uh, flirting with
enormously attractive men.
335
00:13:00,267 --> 00:13:01,834
Alex, I don't think
you should kid around
336
00:13:01,868 --> 00:13:02,834
about this.
What?
337
00:13:02,868 --> 00:13:05,100
I mean, come on, you and I
have been pretty close,
338
00:13:05,133 --> 00:13:07,534
and we have cared about
each other for some time now.
339
00:13:07,567 --> 00:13:08,868
I mean, you can't tell me
340
00:13:08,901 --> 00:13:11,033
that, uh, getting closer
has never crossed your mind.
341
00:13:11,067 --> 00:13:12,300
Well, as a matter of fact,
342
00:13:12,334 --> 00:13:14,200
uh, it hasn't kept me
awake nights, no.
343
00:13:14,234 --> 00:13:16,868
It's never
crossed your mind?
344
00:13:16,901 --> 00:13:18,534
Once.
345
00:13:18,567 --> 00:13:20,033
When?
346
00:13:20,067 --> 00:13:24,267
The day you were that red
and white striped dress.
347
00:13:24,300 --> 00:13:27,234
It's crossed my mind once.
348
00:13:27,267 --> 00:13:28,367
When?
349
00:13:28,400 --> 00:13:29,534
Now.
350
00:13:29,567 --> 00:13:30,667
N... Oh.
351
00:13:30,701 --> 00:13:32,868
( starts engine )
352
00:13:32,901 --> 00:13:35,534
( motor abruptly stops )
Oh.
353
00:13:35,567 --> 00:13:38,567
Alex, um, be honest with me.
354
00:13:38,601 --> 00:13:39,901
What are you afraid of?
355
00:13:39,934 --> 00:13:41,234
What am I afraid of?
356
00:13:41,267 --> 00:13:44,567
Elaine, Elaine, uh,
look, I-I'm just afraid
357
00:13:44,601 --> 00:13:46,567
that you're doing this,
maybe unconsciously,
358
00:13:46,601 --> 00:13:48,834
because you just don't
want to deal with the fact
359
00:13:48,868 --> 00:13:51,234
that you might need some
help right now, that's all.
360
00:13:51,267 --> 00:13:52,968
Oh, I love it
when a man tells me
361
00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:54,834
I'm unconsciously
avoiding therapy.
362
00:13:54,868 --> 00:13:56,100
Elaine, Elaine, Elaine.
363
00:13:56,133 --> 00:13:57,868
Stop giving me a
hard time, okay?
364
00:13:57,901 --> 00:13:59,434
I mean, look, uh, uh,
365
00:13:59,467 --> 00:14:02,734
it's not as if part
of me doesn't want to...
366
00:14:02,767 --> 00:14:05,200
uh... uh, doesn't want to...
367
00:14:05,234 --> 00:14:07,667
I'm going to wait it out
till you finish that.
368
00:14:07,701 --> 00:14:09,534
No, no, no. No, no.
I'm just worried about the fact
369
00:14:09,567 --> 00:14:11,200
that we have a great
friendship, a-a-and...
370
00:14:11,234 --> 00:14:12,901
Oh, Alex, I'm a very busy woman.
371
00:14:12,934 --> 00:14:14,834
I've got two jobs and two kids.
372
00:14:14,868 --> 00:14:16,133
Yes or no?
373
00:14:16,167 --> 00:14:17,033
No.
374
00:14:17,067 --> 00:14:19,367
Ah...
375
00:14:19,400 --> 00:14:21,834
Elaine, damn it, it-it
just wouldn't be right.
376
00:14:21,868 --> 00:14:23,200
I-I wouldn't feel right.
377
00:14:23,234 --> 00:14:24,467
Look, you-you've been...
378
00:14:24,501 --> 00:14:26,133
you've been upset
for weeks now.
379
00:14:26,167 --> 00:14:27,534
You've got to see someone.
380
00:14:27,567 --> 00:14:28,868
Okay, okay.
381
00:14:28,901 --> 00:14:31,367
Boy, if you feel that strongly
about it I'm going to go.
382
00:14:31,400 --> 00:14:32,634
I mean, I think
it's a waste of time,
383
00:14:32,667 --> 00:14:34,367
but I'm gonna go
just to prove that you're wrong.
384
00:14:34,400 --> 00:14:35,367
Fine.
385
00:14:35,400 --> 00:14:36,534
Fine.
386
00:14:36,567 --> 00:14:37,868
Take me home.
387
00:14:37,901 --> 00:14:40,234
Fine.
388
00:14:40,267 --> 00:14:42,200
( starts engine )
389
00:14:42,234 --> 00:14:44,067
Hey, but if you do
go to a psychiatrist
390
00:14:44,100 --> 00:14:46,067
and he gives us
the permission to, um...
391
00:14:47,100 --> 00:14:49,934
I'll take you home now.
392
00:15:05,467 --> 00:15:06,434
Hi.
393
00:15:06,467 --> 00:15:07,434
Hi.
394
00:15:07,467 --> 00:15:09,501
I'm Dr. Bernard Collins.
395
00:15:09,534 --> 00:15:11,000
Elaine Nardo.
396
00:15:11,033 --> 00:15:12,667
Nice to know you.
397
00:15:12,701 --> 00:15:14,334
Nice to meet you.
398
00:15:14,367 --> 00:15:16,000
What do you think?
399
00:15:16,033 --> 00:15:18,200
What, uh...?
Oh, I don't know.
400
00:15:18,234 --> 00:15:19,200
Oh, come on.
401
00:15:19,234 --> 00:15:21,968
I know you're
an art connoisseur.
402
00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:23,701
What's your opinion?
403
00:15:23,734 --> 00:15:26,534
Well, uh, I hope you
don't mind my saying this,
404
00:15:26,567 --> 00:15:28,634
but, uh, it stinks.
405
00:15:28,667 --> 00:15:31,200
You didn't pay too much
for it, did you?
406
00:15:31,234 --> 00:15:33,167
Very little.
I painted it.
407
00:15:33,200 --> 00:15:34,367
Oh!
408
00:15:34,400 --> 00:15:36,033
I'm sorry, I didn't...
409
00:15:36,067 --> 00:15:37,234
Oh, no, you're right.
410
00:15:37,267 --> 00:15:38,701
It's terrible.
Oh.
411
00:15:38,734 --> 00:15:43,067
I sometimes use the painting
to test my patients' honesty.
412
00:15:43,100 --> 00:15:45,300
Boy, are you honest.
413
00:15:46,634 --> 00:15:50,868
Uh, uh, don't you sort
of like the eyes?
414
00:15:50,901 --> 00:15:53,234
Yeah, I like the eyes.
415
00:15:53,267 --> 00:15:54,534
Honest but kind.
416
00:15:54,567 --> 00:15:56,100
Have a seat.
417
00:15:56,133 --> 00:15:57,501
Okay.
418
00:16:01,234 --> 00:16:05,501
Could you move a little closer?
419
00:16:05,534 --> 00:16:07,734
I think it's a toll call
over there.
420
00:16:07,767 --> 00:16:10,100
( laughs ):
Gee, uh, I'm sorry.
421
00:16:10,133 --> 00:16:11,634
I just didn't think
422
00:16:11,667 --> 00:16:14,501
I had to get
all the way in the room.
423
00:16:14,534 --> 00:16:17,834
This is going to be so easy
for you, like an hour off.
424
00:16:17,868 --> 00:16:19,167
Good.
425
00:16:19,200 --> 00:16:21,901
Yeah, um, actually,
there's nothing wrong with me.
426
00:16:21,934 --> 00:16:24,834
I'm only here to prove
to a certain person that I'm okay.
427
00:16:24,868 --> 00:16:26,534
I see.
428
00:16:26,567 --> 00:16:31,167
So, um, if you don't mind,
could you sign this note?
429
00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:35,400
"I have examined Elaine Nardo
psychologically,
430
00:16:35,434 --> 00:16:38,634
and find her in no need
of treatment whatsoever."
431
00:16:39,701 --> 00:16:41,400
Nice note.
432
00:16:42,534 --> 00:16:46,367
I especially like the
flower in the corner.
433
00:16:46,400 --> 00:16:49,000
So would you sign it?
434
00:16:50,467 --> 00:16:51,901
Now?
435
00:16:51,934 --> 00:16:55,234
Well, uh, you can ask me
a few questions first,
436
00:16:55,267 --> 00:16:57,934
but, uh, it's not
absolutely necessary.
437
00:16:57,968 --> 00:17:03,000
Well, I do have an hour to kill.
438
00:17:03,033 --> 00:17:04,501
And if you leave,
439
00:17:04,534 --> 00:17:07,367
I'll have to read
this article
440
00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:12,033
about what rats did at
the University of Wisconsin.
441
00:17:12,067 --> 00:17:13,501
Unbelievable.
442
00:17:13,534 --> 00:17:16,901
Well, uh, sure, if you don't
mind wasting your time.
443
00:17:16,934 --> 00:17:18,701
Might be fun.
Yeah.
444
00:17:18,734 --> 00:17:21,868
I never did anything
like this before.
445
00:17:21,901 --> 00:17:24,400
So...
446
00:17:24,434 --> 00:17:27,868
so, uh, go ahead,
throw a few ink blots at me.
447
00:17:27,901 --> 00:17:30,000
You want to
hear my dreams?
448
00:17:30,033 --> 00:17:32,067
No?
449
00:17:33,501 --> 00:17:36,767
Uh, do you want me to, uh, uh,
scream or-or pound a pillow?
450
00:17:36,801 --> 00:17:39,734
Admit I'm mad at
my mother or my kids?
451
00:17:39,767 --> 00:17:42,067
Look, I'm sorry
to disappoint you,
452
00:17:42,100 --> 00:17:45,501
but all those therapies,
they're just not for me.
453
00:17:45,534 --> 00:17:46,734
What is?
454
00:17:46,767 --> 00:17:50,868
Well, it's something
kind of radical.
455
00:17:50,901 --> 00:17:52,968
What's it called?
456
00:17:53,000 --> 00:17:54,634
Talking.
457
00:17:54,667 --> 00:17:55,667
( laughs )
458
00:17:55,701 --> 00:17:57,667
Look, I know this
is new for you.
459
00:17:57,701 --> 00:17:59,501
J-Just try and
relax, huh?
460
00:17:59,534 --> 00:18:01,767
Sit down.
Please.
461
00:18:02,767 --> 00:18:04,601
And tell me
about yourself.
462
00:18:04,634 --> 00:18:05,767
( chuckles )
463
00:18:05,801 --> 00:18:07,300
Well, wha-what
do you want to know?
464
00:18:07,334 --> 00:18:09,300
Anything--
I never met you before.
465
00:18:09,334 --> 00:18:10,434
Who are you?
466
00:18:10,467 --> 00:18:13,267
Tell me a typical
Elaine Nardo day.
467
00:18:13,300 --> 00:18:15,200
Well, uh, okay.
468
00:18:15,234 --> 00:18:17,534
Well, you see,
I got this sort of schedule.
469
00:18:17,567 --> 00:18:18,601
I'm very organized.
470
00:18:18,634 --> 00:18:20,567
A sure sign
of mental health, right?
471
00:18:20,601 --> 00:18:21,634
( chuckles )
472
00:18:21,667 --> 00:18:22,634
Right.
473
00:18:22,667 --> 00:18:24,968
So, uh, um, okay,
this is what I do.
474
00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:27,868
I-I, I get up, and I get the
kids ready for school, right,
475
00:18:27,901 --> 00:18:29,467
and then I drop them off
at school.
476
00:18:29,501 --> 00:18:30,734
And I run my errands
477
00:18:30,767 --> 00:18:33,100
or I do laundry,
and I prepare supper.
478
00:18:33,133 --> 00:18:35,400
And then I go to the gallery,
and I work for four hours.
479
00:18:35,434 --> 00:18:36,601
Then I pick up the kids,
480
00:18:36,634 --> 00:18:38,434
and then we kind of spend
some time together.
481
00:18:38,467 --> 00:18:40,067
You know, I help them
with their homework
482
00:18:40,100 --> 00:18:42,234
or I give them a bath
or whatever, and I make supper.
483
00:18:42,267 --> 00:18:44,033
And then when
the baby-sitter comes,
484
00:18:44,067 --> 00:18:47,067
I go to the garage and take out
a cab and drive all night.
485
00:18:47,100 --> 00:18:48,968
And, uh, and that's all.
486
00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:51,400
Wow.
487
00:18:51,434 --> 00:18:53,767
I know it sounds like a lot,
488
00:18:53,801 --> 00:18:54,968
but, you know,
once you get...
489
00:18:55,000 --> 00:18:56,501
How long have you
been doing this?
490
00:18:56,534 --> 00:18:58,367
A little over a year.
491
00:18:58,400 --> 00:18:59,667
Wow.
492
00:18:59,701 --> 00:19:02,634
No, I-I-I know it
sounds a bit much,
493
00:19:02,667 --> 00:19:04,834
but, uh,
it's not all work.
494
00:19:04,868 --> 00:19:07,334
You see, every day I make sure
that I set aside
495
00:19:07,367 --> 00:19:09,901
a certain amount of time
just to pamper myself.
496
00:19:09,934 --> 00:19:11,934
I bet all of five minutes.
497
00:19:11,968 --> 00:19:14,601
Oh, sometimes twice that.
498
00:19:14,634 --> 00:19:16,501
Wow.
499
00:19:16,534 --> 00:19:19,634
Look, you don't have
to tell me I'm busy.
500
00:19:19,667 --> 00:19:22,033
See, I know I'm busy,
but, uh...
501
00:19:22,067 --> 00:19:24,100
but what choice
have I got?
502
00:19:24,133 --> 00:19:27,467
See, I can't give up
the gallery, because, uh,
503
00:19:27,501 --> 00:19:28,934
I really love it there,
504
00:19:28,968 --> 00:19:31,100
and, and I'm just starting
to grow.
505
00:19:31,133 --> 00:19:33,868
And, uh, I can't give up
the garage, either,
506
00:19:33,901 --> 00:19:36,033
'cause I need the money.
507
00:19:36,067 --> 00:19:39,501
So, uh, I guess I'll just
have to give up the kids.
508
00:19:39,534 --> 00:19:42,000
Wow.
509
00:19:42,033 --> 00:19:45,501
Look, no more
"wows," okay?
510
00:19:45,534 --> 00:19:48,701
Look, I don't need
anybody's help.
511
00:19:48,734 --> 00:19:51,934
I'm the kind of person that
other people come to for help.
512
00:19:51,968 --> 00:19:53,767
So I must be
pretty solid, right?
513
00:19:53,801 --> 00:19:57,400
I mean, the kids come
to me and, and the guys.
514
00:19:57,434 --> 00:20:01,033
Yeah, it gets to be
a bit much, you know, uh...
515
00:20:01,067 --> 00:20:03,067
I-I mean, you don't know
what it's like,
516
00:20:03,100 --> 00:20:05,367
everybody coming to you
with their problems.
517
00:20:08,367 --> 00:20:10,400
And, and sometimes
I'll admit
518
00:20:10,434 --> 00:20:13,567
that I, I feel like getting in
my cab, you know, and...
519
00:20:13,601 --> 00:20:15,901
and just driving and driving
and driving
520
00:20:15,934 --> 00:20:18,601
and, and going someplace
where nobody knows me
521
00:20:18,634 --> 00:20:21,734
and, and nobody wants anything
from me, and...
522
00:20:21,767 --> 00:20:23,868
'Cause I just...
I just get so tired
523
00:20:23,901 --> 00:20:26,934
( voice breaking ):
of being a grownup, you know?
524
00:20:26,968 --> 00:20:29,400
And I've been doing it
since I was eight years old,
525
00:20:29,434 --> 00:20:31,834
'cause I had like three
little brothers, you know,
526
00:20:31,868 --> 00:20:35,734
and they used to come
to me all the time.
527
00:20:35,767 --> 00:20:37,934
And, you know, sometimes...
528
00:20:37,968 --> 00:20:41,901
sometimes I think
I just can't go on another day.
529
00:20:41,934 --> 00:20:44,767
Oh, God, the nights aren't easy.
530
00:20:44,801 --> 00:20:47,167
( sobbing )
531
00:20:49,601 --> 00:20:53,100
Oh, God, you must think
I'm in bad shape.
532
00:20:53,133 --> 00:20:55,200
No, not really.
533
00:20:55,234 --> 00:20:57,367
Good, then sign
the note.
534
00:20:57,400 --> 00:20:58,968
( sobs )
535
00:21:16,567 --> 00:21:19,167
Hey, Elaine.
536
00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:20,200
Hi.
537
00:21:20,234 --> 00:21:21,901
I haven't seen
you in a while.
538
00:21:21,934 --> 00:21:23,501
Huh, ever since
you've been, uh,
539
00:21:23,534 --> 00:21:24,834
going to the
psychiatrist--
540
00:21:24,868 --> 00:21:26,300
what was it,
two weeks, huh?
541
00:21:26,334 --> 00:21:27,734
Yeah.
How've you been doing, huh?
542
00:21:27,767 --> 00:21:30,033
Well, uh, i-i-it's, uh,
kind of hard to tell.
543
00:21:30,067 --> 00:21:32,067
I've only seen him
ten times.
544
00:21:32,100 --> 00:21:33,467
Oh?
545
00:21:33,501 --> 00:21:34,834
But I like him.
546
00:21:34,868 --> 00:21:37,167
As a matter of fact, I'm late
for an appointment right now.
547
00:21:37,200 --> 00:21:38,267
Oh.
548
00:21:38,300 --> 00:21:40,167
But, uh, but I've
been missing you,
549
00:21:40,200 --> 00:21:41,901
and, uh, I wanted to talk.
550
00:21:41,934 --> 00:21:42,801
Yeah, sure, sure.
551
00:21:42,834 --> 00:21:44,701
This is kind
of hard for me.
552
00:21:44,734 --> 00:21:45,934
Ha! Let me start.
553
00:21:45,968 --> 00:21:47,868
Nice dress.
554
00:21:47,901 --> 00:21:49,868
( chuckles ):
Thanks.
555
00:21:49,901 --> 00:21:52,133
Um, Alex, uh...
556
00:21:52,167 --> 00:21:53,701
Yeah?
557
00:21:53,734 --> 00:21:56,367
Do you remember the conversation
we had that night in the cab?
558
00:21:56,400 --> 00:21:58,501
Uh, you mean,
when you said, uh,
559
00:21:58,534 --> 00:22:00,501
"Alex, be honest with me.
What are you afraid of?"
560
00:22:00,534 --> 00:22:03,100
And I said, "I'm afraid
you're just doing this maybe unconsciously
561
00:22:03,133 --> 00:22:04,934
"because you don't want
to deal with the fact
562
00:22:04,968 --> 00:22:06,300
that, uh, you need
help right now."
563
00:22:06,334 --> 00:22:08,167
And you said, "I love it
when a man accuses me
564
00:22:08,200 --> 00:22:09,567
of unconsciously
avoiding therapy."
565
00:22:09,601 --> 00:22:11,334
And then I said, "Don't
give me a hard time.
566
00:22:11,367 --> 00:22:14,334
It's not like part of
me doesn't want to"?
567
00:22:14,367 --> 00:22:15,334
Yeah.
568
00:22:15,367 --> 00:22:17,400
Vaguely.
569
00:22:17,434 --> 00:22:21,267
Well, uh, I just wanted
to tell you that you were right,
570
00:22:21,300 --> 00:22:24,400
that, that it was my way
of, uh, avoiding my problems,
571
00:22:24,434 --> 00:22:27,434
and that, and that this wouldn't
be the right time
572
00:22:27,467 --> 00:22:30,667
to get involved
in a physical relationship.
573
00:22:30,701 --> 00:22:33,501
And I want to thank you
for, for realizing that.
574
00:22:33,534 --> 00:22:35,534
Thanks.
575
00:22:38,734 --> 00:22:39,834
Hey, listen, I'm just glad
576
00:22:39,868 --> 00:22:41,901
that one of us had
the sense to stop
577
00:22:41,934 --> 00:22:43,300
before we did something
578
00:22:43,334 --> 00:22:45,734
that we would have
both remembered fondly
579
00:22:45,767 --> 00:22:47,367
for the rest of our lives.
580
00:22:48,667 --> 00:22:50,234
( laughs )
581
00:22:51,467 --> 00:22:52,434
Oh, thanks again.
582
00:22:52,467 --> 00:22:53,934
Ciao.
Bye.
583
00:23:10,868 --> 00:23:12,868
Hi, Latka.
584
00:23:13,868 --> 00:23:15,834
Oh, Elaine...
585
00:23:15,868 --> 00:23:17,667
Uh, I heard
586
00:23:17,701 --> 00:23:20,501
you are seeing
a podiatrist.
587
00:23:20,534 --> 00:23:23,567
You know,
I am... I seeing one, too.
588
00:23:23,601 --> 00:23:25,067
Oh, no, no, no, Latka.
589
00:23:25,100 --> 00:23:26,834
I'm seeing a psychiatrist.
590
00:23:26,868 --> 00:23:30,501
A-A podiatrist is a doctor
that takes care of your feet.
591
00:23:30,534 --> 00:23:33,834
Oh, so that's...
592
00:23:33,868 --> 00:23:36,133
that's why.
593
00:23:36,167 --> 00:23:37,567
That's...
What?
594
00:23:37,601 --> 00:23:41,467
Oh, because I told him
I was having bad dreams,
595
00:23:41,501 --> 00:23:44,501
so he told me
to wear looser shoes.
596
00:23:44,534 --> 00:23:46,033
Oh.
597
00:23:46,067 --> 00:23:48,267
A-And you know, it worked.
598
00:23:52,567 --> 00:23:54,834
Boy, this is a great country.
599
00:24:00,767 --> 00:24:04,234
( theme music playing )
600
00:24:27,801 --> 00:24:29,200
WOMAN:
Night, Mr. Walters.
601
00:24:29,234 --> 00:24:30,767
( grunts )
602
00:24:30,817 --> 00:24:35,367
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