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1
00:00:03,036 --> 00:00:06,239
♪ I LIKE COFFEE,
TEA'S YOUR BAG ♪
2
00:00:06,339 --> 00:00:08,341
♪ THOUGH IT MAKES
NO SENSE, IT'S TRUE ♪
3
00:00:08,441 --> 00:00:10,710
♪ THERE'S NO ME
WITHOUT YOU ♪
4
00:00:12,512 --> 00:00:14,180
{\an8}THAT MOVIE
WAS INCREDIBLE.
5
00:00:14,280 --> 00:00:16,950
{\an8}MMM, SO GOOD, SO INTENSE.
6
00:00:17,050 --> 00:00:20,754
{\an8}ALL THAT
HOMOEROTIC SUBTEXT, MM.
7
00:00:20,854 --> 00:00:21,888
{\an8}WHAT?
8
00:00:21,988 --> 00:00:23,490
{\an8}OH, COME ON, EDDIE.
9
00:00:23,590 --> 00:00:27,027
{\an8}HUGH JACKMAN TAKES
THE OTHER GUY'S PISTOL,
10
00:00:27,127 --> 00:00:30,130
{\an8}SLIDES IT INTO HIS HOLSTER
IN SLOW MOTION.
11
00:00:30,230 --> 00:00:31,865
{\an8}OH, VERY--COME ON.
HE NEEDED A GUN.
12
00:00:31,965 --> 00:00:35,535
{\an8}IT WAS LATE AT NIGHT.
THEY WERE ALONE
IN THE WOODS,
13
00:00:35,635 --> 00:00:37,971
{\an8}SHARING A CABIN--
OH, MY GOD. WH--
14
00:00:38,071 --> 00:00:38,972
{\an8}[CELL PHONE RINGS]
15
00:00:39,072 --> 00:00:40,507
{\an8}OH.
WHAT THE HELL'S THAT?
16
00:00:40,607 --> 00:00:43,476
{\an8}THAT'S THE CAR.
I HAD IT ALL WIRED UP
17
00:00:43,576 --> 00:00:44,811
{\an8}FOR THAT
HANDS-FREE STUFF.
18
00:00:44,911 --> 00:00:46,279
{\an8}HMM.
LET ME SEE.
19
00:00:46,379 --> 00:00:47,414
{\an8}NO. OK.
20
00:00:47,514 --> 00:00:48,548
{\an8}HELLO.
21
00:00:48,648 --> 00:00:49,816
{\an8}KENNY:
HEY, MAN. IT'S KENNY.
22
00:00:49,916 --> 00:00:50,984
{\an8}HEY, KENNY.
23
00:00:51,084 --> 00:00:52,652
{\an8}JOY'S IN THE CAR.
24
00:00:52,752 --> 00:00:54,788
{\an8}OH, HEY, JOY.
25
00:00:56,122 --> 00:00:57,791
{\an8}HEY, KENNY.
26
00:01:00,026 --> 00:01:01,394
{\an8}SO, WHAT'S UP?
27
00:01:01,494 --> 00:01:03,496
{\an8}UH, GUESS I'M
JUST GONNA SAY HI
28
00:01:03,596 --> 00:01:07,067
{\an8}AND, UH, MAKE SURE
YOU GUYS GOT HOME SAFELY.
29
00:01:07,167 --> 00:01:08,668
{\an8}I GOTTA GO. BYE.
30
00:01:08,768 --> 00:01:10,036
{\an8}ALL RIGHT.
31
00:01:10,136 --> 00:01:11,271
{\an8}BYE.
32
00:01:11,371 --> 00:01:13,907
{\an8}[SIGHS] THANKS FOR
A WONDERFUL EVENING.
33
00:01:14,007 --> 00:01:15,608
{\an8}DATE NIGHT IS
AS EXCITING NOW
34
00:01:15,708 --> 00:01:21,081
{\an8}AS IT WAS BACK
WHEN I WAS TRYING
TO SLEEP WITH YOU.
35
00:01:25,118 --> 00:01:28,321
{\an8}[SPRAYING AEROSOL]
36
00:01:31,191 --> 00:01:32,192
{\an8}WHEW.
37
00:01:32,292 --> 00:01:33,226
{\an8}I GOTTA BE HONEST
WITH YOU,
38
00:01:33,326 --> 00:01:34,627
{\an8}IF WE WERE
TEENAGERS,
39
00:01:34,727 --> 00:01:37,464
{\an8}I WOULD HAVE HAD YOU COME
IN AND LOOK AT THAT.
40
00:01:39,866 --> 00:01:41,801
{\an8}WHEW!
41
00:01:44,737 --> 00:01:48,775
{\an8}IF WE WERE TEENAGERS,
YOU PROBABLY WOULD HAVE
PHOTOGRAPHED IT.
42
00:01:48,875 --> 00:01:50,510
{\an8}HEY, UH,
QUESTION FOR YOU.
43
00:01:50,610 --> 00:01:51,811
{\an8}YES, MY LOVE.
44
00:01:51,911 --> 00:01:54,981
{\an8}WHY DID YOU TELL KENNY
THAT I WAS IN THE CAR
45
00:01:55,081 --> 00:01:57,250
{\an8}WHILE YOU WERE
ON THE SPEAKERPHONE?
46
00:01:57,350 --> 00:01:58,952
WELL, BEFORE I ANSWER,
47
00:01:59,052 --> 00:02:02,322
A-ARE YOU HAPPY OR MAD
THAT I TOLD HIM?
48
00:02:02,422 --> 00:02:03,590
I DON'T KNOW.
49
00:02:03,690 --> 00:02:05,391
IT JUST SOUNDED TO ME
LIKE YOU WERE WORRIED
50
00:02:05,492 --> 00:02:09,062
THAT--THAT HE MIGHT
SAY SOMETHING THAT YOU
DIDN'T WANT ME TO HEAR.
51
00:02:09,162 --> 00:02:10,263
SO...
52
00:02:10,363 --> 00:02:12,232
MAD.
53
00:02:12,332 --> 00:02:13,933
NO, JUST CURIOUS.
54
00:02:14,033 --> 00:02:16,769
BUT--BUT IT'S LIKE
A HOSTILE CURIOSITY?
55
00:02:16,870 --> 00:02:19,272
OH, MY GOD!
JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION.
56
00:02:19,372 --> 00:02:20,406
ALL RIGHT, LOOK. LOOK.
57
00:02:20,507 --> 00:02:21,641
TH-THERE IS NOTHING
58
00:02:21,741 --> 00:02:23,042
THAT I DIDN'T
WANT YOU TO HEAR.
59
00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:25,979
I-IT WAS JUST, UH,
COMMON SPEAKERPHONE
ETIQUETTE,
60
00:02:26,079 --> 00:02:30,450
YOU KNOW, TO--TO INFORM
THE CALLER THAT THERE
ARE PEOPLE PRESENT.
61
00:02:30,550 --> 00:02:32,051
JUST...
UH-HUH.
62
00:02:32,152 --> 00:02:35,522
RIGHT, AND YOU'RE
ALWAYS SO OBSESSED
WITH PROPER ETIQUETTE,
63
00:02:35,622 --> 00:02:38,825
MR. "HEY, SMELL MY BURP."
64
00:02:38,925 --> 00:02:40,827
ALL RIGHT, LOOK--
LOOK AT IT LIKE THIS.
65
00:02:40,927 --> 00:02:42,662
UH, LET'S SAY
YOU WERE INVISIBLE, OK,
66
00:02:42,762 --> 00:02:45,265
AND I TOOK YOU OUT
TO A COCKTAIL PARTY
67
00:02:45,365 --> 00:02:48,601
A-AND I WAS TALKING
TO SOMEONE.
68
00:02:48,701 --> 00:02:50,403
WOULDN'T IT BE RUDE
IF I DIDN'T TELL
MY NEW FRIEND,
69
00:02:50,503 --> 00:02:52,205
"OH, BY THE WAY,
70
00:02:52,305 --> 00:02:54,841
"MY BEAUTIFUL WIFE
IS STANDING
RIGHT NEXT TO ME,
71
00:02:54,941 --> 00:02:56,876
WHO JUST HAPPENS TO
BE INVISIBLE"? IT'S...
72
00:02:56,976 --> 00:02:59,913
ALL RIGHT, FIRST OF ALL,
YOU'VE NEVER TAKEN ME
TO A COCKTAIL PARTY,
73
00:03:00,013 --> 00:03:04,317
VISIBLE, INVISIBLE,
SO I DON'T SEE HOW IT APPLIES.
74
00:03:04,417 --> 00:03:07,453
WELL, I--I JUST THINK
THAT THAT IS A VERY
COLORFUL SCENARIO
75
00:03:07,554 --> 00:03:09,622
TO PROVE MY POINT
QUITE WELL.
76
00:03:09,722 --> 00:03:10,757
WHATEVER.
77
00:03:10,857 --> 00:03:12,725
SO THERE'S NOTHING
THAT YOU'VE DONE
78
00:03:12,825 --> 00:03:14,227
THAT YOU'RE HIDING
FROM ME?
79
00:03:14,327 --> 00:03:15,528
NO.
80
00:03:15,628 --> 00:03:16,930
BECAUSE JUST SO YOU KNOW,
IF YOU DID DO SOMETHING
81
00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:18,398
AND I FIND OUT ABOUT IT,
YOU'RE GONNA BE
82
00:03:18,498 --> 00:03:21,434
IN A LOT MORE TROUBLE
THAN IF YOU JUST TELL ME NOW.
83
00:03:21,534 --> 00:03:23,002
WHAT AM I, 9?
84
00:03:23,102 --> 00:03:24,337
IN MANY WAYS, YES.
85
00:03:24,437 --> 00:03:26,339
OK, I PROMISE YOU
THERE IS NOTHING.
86
00:03:26,439 --> 00:03:28,241
OK. WELL, I'M JUST
TELLING YOU THAT TH--
87
00:03:28,341 --> 00:03:30,843
IF THERE IS SOMETHING,
I WILL FIND OUT ABOUT IT.
88
00:03:30,944 --> 00:03:31,945
OF COURSE YOU WILL.
89
00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:33,880
AND I PLAN ON DOING
SOME DIGGING.
90
00:03:33,980 --> 00:03:34,914
AW, DIG AWAY.
91
00:03:35,014 --> 00:03:36,249
I--OH, I WILL.
92
00:03:36,349 --> 00:03:37,951
OK, GOOD, BECAUSE YOU'RE
NOT GONNA FIND ANYTHING.
93
00:03:38,051 --> 00:03:39,319
I'LL BE THE JUDGE OF THAT.
94
00:03:39,419 --> 00:03:43,089
WELL, THEN I'LL GET YOU
A ROBE AND GAVEL.
95
00:03:43,957 --> 00:03:44,991
GREAT.
96
00:03:45,091 --> 00:03:46,192
FINE.
PERFECT.
97
00:03:46,292 --> 00:03:47,527
I LOVE IT.
98
00:03:47,627 --> 00:03:50,230
I DIDN'T
DO ANYTHING.
99
00:03:50,330 --> 00:03:51,931
WE'LL SEE.
100
00:03:58,137 --> 00:04:01,975
SO, KENNY,
WHAT THE HELL WAS
THAT LAST NIGHT?
101
00:04:02,075 --> 00:04:03,109
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
102
00:04:03,209 --> 00:04:04,377
IN THE CAR
ON THE SPEAKERPHONE.
103
00:04:04,477 --> 00:04:06,012
YOU JUST CALLED
TO SAY HELLO?
104
00:04:06,112 --> 00:04:08,181
I MEAN, THAT GOT
JOY ALL SUSPICIOUS
FOR NO REASON.
105
00:04:08,281 --> 00:04:10,250
I WAS CALLIN' TO SEE
IF YOU SAW THE EAGLE GAME.
106
00:04:10,350 --> 00:04:11,551
SO WHY DIDN'T
YOU SAY THAT?
107
00:04:11,651 --> 00:04:12,885
BECAUSE YOU SAID
JOY'S THERE.
108
00:04:12,986 --> 00:04:14,220
EVERYONE KNOWS
WHEN SOMEONE SAYS,
109
00:04:14,320 --> 00:04:16,189
"MY WIFE'S IN THE CAR,"
YOU DUMMY UP.
110
00:04:16,289 --> 00:04:18,591
BUT SEE, NOW, SHE THINKS
I DID SOMETHIN' WRONG.
111
00:04:18,691 --> 00:04:19,993
DID YOU?
NO.
112
00:04:20,093 --> 00:04:22,262
THEN WHY'D YOU SAY,
"MY WIFE'S IN THE CAR"?
113
00:04:22,362 --> 00:04:23,396
BECAUSE SHE WAS.
114
00:04:23,496 --> 00:04:24,731
I-IT'S SPEAKERPHONE
COURTESY.
115
00:04:24,831 --> 00:04:26,566
NOW SHE'S GONNA
BE LOOKING AROUND
116
00:04:26,666 --> 00:04:28,601
BECAUSE
SHE THINKS I DID
SOMETHING WRONG.
117
00:04:28,701 --> 00:04:30,937
BUT IF YOU
DIDN'T DO ANYTHING,
WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?
118
00:04:31,037 --> 00:04:33,406
IT'S ALWAYS A PROBLEM
IF YOUR WIFE IS
SNIFFIN' AROUND.
119
00:04:33,506 --> 00:04:36,976
EVEN IF THERE'S
NOTHIN' TO FIND, NO GOOD
CAN COME FROM IT.
120
00:04:37,076 --> 00:04:39,279
SHE'S GONNA END UP,
UH, FINDING
A BUSINESS CARD
121
00:04:39,379 --> 00:04:41,247
FROM A LUNCH
I HAD 3 YEARS AGO,
122
00:04:41,347 --> 00:04:44,317
PUT IT TOGETHER WITH
A PIECE OF SAND SHE
FOUND IN MY FLIP-FLOPS,
123
00:04:44,417 --> 00:04:49,222
AND, BOOM, ALL OF
A SUDDEN, I HAVE ANOTHER
FAMILY IN TAHITI.
124
00:04:49,322 --> 00:04:50,456
I TELL YOU
WHAT YOU GOTTA DO.
125
00:04:50,556 --> 00:04:51,724
YOU GOTTA
GIVE HER SOMETHIN'.
126
00:04:51,824 --> 00:04:52,759
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
127
00:04:52,859 --> 00:04:53,893
YOU GOTTA
COP A PLEA.
128
00:04:53,993 --> 00:04:55,228
MAKE UP
SOMETHIN' SMALL.
129
00:04:55,328 --> 00:04:56,663
TELL HER THAT'S WHAT
YOU WERE HIDING.
130
00:04:56,763 --> 00:04:58,064
YOU GET A SLAP
ON THE WRIST.
131
00:04:58,164 --> 00:04:59,132
SHE STOPS
SNIFFIN' AROUND.
132
00:04:59,232 --> 00:05:00,166
CASE CLOSED.
MM-HMM.
133
00:05:00,266 --> 00:05:01,601
OK, THAT'S GOOD.
THAT'S GOOD.
134
00:05:01,701 --> 00:05:04,070
BUT WHAT DO I GIVE HER?
I GOT NOTHIN'.
135
00:05:04,170 --> 00:05:06,639
IS THERE SOMETHIN' FROM
YOUR LIVES I CAN USE?
136
00:05:06,739 --> 00:05:10,009
NOPE. I WAS ALWAYS
TOTALLY HONEST WITH MY WIFE.
137
00:05:10,109 --> 00:05:12,245
THAT'S WHY WE'RE DIVORCED.
138
00:05:12,345 --> 00:05:14,480
ALL RIGHT.
KARL, WHAT DO YOU GOT?
139
00:05:14,580 --> 00:05:16,482
MY WIFE'S
UNDER THE ILLUSION
140
00:05:16,582 --> 00:05:19,686
I'M A PRETTY BIG
WAR HERO.
141
00:05:20,887 --> 00:05:22,522
OK, THAT'S NOT
GONNA WORK, EITHER.
142
00:05:22,622 --> 00:05:27,026
HOW 'BOUT YOU TELL HER
YOU HAD A DREAM ABOUT ONE
OF HER FRIENDS' BOOBIES?
143
00:05:27,126 --> 00:05:28,194
NICE.
[LAUGHS]
144
00:05:28,294 --> 00:05:29,329
HEY. OK.
145
00:05:29,429 --> 00:05:30,663
OK, I LIKE THAT,
BECAUSE THAT'S--
146
00:05:30,763 --> 00:05:32,031
THAT'S SOMETHING
IN THE SUBCONSCIOUS.
147
00:05:32,131 --> 00:05:33,266
THAT'S SOMETHING
I CAN'T CONTROL.
148
00:05:33,366 --> 00:05:34,534
EXACTLY.
149
00:05:34,634 --> 00:05:36,502
AND--AND I COULD SAY
THAT YOU CALLED ME
150
00:05:36,602 --> 00:05:38,171
TO TALK ABOUT THE DREAM
AND I SAID JOY WAS
THERE TO STOP YOU.
151
00:05:38,271 --> 00:05:40,306
THAT'S GOOD,
BUT EVERY GOOD LIE
NEEDS DETAILS.
152
00:05:40,406 --> 00:05:43,543
NOW, WHICH ONE
OF JOY'S FRIENDS HAS
REALLY NICE BOOBS?
153
00:05:43,643 --> 00:05:45,378
WHEW. WOW,
THAT'S A TOUGH ONE.
154
00:05:45,478 --> 00:05:50,483
I MEAN, QUITE FRANKLY,
ANY BOOB I CAN'T SEE
IS A NICE ONE.
155
00:05:50,583 --> 00:05:54,620
UM, I'M GONNA GO
WITH JANE WASSERMAN.
156
00:05:54,721 --> 00:05:55,988
BOOM. DONE.
N-NO. WAIT.
157
00:05:56,089 --> 00:05:57,724
I CAN'T DO THAT.
WHY NOT?
158
00:05:57,824 --> 00:05:59,792
WELL, BECAUSE THAT
MEANS NOW EVERY TIME
I'M AROUND JANE,
159
00:05:59,892 --> 00:06:00,927
I CAN'T LOOK
AT HER BOOBS,
160
00:06:01,027 --> 00:06:02,328
AND AT THIS POINT
IN MY LIFE,
161
00:06:02,428 --> 00:06:05,064
I'M JUST NOT READY
TO GIVE THAT UP.
162
00:06:18,978 --> 00:06:22,782
SO HOW'S
THE SNIFFIN' AROUND GOIN'?
163
00:06:22,882 --> 00:06:24,150
FIND ANYTHING YET?
164
00:06:24,250 --> 00:06:25,318
MM-HMM. MMM.
165
00:06:25,418 --> 00:06:29,021
A GUM WRAPPER,
A MINI GOLF PENCIL,
166
00:06:29,122 --> 00:06:31,424
AND A YARMULKE
IN YOUR SUIT POCKET.
167
00:06:31,524 --> 00:06:33,726
PUTTING SOME THINGS
TOGETHER.
168
00:06:33,826 --> 00:06:35,395
AH, YOU CAN
CALL OFF THE DOGS,
169
00:06:35,495 --> 00:06:39,232
BECAUSE I HAVE
BEEN HIDING SOMETHING.
170
00:06:39,332 --> 00:06:40,700
YOU WERE RIGHT.
171
00:06:40,800 --> 00:06:41,801
I KNEW IT.
172
00:06:41,901 --> 00:06:43,336
WHY DO YOU TRY
TO GET STUFF BY ME?
173
00:06:43,436 --> 00:06:45,138
WHAT--WHAT DID YOU DO?
174
00:06:45,238 --> 00:06:46,806
I-IT'S--YOU KNOW,
I-IT'S REALLY SILLY,
175
00:06:46,906 --> 00:06:48,908
AND I--I SHOULD HAVE
TOLD YOU EARLIER.
176
00:06:49,008 --> 00:06:50,977
IT'S A--OK, YOU KNOW,
L-LAST WEDNESDAY,
177
00:06:51,077 --> 00:06:54,113
WHEN I TOLD YOU
THAT I WAS WORKING LATE?
178
00:06:54,213 --> 00:06:55,148
YEAH.
179
00:06:55,248 --> 00:06:57,216
WELL, I--I WASN'T
WORKING LATE, OK?
180
00:06:57,316 --> 00:07:00,486
KENNY AND I, WE WENT
TO AN INDIAN CASINO,
181
00:07:00,586 --> 00:07:02,155
AND WE PLAYED
A LITTLE POKER,
182
00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:05,858
AND I LOST $42,
AND, UH, TH-THAT WAS IT,
183
00:07:05,958 --> 00:07:07,293
SO IT'S OUT THERE.
184
00:07:07,393 --> 00:07:08,394
SEE?
185
00:07:08,494 --> 00:07:09,762
NOW, WAS THAT SO HARD?
186
00:07:09,862 --> 00:07:12,432
I MEAN, DOESN'T THAT
MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER?
187
00:07:12,532 --> 00:07:14,934
IT DOES MAKE ME
FEEL BETTER, ABSOLUTELY.
188
00:07:15,034 --> 00:07:17,069
YOU ARE AS RIGHT
AS YOU ARE SLENDER.
189
00:07:17,170 --> 00:07:21,174
AND, UM, I-IT WAS
DUMB OF ME NOT TO SAY
SOMETHING EARLIER,
190
00:07:21,274 --> 00:07:23,609
BUT NOW THE--
THE SLATE IS CLEAN, OK,
191
00:07:23,709 --> 00:07:25,912
SO NO MORE SNIFFING,
NO MORE JUDGING,
192
00:07:26,012 --> 00:07:27,380
NO MORE SNOOPING,
ALL RIGHT?
193
00:07:27,480 --> 00:07:31,017
SO WHY DON'T WE GET
TO THE MAIN COURSE TONIGHT?
194
00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:35,421
WHAT ARE WE HAVIN',
ONE OF THE TWO KINDS OF CHICKEN
YOU MAKE EVERY NIGHT?
195
00:07:36,556 --> 00:07:39,192
YES.
196
00:07:39,292 --> 00:07:41,627
YOU--DO YOU KNOW
WHAT'S WEIRD, THOUGH?
HMM?
197
00:07:41,727 --> 00:07:44,931
I--I ACTUALLY
DROVE BY THE SCHOOL
ON WEDNESDAY,
198
00:07:45,031 --> 00:07:49,202
AND YOUR--YOUR CAR WAS
STILL IN YOUR SPACE.
199
00:07:49,302 --> 00:07:51,804
THAT'S BECAUSE, UH,
KENNY PICKED ME UP.
200
00:07:51,904 --> 00:07:53,506
SEE, BUT I LEFT
MY CAR IN THE SPACE
201
00:07:53,606 --> 00:07:57,109
SO IF YOU DROVE BY,
YOU WOULD STILL THINK
THAT I WAS WORKING.
202
00:07:57,210 --> 00:08:00,713
WOW. YOU REALLY
THOUGHT THIS WHOLE
THING THROUGH, HUH?
203
00:08:00,813 --> 00:08:03,115
YEAH, IT'S PRETTY
CALCULATED.
204
00:08:03,216 --> 00:08:04,951
I'M NOT PROUD.
205
00:08:05,051 --> 00:08:10,156
BUT I THOUGHT YOU SAID
THAT KENNY'S CAR WAS
IN THE SHOP LAST WEEK.
206
00:08:10,256 --> 00:08:11,958
DID I?
207
00:08:12,058 --> 00:08:13,125
YEAH, YOU DID.
208
00:08:13,226 --> 00:08:14,460
OH, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
209
00:08:14,560 --> 00:08:17,830
SEE--SEE, HONEY, WHEN I--
WHEN I SAY LAST WEEK,
210
00:08:17,930 --> 00:08:21,467
WHAT I MEAN IS--
IS THE WEEK BEFORE LAST.
211
00:08:21,567 --> 00:08:22,502
SO TWO WEEKS AGO?
212
00:08:22,602 --> 00:08:23,936
YES. TWO WEEKS IS CORRECT.
213
00:08:24,036 --> 00:08:29,442
NOW, IF I MEAN
THE WEEK PRIOR
TO THE WEEK WE'RE IN,
214
00:08:29,542 --> 00:08:31,210
THAT WOULD BE
THE PREVIOUS WEEK,
215
00:08:31,310 --> 00:08:33,412
BUT THE WEEK, UH--
A WEEK--WEEK AGO W-WOULD BE--
216
00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:35,147
THAT'S--THAT'S--
217
00:08:35,248 --> 00:08:38,885
SO THAT'S--THAT'S HOW I--
THAT'S HOW I DOOZE IT, YOU KNOW?
218
00:08:38,985 --> 00:08:40,119
THAT'S--I KNOW
IT'S UNCONVENTIONAL,
219
00:08:40,219 --> 00:08:42,288
BUT THAT'S--THAT'S HOW
MY MAMA TAUGHT ME,
220
00:08:42,388 --> 00:08:45,491
SO I'M JUST--
I'M JUST TRYIN'...
221
00:08:47,393 --> 00:08:49,328
I'M LYING. I'M LYING.
222
00:08:49,428 --> 00:08:50,329
I'M LYING AGAIN.
223
00:08:50,429 --> 00:08:52,064
I DON'T--ALL RIGHT.
I'M GONNA--
224
00:08:52,164 --> 00:08:54,433
I'M GONNA COME CLEAN HERE,
ALL RIGHT?
225
00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:57,136
KENNY'S CAR
WAS IN THE SHOP.
226
00:08:57,236 --> 00:08:58,337
LAST WEEK?
227
00:08:58,437 --> 00:09:00,106
YES.
228
00:09:00,206 --> 00:09:01,274
OK.
229
00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:04,210
SO IF KENNY'S CAR
WAS IN THE SHOP
230
00:09:04,310 --> 00:09:07,113
AND YOUR CAR
WAS AT SCHOOL,
231
00:09:07,213 --> 00:09:10,383
HOW'D YOU GET TO
THE INDIAN CASINO?
232
00:09:10,483 --> 00:09:12,852
WE HOOFED IT.
233
00:09:17,123 --> 00:09:18,057
YOU WALKED?
234
00:09:18,157 --> 00:09:19,358
THAT IS CORRECT.
235
00:09:19,458 --> 00:09:22,295
IT'S 72 MILES.
236
00:09:22,395 --> 00:09:25,197
WE HOOFED IT
TO THE FREIGHT TRAINS, SEE,
237
00:09:25,298 --> 00:09:29,635
AND THEN WE HOPPED
ON UP THERE LIKE A COUPLE
OF OLD-TIME HOBOS.
238
00:09:29,735 --> 00:09:33,940
OK, I DON'T BELIEVE
A WORD YOU'RE SAYING
RIGHT NOW.
239
00:09:34,040 --> 00:09:35,875
OH, WHERE DID
I LOSE YOU, "HOBO"?
240
00:09:35,975 --> 00:09:37,577
SOMEWHERE AROUND THERE,
YEAH.
241
00:09:37,677 --> 00:09:39,078
ALL RIGHT, SO--SO, OK.
242
00:09:39,178 --> 00:09:42,315
SO WHAT YOU'RE SAYING NOW IS
THAT--THAT YOU THINK I'M LYING.
243
00:09:42,415 --> 00:09:43,749
NO, I THINK
YOUR LIE IS A LIE,
244
00:09:43,849 --> 00:09:45,151
AND I THINK
YOU'RE DOING IT
245
00:09:45,251 --> 00:09:46,519
TO COVER UP SOMETHING
THAT YOU REALLY DID,
246
00:09:46,619 --> 00:09:48,654
AND IT MUST BE
SOMETHING REALLY BIG,
247
00:09:48,754 --> 00:09:50,856
'CAUSE YOU'RE MAKIN' UP
ALL KINDS OF STUFF TO
THROW ME OFF YOUR SCENT.
248
00:09:50,957 --> 00:09:53,793
OH, THAT IS--IS TOTALLY CRA--
YEAH, YEAH. GREA--GREAT IDEA.
249
00:09:53,893 --> 00:09:55,294
THAT'S SOMETHING
I WOULD REALLY DO.
250
00:09:55,394 --> 00:09:58,731
I WOULD USE A FAKE LIE
TO COVER UP MY REAL LIE.
251
00:09:58,831 --> 00:10:00,299
YEAH, YEAH.
THAT'S REALLY A GREAT IDEA.
252
00:10:00,399 --> 00:10:03,069
YEAH, THAT'S--THAT'S
THE PLAN I WOULD USE, JOY.
253
00:10:03,169 --> 00:10:05,905
H-HOW--HOW STUPID
DO YOU THINK I AM, REALLY?
254
00:10:06,005 --> 00:10:09,508
I MEAN, COME O--
I KNOW I'M STUPID,
BUT I'M NOT THAT STUPID.
255
00:10:09,609 --> 00:10:12,712
I'M NOT SO SURE
YOU'RE NOT THAT STUPID.
256
00:10:12,812 --> 00:10:13,713
WELL...
257
00:10:13,813 --> 00:10:14,981
I AM SURE.
258
00:10:15,081 --> 00:10:17,283
THAT'S BECAUSE
YOU'RE STUPID.
259
00:10:17,383 --> 00:10:18,551
YOU KNOW WHAT?
260
00:10:18,651 --> 00:10:20,753
I--I WAS GONNA
LET THIS WHOLE THING GO.
261
00:10:20,853 --> 00:10:22,321
I REALLY WA--
I ACTUALLY FELT BADLY.
262
00:10:22,421 --> 00:10:24,557
BUT NOW, I AM GONNA
BE WATCHING YOU, BUDDY.
263
00:10:24,657 --> 00:10:26,258
I AM GONNA BE
IN YOUR HEAD.
264
00:10:26,359 --> 00:10:29,362
I AM GONNA KNOW
WHAT YOU'RE THINKING
BEFORE YOU THINK IT.
265
00:10:29,462 --> 00:10:31,397
YEAH, WHAT AM I
THINKIN' RIGHT NOW?
266
00:10:31,497 --> 00:10:32,398
YOU WANT BROWNIES.
267
00:10:32,498 --> 00:10:36,602
GET OUT OF MY HEAD,
YOU WITCH!
268
00:10:39,405 --> 00:10:42,341
HEY. THERE'S
MY THINK TANK.
269
00:10:42,441 --> 00:10:43,876
LUNCH IS ON ME, FELLAS.
270
00:10:43,976 --> 00:10:45,011
REALLY?
NO.
271
00:10:45,111 --> 00:10:46,212
HOW'D IT GO?
BAD.
272
00:10:46,312 --> 00:10:47,446
WHAT HAPPENED?
273
00:10:47,546 --> 00:10:49,215
SHE DIDN'T BUY
MY FAKE LIE.
274
00:10:49,315 --> 00:10:53,386
SHE--SHE TORE IT APART
LIKE A FAT MAN
ON A POT ROAST.
275
00:10:53,486 --> 00:10:54,887
WHICH LIE
DID YOU GO WITH?
276
00:10:54,987 --> 00:10:59,125
PRETENDED TO WORK LATE,
WALK TO INDIAN CASINO.
277
00:10:59,225 --> 00:11:02,461
WOW. HOW'D SHE SEE
THROUGH THAT ONE?
278
00:11:02,561 --> 00:11:03,629
IT'S NOT FUNNY, MAN.
279
00:11:03,729 --> 00:11:05,031
IT'S A LITTLE FUNNY.
280
00:11:05,131 --> 00:11:06,832
NO, NO, NO, IT ISN'T.
I'M IN BIG TROUBLE,
281
00:11:06,932 --> 00:11:09,702
AND I HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING.
WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?
282
00:11:09,802 --> 00:11:11,303
OK, LET'S JUST
CALM DOWN.
283
00:11:11,404 --> 00:11:14,907
I CAN'T CALM DOWN.
MY LIE IS SPINNING
OUT OF CONTROL.
284
00:11:15,007 --> 00:11:16,175
WHAT LIE?
285
00:11:16,275 --> 00:11:17,410
THERE ISN'T ONE!
286
00:11:17,510 --> 00:11:18,644
THAT'S THE PROBLEM.
287
00:11:18,744 --> 00:11:20,513
I HAVE TO DO
SOMETHING BAD, AND FAST.
288
00:11:20,613 --> 00:11:25,351
I DON'T KNOW WHY I
LISTENED TO YOU GUYS
IN THE FIRST PLACE.
289
00:11:25,451 --> 00:11:26,385
ALL RIGHT, LOOK.
290
00:11:26,485 --> 00:11:27,486
SO OUR PLAN
DIDN'T WORK.
291
00:11:27,586 --> 00:11:28,688
IT'S NOT
THE FIRST TIME.
292
00:11:28,788 --> 00:11:31,757
IT'S TRUE.
YOU CAN'T BE SHOCKED BY THIS.
293
00:11:31,857 --> 00:11:33,259
EDDIE, I KNOW
THIS LOOKS BAD,
294
00:11:33,359 --> 00:11:34,694
BUT YOU'RE BASICALLY
A GOOD PERSON.
295
00:11:34,794 --> 00:11:36,362
I MEAN, EVEN IF
SHE'S LOOKIN',
296
00:11:36,462 --> 00:11:38,097
WHAT'S SHE
REALLY GONNA FIND?
297
00:11:38,197 --> 00:11:41,901
YEAH. I MEAN, WHAT'S
THE WORST THING YOU'VE
DONE IN YOUR MARRIAGE?
298
00:11:42,535 --> 00:11:44,470
I DID SOMETHIN'.
299
00:11:44,570 --> 00:11:46,272
WHAT?
300
00:11:46,372 --> 00:11:48,407
I CAN'T TELL YOU.
301
00:11:48,507 --> 00:11:51,510
WAS IT
IN SOUTHEAST ASIA?
302
00:11:51,610 --> 00:11:53,112
WHAT? NO.
303
00:11:53,212 --> 00:11:54,246
I'M NOT BUYIN' IT.
304
00:11:54,346 --> 00:11:55,614
YOU DIDN'T DO
ANYTHING WRONG.
305
00:11:55,715 --> 00:11:56,782
YOU'RE A CHOIRBOY.
306
00:11:56,882 --> 00:11:59,318
NO, I DID SOMETHING WRONG.
307
00:11:59,418 --> 00:12:01,921
I'M A VERY BAD MAN.
308
00:12:02,021 --> 00:12:04,457
WHAT DID YOU DO
THAT WAS SO WRONG?
309
00:12:04,557 --> 00:12:07,059
I'VE NEVER
SAID IT OUT LOUD.
310
00:12:07,159 --> 00:12:09,095
SOMETHING VERY DARK.
311
00:12:09,195 --> 00:12:10,362
VERY DEVASTATING.
312
00:12:10,463 --> 00:12:12,765
IF IT EVER WAS
DISCOVERED, IT WOULD...
313
00:12:12,865 --> 00:12:18,037
RENDER THE LAST 20 YEARS
OF MY MARRIAGE
MEANINGLESS.
314
00:12:18,137 --> 00:12:19,238
WHAT WAS
THE LAST PART?
315
00:12:19,338 --> 00:12:20,806
"MEANINGLESS."
316
00:12:20,906 --> 00:12:24,577
20 YEARS AGO,
WHEN JOY AND I
FIRST GOT TOGETHER,
317
00:12:24,677 --> 00:12:26,378
WE DECIDED
TO MOVE IN, RIGHT.
318
00:12:26,479 --> 00:12:28,347
SHE--SHE HAD THIS CAT
NAMED GOOBER.
319
00:12:28,447 --> 00:12:32,051
I EXPLAINED TO HER THAT
I WAS ALLERGIC TO CATS.
320
00:12:32,151 --> 00:12:37,690
A FEW DAYS LATER,
SHE GAVE HER BELOVED
GOOBER AWAY.
321
00:12:37,790 --> 00:12:39,525
SHE DID IT FOR ME.
322
00:12:39,625 --> 00:12:41,527
SHE DID IT FOR LOVE.
323
00:12:41,627 --> 00:12:44,096
IT WAS
AN AMAZING GESTURE
324
00:12:44,196 --> 00:12:46,432
THAT I CAN NEVER REPAY.
325
00:12:46,532 --> 00:12:48,167
SO WHAT'S WRONG
WITH THAT?
326
00:12:48,267 --> 00:12:49,468
I'M NOT ALLERGIC
TO CATS.
327
00:12:49,568 --> 00:12:52,638
I JUST HATE 'EM,
ESPECIALLY THAT NO-GOOD,
328
00:12:52,738 --> 00:12:55,307
ANKLE-BITIN'
SON OF A BITCH.
329
00:12:55,407 --> 00:12:58,110
ANYWAY, AFTER--AFTER
SHE GAVE THE CAT AWAY,
330
00:12:58,210 --> 00:13:03,048
SHE--SHE CRIED
HERSELF TO SLEEP FOR
THE--THE NEXT 6 WEEKS.
331
00:13:03,149 --> 00:13:05,184
WELL, WHY DIDN'T YOU
JUST TELL HER
THE TRUTH?
332
00:13:05,284 --> 00:13:08,187
WELL, I COULDN'T SHOW HER
THAT I WAS A LIAR
333
00:13:08,287 --> 00:13:10,289
THAT EARLY
IN OUR RELATIONSHIP.
334
00:13:10,389 --> 00:13:12,057
BUT YOU WERE.
335
00:13:12,158 --> 00:13:13,259
NO, NOT TO HER.
336
00:13:13,359 --> 00:13:15,461
TO HER, I WAS
SWEET, NICE EDDIE
337
00:13:15,561 --> 00:13:16,962
WITH A CRIPPLING
CAT ALLERGY.
338
00:13:17,062 --> 00:13:18,564
HOW DO YOU LIVE
WITH THE GUILT?
339
00:13:18,664 --> 00:13:20,933
IT'S NOT EASY,
MY BROTHER.
340
00:13:21,033 --> 00:13:24,403
EVERY NIGHT,
I WOULD LIE AWAKE
AND JUST PRAY TO GOD
341
00:13:24,503 --> 00:13:27,239
THAT I WOULD ACTUALLY
BECOME ALLERGIC TO CATS
342
00:13:27,339 --> 00:13:30,643
SO I COULD LIVE WITH
MYSELF RETROACTIVELY.
343
00:13:30,743 --> 00:13:32,912
BUT MY PRAYERS
WERE NEVER ANSWERED.
344
00:13:33,012 --> 00:13:37,449
FOR THE LAST
20 YEARS, EVERY TIME
I WALK BY A CAT,
345
00:13:37,550 --> 00:13:39,652
I HAVE TO START
SNEEZING WILDLY.
346
00:13:39,752 --> 00:13:42,454
IT'S NOT EASY.
IT'S A LOT OF PRESSURE
347
00:13:42,555 --> 00:13:46,458
AND, QUITE FRANKLY,
LOOKS RATHER SILLY.
348
00:13:47,593 --> 00:13:48,928
BUT I DO IT.
349
00:13:49,028 --> 00:13:52,865
OUR CAR ONCE BROKE DOWN
IN FRONT OF A CAT FARM.
350
00:13:52,965 --> 00:13:56,635
I HAD TO ACTUALLY
FAKE A SEIZURE.
351
00:13:56,735 --> 00:13:57,937
A CAT FARM?
352
00:13:58,037 --> 00:14:02,741
OH, THEY'RE OUT THERE,
MOSTLY IN AMISH COUNTRY.
353
00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:08,714
AND 9.
354
00:14:08,814 --> 00:14:11,717
COME ON. EVERY REP
IS A DECISION TO BE FIT.
355
00:14:11,817 --> 00:14:14,653
CHALLENGE YOURSELF. AND...
356
00:14:14,753 --> 00:14:15,955
10. YES.
357
00:14:16,055 --> 00:14:19,191
ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT,
YOU WANT A TURN?
358
00:14:19,291 --> 00:14:21,193
NAH, I'M GOOD.
359
00:14:21,293 --> 00:14:22,428
YOU SURE?
360
00:14:22,528 --> 00:14:23,662
OH, SUPER SURE.
361
00:14:23,762 --> 00:14:25,631
I JUST ACTUALLY CAUGHT
A GLIMPSE OF MYSELF
362
00:14:25,731 --> 00:14:28,200
IN THE MIRROR,
AND I LIKE WHAT I SEE.
363
00:14:28,300 --> 00:14:30,436
AH, COME ON, JOY.
YOU KNOW HOW
GOOD YOU FEEL
364
00:14:30,536 --> 00:14:33,472
WHEN YOU WORK OUT
AND YOU GET THOSE
ENDORPHINS FLOWIN'.
365
00:14:33,572 --> 00:14:35,541
YOU FEEL LIKE YOU REALLY
ACCOMPLISHED SOMETHING.
366
00:14:35,641 --> 00:14:38,611
ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT,
LET'S DO THIS.
367
00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:41,747
LET ME JUST GET
MY WEIGHTS.
368
00:14:45,451 --> 00:14:46,518
FEEL THE BURN.
369
00:14:46,619 --> 00:14:49,955
SO, DID YOU FIND OUT
WHAT EDDIE DID?
370
00:14:50,055 --> 00:14:52,224
NO. HE'S HOLDING OUT ON ME.
371
00:14:52,324 --> 00:14:53,759
MMM.
372
00:14:53,859 --> 00:14:56,295
YOU KNOW, THE OTHER NIGHT,
I ACTUALLY WENT THROUGH
HIS JACKET.
373
00:14:56,395 --> 00:14:57,429
DID YOU FIND
ANYTHING?
374
00:14:57,529 --> 00:14:59,999
[SIGHS]
MEATBALL SANDWICH.
375
00:15:00,099 --> 00:15:01,800
PRETTY UNSOLVED
RUBIK'S CUBE.
376
00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:05,471
I SWEAR--YOU KNOW, I KNOW
THAT HE HAS DONE SOMETHING,
377
00:15:05,571 --> 00:15:07,239
A-AND I--I CAN'T
FIGURE IT OUT.
378
00:15:07,339 --> 00:15:09,408
I MEAN,
IT'S DRIVIN' ME NUTS.
379
00:15:09,508 --> 00:15:10,843
YOU KNOW,
MY FRIEND SHEILA
380
00:15:10,943 --> 00:15:13,946
FOUND A PAIR OF PANTIES
AND A COCKTAIL DRESS
381
00:15:14,046 --> 00:15:15,547
IN HER HUSBAND'S
GYM BAG.
382
00:15:15,648 --> 00:15:18,384
TURNS OUT
HE WAS A CROSS-DRESSER.
383
00:15:18,484 --> 00:15:20,452
WELL, I--I DON'T HAVE TO
WORRY ABOUT THAT WITH EDDIE.
384
00:15:20,552 --> 00:15:24,490
THERE'S NO HIGH HEEL
IN THE WORLD THAT
WOULD FIT THOSE FEET.
385
00:15:24,590 --> 00:15:27,259
LAST YEAR,
I THOUGHT STEVEN
WAS HAVING AN AFFAIR.
386
00:15:27,359 --> 00:15:32,031
TURNS OUT HE WAS JUST
BEING BLACKMAILED BY A
FORMER BUSINESS PARTNER.
387
00:15:32,131 --> 00:15:34,366
I WAS WORRIED
FOR NOTHING.
388
00:15:34,466 --> 00:15:38,837
YOU DON'T THINK EDDIE COULD BE
HAVING AN AFFAIR, DO YOU?
389
00:15:38,938 --> 00:15:40,039
OH, OF COURSE NOT.
390
00:15:40,139 --> 00:15:42,641
I MEAN,
HOW'S YOUR SEX LIFE?
391
00:15:42,741 --> 00:15:45,911
W-WELL, WE HAVEN'T
HAD SEX LATELY.
392
00:15:46,011 --> 00:15:47,947
DEFINE "LATELY."
393
00:15:48,047 --> 00:15:49,515
NOT IN A WHILE.
394
00:15:49,615 --> 00:15:51,083
DEFINE "A WHILE."
395
00:15:51,183 --> 00:15:53,819
I DON'T WANNA.
396
00:16:05,464 --> 00:16:06,432
ALL RIGHT, LOOK,
397
00:16:06,532 --> 00:16:07,900
I'M GONNA LEVEL WITH YOU.
398
00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:12,504
I-I'M GONNA BE
TOTALLY HONEST,
BECAUSE THIS IS CRAZY.
399
00:16:12,604 --> 00:16:13,973
UH-HUH.
400
00:16:14,073 --> 00:16:16,976
THE REASON I SAID
JOY WAS IN THE CAR
401
00:16:17,076 --> 00:16:19,445
IS BECAUSE AS--
AS YOU KNOW, UM, UH,
402
00:16:19,545 --> 00:16:23,082
KENNY DOES--DOES NOT HAVE
THE BENEFIT OF A WOMAN.
403
00:16:23,182 --> 00:16:25,050
AND--AND SOMETIMES,
404
00:16:25,150 --> 00:16:26,752
HE CALLS ME LATE AT NIGHT,
405
00:16:26,852 --> 00:16:30,122
A-AND I TALK DIRTY TO HIM.
406
00:16:35,094 --> 00:16:36,595
OH, MY GOD.
YOU'RE HAVING AN AFFAIR.
407
00:16:36,695 --> 00:16:40,232
NO, NO. NO, NO.
I'M NO--I'M NOT
SLEEPING WITH HIM.
408
00:16:40,332 --> 00:16:42,267
IT'S JUST DIRTY TALK.
409
00:16:42,368 --> 00:16:44,036
NO, THA--THAT IS
NOT WHAT I MEAN.
410
00:16:44,136 --> 00:16:45,704
YOU'RE LYING
TO ME AGAIN.
411
00:16:45,804 --> 00:16:47,272
THERE MUST BE
SOMETHING. YOU MUST
BE HAVING AN AFFAI--
412
00:16:47,373 --> 00:16:48,507
IS IT THAT TRAMP,
JANE WASSERMAN?
413
00:16:48,607 --> 00:16:50,075
BECAUSE
I WILL KILL HER.
414
00:16:50,175 --> 00:16:52,444
OH, COME--OK, NOW--
NOW YOU'RE ACTING
LIKE A CRAZY PERSON.
415
00:16:52,544 --> 00:16:54,947
WELL, WHAT AM I
SUPPOSED TO THINK?
YOU KEEP LYING TO ME.
416
00:16:55,047 --> 00:16:59,251
OK, FIRST OF ALL,
I COULD NEVER GET
JANE WASSERMAN.
417
00:17:00,219 --> 00:17:01,820
RIGHT? YEAH.
418
00:17:01,920 --> 00:17:03,522
I MEAN, COULD I? IF--
419
00:17:03,622 --> 00:17:04,790
ALL RIGHT, LOOK. THI--
420
00:17:04,890 --> 00:17:05,991
OK, H-HERE'S THE POINT.
421
00:17:06,091 --> 00:17:08,627
I--I LOVE YOU MORE
THAN YOU CAN IMAGINE,
422
00:17:08,727 --> 00:17:12,564
AND I--I WOULD NEVER CHEAT
ON YOU IN A MILLION YEARS.
423
00:17:12,664 --> 00:17:15,100
YOU WANNA KNOW
WHAT THE TRUTH IS?
424
00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:16,402
I NEVER DID ANYTHING.
425
00:17:16,502 --> 00:17:18,137
THEN WHY ON EARTH
WOULD YOU LIE TO ME?
426
00:17:18,237 --> 00:17:21,006
BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T
TRUST ME, AND YOU SAID
YOU WOULD START DIGGING.
427
00:17:21,106 --> 00:17:22,908
WELL, WHO CARES,
IF THERE'S NOTHING
TO FIND?
428
00:17:23,008 --> 00:17:26,845
WELL, HO--NOTHING TO FI--
HOW DO I--I DON'T KNOW
WHAT YOU'RE GONNA FIND.
429
00:17:26,945 --> 00:17:28,781
YOU JUST GOT DONE SAYING
THAT THERE WAS NOTHING.
430
00:17:28,881 --> 00:17:30,149
I DID.
431
00:17:30,249 --> 00:17:31,417
TH-THEN YOU'RE STILL
AFRAID OF ME DIGGING?
432
00:17:31,517 --> 00:17:32,818
THAT'S RIGHT.
433
00:17:32,918 --> 00:17:34,053
WELL, THEN YOU MUST BE
LYING ABOUT SOMETHING.
434
00:17:34,153 --> 00:17:35,754
I'M NOT. I'M NOT
LYING ABOUT ANYTHING.
435
00:17:35,854 --> 00:17:37,089
THIS IS
ABSOLUTELY CRAZY.
436
00:17:37,189 --> 00:17:38,924
I KNOW, BECAUSE YOU'RE
MAKIN' EVERYTHING SCREWY.
437
00:17:39,024 --> 00:17:40,059
THAT'S WHY.
OK.
438
00:17:40,159 --> 00:17:41,560
BACK UP HERE,
ALL RIGHT?
439
00:17:41,660 --> 00:17:45,130
YES.
WHEN YOU TOLD KENNY,
"JOY'S IN THE CAR,"
440
00:17:45,230 --> 00:17:46,799
YOU WERE NOT HIDING
ANYTHING AT ALL?
441
00:17:46,899 --> 00:17:47,733
I--NOTHING.
442
00:17:47,833 --> 00:17:49,568
I'M AS CLEAN
AS A WHISTLE.
443
00:17:49,668 --> 00:17:52,237
BECAUSE TRUST IS
THE MOST IMPORTANT THING
IN A RELATIONSHIP.
444
00:17:52,337 --> 00:17:57,076
I GOTTA TELL YOU,
IF YOU DON'T HAVE TRUST,
YOU DON'T HAVE NOTHIN'.
445
00:17:57,176 --> 00:17:59,912
A-AND I COULD NOT AGREE
WITH YOU MORE.
446
00:18:00,012 --> 00:18:01,914
OK, SO JUST TO CLEAR
THE DECKS HERE,
447
00:18:02,014 --> 00:18:05,984
IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE,
ANY OTHER LIES THAT YOU
WANNA CLEAN UP?
448
00:18:06,085 --> 00:18:07,386
THERE IS--
449
00:18:07,486 --> 00:18:09,088
ANYTHING AT ALL FROM
OUR WHOLE RELATIONSHIP,
450
00:18:09,188 --> 00:18:11,623
ANYTHING THAT YOU
HAVEN'T TOLD ME?
451
00:18:11,723 --> 00:18:15,761
THERE IS NOTHING.
I AM AN OPEN BOOK.
452
00:18:15,861 --> 00:18:16,895
ALL RIGHT.
453
00:18:16,995 --> 00:18:19,031
OK.
454
00:18:20,032 --> 00:18:21,400
ALL RIGHT.
455
00:18:23,635 --> 00:18:26,839
THERE IS ONE THING.
456
00:18:35,547 --> 00:18:36,515
WHAT?
457
00:18:36,615 --> 00:18:40,018
I'M NOT ALLERGIC TO CATS.
458
00:18:42,321 --> 00:18:43,856
WHAT IS THAT, NOW?
459
00:18:43,956 --> 00:18:46,425
I'M NOT ALLERGIC TO CATS.
460
00:18:46,525 --> 00:18:47,693
NEVER HAVE BEEN.
461
00:18:47,793 --> 00:18:49,061
WELL,
O-OF COURSE YOU ARE.
462
00:18:49,161 --> 00:18:51,330
Y-YOU SNEEZE EVERY TIME
WE PASS A CAT.
463
00:18:51,430 --> 00:18:54,533
YEAH, THA-THAT'S
A FAKE SNEEZE.
464
00:18:55,667 --> 00:18:56,969
A FAKE SNEEZE?
465
00:18:57,069 --> 00:18:57,936
[SNEEZES]
466
00:18:58,036 --> 00:18:59,705
SEE? LIKE THAT.
467
00:19:05,844 --> 00:19:06,845
OH, MY GOD.
468
00:19:06,945 --> 00:19:09,148
YOU MADE ME
GIVE AWAY GOOBER
469
00:19:09,248 --> 00:19:12,151
BECAUSE YOU WERE
ALLERGIC TO CATS.
470
00:19:12,251 --> 00:19:14,153
[GASPS] WH-WHY WOULD
YOU DO THAT TO ME?
471
00:19:14,253 --> 00:19:17,723
I LOVED THAT CAT
MORE THAN ANYTHING
IN THE WORLD.
472
00:19:17,823 --> 00:19:20,792
I'M JUST NOT
A BIG CAT GUY.
473
00:19:20,893 --> 00:19:24,696
YOU'RE NOT
A BIG CAT GUY?
474
00:19:24,796 --> 00:19:28,100
I AM A BIG WAR HERO,
THOUGH.
475
00:19:42,814 --> 00:19:44,416
[GASPS]
476
00:19:44,516 --> 00:19:48,253
I TOOK THE DAY OFF,
AND I--I DROVE UP
TO AMISH COUNTRY,
477
00:19:48,353 --> 00:19:54,059
AND I STOPPED
AT THAT CAT FARM
WE USED TO PASS BY.
478
00:19:54,159 --> 00:19:57,663
GOD, I DON'T KNOW
WHY I'M LYING. I--I--
479
00:19:57,763 --> 00:20:01,733
I GOT HER
AT THE PET STORE
AT THE MALL.
480
00:20:01,833 --> 00:20:03,435
AW, EDDIE.
481
00:20:03,535 --> 00:20:05,470
I KNOW SHE'S NOT
YOUR OLD CAT,
482
00:20:05,571 --> 00:20:10,142
BUT I HOPE THAT YOU
COULD LEARN TO LOVE
THIS LITTLE CREATURE
483
00:20:10,242 --> 00:20:13,445
AND MAYBE
SOMEDAY ME AGAIN.
484
00:20:17,716 --> 00:20:21,853
IF YOU NEED ME,
I'LL BE IN MY ROOM.
485
00:20:24,456 --> 00:20:26,191
HI.
486
00:20:26,291 --> 00:20:27,793
THANKS FOR A NEW KITTY, BABE.
487
00:20:27,893 --> 00:20:33,098
DON'T YOU JUST
LOVE THE WAY SHE LIKES
TO SLEEP IN BETWEEN US?
488
00:20:33,198 --> 00:20:36,001
YEAH, IT'S THE BEST.
489
00:20:36,101 --> 00:20:38,437
[CELL PHONE RINGS]
490
00:20:38,537 --> 00:20:39,204
{\an8}HELLO.
491
00:20:39,304 --> 00:20:40,772
{\an8}KENNY:
HEY, IT'S KENNY.
492
00:20:40,872 --> 00:20:43,208
{\an8}HEY, KENNY.
493
00:20:45,177 --> 00:20:46,878
{\an8}WHAT'S UP?
494
00:20:46,979 --> 00:20:48,814
{\an8}MAN, YOU WERE RIGHT. HEH.
495
00:20:48,914 --> 00:20:52,150
{\an8}THAT NEW WAITRESS
HAS AMAZING CANS.
HA HA HA HA!
496
00:20:52,251 --> 00:20:56,355
{\an8}HOW DID YOU
DESCRIBE THEM AGAIN?
497
00:20:56,455 --> 00:20:58,890
{\an8}JOY'S IN THE CAR,
ISN'T SHE?
498
00:20:58,991 --> 00:21:00,225
{\an8}HI, KENNY.
499
00:21:00,325 --> 00:21:02,494
{\an8}HE ALSO SAID YOUR CANS
ARE PRETTY GREAT.
500
00:21:02,594 --> 00:21:05,397
{\an8}YOU KNOW, FOR YOUR AGE.
501
00:21:06,398 --> 00:21:08,634
{\an8}UM, I'M GONNA HANG UP NOW.
502
00:21:10,736 --> 00:21:12,037
{\an8}[CHEERING]
38728
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