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Gomer Pyle - USMC.
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Starring Jim Nabors
as Gomer Pyle.
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00:00:17,334 --> 00:00:20,535
Also starring Frank
Sutton as Sergeant Carter.
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00:00:29,763 --> 00:00:33,198
Hut, hut, hut, left!
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00:00:34,034 --> 00:00:35,333
Turn!
6
00:00:36,303 --> 00:00:37,902
Company, halt!
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00:00:37,971 --> 00:00:39,204
Fall out!
8
00:00:39,273 --> 00:00:40,550
All right, all
right! Spread out!
9
00:00:40,574 --> 00:00:42,674
Move around here.
10
00:00:42,742 --> 00:00:45,944
Now, this morning's
field exercise,
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individual scouting.
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00:00:47,814 --> 00:00:49,325
Remember, a good scout knows
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00:00:49,349 --> 00:00:51,061
cover, concealment, camouflage,
14
00:00:51,085 --> 00:00:52,525
and principles of movement.
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00:00:52,586 --> 00:00:53,952
He also knows...
16
00:00:55,456 --> 00:00:56,888
Where's the phone?
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00:00:58,925 --> 00:01:00,158
Pyle!
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00:01:03,364 --> 00:01:04,663
What took you so long?
19
00:01:04,732 --> 00:01:07,310
Well, sir... I was
just telling these men
20
00:01:07,334 --> 00:01:08,511
the things that
make a good scout,
21
00:01:08,535 --> 00:01:10,113
and pokiness ain't
one of them. Yes, sir.
22
00:01:10,137 --> 00:01:11,848
Do you know the things
that do make a good scout?
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00:01:11,872 --> 00:01:13,439
Yes, sir.
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00:01:13,507 --> 00:01:16,875
A good scout is trustworthy,
loyal, helpful, friendly,
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00:01:16,944 --> 00:01:19,628
courteous, kind, cheerful,
obedient, and thrifty...
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00:01:19,696 --> 00:01:20,745
Pyle!
27
00:01:20,814 --> 00:01:23,248
A Boy Scout is also
brave, clean, and reverent.
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00:01:23,317 --> 00:01:25,428
And they salute like
this, with three fingers.
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00:01:25,452 --> 00:01:28,136
Are you kidding me?
Are you putting me on?
30
00:01:28,205 --> 00:01:31,839
Oh, no, sir. I was in troop
437, Mayberry branch.
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00:01:31,908 --> 00:01:34,509
I wasn't talking
about Boy Scouts.
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00:01:34,578 --> 00:01:37,662
I'm talking about
scouting, Marine scouting!
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00:01:37,731 --> 00:01:40,165
Now, that's a
different thing entire.
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00:01:40,234 --> 00:01:41,444
Oh, it is?
35
00:01:41,468 --> 00:01:42,567
Yes, sir.
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00:01:42,636 --> 00:01:44,036
Scoutin' and patrollin',
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00:01:44,104 --> 00:01:45,916
chapter 16 in the
Marine Guidebook.
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00:01:45,940 --> 00:01:48,151
That's the part where you're
supposed to know about cover,
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00:01:48,175 --> 00:01:50,875
concealment, camouflage,
and the principle of movement.
40
00:01:50,945 --> 00:01:53,845
Now, that's a altogether
different thing from Boy Scoutin'.
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00:01:53,914 --> 00:01:56,348
You see, a Boy Scout
is trustworthy, loyal...
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00:01:56,417 --> 00:01:57,816
Knock it off!
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00:02:00,353 --> 00:02:03,388
Must be for you, Sarge. Not
a soul one knows I'm out here.
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00:02:05,041 --> 00:02:07,743
Hello. This here's
Gomer Pyle talkin'.
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You wanna talk to the Sergeant?
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00:02:08,912 --> 00:02:10,912
He's standin' right
here at the side of me.
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00:02:12,983 --> 00:02:15,951
Alpha checkpoint,
Sergeant Carter.
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00:02:16,019 --> 00:02:18,386
Eh, yes, sir. We're
just about to begin.
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00:02:19,689 --> 00:02:21,489
Sir?
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00:02:21,558 --> 00:02:23,878
Oh, that was just
one of the men who...
51
00:02:25,362 --> 00:02:26,628
Yes, sir.
52
00:02:27,397 --> 00:02:28,663
I'll tell him.
53
00:02:35,105 --> 00:02:37,538
And there's a string of
telephone poles along there,
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00:02:37,607 --> 00:02:39,207
from D12 to F9.
55
00:02:39,276 --> 00:02:41,143
Uh-huh. Any military vehicles?
56
00:02:41,211 --> 00:02:42,510
No. No vehicles, sir.
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00:02:42,579 --> 00:02:44,045
Okay.
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00:02:44,114 --> 00:02:46,347
Where's Pyle now?
Everybody else is here.
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00:02:46,416 --> 00:02:47,493
Sir.
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00:02:47,517 --> 00:02:48,583
Huh?
61
00:02:54,208 --> 00:02:55,473
Good afternoon, sir.
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00:02:55,542 --> 00:02:57,382
How's your scouting
exercise going, Sergeant?
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00:02:57,410 --> 00:02:59,655
Very good, sir. All checked
out except one man.
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00:02:59,679 --> 00:03:01,708
Yoo-hoo, Sergeant!
It's me, Gomer!
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00:03:01,732 --> 00:03:03,031
I'm back!
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00:03:03,100 --> 00:03:04,711
I'll be down there in a minute.
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00:03:04,735 --> 00:03:06,034
Be right there.
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00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:16,828
Did you know it was me
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00:03:16,897 --> 00:03:18,708
with all this plant
life on my helmet?
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00:03:18,732 --> 00:03:20,610
I found these buttercups
and daisies up there
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00:03:20,634 --> 00:03:23,468
while I was lookin' for
some camouflage branches.
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00:03:23,537 --> 00:03:25,070
I picked 'em for your desk.
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00:03:25,138 --> 00:03:26,449
I thought they'd
look real pretty.
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00:03:26,473 --> 00:03:28,267
Things look so
drab in that office.
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00:03:28,291 --> 00:03:30,411
Let's see if you
like your butter.
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00:03:32,863 --> 00:03:35,063
Drop 'em! Drop 'em!
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00:03:35,131 --> 00:03:37,265
Was this one of the men
on the scouting exercise?
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00:03:37,334 --> 00:03:40,068
Uh, yes, sir. Uh, he
was just reporting in.
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00:03:40,136 --> 00:03:41,569
Weren't you, Pyle?
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00:03:41,638 --> 00:03:43,121
Yes, sir.
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00:03:43,190 --> 00:03:44,906
Well, report in.
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00:03:45,709 --> 00:03:47,175
Well, sir...
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00:03:47,244 --> 00:03:49,444
There's a right nice
stretch of land over yonder.
84
00:03:49,512 --> 00:03:51,446
Alfalfa's comin' up fair.
85
00:03:51,514 --> 00:03:53,815
Melons would grow
real good there, though.
86
00:03:53,884 --> 00:03:55,283
Soil is kind of sandy.
87
00:03:55,352 --> 00:03:57,869
It's not too salty. I tasted it.
88
00:03:57,937 --> 00:04:00,138
And there's a whole
string of bushes
89
00:04:00,206 --> 00:04:03,041
along the path from F2 to H4.
90
00:04:03,109 --> 00:04:06,228
But they're just awful bushes,
they're just full of stickers.
91
00:04:06,296 --> 00:04:09,648
And there was a telephone
pole by the side of the highway
92
00:04:09,716 --> 00:04:12,216
with a poster tacked
up. It said, uh...
93
00:04:13,186 --> 00:04:15,720
"Mayfair theatre, tonight,
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00:04:15,789 --> 00:04:18,557
"Ma and Pa Kettle in Hawaii,
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00:04:18,625 --> 00:04:20,525
"selected short subjects,
96
00:04:20,594 --> 00:04:23,211
"and Thursday
night's family night."
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00:04:23,280 --> 00:04:25,863
Sergeant, can I have a
word with you, please?
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00:04:28,968 --> 00:04:30,502
Sergeant, that is
the poorest excuse
99
00:04:30,570 --> 00:04:31,914
for a scout I've seen yet.
100
00:04:31,938 --> 00:04:33,571
Yes, sir.
101
00:04:33,640 --> 00:04:34,506
I would suggest a
little more lecture time
102
00:04:34,574 --> 00:04:35,934
on scouting and patrolling.
103
00:04:35,975 --> 00:04:37,687
Maybe you could
use a little yourself.
104
00:04:37,711 --> 00:04:38,951
Yes, sir.
105
00:04:39,513 --> 00:04:40,779
Carry on.
106
00:04:47,621 --> 00:04:49,454
All right, you people.
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00:04:49,523 --> 00:04:51,567
I was gonna give
you all liberty tonight,
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00:04:51,591 --> 00:04:54,192
provided nobody
fouled-up on this exercise.
109
00:04:54,260 --> 00:04:58,162
Well, one man fouled-up,
so the liberty is canceled.
110
00:04:58,231 --> 00:05:00,332
That's just terrible, sir.
111
00:05:00,400 --> 00:05:02,500
Not to embarrass the
man, but who was it?
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00:05:02,569 --> 00:05:04,535
You, Pyle! The man was you!
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00:05:04,604 --> 00:05:05,903
Me, sir?
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00:05:05,973 --> 00:05:08,273
You! Pyle, you violated all
the principles of movement
115
00:05:08,342 --> 00:05:09,507
on your scouting mission!
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00:05:09,576 --> 00:05:11,187
You were strolling
around, picking daisies
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00:05:11,211 --> 00:05:12,721
and looking at movie posters.
118
00:05:12,745 --> 00:05:14,523
You blew it! But, sir...
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00:05:14,547 --> 00:05:16,464
You blew it, Pyle! You
blew it for everybody!
120
00:05:16,533 --> 00:05:18,333
I just feel terrible, sir.
121
00:05:18,401 --> 00:05:20,680
Do all the men have to
suffer on account of me?
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00:05:20,704 --> 00:05:22,370
That's right. That was the deal.
123
00:05:22,439 --> 00:05:24,672
One foul-up, and
the liberty was off.
124
00:05:24,741 --> 00:05:26,274
And what did you do?
125
00:05:26,343 --> 00:05:27,508
I blew it, sir.
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00:05:27,577 --> 00:05:28,977
Right.
127
00:05:29,046 --> 00:05:30,979
All right, everybody, fall in.
128
00:05:41,291 --> 00:05:43,825
Daisies he picks
for me, daisies!
129
00:05:43,893 --> 00:05:45,226
Where do they find them?
130
00:05:45,295 --> 00:05:47,662
I had to cancel liberty
for the whole platoon.
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00:05:47,731 --> 00:05:50,765
You know what he needs?
A good rap on the head,
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00:05:50,834 --> 00:05:53,335
something that might jar
something loose upstairs.
133
00:05:53,403 --> 00:05:54,686
Yeah, I know what you mean.
134
00:05:54,754 --> 00:05:56,266
Everything all right, fellas?
135
00:05:56,290 --> 00:05:58,034
Oh, hi, Hannah.
Great. How are you?
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00:06:00,294 --> 00:06:02,043
Ow! Hannah, it hurts!
137
00:06:02,112 --> 00:06:03,311
You know the company rules,
138
00:06:03,380 --> 00:06:04,980
"You can look but don't touch."
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00:06:05,048 --> 00:06:06,343
I'm sorry. I lost my head.
140
00:06:08,869 --> 00:06:11,102
Oh! It kills me the way
she does that, you know.
141
00:06:11,171 --> 00:06:12,631
How'd you like to
be married to that?
142
00:06:12,655 --> 00:06:15,173
Who, the Dragon
Lady? I don't think so.
143
00:06:15,242 --> 00:06:16,819
Better not let her
hear you call her that.
144
00:06:16,843 --> 00:06:17,859
She'll kill you.
145
00:06:17,928 --> 00:06:19,660
And she can do it too, Benson.
146
00:06:19,729 --> 00:06:21,512
I think she could take you.
147
00:06:21,581 --> 00:06:23,421
Not if I trained for
a couple months.
148
00:06:28,471 --> 00:06:31,222
No. Look, would you just let up?
149
00:06:31,291 --> 00:06:33,024
He must be new around here.
150
00:06:33,093 --> 00:06:35,126
He's gonna get
learned real fast.
151
00:06:38,615 --> 00:06:39,748
Let's go.
152
00:06:47,907 --> 00:06:50,275
Hey, guys, check it out!
153
00:06:52,011 --> 00:06:53,578
You want a rematch?
154
00:06:55,014 --> 00:06:56,614
Out.
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00:06:59,920 --> 00:07:01,964
Now, why couldn't that
have been Pyle, huh?
156
00:07:01,988 --> 00:07:04,489
Flyin' through
the air like that.
157
00:07:04,558 --> 00:07:06,918
You'd like that, wouldn't you?
158
00:07:07,610 --> 00:07:09,010
Why can't it be Pyle?
159
00:07:09,079 --> 00:07:11,212
What are you talking about?
160
00:07:11,281 --> 00:07:13,481
We'll set him up against Hannah.
161
00:07:13,550 --> 00:07:15,616
Oh, how I'd love to see that.
162
00:07:15,686 --> 00:07:16,926
How are you gonna set him up?
163
00:07:17,805 --> 00:07:21,239
Look, don't worry
about it. I'll set him up.
164
00:07:21,308 --> 00:07:24,176
I'll fix it. I'll fix
it real good.
165
00:07:24,227 --> 00:07:26,861
How come we got
our liberty back, huh?
166
00:07:26,930 --> 00:07:29,597
You know what I think?
I'll tell you what I think.
167
00:07:29,666 --> 00:07:31,744
I think the Sergeant's
just bein' nice to us,
168
00:07:31,768 --> 00:07:33,001
is what I think.
169
00:07:33,070 --> 00:07:36,137
He never does
stay mad at us long.
170
00:07:36,206 --> 00:07:38,940
You know what else I
think? I'll tell you what I think.
171
00:07:39,009 --> 00:07:41,309
I think we ought to go tell
him how nice it is of him.
172
00:07:41,378 --> 00:07:43,144
No, Gomer. You
fouled us up yesterday
173
00:07:43,213 --> 00:07:45,491
and made us lose the liberty.
We got it back by a miracle
174
00:07:45,515 --> 00:07:47,815
and we ain't gonna
let you foul us up again.
175
00:07:47,884 --> 00:07:49,495
Well, I sure am
sorry about yesterday.
176
00:07:49,519 --> 00:07:51,286
Honest, I am.
177
00:07:51,354 --> 00:07:53,148
Look, in 30 minutes, we'll
be on that bus into town.
178
00:07:53,172 --> 00:07:55,590
Do you think you can stay
out of trouble just that long?
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00:07:55,658 --> 00:07:57,770
I sure don't mean
to get in no trouble.
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00:07:57,794 --> 00:08:00,795
Good. Don't do anything,
don't say anything.
181
00:08:00,864 --> 00:08:02,075
If you say so, Duke.
182
00:08:02,099 --> 00:08:03,882
Ten-hut!
183
00:08:03,950 --> 00:08:05,016
As you were.
184
00:08:05,084 --> 00:08:07,084
All right, two things.
185
00:08:07,153 --> 00:08:10,472
First, transportation will
leave the main gate at 1730.
186
00:08:10,540 --> 00:08:11,806
Hey. Great. Yeah.
187
00:08:11,875 --> 00:08:14,409
And second, since this
is your first liberty in town,
188
00:08:14,478 --> 00:08:16,978
we gotta observe
a certain tradition.
189
00:08:17,046 --> 00:08:19,581
Every man will put
his ID Card in this hat,
190
00:08:19,650 --> 00:08:20,815
and the name I draw
191
00:08:20,884 --> 00:08:22,528
will represent this
particular company.
192
00:08:22,552 --> 00:08:24,363
What's it all about,
Sarge? What's the tradition?
193
00:08:24,387 --> 00:08:26,988
We have this tradition that
one man from each company
194
00:08:27,057 --> 00:08:29,624
collects his first liberty
kiss from Miss Hannah Troy.
195
00:08:29,692 --> 00:08:30,608
Who's she?
196
00:08:30,677 --> 00:08:32,109
She runs a tavern in town.
197
00:08:32,179 --> 00:08:34,245
Come on, let's
go, let's go, let's go.
198
00:08:34,314 --> 00:08:36,214
Come on, come on, come on.
199
00:08:36,283 --> 00:08:37,848
Pyle, Pyle, Pyle.
200
00:08:37,917 --> 00:08:40,229
I think I'll pass up
the drawin', Sergeant.
201
00:08:40,253 --> 00:08:41,352
What?
202
00:08:41,421 --> 00:08:43,332
Let somebody else
have my chance.
203
00:08:43,356 --> 00:08:45,956
But you can't. I mean, it's...
204
00:08:46,025 --> 00:08:47,836
It's gotta be
representative. But...
205
00:08:47,860 --> 00:08:49,394
Pyle, it's tradition.
206
00:08:49,462 --> 00:08:51,607
You going against
tradition? Well...
207
00:08:51,631 --> 00:08:53,130
Of course not.
208
00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:56,401
There's nothing more sacred
in the Marines than tradition.
209
00:08:56,469 --> 00:08:59,770
Good. Now everybody's in.
210
00:08:59,839 --> 00:09:02,740
Now for the drawing.
For the tradition.
211
00:09:03,876 --> 00:09:06,678
All right. Give me
some room. Some room.
212
00:09:08,815 --> 00:09:11,115
The winner is...
213
00:09:11,184 --> 00:09:13,984
Gomer Pyle. And what
do you think of that?
214
00:09:14,053 --> 00:09:16,120
And you were the one
that weren't even interested.
215
00:09:16,189 --> 00:09:19,557
Congratulations, Pyle. Now
here's the way the tradition
216
00:09:19,626 --> 00:09:22,327
of the first liberty kiss
works. But, Sergeant...
217
00:09:22,395 --> 00:09:24,128
You just go up to
her and you say,
218
00:09:24,197 --> 00:09:27,832
"Dragon Lady, I'm here for
my first liberty kiss." But, sir...
219
00:09:27,900 --> 00:09:30,602
It'll be a moment
you will never forget.
220
00:09:30,670 --> 00:09:31,802
All right, Pyle, now,
221
00:09:31,871 --> 00:09:34,171
I'll see you tonight at
Hannah's Bar & Grill.
222
00:09:34,241 --> 00:09:37,086
That's on Exchange
Street. Is that clear? Yes, sir.
223
00:09:37,110 --> 00:09:39,009
All right, now. You be there.
224
00:09:40,813 --> 00:09:44,449
But, sir... You
lucky stiff. Free kiss.
225
00:09:47,053 --> 00:09:48,787
I just can't do it.
226
00:09:49,322 --> 00:09:50,421
What?
227
00:09:52,358 --> 00:09:53,691
I just can't do it.
228
00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:56,060
I just couldn't up and
kiss some strange girl.
229
00:09:56,129 --> 00:09:58,412
Why, we ain't done no
steppin' out or courtin'.
230
00:09:58,498 --> 00:10:00,342
This is different,
Gomer. It's just a kiss.
231
00:10:00,366 --> 00:10:02,533
But I don't even know
her folks or nothin'.
232
00:10:02,602 --> 00:10:04,769
You don't have to
kiss her folks, just her.
233
00:10:04,838 --> 00:10:06,488
Oh, I just couldn't.
234
00:10:06,556 --> 00:10:08,868
Why, back home, we'd go
callin' for a whole summer
235
00:10:08,892 --> 00:10:11,693
before we'd even get to bitin'
on the same apple together.
236
00:10:11,762 --> 00:10:13,562
Besides, I did make other plans.
237
00:10:13,629 --> 00:10:16,898
Ever since I seen that movie
poster on the telephone pole,
238
00:10:16,966 --> 00:10:19,111
I've been lookin' forward
to goin' to the picture show
239
00:10:19,135 --> 00:10:21,102
to see Ma and Pa
Kettle in Hawaii.
240
00:10:21,171 --> 00:10:22,765
We've been stuck
in training for months,
241
00:10:22,789 --> 00:10:23,967
this is your first trip to town,
242
00:10:23,991 --> 00:10:25,907
and you wanna see
Ma and Pa Kettle?
243
00:10:25,976 --> 00:10:27,141
Right.
244
00:10:30,347 --> 00:10:31,858
What's the matter
with you, Gomer?
245
00:10:31,882 --> 00:10:33,614
You got something
against kissing?
246
00:10:33,683 --> 00:10:37,318
Oh, no. I like kissin'.
Kissin' can be fun.
247
00:10:37,387 --> 00:10:39,888
But back home, I went with
Ida Carrington for 11 months
248
00:10:39,956 --> 00:10:41,122
before I kissed her.
249
00:10:41,191 --> 00:10:42,768
Then it took two
hours of coaxin'.
250
00:10:42,792 --> 00:10:43,925
Oh, boy.
251
00:10:43,994 --> 00:10:46,094
I only did it to
stop her coaxin'.
252
00:10:47,663 --> 00:10:48,897
I'm sorry.
253
00:10:48,965 --> 00:10:50,860
I just don't like
strangers kissin'.
254
00:10:50,884 --> 00:10:53,184
That's why I never did
like New Year's Eve.
255
00:10:53,253 --> 00:10:55,386
Come 12:00, and smacko.
256
00:10:55,455 --> 00:10:57,333
Everybody's kissin'
everybody else.
257
00:10:57,357 --> 00:10:58,767
And the next day,
everybody wakes up
258
00:10:58,791 --> 00:11:01,208
with a cold to start
out the new year.
259
00:11:01,278 --> 00:11:02,910
Do you mind if I
take your place?
260
00:11:02,979 --> 00:11:04,345
What?
261
00:11:04,414 --> 00:11:05,858
Well, you were the one
that was picked for the kiss.
262
00:11:05,882 --> 00:11:08,163
Why can't I tell this chick
I'm the one that was picked?
263
00:11:08,217 --> 00:11:10,685
That ain't truthful, Duke.
264
00:11:10,754 --> 00:11:12,853
Suppose I tell
her I'm your proxy?
265
00:11:12,922 --> 00:11:14,855
You're my what? Your proxy.
266
00:11:14,924 --> 00:11:16,857
You appointed me
to collect for you
267
00:11:16,926 --> 00:11:18,393
'cause you couldn't make it.
268
00:11:18,461 --> 00:11:19,605
That's a proxy?
269
00:11:19,629 --> 00:11:21,496
Yeah. How about it?
270
00:11:21,564 --> 00:11:23,564
Well, if you want
to. Oh, I want to.
271
00:11:23,600 --> 00:11:24,910
Okay. Good.
272
00:11:24,934 --> 00:11:26,301
You're gonna be my what?
273
00:11:26,369 --> 00:11:27,535
I'm gonna be your proxy.
274
00:11:28,772 --> 00:11:32,473
Gosh, you know somethin'?
I never had a proxy before.
275
00:11:32,542 --> 00:11:34,902
Shoot, I never even
had a godfather.
276
00:11:35,945 --> 00:11:37,312
When's he comin'?
277
00:11:37,380 --> 00:11:38,680
Oh, any minute.
278
00:11:38,748 --> 00:11:40,915
This is gonna be
beautiful. Beautiful.
279
00:11:49,326 --> 00:11:51,603
That must be her, fellas.
She looks like the boss lady.
280
00:11:52,963 --> 00:11:54,606
Gomer don't know
what he passed up.
281
00:11:56,883 --> 00:11:59,617
Hey, Vince, isn't that one
of your people over there?
282
00:11:59,686 --> 00:12:00,752
Hmm?
283
00:12:02,706 --> 00:12:04,806
Don't wait up for
me tonight, kid.
284
00:12:11,314 --> 00:12:13,514
What's happening, sweetness?
285
00:12:14,884 --> 00:12:16,662
What does that
idiot think he's doing?
286
00:12:16,686 --> 00:12:19,287
He'll ruin everything.
287
00:12:19,355 --> 00:12:21,534
So you're the famous
Dragon Lady, huh?
288
00:12:21,558 --> 00:12:24,958
Well, I'm the famous Duke
Slater, baby, Company B.
289
00:12:25,027 --> 00:12:29,397
They call me LB
for short. Lover Boy.
290
00:12:29,465 --> 00:12:33,201
Old LB is here to collect
his first liberty kiss.
291
00:12:33,269 --> 00:12:36,429
So now that the introductions
are out of the way...
292
00:12:37,273 --> 00:12:39,073
Let's go to the moon, baby.
293
00:12:39,809 --> 00:12:41,225
No, thank you.
294
00:12:41,294 --> 00:12:42,543
Let's go.
295
00:12:44,430 --> 00:12:45,580
Come on.
296
00:12:45,649 --> 00:12:47,014
Oh, dear.
297
00:12:52,388 --> 00:12:54,650
Why does she always
throw them toward us?
298
00:12:54,674 --> 00:12:56,518
Now, we ought to talk to
her. This is like drinking beer
299
00:12:56,542 --> 00:12:58,342
at the wrong end
of a bowling alley.
300
00:12:58,411 --> 00:13:00,444
What'd I do? What'd I do?
301
00:13:00,513 --> 00:13:03,659
You have just been formally
introduced to the Dragon Lady.
302
00:13:03,683 --> 00:13:05,694
What do you think you're
doing? Where's Gomer?
303
00:13:05,718 --> 00:13:07,278
Gomer let me take his place.
304
00:13:07,320 --> 00:13:08,552
He what?
305
00:13:08,621 --> 00:13:10,566
He didn't want to come,
so he let me be his proxy.
306
00:13:10,590 --> 00:13:11,890
His proxy?
307
00:13:11,958 --> 00:13:14,603
Oh, you fixed it! You
fixed it real good! Huh?
308
00:13:14,627 --> 00:13:17,478
That was supposed to be
him stretched out there, pally.
309
00:13:17,547 --> 00:13:19,347
You mean it was a
phony? It was all a setup?
310
00:13:19,382 --> 00:13:21,048
Yeah!
311
00:13:21,117 --> 00:13:23,997
I wanted to see Gomer go
flying trough the air, not you.
312
00:13:24,053 --> 00:13:25,286
Are you happy now?
313
00:13:25,355 --> 00:13:26,687
I'm sorry, Sarge.
314
00:13:26,756 --> 00:13:29,273
Sorry ain't enough! Now
you go get Gomer in here!
315
00:13:29,342 --> 00:13:31,792
That's right! You took all
my fun away! Go get him!
316
00:13:31,861 --> 00:13:33,528
Go get him? Yeah!
317
00:13:33,596 --> 00:13:36,864
Look, don't you wanna see
Gomer go flying through the air?
318
00:13:36,933 --> 00:13:38,365
You're entitled now.
319
00:13:38,435 --> 00:13:41,502
Flying through the...
Oh, yeah! Yeah. Yeah?
320
00:13:41,571 --> 00:13:44,216
Yeah. Good idea, Sarge.
I'll go get him, Sarge. Go! Go!
321
00:13:44,240 --> 00:13:45,472
Go! Go!
322
00:13:45,541 --> 00:13:47,474
Come on, we're gonna get Gomer.
323
00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:55,466
Second floor show, coming up.
324
00:14:03,860 --> 00:14:05,404
Are you sure he
went to the movies?
325
00:14:05,428 --> 00:14:07,172
He probably stayed
to see it twice.
326
00:14:07,196 --> 00:14:08,445
There he is.
327
00:14:10,934 --> 00:14:12,577
Okay. Just follow my lead.
328
00:14:15,438 --> 00:14:17,305
Hey, Duke. Hey, fellas.
329
00:14:17,373 --> 00:14:18,384
Hey, Gomer. Howdy, Gomer.
330
00:14:18,408 --> 00:14:19,941
Are you goin' to
the picture show?
331
00:14:20,009 --> 00:14:21,442
It's a real good one.
332
00:14:21,510 --> 00:14:23,188
I'll go see it with
you again, if you like.
333
00:14:23,212 --> 00:14:25,229
I've seen it twice
already, but I'll go again.
334
00:14:25,298 --> 00:14:27,631
No. I couldn't,
Gome. Not tonight.
335
00:14:27,701 --> 00:14:29,311
I'm just not in the
mood for a picture.
336
00:14:29,335 --> 00:14:31,703
But this'll cheer you up.
It's a real funny picture.
337
00:14:31,771 --> 00:14:33,091
There's one place in the picture
338
00:14:33,139 --> 00:14:35,873
where Ma and Pa Kettle
are rockin' on the front porch.
339
00:14:35,942 --> 00:14:38,259
Well, Pa Kettle, he don't
notice this loose board...
340
00:14:38,327 --> 00:14:40,405
Uh, you're probably wondering
why I don't feel in the mood, Gome.
341
00:14:40,429 --> 00:14:42,796
So, I'll tell you.
It's the Sergeant.
342
00:14:42,865 --> 00:14:44,025
He's hurt.
343
00:14:44,083 --> 00:14:45,283
Very hurt.
344
00:14:45,352 --> 00:14:46,550
Was there an accident?
345
00:14:46,619 --> 00:14:48,452
He's hurt inside.
346
00:14:48,521 --> 00:14:50,921
Because tonight, a Marine
Corps tradition was broken,
347
00:14:50,957 --> 00:14:52,568
and his company
wasn't represented
348
00:14:52,592 --> 00:14:55,626
when the first liberty
kisses were passed out.
349
00:14:55,695 --> 00:14:57,328
He really feels bad, huh?
350
00:14:57,397 --> 00:15:00,198
Very bad. 'Cause
you didn't show up.
351
00:15:00,267 --> 00:15:02,400
But wasn't you gonna
take my place, Duke?
352
00:15:02,468 --> 00:15:04,936
Wasn't you gonna be
my... What do you call it?
353
00:15:05,005 --> 00:15:06,737
Proxy? Yeah, proxy.
354
00:15:06,806 --> 00:15:08,539
Yeah. That's what made it worse.
355
00:15:08,608 --> 00:15:11,141
It absolutely has to be the
man chosen from the hat.
356
00:15:11,210 --> 00:15:12,955
The lady wouldn't kiss a proxy?
357
00:15:12,979 --> 00:15:14,445
Absolutely not.
358
00:15:14,513 --> 00:15:16,592
For years, this tradition
has been faithfully observed,
359
00:15:16,616 --> 00:15:18,415
an unbroken chain until...
360
00:15:19,518 --> 00:15:22,853
Well, until tonight.
That's why he's so sad.
361
00:15:22,922 --> 00:15:25,000
You know tradition means a
lot to Sergeant Carter, Gomer.
362
00:15:25,024 --> 00:15:27,208
It does to me,
too, honest, fellers.
363
00:15:27,277 --> 00:15:29,921
I wouldn't be surprised if he even
transferred out of the shame of it.
364
00:15:29,945 --> 00:15:31,623
Huh, fellas? Yeah.
365
00:15:31,647 --> 00:15:32,897
He might.
366
00:15:32,966 --> 00:15:35,400
Gosh! I didn't realize it
was this big a tradition.
367
00:15:35,468 --> 00:15:36,708
Oh, it is. It is.
368
00:15:36,752 --> 00:15:38,297
Yeah. It's like
West Point, Gome.
369
00:15:38,321 --> 00:15:40,021
You know, the flirtation walk.
370
00:15:40,089 --> 00:15:42,790
Why, it's even bigger than
the Semper Fidelis march.
371
00:15:42,859 --> 00:15:44,225
No foolin'?
372
00:15:44,294 --> 00:15:45,592
No fooling.
373
00:15:46,262 --> 00:15:49,763
But still... To kiss
a strange woman...
374
00:15:49,833 --> 00:15:51,443
Well, the least you can do
is come talk to the Sergeant,
375
00:15:51,467 --> 00:15:53,167
tell him why you can't do it.
376
00:15:53,235 --> 00:15:56,270
Well, I guess I do
owe him that much.
377
00:15:56,338 --> 00:15:59,239
It's bigger than Semper
Fidelis, you really mean it?
378
00:16:00,376 --> 00:16:01,742
It's getting late, Vince.
379
00:16:01,811 --> 00:16:04,611
Do you think your Gomer
Pyle guy is gonna show up?
380
00:16:04,681 --> 00:16:05,980
I don't know.
381
00:16:06,049 --> 00:16:08,582
Hey, hey, hey, isn't that
your pigeon coming in now?
382
00:16:10,870 --> 00:16:12,153
He got him.
383
00:16:12,221 --> 00:16:14,922
Good old Duke, he's made
an old man very happy.
384
00:16:14,990 --> 00:16:16,457
Hey, Sergeant.
385
00:16:16,526 --> 00:16:18,292
I'm sorry about things, sir.
386
00:16:18,361 --> 00:16:20,539
Honest, never wanted
you to go into your shell,
387
00:16:20,563 --> 00:16:21,607
not for a minute.
388
00:16:21,631 --> 00:16:22,780
Huh?
389
00:16:22,849 --> 00:16:24,626
Uh, we told Gomie
you felt real bad
390
00:16:24,650 --> 00:16:26,128
about the tradition
being broken, Sarge,
391
00:16:26,152 --> 00:16:27,863
and you might even transfer out.
392
00:16:27,887 --> 00:16:29,932
You know, because your
company didn't come up with a man
393
00:16:29,956 --> 00:16:31,272
for first liberty kiss?
394
00:16:31,341 --> 00:16:33,507
Oh, yeah.
395
00:16:33,576 --> 00:16:35,609
Yeah. But it could
have been worse.
396
00:16:35,678 --> 00:16:39,646
So, I'll just transfer out,
maybe even leave the Corps.
397
00:16:39,715 --> 00:16:42,416
So what if I put in
18 years of my life?
398
00:16:42,485 --> 00:16:44,752
Through thick and thin,
through war and peace.
399
00:16:44,820 --> 00:16:47,054
So what? I'll leave.
400
00:16:47,123 --> 00:16:49,957
You can't leave the Marine
Corps, sir. You just can't.
401
00:16:50,026 --> 00:16:51,325
Better than have it said that
402
00:16:51,394 --> 00:16:55,095
I was the one who
broke tradition. No!
403
00:16:55,164 --> 00:16:57,965
It's a far, far
better thing I do...
404
00:16:59,035 --> 00:17:00,802
I'll cut out.
405
00:17:00,870 --> 00:17:02,770
I never heard
anything more beautiful
406
00:17:02,839 --> 00:17:04,838
in all my put-togethers.
407
00:17:04,908 --> 00:17:08,643
Pyle, I guess you
don't know me very well.
408
00:17:08,711 --> 00:17:11,879
Call me an old sentimentalist
if you like, but, well...
409
00:17:13,383 --> 00:17:16,617
I'm a fool about tradition.
410
00:17:16,686 --> 00:17:19,387
And when a tradition
is broken, I just, well...
411
00:17:21,090 --> 00:17:22,290
Call me a fool.
412
00:17:22,358 --> 00:17:23,758
Why, I never would.
413
00:17:23,826 --> 00:17:25,493
A fool.
414
00:17:25,561 --> 00:17:27,961
And the only honorable
thing for this fool to do
415
00:17:28,030 --> 00:17:29,463
is to transfer out.
416
00:17:29,532 --> 00:17:31,599
Don't say that,
Sergeant. I'll do it.
417
00:17:31,668 --> 00:17:33,000
What?
418
00:17:33,068 --> 00:17:35,803
I'll collect that there
first liberty kiss.
419
00:17:35,871 --> 00:17:37,338
Now, look, Pyle,
420
00:17:37,407 --> 00:17:40,341
I don't want you to do
anything you don't want to do.
421
00:17:40,410 --> 00:17:43,043
Even though you were
chosen, fair and square,
422
00:17:43,112 --> 00:17:46,280
you still don't have to do
this if you don't want to.
423
00:17:46,349 --> 00:17:48,160
I don't? Well, in that case...
424
00:17:48,184 --> 00:17:50,484
No, I'll just transfer out.
425
00:17:50,553 --> 00:17:51,786
Call me a fool.
426
00:17:51,854 --> 00:17:53,365
I'll do it. I'll do
it. Where is she?
427
00:17:53,389 --> 00:17:54,938
A sentimental fool.
428
00:17:55,007 --> 00:17:56,273
Call me a sentimental...
429
00:17:56,342 --> 00:17:58,442
He'll do it. He'll do it.
430
00:17:59,412 --> 00:18:00,495
You will?
431
00:18:00,563 --> 00:18:01,762
Yes, sir.
432
00:18:01,831 --> 00:18:03,071
Where's she at?
433
00:18:03,099 --> 00:18:04,481
Over there.
434
00:18:07,937 --> 00:18:10,399
It'll be over before you know
it. I can promise you that.
435
00:18:10,423 --> 00:18:12,256
Remember, Gomer,
it's a tradition.
436
00:18:12,324 --> 00:18:14,525
Right. What do I do now?
437
00:18:14,594 --> 00:18:16,438
You just go up to
her and you say,
438
00:18:16,462 --> 00:18:19,363
"Dragon Lady, I'm here
for my first liberty kiss."
439
00:18:19,432 --> 00:18:20,598
And go.
440
00:18:40,820 --> 00:18:42,386
Hey, ma'am.
441
00:18:42,455 --> 00:18:43,821
Hello.
442
00:18:43,890 --> 00:18:46,624
First off, I don't much care
for the name "Dragon Lady,"
443
00:18:46,693 --> 00:18:48,158
so I won't call you that.
444
00:18:48,227 --> 00:18:50,928
And second, it ain't nothin'
personal against you, ma'am,
445
00:18:50,996 --> 00:18:53,664
it's just that my upbringing's
against kissin' strangers.
446
00:18:53,716 --> 00:18:55,349
But it's gotta be done
447
00:18:55,418 --> 00:18:57,699
on account of the Sergeant
over there did spend 18 years
448
00:18:57,753 --> 00:18:59,986
in war and peace, and
through thick and thin.
449
00:19:00,055 --> 00:19:01,633
And if he's a fool
about tradition,
450
00:19:01,657 --> 00:19:03,340
then I ain't gonna
stand in his way.
451
00:19:03,409 --> 00:19:04,575
Joe...
452
00:19:05,845 --> 00:19:08,089
What have you been giving him?
453
00:19:08,113 --> 00:19:10,448
And most of all, since
it is a glorious tradition,
454
00:19:10,516 --> 00:19:12,282
bigger than Semper Fidelis,
455
00:19:12,351 --> 00:19:15,369
it ain't fittin' that one little ol'
person like me stands up against it.
456
00:19:15,438 --> 00:19:17,205
The only thing I ask, ma'am,
457
00:19:17,273 --> 00:19:19,674
is could the kiss be
along the jawbone here?
458
00:19:19,742 --> 00:19:21,382
And that'd make
it friendly and all,
459
00:19:21,444 --> 00:19:22,876
without gettin' too involved,
460
00:19:22,945 --> 00:19:25,479
and it'd be enough to satisfy
the Sergeant over there.
461
00:19:25,548 --> 00:19:29,450
Wait a minute. Now,
let me get this straight.
462
00:19:29,519 --> 00:19:31,151
Um, you want a kiss?
463
00:19:33,756 --> 00:19:35,122
But not for you.
464
00:19:36,626 --> 00:19:38,492
But for your sergeant.
465
00:19:40,196 --> 00:19:41,356
Uh-huh.
466
00:19:45,701 --> 00:19:47,134
Come with me.
467
00:19:51,006 --> 00:19:52,451
They're going into the backroom.
468
00:19:52,475 --> 00:19:54,119
I won't see him
flyin' through the air.
469
00:19:54,143 --> 00:19:55,954
She's never done that before.
470
00:19:55,978 --> 00:19:58,512
Maybe she's gonna
throw him through the door.
471
00:19:58,581 --> 00:20:00,381
Yeah.
472
00:20:00,450 --> 00:20:02,049
It'll be just as good.
473
00:20:06,872 --> 00:20:08,539
See, I never had no choice.
474
00:20:08,607 --> 00:20:10,708
It was my name that
come out of the hat,
475
00:20:10,776 --> 00:20:11,875
so here I am.
476
00:20:11,944 --> 00:20:13,444
But you went to the movies
477
00:20:13,512 --> 00:20:15,624
rather than come here
and kiss me, hmm?
478
00:20:15,648 --> 00:20:17,514
Well, you see, it was
Ma and Pa Kettle,
479
00:20:17,583 --> 00:20:18,799
and they're my favorites.
480
00:20:18,867 --> 00:20:22,836
Well, I guess I'm no
match for Ma and Pa Kettle.
481
00:20:22,905 --> 00:20:25,539
Oh, no, ma'am.
Don't get me wrong.
482
00:20:25,608 --> 00:20:27,586
Most fellers would
fall all over theirselves
483
00:20:27,610 --> 00:20:29,876
for a chance to kiss
a pretty girl like you.
484
00:20:29,945 --> 00:20:31,378
But, well, you see,
485
00:20:31,447 --> 00:20:34,315
that's the way I was brought up.
486
00:20:34,383 --> 00:20:35,932
And I can't change.
487
00:20:37,002 --> 00:20:38,969
Oh, I hope you never do.
488
00:20:41,624 --> 00:20:43,557
It's awful quiet in there.
489
00:20:43,626 --> 00:20:45,659
Well, maybe she's
toying with him,
490
00:20:45,728 --> 00:20:47,428
you know, like a
cat with a mouse.
491
00:20:47,496 --> 00:20:48,895
Yeah.
492
00:20:48,964 --> 00:20:50,263
There they are.
493
00:20:50,333 --> 00:20:52,232
He's still in one piece.
494
00:20:53,602 --> 00:20:55,168
Over here.
495
00:20:55,237 --> 00:20:56,603
Come on.
496
00:20:56,972 --> 00:20:58,071
Here.
497
00:20:59,007 --> 00:21:01,007
There. There we are.
498
00:21:02,277 --> 00:21:03,577
Now...
499
00:21:06,666 --> 00:21:08,632
Put your hand up here.
500
00:21:09,268 --> 00:21:10,400
That's right.
501
00:21:10,469 --> 00:21:12,103
Here it comes.
502
00:21:14,040 --> 00:21:16,574
Both arms around me.
503
00:21:17,376 --> 00:21:18,642
That's it.
504
00:21:19,879 --> 00:21:22,713
Now close your eyes.
505
00:21:22,782 --> 00:21:25,816
Oh, come on, Gomer.
It's the tradition.
506
00:22:04,773 --> 00:22:06,813
Well, I done it, Sergeant.
507
00:22:10,312 --> 00:22:11,978
Was it all right?
508
00:22:12,048 --> 00:22:13,248
Huh?
509
00:22:13,315 --> 00:22:15,449
It was fine, just fine.
510
00:22:15,518 --> 00:22:17,467
Gomer, what'd you tell her?
511
00:22:17,536 --> 00:22:20,337
Oh, just about traditions.
512
00:22:21,174 --> 00:22:22,339
Huh?
513
00:22:22,408 --> 00:22:24,219
Oh, you know about
how I was there
514
00:22:24,243 --> 00:22:25,854
to collect my
first liberty kiss.
515
00:22:25,878 --> 00:22:27,718
I explained the
whole thing to her.
516
00:22:27,746 --> 00:22:29,530
She likes it.
517
00:22:29,599 --> 00:22:31,098
She really does.
518
00:22:31,166 --> 00:22:33,267
How about that?
519
00:22:33,336 --> 00:22:34,552
That's it.
520
00:22:34,620 --> 00:22:37,188
That's her weakness. Traditions.
521
00:22:37,256 --> 00:22:39,423
She goes for it.
522
00:22:39,492 --> 00:22:41,158
She must go for it.
523
00:22:44,129 --> 00:22:45,496
What do you know?
524
00:22:53,639 --> 00:22:55,483
You like that
tradition, huh, Hannah?
525
00:22:55,507 --> 00:22:57,041
Oh, it's sweet.
526
00:23:01,480 --> 00:23:03,600
Do you know whose idea that was?
527
00:23:06,318 --> 00:23:07,584
Really?
528
00:23:07,653 --> 00:23:09,386
Mmm-hmm.
529
00:23:09,454 --> 00:23:12,489
I'm just a sentimental
fool, Hannah.
530
00:23:13,258 --> 00:23:14,291
Aw.
531
00:23:17,529 --> 00:23:18,940
Look, if you like
that tradition,
532
00:23:18,964 --> 00:23:20,230
I got another one.
533
00:23:20,299 --> 00:23:21,999
You have? Uh-huh.
534
00:23:22,068 --> 00:23:24,134
On the first liberty night,
535
00:23:24,203 --> 00:23:26,336
the Sergeant gets
some lovin', too.
536
00:23:28,240 --> 00:23:29,706
After all,
537
00:23:29,775 --> 00:23:32,709
I've been around a lot
longer than that private.
538
00:23:32,778 --> 00:23:34,018
Do you know what I mean?
539
00:23:34,046 --> 00:23:35,479
Oh, yeah.
540
00:23:36,182 --> 00:23:37,822
Hmm? Mmm-hmm.
541
00:23:54,867 --> 00:23:56,166
What happened?
542
00:23:56,235 --> 00:23:58,179
You done it all wrong, Sergeant.
543
00:23:58,203 --> 00:24:00,248
You're supposed to put
both arms around her.
544
00:24:00,272 --> 00:24:01,539
That's the tradition.
545
00:24:01,607 --> 00:24:03,151
And you gotta
go by the tradition.
546
00:24:03,175 --> 00:24:05,776
And you didn't keep your eyes
closed the whole time neither.
547
00:24:05,845 --> 00:24:07,489
That's another
part of the tradition.
548
00:24:07,513 --> 00:24:09,257
If you'd have put
both arms around her
549
00:24:09,281 --> 00:24:10,692
and kept your eyes closed,
550
00:24:10,716 --> 00:24:12,594
she'd kiss you real good,
but you didn't do that.
551
00:24:12,618 --> 00:24:13,884
You see, what you done...
552
00:24:16,956 --> 00:24:18,433
Oh, come on now.
Tell us everything,
553
00:24:18,457 --> 00:24:19,790
right from the beginning.
554
00:24:19,858 --> 00:24:20,936
You really want
to hear about it?
555
00:24:20,960 --> 00:24:21,960
Yeah!
556
00:24:22,028 --> 00:24:23,028
Tell us about it.
557
00:24:23,095 --> 00:24:24,295
Right from the beginnin'?
558
00:24:24,330 --> 00:24:25,374
Right from the beginning.
559
00:24:25,398 --> 00:24:28,132
Well, right at the beginnin',
560
00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:31,168
Ma and Pa Kettle was
rockin' on the front porch.
561
00:24:31,237 --> 00:24:33,115
Well, Pa Kettle
didn't take no notice
562
00:24:33,139 --> 00:24:35,050
of this loose board
that was there.
563
00:24:35,074 --> 00:24:37,252
Well, about that
time, he rocked some,
564
00:24:37,276 --> 00:24:40,476
and that board flew up
and hit him right in the face...
40424
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