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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:54,287 --> 00:00:59,258 -This is "Dude Bro Party Massacre III." 2 00:00:59,260 --> 00:01:00,826 -What you doing, buddy? 3 00:01:00,828 --> 00:01:02,795 You mowing the lawn? 4 00:01:47,707 --> 00:01:50,309 - D-u-u-ude! 5 00:01:50,710 --> 00:01:53,712 -Br-o-o-o-o! 6 00:01:53,714 --> 00:01:57,316 -P-a-a-arty! 7 00:01:57,318 --> 00:01:59,585 - Massacre! 8 00:01:59,587 --> 00:02:02,588 -Three. 9 00:02:02,590 --> 00:02:04,556 Three times this week you've been in here, 10 00:02:04,558 --> 00:02:07,826 and you've yet to tell me why you keep saying "massacre." 11 00:02:07,828 --> 00:02:09,361 -It was just so painful. 12 00:02:09,363 --> 00:02:10,829 There was so much blood. 13 00:02:10,831 --> 00:02:13,699 -Brock... 14 00:02:13,701 --> 00:02:15,834 This is a safe place. 15 00:02:15,836 --> 00:02:17,536 I need you to open up. 16 00:02:19,806 --> 00:02:21,874 This is about those two previous mass murders 17 00:02:21,876 --> 00:02:23,709 on Frat Row, isn't it? 18 00:02:23,711 --> 00:02:26,211 I don't know if I can talk about that. 19 00:02:26,213 --> 00:02:28,247 It's just... 20 00:02:28,249 --> 00:02:28,914 so painful. 21 00:02:28,916 --> 00:02:30,749 Okay. I'll try. 22 00:02:30,751 --> 00:02:32,451 The first party massacre started 23 00:02:32,453 --> 00:02:35,487 with a panty raid gone wrong. 24 00:02:35,489 --> 00:02:38,457 The sorority house mother was pissed. 25 00:02:38,459 --> 00:02:41,260 No one taught her how to open doors. 26 00:02:41,262 --> 00:02:43,262 But she learned. 27 00:02:43,264 --> 00:02:46,298 And she was out for revenge. 28 00:02:46,300 --> 00:02:48,567 -Oh! Little help, bro? 29 00:02:48,569 --> 00:02:50,802 Wh-- Wha-- Oh, no! 30 00:02:50,804 --> 00:02:52,704 -Road Doggie was her first victim. 31 00:02:52,706 --> 00:02:54,673 -Daddy's bro. Ugh... 32 00:02:54,675 --> 00:02:57,276 -Next, she went after Cindy and C-Trunk. 33 00:02:57,278 --> 00:02:58,410 -Oh, C-Trunk. 34 00:02:58,412 --> 00:02:59,811 Oh, C-Trunk! 35 00:03:02,483 --> 00:03:04,950 -What's taking you bros so long to shower?! 36 00:03:04,952 --> 00:03:06,618 -But when she killed Coach Handsey, 37 00:03:06,620 --> 00:03:07,853 I had to wonder... -Aah! 38 00:03:07,855 --> 00:03:08,787 -...was she on our side? 39 00:03:08,789 --> 00:03:10,322 -Good throw. 40 00:03:10,324 --> 00:03:11,456 -She wasn't! -Aah! 41 00:03:11,458 --> 00:03:12,658 -Whoa! -Ohh! 42 00:03:12,660 --> 00:03:14,459 -She hunted us down! 43 00:03:15,728 --> 00:03:18,630 Frat Row was no longer a street. 44 00:03:18,632 --> 00:03:20,432 It was...a river... 45 00:03:20,434 --> 00:03:22,267 -Ohh! -...of blood! 46 00:03:27,774 --> 00:03:30,742 It was the death of Scooter that rallied us together. 47 00:03:30,744 --> 00:03:34,346 -Aah! 48 00:03:34,348 --> 00:03:36,848 -The house mother was dead, see? 49 00:03:36,850 --> 00:03:39,885 And I became a full Delta Bi Theta. 50 00:03:39,887 --> 00:03:41,853 But little did we know... 51 00:03:41,855 --> 00:03:44,323 mother had a daughter. 52 00:03:45,558 --> 00:03:49,428 Anyway, junior year, we raged even harder. 53 00:03:50,930 --> 00:03:53,332 We thought we were gonna live forever. 54 00:03:53,334 --> 00:03:54,366 -And then fire... 55 00:03:54,368 --> 00:03:55,601 -We were wrong. 56 00:03:55,603 --> 00:03:57,502 -Could you hold my hair back, bro? 57 00:03:57,504 --> 00:04:00,005 -Someone took her place. 58 00:04:02,909 --> 00:04:04,876 Motherface. 59 00:04:04,878 --> 00:04:08,647 The junior-year streaking contest was under way. 60 00:04:08,649 --> 00:04:09,948 I was supposed to officiate, 61 00:04:09,950 --> 00:04:12,384 but I couldn't go because I got pink eye. 62 00:04:12,386 --> 00:04:15,988 That fart on my face saved my life. 63 00:04:21,794 --> 00:04:25,631 Too bad I couldn't say the same for Jimmy Galoshes. 64 00:04:31,738 --> 00:04:34,773 No one was safe from her wrath... 65 00:04:34,775 --> 00:04:36,575 -Yeah. "Areolas." Gonna masturbate. 66 00:04:36,577 --> 00:04:37,809 -...not even Little Spoon. 67 00:04:37,811 --> 00:04:39,645 -Aah. 68 00:04:39,647 --> 00:04:42,648 -Not Timmy and Tommy, the Birdstone twins. 69 00:04:45,952 --> 00:04:47,686 -Look, babe -- no hands! 70 00:04:47,688 --> 00:04:50,622 Not concert pianist Chaz Noodlemen. 71 00:04:50,624 --> 00:04:51,556 -Aah! Aah! Aah! 72 00:04:51,558 --> 00:04:53,725 -Aah! Aah! 73 00:04:55,395 --> 00:04:58,297 -Not even our weed dealer. 74 00:04:58,299 --> 00:05:00,065 There was no way to deal with the stress. 75 00:05:00,967 --> 00:05:02,934 -Aaaah! 76 00:05:02,936 --> 00:05:05,003 -Randall went on to have three kids. 77 00:05:05,005 --> 00:05:06,672 He seems happy. I'm actually grabbing lunch 78 00:05:06,674 --> 00:05:07,839 with him tomorrow. 79 00:05:07,841 --> 00:05:11,710 But then she killed Dolphman. 80 00:05:11,712 --> 00:05:14,446 It was Delta Bi genocide. 81 00:05:14,448 --> 00:05:15,814 But in the end, 82 00:05:15,816 --> 00:05:18,450 thanks to our good looks and bond of brotherhood, 83 00:05:18,452 --> 00:05:21,987 the Delta Bis triumphed once more. 84 00:05:21,989 --> 00:05:25,657 -Looks like your flame... retarded. 85 00:05:25,659 --> 00:05:28,560 -I projected an air of cool, calm confidence, 86 00:05:28,562 --> 00:05:29,995 'cause I'm Brock, you know? 87 00:05:29,997 --> 00:05:31,730 But something in her eyes -- 88 00:05:31,732 --> 00:05:35,100 something told me that nothing could stop Motherface. 89 00:05:36,102 --> 00:05:39,004 ...not even the grave. 90 00:05:40,440 --> 00:05:41,840 -Brock! 91 00:05:41,842 --> 00:05:44,376 The serial killer known as Motherface is dead. 92 00:05:44,378 --> 00:05:46,478 You told me you killed her yourself. 93 00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:48,380 It's time you take your life... 94 00:05:49,615 --> 00:05:51,683 ...back. 95 00:05:51,685 --> 00:05:53,352 -Thank God my twin brother Brent 96 00:05:53,354 --> 00:05:56,054 didn't want to get involved in the Greek system. 97 00:05:56,056 --> 00:05:58,056 We used to be so close. 98 00:05:58,058 --> 00:05:59,624 We haven't talked that much since we went 99 00:05:59,626 --> 00:06:02,861 to different colleges, but I still... 100 00:06:02,863 --> 00:06:04,830 feel him... 101 00:06:04,832 --> 00:06:06,798 like we have some sort of... 102 00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:09,634 psychological connection. 103 00:06:09,636 --> 00:06:14,005 -Brock, I need you to tell me what you're most afraid of. 104 00:06:14,007 --> 00:06:16,775 -Besides seeing all my bros killed before my very eyes? 105 00:06:16,777 --> 00:06:17,909 -Yes, besides that. 106 00:06:17,911 --> 00:06:20,946 Please, tell me everything. 107 00:06:20,948 --> 00:06:22,714 -I don't know. 108 00:06:22,716 --> 00:06:24,716 After watching 17 of my best friends 109 00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:27,452 get killed by some crazy lady, 110 00:06:27,454 --> 00:06:30,422 I guess you could say I'm a little bit afraid of women. 111 00:06:30,424 --> 00:06:31,690 -Well, then it looks like we're gonna have to 112 00:06:31,692 --> 00:06:33,558 cut this session short. 113 00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:35,127 -Oh, I thought we were making good progress. 114 00:06:35,129 --> 00:06:36,962 Really? What are you doing?! 115 00:07:00,887 --> 00:07:03,622 -Aah! Damn it, Brock Chirino, you punk! 116 00:07:03,624 --> 00:07:05,023 You're gonna kill someone with that thing! 117 00:07:05,025 --> 00:07:08,727 -No. Ernest, that's Brent Chirino, 118 00:07:08,729 --> 00:07:10,095 Brock's twin brother. 119 00:07:10,097 --> 00:07:11,797 He transferred here after Brock was killed 120 00:07:11,799 --> 00:07:15,600 in that brutal freak accident. -Oh. 121 00:07:15,602 --> 00:07:18,770 You know I've been trying to work on my temper, Sebastian. 122 00:07:18,772 --> 00:07:20,906 Brock was the coolest. 123 00:07:26,846 --> 00:07:29,080 -Hey, there goes that sexy Brent Chirino. 124 00:07:29,082 --> 00:07:30,882 Too bad his twin brother died. 125 00:07:30,884 --> 00:07:32,784 I would've loved to have been the meat 126 00:07:32,786 --> 00:07:34,486 in that Chirino sandwich. 127 00:07:34,488 --> 00:07:36,455 -Yeah, at least Brock wore a helmet! 128 00:07:36,457 --> 00:07:38,857 I'm looking at you, Brent! 129 00:07:38,859 --> 00:07:40,659 If you're hiding any drugs in your butthole, missy, 130 00:07:40,661 --> 00:07:43,595 I swear to God... 131 00:07:46,866 --> 00:07:49,100 -Brent... 132 00:07:49,102 --> 00:07:51,136 -Look out! 133 00:07:51,138 --> 00:07:52,471 -Brent. 134 00:07:52,473 --> 00:07:54,206 -There's still time! 135 00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:57,542 -Unh! 136 00:08:04,084 --> 00:08:06,184 You really threw me for a loop. 137 00:08:06,186 --> 00:08:08,820 I was on the edge of my seat. 138 00:08:08,822 --> 00:08:12,624 Say, aren't you that fella whose cool brother was murdered? 139 00:08:12,626 --> 00:08:13,758 -Whatever. 140 00:08:13,760 --> 00:08:15,494 I don't want to talk about it. 141 00:08:15,496 --> 00:08:17,028 -Well, name's Nedry -- 142 00:08:17,030 --> 00:08:18,263 Nedry Headcheese. 143 00:08:18,265 --> 00:08:19,531 -Chirino -- 144 00:08:19,533 --> 00:08:20,966 Brent Chirino. 145 00:08:20,968 --> 00:08:22,801 -I think you'll find I have a lot to offer 146 00:08:22,803 --> 00:08:24,236 as a best friend. 147 00:08:24,238 --> 00:08:26,972 -Whatever, man. I'm not here to make friends. 148 00:08:26,974 --> 00:08:29,574 I'm here to find out who murdered my brother 149 00:08:29,576 --> 00:08:31,910 and get revenge. 150 00:08:31,912 --> 00:08:34,112 -Say, isn't this the frat 151 00:08:34,114 --> 00:08:36,181 your murdered brother belonged to? 152 00:08:41,120 --> 00:08:42,787 Maybe we could pledge together, 153 00:08:42,789 --> 00:08:45,690 find out what really happened to your brother. 154 00:08:45,692 --> 00:08:46,558 I always thought... 155 00:08:46,560 --> 00:08:47,559 -I promised myself 156 00:08:47,561 --> 00:08:49,928 I would never join a fraternity. 157 00:08:49,930 --> 00:08:52,030 I already had one brother. 158 00:08:52,032 --> 00:08:56,668 I don't need any other brothers. 159 00:08:56,670 --> 00:08:58,670 -And that's why, even though a pack of wolves 160 00:08:58,672 --> 00:08:59,971 took the use of my legs, 161 00:08:59,973 --> 00:09:03,074 I decided to become a zoology major. 162 00:09:03,076 --> 00:09:05,710 My whole family was once murdered by wolves. 163 00:09:10,583 --> 00:09:12,617 -Well, well, well... 164 00:09:12,619 --> 00:09:15,086 If it isn't Brock Chirino, back from the dead. 165 00:09:15,088 --> 00:09:19,691 -Actually, I'm Brock's twin brother, Brent. 166 00:09:19,693 --> 00:09:22,160 -Weird. 167 00:09:22,162 --> 00:09:23,695 Hey, you looking to pledge? 168 00:09:23,697 --> 00:09:25,564 Great to have you aboard Delta Bi. 169 00:09:25,566 --> 00:09:26,998 -Oh, I -- -But I -- 170 00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:28,300 I understand, you know? 171 00:09:28,302 --> 00:09:29,334 If you need some more time to get over 172 00:09:29,336 --> 00:09:31,836 your brother's tragic death... 173 00:09:31,838 --> 00:09:33,238 -No. 174 00:09:33,240 --> 00:09:34,773 I'm done grieving. 175 00:09:34,775 --> 00:09:37,909 I'm ready to party until my pants fall off. 176 00:09:39,645 --> 00:09:41,046 -Welcome to Delta Bi Theta. 177 00:09:41,048 --> 00:09:43,014 I think you're gonna fit right in with the guys. 178 00:09:43,016 --> 00:09:45,250 I'm Derek. I'm the friendliest guy you'll meet here. 179 00:09:45,252 --> 00:09:46,585 -Shut the fuck up, Derek! 180 00:09:46,587 --> 00:09:48,853 -Nice comeback, bro. 181 00:09:48,855 --> 00:09:50,622 Don't mind the camera. That's Z.Q. 182 00:09:50,624 --> 00:09:53,258 You should see the workout tapes he makes of us bros. 183 00:09:53,260 --> 00:09:56,127 They're very...artistic. 184 00:09:56,129 --> 00:09:58,597 -Hi. -Hello. 185 00:09:58,599 --> 00:10:00,765 -Come on. Let's go inside. 186 00:10:12,011 --> 00:10:13,979 -Siskel and Ebert say "Pizza Goblins" 187 00:10:13,981 --> 00:10:15,246 is "family magic." 188 00:10:15,248 --> 00:10:16,982 "Two thumbs way down." 189 00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:20,218 -Dragons fr-- 190 00:10:23,289 --> 00:10:24,823 -Welcome to Delta Bi. 191 00:10:24,825 --> 00:10:28,026 You'll see that the party never stops here. 192 00:10:28,028 --> 00:10:30,929 That's Spike. He rages harder than any of us. 193 00:10:32,765 --> 00:10:34,165 Classic Spike. 194 00:10:34,167 --> 00:10:35,634 That there is Sizzler. 195 00:10:35,636 --> 00:10:37,002 He's trying to pledge Delta Bi, 196 00:10:37,004 --> 00:10:39,371 but he won't get in 'cause he's a vegetarian. 197 00:10:39,373 --> 00:10:40,338 -What? 198 00:10:44,944 --> 00:10:46,911 -This here is Samzy. 199 00:10:46,913 --> 00:10:48,813 He has a lot of memories of your brother. 200 00:10:55,287 --> 00:10:59,324 -I made them just like you like them, Samzy -- overhard. 201 00:11:00,192 --> 00:11:02,160 - Pretty nice. - Overhard. 202 00:11:02,162 --> 00:11:04,262 Like you, Samzy. 203 00:11:04,264 --> 00:11:05,764 -Sorry. 204 00:11:05,766 --> 00:11:07,932 Samzy's a bit of a bitch. 205 00:11:07,934 --> 00:11:11,036 -Oh. That explains it. 206 00:11:17,977 --> 00:11:19,144 -This is Todd. 207 00:11:19,146 --> 00:11:21,212 We call him T-O-Double-D for short. 208 00:11:21,214 --> 00:11:23,148 He's pre-med. Smartest guy in the frat. 209 00:11:23,150 --> 00:11:24,182 -Ohh! 210 00:11:24,184 --> 00:11:25,717 Jesus, Derek, not now! 211 00:11:25,719 --> 00:11:27,452 I got a lot on my mind. 212 00:11:27,454 --> 00:11:29,320 Look at all my work that I'm doing. 213 00:11:29,322 --> 00:11:31,823 With midterms and finals for everyone, what... 214 00:11:34,794 --> 00:11:37,095 Brock? -Oh, this is actually Brent, 215 00:11:37,097 --> 00:11:39,364 Brock's twin brother. 216 00:11:39,366 --> 00:11:40,331 -Weird. 217 00:11:41,333 --> 00:11:42,934 -Surprise! -No! 218 00:11:46,706 --> 00:11:48,873 -Ugh! Samantha, what the fuck?! 219 00:11:50,843 --> 00:11:52,844 -That's Todd's girlfriend, Samantha. 220 00:11:52,846 --> 00:11:55,914 She's a psych major, which means she's a total psycho. 221 00:11:55,916 --> 00:11:57,782 But, uh, you know, she owns a motor home, 222 00:11:57,784 --> 00:11:59,084 so it's cool. -Oh. 223 00:11:59,086 --> 00:12:01,119 -Babe, you can't keep coming in here, 224 00:12:01,121 --> 00:12:02,821 bringing delicious treats for me. 225 00:12:02,823 --> 00:12:04,956 -But you deserve a treat, Todd! 226 00:12:04,958 --> 00:12:06,357 Just a little bit of pampering 227 00:12:06,359 --> 00:12:09,160 before our big anniversary getaway weekend 228 00:12:09,162 --> 00:12:11,896 in old-town Sacramento. 229 00:12:12,298 --> 00:12:14,833 - I guess I do deserve a treat. 230 00:12:14,835 --> 00:12:16,434 -Mm-hmm. 231 00:12:16,436 --> 00:12:18,036 -But they're over on the floor. 232 00:12:29,482 --> 00:12:31,750 -Sorry I tossed your cookies back there. 233 00:12:31,752 --> 00:12:33,084 -That's okay. I'm used to it. 234 00:12:33,086 --> 00:12:35,353 -What do you mean? 235 00:12:35,355 --> 00:12:37,422 -I've always wanted to be a Delta Bi. 236 00:12:37,424 --> 00:12:40,058 -Be one of these guys? Why? 237 00:12:40,060 --> 00:12:42,894 -Delta Bi is the coolest frat in Chico, 238 00:12:42,896 --> 00:12:44,429 but I'm a girl, 239 00:12:44,431 --> 00:12:47,432 so I could never join, even though I'm a legacy. 240 00:12:47,434 --> 00:12:49,300 -Listen... 241 00:12:49,302 --> 00:12:52,771 I know what it's like to not belong. 242 00:12:52,773 --> 00:12:54,172 -Brent! 243 00:12:54,174 --> 00:12:56,074 -I'm coming, guys! 244 00:12:56,076 --> 00:12:57,342 I'm coming! 245 00:12:57,344 --> 00:12:58,843 All right, I came. 246 00:12:58,845 --> 00:13:01,312 -Some pretty sweet tai chi back there. 247 00:13:01,314 --> 00:13:03,047 Knew you'd fit in here. 248 00:13:03,049 --> 00:13:05,183 -But I never knew tai chi. 249 00:13:05,185 --> 00:13:09,120 My dead brother knew tai chi. 250 00:13:09,122 --> 00:13:10,188 -You okay? 251 00:13:10,190 --> 00:13:11,456 -Sure. 252 00:13:11,458 --> 00:13:13,892 Uh, where's Brock's old room? 253 00:13:18,931 --> 00:13:20,231 -Yeah. 254 00:13:35,247 --> 00:13:40,251 -And the winner for best dancer at prom, Brent Chirino! 255 00:13:42,221 --> 00:13:44,122 -Ugh! This is my room! 256 00:13:44,124 --> 00:13:47,525 I called dibs on this room like two minutes after Brock died! 257 00:13:47,527 --> 00:13:49,894 Shit! 258 00:13:49,896 --> 00:13:51,095 You got to get out of here! 259 00:13:51,097 --> 00:13:52,931 I got to haze a pledge right now. 260 00:13:52,933 --> 00:13:54,866 -This is Turbeaux. -I'm Turbeaux. 261 00:13:54,868 --> 00:13:57,168 Shit! Pinch me, pledge. 262 00:13:57,170 --> 00:13:59,304 Oh! Pinch me harder! 263 00:13:59,306 --> 00:14:01,306 Aah! Guess I'm not dreaming. 264 00:14:01,308 --> 00:14:02,540 Brock told me about you -- 265 00:14:02,542 --> 00:14:04,475 little Brenty Brent Brent Chirino. 266 00:14:04,477 --> 00:14:06,845 Hmm! He said you're a bit of a loner. 267 00:14:06,847 --> 00:14:09,848 -Actually, Turbeaux, Brent's thinking about pledging. 268 00:14:09,850 --> 00:14:11,516 -Oh, really?! 269 00:14:11,518 --> 00:14:13,518 You want to get into this frat? 270 00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:15,420 You want to learn our secrets? 271 00:14:15,422 --> 00:14:17,021 You got to get through me. 272 00:14:17,023 --> 00:14:19,090 Sizzler! 273 00:14:19,092 --> 00:14:21,960 Or maybe you don't have what it takes to be a Delta Bi. 274 00:14:21,962 --> 00:14:22,994 -Do or die! 275 00:14:22,996 --> 00:14:24,362 -You think you can handle... 276 00:14:24,364 --> 00:14:25,964 this?! -Aah! 277 00:14:25,966 --> 00:14:28,499 -You think you can handle this?! 278 00:14:28,501 --> 00:14:29,367 -Ohh! 279 00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:30,969 -You think... 280 00:14:30,971 --> 00:14:33,471 you can handle this? 281 00:14:33,473 --> 00:14:34,339 -Aah! 282 00:14:34,341 --> 00:14:35,473 -This? -Aah! 283 00:14:35,475 --> 00:14:36,641 -This? 284 00:14:36,643 --> 00:14:38,443 -Ohh! -This? 285 00:14:38,445 --> 00:14:39,878 -Aah! Aah! Aah! Aahn=! 286 00:14:39,880 --> 00:14:42,614 -You think you can handle this?! 287 00:14:42,616 --> 00:14:44,315 Do you...think... 288 00:14:44,317 --> 00:14:48,219 you...can... handle...this?! 289 00:14:48,221 --> 00:14:49,654 Watch me not give a shit! 290 00:14:49,656 --> 00:14:51,356 Sizzler! -Ohh! 291 00:14:51,358 --> 00:14:53,191 -I don't care about you! 292 00:14:53,193 --> 00:14:55,059 I don't care where you came from! 293 00:14:55,061 --> 00:14:57,161 Your ancestors mean nothing! 294 00:14:57,163 --> 00:15:00,899 You bring shame to all of us! 295 00:15:00,901 --> 00:15:02,166 -Yes, sir. 296 00:15:02,168 --> 00:15:04,335 -Actually, Brent was thinking about 297 00:15:04,337 --> 00:15:06,337 helping us out with our senior prank. 298 00:15:08,574 --> 00:15:10,909 -Oh, really? 299 00:15:10,911 --> 00:15:14,445 Well, our pranks are pretty goddamn wild. 300 00:15:14,447 --> 00:15:16,481 This year's gonna be no different. 301 00:15:16,483 --> 00:15:18,316 Gonna be bonkers! 302 00:15:18,318 --> 00:15:21,085 We're gonna need a real party boy to pull off this prank. 303 00:15:21,087 --> 00:15:23,454 Is that you? 304 00:15:23,456 --> 00:15:24,923 You daddy's party boy? 305 00:15:24,925 --> 00:15:26,424 -Yes. 306 00:15:26,426 --> 00:15:29,060 -Look at you. You'll never be a Delta Bi. 307 00:15:29,062 --> 00:15:31,462 I'm gonna whup your ass with my big paddle now. 308 00:15:31,464 --> 00:15:32,697 It's in my closet. 309 00:15:36,435 --> 00:15:38,169 Aaaaaah! 310 00:15:38,704 --> 00:15:41,205 - Oh, man! 311 00:15:41,207 --> 00:15:42,573 -God! -I think I captured 312 00:15:42,575 --> 00:15:43,675 some genuine fear there. 313 00:15:43,677 --> 00:15:45,109 -God, guys! 314 00:15:45,111 --> 00:15:47,211 You know how I feel about baby dogs! 315 00:15:47,213 --> 00:15:48,680 -Oh! We got you so good! 316 00:15:48,682 --> 00:15:52,383 -Get the fuck out of here, Samantha! 317 00:15:52,385 --> 00:15:53,251 -Why?! 318 00:15:53,253 --> 00:15:55,353 God, guys! Guys! 319 00:15:55,355 --> 00:15:57,956 -I got this for Brock for his 16th birthday. 320 00:15:57,958 --> 00:16:01,492 It looks just like our childhood dog, Dr. Bagels. 321 00:16:01,494 --> 00:16:03,594 -To me -- to Turbeaux! -Ha! 322 00:16:03,596 --> 00:16:04,996 -To your bro! 323 00:16:04,998 --> 00:16:07,298 -But I need Turbeaux to trust me. 324 00:16:07,300 --> 00:16:10,001 -I hate puppies, too! 325 00:16:10,003 --> 00:16:12,170 Unh! 326 00:16:12,172 --> 00:16:14,572 -Really? 327 00:16:14,574 --> 00:16:17,976 Maybe you are okay, Not Brock. 328 00:16:17,978 --> 00:16:20,311 Maybe you are okay. 329 00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:24,382 Hey, Sizzler, get the window. Z.Q., shut that camera off. 330 00:16:24,384 --> 00:16:25,650 Brent, think about spending the night 331 00:16:25,652 --> 00:16:27,085 in my room once I'm all moved in. 332 00:16:27,087 --> 00:16:28,419 Let's check out these prank plans. 333 00:16:30,290 --> 00:16:33,691 -Oh. First, we're gonna need these. 334 00:16:33,693 --> 00:16:35,994 -That's tape. 335 00:16:35,996 --> 00:16:38,329 -Whoo! 336 00:16:38,331 --> 00:16:40,698 Goddamn! 337 00:16:40,700 --> 00:16:43,501 -They gave us so much of that beer stuff. 338 00:16:43,503 --> 00:16:45,236 I have the spins. 339 00:16:45,238 --> 00:16:46,671 I can't even read this sign. 340 00:16:46,673 --> 00:16:48,106 -Calm down, Nedry! 341 00:16:48,108 --> 00:16:49,741 According to these plank prints, 342 00:16:49,743 --> 00:16:53,511 it says the college radio station is right up there. 343 00:16:53,513 --> 00:16:56,414 So, remember, when we get on the air, 344 00:16:56,416 --> 00:16:57,715 you're gonna say, 345 00:16:57,717 --> 00:17:01,786 "Dean Pepperstone eats farts," okay? 346 00:17:01,788 --> 00:17:03,554 And be sure not to mess it up, 347 00:17:03,556 --> 00:17:05,690 'cause I have to get into this frat 348 00:17:05,692 --> 00:17:10,128 to find out who was the murderer to my brother. 349 00:17:10,130 --> 00:17:12,196 -Whatever you say, best friend! 350 00:17:12,198 --> 00:17:14,599 - They murdered my brother! 351 00:17:15,434 --> 00:17:17,769 -Chico Tower, this is Pan Am flight 912, 352 00:17:17,771 --> 00:17:19,604 requesting permission to land. 353 00:17:19,606 --> 00:17:23,574 -Okay! Dean Pepperstone eats farts! 354 00:17:23,576 --> 00:17:25,176 -Dean Pepperst-- 355 00:17:25,178 --> 00:17:26,677 Listen, this is air-traffic control tower. 356 00:17:26,679 --> 00:17:28,046 Get off this frequency! 357 00:17:28,048 --> 00:17:29,647 -You get off this frequency. 358 00:17:29,649 --> 00:17:31,315 -I am a pilot. I have a plane to land! 359 00:17:31,317 --> 00:17:33,618 I'm gonna crash! -Dean Pepperstone eats farts! 360 00:17:33,620 --> 00:17:36,087 -Oh, God, I'm so sorry! 361 00:17:41,593 --> 00:17:46,664 -You Delta Bi Thetas have done it for the last time! 362 00:17:46,666 --> 00:17:49,133 You killed 250 people, 363 00:17:49,135 --> 00:17:51,335 and I do not eat farts. 364 00:17:51,337 --> 00:17:53,137 -Listen, you need to give us a second chance. 365 00:17:53,139 --> 00:17:54,739 -I've given you enough chances! 366 00:17:54,741 --> 00:17:57,442 Need I remind you of last year's prank, 367 00:17:57,444 --> 00:17:59,143 when you broke the county dam 368 00:17:59,145 --> 00:18:03,214 and submerged Ol' Parchtown in water? 369 00:18:03,216 --> 00:18:05,149 -But we created New Lake City. 370 00:18:05,151 --> 00:18:06,784 -You drowned 4,000 people. 371 00:18:06,786 --> 00:18:09,220 -The paddle-boat business is booming there. 372 00:18:09,222 --> 00:18:12,723 -Don't make me remind you of sophomore-year prank. 373 00:18:14,627 --> 00:18:17,295 -Sophomores, get to the chopper! 374 00:18:17,297 --> 00:18:19,497 We are leaving! 375 00:18:19,499 --> 00:18:21,399 Sophomores, get to the chopper! 376 00:18:21,401 --> 00:18:22,700 -That's not fair! 377 00:18:22,702 --> 00:18:24,535 Freshman-year prank, let me remind you, 378 00:18:24,537 --> 00:18:26,237 we helped... 379 00:18:26,239 --> 00:18:28,506 depose a Central American dictator. 380 00:18:28,508 --> 00:18:31,742 - That's true. Your heavy-metal hot-air balloon 381 00:18:31,744 --> 00:18:35,246 did drive General Cortez from the Brazilian embassy, 382 00:18:35,248 --> 00:18:38,116 which is why I'm only suspending you. 383 00:18:38,118 --> 00:18:39,383 -During Greek Week?! 384 00:18:39,385 --> 00:18:41,219 What's wrong with you?! 385 00:18:41,221 --> 00:18:42,887 -Come on! It's like Easter for men! 386 00:18:42,889 --> 00:18:44,856 -You can have your own Greek Week 387 00:18:44,858 --> 00:18:47,425 out at the old sorority house... 388 00:18:47,427 --> 00:18:49,827 by the lake. -What? Ugh! 389 00:18:49,829 --> 00:18:51,729 -They never pick up their dog shit! 390 00:18:51,731 --> 00:18:53,764 -It's haunted! -No! 391 00:18:55,534 --> 00:18:58,302 -Go there, brother. 392 00:19:00,439 --> 00:19:02,573 -Guys, a weekend at the lake? 393 00:19:02,575 --> 00:19:04,475 That's nothing, right? 394 00:19:04,477 --> 00:19:09,147 It'll be like a -- like a Dude Bro party! 395 00:19:09,149 --> 00:19:10,781 -Yeah. Okay. 396 00:19:10,783 --> 00:19:12,183 -Yeah. 397 00:19:12,185 --> 00:19:13,751 A Dude Bro party. 398 00:19:13,753 --> 00:19:15,653 And maybe you could invite some, 399 00:19:15,655 --> 00:19:19,690 uh, young, nubile, recently divorced women? 400 00:19:19,692 --> 00:19:21,526 -No! -No! 401 00:19:21,528 --> 00:19:22,527 -Bullshit! 402 00:19:22,529 --> 00:19:23,828 -Come on! No girls allowed! 403 00:19:23,830 --> 00:19:25,296 -Fine! Fine! Get out! 404 00:19:25,298 --> 00:19:27,465 Get out, all of you! 405 00:19:27,467 --> 00:19:28,833 -Somebody help me! 406 00:19:28,835 --> 00:19:30,735 -Should I lock this? 407 00:19:37,743 --> 00:19:38,643 -It's done. 408 00:19:38,645 --> 00:19:40,311 -Excellent. 409 00:19:40,313 --> 00:19:45,716 Soon, the Dude Bros will taste their own blood. 410 00:19:45,718 --> 00:19:52,356 All that's required now is a virgin sacrifice. 411 00:19:52,358 --> 00:19:54,559 Virgo sacrificium. 412 00:19:54,561 --> 00:19:56,327 -Yes, yes. Virgo Sacramento. 413 00:19:56,329 --> 00:20:00,431 Whatever. -Virgo sacrificium. 414 00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:03,401 Virgo sacrificium. 415 00:20:03,403 --> 00:20:04,535 -No! 416 00:20:04,537 --> 00:20:05,303 No! 417 00:20:05,305 --> 00:20:07,305 Aah! Ohh! 418 00:20:07,307 --> 00:20:08,239 Aah! 419 00:20:08,241 --> 00:20:09,674 Aah! 420 00:20:09,676 --> 00:20:13,744 -Virgo sacrificium! 421 00:20:13,746 --> 00:20:17,582 -I'm an immortal fuck machine! 422 00:20:19,751 --> 00:20:21,352 -Buttiker, get in here! 423 00:20:21,354 --> 00:20:24,722 -Uh-oh! Someone's in trouble! 424 00:20:27,359 --> 00:20:30,494 -Yes, Chief. -Ah. Candace Buttiker. 425 00:20:30,496 --> 00:20:32,563 First in your class at Naval Academy, 426 00:20:32,565 --> 00:20:33,898 in Valencia, Florida. 427 00:20:33,900 --> 00:20:35,833 Are you ready for a real-world 428 00:20:35,835 --> 00:20:37,501 Chico police mission? 429 00:20:37,503 --> 00:20:38,703 -Oh, daddy like! 430 00:20:38,705 --> 00:20:40,271 -What have you got for me, Chief? 431 00:20:40,273 --> 00:20:42,273 -Motherface is rising on the harvest moon 432 00:20:42,275 --> 00:20:44,408 to kill the Delta Bis, 433 00:20:44,410 --> 00:20:47,845 but her plan won't work without a virgin sacrifice. 434 00:20:47,847 --> 00:20:50,748 That's where that idiot virgin Sminkle comes in 435 00:20:50,750 --> 00:20:52,817 -Aah! Fuck! My face! 436 00:20:52,819 --> 00:20:55,953 -You want me to send Officer Sminkle to his death. 437 00:20:55,955 --> 00:21:01,459 -You see, only his death will give Motherface the power 438 00:21:01,461 --> 00:21:05,529 to defeat the Delta Bis when it matters the most. 439 00:21:05,531 --> 00:21:08,633 -And, um, what would you like me to tell him? 440 00:21:08,635 --> 00:21:11,502 - Watch this. 441 00:21:14,307 --> 00:21:16,440 Sminkle, get in here! 442 00:21:16,442 --> 00:21:18,676 -Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy! 443 00:21:18,678 --> 00:21:19,844 Aw, come on, Chief! 444 00:21:19,846 --> 00:21:21,345 I thought we talked about this. 445 00:21:21,347 --> 00:21:24,949 No girls allowed in the Dude Room. 446 00:21:28,420 --> 00:21:29,487 I'm fine. Ah-choo! 447 00:21:29,489 --> 00:21:31,389 -Aah! What the hell?! 448 00:21:31,391 --> 00:21:32,890 -Sminkle, um, 449 00:21:32,892 --> 00:21:35,426 I have kind of an important assignment for you, if -- 450 00:21:35,428 --> 00:21:36,827 if you think you're up for it. 451 00:21:36,829 --> 00:21:39,430 -Oh, my gosh. Oh, absolutely. 452 00:21:39,432 --> 00:21:42,033 Wait a second, though. Don't -- don't you hate me? 453 00:21:42,035 --> 00:21:44,402 'Cause you called me a cum bubble yesterday. 454 00:21:44,404 --> 00:21:46,370 -Well, the way you got that girl to confess 455 00:21:46,372 --> 00:21:49,073 that she was hiding those drugs in her butthole, 456 00:21:49,075 --> 00:21:50,641 that was pretty impressive. 457 00:21:50,643 --> 00:21:52,977 And I'd like to kind of give you a reward. 458 00:21:52,979 --> 00:21:56,447 You know about Chico's orange-shortage problem, right? 459 00:21:56,449 --> 00:21:58,649 -Oh, yes. It's very terrible, Chief. 460 00:21:58,651 --> 00:22:01,552 City-wide vitamin-C levels have never been lower. 461 00:22:01,554 --> 00:22:04,622 -Well, uh, turns out your old friends 462 00:22:04,624 --> 00:22:09,727 the Dude Bros are, in reality... 463 00:22:09,729 --> 00:22:12,363 bags of oranges. 464 00:22:16,001 --> 00:22:17,868 -I should've known. 465 00:22:17,870 --> 00:22:21,872 -So, what I need you to do is find them, 466 00:22:21,874 --> 00:22:23,541 bop them on the nose, 467 00:22:23,543 --> 00:22:26,043 and turn them back into their actual forms, 468 00:22:26,045 --> 00:22:27,678 which as I said earlier, 469 00:22:27,680 --> 00:22:31,382 are bags of oranges. 470 00:22:31,384 --> 00:22:32,983 Save our city, Sminkle. 471 00:22:32,985 --> 00:22:35,653 Officer Buttiker will accompany you 472 00:22:35,655 --> 00:22:40,891 to bop the Dude Bros on the nose 473 00:22:40,893 --> 00:22:49,533 and turn them back into bags of fucking oranges. 474 00:22:49,535 --> 00:22:52,436 -Got it! You won't regret this, Chief-a-rooney! 475 00:22:52,438 --> 00:22:55,606 -See? Now Officer Sminkle's Spazwagon 476 00:22:55,608 --> 00:22:57,408 is all gassed up. 477 00:22:57,410 --> 00:23:00,511 The Dude Bros are at the old sorority house by the lake. 478 00:23:00,513 --> 00:23:02,847 And get there before the harvest moon. 479 00:23:02,849 --> 00:23:04,749 The town is depending on you. 480 00:23:14,559 --> 00:23:15,593 -Come on, guys! 481 00:23:15,595 --> 00:23:19,730 Let's get some tunes in here! 482 00:23:21,534 --> 00:23:23,000 -What the shit is this?! 483 00:23:23,002 --> 00:23:24,135 -Yeah, Todd. 484 00:23:24,137 --> 00:23:27,071 What is all this about? 485 00:23:27,073 --> 00:23:30,641 -Flowers, the music, champagne, 486 00:23:30,643 --> 00:23:32,710 that banner I refuse to read... 487 00:23:32,712 --> 00:23:35,813 -Guys, Samantha loves you, 488 00:23:35,815 --> 00:23:39,650 and she wants us to have a good time by the lake. 489 00:23:47,959 --> 00:23:49,960 -Aah! 490 00:23:49,962 --> 00:23:52,196 -Hey, Todd, Samantha take your virginity yet? 491 00:23:52,198 --> 00:23:53,697 -Not yet. 492 00:23:53,699 --> 00:23:56,200 She's been really pushing me, though. 493 00:23:56,202 --> 00:23:58,102 And I'm not ready to be a dad. 494 00:23:58,104 --> 00:24:00,604 -Guys, there's baby stuff in here! Gah! 495 00:24:00,606 --> 00:24:02,573 -Hey! No! No baby stuff! 496 00:24:02,575 --> 00:24:04,108 -Baby hats... -Put that stuff back! 497 00:24:04,110 --> 00:24:07,011 No babies! -No, Todd, we're Americans! 498 00:24:07,013 --> 00:24:10,748 We can do whatever we want with no consequences! 499 00:24:10,750 --> 00:24:12,983 -No consequences in America! 500 00:24:12,985 --> 00:24:15,052 -A toast to Brent. 501 00:24:15,054 --> 00:24:16,854 -Boo! 502 00:24:16,856 --> 00:24:19,957 -Hey, now, pour that pledge a pint of Prosecco, partner. 503 00:24:19,959 --> 00:24:22,993 Chirino perfectly pulled off our senior prank. 504 00:24:22,995 --> 00:24:25,830 We wanted the whole world to know that Dean Pepperstone 505 00:24:25,832 --> 00:24:27,064 eats farts. -Thank you. 506 00:24:27,066 --> 00:24:28,933 -And I think they got the message. 507 00:24:28,935 --> 00:24:30,968 -Speech! Speech! Right now! 508 00:24:30,970 --> 00:24:32,803 -Um... 509 00:24:32,805 --> 00:24:35,172 I guess I just want to say, uh, 510 00:24:35,174 --> 00:24:42,480 I can see why my brother was so stoked on you guys. 511 00:24:42,482 --> 00:24:44,582 Um... 512 00:24:44,584 --> 00:24:47,251 and, uh... 513 00:24:50,957 --> 00:24:52,022 Titties. 514 00:24:52,024 --> 00:24:53,224 -Yeah! 515 00:24:53,226 --> 00:24:54,492 Yeah! -All right. 516 00:24:54,494 --> 00:24:55,259 -Yeah! -Whoo! 517 00:24:55,261 --> 00:24:57,194 -Yeah! 518 00:24:57,196 --> 00:24:59,797 -Yes! Oh, my favorite! 519 00:24:59,799 --> 00:25:03,701 -Yeah! -Forever's gonna start tonight! 520 00:25:03,703 --> 00:25:06,537 -Delta Bi! Do or die! -It speaks! 521 00:25:06,539 --> 00:25:08,973 -Delta Bi! Do or die! 522 00:25:08,975 --> 00:25:11,542 Delta Bi! Do or die! 523 00:25:11,544 --> 00:25:13,177 Delta Bi! Do or die! 524 00:25:13,179 --> 00:25:15,613 Delta Bi! Do or die! 525 00:25:15,615 --> 00:25:20,050 -Delta Bi! Do or die! Delta Bi! Do or die! 526 00:25:20,052 --> 00:25:23,254 -How are we gonna get across this lake? 527 00:25:32,597 --> 00:25:35,199 -Well, that's enough footage of that. 528 00:25:35,201 --> 00:25:37,801 Someone want to get his attention? 529 00:25:37,803 --> 00:25:38,802 -Come on, pledge. 530 00:25:38,804 --> 00:25:39,937 I'm over this tear shit. 531 00:25:39,939 --> 00:25:41,071 Go get us some paddy boats. 532 00:25:41,073 --> 00:25:42,172 Come on! 533 00:25:46,711 --> 00:25:48,679 -Uh...Uh, hello? 534 00:25:48,681 --> 00:25:49,947 -Go away! 535 00:25:49,949 --> 00:25:52,082 Can't you see I'm mourning the dea-- 536 00:26:05,864 --> 00:26:08,299 Oh. 537 00:26:08,301 --> 00:26:12,303 Hey! The Delta Bis! 538 00:26:12,305 --> 00:26:14,572 I was just celebrating the anniversary 539 00:26:14,574 --> 00:26:18,008 of my business finally taking off, huh? 540 00:26:18,010 --> 00:26:21,111 I have you boys to thank for that. 541 00:26:23,249 --> 00:26:26,216 Stand over there, next to my dead family! 542 00:26:26,218 --> 00:26:27,952 Come on. Yep. 543 00:26:27,954 --> 00:26:31,055 Nobody wanted to rent a paddy boat in Ol' Parchtown. 544 00:26:31,057 --> 00:26:33,290 I was swimming in debt. 545 00:26:33,292 --> 00:26:35,225 Until you boys flooded the town 546 00:26:35,227 --> 00:26:37,361 and drowned my whole family, that is. 547 00:26:37,363 --> 00:26:40,331 Now business is booming! 548 00:26:40,333 --> 00:26:43,267 Go ahead -- put your arm around my wife. 549 00:26:43,269 --> 00:26:46,036 My beautiful wife! 550 00:26:46,038 --> 00:26:49,273 She died doing what she loved. 551 00:26:49,275 --> 00:26:51,609 -Drowning? -Yeah. 552 00:26:51,611 --> 00:26:53,143 Not much reason for swimming lessons 553 00:26:53,145 --> 00:26:54,912 if you lived in Ol' Parchtown, 554 00:26:54,914 --> 00:26:59,016 which is what made it such a particularly funny prank. 555 00:27:02,722 --> 00:27:06,056 -Now let's do a goofy one! 556 00:27:06,058 --> 00:27:08,726 I said make it goofy! 557 00:27:20,705 --> 00:27:22,406 That's a great picture. 558 00:27:22,408 --> 00:27:25,809 Oh, man, that's my baby boy, too. 559 00:27:25,811 --> 00:27:29,980 16 months old when the water took him away. 560 00:27:29,982 --> 00:27:32,316 You guys still got it! 561 00:27:32,318 --> 00:27:34,652 Pranksters till the end! 562 00:27:34,654 --> 00:27:37,021 The bitter...end. 563 00:27:38,323 --> 00:27:40,224 You boys want to rent a paddy boat? 564 00:27:43,429 --> 00:27:45,829 What paddy boat are you gonna choose, Brock? 565 00:27:45,831 --> 00:27:48,799 -I'm Brent. -Okay. All right. 566 00:27:48,801 --> 00:27:51,201 -I trust that you have a paddy boat that will accommodate 567 00:27:51,203 --> 00:27:52,269 my lifestyle. -No. 568 00:27:52,271 --> 00:27:53,404 -Oh. 569 00:27:53,406 --> 00:27:56,073 -If I remember correctly, and I do, 570 00:27:56,075 --> 00:27:58,308 there's a handicap paddle boat about 20 miles that way. 571 00:27:58,310 --> 00:28:01,011 -Yeah! Fuck off, Nerdry! 572 00:28:01,013 --> 00:28:02,413 -Don't tell me to F off! 573 00:28:02,415 --> 00:28:04,214 I'll F you if you don't come back for me! 574 00:28:04,216 --> 00:28:06,950 -Whoa, whoa! Nerdry, come on. 575 00:28:06,952 --> 00:28:08,018 You're in college now. 576 00:28:08,020 --> 00:28:09,420 You can say "fuck." 577 00:28:09,422 --> 00:28:11,388 Give it a try. 578 00:28:11,390 --> 00:28:14,758 -F-f-f-f-f-f... 579 00:28:14,760 --> 00:28:16,694 F-f-f-f-f-f-fu-- 580 00:28:18,097 --> 00:28:19,763 You won't leave me here, will you? 581 00:28:19,765 --> 00:28:22,199 -I got to go with them. You understand. 582 00:28:22,201 --> 00:28:23,801 Here. 583 00:28:23,803 --> 00:28:26,103 In case your wheelchair breaks down. 584 00:28:26,105 --> 00:28:27,237 -Uh, thanks. 585 00:28:27,239 --> 00:28:28,972 Radical deck. 586 00:28:28,974 --> 00:28:31,809 Well, see you there, Brent. 587 00:28:31,811 --> 00:28:33,877 Don't forget to avenge your murdered brother! 588 00:28:33,879 --> 00:28:36,280 -Okay! One more picture! 589 00:28:36,282 --> 00:28:37,481 And surprise me! 590 00:28:37,483 --> 00:28:39,016 Like when you blew up the dam 591 00:28:39,018 --> 00:28:41,885 and took everyone I knew and loved! 592 00:28:49,394 --> 00:28:52,062 -Well, they don't call me Ol' Iron Arms Headcheese 593 00:28:52,064 --> 00:28:53,097 for nothing. 594 00:28:53,099 --> 00:28:54,732 Just 20 more miles, 595 00:28:54,734 --> 00:28:56,400 and I'll have an ice-cold brew waiting for me. 596 00:28:56,402 --> 00:28:59,770 Ha! 597 00:28:59,772 --> 00:29:02,272 Oh, monkey butts. 598 00:29:02,274 --> 00:29:05,342 Is it so pooping hard to load a legacy 599 00:29:05,344 --> 00:29:08,278 into a -- a whore paddle boat?! 600 00:29:08,280 --> 00:29:09,346 That's it. 601 00:29:09,348 --> 00:29:11,248 I'm gonna say it. 602 00:29:11,250 --> 00:29:13,383 F-f-f-fuck this creek! 603 00:29:14,786 --> 00:29:17,087 Those dick farts never gave two shitting bitches 604 00:29:17,089 --> 00:29:18,455 about Ol' Iron Arms. 605 00:29:18,457 --> 00:29:20,157 They'll see. 606 00:29:20,159 --> 00:29:23,026 I'll show those vagina faces what's what. 607 00:29:23,028 --> 00:29:27,264 Those Delta Bi titty jizzers will regret the day they were -- 608 00:29:27,266 --> 00:29:28,866 Guys? 609 00:29:31,369 --> 00:29:33,203 Help. 610 00:30:03,968 --> 00:30:06,036 -My psychic told me my son's head would cave in 611 00:30:06,038 --> 00:30:07,137 from a car accident, 612 00:30:07,139 --> 00:30:09,006 and hello, prom night. 613 00:30:14,078 --> 00:30:15,579 -And the number-one reason 614 00:30:15,581 --> 00:30:19,583 men and women just can't get along... 615 00:30:19,585 --> 00:30:21,819 The remote control! 616 00:30:21,821 --> 00:30:23,086 What do you think, Candace? 617 00:30:23,088 --> 00:30:24,822 Think Letterman will go for these lists? 618 00:30:24,824 --> 00:30:26,490 -I'm not here to humor you, Sminkle. 619 00:30:26,492 --> 00:30:29,960 -Top 10 reasons Letterman will go for these Top 10 lists. 620 00:30:29,962 --> 00:30:33,263 Number 10, my boundless enthusiasm. 621 00:30:33,265 --> 00:30:35,165 -32 more hours, Candace. 622 00:30:35,167 --> 00:30:38,035 -Number 9, that man is slapping a little boy. 623 00:30:38,037 --> 00:30:39,303 -What? -That man is 624 00:30:39,305 --> 00:30:41,038 slapping a little boy! -Oh, my God! 625 00:30:41,040 --> 00:30:42,439 -You think you're cooler than me 626 00:30:42,441 --> 00:30:45,876 just 'cause you got a fancy tie and a job?! 627 00:30:45,878 --> 00:30:48,545 -Yaaah! 628 00:30:48,547 --> 00:30:50,547 Here's $100 and "The Grapes of Wrath," kid! 629 00:30:50,549 --> 00:30:52,249 Get out of town! Change your name! 630 00:30:52,251 --> 00:30:53,851 Start a new life for yourself! 631 00:30:53,853 --> 00:30:56,053 Keep going! Keep going! You can do it! 632 00:30:56,055 --> 00:30:58,856 And once you get into the trees for the night, 633 00:30:58,858 --> 00:31:01,225 I want you to read that fucking book! 634 00:31:02,894 --> 00:31:05,629 -That was, uh, pretty impressive how you handled that. 635 00:31:05,631 --> 00:31:08,632 -Yeah, well, every child deserves a chance. 636 00:31:10,034 --> 00:31:12,035 -Aaaaaaah! 637 00:31:12,037 --> 00:31:13,503 -I love children. 638 00:31:13,505 --> 00:31:15,472 They're the future that we screwed up for ourselves, 639 00:31:15,474 --> 00:31:18,408 you know? So innocent. 640 00:31:18,410 --> 00:31:21,345 I guess you probably don't care about this crazy dream 641 00:31:21,347 --> 00:31:23,213 that I have, but, uh... 642 00:31:24,983 --> 00:31:28,285 I want to open up a mobile library for children. 643 00:31:28,287 --> 00:31:30,287 -Really? -You see, the first time 644 00:31:30,289 --> 00:31:33,090 I read a book, my mind went bang! 645 00:31:33,092 --> 00:31:35,559 Like, anything in the universe was possible, 646 00:31:35,561 --> 00:31:38,161 and I could find it all in the pages of a book. 647 00:31:38,163 --> 00:31:40,430 And, well, that's what I want to do 648 00:31:40,432 --> 00:31:42,566 for all the children of Chico. 649 00:31:42,568 --> 00:31:45,002 I just want to bang them all. 650 00:31:47,906 --> 00:31:49,172 -Um... -I'm gonna call it 651 00:31:49,174 --> 00:31:51,308 Sminkle's Bang Bus, Candace. 652 00:31:51,310 --> 00:31:54,912 No more waiting in the public library to bang every kid I see. 653 00:31:54,914 --> 00:31:57,381 No, sir, I'm going to travel from block to block, 654 00:31:57,383 --> 00:31:59,249 screaming out my window for kids 655 00:31:59,251 --> 00:32:02,653 to climb aboard my bus and get banged silly. 656 00:32:02,655 --> 00:32:04,688 -I mean, your heart's in the right place, 657 00:32:04,690 --> 00:32:08,258 but, um, how about "bookmobile"? 658 00:32:08,260 --> 00:32:10,127 -Yeah? -Not gonna lie, Candace -- 659 00:32:10,129 --> 00:32:13,063 that sounds real boring. 660 00:32:13,065 --> 00:32:16,166 I would not want to get banged in a bookmobile. 661 00:32:18,002 --> 00:32:19,169 My bang bus. -Oh, no! 662 00:32:19,171 --> 00:32:20,971 Oh, no, no, no! -My bang bus! 663 00:32:20,973 --> 00:32:22,139 My dream! 664 00:32:25,476 --> 00:32:26,610 -Sminkle! 665 00:32:26,612 --> 00:32:28,178 -Aw, man! 666 00:32:28,180 --> 00:32:31,381 Why does it have to not be a person anymore? 667 00:32:31,383 --> 00:32:32,382 -Ugh. 668 00:32:43,494 --> 00:32:44,728 -There it is. 669 00:32:44,730 --> 00:32:47,030 The old sorority house by the lake. 670 00:33:04,048 --> 00:33:07,084 -Damn it! This place is a fucking shit-hole! 671 00:33:07,086 --> 00:33:08,518 Who did this?! 672 00:33:08,520 --> 00:33:10,287 -Aah! 673 00:33:12,358 --> 00:33:16,693 -Someone -- someone else somewhere is in here. 674 00:33:28,006 --> 00:33:32,209 -Relax, bros! It's me! -Rip Stick! 675 00:33:32,211 --> 00:33:34,678 -Thought you'd rock out on the lake without me, yeah? 676 00:33:34,680 --> 00:33:37,147 -We thought you died in the embassy. 677 00:33:41,452 --> 00:33:45,555 -Part of me did die that day. 678 00:33:45,557 --> 00:33:47,024 But now I'm back! 679 00:33:47,026 --> 00:33:48,692 Rippin' and stickin'! 680 00:33:53,431 --> 00:33:56,500 And I see I'm not the only one back from the dead, Brock. 681 00:33:56,502 --> 00:33:58,035 -Brock did die. 682 00:33:58,037 --> 00:34:01,304 That's his twin brother, Brent. 683 00:34:01,306 --> 00:34:02,672 -Weird. 684 00:34:02,674 --> 00:34:04,775 Well, let's clean this stupid shit-hole 685 00:34:04,777 --> 00:34:06,309 up so we can party, eh?! 686 00:34:06,311 --> 00:34:07,544 -Yeah! 687 00:34:07,546 --> 00:34:09,479 -All right! 688 00:35:19,618 --> 00:35:22,119 - Hey! 689 00:35:31,329 --> 00:35:33,196 -This is more like it, huh, guys? 690 00:35:34,532 --> 00:35:36,700 -Okay. Now start partying. 691 00:35:41,340 --> 00:35:42,706 -Yeah! 692 00:35:50,748 --> 00:35:53,416 -Oh! No, no! It's happening again! 693 00:35:53,418 --> 00:35:54,618 Again! It's happening again! 694 00:35:54,620 --> 00:35:56,319 -What is your problem, Samzy?! 695 00:35:56,321 --> 00:35:58,155 -Yeah, chill out, Samzy! 696 00:35:58,157 --> 00:35:59,556 -Self-righteous fuck! 697 00:35:59,558 --> 00:36:01,658 -Samzy, you need to chill out, all right? 698 00:36:01,660 --> 00:36:04,828 This is just an old house with old fuses, bro. 699 00:36:04,830 --> 00:36:05,896 -Old fuses. 700 00:36:05,898 --> 00:36:07,697 -That's what I said -- fuses. 701 00:36:07,699 --> 00:36:09,232 -Old fuses, huh? 702 00:36:09,234 --> 00:36:11,801 -They are fuses, motherfucker! -It's old! 703 00:36:11,803 --> 00:36:13,670 -The fuse box is in the shed, 704 00:36:13,672 --> 00:36:15,338 if I remember correctly. 705 00:36:15,340 --> 00:36:17,541 -Derek, you know how to be a handyman from your dad. 706 00:36:17,543 --> 00:36:19,176 Go out there. -I told you, 707 00:36:19,178 --> 00:36:20,744 I hate handyman work. 708 00:36:20,746 --> 00:36:23,613 -You never told me that, bro. You never told me that. 709 00:36:23,615 --> 00:36:26,249 I would have not said that if you had told me that earlier. 710 00:36:38,429 --> 00:36:39,763 I'm so sorry. 711 00:36:40,565 --> 00:36:42,432 -Here goes nothing. 712 00:36:51,375 --> 00:36:53,643 All right, Derek, you can do this. 713 00:36:53,645 --> 00:36:55,845 You've been working with a therapist on this. 714 00:36:55,847 --> 00:36:57,547 You can do it. 715 00:36:57,549 --> 00:36:59,883 They're just tools. 716 00:36:59,885 --> 00:37:02,352 They're all just a bunch of tools. 717 00:37:05,590 --> 00:37:07,824 Oh, no! 718 00:37:22,274 --> 00:37:25,542 All just a bunch of tools. 719 00:37:39,790 --> 00:37:41,891 Aha. Gotcha. 720 00:37:43,661 --> 00:37:45,662 Aaaah! 721 00:37:45,664 --> 00:37:47,797 -Hoes before bros! 722 00:37:50,501 --> 00:37:51,935 - Derek did it! 723 00:37:51,937 --> 00:37:53,603 The electricity! 724 00:38:03,547 --> 00:38:05,015 -Come dance with us. 725 00:38:05,017 --> 00:38:07,751 -Brent, go dance with them. Go. 726 00:38:07,753 --> 00:38:09,619 Go, go, go. 727 00:38:09,621 --> 00:38:13,556 -D-a-ance? 728 00:38:13,558 --> 00:38:14,958 With someone? 729 00:38:15,860 --> 00:38:17,994 I did that once. 730 00:38:24,735 --> 00:38:26,970 -There you are, Brent. 731 00:38:26,972 --> 00:38:28,438 What are you doing? 732 00:38:28,440 --> 00:38:31,441 Prom limo's waiting outside. -Whoo! 733 00:38:31,443 --> 00:38:32,842 -I'm scared, Brock. 734 00:38:32,844 --> 00:38:34,778 I've never been with a girl before... 735 00:38:34,780 --> 00:38:37,414 dancing-wise. 736 00:38:37,416 --> 00:38:38,882 You... 737 00:38:38,884 --> 00:38:40,717 You weren't supposed to see this. 738 00:38:40,719 --> 00:38:43,453 -Dancing is easy, Brent -- 739 00:38:43,455 --> 00:38:44,988 if you have a plan, that is. 740 00:38:44,990 --> 00:38:46,723 Here. 741 00:38:46,725 --> 00:38:48,558 Let me show you. 742 00:38:51,696 --> 00:38:54,731 Follow the natural rhythm of the music. 743 00:38:54,733 --> 00:38:57,467 Ease into her smooth curves. 744 00:38:57,469 --> 00:38:59,636 The body wants what it wants. 745 00:38:59,638 --> 00:39:00,870 -I think I'm getting it! 746 00:39:00,872 --> 00:39:03,540 -Dancing is like tai-chi fighting. 747 00:39:03,542 --> 00:39:06,976 It's all about the transference of energy. 748 00:39:06,978 --> 00:39:09,546 Just use her inertia against her. 749 00:39:09,548 --> 00:39:10,613 That's it now. 750 00:39:10,615 --> 00:39:12,949 Whoooa! 751 00:39:12,951 --> 00:39:15,752 -Oh. 752 00:39:15,754 --> 00:39:17,620 -Oh, and first thing tomorrow, 753 00:39:17,622 --> 00:39:20,523 we're gonna return that mannequin to T.J. Maxx, buddy. 754 00:39:20,525 --> 00:39:21,691 -All right. 755 00:39:22,793 --> 00:39:24,994 Oh, Brock, what am I gonna do 756 00:39:24,996 --> 00:39:26,863 when you go off to East Chico U.? 757 00:39:26,865 --> 00:39:29,099 -Hey, you'll make some friends of your own. 758 00:39:29,101 --> 00:39:31,368 -But everybody sucks but us. 759 00:39:31,370 --> 00:39:32,969 -Remember what I always say -- 760 00:39:32,971 --> 00:39:34,404 when you face a foe 761 00:39:34,406 --> 00:39:36,072 you're afraid you can't defeat -- 762 00:39:36,074 --> 00:39:37,507 Murder! 763 00:39:37,509 --> 00:39:41,711 Aahhhhhhhhhhh! 764 00:39:41,713 --> 00:39:44,114 -Aah! Aah! Aah! 765 00:39:44,116 --> 00:39:45,582 Aah! 766 00:39:45,584 --> 00:39:47,884 Aah! 767 00:39:47,886 --> 00:39:50,053 It's horrible! 768 00:39:50,055 --> 00:39:51,521 Someone killed! 769 00:39:51,523 --> 00:39:52,689 -What's going on, Spike? 770 00:39:52,691 --> 00:39:53,790 -Spike, tell us what happened! 771 00:39:53,792 --> 00:39:55,925 -Someone killed... 772 00:39:55,927 --> 00:39:58,161 all the beer! 773 00:40:00,399 --> 00:40:02,098 -This can... 774 00:40:02,100 --> 00:40:03,500 Shotgunned. 775 00:40:03,502 --> 00:40:05,101 -Why?! 776 00:40:05,103 --> 00:40:07,837 Who would do such a thing?! 777 00:40:07,839 --> 00:40:09,672 -Did you know about his worst fear? 778 00:40:09,674 --> 00:40:10,707 -Running out of beer? 779 00:40:10,709 --> 00:40:11,775 -I think it's pretty clear. 780 00:40:13,478 --> 00:40:14,744 -We'll get to the bottom of this. 781 00:40:14,746 --> 00:40:17,814 But right now, beer run, pledge, now! 782 00:40:17,816 --> 00:40:18,715 -I'll take the pledge. 783 00:40:18,717 --> 00:40:19,716 I was planning on getting 784 00:40:19,718 --> 00:40:21,117 some candid nature shots anyway. 785 00:40:21,119 --> 00:40:22,685 -Yeah, yeah, sounds real great. 786 00:40:22,687 --> 00:40:24,921 Just one thing, pledge! 787 00:40:26,590 --> 00:40:29,692 Welcome to the beef box, population you. 788 00:40:29,694 --> 00:40:32,429 This is where you live now, in this thing. 789 00:40:32,431 --> 00:40:34,697 Lick the inside for a 3-D experience, 790 00:40:34,699 --> 00:40:37,801 you little shit bag. 791 00:40:37,803 --> 00:40:39,936 -All these bills! 792 00:40:39,938 --> 00:40:41,571 Aaaaah! 793 00:40:41,573 --> 00:40:42,572 -Your vagina -- 794 00:40:45,976 --> 00:40:48,912 -Uh, you sure you don't want me to call my dad, 795 00:40:48,914 --> 00:40:50,713 just have him come pick us up? -No! 796 00:40:50,715 --> 00:40:52,816 I've got to fix this on my own! 797 00:40:52,818 --> 00:40:55,585 Plus, you murdered a guy! -Hey! 798 00:40:55,587 --> 00:40:57,053 Stuff happens, Candace. 799 00:40:57,055 --> 00:40:59,055 That's the real world we live in. 800 00:41:00,992 --> 00:41:02,992 Well, the wolves are coming. 801 00:41:02,994 --> 00:41:04,727 Let's spend the night here. 802 00:41:04,729 --> 00:41:06,896 Clean up the dead parts in the morning. 803 00:41:16,808 --> 00:41:19,476 - What's wrong? 804 00:41:19,478 --> 00:41:20,743 -I'm sorry. 805 00:41:20,745 --> 00:41:24,514 I've just had a hard time sleeping since... 806 00:41:24,516 --> 00:41:25,949 -Since what? 807 00:41:25,951 --> 00:41:29,185 -The Dude Bro sophomore-year prank. 808 00:41:29,187 --> 00:41:30,987 -Oh, yeah. 809 00:41:30,989 --> 00:41:32,188 The sophomore-year prank. 810 00:41:32,190 --> 00:41:34,891 I remember it well. 811 00:41:34,893 --> 00:41:36,593 -Time's up, Sminkle. 812 00:41:36,595 --> 00:41:39,062 But you know what you can get for another $200, right? 813 00:41:39,064 --> 00:41:41,664 -Who the fuck do you think you're talking to, Fantasia?! 814 00:41:41,666 --> 00:41:43,199 I own this fucking town! 815 00:41:44,769 --> 00:41:46,102 I am eternal! 816 00:41:46,104 --> 00:41:48,137 I am eternal! 817 00:41:48,139 --> 00:41:50,974 Well, I don't really remember the sophomore-year prank, 818 00:41:50,976 --> 00:41:54,277 but I'm sure it was something awful. 819 00:41:54,279 --> 00:41:56,913 We're gonna get those Dude Bros, Candace. 820 00:41:56,915 --> 00:41:59,182 I don't know if you've ever... 821 00:41:59,184 --> 00:42:02,118 bopped anybody on the nose before, but, uh... 822 00:42:02,120 --> 00:42:05,588 it sure brings about a lot of closure. 823 00:42:05,590 --> 00:42:08,157 -Yeah. -Oh, um, I kind of sleep 824 00:42:08,159 --> 00:42:10,260 with my eyes open. 825 00:42:10,262 --> 00:42:11,728 It's just a thing. 826 00:42:11,730 --> 00:42:12,929 -It's okay. 827 00:42:12,931 --> 00:42:15,198 -Hang in there, partner. 828 00:42:15,200 --> 00:42:17,100 Good night. 829 00:42:17,102 --> 00:42:19,035 -Good night. 830 00:42:23,240 --> 00:42:25,141 Sminkle? 831 00:42:43,193 --> 00:42:45,628 -Z.Q., I can't see a thing in this thing. 832 00:42:45,630 --> 00:42:48,031 -Life is tough in the beef box, pledge. 833 00:42:48,033 --> 00:42:49,666 You know, you can get out of that box 834 00:42:49,668 --> 00:42:51,634 if you just man up and beef. 835 00:42:51,636 --> 00:42:53,102 I beefed on day five. 836 00:42:53,104 --> 00:42:55,805 Spike, he beefed like every hour. 837 00:42:55,807 --> 00:42:57,674 It's like, "Spike, slow your roll, man. 838 00:42:57,676 --> 00:43:00,577 Don't beef so fast." He wouldn't listen. 839 00:43:00,579 --> 00:43:03,580 Turbeaux, he beefed before he even got in there. 840 00:43:03,582 --> 00:43:04,747 Dude's a machine. 841 00:43:04,749 --> 00:43:06,149 -Those guys seem pretty wild. 842 00:43:06,151 --> 00:43:08,685 -So fucking wild. 843 00:43:08,687 --> 00:43:10,620 -Can I tell you something, Z.Q., 844 00:43:10,622 --> 00:43:12,121 something I haven't told anyone? 845 00:43:12,123 --> 00:43:13,957 -Sure, Sizzler. 846 00:43:13,959 --> 00:43:16,993 -Sometimes, I think those guys don't respect me. 847 00:43:16,995 --> 00:43:19,596 And I'll never be a Delta Bi 848 00:43:19,598 --> 00:43:22,031 even if I get out of this cold beef box. 849 00:43:22,033 --> 00:43:24,200 -Delta Bis have to have confidence. 850 00:43:24,202 --> 00:43:25,969 In there, you have to think on your feet, 851 00:43:25,971 --> 00:43:27,971 'cause it's all you've got. 852 00:43:27,973 --> 00:43:31,307 My advice, if you're getting cold, just beef. 853 00:43:31,309 --> 00:43:33,876 Get a good steam going. -I don't want to beef. 854 00:43:33,878 --> 00:43:36,112 -Let go of your fears and beef. 855 00:43:36,114 --> 00:43:37,780 -My fear is beef! 856 00:43:37,782 --> 00:43:41,250 And pork and chicken and all that gross stuff! 857 00:43:41,252 --> 00:43:42,919 No one respects that. 858 00:43:42,921 --> 00:43:44,287 I'll never fit in here. 859 00:43:44,289 --> 00:43:45,722 -Don't get cranky with me, pledge! 860 00:43:45,724 --> 00:43:47,223 Just because I like you 861 00:43:47,225 --> 00:43:49,258 doesn't mean you're getting out of that box early. 862 00:43:51,795 --> 00:43:53,396 You, uh -- you hungry? 863 00:43:55,332 --> 00:43:59,636 You know, through my lens, I see the souls of my bros. 864 00:43:59,638 --> 00:44:02,005 I've seen your inner truth. 865 00:44:02,007 --> 00:44:03,740 You've got beef in you. 866 00:44:03,742 --> 00:44:05,074 I'm not gonna let you quit. 867 00:44:05,076 --> 00:44:06,876 You have too much potential. 868 00:44:58,429 --> 00:45:01,698 Oh, Brock, how am I supposed to avenge you 869 00:45:01,700 --> 00:45:05,168 if I can't find any stupid clues? 870 00:45:05,969 --> 00:45:08,371 Anyway, good to see you, like -- 871 00:45:09,873 --> 00:45:11,274 Whoa. 872 00:45:22,086 --> 00:45:24,153 Oh! 873 00:45:24,155 --> 00:45:26,155 Clues! 874 00:45:27,157 --> 00:45:28,024 -Oh, no! 875 00:45:31,763 --> 00:45:34,230 -Can you hold my hair back, bro? 876 00:45:36,366 --> 00:45:38,367 -Clues! 877 00:45:41,405 --> 00:45:42,872 -Brock. 878 00:45:42,874 --> 00:45:45,208 Is that you, Brock? 879 00:45:49,079 --> 00:45:51,013 -Yes. -Strange. 880 00:45:51,015 --> 00:45:55,952 I have memories of your corpse, a flagpole... 881 00:45:55,954 --> 00:45:56,953 your anus. 882 00:45:58,222 --> 00:45:59,922 -Must have been a dream. 883 00:45:59,924 --> 00:46:01,157 -I don't dream. 884 00:46:01,159 --> 00:46:03,159 -You should try it. It's fun. 885 00:46:03,161 --> 00:46:05,495 You can fly, you can fuck whatever you want. 886 00:46:05,497 --> 00:46:07,330 It's great. 887 00:46:07,332 --> 00:46:09,999 -What's that on your face, Brock? 888 00:46:10,001 --> 00:46:12,201 -It's chocolate. 889 00:46:14,304 --> 00:46:16,405 I'm saving it for later. 890 00:46:16,407 --> 00:46:17,440 -Did you miss your brother? 891 00:46:17,442 --> 00:46:19,408 -Brent? 892 00:46:19,410 --> 00:46:22,845 No, he -- he's a loser. 893 00:46:24,882 --> 00:46:26,382 -Peculiar. 894 00:46:26,384 --> 00:46:28,251 You used to cry every night 895 00:46:28,253 --> 00:46:32,488 for having pushed him away to keep him safe from this... 896 00:46:32,490 --> 00:46:34,056 nightmare. 897 00:46:36,059 --> 00:46:38,027 Dance with me, Brock. 898 00:46:38,029 --> 00:46:40,396 Dance with me, just like we did in 1986 899 00:46:40,398 --> 00:46:42,265 at the rhythm and blues mixer. 900 00:46:42,267 --> 00:46:44,200 -That's when the second string of murders started happening! 901 00:46:44,202 --> 00:46:46,202 Do you remember -- -Dance now. 902 00:46:46,204 --> 00:46:48,538 -But my investigation -- -Now we dance. 903 00:47:08,492 --> 00:47:09,859 Catch me. 904 00:47:12,095 --> 00:47:13,496 -Whoa! 905 00:47:13,498 --> 00:47:15,331 Heavy! 906 00:47:15,333 --> 00:47:16,499 Ohh! 907 00:47:16,501 --> 00:47:18,968 Oh, no! Oh, no. 908 00:47:18,970 --> 00:47:20,436 No, no, no, no, no. Come on. 909 00:47:20,438 --> 00:47:22,405 Sam-- Samzy? 910 00:47:22,407 --> 00:47:25,474 You're okay! You're okay, Samzy! 911 00:47:25,476 --> 00:47:29,212 Heavy! Come on! Come on! 912 00:47:29,214 --> 00:47:30,513 Think, Brent. Think, Brent. 913 00:47:30,515 --> 00:47:32,215 Everybody likes you. You're a good guy. 914 00:47:32,217 --> 00:47:34,250 They'll believe you. Samzy, Samzy... 915 00:47:34,252 --> 00:47:36,152 -Oh, my God! 916 00:47:38,255 --> 00:47:41,390 I see what's going on here. 917 00:47:41,392 --> 00:47:44,126 He's wasted on beer! 918 00:47:44,128 --> 00:47:46,395 You lied to me! 919 00:47:46,397 --> 00:47:48,464 Aah! 920 00:47:51,969 --> 00:47:53,302 -This coffee's so lame. 921 00:47:53,304 --> 00:47:56,906 -Aah! -Did somebody say orange juice? 922 00:47:56,908 --> 00:47:58,908 -Oh, oh, oh God! 923 00:47:58,910 --> 00:48:00,476 The beer! 924 00:48:00,478 --> 00:48:02,912 Oh, God! Oh, God! 925 00:48:02,914 --> 00:48:04,580 Oh, fuck you, tree! No! 926 00:48:04,582 --> 00:48:09,285 Oh, beer! No! No! 927 00:48:09,287 --> 00:48:11,520 Oh, God, no! Oh, no! 928 00:48:11,522 --> 00:48:12,622 Aah! 929 00:48:19,129 --> 00:48:21,430 Oh, it can't be! 930 00:48:21,432 --> 00:48:23,933 Oh, beer! 931 00:48:23,935 --> 00:48:26,402 Beer! 932 00:48:26,404 --> 00:48:28,004 Oh, beer! 933 00:48:28,006 --> 00:48:30,306 Oh! 934 00:48:30,308 --> 00:48:34,310 Oh, it's still cold! 935 00:48:34,312 --> 00:48:36,412 Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho! 936 00:48:36,414 --> 00:48:38,080 Oh! 937 00:48:38,082 --> 00:48:42,151 Oh, perfect! Now I just need the tap. 938 00:48:42,653 --> 00:48:44,353 Where's the... 939 00:48:44,355 --> 00:48:45,922 Where's the tap?! 940 00:49:16,653 --> 00:49:19,021 -It's all head. 941 00:49:26,129 --> 00:49:28,230 -So, Hamlet's not in the play. 942 00:49:28,232 --> 00:49:30,366 -No, he's in it. It's just not about him. 943 00:49:30,368 --> 00:49:32,001 It's about these two side characters 944 00:49:32,003 --> 00:49:33,202 that nobody thought were important. 945 00:49:33,204 --> 00:49:35,504 -Seems unnecessarily pretentious. 946 00:49:38,508 --> 00:49:40,443 -What?! Aah! 947 00:49:40,445 --> 00:49:41,978 -Boom! 948 00:49:41,980 --> 00:49:43,679 Oh, yeah! 949 00:49:47,451 --> 00:49:49,118 -All right, pledge. 950 00:49:49,120 --> 00:49:50,386 You're in the final stretch 951 00:49:50,388 --> 00:49:52,588 of the Delta Bi biannual bicep gauntlet. 952 00:49:52,590 --> 00:49:54,423 You've lost to pretty much every bro here. 953 00:49:54,425 --> 00:49:55,624 Now you're gonna face me. 954 00:49:55,626 --> 00:49:56,625 And if you lose, 955 00:49:56,627 --> 00:49:58,127 you're going in the barrel, 956 00:49:58,129 --> 00:49:59,228 and I'm gonna read what you've been writing 957 00:49:59,230 --> 00:50:01,097 in that stupid diary of yours! 958 00:50:01,099 --> 00:50:02,631 -My journal. 959 00:50:02,633 --> 00:50:04,433 -All right. 960 00:50:04,435 --> 00:50:06,002 -Kick his ass. 961 00:50:06,004 --> 00:50:07,636 3, tres, go! 962 00:50:07,638 --> 00:50:13,142 -I already know what today's entry's gonna be. 963 00:50:13,144 --> 00:50:14,377 "Dear Diary, I lost, 964 00:50:14,379 --> 00:50:16,245 and now I'm in a barrel." -No. 965 00:50:16,247 --> 00:50:17,279 -Yeah! -No. 966 00:50:17,281 --> 00:50:18,581 -Yeah! -Please. 967 00:50:18,583 --> 00:50:20,449 -"Please" what? -Please don't beat me! 968 00:50:20,451 --> 00:50:21,550 -Okay. Maybe. 969 00:50:21,552 --> 00:50:23,552 Just kidding. -Ohh! 970 00:50:23,554 --> 00:50:25,688 - Aah! 971 00:50:25,690 --> 00:50:27,623 -Yeah! -Yay! 972 00:50:27,625 --> 00:50:29,158 -Hey, guys! -Aww! 973 00:50:29,160 --> 00:50:31,394 -Babe, what the fuck are you doing here?! 974 00:50:31,396 --> 00:50:32,762 -Yeah! What the fuck, Samantha?! 975 00:50:32,764 --> 00:50:34,230 -What the fuck, Todd?! 976 00:50:34,232 --> 00:50:35,431 You can't let your girlfriend come! 977 00:50:35,433 --> 00:50:36,432 You know the rules! 978 00:50:36,434 --> 00:50:37,600 -I didn't let her come! 979 00:50:37,602 --> 00:50:38,567 What?! 980 00:50:38,569 --> 00:50:40,403 Babe, you can't be here. 981 00:50:40,405 --> 00:50:42,638 -I know you guys like beer, so I brought beer 982 00:50:42,640 --> 00:50:44,440 so you guys like me. Right? 983 00:50:44,442 --> 00:50:47,510 -We can like beer without having to like you, Samantha. 984 00:50:47,512 --> 00:50:49,578 Samzy, get the beer! -Sorry. 985 00:50:49,580 --> 00:50:52,515 -See? Now we hate her. -Yeah, fuck her. 986 00:50:52,517 --> 00:50:54,683 -Don't we have an extra room? -Oh, yeah. 987 00:50:54,685 --> 00:50:55,785 We got all the room in the world. 988 00:50:55,787 --> 00:50:57,486 It's called outside! 989 00:50:57,488 --> 00:51:00,289 -The rules do state that during bicep bi-annuals, 990 00:51:00,291 --> 00:51:04,193 all females have to stay outside... 991 00:51:04,195 --> 00:51:06,162 where there is more room. 992 00:51:06,164 --> 00:51:07,463 -But I brought beer, 993 00:51:07,465 --> 00:51:09,465 and you guys stole my motor home! 994 00:51:09,467 --> 00:51:11,367 -Todd, you broke the rules. You got to go with her. 995 00:51:11,369 --> 00:51:13,069 -You can't let me go outside with her! 996 00:51:13,071 --> 00:51:15,604 She's gonna try and take my virginity. 997 00:51:15,606 --> 00:51:17,540 -No, I would never. 998 00:51:17,542 --> 00:51:19,108 -If I remember correctly, 999 00:51:19,110 --> 00:51:22,845 and I do, there's a tent in the shed out back. 1000 00:51:22,847 --> 00:51:25,347 -Yep, there's a tent in the shed. 1001 00:51:25,349 --> 00:51:27,083 -The tent's located in the shed. 1002 00:51:27,085 --> 00:51:29,185 -That's where the tent is. In the shed. 1003 00:51:29,187 --> 00:51:31,520 -Tent's in the shed. Tent's in the shed. 1004 00:51:31,522 --> 00:51:33,089 Tent's in the shed. 1005 00:51:33,091 --> 00:51:34,190 -No! 1006 00:51:34,192 --> 00:51:35,458 -What's it gonna be? 1007 00:51:35,460 --> 00:51:38,194 Are you a Delta Bi or a Samantha guy? 1008 00:51:41,465 --> 00:51:43,365 -What do you think? 1009 00:51:50,774 --> 00:51:52,374 -Tent's in the shed. 1010 00:51:55,847 --> 00:51:59,248 -Looks like you get a stay of execution, pledge. 1011 00:52:06,323 --> 00:52:08,457 -I don't even want to look at you right now! 1012 00:52:08,459 --> 00:52:14,830 You've ruined my l-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ife! 1013 00:52:14,832 --> 00:52:17,199 We're getting this tent, and we're going to bed! 1014 00:52:17,201 --> 00:52:18,901 That's it! 1015 00:52:21,671 --> 00:52:23,672 -Oh, that's fine! That's fine. 1016 00:52:23,674 --> 00:52:24,740 -Babe... -We can just go to bed. 1017 00:52:24,742 --> 00:52:26,242 -Yeah, I'm tired. 1018 00:52:26,244 --> 00:52:27,510 -I didn't mean to get you kicked out. 1019 00:52:27,512 --> 00:52:28,811 -Babe... -I am so sorry 1020 00:52:28,813 --> 00:52:30,613 that I'm a girl, baby. -You should be! 1021 00:52:30,615 --> 00:52:32,248 -Who needs the Delta Bis? 1022 00:52:32,250 --> 00:52:33,849 I think they're just jealous of you anyway. 1023 00:52:33,851 --> 00:52:35,885 -Babe, babe! 1024 00:52:35,887 --> 00:52:37,586 -Yeah, you are the smartest bro in the frat. 1025 00:52:37,588 --> 00:52:40,556 I mean, you've got career prospects, healthy gums, 1026 00:52:40,558 --> 00:52:42,391 I mean, amazing bone structure. -Stop. Your hands are cold. 1027 00:52:42,393 --> 00:52:43,859 -That tickles. -Your body is 1028 00:52:43,861 --> 00:52:46,262 so fucking jacked and fertile! 1029 00:52:46,264 --> 00:52:49,465 It's like your sperm count must be in the billions or something. 1030 00:52:49,467 --> 00:52:51,534 -Oh, oh! 1031 00:52:51,536 --> 00:52:53,169 Babe... -I mean, those Delta Bis 1032 00:52:53,171 --> 00:52:56,572 should be getting on their knees to worship you. 1033 00:52:56,574 --> 00:52:58,240 -Tell me more about my bros. 1034 00:52:58,242 --> 00:53:00,209 -Oh. Found it. 1035 00:53:01,645 --> 00:53:04,180 -Oh. 1036 00:53:04,182 --> 00:53:05,881 Oh, Samantha. 1037 00:53:05,883 --> 00:53:07,283 Oh, baby. 1038 00:53:07,285 --> 00:53:08,717 -Stay on target. -Oh, Sam. 1039 00:53:08,719 --> 00:53:10,553 -Eye on the prize! 1040 00:53:10,555 --> 00:53:12,221 -These air holes you poked in the condom aren't working, babe. 1041 00:53:12,223 --> 00:53:13,422 -No, stay the course! 1042 00:53:13,424 --> 00:53:15,191 -Little Todd still can't breathe. 1043 00:53:15,193 --> 00:53:17,760 He looks like a -- a dude jammed into something. 1044 00:53:17,762 --> 00:53:19,595 -It's usually hard. 1045 00:53:19,597 --> 00:53:21,197 -It normally is! 1046 00:53:21,199 --> 00:53:22,531 -Does this help? 1047 00:53:22,533 --> 00:53:25,201 -Yeah. Yeah, that's better. -Okay, good. 1048 00:53:25,203 --> 00:53:26,969 -Okay. -You've got this, Todd! 1049 00:53:26,971 --> 00:53:28,637 You are in the zone! 1050 00:53:28,639 --> 00:53:30,839 You are in the home stretch! -Please! 1051 00:53:30,841 --> 00:53:32,808 -You are killing it back there! -Don't look at me! 1052 00:53:35,512 --> 00:53:38,847 -Ahh, I'm having sex. 1053 00:53:38,849 --> 00:53:41,584 -Don't you quit now, boy! Don't you quit now! 1054 00:53:41,586 --> 00:53:42,985 -Now -- now I lost it. 1055 00:53:42,987 --> 00:53:45,387 -Put your Delta Bi seed in me! 1056 00:53:45,389 --> 00:53:46,689 -My seed?! 1057 00:53:46,691 --> 00:53:48,624 Aah! 1058 00:53:57,534 --> 00:53:59,702 -Thank you, Toddy. 1059 00:54:02,340 --> 00:54:03,439 Mm. 1060 00:54:05,475 --> 00:54:07,276 -Should've pulled out. 1061 00:54:12,450 --> 00:54:13,849 -How much further, Z.Q.? 1062 00:54:13,851 --> 00:54:16,352 -Our journey will end when it ends, Sizzler. 1063 00:54:16,354 --> 00:54:18,287 And once you beef, a whole new journey 1064 00:54:18,289 --> 00:54:19,355 begins for you. 1065 00:54:19,357 --> 00:54:21,624 - Oh! 1066 00:54:21,626 --> 00:54:24,360 What's that?! -Tree noises. 1067 00:54:26,396 --> 00:54:27,963 Aah! 1068 00:54:33,670 --> 00:54:35,304 Oh. Oh, no! 1069 00:54:35,306 --> 00:54:37,673 Oh! -Z.Q., are you okay?! 1070 00:54:37,675 --> 00:54:39,375 -No! I'm not okay! 1071 00:54:39,377 --> 00:54:40,976 Kick my camera in my general direction! 1072 00:54:40,978 --> 00:54:42,678 This is an incredible scene! 1073 00:54:42,680 --> 00:54:44,380 -I'm getting out of this thing. -No! 1074 00:54:44,382 --> 00:54:45,447 -But I could save you! I just 1075 00:54:45,449 --> 00:54:46,548 have to get out of this box! 1076 00:54:46,550 --> 00:54:49,385 -Not until you beef! Sizzler! 1077 00:54:52,922 --> 00:54:55,457 -I'm trapped! I'm trapped! 1078 00:54:56,793 --> 00:54:59,361 -No! Ha ha! I'm on my way! 1079 00:54:59,363 --> 00:55:00,529 I have a rope! 1080 00:55:00,531 --> 00:55:01,430 Hang tight, Sizzler! -Aah! 1081 00:55:01,432 --> 00:55:03,932 Aah! 1082 00:55:06,770 --> 00:55:09,538 Amazing! 1083 00:55:11,842 --> 00:55:13,609 -Rainin' men. 1084 00:55:14,577 --> 00:55:17,579 -Come on, Got to beef! 1085 00:55:17,581 --> 00:55:18,847 Got to beef! 1086 00:55:18,849 --> 00:55:22,351 I got to beef! Aaah! 1087 00:55:22,353 --> 00:55:24,320 Aaah! 1088 00:55:24,322 --> 00:55:25,954 Aaah! 1089 00:55:25,956 --> 00:55:28,891 Aaah! 1090 00:55:28,893 --> 00:55:31,860 -And the, uh, number-one reason 1091 00:55:31,862 --> 00:55:37,366 why cops just can't catch a break, uh... 1092 00:55:37,368 --> 00:55:38,634 My dad beat me, 1093 00:55:38,636 --> 00:55:41,337 and now I sleep with my eyes open! 1094 00:55:42,706 --> 00:55:43,772 -Boo! 1095 00:55:43,774 --> 00:55:44,907 -God! No! 1096 00:55:44,909 --> 00:55:46,909 -You can tell he's a virgin! 1097 00:55:46,911 --> 00:55:49,078 Oranges! 1098 00:55:49,080 --> 00:55:52,548 Oranges! Oranges! Get away from me! 1099 00:55:52,550 --> 00:55:54,616 -Sminkle! Wake up! 1100 00:55:54,618 --> 00:55:56,418 -Number 6, please don't kill me! 1101 00:55:56,420 --> 00:55:58,554 -It's just a dream! We've got to move this car, 1102 00:55:58,556 --> 00:56:00,022 and I can't do it on my own. 1103 00:56:00,024 --> 00:56:02,624 I need your muscles. -Oh. 1104 00:56:02,626 --> 00:56:05,094 Well, why didn't you say so? 1105 00:56:05,096 --> 00:56:07,863 All I need is a hearty breakfast and, uh... 1106 00:56:07,865 --> 00:56:09,531 Hey. 1107 00:56:09,533 --> 00:56:12,501 The wolves cleaned up all the deadness. 1108 00:56:12,503 --> 00:56:15,704 And they filled up the tires. 1109 00:56:15,706 --> 00:56:19,041 Boy...those wolves are... 1110 00:56:21,511 --> 00:56:24,813 ...getting pretty smart. 1111 00:56:24,815 --> 00:56:26,915 -Just push, damn it! 1112 00:56:26,917 --> 00:56:28,517 -Brace yourself, 1113 00:56:28,519 --> 00:56:31,920 'cause you just bought yourself a one-way ticket 1114 00:56:31,922 --> 00:56:35,124 to the motherfucking gun show! 1115 00:56:37,695 --> 00:56:43,031 Fu-- Havin' a good time at the gun show! 1116 00:56:43,033 --> 00:56:45,667 Havin' a good -- 1117 00:56:45,669 --> 00:56:49,538 Aah! Oh, those Dream Bros were right -- 1118 00:56:49,540 --> 00:56:52,674 I can't do anything right. 1119 00:56:52,676 --> 00:56:56,545 -Look, here are the top 10 reasons why Sminkle is great. 1120 00:56:56,547 --> 00:56:59,848 10, he greets every day with a smile. 1121 00:56:59,850 --> 00:57:02,484 9, he wants to help children. 1122 00:57:02,486 --> 00:57:04,686 -I want to bang children! 1123 00:57:04,688 --> 00:57:07,689 -8, he wants to bang children's minds. 1124 00:57:07,691 --> 00:57:10,125 -No, it's not as catchy. No, it's too long. 1125 00:57:10,127 --> 00:57:11,894 It's too thought-out. It's too involved. 1126 00:57:11,896 --> 00:57:14,062 -7, he wants to bang children. 1127 00:57:14,064 --> 00:57:16,932 -Bang 'em good. -Don't give up, Sminkle. 1128 00:57:16,934 --> 00:57:18,634 We got to get you to the lake house 1129 00:57:18,636 --> 00:57:20,869 so that you can solve Chico's orange crisis! 1130 00:57:20,871 --> 00:57:24,506 -Virgin strength! 1131 00:57:24,508 --> 00:57:27,843 -Ah! 6, he's asleep right now 1132 00:57:27,845 --> 00:57:28,744 yet still somehow pushing. 1133 00:57:28,746 --> 00:57:30,212 Uh... 1134 00:57:30,214 --> 00:57:32,181 I, uh... 1135 00:57:32,183 --> 00:57:34,082 2, he's awake right now, 1136 00:57:34,084 --> 00:57:35,451 and that's a good thing! 1137 00:57:37,521 --> 00:57:41,824 1, he probably doesn't deserve to die. 1138 00:57:43,694 --> 00:57:45,661 Yes! -Yes! 1139 00:57:45,663 --> 00:57:47,162 -Oh, my God! Yes, yes, yes, yes! 1140 00:57:47,164 --> 00:57:48,197 -Whoo-hoo-hoo! 1141 00:57:55,138 --> 00:57:56,705 -Oh, no. 1142 00:58:15,892 --> 00:58:17,526 -Oh, no. I forgot my keys! 1143 00:58:17,528 --> 00:58:18,861 Aah! 1144 00:58:18,863 --> 00:58:20,963 -Every year, thousands of idiots are -- 1145 00:58:30,941 --> 00:58:32,875 -Guys! 1146 00:58:49,058 --> 00:58:51,093 -Hey, friend, come on in. 1147 00:58:51,095 --> 00:58:53,061 It's nice, and it's warm. 1148 00:58:53,063 --> 00:58:56,031 -Quit remembering your dead brother and jump in the water. 1149 00:58:56,033 --> 00:58:57,533 -Brent, come on, man! 1150 00:58:57,535 --> 00:58:59,067 You can do it! Brent! 1151 00:58:59,069 --> 00:59:00,669 Oh, take off that shirt. 1152 00:59:00,671 --> 00:59:02,838 You'll love it! 1153 00:59:02,840 --> 00:59:04,740 -Come on in, bro. Get in the water. 1154 00:59:04,742 --> 00:59:07,075 -In the water! -It's so wet! 1155 00:59:07,077 --> 00:59:08,544 -Yay! 1156 00:59:08,546 --> 00:59:09,745 You did it! 1157 00:59:09,747 --> 00:59:12,014 Congrats, buddy. 1158 00:59:12,016 --> 00:59:13,815 -We're having such a good time. 1159 00:59:13,817 --> 00:59:16,919 -Aren't we, Brent? -Yeah. 1160 00:59:16,921 --> 00:59:19,087 I guess we are. 1161 00:59:19,089 --> 00:59:20,689 Yeah! 1162 00:59:20,691 --> 00:59:21,790 -Told you so. 1163 00:59:21,792 --> 00:59:23,592 -Nice catch. 1164 00:59:23,594 --> 00:59:24,893 -Whoa! -Oh, no! 1165 00:59:26,996 --> 00:59:28,230 -Daddy, no, don't go. 1166 00:59:28,232 --> 00:59:29,731 I'm sorry I'm a girl. 1167 00:59:29,733 --> 00:59:31,166 Daddy, no! No! 1168 00:59:31,168 --> 00:59:33,101 No, I promise I'll have you a grandson. 1169 00:59:33,103 --> 00:59:34,903 It'll make it all better! Wait. 1170 00:59:34,905 --> 00:59:36,305 What's that, daddy? 1171 00:59:36,307 --> 00:59:39,107 You -- you'll be right back? Oh, okay. 1172 00:59:39,109 --> 00:59:41,209 I'll wait here on the stoop for you. 1173 00:59:41,211 --> 00:59:42,844 Bye. 1174 00:59:42,846 --> 00:59:45,247 Mm. 1175 00:59:45,249 --> 00:59:47,115 Oh, Todd, I had the most wonderful -- 1176 00:59:47,117 --> 00:59:49,785 Aah! Aaaaaah! 1177 00:59:53,957 --> 00:59:56,058 -Whoo! Yeah! 1178 00:59:56,060 --> 00:59:57,726 -Shh! -Oh! 1179 00:59:57,728 --> 00:59:59,995 Look, guys, Z.Q.'s overcome his fear of heights! 1180 00:59:59,997 --> 01:00:01,196 -Wow! 1181 01:01:23,179 --> 01:01:24,846 -Oh, my God! Torsos! 1182 01:01:25,148 --> 01:01:27,683 -Hey! Todd is dead! Help me! 1183 01:01:36,693 --> 01:01:38,226 -So, Z.Q.'s dead? 1184 01:01:38,228 --> 01:01:40,362 Samantha shows up covered in blood? 1185 01:01:40,364 --> 01:01:43,231 I knew she couldn't be trusted, but she's a killer! 1186 01:01:43,233 --> 01:01:45,367 - Please let me in! 1187 01:01:45,369 --> 01:01:48,103 I just got punched in the face, and my boyfriend's dead! 1188 01:01:48,105 --> 01:01:51,239 This weekend is not going at all how I planned it. 1189 01:01:51,241 --> 01:01:53,041 -Brent, you get the door. 1190 01:01:53,043 --> 01:01:55,310 Samzy, you played ball in college, right? 1191 01:01:55,312 --> 01:01:58,113 -Starting pitcher, East Chico Rapiers. 1192 01:01:58,115 --> 01:01:59,114 -Batter's up, bro. 1193 01:01:59,116 --> 01:02:00,248 -Guys, I don't know -- 1194 01:02:00,250 --> 01:02:01,750 -We're killing the killer! 1195 01:02:01,752 --> 01:02:04,453 It's just like old times, Brock! Remember? 1196 01:02:04,455 --> 01:02:06,722 Go, Rapiers! 1197 01:02:06,724 --> 01:02:07,956 -Please! 1198 01:02:07,958 --> 01:02:09,391 -Just move. 1199 01:02:09,393 --> 01:02:11,793 Your brother's more Rapier than you'll ever be. 1200 01:02:11,795 --> 01:02:13,762 -Please let me in! 1201 01:02:13,764 --> 01:02:15,897 -Who is it? -It's Samantha! 1202 01:02:15,899 --> 01:02:17,799 -Samantha who? 1203 01:02:17,801 --> 01:02:19,835 -Samantha Samantha! Let me in! 1204 01:02:19,837 --> 01:02:20,902 I'm Todd's girlfriend! 1205 01:02:20,904 --> 01:02:22,437 I've tried to bang all of you! 1206 01:02:22,439 --> 01:02:24,940 -Todd doesn't have a girlfriend. 1207 01:02:24,942 --> 01:02:26,908 He's still discovering himself. 1208 01:02:26,910 --> 01:02:28,510 -Just let me in. 1209 01:02:28,512 --> 01:02:30,879 -Okay. 1210 01:02:33,416 --> 01:02:34,750 -Ohh! 1211 01:02:34,752 --> 01:02:36,952 -Go, Rapiers! 1212 01:02:36,954 --> 01:02:39,421 -Wait a minute. Samantha couldn't be Motherface. 1213 01:02:39,423 --> 01:02:42,157 Todd told me she was on that Booze Cruise in Cabo 1214 01:02:42,159 --> 01:02:43,458 when Brock died. 1215 01:02:43,460 --> 01:02:45,761 Guys, Samantha couldn't be Motherface. 1216 01:02:45,763 --> 01:02:47,329 Todd told me she was on that Booze Cruise 1217 01:02:47,331 --> 01:02:48,764 in Cabo when Brock died. 1218 01:02:48,766 --> 01:02:50,031 -Whoa! 1219 01:02:50,033 --> 01:02:51,900 Motherface? -Motherface is dead! 1220 01:02:51,902 --> 01:02:53,201 We killed her twice, Brock, remember? 1221 01:02:53,203 --> 01:02:54,903 Rememb-- Br-Br-Broc-- Broc-- 1222 01:02:54,905 --> 01:02:56,138 Broc-- Broc-- 1223 01:02:56,140 --> 01:02:57,806 Broc-- Broc-- Broc-- 1224 01:02:57,808 --> 01:02:59,174 -Ba-gawk! She's dead. 1225 01:02:59,176 --> 01:03:01,009 Motherface is dead. -She's dead. 1226 01:03:01,011 --> 01:03:04,446 But Samantha is here, alive, covered in blood! 1227 01:03:04,448 --> 01:03:06,181 -We're all covered in blood! 1228 01:03:06,183 --> 01:03:08,550 Are you guys daft or something?! 1229 01:03:08,552 --> 01:03:10,852 Motherface is back! 1230 01:03:10,854 --> 01:03:13,822 She killed Todd, she killed Z.Q., 1231 01:03:13,824 --> 01:03:15,991 and she killed my brother, Brock! 1232 01:03:15,993 --> 01:03:17,425 -Samzy, throw another bat at him. 1233 01:03:17,427 --> 01:03:19,060 -I'm out of bats. -Fine. 1234 01:03:19,062 --> 01:03:21,863 I'll defeat him using good looks and logic. 1235 01:03:21,865 --> 01:03:24,833 You are stu-pid. 1236 01:03:24,835 --> 01:03:26,134 -Brock, you always had a plan 1237 01:03:26,136 --> 01:03:27,202 when these kinds of things happened. 1238 01:03:27,204 --> 01:03:28,203 Brock, What's the plan? 1239 01:03:28,205 --> 01:03:29,971 -Don't drag Brock into this! 1240 01:03:29,973 --> 01:03:33,041 -Don't tell him where to drag my dead brother! 1241 01:03:33,043 --> 01:03:36,144 I already lost him once when he joined the Delta Bis, 1242 01:03:36,146 --> 01:03:39,481 and then you let him get murdered by Motherface 1243 01:03:39,483 --> 01:03:41,249 right under your noses! 1244 01:03:41,251 --> 01:03:43,318 -That's fine. You know what? 1245 01:03:43,320 --> 01:03:44,419 I'm rescinding your pledge. 1246 01:03:44,421 --> 01:03:46,454 -Oh, no! 1247 01:03:46,456 --> 01:03:48,323 I don't care! 1248 01:03:48,325 --> 01:03:49,958 I'm not even here to pledge! 1249 01:03:49,960 --> 01:03:51,459 I'm here for Brock -- 1250 01:03:51,461 --> 01:03:55,263 to find out what happened to him and avenge his death, 1251 01:03:55,265 --> 01:03:59,100 not to bro out with you dudes! 1252 01:03:59,102 --> 01:04:01,837 -You lied to us. -No. 1253 01:04:01,839 --> 01:04:03,004 No, no, no, no, no. 1254 01:04:03,006 --> 01:04:05,574 -I trusted you! 1255 01:04:05,576 --> 01:04:09,010 -Who are you?! 1256 01:04:09,012 --> 01:04:12,113 -New plan -- time to beat the shit out of 1257 01:04:12,115 --> 01:04:14,249 dead Brock's living brother, Brent. 1258 01:04:15,551 --> 01:04:18,253 -Brock has a brother? -I told you, Samzy. 1259 01:04:18,255 --> 01:04:20,255 God damn it. -Oh, my God! 1260 01:04:20,257 --> 01:04:22,257 You're little Brent Chirino! 1261 01:04:22,259 --> 01:04:25,126 I have heard so much about you. 1262 01:04:25,128 --> 01:04:26,494 You can -- Wow. Okay. 1263 01:04:26,496 --> 01:04:28,897 So you can understand how meeting someone 1264 01:04:28,899 --> 01:04:31,099 that looks exactly like somebody that you thought was dead 1265 01:04:31,101 --> 01:04:33,969 would be exceptionally confusing. 1266 01:04:35,905 --> 01:04:39,875 -What the hell are you doing out of the beef box, pledge?! 1267 01:04:43,179 --> 01:04:45,647 -Amazing! 1268 01:04:48,117 --> 01:04:49,150 -Rainin' men. 1269 01:04:49,152 --> 01:04:50,652 -Oh, God -- Z.Q. 1270 01:04:50,654 --> 01:04:52,187 -Aah! -There! 1271 01:04:52,189 --> 01:04:54,556 That's where I beefed. 1272 01:04:54,558 --> 01:04:56,458 -Pause the tape. 1273 01:04:58,527 --> 01:05:01,229 Enhance. 1274 01:05:01,231 --> 01:05:04,666 I said enhance, damn you! 1275 01:05:04,668 --> 01:05:07,936 Now squint. 1276 01:05:07,938 --> 01:05:09,037 -Motherface! 1277 01:05:09,039 --> 01:05:10,305 -Who? -I knew it. 1278 01:05:10,307 --> 01:05:11,339 -Yes. -Whoa. 1279 01:05:11,341 --> 01:05:13,642 -It's true. 1280 01:05:13,644 --> 01:05:15,176 She's back. 1281 01:05:15,178 --> 01:05:16,678 But I've been investigating, 1282 01:05:16,680 --> 01:05:20,548 and I think I know who she is and how to stop her. 1283 01:05:20,550 --> 01:05:22,550 I thought I could do it alone. 1284 01:05:22,552 --> 01:05:24,286 But I need you. 1285 01:05:26,389 --> 01:05:27,989 You're the only bros I have left. 1286 01:05:27,991 --> 01:05:32,928 -Step aside, Brock's identical twin brother. 1287 01:05:32,930 --> 01:05:35,430 Let a real Delta Bi handle this. 1288 01:05:35,432 --> 01:05:38,700 You see, after surviving two party massacres myself, 1289 01:05:38,702 --> 01:05:43,371 I grew weary of relying on Brock's plans to save us all. 1290 01:05:43,373 --> 01:05:46,641 To wit, I created an identical robot duplicate of myself 1291 01:05:46,643 --> 01:05:51,413 for one, singular purpose -- to kill Motherface. 1292 01:05:51,415 --> 01:05:55,216 -Weird. -It's up in the attic. 1293 01:05:55,218 --> 01:05:57,185 -Oh! 1294 01:05:57,187 --> 01:05:59,087 Oh! That's it! 1295 01:05:59,089 --> 01:06:00,488 Robot! 1296 01:06:00,490 --> 01:06:02,324 In the attic. 1297 01:06:02,326 --> 01:06:04,326 -Oh! -Okay. 1298 01:06:04,328 --> 01:06:08,063 Well, with that in mind, you bros just kick your feet up 1299 01:06:08,065 --> 01:06:10,365 and let me and Robo-Samzy take care of this one. 1300 01:06:10,367 --> 01:06:12,100 -I don't know if you should -- -Just, uh... 1301 01:06:16,105 --> 01:06:18,373 That's odd. There appears to be some kind of malfunction. 1302 01:06:18,375 --> 01:06:20,508 I'll just do a quick check -- -No! No! 1303 01:06:20,510 --> 01:06:23,979 I was just thinking, maybe, if that doesn't work, 1304 01:06:23,981 --> 01:06:26,381 then we should have a plan B. 1305 01:06:26,383 --> 01:06:28,717 - I got this one. 1306 01:06:28,719 --> 01:06:31,386 -Yeah, there he goes. 1307 01:06:31,388 --> 01:06:34,189 -Secret door open. 1308 01:06:34,191 --> 01:06:36,758 -And there he's going. 1309 01:06:36,760 --> 01:06:39,294 Oh, Jesus. -Robo-Samzy? 1310 01:06:39,296 --> 01:06:40,462 Robo-Samzy?! 1311 01:06:40,464 --> 01:06:42,530 Oh, no! Robo-Samzy! 1312 01:06:42,532 --> 01:06:45,266 You didn't try to dance, did you?! 1313 01:06:45,268 --> 01:06:48,636 You beautiful fool! Who did this to you?! 1314 01:06:48,638 --> 01:06:51,773 -It was...Bro... 1315 01:06:56,412 --> 01:06:58,313 -What is going on?! 1316 01:07:01,317 --> 01:07:02,584 Aah! Aah! Aah! 1317 01:07:02,586 --> 01:07:04,452 Aah! Aah! Aah! 1318 01:07:04,454 --> 01:07:05,787 Aah! Aah! Aah! 1319 01:07:05,789 --> 01:07:07,255 Aah! Aah! Aah! 1320 01:07:07,257 --> 01:07:09,057 Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah! 1321 01:07:09,059 --> 01:07:10,692 -I don't like that guy. 1322 01:07:13,029 --> 01:07:14,429 -Aah! Aah! 1323 01:07:19,068 --> 01:07:20,435 -What is happening?! 1324 01:07:20,437 --> 01:07:22,237 I had a plan this time! 1325 01:07:22,239 --> 01:07:23,738 I watched you die! 1326 01:07:23,740 --> 01:07:24,606 Twice! 1327 01:07:28,478 --> 01:07:29,411 Hmm? 1328 01:07:34,116 --> 01:07:36,084 -Why are you hitting yourself, huh? 1329 01:07:39,455 --> 01:07:41,723 -What are you -- I'm a little bitch! 1330 01:07:41,725 --> 01:07:43,091 I'm a little bitch! 1331 01:07:43,093 --> 01:07:44,659 I'm a little bitch! 1332 01:07:44,661 --> 01:07:46,494 I'm a little bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, 1333 01:07:46,496 --> 01:07:48,763 bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch! 1334 01:07:48,765 --> 01:07:50,098 -You killed my mother. 1335 01:07:52,168 --> 01:07:53,435 And my sister. 1336 01:07:55,671 --> 01:07:58,173 You at least deserve a tongue-lashing. 1337 01:07:58,175 --> 01:07:59,574 -Aah! 1338 01:07:59,576 --> 01:08:00,809 Aah! Aah! 1339 01:08:00,811 --> 01:08:02,644 Aah! Aah! 1340 01:08:02,646 --> 01:08:03,645 Aah! Aah! 1341 01:08:03,647 --> 01:08:05,713 Aah! 1342 01:08:15,758 --> 01:08:18,493 -What? No tongue? 1343 01:08:41,251 --> 01:08:43,284 -Call now, and we'll send you a second -- 1344 01:08:43,286 --> 01:08:45,487 Are you bored of the same -- 1345 01:08:45,489 --> 01:08:48,256 - No, no. Please. Please, God. 1346 01:08:48,258 --> 01:08:49,557 Please. Oh, no. 1347 01:08:49,559 --> 01:08:51,159 Oh, God, Candace. 1348 01:08:58,502 --> 01:09:01,769 Oh, God! 1349 01:09:06,675 --> 01:09:08,610 Virgin...tears. 1350 01:09:08,612 --> 01:09:09,644 --Aah. 1351 01:09:09,646 --> 01:09:11,713 Ugh. 1352 01:09:11,715 --> 01:09:13,648 Ew. 1353 01:09:13,650 --> 01:09:16,484 -You saved my life. -Well, yeah, you big dummy. 1354 01:09:16,486 --> 01:09:18,653 I mean, you know, honestly, this is the longest time 1355 01:09:18,655 --> 01:09:19,921 I've ever spent with another person, 1356 01:09:19,923 --> 01:09:21,589 and I've never really had a friend, 1357 01:09:21,591 --> 01:09:22,891 and no one's ever listened to my top 10 lists before 1358 01:09:22,893 --> 01:09:24,359 or had such pretty hair, 1359 01:09:24,361 --> 01:09:25,693 and when we were flying through the air, 1360 01:09:25,695 --> 01:09:27,428 I really thought we had a moment there, 1361 01:09:27,430 --> 01:09:28,796 and I honestly thought I could spend the rest of my life 1362 01:09:28,798 --> 01:09:30,498 flying through the air next to this person! 1363 01:09:30,500 --> 01:09:31,533 And I was honestly glad we didn't wear seat belts! 1364 01:09:31,535 --> 01:09:32,734 You know, fuck safety! 1365 01:09:32,736 --> 01:09:34,602 And I really thought that I lost you! 1366 01:09:34,604 --> 01:09:35,770 -Oh, Sminkle. 1367 01:09:35,772 --> 01:09:38,573 -Oh, Candace. 1368 01:09:38,575 --> 01:09:39,841 -I'm sorry. 1369 01:09:39,843 --> 01:09:41,242 -There's another guy, isn't there. 1370 01:09:41,244 --> 01:09:42,410 Gosh darn it. I should've known. 1371 01:09:42,412 --> 01:09:44,913 Classic Candace. 1372 01:09:44,915 --> 01:09:47,415 - Nice work, officer. 1373 01:09:55,792 --> 01:09:57,525 -Hey. 1374 01:09:57,527 --> 01:10:00,228 Sorry I abandoned you back there. 1375 01:10:00,230 --> 01:10:01,696 -That's okay, daddy -- 1376 01:10:01,698 --> 01:10:04,232 - I mean, Brent. - Brent. 1377 01:10:06,902 --> 01:10:08,836 I'm cold. 1378 01:10:23,919 --> 01:10:25,553 Are we gonna die, Brent? 1379 01:10:36,665 --> 01:10:38,433 -Hey, Sizzler, great job. 1380 01:10:38,435 --> 01:10:40,468 Why don't you go fuck off for a sec, all right? 1381 01:10:40,470 --> 01:10:43,871 -Sure. I'll go get my organic veggies upstairs. 1382 01:10:43,873 --> 01:10:45,540 -Grab a big bag of dicks. I don't care. 1383 01:10:48,277 --> 01:10:50,678 -Hey. 1384 01:10:50,680 --> 01:10:52,513 -Brock meant a lot to me. 1385 01:10:52,515 --> 01:10:55,883 And I thought, like a idiot, 1386 01:10:55,885 --> 01:10:58,253 that maybe you'd be like him, 1387 01:10:58,255 --> 01:10:59,854 and we could go on like nothing ever happened. 1388 01:10:59,856 --> 01:11:02,357 But something did happen. 1389 01:11:02,359 --> 01:11:03,424 You lied to me! 1390 01:11:03,426 --> 01:11:04,659 -Turbeaux, you can trust me. 1391 01:11:04,661 --> 01:11:06,494 We're in this together. -No! 1392 01:11:06,496 --> 01:11:08,663 Brock planned all my workouts for me! 1393 01:11:08,665 --> 01:11:10,932 We were supposed to do traps and lats the day he died! 1394 01:11:10,934 --> 01:11:12,767 Now look at me! 1395 01:11:12,769 --> 01:11:16,404 -If we do 10 sets of 20 reps on the lat pull-down machine, 1396 01:11:16,406 --> 01:11:19,807 I swear, we will sculpt you the V-taper of your dreams. 1397 01:11:19,809 --> 01:11:21,542 -You lied to me! 1398 01:11:21,544 --> 01:11:23,278 -I swear, I will never lie to you again. 1399 01:11:23,280 --> 01:11:24,612 -What if it's my birthday? 1400 01:11:24,614 --> 01:11:26,481 You take me to a quiet little bistro dinner. 1401 01:11:26,483 --> 01:11:27,815 Nothing too fancy? 1402 01:11:27,817 --> 01:11:30,385 And then you act like you "forgot your keys." 1403 01:11:30,387 --> 01:11:31,486 Then the lights go out. 1404 01:11:31,488 --> 01:11:32,920 Who turned out the lights? 1405 01:11:32,922 --> 01:11:34,622 Then the lights go back on. 1406 01:11:34,624 --> 01:11:35,990 All my friends are there. 1407 01:11:35,992 --> 01:11:37,525 And you know what it is? 1408 01:11:37,527 --> 01:11:40,828 It's a goddamn surprise birthday party! 1409 01:11:40,830 --> 01:11:44,832 Garcon, bring out the fucking raspberry brown butter torte 1410 01:11:44,834 --> 01:11:48,336 that reads "Happy 23rd B-Day, Turbeaux! 1411 01:11:48,338 --> 01:11:50,838 Love your lying friend, 1412 01:11:50,840 --> 01:11:53,408 the sack of shit that he is, Brent!" 1413 01:11:53,410 --> 01:11:56,010 -I swear, I will ruin every surprise party 1414 01:11:56,012 --> 01:11:58,313 that anyone ever throws you! 1415 01:11:58,315 --> 01:11:59,514 -But I love surprises! 1416 01:11:59,516 --> 01:12:00,782 -What's your problem, man?! 1417 01:12:00,784 --> 01:12:03,384 -I have a hairy dick! 1418 01:12:08,724 --> 01:12:09,857 -Wh-what? 1419 01:12:12,328 --> 01:12:15,330 -You know how I hate little baby dogs 1420 01:12:15,332 --> 01:12:17,699 and their little hairy baby dog dicks? 1421 01:12:17,701 --> 01:12:19,100 -Yeah, I guess, yeah. 1422 01:12:19,102 --> 01:12:22,637 -When I look at a little baby dog, Brent... 1423 01:12:22,639 --> 01:12:25,707 I see the parts of me that I hate! 1424 01:12:25,709 --> 01:12:29,077 I hate my little hairy baby dog dick! 1425 01:12:30,346 --> 01:12:31,879 -That's cool, man. 1426 01:12:31,881 --> 01:12:34,782 That's...That's normal... 1427 01:12:34,784 --> 01:12:38,886 for us...to have...problems... 1428 01:12:38,888 --> 01:12:42,790 with our -- with our dicks. 1429 01:12:42,792 --> 01:12:43,958 -Really? 1430 01:12:43,960 --> 01:12:47,128 -Sure. 1431 01:12:47,130 --> 01:12:48,863 -All right. 1432 01:12:48,865 --> 01:12:49,864 All right. 1433 01:12:49,866 --> 01:12:52,667 Well, me and my fuzz rod, 1434 01:12:52,669 --> 01:12:54,502 we're gonna... 1435 01:12:54,504 --> 01:12:58,873 go down to the cellar and...get some more wood. 1436 01:13:00,876 --> 01:13:03,010 All right. Good talk. 1437 01:13:11,887 --> 01:13:13,421 -What? 1438 01:13:13,423 --> 01:13:15,923 Who's been pillaging my veg stash?! 1439 01:13:18,161 --> 01:13:19,794 What am I gonna eat? 1440 01:13:37,012 --> 01:13:40,815 Aww. You're just hungry. That's cool. 1441 01:13:40,817 --> 01:13:43,684 What's mine is yours, rabbit friend. 1442 01:13:51,927 --> 01:13:53,561 No, I can't! I'm a vegetarian! 1443 01:13:53,563 --> 01:13:54,762 Meat upsets my stom-- 1444 01:13:59,701 --> 01:14:04,038 Oh, n-o-o-o-o! 1445 01:14:35,904 --> 01:14:37,939 -All right! 1446 01:14:44,947 --> 01:14:48,649 One bullet? Cool. 1447 01:14:50,085 --> 01:14:51,185 Oh! 1448 01:14:57,159 --> 01:14:59,093 I'm not afraid of you. 1449 01:15:14,610 --> 01:15:17,211 Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! 1450 01:15:17,213 --> 01:15:18,746 I'm a puppet! 1451 01:15:18,748 --> 01:15:20,648 Aah! 1452 01:15:20,650 --> 01:15:21,649 Oh, my God! 1453 01:15:21,651 --> 01:15:22,850 Ohh! Ohh! 1454 01:15:22,852 --> 01:15:25,553 I hate my little hairy baby dog dick! 1455 01:15:25,555 --> 01:15:27,755 I have a hairy dick! 1456 01:15:27,757 --> 01:15:29,790 Baby hairy dick! 1457 01:15:29,792 --> 01:15:33,094 I hate my little hairy baby dog dick! 1458 01:15:33,096 --> 01:15:35,563 I have a hairy dick! 1459 01:15:42,138 --> 01:15:43,871 You're so small! 1460 01:15:46,009 --> 01:15:47,708 -What was that? -Turbeaux's dead. 1461 01:15:47,710 --> 01:15:49,277 -And Sizzler? 1462 01:15:49,279 --> 01:15:51,579 -Honestly, I forgot who Sizzler was, 1463 01:15:51,581 --> 01:15:54,282 but I should play it cool. 1464 01:15:54,284 --> 01:15:56,551 Let's split up and look for him. 1465 01:16:00,789 --> 01:16:02,690 -Sizzler? 1466 01:16:02,692 --> 01:16:04,325 -Sizzler? 1467 01:16:08,163 --> 01:16:09,664 -Sizzler? 1468 01:16:09,666 --> 01:16:11,933 -Sizzler? 1469 01:16:15,103 --> 01:16:17,305 -Sizzler? 1470 01:16:17,307 --> 01:16:19,206 -Sizzler? 1471 01:16:19,208 --> 01:16:21,108 Sizzler? 1472 01:16:24,980 --> 01:16:26,080 -Sizzler? 1473 01:16:27,583 --> 01:16:29,850 -Sizzler? 1474 01:16:29,852 --> 01:16:32,353 Oh! Sizzler?! 1475 01:16:36,224 --> 01:16:37,792 -Sizzler? 1476 01:16:39,861 --> 01:16:42,129 Sizzler? 1477 01:16:42,131 --> 01:16:44,065 Sizzler? 1478 01:16:44,067 --> 01:16:47,068 -Relzzis? 1479 01:16:48,236 --> 01:16:50,371 -Relzzis? 1480 01:16:50,373 --> 01:16:52,740 -Sizzler? 1481 01:16:52,742 --> 01:16:54,675 -Relzzis? 1482 01:16:54,677 --> 01:16:56,177 Relzzis? 1483 01:16:56,179 --> 01:16:58,012 Sizzler? 1484 01:16:58,014 --> 01:16:59,046 Relzzis? 1485 01:16:59,381 --> 01:17:01,382 Relzzis? 1486 01:17:01,384 --> 01:17:03,684 -Sizzler? 1487 01:17:04,686 --> 01:17:06,621 -Sizzler? 1488 01:17:11,227 --> 01:17:13,961 Oh, my God! Oh, God! 1489 01:17:17,833 --> 01:17:19,734 -Whoa, Sizzler? 1490 01:17:20,736 --> 01:17:22,703 Shit. 1491 01:17:22,705 --> 01:17:26,073 Looks like it's just the two of us. 1492 01:17:26,075 --> 01:17:28,909 -No. 1493 01:17:28,911 --> 01:17:30,811 There's a third. 1494 01:17:34,983 --> 01:17:37,652 -T-O-Double-D? -Mm-hmm. 1495 01:17:38,654 --> 01:17:40,054 -It's the last Delta Bi. 1496 01:17:51,934 --> 01:17:54,435 -We have Steve Guttenberg here in the studio 1497 01:17:54,437 --> 01:17:56,070 to talk to us about his upcoming movie, 1498 01:17:56,072 --> 01:17:59,040 "3 Men and a Baby." -Can't wait! 1499 01:17:59,042 --> 01:18:00,408 See you after the late-night morning movie. 1500 01:18:00,410 --> 01:18:02,710 -Stay tuned! -Sizzler? 1501 01:18:03,980 --> 01:18:06,847 Oh, God! Todd Jr., no! 1502 01:18:06,849 --> 01:18:10,117 Fetus! 1503 01:18:10,119 --> 01:18:11,686 -I wish you'd be more positive. 1504 01:18:11,688 --> 01:18:13,688 -I've had a bad day. -Oh, no. 1505 01:18:13,690 --> 01:18:15,089 Motherface got you guys, too. 1506 01:18:15,091 --> 01:18:16,691 -Oh, you don't care. 1507 01:18:16,693 --> 01:18:18,392 You don't even know our names. 1508 01:18:18,394 --> 01:18:20,227 -Yea-- yeah, I do. 1509 01:18:20,229 --> 01:18:21,829 -Name us. 1510 01:18:21,831 --> 01:18:23,731 -Todd -- no. Turtleneck. 1511 01:18:23,733 --> 01:18:26,300 Turtleneck bro... 1512 01:18:26,302 --> 01:18:28,836 Flannel bro. 1513 01:18:28,838 --> 01:18:30,137 -Lucky guess. 1514 01:18:30,139 --> 01:18:32,273 Only 'cause we're named after our shirts. 1515 01:18:32,275 --> 01:18:35,176 Can you even name one good time we've had together? 1516 01:18:35,178 --> 01:18:37,078 -Yeah! 1517 01:18:40,849 --> 01:18:43,117 -No. 1518 01:18:47,190 --> 01:18:49,023 Aah! Ohh! 1519 01:18:49,025 --> 01:18:50,791 Ohh, ohh! 1520 01:18:52,761 --> 01:18:54,295 -You're alone, Brent. 1521 01:18:54,297 --> 01:18:55,963 You never avenged your brother. 1522 01:18:55,965 --> 01:18:57,798 You never solved your mystery. 1523 01:18:57,800 --> 01:18:59,934 -Oh, you're wrong. 1524 01:18:59,936 --> 01:19:05,372 I'm ready to avenge my brother because I solved my mystery. 1525 01:19:05,374 --> 01:19:08,776 I know who you are, Motherface. 1526 01:19:08,778 --> 01:19:11,045 You're Ronald Reagan. 1527 01:19:15,083 --> 01:19:16,150 -No -- no, I'm not. 1528 01:19:16,152 --> 01:19:17,985 -Think about it, Mr. President. 1529 01:19:17,987 --> 01:19:21,388 The Dude Bros freshman-year prank deposed General Cortez. 1530 01:19:21,390 --> 01:19:24,425 -Your heavy-metal hot-air balloon did drive General Cortez 1531 01:19:24,427 --> 01:19:25,893 from the Brazilian embassy. 1532 01:19:25,895 --> 01:19:28,262 -So you could install a puppet dictator 1533 01:19:28,264 --> 01:19:30,431 and turn the tide in Central America. 1534 01:19:30,433 --> 01:19:34,235 Oh, with their powerful pecs and extreme athleticism, 1535 01:19:34,237 --> 01:19:38,405 the Delta Bis were you personal Delta Force. 1536 01:19:41,309 --> 01:19:43,110 -This is ridiculous. -Sophomore year, 1537 01:19:43,112 --> 01:19:44,445 they sold arms to Iran, 1538 01:19:44,447 --> 01:19:47,181 but that went south, didn't it, Ronnie? 1539 01:19:47,183 --> 01:19:50,317 So you decommissioned them to a frat house in East Chico. 1540 01:19:50,319 --> 01:19:52,019 How convenient. 1541 01:19:52,021 --> 01:19:54,321 Oh, except you forgot about one thing. 1542 01:19:54,323 --> 01:19:56,891 You can't turn off training like that, can you? 1543 01:19:56,893 --> 01:19:58,893 No. Not like a light switch. 1544 01:19:58,895 --> 01:20:00,895 -Part of me did die that day. 1545 01:20:00,897 --> 01:20:03,931 -So, two days ago, when they brought down two planes, 1546 01:20:03,933 --> 01:20:07,301 you got a sex change, you appointed an imposter 1547 01:20:07,303 --> 01:20:09,236 to take your place in D.C., 1548 01:20:09,238 --> 01:20:14,074 and donned the face of Chico's most notorious killer. 1549 01:20:14,076 --> 01:20:16,944 Admit it, Motherface. 1550 01:20:16,946 --> 01:20:21,048 You are our nation's 40th president. 1551 01:20:25,053 --> 01:20:26,587 -Damn it, Brent. 1552 01:20:26,589 --> 01:20:28,856 How did you know? 1553 01:20:28,858 --> 01:20:30,591 -I solved it! 1554 01:20:34,196 --> 01:20:35,896 Oh, damn it! 1555 01:20:35,898 --> 01:20:38,065 I really thought I had that one! 1556 01:20:38,067 --> 01:20:40,034 Oh! 1557 01:20:40,036 --> 01:20:42,403 I'm ready to avenge my brother, Motherface, 1558 01:20:42,405 --> 01:20:44,205 because I know who you are. 1559 01:20:44,207 --> 01:20:46,106 -Did you know about his worst fear? 1560 01:20:46,108 --> 01:20:47,842 -Running out of beer? 1561 01:20:47,844 --> 01:20:50,244 -You knew all kinds of personal information about us. 1562 01:20:50,246 --> 01:20:52,079 -No babies! My seed! 1563 01:20:52,081 --> 01:20:53,180 Aaah! 1564 01:20:53,182 --> 01:20:54,548 -My fear is beef! 1565 01:20:54,550 --> 01:20:57,585 And pork and chicken and all that gross stuff! 1566 01:20:57,587 --> 01:21:00,120 -I told you -- I hate handyman work. 1567 01:21:00,122 --> 01:21:01,522 Aaah! 1568 01:21:01,524 --> 01:21:03,257 -Z.Q.'s overcome his fear of heights! 1569 01:21:03,259 --> 01:21:04,225 -Wow! -We never established 1570 01:21:04,227 --> 01:21:05,593 he was afraid of heights. 1571 01:21:05,595 --> 01:21:07,061 -Eh, who cares? This whole thing's a mess. 1572 01:21:07,063 --> 01:21:09,063 -This is fucking stupid. -Guys... 1573 01:21:09,065 --> 01:21:12,299 And that's because you're Turbeaux -- 1574 01:21:12,301 --> 01:21:14,101 the school therapist! 1575 01:21:14,103 --> 01:21:15,436 Ow! Why?! 1576 01:21:15,438 --> 01:21:17,238 -Why? 1577 01:21:17,240 --> 01:21:20,241 Haven't you been investigating any of this shit?! 1578 01:21:20,243 --> 01:21:24,311 Your brother murdered my mom and my twin sister! 1579 01:21:24,913 --> 01:21:28,449 I swore that the reign of terror of your kind was over. 1580 01:21:28,451 --> 01:21:29,917 I swore that I would find 1581 01:21:29,919 --> 01:21:32,286 the Delta Bis deepest, darkest fears, 1582 01:21:32,288 --> 01:21:34,154 starting with your brothers, 1583 01:21:34,156 --> 01:21:36,156 and use it to slaughter them! 1584 01:21:36,158 --> 01:21:40,294 -Hey, my brother was -- -Oh, shut the fuck up. 1585 01:21:40,296 --> 01:21:42,196 I was their therapist! 1586 01:21:42,198 --> 01:21:45,032 Oh, the things these guys told me. 1587 01:21:45,034 --> 01:21:46,934 Did you know that, two months ago, 1588 01:21:46,936 --> 01:21:49,069 Derek hit a 9-year-old with his car 1589 01:21:49,071 --> 01:21:52,039 and then buried her under the football field, huh? 1590 01:21:52,041 --> 01:21:56,277 And Samzy put Coca-Cola and Pop Rocks in the fuselage 1591 01:21:56,279 --> 01:21:58,979 of the Challenger shuttle as a goof! 1592 01:21:58,981 --> 01:22:02,616 -Hey, what about patient-doctor confidentiality? 1593 01:22:02,618 --> 01:22:05,152 -Oh, the sense of entitlement on these bros! 1594 01:22:05,154 --> 01:22:07,554 -Tai chi! 1595 01:22:09,057 --> 01:22:11,358 -Why did you join their ranks, Brent? 1596 01:22:11,360 --> 01:22:15,362 You could've ended this cycle of meaningless destruction. 1597 01:22:15,364 --> 01:22:17,932 -I just wanted to have the feeling of... 1598 01:22:17,934 --> 01:22:20,067 brotherhood again. 1599 01:22:20,069 --> 01:22:22,436 I...I had a good time. 1600 01:22:22,438 --> 01:22:25,072 -Oh, fuck you! 1601 01:22:25,074 --> 01:22:26,640 What about sisterhood?! 1602 01:22:26,642 --> 01:22:28,676 My sister was my best friend. 1603 01:22:28,678 --> 01:22:32,146 None of you motherfuckers have any sense of goddamn empathy. 1604 01:22:32,148 --> 01:22:35,149 They crashed a plane into an orphanage. 1605 01:22:35,151 --> 01:22:37,084 An orphanage! 1606 01:22:38,521 --> 01:22:41,488 -Well, I was behind the planes, not them. 1607 01:22:42,624 --> 01:22:44,591 -You are just like Brock. 1608 01:22:47,462 --> 01:22:48,696 Do you know why your brother 1609 01:22:48,698 --> 01:22:51,298 went to a different college than you? 1610 01:22:51,300 --> 01:22:53,167 -East Chico U. has an urban-development major. 1611 01:22:53,169 --> 01:22:55,169 He wanted to be a city planner. 1612 01:22:55,171 --> 01:22:58,038 -He told me he needed space. 1613 01:22:59,140 --> 01:23:06,246 -N-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o! 1614 01:23:06,248 --> 01:23:09,149 -Not so motherfucking fast, Motherface! 1615 01:23:10,385 --> 01:23:13,087 -Nedry?! -That's fucking right, bitch! 1616 01:23:13,089 --> 01:23:15,723 -You're doing it, Nedry! You're swearing! 1617 01:23:15,725 --> 01:23:17,257 -Looks like I fucking 1618 01:23:17,259 --> 01:23:19,426 handicapped your advantage, Motherface. 1619 01:23:19,428 --> 01:23:22,062 See, I've gained mastery over all these animals! 1620 01:23:22,064 --> 01:23:23,430 Look at my beasts! 1621 01:23:23,432 --> 01:23:25,599 I've forgiven the wolves that slayed my family 1622 01:23:25,601 --> 01:23:27,134 and become their leader. 1623 01:23:27,136 --> 01:23:29,036 You want to see some cold-ass shit? 1624 01:23:29,038 --> 01:23:30,637 Ca-caw! 1625 01:23:34,009 --> 01:23:36,010 This here is a motherfucking bald eagle, 1626 01:23:36,012 --> 01:23:37,611 the most majestic creature in America, 1627 01:23:37,613 --> 01:23:40,314 and I made him my bitch! 1628 01:23:40,316 --> 01:23:43,283 And it's about to motherfuck your face, Motherface! 1629 01:23:43,285 --> 01:23:46,653 Because you know, birds of a feather, flock -- 1630 01:23:46,655 --> 01:23:48,789 together. 1631 01:24:01,369 --> 01:24:03,470 -Whoa! 1632 01:24:03,472 --> 01:24:04,605 Tai ch-- 1633 01:24:07,510 --> 01:24:09,109 -What's the matter? 1634 01:24:09,111 --> 01:24:10,511 All choked up? 1635 01:24:26,462 --> 01:24:29,163 Use her inertia against her. 1636 01:24:35,470 --> 01:24:37,204 -Is it really you? 1637 01:24:37,206 --> 01:24:38,639 -It's really me. 1638 01:24:38,641 --> 01:24:40,407 It's Brock. 1639 01:24:40,409 --> 01:24:41,642 -Weird. 1640 01:24:41,644 --> 01:24:44,478 I...thought you needed space. 1641 01:24:44,480 --> 01:24:47,681 -Hey. We've had our space. 1642 01:24:47,683 --> 01:24:49,583 And we'll never need space again, 1643 01:24:49,585 --> 01:24:52,386 because I'll always be with you... 1644 01:24:52,388 --> 01:24:54,855 within you. 1645 01:24:54,857 --> 01:24:57,124 Yeah. You'll see. 1646 01:25:01,397 --> 01:25:04,098 Oh, crumbles! 1647 01:25:05,434 --> 01:25:08,168 Virgin sacrifice. Oh! 1648 01:25:12,373 --> 01:25:15,509 Oh, if only I was a roly-poly bag of oranges! 1649 01:25:15,511 --> 01:25:17,244 I'd bop myself on the nose 1650 01:25:17,246 --> 01:25:20,380 and tumble and fumble right out of this tender trap. 1651 01:25:20,382 --> 01:25:21,782 -Sminkle, it's me. 1652 01:25:21,784 --> 01:25:24,651 Let's get you out of here. 1653 01:25:24,653 --> 01:25:28,122 -You lied to me. 1654 01:25:28,124 --> 01:25:30,524 You all lied to me. 1655 01:25:30,526 --> 01:25:33,660 And the Dude Bros aren't really bags of oranges, are they? 1656 01:25:33,662 --> 01:25:35,762 And every moment we spent in my bang bus 1657 01:25:35,764 --> 01:25:37,831 meant nothing, did it. 1658 01:25:37,833 --> 01:25:39,533 Well, fine, Candace. 1659 01:25:39,535 --> 01:25:41,335 If dying a virgin is the only way 1660 01:25:41,337 --> 01:25:43,537 I can save my beloved Chico, 1661 01:25:43,539 --> 01:25:46,540 then I guess that's all I'm good for. 1662 01:25:48,676 --> 01:25:50,811 -Not if I can help it. 1663 01:25:50,813 --> 01:25:52,679 -What are you doing? 1664 01:25:52,681 --> 01:25:54,414 -Saving your life. 1665 01:25:56,451 --> 01:25:59,386 -She's too powerful, Brock. I let you down. 1666 01:25:59,388 --> 01:26:01,922 -Hey, remember what I always say -- 1667 01:26:01,924 --> 01:26:04,892 if you face a foe you're afraid you can't defeat, 1668 01:26:04,894 --> 01:26:06,760 you got to let your bros in. 1669 01:26:06,762 --> 01:26:07,861 Let us in, Brent. 1670 01:26:07,863 --> 01:26:10,430 Let us all...in. 1671 01:26:15,603 --> 01:26:20,574 All along, Brent, you just needed to let you bros in. 1672 01:26:23,578 --> 01:26:25,179 -I'm ready. 1673 01:26:27,615 --> 01:26:32,219 Bros, enter me! 1674 01:26:32,221 --> 01:26:33,754 Oh! 1675 01:26:34,689 --> 01:26:36,723 Oh! 1676 01:26:36,725 --> 01:26:37,858 Oh-ho-ho! 1677 01:26:38,259 --> 01:26:40,561 Unh! -You're doing it. 1678 01:26:48,369 --> 01:26:49,770 -Oh! 1679 01:26:49,772 --> 01:26:51,438 Oh-ho-ho! 1680 01:26:51,440 --> 01:26:53,674 Unh! 1681 01:26:53,676 --> 01:26:55,242 Oh! 1682 01:26:55,244 --> 01:26:57,878 -Whoa! We're not virgin anymore. 1683 01:26:57,880 --> 01:27:01,348 I feel so free! 1684 01:27:01,350 --> 01:27:01,982 -Ah! 1685 01:27:01,984 --> 01:27:03,517 Oh! 1686 01:27:36,484 --> 01:27:40,020 -I'll always be with you, Brent.... 1687 01:27:40,022 --> 01:27:44,925 inside your butt giving you powers. 1688 01:27:44,927 --> 01:27:46,827 -Bye-bye. 1689 01:27:58,840 --> 01:28:02,809 -And that's the number 1 reason why Candace and I are in love. 1690 01:28:02,811 --> 01:28:04,544 -You fool! 1691 01:28:04,546 --> 01:28:07,914 You had one simple destiny, Sminkle -- 1692 01:28:07,916 --> 01:28:09,349 to stop the Dude Bros, 1693 01:28:09,351 --> 01:28:11,051 and you balls'd it up! 1694 01:28:11,053 --> 01:28:13,387 Do you have any idea 1695 01:28:13,389 --> 01:28:18,058 how much work and taxpayer money went into this?! 1696 01:28:18,060 --> 01:28:20,460 I learned Latin. 1697 01:28:20,462 --> 01:28:22,562 And making all those blood candles? 1698 01:28:22,564 --> 01:28:26,366 Jesus, I -- I killed so many ducks. 1699 01:28:26,368 --> 01:28:31,405 And Debra... made a lovely cake. 1700 01:28:31,407 --> 01:28:35,409 I ate a goddamn nicoise salad 1701 01:28:35,411 --> 01:28:38,011 to make room for this cocksucker, 1702 01:28:38,013 --> 01:28:40,447 and now I can't even look at it! 1703 01:28:42,618 --> 01:28:45,652 And you -- you said I could trust you! 1704 01:28:45,654 --> 01:28:48,088 And you fall in love with him?! 1705 01:28:48,090 --> 01:28:49,756 -Chief, you got a call 1706 01:28:49,758 --> 01:28:54,027 from the Imperial Dark Majesty on line 1. 1707 01:28:54,029 --> 01:28:59,933 -That's, uh -- that's Eric, and I have to take this. 1708 01:29:05,473 --> 01:29:07,007 -Well, we did it, Candy! 1709 01:29:07,009 --> 01:29:09,509 And all because you taught me to believe in myself. 1710 01:29:09,511 --> 01:29:11,411 -Well, I don't want to take all the credit. 1711 01:29:11,413 --> 01:29:14,514 I mean, you did teach me a thing or two, as well. 1712 01:29:14,516 --> 01:29:17,017 -Hey, I got a silly, crazy, little old idea. 1713 01:29:17,019 --> 01:29:18,885 What say you and me become a boyfriend-girlfriend 1714 01:29:18,887 --> 01:29:22,522 mystery-solving team, banging kids on the side? 1715 01:29:22,524 --> 01:29:25,025 I already know what our first case will be -- 1716 01:29:25,027 --> 01:29:28,362 the Chico County Orange Crisis. 1717 01:29:28,364 --> 01:29:31,832 -About that, I already cracked the case. 1718 01:29:31,834 --> 01:29:35,869 -Wow. That was fucking fast. 1719 01:29:35,871 --> 01:29:39,639 Where are your clues, partner? 1720 01:29:39,641 --> 01:29:41,875 -I'm a bag of oranges. 1721 01:29:47,682 --> 01:29:48,782 -What? 1722 01:29:48,784 --> 01:29:52,652 -I'm a bag of oranges. 1723 01:29:52,654 --> 01:29:54,788 -That's not a clue. That's not a clue. 1724 01:29:54,790 --> 01:29:55,922 -Search your feelings. 1725 01:29:55,924 --> 01:29:58,792 You know it to be true. 1726 01:29:58,794 --> 01:30:01,895 -Bag of oranges, get in here! 1727 01:30:01,897 --> 01:30:04,598 -Top 10 reasons magic isn't real. 1728 01:30:04,600 --> 01:30:06,800 Number 10, I have prayed to a genie 1729 01:30:06,802 --> 01:30:08,835 to take me away from my abusive home life, 1730 01:30:08,837 --> 01:30:10,737 and it never showed up. 1731 01:30:10,739 --> 01:30:12,773 Candace, please, no! 1732 01:30:12,775 --> 01:30:16,510 Ew! Oh, gosh! 1733 01:30:16,512 --> 01:30:18,011 But I love you! 1734 01:30:18,013 --> 01:30:19,980 -If you love me, you know what you have to do. 1735 01:30:19,982 --> 01:30:22,549 -I do. 1736 01:30:22,551 --> 01:30:25,652 -Look, he's talking to that bag of oranges again. 1737 01:30:25,654 --> 01:30:27,654 -Do it. Save Chico. 1738 01:30:30,091 --> 01:30:31,725 -I will always... 1739 01:30:31,727 --> 01:30:33,460 love you. 1740 01:30:39,133 --> 01:30:41,868 N-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o! 1741 01:30:41,870 --> 01:30:43,637 -I don't want to call things too early, 1742 01:30:43,639 --> 01:30:45,038 but up here in the sky, 1743 01:30:45,040 --> 01:30:46,807 it looks like Chico's orange crisis 1744 01:30:46,809 --> 01:30:48,475 might be solved. 1745 01:33:20,027 --> 01:33:21,995 -Whoo! 1746 01:41:44,698 --> 01:41:46,332 -Hi, my baby! 1747 01:41:46,334 --> 01:41:48,568 -Sizzler?! -My baby! 1748 01:41:48,570 --> 01:41:51,104 -Sizzler? 135649