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1
00:00:00,534 --> 00:00:02,170
[music playing]
2
00:00:03,704 --> 00:00:06,006
[harmonica music]
3
00:00:07,541 --> 00:00:10,078
That-- I know, Dan,
that's the throttle.
4
00:00:10,178 --> 00:00:11,379
Which is?
5
00:00:11,479 --> 00:00:13,214
Uh, like the gas.
6
00:00:13,314 --> 00:00:14,348
And this is?
7
00:00:14,448 --> 00:00:15,249
The brake.
8
00:00:15,349 --> 00:00:16,317
Which is?
9
00:00:16,417 --> 00:00:17,351
Like the brake.
10
00:00:17,451 --> 00:00:18,486
[laughter]
11
00:00:18,586 --> 00:00:19,887
And?
12
00:00:19,987 --> 00:00:22,323
You don't never want me to
use the two of them together.
13
00:00:22,423 --> 00:00:23,657
Because?
14
00:00:23,757 --> 00:00:28,296
Because it could rip a
hole in time and space and--
15
00:00:28,396 --> 00:00:29,530
[laughter]
16
00:00:29,630 --> 00:00:31,099
--we end up in a
parallel universe.
17
00:00:31,199 --> 00:00:31,999
[laughter]
18
00:00:32,100 --> 00:00:34,468
Correct.
19
00:00:34,568 --> 00:00:36,337
I can't wait till tomorrow
to really lay some rubber.
20
00:00:36,437 --> 00:00:38,139
[sigh]
[laughter]
21
00:00:38,239 --> 00:00:40,874
Look, why don't we just tool
around in the parking lot
22
00:00:40,974 --> 00:00:41,775
at Kmart, first.
23
00:00:41,875 --> 00:00:43,411
[laughter]
- What?
24
00:00:43,511 --> 00:00:44,845
You don't think I can
handle this thing?
25
00:00:44,945 --> 00:00:47,248
No, no, it's not that, honey.
26
00:00:47,348 --> 00:00:49,450
This is a very special bike.
27
00:00:49,550 --> 00:00:51,952
Yes, Dan, I know that
you love your bike.
28
00:00:52,052 --> 00:00:54,855
Gee, you spend more time with
this thing than you do with me.
29
00:00:54,955 --> 00:00:56,724
Oh, honey, don't get upset.
30
00:00:56,824 --> 00:00:57,925
Well, it's true, Dan.
31
00:00:58,025 --> 00:00:58,859
I was talking to the bike.
32
00:00:58,959 --> 00:01:00,761
[laughter]
33
00:01:03,697 --> 00:01:06,667
Well, I'm tired of
being the biker chick.
34
00:01:06,767 --> 00:01:09,069
I want the wind to hit
my body first, you know.
35
00:01:09,170 --> 00:01:10,204
[laughter]
36
00:01:10,304 --> 00:01:13,207
I want the insects to
splat across my face.
37
00:01:13,307 --> 00:01:14,975
[laughter]
38
00:01:15,075 --> 00:01:16,310
Come on, you get on the back.
39
00:01:16,410 --> 00:01:17,278
Mm.
40
00:01:17,378 --> 00:01:18,179
Come on.
41
00:01:18,279 --> 00:01:19,079
Mm.
42
00:01:23,551 --> 00:01:26,220
Wow!
43
00:01:26,320 --> 00:01:27,588
Suddenly I feel
like Ann-Margaret
44
00:01:27,688 --> 00:01:28,489
in "Kitten with a Whip."
45
00:01:28,589 --> 00:01:30,023
[laughter]
46
00:01:31,024 --> 00:01:32,226
[horn honking]
47
00:01:32,326 --> 00:01:34,027
Oh, look, it's our
favorite fun couple.
48
00:01:34,128 --> 00:01:35,663
Becky and anybody but that guy.
49
00:01:35,763 --> 00:01:37,365
[laughter]
50
00:01:37,465 --> 00:01:39,333
Oh man, he makes my skin crawl.
51
00:01:39,433 --> 00:01:42,069
Ah, honey, put on
your best fake smile.
52
00:01:42,170 --> 00:01:43,904
[laughter]
53
00:01:46,340 --> 00:01:47,241
Hi, kids!
54
00:01:47,341 --> 00:01:48,142
Hey, guys.
55
00:01:48,242 --> 00:01:50,344
Check out this car.
56
00:01:50,444 --> 00:01:52,746
Well, well, well, hey, Mark.
57
00:01:52,846 --> 00:01:54,282
What happened to your truck?
58
00:01:54,382 --> 00:01:56,083
It's my Buddy's car.
He's selling it.
59
00:01:56,184 --> 00:01:57,618
We brought it over
because Beck said you guys
60
00:01:57,718 --> 00:01:58,952
were looking to get her a car.
61
00:01:59,052 --> 00:02:01,054
Oh, we are?
62
00:02:01,155 --> 00:02:02,656
Mom, this car is cherried out.
63
00:02:02,756 --> 00:02:07,728
I mean, the frame is righteous,
no Bondo, V-8, tilt tranny.
64
00:02:07,828 --> 00:02:09,730
No Bondo?
65
00:02:09,830 --> 00:02:11,532
Not even a little?
66
00:02:11,632 --> 00:02:13,267
Wow.
67
00:02:13,367 --> 00:02:14,868
Dad, the motor's
in really good shape.
68
00:02:14,968 --> 00:02:15,869
Look at it.
69
00:02:15,969 --> 00:02:17,271
Mark did a lot of
the work himself.
70
00:02:17,371 --> 00:02:20,308
Yeah, I put in new brakes,
shocks, rebuilt the carburetor.
71
00:02:20,408 --> 00:02:21,909
Probably made
the license plates.
72
00:02:22,009 --> 00:02:23,177
[laughter]
73
00:02:23,277 --> 00:02:25,746
Hey, check out the tuna boat.
74
00:02:25,846 --> 00:02:27,248
I wanna sit in it.
75
00:02:27,348 --> 00:02:28,516
You know, this
thing has potential.
76
00:02:28,616 --> 00:02:30,083
I mean, just look at
the size back seat.
77
00:02:30,184 --> 00:02:31,919
All you gotta do is put a
little mirror on the ceiling.
78
00:02:32,019 --> 00:02:32,820
Shut up, Darlene.
79
00:02:32,920 --> 00:02:34,054
[laughter]
80
00:02:34,154 --> 00:02:36,557
Looks like you
retooled the heads.
81
00:02:36,657 --> 00:02:38,292
Yeah, new valves,
seals, everything.
82
00:02:38,392 --> 00:02:39,193
Nice work.
83
00:02:39,293 --> 00:02:40,794
And it's only $1,500.
84
00:02:40,894 --> 00:02:43,764
Thanks for bringing it by.
85
00:02:43,864 --> 00:02:44,898
Come on, dad, think about it.
86
00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:46,534
I won't need to bug
you for your car.
87
00:02:46,634 --> 00:02:48,602
Mom, you won't have to
be driving me around.
88
00:02:48,702 --> 00:02:50,804
You won't have to worry
about me banging up your car.
89
00:02:50,904 --> 00:02:52,406
Well, Becky, we
like all that stuff.
90
00:02:52,506 --> 00:02:53,841
[laughter]
91
00:02:54,875 --> 00:02:56,043
You got a nice
bike, Mr. Conner.
92
00:02:56,143 --> 00:02:57,611
You ever think of selling it?
93
00:02:57,711 --> 00:02:59,347
Actually, I'm planning
on being buried with it.
94
00:02:59,447 --> 00:03:00,581
[laughter]
95
00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:02,149
So, dad, what about the car?
96
00:03:02,250 --> 00:03:03,984
We'll talk, inside.
97
00:03:04,084 --> 00:03:06,053
[engine starting]
98
00:03:06,153 --> 00:03:06,954
DJ.
99
00:03:07,054 --> 00:03:08,922
[laughter]
100
00:03:12,326 --> 00:03:13,126
Starts good.
101
00:03:13,227 --> 00:03:15,095
[laughter]
102
00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:20,100
[dog barking]
103
00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:25,105
Listen, thanks for
bringing the car over.
104
00:03:25,205 --> 00:03:26,006
No problem.
105
00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:30,878
[cat calls]
106
00:03:34,382 --> 00:03:36,216
[laughter]
107
00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:41,855
[sigh] What's he gonna
mail you your tongue back?
108
00:03:41,955 --> 00:03:43,123
[laughter]
109
00:03:43,223 --> 00:03:45,593
[theme music]
110
00:04:24,131 --> 00:04:25,132
[laughing]
111
00:04:26,133 --> 00:04:28,536
[music playing]
112
00:04:31,104 --> 00:04:33,441
Dad, it breaks down
to like $100 a month.
113
00:04:33,541 --> 00:04:35,743
Darlene, this is
not your territory.
114
00:04:35,843 --> 00:04:37,478
Yes, but Becky's my sister.
115
00:04:37,578 --> 00:04:38,912
And what touches her touches me.
116
00:04:39,012 --> 00:04:40,881
[laughter]
117
00:04:40,981 --> 00:04:44,452
So she gets a car now, and you
maybe get one when you're 16?
118
00:04:44,552 --> 00:04:46,454
Well, you don't want me to
think that she's your favorite,
119
00:04:46,554 --> 00:04:47,955
do you?
120
00:04:48,055 --> 00:04:49,323
Well, I can live with that.
121
00:04:49,423 --> 00:04:50,223
What about you, Dan?
122
00:04:50,324 --> 00:04:51,124
[laughter]
123
00:04:51,224 --> 00:04:53,694
Hey, can we talk about me now?
124
00:04:53,794 --> 00:04:55,629
This is really important to me.
125
00:04:55,729 --> 00:04:57,431
I mean, how about if I
get a job after school?
126
00:04:57,531 --> 00:04:59,166
Well, now there's a start.
127
00:04:59,266 --> 00:05:00,133
Well, you know what?
128
00:05:00,233 --> 00:05:01,535
If we all start
socking it away now,
129
00:05:01,635 --> 00:05:02,970
maybe we can swing it by summer.
130
00:05:03,070 --> 00:05:04,405
Summer?
131
00:05:04,505 --> 00:05:06,407
Well, couldn't you guys lend
me the money now, and I'll pay
132
00:05:06,507 --> 00:05:07,875
you back after I get the job?
133
00:05:07,975 --> 00:05:09,777
Jeez, it's like $1,500, Becky.
134
00:05:09,877 --> 00:05:11,779
And that doesn't
even count insurance.
135
00:05:11,879 --> 00:05:13,614
Look, Becky, I
know how you feel.
136
00:05:13,714 --> 00:05:15,583
When I was 16, I was
dying for my dad to buy
137
00:05:15,683 --> 00:05:17,818
me this gorgeous '64 Barracuda.
138
00:05:17,918 --> 00:05:19,119
Man, that car was it.
139
00:05:19,219 --> 00:05:22,255
It had these yellow racing
stripes on this purple body.
140
00:05:22,356 --> 00:05:24,191
Dad, get out of
the wayback machine.
141
00:05:24,291 --> 00:05:25,959
[laughter]
142
00:05:26,960 --> 00:05:28,462
Look, I have $200 saved up.
143
00:05:28,562 --> 00:05:29,563
Where?
144
00:05:29,663 --> 00:05:31,365
You only got like $40
in your sock drawer.
145
00:05:31,465 --> 00:05:33,266
[laughter]
146
00:05:33,367 --> 00:05:35,202
Mother.
147
00:05:35,302 --> 00:05:38,338
Well, I got like $50
you can borrow, Beck.
148
00:05:38,439 --> 00:05:40,941
That'll just leave
you guys with $1,250.
149
00:05:41,041 --> 00:05:43,276
So what's in it for you?
150
00:05:43,377 --> 00:05:47,347
Well, I lend you the money,
interest free, and then
151
00:05:47,448 --> 00:05:48,782
when I'm 16 we share the car.
152
00:05:48,882 --> 00:05:50,784
You think I'd
share a car with you?
153
00:05:50,884 --> 00:05:52,019
No way.
154
00:05:52,119 --> 00:05:53,120
Then forget it.
155
00:05:53,220 --> 00:05:55,188
Junior Miss can take
the bus till she's 40.
156
00:05:55,288 --> 00:05:57,057
[laughter]
157
00:06:00,461 --> 00:06:01,929
I don't see why
I'm always the one
158
00:06:02,029 --> 00:06:04,064
this family who has to
make the sacrifices.
159
00:06:04,164 --> 00:06:05,232
Oh, yeah, right.
160
00:06:05,332 --> 00:06:07,435
Let's sell the villa
in France, Dan.
161
00:06:07,535 --> 00:06:08,669
We hardly ever use it.
162
00:06:08,769 --> 00:06:10,303
[laughter]
163
00:06:10,404 --> 00:06:12,305
You know, if you guys really
wanted to help me, you could.
164
00:06:15,008 --> 00:06:16,109
I hate it when
she gets like this,
165
00:06:16,209 --> 00:06:17,144
and there's nothing to eat!
166
00:06:17,244 --> 00:06:18,979
[laughter]
167
00:06:20,481 --> 00:06:22,683
I feel bad I can't
afford to buy her a car.
168
00:06:22,783 --> 00:06:24,718
Oh, she'll live.
169
00:06:24,818 --> 00:06:25,819
We've got two cars.
170
00:06:25,919 --> 00:06:27,488
She can use one at night
and on the weekends.
171
00:06:27,588 --> 00:06:29,322
Yeah, that one was
a real beauty, though.
172
00:06:29,423 --> 00:06:30,491
And she really wanted it.
173
00:06:30,591 --> 00:06:31,859
Oh, she didn't
even know she wanted
174
00:06:31,959 --> 00:06:34,161
a car till he put her up to it.
- Rosie.
175
00:06:34,261 --> 00:06:35,829
Well, it's true, Dan.
176
00:06:35,929 --> 00:06:37,965
Before she met him, the only
thing she wanted out of like
177
00:06:38,065 --> 00:06:39,567
was to see us dead.
178
00:06:39,667 --> 00:06:42,302
And now, you know, that's
not good enough for her now.
179
00:06:42,402 --> 00:06:43,571
She's gotta have a car, too.
180
00:06:43,671 --> 00:06:45,205
[laughter]
181
00:06:45,305 --> 00:06:47,508
Well, I miss the old days.
182
00:06:47,608 --> 00:06:48,509
[laughter]
183
00:06:48,609 --> 00:06:50,978
[music playing]
184
00:06:59,953 --> 00:07:01,855
[applause]
185
00:07:04,892 --> 00:07:09,563
All right, I been waiting
15 years for this moment.
186
00:07:09,663 --> 00:07:11,632
Today you are mine.
187
00:07:11,732 --> 00:07:13,033
[laughter]
188
00:07:13,133 --> 00:07:14,768
Come to mama.
189
00:07:14,868 --> 00:07:16,770
[laughter]
190
00:07:17,871 --> 00:07:18,839
[sigh]
191
00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:19,773
[engine starting]
192
00:07:19,873 --> 00:07:22,743
[singing] Get your
motor running,
193
00:07:22,843 --> 00:07:25,746
head out on the highway!
194
00:07:25,846 --> 00:07:30,217
Born to be wild!
195
00:07:30,317 --> 00:07:33,687
Born to be wild!
196
00:07:33,787 --> 00:07:36,557
Honey, honey, honey,
honey, honey, honey, honey.
197
00:07:36,657 --> 00:07:37,658
Honey, honey, look, look, look.
198
00:07:37,758 --> 00:07:39,993
Uh, before I take
you out on the bike--
199
00:07:40,093 --> 00:07:41,061
and I promised I would.
200
00:07:41,161 --> 00:07:42,663
And I will, and everything.
201
00:07:42,763 --> 00:07:44,765
There's just one thing you
gotta know about this bike.
202
00:07:44,865 --> 00:07:45,666
It's mine.
203
00:07:45,766 --> 00:07:46,567
Get off it!
204
00:07:46,667 --> 00:07:48,201
[laughter]
205
00:07:49,236 --> 00:07:51,872
Oh take a major
chill pill, daddio.
206
00:07:51,972 --> 00:07:53,173
[laughter]
207
00:07:53,273 --> 00:07:55,943
Me and this hog are going
out to tear up the highway.
208
00:07:56,043 --> 00:07:59,079
Now you can either come with
us, or you can eat my dust.
209
00:07:59,179 --> 00:08:00,413
[laughter]
210
00:08:00,514 --> 00:08:02,683
Look, maybe I should
ride it out of town first,
211
00:08:02,783 --> 00:08:05,886
and then you can take
over on the open road.
212
00:08:05,986 --> 00:08:08,121
You're just afraid that
some of your low life buddies
213
00:08:08,221 --> 00:08:10,457
will see you riding on the back
and think you're a big wuss.
214
00:08:10,558 --> 00:08:11,625
[laughter]
215
00:08:12,159 --> 00:08:12,960
Right.
216
00:08:13,060 --> 00:08:13,861
Move.
217
00:08:13,961 --> 00:08:15,128
[laughter]
218
00:08:15,228 --> 00:08:16,196
OK.
219
00:08:16,296 --> 00:08:18,966
- Hey, let's pop a wheelie!
- OK, ready?
220
00:08:19,066 --> 00:08:19,867
Ready.
221
00:08:19,967 --> 00:08:20,834
Hang on.
222
00:08:20,934 --> 00:08:21,802
OK.
223
00:08:21,902 --> 00:08:23,336
[engine starting]
224
00:08:24,638 --> 00:08:27,641
Oh, this'll be even more
fun once we start moving.
225
00:08:27,741 --> 00:08:29,109
[engine stopping]
226
00:08:29,209 --> 00:08:30,277
Now what's the matter?
227
00:08:30,377 --> 00:08:31,645
Something's wrong
with the bike.
228
00:08:31,745 --> 00:08:32,613
What are you talking about?
229
00:08:32,713 --> 00:08:33,714
It sounds great.
230
00:08:33,814 --> 00:08:35,182
It's not nearly as noisy
as it was yesterday.
231
00:08:35,282 --> 00:08:36,349
Well, I like it noisy.
232
00:08:36,449 --> 00:08:37,350
I keep it noisy.
233
00:08:37,450 --> 00:08:39,119
Somebody's been
messing around with it.
234
00:08:39,219 --> 00:08:40,888
Like somebody who knows
about carburetors.
235
00:08:44,291 --> 00:08:46,827
Becky, get down here now!
236
00:08:46,927 --> 00:08:48,061
What's going on?
237
00:08:48,161 --> 00:08:50,564
Weren't you gonna take
your brother to the movies?
238
00:08:50,664 --> 00:08:51,599
It doesn't start for an hour.
239
00:08:51,699 --> 00:08:52,766
Well, walk really slow.
240
00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:54,768
[laughter]
241
00:08:57,337 --> 00:08:58,371
I thought you were going.
242
00:08:58,471 --> 00:08:59,840
Did you and Mark
take out my Harley?
243
00:09:02,475 --> 00:09:04,111
Answer me.
244
00:09:04,211 --> 00:09:05,879
Yeah.
245
00:09:05,979 --> 00:09:07,781
You are never to
touch that bike, ever.
246
00:09:07,881 --> 00:09:09,016
You know that.
247
00:09:09,116 --> 00:09:10,918
You guys said I could
have a car on the weekend,
248
00:09:11,018 --> 00:09:13,754
and then you took both
of them last night.
249
00:09:13,854 --> 00:09:15,923
What's, so that's supposed
to make it all right?
250
00:09:16,023 --> 00:09:16,990
Dad, the bike's fine.
251
00:09:17,090 --> 00:09:19,426
Mark even adjusted the
carburetor for you.
252
00:09:19,526 --> 00:09:21,128
I never asked your punk
boyfriend for a tune up.
253
00:09:21,228 --> 00:09:22,495
And I certainly never
gave you permission
254
00:09:22,596 --> 00:09:23,764
to take that bike out, ever!
255
00:09:28,201 --> 00:09:29,102
[door slamming]
256
00:09:34,507 --> 00:09:35,408
OK, I'm sorry.
257
00:09:35,508 --> 00:09:36,476
It was a stupid thing to do.
258
00:09:36,576 --> 00:09:38,746
No, it was way beyond stupid.
259
00:09:38,846 --> 00:09:40,047
You know what this
bike means to me.
260
00:09:40,147 --> 00:09:41,649
But you figure you don't
have a car one night,
261
00:09:41,749 --> 00:09:44,284
so you just go behind
my back and take it.
262
00:09:44,384 --> 00:09:46,053
Well, if I woulda asked,
you woulda said no anyway.
263
00:09:46,153 --> 00:09:47,888
That's right!
What does that tell you?
264
00:09:51,091 --> 00:09:51,892
OK, fine.
265
00:09:51,992 --> 00:09:53,827
So how long am I grounded for?
266
00:09:53,927 --> 00:09:55,929
You don't get
it, do you, Becky?
267
00:09:56,029 --> 00:09:57,765
This isn't some little
stupid curfew you broke.
268
00:09:57,865 --> 00:09:58,666
Dad--
269
00:09:58,766 --> 00:09:59,733
No!
270
00:09:59,833 --> 00:10:01,001
You've been given us
crap for months now,
271
00:10:01,101 --> 00:10:02,736
and I've been on your side.
272
00:10:02,836 --> 00:10:04,872
I duked it out with your mom
over letting you see Mark.
273
00:10:04,972 --> 00:10:06,606
I was working with
you on this car deal.
274
00:10:06,707 --> 00:10:07,941
But you could care less.
275
00:10:08,041 --> 00:10:11,578
Well, I'm tired of bending
over backwards for you, Becky.
276
00:10:11,679 --> 00:10:13,781
So if I'm not
grounded, then what?
277
00:10:13,881 --> 00:10:15,382
Then, uh, nothing.
278
00:10:15,482 --> 00:10:16,717
I mean, what's the point?
279
00:10:16,817 --> 00:10:18,752
You're just gonna do whatever
the hell you want, anyway.
280
00:10:18,852 --> 00:10:19,753
Dad, I said I'm sorry!
281
00:10:19,853 --> 00:10:20,721
I don't care what you said.
282
00:10:20,821 --> 00:10:22,222
Just get the hell
out of my sight.
283
00:10:22,322 --> 00:10:24,692
[music playing]
284
00:10:26,760 --> 00:10:29,129
[music playing]
285
00:10:31,699 --> 00:10:34,367
So now you're going
to be a masseuse?
286
00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:35,703
How'd you come up
with that idea?
287
00:10:35,803 --> 00:10:38,005
What, did you open the phone
book to the middle and point?
288
00:10:38,105 --> 00:10:39,206
[laughter]
289
00:10:39,306 --> 00:10:41,508
I'm just sending off
for more information.
290
00:10:41,608 --> 00:10:44,678
And it's not masseuse,
it's massage therapist.
291
00:10:44,778 --> 00:10:46,113
[laughter]
292
00:10:46,213 --> 00:10:47,147
Well, so what?
293
00:10:47,247 --> 00:10:48,849
When people ask me
what my sister does,
294
00:10:48,949 --> 00:10:51,118
I have to tell them that she,
like, rubs people for money.
295
00:10:51,218 --> 00:10:52,853
[laughter]
296
00:10:52,953 --> 00:10:55,555
Shut up and give me a stamp.
297
00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:56,924
Good morning.
298
00:10:57,024 --> 00:10:59,359
Hey, Dan, Jackie's
gonna learn to be
299
00:10:59,459 --> 00:11:01,094
a masseuse through the mail.
300
00:11:01,194 --> 00:11:02,896
[laughter]
301
00:11:02,996 --> 00:11:03,997
Jeez, Jack, what happened?
302
00:11:04,097 --> 00:11:04,898
Your sea monkeys die?
303
00:11:04,998 --> 00:11:06,433
[laughter]
304
00:11:07,600 --> 00:11:10,370
Can I get a little
support around here?
305
00:11:10,470 --> 00:11:12,906
Oh, we're sorry.
306
00:11:13,006 --> 00:11:14,341
Hey, guess what.
Jackie's gonna be a--
307
00:11:14,441 --> 00:11:15,242
Shut up!
308
00:11:15,342 --> 00:11:17,077
[laughter]
309
00:11:18,111 --> 00:11:19,279
Oh, that's OK.
Go ahead, Dad.
310
00:11:19,379 --> 00:11:20,180
No, that's OK.
311
00:11:20,280 --> 00:11:21,481
I gotta get to the job site.
312
00:11:24,885 --> 00:11:26,854
So what are you
gonna do today, Becky?
313
00:11:26,954 --> 00:11:28,021
I gotta go to the library.
314
00:11:28,121 --> 00:11:29,823
I have a report due on Monday.
315
00:11:29,923 --> 00:11:32,192
Oh, Dan, maybe you
could drop her off.
316
00:11:32,292 --> 00:11:33,727
The library?
317
00:11:33,827 --> 00:11:36,096
I don't know.
318
00:11:36,196 --> 00:11:37,364
Yeah, sure you do, honey.
319
00:11:37,464 --> 00:11:38,732
You remember it
from high school.
320
00:11:38,832 --> 00:11:39,632
That--
321
00:11:39,733 --> 00:11:40,834
[laughter]
322
00:11:40,934 --> 00:11:43,003
--that big brick building
we used to smoke behind.
323
00:11:43,103 --> 00:11:44,437
[laughter]
324
00:11:44,537 --> 00:11:45,338
I'm late.
325
00:11:45,438 --> 00:11:46,606
Bye bye.
326
00:11:46,706 --> 00:11:47,507
Bye, dad.
327
00:11:53,313 --> 00:11:54,782
I'll give you a ride, Becky.
328
00:11:54,882 --> 00:11:56,549
That's OK.
329
00:11:56,649 --> 00:11:59,086
I'll see you later.
330
00:11:59,186 --> 00:11:59,987
Damn.
331
00:12:00,087 --> 00:12:00,888
Yeah.
332
00:12:00,988 --> 00:12:01,789
It's that Mark.
333
00:12:01,889 --> 00:12:04,758
Oh, here we go.
334
00:12:04,858 --> 00:12:06,093
What are you doing?
335
00:12:06,193 --> 00:12:08,661
You finished breakfast.
336
00:12:08,762 --> 00:12:10,530
Why don't you go rub somebody?
337
00:12:10,630 --> 00:12:11,631
[laughter]
338
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:14,134
Look, if it was gonna
make you that crazy,
339
00:12:14,234 --> 00:12:15,135
why'd you let Becky see Mark?
340
00:12:15,235 --> 00:12:16,036
I didn't.
341
00:12:16,136 --> 00:12:16,937
Dan did.
342
00:12:17,037 --> 00:12:18,271
Well, you agreed.
343
00:12:18,371 --> 00:12:21,108
Well, she's just
gonna go see him anyway.
344
00:12:21,208 --> 00:12:22,742
So you caved.
345
00:12:22,843 --> 00:12:23,777
No, we didn't cave.
346
00:12:23,877 --> 00:12:24,711
OK.
347
00:12:24,812 --> 00:12:27,114
OK, we did cave,
but on our terms.
348
00:12:27,214 --> 00:12:28,015
[laughter]
349
00:12:28,115 --> 00:12:29,749
Roseanne.
350
00:12:29,850 --> 00:12:30,650
I hate that kid.
351
00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:32,019
He drives me nuts.
352
00:12:32,119 --> 00:12:34,254
You know them to pieces of hair
he's got going on his face,
353
00:12:34,354 --> 00:12:35,222
like that?
JACKIE: Yes.
354
00:12:35,322 --> 00:12:36,957
Well, I hate those
pieces of hair.
355
00:12:37,057 --> 00:12:38,025
I hate both of them.
356
00:12:38,125 --> 00:12:39,927
Sometimes I just sit
up there in that chair,
357
00:12:40,027 --> 00:12:41,795
and I try to figure out
which one I hate worst!
358
00:12:41,895 --> 00:12:43,130
[laughter]
359
00:12:43,230 --> 00:12:45,799
You're losing it!
360
00:12:45,899 --> 00:12:47,134
Oh, catch up, Jackie.
361
00:12:47,234 --> 00:12:48,869
I have already lost it.
362
00:12:48,969 --> 00:12:50,737
[laughter]
363
00:12:50,838 --> 00:12:55,575
And now-- now there
are no doughnuts!
364
00:12:55,675 --> 00:12:57,544
[laughter]
365
00:12:57,644 --> 00:12:59,980
[music playing]
366
00:13:07,454 --> 00:13:08,822
[knocking]
367
00:13:16,796 --> 00:13:19,632
Oh, man.
368
00:13:19,732 --> 00:13:22,269
What do you want?
369
00:13:22,369 --> 00:13:27,074
Well, I wanna know what's
the deal between you and Becky.
370
00:13:27,174 --> 00:13:28,942
What are you asking me for?
Why don't you ask her?
371
00:13:29,042 --> 00:13:30,710
Because I don't
know her anymore.
372
00:13:30,810 --> 00:13:32,980
Ever since she got with you, she
lies, she ran away from home.
373
00:13:33,080 --> 00:13:34,781
You've got her
stealing motorcycles.
374
00:13:34,882 --> 00:13:37,317
So I just want you to tell
me, Mark, what's next.
375
00:13:37,417 --> 00:13:39,819
You know, just so that
I'm not surprised.
376
00:13:39,920 --> 00:13:41,754
Well, I'd figure I'd get her
to knock over a convenience
377
00:13:41,855 --> 00:13:42,890
store or two.
378
00:13:42,990 --> 00:13:46,259
But don't worry, I'll
have her back by 10:00.
379
00:13:46,359 --> 00:13:49,829
You think that's so funny,
don't you, you little punk?
380
00:13:49,930 --> 00:13:51,398
Look, this is my
place that you're in.
381
00:13:51,498 --> 00:13:54,267
If you're gonna talk to me
like that, you can just leave.
382
00:13:54,367 --> 00:13:55,568
I want you to stop seeing her.
383
00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:57,905
No.
384
00:13:58,005 --> 00:13:59,672
Why?
385
00:13:59,772 --> 00:14:00,840
Why, Mark?
386
00:14:00,941 --> 00:14:02,642
Are you sleeping with her?
387
00:14:02,742 --> 00:14:04,044
Because if you
are, I'm gonna have
388
00:14:04,144 --> 00:14:06,079
your butt in jail so fast you
won't even know what hit you.
389
00:14:06,179 --> 00:14:07,814
She's 16 and you're 18.
390
00:14:07,915 --> 00:14:10,083
And in case you don't know
it, that's illegal, buddy.
391
00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:14,821
I don't even know what
I'm asking you for.
392
00:14:14,922 --> 00:14:17,257
I don't believe nothing
you say, anyhow.
393
00:14:17,357 --> 00:14:20,027
I don't care.
394
00:14:20,127 --> 00:14:22,195
You have nothing
in common with her.
395
00:14:22,295 --> 00:14:23,897
I like her.
396
00:14:23,997 --> 00:14:24,898
Why?
397
00:14:24,998 --> 00:14:25,798
What do you mean, why?
398
00:14:25,899 --> 00:14:27,067
Don't you?
399
00:14:27,167 --> 00:14:28,368
Oh, don't give me that crap.
400
00:14:28,468 --> 00:14:29,336
[laughter]
401
00:14:29,436 --> 00:14:30,470
It's not crap.
402
00:14:30,570 --> 00:14:32,372
I like her and she likes me.
403
00:14:32,472 --> 00:14:34,807
And you can threaten me, and
your husband can threaten me,
404
00:14:34,908 --> 00:14:36,743
but it's not gonna change
a thing, and you know that.
405
00:14:39,846 --> 00:14:40,747
[sigh]
406
00:14:42,349 --> 00:14:45,218
Yeah, I do know it.
407
00:14:45,318 --> 00:14:46,553
I can't compete with you, Mark.
408
00:14:46,653 --> 00:14:48,888
I'm only her mother.
409
00:14:48,989 --> 00:14:49,822
[sigh]
410
00:14:50,924 --> 00:14:52,192
I hope you really
do care about her.
411
00:14:57,998 --> 00:14:58,798
Mrs. Conner.
412
00:15:09,509 --> 00:15:10,944
Tell your husband he
shouldn't open his carb
413
00:15:11,044 --> 00:15:12,079
all the way up
unless he's tooling
414
00:15:12,179 --> 00:15:15,848
around at some high altitude.
415
00:15:15,949 --> 00:15:19,419
Yeah, well, the next
time we're discussing
416
00:15:19,519 --> 00:15:21,521
carbs I'll be sure
to bring that up.
417
00:15:21,621 --> 00:15:23,456
[laughter]
418
00:15:27,427 --> 00:15:29,262
[laughter]
419
00:15:32,265 --> 00:15:33,200
That's much better.
420
00:15:33,300 --> 00:15:34,634
[laughter]
421
00:15:34,734 --> 00:15:36,603
[applause]
422
00:15:36,703 --> 00:15:39,039
[music playing]
423
00:15:45,445 --> 00:15:47,314
DARLENE: Your bike sounds
pretty bad now, dad.
424
00:15:47,414 --> 00:15:49,482
Yeah, the secret is to
open up the carb all the way.
425
00:15:49,582 --> 00:15:50,817
[laughter]
426
00:15:50,917 --> 00:15:52,185
Excuse me.
427
00:15:52,285 --> 00:15:54,754
Sorry.
428
00:15:54,854 --> 00:15:56,156
Hey there, Beckface.
429
00:15:56,256 --> 00:15:57,390
Hey.
430
00:15:57,490 --> 00:16:00,760
Hey, Darlene, how about
one of the old man's
431
00:16:00,860 --> 00:16:03,096
patented chocolate
chip milkshakes?
432
00:16:03,196 --> 00:16:04,164
Sure, I could use a rush.
433
00:16:04,264 --> 00:16:05,432
[laughter]
434
00:16:06,833 --> 00:16:11,638
OK, let's see, ice cream,
chocolate syrup, skim milk.
435
00:16:11,738 --> 00:16:13,140
I think we're all set.
436
00:16:13,240 --> 00:16:14,041
Blender.
437
00:16:14,141 --> 00:16:16,209
Blender.
438
00:16:16,309 --> 00:16:17,110
OK.
439
00:16:17,210 --> 00:16:19,179
Excuse me.
440
00:16:19,279 --> 00:16:21,448
Darlene, what's your pleasure?
441
00:16:21,548 --> 00:16:23,683
Thick thick, medium
thick, or thin thick?
442
00:16:23,783 --> 00:16:24,984
Medium thick.
443
00:16:25,085 --> 00:16:28,321
All right, chicken.
444
00:16:28,421 --> 00:16:30,723
OK, stand back, let
the doctor do his work.
445
00:16:52,645 --> 00:16:55,014
Becky?
446
00:16:55,115 --> 00:16:58,017
What's up?
447
00:16:58,118 --> 00:16:59,986
You want a milkshake?
448
00:17:00,087 --> 00:17:00,887
Thick thick?
449
00:17:03,856 --> 00:17:06,126
OK.
450
00:17:06,226 --> 00:17:08,228
Listen, I've got an idea.
451
00:17:08,328 --> 00:17:09,896
Why don't I cut out
the silent treatment,
452
00:17:09,996 --> 00:17:11,764
and you can forget
that I'm your father
453
00:17:11,864 --> 00:17:13,066
and treat me like a human being.
454
00:17:13,166 --> 00:17:13,966
Deal?
455
00:17:16,436 --> 00:17:17,337
Look, dad, I'm really sorry.
456
00:17:17,437 --> 00:17:18,238
I know.
457
00:17:22,409 --> 00:17:24,277
[laughter]
458
00:17:27,347 --> 00:17:30,817
So, what have you been up
to the last couple days?
459
00:17:30,917 --> 00:17:33,420
You still like this Mark guy?
460
00:17:33,520 --> 00:17:34,821
Yeah.
461
00:17:34,921 --> 00:17:36,923
And I know you think it was has
his idea to take out the bike.
462
00:17:37,023 --> 00:17:37,957
But it wasn't.
463
00:17:38,057 --> 00:17:38,858
It was mine.
464
00:17:38,958 --> 00:17:39,792
I know.
465
00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:41,594
It's that rebel Conner thing.
466
00:17:41,694 --> 00:17:42,995
It runs in the family.
467
00:17:43,096 --> 00:17:44,197
[laughter]
468
00:17:44,297 --> 00:17:45,598
And I want you to know I'm
not gonna stand for it.
469
00:17:45,698 --> 00:17:46,733
[laughter]
470
00:17:46,833 --> 00:17:49,536
I just don't want you
to hate Mark, you know.
471
00:17:49,636 --> 00:17:51,871
- I don't hate Mark.
- Mom does.
472
00:17:51,971 --> 00:17:53,240
Oh, mom definitely hates him.
473
00:17:53,340 --> 00:17:54,641
[laughter]
474
00:17:56,143 --> 00:17:58,945
Definitely.
475
00:17:59,045 --> 00:18:01,314
Hate.
476
00:18:01,414 --> 00:18:02,315
Mom does, yes.
477
00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:03,983
[laughter]
478
00:18:04,517 --> 00:18:05,252
Why?
479
00:18:05,352 --> 00:18:07,420
She doesn't even know him.
480
00:18:07,520 --> 00:18:10,590
She's afraid of him, Becky.
481
00:18:10,690 --> 00:18:13,826
You see, when she was 16, this
guy pulled in her driveway
482
00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:15,662
with a motorcycle.
483
00:18:15,762 --> 00:18:17,964
And god, your grandma
hated that guy.
484
00:18:18,064 --> 00:18:19,199
[laughter]
485
00:18:20,233 --> 00:18:21,368
And I think that's
half the reason
486
00:18:21,468 --> 00:18:24,337
why your mom married him.
487
00:18:24,437 --> 00:18:25,805
Dad, I'm not gonna marry him.
488
00:18:25,905 --> 00:18:27,607
I mean, jeez, I'm 16 years old.
489
00:18:27,707 --> 00:18:29,276
That's exactly what
she told her folks.
490
00:18:29,376 --> 00:18:31,878
And here we are.
491
00:18:31,978 --> 00:18:35,748
I mean it, dad, I'm way too
young to think about marriage.
492
00:18:35,848 --> 00:18:37,350
Anyway, I'd have to
live with him first.
493
00:18:37,450 --> 00:18:39,085
Excuse me a moment.
494
00:18:39,186 --> 00:18:41,020
[laughter]
495
00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:48,995
Dad, cut it out.
496
00:18:49,095 --> 00:18:51,498
I mean, you know I want
to, like, go to Europe,
497
00:18:51,598 --> 00:18:55,268
and go to college, and
have a career, and stuff.
498
00:18:55,368 --> 00:18:57,937
Well, how would we know that?
499
00:18:58,037 --> 00:19:01,908
I mean, the last time you
and I talked like this, you
500
00:19:02,008 --> 00:19:03,310
wanted to be a fairy princess.
501
00:19:03,410 --> 00:19:04,611
[laughter]
502
00:19:06,446 --> 00:19:08,014
I guess it's been a while.
503
00:19:08,114 --> 00:19:09,649
Yeah, and from what
we've been hearing,
504
00:19:09,749 --> 00:19:11,818
your whole life is Mark.
505
00:19:11,918 --> 00:19:13,286
Well, it's not.
506
00:19:13,386 --> 00:19:14,621
Well, tell your mom that.
507
00:19:19,459 --> 00:19:20,860
Thick thick?
508
00:19:20,960 --> 00:19:21,761
Yeah.
509
00:19:26,533 --> 00:19:28,701
Dad.
510
00:19:28,801 --> 00:19:31,170
[sentimental music]
511
00:19:42,549 --> 00:19:44,217
Been a long time for that, too.
512
00:19:47,820 --> 00:19:50,189
[music playing]
513
00:19:52,225 --> 00:19:54,060
[laughter]
514
00:19:59,031 --> 00:20:00,066
Too thick, Beck?
515
00:20:00,166 --> 00:20:01,033
[laughter]
516
00:20:02,034 --> 00:20:03,536
I think I just broke a rib.
517
00:20:03,636 --> 00:20:05,238
[laughter]
518
00:20:05,338 --> 00:20:06,973
Here, try a spoon.
519
00:20:07,073 --> 00:20:08,408
- Thanks.
- You got it.
520
00:20:08,508 --> 00:20:09,576
[door closing]
- Oh, gross.
521
00:20:09,676 --> 00:20:10,910
[laughter]
522
00:20:12,512 --> 00:20:13,313
Hey.
523
00:20:13,413 --> 00:20:15,214
Hey.
524
00:20:15,315 --> 00:20:16,215
What's going on?
525
00:20:16,316 --> 00:20:17,116
Nothing.
526
00:20:17,216 --> 00:20:18,117
Not much.
527
00:20:18,217 --> 00:20:19,319
Oh, please.
528
00:20:19,419 --> 00:20:20,920
Dad and Becky made up,
and they're being so nice
529
00:20:21,020 --> 00:20:21,954
to each other it's pathetic.
530
00:20:22,054 --> 00:20:23,890
[laughter]
531
00:20:23,990 --> 00:20:28,395
Is that your, uh, world famous
chocolate chip shake, Dan?
532
00:20:28,495 --> 00:20:30,597
Thick thick.
Want one?
533
00:20:30,697 --> 00:20:32,299
Nope, I'm back on my diet.
534
00:20:34,967 --> 00:20:36,669
You know she's coming back.
535
00:20:36,769 --> 00:20:37,670
Oh, what the hell.
536
00:20:37,770 --> 00:20:39,138
[laughter]
537
00:20:39,238 --> 00:20:41,541
[music playing]
538
00:20:41,641 --> 00:20:43,943
[applause]
539
00:20:50,317 --> 00:20:54,454
OK, there oughta be
a spot right about--
540
00:20:54,554 --> 00:20:55,722
Ah.
541
00:20:55,822 --> 00:20:56,623
--there.
542
00:20:56,723 --> 00:20:58,391
See?
543
00:20:58,491 --> 00:20:59,426
Mark that page.
544
00:20:59,526 --> 00:21:01,027
All right.
545
00:21:01,127 --> 00:21:04,263
Now just relax.
546
00:21:04,364 --> 00:21:06,466
Let all the worries go.
547
00:21:06,566 --> 00:21:08,735
Ah.
548
00:21:08,835 --> 00:21:10,236
That's it.
549
00:21:10,337 --> 00:21:12,038
Oh, all right.
550
00:21:12,138 --> 00:21:15,375
Why don't you tell
me about the trip
551
00:21:15,475 --> 00:21:19,145
that you and Dan
took on the bike?
552
00:21:19,245 --> 00:21:21,581
Oh, it was just
awesome, you know.
553
00:21:21,681 --> 00:21:26,218
There we were, going down the
highway, Dan sitting behind me,
554
00:21:26,319 --> 00:21:29,088
totally helpless,
hoarse from screaming.
555
00:21:29,188 --> 00:21:32,359
There, now all those
muscles are lose.
556
00:21:32,459 --> 00:21:33,259
Oh.
557
00:21:33,360 --> 00:21:35,061
All the tension's gone.
558
00:21:35,161 --> 00:21:35,962
Oh.
559
00:21:36,062 --> 00:21:37,430
[horn honking]
560
00:21:37,530 --> 00:21:38,331
Hi, Beck.
561
00:21:38,431 --> 00:21:39,432
Hi, bye!
562
00:21:39,532 --> 00:21:40,667
Where you going?
563
00:21:40,767 --> 00:21:42,034
Out with Mark.
564
00:21:42,134 --> 00:21:43,235
I'm tense.
[door closing]
565
00:21:43,336 --> 00:21:44,737
I'm tense!
[laughter]
566
00:21:44,837 --> 00:21:45,638
OK.
567
00:21:45,738 --> 00:21:46,539
Oh!
568
00:21:46,639 --> 00:21:48,040
[music playing]
569
00:21:52,645 --> 00:21:55,281
[music playing]
570
00:21:55,331 --> 00:21:59,881
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