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{\an2}[ominous music playing]
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{\an2}[Batman] Black.
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{\an2}All important movies startwith a black screen.
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{\an2}And music.
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{\an2}Edgy, scary music
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{\an2}that would makea parent or studio executive nervous.
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{\an2}And logos.
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{\an2}Really long and dramatic logos.
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{\an8}Warner Bros.
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{\an8}Why not "Warner Brothers?"I don't know.
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{\an2}[thunder rumbling]
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{\an2}DC.
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{\an2}The house that Batman built.
14
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{\an2}Yeah, what, Superman?
15
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{\an2}Come at me, bro.
16
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{\an2}I'm your Kryptonite.
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{\an2}Hmm.
18
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{\an8}Not sure what RatPac does,but that logo is macho.
19
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{\an8}I dig it.
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{\an2}Okay.
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{\an2}Get yourself ready for some
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{\an2}reading.
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{\an2}"If you want to make the worlda better place
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{\an2}take a look at yourselfand make a change.
25
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{\an2}"Hooo."
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{\an2}No. I said that.
27
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{\an2}Batman is very wise.
28
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{\an2}I also have huge pecsand a nine-pack.
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{\an8}Yeah, I've got an extra ab.
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{\an2}Now, let's start the movie.
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{\an2}[Bill] Gotham Tower,this is McGuffin Airlines, Flight 1138.
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{\an2}We are transporting11 million sticks of dynamite,
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{\an2}17,000 pounds of C-4,
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{\an2}about 150 cute littleclassic bomb-type bombs,
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{\an2}and two best friends!
36
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{\an2}And request permission to fly overthe most crime-ridden city in the world.
37
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{\an2}Over.
38
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{\an2}I'm just looking at all the guys' faces
here in the control tower.
39
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{\an2}-I'm good.
-Sounds good to me.
40
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{\an2}-Do it!
-Yeah, as long as they're best friends.
41
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{\an2}-Thumbs up!
-Yep, I think we're cool with that.
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{\an2}[dramatic music playing]
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{\an2}[lead criminal] Gentlemen,
44
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{\an2}seal breach in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1!
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{\an2}What was that?
46
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{\an2}-One of us should check it out.
-Okay.
47
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{\an2}[both] Scissors, paper, rock.
48
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{\an2}-Paper.
-Scissors.
49
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{\an2}Ha! You always do paper.
50
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{\an2}I'm a loser at home
and a loser at work.
51
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{\an2}Holy cow!
52
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{\an2}[screams]
53
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{\an2}[muzak playing]
54
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{\an2}Captain Dale, is everything okay?
55
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{\an2}[lead criminal] I am afraid
Captain Dale had to bail.
56
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{\an2}I'm your new co-pilot.
57
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{\an2}And I always come to work
58
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{\an2}with a smile!
59
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{\an2}-You should be terrified.
-Why?
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{\an2}Because I will be taking over the city.
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{\an2}Mmm...
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{\an2}-What?
-Batman will stop you.
63
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{\an2}-[blows raspberry]
-He always stops you.
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{\an2}No, he doesn't.
65
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{\an2}What about that time with the two boats?
66
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{\an2}This is better than the two boats.
67
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{\an2}-Mmm...
-Well, tonight is gonna be different!
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{\an2}Tonight is my greatest plan yet.
69
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{\an8}And trust me,Batman's never gonna see it coming.
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{\an8}[Bill] Like that time with the paradeand the Prince music?
71
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{\an8}[Joker] Hey, quiet!
72
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{\an8}-Good night, Steve.
-Take it easy, Jeff.
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{\an8}Man, I really like that guy.
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{\an8}I sure hope nothing bad happens to him.
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{\an2}[Jeff whistling]
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{\an2}[singing]
Nothing bad ever happens to me
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{\an2}What the...
78
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{\an2}[Joker] Your city is under attack
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{\an2}by Gotham's greatest criminal minds.
80
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{\an2}Including
81
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{\an2}-The Riddler.
-[laughing]
82
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{\an2}Scarecrow.
83
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{\an2}Pizza delivery.
84
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{\an2}[groans]
85
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{\an2}-Bane.
-Hello.
86
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{\an2}Two-Face!
87
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{\an2}We need that door open, baby!
88
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{\an2}Catwoman.
89
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{\an2}Meow, meow. You're in! Meow, meow.
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{\an2}[security guard]
I'm jumping out of the way!
91
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{\an2}[honking]
92
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{\an2}[Joker] And let's not forget, Clayface.
93
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{\an2}[roaring]
94
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{\an2}[imitating guns firing]
95
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{\an2}-Poison Ivy.
-[imitates guns firing]
96
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{\an2}-Freeze!
-[Mr. Freeze] No!
97
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{\an2}You freeze!
98
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{\an2}[Joker] Mr. Freeze!
99
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{\an2}Penguin, Crazy Quilt, Eraser.
100
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{\an2}Polka-Dot Man, Mime, Tarantula.
101
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{\an2}King Tut, Orca, Killer Moth,
102
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{\an2}March Harriet, Zodiac Master,Gentleman Ghost.
103
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{\an2}Clock King, Calendar Man, Kite-Man,Catman, Zebra-Man, and the Condiment King.
104
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{\an2}Okay, are you making some of those up?
105
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{\an2}Nope, they're all real.
106
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{\an8}Probably worth a Google.
107
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{\an2}-Hey, watch it!
-Commissioner Gordon!
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{\an2}What is it, O'Hara?
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{\an2}We just got a report!
110
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{\an2}All the Z-grade villains have
broken into the energy plant!
111
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{\an2}What are we gonna do, sir?
112
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{\an2}The only thing we ever do.
Flip the switch to the Bat-Signal!
113
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{\an2}Flip!
114
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{\an2}[officer on radio]
Commissioner, are you there?
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{\an2}The Bat-Signal, she's been egged!
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{\an2}-[giggling]
-[O'Hara] It's Egghead, sir.
117
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{\an2}I'm well aware of his work.
118
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{\an2}Dear gosh.
You've destroyed the Bat-Signal.
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{\an2}You have thought of everything.
120
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{\an2}Yeah, I know!
121
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{\an2}And when I take over Gotham City...
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{\an2}[energy plant computer]
Opening reactor core doors.
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{\an2}[Joker] Batman will grovel at the feet
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{\an2}of his greatest enemy!
125
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{\an2}Me! The Joker!
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{\an2}[laughs]
127
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{\an2}Joker, do you read me?
128
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{\an2}10-4, girl buddy.
129
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{\an2}We're ready for you, sugar plum.
130
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{\an2}Well, then, let's raise the roof!
131
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{\an2}[Bane] Fire in the hole!
132
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{\an2}[sirens wailing]
133
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{\an2}O'Hara, have you tried the Bat-Phone?
134
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{\an2}Yes, but all I'm getting
is this hold music.
135
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{\an2}[dramatic music playing]
136
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{\an2}I love it.
137
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{\an2}[tires screeching]
138
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{\an2}-I want snipers trained on that building!
-You bet!
139
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{\an2}-I want water and air support, yesterday!
-Ahoy, sir!
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{\an2}And I need SWAT here now!
141
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{\an2}[officer] Phone call
for Commissioner Gordon.
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{\an2}Hello? Batman?
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{\an2}Hi, Jimmy! It's the Jokes. Oop!
144
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{\an2}Nobody calls you that.
145
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{\an2}[scoffs] Yes, people do call me that.
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{\an2}Okay, listen up.
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{\an2}[all] Go, go, go!
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{\an2}[Joker] At this very moment,an unnecessarily complicated bomb
149
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{\an2}is being attachedto the inside of the main energy core.
150
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{\an2}If the mayor isn't here in five minutes
to negotiate the city's surrender,
151
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{\an2}then I shall destroy Gotham City.
152
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{\an2}I did something!
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{\an2}[Pippa] Doctor, that sounds frighteningand overly complicated.
154
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{\an8}Talk us through it.
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{\an8}Well, I don't wanna scareany small children who may be listening,
156
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{\an2}but it's a little-known factthat Gotham City
157
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{\an2}is built on a bunch of flimsy platesstuck together.
158
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{\an2}There's literally nothing beneath us,
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{\an2}except an infinite abyssthat smells like dirty underwear.
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{\an2}If Joker's bomb were to go off,
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{\an2}these plates would break apart,
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{\an2}plunging every Gotham citizen
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{\an8}into the eternal abyss forever.
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{\an2}[Joker] And you wouldn't want that,now would you?
165
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{\an2}Now get me the mayor! Joker out!
166
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{\an2}Madam Mayor,
I cannot ask you to do this!
167
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{\an2}-Jim, did you find Batman?
-No, ma'am.
168
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{\an2}Then we have no choice.
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{\an2}The Joker has the upper hand.
We have to surrender Gotham City.
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{\an2}[Gordon] Oh, no.
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{\an2}I'm sorry!
172
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{\an2}[pilot] Flying the mayorpackage in right now.
173
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{\an2}[SWAT leader] SWAT team,get your stun guns ready!
174
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{\an2}-Non-lethal.
-[both] Yeah!
175
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{\an2}[pilot] Loweringmayor package through hole.
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{\an2}[Joker] Madam Mayor!
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{\an2}Thanks for dropping by.
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{\an2}[scoffs] I've only got one thing
to say to you, Joker.
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{\an2}Well, you better make it fast.
180
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{\an2}Do you like to gamble?
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{\an2}Oh, I certainly do.
182
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{\an2}Do you ever play roulette?
183
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{\an2}On occasion.
184
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{\an2}Well, let me give you a word of advice.
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{\an2}I'm all ears.
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{\an2}When playing roulette...
187
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{\an2}Yes?
188
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{\an2}Always bet on black.
189
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{\an2}Batman?
190
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{\an2}What are you doing?
You're completely outnumbered here!
191
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{\an2}Are you nuts?
192
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{\an2}You wanna get nuts? Come on!
193
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{\an2}Let's get nuts!
194
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{\an2}'Cause I just wrote a song
about how I'm gonna kick all your butts!
195
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{\an2}Stop him before he starts singing!
196
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{\an2}[heavy metal music playing]
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{\an2}[singing] Yeah!
198
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{\an2}In the darkest night
199
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{\an2}I make the bad guys fall
200
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{\an2}There's a million heroes
201
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{\an2}Computer, overcompensate.
202
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{\an2}But I'm the best of them all
203
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{\an2}[Puter] I'm on my way, sir.
204
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{\an2}-Who has the coolest gadgets?-Batman!
205
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{\an2}-Who has the tricked-out ride?-Batman!
206
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{\an2}-Who does the sickest backflips?-Batman!
207
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{\an2}Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, naBatman!
208
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{\an2}Yeah, hey, hey!Batman jam!
209
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{\an2}Da-na, da-na, da-na, da-na
210
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{\an2}Batman!
211
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{\an2}You think my muscles are big?
212
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{\an2}Thank you.
213
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{\an2}You haven't seen my brain
214
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{\an2}Ladies, it's okay if you stare
215
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{\an2}Why?
216
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{\an2}'Cause I'm a billionaire
217
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{\an2}Get it together, guys!
218
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{\an2}You're making me look bad
in front of Batman!
219
00:08:55,910 --> 00:08:56,953
{\an2}'Puter, where's the bomb?
220
00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:59,998
{\an2}[Puter] The bomb is locatedat the base of the energy core.
221
00:09:00,915 --> 00:09:01,958
{\an2}What the...
222
00:09:02,125 --> 00:09:04,085
{\an2}I get the last laughI get the final grin
223
00:09:04,419 --> 00:09:07,505
{\an2}Throw you into the asylumWith Harley Quinn
224
00:09:07,672 --> 00:09:10,467
{\an2}Turn Two-FaceTo black-and-blue face
225
00:09:10,717 --> 00:09:13,511
{\an2}I 100% am not Bruce Wayne!
226
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{\an2}Kiss me, Batman.
227
00:09:16,473 --> 00:09:18,224
{\an2}-Who's the manliest man?
-Ugh!
228
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{\an2}Batman!
229
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{\an2}-With the buns of steel?-Batman!
230
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{\an2}'Puter.
231
00:09:22,645 --> 00:09:25,231
{\an2}-Who could choke-hold a bear?-Batman!
232
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{\an2}-Who never skips leg day?-Batman!
233
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{\an2}Who always pays their taxes?
234
00:09:30,153 --> 00:09:31,321
{\an2}Not Batman
235
00:09:32,489 --> 00:09:35,116
{\an2}How is he beating all of you again?
236
00:09:35,575 --> 00:09:37,160
{\an2}-[groans]
-Because...
237
00:09:37,327 --> 00:09:38,411
{\an2}Hey, hey, hey, hey!
238
00:09:38,578 --> 00:09:39,913
{\an2}I'm Batman!
239
00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:41,372
{\an2}It's gonna blow!
240
00:09:41,539 --> 00:09:43,124
{\an2}I'm Batman!
241
00:09:43,291 --> 00:09:44,334
{\an2}Hey, hey, hey, hey!
242
00:09:44,501 --> 00:09:46,419
{\an2}I'm Batman!
243
00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:51,299
{\an2}Hi, Batman!
So weird to keep running into you.
244
00:09:55,470 --> 00:09:56,805
{\an2}Batman!
245
00:09:57,388 --> 00:09:59,182
{\an2}Looks like your plan failed.
246
00:09:59,349 --> 00:10:03,311
{\an2}Well, it's only a matter of time
before I take over Gotham City.
247
00:10:08,149 --> 00:10:11,111
{\an2}When has that ever happened?
Computer!
248
00:10:11,277 --> 00:10:14,030
{\an2}[Puter] Calculating. Never.
249
00:10:14,364 --> 00:10:15,406
{\an2}-You know why?
-[yelps]
250
00:10:15,573 --> 00:10:17,700
{\an2}Because I'm always
one step ahead of you.
251
00:10:17,867 --> 00:10:19,452
{\an2}And I always get away!
252
00:10:21,538 --> 00:10:23,081
{\an2}Not this time.
253
00:10:25,834 --> 00:10:26,918
{\an2}'Cause this time
254
00:10:27,418 --> 00:10:28,586
{\an2}I got you.
255
00:10:28,753 --> 00:10:29,796
{\an2}Oh, yeah?
256
00:10:29,963 --> 00:10:32,048
{\an2}Well, there's only one problem.
257
00:10:32,715 --> 00:10:34,551
{\an2}Who's gonna defuse the bomb?
258
00:10:34,717 --> 00:10:36,344
{\an2}It's gotta be one or the other, Batman.
259
00:10:36,511 --> 00:10:40,807
{\an2}Save the city,
or catch your greatest enemy.
260
00:10:40,974 --> 00:10:41,975
{\an2}You can't do both.
261
00:10:42,142 --> 00:10:43,143
{\an2}I'm sorry, what did you just say?
262
00:10:43,309 --> 00:10:44,310
{\an2}You can't do both, I said.
263
00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:45,562
{\an2}No, I mean the other thing.
264
00:10:45,728 --> 00:10:47,605
{\an2}Save the city,
or catch your greatest enemy.
265
00:10:47,772 --> 00:10:49,107
{\an2}You think you're my greatest enemy?
266
00:10:49,274 --> 00:10:51,401
{\an2}Yes! You're obsessed with me!
267
00:10:51,568 --> 00:10:52,694
{\an2}[Blows raspberry] No, I'm not.
268
00:10:52,861 --> 00:10:53,945
{\an2}-Yes, you are.
-No, I'm not.
269
00:10:54,112 --> 00:10:57,365
{\an2}Yes, you are! Who else drives you
to one-up them the way that I do?
270
00:10:57,532 --> 00:10:58,867
{\an2}-Bane.
-No, he doesn't!
271
00:10:59,033 --> 00:11:01,119
{\an2}-Superman.
-Superman's not a bad guy!
272
00:11:01,286 --> 00:11:04,164
{\an2}Then I'd say that I don't
currently have a bad guy.
273
00:11:04,330 --> 00:11:06,583
{\an2}I am fighting a few different people.
274
00:11:06,749 --> 00:11:07,750
{\an2}What?
275
00:11:07,917 --> 00:11:08,918
{\an2}I like to fight around.
276
00:11:09,085 --> 00:11:11,629
{\an2}Okay, look, I'm fine with you
fighting other people
277
00:11:11,796 --> 00:11:15,633
{\an2}if you wanna do that,
but what we have is special.
278
00:11:16,092 --> 00:11:17,093
{\an2}So, when people ask you
279
00:11:17,260 --> 00:11:19,095
{\an2}"Who's your number one bad guy?"
You say...
280
00:11:19,262 --> 00:11:20,346
{\an2}Superman.
281
00:11:20,513 --> 00:11:22,473
{\an2}Are you seriously saying
that there is nothing,
282
00:11:22,640 --> 00:11:25,059
{\an2}nothing special about our relationship?
283
00:11:25,602 --> 00:11:26,603
{\an2}Whoa.
284
00:11:26,811 --> 00:11:29,397
{\an2}Let me tell you something, J-bird.
285
00:11:29,564 --> 00:11:33,276
{\an2}-Batman doesn't do 'ships.
-What?
286
00:11:33,443 --> 00:11:35,778
{\an2}As in "relationships."
287
00:11:36,613 --> 00:11:39,282
{\an2}There is no "us."
288
00:11:39,449 --> 00:11:42,702
{\an2}Batman and Joker are not a thing.
289
00:11:43,786 --> 00:11:45,413
{\an2}I don't need you.
290
00:11:46,372 --> 00:11:48,291
{\an2}I don't need anyone.
291
00:11:50,001 --> 00:11:52,962
{\an2}You mean nothing to me.
292
00:11:57,175 --> 00:11:58,968
{\an2}No one does.
293
00:12:00,011 --> 00:12:01,804
{\an2}[bomb timer beeping]
294
00:12:11,439 --> 00:12:12,440
{\an2}[grunting]
295
00:12:22,033 --> 00:12:23,242
{\an2}[snips]
296
00:12:26,287 --> 00:12:28,331
{\an2}-Hurray! Batman!
-[all cheering]
297
00:12:28,498 --> 00:12:29,707
{\an2}You did it!
298
00:12:29,874 --> 00:12:31,084
{\an2}You're welcome.
299
00:12:31,250 --> 00:12:33,002
{\an2}-Thank you, Batman.
-Oh, my pleasure.
300
00:12:34,587 --> 00:12:36,172
{\an2}[woman] Batman, we love you!
301
00:12:36,339 --> 00:12:38,967
{\an2}Thank you!
I'm blushing super hard under the mask.
302
00:12:39,133 --> 00:12:41,719
{\an2}-Grazie, batman! [blows kiss]
-Prego.
303
00:12:41,886 --> 00:12:43,346
{\an2}-[man] You're the best, Batman!
-Oh, I'm humble.
304
00:12:43,513 --> 00:12:46,057
{\an2}-Thanks, Batman!
-I'm super modest about it. Thank you.
305
00:12:46,224 --> 00:12:48,351
{\an2}-Batman, you're the greatest!
-Oh, pray hands, pray hands.
306
00:12:48,977 --> 00:12:51,229
{\an2}-[woman] Thanks for saving the city!
-You're welcome.
307
00:12:51,396 --> 00:12:53,189
{\an2}[man 1] Batman,
I love you more than my kids!
308
00:12:53,356 --> 00:12:54,357
{\an2}[Batman] So do I, guy!
309
00:12:56,609 --> 00:12:58,903
{\an2}[upbeat music playing]
310
00:13:00,697 --> 00:13:02,365
{\an2}[man 2] You're our hero, Batman!
311
00:13:02,532 --> 00:13:04,867
{\an2}[laughs] I love my life.
312
00:13:05,034 --> 00:13:06,035
{\an2}Computer.
313
00:13:06,202 --> 00:13:07,203
{\an2}[Puter] Go ahead.
314
00:13:07,370 --> 00:13:09,080
{\an2}-[Batman] Are we near the orphanage?-Yes.
315
00:13:09,247 --> 00:13:12,458
{\an2}Great.
Let's turn those frowns upside down.
316
00:13:12,667 --> 00:13:14,085
{\an2}[honking Batman theme]
317
00:13:16,504 --> 00:13:17,755
{\an2}That sounds like the Batmobile.
318
00:13:20,508 --> 00:13:21,551
{\an2}No way!
319
00:13:22,135 --> 00:13:23,386
{\an2}Hey, orphans! Look who's here!
320
00:13:23,594 --> 00:13:25,054
{\an2}-[orphans clamoring]
-It's batman!
321
00:13:25,388 --> 00:13:28,224
{\an2}Hey, kids.
Who wants a shot from the merch gun?
322
00:13:28,391 --> 00:13:30,184
{\an2}-[all] I do, I do, I do!
-Great!
323
00:13:30,351 --> 00:13:32,186
{\an2}-Kaboom!
-I got a lunchbox!
324
00:13:32,353 --> 00:13:34,480
{\an2}-Kaboom!
-I got a sippy cup!
325
00:13:34,647 --> 00:13:36,899
{\an2}-Kaboom!
-I got a Batarang!
326
00:13:37,066 --> 00:13:38,735
{\an2}And the rest of you get Bat Bucks.
327
00:13:38,901 --> 00:13:40,236
{\an2}-Kaboom!
-[all cheering]
328
00:13:40,403 --> 00:13:42,405
{\an2}Remember, kids,
if you want to be like Batman,
329
00:13:42,572 --> 00:13:44,073
{\an2}take care of your abs. Batman out!
330
00:13:44,407 --> 00:13:47,118
{\an2}[orphans chanting]
Batman! Batman! Batman!
331
00:13:48,244 --> 00:13:50,496
{\an2}[honking Batman theme]
332
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:55,918
{\an2}Thanks, Batman. You're my hero!
333
00:13:56,127 --> 00:13:58,588
{\an2}[upbeat music continues playing]
334
00:14:00,757 --> 00:14:01,758
{\an2}Whoo!
335
00:14:03,468 --> 00:14:05,094
{\an2}[laughing]
336
00:14:18,024 --> 00:14:19,150
{\an2}[Puter] What is the password?
337
00:14:19,317 --> 00:14:20,777
{\an2}Iron Man sucks.
338
00:14:20,943 --> 00:14:22,028
{\an2}Thank you.
339
00:14:23,279 --> 00:14:25,948
{\an8}It must be great to be Batman.
340
00:14:26,115 --> 00:14:28,284
{\an2}I can only imaginehe is going home right now
341
00:14:28,451 --> 00:14:30,078
{\an2}to party the night away,
342
00:14:30,244 --> 00:14:33,790
{\an2}surrounded by scores of friendsand lady tennis players.
343
00:14:39,295 --> 00:14:41,047
{\an2}[bats squeaking]
344
00:14:43,091 --> 00:14:44,592
{\an2}Hey, Computer.
345
00:14:45,134 --> 00:14:46,135
{\an2}I'm home.
346
00:14:46,344 --> 00:14:47,887
{\an2}[echoing]
347
00:14:50,515 --> 00:14:51,682
{\an2}[Puter] Welcome home, sir.
348
00:14:51,849 --> 00:14:54,685
{\an2}Initializing Batcave operating system.
349
00:14:57,105 --> 00:14:58,106
{\an2}Hey, 'Puter.
350
00:14:59,482 --> 00:15:01,484
{\an2}What's up, Batman?
351
00:15:02,610 --> 00:15:04,237
{\an2}Put this bomb in the museum.
352
00:15:04,404 --> 00:15:05,405
{\an2}Certainly, sir.
353
00:15:06,531 --> 00:15:08,116
{\an2}-Thank you.-No worries.
354
00:15:08,866 --> 00:15:10,827
{\an2}Anything exciting happen
when I was gone?
355
00:15:10,993 --> 00:15:12,370
{\an2}You have four pieces of mail.
356
00:15:12,537 --> 00:15:13,871
{\an2}Great, what'd I get?
357
00:15:14,038 --> 00:15:15,873
{\an2}You have this week's Pennysaver,
358
00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:19,001
{\an2}two bills,and a coupon for Bed Bath and Beyond.
359
00:15:19,168 --> 00:15:21,045
{\an2}It expires in two weeks.
360
00:15:21,212 --> 00:15:24,340
{\an2}But I've heard that some storeswill honor them past the expiry date.
361
00:15:24,507 --> 00:15:25,508
{\an2}Copy that.
362
00:15:25,675 --> 00:15:29,720
{\an2}Also, Alfred is on the 17th floor,grouting tiles in the second bathroom
363
00:15:29,887 --> 00:15:31,264
{\an2}of the fifth master bedroom.
364
00:15:32,140 --> 00:15:34,058
{\an2}Do you want me to tell Alfredyou're home?
365
00:15:34,225 --> 00:15:36,978
{\an2}No, that's cool, Computer.
Thanks for the update.
366
00:15:37,145 --> 00:15:38,855
{\an2}I should probably
have some dinner.
367
00:15:39,021 --> 00:15:41,357
{\an2}Alfred left your lobster thermidorin the fridge.
368
00:15:41,524 --> 00:15:42,525
{\an2}Oh, that's my favorite.
369
00:15:43,109 --> 00:15:44,861
{\an2}I can't wait.
370
00:16:02,712 --> 00:16:06,048
{\an2}Oh, not 20 minutes. Stupid.
371
00:16:22,732 --> 00:16:23,941
{\an2}[sighs]
372
00:16:25,651 --> 00:16:26,986
{\an2}[smacks lips rhythmically]
373
00:16:54,013 --> 00:16:55,973
{\an2}[strumming]
374
00:16:56,224 --> 00:16:57,266
{\an2}[clears throat]
375
00:16:57,433 --> 00:16:58,893
{\an2}[playing guitar solo]
376
00:17:14,575 --> 00:17:16,118
{\an2}Oh, wait.
377
00:17:16,285 --> 00:17:18,663
{\an2}There, which one is, uh...
378
00:17:19,622 --> 00:17:20,623
{\an2}Okay.
379
00:17:21,624 --> 00:17:23,292
{\an2}[slow music playing]
380
00:17:29,131 --> 00:17:31,842
{\an2}[Jerry Maguire]
You complete me.
381
00:17:32,009 --> 00:17:33,010
{\an2}[laughs]
382
00:17:33,177 --> 00:17:36,472
{\an2}[Dorothy Boyd sniffles]
Shut up. You had me at hello.
383
00:17:36,639 --> 00:17:38,057
{\an2}[laughing]
384
00:17:38,266 --> 00:17:39,433
{\an2}Love it!
385
00:17:45,273 --> 00:17:46,399
{\an2}[sighs]
386
00:18:18,014 --> 00:18:19,307
{\an2}Hey, Mom.
387
00:18:20,349 --> 00:18:21,809
{\an2}Hey, Dad.
388
00:18:23,227 --> 00:18:24,312
{\an2}I, uh...
389
00:18:24,729 --> 00:18:26,689
{\an2}I saved the city again today.
390
00:18:30,526 --> 00:18:32,278
{\an2}I wish you could have seen me.
391
00:18:34,030 --> 00:18:36,324
{\an2}I think you would have been
really proud.
392
00:18:39,035 --> 00:18:40,161
{\an2}-There you are!
-[grunts]
393
00:18:41,704 --> 00:18:44,373
{\an2}Oh! Alfred! I am so sorry.
394
00:18:44,540 --> 00:18:45,958
{\an2}I have incredible reflexes.
395
00:18:46,125 --> 00:18:47,543
{\an2}No, it's all my fault, sir.
396
00:18:47,710 --> 00:18:49,795
{\an2}I should have known better
than to sneak up on you like that.
397
00:18:49,962 --> 00:18:52,548
{\an2}Sorry, I was just lost in thought,
and as you know,
398
00:18:52,715 --> 00:18:54,300
{\an2}when I'm in there, I'm in deep.
399
00:18:54,467 --> 00:18:56,761
{\an2}Were you looking
at the old family pictures again?
400
00:18:57,303 --> 00:18:59,555
{\an2}At the what? The old family...
401
00:18:59,722 --> 00:19:01,724
{\an2}Oh, yes! I see what you mean.
402
00:19:01,891 --> 00:19:04,268
{\an2}Look at that! The old gang.
403
00:19:04,435 --> 00:19:06,395
{\an2}Yeah. No, I wasn't.
404
00:19:07,563 --> 00:19:08,898
{\an2}I see.
405
00:19:09,065 --> 00:19:12,443
{\an2}Sir, if you don't mind my saying,
I'm a little concerned.
406
00:19:12,610 --> 00:19:18,240
{\an2}I've seen you go through similar phases
in 2016 and 2012 and 2008 and 2005
407
00:19:18,407 --> 00:19:21,410
{\an2}and 1997 and 1995 and 1992 and 1989
408
00:19:21,577 --> 00:19:25,039
{\an2}and that weird one in 1966.
409
00:19:25,206 --> 00:19:28,000
{\an2}Do you want to talk about
how you're feeling right now?
410
00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:30,252
{\an2}I don't talk about feelings, Alfred.
411
00:19:30,419 --> 00:19:32,004
{\an2}I don't have any, I've never seen one.
412
00:19:32,171 --> 00:19:34,965
{\an2}I'm a night-stalking,
crime-fighting vigilante,
413
00:19:35,132 --> 00:19:36,801
{\an2}and a heavy metal rapping machine.
414
00:19:36,967 --> 00:19:40,012
{\an2}I don't feel anything emotionally,
except for rage.
415
00:19:40,179 --> 00:19:43,933
{\an2}24/7, 365, at a million percent.
416
00:19:44,100 --> 00:19:46,644
{\an2}And if you think that there's something
behind that, then you're crazy.
417
00:19:46,811 --> 00:19:47,812
{\an2}Good night, Alfred.
418
00:19:47,978 --> 00:19:49,188
{\an2}Sir, it's morning.
419
00:19:50,106 --> 00:19:51,774
{\an2}[hissing and groaning]
420
00:19:51,941 --> 00:19:55,945
{\an2}Master Bruce, you live on an island,
figuratively and literally.
421
00:19:56,112 --> 00:19:57,363
{\an2}[Batman] Yeah. I love it.
422
00:19:57,530 --> 00:19:59,240
{\an2}You can't spend
the rest of your life alone,
423
00:19:59,407 --> 00:20:00,533
{\an2}dressed in black,
424
00:20:00,700 --> 00:20:02,952
{\an2}listening to angry music,
and staying up all night.
425
00:20:03,119 --> 00:20:05,621
{\an2}Yes, I can, 'cause I'm Batman.
426
00:20:05,788 --> 00:20:08,833
{\an2}But don't you think it's time
427
00:20:08,999 --> 00:20:12,044
{\an2}you finally faced your greatest fear?
428
00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:13,212
{\an2}-Snakes?
-No.
429
00:20:13,379 --> 00:20:14,380
{\an2}-Clowns?
-No.
430
00:20:14,547 --> 00:20:15,631
{\an2}Snake clowns?
431
00:20:15,798 --> 00:20:16,966
{\an2}Bruce, listen.
432
00:20:18,050 --> 00:20:20,177
{\an2}Your greatest fear is
433
00:20:21,303 --> 00:20:23,723
{\an2}being a part of a family again.
434
00:20:33,190 --> 00:20:36,152
{\an2}Nope. Now it's snake clowns,
because you put that idea in my head.
435
00:20:36,318 --> 00:20:37,737
{\an2}-Sir?
-Time for push-ups!
436
00:20:37,903 --> 00:20:39,822
{\an2}One, two... We're going to 1,000.
437
00:20:39,989 --> 00:20:41,449
{\an2}I'm afraid that's not possible, sir.
438
00:20:41,615 --> 00:20:43,409
{\an2}It is possible. I'm already at 20.
439
00:20:43,576 --> 00:20:46,328
{\an2}You're scheduled to go to
Jim Gordon's retirement party.
440
00:20:46,495 --> 00:20:49,623
{\an2}What? No. I don't wanna do that.
441
00:20:49,790 --> 00:20:51,625
{\an2}-You're going to have a great time!
-No, no, no.
442
00:20:51,792 --> 00:20:53,043
{\an2}You might meet some new people!
443
00:20:53,210 --> 00:20:54,378
{\an2}No, no, no!
444
00:20:54,545 --> 00:20:55,588
{\an2}You could even make some new friends.
445
00:20:55,755 --> 00:20:59,425
{\an2}No, no, no, no. No, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
446
00:20:59,633 --> 00:21:01,844
{\an2}[beatboxing] No!
447
00:21:02,011 --> 00:21:04,764
{\an2}And before you go,
we can do your favorite thing.
448
00:21:05,014 --> 00:21:07,016
{\an2}[gasps] Tuxedo dress-up party.
449
00:21:07,349 --> 00:21:08,976
{\an2}[disco music playing]
450
00:21:15,107 --> 00:21:16,108
{\an2}[laughs]
451
00:21:16,275 --> 00:21:18,027
{\an2}Sir, aren't you forgetting something?
452
00:21:18,235 --> 00:21:20,279
{\an2}-Nope.
-Your cowl.
453
00:21:20,446 --> 00:21:21,697
{\an2}My what, now?
454
00:21:21,864 --> 00:21:25,284
{\an2}[sighs] Your armored face disguise?
455
00:21:27,536 --> 00:21:28,537
{\an2}Fine.
456
00:21:30,414 --> 00:21:32,291
{\an2}-Happy now?
-Indubitably.
457
00:21:32,458 --> 00:21:34,502
{\an2}Good. Must be nice to be happy.
458
00:21:34,668 --> 00:21:36,921
{\an2}[Pippa]
Tonight, on Metropolis in Focus,
459
00:21:37,171 --> 00:21:39,590
{\an2}we have our favorite star, Superman!
460
00:21:39,757 --> 00:21:41,509
{\an2}What up, Gotham!
461
00:21:41,717 --> 00:21:42,718
{\an2}[blows raspberry]
462
00:21:42,968 --> 00:21:45,012
{\an2}Superman, tell me.How do you feel
463
00:21:45,179 --> 00:21:48,182
{\an2}about your recent banishmentof Zod to the Phantom Zone?
464
00:21:48,349 --> 00:21:51,644
{\an2}Yeah, look, Pippa, it's...It's complicated. Okay?
465
00:21:51,811 --> 00:21:55,773
{\an2}Zod and I, we've had somepretty epic battles over the years.
466
00:21:56,148 --> 00:21:57,316
{\an2}[sighs]
467
00:21:57,483 --> 00:22:00,569
{\an2}I don't believe I would be Supermanwithout fighting Zod.
468
00:22:00,736 --> 00:22:05,115
{\an2}See? Superman gets it.
Why can't Batman?
469
00:22:05,282 --> 00:22:08,869
{\an2}Check it out, guys.
I built a CD rack. Ta-da!
470
00:22:10,746 --> 00:22:12,998
{\an2}And how am I supposed to get
Batman's respect
471
00:22:13,165 --> 00:22:16,126
{\an2}when I'm working
with these human farts?
472
00:22:16,293 --> 00:22:17,920
{\an2}Boo-boo, look at me.
473
00:22:18,379 --> 00:22:21,507
{\an2}You're too good for Batman.
He needs to open his eyes
474
00:22:21,674 --> 00:22:24,093
{\an2}and see what it feels like
when you're not around. Okay?
475
00:22:24,260 --> 00:22:27,263
{\an8}Yeah, Pippa. I couldn't put Zodin a regular prison, right?
476
00:22:27,429 --> 00:22:28,847
{\an8}He's Zod. Come on!
477
00:22:29,473 --> 00:22:30,599
{\an8}No, he needed to go someplace
478
00:22:30,766 --> 00:22:33,602
{\an8}where he could never harmMetropolis ever again.
479
00:22:34,979 --> 00:22:36,230
{\an8}The Phantom Zone.
480
00:22:36,397 --> 00:22:38,440
{\an8}[Pippa] Ah, yes, the notorious space jail
481
00:22:38,607 --> 00:22:40,985
{\an8}that houses the greatestsuper-villains of all time.
482
00:22:41,151 --> 00:22:43,946
{\an8}They've got, like,the sickest baddies up there.
483
00:22:44,113 --> 00:22:45,197
{\an2}They got, like, this guy.
484
00:22:45,364 --> 00:22:47,157
{\an2}-And her.
-[Wicked Witch] I'll get you, my pretty!
485
00:22:47,324 --> 00:22:49,785
{\an2}[Superman] To say nothing about him.
[Voldemort] Wingardium Leviosa!
486
00:22:49,952 --> 00:22:50,953
{\an2}[Superman] And these guys.
487
00:22:51,120 --> 00:22:52,121
{\an2}[Daleks] Exterminate!
488
00:22:52,288 --> 00:22:55,624
{\an2}I'm starting to get an idea,
monkey face.
489
00:22:55,958 --> 00:22:58,877
{\an2}-[jazz music playing]
-[crowd cheering]
490
00:23:01,130 --> 00:23:02,131
{\an2}[reporter] Bruce, over here!
491
00:23:02,298 --> 00:23:03,632
{\an2}Okay, shutterbugs.
Look alive, here we go.
492
00:23:03,799 --> 00:23:04,967
{\an2}I'm gonna give you three poses. You ready?
493
00:23:05,134 --> 00:23:06,135
{\an2}Kissy face.
494
00:23:06,302 --> 00:23:07,553
{\an2}Oops, I did it again.
495
00:23:07,720 --> 00:23:09,805
{\an2}And the Bad Boys. What you gonna do?
496
00:23:09,972 --> 00:23:12,141
{\an2}I'm out of here, guys. Thank you.
497
00:23:12,308 --> 00:23:14,727
{\an2}-Congresswoman.
-Mr. Wayne, good to see you.
498
00:23:15,144 --> 00:23:16,478
{\an2}-Senator, looking great.-Bruce.
499
00:23:16,729 --> 00:23:19,982
{\an2}[singing] I'm starting withthe man in the mirror
500
00:23:20,149 --> 00:23:21,525
{\an2}Bruce, any advice
for the new commissioner?
501
00:23:21,692 --> 00:23:24,236
{\an2}Long as he knows how to push the button
for the Bat-Signal, he'll be fine.
502
00:23:24,403 --> 00:23:25,904
{\an2}Bruce, I don't know how you did it.
503
00:23:26,071 --> 00:23:27,489
{\an2}You can't prove it, you didn't do it.
504
00:23:27,656 --> 00:23:29,158
{\an2}Mr. Wayne, so great to see you!
Come and join us!
505
00:23:29,325 --> 00:23:30,659
{\an2}Mr. Prime Minister.
506
00:23:30,826 --> 00:23:32,161
{\an2}Did you have some work done?
507
00:23:34,121 --> 00:23:35,122
{\an2}No way!
508
00:23:36,624 --> 00:23:37,833
{\an2}Bruce Wayne!
509
00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:39,793
{\an2}He's the greatest orphan of all time.
510
00:23:39,960 --> 00:23:42,838
{\an2}[all singing] ShamonShamon
511
00:23:43,005 --> 00:23:45,049
{\an2}-Nice to see you, Mr. Ambassador.
-Mr. Wayne!
512
00:23:45,215 --> 00:23:47,051
{\an2}-You want a picture?
-That would be swell!
513
00:23:47,217 --> 00:23:48,802
{\an2}-Here we go. Party face!
-[camera clicks]
514
00:23:48,969 --> 00:23:50,262
{\an2}Boom. Keep it.
515
00:23:50,429 --> 00:23:51,430
{\an2}Whoa! Thanks, Mr. Wayne.
516
00:23:51,597 --> 00:23:52,640
{\an2}Call me Bruce, champ.
517
00:23:52,806 --> 00:23:54,266
{\an2}I'm just so jazzed to meet you, sir.
518
00:23:54,433 --> 00:23:55,851
{\an2}I'm sorry, did you say "jazzed?"
519
00:23:56,018 --> 00:23:57,645
{\an2}Yes! My name's Richard Grayson,
520
00:23:57,811 --> 00:23:59,355
{\an2}but all the kids at the orphanage
call me Dick.
521
00:23:59,521 --> 00:24:01,148
{\an2}-Well, children can be cruel.
-Yeah.
522
00:24:01,315 --> 00:24:02,524
{\an2}-Great to see you, Bruce.
-Nice to see you, sir.
523
00:24:02,691 --> 00:24:04,985
{\an2}-So, I had a question for you, sir.
-Okay, hit me with it.
524
00:24:05,152 --> 00:24:06,820
{\an2}Do you have any advice
on how to get adopted?
525
00:24:06,987 --> 00:24:08,197
{\an2}-Oh, yeah.
-Oh, you do?
526
00:24:08,364 --> 00:24:09,615
{\an2}-Mr. Wayne, can I get an autograph?
-Sure.
527
00:24:09,865 --> 00:24:12,034
{\an2}Um, all right, for example,
is teeth whitener a good idea?
528
00:24:12,201 --> 00:24:13,452
{\an2}-Yes. There you go, pal.
-Thanks!
529
00:24:13,619 --> 00:24:14,620
{\an2}-Really?
-Oh, yeah.
530
00:24:14,787 --> 00:24:16,330
{\an2}-Looking good, Bruce.
-Thank you so much.
531
00:24:16,497 --> 00:24:18,332
{\an2}How about eyeliner
or a foreign language?
532
00:24:18,499 --> 00:24:19,875
{\an2}-Try both.
-Bueno.
533
00:24:20,042 --> 00:24:21,335
{\an2}Look, it's the new commissioner!
534
00:24:21,502 --> 00:24:23,379
{\an2}-Where? Oh, she's with the mayor!
-Okay. Let's see.
535
00:24:23,545 --> 00:24:24,797
{\an2}Here she is, everyone!
536
00:24:24,963 --> 00:24:26,382
{\an2}-Oh, my darling!
-Hi, Dad.
537
00:24:26,548 --> 00:24:27,716
{\an2}[gasps]
538
00:24:27,925 --> 00:24:30,010
{\an2}[romantic music playing]
539
00:24:32,012 --> 00:24:33,013
{\an2}[Dick] Mr. Wayne?
540
00:24:33,764 --> 00:24:36,141
{\an2}Should I get experimental surgery
to make my eyes larger
541
00:24:36,308 --> 00:24:37,685
{\an2}and more vulnerable-looking?
542
00:24:38,852 --> 00:24:40,396
{\an2}Uh, do that.
543
00:24:41,146 --> 00:24:42,690
{\an2}[laughing]
544
00:24:49,154 --> 00:24:50,739
{\an2}Uh, Mr. Wayne?
545
00:24:50,906 --> 00:24:53,158
{\an2}Are you currently in the market
to adopt a child?
546
00:24:53,659 --> 00:24:55,077
{\an2}-Yeah.
-Really?
547
00:24:55,244 --> 00:24:56,912
{\an2}-Oh, yeah.
-[laughs] Wow.
548
00:24:57,079 --> 00:24:58,789
{\an2}Are you looking for more
of a base model orphan
549
00:24:58,956 --> 00:25:01,208
{\an2}-or one that has more upgraded features?
-Yep.
550
00:25:01,375 --> 00:25:02,710
{\an2}Like cooking or driftwood art?
551
00:25:02,876 --> 00:25:04,002
{\an2}-Gymnastic abilities?
-Yep. Yep.
552
00:25:04,169 --> 00:25:05,838
{\an2}Close-up street magic à la David Blaine?
553
00:25:06,004 --> 00:25:07,756
{\an2}-All of it sounds great.
-Really?
554
00:25:07,923 --> 00:25:11,385
{\an2}Because all of it sounds like me.
555
00:25:11,552 --> 00:25:14,388
{\an2}Mr. Wayne, do you think you'd be
interested in adopting me
556
00:25:14,555 --> 00:25:16,223
{\an2}as your future orphan son?
557
00:25:16,390 --> 00:25:17,391
{\an2}Definitely.
558
00:25:17,558 --> 00:25:18,851
{\an2}Oh, this is great!
559
00:25:19,017 --> 00:25:22,271
{\an2}Because all I want is to get adopted,
so I can finally stop being
560
00:25:24,857 --> 00:25:26,150
{\an2}alone.
561
00:25:27,359 --> 00:25:28,485
{\an2}[McCaskill] We've gathered here tonight
562
00:25:28,652 --> 00:25:30,821
{\an2}to mark the retirement of Jim Gordon.
563
00:25:30,988 --> 00:25:31,989
{\an2}Goodbye.
564
00:25:32,156 --> 00:25:36,869
{\an2}And we wish him wellon his South African jungle safari!
565
00:25:37,035 --> 00:25:38,078
{\an2}-[all cheering]
-Thank you.
566
00:25:38,287 --> 00:25:39,997
{\an2}Now, to introduce you
567
00:25:40,164 --> 00:25:42,166
{\an2}to his exciting new replacement.
568
00:25:42,332 --> 00:25:44,918
{\an2}Everyone, meet your new commissioner!
569
00:25:45,127 --> 00:25:46,128
{\an2}[pop music playing]
570
00:25:47,212 --> 00:25:49,465
{\an8}[announcer] Meet Barbara Gordon!
571
00:25:49,631 --> 00:25:53,802
{\an8}-The new commissioner of Gotham City!
-Whoa!
572
00:25:54,011 --> 00:25:57,473
{\an2}She was top of her classat Harvard for Police.
573
00:25:57,639 --> 00:26:01,477
{\an2}She cleaned up the streetsof Gotham's nearby sister city Blüdhaven
574
00:26:01,643 --> 00:26:03,479
{\an2}using statistics
575
00:26:04,188 --> 00:26:05,981
{\an2}and compassion.
576
00:26:06,148 --> 00:26:08,817
{\an2}And now she's bringing her new ideas
577
00:26:08,984 --> 00:26:12,613
{\an2}and her nunchucks to Gotham City.
578
00:26:12,780 --> 00:26:14,698
{\an2}Congratulations, darling.
579
00:26:14,865 --> 00:26:16,784
{\an2}-Thanks, Dad.
-Here she is, everyone!
580
00:26:16,950 --> 00:26:18,285
{\an2}Thank you! Thanks!
581
00:26:18,452 --> 00:26:19,661
{\an2}Hurray!
582
00:26:19,828 --> 00:26:20,913
{\an2}[reporter 1] Ms. Gordon, over here!
583
00:26:21,079 --> 00:26:22,456
{\an2}-[reporter 2] Big smile!
-Wow.
584
00:26:22,623 --> 00:26:25,292
{\an2}Thank you for the oversized keyto Arkham Asylum.
585
00:26:25,459 --> 00:26:27,252
{\an2}And, uh, what's this?
586
00:26:27,419 --> 00:26:30,714
{\an2}Thank you for the switchto the Bat-Signal.
587
00:26:30,881 --> 00:26:32,090
{\an2}Nice.
588
00:26:32,299 --> 00:26:33,342
{\an2}[clears throat]
589
00:26:33,550 --> 00:26:38,472
{\an2}Dad, you've always done a great jobprotecting Gotham City.
590
00:26:38,639 --> 00:26:40,724
{\an2}Flip! [chuckles] That's me.
591
00:26:40,891 --> 00:26:43,560
{\an2}Thank you.Along with Batman, of course.
592
00:26:43,727 --> 00:26:45,187
{\an2}Whoo! Let's hear it for Batman!
593
00:26:45,354 --> 00:26:46,980
{\an2}Who I wish was here right now.
594
00:26:47,147 --> 00:26:48,690
{\an2}[Bruce] Oh, I'm sure he's listening.
595
00:26:48,857 --> 00:26:50,526
{\an2}I'd like to ask all of you a question.
596
00:26:50,692 --> 00:26:52,694
{\an2}Are you fed up with crime?
597
00:26:52,986 --> 00:26:55,113
{\an2}-Uh-huh. We're all tired of crime.
-Yeah, we're sick of it.
598
00:26:55,280 --> 00:26:57,533
{\an2}Great. Then let's talk aboutreal improvements
599
00:26:57,699 --> 00:26:59,535
{\an2}that will end the cycle of crime.
600
00:26:59,868 --> 00:27:03,288
{\an2}I've got a four-point pilot programthat I'd love to share with you.
601
00:27:03,455 --> 00:27:05,040
{\an2}I wanna hear all four points.
602
00:27:05,207 --> 00:27:06,375
{\an2}-It's called...
-I am ready.
603
00:27:06,542 --> 00:27:07,543
{\an2}It takes a village...
604
00:27:07,709 --> 00:27:08,919
{\an2}Best opening to a title ever.
605
00:27:09,086 --> 00:27:10,587
{\an2}Not a Batman.
606
00:27:11,380 --> 00:27:12,381
{\an2}-Waiter.
-Sir?
607
00:27:12,548 --> 00:27:13,549
{\an2}-Can I?
-Of course.
608
00:27:13,715 --> 00:27:14,883
{\an2}-Thank you.
-My pleasure.
609
00:27:15,050 --> 00:27:16,051
{\an2}Thanks so much.
610
00:27:16,260 --> 00:27:17,261
{\an2}[gulping]
611
00:27:18,387 --> 00:27:19,972
{\an2}-What?
-Look.
612
00:27:20,138 --> 00:27:24,059
{\an2}Batman's been on the jobfor a very, very, very,
613
00:27:24,226 --> 00:27:27,563
{\an2}very, very, very, very, very long time.
614
00:27:27,729 --> 00:27:29,398
{\an2}He has aged phenomenally.
615
00:27:29,565 --> 00:27:33,569
{\an2}However, despite all the great workBatman has done for us,
616
00:27:33,735 --> 00:27:38,407
{\an2}Gotham City is still the mostcrime-ridden city in the world.
617
00:27:38,574 --> 00:27:39,658
{\an2}-She's got a great point.
-Interesting.
618
00:27:39,825 --> 00:27:41,702
{\an2}Historically speaking, that is accurate.
619
00:27:41,910 --> 00:27:43,495
{\an2}-He hasn't captured Riddler.
-[man] You know, she's right.
620
00:27:43,787 --> 00:27:44,872
{\an2}He hasn't captured Bane.
621
00:27:45,038 --> 00:27:46,957
{\an2}-Huh!
-Or Catwoman.
622
00:27:47,124 --> 00:27:51,086
{\an2}Or Two-Face,or any of Gotham's other villains!
623
00:27:51,253 --> 00:27:52,254
{\an2}He's not good at his job.
624
00:27:52,421 --> 00:27:53,881
{\an2}Including the Joker!
625
00:27:54,047 --> 00:27:55,924
{\an2}-She's making a lot of sense.
-[clears throat]
626
00:27:56,174 --> 00:27:57,759
{\an2}Excuse me. I'm so sorry. Excuse me.
627
00:27:57,926 --> 00:27:59,386
{\an2}-[clearing throat]
-[man] We love you, Barbara!
628
00:27:59,595 --> 00:28:01,346
{\an2}-Yes.
-Hi. Bruce Wayne.
629
00:28:01,513 --> 00:28:03,932
{\an2}Billionaire, bon vivant,
gallivanter, playboy,
630
00:28:04,099 --> 00:28:06,768
{\an8}Gotham's most eligible bachelor,
like, 90 years in a row.
631
00:28:06,935 --> 00:28:08,770
{\an8}-That's me right there.
-I know who you are, Mr. Wayne.
632
00:28:08,979 --> 00:28:13,108
{\an2}You bet you do. Quick quest,
what is your problem with Batman,
633
00:28:13,275 --> 00:28:15,611
{\an2}and also, what the heck, dude?
634
00:28:15,777 --> 00:28:17,237
{\an2}I'm glad you asked, Mr. Wayne.
635
00:28:17,404 --> 00:28:19,448
{\an2}I'm not a Batman hater.
636
00:28:19,615 --> 00:28:22,034
{\an2}But we don't needan unsupervised adult man
637
00:28:22,200 --> 00:28:24,828
{\an2}karate-chopping poor peoplein a Halloween costume.
638
00:28:25,203 --> 00:28:27,789
{\an2}We need to takewhat's good about Batman,
639
00:28:27,998 --> 00:28:32,544
{\an2}and marry it to actual lawsand proper ethics
640
00:28:32,711 --> 00:28:33,879
{\an2}and accountability.
641
00:28:34,296 --> 00:28:35,464
{\an2}I hate everything you just said.
642
00:28:35,631 --> 00:28:40,552
{\an2}Because my dream is for the police forceto team up with Batman.
643
00:28:40,719 --> 00:28:41,720
{\an2}Waiter.
644
00:28:41,887 --> 00:28:43,639
{\an2}-Wouldn't that be better?
-[Bruce spitting]
645
00:28:43,805 --> 00:28:47,017
{\an2}And I know that, together,the world's greatest detective...
646
00:28:47,684 --> 00:28:49,603
{\an2}-[Joker giggling]
-And Gotham's finest
647
00:28:49,811 --> 00:28:51,813
{\an2}could clean upthese crime-ridden streets.
648
00:28:52,147 --> 00:28:53,565
{\an2}-[carnival music playing]
-[giggling continues]
649
00:28:54,149 --> 00:28:55,275
{\an2}Forever.
650
00:28:55,442 --> 00:28:56,902
{\an2}[both] Everybody, get down!
651
00:28:57,486 --> 00:28:59,154
{\an2}[people screaming]
652
00:28:59,321 --> 00:29:01,323
{\an2}Grand entrance!
[imitates guns firing]
653
00:29:01,823 --> 00:29:04,284
{\an2}Everyone! Make your wayto the exits immediately!
654
00:29:04,493 --> 00:29:05,702
{\an2}[woman] Run!
655
00:29:05,869 --> 00:29:07,829
{\an2}Team Bane, block the exits.
656
00:29:07,996 --> 00:29:09,248
{\an2}Going somewhere?
657
00:29:09,498 --> 00:29:12,209
{\an2}Clayface, Freeze, bring me
the new Commissioner Gordon.
658
00:29:12,376 --> 00:29:14,002
{\an2}-We're on it.
-Cool.
659
00:29:14,169 --> 00:29:15,879
{\an2}And, Harley, you know what to do.
660
00:29:16,046 --> 00:29:17,047
{\an2}I sure do.
661
00:29:17,256 --> 00:29:20,801
{\an2}It's time for Operation
"Take Out the Laundry."
662
00:29:21,051 --> 00:29:23,971
{\an2}[grunts] Butler One, this is Bat One.
Do you copy?
663
00:29:24,179 --> 00:29:26,974
{\an2}-Go ahead, Bat One.
-I need my armored face disguise, now!
664
00:29:27,140 --> 00:29:28,350
{\an2}Only if you say the magic word.
665
00:29:28,517 --> 00:29:29,601
{\an2}-Now!
-No.
666
00:29:29,768 --> 00:29:32,521
{\an8}-You're fired.
-No. Sir, we'll talk about this
667
00:29:32,688 --> 00:29:33,730
{\an8}back at the Batcave.
668
00:29:36,024 --> 00:29:37,067
{\an2}-Hey, 'Puter.
-[Puter] Yes?
669
00:29:37,234 --> 00:29:38,944
{\an2}Initialize masterbuild music.
670
00:29:39,111 --> 00:29:40,279
{\an2}Right away.
671
00:29:40,946 --> 00:29:44,032
{\an2}Collateral damage assessmentsuggests the Scuttler, sir.
672
00:29:44,199 --> 00:29:45,325
{\an2}Good plan.
673
00:29:50,205 --> 00:29:52,207
{\an2}[grunts] Madam Mayor, stay close to me.
674
00:29:52,374 --> 00:29:53,375
{\an2}Head for the south exit.
675
00:29:53,917 --> 00:29:55,002
{\an2}Now, ma'am.
676
00:29:55,961 --> 00:29:56,962
{\an2}[groans]
677
00:29:57,129 --> 00:29:58,130
{\an2}Go! Go! Go!
678
00:29:58,297 --> 00:29:59,715
{\an2}Honey, let Batman take care of it.
679
00:29:59,881 --> 00:30:01,216
{\an2}Dad, I got this.
680
00:30:01,383 --> 00:30:02,551
{\an2}[grunting]
681
00:30:13,562 --> 00:30:15,063
{\an2}[Puter] Scuttler online.
682
00:30:15,230 --> 00:30:17,357
{\an2}Chief O'Hara, we're coming in hot!
683
00:30:17,524 --> 00:30:19,026
{\an2}I'm almost there.
684
00:30:19,860 --> 00:30:21,611
{\an2}[screams]
685
00:30:23,572 --> 00:30:25,115
{\an2}[Barbara] Chief, get the mayor to safety.
686
00:30:26,241 --> 00:30:28,535
{\an2}[Batman] Computer,
I've got the Joker in my sights.
687
00:30:28,702 --> 00:30:30,746
{\an2}Team, I got the Joker in my sights.
688
00:30:35,250 --> 00:30:36,251
{\an2}Joker!
689
00:30:36,418 --> 00:30:37,419
{\an2}Joker.
690
00:30:37,586 --> 00:30:39,171
{\an2}Uh, excuse me? I was about to--
691
00:30:39,338 --> 00:30:42,090
{\an2}Push the Bat-Signal? Good call.
I like your instincts.
692
00:30:42,257 --> 00:30:44,217
{\an2}[Joker] I've got a surprise for you guys.
693
00:30:44,384 --> 00:30:46,428
{\an2}And it's gonna make you smile.
694
00:30:46,595 --> 00:30:48,597
{\an2}Uh-oh! His smile is our grimace.
695
00:30:48,764 --> 00:30:49,765
{\an2}Everybody, get down.
696
00:30:49,931 --> 00:30:51,683
{\an2}-I...
-Joker, no!
697
00:30:52,601 --> 00:30:53,769
{\an2}Surrender.
698
00:30:54,144 --> 00:30:55,604
{\an2}What?
699
00:30:56,563 --> 00:30:58,398
{\an2}Uh, what did you just say?
700
00:30:58,565 --> 00:31:01,818
{\an2}I said, "I surrender."
701
00:31:01,985 --> 00:31:03,111
{\an2}[King Tut] Joker, what are you doing?
702
00:31:03,445 --> 00:31:05,197
{\an2}I'm sorry, my Bat-ears
must be malfunctioning
703
00:31:05,364 --> 00:31:06,365
{\an2}because it sounds--
704
00:31:06,531 --> 00:31:07,532
{\an2}I surrender!
705
00:31:07,699 --> 00:31:10,118
{\an2}Okay, you know what? Cool it.
You're a criminal.
706
00:31:10,285 --> 00:31:12,329
{\an2}-[tutting]
-You run, and I catch you.
707
00:31:12,496 --> 00:31:13,789
{\an2}Not anymore, Batman.
708
00:31:13,955 --> 00:31:15,999
{\an2}You were right. There is no "us."
709
00:31:16,166 --> 00:31:19,461
{\an2}So, there's no point
in me trying to fight you anymore.
710
00:31:19,628 --> 00:31:21,963
{\an2}Therefore, I will be surrendering myself
711
00:31:22,130 --> 00:31:24,841
{\an2}to our strong-willed and
forward-thinking new commissioner.
712
00:31:25,008 --> 00:31:26,551
{\an2}Blink, blink, blink.
Blinkety blink, blink, blink!
713
00:31:26,718 --> 00:31:27,719
{\an2}That's really suspicious.
714
00:31:27,886 --> 00:31:30,097
{\an2}Yeah, it is. What are you up to, Joker?
715
00:31:30,263 --> 00:31:32,724
{\an2}I just wanna go to Arkham
and pay for all of my crimes.
716
00:31:32,891 --> 00:31:34,476
{\an2}Blink, blink, blink.
Blinkety blink, blink, blink!
717
00:31:34,643 --> 00:31:36,686
{\an2}Are you actually saying "blink?"
718
00:31:36,853 --> 00:31:38,146
{\an2}No! Blink, blink, blink.
719
00:31:38,313 --> 00:31:39,314
{\an2}Joker! That's enough.
720
00:31:39,481 --> 00:31:41,024
{\an2}Okay, Babs. I got this.
721
00:31:41,191 --> 00:31:44,653
{\an2}Not so fast, Batman.
You can't fight me anymore.
722
00:31:44,820 --> 00:31:45,821
{\an2}I'm off the market.
723
00:31:45,987 --> 00:31:47,697
{\an2}What are you talking about?
724
00:31:47,864 --> 00:31:49,699
{\an2}I'm off the menu.
725
00:31:49,866 --> 00:31:52,661
{\an2}You won't get to fight
any of this anymore.
726
00:31:52,994 --> 00:31:54,663
{\an2}Man, am I sorry I asked.
727
00:31:54,830 --> 00:31:57,666
{\an2}Anyway, have fun in jail and--
728
00:31:57,833 --> 00:31:59,042
{\an2}Batman, what are you doing?
729
00:31:59,292 --> 00:32:01,044
{\an2}-[grunts]
-Punching Bane.
730
00:32:01,211 --> 00:32:02,838
{\an2}That was unnecessary.
731
00:32:03,004 --> 00:32:05,298
{\an2}Oh, no, you can't fight Bane
anymore either.
732
00:32:05,465 --> 00:32:06,550
{\an2}-Really?
-[Bane groans]
733
00:32:06,716 --> 00:32:08,677
{\an2}-Yeah. Or Riddler.
-[super-villains groaning]
734
00:32:08,844 --> 00:32:10,345
{\an2}Or Catwoman. Or Condiment King.
735
00:32:11,096 --> 00:32:12,097
{\an2}Why not?
736
00:32:12,264 --> 00:32:16,017
{\an2}Because we're all surrendering.
Right, guys?
737
00:32:16,184 --> 00:32:17,185
{\an2}[all] We are?
738
00:32:17,352 --> 00:32:18,478
{\an2}Yes!
739
00:32:20,522 --> 00:32:21,606
{\an2}[laughs mockingly]
740
00:32:22,691 --> 00:32:23,692
{\an2}[super-villains yelp]
741
00:32:24,359 --> 00:32:25,402
{\an2}[all gasp]
742
00:32:25,986 --> 00:32:28,530
{\an2}[Riddler] Riddle me this.
What just happened?
743
00:32:28,905 --> 00:32:30,365
{\an2}It's the end of crime!
744
00:32:30,907 --> 00:32:31,825
{\an2}All right!
745
00:32:32,033 --> 00:32:33,034
{\an2}-That was amazing!
-Over here, over here!
746
00:32:33,243 --> 00:32:35,328
{\an2}-You did it!
-Yeah, of course I did. I'm--
747
00:32:35,537 --> 00:32:38,081
{\an2}Sorry, not you.
We're talking to Commissioner Gordon.
748
00:32:38,248 --> 00:32:40,208
{\an2}-Well, it was a team effort.
-I got this, Babs.
749
00:32:40,375 --> 00:32:41,751
{\an2}Commissioner, how do you feel?
750
00:32:41,918 --> 00:32:44,004
{\an2}Amazing! This is a great first day.
751
00:32:44,171 --> 00:32:45,338
{\an2}[scoffs] Okay.
752
00:32:45,505 --> 00:32:46,715
{\an2}-Question for Batman.
-Shoot.
753
00:32:46,882 --> 00:32:48,258
{\an2}What are you gonna do
with the rest of your life?
754
00:32:48,425 --> 00:32:49,968
{\an2}What do you mean,
the rest of my life?
755
00:32:50,135 --> 00:32:53,013
{\an2}We don't need a vigilante crime fighter
now that there's no more crime.
756
00:32:53,180 --> 00:32:54,222
{\an2}Uh, yes, you do.
757
00:32:54,389 --> 00:32:56,808
{\an2}You can spend some quality time
with your family.
758
00:32:57,767 --> 00:32:58,768
{\an2}My...
759
00:33:03,482 --> 00:33:05,942
{\an2}Okay, Batman. We'll take it from here.
760
00:33:06,109 --> 00:33:07,235
{\an2}All right, listen up.
761
00:33:07,402 --> 00:33:09,696
{\an2}All of you have
the right to remain silent.
762
00:33:09,863 --> 00:33:10,906
{\an2}Let's roll out!
763
00:33:11,072 --> 00:33:12,073
{\an2}[Penguin] Toodle-oo, Batman!
764
00:33:12,240 --> 00:33:13,575
{\an2}[Bane] Bye, Batman.
[Poison Ivy] Au revoir, Batman.
765
00:33:13,742 --> 00:33:14,743
{\an2}[Clayface] Bye, Batman.
766
00:33:14,910 --> 00:33:16,244
{\an2}[Joker] Bye, Batman!
767
00:33:16,411 --> 00:33:19,039
{\an2}[sad music playing]
768
00:33:22,667 --> 00:33:24,920
{\an2}Today is a victory
769
00:33:25,086 --> 00:33:28,256
{\an2}for the citizens of Gotham City!
770
00:33:29,090 --> 00:33:32,093
{\an2}[all chanting] No more crime!
No more crime! No more crime!
771
00:33:32,260 --> 00:33:35,263
{\an2}No more crime! No more crime!
No more crime!
772
00:33:35,430 --> 00:33:38,725
{\an2}No more crime! No more crime!
No more crime!
773
00:33:42,604 --> 00:33:43,772
{\an2}Is everything okay, sir?
774
00:33:43,939 --> 00:33:45,607
{\an2}You've barely touched
your lobster thermidor.
775
00:33:45,774 --> 00:33:48,777
{\an2}I don't have time to eat
lobster thermidor right now! [yells]
776
00:33:52,447 --> 00:33:53,782
{\an2}[Joker] Warrior two.
777
00:33:53,949 --> 00:33:56,826
{\an2}Pigeon pose. Tree pose.
778
00:34:00,997 --> 00:34:02,123
{\an2}Tree pose.
779
00:34:02,290 --> 00:34:03,333
{\an2}Hey, Batman!
780
00:34:03,500 --> 00:34:04,668
{\an2}Barbara!
781
00:34:04,834 --> 00:34:05,835
{\an2}What are you doing?
782
00:34:06,002 --> 00:34:07,796
{\an2}Nothing. I have a very full life.
783
00:34:07,963 --> 00:34:10,465
{\an2}No, I mean, what are you doing here?
784
00:34:10,632 --> 00:34:13,802
{\an2}Surveillance. On the Joker.
785
00:34:13,969 --> 00:34:16,888
{\an2}Batman, we both know
the Joker's up to something.
786
00:34:17,055 --> 00:34:19,724
{\an2}Well, then we can't just let him
run around loose in a prison.
787
00:34:19,891 --> 00:34:21,142
{\an2}He's not loose.
788
00:34:21,309 --> 00:34:23,478
{\an2}He has to go someplace outside the law.
789
00:34:23,645 --> 00:34:25,313
{\an2}-Outside the law?
-Yeah.
790
00:34:25,522 --> 00:34:27,482
{\an2}Somewhere like, uh...
791
00:34:27,649 --> 00:34:30,735
{\an2}Hi, there. I'm here
from Phantom's Own Laundry.
792
00:34:30,902 --> 00:34:32,862
{\an2}Here to take that bad stuff
off your hands.
793
00:34:33,029 --> 00:34:35,657
{\an2}Wait, that's it! The Phantom Zone.
794
00:34:35,824 --> 00:34:37,659
{\an2}The Phantom Zone? No way!
795
00:34:37,826 --> 00:34:41,413
{\an2}That is super illegal
and way outside our jurisdiction.
796
00:34:41,788 --> 00:34:45,041
{\an2}So, why don't you and I work together
797
00:34:45,208 --> 00:34:47,711
{\an2}inside the law,
to figure out what he's up to?
798
00:34:47,877 --> 00:34:50,672
{\an2}Batman works alone.
That's my motto. Copyright Batman.
799
00:34:50,839 --> 00:34:51,840
{\an2}[sighs]
800
00:34:52,007 --> 00:34:56,094
{\an2}Batman, there are no more vigilantes
allowed in Gotham City.
801
00:34:56,261 --> 00:34:57,721
{\an2}Okay. Totally got it.
802
00:34:57,887 --> 00:35:01,349
{\an2}Then I have to go into
double-secret super vigilante mode.
803
00:35:01,891 --> 00:35:03,893
{\an2}You said that out loud.
804
00:35:04,519 --> 00:35:07,397
{\an2}I know that she said I said that out loud,
but there's no way I did.
805
00:35:07,564 --> 00:35:10,525
{\an2}She has no idea what's going on
in my super-mind.
806
00:35:10,692 --> 00:35:12,360
{\an2}-Super-mind?
-[gasps]
807
00:35:12,611 --> 00:35:13,945
{\an2}Smoke bomb!
808
00:35:18,867 --> 00:35:21,703
{\an2}Computer, how do I put the Joker
in the Phantom Zone?
809
00:35:21,870 --> 00:35:23,955
{\an2}Quickest route, no freeways.
810
00:35:27,167 --> 00:35:28,460
{\an2}'Puter, do you hear me?
811
00:35:28,668 --> 00:35:30,754
{\an2}[dramatic music plays]
812
00:35:30,962 --> 00:35:32,631
{\an2}Hello, Master Bruce.
813
00:35:32,797 --> 00:35:35,342
{\an2}Alfred, there's something wrong
with the Batcomputer. Watch this.
814
00:35:35,508 --> 00:35:37,218
{\an2}'Puter. Nothing.
815
00:35:37,385 --> 00:35:39,137
{\an2}'Puter. Do you see what I'm saying?
816
00:35:39,304 --> 00:35:40,513
{\an2}There's nothing wrong with it, sir.
817
00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:43,266
{\an2}I have just taken away
your computer privileges.
818
00:35:46,186 --> 00:35:47,979
{\an2}The parental lock? You can't do that.
819
00:35:48,146 --> 00:35:50,357
{\an2}Oh, I can. I've been reading
820
00:35:50,523 --> 00:35:52,901
{\an2}Setting Limitsfor Your Out-of-Control Child.
821
00:35:53,068 --> 00:35:54,152
{\an2}You know what? Doesn't matter,
822
00:35:54,319 --> 00:35:55,987
{\an2}'cause I have
a double-secret super password
823
00:35:56,154 --> 00:35:57,656
{\an2}that unlocks the parental lock.
824
00:35:57,822 --> 00:36:01,117
{\an2}You mean, "Alfred da Butt-ler,"
with two T's?
825
00:36:01,326 --> 00:36:02,327
{\an2}[laughs]
826
00:36:02,577 --> 00:36:04,954
{\an2}Sir, it's time for you
to stop this unhealthy behavior.
827
00:36:05,121 --> 00:36:06,581
{\an2}No, it's not.
828
00:36:06,748 --> 00:36:08,291
{\an2}You need to take responsibility
for your life.
829
00:36:08,458 --> 00:36:09,918
{\an2}Not right now, I don't.
830
00:36:10,085 --> 00:36:12,712
{\an2}And it starts by raising your son.
831
00:36:15,965 --> 00:36:16,966
{\an2}I'm sorry.
832
00:36:17,133 --> 00:36:19,928
{\an2}I literally have no idea
what you're talking about.
833
00:36:20,095 --> 00:36:23,056
{\an2}The young orphan you adopted
at the gala. Remember?
834
00:36:23,765 --> 00:36:24,933
{\an2}[Richard whooping]
835
00:36:25,350 --> 00:36:28,353
{\an2}Wow! Stairs. Whee!
836
00:36:28,770 --> 00:36:30,980
{\an2}He's been living here for the past week.
837
00:36:31,147 --> 00:36:33,775
{\an2}Hello, table! Boom!
838
00:36:34,025 --> 00:36:37,570
{\an2}[Alfred] And I must say,
I've grown rather fond of the young lad.
839
00:36:37,737 --> 00:36:39,656
{\an2}[whispers] Hello, secret camera.
840
00:36:39,823 --> 00:36:40,865
{\an2}[Alfred] You should get to know him.
841
00:36:41,032 --> 00:36:42,575
{\an2}[singing] We are family
842
00:36:42,742 --> 00:36:45,286
{\an2}-You and he have a lot in common.
-En garde.
843
00:36:47,205 --> 00:36:48,957
{\an2}Hello, family photos.
844
00:36:49,124 --> 00:36:51,543
{\an2}[Alfred] He lost his parentsat a very young age.
845
00:36:53,169 --> 00:36:54,921
{\an2}I've always wanted one of those.
846
00:36:57,090 --> 00:37:01,052
{\an2}Doesn't he deserve a chance for someone
to take him under their wing,
847
00:37:02,095 --> 00:37:05,306
{\an2}as I took you under mine?
848
00:37:08,435 --> 00:37:11,146
{\an2}Alfred, you've been watching
way too many Lifetime movies
849
00:37:11,312 --> 00:37:12,313
{\an2}and drinking chardonnay.
850
00:37:12,480 --> 00:37:14,065
{\an2}-It's Pinot grigio, sir.
-Whatever it is.
851
00:37:14,232 --> 00:37:16,276
{\an2}Listen, you don't have a family.
852
00:37:16,484 --> 00:37:17,861
{\an2}You're satisfied serving me.
853
00:37:18,528 --> 00:37:20,864
{\an2}So what do you know about
having a surrogate son?
854
00:37:21,448 --> 00:37:23,074
{\an2}Now, I'm gonna go fight crime
855
00:37:23,241 --> 00:37:26,161
{\an2}while you put that kid on the next jet
to the orphanage. Got it?
856
00:37:26,745 --> 00:37:27,746
{\an2}[sighs]
857
00:37:27,996 --> 00:37:29,122
{\an2}As you wish, sir.
858
00:37:29,456 --> 00:37:30,623
{\an2}[whistling]
859
00:37:30,832 --> 00:37:32,250
{\an2}Whoops-a-daisy.
860
00:37:32,584 --> 00:37:33,585
{\an2}[Richard gasps]
861
00:37:33,793 --> 00:37:34,878
{\an2}[Batman] Wait, what are you doing?
862
00:37:35,044 --> 00:37:36,045
{\an2}Dusting.
863
00:37:36,212 --> 00:37:37,255
{\an2}You can't let him into the Batcave!
864
00:37:37,422 --> 00:37:40,550
{\an2}I'm not. I'm letting him into your life
865
00:37:40,759 --> 00:37:42,260
{\an2}via the Batcave.
866
00:37:42,469 --> 00:37:44,387
{\an2}[whoops]
867
00:37:45,805 --> 00:37:46,890
{\an2}[gasps]
868
00:37:52,270 --> 00:37:53,271
{\an2}What?
869
00:37:53,521 --> 00:37:54,647
{\an2}[gasping]
870
00:37:54,898 --> 00:37:56,941
{\an2}-It's the Batcave!
-[bats squeaking]
871
00:37:57,358 --> 00:37:59,861
{\an2}Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh.
872
00:38:00,028 --> 00:38:02,030
{\an2}Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh.
873
00:38:02,197 --> 00:38:04,741
{\an2}Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh.
874
00:38:04,949 --> 00:38:06,868
{\an2}[whooping]
875
00:38:07,368 --> 00:38:09,537
{\an2}[gasps] Batman! Whoa!
876
00:38:09,746 --> 00:38:10,914
{\an2}You're darn right, "Whoa."
877
00:38:11,080 --> 00:38:13,374
{\an2}Wait, does Batman live
in Bruce Wayne's basement?
878
00:38:13,541 --> 00:38:15,710
{\an2}No. Bruce Wayne lives in Batman's attic.
879
00:38:15,877 --> 00:38:18,004
{\an2}-We can have sleepovers every night!
-No, we can't.
880
00:38:18,171 --> 00:38:20,256
{\an2}-Wow! Look, it's the Bat-Sub!
-Wait, don't touch that!
881
00:38:20,423 --> 00:38:21,633
{\an2}Over there, it's the Bat-Space shuttle.
882
00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:22,801
{\an2}Please, keep your hands off that.
883
00:38:22,967 --> 00:38:24,427
{\an2}-Look, it's the Bat-Zeppelin!
-Don't touch that either!
884
00:38:24,594 --> 00:38:25,595
{\an2}-It's the Bat-Train!
-No!
885
00:38:25,762 --> 00:38:26,888
{\an2}-It's the Bat-Kayak.
-No!
886
00:38:27,055 --> 00:38:28,097
{\an2}-It's the Bat-Dune buggy.
-No!
887
00:38:28,264 --> 00:38:30,058
{\an2}It's the Bat shark repellent?
888
00:38:31,893 --> 00:38:34,896
{\an2}Uh, actually, you can touch that.
It's completely useless.
889
00:38:35,104 --> 00:38:36,439
{\an2}Whoa! Thanks, Batman!
890
00:38:36,648 --> 00:38:38,817
{\an2}Please, stand over there.
891
00:38:38,983 --> 00:38:41,528
{\an2}And don't touch, look at, or do anything
892
00:38:41,694 --> 00:38:43,404
{\an2}for the remaining moments
you have in my presence.
893
00:38:43,571 --> 00:38:44,614
{\an2}Okay, cool.
894
00:38:44,781 --> 00:38:46,241
{\an2}-Computer.
-Go ahead.
895
00:38:46,407 --> 00:38:48,535
{\an2}How do I put the Joker
in the Phantom Zone?
896
00:38:48,701 --> 00:38:50,745
{\an2}[Puter]
Joker can only be put in the Phantom Zone
897
00:38:50,912 --> 00:38:52,497
{\an2}using the Phantom Zone Projector.
898
00:38:52,664 --> 00:38:53,915
{\an2}Current location,
899
00:38:54,082 --> 00:38:56,125
{\an2}Superman's Fortress of Solitude
900
00:38:56,292 --> 00:38:58,294
{\an2}inside the Atomic Cauldron.
901
00:38:58,461 --> 00:39:02,882
{\an2}However, only a person that isn'tshredded, ripped, or extremely swoll
902
00:39:03,049 --> 00:39:04,259
{\an2}can enter the cauldron.
903
00:39:04,425 --> 00:39:06,135
{\an2}Ugh, I'm way too buff.
904
00:39:06,302 --> 00:39:08,054
{\an2}[Puter] You also have beautiful abs, sir.
905
00:39:08,221 --> 00:39:09,597
{\an2}That's my cross to bear.
906
00:39:09,764 --> 00:39:11,891
{\an2}Additionally, once inside the cauldron,
907
00:39:12,058 --> 00:39:14,644
{\an2}multiple Kryptoniandefense systems engage,
908
00:39:14,811 --> 00:39:17,105
{\an2}including the Acid Moat,Ring of Napalm,
909
00:39:17,272 --> 00:39:18,565
{\an2}and the Jaws of Death.
910
00:39:18,731 --> 00:39:22,193
{\an2}Chance of total mission failure is 110%.
911
00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:24,612
{\an2}Those are not great odds.
912
00:39:24,779 --> 00:39:25,780
{\an2}Wait a minute.
913
00:39:25,947 --> 00:39:27,115
{\an2}-Hey, kid.
-Yes, sir?
914
00:39:27,282 --> 00:39:28,992
{\an2}-You're super nimble, right?
-I sure am!
915
00:39:29,158 --> 00:39:30,243
{\an2}-And small?
-Very.
916
00:39:30,410 --> 00:39:32,078
{\an2}-And quiet?
-[whispering] When I desire to be.
917
00:39:32,245 --> 00:39:34,122
{\an2}And 110% expendable?
918
00:39:34,289 --> 00:39:36,082
{\an2}I don't know what that means,
but okay.
919
00:39:36,249 --> 00:39:37,834
{\an2}Great. Follow me.
920
00:39:38,001 --> 00:39:40,837
{\an2}We are gonna steal
the Phantom Zone Projector from Superman.
921
00:39:41,004 --> 00:39:42,005
{\an2}-Steal?
-Yeah.
922
00:39:42,171 --> 00:39:43,756
{\an2}We have to right a wrong.
923
00:39:43,923 --> 00:39:46,843
{\an2}And, sometimes, in order to right a wrong,
you have to do a wrong-right.
924
00:39:47,010 --> 00:39:48,011
{\an2}Gandhi said that.
925
00:39:48,177 --> 00:39:49,429
{\an2}Are we sure Gandhi said that?
926
00:39:49,596 --> 00:39:51,264
{\an2}-I'm paraphrasing.
-Cool!
927
00:39:51,431 --> 00:39:53,433
{\an2}[Puter] Preparing Fortress of Solitudeinfiltration gear.
928
00:39:53,600 --> 00:39:54,934
{\an2}Wow! Look at all these!
929
00:39:55,101 --> 00:39:56,477
{\an2}Do I get a costume for the mission, too?
930
00:39:56,644 --> 00:39:59,147
{\an2}I got a feeling that you'll just look
like a kid on Halloween.
931
00:39:59,355 --> 00:40:00,356
{\an2}Don't you think?
932
00:40:00,565 --> 00:40:01,608
{\an2}Don't touch that.
933
00:40:01,816 --> 00:40:03,818
{\an2}-[pop music playing]
-Whoo-hoo!
934
00:40:03,985 --> 00:40:05,028
{\an2}[Puter] El Mariachi.
[Richard] I like that one!
935
00:40:05,194 --> 00:40:06,571
{\an2}-That one is culturally insensitive.
-Night Terror.
936
00:40:06,738 --> 00:40:07,739
{\an2}-That one!
-[Batman] No way.
937
00:40:07,906 --> 00:40:08,948
{\an2}-This one?
-[Puter] Death Merchant.
938
00:40:09,115 --> 00:40:10,116
{\an2}-[Batman] No.
-I'm okay.
939
00:40:10,283 --> 00:40:11,367
{\an2}-This one.
-[Puter] Fire Starter.
940
00:40:11,534 --> 00:40:12,952
{\an2}-This one.
-Clawed Reigns.
941
00:40:13,119 --> 00:40:14,454
{\an2}-Excali-Bat.
-This one?
942
00:40:14,621 --> 00:40:15,955
{\an2}-Silent but Deadly.
-[Batman] Nope.
943
00:40:16,122 --> 00:40:17,707
{\an2}-Bat-ryshnikov.
-[whooping]
944
00:40:17,874 --> 00:40:18,958
{\an2}How do we feel about this one?
945
00:40:19,125 --> 00:40:21,044
{\an2}Dress-up parties are for grown-ups only.
946
00:40:21,210 --> 00:40:22,378
{\an2}Wait. What's that one there?
947
00:40:22,545 --> 00:40:23,755
{\an2}[Batman] That one was for
the assignment called
948
00:40:23,963 --> 00:40:25,173
{\an2}The Jamaican Caper.
949
00:40:25,340 --> 00:40:27,342
{\an2}The locals called me Reggae Man.
950
00:40:27,508 --> 00:40:28,635
{\an2}I love it!
951
00:40:28,801 --> 00:40:30,637
{\an2}Ah! Feels like I was poured into this.
952
00:40:30,803 --> 00:40:31,846
{\an2}My only trouble is,
953
00:40:32,472 --> 00:40:34,015
{\an2}these pants are just a little tight.
954
00:40:34,182 --> 00:40:36,351
{\an2}I don't know if I could throw a kick
or jump in them.
955
00:40:36,517 --> 00:40:39,187
{\an2}I got an idea. Rip! That's better!
956
00:40:39,354 --> 00:40:40,730
{\an2}Now I'm free, now I'm moving.
957
00:40:40,897 --> 00:40:42,899
{\an2}Come on, Batman. Let's get grooving!
958
00:40:43,149 --> 00:40:45,109
{\an2}I can only look you
in the eyes right now.
959
00:40:45,276 --> 00:40:47,737
{\an2}-Sir, what are you doing?
-What do you mean?
960
00:40:47,987 --> 00:40:50,114
{\an2}Why is Master Dick dressed like that?
961
00:40:50,323 --> 00:40:53,868
{\an2}How dare you tell me
how to parent my kid I just met?
962
00:40:54,035 --> 00:40:55,078
{\an2}To the Batmobile!
963
00:40:55,244 --> 00:40:56,412
{\an2}Hot-diggity-dog!
964
00:40:59,207 --> 00:41:01,042
{\an2}[Puter] Vehicle rotisserie engaged.
965
00:41:01,626 --> 00:41:03,795
{\an2}Retrieving the Speedwagon.
966
00:41:04,796 --> 00:41:06,381
{\an2}Atomic batteries to power.
967
00:41:06,589 --> 00:41:07,632
{\an2}Turbines to speed.
968
00:41:08,049 --> 00:41:09,634
{\an2}Hey, kid. Let's go.
969
00:41:10,259 --> 00:41:11,928
{\an2}-Oh, shoot!
-What?
970
00:41:12,637 --> 00:41:14,555
{\an2}I probably shouldn't leave
971
00:41:14,722 --> 00:41:18,393
{\an2}until I get the thumbs up
from my new old man, Bruce Wayne.
972
00:41:20,019 --> 00:41:22,230
{\an2}Uh, yeah. Here's the thing.
973
00:41:24,065 --> 00:41:26,484
{\an2}Bruno and I decided
974
00:41:26,651 --> 00:41:28,569
{\an2}to share custody of you.
975
00:41:28,736 --> 00:41:30,697
{\an2}So I get a say
976
00:41:30,863 --> 00:41:32,991
{\an2}and you're mission approved.
977
00:41:33,157 --> 00:41:35,243
{\an2}No way! Is this really happening?
978
00:41:35,410 --> 00:41:36,494
{\an2}Yeah.
979
00:41:36,744 --> 00:41:37,787
{\an2}Whoo-hoo!
980
00:41:37,996 --> 00:41:39,414
{\an2}A month ago, I had no dads.
981
00:41:39,580 --> 00:41:41,582
{\an2}Then I had one dad. Now I have two dads!
982
00:41:41,749 --> 00:41:43,876
{\an2}-And one of them is Batman!
-Yeah.
983
00:41:44,043 --> 00:41:45,378
{\an2}[singing] It's raining dads!
984
00:41:45,545 --> 00:41:46,546
{\an2}So,
985
00:41:46,713 --> 00:41:48,756
{\an2}are you ready to follow Batman
986
00:41:48,923 --> 00:41:51,843
{\an2}and maybe learn a few
life lessons along the way?
987
00:41:52,010 --> 00:41:53,428
{\an2}I sure am, Dad Two!
988
00:41:53,594 --> 00:41:55,346
{\an2}But first, where's the seatbelt?
989
00:41:55,513 --> 00:41:57,056
{\an2}The first lesson is,
990
00:41:57,223 --> 00:41:59,100
{\an2}life doesn't give you seatbelts!
991
00:41:59,267 --> 00:42:01,269
{\an2}-Let's go!
-Whoo-hoo!
992
00:42:01,561 --> 00:42:02,770
{\an2}Yes!
993
00:42:02,979 --> 00:42:04,105
{\an2}[whooping]
994
00:42:04,439 --> 00:42:06,065
{\an2}Faster, Dad! Faster!
995
00:42:07,025 --> 00:42:08,026
{\an2}-Whoo!
-Yeah!
996
00:42:08,192 --> 00:42:09,193
{\an2}-Whoo!
-Yeah!
997
00:42:09,360 --> 00:42:10,403
{\an2}[Richard] Yes, yes, yes!
998
00:42:10,611 --> 00:42:11,946
{\an2}-[brakes screech]
-[groans]
999
00:42:12,155 --> 00:42:14,657
{\an2}Oh! Oh, my goodness.
I am so sorry.
1000
00:42:14,824 --> 00:42:16,617
{\an2}Get back up in that seat. There you go.
1001
00:42:16,784 --> 00:42:18,786
{\an2}Hey, listen.
As soon as I get back to the Batcave,
1002
00:42:18,953 --> 00:42:21,456
{\an2}I'll make sure that
Alfred puts seatbelts on there, okay?
1003
00:42:21,622 --> 00:42:24,625
{\an2}But for the time being,
I'm just gonna put my arm right here.
1004
00:42:24,792 --> 00:42:27,920
{\an2}And we're just gonna
gently ease out of here.
1005
00:42:28,087 --> 00:42:30,048
{\an2}And here we go.
1006
00:42:42,935 --> 00:42:45,188
{\an8}Okay. Like all superheroes,
1007
00:42:45,354 --> 00:42:47,899
{\an2}Superman has zero friends,
and he spends most of his time
1008
00:42:48,066 --> 00:42:51,944
{\an2}basking in sweet, sweet isolation,
here at his alone palace.
1009
00:42:52,236 --> 00:42:53,613
{\an2}So, I'll keep him busy
1010
00:42:53,780 --> 00:42:56,574
{\an2}while you sneak into that vent
and get the Projector. Got it?
1011
00:42:56,741 --> 00:42:58,576
{\an2}Copy that! Oh, here's an idea.
I could also--
1012
00:42:58,743 --> 00:42:59,744
{\an2}Whoa, whoa.
Don't even finish that thought.
1013
00:42:59,911 --> 00:43:02,830
{\an8}See this counter?
These are all the good ideas Batman has.
1014
00:43:03,247 --> 00:43:05,875
{\an8}And no one else has ever had
any good ideas. So don't even try.
1015
00:43:06,042 --> 00:43:07,627
{\an2}-Your super power...
-[gasps]
1016
00:43:07,835 --> 00:43:10,505
{\an2}Is excellent listening
and execution of my ideas.
1017
00:43:10,671 --> 00:43:12,423
{\an2}-Let's try it out.
-Cool!
1018
00:43:12,590 --> 00:43:14,425
{\an2}Drop to the ground. Do a backflip.
1019
00:43:14,592 --> 00:43:16,135
{\an2}Do a front flip. Triple axel.
1020
00:43:16,302 --> 00:43:18,638
{\an2}Plié. Relevé. Jeté.
Pythagorean theorem.
1021
00:43:18,805 --> 00:43:20,014
{\an2}A squared plus B squared equals C squared.
1022
00:43:20,181 --> 00:43:21,182
{\an2}Physicalize it!
1023
00:43:21,349 --> 00:43:23,434
{\an2}A squared plus B squared
1024
00:43:23,601 --> 00:43:25,353
{\an2}equals C squared.
1025
00:43:25,603 --> 00:43:26,604
{\an2}-How'd I do, Dad?
-Mediocre.
1026
00:43:26,771 --> 00:43:27,772
{\an2}Yes!
1027
00:43:27,939 --> 00:43:29,690
{\an2}And don't call me "Dad."
Now, begin mission.
1028
00:43:29,857 --> 00:43:30,858
{\an2}Yes, Papa.
1029
00:43:31,025 --> 00:43:33,277
{\an2}"Papa" falls into the "Dad" category.
1030
00:43:36,489 --> 00:43:37,990
{\an2}[Richard grunting]
1031
00:43:45,706 --> 00:43:47,708
{\an2}[Superman theme playing]
1032
00:43:51,170 --> 00:43:52,338
{\an2}-'Sup, Supes?
-[dance music playing]
1033
00:43:52,505 --> 00:43:54,966
{\an2}[laughs] Wow. It's Batman.
1034
00:43:55,133 --> 00:43:57,009
{\an2}And he's at my house.
1035
00:43:57,176 --> 00:43:58,219
{\an2}Right now.
1036
00:43:58,427 --> 00:43:59,762
{\an2}What are you doing here?
1037
00:43:59,929 --> 00:44:02,890
{\an2}Don't worry about it, dawg.
I'm not here to throw down or anything.
1038
00:44:03,057 --> 00:44:04,600
{\an2}Uh, no, I would crush you.
1039
00:44:04,851 --> 00:44:07,353
{\an2}[scoffs] Okay. Sure, sure, sure.
1040
00:44:07,520 --> 00:44:09,313
{\an2}Hey, listen. Thank me later,
1041
00:44:09,480 --> 00:44:11,065
{\an2}but I just happened to be in the hood.
1042
00:44:11,232 --> 00:44:14,068
{\an2}And I figured that you could
probably use the...
1043
00:44:16,529 --> 00:44:18,573
{\an2}-[music stops]
-Company.
1044
00:44:19,073 --> 00:44:20,241
{\an2}[Flash coughs]
1045
00:44:20,491 --> 00:44:22,243
{\an2}Wait a minute.
1046
00:44:22,660 --> 00:44:24,328
{\an2}Are you... Are you having
1047
00:44:24,579 --> 00:44:28,416
{\an2}the "57th Annual Justice
League Anniversary Party"
1048
00:44:28,666 --> 00:44:30,835
{\an2}-without me?
-[mouthing] No.
1049
00:44:31,002 --> 00:44:32,628
{\an2}[all] No! No! No!
1050
00:44:32,795 --> 00:44:35,548
{\an2}No! There must have been
some mistake with the email.
1051
00:44:35,715 --> 00:44:36,757
{\an2}That's crazy, man.
1052
00:44:36,924 --> 00:44:39,886
{\an2}Totally! Yes, email mistakes
happen all the time.
1053
00:44:40,052 --> 00:44:42,346
{\an2}Sometimes I don't get
Superman's emails for
1054
00:44:43,097 --> 00:44:44,098
{\an2}years.
1055
00:44:44,265 --> 00:44:45,766
{\an2}Great point, G.L. Great point.
1056
00:44:45,933 --> 00:44:47,435
{\an2}All right.
Well, that clears up everything, right?
1057
00:44:47,602 --> 00:44:48,603
{\an2}Enjoy the party, bro.
1058
00:44:48,769 --> 00:44:50,938
{\an2}Hit it, DJ Wonder Dog.
1059
00:44:51,105 --> 00:44:52,398
{\an2}-[barks]
-[dance music playing]
1060
00:44:52,857 --> 00:44:54,442
{\an2}[man singing]
I'm Superman at the super party
1061
00:44:54,650 --> 00:44:56,152
{\an2}I'm Superman at the super party
1062
00:44:56,319 --> 00:44:57,320
{\an2}Hey-hey
1063
00:44:58,446 --> 00:45:00,364
{\an2}Hey, Batman.
Do you wanna take a quick pic?
1064
00:45:00,531 --> 00:45:01,866
{\an2}Sure. Where do you want me?
1065
00:45:02,033 --> 00:45:03,034
{\an2}Right there is perfect.
1066
00:45:03,200 --> 00:45:04,285
{\an2}-Here's the camera.
-Oh.
1067
00:45:04,702 --> 00:45:06,662
{\an2}Okay, party people, get together.
1068
00:45:06,829 --> 00:45:08,122
{\an2}Yeah. Everybody say--
1069
00:45:08,289 --> 00:45:10,124
{\an2}-[all] Super Friends!
-[camera clicks]
1070
00:45:10,291 --> 00:45:11,667
{\an2}Let me see it! Let me see!
1071
00:45:11,834 --> 00:45:13,419
{\an2}Classic! We got everyone.
1072
00:45:14,045 --> 00:45:15,504
{\an2}Yeah, everyone.
1073
00:45:15,671 --> 00:45:16,797
{\an2}[Flash] Thanks, Batman.
1074
00:45:16,964 --> 00:45:19,592
{\an2}Yeah, no problem. I did, like, a burst.
1075
00:45:19,800 --> 00:45:21,761
{\an2}[Flash] This party is the bomb!
1076
00:45:21,928 --> 00:45:25,306
{\an2}Look at me! More like
Martian Dance Hunter, am I right?
1077
00:45:25,556 --> 00:45:26,557
{\an2}[all laughing]
1078
00:45:26,974 --> 00:45:28,267
{\an2}'Puter, call kid.
1079
00:45:29,018 --> 00:45:30,019
{\an2}Bat-Dad?
1080
00:45:30,436 --> 00:45:31,437
{\an2}How's it going?
1081
00:45:31,604 --> 00:45:33,648
{\an2}'Cause everything is
going great down here.
1082
00:45:33,814 --> 00:45:34,815
{\an2}I can see the target.
1083
00:45:34,982 --> 00:45:36,233
{\an2}But there's some kind of
laser energy thing
1084
00:45:36,400 --> 00:45:37,485
{\an2}that I can't get through.
1085
00:45:37,652 --> 00:45:39,445
{\an2}Okay. I'll see if I can shut it off.
1086
00:45:39,612 --> 00:45:41,530
{\an2}But I'm gonna have to make up
an excuse to leave this party
1087
00:45:41,697 --> 00:45:43,199
{\an2}without anyone noticing.
1088
00:45:44,659 --> 00:45:45,701
{\an2}Bye.
1089
00:45:47,078 --> 00:45:48,162
{\an2}Kid, tell me when it's off, all right?
1090
00:45:48,329 --> 00:45:49,330
{\an2}-Now?
-No.
1091
00:45:49,497 --> 00:45:50,539
{\an2}-Now?
-No.
1092
00:45:50,706 --> 00:45:51,749
{\an2}-Now?
-Not quite.
1093
00:45:51,916 --> 00:45:52,917
{\an2}-Now?
-No.
1094
00:45:53,084 --> 00:45:54,168
{\an2}-My son...-No.
1095
00:45:54,335 --> 00:45:56,170
{\an2}These irreplaceable crystalscontain all my knowledge,
1096
00:45:56,337 --> 00:45:58,255
{\an2}which I now pass on to...
1097
00:45:58,422 --> 00:46:00,466
{\an2}Darn it. It's gotta be one of these.
Is this the one?
1098
00:46:01,384 --> 00:46:03,260
{\an2}O.M. gosh! You did it, Padre!
It's off!
1099
00:46:03,427 --> 00:46:04,428
{\an2}Okay.
1100
00:46:04,595 --> 00:46:06,222
{\an2}Now you gotta make your way
to the Atomic Cauldron
1101
00:46:06,389 --> 00:46:08,057
{\an2}and get that Phantom Zone Projector.
1102
00:46:08,265 --> 00:46:10,226
{\an2}-Do exactly as I say.
-10-4!
1103
00:46:10,393 --> 00:46:11,560
{\an2}Okay. Jump!
1104
00:46:13,312 --> 00:46:15,147
{\an2}Do a front flip. Do a backflip.
1105
00:46:16,482 --> 00:46:18,609
{\an2}Run, run, run. Drop.
1106
00:46:18,776 --> 00:46:20,152
{\an2}That's excellent listening.
1107
00:46:20,319 --> 00:46:21,320
{\an2}Shimmy.
1108
00:46:21,487 --> 00:46:23,489
{\an2}Strafe-left. Strafe-right.
1109
00:46:23,656 --> 00:46:24,699
{\an2}Avoid.
1110
00:46:24,865 --> 00:46:26,826
{\an2}Hey, I was thinking.
If I'm gonna be a superhero,
1111
00:46:26,993 --> 00:46:30,538
{\an2}and go on awesome superhero missions
like this one, can we use code names?
1112
00:46:31,831 --> 00:46:32,832
{\an2}Mine can be Robin.
1113
00:46:32,999 --> 00:46:34,667
{\an2}-I'm sorry, say that again?
-Robin!
1114
00:46:34,834 --> 00:46:37,420
{\an2}As in the small, Midwestern frail bird?
1115
00:46:37,586 --> 00:46:40,172
{\an2}Yeah, and I already have a catch phrase.Tweet, tweet, on the street.
1116
00:46:40,339 --> 00:46:41,716
{\an2}-Hard pass.
-And a song.
1117
00:46:41,882 --> 00:46:43,300
{\an2}[singing] Fly, Robin, fly
1118
00:46:43,467 --> 00:46:46,012
{\an2}-Harder pass. Now slide!
-[whooping]
1119
00:46:46,178 --> 00:46:47,388
{\an2}Okay, kid. I'm gonna teach you
1120
00:46:47,555 --> 00:46:49,724
{\an2}how to masterbuild your wayinside that thing.
1121
00:46:49,890 --> 00:46:50,891
{\an2}Yay!
1122
00:46:51,058 --> 00:46:53,185
{\an2}Grab those 2x6's, pull out the axle studs,
1123
00:46:53,394 --> 00:46:54,562
{\an2}disconnect the 6x10 plates.
1124
00:46:54,729 --> 00:46:55,730
{\an2}Like this?
1125
00:46:55,938 --> 00:46:57,773
{\an2}Whoa! Unbelievable obeying.
1126
00:46:57,940 --> 00:46:59,066
{\an2}Now, let's ride.
1127
00:46:59,233 --> 00:47:00,401
{\an2}Toes to the nose.
1128
00:47:00,568 --> 00:47:01,819
{\an2}Now you're gleaming the cube.
1129
00:47:01,986 --> 00:47:03,738
{\an2}-Yeah!
-Now, get creative.
1130
00:47:03,904 --> 00:47:06,157
{\an2}Freestyle a little bit.Oh, that's good, kid!
1131
00:47:06,323 --> 00:47:08,367
{\an2}It's like looking in a Bat-mirror.
1132
00:47:08,534 --> 00:47:10,369
{\an2}-Okay. Leap.
-[whooping]
1133
00:47:13,164 --> 00:47:15,041
{\an2}-I've got the Projector, Dad.
-Booyah!
1134
00:47:15,207 --> 00:47:18,085
{\an2}Now do everything we just did backwards.
1135
00:47:18,419 --> 00:47:19,587
{\an2}Oh.
1136
00:47:20,755 --> 00:47:22,673
{\an2}Oh! Here you go, Dad. We did it!
1137
00:47:22,840 --> 00:47:26,052
{\an2}Yeah! Mission accomplished.
That was fun!
1138
00:47:28,304 --> 00:47:31,182
{\an2}You okay, Batman?
You seem the opposite of stern.
1139
00:47:32,016 --> 00:47:33,768
{\an2}Yeah, I'm fine. It's just
1140
00:47:33,934 --> 00:47:36,479
{\an2}watching you out there,
1141
00:47:36,645 --> 00:47:40,107
{\an2}it was like the world wasn't
all darkness anymore.
1142
00:47:41,567 --> 00:47:43,611
{\an2}For a brief moment
1143
00:47:43,778 --> 00:47:46,906
{\an2}I could have sworn I felt something.
1144
00:47:47,073 --> 00:47:49,492
{\an2}[Puter] That feeling is pride, sir.
1145
00:47:50,159 --> 00:47:51,494
{\an2}You're right.
1146
00:47:51,660 --> 00:47:53,329
{\an2}I am super proud.
1147
00:47:53,537 --> 00:47:54,538
{\an2}[gasps]
1148
00:47:55,164 --> 00:47:56,999
{\an2}Of myself.
1149
00:47:57,166 --> 00:48:00,461
{\an2}For being such
a good teacher, obviously.
1150
00:48:00,795 --> 00:48:02,963
{\an2}Yeah, you're a great teacher.
1151
00:48:03,130 --> 00:48:04,131
{\an2}I am?
1152
00:48:04,298 --> 00:48:07,384
{\an2}Yeah! I wanna be just like you
when I grow up, Padre!
1153
00:48:07,551 --> 00:48:09,220
{\an2}Wait, what did you call me?
1154
00:48:10,304 --> 00:48:11,847
{\an2}I called you Padre.
1155
00:48:12,681 --> 00:48:15,434
{\an2}It's Spanish for "Dad." Sorry.
1156
00:48:15,601 --> 00:48:18,979
{\an2}Well, isn't it also a cool Spanish way
to say "buddy?"
1157
00:48:19,146 --> 00:48:21,023
{\an2}Yeah, I could've been
saying it that way.
1158
00:48:21,190 --> 00:48:22,274
{\an2}Then I'll allow it.
1159
00:48:22,441 --> 00:48:23,776
{\an2}Oh, you're such a great padre!
1160
00:48:24,318 --> 00:48:25,319
{\an2}What are you doing?
1161
00:48:25,486 --> 00:48:27,488
{\an2}I'm trying to give you a big old hug.
1162
00:48:27,655 --> 00:48:28,989
{\an2}Thought you were attacking me.
1163
00:48:30,032 --> 00:48:32,660
{\an2}Hey, you up for another
top secret superhero mission
1164
00:48:32,827 --> 00:48:34,078
{\an2}to defeat the Joker?
1165
00:48:34,245 --> 00:48:36,372
{\an2}[Robin] Oh, I am down to stop that clown.
1166
00:48:36,539 --> 00:48:38,833
{\an2}But I don't wanna make
my other dad, Bruce Wayne, angry.
1167
00:48:38,999 --> 00:48:40,334
{\an2}Do you think we'll be done
before my bedtime?
1168
00:48:40,501 --> 00:48:41,502
{\an2}Bedtime?
1169
00:48:41,669 --> 00:48:43,170
{\an2}Batman's life lesson number two.
1170
00:48:43,337 --> 00:48:45,172
{\an2}Vigilantes don't have bedtimes.
1171
00:48:45,339 --> 00:48:46,340
{\an2}Yes!
1172
00:48:46,507 --> 00:48:49,552
{\an2}So, what's the vigilante policy
on cookies?
1173
00:48:49,844 --> 00:48:51,679
{\an2}Unlimited!
1174
00:48:52,847 --> 00:48:56,016
{\an8}All right, kid.
We need to avoid Commissioner Gordon.
1175
00:48:57,184 --> 00:48:58,894
{\an2}So, lesson number three.
1176
00:48:59,520 --> 00:49:00,855
{\an2}When going stealth,
1177
00:49:01,021 --> 00:49:04,942
{\an2}you gotta hide every part of you,
physically and emotionally.
1178
00:49:05,526 --> 00:49:06,569
{\an2}-Got it?
-Yeah!
1179
00:49:06,735 --> 00:49:07,736
{\an2}Already failed.
1180
00:49:07,903 --> 00:49:09,572
{\an2}Now, what I need you to do
1181
00:49:09,780 --> 00:49:13,534
{\an2}is use the naturally dark areas
of your costume,
1182
00:49:13,701 --> 00:49:17,288
{\an2}and integrate into the dark parts
of this environment.
1183
00:49:17,454 --> 00:49:18,539
{\an2}Okay.
1184
00:49:18,706 --> 00:49:20,583
{\an2}-Can you see me?
-Yes.
1185
00:49:20,749 --> 00:49:22,585
{\an2}-How about now?
-Yes.
1186
00:49:22,751 --> 00:49:24,628
{\an2}-What about now? Now?
-Yes.
1187
00:49:24,795 --> 00:49:26,547
{\an2}Yes. You're a goner, kid.
1188
00:49:26,714 --> 00:49:28,549
{\an2}-Batman?
-[gasps] Barbara!
1189
00:49:29,091 --> 00:49:30,801
{\an2}[romantic music playing]
1190
00:49:31,093 --> 00:49:32,970
{\an2}Batman? Batman!
1191
00:49:33,637 --> 00:49:34,889
{\an2}Hey, there. Look at you.
1192
00:49:35,055 --> 00:49:36,515
{\an2}-Who's this?
-Hi, police lady.
1193
00:49:36,724 --> 00:49:38,225
{\an2}-Is that your son?
-Yes, I am.
1194
00:49:38,392 --> 00:49:40,311
{\an2}Is that my son...
No, that's just weird.
1195
00:49:40,477 --> 00:49:41,812
{\an2}It's weirder if it's not your son.
1196
00:49:41,979 --> 00:49:44,231
{\an2}Right. No, I don't...
[stammering]
1197
00:49:44,481 --> 00:49:46,442
{\an2}I'm not in a relationship or anything.
1198
00:49:46,609 --> 00:49:48,235
{\an2}I could have a kid.
1199
00:49:48,736 --> 00:49:50,988
{\an2}I mean, if I met the right lady,
1200
00:49:51,155 --> 00:49:54,158
{\an2}and if she was just standing
right in front of me,
1201
00:49:54,325 --> 00:49:57,411
{\an2}and we looked at each other and thought,
"Hey, let's do this.
1202
00:49:57,578 --> 00:49:59,330
{\an2}Let's be together."
1203
00:49:59,496 --> 00:50:00,956
{\an2}-Batman?
-Yes?
1204
00:50:01,123 --> 00:50:04,084
{\an2}I hope you're back because you've decided
to work together
1205
00:50:04,251 --> 00:50:05,419
{\an2}on the Joker case.
1206
00:50:05,669 --> 00:50:06,712
{\an2}Uh...
1207
00:50:06,921 --> 00:50:09,173
{\an2}Yeah. Absolutely!
1208
00:50:09,381 --> 00:50:10,382
{\an2}Great.
1209
00:50:10,925 --> 00:50:13,510
{\an2}-[door alarm buzzes]
-Ooh. Arkham Asylum.
1210
00:50:13,677 --> 00:50:14,803
{\an2}-So, before we question the Joker...
-Uh-huh.
1211
00:50:14,970 --> 00:50:16,347
{\an2}I'm gonna need you to hand
over all your weapons.
1212
00:50:16,513 --> 00:50:18,265
{\an2}I mean, I don't know if I have anything...
1213
00:50:18,432 --> 00:50:19,475
{\an2}-[scanner beeps]
-Oh!
1214
00:50:19,767 --> 00:50:21,101
{\an2}I just got a couple here. There.
1215
00:50:21,268 --> 00:50:22,353
{\an2}-Is that it?
-Yeah.
1216
00:50:22,519 --> 00:50:23,520
{\an2}-[scanner beeps]
-Oh. Of course.
1217
00:50:23,687 --> 00:50:25,439
{\an2}What about the utility belt?
Anything in your cape?
1218
00:50:25,648 --> 00:50:26,941
{\an2}-[scanner beeping]
-Under your cowl?
1219
00:50:27,107 --> 00:50:28,317
{\an2}And your shoes.
1220
00:50:28,484 --> 00:50:29,485
{\an2}There we go.
1221
00:50:29,652 --> 00:50:31,362
{\an2}Uh... This is really uncomfortable.
1222
00:50:31,528 --> 00:50:33,447
{\an2}Sorry. My shoes are part of my pants.
1223
00:50:33,656 --> 00:50:34,657
{\an2}[alarm blaring]
1224
00:50:34,865 --> 00:50:35,866
{\an2}Oops.
1225
00:50:36,033 --> 00:50:37,243
{\an2}-Batman?
-Yes?
1226
00:50:37,409 --> 00:50:39,119
{\an2}Why is your "not son"
1227
00:50:39,286 --> 00:50:41,789
{\an2}trying to smuggle
the Phantom Zone Projector into Arkham?
1228
00:50:41,956 --> 00:50:44,500
{\an2}What? Hey, kid. What is this?
1229
00:50:44,667 --> 00:50:46,710
{\an2}Batman, give me
the Phantom Zone Projector.
1230
00:50:46,877 --> 00:50:47,878
{\an2}-No.
-Batman!
1231
00:50:48,045 --> 00:50:49,463
{\an2}Give me the Phantom Zone Projector!
Give it to me!
1232
00:50:49,630 --> 00:50:50,923
{\an2}No, no, no! Whoa! Nice.
1233
00:50:51,257 --> 00:50:53,467
{\an2}I studied Brazilian jiu-jitsu
at Harvard for Police.
1234
00:50:53,634 --> 00:50:56,178
{\an2}Oh, yeah? Well, guess who got
a PhD in smoke bombs!
1235
00:50:56,345 --> 00:50:57,388
{\an2}-[coughing]
-Dr. Batman.
1236
00:50:57,554 --> 00:50:58,681
{\an2}[Barbara] Guards! Get them!
1237
00:50:58,973 --> 00:50:59,974
{\an2}Freeze, Batman!
1238
00:51:00,140 --> 00:51:03,227
{\an2}Hey, kid. This is a training exercise.
These guys are my bros.
1239
00:51:03,394 --> 00:51:04,979
{\an2}-Go ahead and take a couple of them out.
-Cool!
1240
00:51:05,145 --> 00:51:06,146
{\an2}[Batman] Hey, Frank.
1241
00:51:06,313 --> 00:51:07,314
{\an2}[Robin] You want a piece of Robin?
1242
00:51:07,481 --> 00:51:09,024
{\an2}[Batman] Barney!
Nice compound fracture!
1243
00:51:09,191 --> 00:51:10,943
{\an2}[Robin] How'd you like a punch, Glen?
1244
00:51:11,902 --> 00:51:12,903
{\an2}Code Red!
1245
00:51:13,070 --> 00:51:14,738
{\an2}I need total security lockdown, now!
1246
00:51:14,989 --> 00:51:16,448
{\an2}[alarm blaring]
1247
00:51:17,700 --> 00:51:18,909
{\an2}Om!
1248
00:51:20,452 --> 00:51:21,704
{\an2}'Sup, Joker?
1249
00:51:21,870 --> 00:51:23,247
{\an2}Namaste, Batman.
1250
00:51:23,414 --> 00:51:24,873
{\an2}-Namaste.
-Gross.
1251
00:51:25,040 --> 00:51:26,500
{\an2}Ooh. Briefs man. Me, too.
1252
00:51:26,667 --> 00:51:28,794
{\an2}Cut the baloney.
Kid, guard the door, will ya?
1253
00:51:28,961 --> 00:51:30,087
{\an2}On it! Take that, Alan!
1254
00:51:30,379 --> 00:51:33,674
{\an2}Huh. Looks like you're going to
a lot of trouble for little old me.
1255
00:51:33,841 --> 00:51:36,010
{\an2}I must be your greatest enemy after all.
1256
00:51:36,176 --> 00:51:37,511
{\an2}Right, Batman?
1257
00:51:37,845 --> 00:51:39,888
{\an2}-I see what you're trying to do.
-And what is that?
1258
00:51:40,055 --> 00:51:42,975
{\an2}You're trying to entrap me
into a relationship.
1259
00:51:43,142 --> 00:51:45,311
{\an2}-Really?
-Yeah, and it's not gonna work.
1260
00:51:45,477 --> 00:51:46,687
{\an2}Oh, yes, it is.
1261
00:51:46,854 --> 00:51:48,856
{\an2}-Because I'm inside your head.
-[blows raspberry]
1262
00:51:49,231 --> 00:51:50,357
{\an2}-No, you're not!
-No, you're not!
1263
00:51:50,691 --> 00:51:51,692
{\an2}-[gasps]
-I knew you'd say that.
1264
00:51:51,859 --> 00:51:53,319
{\an2}-No, you didn't!
-No, you didn't!
1265
00:51:53,485 --> 00:51:55,154
{\an2}-[gasps]
-And I knew you'd say that!
1266
00:51:55,321 --> 00:51:57,448
{\an2}See? We aren't so different, I and you.
1267
00:51:57,614 --> 00:51:59,116
{\an2}-It's, "you and I!"
-It's, "you and I!"
1268
00:51:59,533 --> 00:52:01,952
{\an2}-Argh!
-Admit it. I'm your greatest enemy.
1269
00:52:02,119 --> 00:52:03,454
{\an2}You're not my greatest enemy, Joker.
1270
00:52:03,620 --> 00:52:05,873
{\an2}Okay, then send me to the Phantom Zone.
1271
00:52:06,040 --> 00:52:07,041
{\an2}Fine, I will.
1272
00:52:07,207 --> 00:52:09,752
{\an2}And prove I'm your greatest enemy.
1273
00:52:09,960 --> 00:52:10,961
{\an2}[growls]
1274
00:52:11,170 --> 00:52:12,546
{\an2}Batman, don't do this.
1275
00:52:12,713 --> 00:52:16,216
{\an2}As long as you're in the Phantom Zone,
I'll be saving Gotham City,
1276
00:52:16,383 --> 00:52:18,052
{\an2}and that's all that matters to me.
1277
00:52:18,218 --> 00:52:19,553
{\an2}Goodbye, Joker.
1278
00:52:19,720 --> 00:52:21,638
{\an2}Oh, Batman, thank you!
1279
00:52:21,805 --> 00:52:22,806
{\an2}[Joker laughs]
1280
00:52:24,058 --> 00:52:27,436
{\an2}Yes! That's what I call
saving the city again!
1281
00:52:27,603 --> 00:52:29,313
{\an2}Batman, what are you doing?
1282
00:52:29,480 --> 00:52:30,731
{\an2}I'm Batman-ing.
1283
00:52:30,898 --> 00:52:31,899
{\an2}[rap music playing]
1284
00:52:32,107 --> 00:52:34,026
{\an2}I'm BatmanI'm awesome
1285
00:52:34,193 --> 00:52:35,194
{\an2}I got a nine-pack
1286
00:52:35,361 --> 00:52:36,362
{\an2}Stop it!
1287
00:52:36,737 --> 00:52:38,238
{\an2}Batman, I can't believe you did this.
1288
00:52:38,405 --> 00:52:39,406
{\an2}Hi, police lady.
1289
00:52:39,573 --> 00:52:40,783
{\an2}And even worse,
1290
00:52:40,949 --> 00:52:43,285
{\an2}you've made this kid
into an accessory to your crime.
1291
00:52:44,411 --> 00:52:45,496
{\an2}Sorry, kid.
1292
00:52:45,662 --> 00:52:46,663
{\an2}That's okay, ma'am.
1293
00:52:46,830 --> 00:52:48,749
{\an2}As long as I'm doing a dime
in the big house with my old man,
1294
00:52:48,916 --> 00:52:50,209
{\an2}everything's gonna be A-okay.
1295
00:52:50,376 --> 00:52:52,461
{\an2}Officers, take this Projector
to the evidence room.
1296
00:52:52,628 --> 00:52:54,296
{\an2}-You got it.
-And get this man some pants.
1297
00:52:54,463 --> 00:52:55,506
{\an2}I'm good the way I am.
1298
00:52:55,672 --> 00:52:58,384
{\an2}B Go, why has nobody fist bumped me yet?
1299
00:52:58,842 --> 00:53:02,763
{\an2}[sighs] You know, when I was a kid,
1300
00:53:03,430 --> 00:53:05,933
{\an2}I wanted to be you, Batman.
1301
00:53:06,475 --> 00:53:08,477
{\an2}I wanted to be as strong
1302
00:53:08,644 --> 00:53:11,313
{\an2}and as fast and as smart as Batman.
1303
00:53:12,272 --> 00:53:14,274
{\an2}But you're not who I thought you were.
1304
00:53:14,817 --> 00:53:16,110
{\an2}Uh... What do you mean?
1305
00:53:17,152 --> 00:53:20,447
{\an2}You can't be a hero
if you only care about yourself.
1306
00:53:21,323 --> 00:53:23,283
{\an2}Barbara, I...
1307
00:53:25,536 --> 00:53:26,787
{\an2}I think you're underestimating
1308
00:53:26,954 --> 00:53:29,456
{\an2}the importance of the Joker
being in the Phantom Zone.
1309
00:53:30,165 --> 00:53:32,459
{\an2}Really, it's kind of a stroke
of genius. All the...
1310
00:53:32,626 --> 00:53:33,669
{\an2}Hey, where are you going?
1311
00:53:33,836 --> 00:53:37,339
{\an2}I just put Joker in the one place
he can't do anyone any harm.
1312
00:53:38,632 --> 00:53:39,633
{\an2}[sighs] Yeah.
1313
00:53:40,509 --> 00:53:44,721
{\an2}But what if you just gave Joker
exactly what he wanted?
1314
00:53:50,811 --> 00:53:52,729
{\an2}[ominous music playing]
1315
00:54:09,830 --> 00:54:10,873
{\an2}Oh!
1316
00:54:13,834 --> 00:54:14,835
{\an2}Whoa!
1317
00:54:15,043 --> 00:54:17,463
{\an2}Look at this place!
Am I being too loud?
1318
00:54:17,671 --> 00:54:18,672
{\an2}[cracks knuckles]
1319
00:54:18,839 --> 00:54:20,466
{\an2}-Hi!
-Oh, my gosh!
1320
00:54:20,674 --> 00:54:22,384
{\an2}-[gasping]
-Sorry. I always do that.
1321
00:54:22,551 --> 00:54:23,552
{\an2}How about a warning next time?
1322
00:54:23,719 --> 00:54:25,053
{\an2}You're so right, and I am so wrong.
1323
00:54:25,220 --> 00:54:27,055
{\an2}Welcome to the Phantom Zone, bad guy.
1324
00:54:27,222 --> 00:54:28,223
{\an2}Yeah, bad guy.
1325
00:54:28,390 --> 00:54:30,267
{\an2}-My name is Phyllis.
-Oh, that was my grandma's name.
1326
00:54:30,434 --> 00:54:33,020
{\an2}Now hold still while I scan you.
1327
00:54:33,228 --> 00:54:34,897
{\an2}[imitates beeping]
Scanning for badness.
1328
00:54:35,063 --> 00:54:36,607
{\an2}Trying to assess whether you are bad.
1329
00:54:36,773 --> 00:54:37,983
{\an2}[Joker imitating guns firing]
1330
00:54:38,150 --> 00:54:39,902
{\an2}[Joker laughing]
1331
00:54:41,570 --> 00:54:43,280
{\an2}Ugh! Your whole thing screams "bad guy."
1332
00:54:43,614 --> 00:54:45,699
{\an2}Oh, yeah. I'm a really bad person.
1333
00:54:45,866 --> 00:54:47,659
{\an2}But with vulnerabilities.
1334
00:54:47,826 --> 00:54:49,870
{\an2}Who, me? [chuckling] No way.
1335
00:54:50,037 --> 00:54:52,831
{\an2}So, where do you keep
all the other bad people in this place?
1336
00:54:53,207 --> 00:54:54,791
{\an2}They're standing right behind you.
1337
00:54:55,000 --> 00:54:56,293
{\an2}-[evil laughter]
-Whoa!
1338
00:54:57,294 --> 00:54:58,337
{\an2}Hi there, guys.
1339
00:54:58,504 --> 00:54:59,838
{\an2}Lovely to meet you all. I'm the...
1340
00:55:00,005 --> 00:55:01,840
{\an2}Oh, fist bump?
There we... Handshake?
1341
00:55:02,549 --> 00:55:04,051
{\an2}[laughs] It doesn't matter.
I'm the Joker.
1342
00:55:04,218 --> 00:55:05,636
{\an2}Take a look at the new guy.
1343
00:55:05,802 --> 00:55:08,055
{\an2}Guess they'll just let anybody in here.
1344
00:55:08,222 --> 00:55:09,640
{\an2}Oh, no, no, no. I'm very bad, too.
1345
00:55:09,806 --> 00:55:12,017
{\an2}They just showed a video montage--
1346
00:55:12,184 --> 00:55:13,560
{\an2}-Boring!
-What?
1347
00:55:13,727 --> 00:55:15,354
{\an2}-You're boring.
-He looks delicious.
1348
00:55:15,562 --> 00:55:16,772
{\an2}-[gasps]
-Let's eat this guy.
1349
00:55:17,022 --> 00:55:18,065
{\an2}-[growling]
-[Joker stammers]
1350
00:55:18,357 --> 00:55:20,651
{\an2}Stop with the violence for just a second!
1351
00:55:20,817 --> 00:55:24,112
{\an2}What if I told you
I could get you outta here?
1352
00:55:25,572 --> 00:55:26,573
{\an2}I'm sorry, what'd you just say?
1353
00:55:26,740 --> 00:55:28,242
{\an2}That's right. I'm so bad,
1354
00:55:28,450 --> 00:55:31,578
{\an2}I got myself thrown into
this heck-hole on purpose!
1355
00:55:31,745 --> 00:55:32,788
{\an2}I'm listening.
1356
00:55:32,955 --> 00:55:35,040
{\an2}Count me interested.
1357
00:55:35,207 --> 00:55:36,917
{\an2}Look, everyone here knows
1358
00:55:37,084 --> 00:55:39,419
{\an2}what it's like to be hurt
by a hero, don't they?
1359
00:55:39,586 --> 00:55:41,547
{\an2}We've all been taken for granted, right?
1360
00:55:41,713 --> 00:55:43,382
{\an2}[all] Yeah, bro.
[Medusa] I'm relating.
1361
00:55:43,549 --> 00:55:47,261
{\an2}Well, that's why I came
to this space prison.
1362
00:55:47,427 --> 00:55:48,887
{\an2}To recruit the universe's greatest--
1363
00:55:49,054 --> 00:55:51,139
{\an2}-We'll do it!
-I'm sorry?
1364
00:55:51,306 --> 00:55:52,599
{\an2}You were going to
say something about
1365
00:55:52,766 --> 00:55:54,726
{\an2}recruiting the universe's
greatest villains
1366
00:55:54,893 --> 00:55:57,271
{\an2}to conquer a superhero.
1367
00:55:57,437 --> 00:55:59,022
{\an2}-Am I right?
-Uh, yeah.
1368
00:55:59,189 --> 00:56:01,024
{\an2}-Well, we're in!
-[all] Yay!
1369
00:56:01,275 --> 00:56:02,484
{\an2}Really? Because I brought a PowerPoint--
1370
00:56:02,651 --> 00:56:03,735
{\an2}Still boring!
1371
00:56:03,902 --> 00:56:05,153
{\an2}Yeah. Just get on with it.
1372
00:56:05,320 --> 00:56:06,780
{\an2}You want us to humiliate him?
1373
00:56:06,947 --> 00:56:07,990
{\an2}I certainly do. Yes.
1374
00:56:08,156 --> 00:56:10,701
{\an2}You want us to make him
grovel at your feet?
1375
00:56:10,867 --> 00:56:12,744
{\an2}I would like to see that very much!
1376
00:56:12,911 --> 00:56:15,080
{\an2}[echoing] You want us to smite him?
1377
00:56:15,247 --> 00:56:16,456
{\an2}Well, yeah, yeah, yeah.
1378
00:56:16,623 --> 00:56:18,333
{\an2}You want us to make
the rivers of Gotham City
1379
00:56:18,500 --> 00:56:20,127
{\an2}run red with his blood?
1380
00:56:20,294 --> 00:56:21,420
{\an2}Oh, that's--
1381
00:56:21,587 --> 00:56:23,964
{\an2}Oh, no blood?
How do you feel about lava?
1382
00:56:24,131 --> 00:56:25,132
{\an2}Yes! Lava.
1383
00:56:25,299 --> 00:56:26,300
{\an2}-Done.
-[all] Yay!
1384
00:56:26,508 --> 00:56:27,593
{\an2}[King Kong] I can't wait
to crush buildings.
1385
00:56:27,801 --> 00:56:28,802
{\an2}[Velociraptor]
Excuse me. Hello?
1386
00:56:28,969 --> 00:56:30,637
{\an2}Over here.
I don't want to be a downer,
1387
00:56:30,804 --> 00:56:32,889
{\an2}but how exactly are we going
to get outta this place?
1388
00:56:33,056 --> 00:56:35,976
{\an2}Oh, leave that to me.
1389
00:56:36,560 --> 00:56:37,811
{\an2}[guard] Don't wanna jinx us,
1390
00:56:37,978 --> 00:56:40,314
{\an2}but I'll be a lot happier when
this Phantom Zone Projector
1391
00:56:40,522 --> 00:56:41,982
{\an2}is locked up tight.
1392
00:56:42,149 --> 00:56:43,191
{\an2}[elevator bell dings]
1393
00:56:43,483 --> 00:56:44,693
{\an2}Going up, ma'am?
1394
00:56:44,860 --> 00:56:47,988
{\an2}No. You're going down!
1395
00:56:48,655 --> 00:56:50,407
{\an2}-[guards groaning]
-Look out! Smash!
1396
00:56:51,491 --> 00:56:53,660
{\an2}I guess you're right.
I am going up. Ding!
1397
00:56:56,163 --> 00:56:58,165
{\an8}Here comes the...
1398
00:56:58,332 --> 00:57:00,834
{\an2}Phantom Zone!
1399
00:57:03,837 --> 00:57:04,880
{\an2}Huh?
1400
00:57:05,088 --> 00:57:06,340
{\an2}[thunder crashing]
1401
00:57:06,673 --> 00:57:08,008
{\an2}I'm gonna go start looting.
1402
00:57:08,175 --> 00:57:11,470
{\an2}[Joker] Hello, Gotham City!
1403
00:57:11,637 --> 00:57:14,139
{\an2}The Clown Prince of Crime
1404
00:57:14,431 --> 00:57:15,932
{\an2}is back!
1405
00:57:16,099 --> 00:57:18,518
{\an2}Commissioner Gordon,
you gotta take a look at this.
1406
00:57:18,769 --> 00:57:19,770
{\an2}-[music playing]
-[Barbara] What's that?
1407
00:57:19,937 --> 00:57:21,813
{\an2}[guard] A monkey
and dog are friends.
1408
00:57:21,980 --> 00:57:23,315
{\an2}-[laughs]
-Not that. That!
1409
00:57:23,482 --> 00:57:26,526
{\an2}And I've cometo finally take over the city.
1410
00:57:26,693 --> 00:57:28,654
{\an2}But in order to do that,
1411
00:57:28,820 --> 00:57:32,699
{\an2}I need to break my friendsout of a giant, scary prison.
1412
00:57:32,866 --> 00:57:35,160
{\an2}-Hey, guys, he means us!
-[prisoners] Yay!
1413
00:57:35,369 --> 00:57:36,536
{\an2}And I ain't talking about
1414
00:57:36,703 --> 00:57:39,373
{\an2}those rogue losers dressed in cosplay!
1415
00:57:39,665 --> 00:57:41,416
{\an2}-[prisoners] Oh!
-Me-ouch.
1416
00:57:41,583 --> 00:57:43,794
{\an2}I'm talking about my new peeps!
1417
00:57:43,961 --> 00:57:45,420
{\an2}And they're just like me.
1418
00:57:45,712 --> 00:57:48,256
{\an2}The greatest villains you'll ever see.
1419
00:57:48,423 --> 00:57:49,967
{\an2}You wanna meet them?
1420
00:57:50,217 --> 00:57:51,885
{\an2}-No.
-Too bad.
1421
00:57:53,178 --> 00:57:54,596
{\an2}He's evil, he's magic,
1422
00:57:54,763 --> 00:57:57,557
{\an2}and it's about to get tragic.
1423
00:57:57,724 --> 00:57:59,393
{\an2}It's Voldemort.
1424
00:57:59,559 --> 00:58:00,811
{\an2}Magic!
1425
00:58:02,396 --> 00:58:03,772
{\an2}You are a fish.
1426
00:58:03,939 --> 00:58:04,940
{\an2}You are a frog.
1427
00:58:05,107 --> 00:58:06,108
{\an2}You are a fish frog.
1428
00:58:06,274 --> 00:58:08,860
{\an2}[Joker] He's a 9,000-year-old
incarnation of evil,
1429
00:58:09,027 --> 00:58:10,654
{\an2}with an eye for jewelry.
1430
00:58:10,821 --> 00:58:12,406
{\an2}Give it up for Sauron!
1431
00:58:12,572 --> 00:58:14,574
{\an2}[Sauron] Good afternoon, Gotham City.
1432
00:58:14,908 --> 00:58:16,159
{\an2}[roars]
1433
00:58:17,828 --> 00:58:18,870
{\an2}[people screaming]
1434
00:58:19,204 --> 00:58:22,082
{\an2}[Joker] He likes long, violent walks
on historic buildings.
1435
00:58:22,249 --> 00:58:23,667
{\an2}It's King Kong!
1436
00:58:23,834 --> 00:58:25,043
{\an2}Come at me, Gotham!
1437
00:58:25,544 --> 00:58:26,712
{\an2}[siren wailing]
1438
00:58:27,004 --> 00:58:30,215
{\an2}Commissioner Gordon, these monsters,
they're too powerful.
1439
00:58:30,924 --> 00:58:32,300
{\an2}Can you contain them to downtown?
1440
00:58:32,926 --> 00:58:34,219
{\an2}That's gonna be impossible.
1441
00:58:34,386 --> 00:58:36,096
{\an2}Half the police force are fish!
1442
00:58:36,263 --> 00:58:38,765
{\an2}Sergeant Jackson!
Stop floppin' around!
1443
00:58:38,932 --> 00:58:40,934
{\an8}[Joker] And rounding out
the evil all-stars,
1444
00:58:41,101 --> 00:58:42,310
{\an2}Wicked Witch!
1445
00:58:42,477 --> 00:58:43,770
{\an2}Medusa.
1446
00:58:43,937 --> 00:58:45,272
{\an2}And British robots!
1447
00:58:45,439 --> 00:58:46,565
{\an2}[Daleks] Exterminate!
1448
00:58:46,732 --> 00:58:48,066
{\an2}[Joker] Ask your nerd friends.
1449
00:58:48,608 --> 00:58:50,986
{\an2}Hello? Bad guys?
1450
00:58:51,194 --> 00:58:52,195
{\an2}[man screams]
1451
00:58:53,280 --> 00:58:54,448
{\an2}[laughs]
1452
00:58:54,948 --> 00:58:58,076
{\an2}What a crew, huh?
And they all work for me!
1453
00:58:58,243 --> 00:59:01,955
{\an2}Who's the greatest villain
of them all now, Batman?
1454
00:59:02,122 --> 00:59:03,290
{\an2}Still not you.
1455
00:59:03,457 --> 00:59:05,459
{\an2}Actually, this does look
pretty terrifying, Bat-Dad.
1456
00:59:05,625 --> 00:59:06,626
{\an2}-[laughing]
-Whee!
1457
00:59:06,793 --> 00:59:08,295
{\an2}Nice destruction all around.
1458
00:59:08,462 --> 00:59:09,463
{\an2}Watch your step!
1459
00:59:09,629 --> 00:59:11,131
{\an2}Good work, guys!
1460
00:59:11,298 --> 00:59:13,258
{\an2}Now, all that's left for me
1461
00:59:13,425 --> 00:59:16,303
{\an2}is to rub it in Batman's bat face.
1462
00:59:16,470 --> 00:59:18,930
{\an2}Hey, Sauron, doesn't your flaming eye
1463
00:59:19,097 --> 00:59:21,767
{\an2}have a unique ability
to peer through time and space?
1464
00:59:21,975 --> 00:59:24,144
{\an2}-Uh-huh.
-Well, I need to find Batman.
1465
00:59:24,311 --> 00:59:25,854
{\an2}Where's homeboy's man cave?
1466
00:59:26,063 --> 00:59:27,814
{\an2}Hmm. Give me a second.
1467
00:59:27,981 --> 00:59:29,107
{\an2}Scary noise.
1468
00:59:29,274 --> 00:59:30,901
{\an2}It's beneath Wayne Manor!
1469
00:59:31,109 --> 00:59:32,110
{\an2}Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
1470
00:59:32,277 --> 00:59:33,278
{\an2}Hold on a sec.
1471
00:59:33,445 --> 00:59:35,113
{\an2}Are you trying to tell me
1472
00:59:35,280 --> 00:59:37,949
{\an2}that Bruce Wayne is Batman...
1473
00:59:38,784 --> 00:59:39,993
{\an2}...'s roommate?
1474
00:59:40,494 --> 00:59:42,245
{\an2}Uh... Yeah.
1475
00:59:42,954 --> 00:59:45,874
{\an2}Evil army, this way to the Batcave!
1476
00:59:46,166 --> 00:59:48,376
{\an2}[villains growling]
1477
00:59:50,337 --> 00:59:51,338
{\an2}Good grief!
1478
00:59:53,006 --> 00:59:54,049
{\an2}[roaring]
1479
00:59:59,012 --> 01:00:00,013
{\an2}[roars]
1480
01:00:02,557 --> 01:00:03,892
{\an2}[whooping]
1481
01:00:04,059 --> 01:00:05,393
{\an2}Hey, Batman!
1482
01:00:05,560 --> 01:00:07,395
{\an2}Joker's home. [echoing]
1483
01:00:08,688 --> 01:00:11,566
{\an2}[laughs] I'm rubbing my butt
all over your stuff.
1484
01:00:11,733 --> 01:00:13,860
{\an2}We're going to have to rename this
the Butt-mobile.
1485
01:00:14,069 --> 01:00:15,695
{\an2}[all laughing]
1486
01:00:15,946 --> 01:00:17,072
{\an2}Hey, evil army.
1487
01:00:17,239 --> 01:00:18,657
{\an2}I need Batman brought here.
1488
01:00:18,824 --> 01:00:20,158
{\an2}Now go get him!
1489
01:00:20,325 --> 01:00:21,493
{\an2}Joker out!
1490
01:00:21,701 --> 01:00:22,702
{\an2}[glass shatters]
1491
01:00:24,830 --> 01:00:25,831
{\an2}Uh...
1492
01:00:25,997 --> 01:00:27,082
{\an2}Padre?
1493
01:00:27,249 --> 01:00:28,250
{\an2}[Batman] Yeah?
1494
01:00:28,416 --> 01:00:29,835
{\an2}Do you ever get scared?
1495
01:00:30,544 --> 01:00:31,586
{\an2}No.
1496
01:00:32,504 --> 01:00:35,715
{\an2}Yeah, that's what I figured,
'cause you're Batman.
1497
01:00:38,051 --> 01:00:40,720
{\an2}[Robin sniffling]
1498
01:00:42,139 --> 01:00:45,559
{\an2}Hey, kid.
You know who does get scared?
1499
01:00:45,725 --> 01:00:46,726
{\an2}[Robin] Who?
1500
01:00:46,935 --> 01:00:48,270
{\an2}Bruce Wayne.
1501
01:00:48,436 --> 01:00:50,230
{\an2}-Really?
-Yeah.
1502
01:00:50,397 --> 01:00:52,065
{\an2}Bruno told me once
1503
01:00:52,232 --> 01:00:55,443
{\an2}that sometimes the only way
to get out of a down moment
1504
01:00:55,610 --> 01:00:57,237
{\an2}is to start boxing.
1505
01:00:57,737 --> 01:00:59,698
{\an2}And by "boxing," he meant
1506
01:00:59,865 --> 01:01:01,241
{\an2}beatboxing.
1507
01:01:01,408 --> 01:01:02,617
{\an2}-Oh!
-[clears throat]
1508
01:01:02,784 --> 01:01:04,870
{\an2}[singing]
Na, na, na, na, na, na, na...
1509
01:01:05,036 --> 01:01:07,038
{\an2}[beatboxing]
1510
01:01:07,205 --> 01:01:08,915
{\an2}Feel it, uh-huh
1511
01:01:09,082 --> 01:01:10,959
{\an2}Dick Grayson on the mic, go
1512
01:01:11,126 --> 01:01:12,127
{\an2}Oh. Um...
1513
01:01:12,294 --> 01:01:13,920
{\an2}[beatboxing]
1514
01:01:14,087 --> 01:01:15,922
{\an2}[both beatboxing]
1515
01:01:17,924 --> 01:01:20,051
{\an2}Oh, my gosh.
This does make me feel better.
1516
01:01:20,218 --> 01:01:21,261
{\an2}Okay. Shh. Batman solo.
1517
01:01:21,428 --> 01:01:23,597
{\an2}[singing] Bat, bat, batCan I get a bat?
1518
01:01:23,763 --> 01:01:25,098
{\an2}Can I get a bat?Bat...
1519
01:01:25,265 --> 01:01:26,266
{\an2}-[device ringing]
-[gasps] The Bat-Fax!
1520
01:01:28,351 --> 01:01:30,187
{\an2}Ha! The city needs me.
Bang, bang, bang!
1521
01:01:30,353 --> 01:01:31,396
{\an2}Excuse me.
1522
01:01:31,563 --> 01:01:33,899
{\an2}Can you get the commissioner
and show her this?
1523
01:01:34,065 --> 01:01:36,276
{\an2}-Batman.
-Would you stop doing that?
1524
01:01:36,776 --> 01:01:38,653
{\an2}I sent the Bat-Fax.
1525
01:01:39,154 --> 01:01:41,323
{\an2}[sighs] I hate to say this,
but you're right.
1526
01:01:41,489 --> 01:01:42,490
{\an2}The city needs you.
1527
01:01:42,657 --> 01:01:43,783
{\an2}Yes! Let me out.
1528
01:01:43,950 --> 01:01:46,786
{\an2}I'm only going to let you out
on one condition.
1529
01:01:46,953 --> 01:01:49,664
{\an2}-Name it.
-You can't do it by yourself.
1530
01:01:49,956 --> 01:01:51,166
{\an2}[growls]
1531
01:01:52,417 --> 01:01:53,793
{\an2}Fine. Who am I working with?
1532
01:01:53,960 --> 01:01:56,421
{\an2}SEAL Team Six? Fox Force Five?
Suicide Squad?
1533
01:01:56,588 --> 01:01:58,673
{\an2}No. Me.
1534
01:01:58,840 --> 01:01:59,841
{\an2}Oh, I wanna help, too!
1535
01:02:00,008 --> 01:02:01,343
{\an2}-And I shall join as well.
-Whoa!
1536
01:02:01,509 --> 01:02:03,303
{\an2}Alfred Pennyworth
at your service, ma'am.
1537
01:02:03,470 --> 01:02:05,055
{\an2}-How did you--
-Alfred, you gotta let me out of here.
1538
01:02:05,222 --> 01:02:08,308
{\an2}Sir, those creatures out there
are unlike anything we've ever seen.
1539
01:02:08,475 --> 01:02:10,352
{\an2}Speak for yourself.
You don't know everything I've seen.
1540
01:02:10,518 --> 01:02:11,645
{\an2}I haven't told you everything.
1541
01:02:11,811 --> 01:02:14,314
{\an2}And you'll never be able
to defeat them alone.
1542
01:02:14,481 --> 01:02:16,650
{\an2}And it'll be more fun
if we all do it together!
1543
01:02:16,816 --> 01:02:18,485
{\an2}What's the worst thing
that could happen?
1544
01:02:18,902 --> 01:02:20,487
{\an2}What are you so afraid of?
1545
01:02:20,654 --> 01:02:22,489
{\an2}The thing I'm most afraid of?
1546
01:02:27,827 --> 01:02:29,788
{\an2}I gotta be honest with you.
It's snake clowns.
1547
01:02:29,955 --> 01:02:31,164
{\an2}Yeah, that's not a thing.
1548
01:02:31,331 --> 01:02:32,749
{\an2}Well then, nothing.
1549
01:02:32,958 --> 01:02:35,168
{\an2}-I'm not afraid of anything.
-Okay.
1550
01:02:35,919 --> 01:02:37,170
{\an2}-[door lock beeps]
-Prove it.
1551
01:02:37,504 --> 01:02:39,005
{\an2}-Oh, I will.
-Good.
1552
01:02:39,172 --> 01:02:41,466
{\an2}Do you know what the B-A-T
in Batman stands for?
1553
01:02:41,633 --> 01:02:43,802
{\an2}-Not really.
-Best At Teamwork.
1554
01:02:43,969 --> 01:02:46,346
{\an2}Best At Teamwork Man
is my full name.
1555
01:02:46,513 --> 01:02:48,348
{\an2}Yay! We're going on a family trip.
1556
01:02:48,515 --> 01:02:50,058
{\an2}This is not a family trip.
1557
01:02:50,225 --> 01:02:51,393
{\an2}I can wear my costume, too.
1558
01:02:51,559 --> 01:02:53,687
{\an2}Well, luckily for us,
you left your costume back at the--
1559
01:02:53,853 --> 01:02:55,063
{\an2}-Rip!
-Oh!
1560
01:02:55,230 --> 01:02:57,399
{\an2}Nope. Under your clothes.
That's perfect.
1561
01:02:57,565 --> 01:02:59,985
{\an2}-Rip!
-Alfred, what are you doing?
1562
01:03:00,151 --> 01:03:01,152
{\an2}I miss the '60s.
1563
01:03:01,319 --> 01:03:02,529
{\an2}Hey, can Scarecrow help?
1564
01:03:02,696 --> 01:03:04,197
{\an2}-[prisoners] Yeah!
-He's destroying our city, too!
1565
01:03:04,364 --> 01:03:06,574
{\an2}Permit us to lend you assistance.
1566
01:03:06,741 --> 01:03:08,243
{\an2}Yeah. Why don't we use these guys?
1567
01:03:08,410 --> 01:03:09,411
{\an2}What am I gonna do?
1568
01:03:09,577 --> 01:03:11,371
{\an2}Get a bunch of criminals together
to fight the criminals?
1569
01:03:11,538 --> 01:03:12,956
{\an2}That's a stupid idea.
1570
01:03:13,873 --> 01:03:15,208
{\an2}[sirens wailing]
1571
01:03:16,751 --> 01:03:18,545
{\an2}Okay, guys. Game plan.
1572
01:03:18,712 --> 01:03:19,713
{\an2}Joker's taken the Projector
1573
01:03:19,879 --> 01:03:20,880
{\an2}-to Wayne Manor.
-Wayne Manor.
1574
01:03:21,047 --> 01:03:22,382
{\an2}Right. Thanks, Batman.
1575
01:03:22,549 --> 01:03:23,550
{\an2}-We need that Projector.
-Projector.
1576
01:03:23,717 --> 01:03:24,718
{\an2}Or there's no way
1577
01:03:24,884 --> 01:03:25,885
{\an2}-to blast these monsters...
-Monsters.
1578
01:03:26,052 --> 01:03:27,387
{\an2}-...back to the Phantom Zone.
-Phantom Zone? Yep.
1579
01:03:27,554 --> 01:03:29,055
{\an2}Batman, I really don't
need you to finish my--
1580
01:03:29,222 --> 01:03:30,265
{\an2}-Sand castles.
-No.
1581
01:03:30,432 --> 01:03:31,558
{\an2}-Sister's homework.
-No.
1582
01:03:31,725 --> 01:03:33,393
{\an2}-Succulent something.
-No.
1583
01:03:33,893 --> 01:03:34,936
{\an2}Um... Everybody?
1584
01:03:35,103 --> 01:03:37,897
{\an2}[Sauron] Batman is in Arkham Asylum.
1585
01:03:38,064 --> 01:03:39,733
{\an2}Get him!
1586
01:03:39,899 --> 01:03:41,067
{\an2}Okay, everyone, grab on to me.
1587
01:03:41,901 --> 01:03:43,278
{\an2}[all] Whoa!
1588
01:03:45,071 --> 01:03:46,072
{\an2}[all grunt]
1589
01:03:47,490 --> 01:03:48,742
{\an2}We've gotta take cover!
1590
01:03:48,950 --> 01:03:49,951
{\an2}Whoa!
1591
01:03:50,327 --> 01:03:52,746
{\an2}-Joker has eyes on us.
-Where?
1592
01:03:52,912 --> 01:03:56,374
{\an2}No! I mean,
he literally has a giant eye on us.
1593
01:03:56,541 --> 01:03:58,251
{\an2}I think that thing
can see our every move!
1594
01:03:58,418 --> 01:03:59,544
{\an2}Shaka-laka-lako.
1595
01:03:59,794 --> 01:04:03,214
{\an2}We've got to destroy it,
or we'll never make it to Wayne Manor.
1596
01:04:03,381 --> 01:04:04,424
{\an2}Uh... Bat-Dad?
1597
01:04:04,632 --> 01:04:06,009
{\an2}I really think you should see this.
1598
01:04:06,176 --> 01:04:07,635
{\an2}[King Kong] Building survey!
1599
01:04:08,428 --> 01:04:10,055
{\an2}This building's not up to code!
1600
01:04:10,305 --> 01:04:11,306
{\an2}[all screaming]
1601
01:04:11,598 --> 01:04:12,766
{\an2}[Roaring]
1602
01:04:16,936 --> 01:04:18,772
{\an2}-[grunts] Gotcha.
-[Robin yelps]
1603
01:04:19,439 --> 01:04:20,648
{\an2}[roaring]
1604
01:04:22,067 --> 01:04:23,234
{\an2}Is that real lava?
1605
01:04:24,944 --> 01:04:25,945
{\an2}I'm okay.
1606
01:04:28,073 --> 01:04:29,449
{\an2}All right, yeah. It's 100% lava.
1607
01:04:29,824 --> 01:04:31,159
{\an2}[all yelp]
1608
01:04:31,451 --> 01:04:33,495
{\an2}-Everyone, start throwing me bricks.
-Right away, sir.
1609
01:04:33,661 --> 01:04:35,163
{\an2}-I need a 4x6. Come on, quick.
-Here you go.
1610
01:04:35,330 --> 01:04:36,373
{\an2}-I need an elbow.
-Elbow.
1611
01:04:43,296 --> 01:04:44,297
{\an2}Ow!
1612
01:04:49,427 --> 01:04:50,428
{\an2}[Batman] Whoo!
1613
01:04:50,595 --> 01:04:52,847
{\an2}Yes! I did it. Pretty cool, huh?
1614
01:04:53,014 --> 01:04:54,516
{\an2}[Barbara muffled] Batman?
[Batman] Yeah?
1615
01:04:54,682 --> 01:04:57,102
{\an2}Why did you build this thing
with only one seat?
1616
01:04:57,268 --> 01:05:00,271
{\an2}'Cause last I checked,
I only had one butt. What the...
1617
01:05:01,106 --> 01:05:02,941
{\an2}What have you done to Wayne Manor?
1618
01:05:03,775 --> 01:05:05,527
{\an2}[Joker] Hey, Batman, guess what!
1619
01:05:05,777 --> 01:05:07,362
{\an2}I found out one of your secrets.
1620
01:05:07,612 --> 01:05:10,115
{\an2}-Uh-oh.
-What do we have here, Batman?
1621
01:05:10,323 --> 01:05:12,409
{\an2}It looks like a bunch
of relationship comedies.
1622
01:05:12,575 --> 01:05:14,285
{\an2}-What's that one?
-Must Love Dogs.
1623
01:05:14,452 --> 01:05:15,495
{\an2}Must love crying.
1624
01:05:15,662 --> 01:05:17,622
{\an2}-Marley & Me.
-I love the ending.
1625
01:05:17,789 --> 01:05:20,458
{\an2}Oh! Serendipity?
1626
01:05:20,625 --> 01:05:22,293
{\an2}We have Serendipity?
I love that movie!
1627
01:05:22,460 --> 01:05:24,212
{\an2}[Joker] For a loner, Batman,
1628
01:05:24,379 --> 01:05:27,674
{\an2}you sure like movies
about relationships!
1629
01:05:27,841 --> 01:05:28,883
{\an2}Oh! And look what else I found!
1630
01:05:29,509 --> 01:05:31,511
{\an2}All your wonderful toys.
1631
01:05:33,972 --> 01:05:37,725
{\an2}Accio lightning storm!
1632
01:05:38,685 --> 01:05:41,479
{\an2}-Uh... Everyone, hold on.
-[all screaming]
1633
01:05:42,105 --> 01:05:43,189
{\an2}[villains imitating guns firing]
1634
01:05:46,609 --> 01:05:49,654
{\an2}[Joker] Gremlins,
dismantle that plane now!
1635
01:05:50,864 --> 01:05:52,282
{\an2}Ugly monsters on our three.
1636
01:05:52,490 --> 01:05:53,741
{\an2}[all chittering]
1637
01:05:53,992 --> 01:05:55,660
{\an2}-Uh... Padre?
-Not now, kid.
1638
01:05:57,579 --> 01:05:59,122
{\an2}Kind of got my hands full.
1639
01:06:00,957 --> 01:06:02,959
{\an2}I've got good tone. Firing.
1640
01:06:06,921 --> 01:06:08,673
{\an2}-Uh... Batman?
-What's up, buddy?
1641
01:06:09,174 --> 01:06:10,508
{\an2}[Robin] Are we nearly at Wayne Manor?
1642
01:06:10,675 --> 01:06:11,843
{\an2}[Batman] Why?
1643
01:06:12,260 --> 01:06:14,137
{\an2}Uh... Your number two
needs to go number one.
1644
01:06:14,304 --> 01:06:16,473
{\an2}I thought I told you
to go back at the prison.
1645
01:06:16,639 --> 01:06:18,391
{\an2}-I tried, but Bane was in there.
-So?
1646
01:06:18,558 --> 01:06:20,852
{\an2}He had sort of a "get out
of this bathroom now" vibe.
1647
01:06:21,019 --> 01:06:23,521
{\an2}[Batman] I knew I shouldn't
have given you that water.
1648
01:06:25,273 --> 01:06:26,983
{\an2}Can you hold it in like a big boy?
1649
01:06:27,442 --> 01:06:28,651
{\an2}[Barbara] Engine one down.
1650
01:06:28,818 --> 01:06:30,195
{\an2}Not a big deal.
Don't worry about it. It's fine.
1651
01:06:30,403 --> 01:06:32,322
{\an2}-[Barbara] Engine two down.
-It does that sometimes.
1652
01:06:32,906 --> 01:06:34,032
{\an2}[Barbara] We've lost engine three.
1653
01:06:34,199 --> 01:06:35,450
{\an2}Oh. Could live without it.
1654
01:06:37,202 --> 01:06:38,703
{\an2}[Barbara] Engine four!
1655
01:06:38,953 --> 01:06:40,205
{\an2}[all screaming]
1656
01:06:40,455 --> 01:06:41,706
{\an2}That I do need to fix.
1657
01:06:41,915 --> 01:06:44,000
{\an2}Good news.
Our bathroom problem is solved.
1658
01:06:46,586 --> 01:06:48,254
{\an2}[Batman] You three wait here
while I go fix the engine.
1659
01:06:48,421 --> 01:06:51,174
{\an2}Don't worry, Batman.
You fix the Batwing, I'll fly.
1660
01:06:51,341 --> 01:06:52,842
{\an2}All good, Babs.
I've got my autopilot on it.
1661
01:06:53,009 --> 01:06:54,010
{\an2}[huns] Done.
1662
01:06:54,344 --> 01:06:56,137
{\an2}[Barbara] Autopilot?
That's just a rope!
1663
01:06:56,304 --> 01:06:59,599
{\an2}Exactly. All right, guys.
Until I get back, rope's in charge.
1664
01:07:00,350 --> 01:07:01,392
{\an2}Thanks, rope.
1665
01:07:03,978 --> 01:07:06,773
{\an2}All right, let's see.
Yes, the piston brake out here.
1666
01:07:06,940 --> 01:07:09,442
{\an2}Jet engine brake in here and...
1667
01:07:10,610 --> 01:07:12,695
{\an2}Get out of here. No.
Give me... No! Stop it!
1668
01:07:12,862 --> 01:07:14,405
{\an2}Come on, Master Dick.
We need to help him.
1669
01:07:14,572 --> 01:07:15,615
{\an2}I'm with you, Grandpa!
1670
01:07:15,740 --> 01:07:16,908
{\an2}Get off my Padre!
1671
01:07:17,075 --> 01:07:18,952
{\an2}[Alfred] Unhand him,
you animatronic fiends.
1672
01:07:19,118 --> 01:07:22,247
{\an2}What are you two doing here?
I told you to stay in the cockpit.
1673
01:07:23,122 --> 01:07:25,041
{\an2}You disobeyed me.
You're on a timeout.
1674
01:07:25,208 --> 01:07:26,834
{\an2}Batman, you're on a timeout.
1675
01:07:27,001 --> 01:07:29,254
{\an2}What? Alfred, you better
un-timeout me right now!
1676
01:07:29,420 --> 01:07:31,673
{\an2}No. Not until you un-timeout Master Dick.
1677
01:07:31,923 --> 01:07:32,924
{\an2}[gasps]
1678
01:07:33,091 --> 01:07:34,759
{\an2}Guys, you're all un-timeouted!
1679
01:07:34,926 --> 01:07:35,927
{\an2}We have incoming!
1680
01:07:36,094 --> 01:07:37,637
{\an2}-Sir! Watch out for those...
-What are you doing?
1681
01:07:37,804 --> 01:07:38,805
{\an2}[screaming]
1682
01:07:42,976 --> 01:07:43,977
{\an2}[Alfred and Robin screaming]
1683
01:07:44,185 --> 01:07:45,728
{\an2}Okay. Everybody, timeout off.
1684
01:07:45,937 --> 01:07:47,480
{\an2}Whoo-hoo! I've been parented.
1685
01:07:47,647 --> 01:07:49,774
{\an2}-Batman, I can help you.
-No. Protect the rope.
1686
01:07:49,941 --> 01:07:51,359
{\an2}The rope is fine!
1687
01:07:51,526 --> 01:07:52,610
{\an2}Save Master Dick!
1688
01:07:52,777 --> 01:07:55,405
{\an2}I'm fine. I'll just do
one of my gymnastics moves to...
1689
01:07:55,572 --> 01:07:56,573
{\an2}[yelps]
1690
01:07:57,031 --> 01:07:58,116
{\an2}No!
1691
01:08:02,161 --> 01:08:03,413
{\an2}[thunder crashing]
1692
01:08:03,830 --> 01:08:04,872
{\an2}Dick...
1693
01:08:05,081 --> 01:08:06,541
{\an2}[screaming]
1694
01:08:08,585 --> 01:08:09,752
{\an2}Gotcha!
1695
01:08:13,423 --> 01:08:15,341
{\an2}Hold on, Alfred. I'm almost there!
1696
01:08:16,926 --> 01:08:18,177
{\an2}-No!
-[gasps]
1697
01:08:20,763 --> 01:08:22,640
{\an2}Alfred!
1698
01:08:29,022 --> 01:08:30,189
{\an2}[gasps]
1699
01:08:31,524 --> 01:08:32,692
{\an2}No.
1700
01:08:37,363 --> 01:08:38,865
{\an2}No!
1701
01:08:40,074 --> 01:08:41,200
{\an2}Move over, rope.
1702
01:08:42,118 --> 01:08:43,161
{\an2}[grunts]
1703
01:08:43,369 --> 01:08:44,537
{\an2}Hold on!
1704
01:08:47,123 --> 01:08:48,333
{\an2}[screaming]
1705
01:08:48,708 --> 01:08:49,959
{\an2}[Barbara yelling]
1706
01:08:53,046 --> 01:08:54,047
{\an2}[screams]
1707
01:08:54,213 --> 01:08:55,757
{\an2}[grunts]
1708
01:08:58,217 --> 01:08:59,719
{\an2}-[Alfred screams]
-Gotcha!
1709
01:09:00,678 --> 01:09:01,804
{\an2}Barbara, did you see that?
1710
01:09:01,971 --> 01:09:03,348
{\an2}Batrope saved Alfred.
1711
01:09:03,556 --> 01:09:06,225
{\an2}Sick moves, rope.
I never doubted you, bro.
1712
01:09:06,351 --> 01:09:08,394
{\an2}[Puter] Actually, sir,Ms. Gordon saved him.
1713
01:09:08,561 --> 01:09:09,812
{\an2}Rope! You lied to me!
1714
01:09:10,813 --> 01:09:13,358
{\an2}Wait a minute.
You mean, without you,
1715
01:09:13,524 --> 01:09:14,734
{\an2}Alfred would have been
1716
01:09:15,568 --> 01:09:16,861
{\an2}street meat?
1717
01:09:17,070 --> 01:09:19,572
{\an2}Batman, trust us.
1718
01:09:19,739 --> 01:09:21,574
{\an2}We can do this.
1719
01:09:21,741 --> 01:09:24,661
{\an2}-Yeah. I know Gymkata.
-Sorry, what's that?
1720
01:09:24,827 --> 01:09:26,454
{\an2}It's a gymnastics-based martial art.
1721
01:09:26,746 --> 01:09:28,873
{\an2}I can punch those '80s monsters
off the plane.
1722
01:09:29,082 --> 01:09:30,333
{\an2}Uh... Okay.
1723
01:09:30,833 --> 01:09:32,794
{\an2}[Puter] Multiple bogeys on our six.
1724
01:09:32,960 --> 01:09:34,212
{\an2}Sir, I'll get them off our back.
1725
01:09:34,379 --> 01:09:36,005
{\an2}I was a tail gunner
for the Royal Air Force.
1726
01:09:36,172 --> 01:09:37,423
{\an2}Locked and loaded, sir!
1727
01:09:37,590 --> 01:09:38,633
{\an2}Good. Love that!
1728
01:09:38,800 --> 01:09:40,593
{\an2}I got an idea.
We're gonna change course.
1729
01:09:40,760 --> 01:09:42,929
{\an2}I want you to fly straight
into that flaming eyeball.
1730
01:09:43,096 --> 01:09:45,848
{\an2}-What?
-Barbara, trust me.
1731
01:09:46,557 --> 01:09:48,726
{\an2}All right. Let's do this.
1732
01:09:49,602 --> 01:09:51,562
{\an2}[villains imitating guns firing]
1733
01:09:53,523 --> 01:09:54,774
{\an2}[roars]
1734
01:09:56,067 --> 01:09:57,694
{\an2}[Batman] We got a giant
sea monster, 12 o'clock!
1735
01:09:57,860 --> 01:09:58,861
{\an2}[Barbara] Got it.
1736
01:10:00,405 --> 01:10:02,365
{\an2}-We've got his attention.
-He's tracking us.
1737
01:10:02,657 --> 01:10:03,658
{\an2}[roars]
1738
01:10:07,412 --> 01:10:08,996
{\an2}[laughing] I've got you now.
1739
01:10:13,626 --> 01:10:15,336
{\an2}Eat dirt!
1740
01:10:15,503 --> 01:10:17,588
{\an2}Bob's your uncle, you ruddy duff cobblers!
1741
01:10:24,053 --> 01:10:25,304
{\an2}Okay, Babs, this is it.
1742
01:10:25,471 --> 01:10:27,682
{\an2}Fly us straight into that eye,
and wait for my signal.
1743
01:10:27,849 --> 01:10:28,933
{\an2}Can it come now?
1744
01:10:29,100 --> 01:10:30,643
{\an2}Can we make the signal thing happen?
1745
01:10:30,810 --> 01:10:31,811
{\an2}Almost there.
1746
01:10:31,978 --> 01:10:33,855
{\an2}Almost there!
1747
01:10:34,021 --> 01:10:36,149
{\an2}-Fire!
-[Batman] Almost there!
1748
01:10:36,315 --> 01:10:37,442
{\an2}[Robin] That fire's coming in hot!
1749
01:10:37,608 --> 01:10:38,651
{\an2}Hot, hot, hot!
1750
01:10:39,110 --> 01:10:40,319
{\an2}Now! Barbara, dive bomb!
1751
01:10:41,571 --> 01:10:42,822
{\an2}[Sauron screams]
1752
01:10:43,656 --> 01:10:45,450
{\an2}[Sauron] My eye!
1753
01:10:46,033 --> 01:10:47,034
{\an2}[all gasp]
1754
01:10:47,618 --> 01:10:49,495
{\an2}[Joker] Sauron!
1755
01:10:49,996 --> 01:10:50,997
{\an2}[gasps]
1756
01:10:52,081 --> 01:10:53,332
{\an2}[whistling]
1757
01:10:55,126 --> 01:10:56,586
{\an2}Nothing to see.
1758
01:11:00,173 --> 01:11:02,425
{\an2}[all groaning]
1759
01:11:03,259 --> 01:11:04,302
{\an2}Whoo-hoo!
1760
01:11:04,469 --> 01:11:06,721
{\an2}-Yes! That was so rad!
-We did it, everyone!
1761
01:11:06,888 --> 01:11:08,014
{\an2}That was so great! Go team!
1762
01:11:08,181 --> 01:11:09,307
{\an2}Come on, let's hear it for us!
1763
01:11:09,474 --> 01:11:10,641
{\an2}-That was incredible!
-[whopping]
1764
01:11:10,850 --> 01:11:11,851
{\an2}I felt so jazzed!
1765
01:11:11,976 --> 01:11:13,186
{\an2}I say "jazzed!"
1766
01:11:13,352 --> 01:11:15,438
{\an2}I gotta give it to you, Batman.
That was awesome.
1767
01:11:15,605 --> 01:11:16,647
{\an2}-Ha! And you were awesome.
-Thanks.
1768
01:11:17,148 --> 01:11:18,357
{\an2}-And you were awesome.
-I love compliments!
1769
01:11:18,483 --> 01:11:20,234
{\an2}And you were awesome,
and I was amazing.
1770
01:11:20,401 --> 01:11:22,153
{\an2}I'm not trying to make it
about myself, obviously.
1771
01:11:22,361 --> 01:11:24,864
{\an2}But I just wanna make sure
that everyone gets a pat on the back.
1772
01:11:25,031 --> 01:11:26,449
{\an2}-Because it feels good.
-It does feel good.
1773
01:11:26,616 --> 01:11:27,992
{\an2}You had a good idea, you had a good idea,
1774
01:11:28,159 --> 01:11:30,161
{\an2}and you had a good idea,
and I had a great idea.
1775
01:11:30,369 --> 01:11:32,580
{\an2}You know what, I think that collectively,
I'm gonna add...
1776
01:11:34,207 --> 01:11:35,500
{\an2}-One.
-[beeps]
1777
01:11:35,750 --> 01:11:36,918
{\an2}-No way!
-Yes!
1778
01:11:37,084 --> 01:11:38,169
{\an2}Man, that feels good.
1779
01:11:38,336 --> 01:11:39,837
{\an2}-Best team ever!
-[laughs]
1780
01:11:40,004 --> 01:11:41,881
{\an2}Let's take a photo!
All right, everyone, squeeze together.
1781
01:11:42,381 --> 01:11:43,424
{\an2}[Batman] Hang on a second.
1782
01:11:43,591 --> 01:11:45,468
{\an2}-Nice and close!
-I gotta get my pump on.
1783
01:11:45,635 --> 01:11:46,636
{\an2}-It's worth it.
-Okay, everybody in?
1784
01:11:46,844 --> 01:11:47,887
{\an2}[Batman] These abs are no fluke.
1785
01:11:48,054 --> 01:11:49,639
{\an2}Everyone say, "Bat Family!"
1786
01:11:49,806 --> 01:11:50,890
{\an2}-[all] Bat Family!
-[camera clicks]
1787
01:11:51,724 --> 01:11:53,142
{\an2}Ooh, let's take a look!
1788
01:11:54,185 --> 01:11:55,353
{\an2}[Barbara] Look at that!
1789
01:11:55,520 --> 01:11:56,896
{\an2}-Splendid.
-Wow.
1790
01:11:57,647 --> 01:11:59,190
{\an2}Didn't it turn out great?
1791
01:12:00,024 --> 01:12:02,276
{\an2}Hey, guys! It's my first family photo!
1792
01:12:03,194 --> 01:12:05,029
{\an2}[all laughing]
1793
01:12:09,617 --> 01:12:11,953
{\an2}[indistinct conversation]
1794
01:12:32,223 --> 01:12:33,599
{\an2}-Hey, Bat-Dad.
-Oh!
1795
01:12:33,975 --> 01:12:35,601
{\an2}Whoa. What are you doing?
1796
01:12:35,768 --> 01:12:38,020
{\an2}I'm trying to give you a big, old H-U-G.
1797
01:12:38,187 --> 01:12:39,564
{\an2}Okay, just...
1798
01:12:41,065 --> 01:12:42,984
{\an2}Batman, are you okay?
1799
01:12:43,401 --> 01:12:45,361
{\an2}[stammers] Yeah, I'm fine.
1800
01:12:45,528 --> 01:12:47,655
{\an2}We are just one big happy
1801
01:12:47,822 --> 01:12:51,367
{\an2}fraternity of people
who did an awesome job together.
1802
01:12:52,785 --> 01:12:54,495
{\an2}I can't think of any other way
to put that.
1803
01:12:54,662 --> 01:12:56,914
{\an2}-Cool.
-So, guys, listen up!
1804
01:12:57,081 --> 01:12:58,708
{\an2}Taking the Projector from the Joker
1805
01:12:58,875 --> 01:13:01,043
{\an2}is gonna be our most
dangerous mission yet.
1806
01:13:01,210 --> 01:13:02,670
{\an2}-A family battle mission!
-Right.
1807
01:13:02,837 --> 01:13:05,423
{\an2}Salvage what you can out of the Scuttler,
and maybe root around,
1808
01:13:05,590 --> 01:13:07,133
{\an2}see if you can find
a few Vitaminwaters or something,
1809
01:13:07,300 --> 01:13:08,301
{\an2}and then we'll head out.
1810
01:13:08,467 --> 01:13:10,303
{\an2}-Right away, sir.
-Anything for you, Padre.
1811
01:13:15,391 --> 01:13:17,184
{\an2}I think I'll need snowshoes.
1812
01:13:17,351 --> 01:13:20,855
{\an2}Yeah, I don't think you'll need snowshoes,
but could you grab that flashlight?
1813
01:13:21,022 --> 01:13:22,106
{\an2}-Batman?
-Padre?
1814
01:13:22,273 --> 01:13:23,316
{\an2}Sir?
1815
01:13:23,482 --> 01:13:25,943
{\an2}What are you doing?
Hey, Batman.
1816
01:13:26,110 --> 01:13:27,403
{\an2}Please, wait!
1817
01:13:27,570 --> 01:13:28,779
{\an2}[Batman] 'Puter.
1818
01:13:30,573 --> 01:13:31,741
{\an2}[Puter] Yes, sir?
1819
01:13:31,908 --> 01:13:33,618
{\an2}I'm locking in some coordinates now.
1820
01:13:33,784 --> 01:13:34,952
{\an2}[imitates beeping]
1821
01:13:35,119 --> 01:13:36,871
{\an2}Take the Scuttler to the taco stand
1822
01:13:37,038 --> 01:13:38,915
{\an2}on the border of Gotham City
and Blüdhaven.
1823
01:13:39,081 --> 01:13:40,333
{\an2}[all] No!
1824
01:13:40,499 --> 01:13:42,418
{\an2}I want you to get these guys
a couple of chimichangas
1825
01:13:42,585 --> 01:13:44,754
{\an2}-and three Jarritos.
-Sir!
1826
01:13:44,921 --> 01:13:48,132
{\an2}And then keep them there until this
whole attack on Gotham City blows over.
1827
01:13:48,299 --> 01:13:51,010
{\an2}Padre, please. Don't do this!
1828
01:13:51,177 --> 01:13:53,179
{\an2}Batman, you need us!
1829
01:13:53,512 --> 01:13:55,431
{\an2}How many times I gotta tell you?
1830
01:13:56,057 --> 01:13:58,267
{\an2}Batman works alone.
1831
01:13:58,893 --> 01:14:00,519
{\an2}No, we have to stick together.
1832
01:14:01,896 --> 01:14:03,022
{\an2}Please.
1833
01:14:03,147 --> 01:14:04,815
{\an2}Now go on, Scuttler. Go!
1834
01:14:05,858 --> 01:14:07,652
{\an2}-Go! Just get outta here.
-[Alfred] Batman.
1835
01:14:07,818 --> 01:14:08,903
{\an2}-[Robin] Padre!
-Get moving!
1836
01:14:09,070 --> 01:14:10,237
{\an2}-[Robin] Please!
-[shooing]
1837
01:14:10,446 --> 01:14:11,447
{\an2}Just go.
1838
01:14:11,614 --> 01:14:12,823
{\an2}[Barbara] Batman! Please, wait!
1839
01:14:12,990 --> 01:14:14,450
{\an2}Scuttler, move out!
1840
01:14:14,617 --> 01:14:16,118
{\an2}[Barbara]
You're doing the wrong thing!
1841
01:14:16,285 --> 01:14:18,579
{\an2}-Listen to me! Don't do this!
-[Alfred] Sir, please. Sir!
1842
01:14:18,746 --> 01:14:20,081
{\an2}[Robin] No!
1843
01:14:41,936 --> 01:14:44,063
{\an2}[Agent Smith] Scanning for intruders.
Scanning for intruders.
1844
01:14:44,230 --> 01:14:45,773
{\an2}Scanning for intruders.
1845
01:14:49,151 --> 01:14:50,152
{\an2}[Joker] Hi, Bats.
1846
01:14:50,319 --> 01:14:51,821
{\an2}What have you done to my...
1847
01:14:51,988 --> 01:14:53,572
{\an2}Bruce Wayne's house?
1848
01:14:53,698 --> 01:14:56,492
{\an2}You'd better hope he's a cool guy
and doesn't go crazy.
1849
01:14:56,659 --> 01:14:58,327
{\an2}What happened to all your friends?
1850
01:14:58,494 --> 01:15:01,706
{\an2}I don't need friends.
I don't need anyone to stop you.
1851
01:15:02,373 --> 01:15:03,374
{\an2}[yells]
1852
01:15:03,749 --> 01:15:05,209
{\an2}[Joker] Are you sure about that?
1853
01:15:05,376 --> 01:15:07,378
{\an2}Look in the mirror, Batman.
[grunts]
1854
01:15:08,879 --> 01:15:11,716
{\an2}When I saw you working
with your friend-family,
1855
01:15:12,550 --> 01:15:14,218
{\an2}I actually thought you'd changed.
1856
01:15:14,969 --> 01:15:16,012
{\an2}But, no.
1857
01:15:16,178 --> 01:15:17,555
{\an2}-You pushed them away.
-[grunting]
1858
01:15:21,058 --> 01:15:23,769
{\an2}You've run away from every other person
in your life.
1859
01:15:23,936 --> 01:15:26,397
{\an2}But I'm the one you're always chasing.
1860
01:15:26,564 --> 01:15:28,816
{\an2}Is this about that stupid
"greatest enemy" thing?
1861
01:15:28,983 --> 01:15:30,443
{\an2}No, it's not.
1862
01:15:31,777 --> 01:15:32,945
{\an2}Not anymore.
1863
01:15:33,112 --> 01:15:34,238
{\an2}[Velociraptor] You tell him, Joker!
1864
01:15:34,405 --> 01:15:35,698
{\an2}[Jaws] It's time for a fresh start.
1865
01:15:35,865 --> 01:15:36,991
{\an2}[Daleks] He's not worth it.
1866
01:15:37,158 --> 01:15:40,578
{\an2}I think after 78 years,
I deserve respect!
1867
01:15:40,745 --> 01:15:42,538
{\an2}That is right. Respect!
1868
01:15:43,122 --> 01:15:47,251
{\an2}Do you realize that you have never once
1869
01:15:47,418 --> 01:15:49,086
{\an2}said the words,
1870
01:15:49,253 --> 01:15:50,671
{\an2}"I hate you, Joker?"
1871
01:15:50,838 --> 01:15:51,922
{\an2}Not once.
1872
01:15:52,089 --> 01:15:55,217
{\an2}Well, I am starting to feel
pretty annoyed with you right now.
1873
01:15:55,384 --> 01:15:56,427
{\an2}That's for darn sure.
1874
01:15:56,594 --> 01:15:58,929
{\an2}Annoyed is not the same thing!
1875
01:15:59,597 --> 01:16:01,557
{\an2}Listen, Batman.
1876
01:16:02,099 --> 01:16:03,809
{\an2}I...
1877
01:16:03,976 --> 01:16:05,227
{\an2}Hate you.
1878
01:16:05,394 --> 01:16:07,104
{\an2}-[all] Aww!
-That's nice.
1879
01:16:07,897 --> 01:16:08,981
{\an2}Now you say it.
1880
01:16:11,108 --> 01:16:12,151
{\an2}Me, too.
1881
01:16:12,359 --> 01:16:13,986
{\an2}[all jeering]
1882
01:16:16,030 --> 01:16:18,449
{\an2}You won't. You won't change.
1883
01:16:18,616 --> 01:16:21,285
{\an2}'Cause you can't.
You won't, and you can't.
1884
01:16:21,452 --> 01:16:23,079
{\an2}[Jaws] Batman will never change.
1885
01:16:23,245 --> 01:16:25,289
{\an2}You know what, boo-boo?
Just shut it down.
1886
01:16:25,456 --> 01:16:27,500
{\an2}These diseased lunatics are right.
1887
01:16:27,666 --> 01:16:28,667
{\an2}Yes, we are!
1888
01:16:28,834 --> 01:16:31,087
{\an2}I am not gonna be part
1889
01:16:31,253 --> 01:16:33,756
{\an2}of a one-sided relationship any longer!
1890
01:16:33,923 --> 01:16:35,174
{\an2}-[Harley Quinn] Yes!
-What are you talking about?
1891
01:16:35,341 --> 01:16:37,176
{\an2}-You and I are done!
-What is wrong with you?
1892
01:16:37,343 --> 01:16:38,344
{\an2}I'm moving on!
1893
01:16:38,511 --> 01:16:39,637
{\an2}That's ridiculous.
1894
01:16:39,804 --> 01:16:41,514
{\an2}And on my way out,
1895
01:16:41,680 --> 01:16:44,767
{\an2}I'm gonna blow up Gotham City!
1896
01:16:44,934 --> 01:16:46,727
{\an2}No. You're not serious.
1897
01:16:46,894 --> 01:16:47,978
{\an2}Wingardium Leviosa!
1898
01:16:48,646 --> 01:16:49,772
{\an2}No!
1899
01:16:49,939 --> 01:16:51,982
{\an2}You know what?
For once, Batman, you're right.
1900
01:16:52,149 --> 01:16:54,360
{\an2}I'm not your greatest enemy.
1901
01:16:54,527 --> 01:16:56,320
{\an2}Your greatest enemy
1902
01:16:56,487 --> 01:16:57,738
{\an2}is you.
1903
01:16:57,905 --> 01:17:00,282
{\an2}-Goodbye, Batman.
-Wait a minute. Hold on a second. [groans]
1904
01:17:00,449 --> 01:17:01,826
{\an2}[Harley Quinn] Good for you, boo-boo!
1905
01:17:01,992 --> 01:17:04,328
{\an2}-[all] Yay!
-Everybody, get a bomb. Let's go.
1906
01:17:04,495 --> 01:17:06,789
{\an2}-Bomb, bomb, bomb. Let's bomb it out.
-[all] Yay!
1907
01:17:07,498 --> 01:17:08,833
{\an2}[all whooping]
1908
01:17:11,001 --> 01:17:13,170
{\an8}[King Kong]
Say goodbye, Gotham City!
1909
01:17:24,348 --> 01:17:25,933
{\an2}-Whoa.
-Hi!
1910
01:17:26,183 --> 01:17:27,184
{\an2}-[gasps]
-Whoa!
1911
01:17:27,518 --> 01:17:29,061
{\an2}Oh, I am so sorry.
1912
01:17:29,228 --> 01:17:30,563
{\an2}It was all my fault, I keep doing that.
1913
01:17:30,729 --> 01:17:32,940
{\an2}Welcome to the Phantom Zone, bad guy.
1914
01:17:33,107 --> 01:17:34,358
{\an2}[gasps]
What are you talking about?
1915
01:17:34,525 --> 01:17:35,526
{\an2}I'm not a bad guy.
1916
01:17:35,693 --> 01:17:37,361
{\an2}But you're all in black.You have a cape.
1917
01:17:37,528 --> 01:17:38,821
{\an2}And you wear a big, scary mask.
1918
01:17:38,988 --> 01:17:39,989
{\an2}Well, I'm not.
1919
01:17:40,156 --> 01:17:41,448
{\an2}And you kicked me in the face.
1920
01:17:41,615 --> 01:17:43,492
{\an2}Listen, I'm Batman.
1921
01:17:43,868 --> 01:17:45,536
{\an2}Oof! You even sound like a bad guy.
1922
01:17:45,703 --> 01:17:47,204
{\an2}I swear, I am a good guy.
1923
01:17:47,371 --> 01:17:49,123
{\an2}Okay, Mr. Batman.
1924
01:17:49,290 --> 01:17:50,958
{\an2}Hold still while I scan you.
1925
01:17:51,208 --> 01:17:52,877
{\an2}[mimics beeping]
Scanning for badness.
1926
01:17:53,085 --> 01:17:54,086
{\an2}Yes, sir?
1927
01:17:54,253 --> 01:17:56,088
{\an2}-You're super nimble, right?-I sure am!
1928
01:17:56,255 --> 01:17:58,257
{\an2}And 110% expendable?
1929
01:17:58,424 --> 01:18:00,217
{\an2}I don't know what that means, but okay.
1930
01:18:00,384 --> 01:18:01,385
{\an2}-How'd I do, Dad?-Mediocre.
1931
01:18:01,552 --> 01:18:03,304
{\an2}-Yes!-And don't call me Dad.
1932
01:18:03,762 --> 01:18:04,763
{\an2}Sorry.
1933
01:18:06,724 --> 01:18:09,226
{\an2}[Batman] Alfred, put that kidon the next jet to the orphanage.
1934
01:18:09,935 --> 01:18:14,190
{\an2}But doesn't he deserve a chancefor someone to take him under their wing,
1935
01:18:14,565 --> 01:18:17,401
{\an2}as I took you under mine?
1936
01:18:17,735 --> 01:18:19,570
{\an2}Listen, you don't have a family.
1937
01:18:19,904 --> 01:18:22,406
{\an2}So what do you know abouthaving a surrogate son?
1938
01:18:26,035 --> 01:18:27,036
{\an2}[Barbara] Batman!
1939
01:18:27,870 --> 01:18:29,914
{\an2}We have to stick together.
1940
01:18:30,664 --> 01:18:31,749
{\an2}Please.
1941
01:18:34,043 --> 01:18:37,254
{\an2}[Batman] Joker, you mean nothing to me.
1942
01:18:39,840 --> 01:18:41,091
{\an2}No one does.
1943
01:18:45,054 --> 01:18:47,932
{\an2}Huh. You're not a traditional bad guy.
1944
01:18:48,766 --> 01:18:51,227
{\an2}But you're not exactly a good guy, either.
1945
01:18:51,435 --> 01:18:52,561
{\an2}[Barbara] Batman?
[Robin] Padre?
1946
01:18:53,020 --> 01:18:54,605
{\an2}[Phyllis] You even abandoned your friends.
1947
01:18:54,813 --> 01:18:55,856
{\an2}What?
1948
01:18:56,023 --> 01:18:57,441
{\an2}Go on, Scuttler. Go.
1949
01:18:57,608 --> 01:18:59,109
{\an2}-Batman, no. No!-Don't do this!
1950
01:18:59,276 --> 01:19:00,653
{\an2}Abandoned? No.
1951
01:19:00,819 --> 01:19:02,404
{\an2}No, I was trying to protect them.
1952
01:19:02,571 --> 01:19:04,365
{\an2}[Phyllis] By pushing them away?
1953
01:19:04,531 --> 01:19:05,741
{\an2}Well, yeah.
1954
01:19:06,909 --> 01:19:09,411
{\an2}Are they reallythe ones you're protecting?
1955
01:19:12,623 --> 01:19:14,500
{\an2}[Barbara] Computer, Batman's in danger.
1956
01:19:14,667 --> 01:19:16,543
{\an2}[Robin] Please, Computer, take us back!
1957
01:19:16,710 --> 01:19:18,796
{\an2}Do you really want the manwho made you to come to harm?
1958
01:19:19,004 --> 01:19:21,131
{\an2}[Puter] Batman programmed meto obey him.
1959
01:19:21,298 --> 01:19:23,133
{\an2}But he didn't say to not not rescue him.
1960
01:19:23,300 --> 01:19:24,593
{\an2}What are they doing?
1961
01:19:24,760 --> 01:19:26,053
{\an2}Come on, guys. Let's hustle.
1962
01:19:26,220 --> 01:19:28,430
{\an2}Gotham City's not gonna blow itself up.
1963
01:19:29,431 --> 01:19:31,016
{\an2}Well, hello!
1964
01:19:36,563 --> 01:19:38,732
{\an2}'Puter, go to super-secret stealth mode.
1965
01:19:38,899 --> 01:19:41,819
{\an2}-[roars]
-[all screaming]
1966
01:19:41,986 --> 01:19:43,737
{\an2}-Hold on!
-No!
1967
01:19:43,904 --> 01:19:47,324
{\an2}Evil buddies, those are my last three
painful reminders of Batman.
1968
01:19:47,491 --> 01:19:48,909
{\an2}Run!
1969
01:19:49,076 --> 01:19:50,369
{\an2}Come on, Alfred. This way.
1970
01:19:50,536 --> 01:19:51,787
{\an2}Wait, where's Dick?
1971
01:19:51,954 --> 01:19:53,122
{\an2}The little guy? He's over there.
1972
01:19:53,289 --> 01:19:54,581
{\an2}[Puter] Initializing Batcaveoperating system.
1973
01:19:54,748 --> 01:19:56,000
{\an2}What's he doing?
1974
01:19:56,166 --> 01:19:57,710
{\an2}I've gotta save my family!
1975
01:19:57,876 --> 01:19:58,877
{\an2}Just think.
1976
01:19:59,044 --> 01:20:01,005
{\an2}-What would Batman do?
-What?
1977
01:20:01,171 --> 01:20:04,133
{\an2}I know. Not listen to anyone else.
Be mean to people.
1978
01:20:04,383 --> 01:20:06,051
{\an2}Destroy as much property as possible.
1979
01:20:06,218 --> 01:20:08,178
{\an2}Talk in a really low, gravelly voice.
1980
01:20:08,345 --> 01:20:09,888
{\an2}And go it alone.
1981
01:20:10,055 --> 01:20:11,181
{\an2}Kid, don't do that.
1982
01:20:11,348 --> 01:20:12,766
{\an2}[Puter] Atomic batteries to power.
1983
01:20:12,933 --> 01:20:13,934
{\an2}Turbines to speed.
1984
01:20:14,101 --> 01:20:15,102
{\an2}Don't do what I would do!
1985
01:20:15,269 --> 01:20:16,687
{\an2}I never even taught you how to drive!
1986
01:20:16,854 --> 01:20:18,647
{\an2}Hold on a second, Brick Lady.
1987
01:20:18,814 --> 01:20:21,108
{\an2}[stammering] I'm so sorry.
I need to get down there and stop this.
1988
01:20:21,275 --> 01:20:23,819
{\an2}I can't let you go.My boss will be really mad at me.
1989
01:20:23,986 --> 01:20:25,487
{\an2}Yeah. But I bet
your boss would be happy
1990
01:20:25,654 --> 01:20:27,531
{\an2}if you were able to get
all those bad guys back in here.
1991
01:20:27,948 --> 01:20:29,199
{\an2}Hmm. She sure would.
1992
01:20:29,366 --> 01:20:31,744
{\an2}Then let me try.
Let me get down there and help them.
1993
01:20:31,910 --> 01:20:33,871
{\an2}But haven't you tried that before?
1994
01:20:35,497 --> 01:20:36,874
{\an2}[Barbara] This way, Alfred.
1995
01:20:38,417 --> 01:20:41,045
{\an2}You do the same thing over and over.
1996
01:20:42,296 --> 01:20:44,882
{\an2}-[screaming]
-[roaring]
1997
01:20:45,090 --> 01:20:46,550
{\an2}What's gonna change?
1998
01:20:46,717 --> 01:20:47,760
{\an2}No!
1999
01:20:49,636 --> 01:20:51,472
{\an2}I know what I need to do.
2000
01:20:51,638 --> 01:20:53,891
{\an2}Just give me 24 hours,
and I'll come back.
2001
01:20:54,808 --> 01:20:56,226
{\an2}Whoa!
2002
01:20:56,435 --> 01:20:58,228
{\an2}You've gotta let me go
down there and save them.
2003
01:21:00,856 --> 01:21:01,857
{\an2}I'll do whatever you want.
2004
01:21:02,024 --> 01:21:03,025
{\an2}[grunting]
2005
01:21:03,192 --> 01:21:05,319
{\an2}-Please.
-[Daleks] Exterminate!
2006
01:21:05,486 --> 01:21:06,487
{\an2}Please.
2007
01:21:06,653 --> 01:21:08,572
{\an2}Okay, but I need all the bad guyslocked up in here.
2008
01:21:08,739 --> 01:21:09,948
{\an2}I promise.
2009
01:21:12,409 --> 01:21:14,578
{\an2}And I mean all of them.
2010
01:21:16,080 --> 01:21:17,581
{\an2}One of these buttons
has to save my friends.
2011
01:21:18,457 --> 01:21:19,500
{\an2}[Puter] Self-destruct mode activated.
2012
01:21:19,666 --> 01:21:20,667
{\an2}Self what?
2013
01:21:20,876 --> 01:21:21,877
{\an2}[Robin screaming]
2014
01:21:22,044 --> 01:21:23,754
{\an2}-Master Dick!
-No!
2015
01:21:23,921 --> 01:21:25,297
{\an2}-[continues screaming]
-[roaring]
2016
01:21:26,131 --> 01:21:27,758
{\an2}-Dick!
-[screaming]
2017
01:21:27,925 --> 01:21:29,718
{\an2}Look who's bat!
2018
01:21:31,345 --> 01:21:32,763
{\an2}[Robin] What?
2019
01:21:35,224 --> 01:21:36,892
{\an2}[all grunting]
2020
01:21:41,146 --> 01:21:43,607
{\an2}Everyone okay? Dick, Alfred, Barbara.
2021
01:21:43,774 --> 01:21:45,776
{\an2}-Are you guys--
-We're fine, Batman.
2022
01:21:48,570 --> 01:21:51,782
{\an2}Listen, I just wanted to say
2023
01:21:54,660 --> 01:21:56,286
{\an2}that I'm really,
2024
01:21:57,413 --> 01:21:59,623
{\an2}really, really,
2025
01:22:01,291 --> 01:22:02,793
{\an2}really, really, really,
2026
01:22:02,960 --> 01:22:04,294
{\an2}really, really...
2027
01:22:05,462 --> 01:22:07,047
{\an2}s-s-s...
2028
01:22:08,090 --> 01:22:09,299
{\an2}[clears throat]
2029
01:22:10,300 --> 01:22:13,262
{\an2}Soooo...
2030
01:22:14,721 --> 01:22:15,722
{\an2}Sorry?
2031
01:22:15,889 --> 01:22:17,933
{\an2}Yeah. Whoo! I did it!
2032
01:22:19,393 --> 01:22:20,436
{\an2}[sighs]
2033
01:22:21,061 --> 01:22:23,313
{\an2}I don't even know why
you bothered coming back.
2034
01:22:26,191 --> 01:22:27,818
{\an2}[Batman] I was
2035
01:22:28,652 --> 01:22:29,653
{\an2}afraid.
2036
01:22:30,654 --> 01:22:31,822
{\an2}What?
2037
01:22:33,657 --> 01:22:35,492
{\an2}The reason I came back
2038
01:22:36,160 --> 01:22:37,995
{\an2}was the same reason I left you.
2039
01:22:41,039 --> 01:22:42,708
{\an2}I was afraid
2040
01:22:44,168 --> 01:22:45,752
{\an2}of feeling
2041
01:22:47,004 --> 01:22:49,381
{\an2}the pain you feel
2042
01:22:50,841 --> 01:22:52,551
{\an2}when you lose
2043
01:22:53,719 --> 01:22:56,138
{\an2}someone close to you.
2044
01:23:04,021 --> 01:23:06,064
{\an2}Gotham needs us.
2045
01:23:06,607 --> 01:23:09,735
{\an2}So I came back to do this.
2046
01:23:10,319 --> 01:23:11,320
{\an2}Flip.
2047
01:23:12,946 --> 01:23:14,781
{\an2}Flip? What is that? I don't...
2048
01:23:15,157 --> 01:23:16,492
{\an2}You gotta turn around.
2049
01:23:18,494 --> 01:23:21,038
{\an2}I call it the Babs-Signal.
2050
01:23:21,205 --> 01:23:23,707
{\an2}And I'm flipping the switch for you.
2051
01:23:23,874 --> 01:23:27,920
{\an2}Because saving this city
is too big a job for one person.
2052
01:23:28,086 --> 01:23:29,546
{\an2}Flip, flip.
2053
01:23:34,426 --> 01:23:36,762
{\an2}So, what do you say, Commish?
2054
01:23:36,929 --> 01:23:39,556
{\an2}Will you work with me?
2055
01:23:40,098 --> 01:23:41,850
{\an2}I need your help.
2056
01:23:43,227 --> 01:23:45,062
{\an2}I thought you'd never ask.
2057
01:23:46,563 --> 01:23:49,233
{\an2}I'm very, very proud of you, sir.
2058
01:23:49,399 --> 01:23:53,570
{\an2}But there's still only four of us
against Joker's entire army.
2059
01:23:53,737 --> 01:23:55,739
{\an2}That's why I called in some backup.
2060
01:23:55,906 --> 01:23:57,908
{\an2}Flip! Flip! Flip! Flip!
2061
01:23:59,243 --> 01:24:01,328
{\an2}-Whoa!
-[Clayface] We saw your signal,
2062
01:24:01,537 --> 01:24:02,538
{\an2}and we came to help.
2063
01:24:02,913 --> 01:24:05,582
{\an2}Joker may be done with us,
but we're not done with him.
2064
01:24:05,749 --> 01:24:07,918
{\an2}We will be the Joker's reckoning.
2065
01:24:08,085 --> 01:24:10,087
{\an2}Joker said mean stuff to us.
2066
01:24:10,462 --> 01:24:12,089
{\an2}You were right, Barbara.
2067
01:24:12,256 --> 01:24:14,967
{\an2}It takes a village. Not a Batman.
2068
01:24:15,217 --> 01:24:16,510
{\an2}[all cheer]
2069
01:24:17,553 --> 01:24:19,429
{\an2}Okay. Everybody, listen up.
2070
01:24:19,596 --> 01:24:23,308
{\an2}These monsters want to destroyGotham City.
2071
01:24:23,475 --> 01:24:25,602
{\an2}[Batman] That's right.We need sick new vehicles.
2072
01:24:25,769 --> 01:24:27,771
{\an2}[Barbara] An arsenal of advanced weaponry.
2073
01:24:27,938 --> 01:24:30,440
{\an2}Costumes that suit
our individual personalities.
2074
01:24:30,607 --> 01:24:31,608
{\an2}Rip!
2075
01:24:31,775 --> 01:24:33,902
{\an2}And code names
to use on our walkie-talkies.
2076
01:24:34,069 --> 01:24:35,070
{\an2}Call it out!
2077
01:24:35,237 --> 01:24:36,530
{\an2}Your name is Lady Bat.
2078
01:24:36,697 --> 01:24:37,781
{\an2}-Lady Bat?
-[Batman] Bat Lady.
2079
01:24:37,948 --> 01:24:40,826
{\an2}-Veto! Nope. What?
-[Batman] El Batarina. Soccer Mom... Bat?
2080
01:24:41,034 --> 01:24:42,619
{\an2}How about a cool costume?
2081
01:24:42,786 --> 01:24:43,787
{\an2}Nice!
2082
01:24:43,996 --> 01:24:45,372
{\an2}That one's called Batgirl.
2083
01:24:45,539 --> 01:24:47,624
{\an2}If you call me Batgirl,
can I call you Batboy?
2084
01:24:47,791 --> 01:24:50,294
{\an2}And lastly, a coordinated attack strategy,
2085
01:24:50,460 --> 01:24:51,962
{\an2}and a kick-butt theme song!
2086
01:24:52,129 --> 01:24:53,130
{\an2}Robin?
2087
01:24:53,797 --> 01:24:55,465
{\an2}[gasps] My superhero code name.
2088
01:24:55,632 --> 01:24:56,883
{\an2}Oh, yeah. Hit it!
2089
01:24:57,050 --> 01:24:58,051
{\an2}Got it!
2090
01:24:58,218 --> 01:24:59,845
{\an2}['80s pop song playing]
2091
01:25:00,137 --> 01:25:02,431
{\an2}-No!
-[other '80s pop song playing]
2092
01:25:03,515 --> 01:25:05,559
{\an2}-[groans]
-[Robin song playing]
2093
01:25:05,767 --> 01:25:06,810
{\an2}Absolutely not.
2094
01:25:06,977 --> 01:25:09,396
{\an2}-[pop music playing]
-[growling]
2095
01:25:09,813 --> 01:25:12,941
{\an2}This music is filling me with rage.
2096
01:25:13,108 --> 01:25:14,484
{\an2}Let's use it!
2097
01:25:15,944 --> 01:25:18,071
{\an2}All right, team. I'm going to need to
know your special powers.
2098
01:25:18,238 --> 01:25:19,239
{\an2}I'm a giant clay person!
2099
01:25:19,406 --> 01:25:21,074
{\an2}-I'm irritating.
-I have a sack for a face.
2100
01:25:21,241 --> 01:25:22,326
{\an2}I make unpredictable decisions.
2101
01:25:22,492 --> 01:25:23,493
{\an2}I raise the stakes!
2102
01:25:23,660 --> 01:25:24,953
{\an2}I can squirt ketchup!
2103
01:25:25,120 --> 01:25:26,538
{\an2}Nice! Orca.
2104
01:25:26,705 --> 01:25:28,290
{\an2}I'm a whale!
2105
01:25:28,457 --> 01:25:29,916
{\an2}Oh, we got this covered!
2106
01:25:30,083 --> 01:25:31,126
{\an2}Go team!
2107
01:25:32,794 --> 01:25:33,795
{\an2}[all whooping]
2108
01:25:33,962 --> 01:25:34,963
{\an2}Whale, yeah!
2109
01:25:36,673 --> 01:25:37,841
{\an2}-[pop music continues playing]
-[all laughing]
2110
01:25:38,175 --> 01:25:39,926
{\an2}Shh. Quiet.
2111
01:25:40,093 --> 01:25:42,137
{\an2}Who's laying down those funky beats?
2112
01:25:42,304 --> 01:25:44,389
{\an2}[all] We are!
[Catwoman] Meow, meow!
2113
01:25:44,556 --> 01:25:45,849
{\an2}Batman?
2114
01:25:46,016 --> 01:25:47,809
{\an2}Evil army, get rid of them!
2115
01:25:48,685 --> 01:25:50,187
{\an2}Team Gotham Family,
2116
01:25:50,354 --> 01:25:51,438
{\an2}activate!
2117
01:25:51,605 --> 01:25:52,689
{\an2}Voldy's got this.
2118
01:25:55,108 --> 01:25:56,777
{\an2}[villains] Here we go!
2119
01:25:57,361 --> 01:25:58,695
{\an2}Yeah!
2120
01:26:00,030 --> 01:26:01,448
{\an2}[Voldemort] Bombarda!
2121
01:26:02,157 --> 01:26:03,492
{\an2}Smash! Smash! Smash!
2122
01:26:06,328 --> 01:26:09,122
{\an2}-Whoa.
-Batman, take out Joker's bomb.
2123
01:26:09,289 --> 01:26:10,874
{\an2}I'll get that Projector!
2124
01:26:11,041 --> 01:26:12,209
{\an2}[Batman] 10-4, Co-Go.
2125
01:26:13,460 --> 01:26:15,504
{\an2}Freeze, Clayface, take this guy out!
2126
01:26:15,879 --> 01:26:17,798
{\an2}Coming through!
2127
01:26:19,341 --> 01:26:20,801
{\an2}[yells]
2128
01:26:22,260 --> 01:26:23,804
{\an2}Okay, Alfred, bring the pain.
2129
01:26:23,970 --> 01:26:24,971
{\an2}[tires screeching]
2130
01:26:25,722 --> 01:26:28,725
{\an2}Bringing it, sir. For Queen and country!
2131
01:26:29,351 --> 01:26:30,352
{\an2}[laughs]
2132
01:26:30,644 --> 01:26:32,104
{\an2}You just got Union Jacked!
2133
01:26:34,773 --> 01:26:35,857
{\an2}Robin, get ready.
2134
01:26:36,024 --> 01:26:37,943
{\an2}I'm about to teach you
some father-and-son stuff.
2135
01:26:38,735 --> 01:26:40,112
{\an2}First, driving.
2136
01:26:40,278 --> 01:26:42,072
{\an2}-Put your hands at 10 and 2.
-Okay.
2137
01:26:42,239 --> 01:26:44,866
{\an2}Now, fly! Turn left!
2138
01:26:45,701 --> 01:26:47,077
{\an2}Run over these skeletons.
2139
01:26:47,244 --> 01:26:48,578
{\an2}Now drive up the wall!
2140
01:26:50,080 --> 01:26:51,915
{\an2}-Great driving.
-Thanks, Padre.
2141
01:26:53,417 --> 01:26:54,418
{\an2}Yeah!
2142
01:26:55,585 --> 01:26:56,670
{\an2}Okay, Robin.
2143
01:26:56,837 --> 01:26:58,922
{\an2}Together, we're gonna
punch these guys so hard,
2144
01:26:59,089 --> 01:27:00,590
{\an2}words describing the impact
2145
01:27:00,757 --> 01:27:03,593
{\an2}are gonna spontaneously materialize
out of thin air.
2146
01:27:03,760 --> 01:27:04,886
{\an2}Yeah!
2147
01:27:10,183 --> 01:27:11,518
{\an2}Yes! Yes! Yes!
2148
01:27:15,272 --> 01:27:16,231
{\an2}High five!
2149
01:27:16,565 --> 01:27:18,692
{\an2}Stop moving around, you Muggles.
2150
01:27:18,900 --> 01:27:21,027
{\an2}All right, team, let's shut him down.
2151
01:27:21,737 --> 01:27:23,780
{\an2}-Orca! You're up, baby!
-[Orca yells]
2152
01:27:24,364 --> 01:27:26,199
{\an2}You wanna see a magic trick?
2153
01:27:26,366 --> 01:27:28,160
{\an2}I'm gonna make you disappear.
2154
01:27:28,326 --> 01:27:31,079
{\an2}-Wingardium Levio...
-Me-yoink!
2155
01:27:31,246 --> 01:27:33,165
{\an2}Wingardium Levio... Shut up!
2156
01:27:33,331 --> 01:27:34,332
{\an2}No!
2157
01:27:34,499 --> 01:27:36,126
{\an2}Welcome to the Phantom Zone, bad guy!
2158
01:27:36,293 --> 01:27:37,294
{\an2}Fudgecake!
2159
01:27:38,128 --> 01:27:39,629
{\an2}[Barbara] Whoo!
Here we go, Bat Team!
2160
01:27:39,796 --> 01:27:41,173
{\an2}Batman, think fast!
2161
01:27:44,301 --> 01:27:46,052
{\an2}Welcome to the Phantom Zone, bad guy!
2162
01:27:46,219 --> 01:27:47,220
{\an2}Robin, go long.
2163
01:27:47,387 --> 01:27:49,264
{\an2}-Nice grab.
-Yeah!
2164
01:27:51,308 --> 01:27:53,059
{\an2}[Phyllis] Oh, my gosh. Yes!
2165
01:27:53,226 --> 01:27:54,227
{\an2}Here you go, Grandpa.
2166
01:27:56,271 --> 01:27:57,272
{\an2}Hey, Batman!
2167
01:27:59,065 --> 01:28:00,650
{\an2}-[growling]
-[grunting]
2168
01:28:00,817 --> 01:28:02,778
{\an2}Get off my padre!
2169
01:28:04,070 --> 01:28:05,864
{\an2}It wasn't useless after all.
2170
01:28:06,031 --> 01:28:07,699
{\an2}End this, Batgirl!
2171
01:28:10,243 --> 01:28:12,162
{\an2}Adiós, shark.
2172
01:28:13,747 --> 01:28:15,916
{\an2}Okay, BRB, guys.
I'm gonna go defuse that--
2173
01:28:29,596 --> 01:28:31,264
{\an2}This is the end of Gotham City!
2174
01:28:32,557 --> 01:28:34,976
{\an2}As I predicted, we're doomed!
2175
01:28:36,353 --> 01:28:38,021
{\an2}We're not doomed. I got this.
2176
01:28:39,564 --> 01:28:40,816
{\an2}Everyone, grab on to me.
2177
01:28:40,982 --> 01:28:42,108
{\an2}Gotcha.
2178
01:28:42,275 --> 01:28:44,861
{\an2}Come on, guys.
We need to hold this city together.
2179
01:28:47,364 --> 01:28:48,615
{\an2}Batrope, no!
2180
01:28:48,782 --> 01:28:50,408
{\an2}Everybody, run!
2181
01:28:50,575 --> 01:28:52,577
{\an2}No! We have to stick together.
2182
01:28:52,744 --> 01:28:53,745
{\an2}Right, Batman?
2183
01:28:53,912 --> 01:28:55,205
{\an2}We need to use our heads!
2184
01:28:55,372 --> 01:28:56,915
{\an2}Maybe we should build something together.
2185
01:28:57,082 --> 01:28:58,250
{\an2}[Alfred] Heads.
[Barbara] Stick together.
2186
01:28:58,416 --> 01:29:00,252
{\an2}[Robin] Build something.
[Barbara] Together.
2187
01:29:00,418 --> 01:29:02,420
{\an2}-[echoing] Build.
-Together. Together.
2188
01:29:02,587 --> 01:29:04,047
{\an2}[Robin]
We should build something together.
2189
01:29:05,423 --> 01:29:06,466
{\an2}I got it.
2190
01:29:06,633 --> 01:29:09,553
{\an2}You're right, Babs.
We need to stick together.
2191
01:29:09,719 --> 01:29:11,054
{\an2}Literally.
2192
01:29:11,221 --> 01:29:12,430
{\an2}Robin, quick. Give me a boost.
2193
01:29:12,597 --> 01:29:13,598
{\an2}On it, Padre.
2194
01:29:13,765 --> 01:29:15,809
{\an2}We're gonna stick together,
using our heads,
2195
01:29:15,976 --> 01:29:18,353
{\an2}and the most powerful weapon of all.
2196
01:29:18,520 --> 01:29:20,939
{\an2}Shredded abs. Let's do this.
2197
01:29:21,106 --> 01:29:22,315
{\an2}[Catwoman] Meow, meow.
[all] Yeah, let's do this.
2198
01:29:22,524 --> 01:29:23,733
{\an2}-Ready?
-Here we go.
2199
01:29:23,900 --> 01:29:24,943
{\an2}You got this, Alfred?
2200
01:29:25,110 --> 01:29:26,862
{\an2}Yes, sir. Abs of steel.
2201
01:29:27,028 --> 01:29:29,072
{\an2}Great! Now you bend,
2202
01:29:29,281 --> 01:29:31,408
{\an2}and I'll grab the other side!
2203
01:29:32,325 --> 01:29:33,368
{\an2}No!
2204
01:29:33,535 --> 01:29:35,161
{\an2}[man] Batman, what's going on?
[Robin] Are you okay?
2205
01:29:35,787 --> 01:29:37,247
{\an2}[Clayface] I've got you.
2206
01:29:37,664 --> 01:29:38,999
{\an2}[straining]
2207
01:29:39,666 --> 01:29:40,667
{\an2}Joker!
2208
01:29:40,834 --> 01:29:42,836
{\an2}Please, help us!
2209
01:29:43,003 --> 01:29:44,588
{\an2}No! I'm not gonna help you.
2210
01:29:44,754 --> 01:29:48,550
{\an2}At least if this city is destroyed,
I'll die knowing
2211
01:29:48,717 --> 01:29:50,468
{\an2}I'm your greatest enemy!
2212
01:29:50,635 --> 01:29:52,679
{\an2}I'm gonna have to die to know it.
2213
01:29:52,846 --> 01:29:55,890
{\an2}Shut up, Joker! If there's no Gotham,
2214
01:29:56,057 --> 01:29:58,184
{\an2}then I'll never get to fight you again.
2215
01:29:59,311 --> 01:30:00,604
{\an2}What?
2216
01:30:01,479 --> 01:30:03,898
{\an2}You're the reason why I get up
at 4:00 in the afternoon
2217
01:30:04,065 --> 01:30:06,610
{\an2}and pump iron
until my chest is positively sick.
2218
01:30:07,193 --> 01:30:08,486
{\an2}You're the reason I've given up
2219
01:30:08,653 --> 01:30:11,823
{\an2}a life spent with Russian ballerinas
and lady activewear models.
2220
01:30:12,449 --> 01:30:13,825
{\an2}And if it wasn't for you,
2221
01:30:13,992 --> 01:30:17,245
{\an2}I never would have learned how connected
I am with all these people.
2222
01:30:18,246 --> 01:30:19,247
{\an2}And you.
2223
01:30:21,041 --> 01:30:23,543
{\an2}So if you help me save Gotham,
2224
01:30:25,795 --> 01:30:27,589
{\an2}you'll help me save us.
2225
01:30:28,590 --> 01:30:30,884
{\an2}You just said "us."
2226
01:30:31,051 --> 01:30:35,138
{\an2}Yeah. Batman and the Joker.
2227
01:30:36,973 --> 01:30:38,642
{\an2}What do you say?
2228
01:30:39,476 --> 01:30:41,478
{\an2}You had me at shut up.
2229
01:30:43,355 --> 01:30:44,648
{\an2}How are your abs, bro?
2230
01:30:44,814 --> 01:30:48,026
{\an2}Too much flab, not enough ab.
[chuckles] Why?
2231
01:30:48,193 --> 01:30:49,944
{\an2}Because I need you to crunch them.
2232
01:30:50,320 --> 01:30:51,738
{\an2}Citizens of Gotham,
2233
01:30:51,905 --> 01:30:56,701
{\an2}we need all of you to join us
and help bring this city back together.
2234
01:30:56,910 --> 01:30:58,912
{\an2}-[straining]
-[all straining]
2235
01:31:10,340 --> 01:31:11,883
{\an2}[all cheering]
2236
01:31:19,849 --> 01:31:21,267
{\an2}[whooping]
2237
01:31:22,894 --> 01:31:25,021
{\an2}I'm just gonna come right out and say it.
2238
01:31:25,188 --> 01:31:27,524
{\an2}-I hate you, Joker.
-[gasps]
2239
01:31:27,774 --> 01:31:29,651
{\an2}-I hate you, too.
-I hate you more.
2240
01:31:29,818 --> 01:31:31,528
{\an2}I hate you the most.
2241
01:31:31,695 --> 01:31:33,530
{\an2}I hate you forever.
2242
01:31:34,072 --> 01:31:35,115
{\an2}Splendid!
2243
01:31:36,783 --> 01:31:37,951
{\an2}We did it, everyone!
2244
01:31:42,706 --> 01:31:44,999
{\an2}[Bane] Bane is feeling warm and fuzzy.
2245
01:31:48,545 --> 01:31:49,796
{\an2}[thunder rumbling]
2246
01:31:50,046 --> 01:31:51,089
{\an2}[Robin] Padre,
2247
01:31:51,881 --> 01:31:53,007
{\an2}where are you going?
2248
01:31:54,134 --> 01:31:55,719
{\an2}I made a promise.
2249
01:31:55,885 --> 01:31:57,846
{\an2}I gotta go back to the Phantom Zone.
2250
01:31:58,888 --> 01:31:59,973
{\an2}Sorry, kid.
2251
01:32:00,140 --> 01:32:02,058
{\an2}Padre, please.
2252
01:32:02,225 --> 01:32:04,227
{\an2}Don't call me Padre.
2253
01:32:04,769 --> 01:32:06,187
{\an2}Okay.
2254
01:32:06,730 --> 01:32:07,856
{\an2}Call me...
2255
01:32:11,901 --> 01:32:13,069
{\an2}Dads.
2256
01:32:13,319 --> 01:32:16,990
{\an2}[gasps] My two dads are the same dad.
2257
01:32:18,074 --> 01:32:20,785
{\an2}But they're both leaving.
2258
01:32:21,953 --> 01:32:23,580
{\an2}It's gonna be okay, kid.
2259
01:32:25,165 --> 01:32:27,667
{\an2}Sometimes, losing people is part of life.
2260
01:32:28,501 --> 01:32:31,421
{\an2}But that doesn't mean
you stop letting them in.
2261
01:32:32,172 --> 01:32:35,091
{\an2}Some very wise people taught me that.
2262
01:32:35,967 --> 01:32:37,469
{\an2}My father figure.
2263
01:32:39,012 --> 01:32:41,514
{\an2}My platonic coworker buddy,
2264
01:32:41,681 --> 01:32:44,267
{\an2}who's a girl, but just a friend.
2265
01:32:45,935 --> 01:32:47,145
{\an2}And you.
2266
01:32:47,937 --> 01:32:49,272
{\an2}Mi hijo.
2267
01:32:49,939 --> 01:32:51,316
{\an2}It's Spanish
2268
01:32:52,108 --> 01:32:53,485
{\an2}for "son."
2269
01:32:55,612 --> 01:32:57,363
{\an2}This is my family,
2270
01:32:58,615 --> 01:33:00,492
{\an2}but it's your family, too.
2271
01:33:10,001 --> 01:33:11,461
{\an2}[sniffles]
2272
01:33:39,364 --> 01:33:40,740
{\an2}[thunder rumbling]
2273
01:33:59,217 --> 01:34:00,218
{\an2}[thuds]
2274
01:34:03,012 --> 01:34:04,013
{\an2}[grunts]
2275
01:34:04,889 --> 01:34:06,140
{\an2}Do you have a knife?
2276
01:34:06,307 --> 01:34:07,308
{\an2}Why?
2277
01:34:07,475 --> 01:34:11,020
{\an2}'Cause someone needs to cut the tension
between the two of us immediately.
2278
01:34:11,187 --> 01:34:12,188
{\an2}[groans]
2279
01:34:12,355 --> 01:34:13,857
{\an2}Okay. I deserved that.
2280
01:34:14,023 --> 01:34:15,400
{\an2}-[Phyllis] Hi.
-Wait a minute.
2281
01:34:15,567 --> 01:34:16,609
{\an2}What's going on?
2282
01:34:16,776 --> 01:34:19,112
{\an2}I came back, just like I said I would.
2283
01:34:19,279 --> 01:34:20,905
{\an2}You know, Mr. Batman... [sighs]
2284
01:34:21,072 --> 01:34:23,533
{\an2}When you're a talking brick,working at the Phantom Zone,
2285
01:34:23,700 --> 01:34:26,244
{\an2}you see a lot of crazy things.
2286
01:34:26,411 --> 01:34:28,538
{\an2}But I've finally seen a man,
2287
01:34:28,705 --> 01:34:30,540
{\an2}in order to make the worlda better place,
2288
01:34:30,707 --> 01:34:33,209
{\an2}take a look at himselfand make a change.
2289
01:34:34,252 --> 01:34:35,253
{\an2}Who?
2290
01:34:35,628 --> 01:34:37,547
{\an2}-Superman.
-What?
2291
01:34:37,714 --> 01:34:38,965
{\an2}I'm kidding. It's you.
2292
01:34:39,132 --> 01:34:40,383
{\an2}[all cheering]
2293
01:34:40,592 --> 01:34:41,885
{\an2}[laughs]
2294
01:34:42,427 --> 01:34:44,721
{\an2}Well, I guess I'll be seeing you
on the streets, Batman.
2295
01:34:44,888 --> 01:34:46,890
{\an2}I guess so. Catch you later, Joker.
2296
01:34:47,056 --> 01:34:48,224
{\an2}Let's go, gang.
2297
01:34:48,391 --> 01:34:49,392
{\an2}[chuckles] Wait a minute,
2298
01:34:49,809 --> 01:34:51,895
{\an2}we're not just gonna
let these criminals go, right?
2299
01:34:52,061 --> 01:34:53,605
{\an2}Ah, come on, Commish. Let's face it.
2300
01:34:53,771 --> 01:34:55,732
{\an2}Those guys are no match
for the four of us.
2301
01:34:55,899 --> 01:34:57,567
{\an2}We'll give them a 30-minute head start.
2302
01:34:57,734 --> 01:35:00,278
{\an2}Besides, you can't fight crime
on an empty stomach.
2303
01:35:00,528 --> 01:35:02,238
{\an2}[pop music playing]
2304
01:35:03,239 --> 01:35:04,449
{\an2}Hey, Computer?
2305
01:35:04,616 --> 01:35:05,825
{\an2}[all] We're home!
2306
01:35:05,992 --> 01:35:06,993
{\an2}[echoing]
2307
01:35:09,454 --> 01:35:10,622
{\an2}[Puter] What is the password?
2308
01:35:10,788 --> 01:35:12,415
{\an2}[all] Iron Man sucks!
2309
01:35:13,750 --> 01:35:14,959
{\an2}[laughing]
2310
01:35:24,594 --> 01:35:27,430
{\an2}When Dad and me were fighting,
I was giving them my best one-liners.
2311
01:35:28,306 --> 01:35:29,307
{\an2}You
2312
01:35:31,434 --> 01:35:32,769
{\an2}complete me.
2313
01:35:33,102 --> 01:35:34,604
{\an2}[all laughing]
2314
01:35:46,324 --> 01:35:49,369
{\an2}Holy family photo, Batman. I love it!
2315
01:35:56,334 --> 01:35:57,460
{\an2}[Batman] White.
2316
01:35:57,627 --> 01:36:01,798
{\an2}All important movies endwith a white screen.
2317
01:36:02,340 --> 01:36:04,467
{\an2}And tying up loose ends.
2318
01:36:04,634 --> 01:36:06,678
{\an2}We're coming for you, Gotham City!
2319
01:36:06,844 --> 01:36:08,304
{\an2}[Batman] Like this snake clowns bit.
2320
01:36:08,471 --> 01:36:10,473
{\an2}[Barbara] Snake clowns?
[Batman] Told you they were real.
2321
01:36:10,640 --> 01:36:12,850
{\an2}[Barbara] Did you stick wigs onto snakes?
2322
01:36:13,017 --> 01:36:14,644
{\an2}[Batman] Maybe.
[Barbara] That is so weird.
2323
01:36:14,978 --> 01:36:16,521
{\an2}[Robin] Can I play that songI wrote for the end credits?
2324
01:36:16,771 --> 01:36:17,855
{\an2}[Batman] That is a hard pass.
[Robin] Come on.
2325
01:36:18,106 --> 01:36:19,107
{\an2}[Batman] No!
2326
01:36:19,315 --> 01:36:20,525
{\an2}[Barbara] Let the kid playwhatever music he wants.
2327
01:36:20,817 --> 01:36:21,818
{\an2}[Batman] No, no, no!
[Robin] Please?
2328
01:36:21,985 --> 01:36:22,986
{\an2}[Batman] No.
[Robin] Padre?
2329
01:36:23,361 --> 01:36:24,862
{\an2}[Batman sighs] Fine. 'Puter.
2330
01:36:25,446 --> 01:36:26,447
{\an2}-[beeps]
-[Puter] Okay, sir.
2331
01:36:26,614 --> 01:36:27,949
{\an2}-[Robin] Yay!
-[upbeat music playing]
2332
01:36:28,157 --> 01:36:30,493
{\an2}[Puter] Now playingRobin's happy, poppy music.
2333
01:36:30,660 --> 01:36:33,871
{\an2}The kind that makesparents and studio executives happy.
2334
01:36:37,333 --> 01:36:38,334
{\an2}[groans]
2335
01:36:57,895 --> 01:36:58,896
{\an2}Come on, everyone!
2336
01:37:18,291 --> 01:37:19,625
{\an8}-Come on, Batman!
-No!
2337
01:38:13,387 --> 01:38:14,722
{\an8}[playing guitar solo]
2338
01:38:46,045 --> 01:38:49,382
{\an2}[Batman laughing]
Wow, that was fun!
2339
01:38:49,549 --> 01:38:51,926
{\an2}Really hope nobody was recording that.
2340
01:38:52,093 --> 01:38:54,637
{\an2}Let me see. Oh, this thing is on.This thing is recording.
199147
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