All language subtitles for Splitting Up Together s02e07 Paige Turner.eng

[ Door closes ]

Wow.

Big Adele fan, huh?

No, just a fan of
a free T-shirt.

Look, I'm here to update you
on the construction.

I, uh, I have a new date
of completion.

Vlad, Vlad, Vlad, this ain't
my first rodeo, all right?

We agreed on eight weeks.

So before you go trying
to pad the schedule

with some story about a fire
at the sconce factory,

this job will be done --

In one week.
What?

We're a little early,
so feel free

to use it on
your Yelp review.

That's a lot early.

I mean,
that is good news, yes?

Now you can
sell the house.

Yeah, right, of course.
We're absolutely gonna do that.

Right after we redo
the garage. What?

You're finished so early,

let's put in a new kitchen,
update the bath.

How long will that take?

We already have a lot
of work lined up.

I mean, I can try
to squeeze in -- Squeeze in.

It will not be quick.
Who said quick?

Take your time.

Treat me like a lady.

Incidentally, we're gonna
need to pay you

in tiny, lady-like
installments.

♪♪

♪ Keep giving me hope
for a better day ♪

♪ Keep giving me love
to find a way ♪

♪ Through this heaviness
I feel ♪

♪ I just need someone to say
everything's okay ♪

♪ Everything's okay ♪

--Captions by VITAC--

Hey, neighbor.
Hey.

I made you something.

Breakfast buns?

These are them?
You made these for me?

Well, I made 'em
for the kids,

but I had couple dozen
left over, so...

Mmm.

I also wanted to talk with you
about remodeling the garage.

So good.
I was thinking

maybe we bring this
whole place up to code.

Why?

Why are they so good?
Huh?

I mean, did you put extra
cinnamon o-or, like, vanilla?

Maybe put in
a small kitchen?

Smart. Yeah, it'll be great for
the resale value when we sell.

Ifwe sell.

When we sell.Iforwhenwe sell.

Just ask Vlad just not to start
work in here right away.

I have plans
tomorrow night.

Oh, no problem.

Thank you.

What the hell?

Oh, yeah, no, it's, uh,
it's citrus-tinged...

Uh, yeah.
With, uh --

With hints of sun-dried
huckleberry. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Now, would you
say that scent

is overpowering
or welcoming?

Welcoming?
Mm.

I guess?
Good. Good, good, good.

And would you say
the throw pillows

are carefully arranged
or casually tossed?

'Cause I'm going
with casually tossed.

Do you have
a garage date?

Well, we may not limit it
to the garage,

but, uh, yeah.

Yeah. First date.

You know, you don't wanna just
keep her in the garage.

Get her out there,
see some things.

It's not a first date.

Of course not.
Why would it be?

Just awesome,
crazy, sexy, cool.

So, where did you meet
this little chickadee,

this boneless, skinless
lil' nugget?

Um, well, uh, she works
in my building,

and she has bones
and skin.

Jackpot.

I'm sorry.

Is this making you
feel weird?

I-I'm actually
feeling weird.

What?! Why?
I just --

It's not weird at all.

Not a'tall.

I am super psyched
for you guys,

and I hope you have
so much fun

on your date with the
casually-tossed pillows.

♪♪

Arthur: Doesn't he have
someplace to go?

If he did, wouldn't he
be there right now?

I mean, what do
children do all day?

Sell magazines?

He's obviously exhausted.

Yeah.
Right?

I'm sure he'll wake up
when it's time to feed.

For now,

I'm just gonna leave him with
these frozen mozzarella sticks,

house key,
some pocket cash,

and a sticky note
expressing our love.

Mwah.

Okay, does he really
need $100?

Yes, he does.

Love you, Auntie.

It's a joy
I've never known.

Do you love me?

Lena:
Am I thrilled that he's got some rando garage gal staying over?

Maya: Okay, how is she
the garage gal?

You're the one
who lives in there.

Seriously, could you imagine
if some guy was like,

"Hey, come on over
to my garage.

Do you -- Uh, did you want to
watch some TV in my garage?

Can I get you a drink from the
mini-fridge in my garage?"

That'syourmini-fridge.

You bought it.

Well.

I'm certainly not
gonna rock the boat.

Martin's already got
one foot out the door.

You know who doesn't have
one foot out the door?

My little nephew.

Sleeping in his little
footsie pajamas,

with his little
fuzz-stache,

holding onto his big,
ol' bottle of grape soda

he falls asleep with
every night.

You know,
he just lost a tooth.

Camille,
that's not good.

I don't judge your parenting,
"garage girl."

I honestly don't know what his
mother is so upset about.

The kid's
an absolute angel.

Well, that's probably
because you don't ask him

to do anything

like brush his teeth
or take a shower.

How's he doing
in school?

Camille?

Gun-Woo goes to school,
right?

I assume so.
I don't know for sure.

I'm not his jailer.

Oh, my God.
That's a no.

He's here on vacation.

Plus it was just
Thanksgiving,

so aren't schools shut down
until after...Sundance?

My understanding
was that the two of you

were supposed to be helping
him get his act together.

By doing what?

By sticking him
in another institution

that he's just gonna
fail out of

because they don't get him
nor he them?

Well, what about
home-school?

I -- I've been doing
some research,

and I think I might
actually do that myself.

I think I might actually
do thatmyself.

But you're not really
an educator.

Aren't I?

I mean, no.
No.

Look, I think that
we can all agree

that with smartphones and
iPhones and Androids,

AT&T, Sprint,
and Verizon...

She's just naming
phone carriers.

...knowledge is obsolete.

Everyone just Googles
everything anyway.

But do you know what
you can't Google?

Good taste,
a discriminating palate.

And those are the things
that I can teach him.

Well, I'm sold.

♪♪

Lena: Hey, Vlad?

Martin wants us to hold
the work on the garage.

Apparently he and his
girlfriend have plans.

I mean, girlfriend
is a little premature,

but she is staying over.

Which is great
and not at all weird.

I made some crudités
for him to put out -- Yes, we can do that, sir.

Oh, on the phone.
You are on the phone.

That's why I sent you
the samples, yes. Uh...

I'm -- I'm still talking.

I thought you might
react this way.

We can try it again, yes.

Hopefully fourth time's
the charm.

You have a good one, too.

Mm-hmm.
Bad day?

I actually think
I found a client

that's more difficult
than you.

I'm particular.

I think that's
a bit more fair.

And just like you,
he is very, very annoying.

But at least you know
exactly what you want.

This guy has no idea.

Have you tried asking him
what sort of lifestyle

he aspires to,
you know,

and then work those elements
into a concrete design?

What do you mean?

Let's say he wants
to feel like

a fancy Moroccan hotelier.

You suggest a sunken living room
with a fire element.

Woven rugs, hanging lanterns,
decorative tile...

You speak high-maintenance
crazy person.

Well...
You are bilingual.

Come speak to my mentally
unstable client,

translate for me.

Uh, I'm very flattered,
but --

♪♪

Actually, I'd love to
get out of the house. Yes?

Yeah.
Great.

When I was child,
I had no real mentors

because all of the grown-ups
around me were so tacky.

Sad.

And it seemed like

all those tacky grown-ups
cared about

was whether or not I knew
the capital of Ethiopia.

Addis Ababa.

What?
The capital of Ethiopia.

Okay, great.

Youknowthe capital
of Ethiopia. Done.

Now, do you know how to
cultivate your own steez

without being
a label whore?

Not sure.
Do you know how to fake it till you make it,

frontin' like you
livin' that five-star, baller-ass lifestyle

when all you really got
in your pocket

is a used-up
In-N-Out gift card?

Because those are the things
T-Mobile can't teach you.

But I can.

Whoa.

I want this guest bathroom
to be perfect.

Like...mm, Mid-Century?

I love Mid-Century.
But Mid-Century now.

Future farmhouse.
Okay.

And I want an infinity sink
and infinity towels.

So, like, towels
that don't stop?

Yeah, they just
go on forever.

Just infinity.

And how many of
those do you want?

Just, like, two.

Also, you don't have
to run everything by me.

I'm super easy.

Listen, I'm done.

Let's quit this guy,

go to Fatburger right now,
please.

Farro.

I have two words,

and you can call me crazy

or you can call me crazy
like a dang fox.

Rose gold.

[ Inhales sharply ]

Well, I'm a dirty slut
for rose gold.

But that's not it.

I'm also seeing
a dark, charcoal wash

floor to ceiling.

It will create a caustic,
dystopian landscape...

[ Gasps ]
...that will be overthrown

by the luxe, gleaming,
rose gold fixtures.

The juxtaposition
will be sublime.

I'm literally...
going to vomit...joy.

I love it.

I love this woman,
and I lurve her ideas.

We cannot finish this project
without she.

I'll pay whatever.

I'll work hourly,

and you never have to speak
to Farro again.

Let's go get that Fatburger.
Deal?

Deal.

♪♪

When is the best time to visit
the Grecian Isles?

Uh, before Easter
to avoid tourists.

Correct.

Unless, of course,

you want to go to the beach,
then...?

Late July.

When is the best time
to visit Paris?

Christmas.
Trick question.

Paris is passé.

Right.
Christmas is always in Zurich.

Yes.
[ Watch chimes ]

Oop. Time for recess.

So, why don't you go
Nair your upper lip,

have a little grape soda,
brush after,

and then I'll see you back here
in three and a half hours.

Okay. Love you, Auntie.

Hey.

How's it going, teach?

[ Exhales sharply ]

I'm not sure whom's
teaching whom.

You're supposed to
be teaching him.

♪♪

E-Y. Boom.
Triple word score.

That's four times three.
That's not a word.

That's 12. "Noodley."

[ Laughing ] Oh, my God.
Yes, it is. "Noodley," right?

Like -- Like when you want
a noodle with something, right?

You're noodley.
So it has nothing to do with eating noodles?

Go ahead. Hm?
Challenge me.

Challenge me.
I challenge you.

[ Laughs ]
Mm.

I think your ex-wife
is watching us from the window.

What?
No, no, she wouldn't.

Oh, yep. That's her.

Lena.

Come on.

Yes, you.
Come out here.

[ Sighs ]
Lena: Hey!

Hey. Hey.

Look at...

Yeah. Okay.

Um...so, uh,
this is Paige.

Paige, uh,
this is my ex-wife, Lena,

and our contractor, Vlad.

Hi.

Oh, man.
We're moving kind of fast.

I'm not sure I'm ready
to meet your contractor.

[ Laughs ]

Witty!

Quick and witty.

Scrabble, huh?

Uh, yeah.
Oh, yeah, yeah.

This one is kicking
my ass.

She's up 100 points here.

Ooh!

Mm. Yeah. No.

We -- We were
in the garage,

but it's getting
kind of cramped, so...

Well, please let me be
the first to welcome you.

I already welcomed her.

Well, then let me be the
first person to say howdy.

Howdy-ya-doody.

Wow. You guys are just...
so cordial.

Mm.

I mean,
you'd have to be, right?

Right.
Right.

[ Clears throat ]

Right.

Good night.
Good night.

Yes, and may I wish you
a very...

...Lacey Chabert.

Let's go.

"Party of Five"?

Okay, so...

You wanna get
a bite to eat?

Are you kidding me?
Hm.

You're gonna act like that
did not just happen?

Like what didn't
just happen?

Well, I mean, she was so
uncomfortable that I was here.

Oh.

Maybe I just don't
get your whole setup.

Right, um, so, uh,
every other week --

No, I get it. I just --
I don't understand it.

Look,
this is all temporary.

You know, we're gonna
sell the house,

we're gonna go
our separate ways.

We already
talked about it.

Right.

And noodley's a word.

Yes.

Oh.

Don't trick me like that.
[ Laughs ]

Do you think Mr. Crazy will like
these tiles for his shower?

No. It needs to be matte.

Hey, what did you
think of Paige?

Uh, I don't know.
I mean, she seems -- 'Cause I really like her.

She is so, so great.

I mean, what a doll.

But what was up with her
calling us "cordial"?

That's a compliment, no?

Not how she said it.

So you don't like her?

No, I love her.

I just didn't expect her
to be so judgmental.

I mean, do you find her
to be judgmental,

bordering on intolerant?

Uh, I don't know.

All you American women
seem the same to me,

with all your flowy tops
and the shelter dogs.

I'm just surprised that
she's so age-appropriate.

Martin's mostly been dating
younger women, you know,

who are kind of flighty.

Not women like...

Paige!

[ Chuckles ]

Yeah, I see now.

You're still in love
with your ex-husband.

What? No.
Mm-hmm.

That's why
we fix the garage.

More construction
means more time,

you don't sell the house,

and then get him back
in your clutches.

I'm fine
with Martin dating.

I just want him
to be with someone

who's more on board with our
current living situation.

Butheis not
on board with it.

And I'm hoping
to change that.

Because you're
still in love.

[ Scoffs ] I am not.

I am going to be
in a relationship, too,

at some point.

Honey, you are already
in a relationship.

With him.

[ Laughing ] No.

I am a single woman.

You don't put out
single-woman vibes.

I put outmajorsingle-woman vibes.

To me,
you feel off the market.

Well, I'm not
off the market.

I am on the market.
I am an open house, baby.

Anyone in this neighborhood
could come by

and just walk
right through my --

♪♪

No heat.

Because you caught
me off-guard.

If I knew you were
gonna kiss me,

I would've brought
my "A"-game.

One more try.

No more tries.

Hey!

Hey, you work for me.

You get back here
and kiss me one more time!

♪♪

You looking
for something?

I was just showing Paige
our old record player.

You're not
gonna seduce her

using Coldplay on vinyl,
are you?

Um, no.

I retired that album
on you.

Good.

Hm.
Plans for the garage?

Actually,
it's for a client.

A client?

Yeah.
I forgot to tell you --

Vlad hired me to consult
on one of his remodels.

Wow, seriously?

Seriously.

Hm. [ Chuckles ]

Is that funny?

No. No, no, no.
I think it's, uh, it's awesome.

You'd be great at that.

Well, thanks.
Mm-hmm.

Martin, I need to
explain something.

Oh, about the spying?
Yeah.

Yeah, a-and it didn't help
to convince Paige

that our situation is chill,
by the way.

Aha, so shedoesn't think it's chill.

Because it's not chill.

Why were you
watching us? I'm not.

I-I thought there was
a wasps' nest...

Mm.
...hanging from the garage,

so actually, I was looking out
for you guys.

Okay. Hey.

Thank you. Got it.

I'll let her know.

Totally chill.

I just live with my ex-wife
and a bunch of wasps.

And our three kids.

Them, too.

Just keeps getting better
and better.

And don't forget
our turtle, Josh.

And everything he stands for.

♪♪

♪ Can't stop, won't stop,
get guap ♪

♪ Ten white toes in them
Tory flip-flops ♪

♪ Manicures and pedicures,
I'm always tip-top ♪

Camille, my dove,

you know I'm not one to confront
you about anything.

When we first started dating,

I let you call me Anton
for about six months.

Hm, I miss
the Anton days.

And, Gun-Woo,
I love your sound,

and I'm not really trying to
rock the boat or anything,

but I think there might be some
major holes in your curriculum.

Name one.

Science.

False.

We studied geology
yesterday.

♪ Show me how you do it ♪

It's a little cloudy.

Good catch.

Camille:
And after that, we did P.E.

♪♪

And then we started history.

See, this is her face in 2002,
and this is her face now.

Show me where
she's had work done.

[ Gasps ]

Bitch got a new chin.

Is he actually learning
anything academic?

Gun-Woo, if I take four
30-minute Pilates classes

for every one
45-minute barre class,

how many hours of total
exercise have I done

if I've done
three barre classes?

8 hours and 15 minutes,
Auntie.

Satisfied?

I am so sorry, baby.

I had no idea
how detailed and --

Bup, bup, bup,
bup, bup.

We're in the middle
of a lesson here.

Forgive my insolence.

I will make it up to you.

Perhaps a vacation to Zurich
for Christmas?

♪♪

Hey.
Hey.

Paige, um,
I was just...

I felt like there was some
awkwardness when we first met.

I felt like
I was awkward.

Yeah, you were.

Oh. Great.

Same "page."

[ Chuckles ]

I just -- I know that
this whole arrangement

might seem a little odd,

but I'm proud of
what we have here.

I mean, I'm -- I'm more
than proud. I cherish it.

But I could see how, if I were
the new girl coming in,

I might not like it
very much.

But you have to understand,

there are three kids
who still need two parents,

and we all
count on each other.

So I guess what I'm hoping
this breakfast will say is,

thank you in advance
for your understanding.

Mm.

Mmm.

So, that whole innocent,

disenfranchised
homemaker routine,

people are buying that?

[ Chuckles ] Beg pardon?

I've got your number,
lady.

And it has nothing
to do with your kids

or your home
or the co-parenting.

And it has everything
to do with you

and your unresolved feelings
for Martin.

Martin:
Babe, where'd you go?

Nowhere, hon.

Look!

We've got breakfast
in bed.

♪♪

Here we go.

Black, like your soul.

Just for the record,
I take 11 sugars.

Ew.

I might have another
design job for you,

a house in Bel Air.

They have lots of money
and terrible taste.

I'm in.

Oh, Mr. Crazy

hired a professional
photographer

to take pictures
of your bathroom.

You want to see?
Of course.

All right, here.

I really love what we did
with the hardware and --

♪♪

♪ Do me, baby ♪

♪ Like you wanna ♪

♪ Do me, baby ♪

♪ If you gonna ♪

♪ Do me ♪

♪ Like a nasty man ♪

That time,
I caughtyouoff-guard.

♪ Hold me ♪

♪ Do me if you wanna ♪

♪ Do me like you wanna ♪

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