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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:35,619 --> 00:00:39,372 Long ago, in the faraway land of ancient Greece, 2 00:00:39,456 --> 00:00:44,919 there was a golden age of powerful gods and extraordinary heroes. 3 00:00:45,003 --> 00:00:50,883 And the greatest and strongest of all these heroes was the mighty Hercules. 4 00:00:50,968 --> 00:00:54,470 But what is the measure of a true hero? 5 00:00:54,555 --> 00:00:57,557 - That is what our story is... - Will you listen to him? 6 00:00:57,641 --> 00:01:00,560 He's makin' the story sound like some Greek tragedy. 7 00:01:00,644 --> 00:01:04,230 - Lighten up, dude. - We'll take it from here, darling. 8 00:01:04,314 --> 00:01:07,567 You go, girl. 9 00:01:07,651 --> 00:01:13,656 We are the Muses, goddesses of the arts and proclaimers of heroes. 10 00:01:13,741 --> 00:01:15,533 Heroes like Hercules. 11 00:01:15,617 --> 00:01:17,577 Honey, you mean "Hunk-ules." 12 00:01:17,661 --> 00:01:19,912 I'd like to make some sweet music with him... 13 00:01:19,997 --> 00:01:26,961 Our story actually begins long before Hercules, many aeons ago. 14 00:01:28,756 --> 00:01:31,841 Back when the world was new 15 00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:34,761 The planet Earth was down on its luck 16 00:01:34,845 --> 00:01:40,683 And everywhere gigantic brutes called Titans ran amok 17 00:01:40,768 --> 00:01:43,936 It was a nasty place 18 00:01:44,021 --> 00:01:46,939 There was a mess wherever you stepped 19 00:01:47,024 --> 00:01:52,278 Where chaos reigned and the earthquakes and volcanoes never slept 20 00:01:52,362 --> 00:01:53,362 Say it, girlfriend! 21 00:01:53,447 --> 00:01:55,072 And then along came Zeus 22 00:01:55,157 --> 00:01:57,950 - He hurled his thunderbolt - He zapped 23 00:01:58,035 --> 00:02:00,953 - Locked those suckers in a vault - They're trapped 24 00:02:01,038 --> 00:02:05,416 And on his own stopped chaos in its tracks 25 00:02:05,501 --> 00:02:06,959 And that's the gospel truth 26 00:02:07,044 --> 00:02:11,547 The guy was too "Type A" to just relax 27 00:02:11,632 --> 00:02:13,508 And that's the world's first dish 28 00:02:13,592 --> 00:02:14,592 Yeah, baby. 29 00:02:14,676 --> 00:02:17,470 Zeus tamed the globe while still in his youth 30 00:02:17,554 --> 00:02:20,515 Though, honey it may seem impossible 31 00:02:20,599 --> 00:02:23,810 That's the gospel truth 32 00:02:23,894 --> 00:02:28,523 On Mount Olympus life was neat And smooth as sweet vermouth 33 00:02:29,566 --> 00:02:32,693 Although, honey it may seem impossible 34 00:02:32,778 --> 00:02:39,116 That's the gospel truth 35 00:02:40,953 --> 00:02:45,456 Yeah, yeah 36 00:02:45,541 --> 00:02:47,708 Hey, hey, hey 37 00:02:49,586 --> 00:02:52,296 Hey, yeah 38 00:03:18,532 --> 00:03:20,700 Hercules! 39 00:03:21,785 --> 00:03:24,120 Behave yourself. 40 00:03:27,541 --> 00:03:29,458 Look at this. 41 00:03:29,543 --> 00:03:31,794 Look how cute he is. 42 00:03:37,467 --> 00:03:40,761 He's strong like his dad. 43 00:03:40,846 --> 00:03:45,057 Excuse me! Hot stuff coming through! Excuse me. One side, Ares. 44 00:03:45,142 --> 00:03:48,728 Why, Hermes, they're lovely. 45 00:03:48,812 --> 00:03:51,272 Yeah, you know, I had Orpheus do the arrangement. 46 00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:53,566 Isn't that too nutty? 47 00:03:53,650 --> 00:03:54,775 Fabulous party. You know, 48 00:03:54,860 --> 00:03:58,821 I haven't seen this much love in a room since Narcissus discovered himself. 49 00:04:01,325 --> 00:04:04,160 Dear, keep those away from the baby. 50 00:04:04,244 --> 00:04:06,412 He won't hurt himself. 51 00:04:06,496 --> 00:04:08,956 Let the kid have a little fun. 52 00:04:18,008 --> 00:04:19,675 On behalf of my son, 53 00:04:19,760 --> 00:04:24,263 I want to thank you all for your wonderful gifts! 54 00:04:24,348 --> 00:04:26,015 What about our gift, dear? 55 00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:29,268 Well, let's see here. We'll take... Yes. 56 00:04:29,353 --> 00:04:33,940 A little cirrus and a touch of nimbostratus 57 00:04:34,024 --> 00:04:37,526 and a dash of cumulus. 58 00:04:41,198 --> 00:04:44,450 His name is Pegasus, 59 00:04:44,534 --> 00:04:47,745 and he's all yours, son. 60 00:04:59,216 --> 00:05:01,092 Mind his head. 61 00:05:01,176 --> 00:05:03,094 He's so tiny. 62 00:05:08,225 --> 00:05:10,142 My boy. 63 00:05:10,227 --> 00:05:13,270 My little Hercules. 64 00:05:14,189 --> 00:05:15,898 How sentimental. 65 00:05:16,984 --> 00:05:19,652 You know, I haven't been this choked up 66 00:05:19,736 --> 00:05:23,239 since I got a hunk of moussaka caught in my throat! 67 00:05:25,033 --> 00:05:26,909 So is this an audience or a mosaic? 68 00:05:26,994 --> 00:05:29,453 Hey, how you doin'? Lookin' good. Nice dress. 69 00:05:29,538 --> 00:05:34,000 So, Hades, you finally made it. How are things in the underworld? 70 00:05:34,084 --> 00:05:37,003 Well, they're just fine. You know, a little dark, a little gloomy. 71 00:05:37,087 --> 00:05:39,255 And, as always, hey, full of dead people. 72 00:05:39,339 --> 00:05:40,506 What are you gonna do? 73 00:05:40,590 --> 00:05:43,384 There's the little sunspot. Little snootchie. 74 00:05:43,468 --> 00:05:46,554 And here is a sucker for the little sucker, eh? 75 00:05:46,638 --> 00:05:48,431 Here you go. Ya just... 76 00:05:52,728 --> 00:05:54,562 Powerful little tyke. 77 00:05:54,646 --> 00:05:58,357 Come on, Hades. Don't be such a stiff. Join the celebration! 78 00:05:58,442 --> 00:05:59,608 Hey. 79 00:05:59,693 --> 00:06:03,904 Love to, babe, but unlike you gods lounging about up here, 80 00:06:03,989 --> 00:06:06,532 I regrettably have a full-time gig 81 00:06:06,616 --> 00:06:10,161 that you, by the way, so charitably bestowed on me, Zeus. 82 00:06:10,245 --> 00:06:13,247 So, can't. Love to, but can't. 83 00:06:13,331 --> 00:06:17,251 You ought to slow down. You'll work yourself to death. 84 00:06:17,335 --> 00:06:20,296 Work yourself to death! 85 00:06:22,424 --> 00:06:24,258 I kill myself! 86 00:06:24,676 --> 00:06:28,054 If only. If only. 87 00:06:28,138 --> 00:06:32,308 If there's one god you don't want to get steamed up, it's Hades. 88 00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:35,102 'Cause he had an evil plan. 89 00:06:35,187 --> 00:06:39,690 He ran the underworld 90 00:06:39,775 --> 00:06:43,569 But thought the dead were dull and uncouth 91 00:06:43,653 --> 00:06:47,114 He was as mean as he was ruthless 92 00:06:47,199 --> 00:06:51,160 And that's the gospel truth 93 00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:55,581 He had a plan to shake things up 94 00:06:55,665 --> 00:07:02,671 And that's the gospel truth 95 00:07:11,181 --> 00:07:12,348 Pain! 96 00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:15,851 Coming, your most lugubriousness. 97 00:07:19,147 --> 00:07:20,106 Panic! 98 00:07:20,190 --> 00:07:23,025 I'm sorry. I can handle it! 99 00:07:30,450 --> 00:07:33,369 - Pain! - And Panic! 100 00:07:33,453 --> 00:07:35,287 - Reporting for duty! - Reporting for duty! 101 00:07:35,372 --> 00:07:36,372 Fine, fine, fine. 102 00:07:36,456 --> 00:07:39,708 Just let me know the instant the Fates arrive. 103 00:07:39,793 --> 00:07:40,918 They're here. 104 00:07:41,002 --> 00:07:44,421 What? The Fates are here, and you didn't tell me? 105 00:07:45,507 --> 00:07:50,553 - We are worms! Worthless worms! - We are worms! Worthless worms! 106 00:07:50,637 --> 00:07:55,182 Memo to me, memo to me. Maim you after my meeting. 107 00:07:57,352 --> 00:08:02,648 Darling, hold that mortal's thread of life 108 00:08:02,732 --> 00:08:05,526 good and tight. 109 00:08:09,614 --> 00:08:11,240 Incoming! 110 00:08:20,041 --> 00:08:22,668 Ladies! I am so sorry that I'm... 111 00:08:22,752 --> 00:08:23,752 - Late! - Late! 112 00:08:23,837 --> 00:08:27,047 - We knew you would be. - We know everything. 113 00:08:27,132 --> 00:08:29,216 - Past. - Present. 114 00:08:29,301 --> 00:08:31,343 And Future. 115 00:08:31,428 --> 00:08:34,305 Indoor plumbing, it's gonna be big. 116 00:08:34,389 --> 00:08:37,141 Great, great. Anyway, see, ladies, I was at this party, and I lost track of... 117 00:08:37,225 --> 00:08:40,519 - We know! - Yeah. I know you know. 118 00:08:40,604 --> 00:08:44,190 So here's the deal. Zeus, 119 00:08:44,274 --> 00:08:48,027 Mr High and Mighty, Mr "Hey, you, get off of my cloud," now he has... 120 00:08:48,111 --> 00:08:51,614 - A bouncing baby brat. - We know! 121 00:08:51,698 --> 00:08:55,868 I know you know. I know. I got it. I got the concept. 122 00:08:55,952 --> 00:08:56,911 So let me just ask. 123 00:08:56,995 --> 00:09:00,080 Is this kid gonna mess up my hostile takeover bid, or what? 124 00:09:00,165 --> 00:09:01,248 What do you think? 125 00:09:01,333 --> 00:09:05,711 No, you don't. We're not supposed to reveal the future. 126 00:09:06,963 --> 00:09:09,006 Wait. I'm sorry. Time out. Can I... 127 00:09:09,090 --> 00:09:10,716 Can I ask you a question, by the way? Are you... 128 00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:12,968 Did you cut your hair or something? You look fabulous. 129 00:09:13,053 --> 00:09:16,639 I mean, you look like a Fate worse than death. 130 00:09:18,141 --> 00:09:21,769 - Gross! - It's blinkin'! 131 00:09:23,647 --> 00:09:26,232 Ladies, please. 132 00:09:26,316 --> 00:09:29,818 My fate is in your lovely hands. 133 00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:32,488 - Yeah! - All right. 134 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:39,787 In 18 years precisely, 135 00:09:39,871 --> 00:09:45,876 the planets will align ever so nicely. 136 00:09:45,961 --> 00:09:47,127 Verse. 137 00:09:47,212 --> 00:09:49,838 The time to act will be at hand. 138 00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:54,260 Unleash the Titans, your monstrous band. 139 00:09:54,344 --> 00:09:55,719 Good, good. 140 00:09:55,804 --> 00:10:01,100 Then the once-proud Zeus will finally fall, 141 00:10:01,184 --> 00:10:07,439 and you, Hades, will rule all! 142 00:10:07,524 --> 00:10:10,192 Yes! Hades rules! 143 00:10:10,277 --> 00:10:13,237 A word of caution to this tale. 144 00:10:13,321 --> 00:10:14,488 Excuse me? 145 00:10:14,572 --> 00:10:19,159 Should Hercules fight, you will fail. 146 00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:26,125 What? 147 00:10:26,209 --> 00:10:29,169 Okay, fine, fine. I'm cool. I'm fine. 148 00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:34,466 Pain? Panic? Got a little riddle for ya. 149 00:10:34,551 --> 00:10:37,720 How do you kill a god? 150 00:10:37,804 --> 00:10:41,265 - I do not know! - You can't. They're immortal? 151 00:10:41,349 --> 00:10:43,600 Bingo! They're immortal. 152 00:10:43,685 --> 00:10:48,897 So, first you got to turn the little sunspot mortal. 153 00:11:18,178 --> 00:11:20,346 What? What is it? 154 00:11:20,930 --> 00:11:22,264 - The baby! - The baby! 155 00:11:28,104 --> 00:11:30,230 Hercules! 156 00:11:34,986 --> 00:11:36,586 No! 157 00:11:40,784 --> 00:11:42,534 Now we did it! 158 00:11:42,619 --> 00:11:44,703 Zeus is gonna use us for target practice! 159 00:11:44,788 --> 00:11:46,705 Just hang onto the kid, Panic. 160 00:11:50,502 --> 00:11:51,502 Hurry! 161 00:11:51,586 --> 00:11:54,004 Let's just kill the kid and get it over with, okay? 162 00:11:54,089 --> 00:11:58,258 Here you go, kid. A little Grecian formula. 163 00:11:58,927 --> 00:12:02,721 Look at that! He's changing. Can we do it now? 164 00:12:02,806 --> 00:12:07,976 No, he has to drink the whole potion. Every last drop. 165 00:12:08,061 --> 00:12:09,269 Who's there? 166 00:12:14,734 --> 00:12:16,985 Alcmene, over here. 167 00:12:18,238 --> 00:12:21,281 You poor thing. 168 00:12:21,366 --> 00:12:23,617 - Don't cry. - Is anybody there? 169 00:12:23,701 --> 00:12:25,452 - Now? - Now. 170 00:12:28,039 --> 00:12:30,082 Well, he must have been abandoned. 171 00:12:30,166 --> 00:12:33,001 Amphitryon, for so many years 172 00:12:33,086 --> 00:12:36,171 we've prayed to the gods to bless us with a child. 173 00:12:36,256 --> 00:12:40,300 - Perhaps they've answered our prayers. - Perhaps they have. 174 00:12:40,385 --> 00:12:42,052 "Hercules"? 175 00:13:01,531 --> 00:13:04,032 Help, help, help! 176 00:13:04,117 --> 00:13:06,785 Hades is gonna kill us when he finds out what happened. 177 00:13:06,870 --> 00:13:09,288 You mean, if he finds out. 178 00:13:09,372 --> 00:13:11,623 Of course he's gonna... 179 00:13:11,708 --> 00:13:14,001 If. If is good. 180 00:13:15,712 --> 00:13:17,504 It was tragic. 181 00:13:17,589 --> 00:13:20,632 Zeus led all the gods on a frantic search. 182 00:13:20,717 --> 00:13:24,595 But by the time they found the baby, it was too late. 183 00:13:24,679 --> 00:13:29,266 Young Herc was mortal now 184 00:13:29,517 --> 00:13:33,270 But since he did not drink the last drop 185 00:13:33,396 --> 00:13:36,356 He still retained his godlike strength 186 00:13:36,441 --> 00:13:39,485 So thank his lucky stars 187 00:13:39,569 --> 00:13:40,736 Tell it, girl. 188 00:13:41,070 --> 00:13:44,656 But Zeus and Hera wept 189 00:13:46,075 --> 00:13:49,828 Because their son could never come home 190 00:13:49,913 --> 00:13:56,877 They'd have to watch their precious baby grow up from afar 191 00:13:56,961 --> 00:14:01,924 Though Hades' horrid plan 192 00:14:02,008 --> 00:14:05,594 Was hatched before Herc cut his first tooth 193 00:14:05,678 --> 00:14:09,473 The boy grew stronger every day 194 00:14:09,599 --> 00:14:13,852 And that's the gospel truth 195 00:14:13,937 --> 00:14:20,609 The gospel truth 196 00:14:31,371 --> 00:14:33,622 Hercules, slow down! 197 00:14:36,960 --> 00:14:37,960 Look out! 198 00:14:40,046 --> 00:14:41,463 Sorry, guys. 199 00:14:41,548 --> 00:14:43,882 - Hey, watch where you're goin'. - Sunday driver! 200 00:14:48,096 --> 00:14:49,930 Thanks, son. 201 00:14:50,014 --> 00:14:53,767 When old Penelope twisted her ankle back there, I thought we were done for. 202 00:14:53,851 --> 00:14:55,185 No problem, Pop. 203 00:14:55,270 --> 00:14:59,064 Don't unload just yet. First, I have to finagle with Phideas. 204 00:14:59,148 --> 00:15:00,524 Okay. 205 00:15:02,777 --> 00:15:03,902 Sorry, Penelope. 206 00:15:03,987 --> 00:15:07,239 Now, Hercules, this time, please just... 207 00:15:07,323 --> 00:15:09,616 I know. I know. 208 00:15:09,701 --> 00:15:11,577 Stay by the cart. 209 00:15:12,245 --> 00:15:14,204 That's my boy. 210 00:15:17,834 --> 00:15:19,793 Oh, my goodness. 211 00:15:19,877 --> 00:15:21,628 Careful! 212 00:15:22,755 --> 00:15:25,173 - Why, thank you. - No problem. 213 00:15:25,258 --> 00:15:27,551 Why, Hercules! 214 00:15:27,635 --> 00:15:28,719 It's you! 215 00:15:28,803 --> 00:15:31,930 - Let me help you with that. - No, no, no, no, no. I got it! 216 00:15:32,015 --> 00:15:34,683 I'm fine. You just run along. 217 00:15:34,767 --> 00:15:36,351 - Are you sure? - Yes. 218 00:15:36,436 --> 00:15:38,020 Absolutely. 219 00:15:42,233 --> 00:15:44,526 Yo! Give it here! 220 00:15:44,611 --> 00:15:46,612 Hey, you need an extra guy? 221 00:15:49,198 --> 00:15:50,824 Sorry, Herc. 222 00:15:50,992 --> 00:15:54,661 We already got five, and we want to keep it an even number. 223 00:15:54,746 --> 00:15:56,538 Hey, wait a second. Five isn't an even... 224 00:15:56,623 --> 00:15:58,498 - See ya, Herc. - What a geek! 225 00:15:58,583 --> 00:16:02,669 - Destructo Boy. - Maybe we should call him "Jerkules." 226 00:16:09,510 --> 00:16:11,136 Heads up! 227 00:16:11,220 --> 00:16:12,387 I got it! 228 00:16:12,472 --> 00:16:13,930 No! Stop! 229 00:16:18,478 --> 00:16:19,728 No. 230 00:16:20,855 --> 00:16:22,731 It's okay. 231 00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:30,989 Hey! 232 00:16:36,663 --> 00:16:40,165 - Son! - Hang on, Pop! Be right back! 233 00:16:40,249 --> 00:16:42,793 Oh, my! No! Don't! No, no, no, no! 234 00:16:42,877 --> 00:16:45,253 No, no, no, no, no, no! 235 00:16:51,219 --> 00:16:53,178 Watch out! 236 00:17:08,277 --> 00:17:10,779 Nice catch, Jerkules. 237 00:17:11,614 --> 00:17:13,365 Son... 238 00:17:14,617 --> 00:17:19,204 This is the last straw, Amphitryon! 239 00:17:19,789 --> 00:17:21,415 That boy is a menace! 240 00:17:21,499 --> 00:17:24,292 He's too dangerous to be around normal people! 241 00:17:26,129 --> 00:17:28,338 He didn't mean any harm. He's just a kid. 242 00:17:28,423 --> 00:17:32,259 He just can't control his strength. 243 00:17:32,343 --> 00:17:34,219 I'm warning you. 244 00:17:34,303 --> 00:17:38,473 You keep that freak away from here! 245 00:17:38,558 --> 00:17:41,184 Freak! Yeah, go away! 246 00:17:54,407 --> 00:17:58,702 Son, you shouldn't let those things they said back there get to you. 247 00:17:58,786 --> 00:18:03,915 But, Pop, they're right. I am a freak. I try to fit in. I really do. 248 00:18:04,417 --> 00:18:06,501 I just can't. 249 00:18:07,670 --> 00:18:13,425 Sometimes I feel like I really don't belong here, 250 00:18:14,510 --> 00:18:18,346 like I'm supposed to be someplace else. 251 00:18:19,265 --> 00:18:21,349 Hercules, son... 252 00:18:21,434 --> 00:18:23,393 I know it doesn't make any sense. 253 00:18:34,238 --> 00:18:39,451 I have often dreamed of a far off place 254 00:18:39,535 --> 00:18:44,956 Where a great, warm welcome will be waiting for me 255 00:18:45,041 --> 00:18:50,128 Where the crowds will cheer when they see my face 256 00:18:50,213 --> 00:18:56,009 And a voice keeps sayin' this is where I'm meant to be 257 00:18:56,719 --> 00:18:59,596 I will find my way 258 00:18:59,680 --> 00:19:02,057 I can go the distance 259 00:19:02,141 --> 00:19:04,893 I'll be there someday 260 00:19:04,977 --> 00:19:07,270 If I can be strong 261 00:19:07,355 --> 00:19:09,815 I know every mile 262 00:19:09,982 --> 00:19:13,068 Will be worth my while 263 00:19:14,028 --> 00:19:20,575 I would go most anywhere to feel like I 264 00:19:21,077 --> 00:19:21,577 Belong 265 00:19:28,459 --> 00:19:30,168 Hercules, 266 00:19:30,253 --> 00:19:35,549 there's something your mother and I have been meaning to tell ya. 267 00:19:35,633 --> 00:19:39,594 But if you found me, then where did I come from? 268 00:19:39,679 --> 00:19:41,638 Why was I left here? 269 00:19:42,390 --> 00:19:47,102 This was around your neck when we found you. 270 00:19:48,521 --> 00:19:51,022 It's the symbol of the gods. 271 00:19:51,607 --> 00:19:55,026 This is it! Don't you see? Maybe they have the answers! 272 00:19:55,111 --> 00:19:56,945 I'll go to the temple of Zeus and... 273 00:19:59,657 --> 00:20:02,367 Ma, Pop, 274 00:20:03,035 --> 00:20:06,621 you're the greatest parents anyone could have, but... 275 00:20:07,915 --> 00:20:09,499 I gotta know. 276 00:20:28,269 --> 00:20:31,271 I am on my way 277 00:20:31,355 --> 00:20:33,398 I can go the distance 278 00:20:33,482 --> 00:20:36,192 I don't care how far 279 00:20:36,319 --> 00:20:38,612 Somehow, I'll be strong 280 00:20:38,696 --> 00:20:41,114 I know every mile 281 00:20:41,198 --> 00:20:44,743 Will be worth my while 282 00:20:44,827 --> 00:20:47,913 I would go most anywhere 283 00:20:47,997 --> 00:20:54,336 To find where I belong 284 00:21:13,022 --> 00:21:15,023 Mighty Zeus, 285 00:21:15,107 --> 00:21:19,319 please, hear me and answer my prayer. 286 00:21:19,403 --> 00:21:21,279 I need to know. 287 00:21:21,364 --> 00:21:22,781 Who am I? 288 00:21:22,865 --> 00:21:25,367 Where do I belong? 289 00:21:38,214 --> 00:21:40,131 My boy. 290 00:21:40,216 --> 00:21:42,384 My little Hercules. 291 00:21:45,763 --> 00:21:48,098 Hey, hey, hey. Hold on, kiddo! 292 00:21:48,182 --> 00:21:49,307 What's your hurry? 293 00:21:49,392 --> 00:21:53,353 After all these years, is this the kind of hello you give your father? 294 00:21:54,772 --> 00:21:55,939 Father? 295 00:21:56,023 --> 00:21:59,025 Didn't know you had a famous father, did you? 296 00:21:59,110 --> 00:22:01,736 Surprise! 297 00:22:02,154 --> 00:22:04,197 Look how you've grown. 298 00:22:04,281 --> 00:22:09,619 Why, you've got your mother's beautiful eyes and my strong chin. 299 00:22:10,621 --> 00:22:12,205 I don't understand. 300 00:22:12,289 --> 00:22:16,334 If you're my father, that would make me a... 301 00:22:16,419 --> 00:22:19,587 - A god. - A god. 302 00:22:19,672 --> 00:22:20,714 A god! 303 00:22:20,798 --> 00:22:22,382 Hey, you wanted answers, 304 00:22:22,466 --> 00:22:25,969 and by thunder, you're old enough now to know the truth. 305 00:22:26,053 --> 00:22:29,639 But why did you leave me on Earth? Didn't you want me? 306 00:22:29,765 --> 00:22:31,307 Of course we did. 307 00:22:31,392 --> 00:22:34,352 Your mother and I loved you with all our hearts. 308 00:22:34,437 --> 00:22:38,106 Someone stole you from us and turned you mortal, 309 00:22:38,190 --> 00:22:41,192 and only gods can live on Mount Olympus. 310 00:22:41,694 --> 00:22:43,194 And you can't do a thing? 311 00:22:43,279 --> 00:22:45,321 I can't, Hercules, but you can. 312 00:22:45,406 --> 00:22:48,491 Really? What? I'll do anything. 313 00:22:48,576 --> 00:22:51,870 Hercules, if you can prove yourself a true hero on Earth, 314 00:22:51,954 --> 00:22:53,955 your godhood will be restored! 315 00:22:54,040 --> 00:22:56,458 A true hero. Great! 316 00:22:57,084 --> 00:23:00,587 Exactly how do you become a true hero? 317 00:23:00,671 --> 00:23:05,175 First, you must seek out Philoctetes, the trainer of heroes. 318 00:23:05,259 --> 00:23:08,053 Seek out Philoctetes. Right. I'll... 319 00:23:08,137 --> 00:23:10,346 Hold your horses! 320 00:23:10,431 --> 00:23:12,307 Which reminds me. 321 00:23:19,398 --> 00:23:24,486 You probably don't remember Pegasus, but you two go way back, son. 322 00:23:32,244 --> 00:23:34,120 Pegasus! 323 00:23:34,497 --> 00:23:39,584 He's a magnificent horse with the brain of a bird. 324 00:23:41,295 --> 00:23:44,422 I'll find Philoctetes and become a true hero. 325 00:23:44,507 --> 00:23:45,840 That's the spirit! 326 00:23:45,925 --> 00:23:47,467 I won't let you down, Father! 327 00:23:50,554 --> 00:23:52,472 Good luck, son. 328 00:23:55,184 --> 00:23:57,894 I will beat the odds 329 00:23:57,978 --> 00:23:59,771 I can go the distance 330 00:23:59,855 --> 00:24:02,357 I will face the world 331 00:24:02,441 --> 00:24:04,442 Fearless, proud and strong 332 00:24:04,527 --> 00:24:06,903 I will please the gods 333 00:24:06,987 --> 00:24:08,822 I can go the distance 334 00:24:08,906 --> 00:24:14,911 Till I find my hero's welcome right where I 335 00:24:15,037 --> 00:24:16,637 Belong 336 00:24:53,909 --> 00:24:55,535 You sure this is the right place? 337 00:25:06,922 --> 00:25:10,258 What's the matter, little guy? You stuck? 338 00:25:10,342 --> 00:25:11,926 Hey, butt out, buddy! 339 00:25:13,596 --> 00:25:16,431 Girls! Stop! Stop! Come back, come back, come back. 340 00:25:22,021 --> 00:25:25,982 - They can't keep their hands off me. - Hey! 341 00:25:30,154 --> 00:25:32,947 What's the matter? You never seen a satyr before? 342 00:25:33,032 --> 00:25:35,033 No. Can you help us? 343 00:25:35,117 --> 00:25:38,786 We're looking for someone called Philoctetes. 344 00:25:39,830 --> 00:25:41,164 Call me Phil. 345 00:25:41,248 --> 00:25:42,624 Phil! 346 00:25:42,708 --> 00:25:45,376 Boy, am I glad to meet you! I'm Hercules. 347 00:25:46,045 --> 00:25:47,962 This is Pegasus. 348 00:25:49,340 --> 00:25:51,507 Animals! Disgusting! 349 00:25:52,009 --> 00:25:53,218 I need your help. 350 00:25:53,302 --> 00:25:55,386 I want to become a hero, a true hero. 351 00:25:57,389 --> 00:26:00,266 - Sorry, kid. Can't help ya. - Wait! 352 00:26:01,268 --> 00:26:02,352 Sorry. 353 00:26:02,436 --> 00:26:07,065 - Why not? - Two words, I am retired. 354 00:26:08,192 --> 00:26:10,068 Look, I gotta do this. 355 00:26:10,152 --> 00:26:11,861 Haven't you ever had a dream, 356 00:26:11,946 --> 00:26:14,656 something you wanted so bad you'd do anything? 357 00:26:17,493 --> 00:26:20,828 Kid, come inside. I want to show you something. 358 00:26:29,088 --> 00:26:32,215 Watch it! That was part of the mast of the Argo. 359 00:26:32,299 --> 00:26:34,050 - The Argo? - Yeah. 360 00:26:34,134 --> 00:26:36,344 Who do you think taught Jason how to sail? 361 00:26:36,428 --> 00:26:37,720 Cleopatra? 362 00:26:37,805 --> 00:26:40,265 I trained all those would-be heroes. 363 00:26:40,391 --> 00:26:45,186 Odysseus, Perseus, Theseus. A lot of "yeuseus." 364 00:26:45,271 --> 00:26:49,607 And every single one of those bums let me down flatter than a discus. 365 00:26:49,692 --> 00:26:52,193 None of 'em could go the distance. 366 00:26:52,903 --> 00:26:55,697 And then there was Achilles. 367 00:26:55,864 --> 00:26:59,909 Now, there was a guy who had it all, the build, the foot speed. 368 00:26:59,994 --> 00:27:04,414 He could jab, he could take a hit, he could keep on comin'. 369 00:27:04,498 --> 00:27:07,166 But that furshlugginer heel of his! 370 00:27:07,251 --> 00:27:10,169 He barely gets nicked there once and kaboom! 371 00:27:10,671 --> 00:27:12,213 He's history. 372 00:27:14,216 --> 00:27:16,009 Yeah, I had a dream once. 373 00:27:16,093 --> 00:27:19,595 I dreamed I was gonna train the greatest hero there ever was. 374 00:27:19,680 --> 00:27:25,977 So great, the gods would hang a picture of him in the stars all across the sky, 375 00:27:26,061 --> 00:27:29,314 and people would say, "That's Phil's boy." 376 00:27:29,398 --> 00:27:31,316 That's right. 377 00:27:31,400 --> 00:27:33,192 But dreams are for rookies. 378 00:27:33,277 --> 00:27:35,445 A guy can only take so much disappointment. 379 00:27:35,529 --> 00:27:37,822 But I'm different than those other guys, Phil! 380 00:27:37,906 --> 00:27:41,242 I can go the distance. Come on. I'll show you. 381 00:27:42,244 --> 00:27:43,995 Geez! You don't give up, do ya? 382 00:27:44,079 --> 00:27:45,413 Watch this. 383 00:27:49,877 --> 00:27:51,836 Holy Hera. 384 00:27:51,920 --> 00:27:55,340 You know, maybe if I... No! Snap out of it! 385 00:27:55,424 --> 00:27:57,550 I'm too old to get mixed up in this stuff again. 386 00:27:57,634 --> 00:28:01,971 But if I don't become a true hero, I'll never be able to rejoin my father, Zeus. 387 00:28:02,431 --> 00:28:03,473 Hold it! 388 00:28:03,557 --> 00:28:06,601 Zeus is your father, right? 389 00:28:07,519 --> 00:28:11,105 Zeus. The big guy. He's your daddy. 390 00:28:11,190 --> 00:28:12,982 Mr Lightning Bolts! 391 00:28:13,067 --> 00:28:15,151 Read me a book, would ya, Da-da? 392 00:28:15,235 --> 00:28:18,279 Zeus! "Once upon a time..." 393 00:28:18,364 --> 00:28:19,530 It's the truth! 394 00:28:19,615 --> 00:28:21,157 Please! 395 00:28:23,619 --> 00:28:26,287 So you wanna be a hero, kid 396 00:28:26,372 --> 00:28:27,872 Well, whoop-de-do 397 00:28:28,791 --> 00:28:31,209 I have been around the block before 398 00:28:31,293 --> 00:28:33,711 With blockheads just like you 399 00:28:33,796 --> 00:28:36,047 Each and every one a disappointment 400 00:28:36,131 --> 00:28:39,717 Pain for which there ain't no ointment 401 00:28:39,802 --> 00:28:43,346 So much for excuses Though a kid of "Zeus" is 402 00:28:43,430 --> 00:28:46,682 Askin' me to jump into the fray 403 00:28:46,767 --> 00:28:49,685 My answer is two words 404 00:28:52,564 --> 00:28:54,107 Okay. 405 00:28:54,191 --> 00:28:56,359 - You mean you'll do it? - You win. 406 00:28:56,443 --> 00:28:58,736 - You won't be sorry, Phil. - Oh, gods. 407 00:28:58,821 --> 00:29:00,530 So when do we start? Can we start now? 408 00:29:02,866 --> 00:29:07,745 I'd given up hope that someone would come along 409 00:29:07,830 --> 00:29:12,792 A fella who'd ring the bell for once Not the gong 410 00:29:12,876 --> 00:29:15,169 The kind who wins trophies 411 00:29:15,254 --> 00:29:17,171 Won't settle for low fees 412 00:29:17,256 --> 00:29:19,549 At least semipro fees 413 00:29:19,633 --> 00:29:22,552 But, no, I get the greenhorn 414 00:29:22,636 --> 00:29:27,098 I've been out to pasture, pal My ambition gone 415 00:29:27,182 --> 00:29:31,894 Content to spend lazy days and to graze my lawn 416 00:29:31,979 --> 00:29:34,397 But you need an advisor 417 00:29:34,481 --> 00:29:36,774 A satyr, but wiser 418 00:29:36,859 --> 00:29:39,527 A good merchandiser and... 419 00:29:40,070 --> 00:29:41,779 There goes my ulcer 420 00:29:41,864 --> 00:29:46,534 I'm down to one last hope and I hope it's you 421 00:29:46,618 --> 00:29:51,164 Though, kid, you're not exactly a dream come true 422 00:29:51,457 --> 00:29:55,960 I trained enough turkeys Who never came through 423 00:29:56,044 --> 00:29:59,547 You're my one last hope So you'll have to do 424 00:29:59,882 --> 00:30:01,299 Rule number six. 425 00:30:01,383 --> 00:30:05,761 When rescuing a damsel, always handle with care. 426 00:30:07,764 --> 00:30:09,474 No! 427 00:30:10,851 --> 00:30:13,728 Rule number 95, kid. Concentrate! 428 00:30:15,814 --> 00:30:17,648 Rule number 96. 429 00:30:18,066 --> 00:30:19,484 Aim! 430 00:30:20,402 --> 00:30:25,156 Demigods have faced the odds And ended up a mockery 431 00:30:25,240 --> 00:30:30,077 Don't believe the stories That you read on all the crockery 432 00:30:30,162 --> 00:30:34,832 To be a true hero, kid, is a dying art 433 00:30:34,917 --> 00:30:37,251 Like paintin' a masterpiece 434 00:30:37,336 --> 00:30:39,670 It's a work of heart 435 00:30:39,755 --> 00:30:42,089 It takes more than sinew 436 00:30:42,174 --> 00:30:44,509 Comes down to what's in you 437 00:30:44,593 --> 00:30:48,221 You have to continue to grow 438 00:30:48,305 --> 00:30:50,598 Now, that's more like it! 439 00:30:50,682 --> 00:30:56,145 I'm down to one last shot And my last high note 440 00:30:56,980 --> 00:31:01,943 Before that blasted underworld gets my goat 441 00:31:02,027 --> 00:31:04,195 My dreams are on you, kid 442 00:31:04,279 --> 00:31:06,489 Go make 'em come true 443 00:31:06,573 --> 00:31:08,533 Climb that uphill slope 444 00:31:08,617 --> 00:31:10,993 Keep pushin' that envelope 445 00:31:11,078 --> 00:31:12,787 You're my one last hope 446 00:31:12,871 --> 00:31:18,626 And, kid, it's up to you 447 00:31:20,337 --> 00:31:21,837 Yeah! 448 00:31:24,091 --> 00:31:26,342 Did you see that? 449 00:31:26,426 --> 00:31:29,136 Next stop, Olympus. 450 00:31:29,805 --> 00:31:31,847 All right, just take it easy, champ. 451 00:31:31,932 --> 00:31:34,183 I am ready. I want to get off this island. 452 00:31:34,268 --> 00:31:36,686 I want to see battles and monsters. 453 00:31:36,770 --> 00:31:38,604 Rescue some damsels. 454 00:31:38,689 --> 00:31:40,773 You know, heroic stuff. 455 00:31:41,233 --> 00:31:44,402 - Well... - Come on! Phil! 456 00:31:44,486 --> 00:31:47,905 Well, okay. Okay, you want a road test? Saddle up, kid. 457 00:31:47,990 --> 00:31:50,324 We're going to Thebes! 458 00:31:51,451 --> 00:31:54,245 - So what's in Thebes? - A lot of problems. 459 00:31:54,329 --> 00:31:57,873 It's a big, tough town. Good place to start buildin' a rep. 460 00:31:59,960 --> 00:32:04,255 Sounds like your basic DID, Damsel in Distress. 461 00:32:11,179 --> 00:32:13,681 Not so fast, sweetheart. 462 00:32:13,765 --> 00:32:16,267 I swear, Nessus. Put me down or I'll... 463 00:32:17,352 --> 00:32:19,312 I like 'em fiery! 464 00:32:19,396 --> 00:32:21,147 Now, remember, kid. 465 00:32:21,231 --> 00:32:23,149 First, analyse the situation. 466 00:32:23,233 --> 00:32:25,484 Don't just barrel in there without thinking. 467 00:32:28,280 --> 00:32:29,989 He's losin' points for this! 468 00:32:30,073 --> 00:32:32,033 - You don't know what you're... - Halt! 469 00:32:35,037 --> 00:32:37,830 Step aside, two legs. 470 00:32:37,914 --> 00:32:41,751 Pardon me, my good sir. 471 00:32:41,835 --> 00:32:43,586 I'll have to ask you to release that young... 472 00:32:43,670 --> 00:32:46,631 - Keep movin', junior. - Lady. 473 00:32:46,715 --> 00:32:50,217 But you... Aren't you a damsel in distress? 474 00:32:50,302 --> 00:32:53,387 I'm a damsel, I'm in distress. 475 00:32:53,472 --> 00:32:56,474 I can handle this. Have a nice day. 476 00:32:58,393 --> 00:33:01,145 Ma'am, I'm afraid you may be too close to the situation to realise... 477 00:33:04,858 --> 00:33:08,152 - What are you doin'? Get your sword! - Sword. Right, right. 478 00:33:08,236 --> 00:33:11,405 Rule number 15, a hero is only as good as his weapon! 479 00:33:20,499 --> 00:33:22,708 Hold it! Hold on! He's gotta do it on his own. 480 00:33:22,793 --> 00:33:25,836 Come on, kid! Concentrate! 481 00:33:25,921 --> 00:33:27,588 Use your head! 482 00:33:35,263 --> 00:33:38,057 All right! Not bad, kid! 483 00:33:38,141 --> 00:33:41,227 Not exactly what I had in mind, but not bad. 484 00:33:44,147 --> 00:33:47,900 Miss, I'm really sorry. That was dumb. 485 00:33:48,402 --> 00:33:50,027 Yeah. 486 00:33:51,238 --> 00:33:52,613 Excuse me. 487 00:33:57,744 --> 00:34:01,372 Nice work! Excelente! 488 00:34:01,456 --> 00:34:03,541 Is Wonderboy here for real? 489 00:34:03,625 --> 00:34:06,711 What are you talkin' about? Of course he's real. 490 00:34:08,588 --> 00:34:13,300 And by the way, sweet cheeks, I'm real, too. 491 00:34:52,549 --> 00:34:54,633 - How was that, Phil? - Rein it in, rookie. 492 00:34:54,718 --> 00:34:57,553 You can get away with mistakes like those in the minor decathlons, 493 00:34:57,637 --> 00:35:00,264 but this is the big leagues! 494 00:35:00,348 --> 00:35:02,266 At least I beat him, didn't I? 495 00:35:02,350 --> 00:35:06,145 Next time, don't let your guard down because of a pair of big goo-goo eyes! 496 00:35:06,772 --> 00:35:11,484 It's like I keep tellin' ya. You gotta stay focused, and... You... 497 00:35:20,994 --> 00:35:24,121 Are you all right, Miss... 498 00:35:24,206 --> 00:35:28,083 Megara. My friends call me Meg. At least, they would if I had any friends. 499 00:35:28,168 --> 00:35:32,880 So did they give you a name along with all those rippling pectorals? 500 00:35:34,216 --> 00:35:36,008 I'm... 501 00:35:37,886 --> 00:35:39,512 Are you always this articulate? 502 00:35:39,596 --> 00:35:42,640 Hercules. My... My name is Hercules. 503 00:35:43,183 --> 00:35:46,185 Hercules. I think I prefer Wonderboy. 504 00:35:47,020 --> 00:35:51,273 So, how'd you get mixed up with the... 505 00:35:51,358 --> 00:35:53,818 Pinhead with hooves? Well, you know how men are. 506 00:35:53,902 --> 00:35:57,655 They think that "No" means "Yes," and "Get lost" means "Take me, I'm yours." 507 00:36:00,158 --> 00:36:03,118 Don't worry. Shorty here can explain it to ya later. 508 00:36:03,912 --> 00:36:08,749 Well, thanks for everything, Herc. It's been a real slice. 509 00:36:09,251 --> 00:36:12,628 Wait! Can we give you a ride? 510 00:36:16,424 --> 00:36:19,301 I don't think your pinto likes me very much. 511 00:36:19,386 --> 00:36:24,348 Pegasus? No. Don't be silly. He'd be more than happy to... 512 00:36:26,434 --> 00:36:32,231 I'll be all right. I'm a big, tough girl. I tie my own sandals and everything. 513 00:36:33,817 --> 00:36:35,860 Bye-bye, Wonderboy. 514 00:36:36,278 --> 00:36:37,778 Bye. 515 00:36:38,905 --> 00:36:42,324 She's something. Isn't she, Phil? 516 00:36:42,409 --> 00:36:45,119 Yeah. Yeah. She's really something. 517 00:36:45,203 --> 00:36:46,662 A real pain in the patella! 518 00:36:46,746 --> 00:36:49,957 Earth to Herc! Come in, Herc! Come in, Herc! 519 00:36:50,041 --> 00:36:52,877 We got a job to do, remember? 520 00:36:52,961 --> 00:36:54,712 Thebes is still waitin'. 521 00:36:54,796 --> 00:36:57,673 Yeah. Yeah. I know. 522 00:37:08,476 --> 00:37:10,603 How cute. 523 00:37:10,687 --> 00:37:13,314 A couple of rodents looking for a theme park. 524 00:37:13,398 --> 00:37:16,859 Who you callin' a rodent, sister? I'm a bunny! 525 00:37:16,943 --> 00:37:18,360 And I'm his gopher. 526 00:37:20,196 --> 00:37:22,031 I thought I smelled a rat. 527 00:37:22,115 --> 00:37:23,824 Meg? 528 00:37:23,909 --> 00:37:25,743 Speak of the devil. 529 00:37:25,827 --> 00:37:29,914 Meg, my little flower, my little bird, my little nut, Meg. 530 00:37:29,998 --> 00:37:31,957 What exactly happened here? 531 00:37:32,042 --> 00:37:34,043 I thought you were gonna persuade the river guardian 532 00:37:34,127 --> 00:37:35,711 to join my team for the uprising, 533 00:37:35,795 --> 00:37:38,589 and here I am, kind of river guardian-less. 534 00:37:38,673 --> 00:37:42,718 I gave it my best shot, but he made me an offer I had to refuse. 535 00:37:42,802 --> 00:37:45,429 Fine. So, instead of subtracting two years from your sentence, 536 00:37:45,513 --> 00:37:47,264 hey, I'm gonna add two on, okay? 537 00:37:47,349 --> 00:37:48,432 Give that your best shot. 538 00:37:48,516 --> 00:37:51,560 It wasn't my fault. It was this wonderboy, Hercules. 539 00:37:52,395 --> 00:37:56,190 Hercules? Why does that name ring a bell? 540 00:37:56,274 --> 00:37:59,109 I don't know. Maybe we owe him money? 541 00:37:59,194 --> 00:38:03,781 - What was that name again? - Hercules. 542 00:38:03,865 --> 00:38:05,950 He comes on with this big, innocent farm boy routine, 543 00:38:06,034 --> 00:38:07,743 but I could see through that in a Peloponnesian minute. 544 00:38:07,827 --> 00:38:08,786 Wait a minute. 545 00:38:08,870 --> 00:38:12,081 Wasn't Hercules the name of that kid we were supposed to... 546 00:38:12,165 --> 00:38:14,208 - Oh, my gods! - Oh, my gods! 547 00:38:14,292 --> 00:38:15,668 Run for it! 548 00:38:15,752 --> 00:38:18,963 So you took care of him, huh? 549 00:38:19,047 --> 00:38:21,048 Dead as a door nail. 550 00:38:21,132 --> 00:38:23,968 Weren't those your exact words? 551 00:38:24,052 --> 00:38:25,928 This might be a different Hercules. 552 00:38:26,012 --> 00:38:29,682 Yeah! I mean, Hercules is a very popular name nowadays! 553 00:38:29,766 --> 00:38:33,143 Remember, like, a few years ago, every other boy was named Jason, 554 00:38:33,228 --> 00:38:34,937 and the girls were all named Brittany? 555 00:38:35,021 --> 00:38:39,566 I'm about to rearrange the cosmos, 556 00:38:39,651 --> 00:38:46,615 and the one schlemiel who can louse it up is waltzing around in the woods! 557 00:38:50,745 --> 00:38:52,663 Wait. Wait, big guy. 558 00:38:52,747 --> 00:38:55,124 - We can still cut in on his waltzing. - That's right! 559 00:38:55,208 --> 00:38:58,377 And at least we made him mortal. That's a good thing. 560 00:38:58,461 --> 00:39:00,087 Didn't we? 561 00:39:02,048 --> 00:39:03,590 Fortunately for the three of you, 562 00:39:03,675 --> 00:39:07,511 we still have time to correct this rather egregious oversight. 563 00:39:07,595 --> 00:39:11,056 And this time, no foul-ups. 564 00:39:16,896 --> 00:39:20,357 - Is that all one town? - One town, a million troubles. 565 00:39:20,442 --> 00:39:24,695 The one and only Thebes. The Big Olive itself. 566 00:39:24,779 --> 00:39:27,990 If you can make it there, you can make it anywhere. 567 00:39:35,040 --> 00:39:39,376 Stick with me, kid. This city is a dangerous place. 568 00:39:39,461 --> 00:39:43,464 - Look where you're goin', numbskull! - Hey, I'm walkin' here! 569 00:39:43,548 --> 00:39:46,133 You see what I mean? I'm tellin' you, wackos. 570 00:39:46,217 --> 00:39:49,553 Pitta bread. Pitta bread. Get your pitta bread here. 571 00:39:49,637 --> 00:39:51,221 Hey, Mack. 572 00:39:52,640 --> 00:39:55,642 - You wanna buy a sundial? - He's not interested, all right? 573 00:39:55,727 --> 00:39:56,769 Come on, kid. 574 00:39:56,853 --> 00:39:59,980 The end is coming! Can't you feel it? 575 00:40:00,065 --> 00:40:04,318 Yes, yes. Thank you for the info. Yes. We'll ponder that for a while. 576 00:40:04,402 --> 00:40:05,694 Just stare at the sidewalk. Come on. 577 00:40:05,779 --> 00:40:08,238 Don't make eye contact. People here are nuts. 578 00:40:08,323 --> 00:40:10,491 That's because they live in a city of turmoil. 579 00:40:10,575 --> 00:40:11,617 Trust me, kid. 580 00:40:11,701 --> 00:40:13,994 You're gonna be just what the doctor ordered. 581 00:40:14,996 --> 00:40:19,291 It was tragic! We lost everything in the fire. 582 00:40:19,375 --> 00:40:22,669 Everything except old Snowball here. 583 00:40:23,463 --> 00:40:26,507 Now, were the fires before or after the earthquake? 584 00:40:26,591 --> 00:40:28,759 They were after the earthquake. I remember. 585 00:40:28,843 --> 00:40:30,260 But before the flood. 586 00:40:30,345 --> 00:40:33,764 Don't even get me started on the crime rate. 587 00:40:33,848 --> 00:40:37,434 Thebes has certainly gone downhill in a hurry. 588 00:40:37,519 --> 00:40:39,103 Tell me about it. 589 00:40:39,187 --> 00:40:41,230 It seems like every time I turn around, 590 00:40:41,314 --> 00:40:43,607 there's some new monster wreaking havoc and I... 591 00:40:43,691 --> 00:40:47,277 All we need now is a plague of locusts. 592 00:40:49,072 --> 00:40:52,282 That's it! I'm movin' to Sparta! 593 00:40:52,367 --> 00:40:53,617 Excuse me. 594 00:40:54,744 --> 00:41:00,374 It seems to me that what you folks need is a hero. 595 00:41:01,751 --> 00:41:03,669 Yeah, and who are you? 596 00:41:05,713 --> 00:41:10,384 I'm Hercules, and I happen to be a hero. 597 00:41:11,719 --> 00:41:14,096 - Is that so? - A hero! 598 00:41:14,180 --> 00:41:18,725 - Have you ever saved a town before? - No. Not exactly, but I... 599 00:41:18,810 --> 00:41:21,311 Have you ever reversed a natural disaster? 600 00:41:21,396 --> 00:41:23,814 Well, no. 601 00:41:23,898 --> 00:41:27,025 Listen to this. He's just another chariot chaser. 602 00:41:27,110 --> 00:41:29,278 - This we need. - That's a laugh. 603 00:41:29,362 --> 00:41:31,697 Don't you pea brains get it? 604 00:41:31,823 --> 00:41:34,074 This kid is the genuine article. 605 00:41:34,284 --> 00:41:38,162 Hey, isn't that the goat-man who trained Achilles? 606 00:41:38,246 --> 00:41:39,913 Watch it, pal. 607 00:41:39,998 --> 00:41:42,249 Yeah, you're right. 608 00:41:42,333 --> 00:41:44,835 Hey, nice job on those heels! 609 00:41:44,919 --> 00:41:47,504 Ya missed a spot! 610 00:41:47,589 --> 00:41:49,590 I got your heel right here! 611 00:41:49,674 --> 00:41:51,800 I'll wipe that stupid grin off your face! You... 612 00:41:51,885 --> 00:41:55,179 Hey, Phil! Phil! Phil! Take it easy. Phil. 613 00:41:55,263 --> 00:41:57,139 What are you, crazy? 614 00:41:57,932 --> 00:42:03,312 Young man, we need a professional hero, not an amateur. 615 00:42:04,731 --> 00:42:06,857 Well, wait. Stop! 616 00:42:12,155 --> 00:42:16,033 How am I supposed to prove myself a hero if nobody will give me a chance? 617 00:42:16,117 --> 00:42:17,242 You'll get your chance. 618 00:42:17,327 --> 00:42:20,996 You just need some kind of catastrophe or disaster. 619 00:42:21,080 --> 00:42:22,164 Please. 620 00:42:22,248 --> 00:42:25,459 Help! Please! There's been a terrible accident! 621 00:42:25,543 --> 00:42:27,711 - Meg? - Speakin' of disasters. 622 00:42:28,129 --> 00:42:31,423 Wonderboy! Hercules! Thank goodness! 623 00:42:31,507 --> 00:42:32,966 What's wrong? 624 00:42:33,051 --> 00:42:36,386 Outside of town, two little boys. They were playing in the gorge. 625 00:42:36,471 --> 00:42:39,139 There was this terrible rockslide. 626 00:42:39,224 --> 00:42:41,975 - They're trapped! - Kids? Trapped? 627 00:42:42,060 --> 00:42:43,644 Phil, this is great! 628 00:42:43,728 --> 00:42:45,520 You're really choked up about this, aren't ya? 629 00:42:45,605 --> 00:42:46,563 Come on! 630 00:42:46,648 --> 00:42:51,401 No, I... You don't... I have this terrible fear of heights! 631 00:42:56,241 --> 00:42:59,034 I'm right behind ya, kid! 632 00:42:59,118 --> 00:43:01,036 I'm way behind ya, kid. 633 00:43:01,621 --> 00:43:03,497 I got a fur wedgie. 634 00:43:10,421 --> 00:43:12,214 - Are you okay? - I'll be fine. 635 00:43:12,298 --> 00:43:14,508 Just get me down before I ruin the upholstery. 636 00:43:14,592 --> 00:43:17,636 - Help! I can't breathe! - Hurry! 637 00:43:17,720 --> 00:43:20,180 - Get us out! - We're suffocating! 638 00:43:21,307 --> 00:43:24,559 Somebody call IX-l-I! 639 00:43:24,644 --> 00:43:26,270 Easy, fellas. You'll be all right. 640 00:43:26,354 --> 00:43:30,857 - We can't last much longer! - Get us out before we get crushed! 641 00:43:49,711 --> 00:43:51,920 - How you boys doin'? - We're okay now. 642 00:43:52,005 --> 00:43:55,632 Jeepers, mister. You're really strong. 643 00:43:55,717 --> 00:43:59,219 Well, try to be a little more careful next time, okay, kids? 644 00:43:59,304 --> 00:44:00,971 We sure will. 645 00:44:06,436 --> 00:44:08,395 A stirring performance, boys. 646 00:44:08,479 --> 00:44:10,314 I was really moved. 647 00:44:11,607 --> 00:44:13,900 "Jeepers, mister"? 648 00:44:13,985 --> 00:44:17,195 I was going for innocence. 649 00:44:17,280 --> 00:44:21,491 And, hey, two thumbs way, way up for our leading lady. 650 00:44:21,576 --> 00:44:23,285 What a dish. What a doll. 651 00:44:23,369 --> 00:44:26,079 Get outta there, you big lug, while you still can. 652 00:44:26,622 --> 00:44:28,790 Phil, I did great. 653 00:44:28,916 --> 00:44:31,001 They even applauded, sort of. 654 00:44:33,129 --> 00:44:36,715 I hate to burst your bubble, kid, but that ain't applause. 655 00:44:44,182 --> 00:44:46,975 Phil? What do you call that thing? 656 00:44:47,060 --> 00:44:48,268 Two words. 657 00:44:49,645 --> 00:44:51,438 Am-scray! 658 00:44:54,317 --> 00:44:58,695 Let's get ready to rumble! 659 00:45:04,911 --> 00:45:07,537 That's it. Dance around! Dance around! 660 00:45:07,622 --> 00:45:10,749 Watch the teeth. Watch the teeth. Keep going. Come on. Come on. 661 00:45:10,833 --> 00:45:14,294 Lead with your left. Lead with your left! Your other left! 662 00:46:08,141 --> 00:46:11,601 All right! All right! You're bad! Okay! 663 00:46:11,686 --> 00:46:15,355 See, Phil? That... That wasn't so hard. 664 00:46:15,440 --> 00:46:17,149 Kid, kid, kid. 665 00:46:17,233 --> 00:46:18,733 How many horns do ya see? 666 00:46:18,818 --> 00:46:20,569 Six? 667 00:46:20,653 --> 00:46:23,530 Close enough. Let's get you cleaned up. 668 00:46:27,618 --> 00:46:30,620 Guys, guys, relax. 669 00:46:30,705 --> 00:46:32,581 It's only half-time. 670 00:46:35,710 --> 00:46:37,669 That doesn't sound good. 671 00:46:45,303 --> 00:46:46,928 Definitely not good! 672 00:47:15,750 --> 00:47:18,668 Will you forget the head-slicing thing? 673 00:47:26,260 --> 00:47:29,846 Phil, I don't think we covered this one in basic training! 674 00:47:41,108 --> 00:47:43,777 My favourite part of the game, 675 00:47:46,948 --> 00:47:48,782 sudden death. 676 00:48:11,722 --> 00:48:15,600 There goes another one. Just like Achilles. 677 00:48:18,187 --> 00:48:20,063 Game. 678 00:48:20,147 --> 00:48:21,982 Set. 679 00:48:22,066 --> 00:48:23,441 Match. 680 00:48:47,216 --> 00:48:52,304 Phil, you gotta admit. That was pretty heroic. 681 00:48:52,388 --> 00:48:56,933 Ya did it, kid! Ya did it! You won by a landslide! 682 00:48:59,562 --> 00:49:01,646 Hades mad. 683 00:49:04,358 --> 00:49:07,152 Well, what do ya know? 684 00:49:11,198 --> 00:49:15,160 From that day forward, our boy Hercules could do no wrong. 685 00:49:15,244 --> 00:49:18,663 He was so hot, steam looked cool. 686 00:49:18,748 --> 00:49:20,999 Oh, yeah 687 00:49:21,959 --> 00:49:24,919 Bless my soul Herc was on a roll 688 00:49:25,004 --> 00:49:27,964 Person of the week in every Greek opinion poll 689 00:49:28,049 --> 00:49:30,675 - What a pro - Herc could stop a show 690 00:49:30,760 --> 00:49:33,762 Point him at a monster and you're talkin' SRO 691 00:49:33,846 --> 00:49:36,640 - He was a no one - A zero, zero 692 00:49:36,724 --> 00:49:39,559 - Now he's a honcho - He's a hero 693 00:49:39,685 --> 00:49:42,479 Here was a kid with his act down pat 694 00:49:42,563 --> 00:49:45,440 Zero to hero in no time flat 695 00:49:45,524 --> 00:49:48,318 - Zero to hero - Just like that 696 00:49:48,402 --> 00:49:50,904 When he smiled the girls went wild 697 00:49:51,030 --> 00:49:53,823 With oohs and aahs 698 00:49:53,908 --> 00:49:56,660 And they slapped his face on every vase 699 00:49:56,744 --> 00:50:00,080 On every "vahse" 700 00:50:00,164 --> 00:50:02,582 From appearance fees and royalties 701 00:50:02,667 --> 00:50:05,251 Our Herc had cash to burn 702 00:50:05,336 --> 00:50:07,962 Now nouveau riche and famous 703 00:50:08,047 --> 00:50:11,633 He could tell you what's a Grecian urn 704 00:50:11,759 --> 00:50:14,469 Say amen, there he goes again 705 00:50:14,553 --> 00:50:17,430 - Sweet and undefeated - And an awesome 10-for-10 706 00:50:17,556 --> 00:50:20,100 Folks lined up just to watch him flex 707 00:50:20,184 --> 00:50:23,353 And this perfect package packed a pair of pretty pecs 708 00:50:23,437 --> 00:50:26,189 Hercie, he comes he sees, he conquers 709 00:50:26,273 --> 00:50:29,192 Honey, the crowds were goin' bonkers 710 00:50:29,276 --> 00:50:31,194 He showed the moxie brains and spunk 711 00:50:31,278 --> 00:50:32,278 Yeah 712 00:50:32,363 --> 00:50:34,823 - From zero to hero - A major hunk 713 00:50:34,907 --> 00:50:37,617 - Zero to hero - And who'd have thunk? 714 00:50:41,163 --> 00:50:43,456 Who put the glad in gladiator? 715 00:50:43,541 --> 00:50:44,916 Hercules 716 00:50:45,000 --> 00:50:47,377 Who's darin' deeds are great theatre? 717 00:50:47,461 --> 00:50:49,087 Hercules 718 00:50:49,171 --> 00:50:51,089 - Isn't he bold? - No one braver 719 00:50:51,173 --> 00:50:53,216 - Is he sweet? - Our favourite flavour 720 00:50:53,300 --> 00:50:54,342 Hercules 721 00:50:54,427 --> 00:50:55,427 My man. 722 00:50:55,511 --> 00:50:57,387 - Hercules - Hercules 723 00:50:57,471 --> 00:50:59,472 Hercules 724 00:50:59,557 --> 00:51:01,516 - Hercules - Look at my Hercules 725 00:51:01,600 --> 00:51:05,061 - Hercules, Hercules - Yeah, yeah, yeah 726 00:51:05,146 --> 00:51:07,480 Bless my soul, Herc was on a roll 727 00:51:07,565 --> 00:51:10,150 - Undefeated - Riding high 728 00:51:10,234 --> 00:51:11,609 And the nicest guy. 729 00:51:11,694 --> 00:51:13,403 Not conceited 730 00:51:13,487 --> 00:51:15,447 - He was a nothing - Zero, zero 731 00:51:15,531 --> 00:51:17,490 - Now he's a honcho - He's our hero 732 00:51:17,575 --> 00:51:20,702 He hit the heights at breakneck speed 733 00:51:20,786 --> 00:51:23,037 From zero to hero 734 00:51:23,122 --> 00:51:24,956 Herc is a hero 735 00:51:25,040 --> 00:51:29,419 Now he's a hero 736 00:51:30,337 --> 00:51:32,297 Yes, indeed 737 00:51:35,092 --> 00:51:36,468 Pull! 738 00:51:40,306 --> 00:51:42,307 Nice shootin', Rex. 739 00:51:42,391 --> 00:51:43,933 I can't believe this guy. 740 00:51:44,018 --> 00:51:47,604 I throw everything I've got at him and it doesn't even... 741 00:51:48,355 --> 00:51:51,858 What are those? 742 00:51:53,027 --> 00:51:56,070 I don't know. I thought they looked kinda dashing. 743 00:51:56,155 --> 00:51:59,908 I've got 24 hours to get rid of this bozo, 744 00:51:59,992 --> 00:52:05,622 or the entire scheme I've been setting up for 18 years goes up in smoke, 745 00:52:06,040 --> 00:52:11,377 and you are wearing his merchandise! 746 00:52:18,344 --> 00:52:19,427 Thirsty? 747 00:52:30,689 --> 00:52:32,065 Looks like your game's over. 748 00:52:32,149 --> 00:52:34,901 Wonderboy is hitting every curve you throw at him. 749 00:52:35,820 --> 00:52:37,695 Yeah. 750 00:52:39,615 --> 00:52:41,366 I wonder if maybe 751 00:52:41,450 --> 00:52:47,747 I haven't been throwing the right curves at him, Meg, my sweet. 752 00:52:48,207 --> 00:52:49,999 Don't even go there. 753 00:52:50,084 --> 00:52:54,629 See, he's gotta have a weakness because everybody's got a weakness. 754 00:52:54,713 --> 00:52:57,173 I mean, for what? Pandora, it was the box thing. 755 00:52:57,258 --> 00:52:59,926 For the Trojans, hey. They bet on the wrong horse, okay? 756 00:53:00,010 --> 00:53:02,887 We simply need to find out Wonderboy's. 757 00:53:02,972 --> 00:53:05,139 I've done my part. Get your little imps... 758 00:53:05,224 --> 00:53:06,391 They couldn't handle him as a baby. 759 00:53:06,475 --> 00:53:09,853 I need somebody who can handle him as a man. 760 00:53:09,937 --> 00:53:11,938 Hey, I've sworn off manhandling. 761 00:53:12,022 --> 00:53:16,025 That's good because that's what got you into this jam in the first place. 762 00:53:16,110 --> 00:53:19,529 You sold your soul to me to save your boyfriend's life. 763 00:53:19,613 --> 00:53:22,198 And how does this creep thank you? 764 00:53:22,283 --> 00:53:25,368 By running off with some babe. 765 00:53:25,452 --> 00:53:27,537 He hurt you real bad, didn't he, Meg? 766 00:53:27,621 --> 00:53:29,581 Look, I learned my lesson, okay? 767 00:53:29,665 --> 00:53:34,210 Which is exactly why I got a feelin' you're gonna leap at my new offer. 768 00:53:34,295 --> 00:53:37,338 You give me the key to bringing down Wonder Breath, 769 00:53:37,423 --> 00:53:43,428 and I give you the thing that you crave most in the entire cosmos, 770 00:53:43,888 --> 00:53:45,805 your freedom. 771 00:53:49,977 --> 00:53:51,561 You should have been there, Father. 772 00:53:51,645 --> 00:53:56,900 I mangled the Minotaur, grappled with the Gorgon. 773 00:53:56,984 --> 00:53:58,234 Just like Phil told me. 774 00:53:58,319 --> 00:54:02,155 I analysed the situation, controlled my strength and kicked. 775 00:54:04,241 --> 00:54:06,492 The crowds went wild! 776 00:54:08,829 --> 00:54:10,246 Thank you. Thank you. 777 00:54:11,624 --> 00:54:15,585 You're doin' great, son. You're doing your old man proud. 778 00:54:15,669 --> 00:54:17,879 I'm glad to hear you say that, Father. 779 00:54:17,963 --> 00:54:20,340 I've been waiting for this day a long time. 780 00:54:20,883 --> 00:54:22,592 What day is that, son? 781 00:54:22,676 --> 00:54:25,720 The day I rejoin the gods. 782 00:54:25,804 --> 00:54:29,724 You've done wonderfully. You really have, my boy. 783 00:54:29,808 --> 00:54:31,643 You're just not there yet. 784 00:54:31,727 --> 00:54:35,772 You haven't proven yourself a true hero. 785 00:54:35,856 --> 00:54:39,275 But, Father, I've beaten every single monster I've come up against. 786 00:54:39,360 --> 00:54:42,612 I'm the most famous person in all of Greece. 787 00:54:42,696 --> 00:54:46,574 I'm an action figure! 788 00:54:46,659 --> 00:54:52,288 I'm afraid being famous isn't the same as being a true hero. 789 00:54:52,373 --> 00:54:54,123 What more can I do? 790 00:54:54,208 --> 00:54:57,710 It's something you have to discover for yourself. 791 00:54:57,795 --> 00:55:02,048 - But how can I... - Look inside your heart. 792 00:55:03,300 --> 00:55:05,468 Father, wait! 793 00:55:21,318 --> 00:55:23,695 On your left is Hercules' villa. 794 00:55:23,779 --> 00:55:26,114 Our next stop is the Pecs and Flex Gift Shop 795 00:55:26,198 --> 00:55:27,198 where you can pick up 796 00:55:27,282 --> 00:55:31,244 the great hero's 30-minute workout scroll Buns of Bronze. 797 00:55:31,328 --> 00:55:33,663 At 1:00, you got a meeting with King Augeas. 798 00:55:33,747 --> 00:55:35,498 He's got a problem with his stables. 799 00:55:35,582 --> 00:55:37,333 I'd advise you not to wear your new sandals. 800 00:55:37,418 --> 00:55:39,752 - Phil? - I told you, don't move! 801 00:55:39,837 --> 00:55:41,462 DGR, the Daughters of the Greek Revolution. 802 00:55:41,588 --> 00:55:42,588 - Phil. - At 3:00, 803 00:55:42,673 --> 00:55:44,674 you gotta get a girdle from some Amazons. 804 00:55:44,758 --> 00:55:47,802 Phil, what's the point? 805 00:55:49,930 --> 00:55:51,222 That's it! 806 00:55:51,306 --> 00:55:53,266 Keep your toga on, pal. 807 00:55:56,854 --> 00:55:58,646 What d'you mean, "What's the point?" 808 00:55:58,731 --> 00:56:00,481 You wanna go to Olympus, don't ya? 809 00:56:00,566 --> 00:56:04,652 Yeah, but this stuff doesn't seem to be getting me anywhere. 810 00:56:04,737 --> 00:56:07,321 You can't give up now. I'm countin' on ya. 811 00:56:07,406 --> 00:56:09,699 I gave this everything I had. 812 00:56:11,994 --> 00:56:14,871 Listen to me, kid. I seen 'em all. 813 00:56:14,955 --> 00:56:19,167 And I am tellin' you, and this is the honest-to-Zeus truth, 814 00:56:19,251 --> 00:56:22,253 - you got somethin' I never seen before. - Really? 815 00:56:22,337 --> 00:56:26,007 I can feel it right down to these stubby bowlegs of mine. 816 00:56:26,091 --> 00:56:28,968 There is nothin' you can't do, kid. 817 00:56:30,637 --> 00:56:31,637 It's him! 818 00:56:32,306 --> 00:56:33,639 Hey, watch it! Watch it! Watch... 819 00:56:33,724 --> 00:56:37,477 - I touched his elbow! - I got his sweatband! 820 00:56:37,561 --> 00:56:39,812 Phil, help! 821 00:56:39,897 --> 00:56:42,398 - Okay. Escape plan, beta. - Gotcha. 822 00:56:43,442 --> 00:56:44,901 Hey. Where is he? 823 00:56:44,985 --> 00:56:47,320 There he goes! On the veranda! 824 00:57:03,879 --> 00:57:04,879 Let's see. 825 00:57:04,963 --> 00:57:07,423 What could be behind curtain number one? 826 00:57:07,508 --> 00:57:08,758 Meg! 827 00:57:08,842 --> 00:57:11,969 It's all right. The sea of raging hormones has ebbed. 828 00:57:12,054 --> 00:57:15,098 It's great to see you. 829 00:57:15,182 --> 00:57:16,808 I missed you. 830 00:57:16,892 --> 00:57:19,352 So this is what heroes do on their days off. 831 00:57:19,436 --> 00:57:21,687 I'm no hero. 832 00:57:21,772 --> 00:57:24,107 Sure ya are. Everybody in Greece 833 00:57:24,191 --> 00:57:26,692 thinks you're the greatest thing since they put the pocket in pitta. 834 00:57:27,569 --> 00:57:29,445 I know. It's crazy. 835 00:57:29,530 --> 00:57:31,280 You know, I can't go anywhere without being mobbed. 836 00:57:31,365 --> 00:57:33,616 - I mean... - You sound like you could use a break. 837 00:57:33,700 --> 00:57:36,828 Think your nanny goat would go berserk 838 00:57:36,912 --> 00:57:38,621 if you played hooky this afternoon? 839 00:57:38,705 --> 00:57:40,206 I don't know. 840 00:57:40,290 --> 00:57:41,958 Phil's got the rest of the day pretty much booked. 841 00:57:42,042 --> 00:57:45,002 Phil, schmill. Just follow me. 842 00:57:45,087 --> 00:57:49,382 Out the window, round the dumbbells, you lift up the back wall and we're gone. 843 00:57:54,763 --> 00:57:56,973 What a day. 844 00:57:57,057 --> 00:58:02,520 First, that restaurant by the bay, and then that play, that Oedipus thing. 845 00:58:02,604 --> 00:58:05,148 Man! I thought I had problems. 846 00:58:09,236 --> 00:58:12,780 - Stop foolin' around! - Yeah. Get the goods, sister. 847 00:58:12,865 --> 00:58:16,367 I didn't know that playing hooky could be so much fun. 848 00:58:16,451 --> 00:58:20,204 - Yeah. Neither did I. - Thanks, Meg. 849 00:58:22,583 --> 00:58:24,250 Don't thank me just yet. 850 00:58:26,044 --> 00:58:27,295 Careful. 851 00:58:27,379 --> 00:58:29,463 Sorry. Weak ankles. 852 00:58:29,548 --> 00:58:32,967 Yeah? Well, maybe you better sit down for a while. 853 00:58:34,261 --> 00:58:39,473 So, do you have any problems with things like this? 854 00:58:41,435 --> 00:58:43,144 Weak ankles, I mean. 855 00:58:43,937 --> 00:58:46,063 No. Not really. 856 00:58:46,148 --> 00:58:49,984 No weaknesses whatsoever? 857 00:58:50,068 --> 00:58:52,153 No trick knee? 858 00:58:52,821 --> 00:58:55,489 Ruptured disks? 859 00:58:57,659 --> 00:59:01,621 No. I'm afraid I'm fit as a fiddle. 860 00:59:02,748 --> 00:59:05,124 Wonderboy, you are perfect. 861 00:59:05,584 --> 00:59:07,960 Thanks. 862 00:59:12,216 --> 00:59:14,383 It looks better that way. 863 00:59:14,468 --> 00:59:16,802 No, it really does. 864 00:59:23,602 --> 00:59:25,895 You know, when I was a kid, 865 00:59:25,979 --> 00:59:30,066 I would have given anything to be exactly like everybody else. 866 00:59:30,150 --> 00:59:32,777 You wanted to be petty and dishonest? 867 00:59:32,861 --> 00:59:34,028 Everybody's not like that. 868 00:59:34,821 --> 00:59:36,739 Yes, they are. 869 00:59:36,823 --> 00:59:38,616 You're not like that. 870 00:59:38,700 --> 00:59:40,368 How do you know what I'm like? 871 00:59:40,452 --> 00:59:47,458 All I know is you're the most amazing person with weak ankles I've ever met. 872 00:59:52,589 --> 00:59:58,511 Meg, when I'm with you, I don't feel so alone. 873 00:59:59,763 --> 01:00:02,265 Sometimes it's better to be alone. 874 01:00:02,349 --> 01:00:03,599 What do you mean? 875 01:00:03,684 --> 01:00:05,768 Nobody can hurt you. 876 01:00:09,439 --> 01:00:10,731 Meg? 877 01:00:11,191 --> 01:00:14,735 I would never, ever hurt you. 878 01:00:14,820 --> 01:00:21,033 And I don't wanna hurt you, so let's both do ourselves a favour and stop this 879 01:00:22,494 --> 01:00:24,745 before we... 880 01:00:25,205 --> 01:00:29,041 All right! Break it up! Break it up! Party's over! 881 01:00:29,126 --> 01:00:31,961 - I been lookin' all over this town! - Calm down, mutton man. 882 01:00:32,045 --> 01:00:33,337 It was all my fault. 883 01:00:33,422 --> 01:00:36,257 You're already on my list, sister, so don't make it worse! 884 01:00:39,261 --> 01:00:41,971 And as for you, ya bum, you're gonna go to the stadium 885 01:00:42,055 --> 01:00:44,015 and you're gonna be put through the workout of your life! 886 01:00:44,099 --> 01:00:47,393 - Now get on the horse. - Okay, okay. 887 01:00:48,729 --> 01:00:51,355 - I'm sorry. - He'll get over it. 888 01:00:57,070 --> 01:01:00,156 Move! Move, move, move, move, move! Move! 889 01:01:05,871 --> 01:01:10,124 Hey, watch it, watch it! Watch it! Keep your goo-goo eyes on the... 890 01:01:12,919 --> 01:01:16,505 That's it. Next time, I drive. 891 01:01:24,181 --> 01:01:27,224 What's the matter with me? 892 01:01:27,309 --> 01:01:30,144 You'd think a girl would learn. 893 01:01:31,063 --> 01:01:35,316 If there's a prize for rotten judgement 894 01:01:35,525 --> 01:01:39,278 I guess I've already won that 895 01:01:39,780 --> 01:01:43,949 No man is worth the aggravation 896 01:01:44,034 --> 01:01:47,995 That's ancient history Been there, done that 897 01:01:48,080 --> 01:01:51,916 Who d'ya think you're kidding He's the Earth and heaven to you 898 01:01:52,000 --> 01:01:55,878 Try to keep it hidden Honey, we can see right through you 899 01:01:55,962 --> 01:01:57,713 - Oh, no - Girl, you can't conceal it 900 01:01:57,798 --> 01:02:02,676 We know how you feel and who you're thinkin' of 901 01:02:04,346 --> 01:02:08,265 No chance, no way I won't say it, no, no 902 01:02:08,350 --> 01:02:12,061 You swoon, you sigh Why deny it? 903 01:02:12,145 --> 01:02:16,607 It's too clich�, I won't say I'm in love 904 01:02:19,820 --> 01:02:23,489 I thought my heart had learned its lesson 905 01:02:23,573 --> 01:02:27,118 It feels so good when you start out 906 01:02:27,494 --> 01:02:31,163 My head is screaming "Get a grip, girl" 907 01:02:31,623 --> 01:02:35,459 Unless you're dyin' To cry your heart out 908 01:02:35,544 --> 01:02:39,463 You keep on denying Who you are and how you're feelin' 909 01:02:39,548 --> 01:02:43,426 Baby, we're not buyin' Hon, we saw you hit the ceilin' 910 01:02:43,510 --> 01:02:47,388 Face it like a grown-up When you gonna own up that you 911 01:02:47,472 --> 01:02:51,225 - Got - Got it bad? 912 01:02:51,810 --> 01:02:55,771 No chance, no way I won't say it, no, no 913 01:02:55,856 --> 01:02:59,650 - Give up, but give in - Check the grin, you're in love 914 01:02:59,734 --> 01:03:03,612 This scene won't play I won't say I'm in love 915 01:03:03,697 --> 01:03:06,449 You're doing flips Read our lips 916 01:03:06,533 --> 01:03:07,533 You're in love 917 01:03:07,617 --> 01:03:10,077 You're way off base I won't say I'm it 918 01:03:10,162 --> 01:03:11,454 She won't say in love 919 01:03:11,538 --> 01:03:15,541 Get off my case, I won't say it 920 01:03:15,625 --> 01:03:20,045 Girl, don't be proud It's okay, you're in love 921 01:03:23,675 --> 01:03:27,136 At least out loud 922 01:03:27,220 --> 01:03:30,055 I won't say I'm in 923 01:03:30,932 --> 01:03:31,432 Love 924 01:03:49,409 --> 01:03:51,952 Hey, what's the buzz, Meg? 925 01:03:52,037 --> 01:03:55,456 What is the weak link in Wonderboy's chain? 926 01:03:55,540 --> 01:03:57,833 Get yourself another girl. I'm through. 927 01:03:57,918 --> 01:03:59,710 I'm sorry. Do you mind runnin' that by me again? 928 01:03:59,794 --> 01:04:02,463 I must have had a chunk of brimstone wedged in my ear or something. 929 01:04:02,547 --> 01:04:06,675 Then read my lips! Forget it. 930 01:04:06,760 --> 01:04:11,263 Meg, Meg, Meg, my sweet, deluded little minion. 931 01:04:11,348 --> 01:04:16,143 Aren't we forgetting one teensy-weensy, but ever so crucial little, tiny detail? 932 01:04:16,228 --> 01:04:18,187 I own you! 933 01:04:20,190 --> 01:04:22,900 - I got another horn here. - You work for me. 934 01:04:22,984 --> 01:04:25,361 That kid's gonna be doin' laps for a month. 935 01:04:25,445 --> 01:04:28,697 If I say, "Sing," you say, "Hey, name that tune." 936 01:04:28,782 --> 01:04:33,285 If I say, "I want Wonderboy's head on a platter," you say... 937 01:04:33,411 --> 01:04:35,454 Medium or well-done. 938 01:04:36,164 --> 01:04:40,042 I knew that dame was trouble. This is gonna break the kid's heart. 939 01:04:40,126 --> 01:04:43,212 - I'll work on that. - I'm sorry. You hear that sound? 940 01:04:43,296 --> 01:04:48,133 That's the sound of your freedom fluttering out the window forever. 941 01:04:48,218 --> 01:04:51,345 I don't care. I'm not gonna help you hurt him. 942 01:04:52,138 --> 01:04:56,141 I can't believe you're getting so worked up about some guy. 943 01:04:56,226 --> 01:04:58,477 This one is different. He's honest, and he's sweet... 944 01:04:58,562 --> 01:04:59,562 Please! 945 01:04:59,646 --> 01:05:01,413 - He would never do anything to hurt me. - He's a guy! 946 01:05:01,481 --> 01:05:05,693 Besides, O oneness, you can't beat him. 947 01:05:05,777 --> 01:05:09,572 He has no weaknesses. He's gonna... 948 01:05:09,990 --> 01:05:13,742 I think he does, Meg. 949 01:05:13,827 --> 01:05:17,162 I truly think he does. 950 01:05:40,270 --> 01:05:42,646 Hey, Phil! What happened to you? 951 01:05:42,731 --> 01:05:44,148 Kid, we gotta talk. 952 01:05:44,232 --> 01:05:47,901 Phil, I just had the greatest day of my life! 953 01:05:47,986 --> 01:05:50,321 I can't stop thinking about Meg. 954 01:05:51,239 --> 01:05:52,781 She's something else. 955 01:05:52,866 --> 01:05:56,118 Kid, I'm tryin' to talk to ya! Will you come down here and listen? 956 01:05:56,202 --> 01:06:01,040 How can I come down there when I'm feeling so up? 957 01:06:26,316 --> 01:06:27,816 Gotcha! 958 01:06:27,901 --> 01:06:30,235 Very nice! What I'm tryin' to say is... 959 01:06:30,320 --> 01:06:32,863 That if it wasn't for you, I never would have met her. 960 01:06:32,947 --> 01:06:34,782 I owe ya big time. 961 01:06:34,866 --> 01:06:36,617 Will you just knock it off for a couple of seconds? 962 01:06:36,701 --> 01:06:39,328 Rule number 38. Come on, Phil. Keep them up there, huh? 963 01:06:39,412 --> 01:06:42,498 - Phil, I got two words for ya, duck! - Listen to me! She's... 964 01:06:42,582 --> 01:06:43,999 - A dream come true? - Not exactly. 965 01:06:44,084 --> 01:06:46,210 - More beautiful than Aphrodite? - Aside from that! 966 01:06:46,294 --> 01:06:50,506 - The most wonderful... - She's a fraud! 967 01:06:50,590 --> 01:06:53,175 She's been playin' ya for a sap! 968 01:06:53,259 --> 01:06:56,303 - Come on. Stop kiddin' around. - I'm not kiddin' around. 969 01:06:56,388 --> 01:06:58,097 I know you're upset about today, but that's no reason to... 970 01:06:58,181 --> 01:06:59,223 Kid, you're missin' the point. 971 01:06:59,307 --> 01:07:01,725 - The point is, I love her. - She don't love you. 972 01:07:01,810 --> 01:07:04,019 - You're crazy. - She's nothin' but a two-timin'... 973 01:07:04,104 --> 01:07:06,188 - Stop it! - No-good, lyin', schemin'... 974 01:07:06,272 --> 01:07:07,606 Shut up! 975 01:07:10,944 --> 01:07:12,778 Phil. I... 976 01:07:13,822 --> 01:07:14,863 I'm sorry. 977 01:07:14,948 --> 01:07:18,867 Okay, okay, that's it. You won't face the truth? Fine. 978 01:07:18,952 --> 01:07:21,453 Phil, wait. Where you going? 979 01:07:21,579 --> 01:07:25,040 I'm hoppin' the first barge out of here. I'm goin' home. 980 01:07:25,792 --> 01:07:27,876 Fine! 981 01:07:27,961 --> 01:07:30,963 Go! I don't... I don't need you. 982 01:07:33,341 --> 01:07:36,593 I thought you were gonna be the all-time champ, 983 01:07:36,678 --> 01:07:39,179 not the all-time chump. 984 01:07:42,058 --> 01:07:44,810 Geez Louise! What got his goat, huh? 985 01:07:48,440 --> 01:07:49,773 Name is Hades, Lord of the Dead. 986 01:07:49,858 --> 01:07:51,900 - Hi. How ya doin'? - Not now, okay? 987 01:07:51,985 --> 01:07:54,653 Hey, hey. I only need a few seconds and I'm a fast talker, all right? 988 01:07:54,738 --> 01:07:57,573 I've got the major deal in the works. A real estate venture, if you will. 989 01:07:57,657 --> 01:07:59,742 And Herc, you little devil you. May I call you Herc? 990 01:07:59,826 --> 01:08:02,077 You seem to be constantly getting in the way of it. 991 01:08:02,162 --> 01:08:03,370 You've got the wrong guy. 992 01:08:03,455 --> 01:08:06,957 Hear me out, ya little... Just hear me out, okay? 993 01:08:07,041 --> 01:08:09,084 So I would be eternally grateful 994 01:08:09,169 --> 01:08:12,254 if you would just take a day off from this hero business of yours. 995 01:08:12,338 --> 01:08:15,466 I mean, monsters, natural disasters. You wait a day, okay? 996 01:08:15,550 --> 01:08:17,760 - You're out of your mind. - Not so fast, because, ya see, 997 01:08:17,844 --> 01:08:21,221 I do have a little leverage you might wanna know about. 998 01:08:22,015 --> 01:08:24,057 - Meg! - Don't listen, Herc... 999 01:08:26,603 --> 01:08:28,604 - Let her go! - Here's the trade-off. 1000 01:08:28,688 --> 01:08:31,774 You give up your strength for about 24 hours, okay? 1001 01:08:31,858 --> 01:08:33,859 Say the next 24 hours. 1002 01:08:33,943 --> 01:08:35,986 And Meg here is free as a bird and safe from harm. 1003 01:08:36,070 --> 01:08:38,238 We dance, we kiss, we schmooze, we carry on, we go home happy. 1004 01:08:38,323 --> 01:08:39,740 What d'ya say? Come on. 1005 01:08:40,867 --> 01:08:42,868 People are gonna get hurt, aren't they? 1006 01:08:42,952 --> 01:08:46,497 Nah! I mean, it's a possibility. It happens 'cause, you know, it's war. 1007 01:08:46,581 --> 01:08:49,166 But what can I tell ya? Anyway, what do you owe these people? 1008 01:08:49,250 --> 01:08:52,085 Isn't Meg, little smoochy face, isn't she more important than they are? 1009 01:08:52,170 --> 01:08:54,213 - Stop it! - Isn't she? 1010 01:08:54,297 --> 01:08:56,965 You've gotta swear she'll be safe from any harm. 1011 01:08:57,050 --> 01:08:58,967 Fine, okay. I'll give you that one. 1012 01:08:59,052 --> 01:09:01,720 Meg is safe, otherwise you get your strength right back. 1013 01:09:01,805 --> 01:09:05,390 Fine print. Boilerplate. Okay? Done. What d'ya say we shake on it? 1014 01:09:05,475 --> 01:09:07,810 Hey, I really don't have, like, time to bat this around. 1015 01:09:07,894 --> 01:09:09,686 I'm kind of on a schedule here. I got plans for August. Okay? 1016 01:09:09,771 --> 01:09:12,898 I need an answer, like, now. Going once, going twice... 1017 01:09:12,982 --> 01:09:15,400 - All right! - Yes, we're there! 1018 01:09:23,910 --> 01:09:26,745 You may feel just a little queasy. It's kinda natural. 1019 01:09:26,830 --> 01:09:28,747 Maybe you should sit down! 1020 01:09:30,959 --> 01:09:35,045 Now you know how it feels to be just like everybody else. 1021 01:09:35,129 --> 01:09:38,090 Isn't it just peachy? 1022 01:09:38,883 --> 01:09:41,093 You'll love this. One more thing. 1023 01:09:41,177 --> 01:09:45,722 Meg, babe, a deal's a deal. You're off the hook. 1024 01:09:46,474 --> 01:09:49,601 And by the way, Herc, is she not a fabulous little actress? 1025 01:09:49,686 --> 01:09:51,186 - Stop it. - What do you mean? 1026 01:09:51,271 --> 01:09:55,524 I mean your little chickie-poo here was working for me all the time. 1027 01:09:56,526 --> 01:09:58,610 You're... You're lying! 1028 01:09:59,571 --> 01:10:04,366 - Help! - Jeepers, mister, you're really strong. 1029 01:10:04,450 --> 01:10:07,035 Couldn't have done it without you, sugar, sweetheart, babe. 1030 01:10:07,120 --> 01:10:08,453 No! It's not like that. 1031 01:10:08,538 --> 01:10:11,415 I didn't mean to... I couldn't... I... 1032 01:10:11,791 --> 01:10:13,667 I'm so sorry. 1033 01:10:13,751 --> 01:10:18,088 Our hero's a zero! Our hero's a zero! 1034 01:10:19,215 --> 01:10:21,049 Well, gotta blaze. 1035 01:10:21,134 --> 01:10:25,679 There's a whole cosmos up there waiting for me with, hey, my name on it. 1036 01:10:28,057 --> 01:10:31,727 So much for the preliminaries, and now on to the main event! 1037 01:10:44,782 --> 01:10:48,076 Brothers! Titans! 1038 01:10:48,161 --> 01:10:51,413 Look at you in your squalid prison! 1039 01:10:51,497 --> 01:10:54,583 Who put you down there? 1040 01:10:54,667 --> 01:10:56,793 Zeus! 1041 01:10:56,878 --> 01:11:03,342 And now that I set you free, what is the first thing you are going to do? 1042 01:11:03,676 --> 01:11:07,054 - Destroy him! - Good answer. 1043 01:11:09,432 --> 01:11:13,435 Crush Zeus! 1044 01:11:16,147 --> 01:11:19,358 Freeze him! 1045 01:11:23,780 --> 01:11:26,239 Melt Zeus! 1046 01:11:27,325 --> 01:11:32,204 Blow him away! 1047 01:11:34,707 --> 01:11:36,875 Zeus! 1048 01:11:39,170 --> 01:11:40,796 Guys? 1049 01:11:41,255 --> 01:11:43,173 Olympus would be that way. 1050 01:11:44,050 --> 01:11:47,386 - Zeus! - Freeze him! 1051 01:11:48,221 --> 01:11:50,097 Hold it, bright eye. 1052 01:11:50,223 --> 01:11:53,225 I have a special job for you, my optic friend. 1053 01:12:01,776 --> 01:12:04,528 Destroy Zeus! 1054 01:12:04,696 --> 01:12:07,906 We're in trouble! Big trouble! I gotta... 1055 01:12:08,491 --> 01:12:10,909 My lord and lady, the Titans have escaped, 1056 01:12:10,994 --> 01:12:12,995 and they're practically at our gates! 1057 01:12:13,079 --> 01:12:17,165 Sound the alarm! Launch an immediate counterattack! 1058 01:12:17,250 --> 01:12:19,793 - Go! Go! - Gone, babe. 1059 01:12:29,137 --> 01:12:30,637 Charge! 1060 01:12:31,514 --> 01:12:33,640 On to battle! 1061 01:12:44,944 --> 01:12:46,987 You windbag! 1062 01:12:54,954 --> 01:12:58,457 Hercules! 1063 01:12:58,833 --> 01:13:01,710 Where are you? 1064 01:13:03,796 --> 01:13:06,048 What can we do? 1065 01:13:06,132 --> 01:13:09,342 - Where is Hercules? - Yeah, Hercules'll save us. 1066 01:13:09,427 --> 01:13:13,388 Hercules! 1067 01:13:13,473 --> 01:13:18,143 Come out! Face me! 1068 01:13:19,520 --> 01:13:22,773 What are you doing? Without your strength, you'll be killed. 1069 01:13:23,316 --> 01:13:25,400 There are worse things. 1070 01:13:25,485 --> 01:13:26,735 Run! 1071 01:13:26,819 --> 01:13:29,571 Wait! Stop! 1072 01:13:29,655 --> 01:13:33,116 - Hey, look! It's Hercules. - Thank the gods! 1073 01:13:33,201 --> 01:13:36,161 - We're saved! - So... 1074 01:13:36,245 --> 01:13:39,289 You mighty Hercules. 1075 01:13:51,886 --> 01:13:54,262 Easy, horsefeathers. 1076 01:13:54,847 --> 01:13:56,765 Stop twitching. 1077 01:13:56,849 --> 01:14:00,060 Listen. Hercules is in trouble. 1078 01:14:00,812 --> 01:14:01,937 We've gotta find Phil. 1079 01:14:02,021 --> 01:14:04,523 He's the only one who can talk some sense into him. 1080 01:14:09,070 --> 01:14:11,446 Get back, blast you! 1081 01:14:16,119 --> 01:14:18,995 - Chihuahua. - Zeus! 1082 01:14:20,998 --> 01:14:24,251 Come on! Hurry up! We're shovin' off here! 1083 01:14:24,377 --> 01:14:25,877 Phil! 1084 01:14:26,045 --> 01:14:28,171 Phil, Hercules needs your help! 1085 01:14:28,256 --> 01:14:30,924 What does he need me for when he's got friends like you? 1086 01:14:31,008 --> 01:14:35,554 - He won't listen to me. - Good! He's finally learned something. 1087 01:14:35,638 --> 01:14:38,890 Look, I know what I did was wrong, but this isn't about me. 1088 01:14:38,975 --> 01:14:43,270 It's about him. If you don't help him now, Phil, he'll die. 1089 01:14:43,396 --> 01:14:45,689 I need more thunderbolts! 1090 01:14:45,773 --> 01:14:48,275 Hephaestus has been captured, my lord. 1091 01:14:48,359 --> 01:14:50,735 Everyone's been captured. I've been captured! 1092 01:14:50,820 --> 01:14:52,779 Hey, hey! Watch the glasses. 1093 01:14:59,078 --> 01:15:01,997 Zeusy, I'm home! 1094 01:15:02,081 --> 01:15:05,917 Hades. You're behind this! 1095 01:15:06,002 --> 01:15:07,919 You are correct, sir! 1096 01:15:12,383 --> 01:15:14,259 Flea. 1097 01:15:18,806 --> 01:15:21,725 - Hercules! - Phil. 1098 01:15:21,809 --> 01:15:23,810 Come on, kid. Come on. Fight back. 1099 01:15:23,936 --> 01:15:26,980 Come on, you can take this bum. This guy's a pushover. Look at him. 1100 01:15:27,064 --> 01:15:29,107 You were right all along, Phil. 1101 01:15:30,318 --> 01:15:32,194 Dreams are for rookies. 1102 01:15:32,278 --> 01:15:35,530 No, no, no, no, kid. Givin' up is for rookies. 1103 01:15:35,615 --> 01:15:37,657 I came back 'cause I'm not quittin' on ya. 1104 01:15:37,742 --> 01:15:39,951 I'm willing to go the distance. 1105 01:15:40,036 --> 01:15:41,786 How 'bout you? 1106 01:15:44,373 --> 01:15:47,542 Me bite off head! 1107 01:15:51,380 --> 01:15:53,632 Whoa, baby! 1108 01:16:07,188 --> 01:16:09,481 Hercules! Look out! 1109 01:16:09,607 --> 01:16:12,400 Meg! No! 1110 01:16:21,369 --> 01:16:23,119 What's happening? 1111 01:16:24,830 --> 01:16:27,666 Hades' deal is broken. 1112 01:16:28,834 --> 01:16:31,002 He promised I wouldn't get hurt. 1113 01:16:31,754 --> 01:16:33,505 Meg. 1114 01:16:33,589 --> 01:16:36,383 Why did you... 1115 01:16:36,467 --> 01:16:37,759 You didn't have to... 1116 01:16:37,843 --> 01:16:43,014 People always do crazy things when they're in love. 1117 01:16:44,934 --> 01:16:46,184 Meg. 1118 01:16:46,310 --> 01:16:48,353 Meg, I... I... 1119 01:16:48,854 --> 01:16:52,315 Are you always this articulate? 1120 01:16:55,569 --> 01:16:59,447 You haven't got much time. You can still stop Hades. 1121 01:17:00,574 --> 01:17:03,076 I'll watch over her, kid. 1122 01:17:03,953 --> 01:17:05,912 You're gonna be all right. 1123 01:17:06,247 --> 01:17:08,206 I promise. 1124 01:17:10,668 --> 01:17:12,544 Let's go, Pegasus! 1125 01:17:15,006 --> 01:17:17,966 Hup, two, three, four. Come on, everybody! 1126 01:17:18,134 --> 01:17:20,093 I can't hear you! 1127 01:17:20,803 --> 01:17:24,973 I swear to you, Hades, when I get out of this... 1128 01:17:25,057 --> 01:17:27,976 I'm the one giving orders now, bolt boy. 1129 01:17:28,060 --> 01:17:30,478 And I think I'm gonna like it here. 1130 01:17:30,563 --> 01:17:33,356 Don't get too comfortable, Hades! 1131 01:17:35,026 --> 01:17:36,484 Hercules! 1132 01:17:36,569 --> 01:17:38,903 This ought to even the odds! 1133 01:17:41,574 --> 01:17:44,159 Yeah, Hercules! Thank you, man. 1134 01:17:44,243 --> 01:17:45,577 Get them! 1135 01:17:48,164 --> 01:17:50,206 Hey! 1136 01:17:50,291 --> 01:17:54,461 No! Get him! Not me! Him! 1137 01:17:56,255 --> 01:18:00,759 Follow the fingers! Him! The yutz with the horse. 1138 01:18:07,641 --> 01:18:09,476 Thank you, my boy. 1139 01:18:09,643 --> 01:18:14,314 Nice horsey! My intentions were pure! I really was attracted to you. 1140 01:18:17,318 --> 01:18:18,693 Throw! 1141 01:18:19,862 --> 01:18:23,031 Now watch your old man work! 1142 01:18:27,703 --> 01:18:32,916 Guys, get your titanic rears in gear and kick some Olympian butt! 1143 01:18:33,709 --> 01:18:35,460 Is my hair out? 1144 01:19:02,780 --> 01:19:04,531 Thanks a ton, Wonderboy. 1145 01:19:04,615 --> 01:19:07,409 But at least I've got one swell consolation prize, 1146 01:19:07,493 --> 01:19:11,246 a friend of yours who's dying to see me. 1147 01:19:12,164 --> 01:19:13,764 Meg. 1148 01:19:51,412 --> 01:19:53,204 Meg, no. 1149 01:20:13,392 --> 01:20:15,560 I'm sorry, kid. 1150 01:20:18,355 --> 01:20:21,232 There's some things you just can't change. 1151 01:20:23,777 --> 01:20:25,653 Yes, I can. 1152 01:20:29,450 --> 01:20:31,826 We were so close! 1153 01:20:31,911 --> 01:20:33,411 So close. 1154 01:20:33,496 --> 01:20:35,371 We tripped at the finish line. Why? 1155 01:20:35,456 --> 01:20:39,417 Because our little nut, Meg, has to go all noble. 1156 01:20:43,797 --> 01:20:46,508 - Where's Meg? - Look who's here. 1157 01:20:46,592 --> 01:20:48,801 Wonderboy, you are too much. 1158 01:20:48,886 --> 01:20:52,722 - Let her go. - Get a grip. 1159 01:20:52,806 --> 01:20:54,933 Come here, come here. Let me show you around. 1160 01:20:55,935 --> 01:20:59,437 Well, well. It's a small underworld after all. Huh? 1161 01:21:00,523 --> 01:21:02,482 Meg! 1162 01:21:02,566 --> 01:21:04,359 No, no, no. Mustn't touch. 1163 01:21:04,443 --> 01:21:06,986 You see, Meg's running with a new crowd these days. 1164 01:21:07,112 --> 01:21:08,947 And not a very lively one, at that. 1165 01:21:10,783 --> 01:21:14,035 You like making deals. Take me in Meg's place. 1166 01:21:14,119 --> 01:21:19,707 Well. The son of my hated rival trapped forever in a river of death. 1167 01:21:19,792 --> 01:21:22,210 - Going once. - Is there a downside to this? 1168 01:21:22,294 --> 01:21:25,380 - Going twice! - Okay, okay, okay, okay. 1169 01:21:25,464 --> 01:21:28,925 You get her out. She goes, you stay. 1170 01:21:31,887 --> 01:21:33,471 You know what slipped my mind? 1171 01:21:33,556 --> 01:21:35,431 You'll be dead before you can get to her. 1172 01:21:35,516 --> 01:21:37,100 That's not a problem, is it? 1173 01:22:05,504 --> 01:22:07,922 What's the matter with these scissors? 1174 01:22:08,007 --> 01:22:10,508 The thread won't cut. 1175 01:22:18,058 --> 01:22:20,768 This is... This is impossible! 1176 01:22:20,853 --> 01:22:23,771 You can't be alive! You'd have to be a... 1177 01:22:23,856 --> 01:22:25,273 - A god? - A god? 1178 01:22:29,945 --> 01:22:33,656 Hercules, stop! You can't do this to me. You can't... 1179 01:22:33,741 --> 01:22:36,034 Fine. Okay. Listen. 1180 01:22:36,118 --> 01:22:39,120 Okay. Well, I deserved that. Herc, Herc, Herc. Can we talk? 1181 01:22:39,204 --> 01:22:41,122 Your dad, he's a fun guy, right? 1182 01:22:41,206 --> 01:22:43,416 So maybe you could put in a word with him, 1183 01:22:43,500 --> 01:22:45,793 and he'd kinda blow this whole thing off, you know? 1184 01:22:45,878 --> 01:22:48,463 Meg, Meg, talk to him. A little schmooze... 1185 01:22:51,592 --> 01:22:56,304 Get away from me! Don't touch me! Get your slimy souls off me! 1186 01:22:57,348 --> 01:22:59,891 He's not gonna be happy when he gets outta there. 1187 01:22:59,975 --> 01:23:02,852 You mean, if he gets outta there. 1188 01:23:02,936 --> 01:23:04,896 - If. If is good. - Taxi! 1189 01:23:04,980 --> 01:23:07,231 I don't feel so good. I feel a little... 1190 01:23:31,757 --> 01:23:34,676 Wonderboy, what... 1191 01:23:34,760 --> 01:23:36,302 Why did you... 1192 01:23:36,929 --> 01:23:40,014 People always do crazy things 1193 01:23:40,099 --> 01:23:41,599 when they're in love. 1194 01:23:50,776 --> 01:23:52,276 Hey, hey, hey! 1195 01:24:04,289 --> 01:24:06,749 Three cheers for the mighty Hercules! 1196 01:24:06,834 --> 01:24:09,377 Yeah! Flowers for everybody! 1197 01:24:23,308 --> 01:24:27,311 Hercules, we're so proud of you. 1198 01:24:28,480 --> 01:24:29,731 Mother. 1199 01:24:32,151 --> 01:24:35,570 Fine work, my boy! You've done it! 1200 01:24:35,654 --> 01:24:38,072 You're a true hero. 1201 01:24:38,157 --> 01:24:42,368 You were willing to give your life to rescue this young woman. 1202 01:24:42,453 --> 01:24:46,205 For a true hero isn't measured by the size of his strength, 1203 01:24:46,290 --> 01:24:49,250 but by the strength of his heart. 1204 01:24:50,002 --> 01:24:54,255 Now, at last, my son, 1205 01:24:54,923 --> 01:24:57,633 you can come home. 1206 01:25:11,064 --> 01:25:15,318 Congratulations, Wonderboy. You'll make one heck of a god. 1207 01:25:23,368 --> 01:25:27,747 Father, this is the moment I've always dreamed of. 1208 01:25:28,707 --> 01:25:30,041 But... 1209 01:25:32,044 --> 01:25:36,756 A life without Meg, even an immortal life, 1210 01:25:37,049 --> 01:25:39,884 would be empty. 1211 01:25:41,553 --> 01:25:42,762 I... 1212 01:25:44,139 --> 01:25:46,641 I wish to stay on Earth with her. 1213 01:25:46,725 --> 01:25:49,101 I finally know where I belong. 1214 01:26:03,408 --> 01:26:05,201 Hit it, ladies! 1215 01:26:06,161 --> 01:26:10,540 - Gonna shout it from the mountaintops - A star is born 1216 01:26:10,624 --> 01:26:14,627 - It's the time for pulling out the stops - A star is born 1217 01:26:14,711 --> 01:26:18,756 - Honey, hit us with a hallelu - That kid came shining through 1218 01:26:18,841 --> 01:26:20,716 Girl, sing the song 1219 01:26:20,801 --> 01:26:26,556 - Come blow your horn - A star is born 1220 01:26:26,640 --> 01:26:30,810 - He's a hero who can please the crowd - A star is born 1221 01:26:30,894 --> 01:26:35,064 Come on, everybody shout out loud A star is born 1222 01:26:35,148 --> 01:26:39,402 Just remember in the darkest hour within your heart's the power 1223 01:26:39,528 --> 01:26:43,072 For makin' you a hero, too 1224 01:26:43,156 --> 01:26:46,534 So don't lose hope when you're forlorn 1225 01:26:46,618 --> 01:26:47,660 That's Phil's boy! 1226 01:26:47,744 --> 01:26:52,039 Just keep your eyes upon the skies 1227 01:26:52,124 --> 01:26:56,711 Every night, a star is Right in sight, a star is 1228 01:26:56,795 --> 01:27:01,465 - Burning bright, a star is born - A star is born 1229 01:32:48,396 --> 01:32:50,231 What d'ya say? It's happy ending time! 1230 01:32:50,315 --> 01:32:52,483 Everybody's got a little taste of somethin' but me. 1231 01:32:52,609 --> 01:32:56,070 I got nothin'. I'm here with nothin'. Anybody listenin'? 1232 01:32:56,154 --> 01:32:58,405 It's like I'm... What am I, an echo or something? 1233 01:32:58,490 --> 01:33:03,911 Hello? Hello? Am I talking to, what? Hyperspace? Hello, it's me.91319